#HAPPY NUDE YEAR LETS GET THAT BREAD

[s1utspeare]

Starting the year off with william wednesday. Let’s go girls

[wandering-child-rp]

“I’m sure it’ll be worth it when they arrive regardless but I do hope it doesn’t stunt you too much, darling.” Deciding to split the duties, Christine went to wash first as Erik took Aria to dress. They’d swap when Christine was somewhat ready and Aria could wait for her mother to do her hair and her father to dress.

It was the cliche things that Erik enjoyed. They tended to be the things he’d observed or read about and subsequently become reoccurring daydreams in all those years of solitude. Initially, walking in public in Paris without caring, having a woman hold his arm without thought as they talked, then a wife who he could kiss in the sun and then feeding the ducks with happy children. That one had seemed far fetched but it did occasionally rear his head. Sometimes he’d see a gentleman with children knelt at the waters edge throwing bread and how much joy it would bring them both. Aria was still a little unsure of them but he’d try again regardless.

The other fantasy Erik had was pulled straight from literature. He was always an early riser. He imagined being first in the bakery line on a Sunday morning, never one for church, he imagined still warm pastries and freshly brewed coffee being brought to bed, being allowed to kiss a sleeping beauty with a paper tucked under his arm. Letting the coffee cool and the news forgotten. He’d imagined kisses and touches starting lazy and becoming anything such. However, the reality of every part of their life was much less perfect but a lot better. He didn’t have a nude morning often but he did have happiness that came from security of no longer having to show off at every opportunity. He’d been a fool occasionally and now he could roll his eyes at his old behaviour and the amount of thought and work it took. They had freedom from money and each other. He’d even started dressed a little less ostentatiously; choosing a simple dark charcoal suit.

Yet the paper, half pushed through the letterbox called. Erik wasn’t and would never be accepted in polite society. Christine, aria, his money and position brought him some room but he doubted he’d get anything but a look of disgust without them. They legitimised him. But Erik craved his ego to be massaged just a bit. Stepping back, to see if his wife was looking, Erik pulled the newspaper silently through the letterbox, stepped into the parlour and began to siphon through to the reviews nervously chewing on his lip.

X

@wandering-child-rp

Her face turned dark at the dreadful ‘joke’. Whilst she could understand why he might joke about such things, it was his way of coping, she still didn’t like the suggestion even if it was just facetious. Christine held Aria closer when she grabbed at her face, the young woman pressing kisses to her cheek and head as she giggled.

It amazed her how innocent she was, Aria knew nothing of her parent’s inner turmoil or struggles, and that was how she wanted to keep it, both of them had so much trouble in their childhoods and they both swore that Aria wouldn’t grow up that way.

“We will get a new crib, we’ll have to use the other one for the baby eventually anyways.”

[ewritesthangs]

Halstead

Authors Note: First installment for my Sister!Halstead x Connor Rhodes series. I do hope you enjoy. I am by no means the best author on the planet. Feedback is appreciated. Also, things may not be completely accurate, for I live in NY, so laws and practices might be different. 

Plot: Shane recently moved back to Chicago to be closer to her brothers. 

Pairing: Sister!Halstead OC x Connor Rhodes

Warnings: None that I am aware of, as of yet. 

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The sun illuminates the city, alerting the patrons of Chicago that it was indeed morning. A relatively loud, heavy knock interrupts Shane’s peaceful slumber. Earning a groan from the 25-year-old.

“Unless you have an iced coffee, do not speak or enter!” She grumbles out loudly.

“Iced caramel with 5 cream and 2 liquid sugar.” A red-headed Halstead holds the coffee container out from behind the door, a grin plastered on his face. "Interview day. You excited?" Shane grabs the drink from his hands and begins to sip. "Shane?"

"I heard you. I need at least three sips of my joy juice to fully engage in conversation." Will chuckles and ruffles her hair. "I am so nervous Will." "I'm pretty sure this is just a formality. Dr. Charles was very impressed by your resume and academic standing. Like Voight." Shane had gotten a job with CPD in intelligence about a week and a half ago. Voight was utterly impressed with her resume. He wanted Shane the moment Jay started talking about her return. "This is really important to me Will." Shane states. "I know youngest Halstead. Believe me, you are an incredible young lady and you already have the internship. But you will rock this Interview." He initiated their secret handshake. "Thanks Will. I guess I love you." "Love you too, twerp. Come on. Up, get dressed. We have to be there at 7." Shane groans yet again, but obliges. Dressing herself in; a form fitting light gray top, a light gray textured pencil skirt, a maroon blazer with a small pump heel. She smooths the fabric of her blazer as she ganders at herself in the mirror. She radiated intelligence and sophistication. She puts her contacts in, applying light makeup. A nude lipstick with clear gloss accentuates her luscious lips. She was ready. "S, I'm leaving!" "Coming, coming!" She hurries down the hallway, grabbing her tote-like purse and iced coffee on the way. On the drive there, Will blasts some throwback tunes to ease her nerves. Once they arrive and the car is parked, they head inside. "SHANIE!" An excited Maggie jogs over, giving a hug to Shane. "Oh Maggie it's so good to see your beautiful face. I'm calmed down already." She chuckles. "I can't believe you're so grown up. You excited? Nervous?" With a deep breath, she nods. "You could say that." "OH, Shane. There you are. Prompt." "Good morning, Dr. Charles." "Lovely to meet you, finally. Please come with me." He leads her up to his office. "I am quite impressed with your work and history. What brings you here, well back here I should say." "Well you see, I wanted to explore my options, expand my knowledge base, and be home with my brothers. Family is very important to me." "Anything you'd like to tell me about yourself, Miss Halstead?" She takes a gulp before continuing. "You see, Dr. Charles, I have always been intrigued by criminals and their behaviors. I worked closely with them in Quantico while I was out there for college. That is why I want to study them, work with you. My brother speaks highly of you." "As he does of you." "I want to learn from you, Dr. Charles." He simply nods and writes things down. "Well, Miss Halstead, this Interview was just a formality. For records sake. Welcome to the team. You will do paperwork with Sharon Goodwin." Dr. Charles holds his hand out. She lets out a shake breath of relief she never realized she was holding. Shaking his hand, her once serious face now showed happiness and excitement. "Thank you, Dr. Charles. You have just made my entire day!" Shane beams. Daniel calls Goodwin. She comes to his office and brings Shane up to her office, where they go through the hiring/internship process, loads of paperwork and signing. Meanwhile down in the ER

The middle Halstead saunters in. "Hey Jay, are you hurt?" Worried Will asks his brother. "No. Just wanted to drop by and say hello." "See your sister?" Jay nods. "She just went up about 5 minutes ago."

Shane walks down about 30 minutes later. Her face showing no emotion. "Hey kid!" Jay walks over to her. She looks at her brothers, who are waiting in anticipation. She cracks a smile. They cheer and hug her. "Told ya!" "I knew you had it! I am so proud of you!" "Molly's tonight?" "Sure!" Jay drives her back to Wills apartment, where she changes into more comfortable attire. Still sleek, but more casual and comfortable. She goes about her day, running errands. She goes on a job to her the hospital, bring her brother some homemade lasagna with garlic bread. "Did you run here? Girl you trippin’." Maggie chuckles. "I brought some lasagna. Enough for everybody." Shane smiles and holds up her bag of food. "Includes garlic bread." "Who is that?" Connor asks Will. "My baby sister." He side eyes Connor, a silent threat made. You so much as even think of my little sister I will hunt you down. "Huh, she's all grown up now." "Yeah. Hey S! Thanks for the food." Will walks over and kisses her temple while wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "Wanted to meet everybody I didn't know." "Hi. I'm Connor." "Ahh, yes Dr. Rhodes." She looks him up and down. "Cardio-thoracic surgery. My brother told me about you." "All good things, I hope." "Eh, for the most part." She flashes him her signature grin. “I’m Shane, by the way.”

“Pleasure to finally meet you. You brother has been raving about you.”

“Yeah, he has always been number 1 supporter along with Jay and my mother.” She smiles fondly up at her brother. His smile is just as fond. “Go get some food, William. Let me mingle.” Will holds his hands up and goes to get some food, watching like a hawk.

“So, you are the intern for Dr. Charles?” Connor asks, crossing his arms and leaning against the counter.

“Why yes, I sure am. Word travels fast.”

“I overheard Will talking about it with Jay.” Connor shrugs.

“They really need to stop talking so much.” She shakes her head. Connor chuckles.

“They are very proud of you, as they should be.”

“I get that. But I want to be able to tell my good news, myself.”

“I can understand that.” He nods. “What are you doing to celebrate?”

“Molly’s.” She shrugs. “I am not big on parties or celebrations. You should come by, save me from my brothers boasting. Please!” She claps her hands together, emphasizing her want for someone to save her.

“Oh, alright. Those puppy eyes got me.”

“Thank you! Come at like 730, so it doesn’t look obvious you are there for me.”

“You got it.” He smiles a toothy smile.

Will was watching, his lip reading skills were subpar. “Hey, Nat? What are they saying?”

“I don’t know Will. Stop worrying, she is an adult. Let her be.”

“I don’t want him hurting her like her ex did.” He pouts.

“I know, and neither do I. But nothing will happen. She is not looking.”

“He is.” He grumbles.

“Will.” Nat warns.

“Fine, fine. I will lighten up.”

“Thank you.” She rubs Will’s bicep comfortingly.

[scuttling]

Vacation (All I Ever Wanted)

Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairing: Aaron Hotchner/Latina OFC Sophie Cortes Word Count: 11,425 (Broken into 3 chapters on A03) Tags: SFW, Pre-relationship, Getting together, Vacation, Dancing, Drinking, Flirting, Pining, Minor pre-relationship Morgan/Garcia Summary: The team takes a much needed vacation, and things between Sophie and Aaron heat up. Collection: Sophie Cortes timeline, 1 year-1 year 3 mo at the BAU (See Masterlist for reading order) Link to AO3 or read below!

Friday It’s Garcia’s idea for the team to go to Virginia Beach for the weekend, everyone stressed out from the work week and in desperate need of some fun. Hotch and Gideon initially decline—it sounds like a bit too much fun, a young person’s trip—but Sophie announces “if everyone doesn’t go, no one goes,” and that kind of makes the decision for them.

They pile into two cars—Hotch, Gideon, Reid, and Sophie in one and Morgan, Garcia, Prentiss, and JJ in the other—to make the three hour drive on a Friday afternoon, and Gideon calls in a favor from a friend and gets them a beautiful house on the beach for the weekend.

“So after we get settled in, what’s next?” Prentiss asks as they unload the cars, their usual go-bags abandoned in favor of normal luggage.

“Dinner! Please say dinner,” Sophie pleads, and Emily pats her on the head affectionately.

“Okay, little one, dinner it is.”

“I know a great place down the boardwalk with plenty of options for vegetarians,” Garcia states, heels clicking on the tile of the kitchen, and the plans kind of evolve from there. Everyone heads to their rooms to change from work clothes to more appropriate attire, and soon they’re mostly gathered in the kitchen, just waiting for the stragglers.

Sophie, he notices (can’t help but notice anymore, and he’s come to terms with that,) looks incredibly beautiful in a silky, tropical print sundress and nude heels; she belongs in this kind of environment, salt air blowing her hair, slight flush on her cheeks. She looks like a goddamn supermodel, and it only serves to make his heart ache that much more when he looks at her.

“We should go dancing after dinner,” JJ, the last to join the group, mentions, and almost everyone agrees. Gideon grumbles something like, ‘damn kids’ as they file out of the house, and Hotch can’t help but laugh.

They find an Italian restaurant everyone can agree on that can accommodate them on short notice, and they’re seated quickly; Sophie is swiftly pacified by a basket of bread and a glass of wine, and everyone is happy, laughing, just as intended.

“What is calamari, again? I know it’s some type of disgusting seafood,” Garcia says, looking over the menu with a grimace, and Sophie returns the expression.

“Calamari, my dear, is Italian for squid.” She makes a fake retching noise, then turns to her partner. “Dr. Reid, give us a fun fact about squid.”

“While often confused with the octopus, squid have eight legs plus two tentacles, which actually makes them Decapods. The tentacles are used to grab prey and the legs are used to control it.” He smiles, looking pleased that he was asked to give a piece of trivia about something unrelated to a case, and Sophie grins back.

“Thank you. I didn’t know about the tentacles.” She tilts her head to look back to her menu, but catches Hotch’s eye and smiles.

He’s a little proud that he managed to pick the perfect partner for Reid, even if it meant the position was vacant for longer than he would have liked; he truly can’t imagine the BAU without Sophie, even if he is a bit biased now.

After dinner, Gideon retires back to the house, and the rest of them make their way to a beachside bar JJ finds with good reviews. Everyone is about two drinks in, and everyone but Hotch is dancing: Morgan and Garcia are dancing together, JJ and Prentiss are dancing together, and Sophie is doing her best to teach Reid how to dance.

“Put your right hand here,” she guides, placing his hand on her slim waist, “none of the hand-on-butt most guys prefer.”

“There’s something to be said for hand-on-butt,” Morgan shouts over the noise, and the girls laugh.

“Yes, there is, but time and place. I’m teaching him how to dance; someone else is going to have to teach him that.” She smiles up at him and takes his other hand, clasps their fingers together, and holds their arms out a bit. “Arms like this for now, or a little closer when you get closer to your partner.” She demonstrates by hovering her hand over his chest. “If they do this, they're getting comfortable, you can lean a little closer. Might even be a good time for a kiss, if you think it’s heading that way.”

“How do I know if it’s heading that way?”

“Well, social cues and body language are important. If I were you, I’d observe the other people in this room. Personally, if I want to kiss someone, I can’t take my eyes off of them leading up to it. Either their eyes, or, you know. Their lips.” Her own turn up in a smile. “If they're looking at your lips, you should probably kiss them.”

She rests her hand lightly on his arm, just above his elbow, and they take a few steps, a smile and kind words of encouragement passing her lips. “That’s good. I know you’re nervous now, but when you’re dancing with someone you really like, it will feel more natural. Like you’re the only two people in the whole world.” They take a few turns around the floor, and then switch partners, Garcia with JJ, Morgan with Sophie, Prentiss with Reid.

A bit of time passes—team members have come to the table to rest, hydrate, drink, in shifts—and then Sophie heads toward him, shaking her head with a soft laugh.

“That kid is so smart about most things, and then just hopeless about others,” she tells him as she stands at his side, taking a sip of water. “Don’t you like to dance?”

“I do, but you guys are having your fun. I don’t mind keeping an eye on things.” She raises an eyebrow, takes the beer out of his grasp and then takes his hand, pulling him to the dance floor. She catches Reid’s attention and then points to the table they abandoned.

“Will you keep an eye on the drinks, please? Hotch is off duty.” He nods seriously, hops off the stool he’s perched on and heads for the table; Hotch makes a noise of protest.

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“He’s observing, he can do that from over there. You aren’t our unit chief right now, you’re a man on vacation, and if you like dancing, you should dance.” She stops, stands in front of him, looking a little deflated. “I’m sorry. Do you want to dance with me? I’m being overbearing.”

“It would be my pleasure,” he says honestly, with a smile, and she returns the gesture. He places his hand carefully on her waist, takes her hand just like she’d shown Reid earlier; she lays her left arm along his, hand at his shoulder, and they move easily, smoothly across the floor. “Where did you learn how to dance? You seem like a good teacher,” he says softly after a moment, fearful that he’ll break the bubble they’re in if he speaks any louder.

“My aunt owned a dance studio, and my cousin Damian and I were always getting thrown in to demonstrate when she was short handed. I taught a couple classes there while I was putting myself through school.” A couple passes by them, closer than it seems either of them are comfortable with, and they squeeze a little closer together, his hand wrapping across her back, their arms tucking in.

“What kind of dancing do you do?”

“Mostly waltz, rumba, salsa. You?” He’s heard of waltz, salsa, doesn’t know much about rumba, but can imagine she looks graceful, gorgeous, when she dances it.

“Mostly just this. Do you ever go dancing back at home?”

“Sometimes. It’s hard without a partner, because guys can be creeps. They think that dancing means you have to go home with them.” He’s sure his eyes harden, thinking about what men must put her through when she’s just trying to enjoy herself, other women as well. It’s one of many things that irritates him about his gender. “I know dancing with a partner is sexy, but I can separate the dancing from the sexy. When I want to.” She glances up at him, and he’s probably imagining it, but it seems like she might be looking at his lips.

The song ends, transitions into one that’s slower, and they get a little closer, so that her hand presses against his chest, her head almost resting against his shoulder. She feels so good in his arms, smells like heaven, and he would love nothing more than to stay like that all night, but by the end of the song most of the others are back at the table, looking a little faded, and he supposes this good thing must come to an end. As if she senses the shift in his mood, she steps back with a smile.

“Thank you for dancing with me. You’re a great partner.”

“Better than Reid?” he asks with a smile, though it’s all in fun; he’s happy he got to see the youngest agent let loose for once.

“Yes. No offense to him,” she tacks on, and they both laugh softly, “but I like a man who can lead.” He wants to keep her hand in his, to lead her back to the table with their friends, to the house, to her room, but he knows it’s not wise, or even possible, so he lets her walk ahead and tries not to get too caught up in his own mind. They walk back to the house as a group, laughing and bantering as usual, and mostly everyone heads straight to bed—with the exception of Derek and Sophie, who are chatting in the kitchen and making a late-night PB&J.

“I can’t believe you got the boss man dancing,” Derek says, pouring a glass of milk to go with his sandwich, and Sophie laughs softly.

“I practically forced him to, I wouldn’t read that much into it.” He cocks a brow.

“I don’t know, you two looked pretty cozy. Dancing around like you didn’t have a care in the world.” He mimics a waltzing hold, spinning around the kitchen with his eyes closed; she laughs, a little shy, then tries to make a joke of it to hide her emotion.

“What can I say, I’ve got chemistry with everyone; it's a blessing and a curse.” He gestures between them with the hand not holding his glass.

“You and I don’t have that kind of chemistry.”

“That’s because you’re sharing all yours with Penelope,” she teases, taking a bite of her sandwich, and he chuckles.

“That’s just me and my girl. You know how we are.”

“Yes, I do: deeply in denial.” He looks at her with serious eyes, pointing at her, then himself, when he speaks again.

“Pot, kettle.”

“I’m not in denial about anything, trust me,” she replies, looking down at her plate. “I am very aware of my feelings at all times.”

“Okay, so there are feelings.” She rolls her eyes lightly.

“I’m not a robot, I have feelings.”

“For Hotch?” he asks, and the question is far too direct for her liking. She sighs.

“Even if I did, it wouldn’t matter. He’s still my boss. So don’t go trying to play Cupid or something.”

“Me? Interfere with your social life?” She scoffs, and he grins. “I’m just saying. There are ways around the boss thing, if you do have feelings for him.”

“And I’m just saying, it’s totally fine for a special agent to date a technical analyst. You don’t even need a way around it.” She shoots him a toothy, bratty smile, and he messes up her hair, earning a groan.

“Alright, enough of this talk, you’re making me tired.” He rinses his dishes, loads them into the dishwasher. “You wanna get into your feelings later, you let me know.”

“Same goes for you,” she calls as he heads down the hall. She cleans up her dishes too, walks to her room, sighing when she passes Hotch’s door. Saturday “She’s a masochist,” Garcia says the next morning, sipping a cup of coffee and looking out the open kitchen window, and Hotch has no idea what she’s talking about, but he has to find out.

He sighs when he sees, should have known that it would be Sophie, bright eyed and bushy tailed even after their late night, doing yoga in the sun on a patch of grass in front of the house. Her outfit is absolutely minuscule—a partially mesh sports bra, teeny tiny, high-waisted spandex shorts—and she’s getting lots of looks from the men on the beach passing by.

“Bitch,” JJ adds, stepping up beside them, sucking on the straw of an iced coffee. “How is she even functional right now?”

“She operates on a different wavelength than the rest of us,” he supplies, as that’s his only guess so far. He runs to stay fit for work and to relieve stress, sure, but he’s not waking up at 6 AM on vacation to do it for fun.

“I think that she feels inadequate sometimes, for being the smallest of us, and that she overcompensates by never letting herself rest. It’s also why she’s so proficient with firearms. If one of us got hurt because someone overpowered her, she wouldn’t let herself live it down.” That’s Reid, and he may have a little partner insight that the rest don’t, but his opinion is probably correct. Hotch also knows that she’s hard on herself, constantly training her mind and body so she won’t make mistakes; it’s probably something they should discuss more, now that he thinks of it.

“That’s deep,” Garcia says, looking over at Reid, and he nods, sips his coffee too.

“She’s very complex, while somehow also being the simplest person to talk to.”

“What are we lookin’ at?” Gideon asks as he sees the line of agents lined up at the window. When he glances out of it, he chuckles, shakes his head, and keeps walking. “Like the energizer bunny, that one. Makes all the rest of us look bad.”

She shifts into a position that makes it look like she’s sitting with her legs crisscrossed, which might not be difficult, except that she’s balanced on her head; Hotch can’t even marvel at the flexibility that takes, too focused on the effort she must be using to maintain the pose.

“God, what am I even looking at, here?” Morgan asks as he joins the group, protein shaker cup in hand. “And you all thought I was bad.”

“At least she’s not running. If she was running, I’d have to kill her,” JJ mumbles, and Garcia smiles.

“Oh she already ran, honey. Came back in to get the yoga blanket thingy. Said running in the sand is, and I quote, ‘such a fun challenge.’”

There are many sounds of disgust from the group, which seems to draw Prentiss out; she squeezes in between them, reaches out to take JJ’s coffee, sipping through the straw, and exhales.

“Yep, I am definitely gay.” She raps on the window, and Sophie turns her head toward them; she squints her eyes at the group, then tips over so that her feet touch the mat, rising to stand in a way that looks much more effortless than it has to be.

“What the hell are you doing, weirdos?”

“We’re not worthy!” Prentiss teases, mock-bowing in her direction and earning a laugh.

“All right, all right, I’m coming in. Freaking voyeurs,” she mumbles, folding up her blanket. “You too, Hotch?” she asks as she enters the house, walking past him, and all he can do is shrug.

“I was just admiring your form, that’s all.” She gives him a look, partially I doubt it and partially something like, I dare you, and he feels himself get a little hot under the collar.

If one look from her is all it takes, then he’s already in way over his head.

...Then comes the bikini.

It’s nothing outrageous, something simple and sporty enough that she plays volleyball with JJ and Morgan and a couple of other people on the beach, but it’s the least he’s ever seen her wear, so his mouth may water, a little bit.

And is it sad that he wishes she'd have asked him for help putting sunblock on her shoulders? Is it creepy? Regardless, she has Morgan rub it in, and then she does him, because—“as my mama says: just because you’re brown doesn't mean you can clown around.”

“Oh my god, I can already tell I will love your mom. I have to meet her.” She rubs the sunblock into his shoulders, earning playful banter from Garcia about running your hands all over my man, and yes, Hotch is irrationally jealous, and yes, he knows it’s stupid. “Anyone else need some?” She scans the group—Garcia is under an umbrella and clearly plans to stay there, JJ and Prentiss shared some cream that helps you tan faster, Gideon is already fast asleep beneath an umbrella of his own—and shakes the bottle at Reid. “Gonna take off your shirt, doc?”

“I’m gonna pass, but thanks,” he tells her, clearly a little self-conscious, and she just smiles easily.

“Okay, well let me know if you change your mind.” She turns to Hotch, then, smile still broad, runs her eyes up and down his t-shirt before meeting his gaze. “How about you, boss? Do you wanna take that off for me?” Her brow is quirked, her look again sending a flash of arousal through him, and he just shakes his head; he can’t say for certain that he wouldn’t do something very stupid with her hands on his body. “Alright. If you change your mind, my offer stands.” She turns away, and Morgan says something to her, too low for Hotch to hear; it earns him a playful shove.

They stay on the beach until late afternoon, swimming or reading, playing frisbee or sunbathing, and anything and everything in between. He takes a moment to check his work email when he thinks no one is paying attention, but soon feels a cool drop of water land on his arm; he looks behind him, and Sophie is peering over his shoulder with wet hair and a frown.

“Are you incapable of relaxing?” she asks, grabbing for his phone, and he pulls it out of her reach, so she’s forced to either put a hand on his shoulder for balance or fall. She reaches again, and they battle back and forth for it, not because he cares as much as he’s enjoying the attention. It’s childish, he knows. “Damn it, Hotch. I’m trying to… help you.” She has her arms on either side of his neck, trying to cut him off and get the phone out of his grasp, and her mouth is right at his ear when she says, “I’m going to get you to loosen up if it kills me.”

The comment is both very sweet and very tempting, and he catches her wrist, presses his phone into her palm. She disengages her arms from around his neck and sinks down into the sand next to him; she’s flushed from the little bit of exertion, and her eyes are soft when they peer into his.

“I just want you to have a good time and not worry about the BAU for once in your life,” she murmurs, pushing her hand through her wet hair. “Or you’re going to die young from stress and I’ll feel a little bad I didn’t stop it.”

“Just a little bad?” he teases, and she rolls her eyes playfully.

“I’ll feel really bad, so, just. Cut it out. Read your book. People watch. Do anything but work.” With a soft smile, she leans closer, hands him back his phone. “For me?” He looks into her eyes, wants to tell her he would do anything for her, but instead, he nods.

“Okay. For you.” Her returning smile is brilliant, and she rests a hand on his shoulder for a moment before using it to boost herself up to standing. She brushes sand off her butt, and he can’t be blamed for looking, he just can’t.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come swim?” she asks, and he blinks back into focus, shakes his head.

“Maybe later. I think I’m going to people watch,” he says, and if she is the person he chooses to watch, well. No one will be any the wiser.

“Sophie, oh my god.” She turns at the sound of her name, slipping the back onto her earring and staring at Emily with a confused look.

“What did I do?” she asks seriously. All she’s actually done since they came in from the beach was eat a grilled cheese, take a quick shower (daydreaming, just a little, about what it would have been like if Hotch let her rub sunscreen onto his shoulders), and get dressed, so there’s literally no way she’s earned the tone.

“I’m guessing you haven’t seen Hotch since he changed.” Her eyes glaze over as she imagines it—maybe he’s wearing a button-up shirt like last night, the sleeves rolled up, or maybe he opted for another thin, faded t-shirt like the one he wore to the beach…

“Uh, no, I haven’t. But what does that have to do with me?”

“You’ll see,” is all she says, grinning, and Sophie wonders for a moment if she’s actually not being that sneaky about her thing for him, and if everyone knows. Morgan’s inferences are bad enough.

She shakes the thought, because if the whole team did know about her crush, she would know about it. She’d never be able to live it down, and she would definitely know about it.

She finishes getting ready, sees what all the fuss is about when she enters the kitchen and is faced with a broad back with a blue polo stretched across it—the same shade of blue as the patterned dress she’s wearing.

She groans. They’re definitely gonna make a big deal about this.

“I say we make a break for it,” she says, and he turns at the sound of her voice, looks her up and down, and smiles crooked, gorgeous. “They’re going to make us take a picture, and I know how you hate pictures.”

“I do hate pictures, but maybe if I’m lucky, I’ll make it onto your dresser.” She takes a good, long look at his body—the polo is tight, hinting at his pecs, his stomach, and his arms look amazing—and can’t help but flirt a little.

“Are you just trying to get invited back into my bedroom? ‘Cause all you had to do was ask, Hotch.” His eyes get dark, smoldering, and then JJ and Garcia walk in, talking over each other and demanding photographic evidence.

She rolls her eyes lightly, and so does he, but he puts his hand on her back, pulls her close, and they smile for the camera. That night, they go for dinner, and drinks, but no dancing, and Hotch feels at a bit of a loss; it had been so nice to dance with Sophie, to hold her in his arms however briefly. He had kind of been hoping for more of the same.

She wears another lovely dress, light and gauzy, and blue—the same color as his shirt, which makes for a slight moment of hysteria from their coworkers—and he longs to put his hands on her waist, to see her smile, to smell her perfume.

He briefly wonders if he will ever get over wanting what he can’t have.

Hotch goes to the bar to grab a round of drinks when it’s his turn, and an attractive blonde woman about his age makes small talk, which escalates to some mild flirting; she smiles at him in a way that makes him think that, if he had been looking to spend the night with a woman, he wouldn’t have had to look very far. He’s not sure why that makes him uncomfortable.

The bartender is obviously swamped, and he’s thinking about giving up and going back to the table just to get away from the woman’s eyes, her voice, when warm hands wrap around his bicep.

“There you are, honey. I’m glad I found you.” Sophie wedges in between them, not sparing the woman a second glance, all eyes on him. “Drinks going to take a while?”

“Yeah, I think they’re understaffed. I’m sorry I kept you waiting.” He wraps his arm around her back, pulling her close, and she touches his chest softly with her palm.

“No problem. You know I’d wait forever for you.” She smiles brightly up at him, and the woman mumbles something unkind, throws down a few bills, and walks away. Sophie laughs, but doesn’t put any distance between them. “It looked like you needed a save. I hope I didn’t misread the situation.”

“You absolutely did not misread,” he assures with a shake of his head. “She would have eaten me alive if you hadn’t come along.”

“It’s a good thing I’m here, then. To protect your virtue.” She runs both hands down his chest—keeping up appearances in case the woman is watching, he assumes—and it prompts him to lean closer to her.

“I’m glad you’re here for more than that reason,” he says, however foolishly, and she sighs softly, pulls back so she’s not in his easy grasp.

“I’m sorry, I can’t…” She walks away from him quickly, and he doesn’t reach for her arm, knows she doesn't like that, but he does follow her out to the balcony. The night is warm, with a cool breeze, and it blows her hair as she looks out at the water.

“I’m sorry I said that.” He puts his hands on the railing, and she looks over at him, curiously. “I say more than I should around you, and there’s no excuse.” She turns to face him fully, arms crossed, face closed off and hard to read.

“Did you mean it, though? Did you mean it when you kissed my head and told me to let someone into my life? Did you mean it when you said you want to be here for me, and you wiped away my tears? Did you mean it when you were watching me do yoga this morning, when you watched me play volleyball in a bikini?” He opens his mouth to speak, but can’t find the words to deny it, or to help solve this problem.

“Yes, I meant all of that, and I realize now that what I thought was harmless was not so harmless after all.”

“You realize that because you know I felt led on? Or because you were just having fun and you didn’t expect me to pay such close attention?”

“You felt led on? I…” He feels his face scrunch in confusion.

“You told me I was amazing, you held my face in your hands, you pretended to be my boyfriend at the pizza shop. You came upstairs with me on my birthday and you took off my shoes and you looked at me like you wanted to kiss me. And I showed you my family, and you looked at me like you wanted to kiss me. And we danced, closer than I danced with Reid, closer than I would dance with anyone else, and you looked at me like you wanted to kiss me. This morning, I felt your eyes on me; at the beach, I felt your eyes on me. I feel them all the time, and I thought it was wishful thinking, but now I know it’s you looking.” His mouth goes dry, and he pushes a hand through his hair, feels as if walls are crashing down around him.

“Sophie, I can’t apologize enough. I’ve been behaving inappropriately for a while, and this weekend I let my guard down, and I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable.” He looks over at her, ready to see rage, or hurt, but all he sees is… hope.

“I’m not uncomfortable, Hotch. I just need you to tell me that you said and did all those things because you want me. Not because you thought I wanted to hear them, or because you felt some... I don’t know, little sister affection for me.”

“I didn’t say anything because I thought you wanted to hear it, and believe me, what I feel for you… It’s not little sister affection.” He looks into her eyes, apologetic. “I should have come to you when I realized my feelings were becoming inappropriate.”

“Hotch, I’m trying to tell you,” she says softly, wrapping her fingers around his wrist, “that it’s not inappropriate for you to want me, because I want you too.” His mind goes blank at that, the potential panic attack falling away and leaving him with just… what?

“You, what?”

“All of those things... I felt you getting closer to me, and I was getting closer to you. I was looking, too. And when you told me I should let someone in, when you told me that I should start dating again, I thought you were saying you wanted it to be us.” He takes a step toward her, wants to take her face in his hands again but resists, for the time being. “Is that what you were saying? Is that what you want?”

“I—yes. That’s what I want.” It’s all he wants, can’t think of a single thing in his life he’s wanted more, and the look on her face makes him think he might actually be able to have it.

“Then kiss me,” she murmurs, taking a step toward him. Her eyes are warm and clear, sparkling in the moonlight. “If you mean it.”

He slips his arm around her waist, caresses her cheek, and pulls her close for a deep, slow, passionate kiss. It’s everything he imagined, everything he’s been wanting, and she wraps her arms around his shoulders, pulls him closer yet. She is soft against his body, beneath his hands, and they kiss for so long he forgets about the world around them, just sinks his fingers in her hair, breathes in the scent of sunscreen and coconut shampoo, relishes the feel of her soft lips against his. It’s absolute heaven.

“I haven’t been able to think of anything but kissing you all night,” she breathes when they break apart, wetting her lips, and her hands run over his chest again. He leans in for a soft, quick kiss, pushing her hair behind her ear, and smiles down at her.

“I don’t think I’ve thought of anything else for months,” he confides, touching her chin. She smiles brightly, just like he’d hoped she would, and she puts her hands on his arms, bites her bottom lip.

“Well, I’ve thought of a lot of things. Some had to do with these arms…” Her eyes rake over his chest and shoulders, and he feels himself heat under her gaze. “Most of them have to do with all of you, though.” He groans, pulls her closer with hands on her hips.

“If we weren’t here with the rest of the team…” Her eyes get wide, and she laughs, a short sound of surprise.

“Oh my god, I forgot. I well and truly forgot about the rest of them for a second.” He thrills at that, bends for another lengthy kiss, and her eyes are dark when he pulls back.  “How am I supposed to go the rest of the night pretending I don’t know how well you kiss?” she asks, chest heaving, and all he wants to do is kiss her, repeatedly, learn all the ways her body responds to it. “Oh I know: I’m going to get drunk and hope no one notices me staring at your mouth. Worked on my birthday.”

He grins at the thought of her, then, now, drunk and looking at him across the table, watching him, and presses his lips to hers softly. Now that he’s started, he can’t seem to get enough.

“Okay. I’ll stay sober in case you need me to carry you home.”

“Mmm, why do I love the sound of that so much?” she asks no one in particular, wrapping her arms around him in an embrace. “I feel obligated to say we should get back in there; it’s only a matter of time until someone comes looking for us. But…” She trails off, brings a hand to his face and sighs, content. “I’m happy right here and I don’t want to leave this spot.”

“Me too.” He kisses her, and her fingers glide through his hair, tugging softly, making him moan. “Okay, we really better go in now, because I could lose track of everything if you keep doing that.” She smiles, like she likes the thought of making him lose his mind, and he can’t help but return the expression. “Do you want to go in first?”

“No, we can go in together. I got this, promise.” She takes his hand, presses her lips to it, and then drops it, and they head back to the table.

“Where have you two been?” Prentiss asks as they return, and Sophie smiles happily.

“Needed fresh air. Why, did you miss me?”

“Yes, but we also missed our drinks. Sent Reid for them when we realized you two had run off.” Sophie’s face falls a little, eyes a bit sad.

“I’m sorry, that’s my fault. I was upset about something and Hotch went outside with me, helped me talk through it. I’m okay now,” she adds with a brighter expression when it looks like they want to ask about it. It's not technically a lie, either. “So what are we talking about?”

“We’re talking about the craziest thing we’ve ever done,” Morgan says with a teasing grin. “Let me guess, yours is: returned a library book late.” She shoots him an unamused glare.

“Joke’s on you, I would never return a library book late.” The table erupts in laughter, and she sips at her now watered down gin and tonic. “But you’ve made your point, I’m boring. I’m sure you had a threesome with twins and JJ fought a bear in the woods of Pennsylvania and Emily followed The Cure on tour across the country.”

“I did not do that, but trust me, young Emily wishes she had,” Prentiss says with a grin and a sip of her drink. “Mine was going to a rave in Paris that was busted, running from the cops.”

“Okay I’m sorry, that’s way cooler than the Cure thing. What about you, JJ?”

“I played chicken a lot when I was a teenager. Like in Footloose,” she describes, laughing. “Probably should have died, but the dumb boys always got scared first and I won.”

“Chicken champion,” Morgan calls her, making her dissolve into laughter. “Mine was stealing a car, going on a joyride. Only time I’ve ever broken 100 miles per hour.”

“You’re all criminals, I get it now. No wonder you think I’m so boring,” Sophie teases. “You guys?” she asks Reid and Garcia. Garcia grins.

“I hacked the FBI, remember? Doesn’t get much crazier than that.”

“I went skydiving,” Reid says simply, and Sophie is surprised, to say the least. Hotch is too.

“Skydiving! Spencer Reid, you’re holding out on us. When was this?”

“When I turned 21, I wanted to do something special, so I just decided one day. I went by myself. It was terrifying.”

“Wow, I may never get over this. That is so cool.” She leans across the table, bumps her fist with his. When she leans back in her seat, she looks to Hotch with curious eyes. “Alright, I know you’ve got a story. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done?”

“I haven’t done many crazy things,” he begins honestly. “I guess the craziest would be backpacking in Europe by myself, on a whim. I’d just graduated high school and was feeling… afraid of the future, I suppose. I was only gone two months, but I did feel different when I came back.”

“Okay, that’s crazy to me. I’ve definitely never had the guts.”

“I can totally see young Hotch backpacking through Europe,” Garcia adds, and he smiles.

“It was stupid, but I met a lot of interesting people. You really haven’t done anything crazy?” he asks Sophie, who has seemed a little reserved the last few minutes, so different from the girl on the balcony.

“Nope. No crimes, no drugs, no underage drinking or fights or spontaneous trips anywhere. I went to school, went to work, went home, and when I was done with school, I went to work and went home.” She twirls the straw in her glass for a moment, and then sits up with a smile. “Oh, wait. I have something. This may not seem that cool to you guys, but walking home one day in Chicago, I saw a flyer for a band that needed a singer, so I tried out. That was pretty spontaneous.”

“Did they like you?” Reid asks, and she nods excitedly.

“Yeah, actually. I ended up singing for them for about a year before I left Chicago.”

“Okay, you were in a band for a year and didn’t think you had any fun stories to share,” Prentiss clarifies. “That’s awesome.”

“We need to hear you sing,” Hotch tells her seriously, and she gets shy, blushes, adorable.

“Ah, no. Maybe back home—my friend owns a bar, and I sing there sometimes. Karaoke or open mic.”

“I learned two things about you tonight, Cortes: you sing, and you have a friend besides us.” Sophie smacks Morgan’s shoulder, making him laugh.

“Well I prefer quality over quantity—yourself excluded.” He feigns hurt, puts his hand over his heart. “And on that note, I need a couple shots. I’m not nearly as drunk as I want to be.” She stands, puts her hand on the back of Hotch’s chair. “Want to try again?” He does, if only to spend a few minutes with her away from the group, stands up and walks beside her to the bar.

“You don’t have to do crazy things to be interesting, you know,” he tells her as they lean companionably against the bar, waiting for their drinks. “I find you very interesting exactly the way you are.” She smiles, a tender, private thing.

“Thank you. I’m glad you do. I find you interesting, too. I want to know what makes you tick; I think I spend too much time trying to figure you out, actually. I’m surprised no one has noticed.”

“I’m simple. I’ll tell you anything you want to know.”

“That will be a long conversation for another time, believe me.” She shifts closer, so their arms are pressed together, and it shouldn’t feel as good to him as it does, her warm skin against his. “I want to know everything there is to know about Aaron Hotchner.”

“And I want to tell you,” he assures her, wants to put his arm around her back, but knows their friends are watching them closely this time. He thinks maybe they’ve noticed more than she believes.

Their drinks are ready much faster this time, and when they return to the table she hands out shots to those who want them while he hands out other drinks to those who don’t. She takes two shots in succession, and he smiles to himself, thinking of her earlier plan.

“You’re crazy, I love Julia Roberts,” Prentiss says about an hour later, when those drinking to get drunk have already done so, and then some. “She’s America’s sweetheart, she’s so beautiful.”

“Okay but we’re talking your dream celebrity hook up,” Morgan clarifies. “You’re telling me Julia Roberts is your dream hook up?”

“Yes. She made me feel things in Pretty Woman, with those long legs in the tub?”

“Yes, the tub,” Sophie agrees, and when she gets some curious looks, she sighs. “It’s stupid to assume everyone is straight all the time, and no one ever asked. I swing all ways, as in, even though I don’t date and haven’t had sex with anyone but myself in far too long to admit to, I like to look at everybody.” She’s moved closer to him in the last hour, and her thigh presses purposefully up against his. “Some people more than others.”

“Oh, we know we’ve gotten Sophie drunk if she’s talking about her sex life,” JJ teases.

“I’m never shy about my sex life, it’s my love life I don’t tell you about, because it’s practically non-existent.”

“And whose fault is that? You’ve been hung up on someone we know nothing about for months. Make a move or move on.”

“I’m working on it. Bossy,” she mutters, presses her thigh against his again. He wants to grab it, pull her legs into his lap, but knows he can’t get away with it. “Hotch, tell her to leave me alone.”

“JJ, leave her alone,” he says just to make Sophie smile; she does, and JJ sticks her tongue out at her.

“Okay, boss’s pet.”

That shouldn’t send a thrill through him, but it does, affects Sophie, too, if the straightening of her spine is any indication. As quickly as it happened, she slumps against the table, chin in her hand. He wonders why, but then her other hand moves to his leg, and he thinks maybe she did it to provide some cover. Clever girl.

“I want to be home. Home home, my own private home, not a house I share with all of you,” she murmurs, and Reid frowns.

“Why? Aren’t you having fun?”

“I am having fun! I am. But it would be different fun. I’ll explain it when you’re older.” Hotch can’t help himself, chuckles at that, and Sophie looks over at him, smiles. “Are we calling it a night? If I get any drunker I’m going to get into trouble.” They share eye contact that probably lasts a beat too long, and he covers her hand with his under the table.

“It’s probably for the best. Do you need me to carry you?”

“No, I’m okay,” she says, standing, and as everyone else gathers their stuff, she stoops under the guise of fixing her shoe, presses a hand to his shoulder for support, and speaks into his ear. “But keep in mind that need and want are two very different things.”

She smirks playfully, and he is so enraptured by her, moves his eyes from her lips to her bare shoulder, strap fallen to the side, wants to kiss her there and slip it back into place; he refrains from the kiss but does hook it with his finger and settle it against her skin, earning a heated look, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip.

He exhales, thinks to himself how silly it is that his heart is racing from just a few looks, a quick comment, the brush of his hand over her shoulder, but he wouldn’t want it any other way.

Heading back to the house is certainly more eventful than the previous night, as Morgan and Garcia giggle about something as she stumbles in her high heels, as JJ and Prentiss take Reid’s arms and link them with theirs for stability. Sophie walks steady, but slow, and Hotch hangs back with her, presses his hand against her lower back when no one is looking.

“I feel like I’m going to wake up in the morning and this will all have been a dream,” she whispers, glancing up at him; he smooths his palm up and down her back, eyes soft as he gazes down at her.

“It does feel like a dream, but nothing changes tomorrow, I promise.” He smiles softly, touches her face before pulling away altogether. “Except you might have a hangover.”

“No, I have foolproof methods. Lots of water before bed and a cup of ginger tea in the morning. I’ll share my methods with you, because I think you’re so cute,” she says with a smile.

“Lucky for me.”

He wants so badly to kiss her goodnight, but of course, they don’t get a chance, someone always hovering by the time they’re ready for bed. He does text her, though, after they go their separate ways.

AH: I’m really glad things happened the way they did tonight. Who knows how long we would have gone on staring silently at each other.

SC: Yeah, we’re pretty dumb for human behavior experts, aren’t we?

SC: I’m going to try to sneak you away tomorrow.

AH: I’ll be waiting. Goodnight.

SC: Goodnight. Sunday Sophie wakes up Sunday at 8:13 feeling like she could walk on air, she’s so happy. She kissed Hotch, Hotch kissed her, there was flirting and touching and it was all intentional and meaningful and magical… She gets a little carried away when she showers, reliving every moment, never so happy she agreed to come on this vacation despite her initial protests that it was too spontaneous.

She knows she needs to liven up a little, do more spontaneous things like go to the beach and kiss her boss and see Europe, go skydiving.

Maybe not the skydiving, but the beach and the boss she can definitely handle. Europe will probably have to wait.

She throws on a swimsuit with a cropped tank top and denim shorts over it and makes for the kitchen to get a cup of tea, smiles when she sees Emily and Garcia there. “Hi ladies. How did you sleep?”

“Like the dead, and now I feel dead,” Garcia grumbles. Emily nods over her cup of coffee.

“I feel like a truck ran over me, backed up, and ran over me again.” Sophie laughs, walks over to the table and sets down her box of tea.

“Have a cup. Cures any ailment, hangovers included, I promise.” Emily glances up, looking suspicious.

“Why are you so chipper? Why aren’t you dead like we are?” She tries not to grin, to be too obvious, but she hasn't been this excited about something in a long time, so it’s hard.

“Mind over matter. Gotta train those brains.” She adds a bit of honey to her tea, stirs it slowly. “It’s a gorgeous day, we have until late afternoon before we need to head back home, we’re having fun. I’m happy.”

“That’s all great stuff, but I can’t focus on it until my eyeballs stop punishing me,” Garcia groans, grabbing the box of tea and heading for the kettle. “Did you meet somebody or something? This is just extreme happiness, even from you. And it’s me who’s saying that.”

“She was with us all night. Well, she wasn’t, but she was with Hotch, so she may as well have been. She didn’t meet anyone.” Oh sweet, brilliant, clueless Emily, Sophie thinks, sitting across from her. She loves when her friends’ brains aren’t firing on all cylinders so she can feel like she has some secrets from them, instead of feeling so exposed all the time.

“Are we making breakfast or going for breakfast? Breakfast will help you guys feel better.”

“Going for breakfast,” Morgan says when he strides into the kitchen behind her. “No yoga this morning? I guess you’re human after all,” he says with a wink, and she just sips her tea because even his teasing isn’t enough to dampen her good mood.

“Takes one to know one. We both have lazy days, we both have feelings—I think we’re getting soft.”

“I’m not,” he says with a grin, lifting his shirt a little just to make Garcia swoon, she’s pretty sure—and it works. “Doesn’t look like you are either, in your little crop top. Trying to impress someone?”

“No, just letting my tummy out, as we all should on vacation. It’s more fun that way.” She drains the rest of her tea and rinses the cup in the sink. “Anyone need a nudge? I’m starving.”

“Haven’t seen JJ or Hotch yet, if you want to check on them,” Emily tells her, and she does grin at that.

“You got it! Hotch and JJ,” she repeats to herself, and she skips JJ’s room to rap on Hotch’s door. He opens it after a moment, looking hotter than should be allowed in a dark blue polo; his eyes roam slowly over her body, which makes her shiver. “Why, good morning, handsome,” she says, low, and he pulls her into his room, shuts the door, and kisses her deeply.

She moans softly in surprise, then weaves her fingers into his hair, stepping backward so she is pressed between the door and his body, which is the stuff of fantasies. His hands feel hot on her waist, his mouth harder than last night, more insistent; she pants for breath when the kiss breaks, runs her hands over his shoulders, pulls him close. “So glad I offered to check on you,” she murmurs, and he smiles softly, presses his mouth to hers again.

“So am I. You look…” He looks her over again, breasts, stomach, legs, back up to her face, wets his lips. “Beautiful doesn’t cover it.”

“Well I’ll take it anyway.” She brings his mouth down to hers for another soft kiss. “I have to check on JJ, but reserve your approval and hopefully we can get a little alone time today.”

“Just one more kiss,” he bargains, smoothing his palm over her throat, and she practically salivates at his touch, would give him anything he asked for. This time it’s a kiss, which is easy enough, and she stretches up on her toes, takes his face in her hands and plants one on him with a soft smack. They both smile. “See you soon.”

“See you soon.” Peeking out into the empty hall, she slips out the door, no one any the wiser, and heads to JJ’s room, pounding on the door with none of the regard she had for Hotch. “Are you up? We’re hungry, come on!” It takes a minute, but JJ pops her head out, hair a mess, eyes tired.

“Make me a coffee. I’ll be out in five minutes.”

“Sure, okay, five minutes though. Hey, do you want my ginger tea? Proven hangover cure, the other girls had some.” She narrows her eyes.

“Tea for now, coffee for the road. Please.” She slams the door, and Sophie laughs to herself, heads to the kitchen, and gets to work. Breakfast is a fun occasion in that everyone leaves the restaurant at least five times happier than when they arrived. Hotch just shakes his head and laughs, glad that his days of drinking to get drunk are over. The team looks rough.

The beach is on the agenda again, and most everyone opts for sunbathing at first, because they’re too full and tired to do anything else. Sophie and Morgan, the two most lively of the bunch, plan to head straight for the water—it’s an activity in itself to watch her strip out of her clothes, baring a little strapless bikini underneath.

Sophie offers to help Morgan with his sunscreen, but Garcia makes a noise of complaint. “Uh uh, my turn,” she says, squeezing some into her palm and handing back the tube. Sophie sighs, looks at JJ like she’s going to ask for help, but Morgan nods in his direction.

“Have Hotch help,” he tells her, and she narrows her eyes at him, gets a raised eyebrow in return. He makes a note to ask what that’s all about, and she looks a little like a deer in the headlights, but she steps over to him because it would be more awkward if she didn't, now.

“You know who to blame for this,” she mutters as she kneels down next to him, hands back the tube of sunblock, and she lifts her hair so he has access to her neck. He has to hold himself back from pressing his lips there, settles for imagining what she’d sound like if he did.

“Or who to thank, depending on how you look at it,” he counters as he rubs the lotion on. He feels the tension in her shoulders slip away as he works it in, the white cream melting into her smooth, brown skin. It’s like her whole body softens at his touch, and he makes a mental note to rub her shoulders often, when he gets the chance, could stand to see her look a little less tense most days. “At least I get to be close to you.”

“You’re sweet,” she says, humming as his hands move down her back. “I’m happy to be close to you too, just don’t need my coworkers watching me get rubbed down by the guy I like.”

“I do like the sound of that.” He presses his fingers against her neck, behind her ears, and she practically purrs at his touch, head tipping to the side. He’d like to spend more time there, it’s clear she enjoys it, but he knows he can’t milk it for too long. He slides his hands away, wipes them on his towel. “All set. My hands are free when you need to reapply.” She turns to face him, looks soft and relaxed and gorgeous, and shoots him a tender smile.

“Thanks. I’m still working on a plan for us, so I’ll be back soon.” She stands, throws the sunscreen at Morgan, and they chase each other into the water.

“Hey, will someone come up to the house with me?” Sophie asks after a while, and pretty much everyone is half asleep—either napping, in a food coma, or something in between—so it’s easy for him to volunteer himself, for them to slip away together. When they’re far enough away from the team’s line of sight, he scoops her up and throws her over his shoulder, earning laughter so hard it leaves her breathless. They make it inside the house, and he sets her down, her cheeks red and smile bright. “I cannot believe you did that,” she says, grabbing his shirt in her hands, and she pulls him close for a kiss that they laugh through, her hands shifting to come up around his neck.

“You were going too slow, I was getting impatient,” he teases, and she kisses him deeper, less playful, more passionate. He wraps his arms around her body, pulls her close, and they fumble toward the living room, collapse into a heap on the couch. They laugh, straighten out so they’re sitting somewhat normally, though very close.

“You’re so good at that, I think I dreamed about it.” She brushes gentle fingers through his hair, puts her legs in his lap just like he thought of doing at the bar, and kisses him softly a couple of times. “This isn’t just because we’re on vacation, right? I mean, tomorrow, when we wake up in our own beds, we’re not just going to pretend none of this happened?” He takes her hand, brings it to his lips, holds it.

“I couldn’t look at you and pretend none of this happened. Never.” He kisses her hand again, and she shifts so that she’s sitting up on her knees, so they can be closer, kiss better, he has to assume. One hand rests against his chest and the other loops around his neck, and they kiss long, hot, deep, so he has to pull back for breath. “Sophie,” he sighs when they separate, his hand gentle on her face. “I want you to know, I’ve never done this, or even thought about doing this with anyone from work. Not before you.”

“Neither have I. It’s just… you.” She leans in for a softer, sweeter kiss. “What do we do now? I guess, just to clarify: you want to date me, right? You don’t just want sex—I want to be sure we’re on the same page.” He puts his hands on her waist, like he’s holding her steady, looks into her eyes.

“I don’t just want sex. I want to spend time with you outside of the office. I want to take you on dates. I want to learn everything there is to know about you. I want to kiss you…” His eyes drift to her lips, and she leans up, presses them softly to his a couple of times.

“So we’ll need to tell Strauss? Gideon? The team?"

“I’ll tell Strauss, and she’ll change your reporting structure so that you report to Gideon, formally. It won’t change anything in the field, but he will have to be in charge of your performance reviews, psych evals, and future promotions so there’s no conflict of interest.”

“That’s good. I don’t want anyone to think I’ll be treated any differently.” He takes her face in his hands, kisses her slow, and she pulls back periodically to speak. “Not that... I think the team would, but... that’s good.” His lips move down the column of her throat, and she tilts her head, inviting more; her voice gets light and breathy. “Mmm, Hotch.”

He pulls back a little, sure he’s wearing a grimace; something about that, as good as it sounds, just does not rub him the right way.

“I think it might be better if you call me Aaron when we’re not working. It might help, you know, to have a little separation?” She nods, bites at her lip, and leans in for another kiss.

“Yes, that sounds good. I want to call you by your first name, but no one ever does, so I was waiting on you to tell me it was okay.” She brushes the pads of her fingers over his lips, his chin. “Kiss me, Aaron.”

He grins at that, puts his arm behind her and tips them both over so she’s laying under him, soft, sun-kissed, beautiful. She smiles, and he leans in, kisses her throat some more. “You smell so good, always like the beach, but especially now.” He’s pretty much destined to have a Pavlovian response to the smell of coconut and sunscreen, he thinks, but he doesn’t mind at all.

“If only you would take off your shirt and come swimming with us,” she teases, holding tightly to his shoulders, “I could make you smell all beachy too.” She catches his mouth in a kiss, grins against his lips. “Plus it would be nice to ogle you like you’ve been ogling me.” He scoffs, pulling a face.

“I haven’t been ogling you, I’ve been admiring you. There’s a difference.”

“Well in that case, let me admire you,” she coos in his ear, tongue curling over the lobe, and he kisses her deeply.

They are completely lost in each other when someone clears their throat above them, and they freeze; Sophie covers her eyes like it’s not happening if she doesn’t look, but Hotch is resigned to his fate, glances up and sees Gideon not looking very surprised. He doesn’t seem to have an opinion at all, actually, or at least his face doesn’t.

He sits up, pulling her with him, but she still can't look Gideon in the eye. Gideon, for what it’s worth, just nods. “I guess we’ll be going over some things in my office tomorrow,” he says, neutral, and Hotch nods.

“Yes. I’ll��I’ll get with Strauss in the morning.”

“Okay,” is all he says, and he heads down the hall to his room. Sophie groans.

“Okay, so we’ve determined we can’t be sneaky to save our lives.” She looks thoroughly embarrassed, but he just chuckles and pulls her closer, wraps his arms around her in an embrace.

“No, I guess we can’t. You’re too distracting.” She turns back to look at him, nose scrunched adorably.

“I’m too distracting? Compared to you, all on top of me, touching me with those hands?”

“They’re the only hands I’ve got,” he jokes, and she smiles indulgently, like she thinks he’s an idiot but likes him anyway. “We should probably head back anyway. I think we pressed our luck enough for today.” She grins at that, and he feels instantly like he should regret something he said. “What?”

“I’ll go quietly if you come swimming.” She adopts that puppy dog look he’s helpless against, presses her lips to his. “Please. It will be fun.” He sighs like he’s put out, but can’t resist smiling when she breaks into a grin of her own. “Yes! Okay, take off your shirt.”

“Now?” he asks with a laugh. “If we come back from the house and I’m half naked, eyebrows will be raised.”

“Just for a minute,” she explains, tugging at his collar. “I need to admire you before we’re out there so I don’t drool in front of them and embarrass myself.”

“You’re dangerous, you know that,” he says, pulling his polo over his head. “Those eyes could make a man do anything.”

“Well unfortunately for you, you’re the only man I plan to use them on.” She’s smiling, but her expression quickly fades to something more serious, and she flicks her eyes to his, then down his body, back up.

She opens her mouth to speak, decides against it, and leaps at him; he barely gets his arms up in time to catch her, and they almost go crashing back onto the sofa.

“God, you look so good,” she mumbles against his lips, hands in his hair. “I knew you’d be hot under all those suits, and then we got here and you’ve dressed more casually and it’s been just… the best.” She pulls back, runs her hands over all the bare skin she can reach, smiles broadly. “Can’t believe I get to touch you like this.” Slowly, he sweeps his palms over her body, brings her to him for a kiss.

“The feeling is so very mutual.” After another couple of kisses, she jumps out of his arms, hands back his shirt, though it’s clear she doesn’t want to.

“Glad we got that out of the way; I don’t know how the group would have reacted to me tackling you on the beach.”

“With incredulity, I’m sure. I don’t think I exactly fit what people would perceive to be your type.” She rolls her eyes, and they head out the door.

“What people perceive to be my type has nothing to do with me, or you.” She loops her hand loosely around his arm as they walk down to the beach. “And I don’t have a type, so we’re good.” As they get closer to the team, they move farther apart, and he already misses the feel of her skin.

“There you guys are,” JJ says when they approach, holding her hand over her eyes to shield from the sun. “Gideon went back to the house for a while, I’m sure you saw him.”

“We sure did see him,” Sophie says, dropping down onto her towel. “Are you guys alive yet? We’re gonna go swimming.” She scans the group, which is missing a few members. “Where are Morgan and Garcia?”

“Taking a walk,” Prentiss says with a suggestive tone. Hotch sighs, knows that soon enough the suggestive tone will be used at their expense. He wonders if Sophie thought that through, how invasive their friends can actually be. “They’ll be back by lunch, and then I guess it’s back to boring Quantico.”

“And that’s exactly why we’re swimming. Come on.” She stands up, walks backward toward the water with a smile. “Come on, Hotch, you promised.” Reid looks over at him with a curious expression, but he just shrugs and pulls off his shirt.

“I did promise.”

He’s not mad he did, either, because for a while it’s just the two of them, floating companionably in the luxuriously warm water, chatting about nothing, and she’s incredibly gorgeous with wet hair and a smile.

JJ and Prentiss join them eventually, and then there’s splashing, which is less enjoyable, but it’s clear Sophie is happy he agreed to swim, so he can’t find it in himself to be too irritated. They gather back at the house for a quick lunch, and they pack their stuff, load up the cars—this time they are split guys and girls, at JJ’s request.

“Thanks, Gideon, for the house, and Garcia, for the plan,” Prentiss says before they leave. “This was a great idea. Much needed.”

“Best weekend ever,” Sophie agrees, and she smiles softly when he catches her eye.

“That was awesome,” JJ says when they’re on the road. She looks back at Garcia with a grin. “So tell us, did you hook up with Morgan? Is Morcia a thing now?”

“I didn’t hook up with him, but…” She grins, and Sophie finds it infectious. “We talked, and I think we’re going on a date this week, barring any traveling you guys might have to do.”

“Yay for a date,” Sophie says, pulling her into a one armed hug. The women in the front shout their happiness a bit louder. “I’m glad, seriously. You guys are too cute not to be together if you want to be.”

“Thanks, I’m just worried about the whole ‘working together’ thing.” She looks over with a frown. “What if it’s awkward? What if I say something weird?”

“You already answer his phone calls with ‘talk dirty to me’—work phone calls. I don’t think you have to worry about it being awkward,” Prentiss says, looking into the back seat. “You two have chemistry, and he’s head over heels for you.”

“And hot,” JJ says from the driver's seat. “You don’t let a guy that hot go because of a little awkward. You hold on for dear life.” They all laugh, and even Garcia seems happier after the short conversation. She segues into another topic, which makes Sophie feel a little awkward.

“Speaking of hot: Hotch took off his shirt, and I liked what I saw,” Garcia says with a playful grin.

“I know, right?” Prentiss says, glancing back again. “Who knew he’d be so buff under his sad fed suits.” I knew, I knew! Sophie thinks, but she knows she can’t say it without spilling the beans about everything that happened over the weekend, so she just hums in agreement.

“We can thank Sophie for getting him out of his shell this weekend,” JJ adds, looks back at her through the rear view mirror. “First she got him dancing, then swimming… I sense that Reid has competition for BFF.”

“Yep, me and Hotch, best buds,” she says, leaning against the window. Garcia seems to find something in her tone, if the look on her face is any consideration, but says nothing. “I’m sad Reid didn’t play on the beach though. He actually is my best bud, but he’s a tough nut to crack.”

The conversation gets lighter from there, a little more talk about Morgan and Garcia, how good breakfast was, how they’re never drinking again. When Sophie gets a text message, she’s a little too excited to answer it, almost throws her phone across the car when she fumbles it.

AH: Can I call you tonight? I realized we didn’t talk about everything you had questions about. I got distracted.

SC: No worries. I got distracted too.

SC: I’ll let you know when I’m home.

She is just unpacking her suitcase and contemplating what to have for dinner when her phone rings, and she grins. He didn’t even wait for her text, which is cute, and she tries to simmer down so she doesn’t sound like a complete weirdo when she answers.

She picks up her phone, and it’s not Aaron’s name she sees, but JJ’s.

“You don’t know how sorry I am to tell you this, but we have a case.” She sighs down the line. “Los Angeles. It’s bad, or I’d say it can wait until morning.”

“Don’t be sorry, it’s your job. And we knew the vacation couldn’t last forever.” She drops her suitcase on the floor and replaces it with her go bag, stuffs it full of durable clothes. “I’ll see you in half an hour, JJ, thanks.”

“See you then.”

Sophie locks her phone and tosses it on the bed, does her best to get into a BAU state of mind.

[waynewifey]

A dream of you and me—

soulmate!au

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Summary: In a world where a dream means something more, trying to save the boy from your dreams can change your life.

Warnings: angst, crying

Words: 1900.

A/N: Thank you so much for the amazing feedback on my last fic! I’m sorry it took me so long to comeback, please remember that my requests are always open! I hope you like this.

I've always liked dreaming. It's the moment of the day where I'm taken to a random place with random people to live a priceless adventure. Tonight I dreamed with a boy. Well, I was the boy. We were running through the Hogwarts corridors, but somehow no one saw us. It was like we were invisible. We ran up to the bridge, staring at the moonlight. He was sad for an unknown reason, I could feel it. I saw his black locks blocking the vision when it winded. I've never seen his face before, but, somehow, he felt like... home. He let out a deep breath and I heard some footsteps approaching. Suddenly, the image became blurred. I let out a gasp, waking up. I stared at the ceiling for a moment, before opening my curtains, looking around and noticing it was still night. I got up and walked to the biggest window in the room. The moon looked exactly like the one in my dream. Maybe it is happening right now, I thought. But that was impossible. Well, not really impossible, more like improbable. The soulmate link was a very rare occasion. One would dream about the day or the moment the other were living for days or years, until they meet and recognise each other as soulmates. But they wouldn't see faces or hear voices, so that turned the meeting more difficult and rare. I've never met soulmates beside the ones in fantasy books.

The morning after, I woke up earlier than usual, as I could barely sleep. I got ready quickly and ran to the Great Hall. I was looking for someone who looked like they haven't slept properly, someone who may be up all night. But, to be honest, all seventh graders looked almost dead, thanks to the exams. A red head sat beside me, putting some books on the table.

"I have something to tell you." I immediately said.

"Not even a 'Good Morning'? Fine then. What is it?" Lily Evans replied. I rolled my eyes at her, beginning to speak.

"I dreamt with someone. I know it's rare but I really think it may be... that." She looked disinterested, picking her food. "Lily, I'm serious! It felt so real! And I could feel his feelings too! What should I do?"

"There's nothing to do yet, I guess. You'll have to keep dreaming and collecting clues. But maybe you could forget about it and help me with my charms assignments." She bit a piece of bread and I gave her an yellow smile. By the corner of the eye, I saw a group of boys approaching.

"Or you could ask your pain in the ass boyfriend." She scoffed, turning around and smiling at James Potter, whom were now sitting beside her, embracing her back with his arm and laughing loudly about something I didn't knew. Remus Lupin sat on my side, as usual. He was the only tolerable one in the group. He often helped me with my studies, but our relationship was very far from a friendship. Other two boys sat in front of us.

The day went by normally. Too many classes for my last two neurones. I was exited to go to my dorm and sleep, to test my theory.

I could see the dark sky and the Whomping Willow. A rat ran to the roots of the tree and pressed a small knot. The tree stoped moving. We dove into a hole next to it. After a long time walking inside of a tight tunnel, we arrived at the gardens of a house. The Shrinking Shack?! What is he doing here? We entered the house and walked to what looked like a living room. I watched as a gigantic creature approached. Some kind of wolf, but it was standing in two legs. It's arms were thin. It was looking a bit... tired? I analysed the beast carefully. A werewolf! Why was he around that monster? He was in danger!

I jumped out of  bed, running to get my robe and my wand. I left the dorms, running to the Castle Grounds. The wind was extremely cold, but I kept running. I searched for the knot on the Whomping Willow. After a few times being thrown in the air by the tree, I finally got to the secret hole. It seemed like it took me forever to get to the house. I heard a howl and a growl, which made me desperate to find my soulmate. Would he even be alive by now? I came across a bizarre scene. A werewolf, a huge black dog, a stag and a mouse – the mouse in my dreams – all laying on the floor. The werewolf turned its head to me, growling at me. The dog jumped, getting in front of me. Where was my soulmate? The werewolf tried to attack me, but the stag got on its way. They were protecting me? Why? The dog barked at me, getting my attention. He ran to the exit door, turning his head back at me, as if he were calling me. I followed him. I ran to the gardens, but the dog was gone. Suddenly, a boy came out of behind a tree, wearing a black fur robe. I annalized his face in the moonlight. I recognised his black locks from my dreams. Sirius Black.

"What are you doing here? You need to go back to the castle right now." He said, eyes not focusing on me and ears on alert, still taking care of whatever was happening in the house.

"What are YOU doing here?! Did you know that is not a regular wolf, but a werewolf?! And if it bites you-"

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Now, you. Leave." He cut my speech, making me roll my eyes.

"I can't let you die! Every night I have these dreams, you're always getting yourself in trouble and-"

"You dream with me? You saw Moony?"

"Yes, Black, keep track. Stop interrupting me. Wait, who's Moony?" Sirius looked around, getting closer and lowering his voice, like he was about to tell me a secret.

"Remus Lupin. He's a werewolf. The stag is James Potter. I'm not sure if you've seen it, but the rat is Peter Pettigrew and... I'm the dog. Yeah, yeah, woof. We're animagus. Remus is under control... well, kind of. But it's still not safe for you and I need to take you back to the castle." I was stunned when he grabbed me by the elbow and made me walk all the way back. My thoughts wouldn't process, my mind was a mess.

"You're supposed to drink the tea, not stare at it, you know?" Sirius said, his voice echoing in the empty common room. I blinked for the first time in a while. I took a last look at my teacup, glancing upwards. I stared at his obsidian orbits, frowning my eyebrows trying to figure out what to say. Sirius Black was my soulmate. This guy I've never really talked to before, whom I know practically nothing about, and now I discover he's an illegal animagus, friends with a werewolf and will probably reject me so badly the angels will pity and and let me escape from hell. Because I made it quite obvious by telling him about my dreams, and he ignored it.

"I dreamt about you, you know what this means, right?" I couldn't keep the eye contact for long and quickly went back to staring at my tea. I moved in the couch to a more closed posture.

"Yeah, I understand it just fine." He said. I couldn't figure out his emotions by the tone of his voice, so I looked at him. His expression was as neutral as his tone, not helping me at all.

"Oh, okay. I wasn't expecting this." I rested my cup on the coffee table in front of us, getting up. I felt a slight spark of anger inside of me, starting to burn everything. He scoffed, leaning back on the chair. "Well I don't like that either! It's just- It seems unfair to condemn me to literal hell just because you're not happy about me being your soulmate!" The words bursted out of my mouth without a previous warning, tears forming in my eyes. I had waited for so long to see if I had a soulmate and he just scorn me like that? "I'm sorry if I'm not what you expected, but this isn't my fault!" I blubbered, gathering all the small amount strength that kept me on foot to turn around and walk away. But before I could do so, his arms embraced me in a harm and desperate hug. The smell of his hair made me dizzy, and I could honestly live there.

"I never believed in this. I never thought fate would bring someone to keep company to a person like me but- seeing you cry made my heart ache... So please stay. I don't care if we're soulmates or not, I just... need you here."

Epilogue — 3 years later.

I finished mixing the coffee and placed it at the silver tray. I took a final look: scrambled eggs, fried tomatoes and mushrooms, and bangers — it all looked delicious. Not the kind of thing I was used to do, but I definitely am good at it. I walked to our room and opened the door. He was in the same place he was when I left earlier: the bed. I put the tray on the nightstand, preparing myself to wake him up. I sat beside him, staring at his unique features. The sunlight coming through the curtains lightened his nude torso and I got myself admiring his skin.

“Breakfast in bed? Who are you and what have you done to my girlfriend?” His husky morning voice, massaged my ears. “Fiancée, actually.”

“Well, I thought this was a great way to celebrate your first day of work and our three year anniversary.” I kissed the top of his head as my hands danced around on his curls. “But don’t get used to it, you’re the cooker in this relationship.”

“I love you, Y/N L/N Black.” I stared down at his face. The same face of the boy I fell in love with, a long time ago, and I remembered the first time we kissed through sobs and hugs. This was when I realised I loved Sirius Black more than anything in the world and I knew we were forever. I smiled at him and kissed him passionately.

“I love you too.” He smiled widely at me and pulled me to under the sheets, throwing my apron across the room. “You’ll be late, Siri.” Sirius rolled his eyes at me and got on top of me.

“I have more important matters to deal with right now.”

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Damn, Kohga has clearly been fucked by A LOT of men (like damn, his ass doesn't even need prep) And Sooga is clearly possessive AS FUCK. Consider: Kohga tying down/ordering Sooga to sit still while Kohga jacks it/fingers himself, while telling Sooga FILTHY stories of his past dalliances until Sooga can't handle it anymore.

Ooooh this is a GOOD idea. Sooga maybe bottom, but he's a possessive bottom, and we STAN that energy. 

Kohga was horny as SHIT. Nothing new in that sentence, but what was different was the fact that it was caused by Sooga's possessiveness. It started off innocently enough; Kohga wanting to spank his big, juicy ass. Simple enough. Then he got into it. Hard, fierce spanking across his ass. And what caused it? That classic territorial nature of all blade masters. Kohga so much as MENTIONED bringing one in, and he just slapped his ass six ways from sunday. Hell, he needed to sit on a pillow for a few days after that. He even recalled how Sooga apologized for that, but Kohga would have none of it. Sooga was an ANIMAL. He just had to take the beast out of the cage.

"But how…."

He asked himself, rolling over to his stomach. He sent Sooga out on some scavenger hunt (he did this whenever he needed Sooga out of the base for a while), and was left to his own devices. He needed time to think about just how he was gonna get a rise out of Sooga. Poking the beast, so to speak. He couldn’t bring another guy in to watch, they'd start beating the shit out of each other (though them fighting was ALWAYS hot). Sooga wouldn’t even let them be near their DOOR when they did it. It was ridiculous. Other guy's Kohga fucked was not this complicated. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. He nearly bolted out of bed, completely astounded by his own brilliance.

"Kohga! You're not only a hunk, you're a GENIUS!"

Kohga knew just what to do.

---------------------

"Master Kohga, I have returned."

Kohga nearly bounced in place upon hearing his voice. He was SO ready for his pretty boy to come home. He opened his door, nearly yanking Sooga inside his room, and pulling him into a hug. Sooga sputtered in surprise, before chuckling and returning the affection.

"I was not expecting such a warm welcome for my arrival."

"Well, shame on you! Been waiting for you to come back! You like that mushy couple bullshit, so you'll love this!"

He looked up at Sooga, who cocked his head to the side.

"I do. But you don't."

"One, shut up. Two, I love YOU. So! We're gonna do something...interesting."

He pulled up a chair for Sooga (aka the good chair he got from Kingy), while he sat on his bed. Sooga was clearly not understanding what was happening, but he was going along with it, especially given Kohga’s excitement. He had drinks, snacks (mainly slices of nut cake and fruit), and even candles. It was sweet, honestly. Kohga patted his hand, clearly excited.

"So, Traysi recommends this for couples who are VERY serious about each other."

"The woman who runs the rumor mill? Should we be following-"

Kohga flicked his mask, huffing.

"We do not disrespect Traysi here. And yes, we're doing this. So you're ready?"

"If you are, absolutely."

"Good, you're going to go first. Now, tell me about EVERYONE you've been with before."

Sooga seemed confused by this. But, it was not only a command from Kohga, but Kohga actually and honestly trying to bond with him. Who could say no to that? Sooga thought about it for a moment.

"Let's see...when I was five, I married my neighbor's daughter. We had a mud cake and everything."

He chuckled. It wasn’t at all a serious answer, but it was just. So odd, recalling his past relationships, especially since they seemed so redundant now. He rubbed his chin a bit.

"Then there was Nabooru. I dated her when I was about fourteen. Lovely girl."

Kohga cocked his head to the side.

"You ACTUALLY dated girls?"

"In my teen years. When I was seventeen we broke up, started to date a stable boy. Shad. He was...a bit of a bookworm. I really liked him."

"What happened to you guys?"

Sooga hesitated, opening his mouth then closing it again.

"Father didn't....what I mean to say is...uhm, If I may skip, Master Kohga."

Oof, rough territory. Kohga waved his hand, letting him know to press on. Sooga shook the thought out of his head, happy to no longer be thinking about it.

"Then there were the occasional hookups. Nothing serious, a few men to share a bed with for the night. Chudly, Benja, and Vilia. Then it was you."

Kohga blinked. Wow. Could buy a piece of bread with that body count.

"That's...it? Only FIVE people? And one was a WOMAN? That’s ALL the people you’ve been with?!”

“Yes. Though, I wouldn’t fully include the first one, in all honesty.”

Sooga rubbed the back of his neck shyly, clearly a bit embarrassed from how little that seemed to be. Kohga just couldn’t fathom that. Five people, in his entire life. Sooga was a young stud, he could get plenty of his ass, just on his walk home. Kohga couldn’t fathom that. Sooga seemed to shrink a bit under his clearly bewildered look.

“Is that...too few?”

Kohga realized he was making Sooga feel self conscious. He was aiming for jealousy, not this. He raised his hands up a bit, shaking his head.

“No! No, any number is fine, even none. I’m just saying, I expected a LOT more. I mean, LOOK at you!”

Sooga chuckled, blushing like crazy underneath his mask like the cute guy he was. 

“Well, thank you, Master Kohga. But no, I have not been with anyone else. Just those, and I haven’t missed one. You know, I can actually see the merit in this piece of advice. It feels good, getting that off my chest. Is it your turn?”

Kohga almost wanted to cuddle his big, dumb face. Thankfully, he was too horny to bail on his plans. Kohga nodded.

“It is, actually. BUT. I have one order to give you, got it?”

“I...suppose.”

“You have to stay put in that chair. No matter what. Understand?”

Sooga looked confused, but he nodded.

“I’m afraid I don’t understand. But, an order is an order. I will stay seated.”

“Good. Good.”

Kohga grabbed his box of fun stuff, placing it right next to him, then laid on his back. He hoisted one leg over the other, arms behind his head.

“Okay, get comfy. Now, the first guy I dated was when I was...seventeen or so? I wanted to date earlier, but dad said to wait. Anyway, he was a merchant that’d come by every once and while. He was SUPER cute, and honestly? Not too bad of a kisser. I’m pretty sure I wasn’t the only guy he was seeing, but...well, I couldn’t complain, he was super cute. Nice hair. Always dated guys with nice hair.”

Kohga remembered those early years. Back when he didn’t know shit. Back when kissing was new and exciting to him. Sooga looked confused.

“I thought you said no one but you and your father saw your face.”

“Oh no, I NEVER took this off. A wise man caught nude will cover his face, not his privates.”

That made Sooga chuckle.

“A rather clever, yet lewd saying. Please, do continue.”

“Gladly.”

Kohga twiddled with his fingers as he recalled. Is he supposed to go in order? Or just whatever crossed his mind? He thought about it, before he thought about it.

“Oooh, then there was another one of my boyfriends. He was going through like, this weird hair phase? His hair was red, he had it up, and he was just. Big. Big, buff, and honestly he was just. Stupid. Let me tell you, I could grab onto his arm, and he could lift me up with absolutely no issues. We didn’t last long though, he thought he was hot shit. He GENUINELY said ‘babe, you’re pretty, but I’m prettier’. Can you imagine that? Ugh. Dude fucked good though, he REALLY did. He’d get all hot and sweaty after his work outs, and then. Well, dude fucked good. Real good.”

Kohga stripped himself free of his pants, and held his finger up when Sooga clearly wanted to ask questions. He stripped himself free, before getting comfy again, just stroking at his thighs.

“I remember once, when he got back from his trip across seas, he ended up fucking me right in the bar. We got just, so drunk, and he couldn’t keep himself off of me. He railed me in front of all his men, the barkeep, and pretty much who seemed to be paying attention. I was a young thing back then, a thick dick was all it took. I remember, I tried to give him his beer after he came in me, and I just, dumped it all over his chest by accident. He was a good sport about it, all I had to do was clean him up. Only, I didn’t have a rag, so...I had to improvise. Licked that dude like a lollipop.”

Sooga not so gracefully, grabbed a bottle of his favorite oil, and used it to rub along his thighs, just for a bit of a show, before sticking two fingers into his ass. Been a while since he touched himself like this, much less in front of someone else, and it felt GOOD, watching his greedy eyes upon him.

“It wasn’t a long relationship, but it was a fun one. Let's see, who else was there...ooh, there was that one guy. Dad HATED him, and I think there was a huge appeal in that. He was in charge of fixing trains and stuff. Big, muscle guy. Cute scar, tattoos, big hands. He wasn’t as rebellious as the other guy. We lasted a bit longer, but not by much. Super sweet. I remember he'd pick me out of nowhere, just because he could. That dude was the sorta romance then in your pants dance type. But he was KINKY. Dude really liked holding me down and giving it to me. I remember, we got REAL rough with it one time, he tied my hands up, tied me up in his workshop, and just railed my ass. Swore we almost got caught by a client once!"

Kohga laughed, really digging and stretching his ass.

"He taught me how to do this. Taught me how to get my nice, oily fingers inside of me. Taught me how to get nice and ready for the cocks he knew I wanted. In a way...he was my first.”

He snuck a glance at Sooga’s eyes, and he saw it. The little sparkles of jealousy. He knew he wasn’t his first, but knowing the details really got under his skin. Kohga introduced three fingers now, really arching his back as he felt himself be a little bit stretched. Sooga wasn’t goosey loosey down there, but he could take three fingers, knuckle deep, before he felt that familiar longing inside of him.

“Then...Then there was this other guy. Up until I started the clan, he was my partner in crime. Long hair, always kept in a ponytail. Nice, strong hands, and his eyes were something else. They were so...intense. Should’ve seen me the first time I caught those eyes, I was on him like a stack of bananas. He was the more...aloof than most of the guys I dated. He’d pop in and out, constantly looking for ways to get stronger. Never really got that guy. We would just..somehow end up in bed together. Sometimes it would be in a bed over some stable, sometimes it’d be some random, abandoned spot in the mountains. Either way, he’d fuck me, and be gone by morning. Hell, I don’t even think I caught his name. I just remembered we REALLY, REALLY liked each other.”

Kohga had to admit, recalling all of his past lovers was very, very fun. Recalling how many big, strong men wanted him, how each one fucked him differently, it was thrilling. He pulled his fingers out of himself, letting Sooga take a gander at his oiled, willing ass. The same ass that knew many, many men, and started to pump his cock. He would go on with his other boyfriends, but he didn’t want to wait longer. He wanted to hit Sooga right in that weak spot.

“Then the clan started. Those other blade masters...well. Let’s just say there’s a reason they’re so high in the ranks.”

He saw Sooga’s fingers grip onto the seats. He was already fuming from his past lovers, but his own peers? Oh, that was a way to get under a blade master’s hide. He was getting ANGRY. Not at Kohga of course, just the motion that ANYONE touched his precious Kohga.

“I remember once, a couple of them snuck into my room. They thought I was dead asleep, but I was very much awake. I felt them grope me, felt them pull at my clothes till it came off. Next thing I knew I had two in my ass, and two in my hands. Course I had that one guy in my mouth two, and the other three watching...oh who really knows? Once one was done, another guy took over. They pumped me full of cum, sucked and toyed with my cock. And I remembered I’d bark at them not to cum until I did, so they fucked me HARDER. Let me tell you, I have NEVER been that full of cum. Was practically swimming in it, and that was just how I liked it. I remembered them all tuckered out, asking if they pleased me.”

Kohga lifted his head up to look at his eyes. So angry, so jealous and furious, as if he was going to kill them for an absolute injustice.

“This...was the only case of them, yes?”

“Ooooh no. No. Not at all. Until you fell into the mix, I’d have a select few fuck me a few times a week. I still remember my favorite one. Big, strong guy. He’d tie my hands up in rope, nice and tight, and he’d just hold me down when he fucked me. He’d lean into my ear and whispered words dirty enough to make me shake. He was my favor-”

That was enough. Suddenly Sooga was on top of him, slamming his palm over Kohga’s mouth. Kohga was expecting something angry, something a bit kinky. But no. Sooga was FURIOUS. There was no stammering, no sweet talking, not even him asking as sweetly as he usually would. He just stuffed his cock in his eager, oiled ass, and fucked him. Fucked him with enough force that the head board kept knocking against the wall, that his hips ached from such a big, heavy body putting so much force into him.

"Stop it. Stop it. You're doing this to get a rise out of me. You want me to fuck you so badly, Master Kohga? I'll do that. I'll fuck you. I'LL be your favorite. No one else. Just me. Look at me."

And Kohga was LOOKING. Sooga had his legs wrapped around his own, keeping him in place so he had no choice but to take that nice, hard cock, right against that good fucking spot. Kohga tugged and clawed at his hand, as if he was trying to get Sooga off. Thank god Sooga knew better. Kohga just liked to thrash a bit, really MAKE his partner fuck his shit up. And Sooga was LOVING it. Kohga managed to move his mouth away a bit, trying not to grin too wildly.

"That's it, FUCK ME Sooga! Fuck my oiled ass, make me think of only YOUR cock!"

Kohga reached up to grab fistfulls of his uniform, yanking him to his face. Fuck that beautiful, panting face.

"Fuck me nice and proper, Sooga. Make me cum. Be my favorite boy, make my exes look like fucking LOSERS!"

Sooga may be pounding his ass like dough, but Kohga’s demands were still Kohga's. Sooga obeyed, shoving his fingers into Kohga’s pretty mouth, nearly making him gag as he continued to pound into him. Kohga knew he did that because he liked his dirty talk. Knew that he would cum if he listened to his pleading Master anymore, and he really, really wanted to be a good boy. Unfortunately, Sooga was so weak for his master. His fingers peeled out of his mouth, Sooga quickly becoming un done by not only his words, but his nice, tight body. Not that Kohga minded a small break from the rather large fingers. He was happy to sit there, moaning and grumbling, just absolutely so close to that edge.

“You LIKE fucking your Master Kohga, don’t you big guy?”

For a moment, they looked each other in the face, and Kohga only saw lust and competition. Exactly what he deserved to see in those big, pretty eyes of his. Sooga seemed to feel the exact same, as he leaned down, and pressed his forehead against his. For a moment, he was calm, still.

“I love you. More than anything. As such...I refuse to let your heart, or your loins, long for another.”

Translation? ‘Your ass is fucking mine’. This was right before Sooga put one hand on his chest, and the other on the headboard, continuing to slam his hips against Kohga. He couldn’t stop him (well he was strong enough to, but who the fuck would stop a BEAST like this?), and that’s how he liked it. He liked the force of his thrusts, liked the way the bed seemed to complain from the force, and loved, absolutely loved the feeling as hot seed was pumped into his insides. Kohga greedily raked his fingers down his back, finding himself cumming almost completely on time with Sooga. It had been SO long since that had happened, and it made poor Kohga’s body tremble. He sat there for a moment, letting Sooga finish emptying his balls right into him. It took a lot out of poor Sooga, given his panting, but his hips didn’t completely stop, instead settling for a nice, slow roll into Kohga.

“M...master Kohga? I’m...sorry.”

“Fucking hell Sooga, don’t you DARE apologize here, you ANIMAL.”

Kohga chuckled, wiping his face underneath his mask, finding himself drenched in sweat. Sooga shook his head.

“You don’t understand. I uh, do believe I broke the bed frame.”

Kohga was a bit too buzzed to fully understand, before it clicked. He leaned over a bit, and sure enough, Sooga broke three out of the four legs underneath his bed. What a feat. Kohga tossed his head back as he laughed, pushing into his shoulder.

“Oh, you were NOT kidding! Damn Sooga, look at you! Though you’re a big boy, shoot for all four next time.”

Sooga lightly shook his head, sighing. He could tell he was amused in his exhaustion.

“You’re relentless, Master Kohga, truly.”

Sooga’s finger danced up his chest, before he flicked his chin.

“The other Blade Master could do it.”

Sooga’s firm hand pushed onto his chest, nearly knocking the wind out of Kohga.

“You enjoy me putting me through trials, Master Kohga. You really, really do.”

“Oh, bite me, big boy.”

Sooga’s voice got nice and low, making Kohga nearly swoon underneath him.

“Is that a challenge?”

Something told Kohga, that Sooga was ready to prove himself as the best of the best.

Even if it took many, many more attempts.

[revisionaryhistory]

Three Days ~ 87

Emma

Slow dancing and kissing in the middle of the floor had been as perfect of goodbye as a goodbye could be. Sebastian had updated his playlists. There was nothing sexual. Every song was I love you, I've been waiting for you, I'm happy you're mine. Intense love songs. I felt every one. I stayed in the moment, focusing on how good this felt. We held each other, swaying to the music and alternating between my head laying on his shoulder, gazing in the other's eyes, or kissing. We were in our own little bubble. There was nothing but how his body felt against mine, how he smelled, and the look of his face. All I felt was encapsulated in a swirl of feelings. Love, joy, and a touch of sadness hiding on the edge.

The bubble burst with the knock on the door. Time to go. there was no chance of getting through this without tears. Strong emotions always bring tears. I don't fight them. Letting them out feels better. I don't think emotions are anything to be ashamed of or hide. They're also not something to manipulate others with.

At the car, we were both crying. Not holding onto each other sobbing, just tears.

Saying goodbye was hard. His "I love you. I'll miss you. I'll talk to you Later. Send nudes." broke the sadness enough to get the car door closed. I watched him slide away. I wiped away a few more tears before talking myself down. Six weeks was a long fucking time, but it wasn't forever. It would probably feel like it, however.

My solution was to avail myself of the Air France business class lounge. Two shots of tequila and I switched to wine. It went better with the cheese. I was going to have to hit the gym hard when I got home. And eat better. Not today though I was sad and there was free cheese.

As usual, I was asleep before we reached cruising altitude. I woke up with about five hours to go. Fingers crossed that helped with the jet lag. I put on my favorites playlist and read until we landed.

Emma ~ I’ve landed Sebastian ~ Yay! Emma ~ Go back to sleep. Sebastian ~ XOXO

I knew he had an early call time tomorrow. It was only five pm here in New York. Closer to seven by the time I got back to Sebastian's place. I made it long enough to throw a load of laundry into the washer and the cheese into the fridge before crawling into bed. I took over his side of the bed, sniffing the pillows to find the one that smelled most like him. I curled around it and was out.

Five am was the latest my body was going to let me sleep. That was eleven am in France. So too early for New York and kinda late for France. I grabbed my phone to take a sleepy selfie but was distracted by my text notification. Sebastian had sent me a picture of him reclining on a couch, not in our rooms, with Guiletta asleep on his chest.

Sebastian ~ Found someone new to sleep on my chest.

I continued with my original plan to take an up-close picture of my eyes peeking out over the top of his pillow. My hair was a mess, my eyes look half-asleep, and there was a faint pillow crease on my temple. Perfect.

Emma ~ I miss you too

The sun was up with a bright blue sky. Since it was Saturday the traffic at this time of day would be much less. I had a clean pair of shorts, but not a shirt. No problem. My boyfriend had t-shirts. A little big, but perfectly functional. Runners, earphones, keys and I was out the door for an early morning run.

The city was beautiful. sunlight crept around corners and over the tops of shorter buildings. I ran south past the 9-11 memorial to Battery Park. I'd always been fascinated by the metal world with tears and chunks missing. The first time I'd seen I'd said out loud, "It looks like the world blew up." I guess I wasn't far off. The sculpture had been in the World Trade Center Plaza and been damaged by falling debris. I was only eight and all I remember was my parents being glued to CNN for hours. It would be years later, when I called the city home, before I really understood. As much as a non-native New Yorker could.

The worst thing about running this early was all the stores were closed. The best thing about running this early was all the stores were closed. I admit my shopping had been out of hand. In my defense, it had been a very long time since I'd had someone to dress up for. Don't take that wrong. Beacon dates with a man or friends was an opportunity to dress up. Coming into New York to be with Angie and Eli was a good opportunity. Both opportunities I used well. Still, having a man appreciate what you wear and how you look in it is another level. I know what I look good in. I'm not changing my choices for Sebastian, or any man, but I will take his preferences into account. Shopping right now would be a bad idea. I’m sure I'm packing around a few extra pounds of cheese, bread, and wine. I'm hoping all the walking mitigated some of the damage.

On my way back, a couple of blocks from Sebastian's the city was waking up. More people and sounds. I realized tonight would be the first time I'd been alone in the city in about five years. I made plans to sit in the dark and just listen. I picked up a bagel and a smoothie that I was told would rejuvenate me. I wonder if the barista could tell? I broke into Sebastian's stash of nut butter. Half a bagel with cashew butter the other with almond. Cashew was better.

Being alone in his space is weird. None of my stuff is here. It's like a hotel, but not. I got a little nosey after I'd showered and dressed. Not in a going through his drawers and medicine cabinet nosey. Looking at his DVD and CD collection. Running my fingers down the spines of his books, pulling out ones that caught my interest to thumb through. I made a stack of things I wanted to read. I did go through his kitchen pretty thoroughly. It looks like a single man who travels and eats out a lot lives here. He doesn't have flour. How does one not have flour? He does have quite a condiment collection. I threw out expired things and made a list to replace them. That led me on a short journey to see if there was anything else he was almost out of and added things to the list.

Time to call the best friends. Angie picked up on the third ring, her voice excited to hear from me, "You're home!"

"I’m at Sebastian's. I meet with my advisor Monday."

"I want to see all the pictures and hear all the stories. We're going out tonight. Some friends are playing. You're welcome."

"Can I let you know later? I don't know what the time change is going to do."

"Absolutely. So.... " the paused after dragging out the word, "are you missing him? How was goodbye?"

"Goodbye took forever. Neither of us wanted to let go. At least half a dozen last kisses. Sucked. I miss him, but I'm okay. I'll be fine when I get home and am doing stuff. I've cleaned expired shit out of his kitchen and made a grocery list."

"That's cute. Hope he thinks so."

I hadn't thought about his opinion one way or another. I was just getting rid of shit before it stank up the place. "He won't care."

We talked for a while, deciding we'd do brunch tomorrow.

I was bored. I didn't lack for things to do, but I didn't have a routine here. Especially not without him. It didn't feel like home without him. Once I'd figured that out I was good and went about making myself at home.

I'd changed Sebastian's ringtone from "Dancing Queen" to my favorite part in "Every Time I’m With You." It was near the end after a heavy drumbeat "cause every time I'm with you I feel wanted. We could make believers if we dare. We're just two believers if we dare." It was incredible the first time we'd danced to it and it was incredible now. I heard it about six, midnight in France.

I'd barely registered his face before I heard his voice, "If I put that picture on my laptop and my laptop in the bed, I can pretend it's you."

I felt warm all over and smiled, "Yes, you can. Tell me about the first day of shooting."

"It was good. Long, but good. I'm comfortable with Jess and I like her direction." He told me stories that made me proud and made me laugh. "I did well today. What have you been up to?"

I gave him a quick rundown on my day, leaving the bit about making myself at home until last.

He closed his eyes and shook his head. "I can't believe you restocked my kitchen. Thank you. Do whatever you want to feel at home."

"What if I reorganized your drawers because your way doesn't make sense?"

"Have at it. I'll just think I forget and think I did it."

"And your kitchen so it flows better."

He shook his head, "I don't know what that means. Knock yourself out."

I laughed, "I didn't do either."

I loved the lines that formed at the corners of his eyes when he genuinely smiled. Like now, "I don't care what you do. I just want you to feel at home.”

Now we were where I wanted to be, "Here's the thing... my favorite foods in your kitchen, finding where I'm most comfortable to work on my laptop, and figuring out where has the best view when I want to relax with a book are good, but it's not enough. Doing all that did help me figure what's missing."

"What's missing and where can we get it?"

"It's free and I already found it. You make where ever we are home. You're my home."

"I'm your home." He looked a little dazed.

"When you were in my place I felt at home. At your parents, I felt at home. Being at your place with you I was perfectly at home. Paris too. Now I’m back and I did things to feel at home. Took a while until I realized its missing something. You. When I'm with you, wherever we are, I’m home."

I could tell he was processing, by the way his tongue moved, "I like that."

He kept thinking, squinting his eyes a little, "I don't know if you're my home. Not sure where home is. Sometimes I don't feel at home in my own skin. I like that I’m your home." He cringed, "The next couple of weeks are going to suck for you."

I banred out a laugh, "No, once I knew what the issue was I adjusted. I'm good now."

"You don't miss me anymore?"

"Oh, I miss you a lot." Were transitioned into silly conversation.

"Ok, good."

I gasped, "You want me to suffer?"

"Terribly." His eyes were wide as he nodded his head. "So much so that when you see me again you throw yourself into my arms and hold on so tight I can't breathe."

"Therefore making you suffer."

"Yes, please."

I did end up going out with Angie and Eli. Thankfully it was a jeans sort of bar. My hope was if I stayed moving I'd fall over, get a good night's sleep, and get back on New York time. It was a good fun night.

Sunday I took a run before getting ready for Angie to come over. I'd bribed her with her favorite home-cooked meal. I had her take pictures of me in various outfits around his apartment. At one point Angie rolled her eyes, "I can not believe I'm taking pictures of you rolling around in his bed."

"Six weeks, Angie. I suck at selfies. I need a stockpile to pull from."

"What you need is a class in basic photo editing on an iPhone."

"I know."

We went back to her place, stopping for supplies on the way. A few hours later we were feasting on cilantro lime salmon,  a creamy garlic parmesan orzo, and a greek salad. I've taught Angie to cook this several times, but she tells me it's never quite right. I think she skimps on the butter and that's a big no. And a healthy splash of the Sauvignon blanc lifts the whole thing a little.

Sebastian and I exchanged texts over the course of the day. A comment or question with stretches of time between answers. Mostly from him. I got excited when an unexpected text came through. His response to my dinner picture was a request for the same meal. Maybe with his parents.

Monday was a busier day. I had to dress like a doctoral student, pack my bags, clean up after myself, and plant surprises like the notes I keep finding in my condo. Mine are more fun. The green g- string from concert night is mixed in with his boxers. A couple of dresses parked next to something they matched well. A peach tank top mixed in with his workout gear. I had Angie take a picture in each room. Printed and framed them. My favorite is me sitting on the toilet. It has a lovely frame and is now on the wall across from the throne. I wanted everything ready for me to leave for home straight from my advisory meeting

My advisory meeting lasted a little over three hours. Three good hours. Dr. Kershaw had been appointed my advisor. I'd taken a class with her while working on my Master's and my second winter in Beacon, but at the time I'd been excited to work with students and studying digital classroom technology was something I wasn't wanting to explore. I wanted to be hands-on molding little minds and still wasn't sure what I wanted to do, but I'd enjoyed working on our team's website. Google Classroom was functional but limited by design. Three hours later I had it narrowed down.

Sebastian had texted me good luck this morning with a picture of his face, eyes closed and lips puckered. I'd sent back a picture of my legs, crossed at the ankles with my skirt draped to the side, while sitting in his favorite chair. I was more than halfway home when his ringtone came through my vehicle's speaker. I hit the button, "Hey, baby."

I could hear his smile in his voice, "Sounds like your lunch went well."

"It did!" I was still excited from lunch and the phone call with Angie after. "I like my advisor. There's only ten of us in the program with the plan to add ten more each fall."

"Wow!" He interjected. "So being accepted is even more impressive."

"Yeah." I was proud of myself. "Small and first-year makes everything very personalized. All of the potential classes overlap with other programs. Cognitive theory from Psych, advanced reading from Education, some Education Law and leadership, computer tech, and even game design. We spent a lot of time talking about what I’m passionate about. In the and I’m thinking I want to focus on reading intervention and programming for K-3."

"Which is what you're passionate about."

I laughed, "and you."

"And me. Did you just talk about direction or is there a plan? What coursework did they accept."

"The fifteen hours I've taken will apply. We designed a basic timeline. I've taken six hours the last two years. I'm confident I can handle that with work and having a life. If I want to take more I can. I don't want to take classes in the summer. Those are usually compressed and pretty intense, plus I'm not in a hurry. Somewhere in the middle, I write a thesis, which looks at a problem or a hole in what already exists. That will feed into my dissertation. I can either do research and design an experiment like comparing existing programs or create my own product."

"Any idea which way you want to go?"

"None at all. I figure the thesis will help figure that out."

"And when do I have to start calling you Doctor?" The seductive tone in his voice told me "have to" wasn't going to be a hardship.

"Three to four years. No summers and using the last semester for my dissertation is four. If I add a class in a couple of semesters or summer and do my dissertation concurrently then three. I have to be done in ten. I'm thinking I’ll figure out what I want to do the first two then design and implement the last two. A lot will depend on how long that takes." He couldn't see me, but I was waving a hand in the air. "It will work itself out."

"I love you."

"I love you. Enough me, tell me about your day."

We talked the rest of the way home where we had some fun.

I called Seattle and went through it all again with Ed. He was as excited and proud of me as was Seb. I found it a little sadly ironic that my lover was in a time zone six hours ahead, my family was three hours behind, and the ones in the same time zone weren't going to know for a few days. I didn't trust them to not take away from my accomplishment, neither did Ed, which meant they'd have to wait. Hell, they barely knew I'd been in France. They'd get to know once I was finished celebrating with people who would just be happy for me. That pushed a Georgia phone call off to the weekend after the volleyball tournament. Maybe after practice tomorrow if I could get my school lunch bunch to come for drinks, I’d even buy. I had no problem funding my own celebration. I just wanted my friends there. Angie and Eli were coming for the weekend. Maybe I'd call while they were here. Eli could make angry faces while Angie tried to scold him. Then either way it went we could drink our way through. That was a good plan. I texted all involved and they agreed.

I ran back out to the grocery for fresh berries, yogurt, and wine to go with my cheese. I bought other good for detox items and healthy foods. A stopped by a smoothie shop for a raspberry white chocolate protein drink. It was amazing how quickly I slid into my summer schedule. Run to the gym to work out. Run home. Have breakfast and practice guitar. Do whatever until it was warm enough to go lay by the pool and read or float. Have dinner, meet up with friends, volleyball practice, or lay on the couch with Netflix

Sebastian and I would text sporadically throughout the day. About nine my time, so three am for him, I'd send him a picture. One Angie took or something I'd taken during the day. He always woke up to see me. Some days that was more arousing than others. We talked almost every day. Maybe five minutes or an hour. Night shoots were the worst. He was working while I was awake and I was asleep during his time off.

The weekend Angie and Eli came down was fun. Friday night we stayed in watching movies and drinking. Saturday's tournament was going well until storms came through. The radar said there were hours of rain left, so they canceled. Since all our plans had been canceled we decided on a bar crawl. Which meant Sunday was spent recovering. We went to brunch at the riverside restaurant where Sebastian and I had our first date. On the drive back I made plans for calling Georgia. Angie and Eli were my get away plan. We went out on the back patio. I set up my iPad where they would only see me, but I could see my support system.

Dad picked up almost immediately, “Hey, Emma. You’re home. Amy told us you were in France.”

“Sebastian had an event so we made it a short vacation.”

“Sounds fun.” My mom had entered the frame. “I bet you appreciated things you overlooked before.”

I laughed, “I did. All those things I saw pictures of later and wished I’d paid more attention to. We had a good time.”

“That’s great.”

Time to dive in. “I wanted to tell you some good news.”

Amy jumped into frame and interrupted, “Can I hear too?”

I ignored the question and just went on, “I was accepted into a new Doctoral program at NYU. It’s education and digital media. It’s new so we’re building my program as we go.”

“That’s great news, Emma.” Dad looked excited, “Dissertation and everything?”

“Yes, it can be research or designing a project. I’ve got about three years to get that figured out. They accepted the post-grad classes I’ve been taking.”

“Congratulations, sweetheart. We’re proud of you.” Mom’s smile was bright.

“My baby sister is going to be a Doctor. I need to figure out my future.”

I shook my head, “You’ll figure it out. What’s right for you and my beautiful niece. She’s a job and a half.”

“I am not enjoying this age.”

“That’s why I teach first grade and not kindergarten or preschool.”

We talked a bit more about school, what was going on there, and how things were with Amy and Max. Mom asked about Sebastian, where he was, and if things were good between us. Instead of shutting her down, like I had in the car, I talked about him.

Not a minute after we hung up Amy texted, “How’s Sebastian feel about calling you Dr? *wink*wink*”

I sent back, “Exactly, like that.”

I closed my tablet and looked at my friends. I was not comfortable. Sure, the conversation had gone fine, but it didn’t feel fine. “That went better than expected.”

“This time.” Eli grimaced, “Sorry.”

“That’s what makes this so hard. This looks normal, but it’s not. If it was, I wouldn’t have this not in the bit of my stomach and want friends here when I talk to them. That’s not normal.”

Angie came over to kneel beside me, bringing me into a hug, “No, it’s not. You don’t need us when you call Seattle.”

Eli joined us, “I don’t think they know what they’re doing, but it doesn’t change it, Emma.”

I laughed, “I know.” I kissed his cheek. Dealing with my parents was worse for him than it was for me. I hated seeing people I love hurt too. I wasn’t hurt though. It was a weird numb.

“You ok, Em?”

I met Angie’s eyes, “I am. Just weird. The happier I am, the more good things going on, the more distant I feel. The better I’m doing, the less supportive they are.”

“Yep!” Eli didn’t hesitate to agree. “And that’s not alright.”

I mussed his hair, “No, it’s not.”

The next week was more of the same. I registered for my fall classes and my books were delivered by Wednesday. I started reading. Yes, I'm that student. I liked to get a head start. I'd never taken classes in the fall. The first month of teaching was exhausting. It took time and energy to get first graders ready to learn. I wasn't sure how that would work with starting my classes. Getting ahead on reading seemed the safest approach.

Thursday afternoon Sebastian called. Drunk. I guess wrapping in Paris was worthy of a party. The rest of cast and crew were packing up and heading to Rome. Sebastian was flying halfway around the world to San Diego's Comic-Con. He'd spend thirty-two hours of his four day weekend in a plane, which meant he was drunk and a little grumpy. By the time I was done with him he was still drunk, but no longer grumpy. He was naked, smiling, and satisfied. Well, as satisfied as he could be over the phone. Even drunk he was insistent that he not see me masturbating for the first time on video. We should have taken care of this.

I set an alarm for the middle of the night to make sure he was awake and would make his plane. It was worth it to lay in bed together.

[theladyofdeath]

Rags & Riches {10}

Summary: An A Court of Thorns and Roses Fanfiction. 19th century AU. Based on the prompt sent in by @cat5313 All characters belong to SJM, I am just a fan with a plot.

Warning: Mature content strung throughout.

A/N: 2 chapters in 1 day? Sure did. You all know how I feel about a cliche rain scene. 

Leave a comment to be tagged & tell me what you think! :)

The days after Feyre had met Isobel and Mor passed in a blur. She had not seen Rhysand at all, but he had written, saying that his mother was not doing well and he would be taking care of her.

The thought saddened Feyre, and it had become all she could think about. She had only met Isobel once, but she was a lovely woman who made Feyre feel cherished and made her laugh harder than she had in a long time. 

She also couldn’t bear to see Rhysand hurting, watching his mother grow more and more sick as the days passed. 

So, when she woke three days after Rhysand’s last letter, she decided that she should pay them a visit. After hurrying to the library and grabbing a book, she wandered to the kitchen, where she found the cook rustling about, making lunch preparations.

“Arnie, could I have a loaf of bread? And, perhaps, some lemonade?”

Arnie made the best lemonade. Feyre had asked him for it countless times throughout the fifteen years he’d been with them.

Arnie smiled, the wrinkles around his eyes deepening as he did so. “Of course, dear. All for yourself?”

“Thought I’d visit some friends in the village,” Feyre said, adjusting the hat on her head. 

“Very well, my dear,” he smiled,and got a canvas bag where he placed a fresh loaf of bread and a tin canister of freshly-squeezed lemonade. 

“Thank you, Arnie,” she smiled, graciously, before hurrying out the back door of the kitchen. 

“Be safe, my dear!” he called after her, waving her off.

Feyre remembered when she was a child, loving being with Arnie in the kitchen. He would always sneak her cookies and let her lick the spoon every time he made cakes or muffins. 

Her mother had caught her once, sitting on the counter in one of her finest gowns, licking a spoon covered in chocolate dough. She looked at Feyre, then at Arnie, and whispered, “Your secret is safe with me.” She left and never spoke of it again. Feyre couldn’t have been more than seven. 

The memory still brought a smile to her lips. 

It was late morning, and the clouds were gathering in front of the sun, but it was warm. Feyre decided to walk her normal route through the woods. She tossed the canvas bag over her shoulder and held up her skirt as she made her way inside. There was a soft breeze that was calming. 

Feyre loved being in nature. She loved the way the leaves rustled with the wind, loved the way the path was uneven, forcing her to climb over logs and through dirt. It was peaceful. It was real, far from their heavy golden curtains and marble floors. Even in her dress, Feyre felt more at home in the woods than she did in their manor. Perhaps one day, when she’s old and no one has a say in what she does anymore, she could have a little log cabin in the woods.

She wondered if perhaps Rhysand longed for such things.

Once the inn was within view, a soft rain began to fall. It was mostly blocked by the trees until she fell out of the woods and onto the cobblestone street. She hurried inside of the inn before she could get too wet. 

The inn was quiet, and Feyre saw no one as she walked up the stairs, down the hall, and to the final door. She knocked, softly.

A moment later, it creaked open, and Rhysand stood their, brows raised. “Feyre?”

“I’m sorry to just drop by, I hope I’m not intruding,” she said, in equal quietness. 

Rhysand smiled, opening the door further. She had never seen him so casual, in nothing but his shirt sleeves and loose trousers. His feet were bare. Even his hair was in disarray, as if he had woken up and immediately come to his mother’s side. “You could never intrude. Come in, please.” 

“Do we have a guest?” A soft voice came from inside. “Is it Feyre?”

Rhysand looked from inside of the room then back to Feyre, his grin widening. “She’s asked a lot about you these past few days.”

“And you told her all good things, I hope?” Feyre asked, raising a brow.

Rhysand chuckled. “I never lie to my mother, Feyre.”

He stepped aside and, with a laugh of her own, Feyre swept into the room. Isobel was indeed looking worse than she had the other day. Her skin was pale, clammy, her hair braided back to reveal dark circles beneath her eyes. She wore a nightgown and was bundled in blankets.

“Hello, darling,” Isobel smiled. “Do excuse me. I am not made for company.”

“Oh, not at all,” Feyre said, sitting in the chair by her bedside. “Pardon my intrusion. I heard you were feeling unwell and wanted to see how you were fairing.” 

“Not an intrusion at all,” she smiled, as Rhysand walked to the other side of the room and sat in an armchair, watching the two of them thoughtfully. “I’m feeling quite alright. Except for Mor had to go into town and leave me all alone with this one.” She gestured to Rhysand, who rolled his eyes dramatically. 

Feyre grinned. “Well, Arnie, my cook, made you some fresh bread and lemonade.”

“How thoughtful,” Isobel smiled, as Feyre put the canister and wrapped bread on the table near Rhysand before walking back to the chair by the bed and sitting down. “I also brought some poetry, if you wish to be read to. I….do not know if that is strange or not, but my mother used to read poetry to me when I was unwell, and now when me or my sisters are unwell, we read to each other. I always found it comforting.”

Isobel reached out a shaky hand to where Feyre sat and patted her knee. “That sounds lovely.”

Feyre nodded and took the book out of the bag. “Do you enjoy John Keats? I have always enjoyed his work.”

“Quite so,” Isobel said, thoughtfully, as she leaned further back into her pillows. “Ode to a Nightingale has always been my favorite.”

Feyre knew Rhysand was staring at her, and she suddenly felt nervous. She did not often read in front of others, never those who were not a part of her family. It had never been a strength of hers. 

Feyre cleared her throat, and began to read one of Keats’ most famous pieces. “My heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains My sense, as though of hemlock I had drunk, Or emptied some dull opiate to the drains One minute past, and Lethe-wards had sunk: 'Tis not through envy of thy happy lot, But being too happy in thine happiness,— That thou, light-winged Dryad of the trees, In some melodious plot Of beechen green, and shadows numberless, Singest of summer in full-throated ease.”

She finished and moved on to Modern Love and by the time she had finished that, Isobel had drifted into a comfortable sleep. Feyre slowly closed her book then looked to Rhysand where he sat on the opposite side of the room. 

His lips were parted, his chin perched in his palm on the armrest, one bare ankle tossed over the other, his legs outstretched.

He was watching her with such intensity and adoration that Feyre suddenly felt nude. She couldn’t breath, couldn’t think of a word to say. Instead, she took the canvas bag and put the book inside, then rose from her chair.

“I should go,” she whispered. “Let her rest.” 

Rhysand, as if just realizing he was staring, cleared his throat and shot to his feet. “It’s raining, you should wait.” 

Feyre glanced out the window and, sure enough, the sprinkling had turned into a downpour. “Not to worry. I came through the woods, the trees will block the worst of it.”

Rhysand smiled, softly. “I should have known.”

Feyre met him with a smile of her own. “I do hope she gets well soon.”

He nodded. He still wore the smile, but it no longer met his eyes. “Thank you for the lemonade, and the bread. And for reading. She enjoyed that quite a bit. Allowed her to forget about the circumstances enough that she could rest. For that, I am grateful.”

Feyre nodded, and before she could convince herself otherwise, she leaned up on the tips of her toes and pressed a kiss to Rhysand’s tanned cheek. “Until next time, then.”

Rhysand had frozen in place, and it was not until she was nearly out the door that she heard him say, “Until next time.”

She went back down the hall, and down the stairs, and still saw no one else as she got to the threshold. She looked from the edge of the woods, then up to the sky where thick droplets were falling from dark clouds.

It would be a quick run.

Feyre tossed the bag over her shoulder, now lighter due to lack of contents, and held up her skirt before hauling herself into the downpour. But she had barely made it a quarter of the way to the trees before the door of the inn burst open and Rhysand, still without socks or shoes, was running toward her.

His ivory shirt was already soaked by the time he made it to where she stood, his dark hair matted to his tanned skin.

Feyre opened her mouth to ask him what was wrong, but she didn’t have time. The moment she opened her mouth, it was met with his. 

She instantly fell into him, one arm wrapping around his neck, one hand pressed softly against his smooth cheek.

He gathered her close to him, those broad arms holding her tightly by her waist. She didn’t have to say a word as he put one arm beneath her knees and the other beneath her arms, lifting her in the air, her face in the crook of his neck as he walked back toward the inn. 

She had wondered what it would be like to kiss there, but that curiosity faded and turned to delight as she did so. His skin was warm, smelling of lavender. The moment her mouth touched the sensitive spot just above his collarbone, she could feel his breathing shift.

He took her up the stairs and down the hallway, stopping at the same room in which she had cleaned his wound.

He whispered her name as they tumbled inside, the door closing behind them. Feyre dropped her bag and undid the ribbon that held her hat as he pressed her up against the inside of the door. Her green skirt inched up to her thighs as she changed her position, her legs wrapping around his waist.

She felt wild.

Improper.

Irresponsible.

And she let it all consume her.

Rhysand’s violet eyes were bright as he took his lips from hers. They stared at each other a moment, both breathing heavily, until Feyre reached up and undid the top button of his shirt, then the next, and the next, until his chest was bare. He held onto her thighs, only letting go when each sleeve went down his arm, his drenched shirt ending up on the wooden floorboards.

Feyre traced his chest muscles, his abdomen muscles, his biceps, his forearms. She ran her fingers gently back up his arms, and over his shoulders. Rhysand shuttered beneath her touch. 

“Feyre,” he whispered. She could feel his heart pounding through his chest. 

“Let me down,” she breathed.

He obliged, and the moment her boots hit the floor, she turned her back to him and moved her hair out of the way. 

Rhysand hesitated before running his fingers down the buttons of her dress. “Feyre…”

“You have brought me to this inn on multiple occasions,” Feyre began, voice quiet, shaking. “Do not tell me you are worried about jeopardizing my virtue, now.”

He laughed, breathily, and dropped his hand. “I want to, Feyre. You don’t know how badly I want to, but-”

“I want to, too,” she said, turning to face him. There was no more sarcastic mask, no more snarky remarks or humor dancing in his eyes. He looked at her, completely raw as she leaned forward and pressed her mouth to his bare chest. 

He let loose a long, deep breath, one that completely halted when Feyre unbuttoned his trousers. He didn’t breath until the last button faded away and they were hanging loosely around his hips.

“Do you intend to kill me?” he muttered. 

With a grin, she turned her back to him, once again, and pulled her hair aside.

Rhysand undid the buttons, one by one. 

~~~~~

Cassian hadn’t seen Nesta since they were by the lake, days before. They had finished, and once she had caught her breath, she pulled back on her undergarments, straightened out her dress, and hurried away, leaving Cassian with his chest bare and his trousers halfway down his thighs. 

She had been blatantly ignoring him since, so he didn’t push. 

He stayed in his own little world. If she wanted to ignore what happened, then he would, too. 

Morning had turned into afternoon by the time Cassian had finished his chores, and he was packing up when his roommate showed up in the stables.

Cassian raised his brows. “Troubled?”

Azriel hesitated, then rubbed the back of his neck as he said, “I need your help.”

“Okay,” Cassian said. “Of course. What do you need?”

He hesitated again, which told Cassian that this was no small request. “Know what? Nevermind. I’ll figure something out.”

He nodded his thanks and began to walk away, but Cassian quickly caught up to him. 

Azriel looked unnerved. 

“What’s going on?” Cassian asked, stopping him with a hand on his shoulder.

Azriel could have put up a good fight, but he didn’t bother. He stopped, and turned to face him. “I have to get away.”

Cassian blinked. “What?”

“Okay,” Azriel began, taking a deep breath. “I’m...we’re leaving tonight, but no one can know. And I need your help.” 

“We?” Cassian repeated. “As in you and me?”

“No,” Azriel said, closing his eyes. “Elain and myself.”

“Elain,” Cassian repeated. Azriel nodded. “As in Lady Elain?”

“I will answer all your questions, okay? Just...I need your help.”

Cassian did not hesitate. “Okay.” 

~~~~~

Elain looked at the small travel case she had on her bed. Not much would fit inside.

She had thought of what she would like to bring with her, what to pack if she were never to come back to the manor. 

After a deep breath and a lot of deliberation, Elain selected some jewels and put them inside. She gathered her journal and all the notes she had saved from Azriel and put them inside of the case, too. A second day dress and a nightgown went in, and her hairbrush. 

And just with that, it was full.

She looked around at the rest of her belongings, of things so expensive but so insignificant. If belongings were what she was leaving behind to be with Azriel, then it was all worth it.

She wrote a letter to each of her sisters, in which she had given Azriel to give to his roommate, so that he could give them to Nesta and Feyre. 

Azriel trusted Cassian. So Elain did, too. 

She was excited, but she was equally terrified. She couldn’t sleep the night before, and every second that passed seemed to take far too long. 

By dawn the next day, they would be gone, far away from the manor, ready to start their new life. 

Elain would no longer be a Lady.

Instead, she would become Azriel’s wife. 

~~~~~

Nesta hated the very sight of him.

She watched him out the library window, discussing something with the handsome butler. When the butler walked away, Cassian looked up to see her sitting in the window.

He raised a brow.

Nesta’s book snapped shut and she stormed through the manor until she reached the side door, closest to the stables. She threw it open and stalked his direction, finding him leaning against the door of the stables, eating an apple.

“Done ignoring me?” he asked, mouth full.

Nesta rolled her eyes. “Stop watching me.”

“Pardon?” he asked, taking another bite.

“I’ve noticed you looking at me the past few days and I want you to stop,” she snapped.

Cassian watched Nesta as he swallowed his bite of apple and set it down on the post next to him. When he said nothing, it seemed to anger her more.

Throwing her hands in the air, Nesta said, “What happened between you and I will not happen again. Therefore, stop looking at me as if it will.”

“Okay,” Cassian said, crossing his arms. “Anything else?”

Nesta blinked. “You are absolutely filthy.”

“Well, I do work with horses,” he said, shrugging. “Shall I bathe in the lake again? You’re more than welcome to join.”

Nesta stepped close to him and pressed her finger against his chest. “You will not speak to me like that. I am a Lady.”

“Are you?” Cassian asked, amused. “You could have fooled me.” 

Nesta’s eyes narrowed even more. “You are foul. I loathe you.”

“The feeling is mutual,” he promised, then added, “my Lady.”

She went to pull her hand away, but he caught her wrist. “Leaving so soon? And here I thought we were having a moment. Is hateful talk not your love language?”

There was no one else outside, but Nesta could not risk someone approaching. They were standing far too close. They were touching.

She snatched her arm out of his grasp and took a step back, fixing her posture. She lifted her chin high and said, “I assume you have not told anyone about what occurred the other day.”

Cassian walked into the stables and began cleaning up supplies as he said, “Do you truly think me so careless?”

Nesta huffed as she followed him. “I don’t know. I don’t know you.”

“Don’t you? We’ve shared some interesting moments since my employment,” he said, grinning over his shoulder as he put a brush away.

Nesta shook her head. “I am not in the mood for games, Cassian.” It was such a rarity that she used his true name. “You mustn’t tell anyone. Swear to me.” 

Cassian sighed as he turned around to face her. He saw the fear she had, the fear that came from realizing that she was not perfect and hating herself for it. “Fine. I swear it.”

After a curt nod, Nesta turned her back to him and hurried away, back toward the house. She stopped, just outside of the stables. “Meet me by the lake. Just before midnight.”

When she looked back over her shoulder, his hazel eyes held a mischievous glint. 

She could feel him watching her until she disappeared through the door.

~~~~~

Feyre had not known what to expect when it all began. All she knew was that if pleasuring herself was invigorating, the pleasure of sex must surely feel the same.

But it was so much greater. 

Rhysand was gentle with her, at first.

He laid her down atop his bed and trailed gentle kisses down her body before guiding her toward him, and pushing himself inside. 

It had been beautiful. Sweet. Romantic.

Her heart had never been so full of emotion as they made love for the first time, and once they were done, and he asked if she was okay, she just laughed. 

“I am better than okay,” she promised, and he kissed her, softly.

The second time was not gentle, at all. 

Feyre found it even better than the first. 

Which could be seen from the marks she had made across his back with her nails. 

“I’m exhausted,” he said, flinging himself back against the pillows. “You exhaust me.”

“Perhaps I should go then?” Feyre asked, climbing up his body and resting her chin atop his chest.

Rhysand laughed, his smile glorious. “Please, do not. If you did, I’d be afraid-”

A loud knock came on his door. “Rhysand?” it was Mor. “Auntie and I are preparing for dinner. Will you be joining us?”

“Er,” Rhysand hesitated. Feyre had to put her hands over her mouth to keep from laughing. “I am getting ready to go out for a bit. I’ll be back soon.”

“Very well,” she called. “Don’t get into too much trouble.”

Feyre waited for her footsteps to sound down the hall before she asked, “You’d be afraid of what?”

Rhysand lifted a brow, gently rubbing her back with the tips of his fingers. “What?”

“You said that if I left, you’d be afraid. Afraid of what?”

Rhysand’s fingers slowed, but he didn’t stop. “That you wouldn’t come back.”

Feyre chuckled. “I just made love to you twice. Why would I not come back?”

Rhysand took her face into his hands and brushed back her hair. “You are too good a woman, Feyre Archeron. Too good for any man, especially me.”

“Although I agree,” Feyre began, making Rhysand laugh, “you do not give yourself much credit. I have seen the truth of your heart, and I quite like what I see.”

Rhysand’s brows went up. “Is that so?”

“It is,” Feyre confirmed. “Which is good, if I am to be your wife, after all.”

Rhysand’s body stopped, every part of him coming to a halt. “Say that again, I’m sure I misheard it.”

Feyre’s smile widened as she began, once more, “If I am to be your wife-”

“Stop,” he said, putting his hand over her mouth. “No.”

Feyre rolled her eyes. “You are the most dramatic man I have ever known,” she said, muffled through his hand.

Rhysand flipped Feyre onto her back and hovered over her. She trailed her fingers along his chest as he leaned down to kiss her forehead. “I have no ring,” he said, kissing her nose. “And we are at an inn.” He kissed her lips. “And I am nude.”

“As am I,” she said, giggling as his head dipped down to trail his tongue along one of her breasts, then the other. 

“I’ve noticed,” he said, the tone of his voice causing her toes to curl. “I must propose to you properly. You mustn’t know it’s coming. Besides, you could change your mind. You hated me up until today.”

Feyre shook her head, taking his face into her hands and pulling him down, so that her lips touched his. “I never hated you, Rhys.”

His eyes softened. 

“But I’m going to know it’s coming,” she grinned. “Were I not always meant to become your wife?” 

Rhysand let his body fall against hers. He rested an elbow on each side of her face. “From the very first moment I saw you.” 

The third time they made love that afternoon, all the walls had come down. 

~~~~~

@throne-of-ashes-and-beauty @mariamuses @a-happybird @amusicalbookworm @manoncrochanblackbeak @alifletcher2012 @candid-confetti @fandoms-everywhere-united @mis-lil-red @littlehoneyybee @abillionlittlepieces @impossiblescissorspeachpaper @awesomelena555 @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @tswaney17 @jemma-nessian-and-elriel @rhysandsrightknee @gendryaforthemasses @dayanna-hatter @thebluemartini @welcometothespeaknowworldtour @julemmaes @christiashadows @sleeping-and-books @itsme-malin @agnez312 @cat5313 @amren-courtofdreams @chemica @empress-ofbloodshed @islamonna @illyrianbeauty  @sleeping-and-books @queenofxhearts @sleeping-and-books​ @aedionashryver-wolfofthenorth​ @queenofillea1​ @mynewdreamwasyou​ @levivlio​ @hellolenas​ @burritowithfeels​ @that-other-pineapple​ @girl-who-reads-the-books​ @raghad-50725 @musicmaam @rowaelinforeverworld​ @negativenesta ��@welcometothespeaknowworldtour​ @gloriouspaintercreatorbandit @sannelovesreading​ @nerdperson524 @ireallyshouldsleeprn @nerdperson524​ @mariamuses​ @gorl-power

[vsquadgoals]

Settling Down (J.W) Part One

Milena was about to be a 25-year-old single mom. She first started a youtube channel to document her pregnancy but youtube slowly turned into a sort of therapy for her, she was going through this entire pregnancy alone and it was really hard for her but she had her friends, family and most importantly her fans to keep her from going crazy, they gave her so much support. Milena’s ex left her as soon as he found out that she was pregnant, they had been together for a year and when she found out that she was going to be a mom so young she couldn’t be happier; sure it was very soon for them to be having a baby together but she loved him so she assumed he would be happy too, boy was she wrong. He was furious, called her irresponsible and told her to get rid of it. When she refused, he left, and she hadn’t heard from or seen him since and she’s realized now that it was for the best, he clearly didn’t love her and she didn’t want her little girl to have a daddy that didn’t want her.  

Milena’s friends and family begged her to get back out there and start dating again, but who would wanna date a girl that was 9 months pregnant with someone else’s baby. It wasn’t until Alethea was 1 month old that she agreed to go on one date that her friend was setting her up on, all she knew about him was that his name was Jeff, he is 30 years old and he also does youtube. She wasn’t very keen on dating another youtuber, but she was willing to give it a shot, it had been close to a year since she’d become single and she was finally feeling ready to start putting herself out there again no matter how nervous she was. Thankfully her mom was in town visiting and she was going to watch Alethea while she was out, her and Jeff were getting an early dinner, she didn’t want to stay away from the baby for too long or stay out too late, especially since Alethea had just started sleeping longer at night she didn’t  want to mess with that.  

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay? Cause I don’t have to go.” Milena tells her mom once she’s finished getting ready. “Oh no, no, no. You’re not getting out of this date that easily; you need to start dating again my love. Alethea and I will be just fine here.” Her mom insists kissing her head before handing Alethea to her. Milena smiles down at the little girl before kissing her chunky little cheeks a few times and handing her back to her mom. “Please call me if you need anything, I can come right back home.” She insists before her mom is handing her purse to her and pushing her towards to door. “Say bye mama.” her mom says waving the baby’s hand for her causing Milena to giggle. “Bye mom. Thank you again.” She kisses her daughter’s cheeks one more time before saying her goodbyes and closing the door behind her. Milena sighs and chews her lip nervously making her way down to her car in her apartment parking garage. “Everything is going to be fine; this is good, you need this.” She says to herself once she gets into her car. She plugs in the address of the restaurant that she was meeting Jeff at before she pulls out of the parking spot.  

Jeff was sitting at his favorite restaurant on the outside patio waiting for his date to arrive. Jeff’s friend Jess set this date up for him and he was beyond nervous, Jess had told him that Milena was a youtuber and a single mom who just had a baby a month ago, that didn’t bother Jeff in the slightest, he loved children and he was ready to find someone to settle down with, he was getting too old to be messing around with these LA ‘models’.  Jess had also showed Jeff a few pictures on her and he was smitten already, she was absolutely gorgeous, her smile was the best he’d ever seen and she had the biggest brown eyes that he was sure he would get lost in if he looked into them for too long. Jeff watched the cars pass by on the street while he waited for her to arrive.  

Milena parked at the restaurant and sighed trying to compose herself and calm her nerves a little before she got out of the car, Jess had shown her a few minutes of Jeff just so she knew who she was looking for and wasn’t completely oblivious when she got there; she did have to admit he was gorgeous. She took a deep breath before forcing herself out of her car and toward the restaurant. Jeff saw her right away as she walked up to the restaurant, she was wearing a pink nude dress that hugged her curves in all the right ways, he couldn’t believe that she just had a baby, a hat and sunglasses. Jeff stood once she stopped at the opening of the patio and started looking around. “Milena.” He called waving at her a bright smile on his face. Milena could have fainted right then and then when she looked over to where her name was being called and she saw that handsome man standing at a table with a big smile on his face.  

Milena made her way over to Jeff and smiled her dazzling smile at him which made him weak in the knees. “Jeff?” She asks before he nods and pulls her into a side hug. He walks around the table and pulls her chair out for her and smiles when she sits before taking his seat across from her. “It’s so nice to finally meet you, you look beautiful.” He says causing her to blush and smile wider. “It’s nice to meet you too and thank you. You don’t look so bad yourself.” She teases before looking down at the menu. “So, what’s good here?” She asks looking at him over her menu. “Well they have the best bread here, so we definitely have to start with that. But honestly everything is really good here for their entrees.” She nods and smiles at him before looking back at her menu.  

They had finally decided on their entrees and placed their orders with their waiter. “So, Jeff, how long have you been doing youtube?” She asks once their waiter walks away. Jeff turns his full attention to her and shrugs. “I’ve been doing it for a couple years, I think. My friends got me into it honestly, I was hanging out with them and they’re always filming and they kinda encouraged me to start. How about you?” he asks unable to look away from her beautiful brown eyes. She’s the first one to break eye contact looking down at her hands on the table. “um, I started when I got pregnant with my daughter. It started as me just documenting my pregnancy and it just took off. I’m glad I started though, it helped me through a very lonely time.” Jeff frowns a little and puts his hand on hers trying to bring her attention back to him. Milena looks up at him and smiles shyly, she was nervous talking about Alethea, but she shouldn’t be, they were a package deal and if he couldn’t handle the fact that she had a baby then that was a deal breaker. Maybe she was just nervous of being rejected. “Well I’m glad you did, cause if you didn’t who knows if we’d be here. She’s a month-old, right?” Jeff asks trying to give her some kind of reassurance that he’s okay with her being a mom. As soon as he showed interest in Alethea Milena’s face lit up and she smiled wide. “Yeah, she just turned a month old a couple days ago. Do you wanna see a picture of her?” She asks and Jeff nods eagerly which made any nerves she had completely vanish. She grabbed her phone from her purse and showed him a picture of her that she had taken this morning of her in a little tutu. Jeff smiled wide and looked at Milena, “She’s so beautiful Milena.” He said his eyes boring into her causing her to blush again. “Thank you, her name’s Alethea.”  

They talked for what felt like hours, conversation flowed so easily, and they learned so much about each other that by the time they were finishing up with their dinner it felt like they’d known each other for years. After paying the check the two of them stood from the table reluctantly but Milena had to get home to Alethea. Jeff wrapped his arm around her waist. “Come on I’ll walk you to your car.” Her skin was burning under his touch, she never wanted him to let go. They walked to her car in a comfortable silence. He opened her car door for her, she turned toward him and smiled. “Thank you for dinner, I really had an amazing time.” Milena confessed to him looking at him feeling a little shy now. Jeff took her phone from her hand and put his phone number in it before handing it back to her. “I want to see you again. As soon as I can.” He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear before placing a gentle kiss on her lips. “Text me or call me okay?” he whispers against her lips; Milena nods and bites her lip before climbing into her car. “I will.” She says smiling at him as he closes her car door and waves to her before heading to his own car.  

Milena thought about his lips on hers the whole ride back to her apartment, she wished that the kiss could’ve lasted forever. She couldn’t believe how sweet and kind he was, or how interested he was in Alethea. She was in a trance when she walked into her apartment, she was only pulled from her thoughts when she heard the coos from her beautiful little girl. She slipped off her shoes and hung her purse next to the door along with her hat. She threw her hair into a messy ponytail as she followed the sounds of her little girl and her mom's voice. “Hi.” She says once she enters Alethea’s nursery where her mom is sitting with her in the rocking chair talking to her. “Hi mama! How was your date?” Her mom asks a wide smile on her lips. Milena scoops Alethea out of her mom’s arms holding her close against her chest rocking back and forth. She kisses her daughter’s cheeks a few times before turning her attention back to her mom who’s now picking up any toys or bottles that were laying around the room. “It was amazing mom. I like him a lot, he’s so sweet, and he wanted to talk about Alethea all night.” Milena coos unable to wipe the wide smile off her lips. Her mom smiles wide and hugs her daughter careful not to squish the baby. “Oh, honey I’m so glad. How about you put her to bed and then you can tell me everything.” Milena nods and smiles closing the door behind her mom when she walks out. Milena turns on Alethea’s sound machine that she can’t sleep without. She sits in the rocking chair and rocks her to sleep humming softly.  

Jeff walks into David’s house and plops down on the couch next to everyone, he didn’t plan on telling the group about Milena yet, he wanted to keep her to himself for now, it was way too early no matter how well the date went. “Jesus, finally you’re here. Where have you been?” David asks pulling Jeff’s thoughts away from her. He sighs and shakes his head. “Sorry man, I had some stuff to take care of. What’s the plan for tonight?” He asks trying to change to subject not wanting David or his other friends to pry too much into his absence. Thankfully David doesn’t pry, he just explains to plans for the night to Jeff telling him about some surprises that he has for a few friends and that they planned to end the night at saddle ranch as always. Jeff nods and agrees to the plans even though he’s not totally interested. David and the rest of their friend’s attention is turned away from Jeff and they all start bullshitting. Jeff is on his phone and looking through Milena’s instagram which he had to hunt down through Jess’s instagram, he follows her and likes a few pictures of her and then some of her and Alethea. Heath leans over and smirks looking at Jeff. “Who’s that?” he asks keeping his voice down trying not to attract anyone else’s attention. Jeff rolls his eyes. “Too soon, I’ll tell you guys soon hopefully.” He tells him before putting his phone into his pocket.  

Milena spends hours gushing to her mom about Jeff, telling her almost everything about him and showing her pictures of him from his instagram which she found after he liked a few of her pictures and followed her. The rest of the night he’s all she can think about, and she’s all that he can think about while he’s surrounded by his drunk friends at their favorite bar. Milena is sitting in the rocking chair breast feeding Alethea when she decides to call him, she couldn’t help herself, she barely knew what she was doing until she’s pressing the call button and putting her phone up to her ear. Jeff looks down at his ringing phone and excuses himself from his friends before running outside. “Hello?” Her heart flutters when she hears his voice finally pouring through the speaking and into her ear. “Hi, It’s Milena.” She says her voice soft trying not to disturb a half-asleep Alethea. Jeff smiles wide and leans against the outside wall of the bar. “Hi gorgeous.” He says smiling from ear to ear, she blushes and bites her lip. “I’m not bothering you, am I?” She asks realizing how late it was. Jeff chuckles a little. “Not at all, I’d rather be talking to you then doing what I’m doing.” this causes her to giggle a little and blush. “What are you doing up so late?” He asks walking further from the entrance of the bar. “I’m just feeding Alethea; she’s finally falling back asleep again.” “Oh, that’s why you’re being so quiet.” Jeff says chuckling. “Jeff? What are you doing?” Todd asks coming up behind him. “Hold on Milena.” He says into the phone before turning to Todd. “I’m just on the phone I’ll be back inside in a few.” Jeff tells Todd who looks at him and raises his brow before walking back inside. “Sorry beautiful.” He says into the phone turning his attention back to her. She finishes putting Alethea back into her crib right as he comes back on the phone. She leaves her room leaving to door cracked. “That’s okay. It gave me a second to put her in the crib.” Jeff chuckles “Well I’m glad she’s sleeping. So, when can I see you again?” Milena smiles and giggles a little. “You tell me, you’re the one with the busy schedule.” She teases.  

Jeff and Milena see each other almost every other day for a month straight but she still hasn’t met his friends and he hasn’t met Alethea yet. Today was the day that Jeff was going to meet Alethea and then they had plans to go to Scott’s housewarming party, he was having a lowkey pool party, so she was also going to bring Alethea. She was a little nervous bringing Alethea around Jeff’s friends, she was afraid of judgement. Jeff was so excited for Milena to meet the group; he had finally decided to tell everyone about her after they had hung out a few times and he knew that he needed to be with her. Everyone was so happy for him and so supportive even when he told them about Alethea, they couldn’t wait to meet her.  

Jeff knocked on the door of her apartment feeling a little nervous until she opened the door and he saw her beautiful smile. “Hi beautiful.” he said before pulling her into him kissing her lips softly. Milena smiled against his lips before pulling away hearing Alethea fussing. “Sorry.” she mumbles before going into the living room picking her up off the blanket she had on the floor. “She was doing a little tummy time. She hates it.” She tells Jeff giggling. Jeff closes the door and makes his way over to where she’s standing. “Well how cute does she look in that bathing suit.” Jeff coos running his finger over Alethea’s cheek causing her to smile. “Right? Mine kinda matches but it’s a two piece.” She tells him smiling. Jeff smiles and kisses Milena’s cheek. “Are you nervous?” He asks while rubbing Alethea’s cheek, she’s been staring at him since he walked over to them. Milena’s heart is melting watching Jeff and Alethea. “A little bit if I’m being honest. This is just really new to me.” Jeff nods. “I understand, but don’t be nervous, I’ve told everyone about you and Alethea and they’re so excited to meet you two.” Milena smiles and pecks Jeff’s lips. “Do you wanna hold her while I finish getting her stuff together? She looks like she really wants you.” She says giggling while Alethea reaches out to Jeff still staring at him. Jeff nods smiling wide before taking Alethea from his girlfriend’s arms. “Make yourself at home, I just have a few more things to put together before we can leave. If she’s too much just let me know and I can take her back.” Jeff waves her off, before sitting on the couch with the baby and holding her on his lap talking softly to her. “Tell your mommy we will be just fine, we’re practically best friends already.” It took everything in her not to break down and sob right then and here.  

Milena walks into the living room with Alethea’s diaper bag full of everything she needs for her and the baby. She brings the stroller out from the hall closet and sets everything by the door. She looks over at Jeff and smiles when she notices that Alethea is fast asleep on his chest. “I’ll take her and put her in her car seat.” She whispers smiling at him, Jeff nods and carefully hands over the sleeping baby. Milena puts Alethea into her car seat buckling her in and putting the cover over it to keep the light out.  

Jeff puts the diaper bag over his shoulder and looks at Milena smiling. She wraps her arms around his neck looking up at him. “Thank you.” she whispers looking at him with loving eyes, Jeff wrinkles his brows together. “For what?” He asks confused. “Just for being you, you’re already so good with her.” She bites her lip before leaning up and kissing him. Jeff smiles against her lips kissing her harder before pulling away. “Well I love her so much already, and I’d do anything to make you happy beautiful.” He pecks her lips one more time. “Let’s head out, everyone is already blowing up my phone asking when you guys are going to get there.” Milena giggles and nods, she grabs her purse, sunglasses and sun hat. Jeff takes the diaper bag and stroller letting Milena take the car seat down to the car. Thankfully Alethea stays asleep while they bring her down to the car and until they get to Scott’s house.  

Once they’re parked Jeff takes the stroller out of the trunk and opens it while Milena takes Alethea from the car seat trying not to wake her, thankfully her stroller was set up like a bassinet so she stayed asleep when Milena laid her down in it putting up the visor to protect her from the sun. “She’s going to be hungry when she wakes up.” She says to Jeff taking the diaper bag and putting it on the bottom of the stroller. Jeff nodded and kissed her cheek. “That’s fine, there’s plenty of places you can feed her, or outside no one is going to care.” Milena nods and smiles at Jeff. “Ready?” He asks before kissing her lips softly. She smiles against his lips and nods. “Ready as I’ll ever be.” Jeff chuckles and guides her inside while she pushes the stroller, they go into the back yard where everyone is talking and there’s low music playing, and tables of food set up. Jeff had told Milena what Scott’s favorite alcohol was, and she had picked him up a big bottle as a housewarming gift.  

Jeff lead her right over to Scott who was standing with Heath and Mariah. Milena lifted the visor enough so she could look in on Alethea before they started talking just to make sure she was still asleep. Jeff is greeted by his friends with big hugs from all of them, “Guys, this is Milena, Milena this is Scott, Heath, and Heath’s girlfriend Mariah.” He points to each of them as he says their names. Each of them gave her a tight welcoming hug as they said hello. “I’ve heard so much about you all it’s great to finally meet you guys.” Milena says smiling widely at them, she reaches down into the bottom of the stroller and grabs the bottle she picked up for Scott and hands it to him. “Congratulations on the house. It’s beautiful by the way.” Scott smiles and hugs her again, “Thank you so much!” Milena smiled and nodded. “Of course, Thank you for inviting us.” Milena turns the stroller and lifts the visor so that they can see a sleeping Alethea, “This is Alethea by the way, she should be waking up soon.” Jeff snakes his arm around Milena a huge smile on his face as she interacts to smoothly with his friends. Mariah covers her mouth trying not to squeal and wake up the baby which causes Milena to giggle. “Wow, She’s so beautiful.” Heath says also trying to control himself and keep his voice down. “Thank you, guys, hopefully she’ll be up soon so she can enjoy the pool, she’s never gone in one before.” Jeff watches Milena as she beams over her baby girl, he loved the way her face lit up anytime she talked about her.  

After talking to Mariah and Heath for a while Jeff smiles at the two of them. “Well I think I should bring Milena to introduce her to the rest of the group.” The two of them nod and Milena smiles at them, “Once she’s awake and fed I’ll find you guys.” She promises before following Jeff over to another group of people. Jeff’s hand barely leaves her lower back unless she’s giving someone a hug. “Milena this is David, Zane, Toddy, and Natalie. Guys this is Milena.” They all give her a warm welcoming hug just like everyone else that she’s met today. “It’s so nice to meet you guys.” Milena coos smiling widely, it made her heart so warm with how welcoming and sweet everyone of Jeff’s friends were being toward her. Jeff points over to the stroller and beams down at Alethea. “This is Alethea, the sweetest angel ever.” Jeff says causing Milena to look at him and smile. David doesn’t waste any time; he’s turning on his camera that is glued to his hand and is pointing the camera at a still sleeping Alethea. “Guys look how cute this baby is!” He coos, Jeff rolls his eyes and whispers an apology to Milena who waves him off and shakes her head. “She’s used to a camera in her face.” She says smirking.  

Milena has now been introduced to the rest of Jeff’s friends and they are all standing and talking getting to know each other. Alethea starts to fuss in her stroller pulling Milena away from her conversation. She lifts the visor and picks up her daughter putting her against her chest bouncing a little to calm her. Jeff stands behind Milena slightly so that Alethea can see him. “Hi Angel, did you have a good nap?” He says to her softy rubbing his hand over her back. “Oh, she loves you Jeff.” Heath says smirking at him. Aletha smiles at him with sleepy eyes and starts sucking on her fist. “I think she’s hungry.” Jeff says to Milena who nods smiling at Jeff. “Yeah she hasn’t had anything to eat in a while.” She smiles apologetically at her new friends. “Sorry guys, I’ll be back I’m gonna go somewhere to feed her.” They all nod and smile. “No worries.” they almost all say. Jeff leads her into the house and brings the stroller with him leaving it in the living room near the door to outside. “Can you grab her diaper bag please?” she asks Jeff as she sits on the couch. Milena sits Alethea on her lap facing her and smiles wide. “Hi mamas” She coos kissing her cheeks a bunch of times. “Ou I love you so much. I wanna eat these squishy cheeks.” She says before kissing her cheeks again. “Jeff chuckles and places the bag on the couch next to her. “Do you want me to wait for you outside?” he asks not wanting her to be uncomfortable. Milena looks at him and shakes her head. “No that’s okay. Unless it will make you uncomfortable.” Jeff shakes his head and sits on the other side of her on the couch. Milena takes her cover up out of the diaper bag and placed it around her neck before cradling Alethea on her arms and starting to breast feed her. She leans against the back of the couch getting comfortable.  

Milena looked at Jeff and smiles. “You know you don’t have to sit in here with me if you don’t want to. You can go have fun with your friends.” Milena says suddenly feeling guilty for keeping him away from the party. Jeff’s eyes widen a little and he shakes his head. “Absolutely not. I'm having fun being with you. And Alethea of course.” Jeff says before leaning over and tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. Milena looks at him with so much love in her eyes and she leans into his touch. “Do you know how incredible you are?” She asks him, taking her bottom lip in between her teeth. Jeff shakes his head and pecks her lips lightly, “You’re incredible, thank you for trusting me to be in you and Alethea’s lives.” Milena’s eyes fill with tears with Jeff’s words, she tried her best to blink away the tears, but it didn’t work. “Hey, Hey, don’t cry. I’m sorry.” Jeff wipes tears from her cheeks. “Did I say something wrong?” he asks his heart-breaking seeing tears on her cheeks. She shakes her head smiles at him. “No, you did nothing wrong! The total opposite honestly, I haven’t had a guy that is interested in being in our lives or someone that cared for Alethea as much as they have for me. I just am really grateful for you.” She confesses biting her lip, Jeff smiles wide and kisses her trying his best not to disturb Alethea. “I want to be in your lives, I want to make the two of you happy and keep you both safe.” Jeff reassures her kissing her again.  

Milena pulls away and smiles widely at him. She only breaks eye contact to check on Aletha who doesn’t seem to be eating anymore. She peaks into the cover up and giggles. “Hi pretty girl, are you done?” Milena covers herself before removing the cover to reveal a smiling Alethea who is now wide awake. Jeff chuckles looking down at her shaking his head. She sits her up and puts her on her shoulder burping her. “I just wanna change her diaper too before we go out. Sorry.” Jeff rolls his eyes. “Never apologize for taking care of your baby Milena.” Milena smiles at him before laying Alethea down on the couch and changing her diaper into a swimming diaper and putting her bathing suit back on. Jeff helps her put everything away and throws away the dirty diaper. Once he returns to the couch, he picks up Alethea from Milena and kisses her cheeks. “Wanna go swimming Angel?” He says to her kissing her cheeks again. “Oh wow, I get why you wanna eat these cheeks they’re so yummy.” He says to Milena causing her to giggle. Milena puts the diaper bag back on the stroller bringing out the two towels for her and Alethea then kisses Jeff before kissing Alethea’s forehead. Milena takes off her dress so she’s in her bathing suit.  

Milena is standing holding Alethea while talking to Mariah when Jeff snaps a picture of her laughing at something Mariah says while holding Alethea. Jeff walks over and kisses Milena’s head before taking Alethea from her, Alethea smiles and cuddles against Jeff. “Oh my gosh, that’s so precious.” Mariah says watching Alethea with Jeff. Jeff smiles and rubs Alethea’s back, “Wanna go in the pool?” he asks Milena and Mariah. Mariah shakes her head and smiles, “No I’m gonna go check in with Heath make sure he’s not drinking too much.” The three of them giggle and she heads toward her boyfriend. Jeff puts his hand on Milena’s lower back as they head over to the pool and slowly easing their way in. Jeff hands Alethea to Milena not wanting to scare her since it was the first time she’s been in a pool. Thankfully Alethea loved the pool, she was smiling wide and loving splashing the water. Alethea also loved when the group came into the water and were playing with her, letting her splash them and making her laugh. 

It was starting to get dark when Milena started packing up Alethea’s stuff after she laid her sleeping body in her stroller, thankfully she had a been changed into a clean diaper and her pajamas before she fell asleep. Milena made her rounds saying goodbye to everyone and exchanging numbers with most of them, especially Heath and Mariah who were practically begging her to let them babysit Alethea. Lastly Milena made her way over to Scott and hugged him, “Thank you so much again for having us. We had an amazing time and Alethea loved the pool.” Scott smiled and nodded. “You guys are welcome here any time. It was a pleasure.” Jeff met Milena at Alethea’s stroller helping her bring everything back to his car. Milena made a successful transfer of Alethea from her stroller to her car seat without waking her.  

The car ride back to Milena’s apartment was nice, Jeff gushed over how much fun he had and how much his, well their friends love her and Alethea. While he talked his right hand stayed attached to her thigh rubbing it softly while he drove. Once the pulled into the parking garage of her apartment Jeff helped her bring everything upstairs so she didn’t have to struggle.  Once they were inside the apartment, she carefully picked the baby up from the car seat. “I’ll be back.” She whispered before bringing her daughter into her nursery and placing her into the crib. She left the door cracked and made her way back to her boyfriend. Milena wrapped her arms around his neck and bit her lip looking up at him. Jeff’s arms wrapped around her waist holding her body close against his. “I wish you didn’t have to leave.” She said her voice soft; Jeff pressed his forehead against hers. “I don’t have to if you want me to stay. Nerf is being taken care of by Oscar, he’s editing tonight so he’s staying at my apartment.” Milena smiled wide. “I would love for you to stay, as long as you don’t mind a crying baby at least once or twice.” She said brushing her lips over his but not kissing him. Jeff ran his tongue over his bottom lip. “I don’t mind at all.” His voice was deep and husky now and his eyes full of lust. Milena reached behind him and locked the front door before taking his hand in hers and leading him to her bedroom.  

A/n: Let me know if you guys love it! 

[idjitlili]

Gonna need a wheel chair

Bard x reader

A request from @ifitaketwomoresteps​ 

“I noticed you haven’t wrote for bard *shocked emoji*can you write something fluffy and sweet for him?” I cant tell if this what you wanted ,i kinda went mental when i thought of a title...

summary:renting a room from bard only to come home ,to find a bunch of dwarves there,lets just say he doesnt like the looks the dwarves were giving you.

word count:1551 a/n sorry if this isnt great a request from tumblr ,it was my greatnans funeral ,and at the wake I ended up injuring my second biggest toe on a door. po tat TOE.  

Okay times were tuff in laketown,people could barely avoid to feed themselves,oh and you were worse you couldn't avoid to home yourself. You had been friends with Bard for many years,well your older brother was that how you knew him. Yeah brothers bestfriend you had developed a crush on him,but in the end he got married and had two children. You were beyond heartbroken,you bottled it all up to hide it from your brother,getting a job in laketowns only pub as a waitress.

At this point you were only a teenager ,you shoud not have fell in love with an older man,yeah. The reason you needed to work was simply you wanted your own freedom to go on adventures,and not live with your parents. Fast forward still saving ,when you hear news of Bards wife dying in childbirth ,he was a widow now. Is that what you call a guy with a dead spouse you werent sure.

In a couple of years later he comes into the pub ,starts talking to you,informs you of how he needs a babysitter for most hours in the day,due to his job. Yeah you were confused why he was telling you this,but it turns out he had spoken to your brother about it ,and he had informed Bard that you were saving to get out of the house. In which you would be happy with just a room,and this caused Bard to offer you a job as his childrens babysitter,and get payed and live with him for free.

You still on weekends worked at the pub,as those were Bards'  two days off in the week. This babysitting gig meant free home away from your parents, free food ,money ,only disadvantage was being so close to the man that didnt love you back.This carried on for a couple of years,in which you might aswell be their mother ,being the only motherly figure Tilda had ever known,the other too seem to like you but didnt warm up to you as quickly. Unknowingly to you Bard grew deep feelings for you too,but thought you would never return them as he was father to three children,what could he offer you but barrels from the elven king,Thranduil.

Your parents nagged you everytime they saw you ,asking when you would court someone,as they were scared not ever seeing you in a proper relationship. Your mother would ask if you liked Bard or how was bard oh how are your legs,can you still walk.It was horrific;in honesty.

However on this particular day you had cooked dinner when you had realised there was no more bread, so you would have to run out,telling the children not answer the door to anyone but you and Bard,as he was due back any minute. Only to your luck you had brought the bread ,heading back onlyto run into Alfrid who shamelessly tried flirting with you ,in which you told him "go brush your bloody teeth maggot" in which he did not like that ,and it ended up with you being pushed in the lake ,dropping the bread on the wood before hand.

Your outer dresses and corset pulling you done, making it hard for you swim up. The cold water over taking you ,only choice you had was to cut off the corset and outer dress with the knife located in your sock.

Alfrid laughing at you from the decking ,only to gasp when you come rushing up in just your now very see through dress thing,with shorts on underneath of course. Alfrid had began to walk away when you had pulled yourself up onto the decking grabbing a hold of him ,throwing his bloody hat in the water before punching him square in the nose. Him being a coward had almost fell over ,gasping ,kinda of crying before sprinting off like sonic in embarrassment. YOu had frowned in annoyance about your now ruined new dresses,before picking up the loaf of bread ,heading home.

You had tried to rush back without drawing to much attention the the dress ,and how awful you must look right now,you didnt want these people seeing your breasts.You had swung the door open ,loaf in one arm ,you sorta looked like the terminator,when he holds the present.

This caused a whole bunch of dwarves ,Bard and the childrens eyes to be covered to look at you wide eyed-wait why were there dwarves here. Bard had looked you up and down in shock before taking a blanket from sigrid's arms ,walking to you fast paced wrapping it around you covering you up.

"what in bloody middle earth ,caused you to run around naked?" Bard had whisper shouted at you making you flinch ever so slightly. " I went to go get bread for dinner then after Alfrid." you had whispered to Bard looking down in embarrassment ,you had hoped that he wouldnt have been home and seen so much of you. It was worse that so did a bunch of dwarves that you didnt know did too. "what did he do?OH MY-I'll kill him" he had turned literal red in anger,you had gripped his arm stopping him going past the door. "he only pushed me in the water , the dresses were pulling  me down, I had to cut them off. If anything he will leave me alone." you had smirked up proudly at Bard ,who looked at you confused.

"what did you do hm,y/n?" at this point he had pulled you into your room away from the eyes of the dwarves,some more pervy than others. "well first off so you aren't angry with me he was making a move on me again.  So I told him to brush his teeth ,and then boom im in the water so then I had to cut my NEW dresses to avoid death,then jumped out like a bloody frog and boom punch him in the face.I swear to god he started crying and ran away." he had chuckled at your emphasising gestures at the words new ,frog and boom,well those were only hand movements but he liked your description.

"he has done this before?why have you never said,I would have sorted him for you." he spoke brushing a stray strand of wet hair from your face with his rough fingers,making you lightly redden.

"yes multiple times, i'm a waitress it happens. Plus I didn't tell you because I dont expect you to protect me,its not your problem." you spoke slightly embarrassed walking to your draws pulling out a pair of trousers and shirt out,before sitting on your bed pulling the shorts off,bard would see anything because your dress was covering,pulling the trousers on. You had shrugged the blanket off standing up,going to pull the dress off,making Bard turn away.

"Its not like you havent seen me nude before. Remember when I tripped with stew and went to change and you burst in to see if I was okay or about the time when-""yeah I get it,its just not very polite to watch a women undress and not give her privacy." he spoke quietly,still facing away as you now pulled your tunic on.  In which you had turned him around ,pressing a peck of your lips to his ,before speaking "yeah ,unfortunately for me most of lake town and  a bunch of dwarves have seen pretty much everything." you began to walk away to open the door but Bard turns you to face him like you had done to him.

"I really cant tell was that kiss signifying you like me back or?" he had questioned you with his big green eyes,searching for any emotion. You had smirked up nodding ,you dont know what had given you that push to kiss him but it happened.  He had grinned widely ,following you . And with that you had walked out your room with the loaf still with you. Only for Tilda to running and jump into your  arms once you had reached the kitchen.

"DArn the bread is really squashed now." you had thought but you were happy ,you could already hear your nosy mouth asking "do you need a wheelchair,what kind of sausage is it german or- yeah lets not continue thinking about that. Anyways you end up travelling just not how you expecting ,uhh smuag the terrible. But after that you did go travelling to different kingdoms ,well you had to due to Bard being king of dale,but never less you got to see everything you wanted and you got a family with it.

[dandelion-vines]

Omg I love your shorts so much!!!!!! How do you feel about writing weight gain? Like geralt has been subtly fattening jaskier up on the road and loves his big tummy

I hyper fixated on the word “love” and now this is vanilla lol

Feel free to send in another more specific prompt, i can 100% write another thing with a kinkier take, just send in an ask :).

tags: use of the word fat, idiots in love, blowjob, cum play

Jaskier's a skinny boy. It's the first thing Geralt notices, the way he desperately grabs the bread off the floor, smacking away the dust and grime to take a bite out of it. He's fucking starved; obviously comes from a rich family if the clothes are anything to go by, but they most definitely don't support him anymore, what with the skeleton-like fingers and the sharp swoop of his cheek. 

No, a boy so pretty should be taken care of. No matter, it's not like Geralt can take care of him. He drinks his ale and resolutely ignores the fact that the pretty boy is walking over to him, a sway in his too-loose breeches.

Geralt heads back on the Path with Jaskier trailing behind him because fuck, if no one's gonna take care of the pretty boy, it may as well be him, then. 

They fall into bed together not three days later. Geralt's breath catches when he sees him in the nude, ribs visible through the thin of his skin, hip bones jutting at the end of a flat stomach. Geralt spends the night being oh-so-careful with him, gently cupping his hips as to not break him as they fuck. In another world, Geralt would have called it making love.

Jaskier makes him human. He makes Geralt soft, dammit, and witchers aren’t supposed to be soft. Bards, on the other hand, are meant to be fed fat and kept happy. Well, at least that what Geralt thinks; he's never really met any other bards. He starts slow, giving the starving Jaskier an extra half rabbit at dinner, fruit at breakfast and a sweet after every lunch. 

His coinpouch is fat, what with the sunny season bringing out every monster under the sky, and he can afford to splurge on his bard. 

Yes, his bard. They hold hands and call each other ‘darling.’ It's a disgustingly adorable, Lambert would say. Hasn't it only been a month, Eskel would ask. And to that, Geralt would say ‘yeah, so what?’ Jaskier thinks he’s ridiculous.

Apparently, humans moved fast in a relationship. Witchers didn't show see each other in the nude till the second year of marriage. 

Anyway-- he watches with a small smile as Jaskier digs into his slab of beef, moaning around his fork. Geralt sneaks half his own onto the bard's plate (Jaskier’s drunk enough to not notice), adoring the way his cheeks have filled out to be soft and supple, and how his rings are all the more tight now. 

He kisses his boyfriend ever so sweetly in their too-hard inn bed, and rides his cock as he watches the chub on his bell jiggle just barely with each of Geralt's movements.

"Geralt!" They're at the coast, spending their first winter together by the lovely seaside, and Geralt has taken impossible pleasure in not making Jaskier walk behind Roach and work the calories off of each meal Geralt feeds him. He walks into their bedroom, Jaskier pouting at the mirror with his old breeches pooled around his ankles. 

He's got curves now, and Geralt thinks the arch of his waist is breathtaking, the same adoration he feels when he notices the soft roll under the bard’s bellybutton fills him. 

Geralt smiles, draping himself over the bards back as his hands trail up the pale of his chest, letting his fingers comb up his thick hair, and come to cup the small tits that rest around his nipples. 

He hadn't noticed how big Jaskier's gotten, and apparently, Jaskier hadn't either. "This is all your fault," he pouts, "I'm ugly." He pokes at his stomach, tears welling his eyes as it jiggles. "I told you to quit with the sweets-- now look at me." Jaskier melts into Geralt's arms, pressing the soft skin of his back against Geralt's chest, seeking comfort. And Geralt thinks it's finally time to let him know just how he feels about him like this. 

"You're gorgeous," he mutters. And Jaskier clearly doesn't believe him, mouth set into a grimace. Geralt leads him away from the mirror and onto their feather stuffed bed, coaxing his lover into laying down. 

Geralt quickly shucks his shirt off, cock chubbing up as he straddles his lover's thighs. "Gods, look at you, you're so fucking fat.” He ignores Jaskier’s wince, holding him still, “So well fed," he murmurs, "so well kept." 

Jaskier chuckles breathlessly as Geralt kisses down his chest, nipping at his skin. "Is this proof that you take care of me? Is that why you're so enamored with it?" Geralt hums noncommittally, dragging the flat of his tongue up Jaskier's nipple. He smiles as he hears his bard's breath hitch. 

"Yes," Geralt sits up again, looking into ocean blue eyes and subtlety smiling lips framed by flushed, chubby cheeks, "but also because you look fucking hot like this." Jaskier sighs, and that smile spreads into a grin. He holds his arms up, thick where they'd been but bone, and waits patiently. Geralt leans forward, and hugs his bard back. They hold each other, Geralt pressing kisses along his shoulder. 

"You really like me like this? I thought you--"

"I fucking love you." Geralt wants to slap a hand over his mouth as soon as he says it, but he finds that it rings true. "No matter how you look, I'll love you. But my favourite is how you look now, how much there is of you to hold... I love it. I love this.” Jaskier’s breath hitches. "I want to cum all over it, rub my cum into it, gods, I want to watch your stomach jiggle as your ride me, wanna cuddle you and jack you off, have to push your cute little tummy out of the way to get to your cock."

"There's nothing little about it." 

"That's the best part." 

Jaskier grins at him, eyes twinkling. "Then I do believe you have a fantasy to fulfill, dear heart." Geralt swallows as Jaskier gets to his knees, watches with barely contained lust as his skin fucking jiggles with each movement. He ushers Geralt off the bed to stand beside it, and all the witcher can do is watch as Jaskier swallows his cock. 

His cheeks scrunch up as he sucks, bobbing his head down Geralt's cock as a hand works over the root of it. Geralt groans, thrusting up to the wet heat of his mouth, not quite sure where they're going, but ever happy to play along. Jaskier looks up at him, wrapping his lips around his cockhead and batting his lashes at him in mock innocence. He pulls off with a pop, one hand still working Geralt's spit-slicked cock off as the other pinches at his own nipple. 

"Do you like watching me play with my tits, Geralt?" He asks, voice low and ever-seductive. "Look at what you've done to me--" his hand trails down, resting over his the swell of his pubic bone, "I can't even get to my cock through all this, darling, it's actually a bit short, have you noticed? The root being swallowed up by my fat?" Geralt bites back a whimper as he throws his head back in a breathless moan. 

"Jaskier," he grits out. 

"Awn, are you close, Geralt? Do you wanna cum over my pretty tummy? Do you want to paint my tits and my stomach with your cum and rub it in?" Geralt groans as the hand on his cock speeds up before letting go completely. 

Jaskier leans back on the bed, hand fondling his cock as another pinches at his tit. "Cum for me, Geralt, cum over my pretty, fat tummy, fuck--" Geralt nearly scrams as he cums, forcing his eyes to stay open as his cum shoots over Jaskier's stomach, over his tits and over the fat above his cock-- he nearly collapses, lapping at Jaskier nipples as he spreads his cum over the swell of Jaskier's stomach, into each curve and thick stretch mark. 

Jaskier looks fucking wrecked, panting as he ruts against Geralt's abdomen, face scrunching up as he spills between the press of their bodies. 

He pressed his lips to Geralt's, chest heaving as he tries to catch his breath. "Well, I expect we'll be doing more of that?" They're both delighted when Geralt mutters a small yes. 

[horansqueen]

You & Me : chapter 22

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.5 - 4.8k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- notes: i havent even written half of what I wanted to be written in this chapter so they will have an other discussion in the next chapter, and they’ll spend an other day together. i feel like the song thing wasnt as good as it should have been. so i feel like it really sucks. i just hope it doesnt.

if you want to be on the list of blogs i notify when this is updated, just message me :)

requests! : heres the few requests i used. i suggest you dont read them before reading the chapters tho!

Chapter 22 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

Just as I opened the door to leave, I came face to face with Louis who rolled his eyes and laughed. I knew I should have left a while ago but the truth was, I hadn't shaved in 4 days and my hair was a mess. I was pretty sure it wouldn't bother Niall but it bothered me and I had to do something about it.

After trying out too many dresses, Julie, Eleanor and I gave up for the day and ended up at the restaurant with a few glasses of wine. We talked, we laughed, and I tried to keep the conversation as far from Niall as I could. I was still trying to sort out how I felt, or mostly, what I wanted, and I felt like it was something I had to do alone. I could lie and pretend I didn't love Niall but it was too late. In fact, I have never stopped loving him and I was not sure I ever would. Possibly, if we stopped talking and seeing each other, I could live with someone else, get married with someone else and be happy to a certain extent, but being around him without being with him would be impossible. I've done that for so many years before we started dating and it made me miserable. If there was one thing I was sure, it's that if I ended up with someone else than Niall, I would cut him out of my life for good. That thought made me want to throw up but I just breathed in, trying to calm myself. I hadn't taken that decision yet and I was not ready to, anyway.

"Five more minutes and you'll be late."

"I'm already late, Louis." I just said, shaking my head.

"Yea no, I told him half an hour, not 15 minutes like you had said. I know you and he does too. Don't lie to yourself, Olivia. You're always late."

"Well, i'm an artist!" I tried to defend myself with a small amused smile.

"Yea yea, use that excuse if you want." Louis chuckled, walking in. "Niall's waiting for you. Hurry or he'll already be asleep!"

"That drunk huh?" I raised my nose up. I sort of hoped we could have a discussion, or maybe I just wanted to feel myself beneath him. I was not sure. Either way, my plan was gonna have to change.

"No he seemed a bit better when we came back."

"Came back from where?" I frowned, tilting my head.

Louis' lips curled and he put his hands in his pockets before looking down and chuckling. He looked up at me again and laughed some more before shaking his head.

"No, no way, he'll tell you himself." he finally said, making me grimace. "He's got a surprise for you."

"Whatever, I don't have time to insist." I smiled and rolled my eyes, walking past him and bringing his face closer to kiss his cheek. "Thanks for calling me, Lou."

He turned around to look at me as I walked to my car and raised his voice to make sure I hear him.

"You take care on the road yea? Call me if you need anything!"

I smiled and nodded. "Don't worry. Now call your girlfriend!"

I quickly hopped in my car and drove to Niall's, feeling suddenly a lot more nervous than I probably should. I didn't know why, it was definitely not the first time I was seeing him, and everything was going so well between us, almost as well as it was before he broke up with me. Of course, we had many things to discuss again but we were on the right path, I could feel it. I shook my head, realizing I was talking about him as if we were dating, or at least, as if I was not supposed to marry someone else, and it made me feel guilty.

However, when he opened the door, all the emotions fighting inside of me suddenly disappeared, All I felt was love and my lips curled into a smile, just like his.

"Thanks so much for coming." he let out, moving a bit to let me in, and closed the door behind me. "I just want you to know that I was not jerking off to your nude. Louis just said that because-"

"He's an ass, I know." I chuckled before licking my lips. "Does that mean my nude was not good fapping material?"

His face changed into a few different expressions but finally, he raised his eyebrows and moved closer to me, bending down slightly to slip his arms around my waist and taking a step closer, forcing me to take a step back until my ass pressed against the couch.

"That nude is definitely great fapping material, I didn't say I wouldn't use it, I just meant that I was not doing it tonight, big difference."

My lips curled more and I chuckled as he bent down to kiss me. It was wrong, I knew it, but I couldn't help myself to let him kiss me and touch me again. I never had enough and I probably never would have.

"You're drunk." I let out before kissing him again.

"Mm, yea, a bit."

I laughed and shook my head. "Come on, let's go to bed yea?"

He groaned and his lips found my neck, making me laugh again. I loved how cuddly he became after drinking and I felt his mouth leaving small kisses on my skin, making goosebumps appear.

"Will you let me hold you and cuddle you?"

I smiled and nodded and with a low sigh, he pulled away. We walked to his room but kept the lights off and I helped him with his shirt and pants before getting undressed too, picking his shirt off the floor and putting it on. We both lied down in bed, facing each other, and I could see his drunk smile even in the darkness.

"Olivia, I love you. I think I always will."

I knew he was past the tipsy stage but I couldn't hide that his words made me smile. I moved closer and brought my hand to his cheek, letting my fingertips brush on it.

"You think?" I asked in a whisper, an amused smile reaching my lips.

"I know. I know I will always love you." he corrected himself, making me chuckle again. "And that nude, oh god, pet, just thinking about it makes me hard, look."

He grabbed my fingers before I could do anything and brought it over his boxers. As soon as I felt the shape of his cock on my palm, I moved my hand away. My heart had skipped a beat and I chuckled nervously before raising my eyebrows.

"Hey, don't do that!" I let out with a laugh, making him laugh too.

"You know I jerk off a lot thinking about you?" he mumbled. "That time you slept here, I walked to your room and saw you naked. Fuck, Liv, It got me so horny. It was the first time I saw you naked in over a year. I'm sorry, I swear it was an accident, but it made me so hard I had to jerk off in the shower."

My lips parted and my breath caught in my throat. I remembered that day very well... a bit too well. "You... wait, what?"

He groaned and moved his head before looking back at me again. "I know! I'm so sorry! I think I even moaned your name when I came."

I stared at him a few more seconds as his eyes moved quickly on my face. I pressed my lips together, feeling my heart thump hard in my chest as I tried to decide if I should tell him what I did or not.

"That day I... I sort of walked to your room to ask you for something and I saw you... in the shower." I admitted as he frowned.

"Really? How did you like it?" he asked, his lips curling into a smile. "You never told me."

I wanted to tell him that I actually touched myself next to him without him knowing but for some reasons, the words wouldn't come out and I stopped trying when he whimpered low and more closer, pulling me against him.

"Say you love me, petal. You love me right?"

I smiled a bit, leaving a soft kiss on his jaw. "I love you, Niall."

"I'm also the best fuck you ever had, I have to be." he added in a mutter, making me laugh this time. "I am, petal, tell me I am. I'm better than Louis, at least, yea?"

I moved back a bit to look at him again and frowned. I was a bit surprised by his request since he was never the type to be insecure and I just licked my lips.

"Does that really scare you?"

His face changed in a funny face and he shrugged. "Ha, no." he told me before his face changed slightly. "Okay maybe a bit."

I brought my hand back to his cheek and I suddenly got serious. I didn't want him to keep thinking about that, it was seriously useless to be scared of that.

"I love you more than I've ever loved anyone, and more than I'll ever love anyone else. And you're the best fuck I've ever had, and ever will have."

His lips curled into a smirk and he chuckled low. "I know. Now pretend I never asked."

I rolled my eyes and brought my lips to his, kissing him slowly as he answered my kiss. We didn't go further, we just kept kissing gently and deeply until we fell asleep and it was the very first time I had done something like that. When I woke up, the way I had fallen asleep came back to my mind and I felt a stupid grin draw itself on my lips. That was a bit embarrassing yet that was the most romantic thing we ever did together.

I got up slowly, making sure I wouldn't wake him up, and went to the bathroom before going to the kitchen with pills that I left on the counter. I finally made coffee and found eggs and bread, knowing he may not eat at all. I heard a groan behind me and I smiled despite myself until I felt his arms slip around my waist. His lips reached for my neck and I chuckled, moving my shoulder up.

"It tickles!" I admitted, turning to look at him with a smile. "Your stubble."

He laughed and moved away, grabbing a cup and filling it with coffee before literally swallowing the pills with the warm beverage. I remained silent and put the eggs in a plate, leaving it on the counter between us and grabbing the bread in the toaster.

"No thanks, just eggs is fine." he just shook his head as I handed him a toast.

He handed me a fork and we started eating together, still standing up and facing each other. I wanted it to be that way every single day of my life until I'd die. I wanted to wake up with him, eat breakfast with him, and spend the day with him. All my days. Every fucking day.

"What do you wanna do today?" I just asked, seeing him stop moving from the corner of my eyes.

"You're spending the day with me?"

I shrugged and pressed my lips together to make sure I wouldn't smile too big. "If you want me to."

"So many useless words coming from such a pretty mouth."

"Shut up!" I laughed. "You should have heard yourself last night!"

He grimaced and I laughed some more before shaking my head. I moved closer and wrapped both my arms around his neck, quickly pressing my lips against his. He closed his eyes and his arms slithered around my waist pulling me closer.

"What was that for?" he asked in a whisper, staring in my eyes with a smile when I pulled away.

"I was thinking of going for a walk at the park, and since we won't be able to do that there, I thought it was appropriated to do it here before we left."

His smile turned into a smirk and he raised his eyebrows. "You know what we could do before we leave?"

I laughed again and shook my head, taking a step back. God I loved him so much. How did I always feel so beautiful and desirable when I was with him was beyond me. At first, I thought it was just a way to see if he could still get me somehow, and then I thought maybe he just missed the time we were dating but now? Now I was starting to realize that perhaps it was just me. He wanted me, and he loved me. And that conclusion was exactly what I wanted.

"Maybe later." I proposed with a smile. "Let's go out. Fresh air will be good for your headache."

He groaned again and I laughed some more, walking back to his room to get my bag. I quickly got dressed, the smile on my face never faltering. Was that how it would be if I was with Niall? Would I always be happy, in love and excited to spend time with him? Realistically, I knew it was impossible to always be happy or always smile. Everyone had bad days and living with someone, or even just dating someone, was not perfect, but I felt like if I was with Niall, it would come very close to it.

He came back to the room just as I was done and started getting changed in front of me, making me roll my eyes but chuckle. It took him fifteen minutes to get ready as I waited for him next to the front door and when he appeared, my eyebrows raised.

"Wow, you look good." I pointed out.

"Those are just pants and a shirt. Why? Did you change your mind? We can spend the day in the bedroom if you want!"

I laughed again, perfectly aware that he wanted to go out as much as I did, and took a step closer before grabbing his hand in mine and staring at him. After about a minute, he frowned.

"What are we waiting for exactly?"

I squeezes his hand in mine and licked my lips. "Just trying to imagine what it would feel like to walk around with you while holding your hand."

"How does it feel?" he finally asked in a whisper.

I only send him a soft smile and let go of his hand before walking out of his house. He followed me to my car and I got behind the wheel as he took a seat on the passenger's side. He didn't comment but I knew he preferred when we used his car, perhaps it had something with keeping the control or something like that, but this time, I just wanted to choose the place. I brought him back to the park we had gone to meet last time and we walked around, enjoying the sun and the weather. It was quite a big and popular park but he had a cap on and I was clearly not famous enough to be recognized. I frowned a bit when he stepped out of the traced path to reach a part with a lot less people and sat in the grass as I did the same. We hadn't talked at all and it was not awkward. Silence was never awkward between us. After a while, I just lied down in the grass and crossed my ankles to stare at the sky. It took him a few seconds but he did the same and I noticed he had kept both his hands on his chest.

"That's a dragon." I let out, "A dragon who clearly doesn’t spit out fire. More like, bubbles or something."

I brought my arm up and traced the clouds with one of my fingers as he chuckled.

"That looks more like a snowman to me."

"A snowman? Do you have imagination at all?" I argued, raising my nose up before using a dumb voice. "Oh look, a cloud that's shaped like a cloud?"

He laughed too and I glanced at him right on time to see him lick his lips. "Okay, a few sheep then. And a fence." he paused. "Okay this one looks like two persons having sex."

"No, Niall, that's just projection."

This time, he let out a louder laughter and I smiled more. I turned back to the sky, feeling a cold breeze on my cheeks, and my eyes fluttered. My heart did exactly the same when I felt Niall's fingers grip my hand that was laying on the grass, between us.

"No PDA, remember?"

"Yea I'm re-thinking that rule."

I felt something jump in my chest as the surprise took over me but decided not to say anything. The more time I was spending with Niall, the more I realized that he had changed, and a lot. He was more mature, more balanced and clearly way more ready to settle than he used to be.

The day went by very well. We grabbed food on our way back, ate in the car and ended up at the movies. When we walked back inside his house, I felt tired and stretched with a yawn.

"Wine?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Beer is fine."

I followed him to the kitchen and sat on the counter as I looked at him open a beer and throw the cap in the bin. He took a sip and once again I rolled my eyes as he handed it to me.

"When I open it, there's a tax." he explained as If I didn't already know that rule. It had been instituted when we were teens and he had never stopped doing it since then.

"The tax could be something else than a sip, you know." I proposed with a smirk.

"Okay, show me your tits, then."

"You already took a sip." I pointed out.

"Take a sip of my beer and we'll be even. And then, show me your tits."

I laughed but ignored his request before I licked my lips.

"Yesterday you told me you saw me naked a few weeks ago and jerked off thinking about me int he shower." I told him, suddenly a bit stressed. "Remember?"

"Clearly."

I looked down at my beer as he stood near me, his right side leaned against the counter.

"I saw you in the shower." I added.

"Yea I remember you telling me that last night too." he smiled.

"Mm, when I saw you it turned me on. I.. I touched myself, too. While you were jerking off in the shower. I literally masturbated with you but you never saw me."

His lips parted a bit and he put his beer away before letting out the air in his lungs quickly. His eyebrows raised again and he moved between my legs, grabbing the beer from my hands and putting it away with his as he spread his hands on my thighs. He didn't say anything else, he just reached for the hem of my pants and immediately, I held myself with my hands on the counter and moved my ass up. He pulled on my pants, bringing my panties with them and let them fall on the floor before taking a step back.

"Get your feet on the counter, spread those thighs, darling."

I felt my heart jump in my chest and bit my bottom lip before doing what he asked. His gaze immediately dropped between my legs and he grabbed a chair, placing it in front of me before sitting on it. He made a quick chin movement in my direction before looking up in my eyes.

"Show me what you did." he let out. "Do it like I'm not here."

It took me a few seconds to react but I brought two fingers to my mouth, leaving some spit on them before bringing them between my legs. I let my fingers brush on my clit and slip inside me for a few seconds before going back to my clit. I couldn't take my eyes off of him and the way he was looking at me with a stoic face was driving me insane.

"You know, last time was easier because you were touching yourself."

I had no idea what went through his head but he kept looking at my fingers rubbing against my clit and slipping inside me alternately for a few minutes and finally took his cock out and started stroking it very slowly. The sight made a whimper escape my lips and my thighs tensed as I reached for my clit again. He looked amazing and there was nothing I wanted more than to watch him touch himself until he'd reach an orgasm except maybe feeling him inside me. My eyes were stuck on his cock and when he started leaking precum, I took my hand away from my pussy.

"I think you should come here and fuck me."

"No, you come here and sit on me."

I nodded quickly and moved off the counter before straddling him, still holding myself with my feet on the floor. He watched his cock enter me as I sat on it and let out a curse word as I quickly took my shirt and bra off. Once again, I was naked and he was completely dressed but I didn't mind. I felt at ease to be vulnerable in front of him, and that thought brought me close to tears.

I started moving up and down on him and I felt his hands run on my breasts, stomach, back an ass. He spanked me gently and then a bit harder, making me ride him quicker. It felt too good and my whole body started throbbing as I came close to an orgasm. He groaned and I felt his hands on my hips, helping me up. It made me frown but I followed his lead as he took my hand and brought it between my legs. I started rubbing my clit again and whimpered as I saw him jerk or again. I could feel the tip of his cock brush between my legs with each stroke of his hand and when he came, he pushed my hand away and I felt myself start shaking, his cum spurting against my clit as the tip of his cock brushed against it, helping me reach my peak too. I quivered and moaned, hearing him groan and the whole sight was just too hot. I knew it would probably make a mess but I really didn't give a fuck. I was panting as I slowly got down from my high and reached between my legs with my hand, my fingers brushing on my sensitive clit as I spread his cum on my pussy.

"That was so hot." I confessed in a whisper, making him look up in my eyes.

He got up without answering and grabbing my face to kiss me hard. I felt his cock press against my stomach and moaned in his mouth as he smiled through the kiss.

"Stay naked." he murmured as I nodded before I followed him to his room.

I saw him take off his clothes too and went to the bathroom to clean a bit before getting back in bed. He turned the lights off and we stayed together in silence, just watching the ceiling.

"Heidi sent me a picture of you in a wedding dress." he finally just randomly said after a few minutes. "That's why I didn't answer your text message, I was just so... flabbergasted by how good you looked."

I felt a wave of hated for Heidi for half a second but when I realized what Niall had said, it quickly vanished. I knew I looked ridiculous, no matter which dress he had seen me in, but the fact that he thought I looked great made my whole body feel warm suddenly.

"I want a future with you, Olivia." he just admitted, leaving me speechless.

He turned to me and pulled me closer before I heard him start singing. I closed my eyes to focus on his words and besides his voice, all I could hear was the sound of my heartbeats.

"My mind is complicated Find it hard to rearrange it But I'll have to find a way somehow Overreacting lately Find it hard to say I'm sorry But I'll make it up to you somehow

And I just don't know why The stars won't shine at night

Tell me you want it A thousand miles away from the day that we started But I'm standing here with you just tryna be honest If honesty means telling you the truth Well, I'm still in love with you

Did I miscalculate this? Let's just go back to basics Forget about what's come and gone 'Cause I hate to see us like this Breaking up on nights just like this We should be shooting for them stars of gold

So tell me you want it A thousand miles away from the day that we started But I'm standing here with you just tryna be honest If honesty means telling you the truth Then I guess we lost our focus And it's killing me that we could go to war like this But I'm standing here with you just tryna be honest If honesty means telling you the truth Well I'm still in love with you

Oh, we'll be alright Oh, it'll be alright Oh, we'll be alright Oh, it'll be alright

So tell me you want it A thousand miles away from the day that we started But I'm standing here with you just tryna be honest If honesty means telling you the truth I guess we lost our focus And it's killing me that we could go to war like this But I'm standing here with you just tryna be honest If honesty means telling you the truth Well I'm still in love with you"

I held my breath for so long I thought I was just going to pass out but I inhaled again when I felt tears fall down my cheeks. He sniffed and my eyes fluttered open only to see him crying. We just stayed there, laying in the dark, looking at each other, both crying, overwhelmed by feelings we didn't really know how to handle. I moved closer and kissed his lips until he deepened the kiss. I tasted the saltiness of his tears and he probably tasted mine, but we didn't care. All that mattered was his warm naked body against mine and the words he had sang to me.

"I love you so much." he sobbed to me in a whisper. "I wrote this the first day I saw you again at the bakery."

I wanted to tell him that I wanted it, just like he asked. I wanted to tell him that I was ready to jump back into this, to be with him and give us an other chance, but I just couldn't. I breathed in deeply and took a decision though. I was going to break up with Dylan. Clearly, it was not working and whether I decided to be with Niall again or not, I couldn't just keep Dylan around and keep on hurting him for weeks.

"That's one of the most beautiful songs I ever heard, Niall." I murmured, feeling my lips brush against his. "All of your songs for me..."

I cried again, letting more tears fall on my cheeks.

"We did lose our focus it's true... but it's back. I focus on you Niall. And you're right, we'll be alright."

I heard him break down again and it broke my heart. I brought my mouth on his against and we kissed some more. I felt his hand on my back and his fingers holding me so tight that they sank in my skin. I wanted to tell him how much I loved him but there were no words. I wish we could have a longer conversation and I felt like there were so many things left unsaid that clearly needed to be heard, but there was no way I was going to ruin this moment.

"I love you, Niall. We'll be alright." I repeated low before I heard his voice crack slightly.

"We'll be alright."

[iggy-licious]

One Shot: Hotline Connection

Here’s my next Iggy story… Iggy has picked up an interesting gig while he’s between record label deals. It’s veeery explicit, lots of colorful language. Just seemed right for the Ig.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hello, this is Jim… To whom am I speaking, and how can I make you come today?” He chuckles with a deep, throaty laugh.

Toni is elated and more aroused than she’d expected to be. She has finally connected with Jim, the phone sex operator.

Toni's best friend Wendy told her about the hotline. Wendy had flirted with Jim and brought herself to climax at the sound of his voice and his explicit instructions. She swore that it was just as good as her best face-to-face experiences with her lovers. Wendy's glowing review has Toni dying to experience Jim for herself. 

Toni has called the hotline over the past few days and has hung up whenever another man answered. She had been getting frustrated, always calling when Jim wasn’t available. Finally hearing his voice is the best news she’s received all week.

“I’ve heard a lot about you. I’m so happy that I've finally connected with you! I'm Toni.”

Wendy is convinced that Jim is actually Iggy Pop, and that has made Toni more curious. If Jim's voice were to sound anything like Iggy's sinfully testosterone-drenched baritone, Toni knew she'd be in trouble. And, Iggy or not, from the few words Jim has spoken so far, she feels headed toward a scorching interaction. 

“I love your voice, Toni. What are you in need of to get off?"

She giggles. She had not been prepared for Jim to be so direct. But it does fit for Iggy, she realizes. It’s still in the realm of possibility that it's him. 

“I love your voice, too. It's so deep and masculine… What a turn-on… Um, why don’t you tell me what you look like and what you’re wearing?” She downs a second shot of tequila.

Toni hadn't ever called one of these services before she started her quest to speak with Jim. She feels foolish for asking such sleazy questions, but the liquor in her system convinces her that it’s the right thing to do. And, she rationalizes, it's necessary to have a good vision of Jim to get the most out of the fantasy. Besides, Toni needs to know if her friend’s suspicion about Jim's identity is true.

Toni thinks it's exciting to be intimate with a seductive stranger, sight unseen. She waits for Jim's response and realizes she's holding her breath. His description could make or break the interaction. 

“Well, I am a little small in the old height department. Some people think I look kind of weird, but there are plenty of girls and guys who have disagreed with that assessment over the years…" He chuckles. "Athletic build, but kinda sleek, like a ballet dancer. Some asshole once said my dancing looked like Nureyev on bad acid." He drops his voice conspiratorially. "I also like to be nude a lot. It just feels right. I’m inside my house and not wearing anything right now." His devilish chuckle returns. 

Iggy or not, Toni feels light-headed as she imagines Jim's lean, bare body. Somehow she ekes out an unfazed "Mmm hmm…"

He continues. "I've dyed my hair black. Big, blue eyes. Some people think they're my best feature. And I know you're probably wondering… My winkie is pretty fucking big. Other people think that's my best feature..."

Toni’s heart skips, and her sex jumps for joy. She’s thinking it just might be him. Iggy. The irrepressible Midwestern accent sounds like his and, by his interviews, she knows that Iggy willingly calls his cock a winkie. There are very few grown men who would do that. 

"Now, what about you? What do you look like? It's no fun for you to have more information than I do." He complains in a teasing way that makes it easy to envision him pouting in his home. 

"I'm African American, a nice golden brown color, shoulder-length hair, brown eyes. Average height. Curves in all the right places…"

“Mmmm… You sound real hot!” he proclaims. “And I've always loved brown girls. Dated and mated with lots of them. So, now that we’ve gotten the preliminaries out of the way, are you ready to play with me?”

“Yes!” Toni responds quickly. “But there’s one thing I need to know…”

“What’s that, doll?”

“Well, ah, this is going to sound stupid, but are you…, uh… Well… My friend chatted with you, and she thinks you’re--”

“--That crazy guy from The Stooges who liked to stage dive and pull his cock out all the time? Guilty.” He drags out the last word and lust surges through Toni’s body. 

“Really?”

“Really.” It's another word that wafts slowly from his lips like the smolder of a fresh fire. It’s underscored by a deep, breathy purr, like a big, grizzled lion has been awakened from its slumber with a desperate need to feed.

“A friend suggested that this would be a great way for me to earn money and have a little fun. The music isn't progressing as smoothly as I'd hoped right now, so I thought, why the fuck not, you know?"

“Oh, my goodness! It's a pleasure to talk to you. I'm a big fan.” Toni is freaking out, but she’s also silently thanking her friend for telling her about the hotline and this very special operator. Toni is standing in her bedroom while she talks, but with this news, she has to lie down on the bed. 

"I don't tell people unless they ask, and I'd rather be making music, but I couldn't resist when they offered to set me up at home," Iggy explains. "I mean, you're a fan, can you see moi, sitting in some small, fucking cubicle like a good little employee to make some extra bread?" He laughs, and Toni does, too. 

"I was hooked with the first call that came in. I won’t say that it makes me feel powerful or anything, you know, but it does feel real good to know there’s still magic in my voice, even when the label execs are being pussies about getting my music out there. And, of course, flirting with horny callers is not a bad time…" 

Toni never thought she’d be seduced by a disembodied voice, but that’s what’s happening. Iggy’s baritone resonates in her body like a good concert sound system and stokes need inside of her in the most pleasing way. She gives kudos to herself for her persistence in finding Iggy, and her courage in confirming it’s him. 

“How long have you been doing this?” Toni asks. 

“It’s been a few months now. I think I might stick with it, even after the tide turns for my music again. I can work from home, talk to all kinds of people, and get them off with my voice. It's like a private concert with each one of you. It fucking rocks! And, like I said, the dress code… Or lack of one… Perfect for me." 

Iggy pauses, and in the handful of quiet seconds a series of sensual scenes and sweaty coupling positions flash through Toni’s mind. 

“Is there anything else you want to know?” he asks. 

"Do you ever get off when you’re doing this?" Toni blames the liquor and her growing wantonness for this question.

"While I'm on the clock?" He feigns offense before he lowers his voice. "A gentleman never reveals his secrets… But since no one would ever dream of calling me a fucking gentleman, why don't you give me your best shot and see what happens, babe?"

Fuck, Toni says to herself. She’d lose her mind if Iggy would interact with her in a real, primal way. She pauses and imagines a wild alpha of a man, urging her to a heated jumbling of bodies. Her breath catches and her body throbs uncontrollably. 

"You still there, horny girl? Come out and play…" He sing-songs his comment, and Toni snaps back to the present. She knows the reality will be much better than fantasy, even if the reality is limited to Iggy’s words and the sound of his voice. 

"I'm here."

"Good, Toni. It would be a shame if you were to leave without getting what you need from me… Any more questions, doll?" 

“Not really,” Toni replies.

“All right…Can I lead a little for our time together? That OK?" 

"Very OK."

"Perfect. You know what I want?”

“What’s that?”

“I’m not as hard as I'd like to be for you. I need to kiss you,” he purrs. “My hands are on your face, pulling you closer to me… Mmm… Your lips are real soft, just like I like ‘em… Can I put my tongue between your lips?”

“Please…” Toni sighs and makes herself comfortable on her bed after having another tequila shot. The floral pattern of the bedroom’s wallpaper begins to recede from her view as her lust leads her to tunnel vision--it's just her body, the phone, and the sexy musician on the other end of the line.

“That’s it… You’re so willing… So welcoming… Do you like how it feels?”

“Oh, yes… Oh, Ig… Jim… uh…”

“You can call me Iggy if it’s more fun that way. Whatever works for you, no big deal. Now, do you like how my tongue feels in your mouth?”

“Yes, Iggy… Mmm…”

“I should let you know that it's pretty fucking long, too. I'm very comfortable using it. Anywhere you want."

"Anywhere?" 

"Any-fucking-where," he rumbles.

This proclamation causes Toni’s body to tingle. It's only just begun, and she wonders if she can last until the end. 

"Let's talk about your lovely tits… I bet your nipples are real hard right now. Am I right?" He breaks Toni out of her lusty thoughts. "Feel ‘em for me.”

Toni takes off her shirt and bra, and brushes her fingers over her nipples. “Yes, Iggy. So hard. And, um…” She places a hand down her leggings. “I’m very wet, too. I just checked.”

“Fuck, you read my mind… Now, tell me, do you like touching yourself in that way?”

She pulls off her leggings. Her skin feels cool against the comforter as she writhes to the scene that Iggy is creating. She needs release and begins to take care of herself. 

“It’s so good, Iggy… I'm thinking of you, and…" Her thought is interrupted by an irrepressible moan. 

“Mmm… I can’t wait to get to your pussy… You'll get your chance to imagine me doing it, but right now I want to kiss you some more.”

“Are you a good kisser, Iggy?”

“I’ve been told so, yeah… It's something I enjoy. It can be almost as good as sex with the right girl. Almost.” 

Toni’s feeling flushed as she imagines her mouth locked with Iggy’s, imagines clutching the back of his head through the sheaf of his soft hair, imagines the pleasurable recklessness of his tongue. Iggy seems to never do anything half-heartedly, so she knows it would be a sublime experience.

“Oh! Naughty, naughty… Your tongue is chasing mine. Fuck, such a great kisser… I'm going to keep doing this for a while, while I let my hands do whatever they want to you… ”

"Yes," Toni barely breathes out. 

"Your skin is so soft… Mmmmm… Fuck, what a hot body you have… You're a real sexy girl…"

"You're so hot yourself, Iggy… You have such a beautiful, strong body... I'm touching you everywhere now…" Toni thinks about the muscular terrain of his torso, and she throbs inside more and more insistently. She answers her body’s call with an expert hand in her wetness. 

"Mmmmm… Let's lie down on my bed… I’m on top of you, licking those hard nipples. My, my, my, your moans, doll… I know it feels fucking good to you…"

"So good, Iggy… I'm kissing your neck… Oh! I have to clutch your back. I'm holding on, but I'm going to need you soon, need you inside of me…"

“Mmmmm… I'm afraid I'm going to make you wait a little longer… I'm nice and hard now, but I still need to explore your pussy, you know? Speaking of, I've got a couple of fingers inside of you… Fuck, you are really wet… Now I'm working your clit over… Oh… Need to taste your pussy, dear Toni… I can't help it…"

Iggy's breath comes shallow and rapidly. A soft growl escapes his lips. 

"Iggy, are you…"

"Yesss… He hisses through his teeth. "I feel so connected to you. I can't stop thinking of you and what I would do if I was really there..."

The admission is music to Toni’s ears. She imagines him stroking his large shaft and getting into a groove with one hand on his cock and the other on the phone. She continues to pleasure herself, reveling in the intensity of sensation but wishing he was really face-down at her entrance. 

"I'm so glad you're joining me, Mr. Pop. We'll have so much fun together…"

"Uhhhh… I think so, too, Toni… You smell real good, and your pussy tastes so fucking good, too… Fuck… So wet..."

"Keep going, Iggy… I'm holding you there… I'm grinding into your face…"

"I'm lapping at your clit… Sucking on it. And I don't have to ask, I know by your moans that you like it."

"Yes, Iggy!" Toni’s fingers dance across her wet, sensitive skin and settle on stoking electric fire through her clit. Her hips buck at her ministrations. 

"I wanted to make you come from eating you out, but I can't wait… Maybe some other time?"

"I'd love that. I know I'll be calling back again." Toni’s chuckle is husky with lust. 

"Mmmmm… I'm glad to hear it. It's a date, then…" He inhales sharply and a tortured exhale staggers out of his mouth.” Then his voice drops to a murmur. "I need to stick my cock deep inside of you. OK, if I do that now?" 

"Yes! Fuck, yes, I need it!"

"Uh…" Iggy exhales another ragged breath. "Do you feel it?" 

"Yes! Shit! You’re huge…" Toni knows that Iggy has exposed himself at many performances over the years, and she has heard about how shockingly endowed he is. She’s fantasized about him entering her before, and she can't believe she’s one step closer to that, even if it's a fantasy. 

"In that case, let me take it slow. I’ve got nothing but time. Mmmmm, such a tight pussy, Toni… I could stay here for hours."

Toni wails at the thought of him settling in for a marathon of fucking. "That's fine by me, Iggy…" She imagines he has relentless stamina, being as fit as he is. And she imagines he would know how to keep her wet in any way that would keep the sex going, probably in ways that would be new to her. Iggy is a machine onstage, and she’s convinced that he's also a machine in bed. 

“I’m grinding into you… Nice grip you have on my ass, doll.”

“I can’t help myself, Iggy… I need every last inch of you.”

“Trust me, that's not a complaint…” His breathing gets more ragged. “Mmmmm… Fuck a phone date, I wish you were here right now… I’m in NYC. Would you come see me sometime if I sent you a ticket?” He utters a long, guttural moan.

“Do you say that to all the callers, Iggy?” 

“Only the callers that make me feel this fucking good, and it’s a short list, doll. Just you. And that’s the truth.”

“It would be my pleasure.”

“Yours and mine both, Toni. That’s a guarantee.”

With that, Toni’s fantasy becomes more real, as real as it can be until they’re skin to skin. She inserts a couple of fingers inside of herself. She knows it isn't anywhere close to how Iggy would feel, but it will have to do. 

“Jim! Yes! Shit!” It feels right to use his real name, now that this is becoming something more than a simple transaction. 

Toni fucks herself a little more quickly. She’s soaked at her core, and so sensitive there. Seconds from paradise. She can feel it. She needs it. She can’t stop now. 

“Toni. Toni. Toni…” His breathy worship sounds like an incantation of a fearsome, powerful spell. “I’m so close… So fucking close…” He moans in a way that’s no simulation for a pay-by-the-minute interaction. 

“Me too, Jim." She imagines him, eyes wide, mouth agape, his hair plastered to his face and neck from his sweat as his thrusts become punishing. The image, and his shallow breathing on the other end of the phone are all she needs. An overwhelming climax wracks her body and soaks her sheets as her satisfied wail fills her room. 

"Mmmm… I’m glad you had a good time. What a beautiful sound, Toni… I'm imagining you flushed, on your back, legs still spread, maybe shaking a little… Your tits moving up and down with your breath… Ohhhhh…"

"You made me feel so good, Jim. Are you ready to come?" 

"Yessss… Almost… Fuuuuck…"

"Are you ready?" 

"Yes! Oh… Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!!! Jim shouts the last interjection before he exhales an exhilarated groan. 

He is silent for a moment, except for the sound of his breathing gradually becoming more gentle. "That was a hell of a nut, Toni. Fuck! Fuck, Toni!" He laughs in disbelief. 

"You made me feel the exact same way, Jim… My friend Wendy was right, you are the best."

"Ah! Thank you, babe. It's sexy girls like you who make this gig all worthwhile. Listen… I know you'll be hanging up soon… That wasn't a cheap line earlier, OK? Let's exchange numbers. I wasn't being a flirty rock asshole when I said I wanted to see you. I mean it. You got a pen handy?"

Jim and Toni exchange numbers and some more pleasantries while they gather their composure and make plans to meet.

"Well, OK, doll, the lights are flashing wildly on my batphone… Other callers coming in. Call me anytime before you hop on that plane in a few weeks. But do yourself a favor? Make it that private number I gave you. I need another date with you. No more waiting in line with the common callers." 

"Sounds good, Jim. I’ll call again soon. I can't wait until we chat again. Bye!" 

"Bye, Toni."

Toni hangs up before Iggy does. She takes one more shot of tequila and prepares to get on the phone again, to tell Wendy about her unbelievable call. 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #342

“in this farewell, there’s no blood, there’s no alibi  /  ‘cuz i’ve drawn regret from the truth of a thousand lies”

What’s your all-time favourite cartoon? Does anime count? In which case I'd say Fullmetal Alchemist, or the original Pokemon. If we're not including anime, then uhhhh Avatar: The Last Airbender, even though I have much more to go in the series. Have you ever taken dance lessons? What kind? Yeah, I've done a few for many years: jazz, clogging, modern, and hip hop. When did you last run and why? I literally couldn't tell you. I don't even know if I can run with the current state of my legs. My knees would probably crumple. Does your house/flat/whatever the hell you live in need cleaning? Not necessarily cleaning, but sorting. I still have boxes outside and inside my room of my stuff I need to put up somewhere... but whenever I prepare to do it, I just get so overwhelmed and shy away from it. Then there's the spare room, that's a total mess loaded with boxes and the like. Mom and I have just avoided it like the plague. Was your last relationship with a man or a woman? Woman. What do you think your next achievement will be? HOPEFULLY getting a job... Do you like mushrooms? NOOOOOOO. What dream do you remember most vividly? I'm not talking about it. Favorite kind of bread? Pumpernickel. Rabbits or hamsters? Rabbits. I've never met a nice hamster, and I just think rabbits are cuter. A movie you’ve never seen that it seems like every one else has? Harry Potter films. Favorite dog breed? I'm biased towards beagles. When was the last time you climbed a tree? Never, actually. Where I live, there aren't really many weighty trees with low branches. Just pine trees. Most common lie you tell? That I'm "fine" when I'm not. Ever seen your parents make out? Jc no, I'll take a hard pass there. Do you put your hair up a lot or down? It's too short to put up. Most of the time do you straighten or curl your hair? Neither. What piercing do you hate? I'm not a fan of cheek dermals at all, but you do you 100%. Were you raised in a religious house? Yes; I was raised Roman Catholic. Do your parents get mad when you're on the computer for hours? Mom used to for many years until I became an adult and she just realized it was in vain. I haven't lived with Dad since I was a teenager, but when my parents were together, he usually didn't say anything. Have you ever been asked for a nude picture? No, thankfully. I'd stop talking to the person immediately. What would you do if your parent hit you? I honestly feel like I'd slap them back and get the fuck out. Or just freeze in shock and cry. What's your most common mood? Stressed but distracted. Do you like poems? Yeah, usually. Ever kissed someone half-naked? Uh yeah. Have you ever been in a parade? No. Do you still play Pokémon? I play Pokemon GO, and I've actually been tempted to get out my DS and play one of the games I have (I can't remember which). I do find Pokemon games to be VERY grind-ey, though, so I can't play them for too long without getting bored. What is your favorite Pokémon? Ninetales. I also really love Espeon, though, and Charmander will always have my heart. Is there an animal you like that most people don't? Bats! :') Is there an animal that you think is overrated in terms of how it's liked? No animal is overrated. Have you ever "quit" a site and came back to it more than once? Uhhhh I don't think so. Do you have an "odd" fascination with anything? Most would probably consider "vulture culture" to be pretty weird, being drawn to dead animals and all... What's the hardest thing you've been through, & what did you learn from it? The breakup with Jason. I learned that some people make promises they aren't afraid to break, that someone can promise "forever" and not mean it, that the most unexpected can just snap their fingers and forget about you... I learned a lot. And most things, not positive. What are three "unrealistic" things you want most? 1.) To be able to financially support myself by just freelance nature photography; 2.) sooo many different kinds of pets; and 3.) to be totally rid of my mental illnesses. Do you take any daily vitamins? No, but I would if I was the one who bought groceries and stuff. I do however take Vitamin D once a week for my legs. Who are three of your favorite fictional characters of all time? JUST THREE??????? FUCK MAN idk. Uhhh well there's of course Darkiplier and Wilford Warfstache, then uhhh probably Pyramid Head. If you had to give the world a pre-existing mythological/fictional being, what would it be? Idk, I'd really need to be more educated on their lore before I made that decision. Do you have any desire to learn (a) foreign language(s)? Which? I both do and don't want to resume learning German. I got very good at it and could have basic conversations, but lack of application has slaughtered my vocabulary. Now it's like, it'd be nice to try again, but for what purpose? I don't think I'll ever actually apply it to my life, so it just seems like it'd be a load of wasted effort. But then on the other hand, I also feel that doing something you simply want to do isn't a waste of time. Idk. What is one of your firmest beliefs? Equality for all. No race, religion, whatthefuckever makes you more or less valuable than someone else. Do you have anything that keeps you from doing something you'd truly enjoy? Oh yes. Depression and anxiety, mostly. Do you work to fix your faults? Or at least, admit to them? I definitely try, and I'll certainly admit to them. How do you hope the world will change, if at all? I just want more compassion, less violence, more understanding... What is/are your view(s) on god, religion, spirituality, or relations to? In short, I believe that something sentient created the universe, and it/they/he/she/what-have-you just... let life play out from there, I think. I like to believe there's a plane of consciousness like an afterlife that exists, but if not, I don't really care. I hope the evil get what was coming to them, and the good get back what they gave, but maybe we're all better off without life after death. We'll all find out one day. Are you arachnophobic or scared of spiders in the least? Some, yes; others, not so much. This is very situational. Do you play WoW? What do you think of it either way? Haha, you're asking an avid player. I enjoy it, but not as much as I used to. At one point I was a Heroic raider, sometimes dabbling in Mythic, but now I'm just mostly a casual mount collector that likes chatting with my guildies and just doing dailies 'n shit. I owe a lot to the game, honestly; it helped me stay occupied throughout the breakup, and still today gives me something to do. What kind of computer do you have? Windows 7/Vista/XP/Other? I have an Acer Nitro with Windows 10. Are you taking any interesting classes in school/do you not attend? I'm no longer in school. If you don't attend, are you taking any "lessons" for anything? No, but I would like to join a photography course somewhere. A book/piece that has had an exceptional impact on your life? Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo just made me hate war more than I innately did. What genres of music are your favorite? Just metal as an umbrella term. Some heavy stuff, some less, some in the middle, some leaning towards other genres... but I just like metal. Do you think that fate plays a part in people's lives? No. Wouldn't "fate" just make it all... worthless? Like we're just storybook characters with a predetermined ending? What are your opinions on the media? One word: manipulative. What's a piece of technology you'd like to own? I REALLY want a PS4, especially lately. There's just a lot of games I REALLY want to play. Are you afraid of technology developing to where we're too reliant on it? We're already *too* reliant on it, which I do believe is a bad thing. I know, absolutely hysterical for me to be talking. What's your favorite odd ice cream flavor? I don't think I've ever had a truly odd ice cream flavor. There's this local place though that makes a kind that tastes JUST like s'mores, and I can fucking murder a cup of that. What's your opinion on stereotypes/labels? They're limiting and devalue uniqueness, imo. I know very, very few people who totally fit a certain stereotype, so why even bother. Like I don't care if you use them as adjectives to some extent, just don't put too much weight on them. Just be you. Do you believe that history repeats itself? It's not necessarily doomed to, but it happens sometimes, obviously. Would you rather learn from your mistakes or just undo them? Depends on the mistake. What was the most interesting class you had in school? Probably Mythology in high school. Do you write? If so, what? Yeah, meerkat role-play. And every now and again, poetry. Do you have a favorite culture? No; I'm not educated on nearly enough to pick one. Do you believe in global warming? Have you researched it? Lol no shit I do. I don't exactly think it takes much research to see with your own two eyes that it's factual. Do you prefer piercings or tattoos? Tattoos, if I had to pick. What comedy movie is your favorite? White Chicks. Have you ever meditated? Yes. Doesn't work for me. What comes to mind when you think of a great moment in your life? Realizing it was my choice to liberate myself and my happiness from my ex. He didn't and never should've carried it, because that's my right. What do you like about springtime? Aaaaall the flowers. <3 How have you handled having to stay in? It's not really different from my average day, so... How would your friends describe you? Quiet and overthinks literally everything. Have you ever hallucinated? When I was coming off a certain med in middle school, I saw black moving shadows. What (or who) is the best thing that ever happened to you? The partial hospitalization program I attended for two months following my suicide attempt. It's where I met my psychiatrist, who set my medication straight. Medicine besides though, I learned so many coping techniques and just how to deconstruct my trauma. As well as possible, anyway. What is the worst decision you ever made? Handing over the ability to make happiness for myself to another person. What is your favorite arcade game? Don't have one. Do you feel neglected? No. What school subject(s) are/were your best? English, Arts, Science. Are you allergic to pollen? Yep. What style of wedding dress do you like best? Probably ballgown. Are you over your first love? I probably never will be in complete totality. Do you always answer your phone? No. I only ever do if I recognize the number. Who was the last person you know to have a birthday? Today is actually my sister's birthday. What song is currently stuck in your head? I have Halocene's cover of "What I've Done" on a loop right now. It has me absolutely covered in goosebumps. Do you ever use coloring books? Not really anymore. Do you personally know anyone who is an author? Not to my knowledge, no. What’s your favorite kind of salsa/dip to go with tortilla chips? Just your normal, mildly hot salsa. Do you wash your car by hand or drive through a car wash? Mom's car hasn't been washed in... well, years, given its bumper. Mom worries that in a car wash, it'll be broken off (it is literally held on with a lot of zip ties and duct tape), and we ourselves don't want to wash it, so... Do you have any uncommon kitchen appliances, such as espresso machines, waffle irons, etc? I know we have one or two, but idk what they're called. What did your parents major/minor in in college, if they went? Dad never went to college. Mom changed her major a few times, but her latest was social work, I believe. Has either of their careers influenced what career you chose or want to pursue? Not at all. What kind of natural disaster is most common where you live? Hurricanes. Why is your least favorite season your least favorite? Because it's hot as fuck and humid. Have you ever had an animal get into your attic? No. When was the last time you started a “new chapter” of your life? I don't know. Hopefully I'll start one soon when I leave PHP and pursue a job... What room in your home do you spend the least amount of time in? I'm always in my room. Do you do anything to reduce the amount of electricity you use? I feel awful admitting I do quite the opposite... Being in the dark during the day affects my depression, so I'll have my lamp (or both) on even if it's just sort of shaded inside. Are you usually open to trying a new food that you aren’t familiar with? Eh, it depends on the food. I'm not very adventurous with foods though. Do you listen to Panic! At The Disco? I do. Have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity? ... It wasn't "kinky," but it was a dream lmao. Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you couldn’t say it back? That's how I ended the whole Joel childishness. Which friend do you confide in most? My mom. Do you wear a cross? No. What is your favorite doughnut? That's so hard. :( Krispy Kreme's normal glazed though probably takes the cake. I also love chocolate frosted and just totally plain, though. Do you have a hot tub? If so, where is it located? No. Did you read the Twilight series, or jump on the bandwagon after the movie? Neither. Do you or your parents rake your yard? Dad did growing up. Now nobody does or needs to. Who did you last go to the movies with? Dad, I think? What color was the last vehicle you were in? White. Do you have any family members in the military right now? No. Is there a ceiling fan in the room you’re in? Yeah. Have you ever heard voices? No. If you’re not straight, who was the first person you came out to? Sara. Do you remember the first time your first crush ever said hi to you? No. Do you ever go places with wet hair? Yeah, idc. Who is your favorite little girl? My nieces. What do you want the most in life? To feel like I made a difference, even a tiny one. If you could have anyone’s singing voice, whose would you choose? OBVIOUSLY Amy Lee's. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought that turned out to be a waste of money? *shrug* What’s something you’ve bought that turned out to be way more useful than you anticipated? Hm. Have you ever been on a ship? No. Would you ever date a disabled person? (Be honest) Yes. Would you rather adopt or have your own child? IF I wanted kids, which I absolutely do not, I'd rather have my own. I know I'd feel a deeper connection. What would you class as cheating on someone? As soon as you do/say something you don't want your s/o to know about, you're cheating. As far as earrings go, would you rather wear hoops or studs? Studs. Do you recycle? Yes. If someone dislikes you, what is most likely to be the reason? People have thought I don't try hard enough before. Do you put a line through your "7"s? Yes. ^ What about your "Z"s? Yes. What are you most known for? My art "skill," at least irl. How do you feel about shameless self-promoting? Depends on when, where, and how. As someone who's trying to be a freelance photographer, I get that it's sadly necessary, but there are some places it's just uncalled for.

[renee-writer]

William Chapter 6 About William

She wakes first and just watches him sleep. Her husband. A man she never thought she would lay eyes on again. The fact he now sleeps beside her, on his back with his arms crossed over his chest, like almost every other time she has shared his bed, is miraculous to her. She wonders if he still~ thinking, she reaches out and just touches his face. His answering smile causes her heart to leap. He is happy.

He wakes slowly. Stretching his arms over his head. Nude with the covers thrown off his constantly heated body, he is a joy to watch. She still wants him, a state of being she prays never changes, but this morning she needs to get to know her step-son, to see him through his father’s eyes.

“Good morning Sassanech.” His voice is hoarse from lack of sleep and the ever present desire.

“Good morning my love. Would you tell me about William.”

He laughs in surprise. It wasn’t what he expects her to say. “I expected another topic of conversation.” Said as he rolls to face her.

“I told you about Bree. Well I would like to get to know her baby brother.”

“I wish I could tell you some of the earlier things. If he crawled, when he first held his head up, that kind of thing.” He sits fully up and rolls his shoulders stretching his back out more. She sits up with him and, he is temporarily distracted by her breasts.

“I am sorry. Just tell me what you can.”

“Aye. Well, the first time I held him was the day he was born. His mam had just passed and his step-father and legal father was threatening to kill him. I shot the bastard and caught him as he fell. His eyes were a strange mix of his mam and I's, brown with a hint of blue. They are fully hers now. His hair, I was concerned, ye ken, that it would be red. A relief to find it dark. The curls, well they are in his mam's side too. I wished to unwrap him. To fully see him but his grandmother was there, pulling him out of my arms to see him alright. I couldn’t blame her. His grandsire, who passed six months ago, was thanking me. I couldn’t tell them why I shot him. It dinna seem to matter to them.

The next time I held him was on his first birthday. I caught glimpses of him, wrapped in his blanket, his hair or eye peaking out. I keep a close eye, fearing and hoping to see parts of me in him. Now that I have him, I do. Not just in his features but in his personality. That stubborn streak, it must be a Fraser trait.”

“Imagine that.” She lifts her eye to him and he laughs.

“Stubborn he is. Strong willed. He fights getting his clod changed but hates to be wet or dirty. He has an appetite but is picky about what he eats. Hates coos and loves chicken. I offer him green things because I recall what you said, that it is needed for his health. He eats some. Loves bread of all types. He has a sense of humor, has the sweetest laugh. His temper is like mine and Jenny's. He can walk holding my hands but no steps alone yet. Crawls all over the place. He babbles and sometimes I think he is about to say a word.

I am blessed, I ken. I will see his first step, hear his first word. I have the honor of raising him. And the honor of raising him with his sister and you. A triple blessing that I couldn’t imagine a year ago.”

“I know. I came here expecting to just see Jenny, Ian, and the babies. To have you and your son..”

“Our son.” He insists.

“Our son and our daughter raised together with both their parents. It is amazing.”

“Aye it is. I imagine they are awake. Shall we go see?”

“Yes let's.”

[artisticestheticreads]

ROXANNE: Chapter Three

A/N: Haiiiiiii, Loves. So,I know my third chapter is late but I been sick while working some crazy, long hours and was depressed all at the same time BUT I feel better now. So, here is chapter three.

Warning: Mentions about death, weed and drug use, sexual innuendos and more. 

Song Recommendation: I listened to Hey There, Lonely Girl by Eddie Holman.

Word Count: 4884

*Gun shot noises*

Erik was at the gun range, getting target practice trying to kill time before his “appointment”. He took his ear guards and shades off while pressing the button to bring the wounded paper closer to him. He placed the paper between his hands and smirked at the shots he made into a cross. He took the sheet placing on the ground beside him and adding a new sheet to the mix. He put his head phones back on with his shades, played his music and continued.

He soon found himself at a cemetery with peonies in hand. He walked up the deep hill; to a graveside with a tomb stone molded into the ground, two sat by one another.He stood with his hands in front of his pelvis and look down to see the names, Annie Marie Stevens and N’Jobu Udaku. He cleared his throat to stop the tears and said “uh, hey, ma. Hey, pop. I’m here for our monthly talk. Y’know like when I was younger. Well, life been coo lately and what not but, uh, I’m just trying to still figure out life I guess.” He looked around and all the tombstones and sighed. “What is the point of leaving life? We just all gonna end up here anyways. When we are long gone, is there actually heaven and hell or are we just done for? Do we become something or someone else or do out corpse just rot and decay away?” He shook his hand, stating “I still don’t get this shit, y’all. Life’s hard especially with y’all not being here. I mean y’all here but just... just not physically. There was so much y’all didn’t get to teach me. Like love and shit. I just wished we all had more time. Y’know I always wonder how life would be if y’all were alive, man. Would we be happy? Would I still be an angry ass person? Maybe not since ma was into self love and meditating.” 

He smiled at the thought of his family sitting on the ground, meditating early in the morning. He began thinking about Roxanne too out of no where and uttered out “I met a girl. Her name is Roxanne. This woman is bad and beautiful too. Her voice is like, is like honey drizzling onto some toast. Her eyes, they got so much passion and fire into them. Her smile is just like freshly cleaned diamonds and she just so beautiful. She strong too, y’all. She reminds me of…” He looked at his mom’s grave and sighed again, missing her more and more.

 Erik placed the flowers down on their graves and kissed his fingers to place by their names. “I hope I make y’all proud. See ya next month.” He began walking away when he noticed a golden miniature motorcycle that sat on a grave plot; something told him to stop and read the headstone. “To, a brother who made others smile. To, a son who warmed his mother’s heart. To, a friend who made people calm and to, a man who lived his best life. Here lies…” He stopped and knelt down when he read the last part. He read it again while holding his hands together. “Here lies, D’Angelo Fosters.” He shook his head while holding his hand to the grave and closed his eyes, mentally saying his hi and goodbye.

                                                     ______

Roxanne was in her kitchen, in a wife beater, no bra and booty shorts cooking lunch for herself and Raymond. She had her hair wrapped in a towel to dry it as her hips moved to her reggae playlist. She was in the middle of making ox tails, with dirty rice and corn bread. She was winding her hips to the beat of Bonafide Love by Beenie Man. She was feeling herself as she turned the music up louder.

“I don’t why. Ooooh whyyyy”, she sung with her hands out and wooden spoon tossing in the air. “Aye, sis. I’m ba-“, Raymond said but stopped when he saw his sister vibing. He chuckled as he gently put the bag on the ground. He slowly walked behind her and began dancing like her until she turned around. “Bumbaclaat! Ray, you scared the shit outta me”, she said holding onto her chest to catch her breath.

“You was gettin’ it. girl. I was like aight then”, he said chuckling as she turned around. “You idiot. Anyways, how was the gym”, she asked, stirring the rice. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and said “ah, man. It was whatever. Just like every other day. Of course, niggas was crowding up in there. Tryna pretend to be healthy and shit knowing damn well they ass gonna quit that shit in mid February.” Roxanne couldn’t help but laugh at that. Ray went over to the fridge to grab a water bottle and chugged it in one sip, shooting the bottle in the recycling bag. “So, how was the race since I can’t go up there?”

“Fine, 12 almost caught me but you know me. Gotta thank Erik for that.” Raymond looked to her with a rose brow and asked “Erik, Erik Stevens is back?” Roxxx nodded and said “yep and breathing too.” Ray slightly smirked and said “Damn, I ain’t see E in a minute. How he doing?” Roxxx checked the rice. “Good, I guess. He pretty cool. Just like bro said.”

“Invite him over”, he said as he took a spoon, dipping to the rice and eating a chunk before tossing it in the sink. Roxxx was mixing the cornbread batter as she spoke. “RayRay, he probably busy. Probably in some pussy right now.” Ray Ray smacked his lips looking her up and down. “Then he can come for dinner, Roxxx. C’mon I ain’t seen him in years. If you love me, you’ll invite him.” She looked at him and down and said “fine, I will try and invite him for dinner. No promises he will be here though.” RayRay kissed her cheek and ran to his room, leaving Roxxx with a smile.

                                                    _______

“Uh shit, daddy. I can feel you in my gut. Fuck”, said the light skin girl, nude and behind in the air. Erik held his fist into her lower back as they fucked to DaBaby in the background. He bit on his lip as he watched her pussy stretch around his dick, creaming all over. Yes, her pussy was good but he would get turned off when she ran. He would have to hold her in place.

All of a sudden, the ding from his phone caught his attention. He tilted to his right to see a text from ‘Roxxx’ with emojis of a chocolate and a yam . He began thinking about her so much at that moment. From her eyes, her frame to when she touched his marks. The way she smelled even made his dick hard. He smacked the girl’s ass, pretending it was Roxanne. He began pounding into her pussy as he thought about Roxanne. The way she took control in every situation got him about to explode all over. He muted out the girl’s moans and heard Roxanne’s voice in his head. He pounded in her harder while holding her hips close to him. He then released into the condom in one pump.

Minutes later, he locked up the house and lied in bed, freshly showered. He grabbed his phone and began dialing the number; he then heard “hey, baby boy. What’s up?” Erik chuckled and said “you like calling me that huh?”

“Maybe, maybe not. Anyways what you doing?” He sat up in bed, back against the headboard and said “shit nothing. Why? You wanna see me or something?” He chuckled when he heard her say “boy, hush.” He smirked as he rubbed his abs. “Well, I was wondering what you were doing tonight. You remember D’Angelo’s little brother right?”

“Ray Ray? Yeah, I ain’t seen him since graduation.”

“Yeah, well he wants to see you and invite you for dinner and whatnot. If you can’t come, I understan-“.

“Nah, I can come. What y’all plan on having”, he asked sitting up, feet planted on the floor. “I was thinking about making some pot roast, with potatoes and greens and rolls. Ray Ray wanted a cheesecake so of course I made one for later. Then I made some iced tea and what not.” The line got so quiet until Roxxx asked “you still there?”

“So when we getting married”, he said making Roxxx laugh. “Boy, I’ll send you the address.” He soon hoped in the shower again and threw on a crisp black tee, jeans and of course some all black Timberlands. He finished the look with his father’s chain and his matching watch. He looked in the fridge and grabbed a bottle of chilled Jack Daniels before heading out; he placed the address in the GPS and was off.

Erik soon pulled up to the matcha toned home and saw the garage door open. Once he parked in front of the home, he grabbed his gift and looked around as he got out. Coming from the garage was some Doja Cat playing; Streets to be more specific. As he made his way to the front door, he saw a pair of female legs under a car with her right knee bent. The car was lifted up as she worked. Erik walked up to her right side, biting his lip. He can see her print under her shorts and thick thighs slightly jiggling.

“Are you gonna say hello or are you gonna keep checking me out”, Roxanne said catching him off guard. He chuckled and asked “can ya blame me?” She rolled out carefully and looked up to him with her brown eyes. Erik liked seeing her natural beauty where he can see her beauty marks and apple cheeks more clearly with her hair pulled up in a high ponytail. Roxanne sat up on her elbows with a slight chuckle and said “do I have something on my face again?” He rolled his eyes with a smirk and helped her up. She wiped her hands on the towel beside her, clean and dusted her legs off. He looked down at her frame then back to her eyes.

“So, what you doing there”, Erik asked as he watched her. She looked back to the car and let it down before opening the hood and propping it open. “Eh, just doing a monthly check up for RayRay. He had some gas leaking so I fixed that up. Had to clean out the AC vent so the air got a lot cooler.” She bent down over the edge slightly with her flash light as Erik checked her out more. Her cheeks looked so nice and plump enough to bite and never let go. “Now, I’m just checking the alternator and making sure the car won’t overheat easily.”

“How you know so much about cars”, he asked once she turned around and wiped her hands again. She leaned against the car and explained. “My pops. Used to do a lot of work on cars, detailing and shit. He used to tell me ‘baby gyal, ya will neva need a man for any ting. Make dem need you.’ ” She smiled at the memory and Erik saw that twinkle again. “Is he still around or nah?” She was about to speak until they heard “aye, Roxy. Have you seen”, Raymond asked as he walked to the garage. His eyes grew big as he walked up to the pair and looked Erik up and down. Erik smirked and said “damn you got big, Ray.”

Raymond gave him a brotherly hug and said “welcome back, bruh.” Erik patted his back as Roxanne stood back watching. Erik looked at Ray and said “damn, you gotta be at least-.”

“16.”

“Yeah, ain’t seen you since you was like three almost. How Momma Dukes doing?”

“She’s good. I mean she in the hospital again and is in a home to be watched more but she doing better.” Erik looked to Roxanne then back at him. “Why she there?”

Roxanne looked at Ray and saw the hurt in his face as he looked at her. She rubbed his back and looked to Erik. “Ma losing her memory. Between me working every so often and baby boy in school, we couldn’t watch her all the time. She had slipped and fell apparently and was unconscious for hours until I got back from work years ago. She was out cold for like hours then when we took her to the hospital, we found out she had dementia.”

Erik looked to the pair and shook his head while saying “I’m sorry to hear that.” RayRay looked to him and smiled a little before he saw the bottle in Erik’s hand. “Is that for us?” Roxxx smacked the back of his head and he rubbed it. “Damn, bruh. I was kidding, sis.” Roxanne folded her arms and said “Ima kid my foot up ya ass. Go take the bottle and put in the fridge and clean up for dinner.”

“You ain’t the boss of me.”

“I promised ma I will be and I ain’t breaking my promise any time soon. Now go.” Erik chuckled as he passed the bottle to him and watched him walk away. “Mean ass”, Ray muttered under his breath and Roxxx threw a basketball at his back. “He must forgot I can hear anything.”

Erik followed her into the house and removed his shoes before placing them at the front door. Roxanne looked back at him and said “I see you was raised right.” He smiled and sat on the couch watching her in the kitchen as he got a text from the last jump off. Daddy, I miss that dick, he read in his head. He looked over at Roxanne as she grabbed the mitts and removed the pot roast, making his stomach grumble more. He made his way over and leaned against the corner as she stirred the greens. “You got it smelling good in here”, he complimented. She thanked him with a grin. “Who taught you how to cook?”

“Well, it was a combination of ma and my mom. Taught me all my life. I would just watch ‘em and all”. Erik looked around to see frames of multiple people but one caught his eye more. In the photo, looked to be an younger Roxanne with two other people. One was a man with soften ginger head of hair with medium brown skin. He wore a polo shirt with jeans and flip flops; the bottom was cuffed. The other person was a woman with skin like Roxanne and long braids down her back. She wore a long flow sundress that showed her frame; her and Roxanne could easily pass for twins.

Roxanne took noticed and said “those are my folks” as she drizzled juices over the roast. Erik looked back to her, with a wondering mind. He wondered if he should ask or not; he left it be.

Once they finished eating, Roxanne and Erik sat on her couch as Ray sat in his room. Roxanne came back from her room with a pencil case. She sat beside Erik as he poured the chilled dark liquor into the glasses. She opened the case to reveal a snack size baggie if weed, plenty of blunts and a R shaped lighter. She began rolling as she leaned her back against the couch. Erik took a sip of his drink and watched her. The concentration she had was immaculate. “So, what was the Navy like”, she asked as she lit the thick blunt and taking a hit. Erik took another sip and said “awe well. Kinda reminded me of MIT. Niggas tryna be all big and bad and shit. We trained a lot. I bulked up and grew my hair out.” She nodded as he thought to himself.

“Where are they now?”

“Who?”

“Ya folks”.

Roxanne still was rolling her blunt when she said “back home in Jamaica. We, uh, we got separated when I was thirteen. They ain’t had their papers, some folks found out and they were gone when I came back from school.” Erik noticed how her shoulders slumped but her demeanor stayed the same. “Sorry to hear that.”

“It is was it is. Niggas were upset to see a woman with her business of owning a restaurant and a man with a car appreciation business basically. I was put up for foster care and hopped around from home to home”, she said before stopping in mid memory. She looked to her dagger as Erik sat closer and rubbed his shoulder. “When did ma take you in?”

“Took months. I was hopping from Malibu to Vegas, the ATL and every where on this hell hole. My last name changed so much but then D’Angelo reconnecting when he saw me at the mall out here. I was down the way around that time. Been through some dark times, even thought about taking my own life until I got away. I was 17 and in a real dark place. Then ma took me but wasn’t able to be released until 18; but still stayed around.”

Roxanne passed the blunt to him so he can take a hit. Erik let the air out through his nose as he asked “when was the last time you saw them?” Roxanne took a shot of her drink and said “last year. I go out there every once in a while but since ma got worst, I gotta stay back and watch RayRay.” Erik leaned his head back looking at her face as she let out some air. “I race because my mom did it.” She smiled at the memory and said “I remember when my mom and ma was actually competing one another. My mom was a biker and that’s when I fell in love with it. She was incredible. Seeing her decked out in all black leather was like inspiration for me. My pop and I used to go a lot with her. Every race, she called us her lucky charms.” Roxanne looked over at Erik’s eyes and asked “tell me about your folks.”

Erik’s demeanor changed slightly but he pulled his eyes away from hers to look at the ceiling. “They dead. My, uh, my moms was murdered in prison and my dad was murdered in our apartment. They found these deep ass marks in his chest while I was playing basketball. Not sure what happened but when I ran up to get something to drink, he was drowning in his own blood. It was everywhere. Niggas took my dad out and I never found out who. I was just like you, hopping from place to place. Some were what ever and some was bad as hell. Had one family where they adopted all kinds of kids and made us food that was worst than the food my moms had when she was locked up. I had some dark times until my last guardian took me in. Some young cat, about 32 to at the time. Taught me how to be book and street smart.”

Roxanne looked over at him then at the tv screen. “Where he at now”, she asked folding her arms. He looked to her and then where she was looking. “Died years ago. When I was in service over seas.” She closed her eyes and took a hit of the blunt again, letting the smoke out. She shook her head as she opened her eyes and handed the blunt to Erik. “Life’s a strange thing, E. We are put on this world just to get hurt, to feel then to die. Makes no fucking sense. Never will. Like seriously what is the point of living if we just gonna rot in the ground anyways.” He looked at her to see her eyes on him and nodded, agreeing.

“So, E. How come you single anyways? I mean you seem like a cool dude”. She asked folding her legs together and looking at him. “It’s simple. Never could find the one. I like being myself. I like being to myself. Like staying lowkey. I mean I fuck from time to time but that’s just fucking to me; no strings attached.”

“Same here. I mean yeah I got my crew and Ray but sometimes I just like being alone. I can think clearly with a book and some bomb ass music while smoking or drinking ya know? It’s just that when I by myself, I feel like-“

“You can breathe with focus “, he interrupted to add and looked over at her as she smiled small. They continued smoking for a while listening to old school music. “Aight, let’s see if you got good taste. Top three old school r&b artist, go,” Roxanne said before passing him the blunt. “Easy, Joe, Tyrese, and Usher,” he said all confident before she smacked his chest. “Nigga, I said old school not 90’s r&b. Just for that you get no more weed”. He kissed his lips and said “fine, muthafucka. What’s your top three?” She looked at him and said “Marvin Gaye, Eddie Holman and Donny Hathaway, boom!” Erik shook his head chuckling and said “aight, but picture this. You get high as fuck right? What will be your playlist? Top 5, any genre of music, any decade.”

“Awe damn, E. Shit. Let’s see, um, ok I got it. Yearning for Your Love by the Gap Band, Frontin’ by Pharrell, It Was A Good Day by Ice Cube, Computer Love by Zapp and Roger and Time Machine by Willow. Your turn.”

“Aight, of course we got It was a good day, Hands on the wheel by Schoolboyq, Gangstas Paradise by Coolio, Passin Me By by the Pharcyde, I wish it would rain by The Temptations and , I guess, Stairway to Heaven by the OJays”, Erik said rubbing his abs through his shirt. Roxxx took noticed, bit the corner of her lip away from before taking a deep breath. “So, Erik. About ya marks, are they everywhere?”

He looked to her to see that she was looking at the ceiling. Her legs were wide enough for him to see her mound print. She looked good enough to eat, literally. “Nah, they not.” As he looked away biting his lip, Roxanne turned her head to him. “Did they hurt?”

“Nah, well only for like a second but the more I did it, the less it hurt.” Roxanne nodded in agreement as she started to play music, rolling another blunt. She hit shuffle on her phone and The Gap band played. She placed the blunt between her lips and lit the end waiting for the spark to pop up. She placed her lighter inside the box and leaned her head back on the couch playing the air guitar with closed eyes and tapping her feet. Erik watched her as he chuckled making her look at him with a smirk; she handed the blunt to him. He noticed the scars underneath her left forearm tattoo; he counted at least twelve. He took a hit letting the smoke leave his nose. Roxanne was too busy lip syncing the lyrics to notice Erik’s glare. Roxanne was a beautiful woman who was a boss all in one. She had everything he was looking for but it was too early to mention it. They only knew each other for like a couple of weeks or so. With eyes like the glass of Jack Daniels she held in her hand. Her lips would look like two plush pillows around him and with a body like hers, she would be the only woman he fucked with. Erik always had a thing for independent women because it showed they didn’t need a man or anyone to be around so it made him feel special in a way.

  For hours, they just sat in comfortable silence, enjoying one another’s company. Roxanne was hanging off the couch with legs on the wall while Erik rested his head on her legs looking at the window, at the dark skies. “Aye, Roxxx?” She looked up at him like in slow motion and said “yeah?” His eyes fell on hers and said “we been getting fucked up all day, ma.” He smirked and she started laughing, agreeing with him. “Shit, the sun just said fuck y’all niggas, I’m going to bed”, she commented making him laugh. “Like I’m out this bitch. Y’all with the shenanigans”; they laughed again out loud enough for Ray Ray to come out. He was dress in a clean tee and sweats as he rose his brow to them. “Y’all niggas fucked up, man.” Erik and Roxxx looked at him and started laughing again.

Ray Ray rolled his eyes as he made his way to the door and he opened it, he reached out for a slender woman’s waist. Roxxx looked towards the door when she took in the faint smell of Bath & Body Works’ Japanese Cherry Blossom body spray, making her sit all the way up. The woman had icy blonde hair and medium brown skin. She wore a green tube top, jeans that hugged her curves and matching fuzzy slides. “There go my baby”, RayRay said kissing in her neck. She giggled while trying to get out of his grasps. Erik looked over at Roxanne who held a stank, irritated face; he chuckled while leaning back. RayRay looked into Erik’s face and said “Erik, this is my baby, Angelica. Angel, this is my brother, E.”

 Angel saw Erik on the couch and said “hello, Erik. I see Roxxx finally found a man instead of acting like one.” Roxanne was about to hop off the couch with her knife but was pulled back by Erik. Erik whispered in her ear low enough for the others to not hear. “Chill. We good, aight.” She looked back at him then rolled her eyes leaning forward. “And it look like ya finally got some good hair instead of that dusty crusty one you been rocking since Obama was in office the first time, huh?” Raymond chuckled but waved it off. “Sis, chill. My baby still looked good.”

“Since when has she every looked good. I’m amazed her pussy ain’t start a huge as tornado with all that hot air going in and out. More niggas ran through her than a white bitch in an all black porno gang bang.” Erik spit out his drink before covering his mouth. Angel placed her hands on her hips and said “you got jokes, huh? Well, I got one for ya. What you call a bitch that ain’t had dick since the ‘incident’?” Roxxx looked up at her with an irritated look then to Raymond. “You told her about that?” Raymond looked to her and said “nah, she probably over heard-“.

“Over heard what”; he was silent looking at Angel. Roxxx leaned forward picking up a new wrap as Erik watched. “Raymond, you need to go pack a bag. You need stay with that bitch for the week.” Roxanne began wrapping the blunt as Ray shook his head before looking to Angel, signaling her to go to the car; she went as he went to pack a bag and leave, slamming the door shut. Roxanne’s lit the blunt between her lips and lied back. Erik wondered what they all meant but decided it wasn’t his place. “You good, Roxxx”, he asked with a rose brow. She looked to him and said “I’m good. Just-“, she stopped and blinked away a tear he couldn’t see on the other side of her face. She stood up and handed him the blunt before saying “you can stay the night if ya want. We been drinking all day and I can’t let anyone get hurt drinking and driving out here.” He nodded and said “I’m down” She took a deep breath, clearing her throat and said “I’ll go get you some blankets and shit. I- uh- just washed so you good.” She smirked a little before straightening her face again and going to fetch the new sheets.

 Hours later, Erik was lying on the couch with his tall frame knocked out as Hey There Lonely Girl by Eddie Holman played from her room. Roxanne looked up to the ceiling in deep thought, right arm behind her head and left head arm resting against her stomach. Her lips were tight as she bit on her bottom one, nostrils flaring and eyes red, soaked with tears and brows stitched in anger.

~

I hope y’all enjoyed this chapter because the next would definitely make ya emotions stir up. 

*𝕋𝔸𝔾𝔾𝔼𝔻 𝕃𝕆𝕍𝔼𝕊*

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