#HE IS THE BEST I NEED TO NE BESIDE HIM AND RIP SOME HEADS

[7tsumurai]

Hi guys gm/gn <3 just woke up and I LOVE YOU ALL SM :3 I saw Childe in my dream I CAN'T STOP SMILING

[unhealthyfanobsession]

Do you think you’ll continue with the lawyer Nessian fic. It was so amazingly written I’d love to read more! I love all your writing anyways I’ll be happy with anything❤️

Ok not *technically* a Drabble request BUT I’m not ready to commit to a full lawyer AU that happens in order however I did just drum up a part 2 that we’ll say is several years before the previous lawyer AU. Nessian teasing in a bar and Rhys being a dumbass.

FYI the lawyer Drabble I’m talking about can be found HERE.

“I’m in love,” Rhys slurred. Cassian, a decent bit bigger than his brother and two drinks behind him, had a gentle buzz so he could only surmise that his brother was well passed sober.

“Congratulations,” Cassian grinned, clapping his hand on Rhys’ shoulder. “May I lay eyes upon the future Mrs. Dumbass.”

Rhys stared at him flatly. Blew a laugh out of his nose. “She’s not marrying you, brother.”

Cassian snorted, casting his eyes around the elegantly decorated little lounge they’d stepped into for the night. Lounge, not bar. Because they were mature adults now looking to take the edge off after a long day of work, not college students looking to get fucked up.

It was different.

It was different because the cocktails cost $20 and were served in actual stemware instead of red solo cups. They were evolving. Growing. Cassian was a lawyer now and Rhys was supposed to be doing actual work for his dad’s company so… no more dive bars.

Now they frequented little lounges where accountants and lawyers and bankers sat in tailored suits and discussed… adult things.

It was all very civilized.

And yet here was his brother. Every bit the horny college student they were trying not to be. Oh well, old dogs and all that.

“End of the bar.” Rhys jerked his head to the left and Cassian grinned.

“Might be a little old for you, champ.”

Rhys wrinkled his brow and turned to look at the grandmother doing a crossword puzzle on the far left side of the bar. A martini glass in front of her. Good for grandma.

“Other end of the bar!”

Cassian smirked. He didn’t need to turn his head, since he’s noticed her the second she walked in, but he still did. Just so he could look some more.

“Ah, you mean the deliciously dishevelled leggy brunette with her suit jacket on the chair beside her who just ripped the pins out of her hair like they personally offended her and then laid them in a neat little pile beside her Kobo?

“Mmm,” Rhys grinned, “I’d like her to rip those fingers through my hair.”

Cassian rolled his eyes. “Go for it, brother.”

Rhys grinned wider. “I think I will.” He straightened up, ran a hair through his artfully mussed hair, and pulled on the lapels of his Gucci suit jacket until they were even again.

Cassian snickered into his Old Fashioned. Rhys could straighten his jacket all he wanted. He could pretend he wasn’t drunk all he wanted. It wouldn’t matter one bit.

Not with Nesta Archeron.

Nesta Archeron who hated men that stunk of trust funds and privilege more than anything else in this world.

This would be fun to watch.

Watch her try to ignore him at first. Eyes glued to the page of her book, hand reaching up to wave through the air like Rhys was an annoying fly she could swat away.

Rhys, to his credit, was a clever little bastard. He asked the bartender for a refill of her drink and set it down in front of her then sat himself one stool down from her.

He didn’t move her jacket to sit next to her, which would have had her going feral. He just sat there, waiting.

After a few moments Nesta let out an exacerbated sigh that Cassian could hear from across the room. There was his girl.

Well, not his girl. Not even a little bit his girl, but… someday.

Cassian decided that he was going to Marry Nesta Archeron the first time she kicked his ass up and down a negotiation meeting. It was a couple years ago now. He’d been young and new at his firm. She was young and new too, but the words learning curve were not in Nesta’s vocabulary. Everything she did, she did with perfection.

Including getting rid of men she didn’t want hitting on her.

She said something to his brother that made Rhys’ half drunk, cocky, smile fall halfway down his face.

Cassian would’ve given his left eye to know what she said in that moment. She had a knack for jumping at the jugular and Rhys… oh Rhys. So obvious.

After a few moments and the continual fall of Rhys’ face, Cassian decided it was time to intervene. He knocked his drink back and straightened out his own suit jacket. Armani, still overpriced and designer but not so obvious or try hard as Mr. Up On The Trends with his Gucci. Nesta appreciated classics.

Simple. Clean lines, solid colours, classic. Which was why it was so fun just how attracted she was to his half wild self.

Unlike Rhys, Cassian plucked Nesta’s light grey suit jacket up off the stool beside her and reached over her head to hang it on a coat hook at the end of the bar. Settling himself into the chair beside her like it was exactly where he belonged. Which it was.

She turned around with an indignant shriek and a fire-breathing snarl that narrowed into just a hard glare when she realized it was him. Touching.

“This guy giving you trouble, Nes?”

Rhys choked on his whiskey and Cassian fought his hardest to keep a straight face.

“I so don’t need your saviour complex right now, Cassian.” Nesta scoffed.

“No,” Rhys rolled his eyes. “She was doing perfectly well scaring off everyone in a 10 mile radius all on her own.”

Nesta smiled sweetly, “I was just playing your game.”

Rhys sputtered again. Looked up at his brother. “This devil woman that you apparently already know,” he glared, “is all yours. I’m going home.”

“Be sure to drink plenty of water!” Nesta sing songed after him. Rhys flipped them both off on his way out.

“What’d you say to him?”

Nesta smiled. A pretty, feline little thing. “He said he wanted to chat. Suggested 20 question, which is the lamest, oldest, crustiest line in the book. So I went first. Asked just how small his dick was that he felt the need to overcompensate with the swagger and the gratuitous displays of wealth. He thought he was quite clever to use his question to ask if I wanted to check for myself how not small his dick was and then I asked if his daddy never loved him and that’s where all of that machismo masking painfully obvious and deep seeded feelings of inadequacy and insecurity came from. I was going to offer him my friend’s number before you showed up. She’s an excellent therapist.”

Cassian laughed. Hard. For a very long time. He loved Rhys, but sometimes the kid could use a nice set down. It was always sweeter when delivered by a beautiful woman. Not to mention, Cassian himself had gotten the same ice cold rejection the first time he met Nesta. When he asked if she wanted to get a coffee and she looked at him like something she’d scraped off the bottom of her shoe. That Rhys was chased off so easily just proved he couldn’t take the heat.

“You know the walking trust fund, I presume?” Nesta boredly sipped the drink Rhys had bought her. And even that was somehow amusing.

“Only for the last couple decades or so,” Cassian grinned. “He’s like a brother to me.”

“Explains a lot.”

“Your insults are more impactful when you clarify which person is being insulted.”

“I was going for the two birds one stone method.”

“In that case, consider me wounded, sweetheart.”

Nesta scoffed, “Unfortunately not mortally.”

“Oh Nesta, if I weren’t here you’d die of boredom and you know it. No one else can run you up and down the courtroom like I can.” Now. Cassian grinned as he watched the word flash across her eyes. He’d never live that first blunder down.

Nesta rose an eyebrow. “Bold of you to assume you present any challenge whatsoever.”

Cassian signalled for another drink and leaned forward. “Alright, I’ll bite. Who in this entire city can give you more of a run for your money?”

“Vanserra.” Nesta looked him dead in the eye. And managed to keep a straight face. As if that wasn’t the funniest fucking thing he’d heard all day.

“Oh yes, Nepotism and Nepotism LLP certainly has us all shaking in our boots,” Cassian blew out a breath. “What are you working on now?”

“I’m working on upholding attorney-client privilege.”

“So, the Suncurser merger.”

Nesta looked up. “How did you-”

“Helion and I are old friends. I checked the zoning on the lots he was buying before the merger went ahead to make sure the expansion was even feasible. But, as you know, M&A isn’t my thing. So I may have… given him a referral.”

“Are there any rich playboys in this city that you aren’t friends with?” Nesta finished off her drink and pointedly didn’t signal for another. “And if you think I’m going to be grateful to you for sending this my way you’ve got another thing-“

“Helion is my friend.” Cassian repeated, cutting her off. “He believes in this merger and he wants it done right. You’re the best, Nesta. Why wouldn’t I send him to you?”

“It’s not just to get in my pants?” She narrowed her eyes.

Cassian laughed again. “Oh no, sweetheart. When you invite me into your bed it will have nothing to do with work. It’ll be because you’re tired of denying how much you want me.” Cassian leaned in closer, one hand resting on the back of her chair. “Tired of denying the thrill that shoots through your whole body when we lay into each other. In the court room or out.” His nose brushed against hers, just a little, and Cassian felt Nesta tense up. He smirked, mouth just inches away from hers. “Tired of denying how right this is.”

Nesta’s voice was rough, husky. “So your plan is to wear me down?”

Cassian smirked. “My plan,” his hand came up to stroke the silk covered expanse of her upper arm, “is to marry you, Nesta Archeron. But sure, we can start with wearing you down.”

***Feyre and Nesta look physically similar so you can’t tell me drunk Rhys wouldn’t hit on Nesta in a bar before realizing he’d made a terrible mistake and running away thank you***

Also tags yourself, I’m the grandma doing the crossword puzzle with a martini. She’s an icon and she is the moment.

[kass-storycorner]

*cough* so i really love your work!! i love everything your put out so far however i’m now going to request for angst mwehehrh. Feel free to reject this if you aren’t comfortable!!

archon x albedo but they break up with him because they still haven’t moved on from their past lover that was slaughtered and felt it would be unfair if they stayed with albedo if they still loved someone else? Thankyou!!!

don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry

I'm so sorry that it took this long, I have been working a lot the past month and I've not been well mentally soooo yeah, but I'm glad I finally finished it! I was suprised myself at what I wrote, I only had to write an ending for this so ouch haha

thank you so much for your kind words I’m- ahhh I’m so happy that you love what I shared ( ˙꒳​˙ )

I’m so insecure with my writing so it’s reassuring to hear such kind words!

about the request: ooooOOOH I love this!!! And honestly my mind went directly into thousand different directions to make it even MORE angsty ahaha poor Albedo ( ╥ω╥ )

Genre: Angst, Hurt, no comfort, a bit fluff in between but it's more bittersweet

Rating: SFW

Content Warnings: mention of Khaenri`ah, mention of blood

Word count: 1,811 words

Characters: Albedo, gn!dendro Archon reader

Format: Text

Fic is under the cut!

“-and I think it is best to go separate ways from now on.” Ah, how peculiar. What is this strange feeling in Albedo’s chest? It feels like there is no air in his lungs anymore, an unsettling feeling spreading from his stomach through his whole body. Feverously he searched his mind for a reason for your words. Go separate ways? He heard what you said, but at the same time he did not understand the meaning of your words. Albedo stood there in your shared bedroom, stiff as a board his eyes pierced through you, no longer looking at you. It was as if you weren’t there.

“Albedo?”, your head peaked through the door of his office, sending him a smile. He peaked up from the work on his desk, strands of blond hair falling in front of his eyes. “Ah, (Y/N), hello,” curling his lips into a small smile at your sight. You stepped into the office, walking around the table, and leaning on it right beside him. His eyes were fixed on you. “Busy?” you asked as you brushed the strands of hair back behind his ear. A faint blush crept unto his face; you wouldn’t have noticed if it weren’t for how close you were to him. Clearing his throat he looked back down on the papers in front of him, answering your question. “Umm, well yes. The next expedition to the Dragonspine and my experiments need to be organised, though the formalities of filling out the forms for Jean is nothing that I am interested in.” He heard you chuckle at his words, wondering what was so funny about them. “I wonder”, you began, leaning down to him, so close the tips of your noses nearly were touching, “if is there something here that might interest you more.” “I supposed, there is,” he said and closed the distance between the two of you with a kiss.

“Albedo?”, your concerned voice pulled him out the pleasant memory that crossed his mind. He had been quite for a while now, it worried you. You weren’t sure how he’d take it, you asking to break off your relationship. It had been quite pleasant so far, the last few months with him. There weren’t any quarrels between the two of you nor reasons for the heartbreak Albedo felt right in this moment. You both were always honest to each other, about who and what each of you were. And because of this honesty each of you valued you had to break his heart. “I-“, his voice was hoarse, it had more emotions in it than he liked it to. “I need to ask you this… why?”. He finally looked at you, his cerulean eyes filled with pain. Ah, the dreadful question you knew he would ask, but you hoped he wouldn’t. There was no use in lying to him now, to not share the true reason for why you’re breaking up with him. Though you secretly wished that you could spare him the truth.

You sat under the shadows of a tree, eyes closed and feeling the warm summer breeze on your skin. “Please, don’t move.” At that you opened your eyes, looking at Albedo sitting across of you with his sketchbook and a pencil in his hands, sketching a portrait of you. “You quick with your hands, I doubt my small movements would change anything that you draw,” you said in a teasing tone, earning a raised brow from him, but no comment. There you were, the two of you. Sitting in the shadow, a comfortable silence surrounding the both of you. You watched the way Albedo furrowed his brows, looking up to you and then down to the paper, for him to sigh in frustration and starting a new sketch. “Somethings wrong?”, it has been the fourth piece of paper he rips out of the book and tosses aside. “I seem not to be able to capture your features correctly, something always is a bit off.” “Let me see,” you lean forward trying to grab one of the sketches he tossed away, but Albedo was quicker to snatch them away. “Don’t,” he says, hiding the pieces of paper behind his back. “Oh, come on, Bedo. I wanna see, I can’t look that bad” you joke, moving closer to him hoping to get a peak at his fifth sketch. Before you could even come close to taking a look he closed the sketchbook, denying you access to it. “No matter how often I try to draw you, it never does you justice”, he sighs, pinching the bride of his nose. You were close enough to him now to lean your head on his shoulder. “You know, it is quite the challenge to get the godly features of me right,” taking his hand, intertwining your fingers with his. “But I’m sure in all of the centuries I’ve lived through you might be the first one to succeed at it.”

You took a deep breath, dreading the answer you were going to give him. There was no way to sugar coat it and you were sure Albedo wouldn’t want to hear a long winded explanation if it wasn’t needed. Like a bandaid that needs to get ripped off you decided to do it as quickly as possible. “I don’t love you. I’m sorry, Albedo.” At your words Albedos heart was shattering into thousand small pieces. He swallowed hard, trying to suppress the tears that were trying to fall from his eyes… still, he had so many questions for you. His mind was racing, but all he could bring out was again the same question as before. “Why?”

“Albedo, please believe me when I say I wish I could. I wish I would love you, the way you deserve it. The way I want to, the way I still love them. You mean a great deal to me, please believe this. The time we spend together was time I enjoyed and that’s why I feel the need to be honest with you now. I hadn’t said anything before because I believed I could open my heart again, open it up for you. However it seems it’s impossible for me and I am so sorry for it. I shouldn’t have led you on like this…”

Blood curling screams were filling the streets of a small city that did not exist anymore. War was always present in Teyvat, there have been the past thousand years without it, but before that? The land was filled with the blood of mortals and god alike, the first ones killing each other in the names of the second ones. The reasons for most of the wars were laughable. One started them out of hurt pride, the other to broaden their territory and a third just out of sheer boredom. Not caring a bit about the humans that were caught in the crossfire of the gods. So when the Archon War began, similar to the ones before but just the scales were so different. There you were, a small deity. The god of the woods as they called you. You never liked the blood shed, it poisoned the earth so that no plant was able to grow. Before you were able to just avoid the wars, this time around you had no choice. And in the middle of this war you met someone astonishing. Until this day you couldn’t say if it was a curse or a blessing that they made their way into your life and your heart. All you know now is just the deep grief that is always there with you since they are gone. In the middle of bloodshed and darkness that the Archon War brought with it you found someone who made you forget the horrors of it, who made the burden of the crown easier when you rose to the position of the Dendro Archon after it - a position you didn't want at first, it falling into your hands by mere coincidence. After that you spend some marvelous years with that one person by your side, but even those who aren't entirely human are mortal, even gods can be killed. With another War that came, they left your side, wanting to protect you, to protect Sumeru. Brutally slaughtered by the hands of an enemy that envied your position, your power. Now all what remains of them is the dry earth. The massive woods of Sumeru turned into deserts, a consequence of your grief. And when the day came for another war, more blood and destruction at Khaenri`ah you decided to leave. To cut all ties with Celestia and give up the seat you never wanted in the first place.

Albedo knew most of this. He knew who you are, he knew of your nature before you made him fall in love with you. You never just told him about your past lover, too much did their loss still hurt and, what you were ashamed of admitting, too much did Albedo resemble them. In the silence of the shared room you finally told him what orginally drew you to him - how much you really wished you were able to love him for himself and while yes, you liked him very much, it was someone else you saw in him when you kissed. Someone else you wished he was. At first you didn't knew it yourself, in the beginning you really believed it was possible for you to find new love... but you still wished most days they were with you. It was time to be honest with him, to speak the truth, no matter how much you hurt him. "Albedo...", you began slowley, your voice drifting to him, but what sounded like a sweet melody just hours before now makes him feel sick. "Don't." he interrupted you. "I thank you for your honesty and for telling me the truth, but I don't need to hear more." With that he left the room, making his way towards his lab on Dragonspine. Not one person in Mondstadt would think of Albedo as a dumb person, everyone says how they are impressed with how smart he his... so why does he feel so stupid right now? He was a fool to believe that he was loveable, that someone saw him for who and what he was, not what they wanted him to be. For now he just wants to be alone again, surround himself with his work and ignore these feelings in his chest. The heartbreak, the betrayel... but also the feeling of relief. Albedo did wonder how much it would've pained you if he ever loses control, but now this is not a concern anymore. And still, as he made his way up Dragonspine he couldn't help the frozen tears coming spilling from his eyes.

[littlesniggy]

Hi! How are you doing? I'm the anon who asked for the underage character and yes, obv I wasn't thinking about any nsfw since he is underage ^^ So can I ask you a scenario for Dellinger x fem reader? His reaction when a stranger try to flirt with her, and she's clearly uncomfortable with the situation

Thank you, hope you're having a nice day :3

Hey Anon! Thank you so much for requesting for Dellinger. First time writing for him and I think I'm not quite sure how he'd behave just yet but it's not too shabby either. I hope you enjoy it! Dellinger is a little shit but we all know this. If you are in a relationship with him, be prepared for a lot of questionable things lol.

Warning: maybe mention of blood, mild swearing

Pairing: Dellinger x female reader

Word count: 1.6k

You two haven’t been dating for long yet and it was your very first relationship. To think it would be with someone like Dellinger surprised even you. Especially since you had no idea he would actually feel the same way about you in the first place. He was like an odd-ball: either hit or miss and luckily for you it was a total hit. It had taken all your courage to tell him how you felt; you’ve always been on good terms and had a lot for fun together, even if you not always agreed with the way he loved to torture his enemies (or even his allies).

“You like me, Y/n? Of course, you do!” he laughed and put his arm around your shoulder, looking at you with an excited yet shit eating grin. “You’re fun to hang around, too! Wanna be my girl?” and that’s how you two started dating. It’s been challenging from time to time, peculiarly when it came to other boys looking at you. You never thought of him as being the jealous type but in hindsight you could’ve presumed as much; he didn’t like to share his stuff, he got mad when he wasn’t the center of attention, let alone when he got ignored, and he loved showing his things off to others. So, it was only natural for him to be protective over you.

“Ne, Y/n! Where you going? Why aren’t you asking if I want to come with you?” you heard his voice behind you, close to your ear. You jumped a little in surprise at his words, turning around to look at his naturally hungry looking eyes and the same old grin on his lips. “I didn’t think you would want to come with me. Told you I’d go to town and look for this book I’ve wanted for a long time. Remember? Your answer when I first asked you yesterday was: “As long as it’s not book with pictures of people getting tortured or some magical book where I can summon a gigantic beast, I’m out.”. Ring any bells?” you quoted him, crossing your arms in front of your chest, grinning at the young man in front of him.

“I’ve changed my mind. Let’s go!” and with that he grabbed your hand and lead the way. Stunned, you followed your boyfriend, wondering what has gotten into him all of a sudden. But you’d get your answer sooner than later…

At the book store you had chosen to look for the wanted item were a lot of people; women, man, children, toys – it seemed like everyone from this kingdom was here today and you could barely look at any of the books, let alone move forward to the section where you assumed the book to be. Surprisingly, Dellinger didn’t complain once; he had his hands crossed behind his head and was even whistling! What was wrong with him today?

A sudden shove had you bump into some guy standing next to you. “Oh, I’m sorry.” You apologized and lifted your hands as well as a sign you didn’t mean to. “Oh, no worries. It’s not too often a pretty young lady tries to flirt with me.” He laughed and you chuckled awkwardly. “Oh, I wasn’t trying to-“

“I’m just joking. I know you it was an accident.” He winked at you. Relieved you gave him a genuine smile, apologized once more and tried to make your way over to your destination.

“That was a weird guy, right?” you mumbled. When you were given no response, you turned around and saw – no one; at least no one you knew. “Dellinger?” you called out but couldn’t make him out in the crowd. With a shrug, you moved on, assuming he’d probably gotten annoyed and was now waiting outside or doing God-knows-what.

While looking at the different book titles in hopes of finding the one you felt as if someone was looking at you intently, and it made your body shiver. An uneasy feeling became more and more present in the pits of your stomach. As a consequence, you decided to slowly turn around and be prepared to find some old creepy man eye your body.

You were relieved to see it was not an old man but your relief turned into concern when the guy watching you turned out to be the same guy from earlier. He was holding a book in his hand and acted all surprised to see you here as well, smiling at you and putting the book away. From where you stood you couldn’t get a clear look on the title but you were pretty sure he wasn’t actually reading this book.

“And here we meet again. One could think you’re following me.” He said this cheesy line and you wanted to vomit but didn’t dare to upset him. Where was Dellinger anyway? He was always over you when anyone even seemed to be interested in you in the slightest. And now, that someone was actually flirting with you, he was nowhere to be found.

“It seems more like you are following me.” You said in a polite yet distant tone. “What makes you think that?” he asked, crooking his head to the side. You pointed behind him to the book shelf where he had put the book. “Cause either, you have a baby on the way and need some last-minute advice from a book since the section over there is for parents to be or, which is much likelier, you just pretended to read it.” You said, putting the book you were holding back in its place again. Your eyes flashed over the spines of several books but it seemed like you had no luck in finding the wanted one here.

“I guess you got me.” He admitted. You turned your gaze over to him again, seeing him practically stare at you. There was a silence after this for a while and it made you feel even more uncomfortable. What did he want?

“Well, is there anything I can help you with then? Since you made all this effort to follow me?” Please say no and just leave, you thought to yourself.

“Would you go on a date with me?” he straight out asked and put you on the spot. You weren’t the best at turning people down but in all fairness, it rarely happened anyways. “I…I have a boyfriend.” You said, sounding not very convincing.

“You don’t have to lie to me. Don’t be shy, I won’t bite. Besides, ever since I first saw you, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Please, give me one chance to prove myself to you.”

Anxiety took over more and more and you stepped a step back, bringing some more distance between the two of you. “No, really. I’m in a relationship.” And what do you mean ever since you first saw me? That was five minutes ago…”

“Maybe it’s not the first time I’ve seen you. I’m just saying; please give me one chance and I swear I won’t disappoint you.” He tried again, trying to reach for your hand, a warm smile on his lips that creeped you the fuck out.

All of a sudden, there was a different hand grabbing his and the guy winced a little. “Ouch, what the-“ but he was cut off when he looked at a maniacally grinning Dellinger, showing off his sharp teeth. “Didn’t you hear what she said? She’s taken.” He chuckled, his grip almost crushing his wrist. “Let go, man! Damn, it hurts! What’s your problem?!” he complained, trying to pry his hand off of his wrist. “What my problem is? I really, reeeeally want to tear you apart and see drown in your own blood.” A high-pitched giggle accentuated his threat and the guy’s face turned white, finally recognizing the young, flamboyant officer of the Donquixote family in front of him.

“I give you ten seconds to get out of here and never show your face in front of her or me again, understood?” he whispered, his eyes glowing red, hoping the guy would defy him. But he was way too scared and took the first chance Dellinger gave him to get out of there.

You watched the guy run for his life before you hooked your arm into his, smiling up at him. “Thanks.” You said. “How dare he try anything like this.” Dellinger cursed. “You shouldn’t have left me here in the first place. Where did you go?” you demanded to know. Your boyfriend’s grin became wider and realization slowly hit you.

“You knew what was going on.” You stated dryly and he couldn’t suppress the small giggles. “Did you also know he had seen me before?” your suspicions were confirmed with his next sentence. “Ever since we went to this stupid café two weeks ago.” You weren’t overly excited hearing this from him. “Did you also know he would come here today?”

“You know I hate book stores. Might as well make the whole thing fun to me.” He chimed, already pulling you out of the store.

“I can’t believe you! So, instead of telling me about this, you just watch him flirt with me and ask me out? And now you even let him get away with it?” your voice grew louder and louder, almost furious at his little stunt. Your anger, however, vanished within the next second.

“Who said I’d let him get away…?” If death had a name, it would most certainly be Dellinger. This boy will rip the other guy’s guts out and eat every single piece of him. This little game was just to fuel his anger and get the revenge you both deserved.

[mikrowrites]

destiny

winchester!sister , dean x sister!reader , sam x sister!reader

SPN SEASON 15 FINALE SPOILERS!!!

summary: Y/N always knew she was destined go out one way or another, so when destiny arrives Y/N just wants her brothers to hold her.

warnings: ANGST, death, blood, violence, language, there’s some fluff I swear!!!

There’s a moment when you are confronted with your destiny.

Maybe your destiny is to end world hunger. Find a cure for an incurable disease, open a restaurant, some shit like that.

Y/N Winchester was always destined to die.

It’s every hunter’s destiny, really. They resign themselves to the incredibly high odds of their inevitablely early demise, and she made her choice long ago. She would die, and her brothers would live...

The vamp wrestled with Y/N, definitely stronger but one of them is holding a machete and guess what? Not him.

She sliced his head clean off, turning and seeing her brothers fighting off the two remaining vamps. Y/N smiled a bit, before rushing over to help Dean. She kicked the back of the vamp’s knee, throwing her brother the machete. He’s about to swing it when the vamp turns, grabbing Y/N and pushing her back against a wooden beam.

Pain enveloped her body as she let out a strangled gasp, looking up into the vamp’s eyes with her own wide ones. The moment doesn’t last long before Dean slices his head clean off. Y/N looked down at her stomach, her breath shakey as her mind reeled, trying to process the situation. Something was pressed into her back, making her insides feel as though they were on fire.

“Hey, Y/N/N?” Dean spoke up, Y/N snapping back to reality, her eyes softening as she looked up at her brothers. “It’s okay, everything’s good, kid. Let’s get out of here.”

“I-I can’t...” Y/N responded, her bottom lip trembling.

“What do you mean?” Sam asked, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

“Uhm...” Y/N struggled to catch her breath, her hand gesturing to her stomach. “I-ah—something... somethings got me, in my back, feels like it’s going right through me, ah-shit...”

Sam walked forwards as Dean remained rooted where he was, his face contorting into one of fear. The taller brother put his hand on Y/N’s shoulder, before reaching and touching her back as the girl hissed in pain. Sam pulled his hand back, his head snapping up to look at his sister when his palm came back painted red.

“That doesn’t look good.” Y/N murmured, Dean rushing over, seemingly surveying the scene.

“Okay, um, if we’re just careful we can pull you off—“

“No! No! Jesus Christ, haven’t you both watched TV? You pull me off I’ll bleed out instantly.” Y/N reasoned. “I’d... I’d die quicker.”

“Sam call for help.” Dean insisted.

“No!” Y/N shouted again.

Sam shook his head. “Y/N, we need to get you help—“

“—and explain the corpses laying around relieved of their heads? Besides, if help came I wouldn’t make it to the—“

“Stop. No.” Dean dismissed. “You aren’t... you’re not dying.”

Y/N bit her lip, shaking her head. “You know that isn’t true.”

Both brothers were silent, looking at their sister in despair and helplessness.

“Just... please... stay with me?”

Dean raised his hand to cup her face, rubbing his thumb over her cheek. “Always.”

Sam walked over, Y/N grasping each of their hands in hers.

“I need you both... to find those two kids and get them somewhere safe.” She spoke to them, her eyes gathering tears.

Dean and Sam nodded, Y/N exhaling.

“And—uhm—Miracle’s food is in th-the lower l-le-left cabinet in the kitchen. A-And—“

“We’ve got it, sweetheart.” Dean reassured, his eyes moistening. “You don’t have to worry about all that.”

Y/N smiled sadly, a tear cascading down her face. “But I’m worried about y-you two.”

The two men became distraught, Y/N continuing. “I need you both to-to m-move on.”

“We’ll find some way, we’ll figure something out and bring—“ Sam began to reason, before Y/N interjected.

“No. No, please, d-don’t do that. Don’t try and bring me back. That ne-never has ended well.”

Sam truly began to cry, Y/N squeezing his hand. She smiled through her own tears, looking at the two men. “You’re my big brothers. I love you-you both s-so much.”

“It can’t end like this.” Dean begged, holding up and grasping Y/N’s hand. “It can’t...”

Y/N cringed in pain, the two brothers looking at each other distraught. A single tear dripped down Dean’s cheek.

“Re-remember when y-you both found me? That was the b-best d-da-day of my life.” Y/N sputtered out. “Y-You took m-me in an-and raised me. Th-Thank you. For be-being my brothers... whe-when you didn’t ne-need to, bec-because you wanted to.”

Sam nodded, Y/N smiling slightly at him as they both acknowledged her fate. She knew Sam would be okay. He was strong, and he could handle this. Y/N was sure of that.

But her smile faded as she turned her head to look at Dean, who was on the cusp of falling apart. Y/N squeezed his hand. “Dean.”

The man looked up at her with the most broken, sorrowful eyes. Y/N exhaled shakily, pulling her hand out of his grasp to lift it to his face, cupping his cheek. “I’m n-not leaving. I’ll al-always be... right h-here.”

She lowered her hand to his heart, Dean placing his large hand over her smaller one. Y/N smiled softly, feeling the darkness blur her vision.

“Pl-please... hold me...” Y/N’s voice cracked, the two brothers immediately pulling their arms around her. Sam sobbed into her shoulder as Dean placed his hand on the back of her head, still holding Y/N’s hand to his chest.

She could feel warmth envelope her body, but Y/N held off, fearful of what would happen if she left.

“Dean?”

“Yeah, Y/N/N?” Dean asked, as tears silently traced down his cheeks.

“I need to kn-know you’ll be okay. I need you to—“ Y/N broke off as she swallowed a sob rising from her throat. “I n-need you to tell me you’ll both be o-okay.”

Dean’s grip on her hand tighted, the man squeezing his eyes shut before pulling away from embracing his sister, nodding through tears as he forced his ever-so-charming smile.

“Yeah sweetheart. We’ll be okay.” Dean sniffed, smiling as he struggled not to fall apart.

“You can let go.”

Y/N exhaled, her face loosening into a neutral expression, one full of peace and finality. She squeezed Dean’s hand one last time before her eyes fluttered shut, her body slacking into Sam’s.

The barn was silent as Dean felt her hand go limp in his, his façade morphing into shock as he struggled to breathe, Sam crying out.

Suddenly Dean’s face began to contort into a painful expression, the tears gathering as a sob ripped from his throat.

His baby sister was gone.

Y/N inhaled deeply, opening her eyes. A soft breeze blew through her hair, her eyes adjusting to her surroundings.

She stood in the valley of a beautiful mountain range, the foliage sporting beautiful shades of green, orange, and yellow. Y/N took a few steps forward, looking around. “Hello?”

“Y/N.”

The girl spun on her heel, stumbling back as her breath caught in her throat. John Winchester, her father, stood before her, considerably younger than when she met him for the first time in the bunker.

“Dad?” Y/N gasped out.

The man smiled, opening his arms. Y/N rushed towards him, wrapping her arms around him, letting her eyes close as she hugged him tightly.

John chuckled. “Welcome home, kiddo.”

Y/N smiled, truly smiled, as suddenly numerous visions flooded her head:

Dean, carrying a little girl through a park, her shirt embroidered with the name “Y/N”.

Sam, marrying Eileen and hunting with her.

A white picket fence in the front yard, photo frames scattered on shelves.

Sam teaching his son to play catch.

Dean, eating pie with his teenage daughter.

Y/N opened her eyes, her smile widening. Her destiny wasn’t so much as to die, though she had to. No, it was much more complex than that.

Y/N’s destiny was to give her brothers the lives they deserved.

“It’s good to be home.”

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tags: @writeroutoftime

[rhysismydaddy]

Hey love, I adore ur nessian fics and was wondering if you could bless us with some Cassian being super hurt/sick and nesta taking care of him(fluff + hurt/comfort yknow)?Ooh and nesta giving him a pep talk when he says he feels worthless-bat boi needs some comfort -(nesta bathing cassian scene for bonus points). Thank you so much! hope ur staying safe and healthy!

thank you <3 hope you’re doing well, too

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Nesta leaned a hip against the doorframe of her bedroom, frowning when she found it empty. “Cass?”

No answer. 

She still searched the place anyway, since he was bad to play music in his headphones too loud and never hear her. She went to the bathroom, kitchen, living room, and even out the back door of her tiny place, but to no avail. 

He wasn’t here. 

Which was odd, considering he wasn’t allowed to drive, and he’d been here when she left for work. 

She grabbed her phone and called him, but no answer. 

Annoyance bloomed as she threw her shoes back on and snatched her keys, then drove the five minutes to his place. By the time she got there, the annoyance had blossomed into full-on irritation, so she didn’t bother knocking, just used the key he’d given her a year ago and marched in. 

When she found him in his bedroom, she paused, and all that pent-up anger whooshed right out of her. 

Beneath the mass of purple bruises decorating him, he was white as a sheet as he struggled to get his sock off. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, grimacing in pain, but didn’t stop until his hand grabbed his foot.

Nesta rushed over, kneeling in front of him. “Cass, you’re going to pop a stitch. What are you doing? Why’d you leave my place?”

He didn’t say anything, just pushed her hands away when she tried to help. 

“Cassian-”

“I’m fine, Nesta,” he snapped, grunting as he ripped the sock off and started on his pants.

“Clearly,” she shot back, standing and crossing her arms. 

She’d been taking care of him for almost two weeks, and this was the thanks she got?

He got the sweats off easier, and her heart pinched as the cast over his broken knee was exposed. With brutal efficiency, he wrapped it in the extra-long trash bags they’d bought at the store, then reached for the duct tape.

Noticing it was a little too far away, she grabbed it and handed it to him.

Golden eyes surrounded by black shot to hers, and she took a step back at how angry they were. “Jesus Christ, Nesta, I’m not an invalid. Stop mothering me.” 

Taking a shaky breath, she nodded and stepped out of his way as he used his uninjured leg to stand up. She knew it was self-hatred and the anger of being injured, not that he was actually pissed at her, but it still hurt.

She’d known his recovery would be difficult, that it would test their relationship, but it was still a shock to her system to be on the receiving end of his rage.

It was horrible to watch as he used the wall to hobble to the connected bathroom, but she maintained her distance and kept quiet. 

But no matter how mad he’d be because of it, she couldn’t stop herself from rushing to him when he started to fall. 

Nesta reached him just in time, catching him around the waist and bracing him as he started to tip forwards. But he was over two-hundred pounds of solid muscle, and though she slowed him down, she couldn’t stop him entirely. 

Her back slammed into the wall next to the tub, the air getting knocked from her lungs in a harsh breath. 

“Goddammit,” he growled, pushing off the wall with one hand and all but throwing himself into the bathtub, somehow managing to keep his wrapped up leg from getting wet. Water sloshed over the sides, but he didn’t seem to care.

Bracing an elbow on the edge, he put his head in his hand and avoided looking at her for a long time. 

She could feel the rage inside him building, feel him turn it on himself. 

“I’m sorry, Nes,” he murmured a few minutes later, still not looking at her. “Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine,” she assured him, coming over to sit on the space behind his head. She ran her hands through his hair, pulling his head back until his eyes met hers. “I know you hate being injured, but you have to stop being so hard on yourself Let me take care of you.”

“I don’t like you seeing me like this.”

She scoffed. “How many times have you taken care of me?”

Cassian shook her head. “That’s different.”

“No, it isn’t. And it isn’t why you’re so upset.”

She knew there was something else causing him to lash out. He’d been injured before, but he’d never acted like it was anything besides a mild annoyance.

His gaze shuttered, but there was such pain, such emptiness in his eyes. She couldn’t take it. 

“Cassian, please talk to me,” she pleaded. “Don’t... don’t shut me out.”

It had taken her forever to open up to him, and she couldn’t stand the feeling that they were moving backwards. 

His head dipped forward, and she released his hair with a sigh, letting him go. 

She was about to leave, give him some alone time, when he said, “I don’t know if I can do this anymore.”

Her heart started to pound, and his gaze shot to hers like he could hear it. “Work, baby. Not you.”

Nesta nodded but stayed quiet, giving him time to figure out what he wanted to say. 

“I don’t know if I can go on another tour, watch men die all around me, get shot and almost die for a cause I don’t believe in.” He looked down. “But I can do it, and I feel like I’d be letting my men down to stop.”

He was in the Marines, and his platoon had hit an IED and been ambushed in enemy territory with no backup. Cassian had fought his ass off to get every member of his unit out alive. 

His knee had been broken in the explosion, but he’d gone back for his injured partners, not even stopping when he got shot in the shoulder. 

He’d saved six people.

He’d always been driven by duty, by honor, but hated that it was now causing such turmoil inside him.

“Oh, Cass,” she murmured, stroking his curly hair away from his face softly. 

“But even if I do quit, I... I don’t know who I am without this, Nes. I’ve been a Marine my whole life; it’s all I am.”

She scowled down at him at that. “Cassian Azara, if you think that’s all you are, you’re the biggest idiot I’ve ever met.”

His mouth opened to answer, but she shouldered on. “You are the most selfless, generous, kind, hilarious, handsome, and intelligent man I’ve ever met. All of those things make you a great Marine, but you’re more than some random military title. And if you don’t want to be a Marine anymore, then quit.”

“But-”

“But nothing. You’ve saved those guys’ asses more times than I can count, and while no one will ever be as good of a leader, someone will step up. You’ve done six tours; no one would blame you for choosing yourself. Do what you want, not what you think you need to.”

“It’s all I know how to do,” he murmurs, looking away from her, but not before she caught the shame in his eyes. 

“No, it’s all you’ve done.”

“What do you mean?”

She put a palm on his cheek, and he leaned into the touch. “You enlisted when you were eighteen. You’ve never done anything besides be in the military. But that doesn’t mean it’s all you could do. You could do a million things”

Some of that darkness left his eyes as he looked up at her. “Like what?”

Nesta shook her head incredulously. “Just with your training alone, you could be a personal trainer, teach self-defense classes, or fight professionally. You graduated at the top of your class; you could go to college and study anything you want. You could be a mechanic like you were in high school. You could fly a rocket to the fucking moon.”

Cassian’s lips twitched. “I don’t know about that one.”

“I do. NASA would be lucky to have you.” He didn’t look quite convinced about the point she was making, so she said, “Baby, with your personality and that face, you could sell car insurance to the Amish.”

He laughed in surprise, and the sound soothed the ache in her chest. 

She pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “And with how fucking stubborn you are, you’ll be the best at whatever you choose. You can do anything you want. Now say it.”

He looked down at his broken knee and muttered, “I can do anything I want.”

Nesta pursed her lips. “Now say it like you mean it.”

His eyes rolled back up to hers in amusement, even as he said confidently, “I can do anything I want.”

She smiled and leaned down to kiss him. “Yes, you can. And whenever you need reminding of it, just tell me.”

“I love you,” he said against her lips, making her smile. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.”

“Yes, I am,” she agreed, still grinning. “Now shut up and hand me the shampoo. You smell worse than you look.”

He threw his head back and howled with laughter, then splashed her and handed her the shampoo. She worked some of it into his hair, the froth slick beneath her hands, and moved his head to lie against the edge of the tub. 

Nesta kissed his brow, knowing that whatever they went through, they’d do it together. “I love you, too, Cassian.”

[immacaria]

Almost

  Hello there! How are you? I hope you are alright! So, this is day 5 of Beetober 2021 from @bloody-bee-tea and the prompt is Almost. This kind of a sequel to Day 1 and takes almost exactly from where the first part ended, so it would be good if you read the first part if you still haven’t. Anyways this day’s word count is 4269 words, way bigger than the previous one lol. Well, this being said, I hope you enjoy this and are okay!

________________________________________________________________

  After the reveal, all hell broke loose and the only thing that Jiang Cheng did was put his mask back on and walk to Nie Mingjue’s side, sitting on the arm of his throne and watching amused as everybody around paled and started throwing questions at him. Beside them, the Nie disciples were invading the room with their sabers in hand and ready to attack. They only stopped because Jiang Cheng lifted a hand and kept staring at the irritated Sect Leaders. 

  “I thought you were dead! You were dead!” Jiang Fengmian said and Wei Wuxian moved to hold him back when two of the oldest disciples stepped ahead, lifting their sabers. “What are you doing here? Why are you here?” 

  “A-Cheng, what happened?” Wei Wuxian asked, surprise and confusion written all over his face. 

  “I died, Wei-gongzi. That’s what happened.” Jiang Cheng crossed his legs, shrugging before leaning back on the throne. “You even mourned me, don’t you remember?”

  “Of course I remember! We all mourned you and what were you doing? You were her-...” He screamed, stepping in front of Jiang Fengmian. 

  “I was dying, that’s what I was doing.” He snarled, eyes lighting up in anger. 

  “Stop saying that! You aren’t dead!” He screamed and this time it was Jiang Fengmian who held him back while the Nie disciples stepped ahead and around the throne. 

  “Because of the Nies! I’m still alive because of the Nies.” He screamed back and Nie Mingjue put an arm in front of him, holding him back, as Nie Huaisang stepped ahead. 

  “Let’s calm down, alright? We can’t do much if -...” Nie Huaisang started but Jin Guangshan spoke over him quickly. 

  “Nie-gongzi, and I don’t mean to offend when I say this, but I think this is a matter between the Jiangs and --” He started but Nie Huaisang quickly cut him off back. 

  “He is not a Jiang anymore, Jin-zongzhu, despite his given name saying the contrary. This is a matter between the Nies and the Jiangs, one that wouldn’t be solved now.” He closed his fan, pointing it at him and the Nie disciples stepped ahead one more time. “When no one but the Jiangs and the Nies are present. So, if you all are to be so kind, please leave so we can settle this down.” 

  “I’m sure that you will ne--” He tried again, but this time it was Nie Mingjue to cut him. 

  “This does not concern you, Jin-zongzhu, or anyone on the Jins for all the matter.” He got up and Jiang Cheng looked up to him, before standing as well. “This conference ended, we will continue this tomorrow.” He announced out loud and saw Jiang Fengmian’s face reddened in anger as he turned around to Jiang Cheng and whispered. “Come on, A-Cheng, let’s go.” 

  “He is not going anywhere!” Wei Wuxian screamed and, to his bad luck, he pulled his sword out. 

  “Wei-xiong!” Nie Huaisang screamed, eyes wide as the first Nie disciple clashed swords with him. “A-Yu!” 

  "Nie Daiyu, retreat right now!" Jiang Cheng barked, lifting his hand to the girl as a thin string flew off it and circled her waist. "Retreat." He said one more time as the string retread and pulled her back. 

  "Wanyin…" Jiang Fengmian started, but he only shook his head, not stepping away from Nie Mingjue. 

  "Swords down. Now!" He said and all the Nie disciples put their swords down - though very bedrungigly so - before looking at his father and Wei Wuxian and sighing. "Later." With that he turned around and walked out of the room with both Nie Huaisang and Nie Mingjue behind him. It wasn’t until they were away from the conference room and sure that nobody was listening to them that Jiang Cheng finally took his mask out and turned to Nie Mingjue as Nie Huaisang disappeared from a side door, pulling him to sit down next to a table and looking all over his face and body. 

  “A-Cheng, I’m fine.” Nie Mingjue said, holding his shoulders at the same time Nie Huaisang came back with a pot of tea and three cups and sat beside them. “That explosion did nothing to me, I swear.” 

  “You are still taking the tea, though.” Nie Huaisang said and passed a cup to him. “What was that, A-Cheng? What the hell?” 

  “I’m so, so sorry. I lost the grab on myself.” He sat between them, hugging his legs and putting his head between his knees. “When they started talking about Shijie marrying that peacock, I- I saw red and before I could think I was ripping the mask out.” 

  “We understand, we really do.” Nie Mingjue said and both of the others said in unison. 

  “Drink the tea, Mingjue.”

  “Shit.” He hissed, before carefully bringing the cup to his lips and making a face at the taste. “This thing is fucking horrible.” 

  “And we are going to drink three of those.” Jiang Cheng added, not looking at him and somehow still urging him up to drink the damned thing. “I just wanted them to take my opinion seriously on that matter.”

  “Well, they did. And that was, for sure, a power move.” Nie Huaisang nodded, opening his fan and smiling slightly when it brought a chuckle from both of the men. They fell in silence, one of them with his eyes closed and face hidden while the other two looked at him worryingly. Jiang Cheng’s shoulders were bended downwards and his breath came in shallow and quick breaths, his hands fisted in the fabric of his robes and every part of his body screamed discomfort and tension. It screamed fear. “Care to share your thoughts with the rest of us?” 

  “I do, actually. And I would prefer not, thanks.” He whispered, curling up even further. “Just let me breathe for a while, okay?” He said before falling silently once more and the brothers shared a look between them. They had been living with that boy for eight years by now and they knew how he could get sometimes.

  In the beginning, it was practically impossible to rile him out of the training fields because he felt that he needed to repay them for letting him stay there instead of kicking him back to Yunmeng like other clans may have done and wanted to learn their style as quickly as possible. When they finally managed to explain that he didn’t need to let his old fighting style go, that he could very well stay practicing the Jiang style, Jiang Cheng had only looked lost for a moment before nodding and leaving. They deemed the topic solved until Nie Huaisang came across him in the dogs’ shelter, sitting exactly like that while one of the biggest and most terrifying Nie dogs simply sat by him and whined. 

  Nie Huaisang had entered there and asked what was wrong but was only met with silence. So, he did the only thing he could and knew that helped his brother and hugged the sad bundle of boy in front of him. The amount of time that they stayed like that wasn’t something that he actually remembered, but he knew that at some point Jiang Cheng’s breaths settled down and, slowly but going, he started to talking and Nie Huaisang swore by the umpteenth time to never let him come back to his old family. 

  “Do you want me to go get Xiao Mifeng for you?” Nie Huaisang asked, already thinking about the maneuver that it would be to bring that beast of a dog to him without destroying absolutely everything.

  “No. He took a bath today, he’s going to be all ridden up all day long.” Jiang Cheng said, this time a little louder than before and shook his head as it lifted up. “Better leave him to lick his wounds in peace.”

  “Like we should do with you?” Nie Mingjue tried and Jiang Cheng turned to him, eyes going from his face to the cup of tea on his hand multiple times. 

  “Drink the tea, Mingjue.” He said, before putting his legs down and taking another deep breath. “No, I don’t need to be left alone. Not now, at least.”

  “Alright.” Mingjue nodded as Nie Huisang scooted closer to him and held his arms out with the best puppy eyes he could do. 

  “A hug, then?” He asked and Jiang Cheng huffed in exasperation.  . 

  “A hug, then.” He rolled his eyes before leaning down against him and having his feet pulled by Nie Mingjue. “And a foot massage, by the look of it. Drink the tea, Mingjue, you still have two more to drink.” He nudged his stomach with his toes and smiled when the man groaned and downed the rest of the tea in one go, shivering and making faces at the taste. 

  “This thing is fucking horrible.” He shuddered and pulled his feet closer. “And a foot massage too.”

  “That and you talking.” Nie Huaisang said, putting his head on the top of his and hugging his shoulders from behind. 

  “Oh, why do I get to be this pampered? I'm going to be useless by the end of the season.” He put a hand on his chest and chuckled along Nie Huaisang when Mingjue groaned loudly. “I’m sorry, Mingjue, really. For not thinking before taking the mask off.”

  “It’s okay, Wanyin. If it was Huaisang in the same situation as Jiang-guniang, I would do the same even if I had passed some time without us talking.” He shrugged, starting massaging his feet. “You should really stop walking around barefoot.” 

  “But it’s so good and freeing. And I was wearing boots at the conference.” He said back, throwing the same puppy eyes Nie Huaisang did before. 

  “Your feet are still all callous and rough from walking around barefoot.” He waved a finger at him and Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes at him. 

  “I’m not a maiden, Nie Mingjue. Leave my feet alone.” He kicked him weakly and heard Nie Huaisang gagging behind his back.

  “You two are gross. Ew!” He made another gagging sound and Jiang Cheng elbowed him in the thighs. “Ouch. Evil baby, evil.” 

  “I’m only five months younger than you.” He muttered, crossing his arms and Nie Mingjue patted his leg pitifully. 

  “We are running away from the topic.” He said and smiled when Jiang Cheng mouthed a 'I hate you' while Nie Huaisang nodded. 

  "Exactly, we are running away from the topic. Talk, A-Cheng." He nudged his shoulder and Jiang Cheng groaned, letting his head fall against his shoulder. "You were saying you were sorry for taking the mask so impulsively." 

  "And I am. I am sorry for it, but I am not sorry for the looks that I put on their faces. That shit was hilarious." He smiled slightly, putting his hands over Nie Huaisang's. "But, thinking now, they aren't worth the hassle I brought upon your clan. I mean, our clan." He corrected himself when Nie Mingjue tightened his grip on his left foot. "It's just that, I know my mother and my father and they are too proud to not take this as an offense. And Shijie is going to be so disappointed at me for not coming back. Wei Wuxian is going to be so mad.” 

  “And none of them are going to do anything because, officially, Jiang Wanyin is dead and you are Nie Qinghua, our cousin and little baby.” Nie Huaisang squeezed him and Nie Mingjue laughed at the wheeze he let out. “Unless you want to go back?” 

  “I don’t want to go back. I don’t want to leave Qinghe and come back to Yunmeng with them. I want to stay here.” He tightened his grip on Huaisang’s hands and hooked one of his feet under Mingjue’s thighs as if afraid that someone would come and take him away from them. 

  “Okay, then. You are not going away. And it isn’t like A-Sang would let you anyway.” Mingjue shrugged as Nie Huaisang nodded and kissed the top of his head. Jiang Cheng smiled at him, patting Nie Huaisang’s hands gently, and turned his face when a knock reached their ears. “Who is it?” 

  “It’s me. Nie Daiyu.” The girl said, still not sliding the door open and by that alone they knew that whatever problem she had brought to them was serious. “I can come back later, if you want.” 

  “No, no, come in, A-Yu.” Jiang Cheng said, sitting up and stealing his boots back. “The tea.” He slid one more cup towards Nie Mingjue at the same time the door opened and revealed a disheveled and angry Daiyu. “What the hell happened to you?” 

  “I got angry and almost got in a fight with Wei-gongzi. It was only because Nie Zonghui held me back that I didn’t end that boy.” She growled before remembering who she was talking to and bowing deeply. “This one apologizes for the indiscretion and causing problems.”

  “Alright, A-Yu, but why are you here?” He chuckled as Nie Huaisang opened his fan to hide his smile and Nie Mingjue lifted the cup to his lips. In front of them, Nie Daiyu took a deep breath and her shoulders went back as she gathered the courage to speak. Or the patience to.

  “Jiang-zongzhu wants to speak with Nie-guwen, I mean, Jiang-guwen, I mean... Wait, what should I call you now? Nie-guwen still or something else?” She shook her head and lifted her hands. “I’m lost here.”

  “Poor girl.” Nie Huaisang chuckled and Jiang Cheng hit his shoulder weakly. “Wait, I didn’t think about that either.”

  “What an idiot.” He rolled his eyes before stopping too and looking between both Nie brothers.  “Do you mind if I still use the Nie name? Like, if the kids keep calling me ‘Nie-guwen’?”

  “What? No! Of course we don’t!” Nie Huaisang said, snapping his fan closed and looking at him horrified. 

  “But you don’t want your name back? Don’t you want people calling you ‘Jiang Cheng’ or ‘Jiang Wanyin’ again? They are your names, after all.” Nie Mingjue said, turning to him and moving to put the cup down before Huaisang’s fan appeared under it and pushed it up again. 

  “The more you delay drinking the tea, the worse it will get.” He said while Jiang Cheng fell silent between them. He was staring at his hands, lost in thought, and his eyes got unfocused for a moment. Slowly he furrowed his eyebrows as he turned to look in Nie Mingjue’s general direction before looking back at his hands again and closing his fingers slowly. 

  “I…” He started before he fell silent again and Nie Daiyu looked at them with fearful eyes. They understood, really.

  In all the years that Jiang Cheng kept living with them, the disciples got used to call him ‘Nie-guwen’, ��Yin-gege’, ‘Hua-shixiong’ and even ‘Cheng-gege’ and they were used to see him like this constant moving person, always barking orders or helping them with their stances in the gentlest way while simultaneously bickering at them. Gods, Daiyu was used to seeing him as this unstoppable person that not even death could hold back and was crazy enough to dump a whole pot of paint on their Sect Leader’s head without fear. 

  So, seeing him with an unfocused look on his face and a loss of words like that, it was terrifying. And all because some asshole didn’t care enough about his son to search properly for him and know where trying to give off the image of a good and worried father. Seriously, she was happy that Nie-zongzhu had come across him and they got to grow up with him because that way they could go and fight tooth and nail for him. 

  “Call me like you always called me, Yu-meimei.” Jiang Cheng said finally, looking up to her with still unfocused eyes but determination written all over it. “Bring the name ‘Jiang Wanyin’ back or even ‘Jiang Cheng’, it’s the same as bringing a boy who has been dead for eight years back.” 

 “So, Nie-guwen still?” She said, face illuminating at the answer. 

  “Yes, Nie-guwen still. And tell my father and my brother to find us in the smaller conference room. I want to end this topic as soon as possible.” He said, smiling at her before turning to Nie Mingjue with furrowed eyebrows. “Drink the damn tea, Mingjue.” 

  “Oh, fuck off.” Nie Mingjue said, downing the thing all at once and making a face at the taste. “This was a bad decision.” 

  “And you still have one more to go.” Another cup was deposited on his hands while Nie Daiyu got up and walked around the table to kneel beside Jiang Cheng with a wide smile on her face. 

  “So you're staying, right? You are not going back?” She nodded, practically jumping up and down on her seat and it was hard to see her as the sixteen years old she was. “Can I hug you?” She asked when Jiang Cheng nodded and squealed when he nodded, throwing herself at him and squeezing him for a moment before grabbing her saber and running out of the room in her giddiness. 

  They smiled at that and when Nie Mingjue finally finished the last cup of tea, they headed to the small conference room, only stopping when Jiang Cheng said that he wanted to change his robes. When he stepped out of his room, he was wearing outer robes in the colors of the Nie clan and inner ones in a pale shade of purple. His hair was half held up by a simple ribbon and he was wearing two earrings with intricate metal work and a purple gem in the middle. It was the first thing that he brought after finally presenting himself to the world as Nie Qinghua. 

  When they finally arrived at the smaller conference room, Jiang Fengmian and Wei Wuxian were already there along with Nie Daiyu, Nie Zonghui and some other Nie disciples. There was a pot of scalding on the table and some pastries on the top of the table and Nie Mingjue quickly reached for one as Jiang Cheng poured them five tea. They sat down with Nie Mingjue in the middle, Nie Huaisang staring at Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng at Jiang Fengmian. 

  Some minutes passed without them saying anything, just looking at each other and Nie Mingjue saw the way that Jiang Cheng started turning his ring around. In front of them, Jiang Fengmian was looking all over his son, taking in all the changes and new details. Wei Wuxian looked torn between starting to say what he thought aloud at any given moment or staying quiet and seeing what they were going to say in their defense. 

  “You look well, A-Cheng.” Jiang Fengmian said, smiling at him and Jiang Cheng smiled back weakly. “Your hair is shorter, though.”

  “A beast got me by it some months ago and I had to cut it to prevent getting my head bitten off.” He shrugged and some strands of his hair slid over his shoulder, barely reaching past his collarbone. 

  “Or maybe it was because you didn’t want to have something to do with the Jiangs anymore.” Wei Wuxian muttered, crossing his arms and looking to the side when Nie Huaisang glared at him. 

  “A-Xian, please.” Jiang Fengmian said before smiling placantigly to Nie Mingjue. “Please, excuse him, he’s just a bit shocked.” 

  “We understand that the situation isn’t the best, Jiang-zongzhu, but please understand that we only want what's best for A-Cheng always.” Nie Mingjue said, smiling back at him and Wei Wuxian glared at him before huffing and saying. 

  “By doing what? Keeping him from his family?” 

  “No, by respecting his wishes.” He retorted and Wei Wuxian huffed again. 

  “Wei Wuxian, please, can’t you believe someone else just this once?” Jiang Cheng said, sighing and looking at his brother tiredly. 

  “No! Not when they are lying and keeping you from us.” He uncrossed his arms and glared right back at him. “Why are you even there, anyways? Why didn’t you come back?”

  “To be what? A ghost? A-Die had already decided that you were going to be the heir of the clan by the time I was strong enough to get back to the clan and I didn’t see any reason to get back if I was only going to be a reason for A-Die to be resentful.” He said, furrowing his eyebrows. “At least here, I had a purpose, Wei Wuxian. I have a purpose.” 

 “What about Shijie? What about me?” He said, put his hand on his chest.

  “What about you? You had Lan Wangji, Shijie had the peacock! I had Nie-zongzhu and Nie-gongzi with me.” He took a deep breath and Nie Mingjue surprised himself with the way that he hadn’t screamed once yet. 

  “But th--”

  “No! Wei Wuxian, stop. Let me talk, at least this once.” Jiang Cheng interrupted him and held his cup to his lips. “After that night hunt, I don’t know if you searched for me or not, and if you did, thank you, but--”

  “They did. The same night you disappeared and when they didn’t find you, they said you had died. Simple like that.” Nie Huaisang said, at the left side of Nie Mingjue and glaring at both Wei Wuxian and Jiang Fengmian. “Sorry, A-Cheng. Didn’t mean to interrupt.” 

  “It’s okay, A-Sang. Anyways, after the night hunt, I woke up disoriented and started walking around until I found a kind enough lady that took me back to Yunmeng where I discovered that I was dead. Surprise, surprise. The lady waited for me and explained that apparently the Jiang heir was missing and had been declared dead two days before.” He shrugged, drinking the tea before continuing. “I thanked her and kept walking away. At first, and maybe because I was disoriented and poisoned, I thought that I was a ghost. So, I started wandering around and traded some of my old things for new and unbloodied robes. That was how I found Nie-zongzhu, near here actually. That way, I think.” He pointed to the general direction of a part of Qinghe’s forest before turning back to his brother, eyes sharp and angry. “I’m still alive because Nie Mingjue found me and took care of me. I’m still alive because Nie Huaisang didn’t let me go back. I’m still alive because I didn’t want to go back. So, if you want to scream at the Nie clan, scream gratitudes and thanks for keeping me alive and well. Because if I had come back, I surely would have died.”

 “What? But, we called you! We called for you multiple times.” Wei Wuxian said, eyes frantic as he looked between the three of them. “‘Surely would have died’? What are you trying to say, A-Cheng?” 

  “Nothing, I’m just stating facts. The poison in my body wasn't merely from the beast we had been fighting against that day, there was something more. Something that was there before we got to the beast.” He shrugged before his eyes went to Jiang Fengmian. “Nothing to say, A-Die?” 

  “What are you trying to imply here, A-Cheng? Are you trying to say that someone tried to poison you? Someone from Yunmeng?” Wei Wuxian asked, eyes wide, as Jiang Fengmian and Jiang Cheng stared at each other. 

  “I don’t know, Wei Wuxian. The day is a blur in mind, but what I know is that I almost died and I’m not risking it again.” He shrugged, finishing his tea and taking one of the pastries on the plate. “Have you tried one of these, A-Die? I find them especially delicious.” He smiled and his smile was nothing beside just a pull of his lip, a dark and dangerous thing. 

  “I have. They are good, yes.” Jiang Fengmian said, smiling and drinking some of his tea too. “A-Li will disappointed you are not coming back, A-Cheng, and your mo--”

  “Will live, I’m sure. I’m not coming back, A-Die. I’m staying here with the Nies and If you must call me something, call me either Nie Qinghua or Nie-guwen.I’m not a Jiang anymore.” Jiang Cheng said and bit at the pastry as Nie Huaisang closed his fan and smiled at them.

  “Are there any other matters you want to solve, Jiang-zongzhu? Because if there is not, Zonghui will gladly take him and Wei-xiong to your quarters for the night.” Nie Mingjue said and watched as Wei Wuxian turned between him and Jiang Cheng. “We’ll see each other at the conference tomorrow, I assure.”

  With that Nie Zonghui stepped ahead and bowed at them, waiting for them to get up and follow him. Jiang Fengmian stared at him for some more seconds before smiling and bowing at him, thanking him for tea and the pastries while Wei Wuxian followed suit, though a lot more bedrungigly so. After they left, Jiang Cheng sighed and leaned against Nie Mingjue, putting his head against his shoulder and nipping at the pastry in his hands. 

  The next morning, Nie Mingjue explained what they had decided and followed with the conference as usual. Jiang Cheng stayed at his side the whole time, this time without his mask, and didn’t run away from any questions that the other Sect Leaders threw at him as much as he didn’t even blinked when he refused to go back to Yunmeng. He had almost died once in there, he was not risking it again. Not when he had a family that loved and cared for him in Qinghe. 

[rabbitlover1027]

Nessianmonth @illyrianet

Prompt: Jealousy

Cassian ground his teeth tightly and Nesta could see his displeasure despite his best attempts to keep his face neutral. However, tonight's ball was a formal affair being hosted by the Night Court so Cassian dipped his head as Kallias's emissary wrapped his hand around Nesta's and led her to the dance floor.

Feyre and Rhysand had both been reluctant to host a ball in honor of Nyx's first birthday, but Mor had playfully pouted it was a perfect way to officially introduce Nyx to all the courts of Prythian. To which Amren had pointed out the benefits to the Night Court of using this as another opportunity to strengthen relationships between the courts, especially as they would still be needing strong alliances within Prythian if Hybern or Koschei went to strike again. Up against Amren's argument and Mor's begging, the High Lord and Lady reluctantly agreed to host with the understanding that Nyx would be present for very little of the actual celebration and that they would all celebrate his birthday as a family privately as well.

And so, the High Lords of the other courts along with families invited by lottery from Velaris assembled to celebrate Nyx with a night of dining and dancing held in Velaris itself. As predicted, the other courts agreed to come, having only been previously invited to events at the Hewn City, if at all to the Night Court. Amren and Azriel had both been certain the promise of seeing Velaris would be enough to gather the courts and they had been correct. Only the Spring Court sent no one to the festivities, but that too had been predicted and expected.

Sparring earlier in the day, Cassian had teased Azriel about who he would take with him. Azriel had coolly responded he had no doubt there would be plenty of other things for him to do with so many visiting guests besides simply eating and dancing. And while Cassian knew tonight was court business, he also fully intended on eating and dancing with his mate. The mate who was now dancing with another male.

Nesta looked stunning as usual. Her velvety dark gray dress was held up by two thin straps and the skirt was tulle, full and flouncy, in the same shade of gray. Scattered all over the skirt, tiny crystals sparkled in the lights like twinkling night stars. Her long hair was twisted back from the front and left to drape down her back.

Cassian had already shot warning glances to a few of the males he had seen looking at her a little too long. Nesta had cocked an eyebrow in his direction after the first few times, giving him the indication that she was aware of what he was doing and irritated, but she had said nothing out loud to him about it.

Cassian knew Nesta loved dancing and this new emissary seemed very familiar with the particular dance taking place, not missing any of the steps and twirling Nesta at all the right times. Even thru the crowds he could see the flush of excitement on her cheeks and the glow in her eyes. He knew he had duties expected of him as a member of the court hosting the party so he turned to find Rhysand and Feyre, leaving Nesta to the dance. He was certain she would seek him out later.

Rhysand and Feyre did indeed have tasks they wanted Cassian to take care of. He greeted guests and made comfortable small talk so Azriel could quietly feel out any useful information. More than once he let his eyes slide to the dance floor where Nesta was still dancing with the emissary, Tantalos. Cassian felt his stomach tighten as he watched Tantlos's hand slide across Nesta's back and then Cassian's companion said his name. Cassian realized he'd been caught not paying attention and turned back to face the fae, apologizing.

When Cassian finally did go to take his turn on the dance floor, it was with Cresseida, who had grabbed his hand giggling and demanded he dance with her before Tarquin could bring up Cassian's escapades from his last visit to Summer Court. Cassian turned his head to look for Nesta before lifting Cresseida's hand up to his shoulder and saw Nesta still with Tantalos, only now she was laughing as he spun her around the floor. She was almost beaming, as Tantalos leaned in close and spoke into her ear. As he pulled her hand up close to his chest, drawing Nesta even closer up against his body. Cassian started to see red, almost let go of Cresseida to go to Nesta, but stopped himself and started their dance.

When Rhysand interrupted later, requesting a dance with Cresseida, Cassian had politely bowed to Cresseida and left the two of them to dance. He had passed Nesta twice on the dance floor while dancing before she had even seemed to notice him, so caught up in dancing and talking to Tantalos. Cassian was determined to cut in as Rhys had just done and be the one touching Nesta, talking close in her ear, and making her glow. Because she was. She was glowing while with Tantalos and it was making Cassian's breathing shallow. She didn’t even look his direction as he started to cross the room towards her and then Feyre was in front of him smiling tiredly and asking for a dance.

And so it was all night. Cassian flitted from dance partner to the next and would only briefly be able to catch Netas’s eye as they passed each other on the dance floor. Or as he danced with guests and spied her sitting at a table with Tantalos, eating cake. Every time Cassian was sure he could get back to his mate, his beautiful mate, he was detained and she spent the evening with a male he had just barely met. He couldn't stop tapping his fingers together, anything to try and squash some of his frustration out.

Many of the guests were staying at the House of Wind. Rhysand and the rest of the Inner Circle came up to Cassian and Netas’s home to say goodnight to guests before departing. As Nuala and Cerridwen gracefully escorted guests to their rooms, Tantalos approached the spot where Cassian had finally been able to reach Nesta. Tantalos lifted Nesta’s hand with his before Cassian could even greet Nesta.

“I had a lovely time with you tonight,” his voice was deep and sensual. “I look forward to working closely with you in the future.” Without breaking eye contact with Nesta he added to Cassian, “Nesta is rather exquisite. I hope you take good care of her, or….” Tantalos shrugged his shoulders and then kissed Nesta's hand before walking off to be shown his room.

Cassian was livid. His chest was tight and heaving, his wings were practically trembling. Nesta spun angrily on him and placed her palm on his arm hissing.

“You are not serious right now.”

“What?” Cassian raged.

“We need to talk, alone.” And Nesta quickly padded off into the house towards their bedroom.

Cassian practically slammed the bedroom door shut behind him, the guest rooms were thankfully on the other side of the house so there would no one to hear them. Nesta was ripping pins out of her hair and refused to turn to face him as he entered.

“What was that, Nes?” he ground out, standing still and trying to calm his seething body.

“What was what? That I danced with Kallias's emissary? Or that you are acting like a territorial Illyrian male in front of everyone?” Nesta had turned now and Cassian could see a glimmer of silver dance across her irises. Oh, she was definitely mad but Cassian was not backing down. “You didn't come once to me all night! You danced with almost every High Lord's wife present and I saw you dance with Mor twice. But you're all riled up at me for dancing with one male?”

“Who’s serious now, Nesta?” Cassian stepped closer and his voice dropped low. “I was working, doing all the things Rhys and Fryre requested while you barely even looked at me all night!” Cassian's wings began to spread out behind him casting shadows across the already dimly lit room. “You're my mate! And he’s the one kissing your hand on the balcony for anyone to see. Did you even see the two of you together all night?” His voice was raspy now.

Nesta's eyebrows shot up and her eyes went wide in anger. She exhaled angrily and began to shake her head. She slipped out of her dress and scooped it off the floor still shaking her head and went to hang it up. She didn't make it to the closet.

Cassian caught her, his calloused hands sliding over the slip she still wore. He turned her towards him, one hand cupping her face tightly, but not aggressively. The other hand grabbed her dress and threw it at a chair. He pressed his mouth down on to hers and even though she slid her hands to his chest like she was about to push him away, she raised herself up on her tiptoes into the kiss. Cassian wound his fingers into her hair and kissed her deeper.

“You’re my mate, Nesta, and I don’t like looking at you with other males. I don't like the way he looked at you. And I will be damned if he ever kisses your hand in front of me again. You are mine, he doesn't get to touch you.”

Nesta dropped back to the heels of her feet and scoffed, “You sound ridiculous. We’ve been mated almost a year, Cassian. I’m fae now, we've got a long time together, you can’t expect that I will never be close to another male again. Tantalos doesn't mean any-"

Cassian slid Nesta’s body up against his and she could feel his hardness. Feeling him pressed against her, Nesta's anger began to falter. Her arms went around his neck and this time she pulled him into the kiss. His kiss was rough and he nipped her lower lip. He put his face down by her neck and breathed in her scent. “Mine,” he growled in her ear before moving his lips up her neck. Nesta's breath hitched as Cassian sucked in the skin on her neck. Cassian laughed lowly against her, “Hear that, sweetheart? Hear how your body reponds to mine after just a few kisses, Nes?” Cassian pushed Nesta's slip to the floor, “You're mine.”

Cassian laid Nesta on to the bed and then hooked his hands under her knees and pulled her to the edge where he was standing. He leaned his body over hers and started kissing from the other side of her neck down inbetween her breasts as he slid two fingers inside her. Nesta clamped down against his touch and rocked her hips. A soft whimper escaped from her mouth and he dragged his tongue straight down until his mouth was next to the hand she was writhing on and stopped. Nesta sucked on her lip and looked down locking eyes with Cassian.

“Nesta?” Cassian waited while Nesta licked her lips and ground down harder on his fingers. Nesta was panting when she parted her lips to speak.

“I’m yours, Cassian.” Nesta's breasts rose and fell with each trembling breath. “I’m your mate.”

Cassian slid his fingers out of Nesta to take off the rest of his clothes as she watched. As she stared at his cock and rocked her hips again. As she dragged her eyes up to his face.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Cassian's voice was husky as he promised her, “I’m going to treat you like my mate.”

Nesta gasped and went to push her hips up off the bed as Cassian's tongue licked over her opening, but Cassian spread his warm hand over her waist and pushed her back down to the bed. Swirled his tongue over her peak and pressed his fingers back in. He started sliding his tongue over her at the same pace he was using to push his fingers deep inside of her and Nesta twisted her fingers into his hair, gasping and throwing her head back on to the blankets. Cassian could do this everyday and Nesta knew she would never get tired of it, the way he made her lose control of herself using just his tongue. Her legs started shake and Cassian drew back to tell her, “I’m going to make you come, Nes.”

Nesta cried out when he put his mouth back between her legs and Cassian drove his fingers in to match Nesta's hips as her body rocked thru her orgasm. Nesta panted, gulping air back into her lungs and found she was trying hard to focus her attention to Casian as he crawled up the bed to her. She was already so wet from his attentions that he was able to thrust deep inside her as he he lowered his mouth next to her ear. Nesta moaned and wrapped her legs around his waist ready to take everything she knew he was about to throw at her.

“Mine,” he whispered.

[sunset-curve-fantom]

You could do one where the reader is a mean and scary girl who scares everyone and she is friends with the boys and likes Reggie. Until one day the boys go through her things and discover that she likes someone, but does not say who. They repent anyway because the reader finds out and gets angry making the boys afraid of her. Reggie, with a bit of courage, asks the reader who she likes and she confesses that she likes him and Reggie confesses back?

Warnings: None

A/N: I HOPE YOU ENJOY, I HOPE I DID THIS JUSTICE FOR YOU.

You had always been the girl everyone was terrified of, everywhere you went something terrible happened. Eventually, your friends began dropping out of your life, afraid of something happening to them for being in the same room as you.

So, you ended up being the freak, the person everyone was terrified of. You had lost so many people in your life; it seems everyone else was trying to avoid getting hurt as well. So, they just walked away when you needed people the most. 

The only person who had enough courage to approach you was Julie Molina, bless her whole heart. She just lost her mom and she was going to confront the most mean and scary girl in her school.

“Excuse me?”

You turned around, hair swinging over your shoulder as you looked her up and down. Too busy to even care about her standing there. You turned back to your friends, “Excuse me” You heard again, but slightly more forceful.

“What” The anger was dripping from your words, everyone was terrified of you. Why wasn’t this girl? She just didn’t know when to walk away from a dangerous situation, meaning you.

“I just- can we have a moment skank’s?” She said, looking at your group of friends. This only make you laugh as you nodded at them.

“Well isn’t little Molina confident today, how can I help you?” She cowered back a little, almost afraid if she got too close something was going to happen. You had never actually hurt anyone, but lots of people close to you had died. Sets a bad precedent, I guess.

“Uh yeah- uh-uh-uh…”

“Spit it out, Molina” At this rate, she wasn’t going to tell you what she needed till Christmas.

“Uh- I was just thinking… I know you don’t have many close friends. And I know you lost your mom- so I was wondering if you wanted to come over after school? Just for a bit?” Julie said, almost scared of your reaction. No one has ever wanted to be your friend; let alone this girl you barely knew.

Your expression softened; it was not something you ever expected from her. She was the epitome of happiness and light, while you were so dark and full of sadness. It was an odd mix.

“Can I think about it? If that’s okay, Julie…” You said in a low voice, she nodded. Handing you a piece of paper with her phone number on it. To just let her know before the day was over.

This idea of a new friend, it brightened the anger you held in your soul. The mean and scary just became a way of deflecting the pain and suffering. It made you stronger and that was what was important, especially after such loss.

By third period, you had come to one conclusion. You were going to try your hardest to be friends with Julie Molina… and that was the first goal you had in many years.

You met Julie at the end of the day, walking back to her house. Deciding to spend your afternoon in the garage, you were surprised by the three boys sitting on the couch and chatting.

“Uh hi- I didn’t know you invited others?” You said, confusion clearly coating your features. While Julie was just stunned, clearly startled that you saw them.

“You can see them?”

You blinked rapidly and they were still there, “Uh yeah? Am I supposed to pretend they don’t exist or something?” You just chuckled under your breath, you found yourself quite funny.

The boys looked just as confused as Julie, “What?” You said again.

“They-they-uh they are ghosts…” Julie said, clearly waiting for your reaction. Instead of freaking out, you just sat your bag down before reaching out to the boy closest to you.

But your hand didn’t go through his shoulder, it just landed softly. As if he was really sitting in front of you. You whipped your head towards Julie, this girl you barely knew. You both were absolutely confused.

“Why-um I can touch him?” You said, swallowed the thick lump in your throat. Did you die and go to heaven or something? The boy you were touching finally spoke up,

“Well that’s a new occurrence because Julie goes right through us… And hi, I’m Reggie.” He said, clearly uncomfortable with his new reality. You could touch him, and it seems you are the only one who could.

“Well hi, uh I am Y/N. I just became friends with Julie today and this is totally weird but yet cool.” You said, the scary and mean behavior that everyone was used to, sliding off. Revealing the hurt, and scared girl underneath, who was trying so hard to hold herself together throughout the day.

You were in your own world before Julie spoke up, “And that’s Alex, and of course Luke. Ignore him, he flirts too much” You just laughed at her remark.

Instead of making one friend, you made four in one day. That is a whole new record.

The next few months were filled with some of the happiest times before you were faced with something new. A crush, a crush on a ghost. Like how do you even approach something like that? There is no book for it...

“Julie, what do I do? I have a crush on a ghost, he’s not living and technically I am a freak of nature and shouldn’t be able to see him” You huffed before landing on her bed. She just laughed at your reaction.

“You a crush? I thought you were all mean and scary and didn’t need anyone? Besides whom is-” Throwing a pillow at her before she could finish her statement, she laughed at your horrified reaction.

‘Seriously Jules… you don’t need to ask who it is; you already know just think about it” You said, handing her your journal. It was filled with lyrics and journal entries. It never mentioned a name, but it was clear that it was Reggie. He had opened a door into your world, that you never ever wanted to close.

She sat across from you, squealing at each entry. It was everything you didn’t know how to say, you had never been good with words. Especially after your mom died, it was hard to open up to anyone and be able to hold real relationships. That’s were the mean and scary persona comes in, when you hide your feelings. No one wants to be your friends, which means you didn’t have to open up. But that changed with Julie and the guys.

Julie was too busy squealing to herself, that she missed the boy’s poof in. She only noticed they had company when Alex spoke up, “Whatcha reading?”

He carefully made his way over to where Julie was sat, when you ripped the journal out of her hands, “It is none of your business, okay? You need to be rehearsing anyways” You said, placing the journal back into your bag. You and Julie made your way to the garage, but little did you know the guys stayed behind to read said journal.

In their eyes it was clear you had a crush, and it was bad. You were falling hard… They knew something had changed, as you didn’t come across so harsh anymore and you genuinely seemed happy, more often than not.

They put the journal back, and poofed into the garage before you and Julie got there, but the moment you saw them, you knew. You knew they had done something, but you couldn’t put your finger on what. That was until Luke started to sing YOUR song lyrics under his breath,

Life is a risk, but I will take it

Close my eyes and jump

Together, I think that we can make it

C'mon let's run

And rise through the night, you and I

We will fight to shine together, bright forever

You quickly turned around, glaring in Luke’s direction. The minute he caught your gaze, he knew he was in deep trouble, not only with you but with Julie.

You charged at him; every ounce of happiness drained from your face. “YOU?!? Do not tell me you did what I think you did…”

If he had blood running through his veins, he would be as pale as a literal ghost. He carefully backed away from you, hiding behind Alex

“We just wanted to know… Who is the guy? Cause you have been a lot happier recently” Luke said, you pushed Alex out of the way before making a beeline for Luke. You swiftly picked up a book from the piano and chucked it at his head. Of course, it hit him instead of going through.

“OUCH… I may have forgot you can do that. But we just wanted to know. You don’t have the scary façade anymore; you seem more genuine which is something we love to see. I didn’t even notice it at first, Reggie did.” Luke said, rubbing the back of his head. You whipped around again, this time looking at Reggie. He looked like he was going to shit his pants any moment.

“And what do you have to say? Cause it better be good” You said, stepping closer to him.

“I just- You seem more yourself, and I love to see that. I only wanted to know who this lucky guy was because you are one in a million. That’s all, I just wanted to know who he was and if he would take care of you the way you deserve” Reggie said honestly, it felt good to get it off his chest.

Alex just Aww’d in the background until you gave him a deathly glare.

“Reggie all you had to do was ask, you didn’t have to read my journal. It doesn’t really tell you anything.” You said, as Reg laughed under his breath. You were so caught up in him, you missed Julie escorting the boys out, in their words “at the best part”

You took a deep breath before finishing your statement, you could feel the tears beginning to pool in your eyes.

“Reg I have always the girl everyone was terrified of. I was scary and mean, and I had no one. Everyone, and I mean everyone hated me, and no one wanted to be my friend... I met Julie and that helped some, but you came into my life and you opened a door into my dark world. You fill everything with light, and I have fallen for you so hard. I have been so scared to even say something, I know my behavior has changed but that it because of you. You bring a happiness into my world that I never want to be without. It is you, Reg. I love you.” You said, hot tears pouring down your face.

He stepped towards you as he watched you fall apart. Reaching out he placed a warm hand to your cheek. His calloused thumb rubbing away tears. He wanted nothing more than to take away the pain from your past. He wanted nothing more than to fill your life everyday with happiness until he was unable to anymore.

“You, my love have no idea how much I have fallen for you. You aren’t scary or mean... you are perfect. That is all I see in you.” He said, placing a swift kiss to your forehead.

For the first time in your life, someone was deciding to stay instead of running away. You weren’t scary, you just needed to find the right person to bring a light into your life that you were missing.

Reggie was that light.

Taglist:

@notasofti @julies-molina @parkeret @calamitykaty @kcd15 @crybabyddl

@all-in-fangirl @gia-kerks @morganayennefertyrell

[nightshade-minho]

-Free Rent- ‘Melted Ice-Cream’-

Hyunsung + fem!reader, ft. Felix

Warnings: nipple play, food play, anal play, anal penetration, creampie, unprotected sex, face-fucking, etc.

Moving in with the boys was a lot more fun than you had thought. Sure, the day you moved in, Minho and Chan chose to welcome you in the most unconventional way possible...but it had been two days since Chan spent the night with you after that big dinner, and nothing sexual had happened since then.

They were quite kind, and not the reckless hooligans that Mina had made them out to be. The dinner they’d made to celebrate your arrival was probably the most delicious thing you’d ever tasted. They were all very courteous to you, and for the next two days they helped you settle in.

You were currently sitting on the sofa watching a movie along with Felix, who you quickly realized was a bit of a cuddler.

He had his arm around you, pressing your body close to his as he watched. It was a stark contrast to the last time he had his arms around you, holding on to your waist as you rode his cock.

To your knowledge, Changbin and Minho had gone to the grocery store for supplies, while Seungmin and Jeongin had already gone to sleep in their room. Hyunjin and Jisung were also in the living room, but they weren’t paying any attention to the movie; one was sprawled on the floor with his phone while the other was focusing all his concentration on a plate of leftover cheesecake.

You couldn’t deny that originally, you had expected them to not really warm up to you in this way, thinking that some of them would view you as nothing more than a sex object. Your fears were invalid, as they were all quite eager to accommodate you, and you were starting to feel quite comfortable with each and every one of them.

Suddenly you felt Felix’s hand which was around your shoulder sneak down to your breast, softly groping it. You looked up to see him staring at you, biting his lip. “Is this okay?” He whispered. You nodded, shuddering as he let his thumb ghost over your nipple. You looked at Hyunjin and Jisung, but both of their eyes were still trained on the phone and cake, respectively.

Felix softly rubbed your bud through the thin tank top, leaning in lightning quick to suck wetly on your nipple, moving to your other nipple and taking that into his mouth as well. He leaned away, his eyes roving over how his saliva had made the white fabric transparent, your nipples now clearly visible. He went back to drawing circles on your buds with his thumb, his gaze drifting back to the television for a while, chuckling at the way your breathing was laboured.

He leaned in close to your ear. “You have perfect tits, y/n. Maybe you’ll let me fuck them? Let’s go to my room.”

You looked at Jisung. “What about him?” You said, referring to Felix’s roommate. He shook his head. “Trust me, Jisung prefers savouring his cheesecake at a really slow pace.”

You were about to agree when you heard Chan’s voice. Felix’s hand quickly dropped from your boob as the four of you turned around to see a smiling Chan.

“Hi guys. Uh, I’d like to talk to y/n, if that’s fine?”

They all nodded, even Felix, who reluctantly let go of you. You got up and walked over to Chan who grabbed your hand and led you aside to the kitchen.

“Hey, just wanted to tell you that if you do want your room painted, we can get someone to do that. Of course you wouldn’t be able to sleep there for a few nights...it’s alright, Minho and I will sleep on the sofa, and you can take our room.”

You giggled nervously. “Oh, no...please don’t go that trouble. I’ll sleep on the sofa. It’s really more comfortable than my old bed, so-“

Chan cut you off. “No, you can sleep in any of our rooms. The beds can fit three anyway. I was just afraid that you would feel uncomfortable...you’re not sleeping on the sofa.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but Chan spoke before you could say anything. “So...there’s something else. A girl called Mina keeps calling here, but you’re never around when she does. Does the name ring a bell...?”

Mina. Fuck. You hadn’t spoken to her since she told you about this whole thing. You felt guilt settle itself in your heart, promising yourself that you would call her tomorrow, since you knew she never kept her phone with her after 8 PM. Some weird “mindfulness” thing. You sighed. It had only been about three days, but you missed Mina and her inclination for yoga and smoothies that she claimed were ‘healthy’...(when you knew they consisted of just oranges, peaches and a shit ton of sugar.)

“Yeah, she’s my best friend.”

Chan widened his eyes. “Ah, okay then. Anyway, I’ll let you get back to what you were doing. Wouldn’t wanna let Felix down, right?” You gasped, as he winked at you. So he did see what was happening.

He left the kitchen, presumably to go back to his room. It was about 10 PM. You weren’t feeling very sleepy, but you knew it was time to go to bed, since you needed to wake up early tomorrow. Even though it was a Saturday, you knew that Mina had to go to an environmental club meeting in the afternoon, so you had to meet her before then.

You went back to the living room, searching the room for Felix only to see him absent. You frowned, going to sit down on the sofa. “Guys, where’s Felix?”

Hyunjin scoffed. “Oh, so now we exist?”

You raised your eyebrows. “Wait, what?”

Jisung rolled his eyes, setting down his empty plate on the table and coming over to sit beside you, leaning forward, his face hovering in front of yours. “You think we didn’t notice? We’re not blind.” He gestured to the two wet spots on your shirt, and you mentally smacked yourself for forgetting. So that’s how Chan came to know. You felt a blush spread across your cheeks, embarrassed.

Hyunjin finally tore his eyes away from his phone, getting up off the floor to sit on your other side, his hand firmly gripping your thigh.

“Felix went to his room to sleep right after you left with Chan.”

Ah. So that’s why he left. He probably thought that Chan was taking you away to spend the night with him. You shook your head. If only he’d waited a few more minutes...

You jolted back to reality when Hyunjin’s fingers now crept up your thigh, pressing against your underwear. His graceful fingers pressed your clit, as Jisung pulled the sleeve of your tank top down, exposing your boob. His finger came up to touch your nipple, which was still slightly wet from what Felix had done earlier.

“You really seemed to enjoy what Felix was doing to your nipples...” He pinched one, a squeal ripping from you when he did so. “Felix loves your boobs. It’s the first observation he made about you.” Jisung leaned in to lick a stripe over your nipple, looking over at Hyunjin.

“Not gonna join?”

“I’m more of an ass guy myself.”

Jisung grinned. “So am I.”

Jisung paused for a minute, seemingly deep in thought, before his eyes widened and he stood up.

“I have an idea.”

He left the room and you looked at Hyunjin, confused. He shrugged, pulling you onto his lap. He tugged at the hem of your top, pulling it off of you. He pulled down your shorts next, and put his hands on your ass cheeks. He stretched them apart as he looked up at you, his eyes filled with ardor.

“God, y/n, you drive me crazy. I’ve been waiting to have my way with you again since that day we all fucked you. Truth be told, I wish Jisung wasn’t a part of this right now, but we’ll get our alone time later. After all, you’re not leaving any time soon, right?”

You nodded, and he spoke again. “There’s just something about you. I think it’s the way your innocence co-exists with your sexiness...we all noticed it. It was why we chose you almost immediately. A lot of candidates came by, you know? None of them had that je ne sais quoi...the spark.”

He put his finger in his mouth and wet it. You moaned, because as he was speaking he had pulled your thong to the side, his saliva-covered finger tracing your rim.

Jisung came back into the room just then, holding a bottle of lube and...a tub of ice-cream?

You looked on, confused, as he set down the things on the table. Just then Hyunjin’s finger slipped into your anus and you gasped. He moved it in and out shallowly.

Jisung suddenly came over and lifted you off of Hyunjin, carrying you and placing you on the armchair instead. You heard Hyunjin let out an indignant sound, which he ignored. Jisung smirked up at you as he lifted the lid off the tub of ice cream. There was only a little bit left, enough for about a scoop or so, and it was all melted. Jisung used a spoon to take some and drip it all over your stomach, some of it pooling in your belly button. Though it was melted, it was still cold, and the sensation was making you dizzy. He drizzled some over your boobs as well. Throwing the spoon on the floor, he leaned in to lick the cream off you slowly.

He was taking his time, his tongue laving over your skin. Through half-open eyes you saw Hyunjin come over, leaning in to lick the ice-cream off your boobs as Jisung paid attention to your belly button, his tongue swirling around it.

Your wetness was gushing out of you by now, and you wanted to press your thighs together...but Jisung kept them spread apart. His fingers were hovering near your center...the attention you were being given was nice, but you were getting impatient.

Finally, you let out a load moan. “Just fuck me already!” The two boys stopped, looking at you. That was a mistake. There was anger flashing across their eyes now.

Jisung picked you up, throwing you over his shoulder and taking you to Hyunjin’s room, which was close to the kitchen. Changbin still hadn’t come back from the grocery store, so it was currently empty. When he reached, he threw you down on the bed with a lot more force than necessary, and you whimpered as he crawled over you. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Hyunjin close the door behind him.

“Fucking whore. Can’t you just take what we’re giving you without any complaints?”

You felt the bed dip as Hyunjin moved onto it, settling above you. From your position, you could only see his face upside-down...but the frown on his face was still clear.

You closed your eyes. Jisung lifted your leg up over his shoulder as he pulled your thong off. His fingers went to your ass.

He looked up at Hyunjin. “You got to have her ass last time, so it’s my turn now. I bet she’s tight as hell...”

He squirted some lube onto his fingers, and applied it to your anus, two of his fingers slipping in at once, causing you to throw your head back and open your mouth in a loud moan. Just as you opened your mouth, you felt someone shove their cock in between your lips, sliding in. You choked, tears slipping down as your eyes shot open. Hyunjin pulled you up slightly so he could fuck your throat easier.

Meanwhile Jisung pulled his fingers out, pulling down his sweatpants enough so his cock could come out. He stroked it a few times before aligning it with your anus.

“You said you wanted to get fucked, slut? Here you go.”

His cock rammed into your ass and you cried out, gagging around Hyunjin’s length.

The pain quickly gave way to pleasure as the two of them worked up a rhythm. Hyunjin let his hands drift over your sticky skin, pinching from time to time. The slight, sudden bursts of pain made you clench around Jisung each time, causing him to groan loudly.

Jisung pulled out, followed by Hyunjin. He flipped you around so you were on your stomach, and Hyunjin moved up so that you could suck his cock more comfortably. You opened your mouth to take him in just as you felt Jisung slam back into you, his length moving in and out of you rapidly.

His grip on your hips was so tight, that you were sure bruises would form. You looked up at Hyunjin who gazed at you with a serious look on his face, absent-mindedly rubbing circles on your shoulder as he face-fucked you.

Jisung’s cock twitched in you, and you knew he was getting close. His hands reached down to rub on your clit furiously, and you hit your high quickly. He came almost right after, pulling out and watching his cum leak down your ass to your pussy.

Hyunjin’s thrusts were getting sloppy too. He pulled out, and told you to sit up. You did. He groaned as he stroked his cock, cumming all over your boobs. Hyunjin sighed, leaning back and pressing his face to his pillow, falling asleep quickly.

You turned around to face Jisung, who bit his lip as he surveyed you, covered with white fluid that could either be cum or ice-cream. He leaned forward all of a sudden and scooped you up into his arms, getting up and kicking the door open with his feet.

Baffled, you stared up at him.

He saw your expression and laughed. “Oh look at you, y/n. Your nipples are literally covered with cum...so wet and erect. I think I’d be a pretty shitty friend if I didn’t take you to Felix.”

You blushed as you remembered Felix’s intentions. Jisung smiled down at you as he stepped out of Hyunjin’s room to take you to his...only to bump into someone.

The two of you looked up to see Changbin, his hands holding grocery bags.

He took one look at you and glared.

“Now, just where do you think you’re going without me? Cause whatever this is, I want to be a part of it.”

[shunsuiken]

hc’s for Kuroo and Bokuto with a fem!s/o that DOES NOT STOP TALKING!!EVER!!! like she seems quiet and calm at first, but then she surprises them; please 🥺🥺 xo

due to my illiteracy i read kuroo and kenma sdsjdksj i still wrote bokutos hcs tho so dw! thank u for this request<3

kuroo, kenma and bokuto having a talkative fem s/o.

—kuroo tetsurou.

so when you and kuroo first started dating

you guys were kinda nervous at first but thats natural for a new couple

after a few weeks though, you guys began opening up quicker and more comfortably with each other

communicating became much easier as well when you both learned each others love languages through lots of trial and error 💀

then came this time where

it was as if

your soul had switched with someone elses

because kuroo knew the type of person you were and what you were like

but that was not what he felt when he saw you excitedly chatting away with your friends regarding some movie that came out last week

(you guys are also laughing HYSTERICALLY with each other and omg kuroo has never seen that big of a smile on your face EVER)

kenma had to poke his sides to bring him back to earth cus dude was just that shocked

“KENMA WHAT WAS THAT FOR??-?-?-?1?1”

“you’ve been staring at y/n for a socially unacceptable amount of time, you look like a creep.”

“OH! HEY KUROO YOU’RE ON LUNCH BREAK”

oh my god. kuroo would think at first. who WERE you???

he realised that maybe all this time, the reserved and quiet you may have just been the first layer of your personality, maybe you just needed the time to adapt to the changes?

and so will kuroo lmao

“KUROO KUROO HAVE YOU SEEN THIS NEW MOVIE” “WE SHOULD WATCH IT” “ITS ACTUALLY REALLY NICE AND”

“y/N??? DO YOU NORMALLY SPEAK FHIS MUCH???” he was so used to seeing your calm and relaxed composure

and now that you looked like the epitome of chaos, he felt so cheated that he wasn’t able to get you to be like this in the first few weeks of the relationship

“YEAH!!! but MAYBE im on a SUGAR RUSH right now IM NOT ENTIRELT SURE BUT”

kuroo is just watching you speak, this dumb smile on his face as the truest form of you flourishes in front of him

he’ll start acting like a parent at some point because YOU ARE CRAZY MAAM

“y/n stop yappin’ and EAT” “WAIT WAIT LOOK AT THIS TEASER FOR THAT NE-”

he’d deadass shove a whole onigiri in your mouth just to tease you for a bit

he also likes that he can make jokes and make you laugh louder than before

hes just so happy to see this side of you 🥺

—kozume kenma.

kenma is going to be SO SHOCKED

ngl he’d probably look at u with his brows like >:0 “where did u take my girlfriend!!! where is my girlfriend!!!”

and you’d be in this happy mood so you are PEAK chatty right now so you’re laughing at kenma’s face cus 💀

were your two personalities really just that different 💀💀

kenma will have to get used to your sudden outbursts of excitement conversations every now and then

boy has NO idea what triggered you into switching personalities

but i guess kuroo helps him connect the dots and hes like oh and then hes like oh :D because its a good thing that you willingly act like this in front of him

esp without feeling embarassed or anything hes happy you’re comfortable

its also really cute when you suddenly feel like youre rambling too much

your arm would cling around kenma’s and he’d listen to you ramble about this new netflix show that was released a few weeks ago but it was totally cliche so you told him how the entire internet made fun of it

then when you turn your head to look at kenma, hes just looking forward and you’re like “sorry, rambling arent i?”

“its not a bother,” he’ll say, sliding his fingers to wrap around yours. “if you want we could watch it together for the fun of it”

and thats literally what yall did and oml is kenma glad to see the chaos unfold in front of him

(you were not wrong when you said it was cliche, kenma almost puked at how cliche it was lmfao)

he’ll defs poke fun at the way youre loud just around him and your closest friends but when youre with other people youre just crickets

sometimes when hes playing, you’ll watch his screen and suddenly start braiding his hair

and boy does he have some silky locks despite all the bleaching

then theres another situation where hes playing and you’ll be right beside him, commenting and yelling when they’re in a danger zone

“KENMA IF YOU STAY THERE YOURE-” “I KNOW I KNOW IM TRYING TO GET OUT” “QUICK!! YOUVE ONLY GOT 10 SECONDS LEFT”

“pft kenma you got your girl over or sth? we can hear her” an online friend is gonna say and kenma’s JUST BLUSHING AND STUTTERING, TRYING TO EXPLAIN

you can hear kuroo’s hyena laughter through kenma’s headphones 💀

and since you got to see kenma stumble all over his words and act like a nervous trainwreck, it was overall a very enjoyable experience for you

“sooo when are you gonna play again?”

HES GOING TO PINCH YOUR CHEEKS AS A PUNISHMENT

but you like it cus kenma does this cute nose scrunch whenever he pinches your cheeks

and ever since you’ve shown kenma this side of you, the teases between you and him have been endless

you both make sure never to go too far with the jokes tho! so alls good :)

—bokuto koutarou.

bo would prolly be so confused at first like yall know that one ep where hes up against karasuno for that summer training camp and hes just (°_°) YEAH

he’d be like that for the first five seconds before shit clicks

“Y/N!!! Y/N!!!!” “KOU!!! KOUTAROU!!!!” and cue the big couple hug

and every other third year is like 💆🏻‍♀️ here they go AGAIN

and akaashi is literally holding bokuto’s hotdog he literally threw in the air

“A- AKAASHI DO YOU SEE THIS” “yes, bokuto-san, please lower your voice”

bokuto is just 🤩 @ you and he can’t seem to take his eyes off your lips, he loves the way they move

sometimes when yall are in the same class, everyone purposely puts you two on each end of the class

just so that your vibes dont mix and end up causing an explosion

but distance makes the heart grow fonder 🥴

SO THERES LITERALLY NO DIFFERENCE

but even if you two become a lil too loud for everyones liking, they still enjoy the atmosphere you two bring

also loves to invite you and akaashi to walk home together because 🥺 the energy is just so nice

hes also glad that his girl and his best friend can speak comfortably

also rip akaashi’s ears whenever you two start laughing or yelling about some stupid puns you read out loud on the way home

now, during practises after school

the entire fukurodani vbc has to constantly remind you guys to tone down your noise levels

no, not those noise levels

but the way both of you can speak so passionately when talking about things you both have mutual interest in

there’ll be lots of jumping around and always expect the unconscious hand-holding, bo just really likes to hold hands with you

“Y/N YOU LIKE THIS MOVIE??1?2?1?-?1?” “YEAH IVE LOVED IT SINCE LIKE,,, FOREVER!!”

and obvi bokuto’s gonna bring up and ask you why and how you suddenly have so much more energy than before

and you’re just like “i’m only like that for a while 🥺” and you tell him you only start showing the way you actually act when you’re fully comfy w the person

his face softens, relieved that he can make you feel safe in his presence

hes happy that you’ve come to feel that way

so he becomes clingy for the rest of the afternoon you’re not complaining

[feverdancing]

when it rains we run, okay?

I’m cross-posting this on Archive of Our Own and Wattpad. enjoy.

Chapter Two can be found here.

Chapter One. 

It was raining again. It pounded against the buildings. Large puddles in the dirty streets already pooling up.

‘Walking to work tomorrow will be a pain’ Nene mused to herself as she watched from her small tiny apartment.

She glanced around her living room, a small dingy couch against the wall with a rectangle coffee table in front of it.

It was right next to her, and just a few feet forward, a small old tv, that barely works sits, off. It was sitting on one of those antique dressers they, her and Hanako, got at some yard sale.

Antique? She huffs with a smile forming, Hanako called it that, when in reality, it was just really old and on the verge of collapsing.

Nene looked back out the window, drawing her gaze to the street below. It was busy, as it normally was at this time. Black umbrellas rushing past each other, she tries to see if one of the many people down there is him.

This was normal.

She opened the dresser and grabbed a book sitting in it, before sitting onto the couch she tapped the arm of it, a random melody off the top of her head.

She waited for Hanako to come home,

They’d eat what he had brought home.

Hanako and she would discuss what happened that day on that misshaped couch, and she’d watch him fiddle with the tv, trying to get it to work correctly.

Then they would both go to bed in their room that’s practically a large closet.

He would mumble facts about the stars as she drifted to sleep.

And in the morning she’d go to work.

It was fine.

They were safe here.

Ama- Hanako wasn’t going to get hurt, she wasn’t either.

They were going to be fine.

The rain wasn’t going to hurt them.

Rain is good.

Rain is why they are safe.

Blinking, Nene drew her head to the door, hearing the sound of it unlocking. It opened slowly, Nene sucked some air, her ruby eyes focusing on it.

Then, a black tuff of hair appeared. Hanako walked in, placing his umbrella in its stand.

He turned his head towards her, a childish grin on his face,

“Mokke! I missed you!” Hanako beamed at her, haphazardly throwing his bags to the side and moved to her.

Nene giggled, shaking her head in faux annoyance,

“Hanako!-” He pulled her into a hug, making her squeak, “- told you to stop clinging to me like that” Nene groaned out as he held tighter.

“No!” he whined, “I don’t want to not hug you”

She manages to free an arm, and brings it to his head, ruffling his hair.

They stay like that for a few moments in silence, listening to the thundering rain continue as heavy as it had been all day. Nene’s gaze softened as she notices the tenseness oozing off of him.

“That bad of a day?” she whispers to him as she sets her hand on his neck, rubbing softly.

He nods, loosening his grip.

“The rain makes it unbearable to not be at your side, Mokke,”

Humming in agreement, she closes her eyes and leans into him.

“We don’t need to talk about it,” her voice small, barely able to hear, a tactic she has used in the past, to give Hanako control.

Nene felt the same, the uncontrollable urge to be in control, to be able to make your own decisions. Besides, when Hanako was ready, he would confide to her about his thoughts.

He nods, lifting himself off her.

He bounced back into the normal.

“Ne, Mokke, I brought noodles,” his amber eyes gleamed, “And donuts and rice cakes for dessert, how about it?”

Nene’s eyes widen at the mention of dessert, they didn’t have good-paying jobs. They were scraping by as it was.

It really must have been difficult for him to not be beside her in this weather.

She pauses, before deciding it was good to treat themselves to dessert.

Nene cheers, “That sounds nice, lets start cooking!”

Dinner was nice, they joked about current events, Kou wrote an article about the abnormal about of rabbits appearing around the city. Tsukasa was of the news because he got stuck on a lamppost, Nene briefly wonders how that boy always manages to get stuck in situations that don’t seem plausible.

The rain continued.

Nene and Hanako decided it’d be best to retire early for the night.

-

Nene Heaved a sigh as she slid her arms through her coat.

Sneaking a glance out the window to see the light rain, she shook her head.

‘I wonder how long it’ll take to walk ’ Nene thought as she zipped up, grabbed her bag and, walked to her work building entrance.

Pulling her hood over her head she made her way into the busy streets of Kagome city. It had been about 2 years and 3 months since she and Hanako ran away, leaving everyone they had loved behind. It was the only way out. After what they- no what she had done, she couldn’t bear to face them all again.

The police were going to find them eventually.

Nene clenched the strap of her bag,

Blood coated the ground, A male’s body with a kitchen knife sticking out of his chest--

Nene ripped the phone from her bag and dialed Hanako’s number. Her knees were shaking as she moved quickly, frantically trying to find somewhere away from people.

Ring

Ring

Ri-

“Hello? Mokke?” Hanako’s voice cut through the phone, her hands were barely able to keep it to her ear,

“I-” Nene stammered, gasping for air, “Fuck, I-”

“Mokke? What’s going on.”

She shook her head violently, taking notice that the rain was falling harder,

“I can’t Hanako,” inhale “I’m sorry,”

“Where are you?"

Exhale

She stiffened. Her eyes darted around her, taking in where she was.

The rain was unbearable.

“...park… near my work.”

“Breath for me, I will be there as soon as I can be,”

Click.

The phone slipped from her hands, she barely managed to catch it before it hit the ground. She pulled it tightly to her chest, screwing her eyes shut. Nene took a deep breath, before looking around her.

She needs to find somewhere dry.

Spotting an abandoned bus stop, inhaling she walks to it and sits.

Nene shivered, looking up towards the gray skies.

The weather report said it was supposed to be light showers, not thick and heavy rain. It wasn’t supposed to be like this, she was supposed to be composed, collected, calm.

She messed up. Once again. Her ruby eyes filled with tears, watching the rainfall.

Yashiro Nene never liked the rain, it was always dour. Back in middle school and high school, she’d groan when she saw the rain, it meant she couldn’t work on her plants.

Ao-chan tried to comfort her, saying that it was good, the plants were being watered. And yes- that was true, she still could rid herself of the irritation the rain brought to her.

Amane and her would study together at his house on those days.

She’d moan and bitch about how she hated math and science and that she’ll never be able to wrap her mind around it. Amane would encourage her to at least try, and then promptly tease her. Making jabs at her unnaturally thick ankles.

She remembers that Tsukasa, without fail, always barged in to bug the two of them. He had good intentions, he didn’t want them all cooped up and grumpy just because of the rain.

Amane hated the rain because he couldn’t see the stars.

He’d always be mopey when she’d have to leave for the night, His dad driving her home. His mother had always made the best donuts, more accurately, the best desserts. She and Amane have always had a sweet tooth, didn’t they?

Now she doesn't like the rain for a different reason. It was raining the night she-

The night she had killed that boy.

It rained the night she and Amane made their escape. Too many questions, too much on the line.

Nene tensed up, hearing steps walking towards her

“Mokke? Are you okay?” Hanako’s voice broke through the rain.

Nene raised her head, her hair gently swinging, as she looked up at him. Her eyebrows furrowed slightly and tears in her ruby eyes,

“What am I… doing wrong, Hanako?” she whispered, remorse flooding her voice.

Hanako stood, silently watching her, his head tilted down towards her, and shook his head.

She released a shaky sigh, her hands gripping tightly onto her skirt.

Inhale

Exhale

Inhale

Nene tightly shuts her eyes. And shakes her head sharply.

“Please, Amane…” she trails off, choking on her tears

The mention of his name, his real name, makes him tense. He grits his teeth, grimacing at her before he sits down on the bench beside her.

He was always weak to her. Bending to her every wish and request. Completely and aware of his love for her.

Hesitating, he watches her trembling before he sets his hand onto her shoulder, pulling her into his chest. She sobbed onto his navy trench coat. Gripping to it, trying to tug him even closer.

“Nothing, ” Hanako mummers softly, Nene barely hears it through the loud rain and her gasps for air, “You did nothing wrong, you only did what you had to, Mokke,”  Her new name, sharp coming from his mouth

Almost like he was… reminding her.

Nene froze, opening her eyes and looking at Hanako panicked,

“Hanako, ” her voice wobbled out, as aggressively pawed at her face, wiping her tears,

“I’m- I didn’t mean to slip up-” she squeaked out as his hand squeezed her twice,

Her ruby eyes stared into his amber ones, his glare softened. A small teasing smile forms,

“Mistakes happen, there’s nothing we can do but move forward, right, Mokke?”

Fervently, Nene nods her head, her eyebrows furrowed.

“Are you done crying,” Hanako asks softly, raising his hands to cup her cheeks

He rubs them with his thumbs, wiping the last of her tears as she nods her head with a small, albeit sad, smile.

“Let’s go home, and get you cleaned up starlight,”

[lordrethandus]

Daily Writing Challenge 2021 Day 10

Sleepless ( @daily-writing-challenge​ )

World: Warcraft

The gangway stretched out over the pier before dropping onto the wooden platform with a heavy smack. A chorus of footsteps rocked the old galleon as a hundred Kaldorei stepped out from the darkness. Still covered in the ashes of their beloved home, and kin, they shuffled down the gangway with barely a word spoken among them. Stormwind residents gathered to stare at the latest batch of Teldrassil survivors corralled down the docks. Displaced, starving, and in mourning, the Night Elves kept their eyes on the ground, their voices in hushed whispers, and their faces soaked with dirty tears. All but the Tideclaws.

Sayuune looked no better off than the rest of them, but she kept her head held high. A month at sea didn't do her any favors; it had been days since she had access to drinkable water, and nearly a week since she had something solid to eat. Her exhausted eyes were bright with hard headed determination, and her face was as still as stone, yet she staggered and stumbled with every other step.

Her daughter Nodas was faring better, but not by much; her stomach growled loudly and often, while her hungry gaze was fixed on the bands of mercenaries and sellswords who otherwise ignored the flood of incoming refugees. They went about their business in gilded armor and glimmering steel, with swollen coin purses swinging freely from their waists. Surely a few of them wouldn't notice if some of their riches went missing.

"Hello! Hello hello!" Humans descended upon the shuffling crowd pushing or pulling large empty carts. One such creature approached Sayuune and Nodas with an uncomfortable twinkle in his grin. The opulent rings adorning his hands could only mean one thing - merchants seizing an opportunity to prey on the less fortunate. "You need gold! I need moon elf items my collection! We trade be happy!" His Darnassian was awful, but clear enough to understand. Sayuune saw other refugees trading in what little rags they had for copper and silver coins, desperate for a bite to eat and drinkable water.

The last thing Sayuune wanted to part with was her bramblestaff; not only was it a priceless family heirloom, it was one of the only things she had left of her husband. Reluctantly she raised the staff for the merchant to inspect. "How much will this get me?"

"Mom?!" Nodas hissed, her eyes flaring. "What are you doing?!" She squeezed her daughter's hand to get her to quiet down.

"We need food."

Unsurprisingly he ripped them off. A staff easily worth thirty thousand gold was traded for less than three. "What choice do I have…" When they reached the front of the line, Nodas was relieved to find a fellow Kaldorei sitting behind the desk, but Sayuune wasn't so easily pleased.

"Ishnu-alah, sisters." His dull yellow eyes scanned them both with a most unusual scrutiny. "My name is Lieutenant Armin Ashquiver. I'll need your names."

"Sayuune Tideclaw and Nodas Tideclaw." The mother proudly stated; they could take her home, her belongings, even her family, but their names would forever be theirs. He scribbled down their names in silence, adding them to the long list of poor displaced souls now forced to live in this strange and hostile city.

"There's a soup kitchen at the camps you'll be staying in. Courtesy of His Majesty. That should hold you over for the night... but don’t expect much. Most of the crops are headed straight to the warfront." He looked up at Sayuune. "Plenty of jobs out there for a steady income, but they're filling up fast. I know you're tired, but I'd recommend looking before nightfall." He pulled out a piece of paper and planted a red stamp on the bottom. "Enjoy your stay in Stormwind City."

The goopy slop poorly masquerading as soup was a grievous insult to the Kaldorei people, but it was still the best meal she's had since Teldrassil. Nodas ate more than her fair share and fell asleep before their tent was even made, but that hardly mattered to her mother; she was just happy her daughter was finally resting. Sayuune, however, couldn’t rest. Once the tent was built around her snoozing daughter, she departed to the streets of Stormwind to find work.

Shop by shop, street by street, she was hit with disappointment again, and again, and again. Day in, day out, sunset to sunset.

"Sorry we're not looking for applicants right now!"

"I'd love to give you a job but I'm full already!"

"I can't hire you right off the street!"

"A buddy of mine across the city might be interested in extra help."

"Sorry, but we can't - what will my wife think hiring a woman like you?"

"Can't hire an elf around here. I got my reputation to uphold… you understand, right?"

"Yeah babe I can hire you, heheh… how much for the night?"

"You're filthy! Beat it vagrant!"

Two weeks of searching. Two weeks of asking. Two weeks of nothing.

Every time she was turned away, the fake smile and forced persona was whittled down. Nightfall came and went, leaving her exhausted in the Mage Quarter courtyard. Her feet were screaming for rest and she could no longer ignore them; she found the nearest bench and almost collapsed onto it with a well-earned sigh of relief. The gold she earned selling her most prized possession was almost all gone; determination was turning into desperation, and if she didn’t find work soon, her daughter would begin to starve. For now her search would have to be put on hold until the shops reopened in the morning.

A woman eased herself down onto the bench beside Sayuune. Her fragrance was alluring but she couldn't recognize the scent, her silk clothes looked as expensive as the jewelry covering her hands and fingers; her painted nails were quite long, almost impractically so. She made Sayuune feel like a vagrant more than anyone else she's met in this abysmal city. "Hard time finding work?" The stranger asked with a seductively soothing voice. Sayuune was compelled to meet her gaze, but her words caught in her throat the moment she was confronted by her striking beauty; if she wasn't a Highborne, she could fool Sayuune.

"I…" Her timid mutter stirred the stranger to smile, her dark purple lips grinning from ear to ear.

Sayuune didn't notice the woman's hand until her nails traced the base of her chin. "Stunning, aren't I? There isn't a man alive that can resist my delectable charm. The dead ones aren't immune to it either." Sayuune wanted to pull away from her grip, but she felt paralyzed… mesmerized. "But look at you… these high cheekbones… these full lips… these glimmering eyes. You're quite the looker yourself, honey. How long do you plan on wandering these streets like a beggar when you can rule the underground scene like a queen?"

"What… do you…" It was difficult to speak when she gazed into her eyes, almost feeling like she was lost in a sea of swirling quicksilver.

The stranger's smile only grew. "I want to help you get back on your feet. I help run a little organization that's in serious need of gorgeous and flexible women like us. Interested?"

"An escort service?" That was enough to pull Sayuune out of her trance to rise to her throbbing feet. "I can't do that. To even approach me like… I can't. I have a husband I'm waiting on to return from the war… a daughter that looks up to me…"

"A shame." Her tone suddenly changed, as did the frigid expression on her face. "While you wait on your doting man, you and your daughter starve." She rose, towering over Sayuune in her jade heels. "Should you come to your senses, seek out the ugliest worgen you come across in Old Town." An uncomfortable grin spread across her lips. "Tell them Momma sent you." Before Sayuune could speak, Momma tossed a coin purse at her chest. "That's how much my girls can earn in a night. Sleep on it."

Sayuune watched as the elegant woman turned and strode off, presumably to another potential recruit. She waited until she was gone before opening the coin purse. "Impossible!" Her eyes went wide. "Three hundred gold?! She's lying…!" With that kind of income most of her problems would be over. Her and her daughter would eat better than they ever did; her husband would bring back two to three grand every two months… she could out earn that within weeks! Within days!

"No…" Sayuune closed her eyes and shuddered. "To betray Vilaron like this… I couldn't! How could I look him in the eyes if I… sold my body...?"

The journey back to the refugee camps was unbearably long. Her imagination played cruel games by asking her questions she didn't want the answers to. "What if Vilaron doesn't make it back in time before we starve to death? What if this woman already approached Nodas? What if she is being used by one of her 'clients' at this very moment?! What if she refused and they killed her?!"

Sayuune ignored the burning ache in her feet from sprinting back to the camps, darting through alleyways and ducking through corridors to get back to her daughter as quickly as possible. The soft glowing campfires down the hill only hastened her steps until she was almost gliding down the path to reach her tent.

She swung open the drape with an audible gasp, and her fears were put to rest; Nodas stirred in her hammock and mumbled under her breath, her feet blackened and calloused from wandering the streets as well -- yet her face was still wet with tears from crying herself to sleep. As Sayuune caught her breath and quietly approached her, she noticed the crumbled scroll still in her grip. Gently she wiggled it free from Nodas' hand, pulled it taut between her fingers, and read the distinct Darnassian letters neatly sprawled across the parchment.

To Sayuune Tideclaw and Nodas Tideclaw,

I regret to inform you the Sentinels recovered the body of your husband/father Vilaron Tideclaw. He will be delivered within the month so you can send him off properly.

Elune will grant us justice.

-L. Armin Ashquiver

Sayuune only made it halfway through the letter before she was blinded by her tears. The shock of this news hit her in waves, crashing against her composure like the tide against the cliffside; she wanted to scream at the top of her lungs, wishing he left with them when Teldrassil burned. Wishing she could go back in time and save him.

Wishing she was dead.

Yet Sayuune endured - she had to. With a sharp inhale and a weak sniffle, she swallowed her anguish for her daughter's sake, stepped out of the tent, and wrapped her arms around herself. Others receiving similar news took it worse than she did; their screams carried across the farmland and over the pointed tents, filling the air with sorrow so palpable she could taste it every time she licked her lips.

Nodas is all she has left of her beloved Vilaron. She is willing to die for her, now more than ever; if she can lay down her life for her daughter, surely she could lay down her dignity as well. What choice did she have? “What choice do I have...” Every day she spends wasting her time looking for honest work, her daughter goes hungry. "For Nodas… no price is too great…"

With a slight grimace on her face and a shiver up her spine, Sayuune braced herself for the hardship she would endure in the unknowable future.

[wtnrscap]

Cursed Words- Benign

Pairings- Bucky Barnes x Reader, Natasha Romanoff x Bruce Banner, mentions of past Natasha Romanoff x Clint Barton.

Summary- An attack, a rescue, a recovery... a plan. It’s time to active Project Cursed.

Warnings- (18+) Mentions of blood, death, injury detail, PTSD, panic and anxiety attacks. Swearing, fluff. Dirty talk, dirty fantasies. Eventual smut.

A/N- I think I’m getting back into a flow after college and writer’s block. Again, I apologise for letting the block get kinda out of hand. I’d resigned myself to reblogging other people’s work and writing one crappy line a day. Decided I have to get myself in order. Sorry if mess up the language parts in this and as for the brainwashing explanation, this what I think happened, although I know it’s not.

Also, I’m kinda sad. This series is starting to wind down and don’t wanna say goodbye to this blushy/cocky Bucky I’ve created. Ah well, all good things must come to an end. Taglist is open. Requests are open. Prompts list here.

Ne govori - Don’t talk (Russian)

Cursed Words Masterlist

“Bucky...? Just put her down... No one has to get hurt...” Steve whispers, taking a slow step towards the edge of the compound roof. A very pale Sam follows and you gasp for air, your feet dangling as Bucky’s grip tightens on your throat.

Steve turns his head back to Sam, “You might wanna get in the air. It’s looking likely she’s gonna drop, and if you could catch her...”

“On it,” Sam jumps up and swoops like his namesake, getting an eagle-eye view of you hanging by your throat, Bucky holding you, Steve advancing towards Bucky and the rest of Avengers minus Tony and Thor watching at the bottom of the compound. He supposes they hope to break your fall as well.

“Y/N, are you okay?” asks Steve carefully, trying not to alarm Bucky. You let out a strangled noise, “Yep. Just dandy. Can’t breathe but I’ll be fine.”

“Can you wriggle free? Sam will catch you, I promise...”

“He has by the neck with his metal arm!” you snap, “I suppose the positive is, he hasn’t killed me yet...” you try to hit Bucky with your hands. He growls and his grip gets impossibly tighter, “Ne govori!”

How are you not dead yet?

“What did he say?” gasps Steve and you force a snort, “How the fuck would I know? I don’t speak fucking Russian! Don’t happen to have a plan do you?”

“Working on it...” mutters Steve raising his shield. Bucky moves his head closer to yours, “NE GOVORI!”

“Steve, I think I have a plan... Tell Sam when he gets the signal, he needs to catch me...”

“Is it a stupid plan?”

You nod your head and swing forward, trying to create enough momentum to reach Bucky’s face. He holds you fast, and for a brief minute, you don’t think you’ll reach him. Then, you swing your right arm up into a hook punch, your fist crashing into the side of Bucky’s face. Being a supersoldier, Bucky can take a punch to the face, but you have the element of surprise, a feat which works to your advantage. Bucky’s hand leaves your throat and you plummet to the ground, the sound of rushing air filling your ears. You can vaguely hear Sam screaming, “I THOUGHT YOU SAID SHE’D GIVE ME A SIGNAL!”

Fingers brush against fingers before a hand clasps around yours and a cracking sound snaps through the air. Sam yells and loses his grip and you hit the ground with a sickening crunch.

-

Disconnected voices warble through your ears. Dull pain shoots across your body in spasms and the sound of someone screaming cuts through your head.

Why won’t they shut up?

It takes you a minute to realise. It’s you. You’re the one screaming.

-

“She’s waking up!”

“Stand back! Let her breathe!”

“I think some of us should leave... Sam, leave!”

“Why do I have to go?”

“Because you didn’t catch me...” you grumble weakly, opening your eyes to too bright light and several blurry figures. The light dims slightly and Steve comes into vision with a small smile, “Is that better? I can dim it more if you want?”

“That’s good, thanks...” you groan and shift, trying to sit up. A hand grabs your arm, “Here, let me.”

In a more upright position, you can see everyone. Nat stands by the door, her head resting on Bruce’s shoulder, Sam and Steve are by the window and Tony sits next to you, having been the one to help you up. Sam steps forward arms outraised, “In my defence, when Bucky let you go, he didn’t just drop you, he kinda threw you. When I caught you, the downward force was too much which is why I dropped you and why I now have this”.

Sam waves his right arm in the air which is covered in a cast. That explains the cracking noise when he grabbed on to you. You sigh, “What is it?”

“Broken wrist. I’m not implying your heavy or some shit, just--”

“I advise you to shut up now”.

The whole room chuckles and you turn to Steve, “Is he okay? What happened?”

“I’m not sure this is a conversation we should have now...”

“I wanna know. Tell me”.

Steve sighs and takes a seat at the end of your bed, “When Bucky dropped you, he turned on me. We fought and I ended up smacking him around the head with the shield. Hard. He woke up about 3 hours ago and has been trying to convince Tony to let him go back into cryo”.

“I’ve told him to wait for you. It’s pissing him off, but I refuse to let him go back in without talking to you first,” Tony reaches for your hand and you grasp it, “Thanks, Tony. That means a lot--”

Your voice cuts out and Steve nods his head quickly, “Oh, and you’re not supposed to do much talking. Bucky damaged your vocal cords.”

“So I came out fairly unharmed?” you croak. Bruce shakes his head, “The anaesthetic will wear off in about an hour. That’s why you can’t feel any other injuries”.

“What?”

“The final injury count stands like this. Damaged vocal cords, reduced talking. Severe bruising around the neck, don’t move your head too much. Several broken fingers on both hands, reduced activates involving your hands, internal bleeding, don’t move about fast and... a broken leg, no walking for 6-12 weeks,” Bruce finishes with a wince when he sees the fury in your face. There’s a pause and then you begin to laugh. Everyone stares at you like you’re crazy. Eventually, you manage to choke out some words, “That’s damn good anaesthetic!”

Bruce flushes, “Similar to the one they use for me. You were kinda screaming a lot.”

You look around the room and a small smile spreads across your face, “Well, we have no time to waste. We have a lot to do and--“

Steve cuts you off, “You have to recover!”

“And I will recover, but I need to talk to Bucky, obviously, and I need to talk Tony. Both in private. Can you give us a minute?”

The room grumbles as people start to leave. You tap Tony’s shoulder, “Grab me a glass of water and a whiteboard?”

-

“Alright, what do you wanna talk to me about?” Tony asks, handing you the water and the whiteboard. You take a sip, soothing the pain temporarily, “We need rush Project Cursed.”

Tony’s face twists, “Oh no. No, no, no. Project Cursed is far from being ready. We can’t rush it.”

“Before Friday, I spoke to Princess Shuri. She thinks it’s ready, and she’s the best.”

“I’m offended.”

“Tony, the only reason we haven’t started Project Cursed is that I wanted it to be as painless as possible for Bucky. That isn’t going to happen. The more time we waste, the stronger the soldier gets. One of these days, he’ll take over completely. We have to move it forward.”

“But Bucky will never agree to it. And we have to take brain scans. That’ll take weeks in itself.”

“It would’ve only taken weeks because we wanted a full scan. We’ll have to a skimmed scan.”

“But we could miss something important!”

“That’s a risk we have to take Tony!” you begin to cough and Tony jumps up, handing you the glass of water. As you drink, Tony sighs, “Alright, alright. I’ll get the scanner set up with Bruce and you can talk to Bucky. We’ll do some scans and talk to him about the project. How does that sound?”

You manage a weak thumbs up and Tony smiles, dropping a light kiss to your forehead, “You’ve got a good heart Y/N. Don’t talk too much”.

-

Bucky sits as far away from you as physically possible. He doesn’t look at you, opting to stare at the wall instead. You’d tried to talk to him when he walked in, but he’d just ignored you, so now you’d been sitting in silence for 5 minutes. You sigh in annoyance, “Bucky, we’re talking abou--”

A cough overwhelms you and you blindly reach the glass of water. The glass is inches from your fingertips and you curse Tony for putting it too far away. Panic sets in as your throat is ripped to pieces when a hand rests on your back, helping you to sit forward and take a drink. You gulp down the water, ignoring the slight burn.

Bucky puts the glass back and wipes a strand of hair out of your face, “You okay, doll?”

“Oh, are you talking to me now?”

“I’m not about to let you die!”

You glare at him and Bucky shrinks under your gaze. Almost immediately, he jumps up, leaving your side but you grasp his wrist, “Where do you think you’re going?”

“I... I can’t be around you right now...” he whispers. You shake your head and pat the space beside you, “Bucky... Last night was my fault. Clearly, I said a word, one of those horrible words. I wanted to talk to you about a plan to fix all that.”

“I’m not sure it can be fixed... I almost killed you...”

“Bucky, when I took these,” you pull the dog tags out from under your hospital gown, “I knew what was I was signing up for. I have seen you at your worst and I know, the best is yet to come. I want to get these words out your head, but you have to trust me and work with me. Please... I’m begging you...”

Bucky looks into your wet eyes and sighs, sitting next to you, “Fine. Tell me about your plan.”

-

Tony hands you another scan, and you trace your finger across the sheet. It alarms you, what you see. You always knew that Bucky’s brain wasn’t going to be the same as everyone else’s, but this... this was worrying. You glance up at Tony carefully, “I’m assuming you noticed this straight away.”

“I’m not a doctor... But Bruce pointed it out to me... Then Helen looked it over and we ended up sending it to Shuri. We’ve all come to the same conclusion.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose and glare at Tony, “Do you understand now? Why we can’t wait?”

“Yes... I’m sorry for doubting you.”

“Realistically we need more scans. Scans for when he’s sleeping, but the physical evidence will have to do...”

“Care to let us in on the secret?” Steve’s voice cuts through yours, interrupting your harried whispers with Tony. You nod your head and Tony moves to stand by the window as you lift a scan and point at it, “This is the area of the brain where the words are stored. At night, Bucky is at his weakest, that’s why he has so many nightmares. If we took sleeping scans, we’d probably see increased hyperactivity here.”

“So why are you so worried about his scans for when he’s awake?”

“Be quiet and you might find out!” you snap, “During the day, this area of the brain is usually dormant. But from these scans, we can see that it’s not as benign as we thought. There is increased hyperactivity during the day and-- Bucky are you okay?”

Bucky nods his head, clenching hard, “Just having an internal battle with the devil. Continue, by all means.”

“Right... uh... There is increased hyperactivity during the day which means that the soldier is taking over more frequently. Um...On Friday, when Bucky was with me, he was relaxed and enamoured, meaning he was at his weakest and the soldier was able to take over easily. As time goes on, it’s becoming less about the words, although they are still the core problem”.

“So what do you suggest?” asks Steve, biting his lip. You look at Tony and he stands, “Project Cursed...”

“Which is?”

“A Hydra-inspired Avengers-modified treatment.”

“Hydra-inspired? What the hell?”

“Hydra wiped Bucky’s mind. They used electrolysis, right? Electric shocks through the brain, so he would associate each word with pain, and make it easier for them to control him. He would hear a word and know he had to do what they said if he didn’t... pain. As the years went by, his body went into auto-drive, hear the words, do as they say, disobey and expect pain. Like training a dog to know when it hears the bell, food is coming, except a lot more brutal,” you explain, “We want to do a similar thing. Small electric shocks through the brain, someone says the words and associates them with something nice. He’ll be able to learn not to expect pain from hearing the words.”

“And what about the soldier?” asks Bucky, his face pale. You smile, “The electric shocks will be fed directly into the storage area of your brain, hitting the soldier. As you get better, the soldier should begin to disappear and, when the treatment is finished, he should be gone completely. We’ve had the green light from Shuri so I’m confident this could work. Although it won’t happen overnight. It’s going to take weeks, months, maybe even years. I can’t pretend it won’t be painful for you either. But it’s the best plan we’ve got.”

Bucky and Steve glance at each other, their eyes betraying a whole conversation that you can’t hear. Then, Steve snaps, “No. Absolutely not. This isn’t treatment, Bucky, this is torture!”

“I’ve had 70 years of it, pal, what’s a few more? And this should help me, in the long run”.

“In the long run! Bucky... I can’t tell you what to do--”

“You certainly try...”

“But if you do this... I can’t be a part... I can’t help you...”

“Steve... you want these words gone from my head as much as me. I’m going to need your help and support...”

Steve looks scared and your heart reaches out to him. He just wants his pal to be free, with no more pain, and this... this could set him back months, mentally. Eventually, he sighs, “I wanna sleep on it. And I think you should too.”

Bucky shakes his head, reaching for your hand and pressing a light kiss to your knuckles, “I don’t need to. As long as Y/N can be there, with me, helping me, then I don’t need to. I have more of reason than ever to get these words out of my head.”

Steve doesn’t respond. His eyes glaze over where Bucky’s hand meets yours and the slightly visible chain underneath your hospital gown, and he knows. Bucky’s made his choice, and there’s no moving him. He sweeps out of the room, closely followed by an apologetic Tony. You turn to him, “Do you mean it?”

“What?”

“That I’m a reason for you wanting to get rid of these words?”

Bucky smiles and presses a kiss to your lips, “I gave you those dog tags in the name of love. You are my biggest and best reason. You are my hope.”

Taglist:

@indecisivedolly

[jaskiers-sweetkiss]

Half A Heart

Pairing: SHIELD!Reader x Daniel Sousa

Word Count: 2.3K

Warnings: some self-destructive behavior, vomiting, mild AoS spoilers up through 7x04

a/n: Here’s a Daniel Sousa soulmates AU I thought of at like midnight and wrote in two hours because I swear I cannot get enough of that man. Let me know what you think!

___

Everyone started out with their lives feeling kinda off-kilter. Everything felt just a little bit off, perpetually unbalanced, not quite full, and it all had to do with the heart tattooed on each person’s wrist. Or, rather, a half a heart, as it wasn’t until you met your soulmate that the heart became whole and with it the entire world shifted into place. You were a bit different. You still had the same half a heart as all your friends, but yours was white. Nobody knew what it meant. Normal soulmarks were red, a sign that your soulmate was alive and well and you’d be meeting them any day now. Black soulmarks existed as well, though they were much sadder. A black soulmark meant that your soulmate had died, all accounts said the black mark was a terrible burden to carry. However, there were no records of a white soulmark. 

Growing up you believed the white mark was a worse burden to carry, sometimes just wishing the mark would turn black. At least then you’d know your soulmate had actually existed. Instead, you had become certain that you didn’t have a soulmate, destined to walk the earth with only half a heart. 

So, you had thrown yourself into your career. You were recruited by SHIELD directly out of high school and you spent four years at the Academy of Operations, training endlessly to be a field agent. Four years of hoping that if you just pushed yourself a little harder you could forget the excitement of your peers who were meeting their soulmates for the first time, forget that you would never know the feeling of “rightness” everyone talked about. It was no surprise when you graduated top of your class. 

You were quickly recommended to a team of agents who took on SHIELD’s most dangerous assignments. It wasn’t until a couple missions in that you realized: no one on your team had a soulmate. Each of your teammates had a black mark on their wrists and they explained that SHIELD only assigned people without soulmates to the team. The organization refused to send agents with soulmates on such dangerous missions, it would be cruel. You learned the policy was similar to that of the military up until the 80s when people began petitioning to be able to join the armed forces outside of wartime. 

Some might’ve found this practice disheartening and sickening, that SHIELD was willing to send you to your deaths just because you didn’t have your other half waiting for you at home but you took it as a good thing. You convinced yourself that not having a soulmate just made you an even better agent. At least, you tried to convince yourself, but some nights you were kept awake by your longing for your other half. 

Nevertheless, you were pissed when you received your transfer notice. The higher-ups had recommended you for a different team, and with or without your approval you were leaving. You’d had half a mind to go sulk in your bunk when you arrived at the giant plane you’d be traveling around the world in but your new teammates hadn’t given you a chance. Coulson - yes Phil Coulson, as in died-for-the-Avengers Phil Coulson - had immediately introduced you to FitzSimmons, who had latched onto you immediately. 

The team file had led you to believe FitzSimmons was one person, though you quickly discovered that it was a scientist duo, Leopold Fitz and Jemma Simmons. The two were clearly soulmates. You had known without even seeing their full, red marks. They acted like two halves of a whole and for the first month of traveling with the team you did your best to avoid them as much as possible. You felt bad, but you felt worse trying to ignore the pain in your chest stemming from the damned mark on your own wrist that seemed amplified in their presence. 

At the start of your time together Simmons had been fascinated by your mark, though after inconclusive test after inconclusive test she concluded that the white mark was a mystery. Though you still didn’t have an answer, the one-on-one time with Simmons had made you more comfortable around the scientist and you found yourself not minding FitzSimmons’ presence as much. 

By the time SHIELD fell the team had become something of a family to you. It wasn’t perfect, but you allowed the love you all shared for each other to fill some of the gaping hole your lack of a soulmate left. You still felt like you were walking around with only one shoe most days, but it felt more bearable. 

You had a support system now. You comforted each other through Ward’s betrayal and Fitz’s recovery. You stuck by each other through alien cities and the discovery of Inhumans. You were relentless in rescuing Jemma from Maveth and Daisy from Hive. You were a shoulder to cry on as Daisy’s mark turned from red to black after Lincoln’s sacrifice. Your team had been there to rescue you when you had refused to leave the Framework because at least there you had a soulmate. You’d been to the future together, you’d stopped the end of the world, you’d seen way too much loss and experienced way too much suffering but you were still together, even if some members were gone. 

You were so thankful to have your family by your side as you dealt with Sarge and Izel, none of you having properly recovered from Coulson’s death and now having to go head-to-head with a man with his face. It had felt like your most difficult task yet, with Jemma off rescuing Fitz and the Shrike’s presence on earth, but you had made it out unscathed. 

Well, mostly unscathed. You had been a bit injured in the battle at the temple, and Jemma had insisted on doing a full-body check-up before clearing you for fieldwork in the 30s. Yes, the 1930s, because apparently it was the perfect time to add “traveling back in time” to your list of absolutely insane things you’ve done since you first stepped on the Bus. That’s when she noticed. 

“Uh, y/n?” Jemma spoke, the professional demeanor she normally assumed when performing medical on the team breaking to show her confusion and concern. “When did that happen?”

“When did what happen? Oh...” Your words died in your throat when you looked down to where Jemma was pointing. 

The mark on your wrist— the mark that had always been white, the mark who’s mystery you had somewhat made peace with— was now red.

“H-how is that possible?” You were scared. You thought you should probably be thrilled, you had a soulmate after all but instead you were terrified. The fear seeped into your bones and you thought you might puke.

“I have no idea,” Jemma answered honestly before sensing your distress and tacking on, “but, we’ll do some tests and try to get to the bottom of it. We never find out what the white meant, maybe this was always in the cards for you.”

The results of this round of testing felt somehow more confusing than the first. Biologically, nothing about your mark had changed and yet it was undeniably red. Jemma had tried to reassure you both by reminding you that the science of soulmarks was basically nonexistent anyway but it was clear by her panicked expression and your churning stomach that it wasn’t working. 

Entirely lost as to what was happening to you, Jemma pulled you from field work. At some point you had wondered if you were missing the chance to meet your soulmate while you were stuck in the med bay but you brushed it off. If you actually had a soulmate, would it even be worth it to meet them only to be ripped away when the Zephyr jumped again? You weren’t sure you could handle that kind of heartbreak, and you had already gone this long with a half a heart. 

When you arrived in the 50s you put up no fight when your teammates left the Zephyr without you. You had already made up your mind on the matter. However, fate, it seemed, had a different plan.

You were really just wandering aimlessly around the Zephyr. You’d needed a break from the chaos of the team’s time travel escapades and most of the team was currently fighting off chronicoms in the train below you. 

You hadn’t even realized they had returned until you had meandered into the ramp and storage area of the Zephyr and ran smack into a stranger. You thought he might’ve said something, maybe “woah” or “look out” but you couldn’t tell through the sudden pounding in your ears. 

Had you had time to think you might’ve remembered him from your freshman year history course at the Academy. But you didn’t have time because as soon as you bumped into the man you felt the undeniable need to vomit and you turned and bolted from the room. You were thankful the bathroom was where it was as you barely made it before you were spilling the contents of your stomach into the toilet. 

Then someone was beside you, holding your hair away from your face and rubbing your back soothingly as you puked. 

“Thanks, Jemma,” you breathed, your eyes clenched shut as you leaned over the toilet bowl, praying you wouldn’t start puking again. The pounding in your ears was gone but your whole body felt different. 

Jemma stiffened at your words and muttered a quick apology as she backed away. Except that was definitely not Jemma’s voice. 

Your eyes flew open as you scrambled away from the toilet, pressing your back against the bathroom wall as you stared wildly at the stranger. It seemed your brain had finally caught up with you as you recognized the man as Daniel Sousa, SHIELD agent, former partner of Peggy Carter, and the man your team had been trying to protect from the chronicoms. 

“Wh-what are you doing?” You spluttered and Sousa blushed, looking away awkwardly. 

“I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered out himself, “You were just…” he gestured to the toilet, “and, well, i t-think we’re…”

“What?” 

“Y’know…”

You did not know. You had never felt more confused in your life. This man, who you had never met before had followed you into the bathroom to hold your hair while you threw up, and his words did nothing to explain his strange actions. 

Rather than try to explain verbally, he pulled up his jacket and shirt sleeves to reveal his wrist. 

“I think we might be…” he nodded down to the full red heart prominently displayed on his inner arm.

As if on instinct, you looked down at your wrist, breath catching in your throat as you started at the matching red heart now tattooed on your skin. Your soulmark was not only red but it was whole. You suddenly realized why you felt so different: your world had finally shifted into place. 

“Oh god this has to be the worst possible way to meet your soulmate,” you groaned, slightly shocked that you were able to speak let alone joke when you thought for certain you should be crying after all the hell your soulmark had put you through. 

Thankfully Sousa laughed. “I’m just thankful to have finally met you.” 

The way he looked at you was so sincere that you swore your heart stopped right there. You stayed that way for a moment, him looking at you like you hung the stars and you wondering when death would greet you because surely it wasn’t possible to go this long without a heartbeat. 

Then he cleared his throat. 

“I’m Daniel Sousa,” he introduced, reaching out a hand to you which you took gratefully. 

“Y/N Y/L/N,” you introduced yourself. “We should probably get off the bathroom floor.” 

Daniel laughed again and your heart warmed at the sound. You clambered up to your feet before reaching out a hand to help him up, thankful to your subconscious for remembering that Daniel Sousa was an amputee and probably shouldn’t be plopping on the floor to help vomiting strangers, soulmates or not.  

“Um, I need to brush my teeth, or get a mint, or something,” you rambled embarrassedly as you stood in the middle of the bathroom, suddenly very aware that you had just vomited and not only could you taste it but he could probably smell it and oh god.  

Daniel graciously let you go and you reassured him that you’d find him when you were done. 

___

You had heard others talk about finally feeling “whole” when they met their soulmate but you disagreed. You had always been whole, but now you felt full. The constant ache in your chest (that you honestly hadn’t even realized was abnormal) had suddenly vanished. You felt lighter and you could’ve sworn the world seemed a little brighter. 

Technically it had been decades since the two of you had met but it had really only been a few months, though it felt like you had known Daniel your whole life. You supposed in some way you had, you were meant to be two halves of a whole after all. Regardless of timing, after years and years as a SHIELD agent, throwing yourself headfirst into danger at every opportunity you couldn’t imagine something as domestic as this. 

The two of you were cuddled up together on the couch of your shared apartment. Saturday night had become movie night, a chance for you to catch your soulmate up on all the media he had missed between the 50s and the present. The end credits of Monsters Inc played in the background as he leaned down to kiss you softly. You melted into the kiss, the feel of his lips on yours the only thing rooting you in reality. This moment, your soulmate, the perpetual feeling of content, was real and it was yours. 

[gravelyhumerus]

Criminal Minds College AU - Chapter 8

Title: “I may just take your breath away” / Sweater Weather AU

Relationship: Jemily

Word count: 35,604

Summary:

Penelope hacks the college. JJ pets a cat. There are three blowjobs. Need I say more?

Slow-burn Jemily college AU where they live across the hall and despite all odds, the universe pushes them together. AKA they’re silly gay babies who pine after each other for months.

Read it on AO3

Tumblr:  One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen, (bonus scene), Seventeen, Eighteen, Nineteen, Twenty, Epilogue

JJ adjusted the textbook in her hands, rolling onto her side to get comfortable with it. Behind her, was the calming sounds of Penelope’s pop music and her dancing fingertips as she typed code into her computer. 

She had only a few pages left to read, but she was having a hard time focusing. JJ’s brain kept drifting to the events of that weekend. On Halloween, they played spin the bottle. JJ’s spin landed right on Emily, meaning that they had to kiss. 

But it was not chaste. As Penelope most eloquently put it: “you two were seconds from ripping each other’s clothes off in front of us.”

JJ couldn’t wrap her head around it. 

Emily had really kissed her. There was tongue. It was not a peck to play the game; they had gone at it like teenagers in the backseat of a car at a lovers’ lane. 

It made reading her textbook difficult when she knew what Emily’s tongue felt like against hers. It made doing her essay challenging when she could remember the taste of her lips. It made doing just about anything next to impossible when JJ was desperate to kiss Emily again. 

“Did you know that it’s Hotch’s birthday tomorrow?” Penelope asked, spinning in her chair to look at JJ. 

“Wait, what?” JJ asked. She looked up from her textbook.  

“So... I’ve hacked into the college database,” Penelope said, turning back to her computer, her hands were once again typing a mile a minute. “Because of the whole thing with Reid not telling us about his birthday, the poor thing, and I didn’t want to miss anyone else’s.”

“Maybe we could do a co-birthday?” JJ mused, thinking about the logistics of that. 

“You read my mind, my beautiful sporty friend,” Penelope replied. “I’ve almost got everyone’s, just a minute.”

JJ stood up, walked over to Garcia’s side of the room. Somehow, her side of the room was cleaner than JJ’s, despite the sheer amount of things. Her desk was covered in trinkets, decorations and her wall covered in posters, art prints and photographs. JJ’s, on the other hand, had significantly less stuff, and way more mess. She was a busy girl and her desk was basically useless with all of her books and loose paper and miscellaneous things she needed to deal with ages ago. 

“Did you know that Morgan is a gemini?” Penelope asked. 

“Figures,” JJ replied, hoping that was the right response. 

Garcia had two monitors on her light, wooden desk, and a large desktop computer that she had built herself tucked underneath. On one monitor, was a file that she was slowly adding to, of birthdays written in white text on a grey background. Her own was there, alongside Spencer, Hotch, Derek….

JJ then watched as Garcia typed out Emily’s birthday: October 12. They had missed it too!

“Oh my god,” Penelope said, “why don’t they tell us these things?! How did we befriend such secretive people.”

“Wait, when was that?” JJ murmured, grabbing her wall calendar and flipping through the pages. “Oh my god I saw her that day. She was baking cookies, alone.”

“Alone?” Penelope whimpered. 

JJ thought back to that night. She had barged into the kitchen, talked all about her impending break up with Will, and ate Emily’s cookies. She felt awful. Obviously they didn’t know each other as well then, but why was she alone?

“She didn’t even tell Derek,” Penelope said, “oh that sweet summer child. Who hurt her?”

JJ always celebrated her birthday. Be it a family dinner or a full on birthday party when she was a kid, JJ was used to a fuss made about her each year. It was harder after Ros, but her parents refused to let the day pass without at least a cake and a present. 

As she befriended Penelope last year, their birthdays were filled with presents and friendship and alcohol, both girls making sure to give the other a thoughtful gift and make a fuss for the day.

Her heart was breaking that three of her new friends were about to let theirs pass without anything to show for it. 

“We should have a party,” JJ blurted. 

“You read my mind.”

JJ frankly welcomed the distraction from her circular thoughts about her kiss with Emily.

 ——— 

JJ left another store empty handed. She had first placed an order at a store downtown for a birthday cake, with three names on it which confused the baker, then began to wander downtown searching for presents. 

She had another half hour before she was supposed to meet back up with Derek and Penelope, who were at the dollar store buying decorations, and she had hoped to find something for Emily by then. 

The three of them were quite efficient at party planning, and they had to be with such a quick turnaround time. JJ had been tasked with finding a present for Emily.

For Hotch, they wrangled a bottle of the nicer whiskey that he liked, because even at the age of 21, he was somehow already an old man in his tastes. Spencer was also easy, because Penelope was working on knitting him a scarf. Apparently it was from the show Dr. Who, but JJ didn’t really know much about that besides that it was British and both he and Penelope were big fans. 

Emily was a lot harder to shop for. 

What could JJ get for her with the thirty dollars that they all had pitched in to fund her present? Not much. Especially since JJ knows that Emily comes from money. If she wanted something, she could probably just buy it for herself, right? 

It was also difficult because it would be from her. It would be a token of her affections. What were her affections? Did she want to simply sleep with her? Date with her? Be her best friend? JJ’s thoughts were a mess.

JJ had been in just about every store downtown, browsing clothes, gift stores, even a plant store in which she contemplated the meaning of getting Emily a cactus. Nothing was quite right.

She had almost given up when she wandered past a used book store. She had never been in before but always meant to. Out front was a stack of old milk crates filled with books, mostly romance novels and thrillers, and inside the window, beautifully bound antique books were resting in the display. 

A bell dinged as she walked in, and an elderly man waved at her from the counter before returning to his own book. 

Inside, the smell of old books filled her senses, mixed with the smell of apples and cinnamon and the earthy smell of all the old buildings in her college town. 

Stacked floor to ceiling were mountains of books, towering over her head. 

There were a few other patrons in the shop, some sitting and reading, others wandering the stacks, pulling out the occasional book. 

JJ slowly made her way through the maze. It was larger inside than she expected, with thousands of old books surrounding her, no matter where she looked. At times, she had to step over a pile of books in her path. 

The books were organized by topic, but within that, JJ couldn’t discern a clear system. 

She climbed the creaky staircase and pondered what kind of book Emily would like. Is buying her a romance novel too forward? JJ wondered. She probably wouldn’t be able to find one with two women anyways. 

Did Emily like fantasy? Sci-fi? Non Fiction? Should JJ get her something she’s read? JJ realized that she hadn’t read anything that wasn’t for school in ages. 

JJ felt overwhelmed. Was she thinking too hard? 

She did a double take at the window sill, realizing that the movement that caught her eye was a black cat basking in the sunlight. 

JJ reached out her hand tentatively to pet it. The cat nuzzled her hand, and began to purr. JJ smiled, spending a few minutes giving the cat much needed attention. 

The cat then stood, apparently growing bored, and ran off to investigate something or chase a mouse or whatever bookstore cats got up to. 

Where it lay was a small book. It was old, but not as old as some of the other leather bound texts in this store. Its white cover had a simple drawing of a boy, and written in a looping script: “Le Petit Prince.”

JJ smiled slightly, picking up the thin book. She leaned against the windowsill and carefully flipped through the pages, admiring the illustrations and trying to decipher the premise with her limited understanding of French. 

It seemed like it was for children, with whimsical art of a boy on a small planet, a king, a rose and a fox, among other things. She read the first few pages, about a boy falling in love with a flower, and decided it was perfect. 

It was a sign, JJ thought, the cat led her to this book. 

The cat—which reminded JJ of Emily with its standoffish exterior but affectionate personality—had clearly shown her that this was the perfect present. 

There was no price on it, and JJ worried that it would be out of her budget. Holding it to her chest, she descended the steps and brought the book to the clerk. 

“Hello sir,” JJ greated him, setting the book down on the table, “How much is this book? ”

He was seated in a comfortable looking chair behind a counter with an old-fashioned cash register. The sign on it read, ‘cash only’  and there was a tip jar in the form of a cat mug. 

“Oh this is an excellent choice!” The man lifted the book up, examining the cover. “On ne voit qu’avec le cœur.”

That was French. JJ didn’t know what it meant, only catching the word “heart” at the end. She nodded nonetheless. 

“You speak French?” He asked her. 

She shrugged. “I’m learning.” 

“This book will teach you more than just French,” the man said. “Trust me.”

JJ didn’t know what he meant, but nodded. He still hadn’t told her how much it was. 

“It’s a gift,” JJ explained, “for a friend.”

He handed her back the book, smiling at her. He gave it to her for fifteen dollars, seeming to make up the price on the spot. The black cat waited for her near the door, letting her pet him on the ears before she left. 

JJ left the door, hugging the book to her chest. 

 ——— 

Wrangling three of their friends into attending a surprise party was harder than it looked.

With three student athletes, nights during which none of them had games, or practices were scarce, so it took them until the next Friday before they found a free evening. Then, they had to go through the ordeal of convincing them to show up at Derek’s room at the right time. 

JJ felt giddy with the secret, greatly enjoying the party planning and doing something special for her new friends. On her Wednesday afternoon study date with Emily, her excitement for the party almost overpowered her nervousness with the girl due to their recent kiss. JJ caught herself looking more at Emily than her notes, alternating between imagining them kissing and imagining the look on Emily’s face when she received her present. 

By seven that Friday night, they had fully decorated Derek’s tiny dorm with streamers, balloons, and just about anything Penelope could find at the dollar store. A happy birthday sign was strung over one of the windows, with the addition of their friends' names written in marker on poster boards taped underneath.  

Their presents were wrapped messily, as JJ wasn’t particularly good at using wrapping paper. The cake sat on Derek’s desk reading “Happy (belated) birthday Emily, Hotch and Spencer!” in red icing on white cake. 

The three of them were frantically blowing up balloons and checking their phones. JJ felt slightly light headed by the time they were done. 

Hotch and Emily were coming for a “study date” with Derek, and Spencer was expecting a Dr. Who marathon with Garcia. All were supposed to be there any minute.

There was a knock on the door. 

“Get ready!” Garcia squealed, “someone’s here!” 

She opened the door, and instead of the birthday kids, it was David Rossi, who JJ had met for the first time a few weeks prior. He was 22, only a few months older than Hotch, in his first year of his masters. He and Hotch were close, and Emily and Derek knew him well since he TA’d one of their classes. 

“Rossi?” Derek said, “you came!”

“I never turn down an invitation to a party,” he said. 

“I have to admit,” Derek said, “it’s not that much of a party.“

“It’s more of a magical birthday get together,” Penelope said as she ushered him in. 

“Good thing I brought enough alcohol to make it a party,” he said. 

He pulled a very expensive looking bottle of vodka out of his backpack, and more beers than should fit in a normal sized bag. 

“I take it back,” Derek said, “this is definitely a party.”

There was another knock on the door.

“Come in!” Garcia said, picking up a balloon to throw. 

Spencer opened the door trailed by Hotch and Emily, all looking confused as they were bombarded by a dozen balloons cascading down from above and a series of hugs from the group. All were looking around with a mix of shock and happiness on their faces.

“It’s technically none of your birthdays today,” Penelope said, “Because you are all such awful private people, BUT I got the goods and figured it out. We thought we would celebrate all of you guys, and our amazing friend group, with this little shindig.”

“It’s wonderful Garcia,” Hotch said, almost smiling, “Thank you.”

“Don’t just thank me!” she said, “It was Miss Jennifer’s idea, and she got the cake. And my beautiful Derek helped me with the decorations and loaned his room, which might I say, is strangely large for a single room.”

Derek chucked, “It was my pleasure, happy birthday you three.”

He pulled Spencer in and ruffled his hair. 

“We’ve ordered pizza too!” JJ announced, “It should be here any minute now.”

“You’re too good to us,” Emily finally spoke up, after standing in the doorway with a dazed expression on her face. 

Penelope guided them in, and the group exchanged hugs and laughter, and Hotch got a very Italian kiss on the cheek from Rossi. Penelope put silly birthday hats on their heads, and took photos like a proud mother. 

After a few minutes of chatter—about the decorations, how they managed to keep it a secret, and most importantly, the illegality of Penelope hacking into their personal data on the university server— JJ’s phone pinged and she ran to the foyer to get the pizzas. 

Munching on greasy food, there was a companionable silence with the cheery sounds of the music in the background. 

As pizza wrapped up, their chatter resumed and the room filled with overlapping conversations. JJ noticed Rossi had snuck off to fish something out of Derek’s mini fridge, pouring something out into shot glasses. Then she heard the sound of whipped cream. 

At that sound, all heads turned towards him. He had three cups filled to the brim with whipped cream and he looked like he was about to burst into laughter at any point. 

“BIRTHDAY SHOTS!” Penelope squealed. 

“No way,” Hotch said, “I’m not doing one of those.”

“One of what?” Spencer asked nervously. 

“It’s not a blowjob is it?” Emily asked with a laugh. 

“A blowjob?” Spencer asked even more nervously. 

“It’s a shot, kid,” Derek assured him, “you just can’t use your hands and there’s the-“ 

He gestured at the whipped cream with a laugh.

“White stuff!” Emily said, tying up her hair into a ponytail in preparation. 

Rossi had to explain the premise several times, before it sunk in that they had to fish out the small shot and drink it all without using their hands. Reid looked at them suspiciously but he warmed up to the idea after Hotch offered to go first so he could see how it’s done. 

The older boy had definitely done a blowjob shot before, efficiently grabbing the plastic shot cup and downing it, his cheeks covered with whipped cream. 

Emily was enthusiastically buried in the whipped cream but struggled on the follow through, spilling most of the vodka into the larger cup before she drank it. 

Reid seemed nervous to get the whipped cream on his face, reeling back and wiping his cheeks then trying again. 

Eventually, Derek reached his hand into the cup, retrieved the shot and held it up to Spencer’s mouth.

“Look ma, no hands!” Morgan quipped before rubbing some leftover whipped cream on the younger boy’s face as the group laughed. Reid was laughing happily, beaming as he wiped his face. 

With the celebratory shot in their system, it was time for cake. JJ carefully used Penelope’s bright pink lighter to ignite candles on each piece for her three friends as they sang Happy Birthday to them.  

“Happy birthday to you!” They sang, “happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Hotch, Spence and Emily! Happy birthday to you!”

They blew out their candles. All were instructed to make wishes. 

As the night progressed, JJ got more and more nervous about the present. What if Emily hated it? Would she ruin the whole night? Penelope and Derek had assured her that it was a good present but what if they were wrong too?

JJ busied herself with cutting the cake, distributing pieces and making sure everyone had forks and napkins. 

Rossi, who was their unofficial bartender, was stationed near the mini fridge and passed out fresh beers when called upon. 

“Gifts!” Penelope exclaimed once they had made good work of the cake, dragging the presents out from their hiding space under Derek’s desk.

She handed them over to Emily, Hotch and Reid. 

“We all pitched in,” Derek said. 

All three looked perturbed at the fuss, murmuring “you shouldn’t have” as they looked at the gift. Spencer opened his and laughed, wrapping the incredibly long striped scarf around his neck and thanking Penelope. Aaron actually did smile at his present and expressed his gratitude by pouring them all shots. 

Emily held hers for a moment, staring at the wrapped book with an unreadable expression on her face. JJ watched, holding her breath as she turned it over, then placed it back down. 

“Will you excuse me for a second?” Emily said, her voice tight and sounding very… formal. 

JJ gulped as Emily stood, and exited the dorm, shutting the door behind her. She immediately thought that she had done something wrong.

The group looked back and forth, not quite sure what to do, as the commotion happened mid way through Hotch doling out shots of whiskey and some were already half raised. 

A moment passed as JJ thought about whether it would be worse for her to follow or leave her be. Maybe she wanted to be left alone? Maybe JJ was the last person Emily wanted to see?

She knew there was a lot about Emily that she didn’t know. Like JJ, the other girl kept a lot close to her chest. Over time, JJ had learned some details of her childhood, but not all, and what she knew didn’t look good. Maybe all of this was a bad idea? Emily might have had a reason that she didn’t celebrate her birthday. This could have been an awful plan and it would have been all JJ’s fault. 

She stood and grabbed the book, deciding to follow Emily. She slipped out the door and walked slowly down the hall, unsure of what she would even say to Emily once she faced her. Hey I just gave you a gift and you all but ran out of the room before you opened it, did I offend you somehow? Or I’m sorry?

JJ wasn’t sure what she was sorry for. She just knew something was upsetting Emily and the last thing JJ wanted to be was the cause of that. In fact, she wanted to make Emily happy and make sure nothing ever bothered her ever again. It would probably be weird for her to say that, right? 

She assumed that Emily had gone to the communal bathroom, as she left her lanyard with her room keys behind her in Derek’s room. If she had left the floor she would have been locked out. 

JJ took a breath outside the door, then pushed it open. 

Emily was standing in the bathroom that all of the girls floor shared, with its small row of stalls, old fashioned sinks and blue tiled floor. A frosted window that looked out into the courtyard. Many mornings JJ found herself brushing her teeth next to the other girl. 

Emily had her arms braced on the sides of the sink, leaning forward and looking at herself in the mirror. Her cheeks were flushed and her breathing was coming in quick breaths. 

“Em?” JJ said softly. 

Startled by the noise, Emily looked away from her, quickly pulling up a corner of her shirt to wipe her eyes. 

“You ok?” JJ asked, tucking the present behind her back. 

“I’m fine,” Emily said, standing up straight and giving her a half smile. Her posture was stiff, her smile forced.

“You don’t look fine.” 

Emily stepped back, leaning against the window sill. She crossed her arms, still avoiding any eye contact. 

JJ walked forward, slowly closing the distance. 

She leaned on the wall beside Emily, trying not to stare at her and make her feel uncomfortable. 

“Did I do something wrong?” JJ asked. Her voice sounded small in her ears. She immediately kicked herself, upset at how this might sound like she was making it all about herself. 

“No!” Emily exclaimed, shaking her head. “No. It wasn’t you it’s…”

She trailed off. 

“I’ve never had all this before. The friends and the party and the gifts. All this attention… it’s a lot.” 

She slid to the floor, hugging her knees to her chest. JJ did the same, turning to face the other girl. She didn’t want to push too hard lest Emily flee from her again.

“It’s all so nice,” Emily whispered. 

“Then what’s wrong?” JJ asked softly. 

Emily sighed and began to bite her nails. Her posture was hunched over, curled up on the cold tile floor. 

She began to speak, then stopped herself, gritting her teeth and blinking hard. She looked over at JJ reluctantly, seeming to think hard about how to answer that question. 

“I was always the new girl wherever I was,” she said. “I was never anywhere enough to make friends, real friends that is. Or have anything like all this. I would do anything to fit in and it never seemed to work.”

JJ’s heart felt like it was breaking for her friend. She tried to imagine Emily trying to be anyone else other than the Emily she knew and couldn’t. Fitting in is hard, let alone fitting into new countries and learning new languages. JJ knew she wouldn’t have been able to keep it together.

Emily shook her head, picking at the skin around her nails anxiously, JJ could tell that sharing all of this was incredibly difficult. 

“I lived in a dozen different countries and was barely  there long enough to make friends and when I did…” Emily sighed. “I fucked it up. I make things worse for people.” 

Emily buried her face in her hands, her breaths coming harder now. Her voice was shaky and quiet, almost whispering to JJ. 

“My mom was never around on my birthdays. She would leave me a present. Maybe. This year she didn’t even call.”

Emily paused. 

“And then you guys do all this.” 

Emily looked up, staring with unfocused eyes into the bathroom, JJ could tell she was thinking of someone else, some other day. She looked lost. 

JJ wanted to hold her hand, wanted to comfort her, keep her close. She was always called the mom friend, it was in her nature to try and make sure her friends were taken care of. Her feelings for Emily complicated things. If she was anyone else, she would grab her hand, no questions asked, but she felt herself second-guessing each move.  

Her actions suddenly felt like they had more weight to them. Knowing that she liked Emily made everything strange. If she held her hand, would it be weird? She didn’t know. Normally, she wouldn’t question holding a friend’s hand, hell, she’d already held Emily’s hand. 

But that was before she was gay, or bi, or whatever. Before she knew she liked girls. Liked Emily. Now, touching her felt scary, like she was doing something wrong, even if she was simply trying to be nice. 

Fighting against her anxious thoughts, JJ reached out, tugging at Emily’s wrist until her hand clasped onto hers. JJ ran a reassuring thumb over her hand. She sighed a breath of relief when Emily leaned into the touch. 

“You’re our friend,” JJ said, simply. “And we care about you.” 

Emily nodded, still not looking at her. 

“When I held your present in my hands,” Emily said, “I just couldn't stop thinking of my friend Matthew. He surprised me on my sixteenth birthday, pulling me out of some stupid event my mother had dragged me to. That was the only time I got a real birthday present before now.”

JJ hadn’t heard about this friend. Emily didn’t really talk about her past, beyond the general facts. JJ had to stop herself from prying, fighting back her curiosity in favour of letting Emily talk. 

She squeezed Emily’s hand in a gesture she hoped would be encouraging.  

“Your gift just brought back a lot of memories,” Emily said with a whisper. “Matthew basically saved my life. He was the only friend I had before now I guess.” 

She looked over at JJ. 

“I’m sorry,” Emily said, wiping at her eyes. 

“Don’t be.”

JJ pulled Emily into her, wrapping her arms around her and holding her tight. Emily let out a muffled sob and fell into her, with her head tucked under JJ’s chin. They sat like that for a while, JJ listening to Emily’s ragged breathing and JJ running a calming hand over her back. Emily’s face was buried in her shoulder, her soft hair tickled JJ’s face as she held her tight.  

She focused on rubbing Emily’s back, making patterns with her hand on top of her soft sweater. Emily’s arms were wrapped around her waist. 

For a moment, tears pricked at JJ’s eyes. Watching Emily finally be vulnerable to her, for her to share something, even if she left out details, was a lot. She blinked them back and focused on steadying her breathing, being a calm presence for Emily. 

After a moment Emily pulled away, creating some distance between them, wiping her face with her sleeve and sniffling. 

“JJ I don’t want you to get hurt,” Emily said, her voice cracking, “I just bring people pain.”

“What happened, Em?” JJ asked. 

Emily looked at her with teary eyes and shook her head. 

“You don’t have to tell me, Emily. But I need you to know that whatever it is, I’ll still be here. I care so much about you and just… like being your friend. I don’t care what happened in your past or if you think you’re going to hurt me. All I care about is us.”

“I like being your friend,” Emily said with a teary laugh. 

JJ smiled at her, pulling her into another hug. Holding her tight feeling like the girl would break into pieces in front of her if she let go. 

“Do you want your present?” JJ asked carefully, still hugging Emily. She could feel the other girl nod. 

JJ pulled back, taking the wrapped book from the tile floor and placing it in Emily’s lap. Emily carefully began to unwrap it, as if she wasn’t allowed to rip the brightly patterned paper.

“You know you can rip it, right?” JJ said with a kind laugh. “Just tear it open, it’s part of the fun!”

Emily looked at her nervously, and half heartedly tugged at the wrapping paper. 

“Harder!” JJ said, demonstrating by pulling on it and making a satisfying tearing noise. JJ assumed that the girl didn’t have the opportunity to tear open presents as a kid, and JJ wanted to make sure she didn’t miss out on that joy anymore. 

Emily laughed and tore at it, ripping the paper off and revealing the small book underneath. Le Petit Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. 

“I read this as a kid,” Emily breathed, staring at the cover reverently.  

She opened the cover and looked through the first few pages. 

“L’essentiel est invisible pour les yeux,” Emily quoted the novel just as the book shop clerk had done.

“What is essential is invisible to the eyes,” JJ translated. “I don’t really get it. I tried to read it before I gave it to you, but didn’t make much headway.”

“It’s about love,” Emily said as she flipped through the pages.

Emily slowly turned the pages, smiling down at the whimsical illustrations and murmured about it in French that JJ couldn’t quite make out.

“I could translate it for you if you want?” Emily offered.

“Is it as good in English?”

“No,” Emily said with a laugh. 

JJ beamed, happy that her gift was no longer making Emily upset. She hoped that whatever bad memories she had about birthdays were being amended with some joy from today. 

“Well then I just have to get better at French so that I can understand it,” JJ said. “I’ll need a good tutor.”

“This is an amazing present. Thank you JJ.”

They smiled at each other.

“I’ll read it to you,” Emily said, “And you can stop me and I can explain anything you don’t understand.”

JJ’s heart fluttered at the thought of Emily reading a love story out loud. Though, from what she saw it was about a boy being in love with a flower so it couldn’t be that romantic, could it? 

“Sounds like a plan,” JJ said. “Should we get back? I wouldn’t want to worry the others.”

Emily nodded, then the two of them stood up together. JJ’s legs had fallen asleep while sitting on the cold, tiled floor so she dramatically shook them out, making Emily laugh. 

God her laugh, she wanted to hear that forever. She’d do anything to keep Emily smiling and happy.

As they walked back to the party, it was Emily who took JJ’s hand. 

Maybe they could be friends. Maybe that would be enough.