#Goodbye TTS it was fun. I'm sorry it was so short

[shima-draws]

You’ve been hit by!! You’ve been struck by!! HYPERFIXATION

[harleyaquin]

Catholic Comfort

So, after waking up this morning I was browsing YT shorts - no, I don't have TikTok, I don't want TT, I have a rule in life that the most important thing you can do for yourself is 'know yourself'. I know myself well enough to know that while I struggle to create the habits and routines I *want*, I almost immediately set in stone the ones I had zero will or intention to make, and that would almost without doubt apply to TT. So I simply don't allow access to it lol. Anyway, a video about two sisters came up on my feed, one had taken her Vows and became a Catholic Nun. It was talking about the judgements people often make about a life within a Covenant. The sister who is not a Nun was speaking about what she observed her sisters life to be, within the order etc.

I was a little confused, I don't engage much with religion so I wasn't sure how the alogo-overlords connected me to this particular video. Clicking on the channel, I saw the young woman is something of a religious trad-wife.

For me the whole point of 'feminism' is not 'to only promote working mothers who are independent, high earners' but more that 'every person regardless of their gender, age, and socioeconomic, race, or other characteristic should have a choice on the life that they want and be supported in order to pursue and achieve that choice. If someone wants to be a stay at home parent, they should be able to do that. But equally if they wish to work, they should have support for that too. Additionally, and this is a much broader, nuanced conversation that I am not trying to get into in its entirety right now, I feel like life sometimes takes an unexpected turn. Whether a person in this moment believes that they currently want and will always want to be the stay and home spouse, this does not preclude the individual from falling victim to unexpected changes and them themselves changing their minds. I believe strongly it is wise to ensure all are educated in academic and life skills to a point where they can live independently and know how to enter the work force. If the working spouse suddenly passes away, the stay-at-home spouse may suddenly find themselves not only grieving, a single parent, but also having never been in the work force with no clue how to take that step. That's an overwhelming prospect to figure out while coming to terms with such a monumental loss. But, so anyway, all of this is to say that I don't understand why people make fun of Trad-Wives. Surely the point is CHOICE?

I got a little off my main point there, sorry - So, one of the YT shorts was talking about Catholicism being alive and well - which, I wasn't aware anyone was questioning, but okay. Suddenly, and super unexpectedly, I'm crying.

What. The. .... I dunno man.

I wasn't diagnosed as neurodivergent until my late twenties. But in hindsight, there's a lot of 'performance' in catholic worship, and I don't mean that in a negative, diminishing or insulting way. I recall my time at church with warmth, fondness, safety and community.

But for a kid who struggled with social nuance and interactions, going to a place every Sunday where the people were 'safe', there were 'costumes' (Sunday church clothes), 'actors' (our Father stood outside greeted us, and said goodbye to each of us at the end, while there were variations, it was a relatively known interaction. A stage (the alter, and where the Father spoke from, with a microphone.) with musicians (the band for the songs), with songs and scripts (hymns, and responses that were expected. Like 'The Lord be with you' and we respond 'and with your spirit' or 'and also with you'

I found comfort in that, while I had questions about higher powers and organised religion itself, I think maybe that's why I cried but I'm not sure and I would really love anyone else's thoughts here honestly.

[calxide]

⋆⁺ [ 040 ] nothing to be scared of if i'm with you

warning/s: food, not proofread | w/c: 0.4k – you can read the text utc if you're having a hard time reading the pictures! (also yn refused to get picked up by scaramouche, don't be confused) nii-san means big brother in japanese.

ABYSSAL LOVE ✰ previous ♡ masterlist ♡ next

a/n: sorry for the vv short update! next chapter might be a bit lengthy,, i basically cut this chapter in to two :')

⋆⁺ synopsis — Scaramouche, the person who tripped you on purpose just to see your despair expression on your face, hates how you always appear so happy in front of other people. He hated the fact that you find life enjoyable, unlike him. You, of course, hated him back. You don't understand why he goes to the extent to see your face crinkle in pure dismay. But what if you realize that the person who always laughs at your misery isn't so insufferable after you get to know him?

You quickly got off your car. You were late for almost half an hour already, and you bet that Scaramouche might be getting impatient by now. You sighed as you clutched your things to your chest and ran towards the park's entrance. 

You quickly scanned the area, trying to find Scaramouche. It was a pretty large park, filled with children playing around and various other people walking around aimlessly. The trees surrounding the park had their leaves falling like snowfall from the branches above, causing everything in its way to being covered. 

Cheers and voices of multiple children made their way to your ears. They sounded like they were having fun, and you couldn't help but smile a little at that. A certain voice stood out from the crowd, it was familiar, but its tone was unknown to your ears. There was no mistaking it; it belonged to Scaramouche. 

He was standing amongst the group of three children. Their faces looked happy, and their laughter sounded genuine, which caused you to feel relief. Scaramouche could not have been angry, and he most definitely wasn't going to throw them into the nearest river. You never expected that he was fond of children. 

Scaramouche had this big smile; he was laughing along with the children. He ruffled one of the kids' hair, and you heard him tell them to finish eating their ice cream before proceeding to play again. You approached them with a smile forming on your lips. 

"Nii-san! Is she your girlfriend?" One of the kids asked.

A blush crept into Scaramouche's face almost immediately. You softly chuckled as you patted their head, "Hehe. Did Scaramouche nii-san buy you all ice cream?"

They all nodded cheerfully, "Mhm! He also played with us while waiting for his girlfriend, you!" You smiled.

You heard Scaramouche clear his throat. "Alright. Y/N, let's go?"

"Bye, kids!" The children also bid goodbye to the two of you.

"Fufufu, I didn't know you were good with children." Scaramouche rolled his eyes at you, and you gave him a peck as revenge for doing so.

Your hand intertwines with Scaramouche's. Your hand fits almost perfectly with his; it was endearing. His hold was warm, and you felt comfortable.

"So, why did miss clingy want to go out all of a sudden?"

You nudged him by the shoulder and narrowed your eyes on him, "Oh, shut it."

You opened your bag and took out an envelope. You handed it to Scaramouche, and he only stared at you in confusion. "What's this?"

"Hm... you can open it later once you're home. But for now, let's go with our date!"

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