#He did terrible things the list would be longer than this... D I don't want to excuse any of it...

[givemeasword-callmequeen]

I feel some sympathy for Aegon. Doesn't mean I support him.... But I feel sorry for him.

I feel sorry for the boy that run away when he learned that his father died.

I feel sorry for the boy that never wanted to be king & would have left the continent & everything behind.

I feel sorry for the boy who never feeled like he is enough.

I feel sorry for the boy who knew his own father never wanted him to be king.

I feel sorry for the boy who feels like nothing could please his mohher.

I feel sorry for the boy who lost his son in an terrible way.

I feel sorry for the boy who feels useless.

I feel sorry for the boy got burned by his own brother.

I feel sorry for the boy that lost his dragon.

I feel sorry for him.

[tenshinokorin]

TnK's Trigun Fic Listing

Ok now that I've got 15 fics out for Trigun (so far) and at least a couple of those are upwards of 20K and some of them are sequels and followups and ongoing, I thought maybe I should do a proper list of things, to make it easier for people who want to read in some kind of order. I'm terrible about talking up my own work but this is also for my own reference so that's fine, right? ^^; All fics are Vashwood-centric (I will get to Nai in a minute I have a backlog) and ratings vary from Gen to Explicit, though all are intended for an adult audience. This list is complete as of September '23, I will update it periodically as needed! 

NB: I'm lucky enough to have gotten fanart for some of these and sometime when my head is not full of mud I'll go in and add links to those where I can. (Or please drop a link in the replies if you are one of the wonderful artists in question!) 

THE BIG THREE STORYLINES: 

Someday Out of the Blue & I Believe in the Kingdom Come

Trigun '98 canon. Reincarnation fic. The first one is a story I started writing over 20 years ago and quit after a chapter because I was just too heartbroken (and did not know it, but was also too young). Picked it up and finished it this April (2023) after Stampede clobbered me and I fell off the "we don't talk about wolfwood" wagon. The second story is a direct sequel to tie up some loose ends from the first one, and also to indulge my need for a proper happy ending. (I think a lot of folks don't realize Someday has a sequel but it does!!) 

Black is the Color and Mysterious Ways

Trimax Canon. Resurrection/Fix-it/Angstmance with a much shorter, sillier, smuttier epilogue. Three years after the end of Trigun Maximum, Vash is having some trouble laying his ghosts to rest. (You may have seen this incredible artwork which has gotten around a bit and boosts the story better than any summary of mine possibly could.) Weird things happened when I was writing this, I don't mind telling you. Mysterious Ways was mostly an excuse to explore some of the more interesting concepts brought up by the first one, but saying anything more would be spoilery. 

Eyes of the Storm

(Mostly) Trimax canon. Cryptid Vash AU, slowburn romance, ongoing. When Nicholas D. Wolfwood gets roped into being the new caretaker for the now-abandoned orphanage where he spent his childhood, he soon finds out that his own hidden memories are not the only thing haunting him. (What the fuck is a Typhoon?) Wolfwood, Vash, Livio, Elendira, et al. This is the one currently in progress at six chapters out of ??. Pretty SFW so far BUT NOT FOR MUCH LONGER CAVEAT LECTOR. 

List continues with standalone and shorter fics below the cut!

Honeymoon

Generic Trimax/98 setting. Plant Heat, Wingfic, Tentacle Fic, What the fuck is Hay Fever. Wolfwood offers to help Vash out with a personal problem and gets a little more than he bargained for. 

Strange Powers

Generic Trimax/98 setting, comedy/smut/potato jokes/fisting with a loaded prosthetic. What if Vash and Wolfwood (accidentally) got really, really hella high? 

Hurricane

Trigun '98 Canon. 

Vash: Make money? As a priest?

WW: Well. *mysteriously* Not only that. 

Vash: (oh my gosh he's a prostitute)

Shortfic. Wolfwood tries to figure out how to offer his services to someone he doesn't really want to be a paying customer. Short and smutty while also demolishing Wolfwood's professional boundaries.

Skin Tight

Generic Trimax/98 setting. The Infamous Red Dress. PWP, Wolfwood needs to be in the Vash Sensory Deprivation Tank, Vash in high heels, the dress gave its life for this fic you should read it and honor its sacrifice. Look. This is just porn, guys. You want the porny fic? This is the porny fic. (just kidding most of them are porny fics but this one is especially so.) 

Secondhand Secrets

Generic Trimax/98 setting. Introspective/Vignette/Wolfwood POV. Vash's artificial arm always moves in his sleep, and Wolfwood wonders what he's looking for.

Personal Jesus

Badlands Rumble canon (post-film), Wolfwood has poor emotional coping strategies, hurt/comfort (Wolfwood provides both), first-time. That red hotel minifridge never stood a chance. 

A Fool From Any Direction

Trigun '98 Vash's weird horny schtick is a front, and self-respect doesn't save lives. Which is too bad because when Wolfwood finds out what Vash is planning next he's gonna kill him. 

Benediction

Trimax but could also be '98; Sometimes being a hero is not all it's cracked up to be. Or maybe Vash is the one cracking up. Hurt/Comfort, Wound Care & Bible Quotes, Noman's Land is a bitch of a planet. Shortfic, feels, non-explicit/no sex. 

A Bit of a Tight Spot

Generic Trimax/98 setting. Costume Porn, PWP, No corsets were harmed in the making of this fic. I feel like this one gets missed a lot which is MADDENING because you guys. WOLFWOOD'S DOUBLE Ds IN A CORSET. And like, in a gender euphoria way, not in a comedy drag kind of way (though comedy drag does make a small appearance). I don't know how the good minister tightlaced in cuban stockings while giving Vash a blowjob in front of a mirror in the attic of a whorehouse can get so often overlooked, maybe my title or summary is lacking, but it's one of the hottest things I've ever written and its engagement is just in the basement? When (emphatic baffled hand motions to Nicholas D. Wolfwood wearing a garter like a thigh-holster). Anyway. 

The Quick and the Bed

Trigun '98 Comedy, Romance, First Time. The single bed trope. Drunk Idiocy. Wolfwood's vows are in serious danger. (Wolfwood does not have vows.) Readers have let me know that they find this one amusing. Roommates of readers have sent me threats of bodily harm due to badly-stifled hysterical laughter at 3am. 

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW MORE STORIES WILL BE ADDED AS THEY OCCUR!

SMALL DISCLAIMER: I'm a full-time working writer and my fanfic is something I give away for free out of love. Please don't copy, alter, plagiarize, feed to AI in any form, fold, spindle, or mutilate. I'm not in the market for concrit, but if you like my stories please feel free to leave me a comment/kudo, download/print/fanbind for personal use, or let other readers know!

[quipxotic]

Spoilers for Campaign 3, in particular Episode 68, below...

Who could Bell's Hells call on for help at the Malleus Key? Here's a running list of some of the options, although how likely any of the people are to give aid is still up in the air.

Planerider Ryn - If she's alive and no longer a statue you know she'd be there.

Any remaining members of the Grim Verity - They're mostly academics, not fighters, which is why both the Ruby Vanguard and the Judicators/forces of Vasselheim so easily whittled them down. Still, there may be more out there if BH could figure out how to contact them.

"D" - Seems like they're going to find them anyway, so we'll see what they have to offer.

Jiana Hexum - Always a dicey proposition, first of all because Hexum (while a wonderful villain who I hope we see again) is a terrible person who enjoys holding power over others and making them do things they otherwise wouldn't. I'd hate to see what she'd ask of BH, more specifically Ashton and FCG, if they do go to her for help. Plus they don't know if Hexum was just hired to do work for Paragon's Call/Ruby Vanguard or if she believes in their cause.

The Green Seekers - Gus and Olly are more detectives than soldiers but it's all hands on deck right now.

House Lumas and Oshad Breshio - I'm sure Ela would love to bring some justice to the people who murdered her sons and the Anger would probably like another shot at them too.

Orlana Seshadri - One of the things I most wish BH had done while back in Jrusar was talk to Madame Seshadri. I'm not sure how much power the Chandei Quorum could bring to the fight, but they at least ought to know what's going on practically on their doorstep.

Ira Wendagoth - Like Hexum, this one is tricky. Ira's powerful and can be an ally, but he's fundamentally untrustworthy and will betray them one day. But if BH can survive this event without that or a TPK, they can worry about that eventual betrayal later.

The Verdict - Yeah maybe they still have beef with BH, but the team did heal them before they eventually beat them to the prize they were all after. Maybe that little bit of kindness counts for something?

The Calloways - I'm not sure how much help Ollie would be, but Birdy is no slouch in a fight and they've both got multiple reasons for trying to stop what's going on at the key.

Imahara Joe - I'll admit part of my reason for putting him on this list is just because I want more of Joe, who is a delight. He wouldn't be able to help them fight, but if they need tech he's the guy.

All-Minds-Burn - I'm not sure how much help Justi Pross and the gang could be outside of Bassuras or if they'd even want to pick a side in what's going on, but they'd be able to take it to whatever is left of the Paragon's Call, so maybe?

Grandma Morri - She would probably be helping already if travel and communication between the planes weren't part of the magic that got borked due to the solstice. Still, if there is a way, always count on Nana.

Delilah Briarwood - I mean, what could go wrong? I really hope it doesn't come to this, because if it does and they survive the battle on the moon or at the key, then they'll eventually have to fight her and possibly Vox Machina...and nothing good can come from any of that.

The Gorgynei - They'd probably be reluctant to leave the Gloomed Jungles and expose both their existence and their number, but this is a desperate situation. Bonus! Matt might have to voice Manad and Teven Klask in a scene with Fearne, Ashton, and Chetney and wouldn't that be an awkward delight?!

FRIDA, Deanna, and Prism - Get the Lore-sonists on the case! (This is HIGHLY unlikely, but we can dream.)

The Diarchy of Uthodurn - Team Wildemount promised to report back and never did. And while the rulers and the city may be a long, LONG way from the fight, they should have some sort of force to send and quite a few reasons to fight Ludinus.

[magistralucis]

I plan to read Desiderata but I don't know a thing about Rammstein. What should I know before diving in?

That depends very heavily on what about Rammstein would interest you.

I’ll be honest, anon, Desiderata is not the best story to start with if you’re completely new to R+. The story assumes a familiarity with the band’s history, as well as 1980s East German politics, and depicts both with terms and viewpoints familiar at the time. It’s not very accessible if you want to read a story about Rammstein, I’m afraid, it is very much a period piece.

That said, I can talk a little about what made me write Desiderata; if you’re interested in any of those topics, you’re probably good to go. I will also add some pointers as to how to begin a journey into Rammstein in general. This will be a very long post beneath the cut.

-------------

1) I’m interested in life during the GDR. I’m especially interested in how ordinary East Germans lived, down to what they ate, the kinds of people they’d meet, where they could travel to for the holidays. What people take for everyday occurrences are anything but outside of their homes. Most of Desiderata takes place in the pre- and early-Rammstein era (1985-1995), when the band members didn’t know they were going to get so big, nor what would happen after the reunification of Germany. I wanted to depict their era realistically. Desiderata is a written painting of that time.

2) I wanted to write on the anti-authoritarian character. To distill a long and complex history down, Rammstein has their origins in Ostpunk, and many of its band members spent their early life resisting the government in one way or another. They didn’t all do this in the same way, nor always with the conscious desire to stick it to the government. Sometimes they paid for it anyway. In Richard’s case, with terrible consequences, as his arrest and detainment by the Stasi finally made him flee the country. Desiderata is written in Richard’s POV and includes a sequence on what might have occurred during this time, as well as an analysis of his general psyche on the years leading up to that arrest. Desiderata’s account relies heavily on actual interviews Richard has done, as well as published Rammstein material, so if you’re interested in a character study of this sort you might like it.

3) I did not want to depict the above through the patronizing lens commonly found in Western media. It’s easy to fall into the trap of binary opposites when you’re writing about stuff like this: Richard was oppressed by the GDR so he must hate everything about the GDR, and/or furthermore, the GDR must have been evil. It’s the other way around if you’re approaching this from an anti-capitalist lens: if the East Germans had known the ‘freedom’ which lay beyond the wall was actually mid-stage capitalism, and if they’d known how badly that shit would break down in a couple of decades, they wouldn’t have wanted it.

Now I do not know what the objectively correct political position is here. But when you’re writing a character study of Richard, it shouldn’t be either of those. It’s definitely not how Rammstein looks at their past, judging by the interviews they’ve given and the books they’ve published; not even Richard has such a black-and-white approach to the life he led. It’s easy to forget that when you’re writing a fic, or even an article which tries to lean on the ‘facts’; one’s subconscious biases inform how they process facts, and I want to do better than that. I’ve fallen into that morality trap before because I didn’t know any better, and as a result I wrote some really bad stories, and I am ashamed of that. Rammstein have led a rich and complicated life with ups and downs. Many of them sincerely loved the GDR, the ones who didn’t still saw plenty of self-admitted good in it. If you would like to bask in my efforts at honesty, as fragmented as it is (for in the end, I am not from the GDR), Desiderata is the best I’ve done to this date.

4) Some good old Tillchard. Yes, I admit it, Desiderata is also a pairing exercise. ‘Tillchard’ is the shorthand for the pairing between Till (vocal) and Richard (lead guitarist); they are longtime friends in real life, and they share a trust between them seldom paralleled by anyone else in the band, imo. They’ve lived together for a time, they raised their daughters together, they began their foray into music in general while being aware of each other. They have duets together for God’s sake. I’ve been digging Tillchard for ten years so I need to stop before this becomes a longer essay than it should be, but long story short, if this becomes the first pairing you’re interested in I’d recommend adding Desiderata to the fanfic pile.

Ultimately, all the above points would still work out for the best if you knew more about Rammstein. Now for the practical recommendations. See if you like their music first: currently they have seven albums out, the most recent of which is Rammstein (2019). I don’t know how hard you like your music, but in order of most hardness to least my rank goes:

Liebe ist für alle da / Reise, Reise

Rammstein (2019)

Sehnsucht

Mutter

Herzeleid

Rosenrot

My personal ranking is:

Mutter

Liebe ist für alle da / Rammstein (2019)

Sehnsucht

Reise, Reise

Herzeleid

Rosenrot

Their best tracks usually have music videos attached to them. Check them out too. R+ take serious care with their music video narratives, they’re often their own little story in themselves. Their live performances are worth watching, even in video. If you can read German, I would also recommend checking out Rammstein literature, of which there are plenty. Till has three volumes of poetry out (Messer, In Stillen Nachten, 100 Gedichte); Flake has two autobiographies (Der Tastenficker and Heute hat die Welt Geburtstag, the latter of which is available in English); Mix Mir Einen Drink is the biography of Feeling B, which many members of Rammstein played in before Rammstein, and is an invaluable source for GDR life.

Out of everything I’ve listed, as of Feb 2021, Flake’s autobiography is hands-down the best place to begin your Rammstein journey. There will be a more extensive book about Rammstein by Olaf Heine soon, but it won’t be released until later this year.

There is no end goal to how much you should be interested in Rammstein, or what about the band you ought to like. At any point in this journey, try out a fic or two, see what you like. The fandom has written about basically every music video, every notable event that happened to the band (some may include sources!), and just about every combination of pairings possible among the six. You are in very well-covered territory, I promise :D

Feel free to ask more questions if need be. There is so much you can write about this band, I’ve definitely not covered everything. If at any point in this process you read Desiderata, and you end up enjoying it, that’s all I could ask for.

[maximumninjavoid]

Mining for Unobtanium

Chapter 9

you all seem to be enjoying it... So, I'll keep word vomiting and we will see where this goes. 

18 and over, please.

Smut, D/s, this one gets a tad angsty. I have no idea. I just go where the imaginary people tell me.

Number nine, number nine

I laid there, covered in a light sheen of sweat, panting, cunt throbbing, aching to be completely full of cock, and having to be content with the orgasms I had. I rolled over, lit a cigarette and contemplated the twists my life had taken of late. It was almost incomprehensible. And it occurred to me I hadn't been paid lately, and I wasn't entirely certain that I minded.

I had gotten the list back of the links and fetishes, and, as I expected, he was thorough, and precise. There were things he was interested in exploring, and things he wanted to experience, and he specified which he had done, and which he wanted to do, and from which side of the equation. I smiled. I KNEW he was switchy.

It didn't change the fact that he had yet to lay eyes on me. That he hadn't come face to face with the age difference, my additional pounds, and all of that could still be a deal breaker. Oh. Great. Hello, asshole that lives in my head. I figured you would show up about now. I was having too good of a time for you not to destroy it. So, sure, hit the highlight feel and let's revisit EVERY bad decision I've made since third grade. I lit another cigarette. This was going to be a long night.

Now, in the right frame of mind, for the right individual, I can be very submissive. But I'm much more of a bottom. I'd prefer to still be in control..... Ok, we'll do this ,this, this, you'll do this to me, this to me, and, then, we will tuck like wild animals.....ready? Go!

Nothing jumped out at me as I went down the list, face fucking, choking, some August Walker shit.... Not surprised...bondage, edging, orgasm control, restraint, ice, wax, knives.....ooooh... I LOVE knives....hair brush spankings, I'll bet that goes with the Daddy thing...teasing, spanking, hair pulling, oh, yes.....this was going to be fun!

If this was actually going to happen, then I needed to start putting things into motion. I called a friend at Mr. S in San Francisco, and gave them my shopping list. Butter soft leather, custom construction, suspension cuffs, wrist and ankle restraints, a few brand new floggers, one in certain for warm ups, one in buffalo that's thuddy, almost like a massage, and then I started searching my stored toys.

Paddles, canes, needles, first aid kits, my singletails, harness, dicks, it had been a while since I had a submissive of my own, but, some things a Domme can never part with. It gave me something else to focus on rather than my rising panic. Even if I strapped myself to a treadmill and ate a rice cake a day.....just stop. We are not even going there.

The next time the phone rang, it caught me off guard. I had been daydreaming, I suppose. Thinking about actually meeting him. Seeing that face, those eyes, and looking at me, and smiling. I don't even think I registered the ring tone. " Hello? "  "Oh, it's hello now, is it?"  " Yes, well, one must try to keep some air of mystery.... You must be completely done in. Any new injuries? "  " So far I have been fortunate, the training has really paid off. I am looking forward to not wearing contact lenses for a while. "

We talked about Kal, the press schedule, what was next, the new Netflix movie and I said I really like the longer curls. "Just enough to grab a hold of" and he got quiet.

" And where do you think we'll be going? Know of an island, do you? Where they won't impound Kal? Someplace you don't get mobbed? Wait, I know... Another planet? You haven't even told me your name.

"Did I cross a line?"

" No. ... I .... Just..... "

"You think you might enjoy that. You're surprised I mentioned it. I think there's a great deal you may enjoy. And I'll have you know I'm working very hard to not sing ' A Whole New World' from Aladdin very off key. I'm a terrible singer but enthusiastic. But that's...."

" not the point" he interrupted. "These phone calls and emails are great. But  I... We.... Can't make any inroads this far apart. I know you'll need a two week head start, for quarantine, even if you have a negative Covid test. "

 And you haven't even asked mine. "

And I hung up the phone and I had a good cry.

[migleefulmoments]

How they make up a whole story to criticize Mia with 10 seconds?? Again, I don't know why I'm surprised, they've doing it for 10 years. But their imagination is getting wild, they're unhinged. I don't know how they can't see they're full of bullshit and they're making lies of everything.

It feels to me that the behavior is getting worse- it’s more intense and the lies are getting more consistent and more outrageous. They have moved from being focused on Criss and Colfer to focusing on Mia but Mia doesn't have a social media presence they can access regularly so they end up having to fill in a lot of blanks and over time she gets bolder and bolder about what she is willing to fabricate. I also think she just living more within the fantasy then she used to be. Obviously, nothing is going her way as Chris and Darren have no relationship and reblogging gifs from 6+ years ago has lost its luster -though they still do it.   She admits she is in a constant state of anxiety, that she doesn’t sleep, and that she is very angry-at times she mentions she’s “shaking with rage”. We know she checks Tumbler and blogs in the middle of the night and she spends all her waking hours stalking and blogging. She has doubled down on her fantasy and that includes writing richly detailed backstories to simple photographs which she then she fully buys into and believes. Just read any of her posts where she provides her “evidence cc is real”, they come off as silly and insignificant but she’s dead serious. She brings up the same “facts” over and over; each one is trivial and proves nothing but also has been proven untrue. She has no concern over truth-whatever proves shes’ right is repeated over and over. 

This from Oct 22 is a good example

ajw720. Having watched a lot of the footage from Sunday, it is clear to me D was uncomfortable and on edge. It is possible it is because it is his first big movie and the company he is keeping. But he had no issues with standing next to P/enelope or R/icky and bantering with them and enjoying himself to the maximum. (What is “a lot” of footage? Total problem less than a minute of Darren’s day and he wasn’t uncomfortable and on edge because of Mia. He was promoting a movie that he was barely in, with a cast that he barely worked with if at all. I’m sure if he was nervous it was because he was unsure of his place and trying to be engaged but not an attention hog.) 

Add that photo with M. he did not even try, it is so clear his tolerance level has been well exceeded and I would add that she was not happy based on the clips of her lurking on the RC during the live-stream not looking happy. (Here she is reading way too much into a simple photo. It is NOT possible to know how someone is feeling from a photo and Abby has proven she can’t read emotions on faces) 

Plus we have him playing piano at the after party, which is a wonderful thing, but we know he does it as a coping mechanism and to avoid conversation. (WTAF? None of this is something “we know”.  It’s all projected and fabricated by Abby to fit her needs)

So I am asking his team and anyone else forcing this ridiculous situation.  What are you trying to achieve?  M looks like an idiot at this point, I would be mortified if I were her.  D treats her terribly and clearly is disgusted by her.  So what is it you are trying to prove?  You had to know at some point, as their relationship is unhealthy and utterly contentious, it would be near impossible to sell it.  And make no mistake, her 10 stans may not want to let go, but they know it is off.  And the wedding didn’t help, it hurt.  (Darren treats her terribly? What a horrible thing to say about the man you love. I never understand why she prefers to believe he’s an asshole rather than believe he’s straight. I love the tragedy of insisting we know she’s right-that’s always a standard for a narcissist Trump does that a lot as well). 

So can we be done now?  I know I have asked this repeatedly, but this makes absolutely no sense. D looks less and less straight every minute he is forced to spend with her. If that were the goal (and i don’t think it is), you would be so much better cutting your losses, separating them, and getting him a new beard he actually likes and that doesn’t repel him when they touch.  However I don’t think this has anything to do with him being straight. Straight is just how you control him. (He “looks less straight”? How does one “look straight” or “look gay”. Why would he need a new beard? According to Abby, he’s proud to be gay and ready and anxious to come out so there would be no need for beard.)  

When is enough enough?  How much longer will you torture him and steal from him?  How do you sleep at night?  I really wonder. (Oh such drama- she is fully behind the story she’s woven and the emotions are real). 

September 2

I don’t think I’ll surprise anyone by saying I’ve been struggling since the sham mockery. I never thought he’d go there and it hit me hard. It physically pains me that this was ever allowed to spin so out of control. That ring hurts my eyes. And I’ve often questioned the motive. The why. I want to believe in him. They’ve made it hard. And no question, that was their intent.

And here we are almost 7 months later. And I’m going on record. I’m proud of our boy. Everyday it’s becoming more and more clear. I don’t think there was a choice. Well at least one that was not dangerous to d or someone he loved. He swallowed his pride and he did the needful. And now I think we are watching him execute a plan conceived with C. He’s using the enablers. Bravo. He set certain people to look like her friend, when in reality I’m confident she (yes one person in particular) is completely team d working with him and c. He’s making strides to pay off his “debts.” Everything this year seems so odd except when looked at critically, it is clear it’s deliberate.

I wondered if c&d could withstand this. And now I’ve never been more sure. Not only are they together. I think stronger than ever.

So I’m gonna fight. I’m staying right where I am. I expect this to get really, really ugly yet. I’m sure there are more tears. More curses. More screams. But I will see him win.

Or one of her “lists” of nonsense “proof”

How do they believe after multiple encagement rings?  He said during season 6 of g/lee he had never committed to anything longer, not even a relationship. He has said on camera “I’m gay.”  They don’t know when or how they met.  B/en lived with them for FOUR years. There are so many videos of him running away from her (the bts is gold).  He talks about going to see F/rozen with more enthusiasm than he does about his marriage.  He sold his wedding to 100 sponsors.  

There is so much, I could go on and on and on and on and on. I do not understand how ANYONE could believe.  I truly do not.  And it has only gotten worse after the sham mockery. 

[thefudge]

What do you think are the main differences between book!Arya and show!Arya? What do you think about them? (i don't know if you have written anything on this topic, if you already did i'm sorry)

i haven’t! but im sure some of my arya thoughts are on here, just not all of them put together

whenever i see show apologists talk about arya, they usually go: “oooh, you think she’s a psycho here?? she does worse things in the books”

and a) arya stark is not supposed to come off as a psycho (does she suffer from deep mental strain due to trauma? yeah, that’s different)

b) saying she does worse things is MISSING THE POINT

it’s not the violence that matters (well, it does, but not as much), it’s arya’s  REACTION and ABSORPTION of it 

everyone in asoiaf has to compromise at one point. there are no innocents. but it’s how people cope with these situations that make them, you know, people

arya-bot3000 from the show is not really a human being 

main differences:

1. book!arya is afraid all the time and this is an important aspect of her story  (like her father said, that’s the only time you can really be brave.) she is hardly ever sure of the outcome of her actions. just one example: her escape from harrenhal in the book is a terrifying ordeal which she goes through because there doesn’t seem to be another way out. show!arya strolls confidently out into the open while gendry cowers in fear. show!arya seems brash and self-sufficient even when she’s down. show!arya has “defeated” fear somehow. she strolls into danger like a weathered soldier….which….means she’s got nothing left to learn, i guess (to be clear, this has gotten worse with each season. s2!arya might as well be courage, the cowardly dog in comparison to s7!arya)

2. this brings me to emotions. book!arya feels them in SPADES. if you go have a look over her chapters and you consider the adjectives used and the stylistic choices, her POV is one of the most emotionally charged there is.  another thing is, arya sucks at hiding her emotions. which seems to be a problem for her spy training. as a faceless man, she shouldn’t go to pieces when she stumbles across her past. for instance, she kills Dareon just cuz she realizes he’s a night’s watch deserter. dude. come on. that’s a huge no-no if you’re trying to become this impartial embodiment of the god of death. and the house of black and white know she sucks at her emotions and i think they also know she won’t ever truly be faceless. i think they’re just happy to have a Stark with warging abilities under their control. this long diatribe is just to say that the show writers haven’t understood shit about her training. because in the show, they….sort of have their cake and eat it too. they make arya an excellent assassin/faceless man, but also…have her choose not to be one…because???  literally, her last scene with jaqen hagar is him saying “you truly are no one now” and her going like “psyche! u thought! i’m going back home!” in the span of five minutes. ….there is no point to this. and THEN when we see her in winterfell in s7, she’s got the masks with her. SO, she has embraced the training while also rejecting it??? do d&d care??? (and see, they MIGHT have made this work if they had made her abandon the masks altogether. some s6 episodes seemed to be hinting that arya disagrees with the house of black and white cuz this is what got her friend, the actress, killed. and yet, that one-time friendship doesn’t seem to matter in s7. arya embraces her (incomplete and nonexistent) training. because???

3. book!arya doesn’t hate femininity and all things girly. she envies them. there’s a difference. book!arya actually wishes she could be beautiful and feminine AND boyish and adventurous at the same time. it’s the fact that she wants these things which seem contradictory in westeros society that makes her lash out against women who fit the bill. show!arya proudly says “most girls are stupid”. myep.

4. book!arya gets attached to people BIG TIME. show!arya used to have that kind of empathy towards others. not anymore. book!arya still sadly recalls yoren who was supposed to take her to the wall in acok. she STILL to this day thinks about that orphan girl, weasel, whom she met in acok and whose name she used to hide her own identity. she immediately takes to certain braavosi courtesans and has favorite mummers and friends by the docks. meanwhile, show!arya is reunited with hot-pie and acts like he’s a gum on her shoe. LISTEN, i do think that arya stark is not gonna be super well-adjusted when the War for the Dawn ends. if she survives, i know she’s not gonna be a social butterfly. but her desire for connection with others WILL still be there. her compassion for others WILL survive. the creators of the show decided that the only way they can show a “grown up” arya who is wise and strong is by having them retcon her entire emotional journey. many ppl have wondered, for instance, why they didn’t give us an arya/gendry reunion. u know why. because they’d have to actually write arya as a human being with emotions. those stilted smiles she gave sansa wouldn’t cut it anymore. cuz gendry saw sides of her she’s not ready to remember. and d&d have decided she is a cool badass now. i would NOT be surprised at all if they never give us a gendrya reunion. i rly wouldn’t. 

5. book!arya definitely holds grudges and is convinced that only the lannisters are to blame for her troubles. she thinks eradicating them and their cronies will be enough. that’s a flawed, but reasonable perspective. what book!arya doesnt do is blame her sister for all of this.  even if book!arya found out about sansa’s letter to robb, she’d, at most, think sansa was naive to trust cersei but….that’s fucking it. in fact, this whole thing would make cersei the top name of her list. meanwhile, show!arya is a step away from putting sansa’s name on the list. book!arya hopes sansa is still alive. show!arya hopes for her death. and no, their flimsy reconciliation at he end does nothing to rewrite this terrible arc. 

6. the show, i guess, didn’t have the budget to stay in braavos longer (altho it wasted some of that budget on flashy, ineffective fight scenes between her and the waif). this cuts arya’s arc veeery short and reduces her whole character. because arya’s quest for identity is seemingly resolved. when that is NOT the case in the books. the fact that she’s got so many names and constantly shifts from one to the next, the fact that Cat of the Canals is exercising a deeper power on her than her other aliases is not explored at all in the show. because d&d think that arya’s time in braavos is about becoming some kind of seasoned Stark warrior. HAHA. so these guys are not even writing the same character. forget differences, their arya might as well be one of the sand snakes or whatever. 

it might be worth noting that yeah, the sand snakes and brienne are written in exactly the same way. any woman who can hold her own on the battlefield has to relinquish emotional depth. there’s no time for having existential crises, because in their reality, you’re either  Badass Strong Man-Woman or a Naive Crying Woman-Baby. no in-between. thx d&d

so that would sum it up for me. there are 100 more differences if you went through the plot book-by-book, but these are the most glaring thematic ones for me. 

show!arya at this point is a bot, pure and simple. 

[paulisaac]

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[iradiata]

It's DS Angel again! :D Don't be sorry, you're good! :D You really do have a talent of writing such stories and even novels! :D That's terrific. Just a quick question, do you have writer's block sometimes and how do you overcome it? :3 Writer's block has been a challenge for me, considering that I write fanfiction about my favorite movies, particularly animated ones. (This is part one of my response because there's so many words I can type in the ask box). ^_^

Okay, like an absolute fool I forgot to link this. And don’t feel bad about writing so much! I’m honored actually that you needed multiple asks (but that might be because I tend to give such long-winded responses so I love long questions/comments/answers even if sometimes I’m not in the reading mood). And thank you! Honestly, writing short stories is such a difficulty for me or little novellas. I mean, I can write something between a few hundred words to maybe 2k but anything longer than that that’s shorter than 75k+ is very hard for me to do. I don’t know how people do it because I need all those words to make it through the whole plot and story.

As for your question about writer’s block (ask me all the questions you want) I get that very often. I’m going to use the first novel I wrote back in 2016. I started it in January and I was doing good, I think I got to about 20k maybe and then I hit a stump before January was done. I still knew what I wanted to write but I hit writer’s block and throughout the following months I think I would occasionally write fanfiction or something else but it wasn’t until November (near the middle of the month) that I finally went back to that story. On December 30 of 2016, I finished that novel at 81k. What I’m trying to say (and I’m not a professional or anything so go ahead and take this with a grain of salt) is that I think writer’s block is natural and everyone gets it. What I try to do now that I have a bit more experience with it and writing is not stress about it so much (easier said than done, I know and still something I work on) but I read somewhere that having an artistic block is a natural and good thing. When we write and create content we’re pumping something out of nothing and it’s like we’re emptying a well of creativity and motivation and inspiration and once we’ve depleted one of those things, we need a break for it to built up again so that we can word vomit some more. It’s frustrating, I agree, but nothing to worry about. But! That’s not to say that you can’t try doing little writing exercises or set a word count and write that amount no matter how much you think it sucks. And, maybe that’ll lead you to keep writing that day until you have more than you thought you would. However, if you’ve been working yourself like crazy to write (like I did in November) then I think writer’s block might also be your body and your mind’s way of telling you to take a small break and chill (what I’m doing now and will do for a few more days).

Wow, that was a very long answer (sorry). Like with regular books I’m kind of weird with fanfiction and have to be in the mood to read fanfiction from a certain fandom and sometimes I’ll stay with a ship or fandom for a day or a few days or a few weeks before bouncing onto another ship or fandom. I’m trying to read less fandom right now though and read more published books but it’s hard to juggle the two. I’m just glad I haven’t added writing to the mix yet because then I get overwhelmed and confused and end up doing neither of the three.

Writing is hard! When I was younger and thought about being a writer I thought it might be a bit easier but it’s not and I’m actually okay with that. I get upset with writing (doing the actual writing can be the worst sometimes) but I’m glad that this is my passion and that I enjoy it even when I’m not. At times I feel like I don’t have a lot of creativity and don’t like my novels because they feel so lacking but that might also be because I’m so close to them and have been looking at them for so long. After all, we are our own worst critics and that is so true. But I think I will try finding some writing prompts online. I used to be terrible at keeping notes/ideas because I thought I needed to write it on paper but within the past few months I’ve started using the memo pad on my phone to jot down notes or ideas or character names (all in a list that I might or might not use) and I’ve even started writing scenes or worked on my stories from my phone. It was weird at first to do that but I’ve gotten used to it. Actually, a note back to the writer’s block thing, also try using a different medium to write. If you’re typing, try using your phone or longhand (on paper) and longhand might suck when you have to type everything up but I’ve found that sometimes that gets my creative juices flowing again.

Do you have any instrumental or orchestral recommendations I can listen too? I’d love to know some of your favorites. OH MY GOODNESS!! SILVER BELLS IS MY FAVORITE CHRISTMAS SONG!! Sorry but I’m so happy to find someone else who loves Silver Bells the best. Personally, I can’t decide if I like Dean Martin or Bing Crosby’s version better. Dean has such an amazing voice but so does Bing and he has a female singing on his track with him. Either way, both are amazing! Do you have a favorite version of Silver Bells?

Anyway! Sorry for such a long answer! :P