#He got all his scars fighting the other sharks for food
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Hey egg!! Recently was trying to visualize height 🧐 I was wondering how tall (long?) your mer!dca is!! (Totally not asking for future drawing reference..)
🍎 Preferably their hight in apples but cm works too! /silly
Muffin!! Excellent question, even though Sun and Moon are different species (lionfish and whale shark respectively) they're both roughly 1.5 times the size of y/n!
So about 15 apples maybe? :p
#my ask#fnaf sun#fnaf moon#dca fandom#dca au#mer dca#Moon has it so rough oof#He got all his scars fighting the other sharks for food#Though lionfish tend to live alone because of their poisonous nature so Sun is also very very lonely#The poor guys....#Luckily moon find sun's poison to be very tasty#Sort of like a mala sensation#So he lets sun stick around him for now#Yay free meals for the both of them!#my art
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An headcanon for every Tokyo Revengers character. Some are funny, other are not.
Mikey favorite holiday is Halloween cause he can eat as many sweets as he wants and nobody can tell him shit.
Draken secretly wants to go to a spa with Emma. Draken babysits Toman, Emma takes care of the Sano household and they need to rest. He gets flustered if he thinks about sharing a bed with her or taking a bath together at the offsprings.
Baji feeds stray cats and others animals. Animals are naturally drawn to him for some reasons.
Chifuyu likes to watch TV programs of plane crashes. He dreams to be a pilot and he wants to learn how to avoid situations like the ones in the programs.
Takemichi started reading and watching thrillers in the hope they help him sharpen his ability to investigate
Kazutora still has nightmares of his father beating his mother.
Mitsuya keeps himself updated on what is popular amongs kids so he can sew cool things to his sisters like clothes or stuffed animal.
Hakkai is secretly learning Italian since he loves the Godfather series.
Taiju favorite film is Shark Tale.
Pahchin sleeps cuddling his dog.
Pehyan reads scientific books so he can came up with more witty come backs on Pahchin brain.
Angry is really loved by the elderly people in his neighborhood because he's always ready to help them in any way despite his grumpy face. One of the grannies taught him the perfect recipe for ramen.
Smiley is an hardcore naruhina shipper and won't hesitate to fight if someone insults his otp.
When Mucho saw Sanzu for the first time he thought he seemed like a stray cat. That's why he approached him with food aka cheesecake.
Sanzu would like to fix his relationship with Senju but he doesn't know how. Senju is always with Takeomi and he hates Takeomi. He's also scared that if he stops checking on Mikey, even for a second, something bad will happen to him and Shinichiro would have died in vain.
Kisaki has an album of pics of Hinata that he took when she didn't notice.
Hanma really loves movies with a lot of action and comments loud every scene of violence saying what he would have done instead if he was the protagonist.
Kokonoi talks about his days and his thoughts to a framed pic of Akane. He feels like she's still with him.
Inui plays guitar and he's interested in spiritism.
Izana throws darts to a Karen Kurokawa pic pinned on the wall because she ruined his life and his relationship with Emma and Shinichiro.
Kakucho shaves his hair by himself. He's not comfortable with people touching his scar.
Shion is unexpectedly good with children. He's a bit chaotic but overall a good babysitter.
Mochi is really good at cooking and he's proud of it.
Rindou started going to the gym because he was tired of being teased for his chubby cheeks. His guilty pleasure is eating Mac Donald food.
Ran loves 70s lamps, the one with bubbles that are moving up and down inside. They help him sleep.
South loves to dance Latin dances like samba, cha cha cha, rumba etc...
Wakasa has got some fishing trophies in his apartment.
Benkei appears as a tough guy but he loves to sleep with plushies.
Shinichiro has got an organizer that uses as his diary in which he writes his thoughts and notes all of his siblings birthdays.
Takeomi is always scolded by his relatives because of how he wasted his life, raised Haru to be a lunatic and ruined the relationship between Haru and Senju.
Hinata secretly trains in martial arts to help Takemichi, even though she knew he probably won't let her take part in a fight.
Emma often thinks at how good it would be if Izana lives with them. She wants him to have a family.
Yuzuha listen to heavy metal as a let out of her frustration for living with Taiju.
Senju sometimes wants to be adopted by Wakasa so she won't have Takeomi around and maybe Sanzu would visit her. She also hate Concordes.
#tokyo revengers#tokyo revengers headcanons#mikey tokyo revengers#draken#baji keisuke#chifuyu x reader#mitsuya takashi#tenjiku#ran haitani#rindou haitani#izana kurokawa#kakucho
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FINALLY finished this
turns out soon means one week+ in my little lizard brain, that's cool
anyways!!! meg
megalo don content,,, food
also, as a treat for making myself take so much to finish this, some of my AU lore rambling thing under the cut (warning, pretty long)
in my design, most of his exterior Nitro armor is removable, being an extension of the augument inside his body, which pumps Nitro both through his lungs and bloodstream, crossing from front to back through his torso. His tubes would be attached to certain openings around his body, which could also have 'lids' put on for safe closing. Every area where the Nitro pumps directly into his body would have 'Nitro burn'- a less proeminent glow than the one in his fueled up form. I, as many others also do, like to think that his mask actually comes off (I haven't drawn him unmaksed yet, but I'll get to that too eventually). One headcanon I have is that when you take his medallion in game, what you take is actually his mask and use it.
For his body I went for a slightly leaner strongman build, as he doesn't seem way too bulky in his non-fueled form, but he's still considerably bigger than most others. I tried to give him a 'scarred shark' look, and gave him burn scars on one arm from a misfiring Nitro Fist hit accident
also his hair look so so fluffy in game and for WHAT
(note, this is all to be taken as an AU. i am by no means well versed enough in Fortnite lore to make something close to canon or actual on point headcanons lol,,, tl;dr at the bottom!!)
i feel like the whole theory with Meg and big chuggus being somehow related is true, but not necessarily in the way others present it usually i don't think they're snapshots of each other in any way, i just think that they've been basically created 'for the same purpose', maybe in the different 'realities?' I'm not 100% sure how the zero point reset worked considering Midas was technically the same and all
so let's say Chaos had created the Slurp legends and Slurp creatures back during the GHOST/SHADOW conflict i like to think that Meg might have been created sometime during then too- a more refined variant of the technology used on big chuggus, enough for him not to end up as brain dead as big chuggus himself (sorry big chuggus)
Megalo Don could have been a fleet leader for the naval forces, as he has an overall very reoccurring military theme with his insignia and stuff. Maybe he was hired by Chaos to aid him and willingly allowing Chaos to modify him into the 'perfect leader', boosted by slurp into near perfection I believe his Oasis style would be what his 'original' look was, with Slurp coursing through his pumps instead of Nitro
so how did he turn into the Meg we know? during the GHOST/SHADOW conflict, his crew got destroyed, probably, and they somehow ended up punished to the Pandora's Box, but not dead like Midas, just punished there I like to think that there is not only one Pandora's Box, technically, and that they're basically some sort of even higher security 'prison' for things deemed disasters under certain circumstances, putting mortal beings into their own personal hell. The ones imprisoned in the Pandora's Box arent necessarily 'dead', like shade Midas in the Underworld, but they're not alive in the full sense either. This particular Nitro filled Pandora's Box sprouted there, leaving behind veins of pure Nitro in the depths of the earth through which the Box had erupted.
in the Pandora's Box, stuck in an infinite purgatory loop of fighting and dying, the slurp that fueled his crew quite literally rotted into Nitro, and Megalo Don himself basically 'rusted' from the rot. The Nitro, essence of death, in a way, compared to Slurp, slowly and surely altered Meg's brain, turning him from a calculated leader into a terrifying tyrant, with nihilistic views regarding his crew and conquest, as he saw them all die over and over again… Another case of 'rotten' slurp beings being Sludge, maybe, as he could perhaps be read as a Slurp creature gone 'bad' (slurp to nitro)
Meg's mind got clouded with the only thing he could comprehend anymore- Nitro coursing through his veins, through his ship, through anything in the living hell he experienced in the Pandora's Box. (Ultrakill flesh prison sounding aah) Obtained by conquest or murder, with destruction being the only method he could even comprehend using to get it, his very life seeming to depend on Nitro at that point, and being released into the world again brought him bo purpose than to seize back all of his Nitro and keep fighting more and more
after he and his crew escaped from the Pandora's Box, Meg had intercepted a boat droning the Island from SHADOW, which had went to scout out Helios after Midas' escape from The Underworld, unaware of the Pandora's Box opening right then, and getting caught in the sandstorm. Meg had just the luck to capture Chaos (or a snapshot), the very man who had taken away his humanity and turned him into a (now) Nitro-fueled beast. From them he also took the island plans, which helped his crew settle in as fast as they did, the Redline Rig digging for Nitro the very moment they got there and the Nitrodrome building itself over the abandoned Fencing Fields, repurposing the fizz machinery there into the dome's car destruction traps
i also like to think that Meg has a father/daughters bond with Scarr and the Machinist, with the Machinist maybe being one of the original scientists on Chaos' team, whom had helped him stabilize his new equipment at the time, and Scarr being a dedicated member of his fleet since before getting banished into the Pandora's Box. Initially, both Scarr and the Machinist would have admired him for his courageous leadership and respected him as a leader, but through their decline in the Pandora's Box, their found family bond only strengthened, with the two of them being probably his only subordinates he actually cares about
i also like to imagine that he had made most of the transmissions particularly silly in hopes of having them tune in on either patrol or at the Nitrodrome and make them laugh with the over the top commentary
tl;dr: i headcanon megalo don as an ex-slurp legend made by Chaos who had rotted to nitro in the Pandora's Box. His Oasis style is what he looked like pre-Box. Also the Mechanist and Ringmaster Scarr are his found family daughters
#fortnite#art#fanart#fnbr#fortnite fanart#fortnite megalo don#megalo don#megalo don fortnite#feral feral i am going feral over yet another fortnite man
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ALL THAT'S STAR WARS MASTERLIST
Hi hello on my Star Wars blog. You can call me Moss or Kosh, and I'm here to deliver all the weird aus I make for this fandom
'*' means I am not proud of the drawing and it's old :>
(+snippet) means there's an additional piece of fanfic to match the artwork
THE BAD BATCH
Hybrid Bad Batch: Clone Force 99 are hybrids of Jango DNA and another sentient species. Trandoshan Hunter, Chiss Tech, Zygerrian Crosshair, Lasat Wrecker, and Diathim Omega -all that's chibi <3 | a peaceful nap | and a Bookmark -original (old) designs* -baby batch sleeping pile* -Baby batch squad photo -Baby Wrecker in Lula onesie -Wrecker's a show off (cadets)* -The Batch all grown up -nap in the sunlight -Crosshair got put in the air jail for scratching pilot seats -S1ep1 screenshot redraw -mission going wrong page 1 -Zygerrian mission going awful -Wrecker's bo-rifle -A nap after Wrecker got blown up -Hunter's chest scars -Crosshair vs the red dot -Tech and his pillow Wrecker -Tech helps Hunter with his molt -Snowy day with Omega and Hunter -Hunter protective over Omega -Crosshair's murder mittens and Wrecker's murder mittens
Mermaid AU: Four mers raised by a fisherman called 99, Lionfish Hunter, octopus Tech, Whale shark Wrecker, eel Crosshair. There are also the betta twins Fives and Echo, and manta ray Omega, but these three the batch meets after being captured by Admiral Rampart Ref Sheets: Tech | Omega | Hunter | Crosshair | Wrecker | Domino Twins and CHIBI BOOKMARK -How does Tech's underside look? -Baby Wrecker and 99 and part 2 (+snippet) -Doctor Nala Se and Omega -Kiddos Tech, Hunter and Crosshair -Wrecker meets Tech -Teens resting and 99 fishing on a warm afternoon -Hunter teaching Omega to swim in open waters -Crosshair in trouble + Mayday finding him -Hemlock and subject 9902 -An unrelated food pic and Hemlock eating it
Centaur Wild West AU: (i'll add explanation later) -Ref sheet for the Batchers -Wrecker vs Zygerrian hunters -Wrecker nad Lula napping
The Bad Batch x Detroit: Become Human: Android Force 99 is a team of four specialized androids that hunt down deviants -Ref photo -Wrecker saves Echo from humans -WR-993 protects TH-992 from bullets -Crosshair CS-994 kills his brother Tech the deviant TH-992 -Crosshair and Tech getting out of the Cyberlife building
Tantiss Batch: Hemlock once visited Kamino before the war, finding himself curious about four defective clones slated for decommissioning, all young and easy to mold. He took them as his side project, transporting the batch to his lab on Tantiss, where he raised them -Kiddos Wrecker and Tech -Wrecker and Tech, their brothers the night after rescue (+ snippet)
Fairy Batch: Fairies are born from normal insect eggs infused with a special elixir, their wings match whatever egg they hatched from Fairies that are born on the same day treat each other like brothers Each fairy picks a job in their community, hunters gathering food, defenders fighting birds and other dangers, and engineers creating new tools and other stuff -Ref sheet for the Batchers -Eepy batchers -Phee finds a surprise in a lab
Coraline AU: Omega and her family arrive at their new house, where she meets her other Brothers with buttons for eyes -Omega and other Tech (+ snippet)
LULA in all the AUs
CLONE WARS
Dragon Jedi AU (Fantasy medieval setting) The United Kingdoms of the Republic own all the dragons on their territory. When the Confederacy of independent Kingdoms began a war against the Republic, the Kingdom of Mandalore provided their soldiers; the princes of the house of Mereel being the leaders. Every battalion was given a dragon to fight alongside them, and during the time spent together the soldiers realised that the creatures were as smart as humans and kept against their will Which one can you pet? ANAKIN Ref sheet | and Fox | in harness | OBI-WAN Ref sheet+ Ahsoka | and Cody | PLO Ref sheet | and Wolfee | AAYLA Ref sheet | and Bly | KIT Ref sheet | and Monnk | MACE Ref sheet | and Ponds | QUINLAN Ref sheet | and Fox | QUI GON Ref sheet | MAUL, ASAJJ, and MOTHER TALZIN Ref sheet other dragons
Mecha AU: Kaminoas created an army of droids for the Republic. 10-15 meters tall, perfect in combat, and have suspiciously advanced AI. It is located in tubes filled with thick, red liquid, which, if not cracked or destroyed, can be transported into a new metal body. Some of the mechas are modified so that the Jedi can pilot them from the inside, with the commander and the general working together. -Rex and Cody* -Anakin and Rex -Blank trooper design
Non-connected Rexwalker drawings
Medically mandated comforting pressure Rexwalker week 2023 Vampire AU Vaderkin exchange: Massive Mer Ani and Rex
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KHR Witch Au - Varia
Decided to give short rambles about my au. Only do the Varia for now because I'll be busy later. But, I'll do the others later, don't worry!!
@upsilambic @myrmyrtheorca @lixenn
Xanxus - Witch - The once intended heir to the Vongola Coven, but now the head of the independent branch called the Varia. Mostly the same as his canon counterpart, just magically and closer to Tsuna in a reluctant big brother way. He also has more scars from his familiars love for biting him. Namely Squalo. He's grown so used to it, it hardly phases him and he's made a weekly schedule for his familiars.
The Familiars
Squalo - Shark Siren - An aquatic siren with shark like features. He's loyal to his witch through and through. This doesn't stop him from biting Xanxus occasionally however, as for his species, it's an act of deep affection to bite someone close to you. He doesn't like using his siren song, finding it far more fun to fight and hunt without it.
Lussuria - Drider - Half spider, half man. Is there anymore to be said? Lussuria here, while also being the group's main healer, is also in charge of things like mending clothes with his silk, preparing whatever food the other's buy or hunt, and so on. He too, like Squalo, loves to affectionately bite Xanxus. However, he's not allowed to do it that often thanks to the paralyzing venom his bite carries.
Levi A Than - Manticore - Despite what his name would imply, this man isn't any kind of sea creatures or dragon. He's partially insecure about that. He, yet again, is still very aligned with his canon counterpart personality wise. (we remove the creepiness of Levi in this household, because what the hell Akira Amano) He unlike the others, doesn't bite often, it's only happened a few times and he gets upset with himself over it. He does however love to jab the hell out of things, and occasionally people, with his scorpion tail. Thankfully, his venom is easier to control than Lussuria's, so most don't end up poisoned when he does this unless he wants them to. He's also the one who taught Bel how to fly because he has the most similar wings, his are just bigger because of his species.
Belphegor - Incubus - So, see his species right there? By all means, that's what Bel is and what he looks like (bat wings, that thin tail with that pointy heart shaped thing on the end, curved horns), but that's not how he acts. This is because Xanxus technically summoned him when Bel was a child and Bel refused to leave, therefore he wasn't taught any of his species skills or anything, he just has the physical traits and abilities. Instead his personality and skills far more align with the fae because Viper/Mammon was the main one raising him. He definitely has a complex about this, but good luck getting him to admit that. He's bitten Xanxus once too, but more so as a joke and because majority of the others do it.
Viper/Mammon - Fairy/Fae - Normally I'd reserve them for the Arcobaleno, but it's just fitting to put them here after Bel. Technically, not one of Xanxus' familiars, they're Luce's. But, they are Xanxus' tutor and mentor technically. Now they just stick around because they got attached to Xanxus emotionally. Under their cloak they have big ol dot-lined white moth wings (please look up this moth, it's so cute) and sometimes they ever present with antennas, though that seems to change whenever someone looks away or at them. Tricks and scams and pranks are their bread and butter, they love teaching people the art of doing them.
Fran - Kitsune - Viper/Mammon's latest student in the art of trickery. At least their art of trickery, Mukuro and Chrome already taught him theirs. Rather young for a kitsune and familiar, but very strong nonetheless. He adores pranking though. Be it scamming others with leaves disguised as money, convincing people that mud is a lavish meal, and more. He's an unstoppable force and only getting influenced to do worse.
#katekyo hitman reborn#khr#khr varia#khr viper#khr mammon#khr xanxus#khr belphegor#khr squalo#khr lussuria#khr levi#khr fran#khr au
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"Rumble" theories, headcanons, and musings
My personal opinion on the events in the movie and the events before and after it. Correct me if something is wrong!
Perhaps I've gone too far, but I think - it's closer to the reality of the world we were shown in the movie.
Theory on the disappearance of Rayburn and Jimbo. At the beginning of the movie we are told that they disappeared (died) somewhere at the sea. After we are shown Stoker's new monster - Tentacular, which all his appearance indicates he's marine-type monster. Based on these two facts we conclude that Tentacular is involved in the disappearance of Rayburn and Jimbo. Brilliant deduction, I know.
Headcanons!
Tentacular got a scar on his face from Rayburn's claws when he tried to drown him.
T and Rayburn are about the same age and knew each other long before the events of the movie. Their paths parted after Ray's decision to become a wrestler and the birth of Steve (Rayburn Jr.). Hence, the envy of success and the desire to be better than his former friend.
Back to the theory. Tentacular comes in Stoker sometime after the tragedy, under the guise of "I hear you're looking for a new champion". Since the town had big problems and came in grief after the "disappearance" of their favorites, they gladly accept T, and Siggy becomes his trainer.
Headcanons!
Siggy probably knows that Tentacular is involved in the deaths of Jimbo and Rayburn, but doesn't show it until he's sure it's true. OR he took part in it too.
The loss of his leg is unrelated to the incident in the sea, as in the movie in Vinnie's flashbacks, Sig was already wearing a prosthetic leg.
After the death of his father, Steve may have lived with his mother away from the city for some time. There is no mention of her in the movie, but I assume she just lives somewhere far far away from civilization. The second option - Steve leave town and just wandered around the region/state for a few years until he got into underground monster fights because he needed money to keep living.
Another interesting moment. Siggy tells Winnie to stop the fight, because if Tentacular senses blood, the situation will get out of hand. What did he mean by that? Sharks have a phenomenon called "food fever." It's when there's a lot of blood in a place and the amount of blood makes sharks go crazy and eat everything. T is a shark, and a pretty big one; perhaps his senses are more heightened than normal sharks too. If Steve got a nosebleed during a fight, for example, T would probably go berserk and destroy not only the arena, but also the stadium and even the entire city. Of course, not without casualties, and here the irreversible process of total 4uckup. We wouldn't see it in the movie, so we will stop only at the destruction of the stadium (take into: all the people have time to evacuate).
Other.
Not all monsters in the movie universe are wrestlers. Example: Mac is a monster who works as a commentator (albeit on the subject of wrestling). Monsters, due to their incredible strength, can be useful in professions where that strength is especially valuable. Such as construction and demolition on a large scale, heavy lifting, working at heights/depths, mining, etc. Those who are not satisfied with either of those things go into the creative arts. I'd really like to see a monster DJ!!!
"Tentacular" is a stage name. Personally, I think the name "Nigel" would suit him perfectly. Name meaning: champion, perseverance, independence, zeal; also: cruelty, egoism, envy, hatred. The colors are blue and purple, the element is water. 100% hit. It's compatible with his looks, too.
Steve and his father can tolerate extra high temperatures.
In the second part of the movie (if it ever comes out) Steve will bring his "dancing style" to the end and it will be more like wrestling. However, lazy as he was, he will remain lazy.
There is a very small chance that Rayburn and Jimbo survived, but decided to lay low after the "mysterious disappearance".
Ray and T are about 20-23 years old at the time of their friendship (before the movie), 35-45 years old during the movie. Steve is 3-5 years older than Winnie. I can get very confused about the timing of what's going on in the movie, so consider this as headcanon. I'm having trouble with "time feeling"…
Winnie is a foot-fetishist.
#rumble#rumble 2021#rumble 2022#rumble movie#tentacular#rayburn#winnie coyle#steve the stupendous#rumble tentacular#rumble steve#rumble rayburn#monster#monsters
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was thinking more about mar'eyce zenith's job as forest service pilot and did some googling about smokejumpers and is anybody really surprised that i have more OCs?
Manaia, the ICT3, they/them, early forties. Co-parenting everyone with their pilot, Zenith (ey/em). They're 5'10" and built like a brick wall which tends to make people intimidated, but when they're not working, they're laid-back and like to laugh. But when someone tries to get fresh with their team... yeah, there's gonna be trouble. In their downtime, they're a photographer and pole dance for exercise (and to make people wonder if their poker face is really that good [it is]).
Waimarie, the spotter, she/her, mid twenties. Fashionista, gardener, and astronomer. She knows Nīkau's name as her buir <3 She always picks up a box of two-bite brownies on her way in to work, because while this girl should not be in the kitchen, she's got a need for baked goods. She can be bribed into doing about anything with macademia nut cookies. Likes to ride the bus on random routes to see more of the city. Has made many friends with old ladies on the bus, and on four separate occasions, has helped a kid with homework.
Nīkau, late thirties, he/they. He always has tea on hand and he never shares. Got his scar in a bar fight that he started by cold-cocking a homophobe. Thinks it's pretty cool. Also thinks fire puns are funny. He's always showing off pictures of his dog, a Boston Terrier named Rose Tyler. His three boyfriends look after her while he's at work. Doesn't actually own any of his shirts or jackets, they're all stolen from his boyfriends. The collar, on the other hand, was a gift from them. Has the TARDIS tattooed on the inside of his left wrist.
Christopher, mid thirties, he/him. A one-man survival team who always has a gallon bucket full of peanut butter cups on his desk. Likes some water with his ice cubes. Avid gamer. Face paint as self-expression. His car always smells like vanilla. Has four bearded dragons named Gandalf, Radagast, Alatar, and Pallando.
Tama, early thirties, he/him. Has an innate need to dive into literally any body of water even when explicitly told not to. Likely swimming somewhere right now. A year older than his brother, Tipene, and will never let him forget it. Car Guy™, who needs romance when you can spend three weeks disassembling a Ferrari engine and infodumping about pistons. Has dated two girls, both ended dramatically, might be time for him to realise he's into boys instead. Had several near-death experiences while cave diving and still required an intervention to stop. He still cliff dives.
Tipene, early thirties, it/its. Polyglot and polyamorous. Collects belt buckles and most of them are hideously gaudy tbh. Has a life-sized taxidermy shark hanging from the ceiling of the office and constantly scaring newbies with it. Always has the radio set to a classic country station. Stocks up on sour fruit candy like the apocalypse is coming. Would probably be fine in an actual apocalypse. Binges horror movies but can't watch anything where the dog dies. Consults the farmer's almanac daily and tracks how accurate it is in comparison to the local weather station. Has two full tattoo sleeves of indigenous birds, and it's a game to see if the team can spot all the birds on hiking trips.
Benjamin, late twenties, he/him. Takes heavily after his mother who died when he was born. His father remarried last year and he hates the new chick. Cotton candy is his main food group. Weaver and woodcarver who constantly gifts things to his friends or donates to charity auctions. Whenever someone asks to borrow a pencil, he takes out a jumbo pencil from his desk and pretends he doesn't have anything else. Flirts with everyone, nobody can tell when it's serious. Dramatically pulling off his sunglasses at least once a day. Only has one jacket that's red leather. Heavily tattooed from fingers to elbows but nowhere else. His lipstick is UV reactive and he's hooked up with half the city at some club or another.
Epoxy, late twenties, they/them. Transmasc swag cancelled out by inability to flirt. Seemingly never wears the same necklaces twice but they've kept the same shade of lipstick for the last ten years. Kiri is their best friend. Never seen without a backpack, but nobody is exactly sure what's in there. Constantly annoying everyone else by always having their earbuds in. Listens to Chappell Roan half the time and local indie artists the rest of the time. Hangs out at their other BFF Anahera's tattoo parlour on Thursdays because they have a crush on her. They got their name because they tried to wipe extra epoxy off on their hands on their first day and you can guess how that went.
Kiri, mid twenties, she/her. Everyone underestimates the skinny blond chick, which she uses to relentlessly fleece strangers at pool, darts, and contact sports. Highly competitive and will get in over her head if a dare or bet is offered. She's also an animal lover and keeps bringing home random insects and rodents that are considered pests around the airstrip. Constantly arguing with Chris about LOTR lore and drives him nuts talking about her Star Trek crossover fanfic bc they have wildly differing opinions on which hobbits would actually want to join Starfleet.
Oliver, nineteen, he/they. His cat is named Oreo and she's the love of his life, humans need not apply. He got the cat ear headband to match her. Goes all out on Halloween costumes every year. A friend to all insects, even the ones that bite him, they have their reasons. Designated remover of spiders from bathrooms. Keeps trying to grow flowers and failing miserably. Deeply invested in his neighbour's koi pond. Usually seen in a bomber jacket and jeans. Do not mention butterflies around him unless you're ready to hear more than you could ever remember. Keeps his Christmas lights up year-round. Has never thrown away a plastic bag in his life.
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Tagged By: @shroudkeeper left it open
Tagging: @pettyeti @finishing-touch | actually I'm gonna extend this to @icehearts to talk about someone other than Esca the Fresca | OPEN bc all of ya'll passed this around already
BASICS
Name: Vaste Valescoere / U'ralhana Odh / Osha Tayuun Nicknames: Rala (SIBLINGS ONLY) Age: 23 Nameday: 8th Sun of the 3rd Astral Moon | May 8th Race: Miqo'te | Half Sun Seeker ☀️ and Half Moon Keeper 🌙 Gender: Non-Binary Orientation: Lesbian Profession: Hunter (formerly), The Warrior of Light, Tea Farmer (later)
PHYSICAL ASPECTS
Hair: Blue / Black Eyes: Aqua end of Green Skin: Fair peach Tattoos/scars: Swooped line black tattoos underlining both eyes, horizontal scar across nose bridge from being hit by a Sundrake tail spike
FAMILY
Parents: U'odh Nunh (Father) and Oghii Tayuun (Mother, doesn't know her because she abandoned her baby) Siblings: U'rahtalo Odh (Older Sister), U'thulani Odh (Oldest Sister), U'nkanyezi Tia (Oldest Brother), U'ingwe Tia (Youngest Brother) - 1. Rahtalo is a phonetic name 2. Thulani is a Zulu imperative plural phrase meaning Be Quiet! which she got for being a loud baby among the loudest babies of her time until it stuck as a name, it shares the same root conjugate Thula that makes up the Ukhuthula in Yoshino's Sun name, which means Peace / Tranquil / Clam / Silence 3. Nkanyezi means Star, combining from Khanya (shine) and Unyezi (moonlight), due to the passing star shower when he was born 4. Ingwe means Leopard, for the spotted marks on his ear fur
Dad & Mom
Siblings shown in order: Nkanyezi, Ingwe, Rahtalo, Thulani
Grandparents: Doesn't know Moon Keeper grandparents, Sun Seeker grandparents are U'themba Nunh (Themba meaning Hope, Trust, have Faith in) and U'anele Bheka, (Anele means to be enough in quantity and is usually given as a name to the last child born, Bheka primarily means to look at something) both sets long dead In-laws and Other: Yunagi and Ihanami (Mother and Father in Law), Yhen'ir Ganajai (Older Cousin, Moon Keeper) Pets: Lewena gave him planters of a few different types and said 'These are your feelings' and he's been watering them ever since, a Coelacanth and a Shark both in tanks
SKILLS
Abilities: The power of No you | Limitless physical ability and inability to be physically hurt by anything that is not designed to kill Primals, Echo (immortality, aether reading/attack prediction, knowing all languages, can see into others pasts) , Aether Manipulation extending to 'eating' any living thing by reducing it back into raw aether, immunity to poison, disease, and being mind controlled or compelled, underwater breathing, extreme pain tolerance, unrestricted movement allowing free flowing movement on any surface that exists including air and water, can survive outer space and extreme environments made of aether, power bestowal to others, inherited the mastery of all magic, aiming weapons, axes, and sword shield fighting styles after absorbing all five Warriors of Darkness souls, Sharlayan Astrology healing techniques learned from Leveva Byrde Hobbies: Fishing (accredited member of the Fishing Guild and master fisherman), Gambling over card games like Triple Triad, Chocobo Racing, Eating big at a different restaurant every day, Collecting dildos interesting things to send to people she knows, Training, Walks until she gets lost on purpose
TRAITS
Most Positive Trait: Perseverance Most Negative Trait: Naivety
LIKES
Colors: Orange Smells: Coming Rain, Food, Perfume, Leather, Peeled Wood Textures: Leather, Cool Stone, Sand, Soil, Water, Linen, Yugiri's Scales Drinks: Tea, Water, Alcohol, Fruit Nectar
OTHER
Smokes: Never Drinks: Can drink others under the table and even to death Drugs: Never Mount Issuance: Alba the Chocobo, Alba is Italian for Dawn/Sunrise
Friends for life (his favorite food is apples)
Been Arrested: Was almost arrested several times in New Gridania until Mother Miounne intervened each time then put in a word (read: made threats and bribes) to stop it- because Wood Wailers had clocked her Moon Keeper traits and were ready to make some bullshit up to arrest her because they're racist, now as WoL she can do anything she wants without ever getting arrested because people are either afraid or worship her too much
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“You always come back worse for wear. Is this truly what you wish, Nem?” The goddess inquired softly as nimble fingers glided over rough and scar riddled skin. Her touch ever so soft, so delicate.
Nemesis just returned from some battle he raged on a neighbouring county and was victorious, despite the new wounds he received. Nothing stopped him. Not even the fair arguments the goddess gave him. The bloodlust he felt was too extreme to fight.
Gold eyes bore directly into emerald ones. “I can’t stop,” the man answered in a gruff tone. He needed to fight. It gave him an adrenaline rush and nothing felt better. He needed to chase the high. “If I don’t, other men will think I have grown weak. And they will scrounge up stronger warriors in mock confidence and rage upon this land! Would you rather that happen?”
“I rather you stop.” Sothis didn’t want to lose him. Either in battle or before he became too corrupted. There’s darkness that lingered, hovered over him like a storm cloud. She can’t convince him in the slightest, no matter how hard she tries. “I don’t want to lose you. It’s bad enough seeing you like this.” A finger trailed over a fresh wound on the man’s bare torso, and there’s a shark intake of breath.
A hand covered hers, to stop the movement. “I will not lose.” Something unreadable crossed Nemesis’ face, something that darkened topaz orbs before it faded. He was in great condition! A healthy man in his mid thirties and he felt ten years younger - especially around her. “Or I could stop. What is there yo keep others from coming here and killing off your children?”
An unthinkable thing yo say! Yet she felt some truth, a possibility, in those awful words. Her own expression darkened. “Don’t jinx it,” So hissed before she gave him a shove. She stood up. “Come. I will prepare food for you, now that you are in a better state. Speak ill again and I will not fox you next time.”
It was a threat but nemesis didn’t believe it. He laughed as he dismissed it entirely and got up, his laugh turning into a groan. There’s aches and soreness in all his body but he’s quick to move after her. Though he kept a foot or two behind her, watching her thick hair sway in time with her movements. And to look elsewhere.
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Life is not to be sought
Kise Ryota
Aomine Daiki
黒子のバスケ
While I was digging around thinking about how to go with the flow, how to be smooth and mercenary, how to stop hurting people, I found myself unable to learn how to love.
It seems that I have really become a mediocre adult.
And the angel to drink tonight
Aomine Ohtori sits at the window sill, smoking hard, his face reflected in the magnificent red fireworks over Las Vegas.
The man lying on the bed had a mermaid's line body, beautiful skin and a well-maintained face, with none of the features inherent in the youth of the thirties. Examining the sleeping baby's face, Aomori saw the ugly scars on his thighs and felt the humiliation and hideousness of fate in the night's light.
From heaven to hell, he had been in this rotten city for seven years.
From professional basketball player to street hustler, from rising star in basketball to death sentence for his sporting career after a car accident, he felt his life had long since withered away, or perhaps he had died long ago, along with the dreams and passions that had rubbed off on him.
It was a reality that he got into random fights, cheated on food and drink through flowery language, and spent nights gambling to make money off women …… things he used to be most unashamed of, and became a part of his life.
He exhaled smoke rings as if he was trying to suck all the nicotine into his lungs, and his bitter tongue lingered with the sweetness of the mad kiss he had just given, the taste of this man's body. The moment the holiday bell struck, he saw his faceless self in the glass window and pondered how this man, Ryota Hose, had recognised him.
"Well-" the man in the bed rolled over, revealing his bare back, rubbed his eyes and straightened up to ask, "What time is it? You're up early, Little Qingfeng ……"
"Twelve o'clock." Qingfeng replied as he threw the cigarette butt out of his hand, "It's Thanksgiving, and there's a show going on over on Long Street that's pretty lively."
"So thirsty ……"
Aomine Daikai handed the other man his water with a slight mockery, "Do you always sleep with people casually like that everywhere you go?"
Huangse's hand shook as he took the glass, as if he had been burned for a moment in the fire, and Aomine didn't miss a single expression on his face, then sneered, "And why is that? How could a rich man like you, covered in designer big money, look at me? You know this is Vegas, what kind of goods aren't there?"
"Let me guess, lost money? You're being watched by the gang and looking for a scapegoat? Or do you want to try something new and have a long goodbye? You don't work a lot every day and earn a lot of money just to see a joke, do you? You're lucky to have found this ……"
"You're the seniors I longed for ……"
"Longing? Hey hey, who are you? I can never remember the name of someone I've beaten, it's just basketball, for fun ……" Aomine suddenly paused, he couldn't go on, remembering the familiar whistle, the cheering crowd, and himself standing on the court laughing heartily.
Huangse looked at the face that had fallen into gloom, and his overly aggressive words lost their protective colour. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around the man, feeling the trembling and despair in his body in the darkness.
The words "because I like you" still didn't come out.
*Thanksgiving Day
Nietzsche said that gratitude is the health of the soul.
The two of them went out with ketchup-smeared bread, the Las Vegas Strip still showing signs of the people who had partied, and before going to buy sausages and sweet potatoes, Huangze dragged Aomori to pray.
"What's there to pray for?" Aomine said dismissively, "Praying for someone's bad luck to drop money on the street? Encouraging them to sign loan shark contracts to indulge in gambling and drugs? I survive on those, but God forbid."
"I just want little Aomori to be happy every day." Huangse smiled broadly, "Because we're lovers."
Aomine looked at Huangse like he was crazy and said, "God will cry when he hears that."
On the way back they met the float parade and the two walked into the alleyway clutching food and met the landlady at the corner.
The landlady was a local with a sharp eagle eye, and knowing a little about Aomine's work she said to Huangse without mercy, "Young people don't learn how to speculate all the time, you're his friend, aren't you? He's not a good person and will only hold you back."
Aomori clenched his fist involuntarily and said, "I'll pay the rent on time, please follow the agreement."
"Who do you think would want to rent a house to a vicious thug like you, that such a person would have friends ……" Malice and arrogance stirred the anger in Aomori's heart, he grabbed the landlord's collar and extended his iron fist, but was stopped from moving by a pair of hands, looking at the face of The anger in his heart came out like a volcanic eruption as he looked at Huangse, whose face was written with worry.
"Put away your disgusting sympathy and pity!" Aomori let go of his hand in hatred, "I never hit a woman!"
"Who do you think you are? I'm going to be grateful for running to me without permission after all these years? Don't dream! Where were you when I crawled out of the hospital with no money after my car accident? Where were you when I was sleeping on the streets and being laughed at by beggars? What do you know? You're the kind of gentry who should go to the slums and be cheated out of your life! Get out! You don't need to meddle here!"
An argument used up all his strength and he left in defiance, only to be greeted by a visit from the police two days later.
"Do you know Ryota Hwangse?" Seeing that he wasn't a local either, the officer gestured, "Yes, there was a fire two days ago and no one survived."
*fire
If it had to end in death.
The day I received the news, it was raining in the normally warm and dry Las Vegas.
A vague pain in the brain. The cause of the accident was a fire in a slum caused by holiday fireworks, and when the police came to the door all Aomori heard was "he rushed in to try to save a girl", "didn't make it out" and "died" After going to the police station to claim his belongings, Aomori did not go out again that day.
It was raining outside the window, the shirt he had worn at the previous day's meeting was still drying on the balcony, and the strong smell of disinfectant filled the relics. Aomine thought of the man who had cried himself into a wretched mess in the street when we reunited, of his late-night hugs and innocent smiles, and how perhaps this was the last good fortune of his life as Aomine Daikai.
Opening a bottle of brandy, the alcohol no longer enough to numb himself, he recalled the text message he had sent to Hwangse on Obon long ago, the two meeting up, Hwangse arriving panting from a club performance with a fox demon mask, remembering the bright red glint in the corners of the teenager's eyes in the clear yellow light, remembering the man jokingly saying he would give him a dream ……
Then Aomine actually fell asleep. He dreamed of Huangse, a dream in which his lover would never cry or be sad again, just smile and wave to him. Consciousness blurred, he only remembered that it was a very gentle and tender dream.
He woke up in the darkness and found that the corners of his eyes had long been cold.
--END--
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@soukokumychildren I didn't even know where to start with this one alskjdalkf but we (some of us in a discord server) got the idea from @/yebyyhfushi's killer whale Dazai and shark Chuuya arts and kinda really ran with it 😭
I'm gonna try to condense the headcanons we came up with them:
May or may not be shapeshifters capable of shifting into the real things, haven't decided this part
Killer whale!Dazai fighting the instinct to consume little shark!Chuuya because, hey, free food. And Chuuya's been separated from his pod, drifting all alone in the big, blue sea. FREE FOOD.
Shark!Chuuya's specifically a white-tipped reef shark; they're known for being sociable and living with others, but Chuuya's been separated from his pod and was held captive in a research facility until recently. The only known survivor so far, but now he's been forced to fend for himself
Dazai was born in and grew up in captivity, but was separated at a young age from his mother. Also ended up escaping, but he's exhibited attachment issues since then and struggles to form relationships with other killer whales, so he's a loner
Dazai's beached himself several times out of despair and loneliness, but good Samaritans always rehydrate him and push him back into the sea
(This was sort of a crack point but Fyodor being a fisherman who poaches sharks and killer whales for fins) and he's been hunting Dazai for a while now—Dazai has scars and recently-healed wounds from spears and being caught in nets.
But Dazai hates boats and ships and doesn't hesitate to headbutt them or make them spring leaks
Dazai's caught in an industrial-strength net one day, and Chuuya happens upon Dazai struggling for his life as the net's being slowly lifted and Chuuya tears him free with his sharp teeth
SO STARTS A VERY STRANGE KINSHIP BETWEEN THEM. Dazai constantly has to fight the instinct to eat Chuuya and Chuuya will just straight up dive into an underwater cave or camouflage himself in the sand to hide from Dazai
But sometimes they get along and Chuuya will hitch a ride along the underside of Dazai or latch onto his fins/tail and just drift along the current
Dazai couldn't bring himself to kill Chuuya, but now they rely on each other for survival; Chuuya struggling the most since he has to learn how to hunt on his own with Dazai's help. And of course Chuuya bugs him about all the scars on his body (scars from boats, fights, etc.)
They somehow figure out how to communicate to each other through mutual mannerisms. But Dazai will sometimes make clicking noises when he's feeling mischievous, and Chuuya just doesn't understand.
Chuuya has a little bandanna tangled around his fin after scavenging a shipwreck. He hasn't been able to get it off, so he just leaves it there for flair
oh yeah, we sketched art:
I spent like an hour having serious brainrot over a shark!Chuuya and killer whale!Dazai AU and I wish I was joking but I am dead serious
what am I gonna do with all this lore of them now
look, I watched March of the Penguins, I could conceivably cry over a fic of killer whale Dazai getting caught in a fishing net and fighting for his life trying to free himself from entanglement as fishers try to poach him and sharkChuuya comes and tears him free
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mmmmm thought dump about what the bsd mers look/act like ahead.
I think DAZAI is an eel type thing. fitting, in my opinion. slippery bastard. some of the most AWFUL looking teeth you have EVER seen in your ENTIRE LIFE. super long tail, much longer than you think he really has any right to have, and certainly long enough to wrap neatly around your little vessel, the strength of the appendage bringing you to a full stop. what? did you think you had permission to cross over HIS waters without paying the toll? silly, he'll have to teach you how show some proper respect to a creature such as him. (the toll is kisses and attention for as long as he decides he wants to hold you there) he's also a LAZY fishy. just kinda sits around on the bottom of the sea, hidden in his little cave dwelling, waiting for his food to come to him. hes the same way with you, as well. just kinda lays around bored on the rocks until he spots you. after that is kinda up to his whims. he might be nice and just wanna snuggle up (insert cuddlefish pun) or he could want to use his giant tail to fling you full force into the water and use you like a pool toy for the day. who knows. CHUUYA is a pretty standard Pretty Mermaid (I think hes got a green tail), at least on the surface. unlike dazais permanent monsters state, chuuyas horrible sharp teeth and claws and actually either retractable or entirely unnoticeable if hes got you stuck in one of his songs. despite his elegant appearance, he's an AGGRESSIVE hunter among sirens, only really outclassed by his sharky friend akutagawa (who mostly just hunts any creature that he sees, when chuuya and his ilk will opt for humans). speaking of AKUTAGAWA. shark! SHARP teeth. absolutely COVERED in scars from fights with other merpeople (that he ALWAYS WINS thank you very much) and overall is really only outdone by dazai in terms of how unsettling he looks. but also like sharks, he can actually be pretty docile when hes in the mood, even willing to let you pet his head if you bribe him with enough fish. I keep trying to come up with something interesting for FYODOR but my brain just screams FYODOR AS URSULA THE SEA WITCH and now I can't unsee it. imagine it. you see this outwardly beautiful merperson perched on the rocks with his many tentacles, beckoning you over (maybe even using his own singing spell to get you nice and relaxed). oh, dont mind all the appendages dear, sure he might look a bit frightening, but hes a nice fish, really! who could ever harm a poor little downtrodden human like you :( so soft and squishy and vulnerable like that, not him that's for sure! certainly, you have something you wish for? well he can help you! for a small fee.
- 🩹
oh my god i really wanted to get to this sooner but classes were So hectic im here now tho and ready to feast
cw: yandere characters, obsessive behavior, general mentions of consuming humans, sharp teeth/fangs/claws, mention of tentacles, jealousy
eel dazai agreed!! something. Not very appealing probably i'm thinking very beautiful colored scales though !!! actually about the lazing around thing dazai just doesn't need to put effort into hunting for food, there's always just some silly little something floating right into his waters and he can just eat away. he's not picky. now normally a human in his waters just means another meal, but you kind of grow on him, with your fascination and gullibility and sympathy. it helps that you're a lot smaller (he's huge okay) than him and you've got that strange sort of fragility humans have. something about the way you show your emotions so easily, the lack of claws and fangs, the soft grip when you touch him. you're too easy to like. he's super super super clingy and whiny (after the whole i-will-eat-you thing dies off a little. he doesn't stop threatening you but the chances of him acting on his impulses lessen considerably and he genuinely likes you by now) and gets jealous over everything. ask him about other mers and he might blow a fuse. if he had things his way (and if humans weren't so useless) he would just drag you down to his cave and happily stay there forever, but he needs to let you go back to your land-home and wait for you to return every day, for now. until he figures out a solution for that.
chuuya is not standard mermaid excuse you, he's gorgeous and the best in every aspect of his life. a green tail would go great with his hair right hmm i'll leave that up to your interpretation for now. but the thing about his claws being retractable! yes! he's good at hiding things like that, but not with his fangs. there was to be something that gives away his appearance, right? he's usually careful about his mouth when charming humans, but to his surprise, you're not at all taken by his appearance. even when he snarls, frustrated by your lack of reaction, you don't look disgusted, or frightened. just...unbothered. so you don't find him irresistible or terrifying? he'll disappear, swearing to win you over somehow.
i don't really have anything to add on to the akutagawa part i think you've got him spot on with the scars and the fighting everything he sees. he's actually really easy to handle if you just earn his trust with a lot of patience and resolve!! he's only super aggressive because he has to be to survive, but if you don't pose a threat, he'll have no reason to be like that with you.
uhm. so tentacles. i have a weird relationship with them in general so i won't be elaborating here!! i just don't see the appeal unfortunately they really. gross me out (i'm sorry i really can't even picture that without wanting to die) but sea witch fyodor sounds great he's kinda flexible like that he can really be anything i think siren, witch, sailor you name it he can do it
#IM SO SORRY I REALLY TRIED WRITING SOMETHING FOR FYODOR but i seriously cnat handle the thought it justhturefuhieurd#unrelated but when i was watching jjba and kakyoin's stand has like. tentacle things right it made me want to stop watching#I STUCK THROUGH AND I LOVE HIM but yea i cant im sorry#ask 🐟#anon 🐟#yandere bsd#bsd 🐟#mer au 🐟#dazai 🩹 🐟
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PURPLE YAM COOKIE X !READER WHO IS A MERMAID/MERMAN
┆ ° ♡ • ➵ ✩ ◛ °
“love is not only a word, it is a feeling we desire ourselves to”
requested by: @caeserfroggysalad
who: purple yam cookie
topics: fluff, some smut is mentioned ⚠️
plot: a reader who falls into the abyss of the underwater sea, unexpectedly finding true love from a merman who is destine to fall in love in need of comfort and change
author’s note:
hi there! am sorry that I have not been able to fulfill requests during the summer. this was one of them to begin with and I know I have another purple yam fic awaiting to be drafted. my summer got a little busy with going back to college and I’m expecting it to be a bit more hectic with the semester and transferring to a university and starting to plan for my long-term career. I haven’t seen much fanfics going around tumblr like it used to be ever since the cookie run kingdom fandom started to die down drastically. so this is putting in the effort of coming back to put something out there until I can get what needs to be done. in the mean time, I hope you enjoy this palooza love story dedicated to a very close friend of mine who talks literally about their self ship with purple yam a lot!
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
under the sea, below the oblivious layers of the ocean that navigates towards an underwater city made for mercookies to be discovered, you were pretty well-known. you were often looked at as the the top performer of best musical singer for the underwater sugar seashell club. you had pride in your job and you cherish every moment to gather and sing with your heart content by rallying the audience and to make them feel welcomed. you were a cookie with perfect complexion and charisma. you always had an eye for design when it comes to picking out tops other than coconut bras or sea stars, patched on your breast— therefore you had rather good intentions to everything. but not that you had bragged about it, right? at least thats what the mercookies think. you were a very-high end mermaid/merman with high expectations. you would pretend to brag about it to your fans and then brush it right off, as if fame isn’t everything to changing your identity or your pretty looks. sometimes, you wished to be a regular citizen, fitting right in to the crowded domain of busy fish that either have to peel off the barnacles, sweep up the kelp plants, guarding and protecting the underwater city and most importantly, keeping an eye above the waters. at least that was purple yam cookie’s job.
ahhh yess. a merman built with a bold and nutty flavor of aggression and a burning flame of integrity. this is a cookie who is not afraid to fight a shark because in morality, he is able to tame them as his pets and being his only friends. after all who has heard the phrase of “fish are friends, not food”, but with sharks? this is a merman who isn’t afraid of competition. To find his prey by hunting them down or even a mate to be the alpha to. purple yam is the defender and alpha lead to the shark community. his knowledge to speak and understand the shark language became natural to him— I mean after all, his tail is represented as a shark. born and imprinted with his burnt marks and even leaving scars all over his tender body, but as if he isn’t afraid to admit that he didn’t feel insecure. he wanted to prove to those that in the end, you are left with scars and bruises after a tense battle on the battlefield. for a woman at least it was different. this IS different.
after his duty of keeping patrol of the city with his sharks, an all cleared was signaled and retreated back to the herd. the sharks began to feast on leftover gummy shrimps and candy krill. yam was feasting on the same as well as it’s important to learn and be fully exposed to a shark’s taste of interest. meanwhile, a couple of mercookies going about their day were talking about the performance from last night of a cookie whose famous for their singing and songwriting truly becomes an inspiration to aspiring theatre acts and future performances where they will be displayed. all that purple yam could ever think about was famishing over his meal, instead of randomly hearing the two cookies talk about a famous mercookie would could brag about their famous career. he wasn’t into music in particular to begin with and just hearing someone who desires someone else’s own personal fame felt too overrated. “sounds GULLIBLE.” he scoffs with attitude as he continues to finish his meal.
15 mins in on their break. yam and the sharks were finish feasting. he had some errands he had to run, so he would leave the sharks behind to rest and train around the shoal. yam then eavesdrops into another group of merfolk, gathering to see tonight’s performance of the mermaid/merman that was going to be there. yam realizes that this was the exact same cookie that another duo was mentioning. the more he kept over hearing this particular, the more irritating it got. “AUGHH! What is WITH this COMMOTION?” he exclaims. the other cookies could hear him from near. he then decides to see the show for himself. pretending that having interest would change his mind. again, he wasn’t into huge taste like classical or jazz. unless it peeked his interest. the show was gathered in the gold sugar seashell music hall. this is where famous merfolk compose or sing. yam sits at least 8 feet away from the stage near the right corner. for him to blend in, it was a tough fit. the overlapping of conversations from left to right were curious about what could the famous mercookie sing tonight for this broadcast. the audience grew silent as the hall got dark. the stage lights flickered on and the crowd begins to applaud. the host of the show begins to announce tonight’s performance with the mercookie yam has heard from others previously. their name was “y/n”.
y/n reader pov:
tonight’s theme of color was brass gold. you were coated with the finest premium of fine gold. at least that what the designers would say. yes had on a gold and glitter coated seashell bra and a gold sequence skirt near where your ankles (in transition your tail fins) would be. hinted with silver-blue eye shadow and eye liner. you weren’t an expert for fixing up a contouring face, but you were a whole different cookie on stage. you began to perform one of the finest classical jazz pieces from your album. this one was dedicated to finding love in existence and hoping the right one will run into you. everything all articulated in flat notes. you were into your song and learn to manifest it. you were able to toggle a perfect cohesive audience, including purple yam cookie.
his eyes sparkled at the singing mercookie, decked with gold. in the eyes of a tiger shark, he was spotting on his new mate. you were a butterfly fish. so, seeing the intriguing details of your shiny scales and fins turned him on. he admired your eye color as it mesmerized underneath the lights. you dance, moved your hips gracefully as you finished the rest of your song.
the audience roars from amazement. clapping on to wish “y/n” a spectacular show. did this change purple yam’s pique of interest? the next day passes by and yam was busy once again on patrol with the sharks. he ended up seeing the mercookie who looked very familiar, but without all the glossy touch ups. either way, he was still interested. the mercookie was minding her day, shopping around the sea market, without anyone securing her safety. this was his big chance! yam becomes instantly distracted and sees that y/n drops a few things from their purse. a perfect moment to help— and mingle! yam hurries over to help y/n as their embarrassment grew.
“thank you.” y/n response in a soft voice.
“o-oh, it’s nothing. just a typical merman helping the citizens” he stutters.
“I don’t think I had anyone ever done such a thing for me, especially when it comes to being very popular— it sounds mediocre at least to me.” y/n felt like they wanted to hold back. the gloom in their eyes and it grabs yam’s attention.
“well it’s not like it was done intentionally…” he adds
2 months began to pass by as yam and y/n started to talk more and eventually started getting together, as y/n’s career became overwhelming for them, so they decided to take a break. holding back on their musical career may seem like it was putting an end on their fans. but it was best to keep their personal life and dating experience out of sight. until they were ready to head back to the sugar sea shell stage, everything could start over. yam had a hard time trying to learn the term “love” as if it just comes out of thin air, potentially absorbing the thought of how two fishes under the sea could wrap tails around together and make love. yam took his precautions as y/n wraps their arms around his warm tendered body. easy enough to turn someone on when pleasure starts to grab their attention, subconsciously. when it came to cuddling in bed and wrapping their arms (including their tail fins) around each other, the warmth of love became real. as yam puckers y/n, dragging his lips across their sweet sensitive body and tracing their body curves with his hand as y/n lets out a softly gasp.
y/n imagining a magical moment between them and purple yam cookie. purple yam taking advantage of them as he never felt this type of comfort. love never existed to him— as he grew up to hunt and fight like a predator. once you master the fundamentals of being a predator, soon, you will catch your prey. well, at least it should apply to finding your mate. was he really known to being the underwater city’s most reliable guard? they wondered if he grew some sort of affection towards his sharks to build a bond. they were glad that they spent their life differently because all it matters was that they both found themselves in a different position of things.
#cookie run kingdom#cookie run#cr kingdom#crk x reader#purple yam cookie#purple yam cookie x reader#cookie run smut#cookie run fanfic
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Magnolia Final Part
Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader
Word Count: 3.3k
Warnings: Mentions of blood and death
Summary: idk dude just read the other chapters first or this is gonna make no sense
A/n: I did this instead of studying for my finals, also it could probably use a neither round of editing but I was anxious to post it. And I really don't give a fuck if this is historically inacurate all research done for this was from Pirate of the Caribbean.
Part 1 Part 2
♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~
You considered the stars your friends, their predictability and reserve made them easy to get along with. You had been taught to read their language from your early days of ships and oceans. As a child, you would speak to them, whispering secrets from your bedroom window. Your young nights had been filled with time spent stretching from the top of your magnolia tree to try and grasp their beauty. Even now as you stared up at the heavens you wished to cradle them like priceless jewels, their wonder never faded. But you supposed their mystery is what made them so appealing, everyone wanted something they could never quite reach.
The news of your captured prince had spread like fire in a dry wind, the letters you had sent to Aldir and their neighboring kingdoms throwing many into action. Sirius’s kingdom was large, powerful, and merciless. Some wanted the prince for leverage, many others wanted blood; revenge driving them to empty treasuries and sharpen swords. At first, you had been sitting pretty, letters of bids coming to you at every stop you made. Eventually, prices got too high and kingdoms decided it would be easier to take than to pay.
Ash burned in the back of your throat, you stared at your feet as the second ship that week crumbled into the ocean. Its flames were heavy on your back, reflecting in the greys of the sea. A particularly large crack of the fire made the breath catch in your throat. Your fear of the element had persisted for years filling your nightmares with smoke and screams.
As the distance between you and the defeated ship lengthened your heart began to calm. The air was thick with moisture, purple clouds bruising the dull sky. The ocean was frothy, waves lapping tirelessly at the sides of your ship.
Your mind felt dizzy, the taste of blood still thick in your mouth. Two more men had been lost in the fight which had taken place just minutes ago. One flung into the ocean and the other struck by a bullet. That was six bodies that you had been forced to dump into the sea the past month.
You had to get rid of Sirius before more corpses were to be fed to the sharks. This had never been so strikingly obvious before yet, you hesitated. Nails dug into your palms, the voices in your head fighting a clamoring war. Your feelings were illegible, their messy colors smeared together in an uninterpretable painting. So you threw them away, ignoring the throb in your chest and taking a breath. Sirius was to be sold to the highest bidder and that was that. You felt your past’s grip on your throat loosening. There was only one way to get rid of what used to be, you had to kill it.
Sirius had never been so bewildered before. His life had been a book that was written a thousand times over. The prince falls in love, the queen doesn’t approve, the love runs off, the prince finds the love, and then happily ever after. But life wasn’t as sweet nor simple as a children’s story and this may be the first time that he had ever truly realized that. All it took was the prince to be tied in the love’s basement ready to be sold to his death.
Sirius woke with a start as metal clattered inches from his face. His heart pounded loudly in his ears as his breath slowly returned to his lungs. He stared at the plate which had woken him, it was piled higher than normal with two rolls dropped next to it. He peered up at the giver of this gift.
He recognized the small blonde as the one he had threatened a few weeks before, the fear he had seen in her eyes that moment now replaced with pity, bitter and soft like rotten fruit.
“I wanna talk.” She said plainly, toeing the plate towards him like a bribe, he supposed that’s exactly what it was.
Sirius sat up ignoring the hammer of his head. His hair stuck to his cheek, slick with sweat. The woman whose name he never learned dropped to a squat beside him, a small knife held in her hand. His eyes widened as it glinted in the small gas lamp hanging above his head.
“Relax.” She sighed cutting the rope that tethered his hands behind his back.
Sirius felt his shoulders groan in protest as they fell forward, his wrists aching and rubbed red. Hot pin pricks filled his fingers as he clenched and unclenched his fists.
When he looked back up Adrie was now seated in front of him, her legs crossed. She glanced down at the food and then back up at him, “You can eat if you agree to answer some questions.” Her demands were simple.
He let silence settle for just a moment, “Fine.” After all, what did he have to lose? His dignity? His pride? They had been sleeping with the fishes for ages.
She pushed the plate towards him, watching him quietly as he began to eat, “You don’t look like much of a prince to me.” She hummed after a moment.
Sirius swallowed, licking his lips, “Does anyone after two weeks locked in the bottom of a ship full of scum?"
Adrie cracked a smile, “I suppose not.”
She stared at him still, she was lying a bit. Years held prisoner couldn’t erase the royalty he was raised with, it stuck to him like wet stuck to water. Nothing and everything proved him a prince, you could take his crown but you could never take his title.
“How do you know y/n?”
Sirius was startled by the suddenness of the question but not remotely surprised it was asked, “She hasn’t told you?”
“I wouldn’t be asking if she had,” Adire responded, her tone was blunt.
He bit into a roll thoughtfully taking his time to chew slowly, she was patient, her blank expression, not faltering.
“I thought you were friends.” He mumbled with a full mouth.
Her jaw tightened, “Y/n doesn’t speak of her past.”
“So you’ve come to me for information?” Sirius said mild mockery in his voice.
“Obviously.”
He eyed the woman curiously, she was not what he had expected of your right hand man. Sirius smiled loosely, “You sure you wanna disobey Captain’s orders?”
“Start talking or I take the food and hang you by your ankles.”
Sirius huffed glancing between her and his food, “Fine, you win.”
“Good. Tell me everything.” She demanded.
Sirius felt his throat tighten around the potatoes he had swallowed, his mind ached with hazy memories of summer days and speeding hearts, “There isn’t much to tell.”
“You’re a bad lair.” Adire hummed.
Sirius sighed, eyes falling to the bright white scars which laced his hands. He wasn’t sure where else to start but the beginning. He told of a loud baker girl who snuck over the walls into his garden and brought him pastries and friendship. He continued with vague details, of growing up together with swords and stars, reliving each moment he shared.
He felt his words stiffen as he spoke of falling in love with you. Part of him felt like he was talking of someone completely different. Someone who had burnt up with her parents in a small bakery a million miles away. What was left, muffling cries above him, was a shell of that girl her soul replaced with seaweed and smoke. He pushed the thought away, swallowing it with the lump in his throat as he continued to speak of a proposal he regretted and the consequences of disobeying his mother.
The broken fairytale cut his tongue filling his mouth with a bitter taste. He attempted to wash it down with the rum his listener had brought to him but its flavor was just as bad, it's only redemption was the warmth that filled his stomach.
Adrie looked at him blankly, "I don't blame her for wanting you dead."
Sirius wished she had stayed silent.
"But I pity you, you don't deserve death."
He didn't look up and instead finished his drink, "Your pity means nothing to me."
She sighed standing to her feet, "I never thought it did."
When her boots disappeared up the ladder he let his cup drop to the ground, it rolled knocking into his heel as tears dripped from his chin.
By the time you had dropped anchor just off of Haran, the moisture had dropped from the air. Dry winds and clear skies greeted your crew.
Rowboats were dropped in the water quickly, the sun was setting fast and a night of cheap ale and cheaper women were in the forefront of many a man's heads.
You were tired, the happiness of your crewmates falling short at your feet. Exhaustion had replaced all anger and sadness you had harbored for the past weeks making your eyes grow dull as the bags beneath them. The satchel burned under your arms had a note you had written agreeing to the Yerith King’s price. You had singed your finger on the wax used to seal the envelope, it still throbbed a bit with the unsteady beat of your heart. You tried not to think about much on your way to land instead filling your head with that faint burn and fog of the setting sun.
Adrie watched as you played with the diamond strung around your neck, a new piece she had only seen in recent days. She assumed you had taken it from one of the ships which had recently burnt into the sea. The bright stone was so different from the rest of your jewelry she was surprised you wore it all. Obnoxious gems had never been your type.
She was wrong on this thought, large jewels used to be what you would stare at as you passed shop windows, wishing you had the money to clutch one in your hand. They used to be a dream and a wish, now they were just things you stole and sold to the highest bidder.
Sirius had been briefly told of the plans for the evening. Two men whom he had become somewhat accustomed to during his stay had tied him up. The knots were tighter than usual as they were to be gone for the night. In his usual nature, Sirius complained about the ache of his wrists and the cramps in his legs. His grievances went unheard and his company disappeared from sight. The boat was quiet within the hour, nothing but the creak of old boards and calls of gulls far above his head breaking the silence.
He drifted in and out of sleep for a few hours, time passing in its usual way, slowly. Finally, a clear thought came to Sirius’s head, he had the whole boat to himself. That meant there was no one to stop him from escaping his certain and quickly approaching death.
Sirius tried to twist his hands out of the rope for what must have been an hour and only resulted in drawing blood from his wrists. Switching tactics he began to slowly shuffle and roll around the cabin he was in, searching for anything that could cut rope. As the sun’s light began to fade his task was growing difficult. Just before he gave in to his exhaustion Sirius found a bent nail sticking about a centimeter out of the ladder that led to the upper deck. The next two hours were spent rubbing his binds against the dull metal until they finally snapped.
After a month of being held prisoner, freedom left him stunned. He stumbled up the ladder until he reached the ship’s deck. The warm breeze which washed over him felt like a gift from the gods. A smile stretched his aching cheeks and for the first time in a while Sirius Black let out a genuine laugh.
He quickly found a small boat which he could lower to the water. He could be miles away before the sun rose and you found his binds cut. Judging by the port you had stopped at he was only a few days' row from neutral lands. There he could gather himself and write for help. He was saved.
Sirius’s glee was cut short as he realized that he was missing one vital thing; you. The only reason he was out here in the first place was for you. He had spent years following rumors across the sea, he had given up his place as king, he had spent hundreds of thousands on supplies. But the truth was even if he hadn’t done all that, even if he had stumbled across you within a week and spent no more than ten doubloons he still wouldn’t leave this ship alive unless you were by his side.
Sirius cursed, slamming his fist into the deck. His eyes darted around in what felt like panic. He was trapped between your love and his life and while he had chosen the former weeks ago he had no way of securing it.
In the dark, a glint of light was seen. A crate of liquor stowed next to the captain’s quarters revealed itself to the pale moon. The man's mind buzzed, he realized quickly that he would need to act fast, the hours of the dark he had left must be well used.
The deal had been easy, one glance at the large gem and you had a buyer offering hundreds. You walked away with 400 doubloons knowing it was worth much more. Not that you cared, you had been hours from chucking the necklace into the sea.
It was late at night now, the golden light of pubs and brothels spilling onto the gravel road you walked. Your legs still felt weak, they were accustomed to the sway of boats on sloshing waves not the strange sturdiness of the ground. You hadn’t been able to sleep well on land since you had stepped off it, you had always opted for a swinging hammock over a still cot.
You swung your bag of coins round in circles as you made your way to the beach. The water was smooth save the ripple of waves drawn by the full moon. Sand glistened silver under your boots, the light crash of water on rocks echoing around you.
You had never intended to spend the full night on land, your crew was well aware of this fact and none would be surprised to find you gone in the morning. You shoved one of your beached row boats back into the water, splashing about ankle deep before leaping into it.
When you reached your ship, you sensed something was wrong immediately. The small voice which you tended to ignore was screaming in the back of your head. As you climbed onto the deck the strong scent of liquor overwhelmed you. You heard a soft splash and glanced down to look at the puddle you had stepped into. Swiping two fingers through the fluid and plopping them into your mouth you hummed. There was no mistaking the sharp taste of gin. You looked around to find the leak and instead locked eyes with a figure who stood about 20 meters in front of you.
“Sirius?” You asked though you already knew it was him, you didn’t think you would ever forget his face, even if it was obscured by the shadows of the moon.
He gapped at you, unsure of what to say.
You took a step closer and caught a glance of the bottle he held in his hand. Its thin neck was stuffed with a piece of cloth, the soft glow of a gas lamp flickering behind him. The second you realized what he had planned your gun was pointed at his chest.
“Drop the bottle Black.” you hissed with a steady voice despite the fact that your gun was rattling in your hands. Your thoughts were now fogged with fear, plagued by smoke and flames.
Sirius had suddenly found his voice, “I know you’re not stupid enough to fire that. One spark and we’ll both go up in flames.”
Your breaths quickened, vision blurring as tears welled in your eyes. “Why are you doing this?” You croaked. “Why do you want to ruin everything I’ve built for myself?”
“I’m not leaving without you y/n.” He shouted, “I can’t live without you. Just come with me. Please. Just come with me and it will all be fine.”
You shook your head, “No.”
“Please, please! I need you y/n, I can’t go back without you!” He begged, snatching the lamp from behind him, “I won’t be able to live.”
It was in that moment that you understood he was just as desperate as you, just as lost and hopeless. You dropped your gun to your side, tears sliding slowly down your cheeks. Your throat tightened holding back a sob, “Okay.” You said with a broken voice.
Sirius cracked a small smile, “I knew it.” He sighed, “I knew you still loved me.” Setting down the lamp he opened his arms walking towards you. You met him halfway burying your face into his rough jacket.
“God I missed you y/n,” he whispered as you slipped a knife from under your sleeve.
“I’m so sorry Siri.” You mumbled in response before plunging the blade into his back.
You held him as he collapsed forward, choking back on his own blood. You had begun to sob, hand still clutching the hilt of the blade which was lodged into him. Eventually his weight became too much to bear and you both fell to the ground. Sirius rolled off next to you, his hand still clasped around your own. The two of you started up at the stars listening as his breaths slowed. Just before they stopped completely you felt a small squeeze of your hand and for just a moment you saw the soft pink of a petal floating towards you.
You weren't sure how long you lay there, staring up at the sky but it was long enough for you to finally realize that you were the villain of your story. It was an odd thing to recognize considering in all of the books you had carried as a child you took the place of the protagonist; the one who swung the sword to save the kingdom You had always been the one to end your life with a happily ever after.
Now you had realized that you had never been a hero. You had spent your life as a villain in the making, each step you had taken leading you closer and closer to your undeniable fate of evil. You had your chance to be the princess trapped in the tower, but you had ignored the prince and now took the shape of a witch. A witch who stole and killed and burned all that she hated. Some had to do it after all, we can’t all be heroes. There is no story without a villain, at least not one worth reading.
As much as the small baker girl who rested amongst the magnolia tree would have hated you, the woman you saw when you looked in the mirror was okay with who you had become. And if she was okay with it, then why did it matter what the past would have thought? You had been running from it for years and now you would never have to again. Because now your past ran from you.
taglist:
@april-showers-and-flowers @fleurmoon @chaosinparadise @re-zerohora @pregnant-piggy @approved-by-dentists @theweirdobella @fific7 @whitewashedghanianlol @artemis1orion @justmesadgirl @bberree @songforhema @wangmangagavroche @evyiione @atomicpunkrock @fairywriter-oracle @moon-zodiac @secretsofageek @accio-rogers-blog @roslea @k3nz-doodl3 @theseuscmander @sleepingalaska @chloe-geoghegan1 @obsessedwithrandomthings-blog @coldlilheart @suseptiable-bur-siriusexual @inglorious-imagines @the-natureofme @trickylittlewitch @layaa-layaaa @teheharrypotter @sarcasticallywitty15 @rosieweasleyy @dracosgoodgirl @inglourious-imagines
so many of u changed ur urls so if I have the wrong person tagged or the wrong username let me know
Masterlist
#harry potter fandom#harry potter imagines#harry potter imagine#harry potter fanfiction#harry potter fanfics#sirius black imagines#sirius black x reader#sirius black#sirius black x oc#sirius black imagine#young marauders#harry potter marauders#marauders era#marauders fanfiction#marauders x you#marauders x reader#marauders imagines#marauders imagine#marauders era fic#marauders#harry potter au#sirius x oc#sirius and regulus#sirius#magnolia#harry potter#harry potter x you#harry potter x reader#harry potter x y/n#fem!reader
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Reveal and Context: Which of these Noodle Incidents is a lie and isn't actually a thing that happened to me or a fact about me?
I’ve broken my nose seven times since I was six years old - TRUE!
Age six, I fell face-first onto a metal carpet divider. Age eight, I fell face-first onto an airport floor. Age thirteen, someone accidentally slammed a swing door into my face. Age fourteen, I walked into a telephone pole. Age fifteen, my high school bully swung a bag containing her hockey shoes into my face. Age sixteen, the same girl punched me in the face. And finally, age seventeen, I tripped in a pothole and landed face-first on a lamppost.
I never learned how to peel an orange - TRUE!
I don’t eat oranges or orange-adjacent fruit because when I was five years old the lunchroom monitor stood over me and wouldn’t let me get up until I ate everything on my tray - lasagne, a pot of jell-o, and an orange. The textures of all three foods still trigger memories of shame and disgust vivid enough to make me start dry-heaving and as a result I simply never learned how to peel oranges. Still don’t know how to.
I once used a lecturer’s pointer stick to beat the shit out of a military cadet - TRUE!
I was fourteen, and he was my best friend’s first boyfriend (he was sixteen, so two years older than us). He cheated on her with a female cadet and only broke up with my friend at his side-piece’s insistence. My friend was devastated (if I’m remembering correctly, her grandmother had passed away shortly before the breakup, so it was a double whammy) and at fourteen I was a freakishly-tall pointy-elbowed vessel of puberty-fueled rage, so I borrowed my mother’s pointer stick (she was a lecturer of Communication Design at the School of Art), cornered the boy during lunch break, and proceeded to deliver ‘a damn good thrashing’, to quote Basil Fawlty. He probably could have fought me off, but I think he kind of knew he deserved it. He had the nerve to hit on me via Messenger a year later, at which point I warned him that next time it would be my hockey stick.
One time I knocked over my chemistry teacher with a six foot beach ball - TRUE!
It was at a Bowling For Soup concert, and they were fronted by the Aquabats, who like to fling giant inflatable beach balls (and inflatable pizza slices, and inflatable sharks, and inflatable crocodiles) into the audience during their set. I punted a beach ball a little too enthusiastically, sending it into the back of the woman standing in front of me, and when she got to her feet I realised she was my chemistry teacher. She was a very nice teacher, so it wasn’t, like, some kind of Revenge Moment. As far as I know, she still doesn’t know it was me that knocked her over.
I’ve accidentally set fire to my own eyebrows twice - TRUE!
Once by forgetting to put my goggles on before leaning over a bunsen burner during a chemistry experiment, and once because my high school bully (she of the hockey shoes and the punching) thought it would be funny to shove the back of my head while I was trying to unjam the spark wheel on a cigarette lighter. There was an incident about a year later involving fake moustaches and spirit gum that left me with one eyebrow permanently shorter than the other, thanks to the scar tissue meaning the hair wouldn’t grow back.
I once drunkenly tried to fight an animatronic T-rex at a museum - TRUE!
Not much to say here. I was eighteen and very drunk in the middle of London with no adult supervision. People think I’m a lightweight because it doesn’t take much alcohol for me to behave stupidly, but actually it’s more that I’m just generally closer to behaving stupidly than most people are. Previously during this outing, I had also reenacted the Speaking Whale scene from Finding Nemo in the Mammal Hall (with the blue whale sculpture), and had also cried over a very nice fossil where you could see the unborn foetuses inside a pregnant Icthysaur’s womb.
I tried to swat a moth with a croquet mallet and put a hole in my bedroom wall - FALSE!
In the defence of everyone who just automatically assumed that this one was true, it does sound like something I would do. Actually, even my own mother, who I live with, didn’t realise that this one was a lie, which says a lot about the kind of person I am, because I only acquired a croquet mallet a few months ago. I’m twenty-three.
I eat kiwi fruit the way you’d eat a pear or an apple. skin and all - TRUE!
It started as something I did in high school because I was trying to eat more fruit and didn’t want to be stuck with a kiwi peel when there was no bin around, but, uh, you know that Rule about fetish jokes? How you shouldn’t spend more than thirty minutes on one because at 30:01 the exposure becomes lethal and the fetish becomes unironic? Well, this isn’t a fetish, but I wound up eating it often enough that I started enjoying the taste of the peel and as such will eat it whole even if there is a bin available. And apparently I’m not alone in enjoying the taste! My TA also eats the peel, as does at least one of my students.
I won a ‘Funniest Injury’ award in college for slamming my elbow in a wardrobe - TRUE!
Everyone who voted for this one as the lie - note that I didn’t say it was the funniest injury I’ve ever gotten, just that I won an award for receiving the funniest injury out of everyone on my college course. The wardrobe in question has a sliding door, said door got stuck on a drawer that was slightly sticking out, and while trying to yank the door closed I unknowingly nudged the drawer shut with my knee. I passed out from the pain for about ten seconds, but was mostly fine until three weeks later during a BodyCon class where I tried to hold a plank pose, heard a clicking noise, and then had the deeply unpleasant experience of my injured elbow collapsing and depositing me face-first onto the sweaty floor of a dance studio.
I’ve accidentally flashed my underwear to a busy street in London’s West End - TRUE!
Different trip from the one where I drunkenly tried to fight an animatronic T-rex, though. It was a school trip when I was seventeen years old, we were trying to do a ‘Trip To London’ group photo, and decided to even out the heights by having a bunch of us stand on a low wall. Long story short, a curved capstone + a very short skirt + dyspraxia are basically a recipe for disaster. Fortunately my ass was pointed away from the group, so no one I actually knew unexpectedly learned what my undergarments looked like that day.
I have tinnitus from standing too close to the speakers at a MARINA concert - TRUE!
Mostly worth it, though. MARINA was excellent, and we got a front-row view of Bubblegum Bitch. However, I also have ADHD-based auditory processing disorder, as well as eczema damage in one ear, so occasionally I do regret not bringing earplugs with me that day.
I once had to be held back from throwing a 2kg ham joint at a pensioner - TRUE!
I used to work on a supermarket deli counter; an eighty-year-old woman demanded to know where the peppercorn sauce was, and when I gave verbal directions instead of leaving the counter to physically fetch it for her, proceeded to call me a word that twenty years ago was often used as a synonym for ‘dumbass’ but nowadays is rightfully considered deeply offensive. I had a rare moment of forethought that ‘stabbing a customer is a bad idea’ and was actively reaching for the nearest pork leg to use as a projectile when my coworker Jamie (a woman with the patience of a saint) casually pulled me back by the strings of my apron and politely informed the woman that speaking to staff like that was against store policy.
Thanks for participating, folks! I’ve enjoyed reading the guesses in the tags (and the guesses some of my discord mutuals made in various servers)! That’s all for now on this month’s Cursed Coco Lore segment!
Okay, so @theladyfae and @swxxtcidxr have convinced me that this would be a hilarious idea so here you all go:
There we go. Eleven of these statements are true. You guys have one week to guess which one is a lie. Have fun!
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[This fanfiction takes place in an AU that reimagines Minecraft in a Dungeons and Dragons Setting! I hope you enjoy!]
It was happening again. Everyone else in the island seemed to have found their so-called soulmates and Scar was left all alone just like last time. Had his soulmate really rejected him so early on? He knew he was clumsy and had a tendency to get injured, but he wasn't all bad! He had magic, something most other competitors couldn't fathom besides just a few tricks! He was a prince too and half a shark! Sharks were cool, weren't they? He could protect them- maybe. He wasn't good at actual fighting despite being large and muscular. Those were mostly just for show. But intimidation was still a tactic!
"No matter," he muttered to himself and wheeled through the forest. If he wanted to survive, he would need to start gathering resources and make a base. He would win, even if alone.
. . .
While exploring and looking for a mine to gather materials and a place to create a base, Scar came across the most amazing finding in the world: Giant Jellies! There were over a dozen of them rummaging through the land in search of what was likely food. Now, Scar had had cats ever since he first came to the surface, but never ones these big! Maybe he wouldn't need a soulmate after all.
. . .
It took him an entire night to gather enough resources to start on a base. The great white shark merman was exhausted by the end. No doubt, this was a task better suited for two, if not for their help, for the distraction of having someone to speak to.
Shaking away his thoughts, Scar made his way outside the mine. In the distance he could see the start of a base, which was curious. He was pretty far away from all the others since he opted to make a base near the giant cats in the island. Curious, he wheeled towards it.
Behind the spiky walls, barely illuminated was a short aasimar with colorful wings, dirty blonde hair and in a red sweater. "Well, hello there!"
Grian jumped, having clearly not expected someone there so late or maybe so early. It was adorable how his wings fluttered with distress, "how-"
"Say, Grian, you wouldn't have any fish or meat with you by any chance, would you?"
"N-no, but if you are hungry I can get you some bread."
"No, no, it's not for me! It's for my true soulmates! I will be living with the Jellies!"
"The Jellies?" Grian's black eyes blinked.
"Yup! The big cats that live not too far from here!"
"Scar, those are not giant cats! That's a pack of saber tooth tigers! They will eat you alive!"
"Oh, only if they are hungry, you know how grumpy cats can be when they are hungry! But if you feed them and give them lots of love they can be the best companions in the world!"
Grian put his hands together and inhaled, "you are insane, you know that? Actually insane! Do you have no regard towards your ACTUAL soul mate?!"
"The Jellies are my soulmate and if I had any other soulmate, maybe they would deserve for us to get devoured considering that they haven't even bothered to say hi."
"Scar…"
"That is a joke, Grian! Trust me, I'm a cat expert. I know what I'm doing!"
Grian stared at him for a few moments and then sighed, "ok, listen, I will go there with you, ok? Just- wait until I'm done with the walls and I will come, but promise you won't try anything until then, ok?"
"Yeah, of course! You've got a Scar word!" One Scar had no intention of keeping with the fingers crossed behind his back.
. . .
After leaving Grian's base, Scar was lucky enough to find a nearby river brimming with life. While he wasn't the most skilled person on land, Scar was an absolute ace when it came to swimming. When he jumped inside, the fish swam deeper into the water, a smart strategy to deal with surface dwellers, but a useless one against an amphibious apex predator such as himself. They stood no chance.
After several hours fishing, with the occasional break for a snack because fish were delicious, Scar headed to where he had first encountered the Jellies while looking for his soulmate. They were all asleep together, some cuddling in what had to be one of the cutest scenes he had ever seen. They even had babies. He must have gasped a little too loudly, because one of the animals shifted and opened its eyes. Upon seeing Scar, it bared its teeth and stood up slowly, snarling, ready to pounce. The others began getting up as well.
"No, hey, hey, it's ok, I mean no harm!" He assured it and reached inside his bag of holding. He pulled a large fish from inside and tossed it to the beast, "see? I'm a friend! I brought food to all of you!" He tossed more fishes to each of the animals surrounding him. They sniffed the offerings before happily devouring them. He had noticed they seemed rather skinny, so they more than welcomed the meal.
Scar smiled, continuing to feed them until another one of the giant cats approached him. This one was larger than the others and was side-eyeing him. The creature larger than two lions continued forward, enough so to make the merman swallow. He knew she could easily overpower him if she wanted. After a few uncomfortably long moments, she finally decided to eat as well. Once all of them were finished, they all laid down again and went back to sleep, seemingly unbothered by his presence. That made Scar smile.
Finally, somewhere he was welcomed to.
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