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kawaii-harrys · 3 years ago

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PICTURE PERFECT PART 2

Word count: 2k+

Warning: none but it's probably shit and angsty.

Part 1 here. Part 3 here.

Harry and Y/N sat in the dining room, after having run around for Christmas. It’d be the twins’ last one before they go to college. After Lilith had left the abode, she never contacted back to them, leaving Harry and Y/n in tears.

“Will she come?”, Harry nervously asked Y/N. The weight of mistakes was heavier now that he was unsure if he could ever mend them. Both of them had tried to invite her back over the holidays, only did all of the calls go to voicemails. Frustrated, Harry went to Lilith’s apartment, somehow figuring out where she lived, but she wasn’t having it. “I don’t know. We can’t do anything but hope for the best”, Y/N tried to muster the best smile she could.

“Mom, Dad”, Eric came down cheerily with a red Santa hat on his head as he jumped down to hug his parents, Erica following his lead. “Hey Champ”, Harry laughed.

To love the twins, came naturally, he didn’t have to think twice. For Lilith, he needed realizations, flashbacks of his mistakes to know that he needed to love her.

The Christmas dinner has been just like that Monday morning in the Polaroid.

Lilith didn’t come.

Harry stayed up all night, even after his progeny went to sleep. Y/N had tried keeping him company but had fallen asleep somehow. Harry kept gazing at the door as if it would magically open to reveal Lilith. The morning came up, but she didn’t.

The twins had started packing their stuff to get into their apartment. They had the same interests and got into the same university so they had decided to share a room too. Harry smiled in deja vu. It felt like yesterday when he had heard Lilith’s heart-wrenching confession.

Two weeks later, the picture-perfect family was now stripped of the two oldest members.

It was a random Sunday when the bell chimed. Harry had tried to keep his guilt-consuming thoughts to himself, telling himself that it was selfish to feel this miserable when he was the culprit. That Sunday, Harry was home, playing with Jake and Stella, while Y/N went for work. Harry stood up from the couch and went to open the door and shock befell his features.

Distant sea-green eyes, short purple-blonde hair, and short-full lips, all in front of him. He was so ecstatic that tears burnt the rim of his eyes. “Li-Lilith”, Harry choked out as Lilith swallowed guilt of her own.

She hadn’t meant to make her dad feel so bad.

“I figured the twins would still be there for their last Christmas with you guys, if I came back then, the festive mood would’ve gone down, so…”, she trailed off and Harry’s heart was clenching, relaxing, beating, palpitating hard.

He took a step forward and pulled her to his chest, tight. Lilith hesitated to put her arms around Harry. This man, who is her father, who had never even held his hand during a carnival, let alone hug her, should she bask in the moment and forgive him or should she let him struggle a little more.

“You don’t know how important this moment is for me”, Harry muttered.

He pulled back, wiping away his bleary eyes as she took in her figure once more. A girl who was barely half his height a decade and a half ago now reached his full height. He caught sight of a couple of tattoos on the side of her neck and the shell of her ear. When did she get so big? A little moment later, he caught sight of something, rather someone behind her. A tall figure, ash-brown hair, flat chest, and a penis. Harry watched the guy with scrutiny. “He is Lucas”, Lilith sighed. “Hello”, Lucas extended his hand, which Harry unwillingly shook.

“He will be gone now. Our only deal was he would give me a lift to my dad’s”, Lilith said, sharply, looking at the charming boy who lifted his hands in surrender.

“Geez. I’ll back off”, he laughed, jumping down the stairs and into the car where she was once sitting.

Harry had questions swirling in his mind, but for now, he wanted to keep them at bay. “Come in”, Harry forced a smile and stepped to the side. Lilith walked behind him, only with a small bag, but it was enough to make Harry smile. She was willing to stay, even if for a day.

Harry wouldn’t really admit it to the media, but the recent few songs that he had written were about his daughter, Lilith. ‘The grass is greener, under your feet, And I know I’m terrible, I’ll admit. I’m just another culprit at fault, and you, you’re my fleeting summer. You’re my picture-perfect moment, even if you deny’

Harry wondered if Lilith heard any of the lines, any of his songs to know that he was guilty. The childhood room was stark dark, but it wasn’t dusty or dirty. Harry and Y/N made sure to clean and air the room every day.

Damn, if that didn’t show how much they missed Lilith.

But Lilith had other interpretations, they missed her because they were guilty, because they overheard her express her feelings; if she never said those words, never let the walls know, he would not miss her. He would be relieved she was gone.

“Dad, I know”, Lilith muttered, stopping Harry in his tracks. “What do you know?”, Harry asked, gulping down his own saliva. “Matilda Brown. A mistake in 2003.”, she muttered and Harry’s heart was faster than a damn snake. “Li-Li”, Harry couldn’t even complete her name.

“You cheated on mom with some woman. Not a random one, but your fleeting ex whom you dated for merely a month before breaking up. It was a mistake. I was a mistake, you shouldn’t have committed. But now that I know, I can see it. It was difficult for you to look at me and not remember what happened. It was difficult for mom to look at me and not think back to a time where it was rough. But yet, your thoughts pushed me back into a dark place. I always used to wonder what was my fault, but who knew my only fault was being born”, she let out a humorless chuckle.

Harry’s heart was hurting, strings pulling painfully as he imagined once again, how it felt like to be in her shoes. A child who doesn’t know anything, but tries everything she could just to get an apprehensive nod from her father or get her mother to at least join her for a picnic where all her friends and their parents were present. But she fails again and again until she gives up.

Without knowing what to do, he just took a few steps forward and pulled her into another heart-wrenching hug. “I am sorry, I am really really sorry”, Harry said, breaking into sobs, although he yelled at himself to stop. In his mind, he was making everything about himself. Following the sound, Jake and Stella reached Lilith’s room. “Li-Li”, they exclaimed clinging to her leg. “Hey buds”, she smiled. It took them a few seconds to notice the new dragon tattoo on her neck and a little fern at the shell of her left ear. Harry followed their curious gazes. “That must have hurt. Dada said that needles poke into the skin to get that thing done”, Jake said pointing to the tattoo. “Well, it did hurt a little”, she said, rubbing the neck tattoo, “but it's fine”, she muttered.

Harry ushered the kids out and said, “Rest for a while before your mom comes, she’d be ecstatic to see you”

And then when she fell on the bed with a dramatic thud, she woke up straight at 8 PM, almost dinner time.

She changed into comfortable pajamas and walked downstairs. “You think she’ll forgive us?”, she heard hushed whispers from the kitchen. It was Y/N. “I don’t know. We did her way too wrong. I wish I noticed my actions sooner”, it was Harry.

Lilith knocked on the kitchen door to break them from their stance. Y/N smiled ear to ear as she lurched forward to hug her. Lilith broke a smile. This affection felt odd.

“I missed you”, Y/N muttered, barely above a whisper.

Lilith let out a humorless laugh. “Well, you wouldn’t have if you both hadn’t eavesdropped that night.”, she let out and both the parents froze.

Lilith noticed the shift in energy. “I know. I know every last bit of information I was kept away from.”, Lilith sighed.

“I am --We’re just sorry honey.”, Y/N didn’t know what else to say.

“18 years. 18 years, I felt so unwanted, I was 10 when I first thought I wasn’t supposed to be born, which is well, kind of true. At 13, I gave up everything I had because I started thinking that you guys didn’t even care. You know it hurts like a double-edged sword was piercing again and again. On top of that, I watched as you guys acted as the perfect parents to the other kids. I was jealous. I knew I wasn’t supposed to feel that way, but I couldn’t help it. Guilt, remorse and hurt. 18 years of feeling that, and I couldn’t even cry when I lost friends or became alone in this world. And 7 years of contemplating dying so at least then, you guys would acknowledge my presence, or rather the lack thereof. When this feeling surmounts to years, you want me to forgive you in one day?”, Lilith muttered, choking at the end. She was not the kind of person to express her thoughts, but somehow, voicing them felt more hurtful than keeping it inside.

Harry’s mouth was left hanging, gulping for air. Only if he had known.

Y/N felt guilty. Only if she had noticed.

“I--I, Fuck, Just give us another chance, even if we don’t deserve it, please, Lilith. I am sure we were the worst parents to you, but you don’t have to forgive us, ju--just give me another chance to be your mother”, Y/N muttered.

“I’m not here to forgive and forget. I am here to get closure. I don’t know if we are ever going to cross paths after this, but if we do, that will be it”, Lilith muttered, with a stoic face.

“P-Please”, Harry was crying.

Lilith’s heart was hurting, seeing the people she searched attention from crying. What kind of a daughter was she? She had promised herself that she would never make her parents cry, that she’d never be that kind of a daughter, but she was doing just that.

“D-Don’t do this, it ain’t fair for me. You still have four other kids that you’ve loved and who have loved you back. J-Just, don’t do this”, Lilith stuttered. She never stuttered.

“You don’t need to come every holiday. You don’t need to bring the boy you love to us. Just please come here once a while, just stay here, even if in silence, just please”, Harry’s head hung low.

Lilith couldn’t see straight with the tears blurring her vision.

She battled internally. To or not to?

“Al-Alright”, her shaky voice gave in. She had nowhere else to go to after all.

The couple beamed at the single yes she had given to them. “Don’t expect me every holiday. Don’t expect me to introduce my boyfriend. Don’t expect me to do things that the other kids would. But maybe if I marry one day, I would invite you guys. Maybe if I bear children, I’ll let them call you grandpa or grandma. And if I die someday, unexpectedly, you guys are welcome to conduct my funeral”, Lilith sighed, getting rid of the tiny droplets.

Harry lunged forward, bearing her into a warm hug, one that only Lucas had ever given her. Harry had a big smile, which she couldn’t quite believe.

As he parted, his brows furrowed for a while, “Anyways, who was the guy who dropped you off?”, he asked, with curiosity. He didn’t want to overstep, he didn’t want to cross the line he had just mended, but he was tired of keeping tabs on her, knowing what she was up to only from a third party.

“Just my drug dealer”, Lilith shrugged, Harry’s body went rigid and Y/N’s smile fell. “Joking.”, she raised her hands in surrender. “Lucas is a classmate, a guy I’m familiar with”, she replied, pushing her hands into her pockets.

Harry smiled, Y/N smiled too. As they sat at the dinner table, she took a better look at the house, there were new pictures, not only the ones with six people, but also with one another shadow-like girl.

The girl hiding behind her father when everyone else posed for the picture.

The girl was captured as a mistake while she was playing football behind the family.

The girl looked at her father as he, for the first time, tucked the rose that she had picked out behind his ear.

And under one of the pictures where the two-year-old girl was wrapped in a sky blue blanket along with her father as Y/N sat with two newborn kids, was written ‘picture-perfect’

She was glad she took up Lucas’s suggestion to visit her parents.

_______

Do you guys think I should do part 3 of Lucas and Lilith's relationship? Lmk.

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kawaii-harrys · 3 years ago

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We are meant to be, aren't we?

Chapter one

Time flies. But the journey through the memories still seems to stay the same. For once did Y/N wake up on her own accord, not relying on the alarm clock. It was chilly, as it had been raining some minutes prior.

6.24 AM, the digital clock read. One year ago, she wouldn't have believed that she would be here, in University of Manchester, doing something that she loved. And she could never imagine herself waking up before the alarm clock, and before the sun.

She started the day, as usual, looking up at the figure sleeping in front of her and smiled at him. She had an evil idea planted in her head, so she rushed to the bathroom sink and collected a few droplets of water. Slowly she rushed the water into his ear as he groaned softly, feeling uncomfortable and then his face screwed up and his eyes looked up. She bit back a laugh as she taunted “Look who finally decided to wake up”. “Oh shut Up Y/N! You woke up just now too.”, he muttered back, smiling furiously.

“Ready for Mr. Hoover's ecology class? I swear the assignment was heavy on me”, he sighed, twisting his face in discomfort some more and she laughed.

The early morning class was a part of her favorites, it helped her connect with nature more, or so she claimed. She just liked the freshness. Although she wasn’t an early bird, she did like both aspects of the 24-hr cycle. Waking up early, she felt energetic and productive. Waking up till late, made her feel connected more to herself.

“Wanna shower together?”, she asked laughing, as he stood up from his head and shook his head to wake himself up, “Yep”.

_______________________

Harry and she entered the class five minutes prior to the beginning of the class.

Mr. Hoover looked over to her once, and gave a smile that she returned.

“Why is Katy looking at you that way?”, Harry whispered into your ear. “In what way?”, she asked back. “Like, I wish she were out of the picture so I could be with Harry”, he whispered back and she elbowed him in the ribs to keep his narcissism in check. “You aren't getting rid of me soon enough”, she smiled. “It should be the other way around”, he said with a weird smile on his lips.

“Wanna hangout after class?”, he asked fifteen minutes into the class. “Sure, where?”, she shrugged. “To Starbucks?”, he questioned. “I'd prefer tea to be honest”, she looked at him, while he snorted. “What's funny?”, she asked him. “Nothing, Just something in my head”, he laughed again. “You're weird”, she rolled my eyes at him. “And you're mine”, he snuggled his head into the crook of her neck, as she internally panicked at the risk of someone catching them.

She let out a small giggle, as the class ended and both of them walked out, hand in hand, like two pigeons flying in love.

Honestly, the story would date back to years ago, when they were still thirteen, and in middle school. Harry was a very reserved, closed off dude, and too cool and ‘intimidating’ for others. But, in all reality, he was a sweetheart. Nobody saw him in the light that she saw him in. Their moms were best friends, which resulted in them having playdates, all the time. He would play tea party with her, every time she’d ask him, and sometimes, just sometimes, it intimidated her, the way he was a better person, all in all.

Once when she was six, she broke his favorite color palette, and she was super guilty and apologetic about it, and she felt her tiny heart break when she addressed the tears in his eyes. He didn’t say anything to her, but she knew, if it had been her, she’d end up screaming and crawling on the floor and giving silent treatment to him for three days. But, it was Harry. He was like a golden saint, incapable of doing anything wrong.

And he didn’t cry, didn’t sob. He just gave her a smile and said that ‘it was alright’.

Broken smiles are more painful to witness than tears.

However, she did end up gifting him a new palette for his birthday.

Thirteen years old.

Twisted theories about sex and kissing and fooling around would go around in the heads of the kids. However, Harry and Y/N would spend time running up a nearby hill, from where a dragonfly would witness them laughing about weird rumors, would see them in it’s pixelated visions, touch each other’s cheeks, and had seen them, digging up a hole to put in letters and precious treasures for the 8 years in future.

The butterfly over the nearby mush, hovering over a pretty flower, would eavesdrop on their conversations. “Hey, do you ever think, the seeds that we plant are actually the trees that have died, and that time is reversing for them?”, Y/N asked him. “No, I don’t think so. Because aren’t we supposed to go from small to big and not from big to small?”, Harry questioned, pressing his glasses up his nose. “I don’t know. Because lotuses never grow to trees; they don’t see the Sun more than once, they need to save their time until they decide to bloom; because, once you bloom, you advance to the end and there is no denying that”, she said, interlocking her hand in his, as both of them sat away from each other on opposite ends of a tree, their backs pressing against the rough trunk. “In that way, isn’t death the only survival?”, Harry questioned.

Y/N looked down.

“We are too young to worry about future”, she answered lowly.

“And yet, our future depends on the choices we make as young people”, he replied sighing out, tipping his head up.

The sky had been clear.

“Hey, will we be together forever?”, Y/N asked, looking down to her lap.

Harry went quiet for a while, as if his pretty brain was trying to scoop up a pretty answer. The butterfly made his way closer to them, choosing a flower next to them, as if, it too anticipated Harry’s answer. It settled down on Harry’s black sneakers. “Forever… is a long time, Y/N. For tomorrow though, I will be with you”

Two thirteen years old, out of their mind, with only one knowledge that, whatever they had between them, was normal, would run downhill and escape to their houses.

Fifteen was when it really happened. The blue swallowtail, perhaps a generation or two younger than the one who had eavesdropped on them, kept hovering around them.

“Would you…like it if I fell in love with you?”, Harry had asked, still sporting his glasses. How it flew out so effortlessly from his lips was still a wonder for Y/N, because she had been trying to write letters, find the perfect words and pick the best emotion to ask him the same question. But nobody could do the job better than him.

“I have been waiting for you to fall in love with me”, she replied back as his face broke into a smile. The perfect melody to his symphonies, and the perfect rhyme to his poems had been her, all along. And he knew it so perfectly.

“Are we supposed to kiss?”, Y/N asked, her hands pressing against each other and her head low.

It’s really surprising how, everything changes once you turn sixteen. You learn to live. But then you turn seventeen, and feel like everything is falling apart, and building up at the same time. You become mature, and comprehend things under so many different spells.

But, right at this moment, at fifteen, they watched the wet ground splatter mud on their shoes. He walked; she jumped. And in a perfect rhythm, two fifteen-year olds, under the gray sky which was about to unload soon enough, kissed. The touch of his lips on her had been soft; like the pair of lips were made up of the softest cotton available, and his taste had been like strawberry and chocolate. And willingly, she gave her first kiss to the first boy she fell in love with.

She spent her sacred moments with him. They discussed futures; but never did they plan them; for who could tame time?

She looked at the man in front of her now, grown out of the skin of a fifteen year old, and into the skin of a 21 year old.

There was a buzz in her pocket, bringing her out of her reverie. She looked down at her phone to see her mom calling. “Hey mom”, she replied cheerily. “Are you coming next Friday, darling?”, she asked in a sweet tone that Y/N never really had heard her speak. “Yep, I am coming”, she replied happily, it was around Christmas and, she was way too eager to visit her parents. “Not yet”, her boyfriend, cheekily mouthed at her and she shoved him to the side. “Well, alright. I-I love you”, her mom stuttered a bit. “Well, I love you too mom”, she chipped happily before cutting the call. “So, which tea?”, Harry asked her, grinning like a mad man.

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