#HEHDHSH...

[aruanism]

The Ocean Blue and Bloodied Hands

1.0k words | ooc, self indulgent aruani ff :33

(I'm not fluent in English T.T + I'm still taking creative writing classes)

Since when did you start looking at me that way, with your pretty sapphires and ever-so-curious gaze?

Because I'm a monster—a mass murderer with blood on her hands. I was trained to kill; I murdered countless people for the sake of missions. Yet, you still stood by me. When our gear was inspected that one day, you called me a nice person. Why? During an expedition, I was trampling comrades without hesitation. And you, you looked so scared under my gaze. I knew you'd figure me out soon enough after that, dearest. Yet when you did, you kept my secret for a whole month. Although I'm wounded, my dear. You gained my trust and betrayed me afterward.

Though I'm glad I could be a good person even just for a while. At least for you.

I was trapped in a crystal with my thoughts for four long years due to your betrayal. And yet, you still talked to me—looking up at my still form with your pretty blues, as if I would reply. I stood there, my eyes closed, still encased, wishing I could; could see the look on your face as you talked about your explorations or the way your eyes sparkled with each word spoken from those precious lips I wanted to kiss so badly. And when you said you understood me, do you really? I can only hope that I'm still a good person to you.

While countless colossal titans trampled over millions of people, it was also the first time we talked to each other properly, uninterrupted. The ship’s engine roared beneath our feet, the ocean’s waves humming its continuous rhythm. I pressed my knees close to my chest before patting the space beside me. Please, I need you. Awkward silence and unsaid feelings lingered between us until I remembered I had to thank you.

“I realized…that I hadn’t said thank you yet.”

“Huh?” Is that all you have to say?

“For coming to talk to me over all those years. Thank you.”

“Oh.” I missed you, more than I’ll ever express.

In truth, I was so lonely. I thought I was going to lose my mind. Four damned years of being hardened, I could see nothing while my thoughts were louder than ever. I had to look forward to hearing you and Hitch’s voice, just to remind me that I was alive and breathing. Even if those stories were as stupid as Hitch talking about her bad taste in men, it gave me a sense of normalcy that I yearned for. I remembered the story you told me—that day you visited the beach. You told me that you even found a beautiful conch, though I bet it's as beautiful as its beholder. I may not see the wonder in your eyes when you told me your experiences, but I can see it so clearly now, in those deep blues that I fell for since the beginning. How I wish I was there to hold your hand, gaze into your eyes, and...and...

"Oh, Annie." Hearing my name on your lips…sounds so right.

“Tell me why?” I need to know something.

“Why bother talking to a rock that couldn’t so much as grunt a response back?”

“Huh?” Give me a response, please.

“I mean…There must’ve been girls out there more fun and cheerful than me, right…?”

It’s true. There are girls out there more deserving of your attention than I am. Some girls might even give you the world if you asked them to. Of all the women in that island, you chose the terrible Female Titan under the name of Annie Leonhardt, whose presence is but a living nightmare. She's a traitor, a bloodstained Marleyan warrior candidate, a horrible being who deserves—

“Annie, I did it because... because...I—” I want to….no. I need to know.

“...I missed you.” What?

Three words, three syllables. A combination of words I never thought I’d hear in my whole life, spoken from the lips of the man I hold so dearly to my heart—Armin Arlert. Suddenly, the hardened warrior I was crumbled to a million pieces. I felt so vulnerable, so real, so human. My cheeks reddened as the unfamiliar yet felt-so-right feeling of being oh-so-loved spread through my chest. I never felt this way, not in my 20 years of living in this God-forsaken world.

“...Why?” The only thing that came out of my dried lips.

“Huh? Do you really not get it?” I don’t, Armin.

“Even after Hitch teased me so much?” Yes.

“...I don’t. ” I’m being honest.

Because for years, Armin was talking to me, an enemy. He’s a good person compared to myself. He was willing to visit me, knowing I might wake up at any moment to strike once more. When I stood to stop the conversation, he held my hand. Those hands that belong to the man I've felt human with for years...

“Sit back down.” Alright.

Squeezing my hand even tighter, I sat back down with him avoiding his gaze. He's holding my hand so tenderly, the same hand possessing the ring behind multiple people's lives lost. Besides, why should I stay? I already said what needs to be said. I had thanked him for being there. What's more to be talked about?

“And I know I’ve told you this before.”

“But I’ve decided I really don’t like being called a good person.” Huh?

“I’ve killed a lot of people. Not just soldiers. Regular people, children…” So have I.

“I’ve killed comrades…” I know.

“I’ve been a terrible monster myself for a long time.” Then let’s be terrible monsters together—you and me. I want to be there for you like you were for me.

Hours after our conversation on that ship, I could only wave goodbye as you rode the flying boat with the others. I decided I wouldn’t fight anymore. To spend the final moments of my life in peace…with you. Even if this is a selfish dream, I want to enjoy every year of my life with you, not worrying about anyone else. I could look into your eyes every morning and run my fingers through those golden hair strands on your head.

Because I love you, my dear Armin. I loved you, and I still do.

[menlove]

for vibes? I’m thinking Friday Night Gurus by Studio Killers <3 (I’m not parasocial I swear)

obi wan kenobi MENTIONED I'm thrilled w this choice

what song vibes do i/my blog give?

[starryyberries]

I haven’t used tumblr in forever HEHDHSHS

[f4ngzx]

"By my left hand you will die, And by the right you'll come alive"

^ currently obsessed with this song HEHDHSH

------

Shadow Dude belongs to @kazpng

I love this little fandude he's so meow :333

Sighs and kicks rock, I wish he was real

[flamma-nocturna]

friend and i carved pumpkins :o and this is mine!! i had fun with the creep factor hehdhshs

here it is lit up in the dark :O

[merwynpersonalhub]

HEHDHSHS

Said this on my blog but—

I had the idea for like a comic (no longer do btw since someone else already made a comic for this upon seeing the post lol—you can go check it out btw if ya want it's really fuckin awesome @honestlyspookymentality made it/lh) that's like episode 10, but while Skiddad is going on a evil monologue—John tries to grab some gun the cult stole from him, but Skiddad reaches out to stop him, and they accidentally touch hands. And then they just look at eachother with suddenly dreamy looks in their eyes as romantic piano music starts playing, and Skiddad just takes John in his arms slowly as they look at eachother, and they nearly kiss til Jack shouts John's name, and they snap out of it lmaoo /j

GVBJHVFBHJVBHJ IM CACKLING SO MUCH TFF VFBHJFVBHJVF

[crossover-enthusiast]

HEHDHSH

Considering Ario canonically likes Japan though and Japan is Italys friend, he'd probably be full on insane about it if that happened instead /j

HAHAH

Oh he'd go ALL OUT trying to set them up! like Renting out an entire restaurant just for them type of thing

[mayisgoingnuts]

HEHEHDHDH

Dude I wanna talk about Tom x Kevin scenarios rn cuz my mind is inspired by the idea of them just going places together and doing cute things hehdhshs

I imagined them jusr popping up in random places/silly

[specialgrades]

WAes lOOK

THE FUCKING. THE SQUIMBUS. THE SKWINGLE. THE SKRUNKLY. THE SQUIMBAP. (from the jjk expo hehdhshs)

IT'S YOUR GUY!

[fizhingtrawl]

rick hc's? I love your head canons also just know you are awesome! >:D have a good night or day!!- skedaddles

HEHDHSH— THANK YOU???

Ok ok-

Rick is Roy’s older brother, he often ends up babysitting him or sometimes Roy stays with him when the kid doesn’t want to be around Carmen.

Speaking of that, Carmen disowned him. Why? I can’t tell you. Rick assumed it’s because he’s a disappointment.

Rick Has a cat he picked up off the street.

His Full name is Richard Junior, Sense his father is Richard.

He’s around 37Yrs old.

Rick is a job hopper, obviously. But he prefers the night shifts over the day shifts.

He technically he has demon blood, like Roy and the comedian, but the traits missed him.

Once, He had to fight off zombies where he worked. He quit the next day.

He’s a werewolf, he was born this way! Which is conflicting because of his demon blood, Huh?

He’s transmasculine

And he’s also autistic

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

the way seth and gabriel confirm alt jonah is the real jonah is ask him about a type of bug

seth: hey, what do you know about giant hornets

jonah: *goes on long happy rant about how cool they are*

seth: yeah thats him

HEHDHSH

[menlove]

Pls fill in aye mclennon girlie I’m lost 😭

HEHDHSHS wrt this

paul & john apparently had a shared dream which involved finding treasure

[pandorxxx]

BABE YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, STUNNING. AND YOUR VOICE SOUNDS LIKE AN ANGELLLL. I SWEAR THAT'S THE VOICE I HEAR IN MY DREAMSSS 🫶🫶🫶 YOU'VE GOT MY HEART FLOATING HEHDHSHS

🥹❤️ omgggg STOPPP!!!!

[alelathedragon]

The fucking glowflies HEHDHSHS

YOU THINK OUR SQUID EARTH IS HELL BUDDY?? THEY RISE TO CHALLENGE AND DRAG YOU BACK

I drew some of the ideas people commented on my last post

[formywifeyangel]

It says here that "I know we are young but I want you forever, I want us forever". I know we're young pa baba but i want you to know that I always want you and I will always choose you in everything, I'm not that perfect girlfriend but ik how to prove and to do anything well for you to be feel safe and comfortable, ik sometimes we argue but trust me baby that doesn't mean i don't like you na, we argue kasi part narin yan ng rs natin. And I'm happy that after we argue, nag ssorry tayo sa isa't isa it may take times of course we need to clam our self, remember baby ha, NO MATTER WHAT REALLY HAPPENED TO US, I WILL ALWAYS CHOOSE YOU. iloveyou baby ko jdhdhdhd

And, this love sorry for being ma attitude lately, I don't know why ganito ako minsan but sometimes talaga mahal may reason po, minsan kaya me ganun kasi gutom, or di kaya may bad something happen lang sakin like nakakuha ng mababang score and anything pa djhdhsd hayss, but anyways that is not an excuse po jdhdhs, I'm sorry for being like this lately mahal, I hope i didn't hurt you in that way na nagging cold ako at nagging matigas to you to the point na baka mapaiyak na kita and mafeel mo na ayaw ko na☹️☹️☹️, me really love you mahal and gustong-gusto kita kaya i hope na hindi mo maisip yung mga ganyang bagay, I promise that I will fix my attitude towards you ik you understand me but hehdhshs baby let me hmm??, I LOVE YOU ALWAYS, MAHAL KITA BABY KO.

[merwynpersonalhub]

HEHDHSH

I MEAN IM RIGHT THO ARENT I/J

/silly