#Have you chewed a joint pill? Don't.
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Is it sad that one of the highlights of my day is eating my gummy vitamins because they taste good?
#I usually take the Women's Alive! Vitamins#But the store hasn't had them lately#So now I'm taking Centrum Women's#The Alive tastes better but the Centrum has grown on me#I wish they made joint pill gummies#I'm tired of taking horse pills#Of course. Considering what joint pills are made from...#Making shellfish taste fruity is probably a bad idea#Have you chewed a joint pill? Don't.#Bleh.#tw medication mention#Vitamins#just adult things#adulting#millennial humor#spoonie humor#Chronic illness#actually disabled
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Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Reviews Shocking Side Effects Reveals Must Read Before Buy !!
➾ Product Name - Choice CBD Gummies 300mg
➾ Main Benefits - Relief Stress, Pain & Improve Health
➾ Category - Pain Relief
➾ Dosage - 2 Gummies per day
➾ Price - Online Check
➾ Result - 2-3 Months
➾ Official Website - Click Here
✅Visit The Official Website To Get Your Bottle Now✅
✅Visit The Official Website To Get Your Bottle Now✅
✅Visit The Official Website To Get Your Bottle Now✅
What are Choice CBD Gummies 300mg?
Vegetarians are becoming more interested in Choice CBD Gummies 300mg, which are a gummy supplement form. There are many flavors to choose from, and each has its own special blend of CBD to help you relax. Each container contains thirty individually wrapped candies. Within a short time the heated object reaches its full potential and then the results can be seen. Choice CBD Gummies 300mg is easy to use, works well, and is safe. They are so helpful with the hard work that needs to be done.
These US Choice CBD Gummies 300mg pills are a great way to relieve pain at home. With standard toppings and Choice CBD certification, CBD gummies are a great way to fight boredom. This candy has to have more than one good thing. Despite what some may say, CBD products don't have the benefits they claim. The cannabidiol found in CBD drugs is used to relieve many painful symptoms. Sells Choice CBD Gummies 300mg United States. Each gum contains 10 milligrams of CBD and has been shown to help a variety of health conditions. The group says you can help control your endocannabinoid system by chewing Choice CBD (ECS) gum.
>>Click Here to Buy Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Reviews Now with an Exclusive Discount<<
How do Choice CBD Gummies 300mg work?
Choice CBD Gummies 300mg can help with a variety of health issues such as stress and anxiety, acute pain, and general aches and pains. They can also help with some other medical conditions. The endocannabinoid system limits it even more. In order to get the CBD from the jar into the pill, a better extraction method is used. This is important because if you do this you can use less edible food and get rid of all the CBD. Not everyone will benefit from a high absorption rate, although that is a good thing.
With Choice CBD Gummies 300mg you can protect your eyes and your heart from disease and hard times. It can also handle any number of audio channels. This reduces the chances of you getting irritated, sick or losing your appetite during the flight. It also has a great effect on your bones, which is a nice bonus. As a result, joints are reduced and bones move more easily.
Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Ingredients:-
Effects of Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Benefits made from natural and organic ingredients can help overcome various health problems :
• Cannabidiol, or CBD, is a chemical derived from the cannabis plant that is effective in treating a variety of health problems. CBD Gummies Cannabidiol or CBD is a chemical that comes from the cannabis plant and is good for your health and your heart.
• Lavender gum is very popular, which makes sense since it can help with insomnia, stress, and other mental health issues.
• Coconut candy is a great choice for anyone who cares about their appearance, as it can help relieve chronic pain, aid digestion and treat several skin conditions.
• Castor gummies are made with castor oil, which has been shown to aid digestion, treat insomnia, and reduce inflammation. They also have a wide variety of vitamins and minerals.
• Clove extract not only helps with pain but also purifies the blood and makes you healthier overall.
• In the area around Southeast Asia you can find several fixer plants, such as for example. B. Zingiber. This herbal extract can help build strength, relieve tendon problems, and relieve joint pain.
• People often use green tea concentrate to improve their health and well-being. As a bonus, there's plenty of cellular amplification to keep your brain, heart and heart from collapsing.
• Flavors: Each spring water, which comes in a variety of sizes and shapes, is packed with fruit extracts. This brings out the delicious fruity taste.
Must See: Visit the Official Site of Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Discount [Available Here]
Benefits of Choice CBD Gummies 300mg
Choice CBD Gummies 300mg are designed to provide several benefits, many of which are listed below, because they are made from natural ingredients.
• Your mood improves and you are better able to cope with stress-related problems.
• Not only helps you fall asleep faster, but also helps you sleep all night.
• Helps your digestive and immune systems work better, making you feel healthier and more energetic overall.
• It will help you take advantage of this and keep your heart healthy.
• One of its many benefits is that it makes you more focused and able to concentrate.
• It keeps your mind from wandering, which helps you remember things.
• Makes your skin look and feel better at the same time.
• You can control your blood sugar and "bad" cholesterol (LDL).
• Help you become stronger, livelier and last longer.
(Special Discount Offer) For the Best Price on Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Right Now, Click Here!
Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Side Effects
Choice CBD Gummies 300mg are loved and tolerated by many people around the world. But some people may experience mild side effects, such as dry mouth, fatigue, or loss of appetite. Fortunately, these side effects are usually mild and only last a few hours before going away on their own.
Before you start CBD treatment, it's important to know that CBD may not work well with some other medications. Since this is the case, you should talk to your doctor before starting.
Where can I buy Choice CBD Gummies 300mg?
Choice CBD Gummies 300mg are easy to get because they are sold online and can be purchased from the Choice CBD Gummies 300mg Official Website. Make sure you follow all the rules for ordering your package. Once you do this, your order will be scheduled and delivered to your door within a few business days. Since these parallels are hard to find, you should make your travel plans as soon as possible.
Diploma
Depending on where the power is coming from, the time between updates of some packages and metrics may vary. The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has stated that adults can use CBD gum from the official Choice CBD website, which helps with pain relief and relief. THC, which makes people drunk and harmful to human health, does not exist. Pregnant or nursing mothers, teenagers, and others who should not chew CBD gum. People who adhere to set standards rarely say what they think about whether or not they can live up to them. This is because they have been taught to see things as permanent.
[WANT TO KNOW MORE GET MORE ONLY ON THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE]
Choice CBD Gummies 300mg are delicious meds made in the United States. When you are sad, this delicious crunch can cheer you up and save you time. Choice CBD Gummies 300mg is known for its crazy effects, so the company founders were surprised to learn about such a complex and innovative process. So, the best choice is Choice CBD Gummies 300mg US.
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Rejuvenate CBD Gummies: Does It Really Work & Is It Safe?
➾ Product Name - Rejuvenate CBD Gummies
➾ Main Benefits - Relief Stress, Pain & Improve Health
➾ Category - Pain Relief
➾ Dosage - 2 Gummies per day
➾ Price - Online Check
➾ Result - 2-3 Months
➾ Official Website - Click Here
✅Visit The Official Website To Get Your Bottle Now✅
✅Visit The Official Website To Get Your Bottle Now✅
✅Visit The Official Website To Get Your Bottle Now✅
What are Rejuvenate CBD Gummies?
Vegetarians are becoming more interested in Rejuvenate CBD Gummies, which are a gummy supplement form. There are many flavors to choose from, and each has its own special blend of CBD to help you relax. Each container contains thirty individually wrapped candies. Within a short time the heated object reaches its full potential and then the results can be seen. Rejuvenate CBD Gummies is easy to use, works well, and is safe. They are so helpful with the hard work that needs to be done.
These US Rejuvenate CBD Gummies pills are a great way to relieve pain at home. With standard toppings and Rejuvenate CBD certification, CBD gummies are a great way to fight boredom. This candy has to have more than one good thing. Despite what some may say, CBD products don't have the benefits they claim. The cannabidiol found in CBD drugs is used to relieve many painful symptoms. Sells Rejuvenate CBD Gummies United States. Each gum contains 10 milligrams of CBD and has been shown to help a variety of health conditions. The group says you can help control your endocannabinoid system by chewing Rejuvenate CBD (ECS) gum.
>>Click Here to Buy Rejuvenate CBD Gummies Reviews Now with an Exclusive Discount<<
How do Rejuvenate CBD Gummies work?
Rejuvenate CBD Gummies can help with a variety of health issues such as stress and anxiety, acute pain, and general aches and pains. They can also help with some other medical conditions. The endocannabinoid system limits it even more. In order to get the CBD from the jar into the pill, a better extraction method is used. This is important because if you do this you can use less edible food and get rid of all the CBD. Not everyone will benefit from a high absorption rate, although that is a good thing.
With Rejuvenate CBD Gummies you can protect your eyes and your heart from disease and hard times. It can also handle any number of audio channels. This reduces the chances of you getting irritated, sick or losing your appetite during the flight. It also has a great effect on your bones, which is a nice bonus. As a result, joints are reduced and bones move more easily.
Rejuvenate CBD Gummies Ingredients:-
Effects of Rejuvenate CBD Gummies Benefits made from natural and organic ingredients can help overcome various health problems :
• Cannabidiol, or CBD, is a chemical derived from the cannabis plant that is effective in treating a variety of health problems. CBD Gummies Cannabidiol or CBD is a chemical that comes from the cannabis plant and is good for your health and your heart.
• Lavender gum is very popular, which makes sense since it can help with insomnia, stress, and other mental health issues.
• Coconut candy is a great choice for anyone who cares about their appearance, as it can help relieve chronic pain, aid digestion and treat several skin conditions.
• Castor gummies are made with castor oil, which has been shown to aid digestion, treat insomnia, and reduce inflammation. They also have a wide variety of vitamins and minerals.
• Clove extract not only helps with pain but also purifies the blood and makes you healthier overall.
• In the area around Southeast Asia you can find several fixer plants, such as for example. B. Zingiber. This herbal extract can help build strength, relieve tendon problems, and relieve joint pain.
• People often use green tea concentrate to improve their health and well-being. As a bonus, there's plenty of cellular amplification to keep your brain, heart and heart from collapsing.
• Flavors: Each spring water, which comes in a variety of sizes and shapes, is packed with fruit extracts. This brings out the delicious fruity taste.
Must See: Visit the Official Site of Rejuvenate CBD Gummies Discount [Available Here]
Benefits of Rejuvenate CBD Gummies
Rejuvenate CBD Gummies are designed to provide several benefits, many of which are listed below, because they are made from natural ingredients.
• Your mood improves and you are better able to cope with stress-related problems.
• Not only helps you fall asleep faster, but also helps you sleep all night.
• Helps your digestive and immune systems work better, making you feel healthier and more energetic overall.
• It will help you take advantage of this and keep your heart healthy.
• One of its many benefits is that it makes you more focused and able to concentrate.
• It keeps your mind from wandering, which helps you remember things.
• Makes your skin look and feel better at the same time.
• You can control your blood sugar and "bad" cholesterol (LDL).
• Help you become stronger, livelier and last longer.
(Special Discount Offer) For the Best Price on Rejuvenate CBD Gummies Right Now, Click Here!
Rejuvenate CBD Gummies Side Effects
Rejuvenate CBD Gummies are loved and tolerated by many people around the world. But some people may experience mild side effects, such as dry mouth, fatigue, or loss of appetite. Fortunately, these side effects are usually mild and only last a few hours before going away on their own.
Before you start CBD treatment, it's important to know that CBD may not work well with some other medications. Since this is the case, you should talk to your doctor before starting.
Where can I buy Rejuvenate CBD Gummies?
Rejuvenate CBD Gummies are easy to get because they are sold online and can be purchased from the Rejuvenate CBD Gummies Official Website. Make sure you follow all the rules for ordering your package. Once you do this, your order will be scheduled and delivered to your door within a few business days. Since these parallels are hard to find, you should make your travel plans as soon as possible.
Diploma
Depending on where the power is coming from, the time between updates of some packages and metrics may vary. The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has stated that adults can use CBD gum from the official Rejuvenate CBD website, which helps with pain relief and relief. THC, which makes people drunk and harmful to human health, does not exist. Pregnant or nursing mothers, teenagers, and others who should not chew CBD gum. People who adhere to set standards rarely say what they think about whether or not they can live up to them. This is because they have been taught to see things as permanent.
[WANT TO KNOW MORE GET MORE ONLY ON THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE]
Rejuvenate CBD Gummies are delicious meds made in the United States. When you are sad, this delicious crunch can cheer you up and save you time. Rejuvenate CBD Gummies is known for its crazy effects, so the company founders were surprised to learn about such a complex and innovative process. So, the best choice is Rejuvenate CBD Gummies US.
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Essential CBD Extract Gummies
Essential CBD Gummies: Price, Ingredients and Side Effects (Beware Exposed 2023) Read Before Buying
CBD Gummies from Chemist Warehouse We're all naturally worried about our physical well-being, but delaying the process of taking care of our health is not advised. One of the factors that prevents your attention from becoming fixated for a long time is pain. They weaken people mentally and sap their enthusiasm from life. This is the ideal remedy if you've been searching for a temporary and repeat-free way to eliminate your agony.
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What are the elements and substances that make it up?
Calcium is the main component of bone growth and guarantees that bone strength is preserved, ensuring that pain will always be revered.
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Do you have any knowledge of any negative impacts that CBD products may have?
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You are constantly aware and engaged.
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Are the experts satisfied with the outcomes? -
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What time of day is ideal for using the gummy? -
The supplement will probably be used for a full month, but if there is extreme pain, this should be extended.
By using this, are individuals mending themselves? -
It is clear that almost everyone who used the supplement was able to heal, and as a result, it has gained recognition as the best supplement for helping individuals with aches right now.
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Getting high with them for the first time
N/A: If you do drugs do it safely
My masterlist
- Eren Jaeger
He's not the type of guy who pressured you to use, let alone say you're immature or coward for it. When you decide to try it, it's genuinely your idea, and who better than your boyfriend to teach?
That's how you end up in his room, with the door and windows lock to make sure the smell doesn't catch his parent's attention. You sat on the carpet while he carefully rolls the joint so that the cigarette holder doesn't fall.
“Tighten your lips like this and take a deep breath through your mouth” He took a short drag before releasing the smoke “But not too long since this is your first time your throat is not used to the smoke”
You nod and accept the cigarette doing as he said. You feel the smoke warm your mouth, watch it hoover before your eyes after blowing and wait for...Nothing. No different sensation, no tingling, literally nothing.
"I don't think it worked"
“It is not like a switch. Wait a minute, babe ”
You talk a little about the day-to-day of the two and then go to play something new that he had bought. After a few games and a few more huffs, you still don't feel any difference or anything. You even try to hold the smoke in your mouth for a longer time, which results in you coughing incessantly and Eren laughing in your face. Hearing him laugh has always been one of your favorite things. The way he bends his body and laughs out loud without shame until he blushes always makes you laugh together with him, like now.
You laugh, laugh until your body asks for air and needs to alternate between laughter and breathing. You feel calm, relax as if you had lifted a weight off your shoulders. You lay on the carpet feeling the softness of the fabric against your skin ... Was it always that soft? So silky? So comfortable? You close your eyes and rub your hand over the texture, and then the smell of Eren's citric perfume invades your nose. When you opened your eyes, jade eyes were watching you closely.
"I think it has taken effect now, huh?" He says stroking your hair. "Did I ever tell you how beautiful you are?" He asks, getting on top of you.
"A few times"
“Then I’m going to tell you again: you’re beautiful” he kisses your lips “So damn beautiful” He kisses your chin “Every single part of you” And now your jaw.
You two spent the afternoon making out on the floor and praising each other. Not because you were high, I mean, not only, but because being so sensitive brought it even more evident how much you wanted each other.
- Levi Ackerman
You had a horrible week. It seemed that everything that could go wrong over the course of seven days had made a point of happening even worse than you imagined. When you got home even after taking a long hot shower and lying in bed, you're unable to relax.
"If you keep turning from side to side, I won't sleep either" Murmured Levi.
"I know. Sorry"
"I'm not complaining. Come here" He pulls you to lie on his chest "Better?"
"A little bit"
"Just a little bit?" He smiles softly "You can try what I do when I get like this"
"Do you mean the mushrooms?"
"If you want to"
You two get out of bed and go to the kitchen. He takes a clear plastic bag from the fridge and places it in front of you. Levi is not the type of guy who gets high all the time. It's more like an escape for when his stress is too high, like yours. He already used it when you met him, and even if you didn't, you never saw a problem with it.
"Just it?"
"I can make tea if you prefer"
"Why don't you use weed like everyone else?"
"Too much work. To roll, check for purity. With mushrooms, I just need to buy and chew them ”
"Well, bon appetit"
You two eat the frozen mushrooms. The taste is not so bad, but it is not a good thing and the smell reminds you of something that had been removed from the forest, which makes sense. Levi suggests that you lie down on the sofa in the living room to watch a movie. There was no need to worry about tomorrow as it would be a day off for both of you.
Lying on Levi's lap and watching the TV, the colors start to shine before your eyes. You didn't remember the white wall looking so vivid, or the pixels on the TV seeming to slow down when you focused on a specific point. It was your house, but it didn't look real. You felt inside a peaceful dream, and inside that dream, you fell asleep forgetting about your nightmare week.
- Armin Arlert
It's your idea. It's Mikasa's birthday party, and Connie had taken some ecstasy pills from whoever wants to use them. So you take two, drag your boyfriend to the bathroom and lock the door.
"You don't have to do it with me if you don't want to, Armin"
"I'm curious too," He says, staring at the little pink pills on your hand.
Armin swallows one, and you do the same after him.
Armin swallows one, and you do the same after him. You want the experience to be as safe as possible. Then both sit in the bathtub and wait for the effect while talking. About half an hour later, you notice how dilated are the pupils of the blond in front of you. Your hearing is a little muffled, and you feel happy and light for no apparent reason. A slight tingle comes and goes through your body, like a wave spreading that sensation across your skin.
You go over to Armin and sit on his lap. He smiles at you, and more than ever, you want to kiss him until you're out of breath, and he's not different from you.
Armin takes your hand between his and brings it to his mouth. He spreads small, short kisses on your hand. You focus on the feeling of his lips running over your skin. You are so damn sensitive even his breathing makes you shiver.
As if a magnetic force pulls you both, you two kiss, letting that soft cloud of pleasure envelop you both. When Armin presses you against his body, deepening the kiss and tasting your mouth, you want to break the laws of physics and be able to occupy the same place as him. You want to become one with him.
And the two of you may not be able to do it, but you certainly tried A LOT in that bathroom.
- Jean Kirstein
Jean is handsome, tall, friendly, and intelligent. So when he starts to be invited to every possible party in college, you’re not surprised. You two have been dating since high school, and you don't feel jealous if he goes to parties alone but he always finds a way to convince you to accompany him with some excuse. Like, that it would be a lot more fun if you're next to him.
Today, this is one of those times when he convinces you. It's not that you don't like parties kind of, but a party full of strangers doesn't seem like the most attractive thing to you. Then after dancing and talking to people for a long time, he drags you to one of the rooms in the house to give you a well-deserved break.
"Thank you for coming with me," He said, hugging you from behind after closing the door.
"I'm going to want some compensation for that, Kirstein," You said, sitting down in an armchair that was there.
"How about ... That" Jean takes a bag with two white pills out of his pocket and tosses it towards you.
"What is it?"
"LSD"
"What kind of people have you been involved with?" You joke “If your mom knew what you've been up to, Jeanboo”
"Shut up" He sat next to her "If you want to try, I try"
It wouldn't be his first time getting high, he used to smoke weed with Eren in the basement since high school, but it would be yours. As I said, Jean is smart. You knew he had been wanting to try acid for some time. So of course, he had researched on.
Honestly? You are curious but afraid after so many speeches “don’t do drugs, kids”. Jean would never propose anything that could endanger the two of you, which is exactly why he only suggested it when you were alone, and if you said "no" it would be like it never happened.
"Is it just swallowing?"
"Put it under your tongue and let it dissolve"
You lie down on the floor and take it at the same time. It tastes bitter, but unlike any medicine, you've taken in your life.
It takes some time for it to start taking effect, but when it finally did you know. The sound of loud music, muffled by the walls of the room seems to be inside your head now. The colors tremble in front of you, mixing, moving, becoming more intense. You raise your hand towards the ceiling, and you don't feel like that's your hand. Everything seems surreal. You feel calm but active. It's like being very drunk, but the other way around.
Jean pulls you into his chest, and you can hear his heart pumping blood at full speed, like yours. You feel your throat dry, your body sweat, and your hands get cold.
If I could define that feeling with a word, it would definitely be intense.
You spent the night like that. Watching the furniture move and change shape, lying on the floor and without detaching from each other. At some point, you ended up sleeping, and after having the weirdest dream of your life, you woke up with Jean calling you carefully. The sun had already risen, and the house was silent, indicating that the party was over a long time ago.
"How are you feeling?" He asks, helping you to stand.
“Hungry and hungover”
He mumbles something about also being, and you go out to eat at the nearest cafeteria.
#Eren Yaegar#eren x reader#eren jaeger x reader#eren yaeger x reader#eren yaeger imagine#attack on titan eren#levi x reader#levi ackerman#levi attack on titan#armin x reader#armin arlert x reader#armin x y/n#armin x you#armin arlert#jean x reader#jean krischtein x reader#jean#aot x you#aot x reader#aot imagines#shingeki no kyojin#shingeki no kyojin x reader
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0: Do you have any tips for managing arthritis? (You don't have to answer this of course)
Ooh lordy! Okay, I'm about to rant. I gotta put this shit under the cut, hold up.
Stretch! Do stretches! I'm unlucky enough to have polyarticular rheumatoid arthritis, meaning I've got it in 5 or more joints. I think I've got it in every joint, but I ain't totally sure. I just know it heavily affects my wrists, fingers, knees, hips, ankles, toes (as weird as that is lmao), jaw, back, elbows, shoulders, neck, etc.
sO
Do stretches where you can! I know that when you go to physical therapy for that, they tell you to stretch, and you don't wanna do it. But do them! Especially if your arthritis is awful! Make sure when you do it, though, that you're doing it to the point where you're getting the stretch without hurting yourself. And do that stuff before a bunch of physical activity too, since it'll help! I can't find good websites that have stretches with images, but if you could google "arthritis stretches" and you can find some genuinely helpful stuff.
Don't overwork yourself either. If your feet hurt, try your hardest to find someplace to sit down. You've been writing non-stop for a long while? Put the pencil down for a minute or two. Roll your wrists too. And a good way to ease pain from writing is to shimmy your pencil up and down in your hands.
Take time to relax too. Chronic illnesses are hard as fuck to deal with, no matter how old you are. Whether you were diagnosed when you were seven years old or you got a diagnosis at 76.
And don't be rough on yourself mentally either! I read too much shit about people feeling shitty about getting it at "such a young age." Yeah, getting this disease sucks. It sucks no matter what age you're at. But it will be easier to feel better after you accept that you've got it.
If you get into remission, that's great! And I'm so fucking proud of you! And if you were in remission but you had a flare up? That's okay too! Just keep on going, okay?
Some days it'll feel pointless to do that, but trust me, if you stop taking your meds, you will feel like absolute shit. I didn't have an injection for one week and I was in so much pain. so please, take your medication, even if it can be a little scary. and if you aren't good at taking pills, ask your doctor if there's some way you could chew them.
what my parents did when I was first diagnosed (I was only seven and I couldn't swallow pills) they put my pill in some pudding or whipped cream and gave me the spoonful. if it was pudding, they let me eat the whole damn pudding cup. you can also practice trying to swallow pills with those mini m&m's.
also also! I've seen so many things on the arthritis tag on tumblr about how particular diets help with arthritis. personally, I'm not on a diet, and I don't notice my pain being any worse. so if you read that you have to ditch your favorite food for something, you likely don't. if you wanna go for a diet, go for it. if not, don't push yourself. maybe that bit only works for me, but who knows.
uhhhh... nothing else is popping into my head at the moment, and this is also already suuuuuper long. my bad. i just rambled at this point. oh well! I hope this helped a tad!
#sweet asks for septic#thatspookyagent#mutuals#arthritis#i fucking popped off#whoopsies#long post#this is super fucking long oh no
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Hi! Sorry for intruding, and you definitely don't have to answer if this too personnal or invasive, but I've been wondering if my depression might be a bipolar one for a while now, only I don't always see myself in the way people talk about mania/hypomania, only sometimes I do? And the way you described mania being /straightforwardly frustrating/ sort of spoke to me, so I was wondering if you could explain what you meant by that? (or direct me to posts where you have?) Huge thanks!
Hello friend!
I’m sure I have other posts about it somewhere, but short of digging through my whole relevant tag, I wouldn’t know where to look for them. But I don’t mind explaining overall.
First of all, if your depression seems to come and go, but not necessarily be replaced by hypomania or mania, it may be something else. Seasonal Affective Disorder is the most common alternative, but Cyclothymia is also a thing, and should especially be looked up if your depression also never hits a bottomless pit level. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking “well, it’s not THAT bad, so I guess I’m ONLY cyclothymic and I shouldn’t worry about it” or whatever though!! That’s just the depression talking and trying to keep you down. Ignore it.
I don’t know if I get manic or hypomanic, doctors have consistently disagreed about it. But, I know I have two main modes of mania, though they can bleed into each other.
There winds up being talk about hallucinations, self-harm, and graphic nightmares in this, so if that’s gonna bug anyone reading this, J on past it
Hyperactive mania:
What is sleep? This is not me procrastinating sleep or being distracted by other things, this is me flat out not needing more than 3-4 hours of sleep a night and having trouble getting to sleep to begin with, not in an insomnia “I’m so tired but can’t settle down” way but in a “I don’t feel tired unless I drink or take sleeping pills or otherwise really wear myself out” way.
Zero focus - I have little to no attention span most of the time to begin with (I suspect I have ADHD but most doctors will be reluctant to diagnose that in addition to bipolar, since mania has a lot of overlap). This typically gets worse during mania; I will repeatedly get up out of my chair to walk laps around my house, often gesturing wildly and definitely talking out loud to myself if no one’s home. I’ll sometimes try to play music to get the energy out to that, but rarely get through a single verse before skipping to the next.
Hyperfocus - and when I do manage to focus on something, (which has to either be something I’m REALLY ENJOYING or something social) I will get dragged into it for 14 hours and only snap out of it if I need a bathroom break or something. The Sims is a common one, not just for me but for a lot of people from what I hear. I always know something was a hyperfocus and not a thing I really wanted to do in general because after 3 days - 2 weeks of the thing I won’t touch it again for months or years. My last manic fit involved playing a sim city phone game for 6-7 hours a day and binge watching multiple people’s entire hermitcraft 4 season. The one before that had me playing rollercoaster tycoon constantly.
sex drive - suddenly characters and celebrities I had not previously regarded as hot are hot. Suddenly I have 15 AO3 tabs open. I feel like people who know me well can notice my mania just by how often and what gets reblogged to my NSFW blog.
poor decision making - I’m far more likely to buy ice cream or alcohol or other things I don’t need to be spending my money on. I’m far more likely to give in to the whole not sleeping thing, or to take sleeping meds despite cutting it way too close to when I have to be up the next day. I lose my verbal filter. I still don’t know if the fact I don’t do anything life-ruiningly stupid is evidence I’m only hypomanic, not manic, or just my anxiety keeping me in check.
Intense emotions - I cried at a University of Phoenix ad yesterday y’all. I also in general am not one to cheer or yell at something happening on TV/in a video, but get more invested when manic and react on a level closer to when I’m actively playing a game or something.
But there’s also the frustrating side (not that the above isn’t often frustrating, just that the above are more associated with positive emotions or at least not a pervasive Stressed Out feeling)
Easily frustrated - I am not one to get mad, normally. I actually get criticized for just letting things slide that obviously upset me/”you keep saying it’s okay right after saying it’s not okay”. I don’t know how to handle getting mad due to gaslighting issues growing up that I won’t get into right now so when I do start getting mad, it tends to build up until I find myself tense and literally stomping mad and sitting in the car screaming in frustration (because if I scream in the house someone might hear me). I also snap at people far, far more often when manic, losing any patience I would typically have and sometimes going for passive aggressive gouges if what they’re annoying me with has built up over a couple days as opposed to instantly. For example, yelling at people who are in my raid group.
nightmares - dear god the nightmares. I will do things in them that I find barely or completely unquestionable in them, then wake up freaked the fuck out because I just - well, we’ll go with today’s example, which is that I fuckin shot my dog in my dream, and for no apparent reason! Death is a pervasive thing in these, including me getting jolted awake by my own death in them, but unstoppable torrents of water are also common as is things just not making any sense - an object I’m holding turning into something else the moment I try to give it to someone else is also something that happens a lot
tense - dear god do my shoulders and back hurt, and not my normal everyday chronic arthritis pain, because that’s in the joints. This is every muscle pulled as tight as it will go and locked, and often carries a sensation of “the only way to fix this is to literally claw them off the bones”. Upper back is the most common but my forearms come next (especially near my elbows) and every major muscle can feel that way if I’m far enough gone. This used to lead to self-harm in the form of me scraping at those areas trying to make the sensation stop (and has lead to weird masochism stuff), but it’s something I consciously avoid now. I’ll usually try to rub at them or stretch to relieve the tightness, but often sleeping it off is my only real recourse.
really, really, REALLY unable to focus - I can’t get through two minutes of a video without pausing it. I skip every song 4 seconds in and instead of just feeling like they don’t fit quite right, each song feels like it’s personally offending me by not being the right one and I eventually give up and take off my headphones in a huff. I’ll forget I was loading the dishwasher halfway through. I’ll keep doing one more little task and one more little task for hours to procrastinate simple things like eating or walking the dog. I always in general have trouble finishing my sentences sometimes, because I’ll lose words or I’ll wind up reading/hearing something mid-sentence, but it becomes every third sentence.
Itchy - everything feels wrong. My hair has to be pinned up as thoroughly as possible so it can’t touch my skin, my glasses have to be perfectly clean because the smudges will piss me off, my clothes have to be just right so they don’t touch my skin in ways that will make me jump/itch like if my hair touches me, any rough edge of my nails or cuticles has to immediately be chewed off, if there’s a weird hair or a zit or a scab anywhere on me I will be picking at it instantly, whatever I’m sitting or laying on is too lumpy, etc. My scalp itches regardless of when I last washed my hair, but washing my hair sounds dreadful because the sensation of wet hair weighing me down is even worse (vs it normally being a soothing sensation to me). My ears itch!! it’s maddening and distracting.
noise and light sensetivity - everything is too bright and too loud! I’ll have as many lights off as possible (sitting in the dark, showering in the dark, screens all as dim as they will go; I’ll often close my eyes or blindfold myself if I really need to concentrate on something I’m typing or listening to). I try to get white noise because background sounds like the dog walking around will drive me batty, but white noise will give the same “wrong one” sensation as music, and if I notice ANY repetition in the white noise (obvious bird loops for example) unless I have deliberately chosen a repetitive melody because it feels right, I will snap and have to turn it off and probably just cover my ears for a while.
The sensation that shit would suck less if I was drunk right now, because that would either “at least give me something to do” or “make all of this funny instead of annoying” (but alcohol only intensifies what I’m feeling, so if I’m “good” manic it makes me super happy and if I’m frustrated manic I just get angrier)
just an overall sense that everything is wrong and there’s nothing I can do about it and unlike when I’m depressed, wherein I feel like it’s all my fault and I probably deserve to die because of it, it all just pisses me off more and makes me need to get up and wander around. in the less extreme of these moments, I end up trying to figure out lists of what needs to be done, but getting frustrated trying to think that hard. In the worse ones, things will be blown out of scale and I’ll be plagued not just by the problems in my own life but by how fucking frustrating it is not to be able to fix, oh, our broken government, or how frustrating it is that I don’t have the money to just buy us a house right this second, etc.
hallucinations - this is top floor mania for me. The only thing above it is the roof that I will sometimes lay on at 2 in the morning, limbs spread as wide as possible for minimal skin contact, laughing uncontrollably on the inside while feeling paralyzed. My hallucinations are “mild” ones - I’ve only had one or two visual flashes in my life, everything else has been sounds, and it’s rarely been even words, let alone more. it’s usually alarms and sometimes music. I’ll hear my boyfriend’s alarm going off, or the fire alarm going off, or my own alarm going off, or my family’s burglar alarm going off, etc. This is one that meds have been royally good at keeping under control and I’ve only had breakthroughs of it when I’m also sleep deprived.
-basically, mania is fUCKING FRUSTRATING AS ALL GET OUT because you have all this energy but nothing FEELS RIGHT so nothing gets DONE, 99.94% of the time.
The additional problem for me with breakthrough mania - that is, symptoms that happen despite my medication keeping me mostly “normal” - is that it rarely brings any of the positive aspects that make being manic at least fun in the moment, if not sometimes genuinely worth it. I can get a LOT done when manic if I can take advantage of it before the bad symptoms set in, and I suspect a lot of my current writer’s block issues are because I’m not getting the same kind of hyperfocus days that I used to. But boy do I still itch sometimes, boy are my shoulders craving for me to go rub on a tree like a bear, boy is my stomach cranky because I’m so hungry but eating food sounds like a horrifying chore because what if it doesn’t taste right, etc.
I don’t really know how to explain exactly what I mean by the emotions feeling stunted, but it’s sort of like trying your hardest to find the can opener because you know it’s got to be somewhere, but it’s not anywhere you’re looking, except the can opener is your ability to be excited about this thing you wanted to do, or is your ability to be mad about something you know for a fact you’re pissed about, but you get stuck sitting there just dully frustrated instead because you can only read the label of the can, not actually experience the contents? Or maybe like opening it and finding store brand, “no sugar added” peaches instead of the really good del monte overly sweet stuff; your emotions themselves just feel lackluster compared to what you know they can be.
If a lot of this sounds familiar - if you’re like, yeah I get really annoyed easily and get sensory issues etc but I thought I didn’t get mania because I’ve never been pulled over in vegas going 110 in a 45 and all the media presents of mania is that and crazy chicks putting themselves $12,000 in debt overnight and waking up with no recollection of it - then you probably have hypomanic bipolar. If little bits sound familiar but they always are accompanied by existential dread and/or the pervasive sense you’ve gotta keep moving Or Else, it could be some sort of anxiety disorder. Parts of this list also overlap with autism, or with ADHD, or with BPD, just depending on which symptoms you have.
By my understanding, the one cornerstone of any form of mania is that you feel like you have more energy than normal; not more energy than depressed you, but an actual excess. That energy can fade fast/turn out to be just a sensation and not actual energy, but the sensation is still there, and usually fucks with your sleep.
Hopefully that helped. If it didn’t, or if it did but there’s something else you want to know, feel free to shoot me another anon or a message. I might be slow to respond because my sleep schedule is currently fucked to three more hells than normal, but I will definitely do what I can to help.
#bipolar disorder#mania#bipolar#mental health#lyra's gone full on spazzbucket#tw self harm#tw hallucinations
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Why Don't You Shut Up?
By Chris Churchill
You. Why don’t you shut up? All the constant talking. And if you’re not talking, you’re grunting or squirting out some small amount of air from some hole. And that makes a little noise. Human squeaking. It’s terrible.
I also hate your mouth sounds. Come on, NPR. Turn the mics down. If your guests can’t be bothered to speak up, then maybe what they have to say isn’t that important to them? No more elderly people on the air if they can’t make enough air to speak louder than their creaking jaw joints or their slipping dentures. If I can hear the paucity of viscous saliva shifting in a nearly dead, albeit award winning, author or scientist or, (my neck hairs are standing up before I even write this) story tellers in your studio, I change the channel.
I once edited an audiobook (my own). It was narrated by one of my favorite people in the world. The complete lunatic, fringe comic and music legend, of early Second City, National Lampoon and often my car, by the name of Nate Herman. If you don’t know him, get to know him. He’d love to have coffee with you. I spent days cutting out every mouth sound, nose whistle, and popped “p.” Now I legitimately love Nate. However, by the end of that editing process, I didn’t want to hear his voice again for a while.
So when I tell you to shut up, just shut up. I rarely tell people to shut up. I try not to be a jerk. So just know that if I ask you to shut up, there’s an active shooter reloading in the next room, or I’m having an otherwise really bad day.
And if I hear another commercial where they poor bubbling liquid into a glass, I’m gonna drive into the lake.
And what’s that whispering thing that people get off listening to? Or it makes them feel good? It makes me want to learn how to track down people’s locations using only their URLs so I can punch the whispering people in the face until they can’t remember how to whisper.
Hi. I’m Chris Churchill for Misophonia Awareness Day. It’s the first monday in May in England. It’s in England so I can’t hear it. Misophonia is a real thing. No I’ve never been diagnosed with it. But I’m pretty sure that uncontrollable rage at the sound of a Coke opening in a McDonald’s commercial might be a problem. So I took the test. Apparently, I have a moderate case. My cousin Brendon seems to have it too. It’s a weird thing, huh? Sometimes, I can’t stand my own chewing. You too, Brendon? I have a theory that these sounds were presented in association with some sort of traumatic something or other. Send that to Science University! But don’t lick the stamp anywhere near me! I’ll fucking kill you!
Deep breath. Thought: I wonder, if we label enough stuff, we’ll everyone have a handicap? Is my mental illness a handicap? At what point does my severe asthma become a handicap? There’s all the philosophy and extrapolation this article will give you.
You ever have one of those mornings where the birds outside are just being dicks? Seventeen different songs playing simultaneously, and then, out of nowhere, suddenly we have a woodpecker? That’s not misophonia. That’s just birds being dicks.
Guys on loud motorcycles. Shut up. Guy with phone on speaker in line at the hamburger restaurant. Shut up. Dude telling me story as I nod politely, but definitely more and more and faster and faster. You see me nodding like I can’t control my neck. That means shut up.
Not misophonia. Just “shut up.” Two different things.
Yeah.
Shut up.
Wanna hang out later? I’ll take a pill and wear earplugs.
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