#Greg is insane for going along with that too actually. he didn’t even take him to a doctor 😭😭

[she-ra-her-ra]

Rose killing herself to experimentally create the first and only gem-human hybrid and leaving the upbringing to her homeless human boyfriend who knows almost nothing about gem history and her gem warriors who don’t understand human society or biology and never expected their immortal leader to die and they got what a year notice? A few years? an insane decision what the hell girl

[newtonsheffield]

First off it has to be said that I truly adore Bridgerton and Sons. I didn’t expect this AU to change my world, but I’m addicted. I’ve literally reread multiple works within the series an insane amount of times and then to come on here and find even more content??? My heart actually cannot deal.

You literally put so much love and effort into this world- the fact that you are really out here working hard during the day as well as writing chapters and then you provide us with even more content on here- you are a superhero and it’s so so soooo appreciated, and the love and adoration that you get is so well deserved.

One of my favourite elements of your AU is Gregory and Kate’s relationship, I think it’s just beautiful and I love it soooooo much! So it made me wonder, what’s the dynamic between Anthony and Lucy/ the dynamic when all four of them are together?

Thank you soooo much once again for everything that you do- B&S has such a special place in my heart and does brighten up my day in this dreary timeline that we’re in x

Hi!

Y’all are sending me the most heartfelt messages at the moment (always but particularly in the last few days!) and honestly, I’m just a little overwhelmed by everyone’s love for this series. I feel like I say all the time that when I started this series I never could have imagined that it would have turned into this. I was so excited when Insufferable got 100 reads and now it’s just about to top 5000!!!!!!! Which is truly... insane. And Honestly, at this point it’s much more down to all of you than it is me. I cannot express how it makes me feel that people have really taken this series on board truly just... I love and appreciate every single one of you and I hope you know that, I’m just too awkward to express it. I will just finish my little drone by saying that I have a stressfulish job and so I use writing his universe as a bit of harmless escapism. Some people do drugs, I do this. It is what it is 🤷🏻‍♀️ But ii’m very glad that it does the same for you!

Okay! Now! Anthony + Lucy! Let’s take a look!

Anthony Bridgerton first met Lucy Abernathy when she was hired as the receptionist at Bridgerton and Sons. She greeted him every morning and he returned it smiling politely but they never interacted beyond that. About a year into her employment Harold, his assistant, had come in and explained that they were scheduling appointments in a slightly different way so their may be a few kinks to work out in the coming days. Irritation flared in his chest when he said And who decided on this? Harold had brightly said Well Lucy thought that it would be- But Anthony was barely paying attention as he strode purposefully from the room, Lucy was very well liked and good at her job but what right did she have to decide how his appointments were scheduled?! Miss Abernathy who gave you the authority to-? He started, and Lucy, to her credit, looked barely ruffled at his sharp tone as she smiled and said Let me explain why this was a good idea. By the end of their little chat Anthony was feeling very embarrassed as he said Errr Lucy, I’m sorry about the way I spoke to you, it was uncalled for. We have a new associate starting in a few weeks, I think it’s about time for a promotion. Lucy’s answering smile was blinding.

Of course, after he’d promoted Lucy Abernathy to be Kate Sheffield’s assistant he deeply regretted it. Kate Sheffield may be an absolutely infuriating woman, but her schedule thanks to Lucy was flawless. Kate glided in and out of meetings Lucy behind her rattling off lists of questions handling things seamlessly. He may not like Kate, but he had to admit, she made one hell of a team with Lucy Abernathy. Their relationship was good, easy chemistry as Kate breezed into the office weekly with cake and sweets, and Lucy brought coffee and they giggled and laughed, and Anthony couldn’t help feel a little jealous. Of Lucy’s filing system of course, not the way Kate smiled at her. And so when Harold left Anthony saw his chance. He called Lucy into his office and said Lucy, how would you feel about leaving Kate’s service? Lucy looked positively stunned. Her mouth falling open a little as Anthony continued. I think you’re a bright girl with a bright future and we could work together. Lucy’s brow had furrowed slightly as she fixed him with a stern look. Mr Bridgerton, I’m awfully flattered, but I’m very happy working with Kate. And I hope this won’t affect our working relationship moving forward. And then, with nothing further she stood, and left his office and Anthony was left to marvel over this ridiculously competent young woman.

Lucy would be lying if she wasn’t a little nervous when she first started dating Gregory. Yes, she knew that she and Anthony got along in a professional environment, put appreciate someone’s work ethic was a far cry from wanting someone to be in a relationship with your youngest brother. Even when She caught Anthony smiling softly at Gregory and her huddled together in the break room at lunch a little caught in one another. She was still a little hesitant. And so when Gregory said, smiling his adorable little grin that wrinkled his eyes and made her heart flutter, I’m going to dinner at Kate and Anthony’s tonight. You should come! And Lucy had said a little hesitantly Greg I wasn’t invited I don’t- and Gregory had stood from his desk, threw his brother’s door open and said Can Lucy come tonight? And Anthony called out Loud enough for Lucy to hear I thought she already was! And Lucy had to bite back the smile. And their dinner’s became a weekly occurrence.

[lululawrence]

Wordplay 5.0 Reflections

I dunno what else to call it lmao it doesn't sound right to call this a meme, but whatever it is, here we are! lol @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed came up with these questions after @wordplayfics wrapped up last year and I love them so i'm gonna use them for this year as well.

I'm going to start out with listing the prompts and linking the fics i wrote for each one for everyone's reference, though I'll be linking them again through the answers as well. I'm also putting all the questions and answers beneath a read more because, as usual, I rambled lmao Alright! Here we go!

Struggle: I Said It Wrong, But I Meant It Right Reduce: I Love This Feeling (But I Hate This Part) Divide: He Carries The Key Rise: Thou, Sun, Art Half As Happy Sketch: I Heard You Talking

How did you come up with your ideas for the fics? Can you take us through your process after first receiving the prompt?

I don't know that I have a set way I come up with my fic ideas for Wordplay. It all depends on the prompt and what fic ideas I've got on my "to write list" that might fit that prompt. If nothing on my to write list fits or can be tweaked for a prompt, then I just go through my prompts tag until something strikes me for it, or I just ruminate on the different ways the word can be used and see if something comes up.

So, when I did the random word generator for the first prompt and "struggle" was the word that came up, I immediately thought of "struggle bus". lolllll and when I went looking through my to write list, I saw the girl Payneshaw fic I wanted to write and I was like omgggggg Nick ABSOLUTELY is riding the struggle bus the ENTIRE FUCKING TIME and I knew that was my fic for the week. lmaoooo and there you have it.

What is your favorite fic you wrote for Wordplay this year?

oooohhhh this one is HARD AND MEAN lmaoooo i forgot this was a question asked. okay legitimately i cannot choose a favorite because i'm actually stupidly proud and happy with all of the fics i wrote this year.

If you’ve participated in previous years of Wordplay, what has been your favorite prompt from all years you participated in?

WELP. as the creator of this challenge, i've participated in all 5 years which means there've been 25 prompts i've written. lolllll and honestly i think my favorite prompt is STILL from the first year. it was "bloodsucker". like, how great of a prompt is that???

What was the shortest fic you wrote this year? The longest?

the shortest one this year was... I Said It Wrong, But I Meant It Right at 4381 words.

the longest one was... I Heard You Talking at 10580 words.

What fic of yours surprised you?

i think all of them surprised me in some way. that's part of the joy of writing fics, isn't it? lollll but i think the one that surprised me the most was Thou, Sun, Art Half As Happy. it was a last minute change (i'll elaborate in the answer to the next question haha) and it was a VERY different direction than i had planned. it was all based off of a photo i saw on tumblr, and there was no prompt with the photo. i got to just take in the basic idea of the sticker being placed on a bridge overlooking the city and what might make that spot a good kissing spot.

now, as an ace who doesn't actually ENJOY kissing, i... didn't think about the fact that i would be writing a lot of it. lollll i actually have a super hard time writing kisses and trying to make them varied while also relaying the emotional intimacy of the moment, and then add on top of that the fact that once i started writing the fic, both harry and louis let me know pretty much as soon as words started getting written that they were both genderqueer and that worked differently for each of them, so harry would use they/them pronouns and louis would use he/him still, it just made things more interesting. and the way the fic developed??? like, i had a very vague idea of what would happen in the fic. so the way it actually came about all surprised me.

long answer short, from the very start, this fic surprised me and i was just along for the ride. it was a BLAST and i sure do love it, even if it does have the second lowest hits of all the fics i wrote this year haha

Were there any prompts you struggled to find an idea for?

STRUGGLED HAHAHA sorry. just funny since struggle was a prompt this year. ANYWAY. the prompt i had the hardest time with was defo rise. i've had this fic idea ever since greg james tweeted with shawn mendes months ago about how shawn basically forgot his interview with greg on the breakfast show, so greg had to last minute wing a LOT OF AIR TIME AND SHOW CONTENT and he did a great job, but it brought about some funny content... anyway. that made me wanna write a triad a/b/o fic where greg is louis and harry's beta. rise was going to be used in a lot of different ways through the fic, as well. because breakfast show requires greg to rise from bed early, he gets a rise out of harry and louis with his behavior and overt flirtations with shawn, they have to rise above their jealousy, etc etc etc. i was VERY EXCITED.

except i only had three days i was able to write every week this summer, and those were really really difficult to get. if i wanted to write on tuesday or thursday, i was often curling up with my laptop in a dark room with some caffeine and candles burning to soothe me after the insanity that is my life atm, and write for as long as i could before my brain stopped functioning, which was often only around 30 min. but see, that particularly week was the worst part of my son's 18 month sleep regression, which meant instead of him sleeping and letting me write, i was driving him around or trying to rock him back to sleep or letting him play in an attempt to tire him out etc etc etc and by friday morning i had to admit to myself there was no way i could write that a/b/o fic in my one guaranteed evening to write every week (saturday, btw). so i was suddenly left with around 36 hours to find a new fic idea and develop it enough to be able to write it in one evening.

as i said in the answer to the first question, i usually go to my prompts tag to see what might inspire me with this prompt word in mind, but for this one that wasn't the first place i went. i tried looking at more definitions even though i'd done that earlier and nothing was inspiring me. so i then spoke to several friends and was still having a hard time finding any ideas that felt like something i would enjoy writing and could do so quickly.

by saturday morning, knowing i had less than 12 hours to figure out what i was writing so i could actually WRITE IT in only like 2-3 hours of writing time, i finally sat down and scrolled through my prompts tag. once i did, i saw the photo for the "good kissing spot", and i immediately thought of sunrise. so i ran with it. but i wanted to make it stylinshaw, so how would i work that in, etc etc etc. it was just very fast and very difficult trying to figure out how i would structure it so it could be a fun meet cute kind of fic, but also work into them actually building a meaningful connection etc and... well. it was a lot. haha so yeah, it was just a hard time overall that week, but i'm super proud of it in the end.

Were there any prompts you had an idea for but ended up writing something different? If so, what made you choose to change what you wrote? Do you think you’ll ever write your original idea at a later date?

HA okay well i already answered most of this above, but for the last part of this question, yes i will absolutely write my original idea at a later date. the whole reason i decided not to do it wasn't because i couldn't turn it into a fic that could be written in that one writing session, but because i had hopes for what that fic would be, and i didn't want to shorten and condense it enough to do that. i didn't want to have to lessen the dreams i have for that fic in my head, so i decided i would just put it back on my to write list and save it for later. who knows when, but that fic will absolutely get written.

What do you think was the most difficult as well as the easiest part about the Wordplay Challenge?

most difficult was 100% finding the time to write. that was insanely hard for me all summer, but by the time wordplay was going, things at home had ramped up to being very overwhelming regarding the demands on me and my time, and what i had been doing to carve out some time for myself and writing wasn't working anymore, so i had to adjust even more with the understanding that i was working on a really strict timeline too. so yeah. just finding the time was absolutely the hardest part for me.

easiest part was the actual writing. these fics really flowed from me, outside of the pack fic, that one was actually pretty difficult to make sure i was getting the dynamics exactly the way i wanted to have them turn out, but even with that aspect, it still was like it flowed from me most of the time. these fics really just took over and i was along for the ride. it was a blast.

If you participate again next year, is there anything you’ll do differently? If so, what?

lmao well assuming people still want wordplay to happen again, i'll run it again and very likely will take part. so... with the difficulty i had in finding any time to do anything this summer, i was actually ridiculously stressed when it came to the writing part, but also the modding aspect of it. so i am not sure that i'll run it during the summer again next year. i might have it go during the early fall once school is back in session so i at least have only one child at home instead of three to battle lol so that's one thing i'll hopefully be doing differently.

as for the writing aspect, i don't think so actually. i've done 5 years of this, and i'm having fun with it. haha if i ever find a fic idea i think could work for it, i would consider doing a series for it next year, but it all depends on if there's something i'd like to write that could work for that kind of set up with this challenge.

if you made it this far, thank you for reading!!! xxx

[helloliriels]

Prompt #2: Allergies

February 2021 Johnlock prompt challenge, hosted by @ohlooktheresabee. Daily entry by 🐝 @helloliriels🐝 *** 🐝🐝🐝 Gonna have to cheat on this one, down sick, but since bees & allergies go together, here it is. Enjoy! 🐝🐝🐝 ***

Do Bees Kiss? or just Sting? 

Q: Do bees "kiss"?

             Why do bees "kiss"?  I went to Wikipedia.

A: When bees "kiss" they are actually passing nectar to other bees.

*******************************************

Sherlock kisses John.

It was early morning. And John was getting ready for work.

Sherlock bloody Holmes of course, pays no attention to people's privacy or morning routines, and can't be bothered to explain why he's standing in John's way as he makes his toast and goes about his business...  but there he is. Every place John needs to be. Waiting for something.

John is just about done and ready to head out the door - No thanks to Sherlock for making him late again - when he gets the shock of his life.

Sherlock kisses him.

A small peck on the lips. Almost chaste. Like those kisses you give to your crush in kindergarten. Or to your mum. When she insists.

John thinks it's an experiment. He knows it is. 

It must be. 

He gives Sherlock a 'you done now?' look, then goes around him when he gets no reply. 

Sherlock heads off to do his own morning routine. John sighs. Dropping the butter knife in the sink with a loud clank. Exasperated. He doesn't have time for this shit. 

Why do I bloody put up with it? 

He fumbles with his keys and jacket. Noting now that the genius has decided to get OUT of his GOD damn way of course, he is twice as late!!

He heads out the door in a rush. Slamming it, just a little in revenge on the way out.

***

Talking to Greg later that evening - around the corner from a crime scene where Sherlock is currently arguing with Anderson - he tells him about it off-hand. Confession of a sort. Get it off his mind. Greg will think it's damn funny.  "Pompous git, gave me a kiss earlier..."

"Wha???!!!....," Greg mouths a mock 'O' in awe as he turns to look at John, eyes wide in amazement...  a look that fully says, 'finally! It's going down!'

"I know right?" Playing it up, John laughs it off. Great joke. Were not a couple! He shrugs.

"What else happened?? What did he say?" Greg was dying to know now, taking his hands out and shaking John for more details. The man wanted details?! John could see this was the happiest moment of Papa Lestrade's life. It was almost a bummer to have to disappoint him...

         🐝   ***REST UNDER THE CUT***   🐝

"No, no, nothing like that." John reassured, "God I wish!" (It came out before he had time to stop himself). And Lestrade looked taken aback.

He added a little "Haha," like he had meant it as a joke after all.

He really didn't.

         Sobering thought.

Thinking better to explain himself, he added - "Hey, don't tell Sherlock I just said that?... by the way. Bit not good. It was just an experiment after all, I'm sure. You know how he is."

Greg was still just... flabbergasted. A balloon deflating. Open mouthed staring at John. No words.

John's half sad-smile said more than he probably intended. Shouldn't have mentioned it after all, he thought. "Well!" He added cheerfully, slapping Greg on the shoulder. "Was a fun case tonight. Sherlock will be happy. Solved it in under 5 minutes!" He prepared to leave, and shot off a parting, "See you round." With a half-smile. He bowed his head and walked off to follow Sherlock who was now leaving. John had his hands in his pockets now. Quite unlike him. Shuffling along. 

Greg watched as John kicked some debris in his path in frustration, mindlessly, as they left. He had never seen the man looking so downtrodden...  

At least, not after such a brilliantly resolved case! John was usually on cloud nine after watching the curly haired genius work. It was rather embarrassing really. The puppy eyes that looked up in worship at Sherlock as he dished out deductions, it was almost criminal. But lately he was getting more and more moody... Greg wondered.

And here, with this new evidence, Sherlock had managed to...   He stopped. Shaking his head. Unbelievable. Just unbelievable...

Greg took one last look over his shoulder at their retreating forms, before heading out himself. 

 "Unbelievable."

*** 

The week goes on.                       

Sherlock continues to kiss him, Randomly. Small pecks mostly. But sometimes a smooch. Nothing more. No explanations. Just kisses.

Experiment.

Must be. John kept telling himself.

Experiments require further data. It was the only possible explanation...

Sherlock had never shown any signs of wanting... relationship in his life. Mister 'girlfriends aren't his area' and 'married to his work', and... 'alone protects me'...  had never expressed any interest in any men either (that John knew of?). Hell, he'd even turned down some of the most bloody gorgeous ones they had met so far, both men and women. So John doubted that he was interested in that sort of thing. Some people just aren't.

The only really odd thing about it, is - Sherlock isn't saying anything to address the kisses.... 

It must be like having toes on the kitchen table, to him. John thought. A dummy hanging itself from their rafters. Or penicillin growing in the bread box. I'm just a thing. A dummy for this latest experiment.

At that last thought, a realization dawned on John. A horrifying, terrible realization. How had he not seen it sooner?!

Was Sherlock going to break out some rare dye, or some insane chemical powder he'd concocted - to dust and test John's lips for lip prints left at a crime scene next?? John could just see himself going to work with purple lips and a chemical burn that would take weeks to heal. Perhaps even suffering an allergic reaction...

All because Sherlock did not realize the exotic stuff would not COME OFF!!! and was actually quite dangerous.

He pinches the bridge of his nose at the thought. Exasperated. 

His brain hurts now. 

    This was happening a lot lately. 

The thought of what he was going to be subjected to next....the worry. Was almost worst. Well, it is worse - than the kisses, John thinks.

The kisses. 

Damn. Need to stop thinking about this.

John did his best to push it out of his mind. Not wishing to upset the equilibrium of their friendship. Crazy as it might be right now. At least this is one way, he was getting what he wanted? Or something like it. Gift horse and all. One doesn't ask...

He is tempted to ask however, about how you would go about setting up a mind palace? Just so he could keep the memories locked forever away in there to return to. But that would be more than telling.

So he just closes his eyes most of the time, when he knows it's going to happen; and stores it in the best way he knows how. Memorization. Skills learnt in public school. Repetition. 

Sherlock was certainly giving him that. 

John smiles despite himself. He gives it about a week before the worst will come out.

           He isn't wrong.

***

The height of ridiculousness comes one morning, almost exactly a week later. 

John is there in the kitchen, fork in hand - eating his breakfast, and reading the paper out of the corner of his eye. Completely non-plussed, while Sherlock continues to dive in for a small kiss. Between. Every. Single. Bite. The paper rattles a bit each time. 

John isn't even looking at him anymore.

Or acknowledging that this is happening.

At all.

He's got his back to the cabinets, facing out. And his slippered foot keeps tapping away.

Sherlock, as anyone watching would have seen - was acting as childishly as could be imagined. Not unlike when you see two kids who won't stop hitting one another, while say 'I'm not hitting you". If he hadn't been the recipient of it, John might have thought it was quite funny.

He wasn't sure how long this was going to go on. And clearly had decided to take the saint's role and be above it all; when Sherlock dives in for one more kiss. 

This time, he presses in deep, and opens his mouth a little. Holding it there. Breathing his air. 

  Waiting.

  Watching with a perplexed furrow of his brow,

                  for John's reaction.

Oh god. John thinks. Feeling the warm breath, and the warmer lips pressed up against his own.

What is now a very REAL, albeit awkward, kiss.

Sherlock does not have much experience in this area, after all.

John's breathing stops. He swallows hard. Tries to remember not to drop his fork.

His heart has just jumped out of his chest. And is now screaming at him. Pumping and pulsing like it's running a marathon. And his eyes scan around the room, as if someone might materialize from thin air, who could help, or at least explain all of THIS to him?!!!

     ...WHat the HeLL wAs GoiNg On??!!!

Lips still connected, breath shared, he looks up at Sherlock at last. Unable, really to avoid it at this point. He makes eye contact. 

His eyes full of fear, his eyebrows raised in question.

And showing... Honestly showing something else entirely, he hadn't meant to show at all.

Longing.

He looks like he is about to cry. He is about to cry. This. THIS. Is too much.

Sherlock can't have THIS from him. Not without a relationship. 

He pulls away. And turns his head, his lips out of reach. Closing his eyes. His signal, that he is DONE.

Done with this bloody experiment. Done with his stupid, unfeeling, selfish flatmate. Just done.

***

He feels, more than sees, Sherlock grin his way out of the kiss. Backing off just the slightest bit. But still not going away. 

When he looks back a few moments later, having calmed down his own breathing. And collected his feelings. Sherlock is still standing there. Looking down at him. A wicked grin on his face. At that look, John is stunned. Has this all been a JOKE to the man?!! 

He has only a moment to think before Sherlock's lips are on his again.

John drops everything this time. Throws, more like. Literally - newspaper, plate, fork, all of it - down. And pulls down on Sherlock's neck, forcibly dragging him closer. If Sherlock wants to kiss, then GOD DAMN IT, he is going to get fucking KISSED! And John releases everything that has been pent up inside of him, all week. All month. All of the years he has known and been in love, with Sherlock Holmes.

Sherlock was now holding onto him also, arms wrapping around his middle. Keeping him upright, somehow. While John was snogging him senseless.

That should teach him. John thinks as he pulls away. Completely out of breath and panting with the exertion he had just enforced. And glares up at his flatmate. Absolute daggers.

But Sherlock...  is now blushing, and looking pleased as punch. The response John sees, is also the kindest, and gentlest look in his eyes.

More love than he has ever dared to hope for from anyone, let alone, from his companion. More love than John thought the man standing before him, was capable of feeling. 

Contrary to everything Sherlock had tried to tell everyone, loudly, since the day John had met him. This was Sherlock being human. 

And it was all for him.

It was like a wall had come down. And the great genius' emotions were laid bare - exposed before John, for what they really were. Insecurity. Inexperience. He was offering himself up as a gift to be taken. A student to be taught. And John had... Oh.

Oh.

John blushes. He had just taught. Hadn't he?

Sherlock smiled. Glad to see John finally catching up. A puzzle at last, solved. 

A sweet little shrug of, forgive me? but this was the only way I know how... accompanied his smile. And John found himself laughing with relief at the expression. Giddy with it.

He pulled Sherlock back in to himself, gently this time. And gave him more of a sweet, first-date kiss.

With Sherlock's permission, it deepened it into a full, gorgeous, lovers kiss - His hand gripped tight in the expensive fabric of Sherlock's shirt, to keep him in place. Buttons be damned.

This kiss was;

Full of all the things John had wanted to say; 

Full of all the things Sherlock had been trying to say;

Full of all the things they had both held back for so long.

When it ended, John felt Sherlock lick a tiny bit of honey off of the corner of his mouth. Humming as he did so.

A little like a buzz.

🐝🍯🐝 Not unlike a bee.🐝🍯🐝

John shivered in anticipation. As Sherlock led the way...

If this was what loving Sherlock Holmes was going to be like... Watson smiled, then sign him up as beekeeper.

***************************************

posted on AO3 by helloliriels

More great fics and daily updates under the February 2021 Johnlock prompt challenge from ohlooktheresabee on AO3

[forevercloudnine]

new 52 scarebat ship meme

(I had @heroes-etc​ give me more questions, but for scarebat this time, since we talk about it 24/7 but I never post about it. These are from this ship meme.)

4. Their favorite physical feature on each other?

There’s only one feature of Bruce’s appearance that’s scarier when he’s not wearing the batsuit, and that’s his creepy blue eyes. Especially the way Greg Capullo draws them where they’re sickly pale and have ridiculously constricted pupils.

So his eyes would definitely be in the running for Jonathan’s favorite feature, even if seeing them would require Bruce’s mask to be off, which is something New 52 Scarecrow explicitly avoids. Yes, that character trait only exists to justify why Batman’s identity is still secret after Scarecrow mind controls and subsequently institutionalizes him in “Gothtopia,” but I think it’s interesting so I’m going to pretend it’s not shoe-horned in there for meta reasons.

Actually having to see Bruce without the cowl on would definitely permanently break the illusion of Batman as a nightmarish inhuman bat demon, which I’m sure is a large part of the appeal for anyone as obsessed with fear as Jonathan Crane. But Bruce’s creepy eyes would be a serious consolation prize. 

Bruce’s favorite of Jonathan’s physical features is rough, because Jonathan is famously not great re: physical features. I’m going to say his mouth, because a) that’s where the snark comes from, and b) the New 52 establishes that in one of their earlier encounters, Jonathan had sewn his own mouth shut, so it’s one of those things where a bad first impression turned positive later on leads to more fondness than if you’d made a good impression in the first place.

I just looked up the panel where he does it and I DID forget how incredibly gross his lips look here, which makes the fact that I have chosen it as Bruce’s feature seem really funny in retrospect. But I do think that seeing Jonathan’s mouth healed and unmutilated would be a reassuring reminder of how he’s stabilized since their first encounter, at least to the point that he isn’t hurting himself anymore. Also, Bruce buys him a lot of chapstick.

Bonus alternate answer that did not make it into the Google Doc:

9. How open are they with their feelings?

Bruce and Jonathan are both pretty competent deceivers in the New 52; Bruce always, Jonathan depending on how the writer is feeling (though you could argue that Bruce just has a stronger grip on reality, while Jonathan’s skill at obfuscation varies with how lucid he is).

...I was going to use Detective Comics #23.3 as an example of Jonathan being a good liar, but actually upon re-reading I’m realizing that only 1/4 rogues buy his attempt at manipulation. So maybe he’s considerably worse at hiding his intentions than he thinks he is. Regardless, he doesn’t ever attempt to disguise his obsession with Batman.

Whether or not he’d express romantic feelings or try to hide them is debatable. There’s no Masters of Fear equivalent in the New 52 establishing that he was ever mocked or punished for expressing romantic feelings for someone, though there is a flashback panel in his origin emphasizing that he was always lonely in this regard (and coincidentally doesn’t specify that his interest is in women, which is fun).

In Green Lanterns #17 he has some internal monologue about how fear is his romance and he needs Batman to feel it, but it is an INTERNAL monologue, so it’s not clear if this is something he would express to Bruce or keep to himself. Or if he’s even fully processed it himself, given how incredibly out of it he is in this comic. Most of his spoken lines are just kind of screaming incoherently. Bruce gets pretty snippy with a Green Lantern at the end of the issue for suggesting that Jonathan should be punished for his crimes as if he were in control of his actions. 

Bruce is a similarly complicated answer, since for all his deceptions and shadowy mystery he pretty much wears his heart on his sleeve when it comes to romance. It’s just that his heart doesn’t express or process emotions the same way as anyone around him, which can create conflict. His (seriously underrated) love interest during Scarecrow’s origin arc, Natalya, spent most of her time dating him thinking that he didn’t care about her for this reason. He was trying to express that he loved her, but he mostly did so through complimenting her skills, which she never took as serious declarations of affection because he wasn’t being straightforward and she was insecure.

Jonathan does not himself seem like someone who would be especially secure in the idea of another person having romantic feelings towards him, so I assume that while Bruce might THINK he’s being open with any romantic feelings he develops, he would in reality just be really confusing.

13. How do they react to being away from each other?

I actually think that in general, Jonathan is one of the few people who would have no issue dealing with Bruce’s tendency to unexpectedly go AWOL for long periods of time, given that he himself has a tendency to fixate on his work to the exclusion of everything else.

But New 52 Jonathan specifically probably has pretty serious abandonment issues due to his father putting him in “the pit” and dying before he could take him out, meaning that Jonathan was waiting for his dad to come back for him for God knows how long, until Jonathan Sr.’s employers finally sent the police to investigate. 

So while in general I think he wouldn’t be very clingy, any impression that Bruce had died or otherwise wasn’t coming back for him would probably be incredibly triggering. If Bruce could assuage this reaction by occasionally sending updates that at least indicated he was still alive, then I doubt Jonathan would have any problems with his absence.

(@heroes-etc​: bruce sending like a checkmark emoji once a day. jonathan hears his phone ping, looks at the screen, and goes hm. good. and doesnt respond.)

Bruce meanwhile has no problem ditching literally any love interest at any time if something crime-related comes up, unless he’s considering quitting the cowl for them (as Joker probably accurately fears will happen with Catwoman in Prelude to the Wedding). But I don’t think he’d stop being Batman for Scarecrow, nor would Jonathan ever want him to — he’s interested in Batman, not necessarily Bruce Wayne.

But even though Bruce wouldn’t have an emotional problem with distance, I think he would get similarly paranoid if they went too long without contact, though for different reasons than Jonathan. Unlike some other villains (*cough* Joker and Riddler), Scarecrow has machinations that don’t require getting Batman’s attention, so if he decided to continue with his less legal experiments, he would not feel compelled to get Bruce involved. While the “World’s Greatest Detective” would probably not have an issue keeping an eye on Jonathan while he’s in Gotham, he’s considerably less capable of that in space. And Jonathan is definitely a rogue he would be obsessed with keeping an eye on, even if he reformed. 

Batman & Robin Eternal established that Dick’s first supervillain conflict AND first mission leaving the country was chasing Scarecrow across the world for an entire summer, which is kind of insane considering how early it was in Batman’s career. Like, he did not have an army of children to watch Gotham for him while he was gone. He had one child, and he took that child WITH him. He left Gotham undefended for months, JUST to catch Scarecrow. Sooo that in of itself implies he wouldn’t be great at keeping his distance.

15. Does their view of themselves differ from their partner’s view?

Well, Jonathan occasionally sees Bruce as a giant bat demon, so yes.

Outside of that very obvious differing view, Jonathan in general sees himself and the rest of the rogue gallery as more vital to Batman’s identity than Bruce considers them; the extent to which he’s right varies depending on your interpretation of Bruce’s character, but it’s definitely not something Bruce would ever consciously think or say. 

This is related to something that’s definitely a misconception of his, though, which is that the majority of Batman’s job revolves around supervillains like him. In Kings of Fear, when Jonathan blackmails Bruce into letting him come on patrol with him (which is a whole thing in of itself), he’s shocked at how boring most of Batman’s work is. Which probably goes along hand in hand with sometimes seeing Bruce as an almost mythologically inhuman figure. 

In his defense, it’s not like he has a lot of context for what the minutiae of Batman’s job is like. He’s either fighting Batman, hiding from Batman, or imprisoned by Batman in Arkham, a place where everyone else also spends all their time fighting or hiding from Batman. Which would really skew your perspective.

Interestingly, Bruce and Jonathan are both people who pride themselves on being extremely self-aware. Both of them probably inaccurately. You can rant about how you have a perfect understanding of your troubled mental state all day long, but if you’re still dressing up like a monster at night to indulge the power fantasies you created as a traumatized child by scaring the hell out of people, there’s probably a level of self-realization you haven’t gotten to yet.

Bruce however is at least self-aware enough to regularly be able to analyze his way out of fear toxin induced hallucinations, which Jonathan is unable to do — when he’s not depicted as having become immune to his fear toxin due to overexposure (as he is in Green Lanterns #17), he can be defeated with the same formulas that Batman regularly manages to resist (like his honestly embarrassing breakdown in Nightwing #50). 

Which ties into the difference between how he sees himself and how Bruce sees him: Jonathan obviously visualizes himself as a “master” of fear. He actually has the same internal monologue about fear and trauma that Bruce does in Batman: The Dark Knight #13: “Make it your own... run to what you fear... stare it in the eye... until it whimpers and backs down.” But Bruce doesn’t see Scarecrow as conquering his fear; he sees him as addicted to it, to the point of his own detriment.

Which is interesting, because Jonathan clearly sees his Scarecrow persona as a way to regain control after being victimized by his father’s fear experiments throughout his childhood. I guess Bruce’s perspective would be that Jonathan’s father instead got him addicted to fear as a child, so his attempts at agency as Scarecrow are just a) reliving his trauma over and over and b) compulsively inflicting his own trauma on others. There’s probably some truth to that, even if overall it’s probably an oversimplification (and coincidentally pretty much EXACTLY what Riddler argues Bruce is doing by “funding” Batman in Batman Annual #4, so there’s that).

20. Did either person change at all, to be with their partner?

The obvious answer here is yes, because Jonathan is a supervillain with no regard for human life while Bruce is a superhero who has dedicated his life to protecting people. So presumably one or both of them would have to make serious compromises to be together. HOWEVER. Scarecrow’s primary motivation is to research, understand and inflict fear, while Batman’s modus operandi is making his enemies afraid of him. So despite their contradiction in morals, they’re uniquely positioned to advance each other’s goals, were they to ever join forces.

Bruce never has a problem using fear toxin on Scarecrow, presumably partially out of an “eye for an eye” sense of poetic justice, but also because Batman is practical and it’s a nonlethal weapon that’s always available to him while fighting Scarecrow. If he could have fear toxin customized for his own use, it’s hard to imagine him being unwilling to use it. In Gothtopia he actually advocates for using what’s leftover from Crane’s new formula on all the inmates at Arkham, which seems about as insanely morally ambiguous as it gets. Arguably, putting fear toxin in his smoke bombs would be considerably less wrong than drugging mental patients out of their mind when they’re supposed to be receiving therapy (this is also the issue where he illegally releases Poison Ivy because she did him a favor, which is both morally questionable and relevant to the current topic).

Jonathan obviously already thinks Batman is the most interesting possible case study in fear; it’s why he keeps coming back to Bruce and Gotham despite being one of the more independent villains in Batman’s rogue gallery in the New 52. So though he would have to give up actively kidnapping people (which would be a huge sacrifice, I’m sure), teaming up with Bruce would give him unrestricted access to his favorite test subject. Unfortunately, it seems very possible that he would fall back to old tricks if he ever felt that he’d gotten everything he could out of a partnership with Bruce. Fortunately, that would probably take a VERY long time.

[sir-skarsgard]

Dating Rodrick Heffley Would Include

* This NERD 

* He was so nervous to talk to you; you were so pretty and he was so anxious he literally felt like throwing up 

* His friends tried telling him you’d never talk to him, but he wouldn‘t give it up; from the moment he saw you in school he knew he wanted to talk to you

* He finally talked to you about a week after first seeing you; he nervously stumbled some fragments of sentences, left you both confused, and nearly threw up again when you laughed, before he realized it was a ‘you‘re kinda cute and funny‘ laugh not a ‘wow, what a fucking idiot‘ type of laugh 

* The two of you, shocking everyone, became friends; his mom loved you because you were a steady B student in every single subject besides math, where you got a C 

* Hanging out with him and watching the band practice, biting the inside of your lip and nodding along to his ‘we‘re good, right?‘ 

* After knowing each other for awhile the two of you actually became really good friends; there was no chance in hell you were going to college after school, and let’s be fair, neither was Rodrick 

* The two of you alternated sneaking into each other’s houses, like, every single night. He‘d come to yours, then you‘d go to his, and it‘d repeat and you‘d stay up basically all night every night of the summer, watching movies, eating snacks and cuddling on whoever’s bed 

* He’d always had a crush on you, but you never knew, and he never knew you had a crush on him as well 

* Like 2 and a half years after you met he finally got the nerve to tell you he liked you; he’d said the band was practicing and asked if you wanted to come over, knowing you rarely said no to band practice. And yet again you‘d said yes and came to the Heffley house that night, getting caught up in a 25 minute discussion with Mrs. Heffley about a book she was reading that you had just read in school and actually liked 

* By time you made it to the garage Rodrick was sweating buckets. He was wearing the usual jeans, whatever band-shirt he liked at the moment and a pair of converse that were seriously worn down 

* “Where is everyone else? I was only inside for 20 minutes“ you‘d laughed, then stopped when, even through the dim lighting of the garage, you saw how nervous Rodrick was “are you alright, Rodrick? You look like a ghost“ you‘d said, putting your hand to his sweaty forehead. 

* “I, uh... yeah“ he stumbled, gulping and looking down at you “well, there was actually something I wanted to tell you... I... uh... (y/n)I’vehadacrushonyousincewewere14″ 

* Despite him speaking so fast you’d heard every word. Your shoulders noticeably slumped and Rodrick cursed at himself. 

* “Oh, fuck-- shit, please just-- fuck, forget I said anything--” Rodrick stumbled, but he was quickly cut of by you placing a hand on his cheek and making him look at you 

* “Are you serious right now?“ You‘d asked. He nodded, looking at you with wide eyes. A smile graced your face as a soft laugh escaped your lips “you‘re dead ass serious?“ He nodded again “fuck, Rodrick, I’ve liked you since I first met you“ 

* Rodrick’s jaw dropped. 

* “Are you kidding me?“ He grinned “that‘s amazing-- I-I,” he couldn‘t help himself as he leaned in and pushed his lips against yours. You were shocked by his sudden movement and jumped slightly. He pulled away, his cheeks bright red “sorry“ he started, but you didn‘t let him finish 

* “No, no, no“ you‘d said, pushing yourself up on the balls of your feet and wrapping your arms around his neck to lower him as you attached your lips back to his. Rodrick couldn't have been more happy as he kissed you back, wrapping his arms around your waist and keeping you close 

* It was an unspoken thing after that night that the two of you were a thing, however if there was needed a spoken thing, Rodrick was quick to call you his girlfriend and there were no complaints from you 

* The two of you were already best friends who knew everything about each other and did everything together; you had already went to all his shows, despite not being the biggest fan of them, Rodrick was a really good drummer and you loved him 

* So much cuddling. He likes to spoon or have you lay on his shoulder on the bed, your legs all tangled up and his arm around you 

* Expect lots of kisses, especially in private, and always having his arm around you 

* Going to the Heffley house and having dinner, only pretending to leave and sneaking up to Rodrick’s room to cuddle and watch a movie 

* Babysitting Manny for Mr. and Mrs. Heffley so they can go out on date nights 

* When you’re around Rodrick mainly leaves Greg alone; so, by all means, come over as much as you want - Greg 

* You have gotten walked in one in a pretty heated make out session before with his hand dangerously close to your boobs underneath your shirt, getting a lecture from his mom or an awkward conversation from his father about whatever he was told to go tell the two of you, or a disgusted noise from Greg and possibly a shriek from Rowley if he was with him

* His friends like you because you don’t make Rodrick ditch them to go to coupley stuff, you actually like hanging out with all of them and you can take a lot of sarcastic comments and fire them right back 

* Wrestling on the sofa for no reason 

* Helping Greg with his homework if Rodrick was like in the shower or something for once, and explaining some things in your best subjects and just scratching your head in the math section 

* “Guess what!” “Did you finally shower?“ “I shower“ “No, you do not“ “I do! smell, I showered yesterday“ “Ew, Rodrick, stop“ lot‘s of laughing and teasing throughout conversations like this 

* There’s never a dull moment with Rodrick 

* Cuddling and falling asleep on him on the sofa after just talking and watching movies after school or over the summer, your finger tracing little patters on whatever body part your hand laid on his body

* Rodrick wouldn’t move while you slept, and often times fell asleep as well 

* You weren’t as heavy a sleeper as Rodrick had been, so when Greg came home and started yelling, you woke up, but when Rodrick didn’t, not shocking you; most the time you just decided to shush Greg and fall back asleep 

* Watching scary movies together and laughing at the characters stupidity 

* He still gets flustered around you sometimes when you do certain things he’s always loved 

* If you’re ever insecure about anything he will absolutely compliment you on that thing or if it’s a hobby he‘ll ask to see what you do and he‘ll compliment whatever it is and truthfully tell you he thinks you're great at it

* He can be insecure sometimes, too, so just compliment him and cuddle him and do what he does for you 

* You better believe he will watch an insanely long string of movies with you over the weekend, hanging out in his bedroom and snuggling on his bed with the laptop playing whatever movie you were both o and either ending up with a pillow fight or a make out session 

* Loving each other so much, and being perfect for one another, and Mr. and Mrs. Heffley adore you so it’s all good 

[ryanmarshallryan]

Pride & Predestination

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of no fortune whatsoever, must be in want of a sugar daddy.

However, Henry did not fit this sentiment. In fact, he could care less about money or men, he really just wanted a large steak and cheese sandwich.

He lived just across the street from a sandwich shop. He heard a noise near the window and looked out, noticed the sandwich shop and glared at it, slouched lazily on the couch.

He looked more closely and could see a worker inside taking a footlong sandwich out of a toaster oven. He stared at it longingly and imagined it sliding down his throat into his stomach.

Then it was gone. He saw as the worker looked at the floor and back in the oven in a perplexed look. Henry felt a soft jolt from his stomach as though something had been suddenly deposited into it. 

Henry made himself to believe that the worker must have dropped the sandwich, and that Henry must have simply gone past the point of hunger that his stomach gave up trying to tell him to get up and eat something. He dosed off, letting his laziness get the best of him.

Henry had no desire whatsoever to go to work that evening for his closing shift as a waiter. All of the customers were snobby and entitled, and nearly every shift Henry had a dozen complaints that the Mac and cheese was too cheesy, or that the cheeseburger was too well done.

“The cooks are legally bound to cook ever burger well done for liability. It says so in the menu” he told a dozen unhappy customers. While taking back some food that customers flat out refused to eat, Henry looked longingly at it. People were so picky about food, but if it were Henry, he would eat everything in that restaurant. First of all, he tended to eat free leftover food anyways if there was ever a mistake, but he was starving as he didn’t have time to take a break before a rush. He imagined the contents of one particular plate being in his stomach as he emptied them into a garbage bin.

He was surprised that there was no sound of a thud onto the other trash. There was however a behind a point just higher than his navel that felt a bit expanded.

He brushed off the occurrence, assuming he was simply exhausted from working so much, got a cool drink of water, and continued working.

By the end of Henry’s shift he was absolutely exhausted. With the restaurant cleaned and closed, Henry returned home, kicked off his shoes, ripped off his sweat and greased stain shirt, grabbed a tub of ice cream and started spooning large amounts into his stomach. He wished his growling stomach would shut up. He wished that all the food in the house was in his stomach right now and that he wouldn’t have to waste any energy eating. He stared at the ice cream and imagined it was already in his stomach. 

It disappeared. And he felt a shiver rise up from his gut as a quick rush of cold cramped his stomach. Quite confused, and thinking he was going insane, Henry took a quick shower and went straight to bed. 

The next morning was finally his day off. His buddy, Greg, would be coming over to make breakfast with Henry. Henry must have forgotten to set an alarm, because he woke abruptly to Greg rapping on the door.

“You look dreadful” Greg told Henry as he opened the door.

“Slept in. Had the closing shift.”

“Were you the customer?” Greg asked, poking Henry’s bloated stomach.

Henry glanced down at his stomach which seemed to be protruding forward an inch or two more than usual.

Greg had brought fresh eggs and they made French toast with them, and covered them in syrup and bananas. It was much easier to be motivated to make food when Henry had a friend to share it with.

“Are you gaining?” Greg asked suddenly, “Bulking up for something?”

“No, just... bloated. Honestly I didn’t actually eat much yesterday.”

Greg took his plate and began cleaning it. Henry went to help clean too, but Greg stopped him, “You said you had a long shift. Let me clean the dishes for once.”

Gratefully, Henry sat and stared out the window across the street to the sandwich shop. There was a man in a hot dog suit holding a sign promoting some sort of sale of the day. The man looked positively bored standing in the hot sun, not too unlike Henry felt at his job.

“Fancy watching a movie?” Greg asked, pulling Henry back to reality, “You okay, mate? You seem a bit dazed today.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m all right just a bit distracted.”

“I know you’re too poor for therapy but if you need to talk to someone-”

“It’s not like that. Just had an off day yesterday.”

“Sudden weight gain is a symptom of depression you ought to-”

“I’m fine!” shouted Henry, a little louder than he had planned.

Greg still seemed a bit concerned, but dropped the subject. Greg convinced Henry to come out for a walk. Henry knew Greg was trying to get him to get out a bit to change his mood, and Henry didn’t really mind.

They wandered around the neighborhood a bit, passing a cluster of shops nearby. They were almost back to Henry’s house when they say the man in the hot dog suit, who called out to them.

“Special offer this week. Buy two sandwiches, get a hot dog free!” the man said in a monotone voice to them.

“What’s so exciting about a hot dog?”

“Couldn’t tell you” the man replied cooly.

“Do you like working at this shop? I might be looking to pick up another job to get a little extra cash.” Henry asked.

The hot dog man, dropped his voice low so only Henry and Greg could hear, “Let me put it this way. I honestly wish I were a hot dog, so someone would just swallow me whole and put me out of my misery here.”

Henry gave a little chuckle, while Greg responded “That bad?”

Henry attempted to make a joke “Well if I go order two sandwiches, reckon they’ll let me take you as my hot dog?”

The hot dog man glanced down on Henry and smiled back “I think I’d enjoy that.”

Henry gazed at the hot dog man and wondered what it might be like if that large hot dog suit was in his stomach. 

Suddenly Henry’s stomach was cramping uncontrollably. Greg assuming Henry was about to be sick, led him away back to Henry’s house. From the time it took them to cross the street, Henry’s stomach had expanded to three times it’s usual size. 

“What the hell?” Greg exclaimed as he pulled Henry into the house. There was a thumping sound and Henry’s stomach ballooned to the size of a small person, causing Henry to trip over his feet, and Greg to fall on top of him.

Henry shocked, yelled at Greg to look out the window and see if the hot dog man was still outside.

“No, but his sign is in the street. Maybe he went inside to get something.” “Oh he went inside all right,” Henry gestured to his enlarged stomach, which was now shifting in odd movements as if there was something large and alive inside it.”

Greg glared at it, then knelt down by Henry and put his ear to Greg’s gut.

“It’s quite muffled but he seems a bit confused. Swallow some ir for him, why don’t you.”

Henry tried swallowing some air, but stared at Greg dumbfounded, “I must be dreaming.”

“You must be dreaming? I think I’m the one dreaming.”

“What do we do now?” Henry asked as he felt a painful kick into his ribs from the inside of his stomach.

“Make you vomit, I guess?”

“But I never swallowed him, there’s no way he would fit in my throat.”

“What do you mean, of course you swallowed him.”

“I thought I was hallucinating yesterday but you seem to see it too.” Henry then recounted how he kept imagining eating things and how they seemed to disappear. Greg started rummaging through Henry’s cupboards and bringing out various snack items and had Henry imagine eating them. One by one, they disappeared. 

At one point they heard a very muffled “I love Goldfish!” from inside Henry’s gut. 

“Imagine eating a watermelon!” Greg suggested excitedly.

“It doesn’t work like that. I need to see it to eat it.”

Greg set off to the grocery store to buy as many random things as possible.

Henry sat idly on his couch staring at the mass of flesh before him. Occasionally he would hear a muffled “More air!” or “More goldfish!” He was surprised at how calm the hot dog man seemed to be in his stomach.

Greg returned half an hour later with a large assortment of fruits, snacks, meats and desserts. On they went for a good portion of an hour of Henry seeing how much could magic into his stomach with his mind. The hot dog man started shouting at them now “It’s getting a bit crowded in here, can you stop?”

“Can you imagine them getting out of your stomach? Maybe let out the hot dog man?”

Henry tried with all his might but nothing happened. “Well I need to see it to eat it, so maybe I need to see it to regurgitate it?”

“Well that’s unfortunate. You can’t very well see into your own stomach,” Greg said, thinking hard. He took a photo of the next food item with him phone and after Henry had eaten the item, he attempted to regurgitate it concentrating hard on the picture. Nothing happened.

“You should get out of my range of vision.” Henry told Greg abruptly.

“Why?”

“Well obviously I didn’t mean to eat the hot dog man, so I might accidentally eat you if we’re not careful!”

“Is that a bad thing?”

Henry glared at Greg in surprise, then closed his eyes tightly. 

“Henry, I’m fine really.”

“Why aren’t you scared of me?”

“Well, I, uh... I’m your best friend.”

Henry was not convinced by this reason but again decided to go along with it.

The next day, Greg drove them to restaurant after restaurant, doing as many food challenges as were available. Challenges and deals like “Eat this 10 patty burger in 10 minutes and you’ll get it free.” Everyone was quite stunned because he seemed to eat so quickly, they did not even see him do it.

They had not heard the hot dog man call out anything in over a day, so they assumed he must have been digested. Henry’s gut was no longer just a very tight bulging mass, but a doughy ball of fat. Greg seemed to really enjoy this. He rubbed and played with it. Henry was amused but also a bit confused, as he had never seen Greg act like this.

After another couple days of calling in sick to work, Henry went with Greg to a pie eating contest at a nearby fair. Henry was honestly a bit sick of eating so much, and was quite concerned about the enormous state of his stomach, but Greg seemed very excited.

Henry ate a few pies rather quickly, but paused for a moment looking among the cheering onlookers. He locked eyes with Greg. Why was Greg so focused on having Henry eat absolutely everything? Henry stopped eating and withdrew from the competition.

“What’s wrong? You had two pies on everybody else,” Greg asked in a concerned tone.

“I’m confused on why you want me to keep eating. This is bound to be bad for my health. Don’t you care about that?”

“Well... It may not be super healthy but it sure looks great.” Henry looked at Greg in a mix of confusion and disdain. “I’m not a pig to be fattened up and look nice, I’m a normal guy.”

“I’m sorry I let it go this far. I just... I’m kind of obsessed with you and you're stomach. Have been for a while. Been fantasizing about being in your gut for quite some time.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Henry asked, taken aback, “You want me to eat you.” “Only if you want to,” Greg said, eyeing Henry’s bulging stomach.

“But I’d digest you! And you’d die!”

“You didn’t think much about the hot dog man.”

“Well he enjoyed it.” “I would too so what’s the difference?” “You’re my friend.”

“If it makes you feel any better, once you’ve digested me, the curse will be broken.”

“The curse?”

“Well every time you eat me, time resets back to when you started being able to eat anything.” “I’ve - I’ve eaten you before?” Henry asked, utterly shocked.

“137 times so far,” replied Greg, then noticing the concern in Henry’s face, he continued “but I’ve been enjoying it! Sure, I’ve gotten to a point I’m trying to stop the cycle and allow time to keep moving, but I can’t lie and say I don’t enjoy getting eaten by you. I guess I am just predestined to be your stomach fat.”

“No! This can’t be. That means I’m stuck too. Maybe the only way to keep time moving forward is to not eat you!”

“That’s what you usually say. Your pride always gets the best of you. C’mon, just eat me for once. I much prefer you choosing to eat me rather than me climbing down your throat forcefully.”

“Well if you know what you’re doing,” said Henry, imaging eating Greg whole. His stomach extended slightly. It did not need to grow too much larger to accommodate Greg however, since it was already quite large. Greg disappeared from the spot he was standing and Henry felt a definite sudden weight gain in his midsection. For. while Henry just sat there as his insides were massaged by Greg’s steady hands.

There was a thump and Henry was back on his couch staring at the sandwich shop, his stomach much flatter than it had been in a while.

“Greg?” he asked the air.

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of no fortune whatsoever, must be in want of a sugar daddy. However, you don’t fit this sentiment, do you? Maybe you’d like to eat some sugar, daddy?” said Greg, climbing into the window.

“Did the cycle break?” Henry asked, hopefully.

“Nope, but you seem to remember attempt 138. But I’ve lost count at this point.  So this time I think we are going to try a new tactic. I’ve got a rocket ready for you. How does the entire Earth and all it’s inhabitants sound like for a nice breakfast?” asked Greg.

“Greg, what the f-”

[grimelords]

I have been unbelievably busy for all of 2020 so far. Starting a new job and crunching to finish an old one, it's been very good but it has also meant that I haven't had the downtime I'd have liked in order to write long screeds about when drums sound good in songs so my December and January playlists unfortunately never got finished. They will exist as 'lost' playlists in the grimelords canon where you will simply have to listen to them and have your own thoughts about the songs instead of having your judgement clouded by me saying things like 'this sounds nice' and 'I love when the guitar goes woo-eee'.

You can listen to them here:

December https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4crPEVSPwftPpWl14xUrXF

January https://open.spotify.com/playlist/25MP7onYLCwWRYBIi0u3yc

As far as this, my February playlist goes: It's great! It's two and a half hours. The songs sounds nice and the guitars go woo-eee. I was worried I wouldn't be able to listen to as much music with my new job but it turns out I'm listening to more than ever which is extremely nice. Please enjoy, and if you'd like to subscribe to this playlist please do so here: https://tinyletter.com/grimelords

Listen to this playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3ZraEZOeS6qvVxfnz3AJS9

Ballad Of The Skeletons - Allen Ginsberg, Paul McCartney, Phillip Glass and Lenny Kaye: I had a dim childhood memory of this 1996 Hottest 100 funny skeleton song that my sister randomly brought up this month and was was shocked to find out that somewhere deep in my brain the part where the electric chair skeleton says “hey what’s cooking???” was still stored. I was also shocked to find out that the funny skeleton song I remembered from when I was a kid was actually a collaboration between Allen Ginsberg, Paul McCartney and Phillip Glass and was an unexpected hit on MTV and Triple J in 1996 for an as yet unknown reason.

I Can Go With You - Sam Burton: This song came up in my Discover Weekly, and I was so excited to listen to more of this 70s singer songwriter I've never heard of before who has no doubt had a long and illustrious career and was shocked to find out that not only is this song from 2020, it is also the first and so far only release by Sam Burton and his debut album is coming out sometime this year. I love how plain it is, and the first time I heard it it made no impression on me until a couple of hours later when I realised I was humming the melody to myself. It has this decepitive simplicity to it, and it sounds like a song you've always known which is really about as good a compliment as you can give a song. I also love this statement from him: “I was writing a song a day for 30 days as a personal challenge to myself. I Can Go With You came near of that practice and I considered it a throwaway at the time. After recording most of the album I still needed a couple more songs and decided to throw it on and we recorded it live followed by two others. When I listened back it ended up being one of the tracks I was happiest with on the record.” I love when artists are asked about songs and they have no divine inspiration to relate, just a process of daily work where they're like "well, I wrote it, like I always do. Did the chords and the words and everthing just like normal. I write hundreds of these things and this one came out pretty good. I don't know what else to tell you."

Wild Dogs - Colter Wall: This is a song by Billy Don Burns who you can probably expect to see on this playlist next month, and who as I understand it is one of these 'real' country guys that have been around for a million years and only ever had success when other people sang their songs. So it's very nice of Colter Wall to continue that tradition for him. I love the way this song takes the metaphor to a place of almost uncomfortable literalism, a tryst metamophising into something private, bloody and feral. The subtle way the lap steel whines slowly along in the background before stepping out and taking centre stage once the song picks up steam near the end is a marvel too.

Tom's Diner - Suzanne Vega: I had a live version of this randomly recommended to me by youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkYPge6ZKSQ and it made me see this song that I'd always been sort of aware of in a new light and really properly appreciate it for the first time. Somehow I'd never noticed the last verse where it moves from literalism to memories, and of course that's sort of the moment that ties the whole song together. What I really appreciate about the acapella arrangement is that it feels like this is a song that's existed a million times before but she's the first person to actually write it down and record it. Everyone's made up a little dishwashing song or a little walking song, reciting some to-do list in your head. It's an entire genre that exists under people's breath for a few minutes and gets immediately forgotten.

If You Don't Know Now, You Never Will - Drugdealer: I could have sworn this was a Tobias Jesso Jr song. I really just assumed it was until I looked at the credits. It's such a nice song though and I'm glad this sort of 70s californian vibe is making a quiet comeback because it is just uniformly pleasant and it's nice to hear these sorts of arrangements, with the accenting violin runs and things like that. All the extra decorations and ornamentations that have sort of disappeared.

Crimson Tide - Destroyer: I absolutely love this new Destroyer album because it just feels like such pure uncut Destroyer. I’ve always thought of him as a sort of 400 year old vampire lounge singer who is just amusing himself at this point and so the cover art has really confirmed my suspicions on that front. The lyrics through this whole album are so good, the sort of stream of consciousness strangeness like ‘when lightning strikes twice the funeral goes completely insane’ that takes a on such gravity because he sings it with complete deadpan seriousness.

Truth (feat Alicia Keys and The Last Artful, Dodger) - Mark Ronson: I didn't really give this album a chance when it came out but ever since I found out Alicia Keys is good now (Time Machine) I've been looking for more good Alica Keys work and found one here. The Last Artful, Dodger is one of the worst artist names I think I've ever heard but she absolutely kills it on the way she says biiiiitch so I'll forgive it.

Surf & Turf - Boldy James + The Alchemist: Alchemist's production on this whole album is so incredible. He really just lets Boldy go and doesn't get in his way like good production should. Especially on the opening verse where Boldy James sticks with that loping flow for so long in 3s over 4 that matches that arpeggios in the beat, it's just a perfect harmony of rapper and producer.

Fat Mac - Duke Deuce: Misogyny in rap is a real issue that nobody seems really allowed to talk about because it's obviously very complicated, and this song some real classic 'stay in the kitchen' type woman hating in it and is basically incredibly callous and cruel throughout. However this beat is hot and there is also a part about a third of the way through where he says "fuck her till that pussy fart" and then makes a big fart noise, so.

Set It Up (feat. Trina) - Kamaiyah: I only found out about Kamaiyah's fantastic 2016 album A Good Night In The Ghetto about two weeks before her new one came out so I've been on a real Kamaiyah hype for a little while now. She's just fantastic. I love this song because I love the part where Trina seemingly out of the blue threatens to piss in my mouth. The first time I heard it I said 'wow!' out loud.

Come As You Are - Greg Phillinganes: There's something going on with the pop math in this song that I just can't put my finger on. It feels for all intents and purposes like this should be a hit. The melody is great. The big synth voice is great, it's got extremely fatty bass. It's great! But something about the structure of it is just off, it's got too many sections or something. Which kind of makes me love it more really.  

Devotion - Pure Bathing Culture: What surprised me the most about this song is the secret shredding happening throughout. It feels like a sort of clean and cool guitar that hasn’t existed in the wild since the Lethal Weapon soundtrack and it adds such an energy to this already completely wonderful song.

Paper Cup - Real Estate + Sylvan Esso: The production on this song is just so beautiful. The violin melody and the pillow soft synths really add such an extra dimension to it. The tone on everything really. The guitar in the solo. Every time I listen to this song I just want to listen to it again because it goes down so smooth.

Mark Zuckerberg - Nap Eyes: I’m a very big fan of the way this song transitions from a sort of TMBG novelty song halfway through into a lonely and beautiful thing instead. It’s like he got distracted and wandered off in the middle of his set but the camera followed him. I also haven’t heard a lyric in a long time that made me bark laugh so instantly as “And what does he do with all that sand? He collects sand right? I think I read that somewhere. Seems innocent enough.”

Viking Hair - Dry Cleaning: I fell in love with this band immediately on hearing this song. The way the spoken lyrics sit in a place of almost coherence, dipping between mysterious phrases and earnest admissions feels like Life Without Buildings for a new generation. I love the feeling of a huge crush at the centre of this song that comes through achingy in every single word, even when she's talking about abandoned refrigerators.

LeBron James - Do Nothing: This is my number one song this month I think. I've listened to it every single day and I cannot wait to see what this band does once they've got more than a couple of songs out. It's my absolute favourite kind of lyrics: the kind that sounds like you just wrote down every one-sided phone conversation you overheard on the bus and then the music is some halfway point between Black Midi and Franz Ferdinand. What else do you need!

Can I Receive The Contact? - The Spirit Of The Beehive: The Spirit Of The Beehive's album is one of the best I heard this month. The way the production incorporates sound collage and samples without diluting the immediacy of the songwriting is really something special that feels hard to pull off in a rock context but sounds effortless through this whole album. The way this shifts at the end into the odd time section is so great and really the way the whole album flows like one long track is just amazing. Please listen, I'm obsessed.

An Air Conditioned Man - Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever: There is so much space in Rolling Blackouts songs. They just go and go, sitting in this great jam space without feeling shaggy. The tempo across the album stays pretty consistently at this breezy, upbeat, driving speed that makes it feel like as soon as one song ends the next one just picks up exactly where it left off. It almost feels like a studio confines them and they'd be better off just recording their album live at a show where every song can go for 8 minutes like it wants to.

Leak -Truth, yesnoyesnoyes- - Boris: I got to see Boris and Merzbow this month, which was a great treat for me but it was also at a seated theatre venue which was a very strange choice. Sitting down and clapping politely as Merzbow pressed the screaming button feels odd, like being at an 1800s World's Fair show about the wonders of electricity or quite literally like being the guy in the chair getting blown away by the speakers in the Maxell ads. I bought earplugs for the show but ended up pulling them out for the last three songs or so to properly experience it, and it was fucking great. Something I was thinking about after the show is that it's interesting how Boris mostly have clean vocals, and really approach metal as an idea from and angle that's more shoegaze than Slayer. Aside from the immense volume, there isn't a lot about their music that I would describe as agressive, even most of what Merzbow added to the set was just extra feedback frequency noise, not atonal agression. I don't mean this in a trve kvlt way, more like it's interesting how they've taken the aesthetics of metal and refined them into pure amplifer worship, in their words, by either playing straight drone, or just playing normal hard rock at inhuman volumes. Boris are very good is what I'm saying, and I can't wait to listen to more of their extremely large discography.

Nameless Streets - Defeater: I've never really listened to much hardcore and I'm not really sure why. I've listened to Defeater's first two albums to death though so maybe it's time to branch out. What I love about this song, and this band in general is the vocal delivery. In a lot of agressive music from metal to screamo, because the agression and emotion is always sitting at a 10 the nuance can get lost and it becomes a sort of white noise, but Defeater have a nice way of backing off musically and vocally here and there to let the hard hits really hit hard. The outro to this song is also some absolutely world class snare work, building a tension bed in the simplest way thats relieved when the rest of the band comes crashing back in.

Boys In Town - Divinyls: I love the true desperation in this song. The trapped in a small town, surrounded by fuckers stress that gives way in the second half to just screaming "get me out of here!!". I am also interested in the evolution of the phrase 'too much, too young' and would like to know whether this song is referencing the song by The Specials, and if the Defeater song on this playlist is referencing this song or The Specials song, or if all three came up with it independently. It's a simply enough phrase, I suppose they could have. Who cares, really.

Body By Crystal - Spike Fuck: Come on a journey with me and imagine a world where Alex Cameron makes good music. That's Spike Fuck! The sort of burned out, past their prime singer desperate for a hit in any sense type of character - except actually put together with some heart and emotion and not an 80s comic book writer's understanding of human lows. I cannot wait to hear more from Spike Fuck.

Rogue Wave - Aesop Rock: It is something of a marvel how consistently high quality Aesop Rock's work is. For all his verbosity and expansive vocabulary he seems to never veer into white guy rap god flexing for the sake of it. Even a song like this that's 3 minutes of dense verses with nothing resembling a hook doesnt feel exhausting, it just feels like a series of extremely pleasing words and images like "take it where the warlocks lock horns, soda pop, popcorn / top notch gore set to Bach over fog horns" that makes my brain go "nice".

Momentary Bliss (feat. Slowthai and Slaves) - Gorillaz: I love the strange rollout Gorillaz are doing for this album, building the tracklist one song at a time. It's a nice way to force close listening, especially in songs with odd structures like this. I love hearing how different prouction changes Slowthai's approach; on this and Deal Wiv It that he did with Mura Masa it feels a lot brighter than anything on Nothing Great About Britain and there's a playfulness in his flow that comes through accordingly. Gorillaz are always moving around musically but I love how much of a live band feel this has compared to the more studioy sound that killed their last album for me.

We Will Always Love You (feat. Blood Orange) - The Avalanches: I am so excited at the possibility of a new Avalanches album already, and this is the perfect song to have as a lead single because it functions more like a teaser. Like 'would you like an hour more of this kind of beautiful, loving dream?'

Tar Sequence - Lalo Schifrin: I found out a little while ago that the local news theme when I was growing up was actually this song from the score to Cool Hand Luke, and according to a bunch of other guys in the youtube comments it was the local news theme for a lot of stations across America as well. The scene is of a prison road gang working under the blazing sun, and I'm sure someone could write a thinkpiece about the soundtrack to the nightly news, and really the platonic ideal of news themes in general stemming from the score to a scene about prison labour. But not me! I'm just going to write this little post and say we all owe Lalo Schifrin our lives for inventing the sonic pallette of kung fu AND the news, which is an incredible achievement whichever way you slice it.

When You - Tha Pope: It's a little bit of a shame that footwork is 'over' now but I suppose that's the way of things. The intro to this song is an absolute all timer for me. The delay soaked tag, the extended organ lick and then a total gear shift into this shrieking vocal sample that sounds like something has gone wrong but is revealed in actuality to be the centre of the whole track. I absolutely love Pope's little adlib at the start, and halfway through when he brings it back - it injects some real humanity into this cacophonous, volatile song and lets you know someone's done this on purpose, they've not just turned every dial to 10 and pressed play.  

Jonny/Jonny (Reprise) - Faye Webster: I am absolutely in love with the tone of Faye Webster's voice and especially the way she slowly slides up to the note at the end of every line in the verse. This is a song that belongs to the great genre of songs that sound like they were entirely written and performed while laying on the floor and staring at the ceiling. The reprise here comes back at the end of the album and I love it so much. It feels like a Sex And The City monologue set to music, an underexplored genre I'd definitely like to hear more of.

Holes - Matt Berninger: Matt Berninger of The National covered Mercury Rev's Holes for a series of charity 7"s that Planned Parenthood are doingand I really love his take on it. It's a difficult song to cover because it is so beloved, and I think he does really well to not smooth out the arrangement into any sort of easy listening version. The rumbling piano and the extra vocals that mirror the original saw sound near the end are just wonderful. The part that always breaks my heart in this song is the "bands" line at the end and he really does it perfectly without being overdramatic.

Ta Aro - Nadia Reid: I love the way this song is just soaked in tension and potential energy. She has a beautiful way of holding a note just past the edge of her breath, like when she sings 'glory hallelujah' or 'I am stronger' and in the wordless refrain that just draws me in. Then the way it all closes in on itself and shadows close in at the end while it swells to this beautiful thunderstorm of sound. Just great.

Purify - Neurosis: Someone had a tweet a while ago that was like 'listen to a new album every day in February and write about it' and I thought 'fuck it why not' and started doing that. I kept a little note in my phone of every album I listened to that I'd never heard before, and I ranked them out of 5 so I could remember which ones I liked. I ended up listening to 49 new albums which surprised me, and it was surprisingly easy to do as well so I've decided to keep doing it in March as well. Highly recommended. A nice side effect of constantly searching for new things to listen to is it's given me a chance to hear bands that I've always heard about and know the name of but never actually listened to for one reason or another, which is how I got to Neurosis. It's nice to hear this kind of industrial 90s metal that I'd only ever previously heard in Tool from another angle, and it is especially nice to hear bagpipes in a drone metal context - a thought I'd had independently about a week before hearing this album and was glad to have willed into existence before me.

Shallow Sun - Real Estate: Time! I love a song about aging that mentions specific years and ages so you can count along on your fingers. '25 in 2010... so he was 24 when they put out in their first album.. 39 in 24.. so he's... 35 now.. and i'm 28... which means I'm... 3 albums behind..'

Quand Vas Tu Retrer - Melody's Echo Chamber: I'll listen to any song in 5/4. It is simply groovy. This song is so beautifully textured it feels like you can just get completely lost in the sound while the groove moves it along.

Living Through Another Cuba - XTC: I think I've posted this song on one of these playlists before but fuck it, the more time passes the more I think this might be one of the best songs ever written and a complete and total encapsulation of the cold war mood. The absolute maniac resigned powerlessnes on full display, screaming and shouting about pullings fins from an atom bomb and the absolute certainty that even if the world isn't destroyed this time it'll all come around again soon enough anyway.

Time - U.S. Girls: I am a huge proponent of the long song at the end of the record as a concept, and really I believe every song should be the long song at the end of the record if at all possible. This amount of colour in this jam is just incedible, it never gets weighed down or waylaid it just keeps moving though an ever shifting kaleidoscope and I absolutely love it. It also reminds me of Los Bitchos who were on one of my secret lost playlists from December so it's nice to have their vibe represented here at least. This song also interestingly ties into a thought I was having this week about the limits of music wherein time is the only immutable constant. In all of life music is an inescapable constant of course, but in music especially compared to visual art or written art, time is an inexorable force. You simply cannot bend time in music, a song or performance will always have a duration that will define it, short or long, which cannot be muted or played with in the same way that rhythm or tonality can. 4'33" is a good example of that, being devoid of everything except time. When there is nothing, there is still time. Canyons of time.

Bad Magic - Weyes Blood: I got to see Weyes Blood a couple of weeks ago and I feel extremely blessed that I did. She's just amazing. She played this song solo as her last encore, and she's in a sort of interesting position of blowing up majorly on her fourth album so people (myself included) weren't overly familiar with her older stuff. So when she said 'this is a song called Bad Magic' everyone clapped politely and one woman right up the back screamed "oh my GOD??" which is the kind of personal, just for her, singular experience I'm always here for. Hearing this song for the first time in that setting has really made me fall in love with it. The thing that's always alienated me a little abot Weyes Blood's earlier work, and the thing she changed so dramatically on Titanic Rising is the structuring of her songs. Titanic Rising embraces pop songwriting so wonderfully where her earlier work was so much shaggier and harder to access as a result - but in this song I love it. This song is meandering and long and wanders around in circles and I'm here for every second of it.

Listen to this playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3ZraEZOeS6qvVxfnz3AJS9

[preferredrealty]

Wrong Place, Wrong Time - A Mob!Shawn Mendes Series.

Part 4 - Business Trips and Bruises

Part 5

Masterlist

Warnings: Blood

As always: Feedback is appreciated 💛🌻

(Y/N) smiled sweetly down at a small boy who was now inhaling the massive banana split she had set on the table, setting a few spare napkins down on the table, knowing they would be needed. 

Walking back into the kitchen she pulled her phone out of her apron as it chimed at the same time the bell of the door rang. Opening her phone quickly she looked at the text with a grin. 

iMessage from Shawn: Table for 3?

Leaning over the stainless steel metal she peek out the hole in the wall seeing Shawn standing with the two guys from the ally that night. Deloris peaked out next to her chuckling. "You're turning this place into a gangster pit-stop." (Y/N) shook her head nudging Deloris with her hip. It had been a week and a day since the night at the beach, when Shawn wasn't texting her, he was here. She would never admit it but seeing Shawn was the highlight of her day lately. "Oh hush." She smiled at Deloris pushing through the swinging door, Shawn's eyes instantly catching hers.

She grabbed her note pad on her way out from behind the counter, walking past them casting a glance at Shawn. "Table for three this way boys." Hearing Shawn chuckle, she stopped at a more private booth leaning against one of the booths. "Hey (Y/N/N), how was your day off yesterday?" He greeted throwing a arm over her shoulders as Brian and Connor nudged their way into the side of the booth she wasn't leaning on. "It was interrupted by a curly haired devil." She teased.

She cringed as Brian took off his sunglasses revealing the healing bruises of two back eyes. She mouthed a 'sorry' to him making him cast a small smile. "Well you've kind of met Brian and this is Connor." Shawn introduced them as he moved to sit in his booth. "Nice to meet you both." She grinned pulling open a new page of her note pad. "What can I get for y'all today?" "I'll take my usual please." Shawn grinned as she rolled her eyes. "I want to try that strawberry milkshake Shawn keeps going on about." Brian said glancing at the menu. "Actually you know what, I'll just take the same as Shawn." He said with a smile. Connor doing the same. 

"Alright I'll have that out with you as soon as possible." (Y/N) smiles walking back the counter, pinning up the order with the rest and starting on the milk shakes.

-

"So she's playing dumb about the whole thing?" Connor said as he played with the salt shaker on the table. "She hasn't brought it up but I know she knows." Shawn sighed glancing up seeing (Y/N) chatting with Deloris as she made the milkshakes. "Well she just mouthed an apology to me, so she knows." Brian muttered as Shawn and Connor laughed. "You got your ass handed to you by a girl." Connor wheezed holding his sides as he laughed. "I'll stab you, I swear some day I will." Brian groaned. Shawn shook his head at his two friends looking back at (Y/N) seeing her walking back with the three milkshakes balancing on a tray. 

"Food won't be long boys." She smiled placing the tray down, passing out the drinks. Shawn patted the seat next to him signalling for her to slide in, glancing around she realised the lunch time rush was over, giving her time to sit. Brian and Connor took a sip of their milkshakes, both groaning at the same time. "This is amazing." Brian said, making (Y/N) smile. 

Seeing Deloris coming out carrying two trays of food (Y/N) rushed to help her, passing out the food she nodded with a smile. "Shawn." She grinned. "Boys." She said to Brian and Connor before walking away. "Well I have work to do, enjoy your food guys." She patted Shawn's arm before following Deloris to the kitchen, mindlessly cleaning. 

"So-" Deloris started making (Y/N) groan. "Is he like, your boyfriend now?" A blush burned across (Y/N)'s face making her hide in her hands. "He's my friend." was all (Y/N) said, grabbing a new batch of cookies walking out to the counter to set them up in the glass casing. She could hear Shawn's laughter from where she stood making her lips quiver into a smile. "You don't smile about friends like that." A mans voice said next to her. 

Greg the chef was stood leaning against the counter sipping a steaming cup of coffee now that he had time for a break. "Oh hush not you too!" (Y/N) giggles swatting at the slightly older man, Greg was attractive, she wasn't going to lie. Attractive in a, could be your friend from schools hot dad. (Y/N) poured herself a cup of coffee, leaning next to him as they chatted. 

She could feel eyes burning into her as she talked to Greg causing her to look at Shawn who quickly looked back at Connor and Brian. "Someone's Jel!" Deloris whispered as she walked past. "I swear! You two are going to drive me insane." (Y/N) groaned drinking more coffee.

-

(Y/N) was waving bye to a customer who came in for takeout as Shawn came up to the counter handing over money for the bill, telling (Y/N) to put the change in the tip jar. "So-" He started sitting on one of the bar stools. "I'm going out of town for a week for..." He paused to find a word making (Y/N) nod while looking at the counter. "Business trip?.." She tried making him nod with a sad smile. "Don't know what I'll do without my fix of Strawberry milkshake for a week." (Y/N) let out a breathy laugh. "I'm sure you'll find somewhere that does a good shake wherever you're going." She blushed as Shawn took her hand playing with the thin rings on her pointer and pinky finger. "I don't think I'll ever find one that compares to yours." The blush from before just darkens as she pulls her hand away, walking around the counter having Shawn pull her into a hug and kissing the top of her head. "I'll see you soon Baby." He smiles, giving her a final squeeze before walking out the door.

- Thursday passed fast, so did Friday and Saturday. Sunday, the diner was closed, she had been texting back and forward with Shawn the entire day but when the clock hit 8pm on Sunday evening the replies stopped. All day Monday she didn't hear a peep. She was spaced out during work, the day passing before she knew it and then Tuesday came. 

She went about her day, shopping, meeting friends. She stopped by the diner to have lunch with Deloris her break, walked along the beach, where Shawn flood her thought to the point where she stopped at a store to buy snacks before heading home to binge watch Disney+

She had just settled into her grey cotton shorts and red 'life guard' hoodie when she heard a thump for her front door. She stood still for a moment, blood rushing to her ears as she eyed her door, another thump then a small voice made her strain even more to hear what it was. 

"(Y/N/N)" She heard a week voice say making her run to the door pulling it open. Shawn lay slumped against the door frame on the floor his legs splayed out in front of him, one hand tucked under his jacket, placed firmly on his ribs, the other lay limp in his lap, bloody and bruised. "Shawn!" (Y/N) cried out dropping to her knees, her hands gently cupped his face looking into his eyes, one partly swollen. "Shawn.." She whispered as he finally focused on her. "Hey baby." He grinned, wincing as the split in his lip bled more, the blood mixing into his teeth making him cringe at the metallic taste. 

(Y/N) looked around the hall of her apartment block, sighing in relief that nobody was there to witness this. "Come on." She huffed out a breath pulling Shawn's heavy lanky body off the floor, into her apartment and closed the door behind her. Setting him down gently on her bed she rushed to grab a damp cloth and the first aid kit she kept encase of an accident under her sink. When she returned Shawn was passed out, his chest rising and falling evenly making her sigh as she began to clean him up. - After getting Shawn cleaned up and a few paper stitches on his lip (Y/N) threw a blanket over him, adjusting the pillow under his head before making her way to the small plush chair she used as a desk chair, pulling it to the side of the bed Shawn was lying in, sitting next to him. "Jesus Christ." She ran her hands over her face before making herself comfortable. Eventually drifting off to sleep.

When she woke again, she was in the bed next to Shawn with his arm laid over her stomach. She looked over at him to see his eyes looking back at her. "Thank you." He whispered, eyes flooding with guilt. "Shawn what ha-" She was cut off by Shawn shaking his head. "Can we just sleep? I'll tell you anything you want to know in the morning." He sighed, pulling her closer. Nodding, (Y/N) shifted so she had her back to Shawn's chest, sleep taking over her as Shawn pressed a kiss to the back of her head.

-

"Thanks Deloris, I owe you one. See you tomorrow." Shawn stirred from his spot in bed, turning over he slowly peeled his eyes open. Feeling the dryness of his throat prompted him to stand from the bed walking out into the living area of (Y/N)'s apartment.

She stood in the centre of the room, pushing her phone back into her hoodie pocket after finishing her conversation with Deloris. Shawn's eyes drifted over her legs, the cotton shorts giving him a nice view. (Y/N) cleared her throat grabbing his attention. "Sorry." He rasped out, following (Y/N) as she nodded towards the kitchen area. 

Shawn gratefully took the glass of water from her as she pulled herself up onto the counter, watching him gulp down the water. He shifted under her sharp stare, feeling like a child about to get yelled at. Walking over to her, he stood between her legs, trying to pull out the puppy dog eyes on her. (Y/N) scoffed and grabbed his chin with one hand. "Doesn't work when your face is beat to shit Shawn!" She pushed him away enough for her to jump down, making her way back to her bedroom. 

Following close behind Shawn leaned on the door frame, watching as she lifted her mattress revealing a storage area under it with some box and clothes folded neatly in it. Pulling out a large chunk of black material she threw it towards him before pulling the sheets off her bed walking towards the laundry room. "Your shirt is covered in blood.." She muttered walking past him. 

Quickly changing into the hoodie she had given him, he cringed at the thought that it might be her ex's hoodie. Walking back into the living room he found her sitting on the couch with her knees pulled to her chest. Sitting at the other side of the couch Shawn sighed. "I'm sorry Baby. I was out of it last night...I don't know why but I just thought it would be safer for me to come see you than go home." (Y/N) chewed on her nails and her mind began to spin. "When I said I'd give you a chance Shawn...I know what I was getting into but I never expected your..lifestyle to come directly to my front door." Shawn nodded looking down at his hands. "I thought I could do it Shawn, thought I would be able to get over it because - well because you're an amazing person to be around but I can't do it Shawn. I'm scared. Scared that being involved with you will get me hurt." 

Shawn felt the air get stuck in his chest as his head turned to look at her, her eyes focused on the floor in front of her, lip stuck between her teeth and tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. "Baby I-" He stopped before nodding. "If that's what you want..I understand." He stood, his arms falling in defeat at his sides. "I'm sorry (Y/N)." He whispered pressing a kiss to the top of her head, rushing to put on his shoes and out her front door. 

It wasn't until (Y/N) heard the echo of foot steps echoing down the metal stairs that a sob broke from her chest, grabbing one of the fluffy cushions stuffing her face into it. 

- Shawn paused once he was outside her apartment building, the door slamming behind him making him flinch. He turned back, his finger hovering over the button to apartment 4C before he shook his head, pulling the black hood up over his bruised face and walking away. 

Unaware of the men parked in a  black jeep across the road keeping a close eye on him, memorising the button he was about to press.

[fuckyeahprodigalson]

Here, showrunners Chris Fedak and Sam Sklaver preview what's next.

What can we expect from Paul, or should I say John, having Bright? More memories for Bright? More insight into John? That dynamic is so entertaining.

Chris Fedak: You're going to get plenty of that in Episode 11, along with some of the most insane things we've done so far. If you think we've pushed the envelope in the first 10 episodes, Episode 11 is waiting out there to beat you up. It's an incredibly insane episode. It's not only going to have action and suspense and all those things we love, but it's also going to have a great psychological duel between Bright and John Watkins.

Sam Sklaver: Watkins was there with the Surgeon back in 1998 and they knew each other and they confided in each other the way that only two serial killers could. John knows a lot about Bright's past that Bright's also going to want to hear. We're going to get a lot of insight into their relationship.

Dr. Whitly is back in Episode 11 as well, because just having Watkins and Bright together isn't enough. We also get to see Dr. Whitly and Gil Arroyo together. [It's] a pretty explosive episode we're so proud of.

As a result of Bright being kidnapped, will we see more of Gil, Dani, and JT with Jessica and Ainsley?

Fedak: Absolutely. Episode 11 is definitely almost a real-time thriller in the way it plays out. ... Having 12 more episodes gives us the chance to really explore those characters and also just give them time to get together.

Sklaver: Our show really harmonizes the best when a case and the family are intertwined throughout, and it's something we're always looking to do.

Who has the most trouble dealing with Bright's kidnapping? Obviously his family is deeply worried.

Sklaver: My mind went to Dani. [She's] really itching at the surface because as we learned, Dani doesn't have many friends and Bright's one of her closest ones. It's hard to say Bright's mother or father wouldn't feel it the most, but there's something in the relationship that Dani and Bright have where she is really pushed in this moment to find her friend in a very exciting way. An argument could be made for everyone. When Dr. Whitly finds out....

Fedak: One of the things that's exciting about 11 too is we will be getting Dr. Whitly out of solitary and that's going to be a big part of the search for Bright.

Obviously Bright is going to survive, but what can you say about how this experience with John will change him?

Fedak: It's going to deeply change him. I'm not even going to promise you that he's going to survive. As a storyteller I refuse to do it, even though there are hopefully many seasons of the show after this.

Every time we look at Bright's arc in an episode and especially in the first half of the season, building up into this crescendo of Episodes 10 and 11, we want to test the bounds of what he's gone through and essentially push him. This is going to change him inextricably and it's going to be a challenge and something he has to deal with. We have this amazing actor in Tom Payne and he's able to capture not only the pathos and the pain of it all, but he's incredibly fascinating to watch as he does it.

Shannon is dead, right? This isn't one of those they could possibly get to him in time for a miraculous save situations.

Fedak: That is 1000% a dead man. There's so much blood on the table, I don't even know [if] with the superpowers of Greg Berlanti, we could bring him back to life.

Sklaver: Which is a shame because we loved Sean in the role and we loved the turn he was able to make, going from an adversary and this terrible nightmare of a man for young Bright to someone they could actually connect and then eventually have fun with. When we realized he had to be killed, it really made us sad. What's fun about our show dropping around in time is when we go back to 1998, which we often do, Sean is someone we can bring back and we probably, hopefully will because his performance was so amazing.

What did you want to do by showing a different cop in Shannon from Gil, Dani, and JT and with Shannon and Bright's dynamic?

Sklaver: He has the more normal approach to it, which is, this serial killer's whole family has to be messed up. There's no way that Jessica didn't know what was happening. There's no way his kids didn't know what was happening. This is a very popular conception that a lot of people have and Shannon was very helpful to show us that.

Young Bright saved [Gil's] life. He knew from the beginning that young Bright wasn't a bad person, but Shannon didn't. It explains a lot of the reasons Jessica, Bright, and Ainsley are who they are today. A lot of their defense mechanisms they built up over time are because of people like Shannon, who never believed they were actually good people.

I loved Jessica throwing her shoe into Bright's TV, which was one way of coping, but we then see her taking back control by talking to the press at the end of the episode. Where does she go from there?

Sklaver: She's now on the hunt. She wants to put her husband away for a very, very long time. At Claremont Psychiatric, with the privileges Martin has set up, he's way too available to still be in their lives. Jessica really wants to put him into solitary forever or, fingers crossed, get him in the chair. She is driven, and this is really going to be a path we're going to follow her on, to find another victim, and no good deed goes unpunished.

Fedak: It's a very dangerous path. She's putting herself out there. It's a big deal for her. It's definitely about her owning her past, but she's stepping into a very dangerous world.

[ronyxfic]

Educating the Victim - Act VI, Chapter XXV

Pairing: Rose Quartz/Pearl, Rose/Greg

Rating: Mature

Warnings/Tags: mild injury

CHAPTER 35: Power Cut

 As the line clicked, the lights flickered again. As if on cue, Pearl's phone buzzed, warning her that she only had 5% battery left.

"Oh boy," she said, more to herself, and got her charger. She plugged it in and then awkwardly sat on the floor next to the plug, since she wasn't really going to abandon her phone.

Hope Rose is okay.

She decided to text Amethyst.

Hey, you up to much?

  Amethyst took a couple of minutes to respond.

Ya, just finished up looking over notes. I'm free now, tho

  Awesome! Proud of you! Do you want to call? The lights over here keep flickering and I'm a bit spooked, wouldn't mind some company.

  Aw, yea, sure. I'm here for you. Just lemme know when.         

  About now, if that's okay?

 Amethyst called her then, "Hey," she said as Pearl picked up. "You'll never guess where I've actually been all day."

 "Hey! So, where have you been all day? At home, studying, by any chance?"

 "Well, I spent half of it at school. Lazuli ran some English revision session thing she emailed me about, and no one else showed up. It was actually... really good? I was even sober for it. She's caught me high before."

 "Oh hey, that's really good! Was it productive? Who knew Lazuli had it in her to be actually helpful," Pearl said, laughing, slightly embarrassed - since it was a studying session she'd missed, and in fact, hadn't even known about.

 "Yeah! It was insane! She even rapped at me in iambic parameter, which was weird as hell but surprisingly... helpful? Anyway, I was real surprised you didn't show up."

 "Yeah, I... must've missed the email," Pearl said, putting the phone on speaker and navigating to the email app. "Wait, I can't even see if I got it at all. Could be in spam? I don't know." Her phone flashed another warning at her as the lights went out. Pearl gasped, but a split second later, the lights came on again. "Oh god. The lights are doing the thing again. There isn't gonna be actual demons here, is there? Also, my phone is running low on battery, so that's fun."

 "NOOO! You said! What's happening over there? Is Quartz's place haunted?"

 "I don't know." Pearl shuddered. "I hope not. Like, I don't really... believe in ghosts and all that supernatural shit. And this didn't happen yesterday."

 "Huh. Maybe something is up with your lightbulb. Get that guy you're living with to take a look if he's good with that kinda stuff?"

 Pearl hesitated for a long moment.

"Uh. I haven't... really talked to Greg yet. It's kinda really awkward."

 "What? But, dude! You live with him. He's okay. Quartz likes him so he's got to be safe and everything, right?"

 Pearl's shoulders slumped. "I guess," she said. "It's just... weird, ya know? I mean, me and Rose used to be... dating, I guess."

 "So? That doesn't mean you can't try and get along. I get along with Quartz, don't I? And we... did things, I guess?"

 "Well, yeah, but she's your teacher! Our teacher. I don't know. Ugh." Pearl sighed. "Are you suggesting I should go talk to him about my superstitions?"

 "Or ask him to look at the fuse box. Dude, how are you planning to survive living at uni?"

 "Well, hopefully by not sharing a place with someone who's involved with someone I got history with."

 "Hm. You never know. But seriously. Just go talk to him. The man looks like a living teddy bear."

 "Hmpf. Maybe later. What are you up to now?"

 "Oh, just chilling out now I'm done studying. And talking to you, obviously," Amethyst said. "Really looking forward to that party that's coming up, been feeling like a total recluse."

 "Oh yeah! It'll be great! Have you heard much from everyone?"

 "Nothing more than the group chat. I'll have to try and pay Ruby back since they're gonna get us that pizza."

 "Oh, pizza sounds nice. That reminds me, I should think about dinner quite soon."

 "That's a good idea. You've been eating enough, right?"

 "Yeah," Pearl said. It wasn't even a lie. "I've been making sure I don't fall into old patterns again."

 "Oh, P! You're doing good, you've been looking better recently, too. We should meet up soon."

 "Please," Pearl said. "Are you around tomorrow?"

 "Should be, after the exam?"

 "Yeah, deffo! Though I might want to see Lazuli at some point as well," Amethyst replied. "You could tag along and get lunch after?"

 "Yeah, that sounds good! I should probably go, though. I'll text you?"

 "Sure thing!" Amethyst seemed jubilant at the prospect. "It would be nice to go with you somewhere a little more classy at some point."

 "Oh... that can be arranged." Pearl smiled. "I'll have a look and pick a place. See you tomorrow!"

 "Alright! See ya!"

 Pearl hung up, and checked her phone: 4% - it was charging, but the phone call had drained more battery than could be regained in this short a time.

She sighed and put down the phone. Probably time to do something that didn't require her phone. Hey, hadn't Rose mentioned something about books?

Pearl had a look at the shelves, examining Rose's extensive collection of books - not just school books and non-fiction, but a load of fiction as well. Heavy books. Pearl frowned, reached out to grab one of the books.

And then, the lights went out.

Pearl gasped, froze in place for several seconds, expecting the light to go back on, like it had before.

It didn't.

"Okay," she said, "well, shit. Uh."

Her phone was emitting a small amount of light, so Pearl went towards it, and saw that it wasn't charging anymore. So it was all the electricity, not just the lights.

And her best bet was that the entire house was affected, not just her room.

 Meanwhile, Greg had been preparing himself dinner in the kitchen below. Soup was simmering in the hob in a small soup pan. He made a noise of surprise as the lights all switched off, noticing that the gas in the oven was still lighting the room. He glanced out of the window but couldn't see if the neighbours had also been affected.

He clumsily waded to the staircase, tripping over a chair. "Pearl?"

 Pearl heard. "Fuck!" she whispered under her breath.

Well, this wasn't really how she would have wanted to encounter Greg.

She opened the door to the corridor, carefully made her way to the stairs. "I'm here," she said. "You ok?"

 "Yeah, I was just making sure you weren't too freaked out! Power outage, huh? I can go and check if the block is affected."

 Pearl clutched her phone, hesitant to use it for light since the battery was so low. "Yeah, sounds like a plan," she said. "Uh, Rose said you know where the fuse box is? I can,  er, check that out?"

 "The basement." Greg swallowed, awkward. "It's down there. I, uh, should do it..." There was an odd pang of anxiety in his voice.

 Pearl picked up on it. "I can do it," she said, "I've got my phone. Do you know if there's any torches or candles around?"

 "Uh, I can look. I think Rose keeps scented ones in her bedroom." Greg rubbed his chin. "Oh yeah! she got them out when-" He looked at Pearl, pausing as his eyes widened.

 Pearl caught his drift, and her shoulders slumped a little bit. “Well, I guess if they’re good enough for that, they’re good enough for lighting the house during an outage,” she said, trying not to let her bitterness bleed into her voice. “You can get those if you want, I’ll try to find the switchboard in the basement.”

 "I have no idea where she keeps the matches. You don't happen to smoke, do ya?" He scratched his head. "If you had a light, it would be ideal."

 Pearl glanced at him, feeling caught out. “I... should have a lighter here somewhere,” she muttered, and then handed it over. Her zippo. “I want it back, though,” she said. “Uh, good luck?”

 "Oh, bad girl." Greg chucked. "Thanks, I'll join ya when I get the candles going."

 Pearl turned wordlessly and tried to navigate her way through the dark house. She didn’t dare touch her phone in case she needed it more later.

She felt her way around the hallway, and ran into a solid mass. “Ow! Shit!”

 Greg heard the cursing as he waded to Rose's room, hands carefully outstretched to guide him. "You okay?" He yelled, hoping to be heard.

 “Yeah, I’m good, just ran into a... thing,” she called back. It looked like a small cabinet, positioned just next to a door.

“Oh, I guess I found it,” Pearl muttered to herself as she opened the door to face an impossibly even darker basement.

She felt her way forward, felt for a handrail on the stairs.

 Greg shuffled around the room, opening shelves beside the bed. He closed his eyes, muttering. "Think... Universe, think. Where were they when she tied you u- Oh!" He glanced beside him, and opened a small cabinet door, with an array of familiar candles inside. "Gotcha!"

 Just then there was an almighty crash as Pearl tripped and fell down the last remaining steps.

“Fuck!”

Okay, her knee had been a bit sore after she ran into the cabinet. But now it was really hurting, and Pearl wasn’t sure she was going to be able to move.

 Greg didn't quite hear it as he lit the candle, allowing a sharp yelp as the flame hit his thumb. But, he was successful in his venture, the warm glow licking his face.

"I'm coming! Got the candles!" He yelled as he made his way to the stairs.

 “Careful on the stairs,” Pearl called out, shifting. “Ow. Fuck.”

 He heard Pearl's cursing this time, but frowned as he slowed down. He glanced to the bottom of the stairwell. "Hey, you alright there, Pearl?"

 “Uh, I may have fallen down the stairs,” she said through her teeth. “My knee fucking hurts.”

 Greg treaded down, carefully peering over her. He gave a little gasp. "Oh geeze, oh man, are you gonna need to go to see someone? Here, can you hold a candle?"

 Pearl was grateful for the light. She took the candle from Greg and put it down next to her. “Just don’t stumble over it,” she said. “Uh.” She touched her knee, pulled a face, and tried to move it. “Ow, ow, ow,” she said, but found that it was not impossible. “On the plus side, I don’t think anything’s broken.”

 "Alright." Greg nodded. "Do you want me to take a look?"

 Pearl turned her face. “No, it should be okay, but thanks. Uh, you could find the fusebox?”

 "Sure thing. I think I can see it over there." He tried to make it over, holding his own candle out. "I'll see if any of the switches are down."

 “Okay.” Pearl held her knee. “Ugh, I hope I haven’t busted my knee again.”

 "Me too. It was real bad last time, right?" Greg opened the box and glanced inside, frowning. "That's not good."

 Pearl looked at him. “Did Rose... tell you about all that?” She then frowned. “What’s up with the fusebox?”

 "Well, yeah, I asked. I was interested in her relationship with you." Greg shrugged as he turned around. "None of the switches are down like I thought they'd be. It might be a bigger problem we might need to wait out." He fiddled with the switches. "Nope. Shit."

 Pearl watched, frowned. "You sure you're not breaking anything over there?"

She wasn't quite sure how to feel about the fact that Rose and Greg had talked about her. About their relationship.

 "Yeah, this is how I usually do it. I think it might be better if we got upstairs and I went to check out the rest of the street."

 "Okay. Well." Pearl tried to move her leg, grimaced. "I don't know if I'll be able to move. I, uh, I can stay here while you check what's going on outside?"

 "You sure? I could try calling an ambulance, too."

 “No!” Pearl said reflexively. “I – I mean,” she hastily added, “I’m sure it’s okay, I’ll be fine, this is more important.”

 "I don't want to leave you here all alone, Pearl." Greg rubbed at his neck. "Not in the basement."

 Pearl found her shoulders slumping a bit. “You don’t need to be worried about me.”

 "Yeah? Well I am. Do you really want to be stuck down here with barely any light?"

 Pearl sighed. “I’ll be okay! I’m sure it’s just a temporary thing. And there’s candles here, and you could, I don’t know, leave the lighter just in case? We need to know what’s going on, surely that’s more important than me being in the basement.”

 "Alright." Greg swallowed. "If you're sure."

 “Yeah I’m sure. I’ve still got my phone as well.” Pearl finally looked at him and tried to give him a reassuring smile. “It’s fine, go on.”

 Greg carried himself to the stairs, nervously looking over his candle. "Text me if anything goes wrong, okay?"

 “Sure.” Pearl was fairly sure she didn’t have his number, but she probably wouldn’t need it. “It’s fine.”

 "Alrighty." He began to ascend, "I'll see you in ten and let you know if there's any news."

 “Okay! Uh, have fun!” She didn’t really know why she said that.

A gust of air came from the door to the basement as Greg left, and the candle next to Pearl flickered.

   Greg swiftly made it out of the house, grabbing a brown jacket and closing the door after giving the direction of the basement a small look. "Hope you'll be okay, bud." She had to be, right?

[schraubd]

Election 2018: Post-Mortem

We're not 100% "post-" yet, as there are still a decent number of races outstanding. Here in California, the mail vote could yet push around some House race numbers (though Montana just was called for Jon Tester!). Nonetheless, we've got enough of a picture to give a pretty solid account of yesterday's events. Here are my takeaways: * * * Dems winning the House is huge: This was not something to take for granted. Let's not forget, there was a good chunk of time where people thought GOP gerrymandering had placed the House out of Democratic reach. And control of the House doesn't just prevent Congress from ramming through far-right pieces of the Trump agenda. It also gives Democrats a key fulcrum from which to launch investigations into the deep cesspool of corruption that characterizes the Trump administration. On that score, I actually don't recommend starting with Trump necessarily. There are so many targets to choose from, and if there's one thing I think we learned from how the GOP handled the Benghazi (non-)story, it's that a steady and constant drip-drip-drip of scandal is far more powerful than blowing everything in one shot. Start with easy marks like Zinke, and the noose will slowly begin to tighten around the inner circle. This was a continuation, not a reversal, of 2016's trend: One theory about 2016 was that it was a fit of temporary insanity, whereby good-hearted Americans had a bout of temporary insanity or rage or anti-Clinton derangement and chose a President whom they didn't really endorse or even like. Under this view, 2018 would be a "snapback" election, where these voters would revert to form and go back to supporting sensible candidates while repudiating Trump's extremism. Another theory about 2016 takes Trump voters more seriously. It posits that in certain very conservative parts of the country -- generally more rural, generally less-educated, concentrated in Appalachia and the American southeast -- they liked Trump, and they continue to like Trump. All the lying and racism and extremism and utter off-the-wall demagoguery -- the love it. Meanwhile, other parts of the country -- more suburban, more diverse, and especially in the southwest -- were moving away from Trump and Trumpism. Last night, I think, decisively ratifies the second theory. By and large, the people who like Trump still like Trump. Rick Scott's numbers in Florida were almost perfectly correlated with the 2016 presidential race. And at the same time, we saw a more decisive shift away from the GOP in the sort of districts where people already didn't like Trump. From what I saw, Democrats did better in Romney-Clinton districts than Obama-Trump ones, which verifies this instinct. And Democrats are continuing to make big strides in Nevada and (yes, even in defeat) Arizona and Texas. The partial exception to this view is the midwest (where Democrats won governorships in Wisconsin and Michigan, and a decent clutch of House seats as well). But even here, the news was mixed: Democrats lost the Senate races in Indiana and Missouri, the governorship in Iowa (albeit while winning 3 of 4 House seats) and Ohio, and their two pickups in Minnesota House races were offset by at least one and probably two GOP flips (which were some of the only such GOP wins nationwide). There is a truth that is important for pundits to get through their head: conservative Americans like Trump. He's not an aberration. He's not deus ex machina. He's not someone they begrudgingly tolerate. American conservativism, right now, is Donald Trump. If that's a scary thought -- and it is -- start reporting it like something scary rather than pretending that most Republicans basically pine for Gerald Ford but somehow got sucked into an authoritarian nightmare they wish they could escape from. State Races Matter The national focus also has somewhat obscured how Democrats did on the state level. A bucket of governor's mansions have just turned blue -- Maine, Wisconsin, Illinois, Michigan, New Mexico, Nevada, and Kansas -- and there were no blue-to-red flips (solid holds in Connecticut, Pennsylvania, Minnesota, Oregon, and Colorado). And it looks like they've turned over at least six state legislative chambers too -- not bad! Priority #1 in any state with Democratic majority: lock in voting rights. It's embarrassing that a state like New York has a train wreck of a voting system, and it needs to end immediately. Republicans really did overperform Senate side Yes, it was a brutally tough map for the Democrats. But Republicans nonetheless exceeded at least gameday expectations. Democrats taking back the Senate was always a longshot, but if the GOP holds onto their leads in Arizona and Florida (likely), then they'll have come close to running the table on their best realistic Senate scenario (with only Montana and Nevada as the blemishes). That's legitimate GOP ammo for the spin cycle. And, of course, it does give Trump the ability to continue to pack the courts with right-wing ideologues, which is substantively terrifying. The Democratic Party Neither Needs To Pivot Left Nor Pivot Center The favored post-election parlor of any pundit after an election is to explain why the results decisively demonstrate why a given party needs to adopt the political positions they already supported. Among Democrats, this has typically shaken out along the Bernie/Establishment divide that we're apparently doomed to relive forever because this is The Bad Place. But the fact is, there was no clear trend in which sort of Democrats were winning and losing last night. A bunch of more conservative voices went down in the Senate, but in states which were already punishing turf. And some progressive darlings -- like Ben Jealous in Maryland and Andrew Gillum in Florida -- lost too. On the other side, some establishment picks did their job and won their race (think Jacky Rosen in Nevada, or Gretchen Whitmer in Michigan). But progressives had their stars too -- Beto O'Rourke's campaign in Texas certainly performed better than Texas's red tint should've allowed, and there were a bunch of more progressive challengers who are among the entering House class. Which is to say: different races are different, and different candidates are good fits for different districts. The Party isn't the enemy here. What I think has been shown is that the more extreme "Bernie" accusation -- that there were a bunch of winnable races that Democrats were quasi-deliberately letting go Republican because something-something-corporate-money, and if we only ran Real Democrats they'd be ours -- has been decisively refuted (I don't think Ben Jealous necessarily did worse than Rushern Baker would have done in Maryland, but he certainly didn't do better). But that was a colossally stupid take anyway. Which probably means it still won't die the death it deserves. Briefly on Beto -- Yes, He Deserves Praise This isn't even a hot take anymore but obviously O'Rourke deserves a ton of credit for how he performed in his race against Ted Cruz. I'm seeing some mockery from the usual conservative suspects on this, since he lost, but that's a dumb take. Yes a loss is a loss, and yes everyone hates Ted Cruz, and yes Texas has been slowly purpling. But a sub-three point victory in a statewide race in Texas (by contrast, Governor Greg Abbott -- no political superstar -- won reelection by 13 points) is a monster performance. And his tailwind likely carried a few House races over the finish line as well. The New Redemption is (Sort of) Upon Us I'm by no means the first to come up with the idea that we're going through a "second redemption" to undo the "second reconstruction" that was the civil rights era. But I think there is something to be said about the re-energizing of White racist attitudes that's occurred in America over the last few years. People have talked a lot about Trump and, before him, the Tea Party, not so much creating prejudice as "activating" it. I think that in places like Georgia or Florida, there was some demoralization among the White racist crowd where they had basically given up on the possibility that open racism was something they could "do" anymore. Now, they're downright jazzed -- and from that we get both Kemp and DeSantis likely entering a governor's mansion. That said, the story does seem too pat in some ways -- especially with the passage of Amendment 4 (felon re-enfranchisement) in Florida. It's no exaggeration to say this might put Democrats firmly in the driver's seat in a state as evenly divided as Florida (a full 40% of Black male adults in the state regained their right to vote through this measure), which makes it all the more surprising that it managed to clear the 60% threshold. And to be fair, some amount of credit thus has to be given to those voters who punched a ballot for both Amendment 4 and DeSantis/Scott (there must be a lot of them). One-State Wave! With Rashida Tlaib's victory in Michigan, we not only have our first Palestinian-American Congresswomen, we also will have the first Democratic Representative to openly support a one-state solution to the Israeli/Palestinian conflict. She will join approximately 2/3 of the House Republican Caucus in taking this view (and if you're a pro-Israel type who's about to respond "that's not fair -- Republicans only support a one-state solution where Palestinians aren't allowed to vote!" stop and listen to yourself). Mixed Results for Anti-Semites Tablet did a whole bit on "antisemites running for Congress", but I found their list far too restrictive (or in a few cases -- most notably Rep. Andrew Carson and GOP challenger Lena Epstein -- too expansive). Overall, it seems like the worst-of-the-worst antisemites -- the open Holocaust denier sorts -- lost, but some more "moderate" cases did fine. I may do a more in-depth exploration of this later. Early Frustration is Misleading There did seem to be an extent which last night felt like a letdown for Democrats. Obviously, the Senate is a clear case where that sentiment is justified. At the same time, it seemed like the night got better for Democrats as it went on -- a couple of races which seemed to be slipping away (Wisconsin, Connecticut) broke blue late, and some of our biggest victories (Nevada) were also well into the evening. On net, there's no question this was a big night for the good guys. via The Debate Link https://ift.tt/2AQsRAy

[redditnosleep]

The Cat Lady

by theoddcatlady

I used to have three beautiful cats. Chloe, Jewel, and Mercy. My sweet girls. I had the perfect family. A husband Greg, my son Dylan, and of course the cats. Jewel was the snitch. Always pacing around the table, warbling for whatever we had. She had developed a taste for green beans. Mercy was the prim lady. Always cleaning herself. Always sitting on the bookshelves. And always found where I hid the cat treats.

Chloe was my favorite though. Whenever my lap was available, she was sitting there. At night she’d sleep at the foot of the bed. In the morning, she’d wake me by kneading my chest. Greg would laugh and say she was just making sure my heart hadn’t stopped. Her version of kitty CPR.

Greg and I were considering getting just one more when the accident happened. Greg was on the way to the clinic with the cats to update their vaccinations, and… well, I’m almost thankful that my babies didn’t suffer.

I lost my cats and my husband all at once. Dylan was already a grown man, and after barely four months after the loss he took off for college. I was all alone in my house, and my broken heart showed no sign of mending. Dylan barely came to visit, and after the first five years I was lucky to get a card for Christmas.

I became the ‘old crazy witch’ on the block with a dead husband. The kids made up their stories, I mostly just sat on my front porch and enjoyed the sun when it came out- the heat made my sore joints feel better.

Then I met Goliath.

My neighborhood is very close to a wooded park. On my days off from work at the grocery store Greg and I used to walk down those quiet paths. But there was also a feral cat problem there. I’d catch only glimpses of their skinny bodies and wild eyes.

But while I knitted on the front porch one morning, a streak of fur caught my attention, and I saw him. Immediately I dubbed him Goliath.

He was enormous. A tomcat that was bigger than some dogs, he had a mean face, matted long fur, and torn up ears. But he had the same coloring as Chloe, black with mottled orange and brown.

He came to a stop in front of the porch and froze, staring at me. I stared back. His tail twitched. His amber eyes bore right into mine.

“… Here, kitty kitty.”

Goliath slowly stepped closer to the porch, stopping at the steps. When I got up and tried to get closer, Goliath darted away and ran into the bushes. He didn’t trust me.

But I was so lonely. Even big old mean cat like that could give me some sort of companionship.

I went inside and got some canned tuna, opening it up and setting it at the steps. After I retreated to my chair, Goliath returned. He smelled the tuna. He licked his chops and stared at the can, but he was nervous around me. So I went inside. When I came back a few minutes later, Goliath was focused on licking out the can.

I made a friend that day.

Goliath took forever to get used to me, the mistrusting kitty who had never felt a human’s touch. But he didn’t leave, he took to sleeping in the tire swing in the front yard. Greg never got around to taking the damn thing down when Dylan grew too old for it. Goliath showed up for lunch every day, I’d feed him tuna and chatter to him. He’d purr like a semi truck.

Then one day he brought a date- a gray tabby with a short tail and a missing eye.

I went to the store that night and invested in bulk bags of dry food and the canned stuff.

Duchess, the gray tabby, didn’t hesitate to make herself at home in the tree outside. Neither did the others. It was a trickle, and never consistent. One day I’d just have Goliath and Duchess, the next there would be six or seven meowing babies ready for lunch.

For the first time in years, I felt whole. Like I had a purpose again, to take care of these innocent creatures. Most wouldn’t come close, but Goliath had become my friend. While I watched the sun set, Goliath would sprawl across my lap and would purr when I scratched his ears.

But of course, the new neighbors didn’t take so kindly to my new friends.

It was one family in particular, the Hubbards. The Hubbards had five boys between seven and fourteen. All of them were incredibly ill behaved. This was the same family that tried to claim that the lovely Hakim family was building bombs in their garage (their eldest daughter was actually building an automatic feeder for their dog) and that the reason that one house down the street wasn’t selling was because we had Alec and Derek living together ‘in sin’. The poor couple actually moved away from how awful the harassment got.

So when the wife Carla saw me with my cats, she threw a fit. She slammed her trash bin shut and marched over to my yard. The shyer cats ran off to the backyard, while Goliath sat content on my lap, unamused by this intruder.

“What is with all these cats?” She snapped.

Goliath just yawned and licked his paw.

I nervously smiled. “Good afternoon, Carla. These are just some strays I like to take care of. They’re harmless, maybe a bit fleabitten but they do no harm.”

Carla huffed and glared at Goliath. “That one looks like a wildcat, he could hurt my boys! And why are you wasting money feeding these… these strays, when you could have been donating to the church food drive?!”

To calm my nerves, I stroked Goliath’s ears. “Goliath won’t hurt a soul that won’t hurt him. And I did donate.”

“Well clearly you had some to spare.” Carla flipped her hair over her shoulder, looking down her nose at me. “My son already says the neighborhood calls you a witch. Stop attracting these diseased animals or I’ll be forced to call the police!”

Goliath tilted his ears back and hissed. Almost instantaneously, all the other cats turned and started to circle Carla, lurking, hair standing up their backs and growling. The scene was unnerving, to say the least. Carla backed away, growing pale, before she screamed, “Get away from me!” She kicked Kirk across the lawn before she dashed off.

The cats immediately gathered around Kirk, licking his face and purring to soothe him. I got up to check on him, nothing was hurt except for the neutered tom’s pride. I reassured them, the police wouldn’t do a thing about my babies, they weren’t destroying property or using the other yards as their toilet. They didn’t even meow loudly at night.

Well, they didn’t.

That night became an entire chorus of yowls. I looked out of my bedroom window to see a whole clutter of cats gathered in the Hubbard’s front yard. There had to be at least twenty five to thirty. In front was Goliath, I could make out his quivering hollers out of the rest.

The minute a light would go on inside the house, the cats would scatter, leaving none in sight. I think a few times I saw Carla’s husband John pitch something out of the window, probably a bottle considering the crash of glass, but as far as I could tell none made it close to a feline target.

Even though it was wrong, I giggled like a schoolgirl before shutting off the light and going to bed. I’d had cats in the past. I could sleep through it.

The next morning Carla was banging on my door, clearly exhausted after a night with no sleep. A paper was shoved in my face, I almost got bopped across the nose.

“Your neighbors aren’t happy with you, Doris.” Carla had the nerve to look smug. “We petition that you take care of your cat problem, stop feeding them, hire an animal control service, just do it!”

I took the petition and read down the list of names. There wasn’t as many as Carla would make me think- and the families that did sign up were her lackeys, the ones who kept their negativity to themselves until someone spoke up about it.

I sighed and lowered the petition. “Carla, it wasn’t anything I did that made the cats loud last night. They were in your yard, weren’t they?” My turn to look smug.

That knocked the wind out of Carla’s sails. She stammered for a second before snatching the petition out of my hands. “This is your last warning. If you don’t do something about these cats, I will!” With that, she stormed off, and would’ve looked awfully haughty… had not Goliath darted from the bushes and tripped her. Carla fell flat on her nose and Goliath ran up to me, rubbing himself against my ankles and purring before entering my house.

That was the first time Goliath entered my house, I’d never tried to take him in. But I was determined to keep him. A trim of his fur to get out the worst of the mats, a bath, and a collar later, Goliath looked like a real prince. A champion of his breed.

He seemed to have a goal in mind though. That goal was to drive the Hubbards insane. It was war and Goliath was the general.

The nightly choruses were lessened, just enough so that the neighbors couldn’t hear so well but completely obnoxious to the Hubbard household. The grass was going dead from cats pissing in the yard, along with piles of dirt from where they handled their business. Dead birds were strewn across their yard, and I heard Carla screaming about the fact a cat had taken an enormous poop right outside her door, ruining her heels.

Goliath got an extra pat on the back for that.

But the Hubbards weren’t going to play nice. Every day their boys would ride past my yard, yelling obscenities and chucking rocks at the cats. The slower ones would get struck and they would mew and cry out in pain. When blood was drawn Goliath would usher them inside and I’d care for them for the night.

It was a step too far when John put rat poison in his yard.

Duchess, poor Duchess. She’d mistakenly eaten half of the tuna can left in his yard, laced with the deadly ground up pellets. I found her barely alive on my porch.

All I could do was take her inside and make her comfortable.

All the cats came in, through the windows, through the cracked door, I think even some made it up from the basement. There was probably fifty cats, all sitting around me and Duchess as she was curled up on my lap, each breath growing lighter and lighter.

Goliath was the most distressed, pacing around, mewing, licking Duchess’ head every few seconds. I never knew a cat could love so much. When Duchess went lax and her breath came no more, he yowled so loudly I’m sure the whole town could hear it. A grieving cat, who lost his friend and love.

It was exhausting to dig the grave, but I had to do it for her. Duchess was nothing but sweet once I’d gotten her to come around. The cats stayed with me, mewing in distress and nudging at the small coffin I’d crafted for Duchess out of a box and some paints. She was a lady and she was going out in style.

Her body was lowered, the dirt covering the box, and I went to bed. Goliath slept with me that night, and I swore I would occasionally awake to hear him cry.

The next day I could barely get out of bed, but Goliath nudged me awake.

I had to take care of the others still, after all.

Carla was swearing and screaming at her car when I exited the house, and I could barely believe it. A single cat didn’t have much strength, but an army? Oh boy. The car was covered in cat pee and feces, the antenna chewed off, one of the windows was somehow broken and the seats were torn to hell.

She turned and saw me, foaming at the mouth in anger. “You!” She stormed over, her fists clenched. Goliath nudged me back and I hid behind the door, my throat dry.

“Y… yes?”

I’m sure the woman would have punched me if I hadn’t had the door between us. Instead, Carla started screaming. “That was my birthday present! I don’t know how you’re doing this, but this ends. Now!”

I took a deep breath and stood as tall and brave as a sixty eight year old woman can. “You killed one of them. Rat poison. You asked for it.”

“Like you’re going to miss that one! What is the matter with you?!”

I heard the chorus of hisses and growls from under my porch, Carla jumped out of her skin and shivered. She took a deep breath and glared.

“I swear, if it’s the last thing I do, I’m going to make sure each and every one of these cats ends up in the pound or as roadkill. And I mean it!”

With that awful, awful threat, she stormed off. I stumbled onto the porch and sat on my chair, too nervous to stand. “Oh, Goliath, what am I going to do?” I whispered.

Goliath licked my hand. His way of telling me it would be okay.

That evening I decided to stay out late. Watch the moon and the stars. The cats stayed with me rather than attack the Hubbards’ yard. The sun had just gone down when I heard the sound of children’s bikes.

It was the Hubbard boys, and they were armed with rocks again, the three youngest aiming at the cats who darted and dodged under the porch or into my backyard. I’m not sure if the oldest two were aiming for me or it was just an accident, but one rock smacked right next to my head… and the other cut open my forehead.

I cried out as pain exploded across my face and blood started to drip down my face.

Every cat stopped.

Goliath mewed and licked my face before he turned.

The growl he made wasn’t a typical cat’s sound.

It was like a demon from hell.

Goliath leaped from my lap and trotted closer to the boys, fur puffing out and continuing to growl. The rest of the cats ceased running and grouped up. Some of them I didn’t even see leaped down from the tree. I had to have over seventy cats in my yard. I didn’t even know so many had ever come to see me.

The eldest boy stopped his bike, the others falling in behind him. He pulled another rock from his bag. “Stupid cat!” He pitched his arm back…

And Goliath went for his throat.

I don’t really remember what happened. I think I blacked out. What I can remember is that Goliath grew… big. Even bigger than he already was. Even bigger than a lion. And the rest of the cats swarmed behind him, a hive mind of violence and with only one goal- kill.

When I woke up, it was past midnight.

There was no sign of the bikes. No boys. No army of cats, either. Just a few left, licking at a puddle in the street where the bikes had been abandoned.. It was a dry summer. There hadn’t been a puddle there earlier.

I stumbled back to my room, the bed cold and empty of my cat. I fell asleep in bed and dreamed of the ripping of wet flesh and the crunching of bones.

The next morning I woke up and there was Goliath, sleeping across the other pillow. He was fine, he wasn’t hurt. I tried to ignore the smell of blood in his breath as he nudged my face to get me up.

There was no sign of any bikes, or puddles. Just a normal plain street like the one I’d gotten used to living on.

There wasn’t many of the cats today, only four plus Goliath. These ones that weren’t present last night, either- Chip, Dill, Biscuit, and Bambi. Bambi had sprawled across my lap and was purring when the police cruiser pulled into my driveway.

Dill hid under the porch while Biscuit and Chip ran up to say hello.

Officer Holly Silva stepped out, with Carla in tow. Carla looked like she’d been crying, but when she saw me she smirked. I sighed and looked for Goliath but he was nowhere to be seen.

“Ma’am?” Holly held up her badge, even though she knew I recognized her. “I need to speak with you, please.”

Carla’s grin grew darker.

I invited Holly inside and we sat at the table together. Carla invited herself in and was standing in the corner, looking around my pristine house. “Thought it’d be more of a mess than this, given the animals you have,” She grumbled.

Holly ignored Carla before clearing her throat and looking at me. “Listen, Doris. Last night two of Carla’s sons came home shredded up and claiming you sicced your cats on them.” Holly took this moment to conspicuously look at Biscuit and Chip played with a ball of yarn, still quite kitten-y. “Her older three never returned home. Have you seen them?”

I reached up and touched my forehead. “I can’t really remember, last night I got my head bumped something awful.” I looked meaningfully at Carla, who sneered back. “It’s not anything serious, but no, I don’t remember where the boys went. I think they just rode past the house on their bikes, they were saying some quite nasty things, but that’s all I remember.”

Holly nodded and wrote that down. “Thank you, ma’am. That’s all I needed to know.”

“What?!” Carla looked ready to blow her top. “This isn’t close to all of the cats she had! My sweet Alexander said there had to be a hundred! Over a hundred!”

Holly snorted and her lips twitched. She somehow managed to remain professional. “Mrs. Hubbard, if Doris really owned over a hundred cats, I don’t think she’d be able to hide them this well in this two bedroom house.”

“Well… well…” Carla stammered before she looked around. “Where’s that big one? The awful one, the one that attacked my sweet son!”

Goliath. Oh no. Holly looked at me. “Is this all of them? I’m sorry, I have to ask.”

I looked around. “Well… Goliath should be here. Goliath? Come here, boy, no one’s gonna hurt you.”

“The officer is going to put him down the moment she sees that monster, don’t you try to pretend otherwise!” Carla’s eyes were full of murder, I was nearly about to start crying.

“Mew?”

I looked down.

There was a fluffy kitten, with black and orange fur and bright amber eyes. He jumped into my lap before hopping onto the table and sniffing Holly.

Holly examined his collar. “So, this is Goliath?” She couldn’t help it, she immediately started giggling. “The ironic naming style, I dig it. Hey, buddy, do you smell David? He’s my German Shepherd, he’d love to take care of a sweet lil thing like you…”

Carla was completely flabbergasted. She opened her mouth and shut it a few times before saying, “No, that… that’s not Goliath! Goliath is huge! He’s practically a mountain lion!”

“All right, Mrs. Hubbard.” Holly stood up and scratched Goliath behind the ears, who purred and teasingly batted at her hand. “That’s quite enough, I think your boys probably just are out playing somewhere. Let’s go now, you can help coordinate the search.”

I saw them out, Carla was fuming and now I was the one grinning. Carla turned to me and hissed, “This isn’t over. I will get the gun myself, and when the real Goliath shows up, I’m putting a bullet in his head.” With that nasty threat, she stormed back to her house.

I closed the door and turned around.

There was Goliath, sitting so proud, his normal self.

Nervous, I went to my knees. “G… Goliath? How… how did you do that?”

Goliath stepped forward and just batted at my hair. But I swear he smirked.

A few days ago the bones of a few adolescent boys were found. Picked clean. Carla didn’t even try to come over, the marks on the bones were larger than anything a cat could make. The word through the grapevine is that it’s probably someone’s escape pet lion. Adopted it as a baby and let it go when it was no longer cute.

But tonight, I’m holding a party. I invited most of my neighbors, I did my hair up all pretty like. I’m no longer going to estrange myself from my neighbors. Holly will be there, with her dog David. So will the Hakim family, the eldest girl is going to bring her boyfriend and his band. I’ll have to clear out the dining room to give them enough space but they’re fond of classic rock. Everyone’s responded enthusiastically.

Even my son Dylan’s going to come home, and bring his wife and twin children.

That should be enough noise to cover up Goliath and his army handling the Hubbards and their goons. In in the morning it’ll be either be interpreted as a mysterious vanishing or written off as another animal attack.

After all… how could a single cat maul a human being?

[mirkandmidnight]

hadestown thoughts

road to hell

i love road to hell and the idea of hermes as this meta narrator retelling the story over and over again. i thought this was a really good introduction to the characters, and was a hell of a bop.

living it up

also a bop

amber gray’s growly voice? fuck me up

“yOu think I  gIVe a dAmn???” me too

damon daunno is a really cute orpheus, i kind of love him? the interaction between him and persephone is great

i live for these cello instrumentations

all i’ve ever known

ah yes. eurydice.

i didn’t love anais mitchell as eurydice because there’s just this slightly petulant quality to her voice that bugs me

that said, nabiyah be’s voice is lovely. she gives eurydice this strength but at the same time there’s a sense of wistfulness you get from her

way down hadestown

mmmmmm yes

what a jam

i feel like this song hasn’t changed that much from the concept album and i am surprisingly okay with that

“everybody looked and everybody saw it was the same man they’d been singing about” “you’re early.” “i missed ya.” hahahahaha

patrick page’s voice rumbling along in the back is everything

epic ii

all i really have to say about this song is that damnon daunno’s falsetto is insanity

chant 

without a doubt one of my favorite songs in the show. the interplay between both couples, with the chant behind them, makes me want to start chopping up my furniture

polyphonic harmony to the max

nabiyah be has a really nice head voice too 

take a shot every time damon daunno does the “la la la” thing. you’ll die.

“did you think i’d be impressed with this neon necropolis???” fuck him up persephone

patrick page. the man. the myth. the legend.

hey little songbird

i mean it was fine? i think i prefer greg brown’s version of this tbh, not really sure why

“and they’re giving me...hell...back in hades” me too man

when the chips are down/gone, i’m gone

i adore the fates as this funky ruthless jazz trio. honestly the best conceptualization of them there will ever be.

the harmonies are so tight??? truly a jam

tbh gone, i’m gone is just kind of there? not really much to say about it

wait for me

YES

i loved this song on the concept album and i love it even more now

this version actually made me feel kind of bad for orpheus? like he’s a ditz but he cares

lol back in the day i thought “to the end of time” was as high as his falsetto was going to go. what a laugh.

damon daunnos’s belting is also insanity. i love him. god. also the continually building refrain is incredible? like they just keep adding harmonies and it’s the tightest shit ever

the thing this show does really really well is building the ensemble into all the group numbers

why we build the wall

love the intro to this song. it sounds like something you’d sing in a chain gang, which i guess is kind of the point. and that cello!!!

the call and response stuff is really neat

“AND THE WAR IS NEVER WON” ahhhhhhh

okay but also this ominous narration and building strings and cymbals and then amber gray: “Anybody want a drink?” all annoyed as the end of the first act makes me so happy you don’t even know

our lady of the underground

that cello line oh my god i got chills

have i mentioned that i love amber gray? because i fucking love amber gray

the growly voice

“i don’t know about you bOOOOYSSSSS”

the instrumental solos are really nice

i honestly spent the entire song imagining her as helene doing this and it was funny as hell

what a way to start act two

way down hadestown ii

hermes is back ladies and gents

this song kind of felt like a preview for chant ii which was fine

the fates spend a lot of time dragging hades for people who are so connected to him which, again, i’m fine with

“you sold your soul. you get your due. that is all we promised you.” CHILLS

the continued polyphony with the “way down hadestown” melody and the workers’ chant is so cool

oh no poor eurydice she’s so #shook

chant ii

this song is just plain good ominous fun.

that laugh omg

this is the song i love patrick page the most in like he’s such a dick but he’s just so much fucking fun

also this song feels like a salsa

chant ii basically takes all the melodies from the previous group numbers and layers them on top of each other in polyphonic insanity

persephone: tries to give eurydice advice, ends up talking about the time she and hades had sex in her mother’s garden

“women are so seasonal” pfft hades

the final section that’s just hades is so intense like it just keeps building and building  and building

“I CONDUCT THE ELECTRIC CITY”

the counting with the cello in the background??? mmmmmm?????

patrick page. jesus christ.

epic iii

you thought damon daunno’s falsetto couldn’t get any better? you were fucking wrong

homeboy starts in the stratosphere and just keeps getting higher

“the heart of a king loves everything like the hammer loves the nail” mmmmmm yesssss

i do like his lower range as well, though, when he uses it

so i really loved justin vernon as orpheus on the concept album, like the layering they did with his voice, but this is the song that made me go yeah, damon daunno all the way

“la la la la” here we go again

but the second section of the song is so much better tbh

“what has become of the heart of that man now that he has everything”

“see how he labors beneath that load/afraid to look up/afraid to let go” mmmmmm

“where is the man with his hat in his hands/who stands in the garden with nothing to lose” MMMM BOI

and the la la las come back in a meaningful way yeet

and like damon daunno actually makes me believe what hermes says about him, that he can make you see how the world could be instead of the way it is

word to the wise

yes the fates are back

these harmonies are so tight

“heres a little snippet of advice: men are fools. men are frail. give them the rope and they’ll hang themselves”

his kiss/the riot

patrick page. yes.

the instrumentals on this are really nice tbh

lol who doesn’t love a good creepy accordion

i mean it’s fine as a song, but that’s all? there’s nothing wrong with it, i just don’t really love it

promises

i like this song for the fact that it’s one of the few times that we see orpheus and eurydice interact, and it’s this really sweet moment

but also really bittersweet because we know what’s coming and they don’t

see here we actually get damon daunno’s lower range and it’s legitimately gorgeous

wait for me ii

hermes has this great almost defeated narration at the beginning

hades and persephone are going to try again yeet

“wait for me?” “i will” the sound of my heart exploding

this song has such a “let’s get moving” vibe

i have to say it again: damon daunno has pipes

doubt comes in 

ahhhhhhhh i’m not ready

such an ominous intro

the fates as the narrators of this song gives me a really weird vibe and i don’t know how i feel about it

like they have this really intense tambor to their voices

goddammit orpheus you had one job

road to hell ii

well of the characters in this show hermes is not the one i was expecting to get fucked up about

noooooooooo hermes

“it’s an old song/and we’re gonna sing it again and again” AHHHHHHHH

the choice not to have any accompaniment for the beginning of this song is really interesting and really fitting

“to know how it ends and still to begin, as if it might turn out this time”

when the ensemble comes in i tear up every time

“he could make you feel how the world could be instead of the way it is”

the actor playing hermes really fucking sells this song okay and i’m not okay

and now i’m crying in the library again

[justjessame]

Takes One To Know One Chapter 13

I woke up groggy and disoriented in the dark of my room.  Why I woke up wasn’t immediately apparent, but something woke me.  I lay curled on my side, trying to force my senses to work together to get me up to speed.  I’d come to my rooms, turned on the walkie, which was silent as a tomb still - so that wasn’t the source of my semi-alertness, and tucked myself into my bed.  I was warm, a little warmer than usual actually, and when had I moved the pillow -

“HEY!” I kicked my leg back, connecting with a kneecap and pulling away from the arms that had been wrapped around me as if I were some kind of fucking teddy bear.  I heard his groan and smirked, but then my eyes went wide.  “How the fuck did you get in here?”  I rolled over, knowing exactly who was grabbing for his wounded knee in the dark as he grumbled about insane midget women and their kick happy asses.  

“You left the door unlocked,” Negan muttered, blinking against the light of the lamp I turned on the side of the bed I was on.  “Did you have to kneecap me?”  

“Who invited you to my bed?”  I asked, propping myself up against the headboard and looking down at the man who’d cost me TWO nights’ worth of sleep.  “You’re lucky I kicked your knee and not your balls.”  

“Aw, Megan, if you kicked me in the balls,” his voice had gone an octave lower and I cursed the fluttering it caused in my stomach.  “Then you’d ruin my plans for later.”

I shook my head as my stomach growled.  “I hope your plans include dinner, Negan.”  His lips curled in a smile and I had to take a beat to appreciate how much it changed his features.  Softened him, made him look almost -  No, not now, Satan.  “I’m starving.”  I started to get up, but his hand landed on my arm and I stopped moving.  

“Come here, just for a sec,” I rolled over, shifting so my head was on my pillow and we were facing one another.  “Is it really so bad that I was in your bed when you woke up?”  

His fingers were brushing my hair from my face, and I considered what bothered me most about waking up with anyone in my bed.  “I don’t like waking up to someone I didn’t invite inside, Negan.”  He nodded, his thumb ghosting my lower lip.  “It spooked me more because it was dark, you’re hot as a furnace, and I didn’t remember leaving the door unlocked.”  

“If I’d woken you up, even though you looked absolutely peaceful sleeping, would you have let me stay?”  I didn’t say anything, but he didn’t really wait for an answer, his face closing in on mine and then our lips met and unlike the hunger that hit after John’s demise, or the goodnight kiss that seemed to hit us both like a freight train, this one was slow and easy.  We took our time and we tempted one another.  When he pulled away, our eyes were searching for one another’s and I guessed he saw his answer, even if I wasn’t entirely sure of it myself.  “Let’s go get something to eat.  Then bedtime, Megan.”  The way he said it made me wonder if he meant sleep, or just time for bed?

Dinner wasn’t tense, even if a part of me felt like it should have been.  Negan sat across from me and watched as the younger members of our community came to show me their progress in what they were learning, or to tell me what was going on in their tiny worlds.  He listened and studied my interactions with the adults who came by to run ideas past me, seeing what decisions I made on my own versus which ones I sent to the committee.  I squinted as I realized that there were two among the crowd that I expected to see and hear from that hadn’t made themselves known.

“Looking for Max and Greg?”  My eyes met his across the table and he smirked.  “Told you they’d end up back in the general population.”  He nodded his head toward a table in the corner that was tucked a little further out of my sightline.  “Seems they found a few girls to fill their days with.”  He was correct, there were my former advisors, and they were quite affectionate with a few of our eligible women.  

I shrugged.  “One less thing,” I shook my head, “TWO less things to worry about.”  Although, seeing the two of them reminded me of my chat with Michael.  “I spoke with a former advisor.”  Negan nodded for me to go on as he ate.  “He’s on the council, or committee, depending on which of our people you talk to.  He wants to work up a ‘worst case scenario’ plan and he thinks you might be an asset to it.”  He didn’t say anything, just listened so I continued.  “Michael thinks that, while I plan on staying firmly out of every other group’s issues, that one day those issues are going to land on our doorstep.”  Negan’s eyes tightened slightly and I figured he understood and agreed.  “He thinks that your expertise would come in handy to not only make the plan, but present it to the committee.”  

“You can’t just implement it?”  I shook my head.  “Big decisions, ones that truly impact the entire group you want them to have a say in?”  A nod.  “The only issue with that, Megan, is that even if you don’t order it, your ass is still the one on the line for it.  When push comes to shove, it’s your ass, or neck that takes the hit, not the group’s.”  

I understood he was speaking from experience.  “I know, but this isn’t something I want to budge on.  I plan on sticking to the idea that we're Switzerland, we’ll give aid, but won’t fight.”  I wouldn’t lose lives for someone else’s war.  He nodded, thinking.

“OK, I’ll do whatever you ask me to.  If working with Michael was it?”  I smiled and nodded.  “Then I’ll work with Michael on a plan.”  

Negan walked me back to my rooms and then he came inside with me.  I had options, I knew that as well as I knew that I knew my own name, but honestly - I wanted him.  

He took the time to turn the lock on my door and then he was back in front of me.  “Bedtime, Megan.”  

Jesus, how the hell did his voice do that - drop low enough to make me want to glance down to make sure my pants didn’t follow?  He was biting his lower lip and damned if I didn’t want to do it for him, but before I could tell him that, he scooped me into his arms and started for my bedroom, forcing a noise from me that I’m not sure I’d ever made.

“What are you doing?”  I laughed, thinking he was taking the romance a touch too far, but he leaned in, letting his nose slide along my jaw and the urge to chuckle stopped along with my ability to breathe easily.  

“Getting you to bed faster,” seriously, dark and low, and hot his voice and breath were dark, low, and HOT.  “I don’t mind keeping pace with you any fucking time, Megan, but right now-”  No arguments there, I thought, eyes closing at the knowledge that he’d gotten us right where we both clearly wanted to be in record time.  

When Negan put me down, it wasn’t on my feet by the bed, instead he’d put me ON the bed.  I made quick work of my boots, not wanting to get dirt on the sheets and ruin a good time, and then I was on my knees, helping him get rid of his layers.  “Seem a little impatient, Megan.”  He didn’t sound as smug or mocking, and I bit my lip when I heard him swallow hard.  Jacket, shirts, bare skin finally, and I was leaning forward to press my face against his neck to breathe him in.  The scent of him, our soap, and the slight musk of Negan underneath had my smile curving against his skin.  My fingers were busy at his waist, unfastening his pants, opening his final barriers to  my touch even as he suddenly realized he’d been rendered statue-like by my momentum.  

“You have some catching up to do, Negan,” I reminded him, as his fingers worked to bare my body to his own touch.  While he worked, I tasted his neck, feasted on his chest, and worked down to free him from those pesky pants of his.  

It wasn’t graceful, our full disrobing, with him nearly falling over as he kicked his boots and pants free from his feet or when I got tangled in my shirts and hair, but laughter always goes hand in hand with good sex.  Or it did this time, because as soon as Negan was chuckling and on top of me, I was laughing and wrapping my arms around him, and it felt right.  And then he slid inside of me, and it felt fucking amazing.  

Negan held me as we drifted to sleep, I was too tired to enforce my rule of always sleeping alone, I told myself.  My head tucked under his chin, his heart beating a steady rhythm that lulled me into a dreamless sleep, and his warmth and strength keeping me rested all night.

[just-another-human-mind]

~Unexpected~

1.8k words, fluff mix?

Protector!Dan & Clumsy!Phil

Warning: there is a bit of cussing and lowkey bullying but it’s nothing really 

Summary: an AU in which Dan and Phil are polar opposites. Phil is Dan’s lowkey stalker and would do anything to learn more about the lonely boy who lives next door. During summer he decided to finally try getting closer, but when his plans actually worked he didn’t expect to fall for him more than he already had. With Dan being the cold person he was on the outside, seeing his gentle side only makes Phil’s life harder than it was because he can’t seem to get Dan to notice him!

{chap. 2}

Chap.1

“Dan…Daaan…Dan…Daniel wake up”, Phil whined continuously shaking the boy in his sleep. “Fuck off”, Dan groaned pulling his blanket over his head hoping the other would leave him be. However, Phil wasn’t giving up, “You promised”, his voice pitched higher. “Ugh”, Dan fussed, but Phil continued to pull at his sheets. Eventually he succumbed to the weak protest and lifted his head from the stuffy sheets keeping his eyes closed. “...what is it?”, he yawned. Impatiently waiting for the other to speak, but can only hear rigid breathing coming from below. This raised a bit of concern, Dan shifted himself up to sit. Adjusting his eye’s to a flash of light coming from the wooden floor to the left of him. ‘A phone?’, he questioned. Then looked over to his side and saw the pale boy with tears flooding his blue eyes kneeling beside his bed. He looked as though he was trying to form words, but failed. Dan froze, he felt so confused. Why was he crying was he too mean? What just happened? His mind became filled with bizarre reasons until Phil finally broke the silence. “I saw...I t-thought I saw him or something s-standing by the d-door! G-glowing eyes and e-every-thing”, Phil’s voice kept getting interrupted by the soreness in his throat which forcefully held back tears. He continued on mumbling faint inaudible words, but all Dan can process at that moment was having a possible stalker or demon watching him sleep late at night in which Phil happened to have caught it. He was stunned to say the least, but as his mind started to fully awake, it hit him. He recalled Phil saying he wasn’t scared of horror films after being questioned by Dan’s suspicion at 11pm and even picked out his “favorite” so they both can watch, but here he was 3 hours after he had went to sleep, sitting here looking at Phil being a paranoid mess because of the the movie. He had no word’s. Did Phil lie? Why? Dan decided to let it go so he rested his hand in Phils messy head of hair and started to play with his fringe. The apathetic boy didn’t know why he was doing this, he wanted to stay away, but it was better than just watching the pale boy suffer for no reason, he wanted to protect him, ‘Why is he different?’, the boy sighed at his thought and continued to pet the dork back to his calm self. It worked, he somehow slowed down Phil’s breathing, both taking in the musky aroma that surrounded them. ‘Rare’, Phil thought, but enjoyed the delicate affection he was receiving. 

*2 weeks earlier*

It was summer and Phil had set a goal for himself to spend a night over at Dan’s despite the many rude remarks made by him whenever they crossed paths. Phil always tried to get close to the mysterious hazel eyed boy who happened to live next door. From his window, he would frequently spy on Dan, both of their rooms were right across from each other and if he was lucky, Dan would sometimes open his curtains and crack the window open for fresh air giving Phil acsess to quickly analyze his room (in a non-stalkerish way). They both had similar interests in music and video games, but Phil was never able to actually connect with Dan, since he would never even be allowed in the first place. To Phil, Dan was like a cat, he would never communicate with others and you would never be able to see him, he is quick and being the number one cross country runner in the town made him drift further away from society. It was like he ran his feelings out of him. If so, how much does Dan have bottled up inside himself to the point where he can surpass the rest without difficulty? Phil wondered all kinds of things about Dan, but to his disappointment it would only make him feel further apart. Little did he know that was going to change exponentially.

A few weeks after summer break had started, Phil's family had left town to visit family in the north leaving him behind to attend his summer math class. The next morning as Phil was walking to school he spotted Adam and his friends huddled and hovering over each other to watch something on a phone. ‘Shit’, Phil thought and swiftly sped up hoping he doesn’t get spotted. But of course, he managed to trip on a hole in a crack on the sidewalk as he was about to turn the corner and fell face forward. ‘I hate myself’ Phil thought and suddenly felt two big hands pull on the back of his jacket, bringing him to his knees. “Well what do we have over here!”, Adam exclaimed. His friend, Greg followed along by laughing at Phil's unfortunate fall and started to play around with his backpack, “Well shit, looks like the little faggs joining us for summer school this year!”, Greg continued to investigate the bag but found nothing interesting so he ended up throwing it back to him. Phil tried to shove Adams strong grip off him so he can get up and get out of here, but that only caused Adam to tighten his grip. The group of guys all laughed at the weak attempt and started to call Phil a bunch of meaningless names. Adam hushed them all and leaned in closer to Phil, “You can’t leave just yet”, Adam hummed, sounding almost menacing causing shivers to go down Phil’s spine. “I want something from you and we cannot disagree Lester, because if we do i’ll make you wish you hadn’t, his voice sung those lines mischievously and Phil wanted no part of it, but felt beyond intimidated. Adam is not the most popular guy in school, but he is the strongest and him being 6”5 doesn’t help. Phil is pretty tall himself, but he doesn’t have muscular abs nor does he have enough confidence to stick up for himself against a bad boy like Adam so, he shamelessly agreed. “What is it you want from me?”, Phil could almost swear he saw stars in Adam's eyes as he grinned. “The wolf has caught his prey”, one of the other guys in the group mumbled to himself, but loud enough for all to here. “Well… I want you to strip for me at my party next week in front of everybody”, Adam said without a hint of hesitance. ‘What? Is he actually being serious right now’, Phil looked stunned. What was he supposed to say exactly? It’s not something people would actually agree to. So he just sat there with pure confusion until Greg pushed his forehead as if to bring him back to reality. “Hey-hey-hey no fantasizing just yet, Adam you can’t be serious right now that’s insane nobody want to see him let alone strip!”, Greg kept complaining, but Adam held his stare, “Well. Do you know what you’ll be wearing? I can see that you’re thinking about it already”, Adam was full on smirking. “Why! Why would you want me to do something like that and why would you even think i’d actually agree to something this stupid! Phil wanted to leave, he was going to be late and wanted to forget every word that came out of that assholes mouth so he tried to get up. “Ah-ah-ah no Lester you can’t say no you already agreed, remember?”. “You really can’t make me”, Phil spat. Just as Adam yanked his arm and pushed his back against the fence Phil immediately kneed him in the nuts. “Fuck!”, Adam groaned deeply and hunched over, the men around him started yelling at Phil and tried to catch him, but ultimately failed because of how inhumanly fast he was running. The running didn’t last very long and Phil immediately fell to his knees in exhaustion. Luckily, the school was only two streets down and Phil had that tiny bit of strength left in him to walk it off. 

He made it in and wasn’t late to his first day of class, ‘it’s a miracle’, Phil thought to himself as he dragged his sore legs into the classroom. There were a few empty seats and the one’s in the front were filled with classmates he hated, because, one, they were never friendly with him and two, they were just annoying in general. All the girls would act fake towards each other and would practically throw themselves at the guys. He felt so out of place, so different that he’d rather risk his chances of not being able to understand the teacher during the lectures that he just went all the way to the back corner and chose a seat by the window. The universe must’ve had a grudge on Phil, because Adam and Greg walked in six minutes after Phil and immediately spotted him. He was scared and left frozen like a deer in headlights as Greg pointed at him and said something to Adam. He should have left, he should have just quit summerschool right there, but he couldn’t because if he didn’t pass this class he would be forced to stay another term next year instead of graduating. They walked towards him and with every step they took Phil sunk deeper and deeper into his seat. Greg pulled him back up with hands gripping the back of his shirt collar making Phil squeak. “I'm sorry Adam! I-I didn’t mean t-to h-hurt you like that I was sc-scared”, Phil sheepishly admitted with his hands in the air. His heart was beating ultra fast, he felt as though it was going to get ripped out any moment by Adam, but thankfully he was saved. The teacher walked in and told everybody to settle down and go to their seats. The two guys ended up taking the empty seats surrounding Phil, Adam to Phil's left, Greg to Adams, and sat silent for the rest of the period. Phil was worried if Adam was plotting his death and kept looking to his side only to keep seeing emerald eyes staring back at him. He couldn’t read the expression on his face, it was almost blank and made him feel uncomfortable. The bell rang and Phil tried to leave as fast as he could with the rest, but for some reason Adam didn’t go after him and beat him to death. Instead he just watched Phil squeeze his way out of there like a freaked out baby mouse and giggled, nobody noticed. Hungry and feeling emotionally drained as well as physically, Phil decided to skip eating out today and instead go home, have his crunchy nut cereal and take a long nap, because summer school was going to be a long ride and he knew it.

{ next chapter }

**notes**

Okay wow is this all over the place? Please let me know as i'm still new to this and hopefully it was readable! lol thank you for taking the time to read ❤ i have so many idea’s for this and i hope you’re excited to see how the story progresses and if you have any suggestions i'm open to reading them! thank you again ❤