#HES BREAKFAST LUNCH AND REINFORCEMENTS!!!

[ms-demeanor]

You posted about adhd and I was hoping to follow up to clarify something. I’ve explained to my partner a million times about how the borderline-hoarding mess of his space is very mentally draining to me, and he understands but we’ve both essentially accepted he won’t clean his mess because he can’t because of his adhd. You’re saying he’s actually being a shit head?

This isn't necessarily an issue of him being a shithead, but it also isn't a sustainable situation. It's not good for you and there's a level of clutter that's probably not good for him either.

Large bastard is a lot more clutter-y than I am. The solution we've come to is trying to keep our messes at least isolated from one another; he can have his messes and I can have mine, but he can have those messes in his spaces, not all over the place. Sometimes those messes migrate, and that's when it's important for him to make the effort to rein them in rather than trying and failing to make a daily effort to keep our entire shared space tidy.

I think when you say "we've both essentially accepted he won't clean his mess" what I'm hearing is resignation; you're not happy about this but you don't know what to do so you've thrown up your hands and he feels helpless and unsure of what to do to improve the situation. This is the kind of "it's fine" that isn't really fine.

I think it would be worthwhile for you to each separately think about the mess and talk about it together. Are there areas that YOU *need* to have not-messy? Both for utility and your mental health? Are there areas where you can tolerate more mess than otherwise? Are there areas that are going to be harder for him to keep the mess out of than others? Are there things he doesn't *know* about cleaning up the mess?

I'm obviously a big "communication communication communication" person so I'm going to recommend a lot of talking about stuff, which is probably going to mean a lot of thinking about and interrogating stuff. I'm going to say "talk to him about why the mess bothers you" which means you also have to really articulate to yourself why the mess bothers you (for instance I'm not actually *bothered* by a messy kitchen, but I know it's going to reflect badly on us - and me specifically b/c of presumed gender roles - if someone pops by and the kitchen is a disaster, AND a messy kitchen is going to be harder to use). Genuinely, sometimes knowing *why* something is a problem might make it easier for someone with ADHD to do something. And it's not that he doesn't care that it upsets you, it's just that "Oh if I don't wash my breakfast dishes Anon won't have clear counterspace to make lunch" might be stickier in his brain (and less hard to look at emotionally) than "this thing I forget to do upsets my partner so I should do it."

For the record, I think that people with ADHD should read up on Demand Avoidance and see if it might explain some of the issues that they have in their day-to-day life; I've seen some really unfortunate situations with friends where trying to do things that their partner needed became the subject of demand avoidance. *I* have experienced negative outcomes of demand avoidance. The solution to that, however, isn't to stop making attempts to do the thing OR to simply try harder to do as they're asked/told (which reinforces the demand), it's to work on setting up a situation where the partners' needs are not interpreted as a demand. This is fuck-off difficult and requires a lot of patience and care and many attempts to succeed and will be different for each person and relationship.

(Also for the record demand avoidance isn't *super* strongly linked to ADHD and it's not a definitive symptom; like Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, it is something that occurs in some number of people with ADHD and can be a useful lens through which to examine various behaviors; you don't need to have DA or RSD to have ADHD, and having DA or RSD also doesn't invalidate your diagnosis; they're symptoms. For me, DA often feels like "if I don't look at it, it can't get me" - If I ignore all the messages I've got they aren't real and don't have real consequences so I'll just ignore my texts. If I don't look at the vendor email about the order, the problem with the order isn't real and it won't get added to my task list. If I don't look at the requests in my inbox I can't let people down when I don't do them. It's a self-protective coping mechanism but it's *maladaptive* and I can't just ignore the vendor email or all my texts. I need to work on a way of doing the stuff that I'm avoiding in a way that makes it less stressful and doesn't hurt the people relying on me. That takes a lot of effort, personal insight, trial and error, and )

But before I dive into specifics I want to be really really clear about one thing: sometimes people are simply incompatible. Sometimes one person has such a low tolerance for "mess" and the other person has such a high threshold for "mess" that it can't be reconciled. It sucks that this can end up being a thing that people break up over, but it is MUCH better to acknowledge incompatibility as early as possible instead of spending years and years building resentment.

There used to be a great forum called MiL's Anonymous that I spent a lot of time on. It had a lot of people in a lot of difficult situations struggling to get by and hold their relationships together. The question that was used as a litmus test to approach each situation was simple: If you knew today that everything about living with this person would be the same in five years, would you stay?

Because you can't control your partner. You can't control the future. You can only control yourself and your proximity to situations that are harmful to you. If you knew, 100%, that things wouldn't get better in five years, would you be okay with staying in this relationship? If the answer is "no," then that's that. Don't worry about questions of whether or not your boyfriend is a shithead, start the process of ending the relationship because there's a good chance the situation is going to be exactly the same in five years.

If the answer is "yes," and you'd stay in the relationship regardless of whether or not things changed, then it's time to take actions to improve your life within the context of the relationship.

(No judgement on that yes or no, btw. If you would hate living like this for another five years, and you would feel like you'd wasted your time and hadn't done the things you wanted to with your life, get out. Bail. Go. It will be better for you and better for your partner if you split instead of spending half a decade building resentments and and problems that you'll have to spend another half a decade healing from.)

Also, a note: you describe your boyfriend's mess as borderline hoarding - is the issue *mess* or is the issue *clutter*? I have friends who are very tidy, but whose homes are very cluttered. They like things, they have many things, they keep many things around, but their houses are always clean and well-dusted and orderly, just with a tremendous amount of *stuff.* I am addressing all of this as though the issue is mess, not clutter. If your boyfriend's situation is clutter (the space is busy and packed with things but it is functional and clean) and your issue isn't with *mess* (things out of place, things not having a place, things that need to be cleaned up gathering in stacks, falling behind on regular chores like laundry and dishes and taking out the trash) then you definitely need to assess whether or not you are compatible.

For instance here's a room that is messy but not cluttered compared to a room that is cluttered but not messy:

That first room is a *mess* but it would be very easy to clean up in under an hour. The second room is fairly tidy, but would take significant effort to pare down and declutter. BOTH of these can be difficult to live with but the second one is not dangerous or threatening to anyone's health. (The second one is QUITE cluttered and if every room in a house looks like this it can be overwhelming to live with; this is actually harder to deal with in a relationship than the first one in a lot of ways. I don't have a lot of advice for what to do if your partner is a high degree of tidy-but-cluttered because I don't actually think it's a problem or wrong to have thousands of books or bins full of lego or a million kitchen appliances as long as you have the space and can keep it safe and well-maintained; this is a really significant compatibility issue)

Okay, all that out of the way, here's the hard work.

Talk about this shit

Talk to your partner and define "mess." Make sure you are on the same page about what you mean when you're talking about what a messy room looks like versus what a tidy room looks like. Gather reference pictures. DRAW reference pictures.

Explain not just that the mess upsets you, but *why* and *how* it upsets you. In this context don't think of it as your boyfriend's mess, think of it as an unpleasant roommate. Discuss this using "I-statements". "When I have to pick up laundry all over the apartment, I feel like a parent more than a partner." "When there are piles of miniatures all over the table, I feel like I don't have anywhere to do things I'm interested in." "When there are dishes in the sink, I feel frustrated because I have to clean before I can feed myself."

Discuss, frankly and openly, whether he knows how to clean. I'm not trying to make excuses for him here but a lot of people with ADHD have a lot of stress and avoidance around cleaning because they spent a lot of time getting yelled at for not knowing how to clean properly.

Discuss your needs, be firm about what you require but willing to compromise. You *need* some spaces to be clean, and some spaces may be harder for him to keep clean than others. It may be MUCH harder for him to keep a bedroom tidy than it is to keep a kitchen tidy; if you need a clean and empty bedroom with everything put away and he simply cannot do that, that is a compatibility issue. But perhaps you need *your* side of the bedroom to be very orderly and can tolerate a moderate level of mess and clutter on his side. Maybe you're really really bothered by a messy kitchen, but it doesn't bug you if the dining table is covered with projects and papers. Figure out something more workable than "his mess goes everywhere and i live with it because he's incapable of cleaning" because he probably is not incapable of cleaning and you deserve to have places in your home that are comfortable for you.

Reduce friction for cleaning

Sometimes the problem isn't cleaning, the problem is the many many steps before cleaning, or not knowing where something should go when you are done cleaning. One of the absolute best things I've done for myself for cleaning my space is getting a broom holder and mounting the broom to the wall. Sweeping is now essentially thoughtless. I don't have to find the broom or pull it out from a pile of fans or go scrounging around for a dustpan it's right there on the wall, frictionless. So here are some ways to reduce the barriers to cleaning:

Make sure you and your partner both know how to use your cleaning supplies and know where those supplies are. When I switched dishwasher soap I had to re-show Large Bastard where I was storing it and how it was used, because to him what happened was the dishwasher tabs just vanished one day and he didn't know what I was putting in the machine or the process I used. He sometimes puts tools away in places that I can't see (he's more than a foot taller than me) so sometimes I can't get started on a maintenance project until he shows me where he put the battery pack for the drill.

Consider making a how-to chart to or having him make a how-to chart to keep someplace accessible so he can reference it while cleaning. Goblin.Tools Magic ToDo is great for this. Basically a lot of the time people with ADHD have trouble knowing what to do from step to step even if they've done something before, so having a step by step guide can make it easier (I have notebooks full of step-by-step guides for everything from paying for my tuition to removing licenses for my customers to weeding my yard)

Remove obstacles; don't keep cleaning chemicals in the garage in a box that's behind a stack of parts, keep them in the room you'll be cleaning. Don't keep the cleaning supplies that you use to clean the bathroom in the kitchen. Sometimes this means buying two bottles of bleach solution and two scrubbers and two sets of cleaning gloves but having fewer steps (fetch the windex, fetch the paper towels, fetch the gloves) is often the key to getting things done (open under-sink cabinet and grab windex, gloves, and paper towels that are there instead of in the kitchen).

This sort of overlaps with the next category, which is:

Create Dump Zones

One thing that I've found that seems very different between people with ADHD cleaning and neurotypical people cleaning is that neurotypical people are good at getting to a point where the cleaning is "done." They have checked off their tasks and they have finished and it is over. There are *SOME* chores that are like this (taking out the trash is a binary state, the trash has been taken out or it has not) and some chores are perpetual (horrid cursed dishes) but I think with people with ADHD, some chores that are binary for neurotypicals are actually perpetual chores. For instance "clean off the counter" is not a one and done for me. "Clean off the counter" may involve a three day reorganization project. "Clean off the counter" does not mean "wipe down the tile and put dishes away" it means assessing whether or not I need to make vegetable stock and bleaching three tea containers and reconsidering whether or not the sharps container should live somewhere else and going through the mail and figuring out what needs to be responded to and taking out the recycling and on and on and on.

We have had company at the house for the last two weeks, so I asked large bastard to clean off the dining room table, which is largely a project zone for him. Cleaning off the dining room table meant putting away his meds (and since he's a transplant patient that involves a 30 gallon rubbermade tote), throwing away some trash, and totally reorganizing his workshop. It also incidentally involved picking up a table from facebook marketplace and moving my plants, which has now involved moving my former plant rack outside (moving buckets, finding and organizing planters and gardening tools) and taking the former table to the thrift store (not done yet) and cleaning the rug that was under the former table. So "either the table is clean, or it isn't" isn't really true for us.

HOWEVER "hang on we can't eat until the table is clear so let's drive to Pico Rivera to get that console table right now" isn't a workable plan, so you create dumpzones as areas of holding between the start and the finish of the chore.

A dump zone can be a laundry basket. It can be a craft bin. It can be a back room or under your bed. It is a place to put things that you are going to deal with later because if you deal with them now it is going to derail the thing you are actually trying to do, which is set the table for dinner.

Dump zones are vital to cleaning with ADHD and I recommend them for day-to-day cleaning as well. The day-to-day dump zones might be more for you than for your boyfriend. For instance, Large Bastard works with bullets and he sheds bullets all over the house. I used to get stressed when I found bullets when I was cleaning because are these work bullets? Are these recreational bullets? Are they in testing? Do they need to be pulled? Do they go in the workshop or the office or the garage or does he need these today so they have to stay on the counter? And the answer now is "that's not my problem naughty bullets go in the jar." Which is perfectly sensible because he gets to say "mystery yarn goes in the bin" and "art supplies go in the bucket."

I feel helpless when cleaning a lot of the time. I'm frustrated and lost and I don't know where stuff goes and everything I pick up spins off into three projects in my head and every step feels like a wall to scale. Dump zones help me with that when there's pressure or a reason for cleaning beyond day to day home maintenance. People are coming over? The bedroom is a dump zone, I'll deal with that later. I'm just cleaning up because I need to? Okay I can find a permanent home for this new dish soap.

AS A VERY IMPORTANT COROLLARY TO THIS:

Active projects do not go in dump zones while you or your partner are cleaning. This may mean designating a project sanctuary area like a corner of the table or one particular chair in your main room where a project can be placed so as not to be disturbed. (if my current crochet project ends up in the yarn bin, that may mean that I don't pick the project up for another three months, it lives on the windowsill behind the couch because that's where it'll get worked on)

Do not put things away for your partner, put them in the dump zone for your partner. Your partner has to be the one to put their own stuff away in a way that works for them. I tend to find that this naturally puts a limit on the time stuff sits in the dump zone, because eventually you'll go "hey where's my thing?" and will put stuff away. If that doesn't happen, it's still generally better to have stuff in a dump zone than all over the home.

Do not decide you know what things go together from your partner's stuff and try to "put like things together." The neurotypical urge to put like things together is the mindkiller(j/k). You do not know which things are "similar" in your partner's organization schema and attempting to organize things on your own is going to end up with all of the things "organized" being functionally lost forever from your partner's perspective. Large Bastard's mom would do this and it was infuriating, she'd say "oh I put all the electronics stuff in one box" and she would mean soldering irons, transistors, ham radios, HDMI cables, and cellphone chargers. We are *still* going through boxes of stuff that she "tidied up" when he was hospitalized in 2020 and 2021.

To prevent the need for quite so many dump zones over time, you can work on setting up landing zones and "homes" for projects and tools.

Landing Zones

Landing zones are places where things go when you come inside from doing various things. Sometimes your landing zone only needs to be a tray for your wallet and keys, sometimes your landing zone needs to be a place to take off muddy boots and put a trowel and gloves down before you shower.

To make an effective landing zone, consider what behaviors you're trying to minimize and whether the people using it are ACTUALLY going to use it. For instance I was tired of the corner of my hearth getting cluttered with random junk so I hung up some hooks and put a shelf and a basket there and it became a really effective landing zone for my bag and keys and the mail, but it was VERY ineffective for Large Bastard because it's by a door that isn't the primary door he uses to enter the house. As a result I always know where my keys and bag are but he has trouble finding his keys and wallet. He tends to enter the house through our bedroom and has an overloaded valet next to the door and that's usually where his wallet ends up. Mounting a shelf to the wall above the valet and putting a basket and a hook on it will be a better place for his stuff to land. It's not that he's not using the first zone because he doesn't know that it's there, or because he doesn't care about lost time when I'm searching for my car keys after he borrows them, he's not using it because it's not by the door he uses. That's all.

I have a landing space for when I come in for gardening that's different than the one when I come in from grocery shopping. I have a landing space for when I walk into the dining room instead of the kitchen when I get home.

Landing spaces prevent stuff from piling up all over the place because they are a limited functional space that should be used frequently. Mail ONLY goes in the landing zone. If you have mystery mail or if you're not sure it's safe to toss, you put it in the landing zone. You can't let the mail get piled up too high or you won't have a space for your keys. You can't let the change in your wallet tray get too deep or your wallet is going to slide off, etc., but you also don't just put change on the coffee table or your nightstand because the landing zone is right there.

Homes for items are just what they sound like. They're the place the item goes. It lives there. My meds live on my nightstand. You would not believe how poorly I did with taking my meds on my vacation because they weren't on my nightstand. A while back large bastard lost one of his sets of sorted meds and we tore the house up looking for them because he couldn't find them in his nightstand, which is where they live. *I* found them in his nightstand because I emptied out the entire top drawer (he had only looked on the top layer) and found them underneath a radio and a hammock. Even though they were *hidden* they were in their home, so they were findable. I recently needed ink for an art class. Art supplies live in a dresser by my desk. Ink lives in the art bin or the top left drawer. The ink was not in either of these places (it was on a cabinet in the dining room behind a teacup) so it took me weeks to find it.

Sometimes the reason that ADHD spaces are so messy is because objects have been assigned homes in places that are visible and if they get moved they get lost. This is a genuinely difficult problem that requires a lot of effort to solve and can involve a lot of trial and error for creating a tidy living space. For some people, open shelving and visible storage might be a good solution. For some people, assigning a VERY clear home and inculcating that location by habit is the only way to clean up a space. For some people one very cluttered corner to at least isolate the chaos does the trick (for me and large bastard open shelving doesn't work because anything in one place for too long becomes invisible; that means that I rely on assigning things homes and large bastard relies on having contained chaos and a general idea of where to search but what that DOES NOT mean is that he is clean or tidy. His spaces look like an explosion. But he can mostly find his stuff and do what he needs to do and as long as that's limited to specific places in shared spaces I can live with it; the dining room table can be a disaster, the kitchen cannot).

People organize things differently. It often takes a while for neurotypical adults to settle into an organizational style that works for them and ADHD adults may need to settle into a new system every few months for it to continue working. The cleanup and declutter is most likely going to be a permanent project that is always going to demand some level of attention from everyone in a shared space, but "my ADHD means I can't do it" is not really going to fly. Maybe his ADHD means that he can't keep his space tidy, but it doesn't mean you can't move stuff from shared spaces into dump zones or that he can't do stuff around the house.

If he's insisting that his ADHD means that he can't clean it is possible that he's not being a shithead, he just feels helpless and doesn't know where to start and has adopted the belief that he's a useless piece of shit who can't even keep a tidy space like a grownup because he's internalized a lot of shitty attitudes (hello, my internal monologue about keeping a clean house). But it's also possible that he's just being a shithead.

It's something that's worthwhile to investigate with him. If he's unwilling to make an attempt, then he's being a shithead.

It is also not your responsibility to rehabilitate another person. If he wants to clean and it's something he feels bad about and needs some help and support with the way that someone might need help or support for learning to use a mobility aid, that is fine but you don't have to be the one who gives him that support if it's detrimental to your health, and you don't have to be the one to teach him that stuff if it's not something you're capable of. And if he is NOT interested in working on making your shared living space more accessible for you, that is not your suitcase to unpack and you just have to ask yourself the question from the start: would I stay with this person if I knew the situation was never going to change?

IDK, I'm sure a lot of this reads like "anon you must take on the emotional labor of training your partner to be an adult" but it's really meant to be more of a way of assessing yourself and your relationship. If you created landing zones do you think he'd use them? Would he get angry if you assigned a laundry basket as a dump zone for his stuff while you tidy the living room? Is living with him long-term going to be comfortable for you if nothing changes? Do you have enough of a shared definition of "mess" that you're at least in the ballpark for what counts as a clean house?

anyway good luck, and a reminder to folks that I'm compiling a bunch of adhd resources and other information on my personal website, ms-demeanor.com. It's coming along slowly but it will eventually include stuff like ADHD cleaning tips and how to tackle a hoard, so maybe keep your eye on that space.

[missyandthemisfits]

Grand Line Baby Daddies pt1

One Piece

Baby Daddy Headcannons Pt1

God Usopp

BD Usopp is so overcome with the wave of emotions he's literally crying at the news - he's scared but really excited as well

BD Usopp is probably the most neurotic parent, a literal worrywart in every sense of the word, sheltered child inbound 

BD Usopp adores your son, doting on him and praising him when he decides he wants to craft something for his father for the first time - it's not the best looking gadget but BD is brought to tears nonetheless 

BD Usopp is naturally an amazing story teller so it's cake getting his child to fall asleep - but staying asleep is another thing entirely

BD Usopp is incredibly dorky but so sweet, it's hard not love him quite honestly, even when he's this clumsy. Thankfully, he's never once dropped your child

Vinsmoke Sanji

BD Sanji really REALLY wants to tie the knot, he ain't playing around here! No seriously he asks every few weeks...

BD Sanji is slightly more doting on his child than he is with his lover but we know how he is so that's never an issue

BD Sanji has Daddy-Daughter dates twice a week without fail - and it's effing adorable, him wearing a tiara shamelessly and all

BD Sanji cooked breakfast, lunch, and dinner every single day during pregnancy and continues to cook meals curtailed to his BM and his beautiful daughter - has never once complained at the outlandish requests of either 

BD Sanji never forgets to compliment you, even on days you feel awful, because to him you really are the most beautiful creature to ever walk the Earth

Roronora Zoro

BD Zoro is surprisingly amazing with children but he's still shook when you pop out his big headed twins

BD Zoro isn't super duper affectionate but he's big on headpats and positive reinforcement when they do something that makes him proud - which is still pretty often 

BD Zoro is actually kind of skeptical about you drinking wine during the pregnancy which is perhaps the most shocking thing of all - but it's real sweet when he worries like that 

BD Zoro doesn't do any cooking, mostly cause it's bad, but will do all the hunting and gathering for his family, proudly at that 

BD Zoro wants to pass on his sword skills but is happy even if they just learn martial arts. Much to your dismay, makes them carry around tanto everywhere 

[joshiji-darlingyuyuno]

𐙚˙⋆.˚ 𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐱 𝐤𝐰𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐮𝐢𝐧 ๋࣭ ⭑⚝

synopsis: learn a little about seventeen and suin (and alittle bit of suin with ateez and aespa) kwon suin masterlist

suin's mentorship has also played a pivotal role in the musical development of the Seventeen members, particularly Woozi. As a young trainee, Woozi recalls how Suin was his primary inspiration and teacher, guiding him with unwavering patience and encouragement as he honed his songwriting skills. Her belief in Woozi's talents was instrumental in shaping him into the formidable composer he is today.

after Seventeen's first major win, Suin's generosity as a leader shone through when she gifted the members a brand-new dorm, a gesture that left them feeling deeply grateful and further reinforced their bond. The Seventeen boys, in turn, have a playful habit of affectionately referring to Suin as "noona" and gravitating towards her, seeking her guidance and protection.

the boys were obsessed with the glory (her kdrama), they'd binge it and constantly make references to it during going seventeen, even reenacting scenes during lives, concerts, or going seventeen.

they did express their heartbreak and struggle to watch the more intense scenes that involved suin's character dongeun, ex. scenes with her mother

but they were so mesmerised by all her confrontation scenes, where she would confront yeonjin or sara

its known among carats and svt that she doesn't really like to scold the members, especially the younger ones, "noona wont scold me"

suin was also a huge part of their training, she was their vocal coach, and they much prefered being trained by her than their actually teacher

as she was kind, understanding, patient, and determined to help them progress

the members have time and time again expressed their graditude regarding her teachings

and how she still continues to monitor and coach them through songs, especially as she sits with woozi while they record their vocals

and she does her best to make it an enjoyable experience, she encourages them to improve instead of shaming them for lacking

the members have openly admitted that she basically raised them

while they were trainees and lived in that small dorm, even though she was busy with her own schedules and didn't live with them, she would still see them practically everyday to check on them and feed them, sometimes even going there at 5 am to get them ready for school, making breakfast, or packing lunch for the younger ones

jeonghan even told carats that she used to iron their school shirts for them

dino and seungkwan said that, there was one time, she sercretly replaced their school shoes when she noticed they were getting too old and worn out, they pretended they didnt notice but they were so touched by her actions

it has to be said

she is the best going seventeen player (?), she somehow wins a majority of the time, she's very sneaky, especially when she teams up with jeonghan

to the point where, svt members will beg for mercy if they ever paired up

and the staff knows so they started seperating them

cause there was a time when suin even played the staff and producers

suin loves to knit, crochet, and craft

so she often makes the boys small gifts, such as, winter gloves, hats, or scarves

to the point that, they will brag to each other about her gifts

one time mingyu, came to her, pouting and sulking that dk got a scarf and he didnt (even though she made him a whole ass sweater)

according to suin, he followed her around like a duckling while she made him a scarf after he begged for one (he even asked if it could be cooler than dk's)

this also made dk sulky

so eventually just made them matching scarves so theyd stop fighting

she even made seungcheol a bucket hat after hoshi stole his, which he promptly shoved in hoshis face "HA! she made ME a hat!"

(which made hoshi a lil jealous)

she also listens to fan suggestions, such as makin woozi a rice ball hat, or wonwoo cat ears for his headphones (she also makes the member's pets gifts too)

also the members openly brag on interviews that, for special days like birthdays or when they release a solo, suin hands them her black credit card to spend on something they want

she also does this to the other idols under her entertainment. she'll hand ateez and aespa her black card when they have a win, achievement, birthday, or once hongjoong said she just randomly gave him and the members her black card on a random day saying "you all worked so hard these days, go and eat alot of meat okay?"

she booked an all expense paid trip for a relaxing spa vacation for ateez after their coachella performances

and yes she'd also make handmade gifts for ateez and aespa

but lets keep in mind

although suin is considered soft to her members n others

she is still pretty strict

ateez said that, she still will push them to be ambitious, and aim higher but be humble

a mindset she has engraved into seventeen

"did i teach you to dream small? no. never underestimate what you can do."

and svt members said they were so grateful that she didnt spoil them, especially when they werent popular, that created a mindset that push them to work hard

a treatment she did for ateez and aespa too, she never spoiled them. she told them she will never give them handouts, that everything has to be earned

if they wanted to be successful she will not, and refuse to make them famous, they have to do that on their own. through their own ambition, determination, drive, and grit.

but of course she always made sure to remind svt, atz, aespa to remember what they were doing all of this for

fans yes, but also do it for yourself.

many have praised her for this mindset. and source this as the root of why all groups under her management are successful yet humble, as they have built their own success.

suin is svt's number one supporter

she push her members to pursue what they want, especially regarding their career

she has always wanted jun to pursue acting, but he's backed out due to svt activities

but when she saw the opportunity, she told him to take it immediately.

she was the one to propose the members start doing solo activites

seventeen were the entertainers for kyungsoo and suin's wedding

svt, exo, btob, sang and hosted the wedding

and of course there was a dance battle between ateez, svt, aespa, exo, btob, and taemin

there was even a secret performance where they all did a dance routine for suin, covering her history of songs

btob specially asked to do all her sexy songs

day6 were the musicans for when suin walked down the aisle

hongjoong and woozi worked together to produce a song for them, with the lyrical help of everyone

they even shot a short film for them, clips of suin n kyungsoo, but also with the others

suin and woozi have dedicated songs to the members:

circles - wonwoo, cheers to youth - hoshi, kidult - seungcheol, yawn - seungkwan

but what fans notice (and producers/editors/staff) is how the members look at suin

they look at her with so much fondness and admiriation

they really embodied the trend "look of love" tiktok edits (iykyk)

and in this svt family, she is the grandmother

the members even directly call her "halmeoni" lovingly

as she perfectly embodies the role of a doting grandmother who cant help but adore her grandchildren

and seungcheol is her son, and jeonghan is her daughter in law lol

but who secretly likes her daughter in law more than her own son

she is the one the members run to when their parents (coups n hannie) say no "noonaaa~ hyung wont let me ...." or "halmeoniii~ dads being mean to me :<<"

she'll even play along, "aigo, you just like your father!"

or "tsk tsk, coups, please pay more attention to ur children"

haha its a joke that d.o is their grandfather, so much so that even the members play along and joke saying "halmeoni, wheres halaboji?" "aahh he's on the farm sweetie" HEHE iykyk (farmer d.o)

during game caterers, hoshi said that, one time, hoshi found suin's wallet and found pictures of the members in it, but not just their pictures, it even had some of their baby photos (she was very embarassed) they teased her endlessly, saying she really was a grandmother

then dokyeom added that, now they would even print out new photos for her to update her wallet

suin has a habit of caressing their face or hair, especially pinches their faces, she loves to do it to the older members because they dont get that treatment and only the younger ones get it

u guys know how sometimes babies or pets wuld stare at their parents while they do stuff (just cuz their curious or clingly), yeah, they do that to her

especially dino, dk and myungho

one time, dino just sat in the corner of her hotel room, while she did a live, he didn't say anything he just sat and watched her, when asked he said "i just wanted to be with you" (aww)

however, when asked, suin said that mingyu is her giant child, and coups is her sulky child

however a running gag is that whenever the boys do something sexy (such as go shirtless, etc.) when they realise suin is watching they get embarassed and run away "it feels like my mom is watching me.."

also suin is sorta nosey

so there are memes of suin sneaking glances at wat the members are doing, such as texting, or reading something

aaa okay thats it so far!! thats all i can think of, please feel free to comment any headcanon u have! im super interested in wat yall think

kwon suin masterlist

comment for requests or if u want to be on the taglist!! hehe thank youu >3<

[natalievoncatte]

“Careful with that! We have to assume everything here is dangerous.”

Lena would have preferred to be anywhere else. The last thing she wanted to occupy her afternoon was dealing with yet another reminder of her brother’s sprawling insanity. Every one of these weapons caches -he probably would have melodramatically called them “hideouts” or “secret bases”- was like a tombstone marking the grave of the only truly sincere, loving relationship she’d ever had in her life.

He hadn’t always been the slavering maniac with an incoherent obsession with killing a superhero. He’d been a protector and a benefactor, a chess opponent and a confidant, the only person in her life who presented an uncomplicated human connection, without any ulterior motives or conditions.

Everyone else wanted something from her. Money. Power. A competitive advantage. Technological secrets. Or just sex. Lena resented that most of all, the gray old men who saw nothing of her achievements or her intellect and regarded her as just another piece of ass with blue enough blood that they had to ask permission rather than simply grope.

Watching her crew load up the equipment in this sweltering heat made her physically ill, and she was glad she’d skipped breakfast. Kara would be upset if she knew.

She’s had to text Kara and let her know that she’d be out of the office and would have to skip their lunch plans. Kara was…

Kara was becoming a complication, because Kara was doing the one thing Lena wished she wouldn’t: She was giving Lena hope. She’d barreled into Lena’s life with an earnest intensity that had been bewildering at first and intriguing afterwards, with her insistence that they be friends, and constant reminders that they were friends, even as her eyes wandered to Lena’s cleavage or she unconsciously bit her lip and stared that smoldering stare just to look away at the last second.

Lena shook her head, clearing her thoughts of yet another Straight Best Friend taking her down that well-worn path of sapphic suffering. She had bigger fish to fry right now.

It was too bad that her relationship with Supergirl had been so chilly lately. It might have been easier to simply tip off the hero and the government agency she worked with and let them handle the clean up.

Lena was deep in reverie when one of the crates, a bulky reinforced one, dropped a good two feet from a forklift and the wood splintered as the locks burst free.

“Idiot!” Lena shouted at the driver. “This equipment is sensitive and potentially dangerous, and…”

“STARTUP SEQUENCE INITIATED.”

A metallic voice ground out of the crate and it shifted as something vast and bulky moved around inside. Lena stumbled back, glad she’d opted for a sensible set of flats for this, and turned to run.

A metallic claw crashed out of the crate, followed by an arm-mounted rotary cannon. The older model Lexosuit, one of the originals that Lex had planned to illegally smuggle out of the country in a fake theft scheme and sell to the Kasnians, stood up in its shaky, clanking way and took a few steps, shaking off planks and nylon straps the way a baby bird might shake off pieces of shell.

There was nowhere to go. The machine scanned the room, moving jerkily as it zeroed in on her.

Lex’s voice, a recording, boomed from its loudspeakers.

“Ah, dear sister, I see you’ve found another of my hidden fastnesses.”

You melodramatic-

“Oh well. I should thank you for setting off the security system. I won’t have to waste my precious time killing you myself. Au revoir, Lena!”

The suit spun its arm cannon and aimed at her. The barrels assembly made a half turn, the electric motor charging up as it cycled the first 32mm mass-reactive exploding shell into the chamber. Lex had once called it a masterpiece in the art of violating the Geneva Conventions. It was about to blow Lena inside out, and the subsequent shots reduce her to a the chunky consistency of a good bolognése.

But then there was a wind that was not a wind, and SHE was there.

Supergirl seized Lena with precision and grace, hands that could crush diamonds pressed just so over Lena’s ears to protect her from the roar of the guns. Lena wasn’t sure who screamed louder, her or Supergirl, as the revolving barrels ripped out their entire supply of ammunition in a few seconds, pummeling Supergirl’s back with explosions that could have shredded a tank, as the hero cradled Lena, sheltering her with her superhuman body.

When the hellstorm was over, the machine charged at them.

Supergirl did scream now, and fell upon the machine in a berserk rage. Lena had seen her in a fight before and knew she could be terrible to behold, but this was different. The empty suit was struck with such unending fury that she reduced it to shreds of metal and oil-spitting chunks of machinery in moments, spreading it halfway across the floor of warehouse.

When Supergirl rounded on her, Lena’s heart skipped. The hero’s chest was heaving, straining at the crest on her chest even as the bunching muscles on her arms and stomach pulled at the material, her perfect hair swirling around as she turned, that angelic face marred by a streak of oil and a sheen of sweat.

How dare she just look like that. It was incredibly unfair.

Before Lena knew it what was happening, Supergirl was lifting her into a heart-skipping bridal carry, pulling her much too close as she took off. On instinct, Lena pressed her eyes shut and buried her face in the Kryptonian’s neck, to hide from the heights.

Moments later they landed, and Supergirl threw Lena’s balcony door back and deposited her on her feet, leaving her stumbling back against her kitchen island in a daze. Supergirl stared at her, looming over Lena with the height difference increased by her stacked heels and Lena having lost her shoes at some point, so her stocking toes were left curling on the cold floor.

“That thing almost killed you,” Supergirl snapped. “If Is been a millisecond later you’d be dead.”

Her voice was tight with emotion, somewhere between anger, exasperation, and terror, and it felt like a fist closed in Lena’s chest.

“Are you sure you just weren’t there to make sure I wasn’t taking Lex’s old suit for a spin myself?” Lena spat, though her voice trembled. “You don’t seem to trust a thing I say lately. If I tell you the sky is blue you’ll go check.”

Supergirl’s face flushed and Lena braced for another booming, self righteous speech about trust or safety or the meaning of teamwork or some such heroic nonsense, but then her voice shattered into a million pieces and tears welled wet in her eyes.

“All I want is for you to be okay.”

A thousand thoughts danced in Lena’s mind. To ask her why, to defy her, to taunt her, to demand what exactly it was that made Lena so damned important that this woman was so intense about her safety one moment and so angry the next.

In the dance of all those thoughts, the more base instinct won out. Lena grabbed Supergirl by the neck of her suit, just below those delightful collarbones of hers, and used it as a handle to pull herself into a hard, aggressive kiss.

The world hung still for a moment, and Lena felt it all pivot around her. Something big was happening here. Something huge, something…

Something forgotten entirely as Supergirl’s tongue roughly claimed Lena’s mouth and her hands raked over Lena’s ass, dragging her skirt up.

Oh God, she thought, this is actually happening.

Lips pressed to her skin, the words burning hot into her flesh like an invocation.

“Is this okay?” Supergirl whispered.

“Yes,” Lena moaned, without hesitation.

To be continued…

[reina-tries-2-write]

The Space Between Sounds

Chapter 3: Echoes of Frustration

SYNOPSIS: Your first week at Tokyo Jujutsu Tech isn't going how you imagined it would. You are struggling to keep up with your classmates and understand what anyone is trying to teach you. What are you going to do?

WC: 2K

PREV - MASTERLIST - NEXT

You had breakfast by yourself today but ran into Tired Guy in the hallway on your way to the classroom. He gave you a smile and a wave before gesturing for you to walk with him. He didn’t say anything to you the whole time, but his quiet company was nice.

You figured he was just being polite out of pity, like all the other strangers who were nice to you.

Blond Guy caught up with the two of you in the hallway and you all walked into the classroom together.

The girl and panda are already there when you arrive and you see three empty desks between them.

Blond Guy automatically walks over to the one right next to Panda and the two begin chatting. You look over at Tired Guy, not wanting to take the spot he usually sits in, but he smiles and gestures for you to pick. Hesitantly sitting down in the middle desk, you flash him a look that asks if it’s okay that you’re sitting where you are. He replies with a wide smile to reassure you it is, and you relax into the wooden chair.

****************************************************

I ended up sat next to Y/N in the classroom today and flashed her an encouraging smile. She looked extremely nervous, and I couldn’t exactly blame her. The curriculum could be intense sometimes and not being able to hear Gojo’s lecturing was definitely going to be a challenge for her.

I made sure to take extra detailed notes just in case she needed them at any point and decided to spend the next couple of days revising my notes from the past month that she had missed. I didn’t want her to be even more behind than she already was and hoped I could help when and if she needed it.

She looked pretty confused the couple times I peeked over at her during the lecture which only reinforced my assumption that she wasn’t picking up on everything Gojo was saying.

I heard her fingers tapping on the keys of her laptop rapidly as she clearly struggled to keep up and I noticed she had a lot of blank spaces and question marks where I had notes.

I was definitely going to help if she asked.

****************************************************

Gojo comes in a few minutes later and begins to lecture. The classwork is nothing like you expected and is a lot faster paced than you would have liked. You really struggle to keep up with his speaking, particularly because he has a tendency to turn his back to you while continuing to talk.

You almost raised you hand a couple times, having written your question on a stray piece of paper but by the time you were ready to ask, Gojo had clearly moved on from the topic. The pace of the class was fast, and you were barely keeping up.

There were tons of question marks and blank spaces in your notes by the time the lecture ended, and you realized you were only getting about sixty percent of the information after peeking over at Blond Guy’s notebook. He had a lot more written down.

The five of you were dismissed for your lunch break before training. Everyone went off to the cafeteria style area that served meals for anyone who lived on the campus, and you trailed behind, not really knowing how to interact with anyone and feeling particularly meek and left out.

After picking up your tray of delicious smelling food, you found a place to sit in the corner by yourself. The food tasted just as good as it smelled, and you were pleasantly surprised by the quality. You observed the others from afar as you ate, watching their interactions and feeling quite left out due to how much fun they were seemingly having. But you knew you would just slow down the conversation and become a social burden if they invited you anyway.

Y/N sat by herself at lunch today and I decided to leave her be for now. She was clearly overwhelmed by class and a social interaction, which was obviously difficult for her, would only contribute to that.

I felt bad for letting her sit alone but Yuta and Panda came to the same conclusion which helped me feel better about it.

“Do you wanna invite her over?” Panda asks after looking over his shoulder at Y/N.

“I think she just needs some space. Class was a lot for me today so I imagine it was a lot for her.” Yuta answers, empathetic as always.

I nod my head in agreement along with Maki who wasn’t really contributing to any conversation about Y/N. I know it wasn’t anything personal, Maki is just wary around new people.

I looked over Maki’s shoulder quite often as we ate, quietly observing Y/N. She looked really defeated and would clearly zone out a little bit here and there, her utensil frozen in midair or eyes a bit glassy.

I wished more than anything I could just tell her I understood how she felt. But I can’t exactly talk, and she can’t exactly hear. So where did that leave us?

****************************************************

You went back to the dorms to change into some workout clothes because the next thing on the schedule was training which you were particularly nervous about. Despite working with Edo for six years, he never taught you how to spar or wield a weapon. Some of training was student led when Gojo wasn’t teaching and today, the girl was instructing.

You struggled to keep up with her instructions with the bow staff and you ended up fumbling around like an idiot with the wooden pole. You were so bad in fact, that you managed to hit yourself in the back of the head with the damn thing.

Naturally, your loud noise of pain and surprise caught everyone’s attention which was exactly what you needed in that moment— everyone staring at you with the pole on the ground and you rubbing the pained area.

After you hit yourself a couple more times, making a knot on the back of your head, she clearly tried to slow down for you but everyone else knew what they were doing so she couldn’t walk you through it step by step like you actually needed. She called a break, but you knew it was specifically for you to take a breather. You were getting really frustrated and upset with yourself.

Why can’t you do something so simple? I didn’t look that hard and there weren’t very many steps, but you just couldn’t figure it out to save your life.

You put the bow staff aside and tightened the laces on your shoes before stretching a bit in preparation for a run around the track. You were good at running and it gave you time to think and process your emotions.

You pushed yourself as fast as you could keep pace, the vibrations from your feet drumming on the red track drowned out the buzzing and humming of the cursed energy around you, helping you clear your mind. At least here, running around the track, you were finally in control of something. Your body would listen and could do what you asked.

Ugh, why couldn’t Edo have taught you at least a little bit on how to fight? Sure your technique was out of control for a long time but still. Even a couple lessons would have helped you not look like an incompetent idiot. That was totally helping your whole fitting in thing. They don’t know how to communicate with you and clearly aren’t trying. Or are too scared to. Why couldn’t Mari and Kai be here with you? They’d interpret for you— advocate for you. But here you were, alone in your world of almost silence, completely out of your element.

Three laps in, the girl flags you down and you slow your pace as you approach.

“You ready to get back at it?” She asks as you get close enough to read her thin lips.

You simply shake your head and pick up your pace again as you pass her. You really couldn’t bring yourself to pick up the stupid staff right now.

She gave you an odd and almost disapproving look before she continued teaching the others while you ran the track.

Great. She’s mad.

You ended up spending the rest of the allotted training period running, doing countless lap and pushing your body to its limits.

You did your best to repeat Edo’s encouraging words in your head. That your deafness wasn’t a limitation, just something you needed to find adaptations to. That you were stronger than you thought you were. That you were more than capable. That you could do it. But his words just didn’t seem to help as much as when you would see them signed on his rough, calloused hands.

This was going to be a lot harder than you imagined it would. But you were going to do your best.

****************************************************

Y/N’s struggles didn’t end in the classroom and unfortunately it looked like she had next to no experience with any weapon. Maki was teaching today and was surprisingly empathetic toward Y/N, slowing down a lot more than she normally would have and calling a break after Y/N hit herself in the head with the staff.

After an understandable huff of frustration, Y/N tossed the staff aside and began to do laps around the track. I watched her make a full lap as we took our break and she was a lot faster than I expected. She had seemingly set a good pace and was making good time around the track. I was fast but I might struggle to keep up with her.

“What’s all that about?” Maki asks, crossing her arms after gesturing to Y/N on the track.

“She’s frustrated.” Panda answers, a small frown on his face.

“Well sure but she doesn’t have to sulk.” Maki counters, brow raised.

“I think you’re forgetting she can’t hear anything you’re telling her, slow or not.” Yuta pipes up a bit timidly but saying what I would have.

I can’t exactly blame her for taking a break. Staffs are hard and I’ve gotten frustrated even listening to Maki’s instructions.

I wonder what’s going on in her head.

Five or six laps in, after declining Maki’s offer to resume training, I watched her face scrunch up in pain. Emotional or physical, I couldn’t tell. Probably a mix of both. To my surprise, she ran the rest of the allotted training time, which was quite a while. She clearly needed to vent her feelings and I really couldn’t blame her.

I’d be frustrated enough to run laps if I wasn’t able to keep up in class, but she was struggling with training on top of that too. I couldn’t imagine how she was feeling right now.

****************************************************

Unfortunately for you, your struggles didn’t end on the first day and the rest of your week was extremely difficult. You would spend hours in the library in the evenings, trying to catch up on the material you missed, desperate to catch up.

Training was arguably worse and you ended up getting frustrated and having to walk away a lot. You would do laps around the track or go into the gym to run on the treadmill when you were particularly frustrated so no one would see the tears slipping down your face. You were barely keeping up and were exhausted at your efforts to try and stay on top of things.

You knew you couldn’t ask questions since you’d only slow down the lecture or training session for everyone else and you didn’t want to be a burden to everyone.

Outside of class and training, you kept to yourself, mostly busy with trying to keep up, but even in your free time, you didn’t really interact with anyone.

You did finally start to catch onto the classwork to your relief, but you still had to work to catch up.

You were exhausted and discouraged at you experience here so far. But you trudged on, motivated by your memory of Edo and all the time he’d spent preparing you for this.

You were gonna do it for him.

[pocket-watcher]

I love your stories! If you’re down for it, may I please have a story with a hypnotic cult leader playing with their favorite adoring cultist? Maybe dressing them up, making them worship them, having them chant, or showing them off to their other jealous peers as they beam with pride. Thank you!

Thank you Anon!! I’m glad you enjoy them. Hopefully you enjoy this one just as much!

He was new to the group.

Delicious.

She watched him from afar with eager eyes as he fell into the routine. Breakfast, prayer, cleaning, lunch, teachings, laundry, worship, bathing, and bed.

Yes, he was devoted.

He’d given his name, his pride, and his body to her religion.

But that wouldn’t stop her from testing him.

He stood before her, head bowed, eyes lowered.

“You wished to see me, your holiness?”

“I did.” She looked him over as one would browse a menu.

Tall. Wide shoulders. Ginger hair. Freckles. His hands were strong. He stood proudly, even with his head bowed.

Yes, he would do.

“Recite your vows for me.”

His conditioning activated, as if the act of her simply breathing had bent his will to her instantaneously.

“I… I will love her holiness- er, you, I will love you forever. I will serve you forever. You are my reason for living…”

A smile of bliss appeared on his face as he spoke. Reinforcement, for those who were less… cooperative.

He had been broken and moulded just for her.

“I have chosen you to be my personal attendant. Come with me, we’ll get you new clothes.”

“Thank you, Mistress.” He responded in disbelief.

The others were gathered in the dining hall when she blessed them with her presence and announced it officially.

He beamed with pride all dressed up just for her. Smiling just for her. Ready to serve her personally.

She revelled in their jealousy. Some of her followers who had been with her from the beginning hid the jealously well, but she felt it radiating from them.

Extra conditioning and prayers for them. Just to ensure.

Jealous was good, though. To an extent. It motivates people wonderfully.

As her new attendant led the prayers she noticed who prayed louder. Who stood taller. Who wanted her to notice them more.

Yes.

But he still stole the show for her.

He was perfect.

And he was hers. Forever.

[bluepotion85]

Expanding Bootcamp - Epilogue

Summary: Our cadets are sent home with more money than they can expand, and life goes back to normal, or as normal as they can be after gaining so much weight in a military camp. Connor and Will have more time together to enjoy their newfound romance.

When the scientific team came to the base they found us all eating in the chow hall, from me and Connor to the Commander and Doctor Donovan. Truly a testament to our priorities. Nobody received them on the main gate or stopped them to verify their credentials, they just needed to waltz their way inside.

The only one that got into the chow hall to fetch us was Dr. Vincent, he told us his team was doing a thorough review of the facilities and that we all should get a proper shower and change of clothes. Once we were done, we would regroup on the infirmary for them to explain the results of the experiment.

When we got to the infirmary we stood in formation and Vincent Belmore with a surgical mask stood in front of us. We all got congratulations on the excellent data the scientist team could gather with our help. A part of me was skeptical on the matter and wanted to ask what he meant. but my belly rumbled begging for more food and the idea flew away from my head. I just wanted to get back to the chow and continue breakfast. . . lunch?. . . meals were blurring into one another.

Anyways, we got assigned into the different cubicles of the infirmary for a checkup and we all got a shot, apparently as a reinforcement of some type. We should pay more attention but none of us is really too worried about anything besides making this a fast endeavor.

When the health check up is done the doctors and scientific team didn't make a bug fuzz of a whole team gaining weight like their lives depended on it, the messy state of the base when they arrived or even the amount of food we have obviously over consumed.

They did explain to us that because of our weight we won't be accepted to continue in the military, but because the success of the experiment will help in future bootcamp and we passed with stellar colors we are getting a severance package that will cover for most of our needs moving forwards.

We got dismissed and we continued our meal at the chow hall, after that we started to gather our things to go back home the next day but as the day passed I managed to think more of what happened.

For an optimization experiment we did little optimization and lots of eating. Not like I can judge anyone now. My appetite came like a crashing wave on the coast once I stopped resisting my hunger. So much so I catched up to Connor’s weight and some extra.

Most of my fears of the future got erased after the fat check we got. Even if it makes me doubt even more their reason for the experiment, I wasn't about to debate the solution to my family's money issues.

Connor is back to his cheerful positive self and now he boasts about how he was right in trusting the military's choice at the beginning. And that our fears could have been an effect of anxiety or stress. I know he is saying that not only to ease himself from the situation but also to keep me calm.

Once we all got discharged, life went back to normal, everyone was sent home. We said our goodbyes and exchanged numbers with the rest of the team. We all wanted to meet up every now and then to see how much we have grown and bond like always.

Connor and I come from different cities, so we had to continue our relationship from afar, but we promised to move together with the money we got as soon as possible.

Like us some of the cadets wanted to stay together. Bradley and Salazar moved into Bradley’s farm, they both helped to improve the place and of course ate a lot of what they worked. Carlos and Hill bought an apartment in the city to start a new business with the money of the discharge, Hill helped Carlos rework a previous idea and it seems to flourish by the day.

The twins decided to say their goodbyes so Jones could have some privacy with Neil and Daniel could find himself with more freedom, and not too long after that he started to date a guy that appreciated his new body.

Our families were worried sick after months of no letters or messages. When we got back to them, explaining the radio silence was suddenly their second biggest concern. They were shocked to see me coming back from bootcamp 300+ pounds heavier. My dad joked saying we all spent the last few months at a buffet.

Then came the point of being discharged. I explained to them everything was ok and that the military dismissed us with a care package to cover for our needs. They seemed suspicious at first but after a few days with the money still being there and me still being well. . .me. They came around it. I also told them Connor and I are dating; they were happy for me, and they asked for all the details of how it came to be.

Of course, I skipped some of the more dramatic elements of our stay in Fort Celsus like the constant paranoia or the fact that after confessing to Connor, everyone in camp was also as big if not bigger than me.

Connor told me his family also took it well, and that his brother was so happy to know he is safe and happy. We continued to talk and visit each other but the distance was not for us so we moved together as planned and we enjoyed the perks of our newfound riches.

As the days passed, we settled into a routine. We wake up and go out on a walk, maybe go to the store or the local fruit market, come back home and cook. Then it's a matter of eating, passing time playing with one another or being fools in love, checking our investments on the stock market and continuing lazing around the house. Rinse and repeat and you have two fat guys having the best time of their lives.

The best part is that we have learned to enjoy the little pleasures in life, after Fort Celsus food tastes better, every kiss and grope feels more fulfilling, and any moment together is a rush.

Before the experiment neither of us had a specific taste for fatness, but now we find the extra heft of our bodies as a massive turn on. It's a bit weird in my eyes but Connor reassures me that discovery is a part of development as a person.

I won't complain on the matter though. Ever since we got out of base we both have been enjoying it to the fullest. Every meal starts in the kitchen and ends in bed, every rendezvous night starts in bed and ends with a visit to the kitchen. No wonder the growth of our bellies and appetites hasn't slowed down.

One example of our constant desire for more of everything was this morning. I wake up, the sunrays enter through the blinds in our room. Getting used to the light I turn and see a couple of beautiful blue eyes, deep like the sea itself looking at me with so much love and tenderness. Connor was up and looking at me.

“You know I'm always happy to see your gray eyes in the morning” - he says

I lean forward, moving the locks of hair away from his face and kiss him, then pulling back I add

“I love yours babe, if I can wake up like this for the rest of my days I will be the happiest man alive”

We get close and enjoy each other's embrace. I love the way our bodies clash for space, the heat we share and then we hear each other's bellies rumble for food.

We laugh it off and I get off the bed. We have split most chores, cooking being no exception and today is my turn to cook for the day. Connor stays on bed lazing off while I get food ready. In the kitchen I put on an apron and get started on the mountain of food we usually have for breakfast. To keep us satiated for the day we have lots of everything, so it takes me a hot minute to have everything ready.

I'm almost done when Connor gets downstairs. He looks at me while getting the last pieces of our feast ready. I imagine he will sit down and wait for me, but I should know better by now. Instead he gets behind me, I can feel his body pressing against me.

His belly and chest pushed against my back, smooching me as he put his arms around me. He started to rub my belly under the apron and to pinch the softness in my handles. We stay like that for a second, indulging in the moment. He rested his head on my shoulder and kissed my neck.

“Naked apron? you tease. You know I can't resist you like this” -he whispers in my ear

We both sleep naked and we have a similar combo every morning, it should get old by now but alas I can't get enough of his embrace.

I turn off the stove and kiss him back “You could never be able to resist all of this” -I reply shaking my hips and pressing back against him.

I can feel him getting railed up, he will be all over me on the kitchen floor if I don't do something. But we are both hungry and we have to get the food while it's hot, so I decide to have my cake and eat it too.

“Ok loverboy, lets have breakfast”- I say while moving the last few dishes to the table

I take the apron off and tease him by shaking my hips again while he is looking.

We have a reinforced table in the center of the kitchen where we generally eat. Using mostly the living room table for family and friend gatherings. We eat in the kitchen for easy access to extras while we have our meals, there seems to be always something more to add from the fridge once we sit down.

Connor sits across the table, he has the same hungry look on his face I have seen a hundred times now. The look that signals his craving to fill the void in his middle, but mostly the pure desire of tasting a good homemade meal.

My gut reminds me I’m hungry as well if not more than Connor. So we wish each other a good meal and get started on the task at hand.

We start the meal with care and delight in our eyes, I get some toast and stack them with eggs bacon and some cheese slices. The eggs are buttery and decadent with the now gooey cheese melting in the bread; and the crisp of the bacon contrasts everything making me feel like heaven.

Connor lets out a little moan as he is eating some waffles with fresh strawberries we got from the market and syrup. We cross glances and feel the joy of being able to enjoy a small moment like this in the calm first hours of the day.

We continue to eat, the flavor of the food and the cheer size of everything gets us going. Getting worked up we speed up. It's a weird thing to describe, the desire to taste and have more of everything in front of you. The pleasure of packing our guts with the food as if it’s the last morsel on earth. Only slowing down to mesmerize ourselves in the other's gluttony.

I grab the grilled jam slices and stuff them in my mouth alongside the rest of the eggs, when I’m moving to grab some of the waffles. I see Connor taking sausages and covering them in the syrup of his pate and eating them alongside toast going from one to the next as a well oiled machine.

While he goes in full speed his rolls get pressed as he leans forward to grab more food, his chest gets splash with sausage juice and syrup, his belly resting on his lap and his whole body jiggles with excitement from every movement he makes.

I can feel my heart racing and the heat getting to my lower half, he looks at me and notices my predicament and grabs some french toast and stuffing them in his mouth and moaning, never losing focus on my eyes. His cheeky smile makes me go feral with desire.

Taking some sausage as well I bring them to my face and lick them before eating them with gusto. At that point I can see his dick poking under his belly as we continue to entice each other in the obvious display of gluttony.

“This is some goooood food” -he says after swallowing a chunk of french toast.

“But I'm still so hungry babe, look at what your cooking is doing to me” -he adds while rubbing his belly.

I can’t hold on any more and stand up.

“You know what we need?” -I say while standing up and moving to the fridge.

I grab the can of whipped cream and bring it to the table.

“Some extra cream” - I say adding some on top of Connors food.

Connor pulls me closer. He looks at me and grabs my junk that's out and in the open, with a pleased look he starts to tease my head that's already saturated in pre. I start to moan, my dick throbs in his touch and he takes his hand away from me leaving a trail of precum, licking his fingers clean.

“I think You can’t resist all of this” -he says, grabbing his belly and jiggling it.

I took the french toast from his plate with my bare hands and brought it to his face, he opened his mouth and tried to ate it. I keep pulling it away making a mess of him with syrup and whipped cream as he struggles for more.

“Come on big guy, I'm going hungry here” -he says almost pleading with me.

I shove the toast on his lips and he ate them with a haze of lust in his eyes. More of the syrup and whipped cream are falling on top of him as I gently press the toast against him.

He looks so pleased I could melt right here but when he is done with the toast in my hand I get closer to his face and kiss him, I can taste the sweetness of the cream and the saltiness of the sausage while we go wild.

I break the kiss “You have some food on you big guy, do you mind if I have some?”

“Of course, I’m a snack” -he adds with a wink.

I lean on him and lick the whipped cream on his chest, his face exudes the anticipation of me going to the main attraction but I love to play slow.

I bite some crumps of toast on top of his nipple and attack it afterwards. I bite his nipple and suck them while he moans, I get my hand to tease his other nipple and he wriggles under my touch.

I continue my assault and move down, liking his belly and stopping in his navel; where I get my tongue into it and start to lick around it, tease him knowing it’s an erogenous zone for him.

He is huffing from the excitement looking down at me with needing eyes, before moving further down I get hypnotized by his size. The sheer softness of his belly, the stretch marks that crown his sides. All of his body begged me to crash against him, my face got to it and immersed in his expanding soft glory. My arms wrap around him or as far as I can reach, grabbing his sides and shaking it for all its worth. He laughs for a second and releases a belch from the motion.

“Well thanks I still have some room for more but that helped to make some extra space”

“Good I want you to keep going till you are ready to pop” - I say looking back at him with a cheeky look.

I continue my descent, biting his underbelly on the way down. Lifting his belly and letting it rest in my face and basking in his smell and taste. Finally I reached his cock, throbbing for attention and leaving a train of pre that shows he’s been ready to have action for a while.

I lick the tip of his dick and see him shudder in pleasure, Connor is always in the mood to go but I love to tease and edge him till he is so bothered he can’t think straight.

I slowly lick his dick around while he continues to demolish what’s on the table. He is going slower now not for a lack of appetite but because his brain is drowning in the pleasure of me playing under the table.

I let his dick rub around my face sloppily licking it every now and then, and whenever he tries to reach down to guide it into my mouth I snap his hand. I hear him get agitated and looking up say.

“Keep those hands busy eating babe, if you keep eating I promise to finish you off”

He immediately goes feral, eating scraps of eggs and pieces of french toast like they are going out of stock. Making every moan and grunt as audible as possible just to make sure I know he is enjoying the feast. His desperate need for release turns me on to no end, and I start to get his dick in my mouth.

My dick is hard and pre is pooling under me as I work on Connor, and while I could jerk myself now the pleasure I feel is so big while sucking his rod I know that if I touch my dick it will be over soon.

My tongue makes circles around his head and I bask in the taste. I have grown addicted to this as much as the food, the smell of his body, the salty taste of him, the small reactions with every lick and suction and his moans of delight with a mouth full of food, it's really to die for.

I feel him leaning back and I pop his dick out of my mouth covered in pre and drool. He looks at me, with a desperate look about ready to whine and beg for release.

“What's the matter, babe are you full?”

He belches and adds “Not even close, but you deserve some flavor down there you know”

He then took the syrup from the table and drizzled it on top of his dick. I thank him for his gesture and got back to work with redouble efforts. He grabs my head and moans louder than before, drool comes out in the corner of his mouth and a twisted smile takes over his face as his brain is shutting down due to overheating. He is getting close, so I stop. Flicking his hands away I look at his messy face and comment slowly.

“Keep going babe, I need my man to keep his tank full” - say slapping his gut and teasingly breathing on his dick

He leans forward pressing his fat in my face and eating with reckless abandon.

I continue to pleasure him till I hear his belly gurgle. I pop his boner out and he releases a deafening belch.

“Oh yeees, thats good” -he mumbles with a delirious joy.

With that I decide it is time to finish him off. I kiss his dick and dig in, focusing my effort on sucking as sloppily as I can. Driving him over the edge he moans one last time and cums a river.

I drink all I can and some of it escapes between the sides of my lips.

I climb back up to see the state of my boyfriend. He looks pleased, smiling like the winner of the lottery leaning on top of the table caressing his belly. His smile is the sunshine that covers my world, and I feel a pride overtake my chest. I can't get over how lucky I am to have him for me and me alone. I get close to him and I kiss him tenderly.

He opens his eyes and smiles at me with a pleased expression that says thank you as much as it says I want more.  

The table is a mess with the remaining food resting mostly on my end, we see each other and we know we cant let this go to waste. Besides Connor looks stuffed to his gills but I could do with some extra love.

He stands up and crashes at me in another passionate kiss.

“You have some cum on there” -pointing to the dribbles of cum on the corner of my lips.

He leans in and licks the residual cum and looks proud of himself.

“Tastes good but yours is way better, do you mind if I get some straight from the tap?” - he says looking down.

He moves the empty plates and utensils off the table and signals me to lay down. The cloth over the table is soft and makes me comfortable when it makes contact with my sweating back. A perk of having so much natural cushion back there.

The first time we tried to do this the table collapsed under our shared weight so we got the reinforced table for our regular encounters.

He leans on top of me and lets the weight press against me knowing it drives me crazy, he kisses me some more. When we break the kiss he goes down my body rubbing every crevice and every fold, playing with the softness on the way to my lower half.

When he is facing my dick, he stands up letting his belly press against my crotch

“Hi dude we see each other again”- he says to my dick while rubbing his belly against it

The pre runs around his belly as he continues to tease me. I feel his packed to the brim belly against me, and I can't wait for him to start so I try to hump his belly. He puts his hands on my legs and stops me.

“Hey we have to finish the food big guy, so get going” - he says while bringing a hashbrown to my face

I noticed he moved the food to be easily on my reach while laying on the table. I get to it right away and grab everything on sight, the hunger I had coming redouble mixing with my lust into a tidal wave I know too well. Sausages, strawberries and pieces of hashbrown fill my view while Connor makes me melt with his belly and fat rolls. He starts rubbing my dick on his belly button and I moan with a piece of waffle in my mouth

Connor starts to go down and I can feel his breath in my dick. I'm brimming with anticipation but I keep my focus on all the food.

“I need to hear you going big guy, It's the same deal you had with me but I think neither of us is ready to hold back for much longer. So, let's see”

He licks my dick and rubs it with his hand, keeping me at full mast while pretending to think long and hard.

“If you finish the rest of the food before I make you cum, I will invite you to dinner out today at your favorite restaurant, aaand you can do anything you want to me tonight. No buts or rebuttals, just free reign to your slow simmering. But if I make you cum first, we will have dinner on the local buffet to show everyone how is done and you will let me fuck you till sunrise”

“I don’t think you understand how a bet works. It sounds like I get a price in either case” -I say looking down to him playing with my dick all this time.

“Maybe but if you win you can edge and play with all my body for as long as you want, if I get my way it will be fast and loose for as long as I want”

I like the sound of that so I start to cram everything around me like there is no tomorrow.

“Hey no cheating” -he says while I glut myself

He gets started on my cock and I see stars, he is as voracious with me as he was with his food. Sucking for dear life. While I enjoy extending the fun, Connor loves to go as fast and strong as he can. Feeling his head bobble on my dick with so much strength I could swear he was trying to actually swallow my life force.

I feel myself getting close but my competitive side doesn't want to let him win so easily. I get hashbrowns by the pair and eat them in two to three bites, grabbing the waffles and french toast double fisting them, covering them in syrup so they go down easily. crumbs cover my chest and face, drips of grease fall on my cheeks and syrup runs down my neck as I go.

My stomach is getting full, Connor is getting me so close my feet curl and my brain gets fogged in ecstasy. And when the last piece of food hits my gut I let loose a final belch and cum in his mouth a bucket of seed.

He comes with his mouth full of my seed and drinks it in front of me making an exaggerated look of delight.

“Mmmm you taste so nice love, thanks for dessert”

We both stand up and see our mess, both bellies filled to the brim, balls empty and the table a disaster. Another good morning in my book.

Since I came after the last thing hit my gut I won, but we decided to do both ideas. At lunch we will go to my restaurant and, at dinner we can glut at the buffet. And when we come back home we can do everything under the heavens. There is no rush though, we have all the time in the world to explore our options.

After cleaning the kitchen we get to the shower and we play with our bodies while we help to clean each other. But we stop before having another session in the shower, we have to save some energy for later.

With a full stomach and both clean we set ourselves in the coach in front of the tv. He leaned against me like that night in the watchtower and we took turns rubbing each other's belly to settle the food we just ate.

“I love you Will”

“I love you too Connor”

“I hope you are ready to have more to love, cause we are not slowing down anytime soon”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way”-I reply and kiss him

I may not know what happened during our stay in Fort Celsus that caused everyone's changes. But if it leads to me having this moment with my best friend and now partner then I'm happy I got my name called in that list at bootcamp.

Hi again everyone, first of all thanks again for all the support and beautiful comments in my last posts. With this we are closing the story of Fort Celsus and Expanding Bootcamp, but the world of Connor and Will can always continue. I'm looking forward to more stories and new challenges from now on, so if any of you want to see something new from me let me know!

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[imabeautifulbutterfly]

Once Upon a Time on the Razor Crest

Summary: Din let's out a little more than he should

A/N: Hello lovelies,

Well hello gorgeous people, I'm posting this earlier than usual because I'm going to get my hair did and then I'm busy. Last day of vacation before I go back to work on Monday. Unfortunately, I didn't get as far with my writing as I wanted to during my vacation. Mainly because I was enjoying reading, sleeping and chilling way too much. But it's all good, because things are brewing in this head of mine.

Hope everyone has an amazing first 2024 weekend.

Love oo

Due to the past history of the OC there will be discussions alluding to past domestic abuse, please note that as it could be a trigger for some.

Warnings: tension, accusation of using someone, dealing with anxiety, misdirected anger, I think that's about it, if I miss any warnings please let me know.

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Main Master List   |  Once Upon a Time on the Razor Crest

THE CRESTWORLD

CHAPTER TWO

My eyes glanced over Din one more time before I turned back to focus on Gorgu. 

Truthfully, I’d been surprised when he agreed to leave Grogu and I here, especially since it hadn’t even been a month since I joined them. 

However, he reminded me that a neighbour, a good one, was the difference between life and death out here in God’s country. It was a phrasing Din made sure to repeat at least twice a day since I joined him on the ranch, to help me realize and understand why having neighbours you could count on made all the difference. Seeing him willing to take off and help his neighbour simply reinforced his strong sentiment.

Kuiil no doubt appreciated the help from Din, especially when he almost lost his livelihood, because his flock of sheep took off, it was something that could’ve been detrimental to him.

I understood why he had to leave, but seeing as I was still new in taking care of his own livestock, granted it was only two horses, a nerf and nunas, it was still nerve wracking to be responsible to look after them. Din was gracious enough to write out detailed instructions on what needed to be done during the time he was away, which eased my anxiety somewhat, and really he wasn’t in the mood to have a tete-a-tete when he gave me the instructions, he was too annoyed and upset to discuss if he should or shouldn’t leave.

There was not much to discuss anyways when he still had that same attitude, I ignored his comment about Grogu’s lunch and paid attention to the adorable child eating his pancakes. 

“That’s no fun, right Grogu? Having the same lunch twice in a row?”

“Yup, Annie”

He wasn’t exactly comfortable around me, despite the amount of time we had spent together, but he was slowly opening up. He stopped hiding behind his father whenever he saw me, which was a huge step forward. He even liked it when I sat beside him during meal times. However, during the two days Din was away, I did notice he started to answer my questions more, which I believe was slowly helping us to grow more comfortable around each other.

“Okay, how about …” I looked in the fridge quickly, “how about a grilled cheese with veggies and fruits for tomorrow? Sounds good?” I asked as I took a seat beside him, eating my breakfast, as well.

He simply nodded as he ate his pancake, humming contentedly as we both danced while we ate, it wasn’t the best etiquette to have at the kitchen table, but if it allowed him to open up more to me and feel more comfortable, I was willing to do the little things I could.  

“You don’t have to do that.” 

Din’s miserable voice washed over them, as his eyes glanced from Grogu to Ann overtop his mug. He didn’t know why but something about her was starting to irritate him, or maybe it was just the exhaustion he felt from helping Kuiil round up his wayward sheep that was making her more irritable than usual. Either way, he wasn’t in the mood for her happy persona or the fact she somehow grew closer to Grogu while he was away.

“Do what?” 

I asked as I finished my tea and breakfast. I grabbed the empty plates and took them to the sink. He still hadn’t answered my question, as I packed up Grogu’s lunch that I made the previous night. I double checked Grogu’s backpack as I put his lunch bag inside, making sure he had everything ready for class, “Grogu, where’s your homework?”

“Grogu, get your homework” Din stated as he motioned with his head for his son to leave. His annoyance was at an all time high and he wasn’t able to hold back any longer. 

“Patu?” Grogu tilted his head as he shrunk back a little into himself. He knew his father could have a temper, though it was rarely seen, but somehow Grogu felt he may have done something wrong. 

Din noticed Grogu’s reaction, he leaned over and ruffled Grogu’s hair, and cupped his son’s cheek reaffirming that he was fine. He gave him a subtle smile, “It’s alright buddy, just get your stuff.” 

He watched as Grogu nodded and headed off, leaving him and Ann alone in the kitchen. There was something he needed to make very clear with her, and he didn’t want his son having to listen in to this particular conversation. As soon as Grogu was out of ear shot, he took the opportunity focusing his glare at Ann.

“Listen, I’m going to say this once and only once. I appreciate your help Ann. I’ll admit since you joined things have been going smoother, and I appreciate that you stepped up when I had to be away, but there’s something you need to keep in mind”

Silence filled the kitchen as I looked at him, there was something about the way he was keeping himself constrained that made me get my back up. I’m not sure what exactly triggered him or made him so irritable, but I felt as though I just walked through a minefield. Somehow, I was very close to setting him off, the wrong word or question and it seemed as if his self-control would evaporate. I took a deep breath and pushed away my nerves. Keeping my voice steady as I locked eyes with him.

“What’s that?”

“You’re. Not. His. Mother.” 

Din’s voice was laced with warning as his hand clenched around his fork, “You’re here to help, got that! So don’t use my son to try and get close to me. Understood!” 

As soon as those last words left his mouth, he saw how taken aback she was, and for a split second, he could have sworn there was a look of utter pain and disgust across her face.

My hands clenched around Grogu’s backpack, it took all of my strength, all of my patience, every last ounce within me, not to recoil or run away. For the first time since my ex, I actually wanted to yell at someone for saying something stupid and accusing me with an ulterior motive. In my head, I screamed, ‘WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING!’ But at this point, it wouldn’t have helped either of us. I took a moment, closed my eyes, took a deep breath and counted to ten to steady my nerves and quell the beginnings of anger in my heart. 

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[shockingshinx12-shinx]

In the authors notes for your fic "a dog's breakfast" you mentioned that you have a lot of opinions about Clockwork's involvement in TUE. I am curious what your opinions are, cause I've got some of my own, and I wonder how much they align.

I spent several hours typing up a response to this earlier and I hit something and tumblr DELETED IT WHILE I WAS MID-WAY THROUGH!!!!! SO I HAD TO RESTART AGAIN JHGDFGHGDF sorry for the delay o7

BUT BOY HOWDY DO IT, A LOT IN FACT!! I already dragged 2 of my friends to watch the ep. so I could give them the full rundown of what I'm talking about, so thank you for enabling me cause I love talking about this! Buckle in cause I have ADHD and tend to word vomit, so I hope this all makes sense

I'm sure you've seen a million bajillion people say this already (plus your own thoughts, opinions, and observations) so this may all be stuff you know, but the OG ep is filled with several time paradoxes that make absolutely no sense, which can probably be attributed to the writers not really caring about the logistics of a kids show time-travel ep. But if you wanna look at it from an in-universe standpoint,Clockwork is directly responsible for the events of TUE in both Dan and Danny’s timeline

Let’s start with what we know: (Also, sorry for the crunchy screenshots, I work with what I got)

CW sends Box-Lunch back in time to fight Danny, which causes the Nasty burger to be condemned/abandoned for several days

CW sends Skulk-Tech back in time, which causes the heating element to start heating up the vats of Nasty sauce

Danny and Co. beat Skulk-Tech which transports them to CW’s lair and forces them to flee to the future to escape his “wrath”, which then gives Dan a chance to escape to the past to recreate the NB explosion and ensure his continued existence

OK SO! These are the key points!

Dan Mentions during one of his Spiels to Danny that his loved ones died in an explosion at the Nasty burger, which is reinforced by Vlad when Danny goes to him for help. Similar enough events to what we see in the episode.

The Nasty Burger explosion wouldn’t have happened if Clockwork hadn’t sent Box-Lunch and Skulk-tech to the past. Their direct influence on the present-timeline is what set up those dominoes. This means that CW interfered and fucked Dan over intentionally in his timeline and didn’t do anything to change, or fix what he caused.

The heating element wouldn’t have been left on and unattended if Danny didn’t have to fight Box-Lunch, and the sauce wouldn’t have exploded if Skulk-Tech hadn’t crashed and pushed the element towards the vats.

There’s something to be said about leaving dangerous equipment unattended, so even if Skulk-Tech hadn’t crashed into the kitchen, there’s a chance something else in there could’ve caught fire and triggered an explosion, but it would’ve been at a completely different time, and could’ve potentially been caught and stopped by repair crews (potentially). Skulk-Tech’s involvement ensured the explosion happened sooner. You could also argue that Danny’s fights take him all over the city, and you’d be correct. There’s a possibility that, if Box-Lunch hadn’t been sent back and Danny was fighting one of his other present-day rogue’s, they could’ve accidentally gone crashing through the NB as well; but it’s not guaranteed to have the same result as the Box-Lunch fight. All his Rogue’s are vastly different, with different strengths, weaknesses, fighting styles, and reactions. For example, there’s no guarantee that if Johnny 13 and Shadow went flying through the NB, they’d stay long enough for Danny to think of using the sauce as a weapon against them. Not only that, but it's not guaranteed he'd fight more than one ghost that day. From what we see, none of his usual rogue's bug him during that specific day, so there's a chance he doesn't even fight anyone at all.

If it could be done by anyone else, CW wouldn't have gone through the trouble of pulling ghosts from the future. We also know Dan has met CW before and knows what he does, very specifically stating “Clockwork! Meddling again". So clearly he knows what Clockwork's done, at least to some degree.

Not to mention, Clockwork seems like a chaotic neutral character at BEST. Why would he see fit to completely ruin Danny’s life in the first place? Him going out of his way to do such a thing just doesn’t make sense to me, I can’t see him doing that on purpose, but the events ONLY happen due to his interference. Clockwork is initially shown as only intervening and sending Box-Lunch back because the Observant's ask him to, but if that’s the case, what caused the Nasty burger explosion in Dan’s timeline? Sure, Clockwork is mischievous like anyone else, we see it in the way he slams Danny repeatedly into a bell, but he’s not outright malevolent.

Also quick side-note, Valerie outright blames Phantom for causing the explosion but we know for a fact that Danny didn’t want that to happen, he was literally heartbroken. This could be interpreted a couple different ways I suppose; -One being: that Danny was flying around as Phantom post-explosion while trying to find his family in the rubble and the public wrongfully blamed him again. But that can’t be possible because Danny Fenton WAS found at the scene of the explosion. The paper outright says he was the lone survivor, so if Phantom was flying around, no one would've been able to find "Fenton" at the scene. -Or two being: a different future evil version of Phantom caused the explosion in Dan’s timeline just like Dan did in Danny’s timeline, which is just as impossible as the first option, but more in line with the canon we're given. If he did, Dan would’ve known he was going to lose and would've done things differently, accounted for his previous versions mistakes, not to mention he says Danny shouldn’t get the ghostly wail for 10 more years, plus his surprise that Jazz knew about his secret. If Dan really did have to face a jerky version of himself in his timeline before the explosion, he would’ve acquired the wail long ago and seen Jazz's note. Not to mention present-timeline Danny is grossed out by the idea of having his humanity ripped out. I’d apply that same “grossed-out” feeling to Dan, even if he is mega-depressed after moving to Vlad’s. But also, Dan is only created due to Skulk-Tech and Box-Lunches intervention in the past, who only come into creation due to Dan's rampages in the future. This option would also mean there’s an infinite amount of Phantom’s being displaced in time, constantly, but Clockwork only has the one thermos.

That also brings up another issue.

The Observants make it seem like this is a “first”, but  if the explosion only happens cause of Clockwork’s interference with ST and BL in the past, which causes Dan’s creation, then in some timeline before Dan’s- Danny had to become evil to enable the right conditions for each of those “new” ghosts to exist. This means Dan was doomed from the start, the cards were stacked against him, and this loop has been going on for an indeterminate/indefinite amount of time. (Idk if that makes sense, I’m really bad at explaining my thoughts in ways people understand so I made a diagram. Hope this makes the point I’m trying to make clear?)

Ok with the ghosts out of the way, what about the answer booklet? Danny wouldn’t have obtained the answers to the CAT if he hadn’t gone flying through Mr. Lancer’s briefcase at the NB.

This next part contradicts my statement that Dan’s timeline is partially a circle that feeds itself, but bear with me. I attack this from different angles (cause technically both these angles may or may not co-exist at the same time cause this whole ep. Is a mess and we already have an incursion that conflicts with other stated facts of canon JHGDHGJFGHFD this also treads a little more into headcanon area, so I guess take it with a grain of salt if you feel I'm reaching)

Danny seemed genuinely surprised the booklet was there, and his eyes went wide at the prospect that he even could study the answers, like it hadn’t even crossed his mind before that moment. I’d like to think that he wouldn’t have even thought about that being an option till after the test, in a comedic “Man, I’m surprised you didn’t just steal the answers” comment from Tucker which would have caused Danny to facepalm so hard.

 We’re never actually given the reason why in Dan’s timeline, he and his loved ones were at the Nasty Burger. Clockwork just says “He turns evil? ‘Cause he’s under pressure from some ‘test’?” which isn’t really a confirmation of anything other than he’s “stressed”, and Sam and Tucker just assume that Danny cheating is the cause with no further evidence than that. Sure, Dan cheats to lure everyone to the Nasty Burger, but that’s because he knows it’ll work. I have reason to believe that in his OG timeline, that’s not exactly how events went down, that he was framed.

This little assumption of mine is based on a few context clues we’re given: First; Danny seems genuinely concerned about doing a good job on this test. He’s actually trying to study for it, he’s putting in the effort, even if he says he quits just before Box-Lunch's assault.

Second; Why were Tucker and Sam at a parent teacher conference that was meant to be between the Fenton’s and Mr. Lancer?

Third; We have the line Lancer says to Jazz when she mentions he has no proof Danny stole the cheat sheet, “Fair enough. He has up until the test to return the answers. BUT! If he cheats, I won’t just fail him, I’ll DESTROY his future!” This shows Lancer has already cemented in his mind that Danny has stolen them, and nothing can convince him otherwise. Cause Jazz is right, Lancer has no proof Danny stole the answers. Sure, he overheard Tucker say something to Danny about not cheating, and when he looked in his case they were gone, but that’s not really grounds for anything. The operative word in Tucker’s statement was “thinking”, which should've cued anyone who was eavesdropping in that Danny hadn’t done anything yet. (IK he has the answers at this time in the ep, but that’s besides the point I’m making here) (Also, the specific quote Tucker says that Lancer overhears is: “Yeahh, you’re right. You’re not thinking of cheating on a test that you’re convinced will determine your future.”) Anyway, despite not having proper proof, he’s already hellbent on ruining Danny’s life no matter what the truth might be.

Fourth; No one gives us specific details about what happened in Dan’s timeline, they’re all based on vague details, assumptions, and jumped conclusion. 

I wanna say in Dan’s OG timeline he never actually steals the answers. Lancer was literally walking around everywhere with that briefcase, It’s got a giant target painted on it due to him hand-cuffing it to his wrist. Now I’m not gonna say I know the logistics of stealing shit, but from what I’ve seen of irl lockpicking videos, and the fact that while the briefcase has 2 locks, Lancer only needed to use his key to unlock 1 side, it would be stupidly easy to open his briefcase, anyone could’ve done it. It’s just a matter of distracting him long enough to get it open.

If someone else stole the answers Dan probably would’ve still been Lancer’s main suspect, due to his grades, attendance, running out mid-lesson, and all that other jazz (pun intended), as well as the fact that we already know Lancer shows favoritism towards some students, so he wouldn’t suspect them right away, if at all. It makes Dan the perfect scapegoat in that situation, a bad student, woefully unprepared for the exam of a lifetime, trying to ensure he doesn’t fail, that gets into mischief all the time. 

It’d explain why he and his family were called to the Nasty Burger, as well as why Sam and Tucker might be there. They could’ve been trying to defend him from the accusations, trying to build Danny’s case, and demand or plead that Lancer not do anything rash. 

The explosion still would’ve had to be caused by CW’s intervention of sending ghosts from the future, which I know doesn’t make sense with how Danny gets the CAT answers, but this idea that Dan’s innocent plays with the fact that no one makes it seem like Danny actually cheated in Dan’s OG timeline. This headcanon makes no sense and I’m well aware of that, but for all intents and purposes, I never saw Dan as being guilty of cheating, it's all flimsy here-say. Not to mention him losing all his friends and family for such a thing is an unjustly cruel punishment for everyone involved, and is extremely stupid. (That being said, I'm not saying Danny ISN'T capable of cheating, I'm just stating he wouldn't cheat here specifically)

He was just painted in a bad light, wrongfully blamed for something he didn’t do, and he’s just a kid who went through something awful. Everyone has it out for him in this scenario, and everyone keeps telling him he’s a monster. Valerie spends 10 years of their future supposedly blaming Phantom for the death of his own friends and family, so if that’s all he’s ever told, of course he sees that as being the only way. (Now I'm not saying Dan's innocent of murder and shit, just that he didn't do what was accused of him before and immediately after the NB explosion)

Anyway, my conclusion to the above is a restatement from earlier, and the TLDR is; none of it makes any goddamn sense, and none of it should’ve happened. Clockwork doesn’t seem like an outwardly malignant ghost, so him going and messing with Danny doesn’t make sense, but TUE only occurs because he crafted that series of events. Also the fact that Danny turned into Dan in a countless number of repeating realities/timelines before Clockwork was forced to stop it by the observants. (And also my headcanon I guess that he didn’t ACTUALLY cheat). 

I got a bunch more opinions on other stuff tho. Like about the Nasty burger, the logistics of Dan going to the past the way he did, Danny’s ghost half being ripped from his human half and why phantom did what he did afterwards HJGFDGFGD but this post’s already kinda long so I’ll leave it for another day if you wanna hear about it!! I love talking about this sorta thing so feel free to ask away

Hope you enjoyed my little rant!! And I desperately hope it makes sense HGDFGFJHD

WAIT EDIT: ALSO ALSO, IK everyone loves to depict CW as a mentor figure to Danny whose caring, but that is not the vibe I get from him at ALL. As I said, I think he's a chaotic neutral character at best

[abusivelittlebunny]

Can't stop thinking of this fic idea I had for Logan x Donald that's making me so soft it hurts....

Falling in and out of Love

Basically Logan and Donald settle down in a little house on the edge of a small town in Canada, to raise Laura. Logan is sure it's only temporary at first, he only started fucking Donald a couple of months ago "out of accident" as he claims ("Accident? Did you fall and land dick first in his ass?" Is what Logan's few friends ask him); they're not in a relationship. They're not. Donald just took it upon himself to help them find a place and move in too and share a bed with Logan; and Logan would love to kick him out or kill him (or so he claims) but the bad thing is, Donald is much better at the whole playing house than he is. Donald gets Laura into the local school with extra classes to catch up with her peers and get a good education, and he gets Logan a surprisingly well enough paying job as a driver in this new town ("Did you suck or threaten the guy who'd be my boss?" Logan sneers and Donald just coos "Shut the fuck up, you ungrateful dick." And adds a little kiss on his cheek). Besides that Donald is better at upkeeping the house and he's... a fantastic cook. Logan hates to admit it but it's true.

It's not some gourmet culinary shit but food that warms your soul and is always seasoned right; hell, even coffee tastes better when Donald makes it even though it's just the same instant powder and hot water. Laura, who's been their grumpy edgy princess this whole time warms up to Donald surprisingly fast from all those delicious home-made casseroles, muffins, fried chicken, pancakes and waffles he makes that are just mind-numbingly good. He got the waffle-maker from the house of a guy he was hired to beat some money out of (because of course HE couldn't be fucked to get a normal job, no, he's now working for some agency to be a little reinforcer and hit-man for hire with his other mercenary dogs following loyally behind him). He was so happy when he brought it home too, beaming like the sun and squealing like some little girl about how happy he was that now he could make Laura some killer waffles. Logan first rolled his eyes but those waffles WERE fucking spectacular.

The situation quickly changed from a temporary arrangement to a weirdly comfortable and domestic one: Logan woke up every day to Donald nuzzling against his jaw, peppering him with sleepy kisses and rubbing at his morning wood. If Logan was too sleepy still to roll over and fit himself between Donald's thighs to lazily rut into him eased by the plentiful mess he left in his hole the night before, Donald would just get under the covers and blow him expertly, swallowing his load down and kissing up his torso afterwards, planting a cheeky kiss to Logan's lips that always made him grimace before getting out of bed and pulling on some sweatpants to go down and make breakfast while Logan went off to shower and get ready for work. He'd always come downstairs to see Donald in his cute little apron swaying his hips to some old country music that made Logan roll his eyes but the moment he'd sit down at the table Donald would pour him his coffee and give him a warm plate of buttered toast, scrambled eggs and bacon. Sometimes he switched the menu up, but the breakfast was always filling but not weighing him down. Laura would come downstairs, eager to receive her portion and Donald's sweet treat of the day, be it waffles, pancakes, cookies or muffins, that even Logan couldn't deny himself a couple of.

Donald was just... like a perfect old-school housewife from the movies, keeping his and Laura's spirits up in the early morning and packing them both lunches to take in to school or work, with plenty of fruit and veggies to keep them healthy. Donald had work start later in the day so he sent them on their way with a kiss to Laura's forehead and another kiss on Logan's lips right outside the door so the nosy neighbors could get an eyeful as Donald purred "have a nice day, honey♡". Not what they expected of the tatted up mercenary with the robot arm for certain, but Logan did have people in the grocery store tell him what a lovely family he has while he was struggling to find everything Donald wrote up on his shopping list. After work he'd come home to Donald cooking dinner with Laura studying and doing her homework at the dining table so Donald could ask her about her schoolwork and even help out, and Logan would just sit near on the sofa, watching with utter peace before they sat down to have dinner together. He never really thought he'd have this, this domestic bliss, watching his ...daughter and his.... well. Partner? It seemed they involuntarily slipped into something like that. But watching them talk and laugh and share a really fucking good meal and afterwards curl up on the couch and watch a movie or anything really that was on the TV before Laura headed off to bed with a yawned good night to them both.

And then it was just him and Donald snuggled up, quiet for a while, before Donald kissed his neck and whispered "I missed you today," and then he'd kiss back instead of admitting that he missed him too and before long they were fucking hot and heavy on the couch (sometimes slipping down onto the floor) with Donald's arms and legs wrapped around him tight enough to bruise but Logan gripped him with just as much need. Donald would give out those sweet little noises of his and gasp for more more always more, but try to keep it quiet in case Laura was still awake. It felt good, crashing down between Donald's thighs after a long day and rut out the daily pent up frustrations, but what he really liked was after that, after he let Donald go to take a shower while he washed the dishes, after that, when he was warm and relaxed and done with every chore of the day and he went up to their room, and changed for bed, and went to the bathroom to brush his teeth while watching his pretty boy clean his pretty body before helping him towel off between kisses and then. Then. When they had nothing else on their mind but feeling each other and they could take their time as they stumbled into bed to fuck to their heart's delight. When he didn't feel rushed by his own needs so he could eat Donald out until he was a shaking whimpering mess, or when he could let his boy take control and tie him to the bed and ride him to heaven and back or when they just took their time touching and kissing and... Logan didn't want to use the phrase "making love" but that was exactly what it was. And Donald wasn't the type to be up for any of that sappy shit before, but things were different now, and even if they ended up fucking hard and brutal and nasty four times in a row, they always made time for a final soft and loving round where they ended up falling asleep tangled in each other with Logan's cock still lodged in Donald's warmth.

But then one day, maybe six or eight months after they moved in, Logan came home to Donald not being home. He didn’t think much of it, Donald sometimes arrived home late, blaming work, sometimes even arriving in the early morning if a job proved to be needing it. Logan just heated up the leftover pasta bake they had and fed Laura and himself before plopping down to watch TV. Laura watched it too for a while but headed off to bed earlier. It wasn't the same without Donald constantly commenting to what was on the screen. He initially thought he'd wait for Donald to come home but after midnight he thought he might as well do all that waiting in bed.

But Donald didn't show up, not even in the morning. It didn't taste as good when he made his own buttered toast and coffee, and he could see Laura looking around for Donald before resigning to Logan's scrambled eggs, which were nowhere near as good as Donald's. They were just eggs, and she could make do for a day, no? He gave her some money to buy lunch, but ready made sandwiches seemed like crap after Donald's carefully created homemade packed lunches of joy. Nevermind. They still had the leftover casserole for dinner at least, and Logan wrapped up the last piece for when Donald comes home. But he didn't come home again that night and Logan packed that piece up for Laura to take in for lunch the next morning.

Laura didn't say anything just munched on her overcooked egg on toast. Logan thought about where Donald could be all day through, the bastard left no messages, and he even attempted to call him at his lunch break, but there was no answer. He knew there was no reason to be frustrated about the situation but when he got home late that night and he was met with Laura asking what's for dinner all he could do is sigh and curse Pierce while dialing up the local pizza joint. He thought of Donald coming home late that night, and how he'd be grumpy fuck with that blond bastard for just taking off without a single message and how Donald would have to be sucking his dick nonstop for a week if he wanted Logan's forgiveness and how good it will feel to have him grovel and whine for cuddles at night which Logan will only give if he's in a generous mood. He went to bed warmed by these spiteful thoughts.

But he felt like a failed parent when all he could offer up for next morning's breakfast was leftover pizza; but at least Laura didn't complain openly, she must have seen the toll Donald being gone took on him. He attempted to cook that night. Strong emphasis on attempt because Donald really made baking a casserole look easy when it was really not and they had to end up scavenging through the half-over-, half-undercooked pasta bake Logan could come up with. Laura ended up sneaking a bag of tortilla chips to her room that they'd only ever open for movie nights and retired early saying she has a lot of studying to do. They all knew Laura liked to study right there where they were, but without Donald, Logan wasn't that great a company. He blamed having a rough day at work on smashing that awful casserole against the wall that he had to clean up for two solid hours, but Laura didn't say anything when she saw the stain on the wallpaper or the bits in the trash the next morning.

The fourth morning with no Donald. Logan drank himself to the floor after the casserole incident the night before so with his pounding headache all he could manage was coffee and butter sort of smeared on toast. Laura saw how he looked like a sack of wet shit ran over by a truck and attempted to cook an egg which resulted in an abstract sunny side up that made her finally ask "When is he coming back?" To which Logan could only groan, "I don't know, kid. I really don't know." The night before, when he was fucking raging at his own incompetence he thought if Donald walked through the door now, he'd punch his lights out for being gone without a single call or message. Beat him to a pulp and then fuck him so hard he'd beg for him to stop with tears. But after that day, where he left six messages on Donald's phone and bought ready-made meals and cans of soup to make dinner out of and watch Laura eat with no joy whatsoever and a very pitying look thrown at his direction, he went to bed thinking he'd do anything to wake up to Donald in bed with him. He wouldn't be mad. He'd just ask him not to do it again.

But he didn't. Fifth morning without Donald left him feeling heavy like a stone as he made sunny side up eggs and buttered toast for breakfast. Laura wrinkled her nose when she bit into hers and the yolk spilled out. "He always makes it just right so it doesn't get all runny." She muttered to which Logan replied after taking a sip of his coffee that seemed too fucking bitter that morning with, "Well, he's not here, is he?" Laura didn't say anything else. When it was just the two of them, it was very quiet. Donald previously joked that it was because they were so fucking similar, that if they had nothing to say they just didn't fucking say a thing. When Donald was around though, they could talk like a normal fucking family. Family? What family? They were not a family. Laura was just fucking grown out of his DNA and Pierce was a fucking enemy of his before they stumbled into a fuckbuddy relationship and since Logan killed Donald's previous boss, he wouldn't be getting paid for capturing him so he just stuck around for some dick. Logan was only filling his head with those stupid old movies Donald loved to watch where the mommy and daddy were living in domestic bliss taking care of their child and he projected that fairy tale nuclear family idea onto their fucked up situation. His dinner was beer and macaroni salad from the gas station he brought home after he volunteered for an extra late shift just so he wouldn't have to face Laura that night, but checking the trash at least he knew she ate one of the pre-packaged sandwiches he got her for dinner.

Sixth morning Logan woke up to Laura crunching down on cereal at the breakfast table. He not only overslept, but he never made it to his bedroom (his bed felt too cold without Donald and he thought he was going slightly crazy being there but not feeling Donald's body in his arms). He only had time to pour some coffee into his thermos and Laura handed him a mugful of cereal to eat while he drove her to school. "Where did you get this?" Logan asked while driving, the cereal in the mug surprisingly not a bad idea, and Laura just shrugged.

"You always give me too much money for lunch. I had extra to buy some cereal and snacks on my way back from school."

Logan sighed, "That's for you to save up and buy yourself something nice." Laura frowned at that.

"But that's what I did."

"No, I don’t mean food. I buy you food. That's for me to do."

"Why?"

Because I'm your father and I need to take care of you even if I'm bad at it, is what Logan wanted to say but the words stuck in his throat. "Just because. I'll buy you cereal and whatever you like just... write me a list, okay?"

Laura sighed, and it would have been so much like Logan if not for the dramatic eyeroll, which was so much like Pierce it made Logan's heart clench.

On his lunch break he didn't have the patience for his coworkers; usually they tried to make friends, banter, joke about with him, they've been teasing him too lately for being a sour cunt because his "he-missus" was gone on a work trip, but he couldn't be bothered to deal with them right now, even if they didn't mean any harm, so he went into town to grab a bite at a good enough diner, the one he went to with Pierce and Laura the first night they arrived in the town, tired and hungry. Then the food felt like fucking heaven, but then again, he got spoiled on Donald's cooking since.

When he went in to order himself a burger he didn't expect to see Laura sitting in a booth doing her school work with Pierce's sunglasses perched on her head with a half eaten burger and milkshake by her side. Logan walked over to her, and when she finally noticed him, she looked like she got caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Logan just sat opposite of her in the booth and corrected himself to the waitress saying he'll dine in instead of take away, "And, I'll be paying for my daughter's meal as well, okay?" And the lady just nodded, but when he turned back to Laura, the sunglasses on her head were pulled down to cover her eyes.

"I told you I'll pay for your food." Logan sighed but Laura just looked away, out the window, taking sips of her milkshake. She usually preferred the chocolate one but now she was drinking strawberry, Donald's favorite.

"You are. You gave me money for it this morning. The school cafeteria just sucks."

"Don't you still have classes?"

"Not for another hour. I still can't take some classes together with the others because I'm too behind. But Miss Bundy said I'm catching up quick in the afternoons."

"That's good to hear." It was really Donald's merit for helping Laura study normally every day after school; Logan wasn't good at that stuff. "I'm sorry I can't help you like he does."

Laura shrugged, knowing instantly who Logan was referring to. "It's not like he's a hyper genius or something. Sometimes I tell him stuff he didn't know or at least pretends he didn't to make me feel smarter. But it's still nice. Even when he curses out my math homework and he asks me to explain it because he's too dumb for it." She hid her smile in her palm, resting her chin on it and gazing out the window to avoid Logan's gaze. "It's fun with him."

Logan swallowed thickly. "I know, babygirl."

"I miss him." Laura sounded very small then.

"I know." Me too.

"Do you think he'll come back soon?" Laura bit at the nail of her thumb. If Donald was here, he'd tut at her playfully and tell her she shouldn't ruin her nails like that. She did it before, in the beginning, but stopped the habit after Donald painted her nails fun colors she liked. He really had a knick for this parenting thing unlike Logan.

"That, I don't know." Logan looked outside too, all of a sudden unable to look at the orange lenses of the sunglasses. Pierce had a couple of the same pair stashes all over because he hated losing them, so no wonder Laura decided to nick one.

"Do you think he'll come back at all?" Laura muttered, pulling her knees up to her chest. "Maybe he got tired of us."

"I don't think so." Logan tried to reassure her, but hearing her so sad also broke his heart.

"Then maybe he's dead."

Logan didn't say anything. Maybe he was. He could very well be. Logan killed mercenaries like Donald without a thought in packs before. The fact that he didn't end up killing Donald when they first met in itself was a miracle but Donald and his kind knew the work they were getting themselves into paid so well because they could die any day easily. Maybe someone like Logan, or some rival gang took it upon themselves to off Donald who was in their way, an everyday occurrence on the job for them and Donald's current employer couldn't be fucked to send a message to his pet soldiers' families that hey, you just lost the love of your life and the closest thing your child has to a parent besides you, you, who is an utter shit at parenting on your own. Donald could be lying in bits in a warehouse, his blood already dry on the concrete and if his boss is gracious enough he'll have his and his coworkers' bodies scraped up and thrown in the river, if not blow the whole place up to give them an unmarked mass grave.

Meanwhile Logan is left here in fucking agony watching their daughter try to hide her tears behind Pierce's sunglasses and seem strong when the family she thought she could have after a nightmare of a childhood got ripped away from her and stomped upon.

"He could be." Logan finally said, clearing his throat to not seem too choked up about it, and Laura turned to him, looking fucking furious.

"How could you say that?!"

Logan didn't expect the outrage at all, "What? You said it first, I just said he could be-,"

"No! You should say he's not and that he'll come home!"

"That's only in those fucking cheesy movies-," Logan tried to wave her off but that just angered her more.

"No it isn't! If you love someone you should have hope! You should have hope he's alive and that he comes back! You should be telling me it's okay and everything will be okay!" She lost her battle with trying to hold her tears back as she slammed her hands on the table but Logan himself was too fucking heartbroken as well not to yell back.

"But I can't fucking tell you that because I don't think that! I could fucking lie if that's what you want but the reality is he could be gutted in some ditch never to be heard of again by now! And no amount of love will make me think everything will be fine because that's not how the world works!"

Laura stood up and screamed profanities at him in Spanish that Logan had only a vague idea of what they could mean before she took her notebook and bag and stormed out of the diner. Logan tried to shout after her, but she was gone. Better that way. Logan truly didn't know how he could've remedy the situation. He slumped down back into his booth just as his plate of food arrived, which he asked the waitress to wrap up together with the rest of Laura's food for take away. He didn't have the stomach to eat lunch and ended up eating it instead for dinner, leaving Laura's portion at her door that night, because she refused to come out and talk to him.

Logan didn't drink that night, just took Donald's hoodie out of the closet, the one he slept in when he wasn't naked, and he burrowed his face in it, inhaling the familiar scent as he laid in the bed that felt too big and empty now. Usually he was grumbling about Pierce hogging up all the space and how they needed a bigger bed but not now. Now he sniffed at the collar of the hoodie and wished for Pierce's body wrapped around his, cuddling close with his warm breath against his lips and his eyes sleepily blinking up at him as he grinned and said something coy. He faintly realized that he hasn't gotten off since the last morning that he saw Donald.

That day Pierce woke him with his warm wet mouth around his cock, sucking slowly, his head bobbing beneath the blanket, taking his time to lick and suck on his balls too and humm as he deepthroated Logan's thick shaft, nuzzling against his crotch. Logan pet his hair sleepily before turning over, to fuck Pierce's skull into the mattress the way he liked, humping his face shallowly because Pierce could take a throat-fucking so well. He spilled down his throat when he should've pulled out and fucked Donald's tight ass until he was unable to fucking walk, not just dump a load into his mouth like a lazy pig that could only enjoy a blowjob but was too tired to ruin his partner's sweet spot. He shouldn't have bothered showering, he should've been bending Donald over the kitchen counter and rutting into that sweet fucking cunt of his, making him cry out and cum over and over again, have him scratch the wooden surface to shreds. Instead of going to work he should've been eating Donald out until he was a sopping wet fucking mess, whining for his cock, and then he should've sucked on his perfect fucking tits until they were fucking bloodshot and unbearably tender. Then he'd have fucked him against the wall so hard, in thar brutal savage pace Donald likes and he'd have played along with Donald's fucking daddy kink and asked him if he likes daddy's cock deep in his little womb breeding him up? Then after sex, when they'd be sharing a cigar while still naked and sticky, he would have asked if Donald wants more kids? If they should get married and adopt another one or two they could raise as their own? If Donald could be a stay at home parent or just find a less dangerous fucking job so Logan wouldn't be worrying about him so fucking much.

That's what he would've done if he knew he wouldn't be seeing Donald again if he doesn't play his cards right.

Because here he was now, ruining his own orgasm that he built up with his coarse hand, which he no longer had a taste for and he just groaned into the hoodie that he wrapped around Donald's pillow so he could hold it through the night: utterly miserable.

Laura said that if you love someone you should have hope. He didn't know how Laura knew that Logan loved Donald even before he himself knew that, but as he dozed off, he found himself chuckling bitterly at that sentence and his last thought was hoping that Donald comes through the door that night and cuddles him to sleep like he used to do.

Seventh morning without Donald he found himself strangely calm. Like he made peace with his situation. Or he just got tired fighting it and resigned himself to losing with dignity. He played one of Donald's old country songs he loved so much and he hummed along it while he made himself coffee and poured Laura cereal, and on a second thought, himself as well. When Laura, who came downstairs determined to not speak to him and remain angry, stared at him in disbelief, he just shrugged.

"Don't tell him I like this sugary shit when he comes back. He'll start putting me on a fucking diet."

"He won't come back." She muttered, but Logan just shook his head and looked at her reassuringly.

"You don't know that. He could be coming back today."

"How do you know that?'

"I don't." Logan lifted his bowl and downed the rest of his cereal how Donald would with his sweet porridges that drove Logan insane before. When he was done he looked back to Laura who didn't miss the source of the habit. "But that doesn't stop me from hoping."

The stars that appeared in Laura's eyes were priceless, truly. She bit her lip and didn't say anything, but when they walked through the door towards the car she took his hand like a child and Logan squeezed it. They weren't good at words, the two of them, but they could still tell each other what they mean without it. In the car, Logan played the rest of Donald's country Playlist, and Laura wore his sunglasses openly through the ride before they arrived to her school.

"Bye, dad. Love you." She said quickly as she closed the door and rushed off before Logan could fully comprehend it, but then he was late for work twenty minutes trying to comprehend it without crying on the side of the road.

At work he engaged in conversation one of his coworkers, which surprised everybody, and asked him about easy to make home-cooked recipes. He made a list and went to the store after, and worked hard but patiently on that cheesy broccoli pasta. He may had to redo it twice, but he didn't give up. It paid off in the end by the look on Laura's face. She had seconds.

"Alright, I'm gonna put the rest away for if he showes up tonight, if not, you can take it for lunch tomorrow, deal?" Logan asked nonchalantly, and Laura nodded with a hopeful smile.

They sat down and watched an old western movie, one of Donald's favorites after dinner, something they haven't done in a week now, and Logan watched with a small smile a Laura's yawns turned bigger and more frequent until she completely dozed off leaning against his side. He gently scooped her up and off the couch after turning the TV off, and took her to her bedroom where he tucked her into bed gently. He kissed her little forehead and whispered a "Goodnight, kiddo," before he turned to leave, but stopped as an insistent hand tugged on his sleeve.

"You'll wake me up if mommy gets home, right?" Laura asked with a sleepy kitten yawn, looking adorably soft. "Promise me."

"I promise. Sleep now, love." He didn't question why Pierce was now mommy in her mind but he didn't think he'd mind.

"Okay, goodnight, daddy." Laura closed her eyes, and Logan swallowed thickly; he didn't know if his heart could take being called dad by his daughter twice the same day when she has never done it before. Nor did she call Pierce mommy or anything like it before.

"Goodnight, Laura." He whispered before planting another little kiss on her forehead, getting up slowly and shutting the door quietly as he left.

He wiped at his wet eyes as he went downstairs to wash up, a smile still stuck on his face, and he thought about how he should learn how to make Laura some pancakes just as the front door opened.

It felt so surreal now, seeing Pierce walk through the door, like it was a dream come to life. Logan was stuck standing there like he just saw a fucking ghost as Pierce tiredly shrugged down his bag and coat; he looked like he's truly been through it; his one whole arm was in a cast in a sling wrapped around his neck, his trousers and shirt weren't ones he's ever worn before and were probably bought recently but they were still caked in dirt and blood. His prosthetic hand was missing two fingers and his hair looked damp with sweat, matted with even more blood. He had bandages around his neck and shoulder with a dark purple bruise fading around his right cheekbone and his split lip bled as he grinned wide at the sight of Logan. He was still so beautiful.

"Honey, I'm home. Did you miss me?"

Instead of answering, Logan found himself crossing the distance to the door in record speed and pressing Donald's sore and broken body against it forcefully, not caring about the soft gasp of pain leaving his lips because he was crashing his own against them immediately. It was always Donald who was desperate before, not to say he wasn't now, but Logan could easily outmatch him at the moment, kissing him like he was trying to devour him alive, wrapping his hands around him until Donald cried out in pain.

"Fuck, I have a couple fractures ribs, go easy on me, big guy."

"You're never leaving ever again." Logan growled against his mouth, keeping Donald's jaw in his hand to make him focus. "I don't give a fuck what your boss says, I don't give a fuck how much money he offers. You're never leaving my sight again-"

"I can't even go to the store? Or the bathroom?" Donald's chuckle was cut short by Logan's glare. "Alright, okay, alright, I'm not gonna leave, I promise. This was just... a major shitshow, okay? I didn't expect to be gone this long at all. I've already packed my boys up and told them we quit. My unit is going where I'm going. This shit we've been through, I'm telling you-,"

"You can tell me later." Logan took Pierce by the hand, dragging him through the living room and up the stairs.

"Right, I need a shower, good call-,"

"No, you need to say hi to our daughter first."

"Our... daughter?" Donald stopped in his tracks just as they reached Laura's door, his eyes so big and shocked by Logan's words. One of them was bloodshot.

"She asked me to wake her up when mommy arrives back home. She made me promise." Logan watched as Pierce's eyes softened and welled up with warm tears, his laugh sounding like diamonds as he sobbed into it. Logan pulled him close by the back of his neck, planting a kiss to his temple before looking him in the eye, "She missed you a lot. I missed you a lot."

"Careful, I'll think you're in love with me or something," Pierce's smile was so fucking bright Logan had to kiss it again. And again.

"Think later, say hi to Laura now, you dumb cunt."

Pierce giggled and kissed back before opening the door. His "Hi, baby," was so soft and sweet, Laura only sighed at it first, turning in her sleep until Donald sat down on the edge of her bed and gently cooed her awake with light pecks to her cheek. "Laura, sweetheart. Mommy's home."

Laura finally blinked her eyes open and when she caught sight of Pierce she threw her arms around him immediately, squeezing him hard, but Donald only laughed, even if in pain.

Maybe if he was a better father, Logan would've told Laura to go back to sleep, it was late after all but instead he let her drag the both of them down by their hands to show Pierce "the delicious dinner daddy made" which made Donald fucking squeal and look at him with fucking heart eyes.

Laura forced Donald to eat the portion they left for him while she talked about their week without him, and Donald had to admit that was some good food. She was like a completely new child, you couldn't stop her from talking your ear off until she broke off in yawns again, sleepiness finding her once more, and she held onto Logan's and Donald's hands again as this time they were the ones guiding her back to bed.

"You're not gonna leave again, right?" Laura yawned once she was tucked into bed once more.

"No, baby, I won't. I promise." He wiggled his robotic hand's remaining digits. "I'd make it a pinky one, but some son of a gun crushed it. But I'll be busy staying at home and getting better and then I'll make a new one and then I'll make it into a pinky promise, okay?"

"Mhm, okay," Laura closed her eyes as Donald kissed her forehead and whispered, "goodnight, mommy. Love you."

"Love you too, babygirl." Donald's voice broke adorably and he sniffed back some tears before they could erupt as he made his way to the door.

Logan couldn't stop smiling at him even as Donald rolled his eyes at his smug expression, and bid Laura goodnight again before closing the door behind themselves.

"Fucking hell." Pierce whispered to himself before chuckling and dropping his forehead on Logan's shoulder. "We're parents."

"Yep." Logan chuckled back, rubbing his hands over Donald's back and kissing his neck.

"Never would've thought... but... it's nice. Real nice."

"It is."

"You like it too?" Donald peered up at him with a tired but hopeful smile. "This arrangement?"

"Yeah, I think I do." Logan smirked as he added, "For a while. Maybe longer, if I do."

"You remembered that one?" Donald laughed with big eyes and snuggled further into Logan's embrace.

"How could I forget that country shit you play daily?" Logan teased, dragging Donald along to their bedroom without breaking their embrace, stepping together like fucking penguins and it made Pierce giggle. "Besides, Laura wanted me to play it a couple times while you were gone."

"Aww, my baby got my good taste," Pierce grinned up at Logan as he shoved him gently down on the bed so he could help him undress. He really let himself become a pillow princess out of exhaustion, barely moving on his own as Logan removed his clothes.

"So it's over?" Logan asked after a minute of comfortable silence as he peeled Donald's undershirt off of him.

"Yeah. Done deal. The bag? Filled it up with a bit of extra cash I borrowed for my troubles. They won't come looking for it, trust me. I made sure," Donald had that smile on that told him he probably killed most if not all of his bosses. He sighed as Logan started taking his trousers off and leaned back to raise his hips. His torso was littered with red and purple bruises. "It wasn't a good one. The company and the job. I lost one too many good men. Besides, it'll be a pain in the ass to repair my arm without use of the other so I need to find a good mechanic. Fucking animal tried to crush it to bits."

"I'll help. Just tell me what to do." Logan hummed as he threw Donald's clothes in the laundry basket. He frowned as he realized something. "No underwear?"

"It's a bit more complicated than repairing a car, Logan." Pierce massaged his nosebridge, wincing at the cut on it.

"Can't be harder than your fucking five star pasta bake. Come on. Just tell me what to do and let me help." Logan walked back to the bed, watching Pierce's beautiful body beneath him and thumbed at the bruises on his thighs. They had a sort of fingerprint quality to them. "Where did your underwear go?"

Donald snorted, "Don't know if you noticed, but most of the clothes I left in are gone. Got fucking ruined. I got the new ones at a gas station. Long story."

Logan quirked an eyebrow and fit his hands on the marks, spreading Donald's thighs and making him wince as he lifted his hips.

"Love the enthusiasm, honey, but I do need a shower first." Pierce bit his lip and caught Logan's hand before it could reach his ass. "Let me clean up, okay?"

"Did someone fuck you?" Logan asked bluntly, and everything was still for a minute.

Donald swallowed heavily before managing a weak chuckle. "My boss wasn't very happy when he heard I have a hubby and kid at home that I want to return to."

Logan's jaw clenched at the implication and he placed Donald's hips back down, leaning over him to kiss his face all over while growing, "I'll fucking tear him to pieces, I'll fucking rip him to shreds-,"

"It's okay, hon, I took care of it, okay? Most of them anyway. Left some for you to have fun with, though, because I'm such a good wife." Pierce cooed, raining his own kisses onto Logan, sighing into their embrace. "I'm just a bit sore now, so we gotta put that fun on hold for a minute, yeah? I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. Those fuckers do though. I'll hunt down every last one of them." Logan growled into their kiss, and Donald wrapped his legs around him, purring.

"Such a good hubby you are, you know that? Makes me think you might actually love me, or something," Pierce chuckled, but Logan could hear the hope in his voice.

"Well. I did keep hope that you'd come back and I could tell you all the things I still wanted to do with you." Logan gave a small smile and Donald nudged him with a bratty impatient whine.

"Like what, like what?"

Logan got back up cheekily and headed to the joined bathroom as he called back, "I'll tell you tomorrow, let's get you cleaned up first."

"Tomorrow?! Come on, I almost died several times, Wolvie!"

Logan came back with a warm wet towel and a bar of soap and shrugged, "But you'll be here tomorrow, so it can wait until then. You'll be here, won't you?"

Pierce pouted as Logan begun cleaning him gently, "I won't be able to sleep if you don't tell me now," he said that but he yawned bigger and bigger as Logan rubbed his aching body.

"I wouldn't trust that." Logan hummed as he cleaned finally between Donald's thighs, careful not to hurt him too much as he dipped in and Pierce bit his lip.

"Can you at least give me a hint?"

"It's about our future." Logan took Pierce by the legs and pulled his body closer, so his butt was right at the edge of the bed. Logan kneeled down in front of it and said, "This was also something I wanted to do to you."

Pierce didn't get the chance to ask what because Logan's tongue found its way into Donald's sweet tight hole he loved so much. Pierce was whining and gasping and trying to claw at his hair with his metal hand as Logan ate him out, slow and deep and sloppy, the way he knew Pierce would go insane from and get a beard burn. He made him cum like that, in a fairly short amount of time. He remembered just how Donald liked it, where his sweet spot was, and he licked his cum up from his belly and fed it to Pierce in a filthy kiss.

"Your turn, your turn-," Donald whispered coyly as he licked the remainder off his tongue, "I'll suck it, let me-,"

"You're tired, you need to get some rest," Logan tried to chide him, but Donald nipped at his jaw.

"What I need is my husband's big fucking cock in my mouth," Donald whined, licking at the shell of Logan's ear. "I've been craving to suck you off all fucking week. Craved you in my ass too, but those bastards ripped me up too bad for that now. Give me this at least."

"You want it? You want me to be your husband? Want me to marry you?" Logan moaned and grinded his erection against Donald's hip, still confined in his boxers, chuckling at Donald's eager nodding. "You wanna marry me, baby?"

"Yes, please," Donald gasped into their wet kiss, tugging on his lower lip with his teeth and groaning, "I wanna be your wife so bad, wanna be yours, all yours, daddy."

"Yeah? You are," Logan hastily kicked off his underwear and straddled Donald's chest, feeding him his cock. He kept Donald to a moderate pace by his hair, the slutty little thing not minding his injuries and trying to throat him down all the way. He pet his face with his other hand and Donald looked up at him with those beautiful eyes of his and those pink lips stretched around his cock, and Logan thought he was the luckiest fucking man alive. "My pretty little wife. How gorgeous you are. And all mine."

Pierce moaned his confirmation around his cock as he swallowed him deep and it didn't take long before Logan found himself on the edge of his climax, but pulled out instead of cumming down Donald's throat. He was met with a bratty whine right until he started jerking himself hastily and then Pierce opened his mouth wide, sticking his tongue out, and looking up at Logan with those fucking eyes that made Logan cum so hard. He painted Donald's darling face with it, covering him in thick plentiful ropes, the fruit of being pent up for a week, and even leaving a generous amount disposed on Pierce's pink tongue which he swallowed diligently.

"Fuck, you did miss me," Donald chuckled, licking at his lips before Logan took the towel to clean him up. "What a fat fucking load. Your right hand wasn't a good enough company? Neither the girls in town?"

"Why would I need any of those when I have a wife at home who takes care of me?" Logan leaned back down and kissed Pierce on the mouth, something he never willingly did after a blowjob and it made Donald giggle and wrap him in a tight hug.

"You mean it?" Pierce asked later in the evening, once Logan was already half asleep against his back. "The stuff about marriage?"

"Why did you think I was saying I wanted to talk about out future?" Logan sleepily grumbled and kissed Donald's nape. "Sleep now, we'll talk about it more tomorrow."

"Okay, g'night," Pierce snuggled in closer, and after a couple minutes added with a barely audible whisper. "Love you."

Logan smiled, "Love you too."

[conniejoworld]

A reckless Trump put U.S. in danger At the CIA, we were careful with national secrets. The former president wasn’t. By NANCY ROSENBERG In the 1990s, I worked as an editor for the Central Intelligence Agency, where I was tasked with ensuring that intelligence briefs, including the President’s Daily Brief, met rigorous publication standards. In orientation, I learned that often the most mundane facts are very highly classified, not because of the content, but because of the way that information was obtained. This is what is meant by “sources and methods.” For example, the fact that an adversarial world leader had pancakes for breakfast would be classified at the highest level, not because of the pancakes, but because the knowledge of that fact meant that our intelligence community had someone in the room with him as he ate. We also learned that certain locations were known to be popular targets and hangouts of foreign intelligence agents. We were told to avoid certain restaurants in the vicinity of the headquarters at Langley, where foreign agents liked to eat lunch and try to overhear conversations from nearby patrons. It is well known in the intelligence field that Mar-a-Lago has been a target for years, with members buying their way onto the property and afforded easy access to … well, you know. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to imagine adversaries sneaking into rooms and photographing what we now know are some of our country’s most valued secrets. Reports of the contents of the indictment against former President Donald Trump have made my stomach churn with the sickening realization that so many of our country’s friends and allies, as well as our own brave agents, have been compromised by the very person who should have done the most to protect them. The cavalier nature of his handling of these documents means that he either did not know, or did not care, about what that information means. For years, we watched as highly decorated military and intelligence leaders tried in vain to corral Trump. In 2017, one day after he fired FBI Director James Comey, we watched helplessly as a jovial Trump was photographed with Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov and Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak in the Oval Office. We later learned that Trump revealed code-word intelligence during that meeting that had not even been shared with our closest allies. Later meetings with Russian President Vladimir Putin, Chinese President Xi Jinping, North Korean leader Kim Jong Un and Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan were tinged with unease in the intelligence community as the president was known to play fast and loose with vital government secrets. The ease with which Trump glad-handed adversarial world leaders was alarmingly compounded by his disdain for our own military and intelligence leaders. One by one, we watched as he denigrated John McCain, John Brennan, James Comey, James Clapper, Jim Mattis — men who have honorably served our country for decades, and who sounded the alarm time and again that Trump was reckless and dangerous. For years, I have stood by helplessly and watched as people I know and love have turned a blind eye to this behavior and this set of facts. They readily accept this “flawed vessel” because of the goods he has delivered, including hundreds of federal judges and a Supreme Court they like. Pointing out Trump’s egregious flaws has seemed only to reinforce their commitment, which feels like a bizarre cult of personality with deadly consequences. Can they now hear what is being said? Can they finally understand the danger and risk to our most valuable assets? I pray that special counsel Jack Smith can lay it out in a way that can finally be heard. Dallas therapist and writer Nancy Rosenberg worked for the CIA from 1990 to 1998. She wrote this column for The Dallas Morning News.

[aramastus]

Frozen vore prompt

@luckyshotwrites thank for helping me pick the prompt and the oc to use!

Aatos Stands up from his office chair and stretches. "I should get something to eat and drink I've been at this for 4hrs now" Their Stomach agrees with him as it growls very loudly. He has a bad habit of not eating breakfast and going straight to his office to start work. He manages accounts for a few large companies so he has shorter deadlines than most. Walking out of Office blinded by the bright sun shining in tho the pulled-back red curtains. His office is always darker than the rest of the house. Eun always loves to have the house bright and sunny he will never understand it. Making way down the stairs tho the living to the kitchen the house layout it is a bit weird but that farmhouses for you. Eun is probably out in on the farm she spends most days out there. His stomach growls again. " alright alright I get it I'm hungry" Making a sandwich of ham and cheese he always eats something quick so he can get back to work. even tho he is tired of sandwiches he just deals with it Eun tells him he is such a workaholic and he needs to find a way to not be one. He just is this way and he will always be. " hm I wonder if Eun took food with her. Searching his pockets to find his phone starts to call her. goes straight to voice mail "Huh maybe she let it die again…she bad at that" Shaking his head opening up the Freezer grabs a tray of ice and sighs "How did you even. you know what you can tell me later" Dropping 3 ice cubes into his mug. staring at on specially… Eun was frozen inside the ice cubes. he could still hear her heart beat so she was still alive. Taking his mug of tea and Sandwich back up to his office. Lifting the mug to his mouth his snake-like tongue dips in the cold liquid warping around the ice cube with a small blacked hair woman inside it. Pulling it into his mouth and tossing it from side to side as it slowly starts to melt. Hmm, Eun did add a nice honey flavor to the ice. pushing it to the back of his throat he prepares to shallow the cube whole. Closes his eye and gulps down at the cube it is very cold which make his body shiver. Tracing the lump until it disappears past his chest. Sure he could have just unfroze her but what's fun in that? She got herself into the mess so she should be punished in some way. He goes about eating his lunch until he hears a small gasp come from his middle section. "So do you plan to tell me how you ended up in the ice tray?" He asked. Eun shivered a bit as stomach acid start to warm up her body like a hot bath. "eh….." is all he gets back. Raising brow " Eun I asked you a question" he states. Eun growls " You ate me! you could have used magic to unfreeze me!" Aatos laughs " I could have yes, but you got yourself into some kind of mess so, I thought I should punish you in some way, plus it has been a while sent I've had you inside me" Eun frowns swimming over to fleshy wall kicking it "You're such a snake!" Aatos " was that mean to insult me love? or just stating facts?" Eun " UGH you know what I mean….so how long am stuck here?" He hmmm "Don't know yet depends on what you did to get into that mess" Eun " Oh great…" worried she going be stuck her forever when he finds out what happened. Eun lets herself just float about in the acid sighing" So…. uh" she begins to tell him what happened.

Eun was out doing her normal rounds in the fields. On her way to feed the griffins humming to her. Stops looking around hearing a small roar. " did one of babies to get out of the den?" watches as a small griffin baby shape slides under the fences " shit no baby don't go in there!" damn did Aatos forget to reinforce the barrier this week. Leaping over the fence after the baby she slip and fell on her ass. " ow…."

Eun was pulled from her story "Hey what the hell??" she was almost drowned in tea as it poured in on top of her causing her to sink into acid. well, not drowned but she felt it. Aatos's voice echos in the confines of his belly "Continue" Eun grumbles and jerks as she goes back to her story.

Eun got off her butt rushing into the dark dead-like forest. " Baby come back! it's not safe in there" The gray dry grass crunches under her feet as she runs for over an hour behind the baby shadow. Finally stopping she is panting "shit I lost it.." sighed thankfully there are small glowing shrooms other wise she is not able to see anything. Not that she can see much. A small roar gets her attention she rushes down a path of black trees that looks like they are bleeding. "Baby please it's not safe here!" Chancing it for another hour before she stop "Oh shit… im lost…" Eun rubs her chin "Hmmm I think it went this way" taking a path to the left ending up right back at one of the lightish colored pounds " shit…" flopping down on a rock near by the pound looking at small neon green fish in the pound. Eun complains " Aatos is going be so pissed if i can't get home and he has come to find me" "Hello young lady~" Eun jumps up looking to the other side of the pond. a woman in a blackish cloak only showing her mouth spoke again. " did you need help?" Eun, I should not trust her don't trust her! " ye ya" Eun you idiot she thinks. " your lost right deary?" asked the woman. Eun just nods trying to see the woman's face but can not see under the hood no matter how she moves.

Woman "I'll make a deal with you give me 10 years off your life and I will send you home" Eun 10 years? if she was fully human that would be an issue but 10 is much for her "Uh sure"

Aatos sighs cutting Eun off as he can guess the rest "Get cormable in there" Taking another drink of tea then pats his stomach. Eun " Uh..fuck.."

[pbandjesse]

I made it to work! I held it together and did not cry! Almost but did not! It was a kind of hard day though. Not be sure of any of the kids or anything. I was just super tired and a little wobbly.

I I slept much better last night. Though I still had bizarre dreams. I woke up a bunch but I actually felt alright when James said goodbye. I was able to half sleep for another hour. And that was nice. And when I woke up I was alright. I was a little tired but I felt fine. I could go to work.

So I let Francine know and I got washed and dressed. I honestly was a little over dressed and to warm for a lot of today. But I felt cute. My hair actually felt normal today. So that was good. I wore my silly goose earrings. I made lunch with different leftovers. And made cereal for breakfast. I put together orange juice and frozen raspberries for myself for the day. And took some DayQuil.

I walked to the nursery and got a little overheated. And would remain that way for entirely to long. My chest hurts or just felt very full a lot today. Which was frustrating. But when the medicine was working it was working and I was able to be mostly on my game.

It was really nice to see the kids. When I got there I rolled up to the class and was like. Hey mingo's. And they think that's very funny and kept repeating it. So that's what we said all day. They also liked to call me Ms taxi? Kids are goofy.

The outside times were the best parts of today. I felt the best during those times. But I did also just enjoy doing some project prep for Mr Will. And feeling useful even when I was still a bit dazed.

While outside for the first recess I worked on my embroidery. Which I like very much but was hard to focus on. There was also a new sub today! His name is John and you won't believe this but he is Stanley's grandson! What a small world! He's really nice! We sat on a bench and talked while we watched the kids. He is a CNA and is working so much! But I think he will enjoy the nursery. He also wants to take my sewing class so now I gotta tell Stanley. I love making connections.

We walked back to the school. The kids were being very silly about holding my hands. I only have two! I can't hold all of you!!! I would love to but I cannot.

Lunch was fine and getting them to Naptime was fine. They were mostly good. There was some chatting but it's not that deep. I was just really losing steam and was getting upset because I wasnt feeling good. Thankfully the second dose of medicine would kick in soon but it always upsets my belly first. Will left me with some paper to make dinosaurs and then tape out a general skeleton for them. Which was a fun little project to do.

I was thrilled to go to my break. I was really hungry. And it was a good break. I watched videos and finished up my embroidery for the day. Felt good.

After nap we had some time for play and then right outside. Where we spent the rest of the day. One little girl was having a meltdown after nap and I felt very bad. I tried to get her to calm down but it was tough. We had to call in reinforcements. But I got everyone else outside.

Where the kids put together a little birthday party for me. They made me cake and pie using mulch. And they put gifts together with different stacks of toys. And they all sang happy birthday to me!! They are so cute.

We also played soccer. And I gave them all brooms and we swept the train structure. I think the other teachers think I am strange. But I was having fun. And they were having fun. And no one got hit in the head by a broom handle.

I was glad when the day was over. The end took a while. Children were being crazy but in a fun way. They put me in jail again. We ran around. They always get confused by how I can have bursts of running energy and then can't breathe so I need a break. But they don't mind to much. I also got to introduce myself to more parents. I feel bad I won't be back until march. But it was nice to meet them still.

James came and got me. And took me home. I was very happy to be done. I was tired!!

James made us pasta for dinner. And I gave myself until 7 to be a couch potato. After that I went to the studio and worked on a more elaborate piece for tomorrow and set up another. I can't believe we're wrapping up this project!! And then it's my birthday!

Me and James laid in bed and watch videos. And eventually I took a shower. But now I'm feeling a little off again. And I'm going to take some NyQuil and go to sleep.

I am at the museum tomorrow. With a pretty easy day. And then if I am feeling up to it I may take myself birthday shopping! We will see how it goes!

I hope you all have a good night. Thank you for the good vibes. I love you!

[pashterlengkap]

A happy marriage at the DNC—coastal liberalism and prairie progressivism

This article first appeared on Mother Jones. It has been republished with the publication’s permission. If you did a word cloud diagram of the Democratic convention in Chicago, the two big words that appear would be “freedom” and “joy.” Less prominent, if it showed up at all, would be “progressive.” Yet the Democrats spent four long nights deploying the attractive concepts of freedom and joy to sell a progressive agenda to voters. Moreover, with the ticket of Kamala Harris and Tim Walz, the Ds have bolstered this pitch by marrying coastal liberalism with prairie progressivism. This union offers a powerful punch to the party’s core message: Government ought to be proactively deployed to address the problems and challenges Americans face. When Vice President Harris two weeks ago chose Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz to be her campaign partner, there was much obvious commentary that he provided from-the-heartland balance to her California lineage and that his white-guy-dad-plaid-coach persona complemented her Black-Indian-Jamaican-woman identity. What drew less attention was how Walz’s selection reinforced the ideology and values message of the ticket. He and Harris are both progressive-minded politicians, but they hail from culturally different strains of liberalism. Related Kamala Harris says Trump & GOP are “out of their minds” in closing DNC speech “Donald Trump is an unserious man,” she said, “but the consequences of putting Donald Trump back in the White House are extremely serious.” Your LGBTQ+ guide to Election 2024 Stay ahead of the 2024 Election with our newsletter that covers candidates, issues, and perspectives that matter. Subscribe to our Newsletter today Harris, more or less, represents what many folks these days think of as a liberal. She’s from the Bay Area. She’s a person of color. She talks about helping marginalized communities and seeking economic justice. She crusades for abortion rights and LGBTQ rights. Her days as a prosecutor have caused some conflict with the left. But in general she fits the familiar mode—a Big City Lib, a Blue State Lib. There’s a reason why Donald Trump and JD Vance believe they can score points by falsely branding her a crazy “communist.” Not a real American, in their view. Walz is not an easy-to-attack caricature. Nebraska-born, he’s a hunter and a former National Guard noncommissioned officer. He ice fishes. He wears flannel shirts. He could be in a truck commercial. And, yes, he coached high school football—and middle-school track and basketball—in a very red district, where he won his first election to Congress in 2006. Yet as governor, Walz has assembled an impressive progressive record. He signed into law a measure that made abortion a “fundamental right” and guaranteed access to contraception, fertility treatments, sterilization, and other reproductive health care. Having been an advocate of gay rights as a high school teacher, he signed an executive order protecting access to gender-affirming care and a “Trans Refuge” bill that banned the enforcement of arrest warrants and extradition requests for those who traveled to Minnesota for such care. He okayed a package of gun safety measures. He approved a law implementing paid family and medical leave. He legalized recreational marijuana. There’s more: He backed drivers licenses for undocumented immigrants. (Advocates, including business leaders, said it would lead to safer roads and a better state economy.) He restored voting rights for former felons. He expanded access to health insurance, took steps to reduce the cost of prescription drugs, imposed stricter regulations on pollutants, and promoted electric vehicles. He signed a measure to provide free breakfast and lunch to all public school children. This is a list that these days might be equated with Blue State politicians. Yet Walz represents a long tradition of prairie progressivism. Long before the nation’s political map ossified into Blue and Red territory, there was a vibrant… http://dlvr.it/TCMXcc

[jeaninthephilippines]

Tumaba

Today I woke up at 4am to attend my mom's 5am Sunday Zumba class. I was specifically instructed to wear black because they coordinate outfits.

My mom is already cringing at how short my shorts are and I know she has a secret plan to reinforce modesty back into my closet. While I dressed up, she preplanned wearing an inside shirt to a black dress with a built in skort for when we attend church after our workout.

We're walking down the street and I can smell poo. I wonder if it's sewage and my mom chimes in that it's the dog's poo. She says if I get it on my sneakers, she will let me sleep outside of the house. It's one of her many jokes.

We get to the covered basketball court and it's slowly filling up with very dedicated women in the area.

Everyone is taking selfies and pictures and I am giddy watching them so happy about the community and their bodies. My mom quickly introduces me as her daughter. I can see the mixed emotion in their eyes. Some of course called me tumaba but reverently. In the past, I would let those words destroy me. But in context to being here, I realized they never met a woman like me: fat, athletic, tall, and fully Filipino. Others tried to correct her for saying that by whispering, "Sexy, na."

I am proud of my growth for not being offended. But mostly I realized that all along, I was built this way to be more than the narratives pressed upon ourselves as a people.

I walked the street and into the church later in the morning with people looking at me puzzled. A little kid was in such awe that he wanted to hold my hand.

My cousin and his wife were wearing the shirts I brought them and it warmed my heart to see them love it. My Lola was fascinated by my small efforts to talk in bits of taglish today. She asked me what I ate for breakfast. Lola, taho, itlog, and mansanas.

We had lunch and then went grocery shopping. I looked at mom with her fierce generosity and knew that's who I am becoming. We enjoy redistributing our wealth if we have the means to do so. She's such a boss that while paying for the groceries at what felt like Costco, Seafood City, and Whole Foods had a baby, I could hear her mouth I wonder where those two (me and my Lola) are. We were sitting right in front of the register in a chair for senior citizens.

We didn't want to stay out too late so the rest of the family that works 6 days a week their business could get some rest. My mom and I spent the day eating a bit of our groceries and she was fascinated by my assembly of the salad. I told her I know that people look at me like I am fat, but I know who I am. I make and eat nutritious food, I workout daily, and I get enough sleep (siesta and full rem sleep).

My aunt earlier asked me in the day if I would lose weight as fast as my mom. I said I don't know because I truly don't know. She's on her journey and I am on mine.

Mine is turning the heads as a tumaba girl.

[arjun-muralidharan]

June 26th to 28th 2008 Venue: Complexe sportif Claude-Robillard Time clocked: 2:02.57 Olympic Qualifying Target Timing: 2.01.78 Location: Montreal Quebec Canada

The new Neophrene Speedo LZR racing suits were launched about a month prior to this meet and were all the buzz about how they are reducing about half a second for all the swimmers who got their hands on one. Only a selective few coaches were given these suits to help their swimmers make the Olympic cut. I asked my coach Byron Macdonald to get me one if possible. But he said it wasnt available in my size as i was a size 44 at the time. My teammate Terrence Hayes got his hands on a size 40 LZR which was his size. I asked him if i could borrow it for the 100 butterfly and he said yes. The suit took a good 45 mins to put on with the help of my brother but i knew it was too tight and difficult to breathe in but the tradeoff was worth it if it helped me make the Olympic cut. My target was to go 54.50 and qualify in the 100 itself and not leave it all to my main event which was the 200 fly. But unfortunately these suits as amazing as they were had a notorious reputation for having atrocious zips which never held together. On the blocks as the starter buzzed prepping to say "take your marks" my suits zip snapped open and my heart froze as i realised what happened. I swam the race with my entire suit filled with water way off the mark at 57.24. It was extremely disheartening and i decided to give up the idea of experimenting with any new suits and rely on my own Speed FS PRO suit for the 200 fly as that was my last chance.

100 fly results: https://www.swimrankings.net/index.php?page=meetDetail&meetId=530519&gender=1&styleId=16

Next morning woke up at 5:45 AM in my hotel room. Had a couple of bananas with energy drinks & stretched for about 30 mins preparing for the morning prelim swim. I had strategised to win the event and secure an Olympic QT i will need to secure a top 3 position in the prelims. My target was to swim 2:08 in the heats trusting that my conditioning and recovery rate helps me get ready & push through to 2:01 in the finals later in the day. Was about an hour's drive to the pool from our hotel as Montreal traffic jams are quite hectic. All through the journey had my ipod on listening to my usual rap tracks to be in the zone and suppress the butterflies in my stomach. Reached the pool and got in for the warmup. The water felt extremely light and muscles were feeling loose and fluid. This reinforced my confidence by a huge margin.

The race started out i was in the first heat. TIM RUSE of Pointe-Claire Swim Club and KISHIDA Masayuki of Japan took the lead early into the race with me comfortably in the third place. I decided to swim conserving energy i increased my stroke rate and pace around 150 meters pulling ahead of Tim RUSE and qualifying 5th for the finals swimming 2:09. Went back to the hotel had a big breakfast and a quick nap. However our swim coaches wouldnt give us a seperate room like the first two days and asked us to move and adjust with 7 other swimmers in one bed. Unfortunately some of the swimmers were given seperate rooms for their events. I knew i had a lot riding on this race to qualify for Beijing Olympics and i couldnt afford to let lack of rest and comfort come in the way of my performance. So i had to fight with other swimmers who didnt have events and ask them to move so i can get a bed to take a nap on prior to the finals. My older brother Amar who was after the same goal had swam in the morning and qualified third for the finals clocking 2:09. He couldnt get a proper place to sleep thanks to all the money saving going on by the club into clustering up swimmers so they dont have to pay for rooms. I was willing to pay more for my own room but the management and coaches refused to accomodate this request. My brother went out to Harvey's & Tim Horton's and got us both lunch which consisted of a few gatorade drinks and chicken burgers.

At about 3:00 PM we checked out of the hotel and went with all our luggage to the pool for the finals. I warmed up surprisingly feeling good but the water felt slightly cold which didnt matter much to me. I knew i am going to swim fast during the warm up but the question was how fast will it be and will it be enough? I meditated a bit after the warmup in solitude praying to the god of strength, visualizing my race and started suiting up in my FS PRO which was an old / outdated suit at the time but i trusted it'll get the job done.

As me and my brother walked out for the finals we suddenly saw the on deck commentator getting the crowd going on the last day. There were about 15000 people in attendance that broke out into a mexican wave. It was a sight to see and got me pumped up to swim the race fast. 10 mins after we were in the marshalling room getting ready to walk out to the blocks when the commentator announced the names of the swimmers walking out one by one. As our names were called out the announcer asked the crowd to give a big round of applause for us for coming all the way from India and racing in Canada. 5000 large crowd stood up and clapped for us making me feel honored and proud. It was a very unforgettable and special moment for us in our lives.

The race started with me opening out in the blistering 56.83 taking the lead. As i made the turn for the third 50 i saw the Toronto Swim Club team standing near my lane and screaming for me to bring it home. In the last lap at the 175 meters mark my hands turned to concrete but i knew it was a do or die situation. I said screw it and went 20 meters head down swim with my lungs nearing explosion but i wouldnt relent till i touched the wall, when i finally hit the last stroke i knew i left whatever i had and gave it my all regardless of the outcome. I turned around and saw that i missed the Olympic qualifying mark by .70 of a second. However i had broken the Canada Cup record and become the first and only Indian swimmer to win a gold at a foreign national championship. It was a mixed emotion of feeling you accomplised something but sad that you lost something at the same time. All my coaches, training partners came and gave me a pat, handshakes and three cheers along with the crowd as well. After coming out of the pool all i could do is take a bow and acknowledge the great people who were showing appreciation.

I had a long and heartfelt call with my dad and mentor who was back home watching the race live. He said "The only thing that matters is that you gave it your best and made your parents and country proud" In the end that is the main thing.

200 fly results: https://www.swimrankings.net/index.php?page=meetDetail&meetId=530519&gender=1&styleId=17

All in all it was a great experience and something i cherish to this day. Winning and Losing is all a part of the sport. What matters is what you take from it and how you grow thereafter. These are the experiences we impart onto our students who will be the champions of tommorrow.