#HIS DOG COLLAR yeah im sick like that

[finalgirlmoment]

he's a BAMF your honor

[queenjunothegreat]

Told you guys I was gonna start posting the random stuff I won't finish and I wasn't lying ( ꒪꒳​꒪ )

Finally, Leo gave in. “What's up with you, Beauty Queen?”

She blinked at him, like she was startled that he addressed her. “Oh! I just thought you told me you were going to dump Jason. I'm a little surprised to see you haven't.”

Leo chuckled nervously. Jason ignored them and just shoved his face deeper in his book like the slimy little coward of a traitor that he was. “Uh, I dunno what you're talking about.”

“Hmm… I suppose it could have been a dream, then,” Piper mused, then she gave Jason a sympathetic look. “You'd better watch out, Jason. I had dreams about Leo dumping all of his previous relationships only days before it happened.”

Without glancing up from his book, Jason said, “Piper, please. We both know Leo doesn't have enough game to bag anyone but me.”

Piper wheezed in laughter and Leo turned on Jason with a furiously betrayed expression and vermilion cheeks. “Dude! What the fuck!”

Jason closed his book and blinked owlishly at him. “I thought you wanted me to try being funnier.”

“That doesn't mean you should clown on me!”

“Oh, I'm sorry,” Jason said earnestly. “I'm just not all that practiced, so I figured I should start with an easy target.”

“Stop, stop, he’s already dead!” Piper howled.

Leo sneered at her. “Yeah, yeah. Just remember that I had enough game to steal your boyfriend.”

“Bestie, you stole a closeted lesbian’s man,” Piper reminded him. “Our whole relationship he was basically wearing a sign around his neck that said ‘Free to a good home.’” She gave Jason an apologetic wince. “No offense.”

“Not sure how I'm supposed to not be at least a little offended by that, but I'll give it my best shot.”

“We are ignoring the real issue here!” Leo interrupted. “Piper! Since when did you know!?”

“Since forever, dummy,” Piper scoffed. “I can't believe you two really thought you could keep this a secret from me. I'm an Aphrodite kid. I can literally smell it on you two like cheap perfume. And, Leo, really? Like really, really? You thought you could hide this from me? You couldn’t even keep your favorite yogurt flavor a secret from me.”

“It's peach, right?” Jason asked, looking at Leo.

Leo laid a sympathetic hand on his knee. “Sorry, bud, but it's actually strawberry banana.”

“He's lying; it's blueberry.”

Jason looked stricken and stared down at his hands. “I don't know what to believe anymore.”

“And you!” Piper pointed her finger at Jason, and he suddenly found the ceiling very interesting. “Next time you need advice for how to hide hickies, maybe don't ask the Aphrodite cabin when you're trying to hide your relationship from an Aphrodite kid!”

Leo frowned at him in disappointment. “You went to the Aphrodite cabin? Really?”

“Who was I supposed to ask?” Jason demanded defensively. “I don't have a cabin full of siblings to help me out. The closest I have are Nico and Percy! Nico's boyfriend can basically kiss bruises away, and Percy literally laughed me out of the Poseidon cabin. I tried to IM Thalia, but she just looked like she was going to be sick when I asked and hung up on me. I tried to call her back, but Iris told me she'd paid thirty drachmas to block me for the rest of the week.”

“Still though! You could have asked anyone else!”

“Maybe I wouldn't have had to ask for help if you actually kept it below the collar like you were supposed to.”

“Oh, so it's my fault now? Big talk coming from the guy who used my shoulders as a chew toy.”

“Oh, dog jokes. Real original, Valdez.”

“It's not a dog joke, it's just an accurate metaphor because you're literally an animal.”

“Honestly, I'm surprised that you didn't already know how to handle them, Jason,” Piper chimed in. “I figured you would have plenty of experience.”

Jason stared at her like she'd grown a second and possibly third head. “Why would you think that? I arguably have less game than Leo. I'm just tall.”

“I think you have game, babe,” Leo said, patting him on the knee. Then his face screwed up. “Wait a minute. No I don't! Fuck you!”

“Anyway. In case you forgot, my one and only girlfriend turned out to be a lesbian who only dated me because my crazy stepmom brainwashed us,” Jason insisted. “The fact that I haven't fumbled Leo is a miracle beyond words.”

“You're trying real hard to fumble right now,” Leo scowled. “Don't even know why I'm dating you, to be honest.”

”Because I'm mildly obsessed with you and you like the ego boost. And I also hold heavy stuff for you.”

“Plus you actually like his mother henning,” Piper added. She shuddered. “God, when we were dating it was like having a second dad. He just hovers all the time. I can't tell you how many times he asked me if I ate dinner while we were on the quest. Like, we were on the ship together. You know if I ate dinner, my guy.”

Jason pouted and crossed his arms. “Fine. See if I offer you any granola bars any time soon.”

“I think it's kinda sweet,” Leo said with a somewhat sheepish grin.

“That's because you—” Piper leaned over and poked him between the eyes, “are incapable of taking care of yourself, so you need someone to do it for you. Where everyone else sees smothering, you see the only feasible way for you to actually eat more than twice a week and get a full night's sleep.”

“Speaking of, it should be dinner soon,” Jason said, checking his watch.

“Babe, this is not how you beat the suburban dad allegations,” Leo clucked. “What kind of teenager wears a wristwatch?”

“Percy literally wears one everyday?”

“His turns into a magic shield that his brother made for him. Plus, he can't read it and even if he could, the time is always wrong.”

“What am I supposed to do then? What do you two do?”

“We just never know the time,” Piper said, rolling her eyes. “Like cool kids. Cool kids never know the time.”

Jason gave them both a very tired look. “I'm asking Percy to drown me and I'm telling Nico to make sure you two never see me in Elysium.”

“Pft, as if,” Leo scoffed. “We're your favorite people. Ever.”

Jason didn't say anything, he just pressed his lips together and furrowed his brow. “Awww!” Piper cooed, pinching his cheek. “We are! Look at that face!”

Jason puffed up his slightly pink cheeks and batted her hand away, getting to his feet. “I'm sitting with the Athena kids at dinner.”

“Yeah? Well, I'm sitting with the Demeter kids!” Leo announced.

“The Demeter kids won't let you anywhere near them after you accidentally set their roof on fire last week,” Piper reminded him.

“Just kidding; I'm sitting with the Hermes kids!”

“Okay, then I'm sitting with the Hephaestus cabin. I'm gonna get Nyssa to tell me any other secrets you're trying to keep from me.”

“Hey, that's not fair!”

“You two aren't allowed to just sit with other cabins,” Jason sighed, dragging a hand down his face. “You have siblings, remember?”

“Boo!” they said in unison.

Jason laughed. “Seriously, come on, you two. We do actually need to eat.”

“Coming, dad,” Leo crooned.

Piper arched her brows. “Kinky.” Leo gagged at her.

Jason ignored them both and left for the Pavilion, Piper and Leo bouncing along in his wake.

[boku-no-imagine-acadamia]

How about a Stan Marsh x reader where Sparky goes missing again and Stan is worried sick but finally finds his dog with the reader, who Sparky is now attached to

sparky is my guy frfr I was so stoked to see this request lmaoo

stan x reader when sparky goes missing

it was Saturday, and Stan had rolled out of bed at 10 am

he was barely conscious as he stumbled down the stairs and into the kitchen, where his family was huddled at the table

he cleared his throat, and the three Marsh's whipped their heads towards Stan

Sharon had a hand on Shelly's back, who's eyes were watery

Stan rubbed his eyes to clear the blur, and mumbled "what's goin' on"

Randy and Sharon looked at each other and sighed

Stan's father stood from his seat and crouched next to Stan in the doorway, and sighed "buddy... I-.... Sparky got out... again"

Stans eyes shot wide, and he jumped a little, "what do you mean he got out again?? we put in locks like... last week!"

Randy stood and walked towards one of the kitchen cabinets, where he pulled out a bag of... something as Sharon glared at him "yes well your father had a fun night at the bar and forgot to close the door behind him"

Randy scoffed and continued messing with the contents of his bag, "Sharon please, I'm allowed to have a good time every now and then"

Sharon stood and shoved her chair in "Not at the expense of our family Randy, you do this at least twice a week and im sick and tired of this, do you know how hard it is-" Stan was distracted by a knock on the front door.

he walked out of the kitchen and looked through the peep hole. Kyle. he opened the door and sighed "hey dude."

kyles smile dropped "woah dude, what's up"

closing the door behind him, Stan steps outside "sparky ran away... again."

Kyle quirked a brow "didnt you just put in locks??"

stan groaned "thats what I said"

Kyle put his hands on his hips "well then we gotta go find him, come on lets go”

And so stan and kyle searched all day, looking in backyards and trash cans and under benches, but they never found him

Kyle needed to go home for dinner, so stan was left searching on his own, but as the sun set, he gave up all home

He trudged through the neighborhood, holding back tears as he passed house after house

as he passed one in particular, he heard scratching at a window

He turned to one of the houses, and there was sparky, scratching away at a window

But it wasnt just any house

It was your house

Stan just about had a heart attack

After psyching himself up, he knocked on your door, and after a few seconds, you opened it

“Oh hi stan!” You opened the door wider to let him in, “took you long enough, i called your house this morning but no one picked up.”

Stan groaned “yeah, because we’ve been out looking for him all day. Why didnt you just bring him to the house?”

You laughed, grabbing a spare leash and attaching it to his collar “because,” you start leading him to the door, but once he reached the threshold, he sat, refusing to budge, “he doesnt wanna be brought. Marsh’s tend to like my house i guess”

Stan flushed, “haha yeah…” awkward silence settled for a moment “anyway we should probably get going, sorry he bothered you”

You smiled and put a hand on his back, rubbing it gently, “he can bother me anytime, he is my second favorite marsh after all.”

He stuttered out a goodbye and left, and as the door closed, he looked to Sparky “you are the worst wingman ever.”

[v-cain]

"Guard Dog"

Fandom: Xmen

Pairings: Charles Xavier x teen!reader, Hank Mccoy x teen!reader, Kurt Wagner x teen!reader, Scott Summers x teen!reader, Jean Grey x teen!reader, Jubilation Lee x teen!reader

Warnings: Bullying

A/N: this came to me months ago and now im cool enough to write it down. go follow my friends @book-place @bringinsexybackk69 (this is set when everyone other than the teachers are teens! ;] )

----

You drag yourself out of bed and lazily put on a hoodie, not even bothering to change out of your pajamas. Scott had convinced you to wake up at lunch time so you could eat with your friends, which would usually get a solid "Fuck no."...but there was a promise of chocolate chip cookies. So fucking up your sleep schedule it was!

Walking down the stairs, you catch a few staring eyes and shoot a glare at them. They immediately scramble away  much to your happiness.

You easily spot your friends under a tree and walk over to them, enjoying the afternoon you rarely get to see. Scott spots you and cheers "Sup Snow White!". You roll your eyes playfully "Oh hardy har har Summers." you sarcastically snark as you plop yourself down beside Kurt.

Everyone launches back into conversation, and you find yourself calmly smiling at the mess of a group you call family friends. Then, the fire nation attacked.

"Hey, freak! Did you force them to sit with you? Or do they just feel bad?" Your attention is turned to some random teen you've seen in passing- he was mocking your wings. Not a pleasant guy. Jean just rolls her eyes at him, while Kurt sits looking uncomfortable. Jubilee and Scott are glaring at him, and you're- well...

"Oi! Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?" you holler at him. This garners the attention of some nearby students who are now whispering to each other. The teen scoffs and rolls his eyes, "Oh, is this your little guard dog? How cute!" he mockingly coos. Your mind is racing a mile a minute but you keep yourself under control, and calmly walk over to him. The students are gathering closer now, curious to what's going to happen next.

The teen sizes you up and gets in your face, "You mad, doggy? What're gonna do about it? Bark?" You smile sweetly at him, and then swing you're tail underneath his legs. He immediately falls backwards but you catch to collar of his shirt and bring him close, "If you ever, and I mean ever" you bringing him closer "come near my friends again, I won't be here to catch you. Got it?" He nods vigorously. You smile sweetly and let him stumble backwards. "There's a good doggy." you mock as you turn back to your friends.

Sadly, the universe was not on your side, as Professor McCoy calls for you and the teen to follow him to the headmasters office.

...Well, shit.

----

School sucks, you think as you walk to the office. One moment you're defending your friend against some dickwad and the next you're being escorted to the headmasters office, which is complete bullshit! Sure Jean could handle herself on her own, but she shouldn't have to! Everyone deserves a friend who has their back. And maybe a little bit of your reaction was because you were sick of being treated like an animal, but who could blame you?

Before you realize, Professor McCoy is knocking on the Professors door- you wonder if they had to battle for who got the title of "The Professor"- and he opens it, closing it after the three of you are inside. Professor Xavier looks up blindly before a flash of recognition sparks in his eyes, so he sits up straighter and looks more serious. Glancing beside you, it looks like the teen (who's name you learn to be Doug) is playing the innocent lamb while you get the part of the Big Bad Wolf. Lovely.

"Can anyone care to tell me why you're here?" the Professor asks, looking between you two. Doug responds scarily quickly "Yeah, that asshole attacked me for no fucking reason!" Your eyebrows raise a bit- he couldn't have tried made his story a bit believable? The Professor sharply turns to him "Mr. Carol, I do not appreciate that tome of voice." Doug squirms a bit where he stands as the Professor continues "Now please, could you elaborate?"

Doug starts to tell a story how he was leaning against a tree reading a book, when you walked up to him and got up in his face and pushed him to the ground. Which is complete bullshit, but you wouldn't let that show. The Professor takes this in and the  turns to you, and tells you to recount your side of the story. You glance at Doug and start "Well, I was sitting with my friends, when Doug walked by and called Jean a freak. I got mad at him and shouted at him, so he called me a dog multiple time, so I told him to leave me and my friends alone and went to sit back down- that was when Professor McCoy interfered.

Doug glares at me while the Professor frowns. He exchanged glances with the other professor who come to some sort of silent agreement. "It seems clear who is in the right. Doug, you will attend detention during lunchtime for the next two weeks-" Doug turns red and immediately storms out the office, slamming the door on his way out. Dramatic.

The Professor raises an eyebrow and turns to you "Y/N, you will be in detention after school today. I understand wanting to defend your friends, but that wasn't the way to go about it. You may leave now." You nod and turn for the door, pausing and turning back. "Professor, I'm sorry for acting out. It won't happen again." He smiles and you softly and responds "I know, Y/N. Now go, I can hear your friends thoughts from here." You giggle and walk out the door.

You practically sprint out to your friends, who are still waiting for you to come back. Jubilee grins at you and hugs you tightly "That was freaking awesome!" you blush and meekly smile at her. Everyone starts asking if you're ok, but through all the chaos you catch Jeans eye and give her a smile that she returns.

Yeah, you probably shouldn't have done that, and yeah you're fucking exhausted, but it's worth it to see the smile on their faces.

----

Late at night, you sit up straight on the couch you were lazing on and exclaim to youself "Damn Summers never gave me my fucking cookies!"

[ad1thi]

2020 fic recs!! [Part 1]

this idea was stolen from @iam93percentstardust cuz i just,,,thought that this year was absolute shit and it would be nice to make a fic rec list of fics from this year that helped me through it. this will be over a range of fandoms and ships, but all fics were written this year. 

fics are ordered by the month they were published. ive tried to keep to five fics per month, but this is not obviously all the fics ive read that month - i just didn’t want to make this insanely long. 

im releasing the first half of this on the 1st of December, and the second half on the 1st of January 2021 - because otherwise it would just get so long (and also so i will actually have fics for December)

happy reading!! hopefully you find fics on this you haven’t read yet

***

January

The cat is mighty dignified (until the dog comes by): @five-wow

Steve and Danny find them on the pillow in the corner of the dining area, where Eddie is on his side, ass half on the floor because the pillow is more cat-sized than lab-sized, and Pickles is nestled between Eddie’s front legs, essentially being spooned and looking very I-got-the-cream about it. Pickles’ head is tucked into the crook of Eddie’s neck and Eddie’s head slots perfectly on top of Mr. Pickles’, like a furry jigsaw puzzle.

“They’re cuddling,” Steve points out, unnecessarily.

Or: There is a love story unfolding under the McGarrett roof.

Captain ‘Socialist Rage Muffin’ America: @baffledkingcomposinghallelujah

It takes three months of dating Steve Rogers for Tony to understand why Aunt Peggy once shot at him in sheer frustration.

Alternately titled, Honey, I committed treason again.

The Best Laid Plans (Of Mice and Men): @arboreal-elm-ash-oak

His Dark Materials AU

It was Annalise who noticed their small visitor first.

“Tony,” the spider daemon said softly, skittering up the collar of his dress shirt, two of her eight legs resting delicately against his cheek, “Don’t startle them, but I believe we have a guest. Look, by the coffee table.”

Fourteen Million to One: @tunastorks

Six months after Thanos, six months after Tony’s death, six months after Steve returns to his own timeline, Tony Stark turns up on their doorstep.

Brewed Awakening: @iam93percentstardust

Two years after he comes out of the ice, Steve is drifting through life. On his teammate's recommendation, he decides to go back to school where he meets the grandson of an old friend. He finds happiness with Tony but Steve won't be in Boston forever and someone is out to hurt the Starks. Will Steve and Tony be able to reach their happily ever after?

February

the young, the reckless and the foolish: @bruciewayne

In most universes, they don't know each other, not in the slightest, or they hate each other, in a way that's perfectly logical for anyone who were to find themselves in a similar situation.

In this one, they've known each other since they were four years old and naively idealistic.

This is them over the years, against the odds.

a giant sign: @areiton

“Think you can get him to open the weapons division up again?” his CO asks, his voice hungry and Rhodey laughs because this--

“No. Tony hung up his weapons.”

“That’s not what the suit says,” his CO objects, and Rhodey shrugs.

Tony has always had rules, rules he expects the entire world to live by.

And then there was Rhodey, slipping under them.

my heart is driftwood, floating down your coast: @nethandrake

Tonight, there’s a stranger in his backseat. That’s not unusual.

He’s also sad. That’s not unusual either.

What is unusual is that the stranger is silent.

(One night, a stranger enters Steve's taxi. Nothing is the same again.)

Just A Cold: @/delighted 

There’s a new text waiting for him. It’s from Steve of course, and it’s vaguely threatening as most messages from Steve are these days. Still Danny ignores it, and now he’s really playing with fire. Maybe it’ll burn the cold out of him.

Or, Danny’s sick, and Steve can’t stay away. The usual comfort fluff. With a little cameo from a gently meddling Grace.

An Unexpected Guide: @/Rachel500

Danny Williams has hidden his Guide status to keep being a detective, but his time of hiding is up when he unexpectedly finds his Sentinel, Steve McGarrett in the midst of a tragedy.

March

Why don’t we (Collide the spaces that divide us): @five-wow

When they finally catch sight of each other again through the milling crowds, they’re both a little worse for wear. Danny’s left side is covered in glitter and every time he brushes a hand over his hair, more blue and purple confetti rains down. Steve is- Well, Steve is randomly shirtless, which is all things considered not excessively remarkable, but he’s also covered in smudges of colorful paint and has a very nicely printed bloodred lipstick kiss mark on his cheek.

“What did you do?” Danny asks, because it looks like Steve had a lot more fun than he did.

Or: Steve and Danny accidentally end up in the middle of something entirely new.

A Little Unsteady: @finduilasclln 

Written for the Tumblr prompt meme : "Hey! I was gonna eat that!"

Tony lashes out at Bucky for eating his dessert. Only, it really isn't about the dessert.

a national treasure: @starklysteve

Steve isn't looking for an apple and Tony decides his passion is to inspire young souls. -x- OR: the AU where Tony is a Youtuber and Steve is Captain America and somehow they still save the world together.

April

cycle through: @ambivalentmarvel

Twenty-five years ago, Tony Stark disappeared from his family home a month after the tragic deaths of his parents, Howard and Maria Stark, leaving a billion-dollar tech conglomerate without an heir and the world wondering what happened.

Twenty-three years ago, HYDRA gained another super soldier.

Ten years ago, Peter Parker’s parents died in what is ruled as a home invasion gone wrong but he knows was murder, plain and simple, because he spoke to the killer.

And in the present, Project Insight fails, and the Iron Soldier pays the price.

FOREVER-LOVE YOU-I: @/Eudoxia

Tony Stark is twenty-one when he loses his voice. It shouldn't matter, but in a world where the first words your Soulmate says to you are marked on your skin, it can be pretty damn annoying.

Especially for Tony's soulmate.

--

Companion piece to my fic Thumb, Index, and Pinky Extended. This is Steve's POV, with a few extra scenes, as a treat.

(Edit: Sorry if you guys get multiple notifications for this. I just realized (about two hours after posting it) that I fucked up the grammar in the title and I HAD to fix it. YOLO, I guess.)

come build a home out of me: @maguna-stxrk

Steve clears his throat.

“What if I went with you?” he asks nonchalantly, like his heart isn’t threatening to beat out of his ribcage.

Tony blinks a few times, looking at Steve, his mouth ajar. “As a— As my date?”

“Yeah.” Steve nods, feeling a little breathless.

“You don’t mind?” Tony furrows his eyebrows.

“I don’t. In fact, you can just tell them I’m your boyfriend. I’m sure they’ll back off, wouldn’t they?”

What.

“I— Huh?” Tony stares at him, brown eyes blown wide open.

What. What. What.

“Huh? Uh, I mean— You know, that way people will see that you have definitely moved on. Monica will see that you have moved on. Right?” Steve smiles, hoping that it masks his inner panic, because what?

Steve Rogers, what have you done?

i don’t have a choice (but i’d still choose you): @nethandrake

There’s a name inked onto his chest, a name written in an all-too familiar scrawl. And it’s— It’s—

Steve doesn’t realize his body is quaking until he’s tracing the tattoo with a shaky finger.

Because of course that is the name etched into the skin. Like a brand, a reminder for everything he has done. An appropriate retribution.

Anthony Edward Stark.

(When Thanos snaps half of the universe away, he unknowingly leaves the other half with soulmarks.)

ua haʻalele ʻoe iaʻu (a ua hoʻomālamalama ʻoe iaʻu): @just-fandomthings

"The truth is, I was shot in the chest and nearly died, and not even three days after I was released from the hospital, you up and left-- and of those two, I'm not sure which one hurt me worse!"

(Coda to 10x22 because come on, we all need a better ending than the one given to us.)

Title loosely translates to: "You left me in the dark (you lit me up)" -- inspired by the brilliant song "Say You Won't Let Go" by James Arthur

May

A Piece Of The Past: @hddnone

It had been so many years since Bucky had gone undercover in the Stark family's mob, he thought he'd gotten away clean.

Then Tony Stark slid into the seat across from him at his breakfast diner, and Bucky's boss has a new case for him.

the privilege of loving you: @starklysteve

“Why won’t you let me touch you?”

It’s a desperate plea, half-shouted and half-whispered, Steve’s voice cracking at the end. Tony stops in his tracks, halfway to the stairs. He doesn’t dare to turn back, and he really doesn’t want to fight, or to leave, to spend the last month of his life away from his husband and their son. But Steve can’t know, can he?

-x-

Or: Tony has palladium poisoning, but he doesn't tell Steve and Peter

your pillow feels so soft now (but still you must advance): @firebrands

When Bruce is 13, he decides to go to boarding school. It's an opportunity for him to learn about other people, and how to interact with them.

Bruce has the misfortune of meeting Tony Stark upon his arrival in Roxbury. Bruce is moving into his room, and Tony opens the door of his room to watch. He looks a bit younger than Bruce, hair wild and eyes bright. Bruce has never seen a boy like him before—handsome and confident.

Bruce doesn’t like it.

IMPORTANT: This fic has them meeting at 14, then progresses slowly until they’re 17. Includes underage drinking and kissing.

This is set before Bruce becomes Batman and Tony becomes Iron Man and I have no explanation as to how or why they just DO Canonically, Bruce is 17 when he finishes school and goes around the world to train, so we're sticking with that

The Real MVP: @sword-and-stars (part of a series)

[“I have saved this Tuesday!” Sokka announces, rattling the bag upon reentry.

Zuko doesn’t even look up from his phone as he deadpans, “It’s Thursday.”

Okay, so Sokka is still having trouble getting his days right without checking. At least he’s gone back to sleeping at night! Going to bed at night is way easier when you have a cute, cuddly boyfriend who starts falling asleep around eleven o’clock. It also helps that he and Zuko are on solid gold butt-touching terms.

It’s been a while since Sokka has been on butt-touching terms with someone and it’s amazing.]

Or,

Sokka knows a guy, gets laid, and introduces Zuko to the merits of an afternoon delight.

When is a bed not a bed? (When you’re not in it): @riotwritesthings

There’s a tiny safe house, with one tiny window and one tiny couch.

And one tiny little bed.

June

Nice Fingers: @anthonyed

A single compliment given by Tony stirs Bucky restless until he caves in and asks him out on a date.

With Steve’s help of course (whether he likes it or not).

The Darkest Touch: @starkrogerrs

This is the story of how Steve finds that it has been ordained that he is to marry a monster he cannot resist aka the God of Love himself, Tony.

It's Cupid x Psyche retold, but with thrice the amount of porn.

The Night Shift:  @weethreequarter

Welcome to the Emergency Department of San Antonio General where Dr. Tony Stark joins the team fresh from his most recent tour in Afghanistan and - much to the consternation of the other staff - strikes up an instant rapport with Nurse Steve Rogers. Meanwhile, new resident Bruce Banner refuses to give up on his patient, and Dr. Sharon Carter learns something from her own patients. Throw in a pissed off hospital administrator, Clint using the coffee pot as a mug again, and a major car crash and you have, well, just another night shift.

Wind Beneath My Wings: @iam93percentstardust

Sam first meets Tony Stark in 2005 when he joins the EXO-7 Falcon program.

In jest: @/apathyinreverie

“No, babe,” Danny shakes his head with a grin. “If the apocalypse were to go down while I’m elsewhere for some godforsaken reason, then you stay put and I’m coming to wherever you are.” His grin widens. “And I expect you to have cleared any aliens or zombies or whatever else might be messing with us off the island and to have set up a nice, comfortable military dictatorship for us to rule over by the time I get back.”

It’s a joke.

Of course it’s a joke.

Until it isn’t.

(A the-day-after-tomorrow-style apocalypse AU, where the world decides to end right when Danny is visiting one of the other islands with Grace. Because, of course, it does.)

[tiddieria]

The 4 times Adam's dad thinks his son is dating Kai + the 1 time he knows

1- He doesn’t like to assume things about his son.

Adam has proved him wrong multiple times. The first major one was when he assumed he was dating Mira and the second when he assumed his son was straight. He doesn’t like to assume because he doesn’t like to be wrong.

So when Adam introduces him to Kai he thinks nothing of it.

And he continues to think nothing of the soft laughs that come from his sons room. Or the flushed faces when they come downstairs for chips. OR the elongated goodbyes with the front door closed.

Maybe he thought about it a little…

2- His wife and him had gone on a little date night.

They let Adam have some friends over while they were gone as long as they clean up after themselves. The night went well, the restaurant they picked turned out to be pretty good at a reasonable price. Enough for it to be considered ‘fancy’ but not overly expensive like some places in town.

Overall it was a fun little escape from home. But they were parents so there was always someone waiting for them at home.

“I’m gonna go put in Puddles, poor dog must be sick if being outside.” She leaned down and gave him a peck on the cheek before hurrying inside. Sighing he picked up the leftover boxes and his wife’s purse from the passenger side.

When he opened the door to the house he was greeted by a scene.

Mira was sitting on the couch watching a movie along with Skeet who was sitting by her feet. Next to Mira was Adam and Kai completely asleep. They were leaning on each other with Kai’s face smushed against Adam’s shoulder and one of his legs draped over his lap. There seemed to be drool sliding out of his mouth.

Adam wasn’t in a better shape either. His chin was resting on Kai’s head and his arm was over Kai’s waist. Some how one of the throw pillows ended up on his lap under where Kai’s leg was thrown over.

“Hey Adam’s dad sir.” Skeet greeted him.

“Hi kids, you enjoy your night?”

Mira nodded, “Yeah we were just watching Alien but Adam and Kia kinda fell asleep half way through.”

“Yeah they were totally passed out.”

He smiled “ Well Im glad you two had fun regardless of them,” he chuckled, “ You guys can head home at anytime don’t worry. Goodnight.”

“Night Adam’s dad”

“Goodnight!”

He smiled to himself while walking up to his and his wife’s room. Adam always used to fall asleep during movies when he was little.

Although he never really cuddled up with anybody…

3- It was around 2 am when he heard a noise from downstairs.

He checked to see if it was his wife but she was sleeping soundly next to him. Sighing he got up and put on his robe to go check. He was expecting to see Adam getting a late night snack. He’d have to tell him to go to sleep.

Adam likes to do that during one of his “grinds��. He doesn’t understand why someone would stay up this late just to make some virtual money.

He walked down the stairs and sure enough the kitchen lights were on. Sighing and straightening his glasses he got ready to scold his son before he heard voices.

“ Kai its fine really, my parents wont really care if you’re here.”

“I just don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.”

He heard some steps and shifting.

“You need to be away from them right now its fine.”

“I know... I just wished it wasn’t like this.” Kai’s voice was slightly muffled now. “ i just don’t understand why... why they think its better for me if they stay together.” Kai cleared his throat “If their just fighting all the fucking time”. Kai’s voiced cracked.

He decided to ignore the swear word from the teen and instead became incredibly worried. Who would have known that such a lovable child would be having this much trouble in his home life.

“ I know and I’m sorry that I’m not really good at comforting you.”

Kai let out a soft wet laugh and sniffled, “Dude you’re fine. Just being around you helps.”

“You can sleep here tonight. We���ll wake up early so my parents don’t see.”

“I’d like that..... thank you Adam”

“Anytime”

No other words were spoken but someone was humming softly. He decided to take a peek over the corner of the wall and into the kitchen.

Adam had one hand in Kai’s and the other on the small of his back. The other boy had a hand on his shoulder. They had their eyes closed and were leaning their heads together. They swayed to humming in the kitchen.

They fit together so perfectly.

He went back to his room quietly and when he found a note on the kitchen counter the next morning he said nothing about it.

4- He was finally headed home after a long day at the school.

If he had known how long essays took to grade maybe he wouldn’t have become an english teacher. He looks more like a math teacher anyways.

His wife was out of town with some of her gal pals, something about a outdoor spa in the next town over, so he knows hell have get Adam food. That kid never feed himself any real food just snacks.

At a red light he quickly sent a text to Adam asking him what he wants to eat. When he didn’t get a reply, he think anything of it. Adam usually forgets to put his phone with sound.

He’ll make his son spaghetti or something.

When he got home he expected to find Adam with his VR system in his room not sitting on the couch with Kai.

Kai’s face was extremely red and he wasn’t making eye contact with him. Both if their hairs were a mess sticking up in a random places.

He cleared his throat. “Uh hello Kai, I wasn’t expecting to find you here?”

“OH uh yeah?” Kai scratched the back of his neck nervously.

“Are you going to join us for dinner because i don’t know if i have enough spaghetti for 3 people.”

With that Adam quickly got up and pulled up Kai. “ACTUALLY, DAD. Kai was just about to leave.” His voice was strained as he grabbed Kai’s backpack and handed it to him.

“I was?” Adam gave him a look. “OH. Yeah! I,m leaving now.”

They both turned to him and gave him strained smiles before quickly turning around and going out the door. He waited for his son to come back into the house.

When he did come back in they both stared at each other for a minute, trying to figure out what the other was thinking.

He sighed knowing he wasn’t gonna get anything out if his son. “Do you want cheese on your spaghetti?”

+1

He was a little bit pissed.

This weekend he had to go to a english teacher convention because the school wanted him to go. But his flight was canceled and he had to tell them he wouldn't be able to go. Sadly he would have to go tomorrow instead and he had to pay for the flight.

He gripped the steering wheel the whole drive home, trying to calm himself down.

His wife said she was going to be out with some friends so the only person who should be home is Adam. He’ll be able to relax after talking to him.

He parked his car in the driveway, leaving his luggage in the car. Hes going to need it tomorrow anyways!

Going into the house he found it to be surprisingly quiet. Usually when Adam is alone he turns the volume on his TV to the highest volume. A little concerned he took the stairs up to his son’s room.

Outside Adam’s door he heard soft music playing.

Music at a low volume meant Adam was sad about something but when he opened the door with new concern and interest, he did not find Adam curled up in bed trying to shut out the world. Instead he found Adam and Kai.

Kissing.

Kai was sitting on the bed with his legs folded under him leaning over to Adam who was sitting with his legs off the bed. Kai had his hand curled around his face and the other on his chest, slowly going down. Adam had his hands on Kai’s hips holding him where he was.

He felt his mouth open in shock before quickly coughing before he saw something he'll regret.

They jumped and quickly separated from each other. Blush running up from the collars of their shirts to the tips of their ears.

“DAD!”

“SORRY!!!”

They looked at him with wide eyes and quickly tried to come up with an excuse of what he just saw.

He smiled before putting his hand up, silencing them. “ Don't worry about it kids. I’m happy for you guys, just wished you would have told me Adam.”

“I was going to but….”

He nodded, completely understanding. He turned around to leave before stopping. “ And keep the door open from now on.” He walked away as Kai screamed from embarrassment and Adam groaned in disappointment.

He's glad they're happy.

And he's glad he was right.

[peachyproserpina]

Wickedly Domestic

Chapter 2: Coffee and Traffic

John Wick x OC

TW: nothing really, mentions of anxiety

As always if I miss something or if you need something tagged please let me know

Anyone could tell that he had just woken up, he was glaring at her hair mussed clothes rumpled. Daisy yapped and licked at his ankles, “oh, yeah.” He stepped aside to let the dog into the house. Maria stood at the edge of his porch, wringing her fingers together she stepped fully onto the porch and bit her lip when she stumbled over the baby step up. She was trying to not stare at the handsome man as she brought her hands up to her cheeks to stop her nervous habit as well as hopefully cool her blush.

“I was uhh, out running at the swamp and the uh dog - Daisy ran up to me and-” She jumped when he stepped aside, gesturing her inside with a wave of his arm.

“Coffee?” John turned and left the door open, Maria let her jaw drop she didn’t think she would have gotten this far. Most people don’t give her a second look, let alone invite her in for coffee. Her round stomach and thick thighs scared most people away and this man was seriously gorgeous. She was still sweating through her sports bra from her run. She stepped up into his house following him into the kitchen very slowly. Clasping her hands tightly together she looked around one of the most modern and opulent homes she’s ever seen. She looked over the photos hanging in the hallway, they were all of the same beautiful woman. Laughing or looking pensive, as she made her way further into the home she noticed more pictures, this time including some of the handsome stranger who she could hear making coffee in what she assumed was a huge kitchen.

She was looking over his mid room bookshelf at her heart stopped when she saw what was one of the most breathtaking wedding photos she had ever seen. They were both standing there and she could feel the love, she felt like she was in the moment. He was looking at her like he was seeing color first the first time or like everything just fell into place. While she knew he was out of her league she always hoped she would manage to land a hot guy, and rescuing a lost puppy sounds like the beginning of a Nicholas Sparks movie. Seeing this photo somehow filled her with so much love and made her feel like she was going to be sick at the same time. Any dreams of hitting on the very fine apparently married man were dashed away. She heard the sound of coffee cups being set onto a counter and the tinkling of Daisy’s collar against something. Maria made her way to the kitchen, still wringing her fingers, a nervous habit she picked up. It was better than chewing her fingernails like how she did was she was younger but it was an easy tell.

She took her cup of coffee and sat at the island in the kitchen nervously sipping what was one of the best cups of coffee she had ever had in her life. She didn’t even like it black but there was something about it that she couldn’t stop drinking it. She chanced a glance over to him and smiled nervously over her cup. He grunted and looked down at his foot where Daisy was resting, tired from her adventure away from home.

“Yeah, I found her at the swamp. She was just wandering around, I don't know how she got there.” She was letting her words flow before she could stop herself. Her host kept staring on, a man of few words. “You’re house is amazing, I live a few blocks over and I didn’t think I would ever see a house this big in real life let alone be drinking coffee in it-” she paused to take a breath, it was like she was talking to a ghost. She couldn’t even hear him breathe. “Daisy is a sweetie and she did so good in the car, also your wife is beau-” there was a clatter of a cup onto the counter, she looked at him and saw his shoulders shake. She couldn’t tell if it was from anger or from sadness, but she could now feel the overwhelming heat come off of him. She shrank back into her seat and held her cup up close to her mouth. Knowing that it was useless if he decided to attack but not having anything closer.

“Was. My wife WAS beautiful.” He ran a hand through his hair and Maria felt her blood run cold and her face heat up to an uncomfortable level. How this man managed to bring out the worst in her she had no idea, she couldn’t remember the last time she was this nervous in front of anyone. She opened her mouth to apologize and he held up a hand. “She just recently passed. Just a few days ago.”

“I am- my condolences. I can tell you love her, I’m always here if you need an ear to vent to.” She let out a nervous laugh placing her cup on the table pressing her fingers to her cheeks. “I haven’t even introduced myself and im offering to be a fucking therapist that you probably dont need.” She took a breath and held out her hand. Closing her eyes she waited until he took it before she started up again. Maria didn’t realize how bad she was shaking until he took her hand in his. His touch was warm, when he wrapped his fingers around hers she jumped, she could feel what felt like ripples of electricity branch off from where her fingers grazed. It really hit home how nervous and sweaty she was, she bit her lip and cracked open her eyes. His gaze was fixed on where their hands met and when he flicked his eyes up to meet hers she let out the breath she was holding. He really was gorgeous, he was older, that was apparent. Sharp facial hair even though he just woke up, hard eyes that were brown and deep enough to get lost in. Maria wet her lips and she saw he followed the line of her tongue and she flushed.

“My name is Maria, I live just a few blocks away and I work at a bank in the city.” Maria jumped at that, yanking her hand back from his like she was burnt. John looked at his hand, flexing his fingers before watching her dig her phone out of her jacket. Maria let out a pathetic little sob when she saw the time on her phone. “Oh fuck, oh fuck. I am going to get fired! I am so fucking LATE.” She started up and rushed to the door, pulling her keys from the same pocket her phone was in. Her yelling woke up Daisy who was following behind John as he guided her back to the front door with a light touch on her back. She could feel his wedding ring like a brand and bit her lip, she should not be thirsting over this man. This man who was only being nice because she found his dog, this man who had to have admirers lined around his block, this man who just lost his wife.

He could feel the panic coming off of her from his front door. She nervously waved at him before backing out and making a run to her car, which she parked at the end of his driveway. Why she parked so far away from the door, he wasn’t sure most of the guests that came over were Helen’s and they always had no problem parking so close. If anyone who was there for him drove a car they parked as close as possible, trying to be intimidating. It was refreshing to have someone blissfully unaware of who he was, what he was. He watched her rush to her car and did a double take when he saw the delicate pattern of daisies wrapped around her right shoulder.

“The names John!” he called after her, not wanting to have the girl more scared of him then she already was. She stopped dead in her tracks, letting the timbre of his voice carry down her spine as he shouted after her. Letting out a breath she waved at him while she climbed into her car before peeling out of the neighborhood. He watched her speed away before closing the door and waking up properly for his day. He had to get kibble and toys for Daisy and he had a date with the tarmac and his Mustang.

[overthinkinggotmedrinking]

Puppy Love

Pairing: Reader X Dean Winchester

Genre: Fluff

Summary: Dean gets cursed by a witch on a solo hunt, and turns into a dog. But can this curse also somehow be a blessing? (Again, I suck at these, I'm sorry! 🙈)

Warnings: A curse word. I think that's it.

Word Count: 2313

A/N: I hope you guys like this piece too! I'm not as proud of this one as I am of Paper Rings, but then again I thought that wasn't great either until I saw that people actually liked it. So who knows. Maybe I'm just too insecure🙃. Again any feedback is appreciated! Also feel free to send in any requests or ideas!

____________________

Dean had thought that this hunt would be quick and easy. He also knew that Sammy and Y/n were feeling a bit run down after the last hunt, which is why he had gone alone, leaving behind only a note that said 'Going to hunt a witch, not too far from the bunker. Shouldn't take too long. I'll check in with you guys when I get there. -Dean'

He had checked in for the first two days, and now he was back at the bunker after being gone for three days. But there was one little problem. He was a dog. The witch had turned him into a freaking dog.

So there he stood, outside the bunker door. He had no way to get inside, after all he had left all his belongings back at the motel. And also, he was a dog. He saw that Y/n's car was gone, so he resorted to waiting for a while to see if she comes back soon.

As he found a place to lay down, he heard the familiar sound of Y/n's car rolling up to the bunker. He sat up and ran towards it, seeing Y/n and Sam come out of the car. They seemed to be deep in conversation so they hadn't noticed him.

"He hasn't checked in since yesterday morning. What if it wasn't even him who was checking in? What if it was a shifter?" Y/n asked, and I saw Sam give her his 'are-you-serious' face. "Okay, it was him, but it's been 30 hours since he last called. I'm just worried!"

"He's gonna be fine Y/n."

Seeing Y/n worried about him had made him a little hopeful that maybe she cared about him as more than a friend, but he remembered the situation he was in and let out a bark.

"Hey there, little guy." Y/n said as she slowly came towards him.

She picked him up in one arm and started petting him with her other arm. "What are you doing out here alone, huh?" She picked him up higher with both hands and tried looking for a collar.

"I don't see a collar, maybe he's a stray." she turns to face Sam.

"Well Dean isn't here so I guess we can bring him in."

"Except I am here and how could you let a dog in behind my back." he tried to say but all that came out was a bark. "Im letting it go for now cause I'm the dog and I need to go in, but when I'm back you're both getting an earful."

"You're an excited little puppy aren't you?" Sammy said, taking him from Y/n's arms

"I'm going to try Dean's cell again, and see if he picks up."

Sam nods and carries him into the bunker. "Come on then, let's get you cleaned up."

"You're so tiny." He says as they enter the bunker. 'As if he wasn't tall enough as it is, he's even bigger now that I'm a tiny puppy.'

"I'm not that tiny Sammy you're just freakishly tall." He tried to say but it just came out as another bark. 'Ugh, How long is this spell going to last?'

____________________

Sam had placed Dean on the kitchen counter, after giving him a bath, while he put together something for him to eat.

Just then Y/n walked into the kitchen. "How's the little guy doing?" She asked as she bent down so they were face to face, petting his head.

'would they stop calling me little?'

"Did Dean answer?" Sam asked from where he was standing near the stove.

Y/n lets out a sigh and looks down at her phone, her expression suddenly turning worried. "He still isn't answering his phone. I'm really worried Sammy."

"I'm sure he's fine. Why don't we wait a day, and if he still doesn't contact us, we'll go looking for him. Okay?"

"Yeah." Y/n replied half-heartedly, sitting down on a stool, already trying to call Dean again.

____________________

A few hours later, Y/n and Sam were sitting on the couch with Dean in between them, as they watched TV. Dean was curdled up against Y/n while she was busy trying to call him on his phone, eventually just giving up and turning her eyes towards the TV, though she wasn't really paying attention.

Dean had tried telling them it was him by barking and pointing at himself whenever his name came up, but it wasn't working out. He was keeping an eye out for any photographs of him, thinking maybe that would help. 'Until then I have to stay like this I guess.' he realised.

As Y/n started petting his head, he looked up to see her worried face. 'I wish I could tell her that I'm fine.' he thought to himself as he nudged himself closer to her, almost climbing on her lap.

"I'm off to bed." Sam announces as he gets up. "Do you want to keep him for the night or should I take him with me?" Sam asks Y/n.

"I'd like to keep him for the night, if you don't mind."

"Sure. 'Night."

"'Night."

Y/n and Dean are sitting in silence for a while when she speaks up, "I forgot to talk to Sam about a name for you" She says as she picks him up and places him completely on her lap. "I'll do it tomorrow I guess. Until then I'm gonna call you.." she trails off as she thinks for a moment. "Dean." she says with the sweetest smile.

Dean tilts his head at that. 'wait, does she know?'

"Because you're just as adorable as him. Maybe a bit more. Also, I know he'd be annoyed that I named a dog after him." Her smile was slightly playful as she said that.

"You and Sammy are so dead once I'm back to normal." He said, again as a bark.

Y/n's expression changes as she gets lost in her thoughts, her brows knitting together in a frown. "I'm really worried about him. I know he's the best hunter in the country, maybe the world. But just the thought of anything going wrong with the hunt and me not being there to help in any way I can and then loosing him because of it-" Her voice breaks slightly at the end. She swallows before continuing, "I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened to him while I wasn't there to help."

Dean felt his heart skip a beat. 'I knew she cared about me, but I never realised that she cared so deeply.'

"That too, before I could tell him I love him"

'Wait. Did I hear her right? Did she just say she loves me?'

"Not that I expect him to feel the same way, or that I would ever even have the guts to say it to him. But I just need him to know how much he means to me. How seeing him smile makes me so happy. He needs to know that he deserves the world, and so much more. And that he means everything to me. I love how selfless he is, how he's ready to give his all to help even one person, even though he's already given more than enough. I love how -" she stopped suddenly and looked down and Dean.

At this point she had tears in her eyes, and so did he. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

Y/n quickly sniffled and dried her eyes. "Look at me. I'm confessing all my feelings to you but when Dean is in front of me I can't get a word out." She picked him up to look him in his eyes, "I probably bored you didn't I."

Dean was too shocked to protest.

"Come on let's go to bed." She said as she took him to his room.

____________________

When Dean woke up, the first thing he felt was a body in his arms. The smell reminded him of Yn so he snuggled in closer with a soft smile on his face. He was about to fall back asleep when he suddenly realised, 'Arms?'. He opened his eyes to look under the blanket, just to see that he was back to being a human. But since he hadn't been wearing any clothes as a puppy, he was completely naked. 'Well atleast the spell didn't last too long.'

He was trying to get out of bed without waking you, when his leg got stuck in the blanket and he fell with a loud thud. 'Great'

Y/n stirred around, disturbed by the noise, and eventually woke up. "Dean?" She asked reach her hand across her bed. When she didn't feel anything she sat up, and that's when she noticed 'Human' Dean, on her floor, butt naked.

She immediately covered her eyes, after letting out a yelp, her cheeks heating up. "What is going on? When did you come back? And why are you NAKED IN MY ROOM?"

"Well I-"

"You know what, go get dressed first. Explain it to me later."

As soon as she heard the door click shut she dropped her hands. She was sure her face was completely red at that point. She was about to get up to go look for the puppy, when her door suddenly opened again.

Dean stood there in only a bath robe and pajamas.

"When I said get dres-" Y/n's words are cut short when Dean comes in and cups her face in his hands. Looking into her eyes he asked, "Did you mean it?"

"W-What?" The proximity was making her nervous.

His eyes slipped to her lips for a second, then they were back up to her eyes. "Everything you said last night. Did you mean it? Do you really love me?"

"How d-do you? W-What?" She was incredibly confused now. 'how does he know that?'

"Do you really love me?"

"Y-yes"

As soon as the word left her lips, she felt Dean's lips on hers. Her eyes opened wide in shock, eye brows shooting up. But after a few seconds, she took in what was happening and melted into him. It was so much more than anything she could've ever imagined. She felt like all the cliche things she'd read about in books were coming true. As they broke apart for air, she kept her eyes closed for a few more seconds, holding on to that feeling.

When she opened her eyes, she found Dean's piercing green eyes looking into hers. "I love you too, sweetheart." He said, leaning down to peck her on the lips again.

Hearing him say that caused a slight giggle to escape her lips. She'd never felt this happy or hopeful.

As she came back down from the high, she remembered last night. She smacks him playfully on his chest, "Where the hell have you been? You had me worried sick. Also, how did you know what I said last night?" She pulled away from him a bit to look around the room, "And where's Dean?" She turned back to him, realising he doesn't know about the puppy yet. "Not you, the puppy me and Sammy brought in yesterday. I named him after you."

"Well I'll explain all that, and answer all your other questions in the kitchen with Sammy. Come on."

____________________

"So you were the puppy that we brought in yesterday?" Sammy asked with a confused look.

"Yup." Dean answered.

"The witch you were hunting turned you into a puppy?"

"Sure did. Thankfully, it seems like it only lasted 48 hours."

"So is the witch still alive?" It was Y/n asking the question this time.

"Yeah, we have to go back and finish the hunt."

Sam folded his arms, still looking a bit confused he said "Okay. Wow. That's some wierd information to take in."

Y/n expression suddenly turned shocked, "Wait a minute. So when I said all that stuff to the puppy last night, I was saying it to you, and you remember it all?"

"Yes, sweetheart." Dean replied, this time with a smirk.

"Well, fuck." Y/n dropped her head into her hands.

Dean walked closer to her, pulling her hands away from her face, "No need to be embarrassed, sweetheart. I'm glad you said all that. Gave me the courage to do what I did this morning."

Y/n smiled at that. Sam cleared his throat, "So, should we get packed for the hunt and get it over with?"

"Yeah. Also, don't ever bring a dog into the bunker behind my back again." Dean said, trying to give Sammy a stern look.

Sammy just walked out the kitchen saying, "Wasn't the first time, won't be the last."

"What? Sammy! SAM!" Dean tried calling out but Sam just walked off. "I'm going to have a talk with him."

Dean turned around to Y/n to see she had the biggest smile on her face. "And you too.", he said, his smile matching hers.

"I couldn't just leave you out there, you looked too adorable." She leaned up to kiss the corner of his mouth. "I'm still really embarrassed about last night." She said as she hid her face in his neck.

"Well then, why don't I tell you why I love you while we get ready for the hunt?"

"I have a feeling it's gonna make me more embarrassed."

"Too late. I love how smart you are. I love how funny you are. I love how you laugh at all my jokes even if they're not funny. I love how you -"

And as Dean continued, Y/n, still in Dean's arms, felt her smile get wider and her heart, lighter. 'I might have to thank the witch before we gank her.' She pulled back and interrupted his speech with a kiss, and soon she felt herself get lost in him. 'Yup, definitely need to thank her.'

____________________

Tag List:

@akshi8278

(If you want to be added please feel free to let me know!)

[fanficsandmoregalore]

Dog Days - Chapter 1

*visual aid, not my pics* (Ben on left, kylo on top, Matt on bottom)

A/N: Please don't get the wrong idea about what this fic will be about. It will all make sense when i put out more chapters, i swear.

Summary: You work at a vet clinic in a big city near your small hometown. You want to become a vet but are only an aid as of right now. You love animals, always have, and you know there are plenty of animals in the city that need your help. But what happens when you meet 3 very strange dogs one day?

You were walking to the Veterinary clinic that you worked at. You didn't want to be late so you made a quick breakfast and took it with you. You didn't live very from the clinic so you weren't too worried about being late, and you were only a veterinarian aid, you didn't do very much anyway. Living in the city, you learned how much people really valued their pets. You had seen so many families bring in their pets that were sick or injured and the joy on their faces when you told them their animal family members would be okay always brought you joy. You had always wanted to be a vet, ever since you were a child.

You were taken away from your thoughts as you felt yourself trip over something large. You fell onto the pavement and scraped up your hands and elbows.

"Ow, what the hell did i trip over?"

You looked around you and saw a dog in front of you, sniffing you as if it was making sure you were okay. It was a black and white border collie that looked like it was mixed with a great pyrenees. You got up a bit and sat on your knees. You immediately forgetting all your pain.

"Hi there, buddy."

The dog stared at you, its tail wagging very fast. You smiled at it and the dog got very excited and jumped up on you. You laughed and pet it, trying to look for a collar. You found it and read the name.

"Ben, huh? Well that's a very nice name for a very nice doggy. I'm (Y/n)."

Ben barked happily and bounced around in front of you and then went into the alley that you were in front of, which you hadn't noticed until now. You looked at him with confusion as he barked into the alley, you got up and followed him with caution. You watched and to your surprise, there was another dog. It was a golden retriever. You squatted down and smiled at it.

"Well, hello there." You tried to coax the dog over and noticed Ben was trying to get it to come over to you as well. The golden retriever was reluctant but came over eventually. You read its collar and the name on it read Matt.

"Well, it's very nice to meet you too, Matt."

Matt's tail began to wag and he sniffed your hand before putting his paw in your hand. You shook it with a smile on your face.

"What a gentleman."

Suddenly, you heard a can rolling in the alley. Another dog? You got excited but the excitement quickly faded when you heard the dog growling at you. You did your best to remain calm. The dog was a beauceron/german shepard mix and had a scar going down the side of its face. You felt yourself tense as it got close and sniffed you. It looked at you and you noticed Ben growling at it, being protective of you. The beauceron mix had a collar too so you tried to reach for it to read the name. As you did, the beauceron jumped, then growled and sank his teeth deep into your hand. Ben immediately bit the back of the beauceron mix's neck and pulled it away from you, growling and barking at it while standing between you and the dog that had just bit you. You didn't scream out in pain, you only winced a little as it stung. Then you made eye contact with the beau mix and smiled, hiding your immense pain.

"It's okay. I'll be fine."

The beauceron's ears perked up in surprise and the it huffed and walked off into the alley. Ben ran back and joined you and Matt, who had been licking your bleeding hand. You smiled at both of the sweet dogs and pet them.

"I'll be okay, but i should really get going or I'll be late for work. I'll be sure to come visit you soon, though."

You told the dogs good bye, while holding your bleeding hand, wrapping it with some of your jacket.

After you were out of sight, Ben went into the alley to where Kylo was laying. He bit his ear as hard as he could without ripping it off and Kylo pushed him off. Ben let go of Kylo's ear and growled at him.

"What the hell was that!?!?"

Kylo huffed and laid back down on his piece of carboard.

"She was gonna touch me and i didn't want her to."

"So you bit her!? She was so nice! She just wanted to know your name!"

Matt joined his brothers and chimed into the conversation.

"I have to side with Ben here, Kylo. Biting her was way out of line. We might be dogs, but you don't have to act like it."

Kylo got up and growled at the other two, Matt backed up a bit but Ben stood still.

"Oh yeah, well how about you tell that to mister tail wagger over here!"

"I couldn't help it, i was excited. She's cute and you know how i am around cute girls!"

Ben and Kylo began bickering and biting at each other and Matt just sighed.

"We'll never be human again."

The other two stopped their fighting and looked at Matt, then each other.

----

Meanwhile, you were at work, taking bandages and gauze to wrap your hand.

"(Y/n), oh my god, what happened?!"

You looked over and saw your friend, Poe. He was a veterinarian at the clinic, and a pretty good one, too. He rushed over to you and bandaged up your hand for you. You told him about the dogs you met in the alley and explained that one of them bit you.

"We need to check for rabies! Maybe they had some other kind of disease! You can't be so reckless, (Y/n)!"

Poe was freaking out worrying about you but you just laughed.

"It's not that big of a deal. It doesn't hurt or anything anymore. I think I'll be fine."

Just then, your boss walked in. Poe was quick to rat you out, for your own good as he put it, and the boss told you to go to the hospital and not to come to work until they knew you were clear of any rabies or infection.

You left work just as quick as you had arrived and meade your way to the hospital across town. As you did, you made sure to pass by the alley again, and just your luck, Ben came rushing at you. He must've smelled you as you got closer and Matt came shortly after, both of them were very happy to see you again.

"Hello boys. I can't stay long i have to go to the hospital. But since I'm here," you rummaged around in your bag and the two dogs looked at you woth confusion, "here, i won't be needing this." You pulled out your breakfast and broke it up into 3 equal pieces. You gave 2 of the pieces to Ben and Matt who seemed like they hadn't eaten in days, and if they were in the alley, then they more than likely haven't. Then you got up and walked to the alley.

"Hello. Other dog. Are you there?" You called out, and sure enough, the growling beauceron came out from its hiding spot. It walked toward you and you smiled and bent down. You held out the food in your bandaged hand, this made the beauceron mix stop in its tracks. It looked at you then looked away as it slowly approached you. When it got a few feet away, you inched towards it, still offering it your breakfast. It looked at you again, as if asking for permission.

"It's okay, my hand is fine. I know you were just protecting your alley." You smiled at the dog and it huffed. It finally got close enough to gently take the food from your hands and then run off to scarf it down. You waited while it ate the food quickly and returned to you. You stared at each other and you held still, your hands on your knees. The beauceron mix walked up to you, and got closer and closer. Then it sat in front of you and looked away. You smiled and slowly reached for its collar, this time it didn't even move.

"Kylo Ren. Wow, that sounds like a very strong name." Kylo's nub of a tail wagged but he remained still, looking angry even if he wasn't. You giggled and the other two boys appeared behind you, Ben whining to get your attention. You turned to him and stood up.

"Im sorry, buddy. That's all i have right now. After i leave the hospital, I'll come back with something yummy for you guys, okay?" You pet Ben and Matt as you walked out of the alley.

Just as you had promised, you left the hospital and picked up some cheap burgers from a fast food joint. It was dark out, you had been at the hospital all day and now it was late in the evening, you were walking to the alley but something felt wrong, but you brushed it off. You were just outside the alley and the 3 dogs saw you. Just as you were about to enter the alley, a man came up behind you and pushed you, face first, against the wall.

"Hey there, beautiful." He whispered in your ear with a deep and gravely jersey voice.

"Get off of me!"

"Ya know, i saw you walking by and just said to myself that i had to have a piece of you."

His words sent a intense shiver down your spine. You looked over your shoulder slightly and saw it was a bearded man in a black trenchcoat and a ski mask, and he smelled strongly of alcohol and cigarettes.

"G-get off .... or I'll scream!!"

"Scream and I'll gut ya......unless..... you gimme a kiss or all your money. Heh, how about both just for safe measures?"

He pushed something sharp against your back and you cried out for help before the guy kneed you in the back of your right leg. He let you fall to the ground and dragged you into the alley.

"Now your gonna pay." He said as he lifted his hand, a knife held tight in his grip. You closed your eyes as he swung at you but you felt no cut. Instead, you heard a growl. You opened your eyes at the familiar sound.

"The hell was that?" The man turned and from the darkness emurged your new four legged acquaintance, Kylo. He walked closer, intimidating as ever, fangs bared and his eyes staring straight at your attacker. The man started to back up, forgetting you were behind him. You took the opportunity to trip him and get up to run. You ran over to Kylo and he made sure to stand in front of you protectively.

"Hell no! I ain't scared of no dog!"

The man sprinted toward the both of you but Kylo was a lot faster and ran up and bit the man's forearm. The man yelled out in pain and dropped his knife. He fell to the ground and Kylo made sure to stay biting on his arm. While he did, you rushed over and kicked the knife away. The man tried punching Kylo and that was a big mistake. Kylo let go of the man's arm and was about to chomp down on his neck.

"Stop!"

You shouted. Kylo turned to look at you. You were in front of the other 2 dogs and they were all watching as he was about to bite down on this man's neck. Kylo turned back to the man who has passed out from fear. Kylo huffed and turned back around to you and the other dogs, walking over and sniffing you to make sure you were okay. You kneeled down and hugged him tightly.

"Kylo, my hero! Thank you!"

Kylo huffed again and wiggled out of your grip. You laughed and pet him with your bandaged hand.

"Still not the affectionate type, huh?"

You got up to walk toward the unconscious man but were interrupted.

"Hey! What's going on here? Someone reported a lot of noise coming from this alley."

It was a police officer. He put his flashlight down the alley and you quickly walked towards him.

"Officer, this man tried to rob me and threated to stab me!"

You told him everything you could and he cuffed the man, then put him in his car parked outside the alley. The officer came back to talk to you.

"That man had a nasty bite on his arm. Mind explaining that to me?"

"Absolutely. You see, this dog named Kylo was in the alley and saw the man attacking me so he came in to rescue me."

"Well that's very brave. Unfortunately, they are out on the streets so I'll have to take them to the pound."

Just then, Ben, Matt, and Kylo came over to you and looked up at you. The police officer noticed their collars.

"Oh, are these your dogs?"

You looked down at the dogs who were looking at you with concern, you smiled and then looked back up at the officer.

"Yes, sir." You said happily. Matt and Ben began wagging their tails and looked at the cop with a proud posture.

"They are supposed to be on a leash if they aren't indoors or at the dog park, miss."

"I'm sorry, sir. I live just a few buildings down and they are very well trained. They always stay close to me so i was taking them out for a short walk and-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's enough. I'm gonna let you off with a warning seeing as i got more important things to deal with right now."

The police officer gestured to the man who attacked you and you sighed in relief. You thanked the officer and he went to his car and drove off. You looked down at the 3 dogs and smiled.

"Let's go home."

[purplesurveys]

1026

Do you like bacon? I’m not as wild about it as I used to be, but I’m still definitely into the whole put-bacon-on-everything schtick and I have no problem trying out novelty items that put bacon in donuts, or oatmeal, or cake, or whatever it is haha.

Have you ever wished for something to come true and it did? I mean, yes. It’s ranged from something as simple as “I wish it rains today,” to something as big as wishing that the person I like liked me back.

Do you like Rammstein? I’m familiar with the name but I’m not necessarily a fan.

Do you know a friend of a friend? Yes. I used to drink with Angela’s friends from arki. We never ended up being close but they were always great people to have a few drinks with.

Do you smile for no reason? I usually smile for a reason.

if somebody paid you a million dollars to get a green mohawk would you? Sure. I only stay at home anyway and that makes this whole thing not that big of a deal, honestly.

Ever had a BLT? Did you like it? It’s too basic a sandwich for me, but I wouldn’t turn it down if it were the only option available. I’d still remove the tomatoes, though; I never liked those in my burgers or sandwiches.

Are you in College? Not anymore; I graduated a few months ago.

Have you ever been to a State Fair? We don’t have those here, first of all because we don’t have states haha.

Do you like Youtube? I enjoy a number of YouTube channels and I certainly visit the site everyday, but I don’t like the way the corporation itself runs their website. It’s since become very different from what YouTube used to be.

If so whats your favorite channel? At the moment it’s Good Mythical Morning, but I also have a number of other subscriptions like BuzzFeed (for their Worth It series), First We Feast, Try Guys, PewDiePie, Anthony Padilla, Anna Park, a couple of channels dedicated to pro wrestling, some eating ASMR channels, among others.

Do you enjoy compulsively cleaning electronics? Can’t say I do.

What is your favorite small dog breed? Are beagles considered small dogs? I love them.

Do you smell bacon cooking? Nopes but I do have a dark chocolate macadamia cookie from Starbucks beside me that I can faintly smell.

Have you ever bitten anything for any unknown reason? What was it? I like biting on straws, but that’s about it I think.

Do you like the movie "The Master Of Disguise"? I don’t think I’ve heard of it before.

What is the closest thing to you thats red? A paper bag under my desk that holds all the artsy stuff I’ve bought over the years, like my coloring books and paintings.

Have you ever gone into a toystore just to play with the toys? That’s always made me feel like a freeloader haha, so I never go to toy stores just for that purpose. I’d sometimes play with whatever exhibits they have, but I make sure to go through the different toy sections too.

When was the last time you went through a Mcdonalds Playplace? Maybe when I was 5 ot 6 maybe? I went to Burger King’s playground way more often since we dined there more. Also, there were always fewer kids so it was more fun to play there.

Do you have an annoying dog? Cooper’s a beagle, who are notoriously big balls of energy, and so there are days I just can’t keep up with his energy and for those moments I do have shorter patience with him. It’s really not his fault, though.

What was the first comic book you ever had an obsession over? I was never into comic books. I tried for a long time because my two favorite wrestlers are into them, but just couldn’t jump on that train.

Do you like kids pop-up books? Loved them as a kid but I was never obsessed enough to have them for my own. I was content reading pop-up books in the school library.

Does anybody else think bugs are cool and interesting? I’m sure there are tons of people out there, but not me.

What kind of toothpaste do you use? Colgate.

Do you own a pair of striped socks? I don’t think so, no.

What is the most random thing in your bedroom? An inflatable pig.

In a normal conversation do you slip out Latin? LOL no. I don’t think I’ve done that before, unless I was singing something in Latin on purpose.

Can you sing? No. I’m not tone-deaf, but I’m not anywhere near decent either.

If so, what is the highest note you can reach? -

Have you ever been to the cream cheese capital of the world? I don’t know which one that is.

Was this survey random? Enough for me to have a good time with it, yes. 

Have you ever been in a parade? I’ve been to several Pride marches if they count.

What is your mothers, mothers maiden name? I don’t actually remember haha, so I wouldn’t be able to share it anyway. It’s a very Chinese-sounding name, though; that much I can share.

Do you have a different hairstyle? No. I just have bangs, which a lot of people already have. 

Am I annoying yet? I don’t feel annoyed, so you’re good.

Do you like soybeans? I haven’t had actual soybeans. < Same, but I’m sure I like food products that have soybeans in them or are made out of soybeans.

Do you press buttons just to see what they do? Hahahahahahahaha yes that’s me, I’m that person with the restless fingers.

Do you still play pokemon? I never got into the video games because I was never any good at strategy-based games, but I did play Pokemon Go for a while especially when I was in freshman year of college. Overall, I was mostly into the anime.

What is your favorite pokemon? Jigglypuff.

Have you ever put blue streaks in your white cats hair? I have a white dog, but I wouldn’t do this to him even if you gave me dog-friendly dye. Just not my preference.

Are you blond? Nope.

Does it bother you when people have a collar turned up? No.

Are your nails painted? If so, what color? If not, do you like nail polish? They’re never painted. No, I personally don’t see the appeal of nail polish for myself but you do you.

Are you awesome? I’ll let other people be the judge of that.

As a kid did you like Barney, Baby Bop, or DJ more? Wasn’t it BJ? Anyway, I liked him the most, then Barney. I found Baby Bop way too whiny.

Have you been to the Bzoink Forums yet? I just go there to look for surveys. I don’t actually try out the other features.

Does any key on your computer and or laptop stick? No.

Does fire excite you? Fuck no lmao, I’m terrified of fire.

Have you ever sung in a choir? Never.

Do you go to church? Until March this year, I had attended mass every Sunday all my life. When Covid hit, we started watching YouTube recordings at home. So yeah, no escape.

Have you ever had a theme (pirate, ninja, civil war) day? Like, in school? Yeah we had a themed day in high school once. I forgot what the actual theme was but I remember going as Lara Croft. In college, we used to go with color-coordinated outfits for Valentine’s Day, e.g. people who had dates can wear red, those who are single can wear black, those in complicated relationships can wear brown, those who had crushes but can’t have them can wear yellow, etc. It wasn’t an official rule, of course, but it was always fun for those who chose to join haha.

Can you touch your tongue to your nose? Nopes.

Have you ever been to Philadelphia PA? No. It has an amazing reputation for being a passionate wrestling city though; it’d be cool to go there and see a local show or two.

Do you think Orlando Bloom is hot? He’s not unattractive, but I just never had a crush on him.

Do you think Twilight is over-rated? At some point I think it was, but it also got (and continues to get) so much hate that I think that has since been able to balance out the initial overrated-ness of it. 

When was the last time you where sick? what did you have? I had a UTI in May, which I never would’ve known if I didn’t take a urine test because all I got was a high fever that never went away. Peeing was never painful for me during that time and my kidney region never hurt either.

What is your favorite number? 4.

Look at your toes. Sure.

If you are a girl do you hate girl drama? Idk what you mean by that. I never grew out of liking gossip, though.

If you are a guy do you hate girls who prolong the drama? -

ZZZ, im tired....are you? A little, but I have coffee so I might stay up for a bit because it’s Fridayyyyyyy.

Favorite indie music group? alt-J.

Have you ever pet a monkey? I don’t think I have.

Have you ever ridden a camel? Nopes.

Have you ever punched somebody? Never to hurt someone.

Do you like cupcakes? Love them.

Orange or lemon flavoring? Depends on what I’m consuming. I like orange chewy candies, but I like lemonade juice too.

Can you sing opera? Not a chance.

Touchpads or Mouse's? Touchpad.

Have you ever been to a Disney theme park? Nope, I haven’t.

[ifyougivearavenawritingdesk]

Treat You Better | Harry Hook

Dᴇsᴄʀɪᴘᴛɪᴏɴ: [Y/N] is a patient person- they got that from their father, Scar. So when their girlfriend, Mal, leaves for Auradon, they can wait it out; but Harry Hook, who’s been crushing on the feisty lion since they were ten, certainly can’t.

Pᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: Harry Hook x Reader | Past Mal x Reader

Wᴏʀᴅ Cᴏᴜɴᴛ: 1.3K

A/N: This is my first fic on here, so please, be gentle ;-;. I tried quite hard on it, and I hope it’s enjoyable for you! I thought it turned out a bit cliche, so I made a little quip. Let’s see if you can find it ;).

- - -

You shoved through the individuals warning the marketplace, sending those who protested sinister glares. You cursed the magic- or, more so, lack of magic on the Isle for your human form- you could’ve been an utterly terrifying lion, but since no magic existed on the Isle, humanistic animals didn’t either.

So, you were stuck like this- a weak pathetic human, with no sharp claws or loud roar to speak of.

Usually, Mal would get your through the marketplace with ease; if people didn’t find your girlfriend intimidating, they’d find her mother in that boat. But Mal had gone off with prissy princes and princesses in Auradon- but that was fine.

You could wait, right?

You went up the dock of the Lost Revenge, meeting with your crew. Uma, the leader, Harry Hook, the first mate, Gil LeGume, the second mate, and you- the third mate. You certainly weren’t offended by your role, and your cleverness and cunning certainly weren’t ignored, but you would’ve thought Harry, your arguably best friend, could’ve gotten you just a slightly higher role, eh?

“Ah, [Y/N], my love! We’ve been waitin’ on ye’.“ Harry said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. You snapped your sharp teeth at your friend, the only thing left of your lion bone structure, but he didn’t back off. Why would he? He knew you’d never hurt him. You’d proved that when you were both eleven and couldn’t bring yourself to bite him in the throat when he stole your food.

“Woah, there, tiger! Gil said. You sent a warning glare at him. “Sorry, lion-”

You smiled and nodded at the annoyingly common misconception, before noting the absence of Ursula’s daughter. That’s when you’d remembered- she’d been gone for weeks now. You frowned, but quickly fixed your face back into your permanent scowl.

“I see yer’ missin’ Uma,” Harry said, looking at you softly. He frowned, a look not exactly custom for Harry- you liked the insane smirk more, personally, considering he’d found he look at age thirteen and he’d fortunately stuck to it for your viewing pleasure- “we are too.” He said gesturing to Gil and himself.

“Yeah. Where could she be anyway? Whenever she vanishes, she usually comes back pretty fast.” You scoffed.

“Yeah, I know,” Harry said. “But- I got some good news for ye’, darlin’. Mal and her little crew are back- and we got their bikes.” He grinned at you.

You knew you probably should’ve been more excited at the prospect of the bikes that could get you out of the Isle, but when he mentioned Mal, that’s when you perked up. “Mal? Mal’s back?” You said, sounding like a happy puppy- or, a cat would be more accurate considering your heritage.

It made Harry sick to his stomach.

Mal had left you for that prissy Auradon place, and you still loved her. He truly couldn’t understand it. Cats weren’t supposed to be loyal- that was a dog's job. He snickered to himself- maybe he should tell that one to Carlos if they ran into each other- bloody hell, he was such a lap dog, Harry was surprised he was the kid of someone who hated dogs so avidly.

But, back on topic- “why are ye’ so excited over that bratty dragon’s return? She left ye’, remember?” Harry asked, almost angrily.

“I- Harry, she said she’d come back. And she did!” You said, eyes hopeful. Harry just gagged.

“Whatever. Gil, [Y/N]-” Harry forced his smirk back onto his face, “we ride with the tide- right into Auradon.”

You all cheered.

///

You three most definitely weren’t expecting to meet with The Core Four the second you reached the bridge separating the hell of the Isle and heaven of Auradon. But, you were focused on Mal- she looked so different...less evil.

You hated that. Your partner in crime turned into a pretty princess. What a shame.

You shook your mind of your thoughts. “Well, what do we have here?” You said, strutting gracefully towards the four VKs gone good. “If it isn’t our own band of VKs- or, ahem, forgive me, AKS.” You said, scowling as you jabbed a finger into Mal’s chest. You couldn’t help but chortle when the blue gem was dropped from her hand. “Whoopsies! How...clumsy of me.”

“[Y/N]! That was Hade’s Ember! Oh, what do I-” Mal raved about the Ember, and you scowled. What the fuck? She couldn’t even say she missed you, she was so absorbed in that Ember, goddamnit-

“Drop something?” You heard a familiar voice, and you grinned, and then, in unison, you, Harry, and Gil yelled out your praises.

“Uma!”

“That’s my name~,” She said, and you happily clasped your hands with Harry’s. Harry refused to let a blush slide across his face. Refused.

Mal held her hand out to Uma, who was holding the Hadesforsaken blue stone. “Uma, I need that.” Your girlfriend- was she even that, anymore?- said.

“And why should she give it to you? For all we know, you’ll just abandon it on an island somewhere-” You glared at her. “Like you abandoned me.” Uma put a hand on your shoulder, trying to comfort you, but you went on, Harry watching almost enthusiastically.

“Sure, Uma’ll will give you the Ember- for a trade.” You said, tearing a gold band Mal had stolen from Jafar’s shop off your finger. “You see this? It’s worthless because you broke a promise. So why do I need a ring?” You said, chucking it into the murky depths, refusing to shed a tear. You didn’t know why you were suddenly so aware of Mal’s wrongdoings- maybe Harry’s speech did a number on you.

Harry grinned but made it so you couldn’t see. And on went the trade.

///

You felt yourself waking up from something. Your joints were stiff and pained, and you saw that you were accompanied by some of your companions- Evie, Carlos...

“What happened?” You asked, before memories flooded back into your head. The moving fucking knights, the berry bush with Jay, Gil, And Harry, Mal closing the fucking Barrier- wait. “Shit. Where’s Mal? Where’s Harry? Where’s-”

“Right ‘ere, love.” You heard a Scottish accent from behind you, and almost instinctively, your arms wrapped around Harry’s frame. You weren’t overly affectionate by any means, but seeing Harry okay was a huge relief.

“Jesus Christ, Harry- I gotta find Mal-” You said, about to sprint off but somehow Harry caught you by the collar, your cat-like reflexes not working to your advantage. “Goddamnit, Harry-”

“No, [Y/N]. I’m tired of hearin’ ye’ go on about Mal. She’s not yours, anymore, okay? She’s with Ben, and she’s gonna pop out a bunch of prissy princes and princesses out with ‘im. She forgot about ye’, [Y/N], why can’t ye’ see that?” Harry went on.

“Because, she-” You thought for a moment. She had left you, hadn’t she? When she left for Auradon, she never even tried to send a letter. When she came back for Ben, she’d barely acknowledged you. And now? She was so absorbed with her rivalry with Uma, she barely knew you were there. “She...she left me...” You said, voice cracking. Harry held you close to him. “She...left....me...”

You felt like you were in a cliche romance novel they had in Auradon; the main character comes to grips that her former love interest doesn’t love her anymore and the main character finds love in the current love interest- but, maybe that was just how it was gonna play out.

“I didn’t- Harry, you wouldn’t leave me, would you? Right?” You just needed that final confirmation, jesus christ-

And suddenly, you felt lips crash against yours. You didn’t realize how much you missed the hugs and pecks Mal used to give you until you found yourself gripping onto Harry tightly and running your hands through his hair, because fuck, that felt nice.

You pulled away from him, smiling. He finally responded to your question. “That an answer, love?” Harry asked. You leaned your head against his chest, smiling softly.

“Yeah, I ‘spose it is.” You sighed contentedly. Maybe he could treat you better than Mal ever did.

He’d gotten the physical aspect right.

[cs-discourse]

since ghost wants a defending post i will also make one

hi! as yall seem to commonly know me since it was my user before i changed it, im star child. im that overgrown cow that's smearing names and causing drama whats up

i would be a mature adult and DM you ghost but honestly i know you'd probably just spend ages trying to defend yourself fruitlessly and also i have you blocked so whatever 

here's the screenshots i have available (sent to me by very kind users in the chat who felt i should know what was being said after i left) and my comments to go along with it

some background: this discussion was happening in a channel called 'real-images'. a place where you would not expect a conversation about docking to be taking place.

i clicked into this channel to see what was happening and as you know, with discord, it automatically puts you on the oldest unread message when you click into that chat. i was greeted by conversations about cropping and docking - choke chains may have been mentioned, im unsure, because as soon as i saw the conversation i began to feel sick and so clicked out without skimming through the convo.

i went into 'questions' and asked if they had a way of requesting certain topics to be tagged and that's pretty much where this begins.

first i'd like to say 'don't enter the channel' hey ghost, how was i supposed to know that clicking into a channel to share pictures would lead to me walking into a conversation about my trigger? are you really going to blame me for that, huh?

second, this was me literally asking slash 'speaking up' about the topic. why was there any need to get this passive aggressive over it? i put in a request. you could have said yes. you could have said no. you could have said 'sorry we can't blacklist it but we'll try to ask people to spoil it or put a warning'. instead you told me to 'go off' and put :) which yeah we all know what that emoji means you weren't being friendly or subtle

we all know neons a big advocate for choke chains and shock collars as well as whole host of other mistreating animals. i'll make a second submission on that if people care but neons animal care? whack. bro i hope you grow up and learn to look after your pets.

anyway, mods please tell me why neon was allowed to get involved and say 'they just let their opinions get the better of them and speak out of turn' to be greeted with agreements and being told it was fine when it really wasn't fine.

Spooky Rabbit, i dont know who you are but you're cool. you made me a little less upset but it was a little too late bud

it's really nice how this convenient controversial chat only popped up after i started talking about the way i was treated in another chat huh. a whole half hour later when i'd already posted screenshots and vented and let people know what happened. love the damage control here

anyway

'speak up' once again yeah i did that and look where it got us all, Joke

something said to me outside of cottontails but this is in retaliation to the 'why didnt you speak up earlier' other than the simple fact i wasnt there lol. neon always likes to talk about these nasty little dog topics. if i'd butted into a convo i hadnt been a part of previously and said 'can we not discuss this?' i'd love to bet a whole 25$ that ghost would've told me to just mute the channel, or neon would've ignored me or told me to "just not argue uwu". either way y'all were going to get angry at me for my trigger. 

'don't want to butt in with my opinion but-' neon all you ever literally do is butt into conversations its practically your only personality trait other than mistreating ur animals lol. 'made things difficult' 'i'm vocal about my opinions' and then telling me to shut up about mine? okay if you say so.

Adam, 'we can't blacklist every topic users find uncomfortable' I'd like to point out again that a literal trigger is something very different to being uncomfortable! and on top of that it wasn't like i was asking you to trigger tag mentions of a popular character, or a food, or a language, or a colour. i was asking you to trigger tag a very controversial conversation centered around cropping, docking, and choke chains. an extremely heavy topic. not a minor inconvenience.

cool cool yall were making fun of ppl with triggers. nice

from a PM from cinna after i PM'd her about transfering my rabbit out of species - no cinna, they weren't blunt, they were just mean. simple as.

ik ppl dont wanna read text walls so this is mostly at ghost who claims im a harrasser and an abuser because i dont like neon using choke chains and shock collars

oh!! also conviently gonna add that "come for our side of the story" - you know one of your staff did that right? they went to a species owner of a species im involved in and tried to get me banned for causing drama? but didnt give any information or screenshots, and i had to provide them all to the owner to make sure the whole story was out? convenient how you just forget screenshots when they make you look bad.

this is long so

tl;dr ghost was p nasty abt the convo. they made fun of people being sensitive. they told me my trigger was a minor inconvenience and not important enough to tag. they only added a controversial topic after i kicked off because they didnt want their asses in trouble. neon got involved and isnt even staff so idk why they did.

anyway that's the news from your local drama queen, im gonna go chew on some grass now moo moo bitch

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

u guys know how crystalisks change color depending on element?

ohhh yeah

tl;dr: i went off on crystalisks for a while, started talking about vault monsters/guardians and siren tattoos, bloodwing, krieg, the elemental hierarchy, the bandits that got mutated by the vault key piece, the eridian ruins powering up, the moon [elpis] being teleported in that new vid we got with steve and claptrap, i rant about eleseer and technologically created pocket dimensions (heyo), and also there’s commander lily spoilers in here so be warned

i talked about a lot of things. i promise i linked them all together. somehow.

so we got the normal crystalisks that do explosive stuff

got Blue (the aptly named big blue crystalisk) that deals shock damage

(we also see a few more in hayter’s folly)

got Rouge the red one that deals fire damage

I’m honestly surprised we haven’t seen any green crystalisks since they’re pretty common in the caustic caverns.

anyway the reason im bringing this up now is because a very very long time ago (jesus christ, 2017) i had a theory that crystalisks were kinda like pets to the Eridians, like guard dogs of the ruins in the caustic caverns. which could explain why they were friendly (iirc Blue was even playing fetch with Booth) until Dahl started mining them

mostly cause of the guardian ruins everywhere

also, they show up in the Vault of the Warrior, as well. which is curious.

the other reason im bringing this up now is because im wondering if their crystals have any relation whatsoever to the purple crystals we see sprouting out of the ground in bl3.

they hang out in the ground when not active, mimicking said crystals, and there are yellow crystals sprouting out of the ground in bl2 that, when meleed, produce the same crystals crystalisks do when they die. (tho now im wondering if we’ve just been senselessly murdering crystalisk babies :|)

bonus: we know threshers are native to elpis, not pandora, and their blood is green. Crystalisk blood is blue, which could possibly hint at the fact they’re an alien species to Pandora. AFAIK rakk, skag, bullymong, stalker, and spiderant blood is all red. and so is bandit blood. (unless they’ve been huffing Eridium sludge like Zarpedon. then it glows purple i guess.)

anyway

you guys know how vault monsters change color based on element?

just recently fought this bad boy so i have a plethora of pictures

(this one is cryo)

(slag/base- which you know, makes sense. gotta slag em before u can swap guns)

(this one is shock)

nasty boy

also, interesting to note: we never got ‘explosive’ as an element with the sentinel and in bl3, explosive was taken out of the element list

you know how Siren tattoos also change color based on element?

sorry i would show amara’s green/corrosive tattoos BUT this was the leaked clip that i had on hand

ohhhh yeah.

now we know Siren tattoos are blue when using their base powers. according to amara, this blue means electricity is the ‘base’ element for sirens (which just plain isn’t true given what we’ve seen with maya and lilith, unless they show that further in bl3 where lilith uses phasewalk without her tattoos going red... which I’m guessing will not happen lol)

which has me like 🤔

we know in the original borderlands the vault key is blue for the vault of the destroyer

in all it’s technological glory

then it changes to purple in bl2. and apparently, we even get red in bl3.

so i know what you’re thinking “well blue must be the base element then” but imma posit that it’s actually not

We know the sentinel, when it comes out of the Vault, the first element it is is ‘purple’ (aka slag/eridium i guess, since slag isn’t in TPS). which, as we said above, makes sense.

we know the Warrior was a biological weapon built/modified by the Eridians for... some reason. It was under complete control of whoever opened the Vault. (the warrior actually has 2 elements afaik, the slag tail/wings and the fire)

I wanna say we were SUPPOSED to open the Vault of the Warrior first. Then open the Vault of the Destroyer and annihilate it with our new cool biological weapon

so then the order would be purple -> blue -> uhhh something something

oh and Siren tattoos appear to always be purple when interacting with Eridium stuff

like when Lily touches the vault key in the Vault of the Warrior, her tattoos glow purple

when Lilith is being mind controlled by Jack/the collar/charging Eridium her tattoos are purple

etc etc

also MAJOR COMMANDER LILY SPOILERS BELOW

her tattoos glow purple during the final cutscene i believe. bonus i’m pretty sure the vault map was glowing white when inside hector. it was still purple on the outside tho soooo take that as you will. i had a picture but i removed it because i didn’t wanna spoil anything for anyone. the whispy bits do remind me of angel’s wings

SPOILERS ARE DONE

dunno if any of this is important but i will say

when u fight a badass skag that’s been charged by an element and is implied to be the result of eridium runoff aka slag? mmm that’s the good shit.

Bloodwing?? her base color is purple. but jack is able to change her element based on outside stimuli (and, again, explosive isn’t actually seen as an element, just a joke... a really... fucked up... joke...)

we also know a lot of the bandits were mutated by the vault key (piece?) in sledge’s mine. might help explain burning psychos (the ones that are literally on fire). 

also maybe the eridian ruins are starting to give off ‘radiation’. you know how the original Eridian Ruins in BL1 were like white/blueish and then all the ones we find in BL2 are purple-ish? maybe they started charging up once the first Vault was opened and that allowed more and more bandits to start getting 

borderlands 1

vs

borderlands 2

(sorry for the shitty screencap, i hope it’s clear enough)

oh also maybe krieg’s ability to breathe fire and light himself on fire since he was a hyperion experiment. dunno if they did slag testing on him or not but... all things considered... it’s a probably maybe. wasn’t his assassin’s assassin the woman in the ECHO logs you find around the WEP?

also Terry the thresher? probably mutated like hell from living in those Vault ruins. might explain the size. also threshers being from the moon might just give them the fire/wormhole abilities inherently. since apparently the moon is some top secret eridian base that can see the future. im not even surprised. also you know. terry drops e-tech stuff upon decimation.

anyway i think Pandora is a lot older than Elpis and that’s why Elpis appears super fucking high-tech compared to Pandora’s ruins.

I mean look at the above then look down here

which makes sense, you’d make the planet before you make the moon yeah?

so elpis was probably put in place to watch over Pandora, maybe the Destroyer and the Warrior’s fight or maybe even to predict the future of that fight. maybe the eridians got paranoid and were like ‘fuck this’ and vanished because they were told they couldn’t win.

i do go into that whole theory of ‘zarpedon saw what the twins are about to do in bl3 and jack ain’t shit’ in an older post of mine so i won’t go into it here, but that’s another option as to why the eridians just booked it the hell outta dodge

bonus: in tycho’s ribs, some of the glowy lights are not actually purple, they’re red-ish

which has me thinking about the glowing red Vault Map we see in the Dev trailer. wonder if that’s going to lead up to elpis

oh! and speaking of elpis

yeah i don’t think that’s just an aesthetic thing cause holy shit

we’re all going to die!

yeah i actually have no idea what’s happening to the moon here

but im going to take a wild guess and draw your attention to that one scene with lilith

when she uhhh teleports in using her firehawk powers

we see it again when tyreen teleports in bandits on promethea

and they look

really

darn

familiar

im not saying we’re gonna teleport the moon but hOLY SHIT would that be F*CKING AWESOME

we also know ‘the moon is the key’ as shown on the cover art sooooo

it’s entirely possible?

which brings me to another point i made a while ago when the booth intro got leaked and i was talking about the ‘vault’ ‘not-vault’ area and decided it was on pandora because of the moon, but made a joke that maybe it wasn’t because i guess we could just move the moon.

what if it actually wasn’t lmao

nah im just playing, i’m pretty sure those are Rakk flying around there, but HEY it’d be cool!

also it’s pretty fucked up what’s happening on elpis considering it looks like it’s being bathed in fire... sucks for everyone on concordia but hey, if it means getting rid of pickle, im game.

OH GOD DAMN IT HE WAS ON SANCTUARY WITH TINA FUC-

anyway.

i wanna move the moon

oh also im still not convinced eleseer isn’t found by going thru a wormhole/alternate dimension/pocket rip/whatever

like, you know how to fight the Sentinel you go inside that giant purple crystal that looks like/is probably eridium? and the arena is WAYYY bigger than it ought to be? and it looks like the outside is made out of glowing graph paper and sick guy fieri flames that’s probably supposed to imply some sort of technological feeling?

oh and it does the “lilith just yeeted u to bloodshot stronghold- just kidding’ effect! which... y’know. my only gripe with that is it actually does appear to be somewhere inside eleseer given if u look at the ceiling it does look to be the same sky you see outside eleseer... but where the fck is eleseer... is it in another dimension inside the moon? bc i still refuse to believe the entire moon is being supported by that area... wouldn’t you see the crust?? somewhere? and it being in another dimension would help explain the whole ‘yeah you’re exactly where you were five seconds ago... but also you’re not because you’re in this arena and it’s clipping except it’s not so even though the sky looks the same because you’re in the same exactly spot you were in 5 seconds ago, you’re actually not (but you are)’. because what the fuck my scrub brain can’t comprehend that!

but god i wanna know if the eridians were harnessing the power of eridium and learned how to create pocket dimensions using their technology and fuckin DID IT the mad lads. i mean isn’t that what Vaults are? just little rips in this dimension. it’s the good shit.

also i wanna know why the Destroyer seemed to have pockets of slag/eridium on it’s tentacles when he’s supposed to be the VILLAIN tm of bl1 and also the eridians. might help explain why eridium only starts appearing after you off that physical rendition of him. also [see that one post i made about the crystals being corpses].

wow.

yeah.

i just spent a straight 2 hours doing nothing but typing this post. i should really go to bed. imma go do that

tomorrow i wanna talk about the seraph vendor. cause i can.

[shannaraisles]

Roll For Initiative

A commission piece for @lechatrouge673, who told me to write something that made me happy. So I ran with the DnD idea!

***

"All right, everyone ready? Settled in?"

Erin looked around the table, snorting with laughter at the sight of her brother, Patrick, attempting to steal yet more of Ana's pierogi off her plate, only to earn himself a slap on the hand and a sharp look. Across the table, Brian was finishing off his sandwich hurriedly, and Toby was - of course - going through his dice ritual to decide which ones made the cut for tonight. They were down a couple of players today, and a couple were going to be late, but that wasn't a game killer. What she had in mind for this weekend was adaptable.

"Recap away, noodle," Patrick managed through his last mouthful, wiping his hands as he did so.

"All right, then."

She drew in a slow breath, settling her thoughts, and began.

"Feeble Noobs ... "

Why did I ever let them call themselves that?

"Following a harrowing adventure in search of Andraste's Ashes, you succeeded in passing the Gauntlet of Faith, proving yourselves worthy to take a pinch of the Ashes back to Redcliffe to cure Arl Eamon and restore him to health. In gratitude for what you did, and for saving his son, as well as concern for the future of the country, he agreed to lend his voice in opposition to Teyrn Loghain Mac Tir in the upcoming Landsmeet. However, his plan involves supplanting Queen Anora, and putting Alistair on the throne instead, since your reluctant paladin is the illegitimate son of the former king, Maric."

"Backstory comes to bite me in the arse," Brian muttered with a grin.

"That's what backstory is for," Erin assured him cheerfully. "You returned to Denerim with the arl, setting up base at his estate, and began to explore the city, hoping to make a connection with some of the nobles and win them to your side. You were attacked by the Antivan Crows, lead by a former colleague of your friend Zevran, who wanted to fulfill his contract on the Grey Wardens and take him back with them. Zevran chose to place himself between Darrian and Alistair, and his former colleagues, and after a tough fight, you emerged victorious. You then decided to treat yourselves to a night at The Pearl, Denerim's foremost brothel, which I am never going to forget -"

The laughter at the table was a very clear reminder that allowing her players to have too much fun at her expense was going to turn into a story for all the years to come. Jenny, as Zevran, had insisted on sampling the delights of all the men and women at The Pearl once she'd discovered it was a fade to black situation, just to make Erin describe and play an increasingly odd selection of throwaway NPCs made up on the spot.

"Upon returning to Arl Eamon's estate, you found Erlina, Queen Anora's elven companion, beside herself with worry. Arl Howe, Loghain's right-hand man, had imprisoned the queen in his city estate. Against Eamon's wishes, you decided to rescue her. and with a series of truly stunning stealth rolls, and one very lucky save, you made your way into the Howe estate, where you freed Soris, Darrian's cousin, and discovered a few means by which you can sway some of the nobles to your cause. You were confronted by Howe himself, and managed to take down both him and his elite guard, freeing Queen Anora in the process. However, when you attempted to leave, you were stopped by Ser Cauthrien, Loghain's loyal commander, and a large number of city guards, who demanded that the Grey Wardens surrender and be put under arrest. Rather than risk the queen's presence in your midst being discovered, Darrian and Alistair voluntarily surrendered, allowing the rest of your party to escape back to Eamon's estate with the queen. And that is where we will pick up ..."

"Hey, you missed out me saving Sten's life with my amazing druid healing skills," Patrick objected mischievously.

"You're a dog, shut up," was Erin's response, sticking her tongue out at her brother for a moment before turning to Brian and Toby.

"Alistair and Darrian," she said, "you come to on filthy blankets in a dark, dingy prison. You’re in a cage - one of many that you can see lining the walls - and you can see other prisoners, some of whom have clearly been tortured, some lying very still. Your equipment, your armor, even your clothes have been taken off you as you lay unconscious. There’s a single guard patrolling the floor outside the cages. What do you do?"

"We're naked?" Brian asked in surprise.

"They've left your underpants on you, but everything else is gone," Erin clarified.

"Is there anything in our cell, or in the cells that I can reach through the bars, that I could use to pick the lock?" Toby inquired. He was always first to jump into the action if he possibly could.

"Roll an investigation check."

"While Darrian's grubbing around on the floor, Alistair's going to wrap the blanket around himself like a girl getting out of the shower," Brian interjected over the sound of rolling dice.

"Ha!" Ana grinned at him across the table. "I knew Alistair had a thing for Darrian!"

"No, he's just worried about offending his friend with the indecency of his ... manly nipples," Brian countered, blatantly not believing a word he was saying.

"5, so that's ... 10," Toby piped up.

Erin glanced at her sheet.

"You root around for a while, reaching through the bars to the cells on either side, but you don't come up with anything that could be used as a lock pick," she said. "As you finish your investigation, the guard rounds the corner to walk by your cell."

"I whip my hand back into the cell and turn to Alistair." Toby assumed his chosen accent for Darrian with an ease that made Brian mock glare at him. "What in the Void are you doin'?"

"I look embarrassed and shuffle a bit, tucking my blanket tighter around my manliness," Brian said, taking a moment to find Alistair's voice again before adding, "It's cold in here."

"What, worried y'goin' to poke my eye out with your nips?"

"Well, you do stand very close sometimes." Brian bit down on a laugh that would have destroyed his accent, and went on. "So what do we do?"

"How well armed and armored is the guard?" Toby asked Erin.

"Standard for a prison guard," she mused. "Splint mail, helmet, longsword and dagger."

"Showing any interest in us?"

"Apart from a glance in to make sure you're still there, he doesn't seem interested," she said. "Guard duty's guard duty, and you're all but naked and locked in a cage."

"Okay." Toby slipped back into Darrian as he turned to Brian. "You play sick, and when 'e comes in, I'll jump 'im."

"What with? A handful of ... what is that, poop? Ergh."

"Just do it."

Brian rolled his eyes, grinning, and turned to Erin.

"Alistair is very reluctantly going to fall down in a swoon and start groaning like there's a bear sitting on top of him," he declared cheerfully, already reaching for his dice.

"Darrian will yell for the guard to come and take a look," Toby added.

"All right." Erin considered this briefly. "Alistair, roll me a performance check."

"Performance? Ugh ..."

The dice rattled on the table. Brian took one look at the roll, and thumped his forehead onto the dice tray, holding up a single digit.

"Natural one!"

As the rest of the group burst out laughing, Erin giggled her way through the guard's reaction.

"So, while Alistair's lying on the ground making ridiculous noises, the guard comes to the cell door and looks in, and he just, he's not impressed," she said, lowering her timbre for the guard. "Very nice. D'you do duck impressions too?"

Brian snorted. "Alistair stops groaning and just looks up at the guard, sort of pouting," he said. "You don't think I have a career on the stage then?"

"Mate, you're gonna be dead in the morning, so do what you like," was the guard's response.

"How close is he to the bars?" Toby asked.

"Couple of feet," Erin answered.

"Great. I launch myself at the cell door and try to grab him through the bars."

"This is why we need Darrian," Ana commented to Patrick. "He just does stuff."

"Oh, woof." Patrick nodded sagely in agreement, laughing as she backhanded his shoulder lightly. "What? I'm a dog!"

"You're an idiot," Ana informed him with a smile.

"Roll, um ..." Erin drummed her fingers for a moment. "You know what, just roll a straight dexterity check for me."

"Twenty." Toby shook his head as she opened her mouth. "Not natural."

"Okay, well, while the guard is laughing at Alistair, Darrian rushes the bars and manages to grab him by the collar of his mail," Erin said, ignoring the quiet conversation to her right. "What do you want to do with him?"

"I want to ... yank him hard and try and knock him out against the bars," Toby decided.

"Bear in mind, you're rolling against his AC, and your arm is thrust through a space about six inches wide," she reminded him. "Give me a strength check at disadvantage."

"Oh god, strength is really not my strong suit," Toby muttered, rolling his d20 twice. "Yeah, I'm a weakling. Doesn't happen."

"What did you get?" Patrick asked curiously.

"Rolled a five and a two, so that's three," Toby said with a grin.

"All right, so as you go to yank him toward the bars, the guard pulls backwards, and your grip just isn't enough to hold onto him as he backs up," Erin narrated. "Don't you try that again, y'hear? Bloody Wardens. He scowls at you, but he doesn't come close again, just turns and goes back on his round of the prison floor."

"Can't say you didn't try," Brian said encouragingly. "So what do we do now?"

"I'm out of ideas. S'pose we're waitin' to be rescued now." Toby smirked across the table at the other two. "Over to you, fearless warriors."

"Oh, yeah, this is going to go really well," Ana drawled, glancing at Patrick.

Anyone playing off him tended to have a bit of a rough go of it because of his obtuse character creation. He'd agreed to play the game when his little sister had begged, but his condition had been that he was allowed to create his own unique character. What he had come up with was a druid stuck permanently in dog form, which made for some interesting scenarios.

"All right, so - for the sake of brevity - let's say that you got Anora safely back to Arl Eamon's estate, and it was decided that Sten and ... the dog ... have the best chance of getting the Wardens out safely," Erin said. She knew this group too well to let them have a debate, even when there were only two of them involved in it.

"Sten, Barkspawn ... you approach Fort Drakon. It's a walled, heavily fortified keep, pretty much in the center of the city, named after the Orlesian emperor who founded the Andrastian Chantry. It's the oldest building in Denerim, built out of heavy gray granite, and it kind of squats on the landscape in a series of concentric circles built around a very tall tower in the center. There are two guards on the main gate, but they don't challenge you as you pass through. What do you do?"

Ana straightened her shoulders, channeling her inner Qunari as she dropped her timbre into her character's voice.

"They call this a fort? I thought it would be bigger."

"Woof."

A shared snort of laughter went up from the other side of the table as Ana glared at Patrick. Evidently he wasn't going to make this easy on her, role-play wise. He gave her an innocent smile in answer.

"Stands to reason that the cells would be in the tower," Anna mused, apparently deciding to ignore Patrick's insight for the time being. "So I guess we go to the tower?"

Erin nodded.

"Okay then," she said, checking her notes swiftly. "The tower is easily the tallest building in the city. It's also very wide. I mean, you could fit a couple of dragons in this thing with room to spare. There are more guards in evidence in the courtyard around it, but nobody challenges you as you make your way to the door of the tower itself. However, as you approach this enormous, thick-oak door, the two guards in front of it step forward and bar your way. They are better armored and armed than the guards on the main gate of the outer wall, but they seem kind of weary, kind of bored. Door duty isn't exactly rife with excitement. One of them holds up his hand, and says to you, Sten, What is your business in Fort Drakon?"

"Barkspawn stands up a little straighter, and just looks the guy right in the eye," Patrick piped up. "Staring him down like only a mabari can."

"Sten's doing pretty much the same," Ana agreed. "He looms over the guard. I'm a giant with a war dog. Either I am making a delivery, or I am beseiging your fort. Hope for the former."

Erin chuckled. She loved the way Sten had developed over the last months.

"Okay, make a persuasion check for me."

"Why not deception?" Brian asked out of curiosity.

"Didn't actually tell a lie," she explained, as the dice rolled.

"Oh geez, my persuasion is crap," Ana was muttering, looking up to add, "Nine."

"The guard looks you up and down, and then over to the dog staring at him, and exchanges a look with his fellow guard. They don't seem to be buying this. I wasn't told we were getting a mabari."

"Must I point out the obvious?" Ana tried again, putting a growl into her voice that made Patrick blink in surprise. "I am a large, impatient man with a war dog. Either let us in, or get someone who will."

"Barkspawn growls in agreement with him," Patrick offered hopefully. "Teeth bared, muscles tensed. Looking like he really wants to rip someone's throat out."

"Uh, all right." Laughing, Erin shook her head. "Roll for intimidation, with advantage, since Barkspawn's helping you."

Again, the dice rolled, and Patrick let out a whoop of triumph as Ana grinned.

"I rolled a four, and a natural twenty, so twenty-six," she declared cheerfully, setting Brian and Toby to praising the roll enthusiastically.

"Well, you are a large, impatient man, fully armed, with a war dog, and these guys just don't get paid enough to deal with things like this," Erin told them. "I can't believe that worked ... They look to each other, and back to you, and step away hurriedly. Uh, all right. You, uh ... go inside, and wait in the room on the right there. We'll, um ... The captain'll come and see you. One of them pushes the door open and hurries inside, and the other gestures for you to follow him, while keeping as far away from the two of you as he possibly can while at the same time trying not to look scared. The one who went ahead of you gestures toward an antechamber to the right side, and hurries off to find the captain, leaving you both alone. What do you do?"

There was a moment of pause.

"Sten really doesn't like being kept waiting," Ana mused, eyeing Patrick thoughtfully. "This is pointless. We should go in fighting."

"Barkspawn barks back in agreement," Patrick answered. "I mean, we're inside now. It can't be that difficult to find the cells, right?"

"Oh my god, are you really going to do that?" Toby asked, incredulous disbelief written all over his smiling face. "You're just going to fight your way through a whole fort?"

"Sure, why not?" Ana shrugged, and looked over at Erin. "I draw my sword, and wait by the door for the captain to come in. When he does, I'm gonna swing at him."

"While Sten goes for his body, I'll pounce his legs and try to knock him prone," Patrick said, picking up his dice.

"All right then."

Erin couldn't quite believe that the admittedly bad plan to talk their way in had suddenly become the worse plan of fighting their way in, but that was D&D. Groping for her character stats sheets, she fumbled for the captain.

"You're left waiting for no more than a few minutes, enough time to get into position by the door, and the captain's footsteps make it very obvious when he's coming. You go as soon as he steps in through the doorway?"

"Yep, the second I see him." Ana rolled her dice, checking her own sheet as Patrick did the same. "Twenty-eight to hit?"

"That hits, roll damage. Patrick?"

"Twenty-five."

"Nice rolls - that hits as well." Erin glanced down at her sheet, rolling her own dice quickly to see if her NPC might be able to avoid either of these. "Actually, Barkspawn, roll a dexterity check for me quick to see if you can get him off his feet."

"Sixteen damage," Ana said, leaning forward hopefully.

"So, as the captain of the guard steps in through the doorway, Sten swings his massive greataxe, and it sinks into the captain's shoulder, crunching through plate armor and pressing chain-mail and cloth into quite a significant wound. Blood spurts out as he yells in pain, the sound echoing down the hallway he came from. Patrick, what did you get?"

"I rolled a seventeen on the dex, and a ... three damage." Patrick threw Brian a dirty look across the table as the other man laughed. "What? I only have teeth and claws!"

"Well, he rolled a four on his saving throw," Erin assured him, "so as Sten rips the axe out of this gaping, bleeding wound in the captain's shoulder, Barkspawn charges toward him, gripping one of his ankles in his vicious teeth and pulling hard. The captain staggers, and falls down hard. He is now prone."

"Do I get an attack of opportunity?" Ana asked hopefully. "Since, you know, he's gone from standing in front of me to lying on the floor."

"Technically ... no," Erin began to say, but she knew better than to force a technical point. What was the point of the game if it wasn’t fun? "But in this instance, why not? Roll another attack, with advantage because he's prone."

"Excellent."

"You're so blood-thirsty," Patrick commented over the sound of the dice rolls. "I love it."

"I'm a large, impatient man with a greataxe," Ana answered cheerfully. "Twenty-six again, and fourteen damage."

"As the guard captain falls, Sten takes another swing with his greataxe, and this time the blade sinks into the man's leg, blood flowing freely from this new wound as he screams in pain again. He's hurting, but he's not dead, and you can hear the sounds of other guards rushing toward the sound of his screams."

"I cast Polymorph on him while he's down," Patrick announced, one finger in the air as he scanned his spell sheet.

"What's the save on that?" Erin picked up her dice to roll.

"Uh, that is ... wait for it, wait for it ..." He peered at his sheet, scanning desperately for the appropriate number. "I really need to organize this - oh! Wisdom, fifteen!"

Erin rolled for the saving throw, and snorted with laughter.

"Natural three," she laughed, shaking her head again. "What are you turning him into?"

"A flea," her brother said firmly.

"Seriously?" Ana looked at him in astonishment. "You know he's just gonna bite you to all hell."

"Yeah, but I'm a dog," he pointed out. "What's another flea?"

To the sound of the laughter rising around the table, Erin tried to get control of the narrative again.

"All right. As the sound of the approaching guards gets louder, Barkspawn channels his druidic magic, and suddenly the guard captain is no longer visible. A moment later, you feel a sharp bite on the inside of your ear."

"I scratch that ear." Patrick grinned.

"Fair enough, okay. But as you look up, you see four more guards heading toward you, swords drawn, ready to fight."

Erin looked at Ana and Patrick with a slightly evil grin.

"Roll for initiative."

[wheelthefridge]

in honor of last night having been my last ever shift dishwashing at the same restaurant i’ve been at for the past four years here’s an absurdly long list of random chaotic moments that literally no one asked for that i’ve been compiling since day one:

bj, with a half full gallon of orange juice: this expired two months ago. *pours down drain* that was a long time ago

sam: YOU! I HAVE A BONE TO PICK WITH YOU!! *carries on normally with no explanation* bj: smack that! that too! smack those vegetables! punch that burger in the nose! chop that bun! bob: no, flick the bun. you have to flick it. 

*bad and boujee playing* bj: walks into kitchen, singing bj: you better know when to hold em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run bj: walks out of kitchen, still singing

me: hey can you put the wet floor sign out for me dylan: sure dylan: *slips while putting the sign out* me:

sam: get this- i haven’t smoked pot in like three days and my brain is ready to roll! yeah!

joe: ha! oldest trick in the book i just started writing 

dude @bar: ten percent of people are over 6'1" other dude: what about 6'2"  dude 1: what? no. ten percent of people are OVER 6'1" - so that includes 6'2" dude 2: idk I know a lot of tall guys. taller than me dude 1: what? i’m saying- just- ten percent of everyone in the whole world- you know how many people there are in the world? 7 billion– dude 2: i thought it was six billion  dude 1: no, 7 billion- ten percent of 7 billion—

joe, digging through the trash: i’m just gonna peruse through here,, aaaaannnd….. nope not here me: what’re u looking for Joe: …..a book

didi: is eating a pistachio  katherine: is that sour cream

sam: some dirty whorebag wants two pickles 

joe: sam she am. that’s right. dr seuss wrote a book about her 

katherine: oh my goddd this song is always on i’m so tired of it joe: is it? i don’t think i’ve heard it before carolyn: eh it’s all just one long brazilian song to me

katherine: look at my straw i put it in the pencil sharpener 

sam: i’m on crack cocaine. you heard it here

sam, aggressively putting silverware in the tray: just the way the cookie crumbles me: yeah? sam, fake crying: yes

adele: if you’re ready- sam: what if I’m not bob: too bad. she only cares if she’s ready

something: *breaks* sam: time for the mop. and by mop i mean… this thing *holds up dustpan*

mike: you should go on junior master chef…. and only make fries 

sam, quietly as she speedwalks by me: panic panic panic panic panic panic panic panic

sam, beginning of the night: my goal is to make at least forty bucks tonight. hopefully sixty sam, later that night: i’ve made five dollars

sam, pouring a drink into the trash right next to the sink: you know, im not sure why i poured that in the trash. i’ve had a very off day

katherine, after accidentally spraying salsa on herself: i just sprayed salsa all over myself bj: i feel like that too sometimes. i love salsa so much

sam: can you imagine if i did like hardcore drugs how messed up i would be- i’m messed up soberly

someone: what’re you supposed to feed twenty kids  kerry: pizza bj: vodka 

sam: will you let bob know there’s gonna be seven in the snug bj: seven in the snug? that’s my band name. we’re really good

edson: *spins cover on counter and stares at it for solid thirty seconds before putting his finger down to stop it* edson: good. 

sam: what should i draw bj: you should draw casey, hanging from a cliff, with a pterodactyl flying towards them who is on fire, but, seems optimistic about it 

bj: life is too short for low fat cheese. remember that. 

sam, beginning of night, in a really good mood: guess what i’m drunk and high right now  sam, later that night: i was just pouring a beer and i dropped it. like my hand just let go of it sam, end of night: i’m never doing this again 

joe: you know who didn’t clock out yet?? i have two thumbs! joe: ……wait joe: you know who has two thumbs and hasn’t clocked out yet?? this guy!! me: there ya go buddy

bob: i’ve slept fifteen hours in the past four days me: that’s not good bob: yeah

edson: look edson: *holds out hand with top spinning in his palm* *giggles*

sam: i cannot wait for this day to be over  me: it’s barely started  sam: i took a shot before i got here. i have more in my car

bob: hi sam sam: hi bob  didi: hi sam sam: fuck off

joe: her? oh yeah her name is sarah whitaker  katherine: oh i think i know her joe: that’s funny because i just made that up. i’m willing to bet money that she’s nineteen tho me: why joe: bc i overheard her say that she’s nineteen

joe: i’m gonna send you a video but you can’t watch it now it’s needs full attention with headphones and the lights off 

bj: if you lose your hand, don’t replace it with a fork. that would be a bad choice. i know it’s probably the cheapest option, right up there with stick, but just spend the money. 

bj, on a different day: i think if you were to get your hands cut off, getting them replaced with plates would be a very bad idea. you can dig. and you can toss. but that’s about it. no playing the saxophone.  

colby: *doesn’t show up to work* bj: maybe i should leave him a message of just me crying 

katherine: i think an old man just asked me to live with him

sam: wait *pulls celery strings out of her mouth* that just came out of my throat

bob: i’m such a grump tonight. i’m in a good mood i’m just so grumpy.  bob: maybe i’m not in a good mood…

bj, after sending christa downstairs to get liquor for the bar: i put a live cobra down there too so… if she comes back with it dead in her hands…. she’s a champ. and that’s that. 

bj: i had a dog today did you have a dog? me: no bj: oh. well. 

dylan, holding phone camera at joe: hey joe can you pull ur shirt down joe, pulling the collar of his shirt halfway down his chest: yeah like this? dylan, taking picture: yeah thanks 

bj: HI-YAH carley: you’re a ninja!! bj: yes. don’t be alarmed. i only use my powers for good. 

bj, with one bottle in each hand, pouring water in the sink, mimicking cow milking motions: it’s like a cow. mooooooeeeeeeuuuuuhhhhhhgggg aaaaaauuuuuueuejhshhsii. that’s what cows sound like right?

bj: we have a dog, and we’re getting chickens. i’m not really sure why were getting chickens. do i consider myself a farmer? not really. 

bj: we should make a youtube channel of just me saying really random things to you and you not responding to me whatsoever me: mhmm

nancy: I’m sleeping

sam: *pours drink out on counter next to sink* sam: wHAT the FuCK was that!? why did i do that?? i’ve lost it! i’ve hit rock bottom!!

sam: *bends over* ughhhhhhhhhhhhh *straightens up* ok i’m fine

bj: yum! that’s how i rate the soup. two yums up!! *laughs for like a full minute*

sam: i got my motorcycle license over the weekend and now all everyone’s saying to me is “no don’t get a motorcycle they’re so dangerous” like shut the fuck up if i die i die it’s my choice 

bj: i think if i were to be turned into some kind of commercial type of food, if i got turned into a nugget, i think i’d be indignant. i’ve lived my whole life and now i’m a nugget??? “oh i was a great roasted-“ i was a nugget. i was eaten with fries out of a box with a small soda. 

bj: hello everybody. i have arrived. please remain calm.  bob: *screams*

radio: the fastest lawn mower in the world goes up to 150 miles per hour! bob: …….why??

sam: i just meowed in scotty’s face and he was completely unfazed by it. like a full on Meow. 

bob: lemme just touch these live wires with my wet hands  bj: bob has gone offline

katherine: i totally forgot to put their order in for i don’t even know how long me: ……..i’m sure it’ll be fine katherine: i mean, nothing matters, right? right. nothing matters. 

bj: hey did you guys hear that kate: yeah what was that bj: oh i was just yelling……….. about the soup kate: me: katherine: bj: i’ll try to keep it down next time

bob: you sleep a lot when you’re old. it’s just practice for death. getting ready for The Big Sleep. let’s see how do i wanna go out? on my back?? nah not for me. on my front babey! 

didi: hi sam sam: SHUT UP didi, quieter: okay…… sam: i love you  didi: no bj: so you’re a grownup now. that’s means you have to do grown up things, like, pay for dinner and stuff? me: uh huh bj: it’s all downhill from here 

bj: pon pon the van poco. right? me: mhmm bj: probably. i mean. i’m no doctor, but

random woman @ bar: we are the matrix. We. Are. The Matrix. 

bj, to the tune of frosty the snowman: clunkity clunk clunk clunkity clunk clunk look at all this stuff. clunkity clunk clunk clunkity clunk clunk making casey’s job tough! pretty good right?? i just made it up 

bj: *walks into kitchen* YES! that’s all i have to say. that’s it. BOBS killing it. DIDIS killing it. casey MURDERED it. you’re welcome. *walks out of kitchen* bj: today is the second day in a row my dog has eaten my lunch. yesterday and then today. it’s my own fault really bob: well you know what they say about men who like floppy french fries. *doesn’t elaborate*

sam: there’s a toy baby in my section. like just a toy baby taking up a seat in my section. what do i do like do i move the bitch? do i leave her there??

bob, talking to himself: if you get sick tomorrow, just remember. it’s your own fault for eating food off the floor. 

bob, to katherine: no, you don’t have to mop the carpet

bj: cheeeesy. 

laura: if i get through tonight without a heart attack it’ll be incredible. if i do have a heart attack tho just let me go

caldo: *unintelligible yelling* SELLING my BODY for SEX *more unintelligible yelling*

bob: my fathers brother sent all his kids to australia. i guess he figured at least one of them would make it

caldo: i don’t trust people who go out to eat tuna fish

bob: can you make some more guacamole soon we’re running low laura: pulls five (5) avocados from her pockets 

bob: he looks like jesus. well. he looks like what white people think jesus looked like

sam: yeah. Please. eat some more mother Fucking crackers. 

bj: i feel like i gave birth to the eggplant stacks tonight. and honestly? if my child looked like that? i’d be proud. proud to have an eggplant child

bj: alright everybody let’s get the fuf out of here!! i said fuf not f- it’s safe. f u f starts and ends with soft letters no one gets hurt. any word that starts with a soft letter and ends with a hard letter is bad news… i feel like every time i come in here i annoy you guys. casey’s one dumbass comment away from killing me. “hey so what are your thoughts on grass?” “that’s it” *mimics shooting a gun*

ilia: -and the dogs gonna get diabetes- katherine, indignantly: i cleaned it really well!

mickey: i’ll tell you one thing. crack is good. 

sam: some lady just rolled up to the bar, no bra, nipples beamin through the shirt- LETS GET IT!!!!

caldo: *speed walks into kitchen and shotguns a beer over the trash* ok i’m back. i should not have smoked this morning

dom: little kid just picked up a knife and went “oh cool i can stab someone” me, katherine, and sam in unison: good dom: yeah the dad took it away 

sam: my friend was like “why is your go to dance move just to snap” and i was like “i don’t know, i’m white” *shrugs*

bj: someone just asked me if i’m having fun. am i having fun? i don’t know if i’m having fun. there are certainly other things i’d rather be doing right now, but i don’t know if i can definitively say that i’m Not having fun. 

bj: some jobs require Only a ladle bj, thirty seconds later, after walking away and coming back: sometimes, also a funnel

bj, @ laura who’s eating cornbread: you cornbread eating chef!!!  laura: bj: laura: bj: i’m just saying facts in a weird way. you know like you’re in trouble. 

sam: *war cry* *spits out gum* *walks away*

bj: what kind of smoothie? Soup Smoothie!!

katherine: so this woman ordered some hot water so i gave it to her and her husband says you know what that’s for right and i’m like ….to drink? and he says nope! and doesn’t explain so i’m just like ………..okay! and walk away bc i don’t even want to know 

bj: there’s no shame in it! A Grown Man Can Bathe In Yogurt!!!

bj, leaning down very close to to-go box: i love you

bob: anyone want a drink? brian: whatever’s your strongest bob: milk it is

guy at bar: sUE HIM?!?!??? oh i’d sue him yeah

sam: who orders something extra cold?? like, you need to Die now thanks. 

sam: do you dare me to drink this buffalo sauce me: yes laura, walking by: snort it

sam: one more day. just one more day laura: of what sam: waking up

bob: *is trying to explain easter to jewish laura* laura: wait so he died… then he came back to life?? then he died Again??? bob: he died. then he came back just to tell people he was alive. then he said SEE YA and ascended to heaven

sam: i HATE margaritas. i don’t know why i just made myself one. 

bob: wow. i have this overpowering urge to just go home. 

bj, putting back a slotted spoon: this is a bad choice for dressing. a bad choice. 

me: *catches a plate about to fall* bj: woah! smooth moves!! spider-man? maybe. 

danny: so you know how at my other job everyone calls me daddy?

sam: *dumps out two full wine glasses* i fucked up. tell no one. 

me: remember when we used to be able to leave early? bob: no. i think we imagined it. 

danny: i didn’t realize we served DICK here -a few min later- danny: sorry i just got out of work and i’m all fired up

sam: my moms drunk and she won’t go home

bob: hey wasn’t that slang for mari- bj: cocaine. 

bj: *kicks kitchen door open* YEE-HAW!!!!

danny: sorry casey  me: what for  danny: for having to deal with me me: yeah *shrugs* danny: they should pay you more me: yeah

didi: i kill you ilia: do it now didi: no ilia: do it i wanna die

danny, about a burger: we’ve got ourselves a squirter!!

sam: is that a chicken patty  sydney: it’s my dog

sam, on my last night with her: lets get casey TRASHED tonight

sam: are you gonna go dancing in new york didi: yes laura: whore it up

[picturetoburnnn]

Lovey Dovey | Calum Hood x Reader

Pairing - c.h. x reader

Word Count - 1.6k

Warning - fair bit of cussing and enough fluff to make you sick

A/N -  F L U F F and S W E E T N E S S

TAGS - (dm me to be added) @cxddlyash @emomack @merryblueberry02

(we love drunk calum)

Calum leaned in to give you a short kiss before running off to the stage, as per your usual pre-show routine. He cradled your cheek with one hand, his lips were mere centimeters away from your own.

“Good luck,” you muttered, and he could feel your warm breath on his skin.

“You’re all the luck I need,” he whispered.

As he leaned in to connect your lips, Michael spoke from across the room.

“He leans in closer, brushing a stray lock of hair from her face, staring into her ey--”

“Michael, I have had it up to here with your bullshit!” He held his hand far above his head.

Ashton and Luke giggled in the corner as Michael snorted. “Whatever loverboy. C’mon, we’ve got a show to play. You can be all mushy gushy later.”

By that point, you were a blushing mess, and pretty sure your face was red enough to resemble a tomato. Calum seemed to not be bothered by the blonde boy’s teasing, however. He simply rolled his eyes, glancing back to you. “I love you,” he mouthed.

“I love you too, you cutesty bastard,” you smiled and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. He smiled lightly at the action.

“One more?”

You were about to turn him down when Ashton pulled him back by the collar of his shirt. “Play music now, do couple stuff later, Calum.” Ash huffed, feigning annoyance. The drummer shot you a wink as you giggled, your boyfriend whining incoherently.

“Go,” you told them. All four of them waved at you before stepping out on the stage, greeting their screaming fans.

Throughout the majority of the concert, Calum would shoot a look to you through the doorway, winking, smiling, or sticking his tongue out. After they played Want You Back, Ashton groaned into the microphone.

“Calum, can you not ogle your girlfriend for just thirty more minutes?”

A blush erupted over the boy’s face, leading to screams from the excited crowd.

“Sorry mate, Y/N is over there and I can't take my eyes off her.”

Your face reddened violently as the screams of the excited crowd sounded again.

“No, no, no, I don’t think you guys realize exactly how much of a lovey dovey couple they are. We literally had to drag him away from her to come out tonight.” Michael’s announcement had Calum running to his mic.

“That is not true.”

“Mate yes it is, I grabbed you by the collar to get you out of the dressing room,” Ashton accused.

“Calum’s in loooove,” Luke sang into his microphone.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have I told you guys lately how much you fucking suck?” Calum raised a teasing middle finger in the boys’ general direction.

Luke let out a fake gasp. “Calum, how dare you? I thought you loved us.”

“Nah man, he only loves Y/N,” Ashton snickered.

Michael ran over to Luke and whispered something in his ear, then to Ashton and did the same. The three of them shared a devilish grin, and Michael spoke into his mic. “Can we have the woman in question come out here? I gotta know what she thinks of all this.”

Your eyes went wide, and you shook your head.

“She’s a little shy, so you might need to lure her out. Y/N, come on, your man’s out here without you!” Within seconds, the crowd was chanting “Y/N, Y/N, Y/N!” A crew member handed you a mic and all but shoved you out on the stage. The audience erupted into cheers of excitement, and you shrunk into yourself, holding to the microphone in your hand like a lifeline.

Calum set down his guitar and ran over to you, wrapping you in his embrace. “It’s okay, baby girl. Just relax, it’s not too awful,” he spoke in your ear to be heard over the crowd. You nodded slightly, and he let you go. You took a deep breath and brought the mic up to your face.

“You’re sweaty and gross,” you joked.

“Even your girlfriend thinks you’re gross,” Ashton quipped.

“Yeah, nasty,” I teased, pushing my nerves back.

“Babe,” Calum whined, “what happened to you being on my team?”

You shrugged, and the audience cheered on your teasing.

“You know, it was very rude of you to make me fall in love with you,” Calum accused.

“Not what you had in mind?” You goaded.

“Not at all.” He shook his head.

“I’m not sorry.” The shouts of the fans grew even louder.

“Me neither.” By this point the shrieking and cheering was almost deafening.

“Hey Cal, not to be an ass, but hurry up, we’ve got six more songs to play,” Luke laughed.

Calum waved him off, but nonetheless grabbed both of your hands.

“Y/N, I have loved you for the past four years, and in all that time, you’ve loved me back. Through tours, trips, and long distances, you stuck with my lame ass, and I don’t know how or why, but I’m endlessly grateful. My life would suck without you, and I don’t know what I would do without you. You’re my best friend, my lover against all odds, and you make me happy when no one else can. I love you, the boys love you, and most importantly, my dog loves you.”

This, of course, led to an eruption of laughter throughout the entirety of the building. But that was nothing compared to the outburst of cheers when Calum got down on one knee.

“I was gonna wait until after the concert was over, but I can’t wait anymore. It’s you, it’s always been you, and it will only ever be you. The way I feel when I’m with you is something I can’t even begin to describe. I’m better when I’m with you, you bring out the best of me. I want you, only you, for the rest of my life. I’ll love you forever. Please, baby, please, will you marry me?”

He reached into his back pocket, pulling out a blue navy box that you’d only ever seen in movies. You clasped your hands over your mouth, frozen in place. Flipping it open and holding it out to you, Calum looked up at you with the eyes that you could get lost in all day long.

“What do you say, sweetheart? Y/N Hood doesn’t sound too bad, does it?”

Not trusting your voice, you nodded your head furiously, tears slipping out of your eyes.

A priceless grin broke out across his face as he stood, lifting you up and spinning you around. In that moment, everything else faded away - there was no crowd, no concert, no instruments or stage. It was just you and Calum, and your pressed your lips against his in a passionate kiss. He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours as he pushed the ring onto your ring finger.

“I love you,” you breathed.

“I love you more than you know.”

The pair of you were snapped out of your moment by Ashton’s voice. “I call best man!”

Michael groaned, “Augh, I wanted that!”

Ashton snickered. “But I called it. Plus, he called me his soulmate on my birthday. I automatically get first dibs.”

You raised your eyebrows at Calum, who was staring at the boys incredulously. “You sure it’s me you want to marry, and not Ash?” You jested.

The crowd broke out into screams of amusement, and you swore you could hear a couple people screaming ‘Cashton!’

“Alright, congratulations to the happy couple!” Luke yelled. “However, as much as I love you, Y/N, I gotta send you back so your fiance can do his part in this concert.”

You smiled, nodding. You pressed one more kiss to Calum’s lips before stepping back through the stairs into the backstage area. A couple crew members gave you smiles and thumbs up as you passed by them. You smiled back, silently thanking them.

You listened as the boys played their hearts out on the stage, and you could’ve sworn Calum’s vocals were stronger than ever in Valentine. Slowly came the end of the show, and the boys took their bows before running back down to the room you were in. Calum came straight for you, lifting you up once again and spinning you around. You squealed in delight.

“You’re still all sweaty and gross.”

“Usually, you don’t mind me being hot, sweaty, and all over you,” he purred in your ear, causing a fierce blush to take over your features.

“Go shower,” you told Calum. “I’ll be right here when you’re done.”

He nodded. “There’s room for two?”

“Oi, none of that around us,” Ashton called.

Calum groaned, but obediently left you to seek the shower in the locker room. Ashton shot you a wink before following suit, Michael and Luke not far behind.

You plopped down on the couch, admiring the rock on your finger. Grabbing your phone, you snapped a picture of it and sent it to your best friend, who immediately replied -

<- Babe, are you for real?

-> Yeah, he dropped on one knee during his concert. im sure theres already a vid of it somewhere online

<- HOLY SHIT Y/N THATS HUGE!!!!!!!

-> I KNOW!!!!

You continue conversing with your best friend until a pair of hands covered your eyes from behind you.

“Guess who?”

“Hmm, it’s either Calum, or the cold, clammy hands of death.”

The hands moved away, and Calum’s upside down face filled your vision. “It’s Calum!”

“Dammit,” you muttered jokingly.

“You know you love me.”

“Unfortunately, I do,” you smiled and slotted your mouth against his own.

“Baby girl, the things you do to me,” he smiled against you.

“You love it.”

“Marry me,” he whispered.

“I already said yes.”