#God what the hell can I even do for my birthday because I literally can't drink alcohol or eat cake because of my health problems

[magpies4nights]

Tomorrow is my birthday (And I’m not joking around) (Dev log #11)

Well, the title isn't lying. Tomorrow is the day I turn the legal drinking age in the US, and the age I'm probably considered too old for Leonardo DiCaprio. I'm not sad about that though, I don't think he aged very well. I'm probably going to celebrate it on Friday though, because I'm not celebrating it alone, moooostly because the friends I'm the closest to are turning 20 this year and the ones that are older than me do not drink because they have trauma from their families. So I guess it's just me and my parents. Tomorrow though I'm going to a shopping center with my bestie. No drinking involved though (or eating cake), apparently I'm currently experiencing health problems.

I think I'm getting withdrawal symptoms from not eating sugar.

Well, I at last finished the last location of the game, and started working on everyone’s sprites like I promised 2 weeks ago. The base sprites for the cashier are done, so now Xandra isn’t staring into the empty scenes alone anymore, although I would imagine them not being too fond of each other, but the Cashier is one of the more forgiving towards her than everyone else who is forced to come along with her (Party Person being the other one).

Anyways, since there is no more music to show you because I reached the number of songs I wanted, I think I’ll just draw scenes from movies and games I’d want to reference, lol. I was thinking of removing this entire section because it's redundant and it's me showing my master's in yapping about my favorite things that's not GASA4AM related because, well, yeah, but I put too much effort in the drawing below so I'm not doing that. And first contender….. Jawbreaker (1999). Now, if you’re under 18, I don’t recommend watching this movie. I have been debating this, mostly because the movie is… contemporary but there is one explicit scene (and it made me very uncomfortable, especially considering why it happened). And there also is at least two that show a (fake) dead body, where they find out the person is dead, and then "dispose" it by manhandling it and making the cops think that she died in... another way, but it looks very disturbing because there is a (fake) jawbreaker stuck in her throat. (I watched the behind the scenes and the girl who played Liz Purr was very much alive when she was playing the character’s corpse, and the jawbreaker was makeup). Buuuut, Kyu is literally named after Kyu Sugardust from the Huniepop series (very explicit game series, I also don't recommend playing that game if you're under 18), and I’m probably just going to reference the beginning and the end of the movie, as in the lines spoken in this movie and not at all what the characters wear and do (nobody is going to manhandle corpses or die from a jawbreaker stuck in their throats. Also no 17th birthdays because I don't even think the GASA4 cast has any birthdays for that matter).

Anyways, SPOILER ALERT!!!!! (stuff is below the line)

Here is what I'm referencing:

[heeliumhaze-elle]

close friends

「synopsis」 — after running into her extremely toxic ex at jake's birthday party last year, y/n seemed to disappear off the face of the planet. the only traces of her were her instagram story posts during her month-long trip to the states at the start of the new year. but other than that, no one had seen or heard from her since that night in november. the boys have speculated that it was because of the run-in with k all those months ago; however, when something y/n posts on her 'close friends' story begins to circulate through their group, they grow increasingly suspicious and angry over their speculations. ... except something about all of this doesn't sit right with heeseung. 「warnings」 — mc suffers from depression & struggles with thoughts of suicide, the boys are kinda petty assholes imo, cursing. please dm me if i missed anything! 「word count」 — 4923 words 「author's note」 — lowercase intended. only slightly proofread. no real plot, rushed ending - like seriously i didn't know how to end it so i just did... this is my first story, so i'm really nervous, lol. this is all fictional. the way the idols are portrayed in this story does not reflect how i view them by any means. 「dedication」 — this story is dedicated to my friend ani - may you always remember that you are never alone, not anymore.

"can you fucking believe her?" asked sunghoon, staring at the screenshot on jungwon's phone.

jake and jay agreed, peering over sunghoon's shoulder to get a better look at the photo. sunoo, who sat opposite the 02z, let out a tired sigh while ni-ki, who sat on the tabletop between jake and sunoo, massaged his temples. meanwhile, jungwon looked at his hyungs uneasily. heeseung wondered if he regretted asking if y/n was okay.

heeseung kept his gaze fixed on his friends as they continued to skim through the now-infamous screenshot.

"literally though, like what the fuck are we then?" ni-ki asked. "how dare she."

"god, no! and then to re-add us to her 'close friends' as if nothing happened," jay added. "like jungwon wouldn't have said anything to us."

"right?" sunoo said, rolling his eyes as he read through the post. "as if he wasn't going to tell us! like hello? he's our best friend!"

"it's like it was about us," jake said. "i'm not here to play these games. if she has a fucking problem with us, she needs to just fucking say so. we're not in high school anymore!"

"... well, except ni-ki," muttered sunoo.

jungwon let out a nervous sigh. "guys, i didn't mean to start anything-."

"no!" jay interrupted. "jake's right. we're all old enough. she needs to use her fucking words. she has a problem with us, just fucking say so. don't fucking act like we're all 'good' when it's clearly about us."

"because what the hell did we ever do to her?" sunghoon demanded.

all the while, jungwon's phone was making its rounds to each of the boys. and soon, the phone was in heeseung's hands. he was finally able to read the screenshot that started this entire uproar.

... and he was gutted.

"my sleep schedule is so fucked as of lately. all i do is lay in bed for 85-90% of my day. i can't keep pretending i'm jet-lagged from my trip to the states. i desperately crave to get out of the house to do things with other people, but i literally have no friends here — outside the ones that i made at work. even when i try to do things on my own, it's just so mentally taxing that i end up sleeping for 24+ hours after attempting to make myself feel better. it's a lot, i guess.

"... if i wasn't so afraid of death and dying, then maybe-."

heeseung felt his heart drop. he forced himself to stop reading; he couldn't continue, knowing that's where y/n's mind went.

how long had y/n been feeling this way? was there truth in what the other boys were saying? was this post about them?

shaking his head, heeseung refocused his attention on his friends. they all sat around him, angered by the post that y/n had made just the day before. the only person - save for himself - who wasn't mad about what y/n posted was jungwon. but heeseung couldn't tell if that was because he was still able to view her close friends story on instagram or if jungwon was genuinely worried about y/n.

even if the post was about them, heeseung told himself that that was the least of their concerns. the only thing that mattered to him (and he was surprised that his friends didn't seem to think similarly on the subject) was how y/n felt.

as the others went on to bash y/n for posting that and not being upfront with them about her feelings, heeseung handed jungwon back his phone.

"like honestly, i thought we were friends. what is her problem?" sunghoon circled back.

heeseung stood from his seat at the park table, white-knuckled fists suddenly clenched at his side. he startled the others with how abruptly he got up, but he didn't seem to care. "are you all fucking hearing yourself right now?"

"did you not just see what she posted yesterday?" jay asked.

ni-ki looked up at his hyung and added, "and she's so messy for re-adding us to her close friends list. if it wasn't for jungwon hyung, we wouldn't have ever seen this. so i bet she thinks she got away with talking shit about us like that."

"that's exactly what she was thinking!" jake chimed in.

heeseung didn't stay to hear what his insensitive friends had to say next. he simply told the five of them to "fuck off" and bid jungwon goodbye before storming off from the scene. as he neared his car, he reached for his phone from his back pocket; he wanted to text y/n. he needed to! however, upon closer inspection, he realized that his phone was out of battery. and of course, today was the day his car's charging cable broke!

groaning to himself, heeseung let himself into his vehicle and just drove. with his phone dead, there was no way for him to reach y/n to give her the heads-up that he'd be arriving anytime soon... but he also figured - given what he had read only minutes and minutes ago - that she would be home regardless.

his thoughts drifted back to y/n. he kept wondering how long she had been feeling that way. he wondered if she felt lonely because while she was locked away in her apartment, the rest of them were still going to each other's houses and planning group excursions... excursions, heeseung came to realize, that y/n wasn't invited to.

fuck! he thought as he came to a red light. if that post truly was about him and the rest of the guys, was it not deserved? he thought back to all the times that they went out without inviting y/n and he wondered if her fomo eventually got so bad she thought that they had silently kicked her out of the friend group. no... there's no way she thought that! right? y/n had a lot more sense than to think that a few outings without her meant that they no longer wanted to be her friend. right?!

the light stayed red as heeseung's mind swirled with several different thoughts. there was more to the post. heeseung knew that. granted, he didn't read it as thoroughly as his friends had, but he had skimmed through it quickly enough. the others were so hung up on the fact that y/n said she didn't have any friends; heeseung also guessed they were angry over the little bits of text that followed her dark thoughts. but... was she wrong to say all those things? the other seemed to think so. so much so that they completely ignored the blatant cry for help that was the entirety of y/n's post.

when the light finally turned green, heeseung couldn't stop thinking about the first line of the last paragraph. "...if i wasn't so afraid of death and dying, then maybe all of this would be so much easier."

in the three years that heeseung had gotten to know y/n, he had to admit that he was very aware of how dangerously dark her thoughts could be. there were moments when he wouldn't hear from her for weeks at a time. he remembered how y/n would lament on the droves of friends she had lost in the years prior because they hated when she would fall into her slump. after all, she wouldn't text anyone for days at a time; he recalled how when she recalled those memories, it somehow always ended with the friends telling her that she was selfish or that she wasn't trying hard enough to get better.

heeseung quickly parked his car in the guest space of y/n's apartment complex. from his spot, he could see the curtains of her bedroom window weren't drawn, but the window was cracked opened ever-so-slightly. he found himself devising a plan b in case y/n didn't come to the door and it involved somehow shimmying up to the second floor and busting through her window.

without another moment to lose, he rapidly bashed his pointer finger against the doorbell. at least if she was sleeping, he was certain that this'd wake her up!

not even a minute had gone by when y/n flung her apartment door open. heeseung took in the sight of her. her hair, a tangled, matted mess. if he had to guess, he assumed her knots were much worse at the back of her head. he noted that the fullness of her cheeks had vanished. she looked so gaunt compared to the last time he saw her; he wondered when the last time she ate was... or at least when the last time she ate anything of sustenance was.

y/n looked at heeseung with tired eyes. she frowned for a moment, only to replace it with a sad smile.

"have you come to air your grievances with me in person?" she said in a strained whisper.

if heeseung had been gutted before, he had no idea what this new feeling was. whatever it was though, it shattered whatever was left of him. he had known y/n to have horrible episodes of hopelessness and defeat, but this was too much for him to bear. he couldn't even begin to imagine how she was feeling. she was a shell of herself.

"... what are you talking about?" he asked gently.

"i just thought..." y/n let out a deep, long sigh. she looked down at her hello kitty house slippers, not finishing her thought aloud. she tightly wrapped her arms around herself as she stroked her right upper arm slowly.

instinctively, heeseung removed his coat and draped it over y/n. her bloodshot, tired eyes looked up at him once more. he wanted to hold her. to make her feel his warmth. to make her feel his love. he just wanted her to see she wasn't alone anymore.

"you just thought what?" he asked as y/n ushered him inside.

she shut the door behind her and wordlessly led him to the small couch in her living room. heeseung saw the nest she had created for herself with her blankets, pillows, and plushies in the dark space. the only source of light came from her muted television, which was currently airing reruns of old cartoons from the 1990s and the early 2000s. there were torn-up bags of chips (some empty and some half-full), unfinished, open bottles of soju and cans of beer, and a plethora of takeout boxes scattered around her little nest across her tiny coffee table. trash and dirty laundry lined the floor around her couch.

"sorry about the mess. i haven't had visitors in over six months now..."

six months. the last time anyone had seen y/n had been over seven months ago. sure, they had seen her posting all about her trip back to the states a month ago, but no one had physically been in her presence in over half a year. heeseung wanted to kick himself. why hadn't he visited sooner?

"no... please don't apologize-."

"i'm embarrassed," she whispered, trying to make space on the couch by tossing all of her used bedding to the floor.

heeseung stopped her in time, insisting that it was fine. after all, he had been the one to show up unannounced.

"what were you talking about before, y/n?" heeseung tried holding her gaze, but she quickly averted her eyes to her slippers once more. "what grievances are you talking about?"

every sigh that escaped y/n's lips was a dagger to heeseung's heart. he watched as she struggled to find the words to say. sensing her panic, heeseung guided her into her cocoon of blankets - making some room for himself as well. the two of them sat side-by-side in silence. he could wait all day for her to reply, especially if it meant not leaving her alone in this state.

"your friends," y/n reached for her phone from the recesses of her blankets, "they all texted me these paragraphs about something that i posted privately yesterday."

WHAT?!

heeseung could feel his blood boiling. "how do you mean?"

PARAGRAPHS?!

y/n unlocked her phone and handed the device to the man beside her. just as soon as he got a hold of her phone, she quickly retracted her hand and brought it to her eyes, rubbing away at them.

heeseung first watched as y/n began to curl up into a ball, then he directed his attention to her phone. upon first glance at her message app, he noticed that there were three circles pinned to the top: two group chats - one called "ohana 👑" and the other "the tortured poets department 🖊️" - and a silly selfie of him and y/n with the nickname "evan lee 💜" plastered just below it. a blush danced upon his cheeks at the sight of it all.

however, the warmth in his cheeks lasted for only a millisecond as his eyes fell just below their text thread; it appeared that ni-ki, jay, sunghoon, jake, and sunoo all sent messages to y/n in the time that it took for heeseung to arrive. heeseung tapped at the most recent of the texts, sunoo's. he repeated the process with jake's, sunghoon's, jay's, and finally, ni-ki's texts. with each scroll through of texts from his friends, he found himself getting angrier and angrier at them. especially after reading y/n's responses to each of them.

it was hard to tell tone over text, but heeseung knew his friends well. each message to y/n was crafted uniquely and in the sender's own words, but the gist of what they were saying was all the same.

they each started their message by telling y/n that they had been with jungwon the day before and how he had asked them if she was okay. they all state that they didn't know what he could possibly be talking about until jungwon mentioned that it was in reference to her instagram story - a story he failed to mention was only for close friends.

jay and sunoo went on to say that they didn't mind that they couldn't see her story; y/n was allowed to pick and choose who she wanted to see those stories. jake, ni-ki, and sunghoon - on the other hand - took major offense into not being able to see her story, considering "everything" they had been through "together with k". they all mentioned how deeply hurt they were by the fact that y/n said she had not friends. ni-ki had gone as far as to say, "i thought that me and the hyungs were your friends. but i guess not, huh?"

they then followed up their emotions with the same statements they were exclaiming at the park, about how if y/n had something to say about them to just outright say it and not dabble in this "high school bullshit and make everyone play this stupid game where they have to figure out what the hell it is they did wrong" (as jake put it in his text). in sunoo's message, he claimed that he was only reaching out to y/n because he wanted to be upfront with her and couldn't think of a single thing he might have done to offend her. jay and sunghoon continued to stress the fact that their text wasn't meant to be read as an attack, but they "wanted to be adults about the situation instead of resorting to petty, childish drama" because they too couldn't think of anything to warrant such a post from y/n. ni-ki drew from the fact that he and the rest of the boys were hurting over this and how it was "shady and cringy" to post a story like that on her social media account; he accused her of just wanting attention because he "didn't do anything wrong" so for her to post that with the implication that he had irritate the maknae to no end.

just like that, each of them wrapped up their lengthy chunks of text to y/n with such vitriol that heeseung couldn't believe that these were his friends. he knew they were coming from a place of hurt, but he was surprised that they didn't see y/n's post for what it truly was: a cry for help.

instead, they turned her raw emotions into their hurt egos. they decided to take bits and pieces of y/n's story and mold it into this narrative where she attempted to assassinate their characters. it went from being a post about how utterly depressed and pathetic she felt to being a post about them.

and heeseung was livid.

with all of them.

when had they become so self-important? if they were truly y/n's friends like they had so furiously claimed to be, why hadn't any of them asked if she was okay? even jungwon failed to ask her, opting instead to ask his hyungs and ni-ki - which, arguably got everyone in this mess in the first place.

heeseung felt his mind drift back to y/n's reply to each of the boys' texts. while he didn't read every single one, he did read the only one that got a text back, y/n's text to ni-ki. it was a long, heartfelt apology from y/n; heeseung could see how this whole mess was tearing her up inside just from her words to ni-ki alone. but he got even madder when he got to her parting words, only to see that ni-ki had replied with, "k. thanks for reaching out. i just need time for myself if i'm being honest. bye."

before he could say anything, heeseung was brought back to reality when he caught y/n silently sobbing into her hands from the corner of his eye.

"i'm sorry!" she whispered. over and over again. each time more broken than the last.

heeseung gently pulled her closer to his chestm cradling her to him as he rubbed his thumb against her back in an effort to comfort her. "you have nothing to be sorry for..."

"i hurt everyone's feelings-!"

"fuck them," heeseung growled, holding her tighter. "i'm sorry. i'm sorry that they let their egos get in the way of being decent human beings. i'm sorry that you've felt so alone for the last few months. i'm sorry that i haven't shown up for you in the way that you needed someone to be there."

y/n cried harder. "i... i... i... i didn't... i didn't mean..." her hiccups were affecting the rhythm of her speech. "i didn't mean that... that we weren't friends! i just... i just felt-."

"shhhh," he soothed as she shuddered under his embrace. "we haven't been very good friends to you as of lately, anyway. they're like my brothers and i love them, but those messages alone... we haven't been decent friends to you. i can understand how easy it is to feel like you're this lonely, little island, especially when the rest of us are still going out and making no effort to see how you're doing.

"i saw their messages to you. in ni-ki's case specifically, i scrolled up a little too far and saw that you've spent the last half of these past few months messaging him little things like tiktoks and memes only for him to like them or reply to you with one word. have you been reaching out to the rest of the boys?"

he felt her nod against his chest.

oh... so he was the only one to not have heard from her. the green-eyed monster crept into his thoughts momentarily, only for him to realize that the others' text threads were probably just as dry as ni-ki's.

"i'm really sorry that i didn't reach out to you sooner," heeseung sighed. "i really don't know what i was thinking. i'm sorry that you've felt so alone."

once y/n had calmed down enough to stop her hiccups, she excused herself to grab a glass of water. she asked heeseung if he wanted anything while she was up, but he declined - instead offering to get the glass for her. she appreciated the gesture but went to get the water herself.

this moment alone left heeseung in his thoughts again. he didn't want her to have to recount anything to him if she didn't want to, but he still needed to know. in her text to ni-ki, she said that she hadn't meant to keep jungwon on her list of close friends. that what she posted hadn't meant to be for the people she had met in south korea; it was for her friends back home - as a way to vent out the frustrations she hadn't known how to put into words for her korean audience. these frustrations, from what heeseung could gather, were things she wasn't ready to tell him or the others.

but the others had practically forced it out of her in her apologies to them...

... and ni-ki had the gall to tell her that he needed time and space from her. the rest left her on read - as if only turning their read receipts on for this moment alone.

heeseung could feel himself getting worked up all over again. gripping tightly at the fabric of his jeans, he sat up straighter when he heard y/n coming back to the darkened living room.

"i'm sorry," y/n whispered as she neared him.

heeseung stared up at her helplessly as she sat beside him. "no, there's nothing to be-."

"i meant to take all of you off my 'close friends' list. it wasn't because i didn't think we were friends; there are just some things from my past that i'm not ready to talk about with you guys yet-."

"and you don't have to! i'm sorry that the rest of them think that you owe us that..."

"i mean... they thought it was about them; they just wanted to clear things up and let how they were feeling be known," y/n said with a sigh, pulling heeseung's coat closer to her chest. "i offended them. i respect them from being upfront about their feelings-."

"IT'S FUCKING BULLSHIT!" heeseung stood up to face y/n. "WHY ARE THEY ALLOWED TO EXPRESS THEIR EMOTIONS LIKE THAT AND YOU'RE NOT?"

regret washed over heeseung as he noticed y/n's sullen eyes widen. she bit her quivering lips and heeseung wanted to punch himself in the face.

"sorry," he muttered. "i didn't mean to blow up like that. i just..."

heeseung knelt before y/n.

"no, it's okay," she said, avoiding his gaze.

"it's not... and what the guys did isn't okay either. yeah, they confronted you because they thought it was about them and they want to clear the air, but there's a way to go about that. and for ni-ki to go off on your like that only to leave you with that 'i need space' bullshit of a text-."

"he's just a kid."

"i get that, but i have no idea where the boys get off with being so... i don't know... vain? for lack of a better word. their reactions just feel so... guilty. as if they had done something-."

"i was being extremely vague in my post."

heeseung took y/n's shaking hands, finally holding her gaze as she looked at him. she seemed shocked by the physical interaction; he wondered how long it had been since she had touched another person outside their hug minutes ago.

"exactly! if it wasn't about them, but they somehow found a way to relate to it? i don't know... again, i think they're acting out of guilt," heeseung caressed the back of her hands with his thumb.

y/n gave heeseung a sad smile. "i get their side. with the way i worded everything, i can see how they relate what i wrote with the way everyone handled everything between k and me a few years ago."

heeseung felt y/n rip her hands away from his as she buried her face into her hands. sitting back on the couch, he pulled her into another hug; she didn't seem to be crying again, but he couldn't be too sure anymore. y/n hadn't mentioned her past relationship with k since their nasty breakup, but he remembered how unbothered she had been upon seeing him seven months ago at jake's birthday party. he also remembered how angered y/n had been - despite being unbothered at k's initial presence - because he attempted to approach her while she was alone at the open bar, grabbing refills for heeseung, sunghoon, and herself.

"... did the post have anything to do with k?" heeseung asked. he felt her go stiff at the mention of her ex-boyfriend before shaking her head against his chest and letting out a small sniffle. "okay, then? so the boys had nothing to worry about. it's just this huge misunderstanding. if they want to hold it against you, fuck 'em."

"i still really hurt their feelings."

"you apologized. did they?"

y/n pushed heeseung away to hug her legs to her chest. she shook her head. "but... a selfish part of me really feels like i'm owed one."

"it's not selfish - especially after you cleared it up with them. they jumped conclusions and said extremely hurtful things to you. if they truly did no wrong - which who knows, maybe they didn't do anything wrong! - i don't know... maybe they shouldn't have been so defensive. i don't know! maybe it's just me... but their behavior is downright embarrassing!"

with another sigh, y/n leaned against heeseung, who instantly wrapped his arm around her; it felt just like before, like no time had passed between the two of them. like there wasn't this mix of guilt, hopelessness, and despair in the air between them.

"embarrassing?"

"how else would your describe it when you make someone else's trauma and hurting about you?" heeseung asked, giving y/n's shoulder a tight squeeze. "y/n, i know you. i know you're not going to hold this another the boys, but i think their reaction to all of this is downright stupid. you talked about some pretty serious stuff in your post, but they pushed past that to complain that you might have posted about them. that doesn't sit right with me-."

"it's not that deep, hee-."

"except it is, y/n! this is exactly what happened with k hyung after you two broke up and more recently after jake's party. specifically after jake's party, you posted something privately about how hard things have been on your end and how it was affecting your mental health; someone shared it with him and he confronted you-."

"k apologized-."

"but then he immediately turned the conversation into 'i'm sorry, but also you hurt me!' and then you two only focused on his feelings!" heeseung thought back to that time. "i just... i feel like the boys took whatever was posted in the wrong direction. and even then, it wasn't even aimed in their direction to begin with! there are worse things to be done and that have been done than taking someone off your story then putting them back on..."

y/n pressed herself closer to heeseung as he continued.

"and honestly... whatever was actually said in your story was so much bigger than their feelings being hurt, y/n. because we both know that wasn't what it was about."

"hee..."

"look, i know... i know that you never meant for any of us to see it, but we did. and instead of seeing it for what it was, most of them made it about themselves. and i'm sorry for that. i'm sorry that we haven't been good friends to you lately - to the point where you felt like we weren't your friends to begin with. they're allowed to be hurt over it if they truly think that it's about them, but they can't just ambush you like that and then close the discussion when you clear the air and open it up for them. honestly, with the way all of this was handled, i wouldn't be surprised if you still stood by that statement! it's almost like... at every turn, you're reprimanded in some way for posting about your feelings. someone always has to take it out of context and make it about themselves.

"you literally told every single one of them that it had nothing to do with them and they have the audacity to sit there and say that they need time away from you? again, that doesn't sit right with me! why are you made to be the problem in every situation you're stuck to struggle with!"

there was still so much more heeseung had wanted to say, but the sounds of y/n's violent sobs had stopped him. she began to wail into his chest again and she squeezed him closer to her. heeseung felt his heart breaking as he looked down at one of his best friends. she wept loudly, screaming incoherent phrases into him while heeseung held her tightly.

"i'm sorry," heeseung whispered into her hair, pulling her onto his lap. "i'm sorry that i wasn't there for you before... i'm sorry that it's taken me so long to see how much you've been hurting. i'm sorry for everything. but i'm here now."

[ashleyeveerson]

✨ THE DAN AND PHIL LORE pt. 3✨

CHECK OUT PART 2: https://www.tumblr.com/ashleyeveerson/760707933651746816?source=share

Phil ALSO comes out! (yeah no i'm not crying what? not them feeling comfortable enough to be themselves yeah). 2019 also brings us the adoption of a fish named Norman (a cutie) AND they also post pictures about their recent trip to Japan [the photo of Phil looking up to Dan behind the camera? yeah i am so normal about it, i swear]. There is hope in the horizon still for a Dan and Phil comeback...

BAM! A certain virus runs wild and forces everyone to stay at home. Phil continues to upload solo videos which distracted so many of us during these dark times. Dan, however is AWOL and the only pic we have of him is a shitty screenshot of him in glasses and a mask helping Phil rescue an injured pigeon (lockdown was WILD).

Also, my boy Dan post a cryptic tweet that leads to the announcement of a self-help book named YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS NIGHT (because you will <3). Nah but I can't count how many times I've sobbed reading it, just him trying to help out others who have also struggled with mental health... istg i love this man

Hey so THEY BUY THEIR FOREVER PHOUSE TOGETHER they're gonna kill me one day istg. "Dan and Phil just decided to pay a mortgage together", top 10 sentences that would kill a 2016 phan. They are slaying, they are glowing... also rip Norman the fish you will not be forgotten

So during 2014 the fates (aka a random youtuber) foretold that Dan and Phil would be married in 2022. Since that clearly didn't happen the meme PHIVORCE united the phandom once more. ALSO Dan is out there shitting on youtube (as he should) and going on his solo tour WE'RE ALL DOOMED! Which i love with all my heart and also Phil being there for him every step of the way... AHHHHHHHH

Anyways a certain video called Dan and Phil finally tell the truth hits the internet and let's just say GOD DAMN. This also starts a wonderful trend amongst Dan and Phil in which they make fun of their audience (we deserve it ngl) and absolutley SHOCK US with new information about bonkers shit from their past [apparently they were offered a threesome MULTIPLE TIMES???]

It's the end. They've decided to give up their channel "Dan and Phil Games" forever... let's take a moment and silent and mourn with a compilation of Heart eyes Howell

...

SIKE! We're back baby and we're better than ever!!! The goodbye video turned out the be an ANNOUNCEMENT of their comeback. They are back, Dil Howlter is here and Phil confesses to having dyed everything green in the house when Dan went on tour bc he missed him (OH GOD). Also, the Halloween baking video introduced us to the icon that is.... *drumroll please*

SISTER DANIEL, the queen of making everyone reconsider their sexuality... she is the moment, she is an icon and she is serving astronomical levels of cunt at all time [jokes aside, Dan being comfortable enough to do drag in public, fuck they've come so far i'm so proud of them <3].

And here we are in the future, it's present day and they are queerer and happier than ever. THE PICTURES I CAN'T ISTG. Also Dan's Birthday stream is beyond iconic. First of all my unproblematic kings make it a charity stream to donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund (using their public influence for good hell yeah)... And how did they raise the money you ask? WELL BY HITTING IS WHERE WE'RE WEAKEST. Sister Daniel makes a spectacular comeback, FATHER PHIL is introduced and Dan even dyes his hair red to be more Good Omens coded... which timeline are we living in again? like how is any of this real?

Also them drawing the PINOF whiskers on their faces again... they're literally growing old together I'm gonna go sob in a corner. Also the fake apology video bc they have no fashion sense in the Sims 4 is hilarious as fuck. HOW CAN THEY POSSIBLY BE SO MUCH HOTTER ON THEIR THIRTIES EXPLAIN??

anyways the phandom is still speculating wether they're erasing "i love you's" at the end of their text when they show them on videos... guess some things never change. Nah but the vibes are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT NOW, they are more open than they've ever been and participate on the phan culture FULLY to the point that they're the ones terrorizing us now.

QUICK DETOUR TO TALK ABOUT PHIL'S FAMOUS BAD LUCK (and then they wonder why he's always dying in the fanfics). Nah but my poor man has had his fair share of medical problems, the most recent being...

OH GOD WHY WOULD YOU ANNOUNCE SOMETHING LIKE THAT THIS WAY?? nah like using humor as a coping mechanism and all but do they wanna gives a heart attack?! iconic i fear however

So yeah the video where they talk about it is WILD (funniest shit about the whole ordeal is that a nurse mistook Dan as Phil's son). Also I saw a tweet speculating about Phil having a hickey like... first of all what is it? 2009? Second of all IT'S MOST LIKELY A POPPED VESSEL FROM LOSING ALL THAT BLOOD YOU KNOW

They still were able to go on their vacation (aka the rodent boy summer) which gifted us with this iconic pics... ALSO they dropped a new Dan and Phil beats for summer go check out the names of the tracks istg they wanna kill their fans.

Nothing is sacred anymore, they've infiltrated twtphan, they're actively reposting memes and writing fanfiction about themselves. It's the wild west, everytime you get a notification is like playing Russian Rulet. Cringe is dead and Dan and Phil ARE COMING NEAR YOUR CITY on a tour named "Terrible Influence" where Phil's spent 300€ on silicone. It's a wonderful time to be a phan.

OKAY SO here's some stuff that didn't make the cut but that i find too hilarious to not mention. In no apparent order: DAN DRESSING UP AS A CATBOY, Dan and Phil playing technicians 1 and 2 on Big Hero 6 and two brothers on the Lion King (wtf was that also they gave the gorilas matching fringes), Dan dressing up as a golden pig (my boy has RANGE) and finally Dan being too embarassed to admit he stalked Phil and telling a reporter he was only asking for "editing tips" if you know what i mean

Also a short compilation of Dan and Phil losing the idgaf war against eachother THEY ARE SO THOUGHTFUL ABOUT EVERYTHING. Special mention to Daniel's 🧡 when Phil praised "We're all doomed!" and Dan's ranch metaphor to describe their relationship (just go watch the mukkbang video OH LORD)

SO, in conclusion... Dan and Phil's refusal to belittle their past and instead embrace it as part of their story while actively moving into the future alongside the phandom YEAH THAT SHIT MEANS SOMETHING. They're simultaneously healing our inner child while embracing us as the adults we've become i have many feelings about them

So what are they?

They're just Dan and Phil.

[ikeep-forgetting-mypass]

As much as I like matpat I am dreading when he plays ruin because this is just going to fuel his 'gregory is evil' stich which I HATE.

Like, maybe stop demonizing this 9 year old. I get it, he has committed many crimes, as he should, and destroyed the glamrocks, but they can be FIXED. THEY ARE ROBOTS. THEY CAN BE PUT TOGETHER AGAIN AND ARE EVEN STILL FUNCTIONAL EVEN AFTER BEING SHATTERED.

You know who can't be fixed if he loses an arm or an eye? GREGORY (because he isn't a robot because FUCK THAT) like???

He is a homeless kid, of course he's going to be a brutal little shit and prioritizes survival against morals, he is on the fucking streets, and the animatronics have been trying to kill him for an entire night, making him run all across the PizzaPlex. You know how fucking big that place is!?

Also, him betraying Cassie makes zero sense for multiple reasons,

1: He went through fucking hell for Freddy and he only knew him for 6 hours, like. He was willing to steal a car and live with him on the road in one ending, tries to save him in the Afton ending, carries his head around, and is shown to cry when he's disassembled, something he is only seen to do in the Bad Ending or when Freddy is ok.

HE LITERALLY COMMITS MANSLAUGHTER IN ONE ENDING FOR HIS ROBOT-DAD FOR FUCKS SAKE.

Even when Freddy is possessed by Peepaw William, instead of trying to dismantle him, he tries to save him instead, when if it was any other animatronic he wouldn't have hesitated to destroy them.

Because of what the cutouts in Roxy Raceway tell us, Gregory and Cassie have a close friendship, him being the only one to show up to her birthday and giving her a napkin to clean up her tears. When you see his missing posters, you can see Cassie is crying, and due to him being homeless, she probably made those posters herself.

(which i am sorely disappointed if no one has made an angsty thing yet c'mon guys)

(I HC them as siblings, but I guess steel wool said fuck you entropy)

So why, if he was willing to do all of that for Freddy, where it was a plot point for all of the endings, would he betray Cassie and try to kill her? It doesn't make sense to me, adding onto my other point:

2: At the end, as everyone predicted, the mimic was pretending to be Gregory this entire time. I don't know why exactly it was luring cassie, probably to kill her or something, but the mimic is a whole other rant because it brings the books explicitly and that means GGY could be canon which. Ugh.

Anyways, it's revealed again to everyone's predictions, that Gregory isn't in the PizzaPlex, which I think is a missed opportunity but that's just me. Cassie escapes the Mimic and 'gregory' says that she awakened it (Afton) and then the elevator falls.

I see people saying that Gregory killed her, but my question is how?

If he isn't anywhere in the PizzaPlex, and can only see the layout, how was he able to cut the elevator wires if not physically present? Did he teleport? Did he magically get into the mainframe and somehow break it down? No.

In conclusion, if there's an installment following this it better not have a villain Gregory or I swear to God steel wool I am able to forgive you for hello neighbor I will NOT forgive you for that

EDIT: just some more things I want to add because MatPat is playing ruin and I am fueled with dread and excitement.

I see people bringing up the books and the whole patient 46 or 42 or 420 or whichever the fuck, which is still do not get, but I don't understand most things in this franchise anyways so.

Even if the mimic and GGY are canon, I still firmly believe that gregory's actions (if he did do them) were manipulated by William/Glitchtrap, with him being mind-controlled like Vanessa. If your going to demonize him for that, then you would have to do the same thing for Vanessa, who has canonically killed enough children to fill out a newspaper as seen in the Bad Ending when it's revealed Gregory is homeless.

(I don't know how or when old willy put his hands on my boy's mind, but It is not because he is a robot because he isn't. the only reason Freddy say's he's broken is because of censorship.

(PS, please stop censoring horror franchises unless it's actually depicts idk SA, talking to you Megan Is Missing. The original line was that gregory cut himself while in the vents. you didn't need to censor that idqbnofq)

Also, for people saying that Gregory is sadistic for destroying and harvesting the animatronics....

I see your point, and I raise that he is a homeless child who probably just got out of mind-control and is now being chased around a massive mall bigger than a 10 Walmart's and Targets put together, trying to escape 3 (4 and 5 if you count sun & moon and a hell of a lot more counting the security bots and damn endos) eight to seven foot hunks of heavy metal and sharp teeth capable of and known for destroying security bots because of Pizza and Jealousy Issues (Roxy and Chica) another that's infamous for destroying fences, his own room and is rumored/thought to have destroyed another robot, and a security guard who, (in yet again deleted voice lines that should have been in the game god damnit steel wool) he saw change into a skipping bunny with a kitchen knife all trying to kill him with only one protector for 6-7 hours straight with barely a moment to breathe.

What do you expect? him to be all "I'm so sorry *cries* let's all be friends!!" NO. in a better world and in a better made game maybe we could have that, but in this world no. Maybe he's a little remorseful, but in the way you kill a bug kind of remorseful.

Also, again, homeless children who probably had to raise themselves aren't going to be the most morally aware children, of course he's going to worry about his and the one person/robot who took care of him in a while above the ones who are attempting to murder him.

[if-lost-please-return-to-maliksi]

Disclaimer: I do not own any Planet Puto Character - Full Credit goes to HC - @ask-emilz-de-philz. Please check out their blog for amazing art and the wonderful world of Planet Puto.This might or might not be a self insert, please don't come for me.

A/N: Am I insane and out of my mind? Yes. Was I in the middle of a creativity block and just pulled this world building shit out of thin air? Also yes.

~Royalty! AU~ INTRODUCTION

"That one looks half decent..."

Lakan smirked as he pointed into you using the sharp end of his sword, not caring if you're already trembling. Is it because of the fear? or maybe it's from being on your knees on the snowy ground with nothing but thin and tattered clothes for god knows how long, you don't really know at this point.

The military general leans down to your level hand grabbing your cheeks roughly and forcing you to look up at him.

"Tell me, peasant. What entertaining stuff can you do? Careful about your answer, your life depends on it." His voice, although very soft and playful has that menacing tone that didn't fail to give you goosebumps.

The ground was cold and the air was thick— filled with cries for mercy as Lakan's troops destroy and slaughter whatever they lay eyes on.

"I- I can play instruments and write poetry, Sir." You stuttered as your voice get struck in your throat.

"We're taking this one home." Lakan grinned at your response before letting go of your face.

"This will do for Maliksi's birthday present. Now let's pack up before the enemy's reinforcements arrive. Just set fire to everything then let's call it a day."

The servants looked at you somberly as you were dragged out of the carriage and into the palace gates, the soldiers handling you roughly. You can't blame them, after all you are nothing but a peasant from the losing side of this wretched war. These people are the ruthless victors, their hands soaked with the blood of your fellow civilians that unfortunately got caught in the middle of slaughter.

"Lakan, what is the meaning of this?" A firm voice caught your attention but you kept your head lowered on the ground.

Makisig quickly motioned towards his courtesans to help you stand up as he walked towards Lakan.

"Oh, if it isn't my own brother, the King." Lakan tauntingly said as he bowed slightly. He's always despised the idea of Makisig ascending to the throne despite being younger than him.

That position was meant for him, yet here he is, reduced to being the general who spends more time outside the palace walls instead of seating on that fancy throne he's always dreamt of.

"Cut it out! What are you doing? You do know that the enemies already called defeat and you can't be taking in anymore war prisoners!"

"Prisoner? That one was a present for our youngest brother."

"A present?! Our brother is nothing like you! He won't enjoy such fatuity—"

"And? Who does he take after then? Everyone here knows that the young prince isn't soft like you! Hell, I bet he'll be a better king than you!"

Makisig's royal guards quickly drew blade and pointed it at the general. They will not stand for any slander against the King. It is a crime of treason afterall and will be punishable by death. The King sighed, "Lower your blades! He's still my brother."

Lakan softly chuckled as he turned to walk away. "See? I told you. Soft. Please have your courtesans clean up and dress that girl, then take her to my room. I'll deliver her myself to Maliksi."

You shivered at the first touch of cold water into your skin as the royal courtesans started giving you a bath. You've literally been in crossfire and to say that you are filthy is an understatement. You didn't even know how Lakan was able to spot you amongst the civilians.

No one was talking, probably out of pity for you and what you went through— your kingdom just lost the war, your town was burnt to a crisp, you watched the others getting killed infront of you. You are someone who lost everything.

After your bath, they dressed you up in a fine dress, probably too grand from what you were expecting, and then they proceeded to put your curly hair up in a bun using an intricate pin.

Looking at yourself in the mirror, you can't help but admire your reflection. Funny what a bath and some fancy fabric can do.

"You look pretty." One of the courtesans whispered as she gave you a kind smile. All of them looked hopeful and sweet, probably wishing you good fate inside the very walls of this palace just like them. They all lined up as they silently lead you to Lakan's quarters.

"Bring her in and leave." Lakan said from the inside of the room before the royal courtesans can even knock. They did just that but before they finally close the door, they looked at each other before giving you a reassuring nod.

As soon as the doors closed, the royal courtesans raced towards Maliksi's quarters. He wasn't the friendliest towards them, and they will surely be yelled at for disturbing him at this time, but they all know Lakan and the poor fate every other lady went through after spending time alone with him in his quarters. They cannot just do nothing after sending you to your possible doom.

Lakan's room is dark yet you can feel his stares boring a hole to your very being. "Guess I was right, you do look good."

The general smirked as he slowly walked towards you. "A poet and a musician doesn't have a right to look this good. It'll be such a waste to just give you to my youngest brother afterall." He softly said, his hot breath fanning into your neck as he leans in while his hand reaches out to slightly slide the dress down and reveal your left shoulder.

"Maybe I should get a taste first, before giving you to Maliksi."

You grabbed fistfuls into your dress as you held yourself from talking back or trying fighting him off— you knew this man would not hesitate in killing you if you do something as much as turn down his advances.

You can feel warm tears form and trickle down your cheeks, knowing that you can't ask him to stop if you wanted to live.

"I don't accept leftovers, brother. It's rude to gift someone stuff that you already used." A cold voice emerged from the shadows as you felt being snatched from Lakan's grip and being pulled as someone held you gently by your waist.

"Gods! Maliksi, can you stop doing that?! I know that you're the only one blessed with magic among us but just stop popping out of the shadows, it creeps me out. Can't you use a fucking door like a normal person?"

"It's called teleportation magic. I didn't popped out of the shadows, your room is just as dark as your soul. Anyway, you boldly declared this lady as a present for me earlier and I have eyewitnesses. I came here to pick her up." Maliksi nonchalantly said as he rolled his eyes, still holding you close to him.

"It's those courtesans...I knew it! If it weren't for the King's protection, I would've already cut their heads off." Lakan muttered underneath his breath while he gritted his teeth. "Aaaww, come on, brother! Can't we share just this once—"

Maliksi's expression hardened as he looked Lakan up and down. You can feel just how intimidating this man is despite him being shorter than the general.

"I believe we already established that since we were kids....That if you try touching what's mine, I'll be burning your fingers off." The young prince coldly said, his grip on your waist slightly tightening.

Lakan chuckled as he slowly backed away. He wasn't irritated at how his youngest brother is acting— oh, this is so much better than him being a big pretentious softy just like the King.

"As you wish, brother." The general smiled, everything is going according to his plan afterall.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Hi! Welcome to the Royalty! Au that involves Planet Puto (philmytcrea au) characters. I do not own them, they are HC's Original Characters.

Please follow and support them here: https://www.tumblr.com/ask-emilz-de-philz / @ask-emilz-de-philz

I wanted to take time to clarify that this is fiction on fiction.

Yes, Lakan, Makisig, and Maliksi are brothers in this AU.

Yes, we hab King! Makisig here.

Lakan is the oldest, but Makisig was the one who ascended to the throne after their father died.

Yes, there is an ongoing war and Y/N (You/ Reader) is from the enemy kingdom who just declared Loss/ Defeat against Makisig's Kingdom.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING AND APPRECIATING WHAT I WRITE! ;;

[1moreff-creator]

Happy Birthday Eden Tobisa!

Turns out our favorite clock girly has her birthday on New Year's Eve! What a nice date for such a nice girl! Let's do a character analysis, fun facts, and songs!

-We know relatively little about Eden's backstory. The most notable thing we know about her life before the killing game, apart from her fascination with clocks, is what is revealed in her chapter 2 secret: "Ever since you kissed her, you were afraid your sexuality would ruin your friendships." Which is pretty straightforward; she's canonically a lesbian and is worried it would negatively affect her friendships.

-Literally the only other thing we know about her backstory is that she lived in Japan for a small period of time when she was younger, before moving back to the US. This was revealed in a Q&A.

(... You know, I made a deranged theory in my Mai post that maybe the girl that Eden kissed was actually Mai. It wasn't very serious, since it was just a silly way to try to explain what the hell Eden's quote in the Mai page could mean. But... we know Teruko was in Japan for a while when she was younger, and it's theorized she knew Mai before being separated from her at some point. Combined with Mai's name being seemingly Japanese, it could imply Mai also lived in Japan at some point. And if that's the case, it's possible she met Eden there? To be clear, that's still an insane possibility, but I do find it a funny possibility, which is why I'm sharing it)

-Apart from that, Eden's defining trait is her optimism and her trust in others. She sticks to Teruko's side even after she starts pushing everyone away in CH 1, and confesses to her that she believes "not caring about others is the worst way to live." She's importantly not naive, she does know their situation is horrible, but still she constantly searches for an exit and tries to build good friendships with the others.

-This includes baking with Min, Rose and Teruko in CH1, inviting Teruko and Arei to make clocks on CH2, etc. Basically, she's awesome and nice and mature.

-Also she loves clocks. Regular Ultimate stuff, she can apparently spend hours and hours working and losing track of time.

-Although for such an optimistic character, her secret quote is quite ominous. "You can't go back, no matter how hard you try." We have zero clue what this means at the moment, but at least it does fit the symbolism of time always moving forward.

-Meanwhile, her quote in the Mai page is "She kept calling the number, even though no one picked it up." This is even more incomprehensible! Eden, what in the world are you talking about?

-Alright, David MV. She doesn't have a color in Color Theory, but her numeral is XII (twelve). Go to 1:48:28 in this video for an explanation. God it's so convenient to have that lol.

Alright fun facts!

-As stated, her birthday (December 31st) lands on New Year's Eve. Maybe representing new beginnings or change, which certainly goes well with her character. How nice!

-Like most of the cast, she's American and right-handed.

-She's one of the only characters with dyed hair. Her hair was originally just brown.

-Her favorite color is daffodil yellow, because it's happy, and her least favorite color is blue, because it's "kind of a downer color." Areden shippers in shambles.

-Her favorite ice cream flavor is honeycomb. I didn't even know that existed but go off queen.

-She enjoys cute fashion, but also enjoys wearing androgynous style clothing.

-She likes food which is fun to make or prepare. How nice!

-She's biracial; her mother is black and her father is Japanese. This is why she spent a bit of time in Japan when she was younger.

-Her name in kanji is 飛佐【とび ・ さ】楽【いーでん】. Gonna leave any actual meaning as homework, but it's worth noting her name was anglicized. I think that would translate to "Iden", but her mother liked the name "Eden", so they went with that instead.

Finally, songs that remind me of her!

-Positive Parade by DECO*27

-Gone Fishing by Ghost & Pals (friendship!)

-Aura by Ghost & Pals

-In Iolite by Ghost & Pals

-Magnet by minato

-Those Who Carried On by Ghost & Pals

-I'm Glad You're Evil Too by PinocchioP

And Happy Birthday! And a happy new year! Well wishes to all you Tumblr peeps. Take care!

[no-gram]

ACT1 Bizarre Poems

Hey, you. You know, don't you? Outside of this dream system of ours. A character that doesn't exist. A curse. A little tea party. This is a kind of boundary that is about to break.

Thinking back, it might have been the same at that time.

In the middle of the night My heart pauses for a moment That's when I have scary dreams.

There is a wall between me and those girls. I'm not talking about distance. There is a literal wall. I've been here so long, it feels like I've been here since birth, but I still clearly remember being brought here by her. Today I dream again that tomorrow I will be killed.

One day, there was a crack in this wall. Another day, the crack got bigger. I don't know what is beyond this crack, because there is only a mercury lamp here. But I can see the glittering neon lights on the other side. Maybe it's heaven on the other side.

When you want to kill one person When you want to kill someone You're the only one? and you come to me

the sound of something cracking in my head. 　I wish I could go on and on and on and on and on and on …… and …… the sound of me laughing

'ohohohohohohohohoho' 'yihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihi' “hahahahahahahahahahaha” “huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh.” Rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle. Rumble-rattle-rattle-rattle. Rumble, rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle. Serves you right

From the corner of the blue sky “from the corner of the blue sky “who's staring at me and wondering what I'm doing. You did it with flair. I would have died otherwise. What are you going to do now? I'm gonna kill all the xxx except you. I'm not gonna stop you. I'm not a admin. What are you going to do with this? Let's get her in there. I won't help you. She's not that bad. She's the one who locked me in there, and more importantly, she won't have it herself. She deserves at least a parting gift. I see.

Why didn't you say so earlier? Because it wants you to be whole. I can't go against that. Then I've done the worst thing I could ever do to them. Not really. I'm just optimizing it over and over again. What about you, what do you do? I'll just optimize. If it brings you peace. Well, I guess this is goodbye. Maybe we'll see each other again soon. We are not the cause of this ＿＿＿＿ hatred, and there is no one here to hate. “Happy birthday to you, even though it's not what I expected at all.”

Oh. What a horrible torment. This beautiful, delightful island is now a skunky hell. Oh, God. Oh, God. Why don't you just kill us both at once? …………

…… everything is a fetus's dream. …… that little girl's scream… …… this dark ceiling… …the sunlight on that window………No…no………Everything that happens today is like that……… ……I'm still in my mother's womb. I'm suffering from algae scratchings from this horrible “fetal dream”. ……

……How about it……Do you remember……your name…… ……huh Still don't get it……? ……. AHAHAHAHAHAHA. That's because you still stuck in the habit of thinking with my brain's marrow.

The real prelude went something like this, and the next time I woke up, I knew what I had to do. The number of precious things lost will crack, and the idol will be broken. I don't want that anymore. Even if no one understands me, I won't make a mistake next time.

So, so please… don't make a mistake. We have done nothing wrong. No one has made a mistake yet. The hatred that needs to be directed is in your world.

The one-winged angel, the one who doesn't want to be saved, the one who was burned by her fallen love, the one who tormented me, they were not wrong. There must be a way.

A revisionist and monstrous work, based on a quote from a monster who speaks the name of a certain dream and an afterimage from a bygone era.

jp file

[intertexts]

GOODMORNING ITS TRIVA TIIIIME

EPISODE 29 TRIVIA:

- they actually rerecorded this episode. bizly wanted dakotas lesson to be strategy so ORIGINALLY they were fucking. playing chess. for two hours. according to charlie "they had chess dot com open. I don't know where condi was but I was physically prone on the other side of my room like hiding behind something" SO THEY HATED IT. AND THEN RERECORDED IT AND ENDED UP WITH THIS.

- DAKOTA IS OFFICIALLY 18. HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY. really funny that this happens in the hyperbolic time chamber where time in the real world doesn't actually move.

- THERES ART FOR THE BOULDER THING !!!! ITS AWESOME I LOVE THEM

- grizzly: "in the beginning were you guys told to tell me that you were quitting the Prime defenders?"

condi: "no, not at all. that just came out naturally I think"

charlie: "I was so sad to see how heartbroken dakota got at that"

EXPLANATIONS:

condi: "I mean vyncent doesn't really... get it. a lot of hardship has come from being the prime defenders I don't think he sees it as worth all that. dont worry i dont think this is a permanent state of mind for vyncent, hes a malleable little boy, but its where hes at right now. itll change with time but right now hes a little jaded"

charlie: "williams whole plan was, now that he's basically wisp-free and given a new lease on life (< side note. phrase that causes me harm specifically) his plan was to find a way to return this smoke soul and help save ashe and then after that.. who knows"

- dakota ended that scene with "I never wanted to do it alone" and that's what gave him the idea to have them help him with the boulder. he didn't want to do it alone

- the only reason william is still here at all is because of dakota and vyncent. if they weren't here he would've been gone ages ago

- YIPPEE. YOU GET TO SEE JASON ORIGAMI FINALLY. 3/3 OF THE PRIME FORCE COLLECTED. HI JASON <3

- THEY KEEP QUOTING ANGEL WITH A SHOTGUN IN REFERRNCE TO WILLIAM. DO THEY WANT ME DEAD.

- chaos beano :]

- cue anime talk for like 10 minutes. prime defenders the weeb podcast ever <3

- OK AWESOME. BIZLY TALKING ABOUT THE CHAOS DEMON: "the way it kinda works is like... the chaos demon lost all sense of personality. yknow it was a soul at one point, but the longer you're in a place like where he was, you just lose what makes you you. imagine you're in a place where people are screaming all the time and you don't even know if the screams are coming out of your own mouth and it's just eternal nothing and everything (< horrifying!). and then when he latched onto you, dakota, it became like feeding off of your negative emotions"

- "What is dakotas worst fear personified? Who is dakota afraid of the most?"

grizzly DOES NOT ANSWER THIS >:| however he does say "it was a really good choice to show him the fall right away. had he not turned into le frog I think I would've played dakota a lot more serious. but because it went from the fall to doug to le frog *then* to ashe, I think it just pissed him off more than it scared him"

- "people try to scare us by looking like ashe a lot"

"okay, no, its only been TWO people and one of them IS ASHE."

- charlie: "yeah I was nervous about that encounter considering I looked at my sheet and all I have is a chainsaw and a shotgun in the middle of an active volcano"

- charlie slime has put together a william playlist it's it's my life mission to find it now. I found the ashe playlist I can do this. I need to judge his music taste.

- theyre talking about jason dying in one of the big darkstar battles and everything and grizzly goes "wow it's crazy how dakota was there and saw all of that"

HELP THAT'S SO FUNNY. frankly i would love to see the two hour chess hell session that's so funny to me oh my god. ALSO DAKOTA 18 WHOOOO he can get shot now!!! great!!

literally took so much psychic damage over the quitting the prime defenders talk. head in hands. im so ill over them... oh boy can't wait to see william stay wisp free and enjoy his new lease on life and be a normal uneventful teenager again !! im sure thats what the next few episodes are about!! ^__^;;

but mac he's literally an angel with a shotgun fighting til the wars done!! he wants to live not just survive!!!

prime defenders weeb podcast of all time... were they talking about one piece. thats my guess. one piece & dragon ball. also the more they talk about chaos demons the worse it is!!! fucked up!!! especially with the new knowledge from the oneshot etc! can't wait for someone to get tossed in there!!

all he has is a chainsaw and a shotgun in the middle of an active volcano.... i love u william wisp. god. also PLAYLIST... good luck finding it....

[olberic]

ranking anime i’ve watched in 2023:

as expected, here’s this year’s top 10 for how much i personally enjoyed the anime i’ve watched this year. ive watched more than this, but god i watched so many bad ones…. even number 10 sucks but everything else was worse. sad!

as always thank u gifmakers for ur service 🫡 the world would be nothing without u all

10. the legendary hero is dead! (2023)

dont watch this show. it sucks and its bad. hey. come here. hold my hand. now lets just watch and enjoy the OP ok? don't worry about the rest.

9. my daughter left the nest and returned as an s-rank adventurer (2023)

i have to admit this show charmed me. its not the best thing ive ever seen but its nice. comfy. yknow? i haven't finished it but it's enjoyable. can't rank it higher until i finish it

8. sabikui bisco (2022)

if it werent for the positively nonsensical jump in the middle of the show and the way theres just like. a lot of gaps? it’d rank higher. it’s a very cool premise for a show and i like the bisco/milo dynamic, and [SISTER] is fun as hell. it didnt wow me though overall, and while i enjoyed it i was hoping for more.

7. trigun stampede (2023)

im sorry trigun stans i simply didnt love it. i see the appeal i really do but it just didnt hook me. i really liked the animation and the storyline. im intrigued by whatever the fuck is going on with those plants and yall have said theres a tallgirl in the next season? so i’ll keep watching. i just didnt love it

6. that time i got reincarnated as a slime (2019-2021)

in contrast to #7, i can see why this show is weak HOWEVER i just enjoyed it. i like it. huge fan of how much gender the protag has. i love how they get new powers. i enjoy that it can be interpreted as an extremely bisexual show. it was well paced and the slime diaries OVA was a great addition. a lot of the characters really stuck with me too and its like. idk. one of my favourite isekais i guess

5. buddy daddies (2023)

this should rank higher. its so fun. its SO fun. its silly and it doesnt take itself seriously. i laughed in every episode. the dynamic between the guys is great. the dynamics between them and the kid is great. just a really solid show if you can stand the queerbaiting. i dont even care

4. bocchi the rock! (2022)

the bocchi side of tumblr is right this show rules. i like how real bocchi’s social anxiety feels (literally how it felt when i had it). the characters are entertaining, the show’s well done, they even have solid music (which band-based shows dont always do right!). its really funny and its really earnest and its a joy to watch

3. demon slayer: swordsmith village arc (2023)

i included the entertainment district arc in last year’s list so this arc makes the cut. im always late getting around to watch the new stuff and i dont want to read the manga but god DAMN does this show hit different. incredible fight scenes. i loved everything they did for the hashira backstories. i love whatever the fuck is up with genya. it even gave me some akaza to sustain me for the next year or whatever. ik this show gets overhyped but its normal hyped. to me.

2. frieren: beyond journey's end (2023)

oughhh frieren… ive only known this show for a few months but it means to much to me… i dont even wanna talk about it because its so good i just wanna watch it again. go watch frieren if you havent already its anime of the decade. to me

1. gundam: the witch from mercury (2022-2023)

ive never seen a gundam before but i will be watched them after this! what can be said about it that hasnt already been said on this site. the romance storyline is impeccable, the fights are awesome, the moral questions it posed were excellently covered. by the end of the first episode i was speechless. by the end of the last episode i'd cried like 4 times over the course of the show. this thing made me cry to happy birthday. what the fuck

[catlokis-blog]

do you have any gubby scenarios i am DYING for old men in love and so far you are the only person in this fandom i have seen since 2020 have correct takes on them

(PUNCHING THE AIR IN TRIUMPH) YESSS IVE BEEN DEEMED THE QUEEN OF OLD MEN IN LOVE CONTENT

im actually writing a vampire au fic right now featuring gubby and boomer ... but i wont bring that up until its closer to completion

(right now i have it roughly a third done before i do my final edits, but note that's because i just do basic planning, rough draft, and then final draft. its a pretty simple writing process and its why i dont write chaptered fics)

since you asked for gubby specifically ill focus on them especially considering theres a lot of boomer content out there but no love for the space man and the man who loves space.

read more and a headcanon dump time. you know how it is!

bubby almost DEFINITELY made the first moves to gman. i like to think it was encouraged by coomer after bubby was like btw im polyamorus and i also cant stop thinking about gman can i go ask him out. and then coomer became #1 hypeman and would try and force them into scenarios together LMFAO

gman isnt really ever forced into anything though? luckily for bubby he DID hold interest in the bastard and would go along with coomer very unsubtly trying to have them get some one-on-one time

during tommy's birthday party bubby almost definitely started flirting with gman. something about the atmosphere making even mister money bags space god start to relax and have fun a little was when he decided to make his first moves on the guy despite having eyes for him earlier

The train incident was his first attempt to talk but we all know how often gman cameos around in half life 1... bubby almost certainly took notice of black mesa's Latest Old Man Babe

gman probably barely knew how to process being flirted with at first because he's used to being treated with fear and such, and when he does get flirted with it's usually in a way that's like "oh, you're so above me", but bubby would approach it in the way you'll approach someone at a bar

as in shitty pick-up lines and very overt "you're hot as fuck, make out with me" comments. but the phrasing is more bubby's personality than bar etiquette - he's not exactly romeo.

eventually once gman gets used to bubby flirting with him after a while though the script WILL get flipped on him. because gman is no fool. in fact he is VERY observant. half of the time he spent listening to bubby's nonsense flirting (and, occasionally getting responses he didn't know he was even capable of, like an involuntary "oh my" and a blush when he said a particularly romantic line that was probably fed to him by bubby's personal cupid, dr. coomer) he would be picking up on what made bubby a little more nervous to say, a little more hopeful in how gman would respond, and what he seemed to like to hear from dr coomer

after constant passive reception of bubby's moves on him he'll fire back onto bubby with everything he had observed up to that point. even the little comments he'd whine to benrey, coomer, and even gordon when he was willing to listen to bubby. all those offhanded whiny things like "why can't he just x already" would come BITING HIM BACK.

at the end of the encounter bubby is probably rendered speechless and gman toys with him a little more through baby's first kiss from a god. he and coomer would have their own little mini celebration about this later

( and, a little bonus, despite coomer's encouragement, bubby would never actually ask gman out. he's very stubborn on waiting to be confessed to instead, which is why it took so long for him to get with coomer after literal years of flirting. gman ended up learning this too and had to research how the hell you ask someone out since he had literally never had to do that before - he was usually getting asked out and rejecting people because they were doing it for some kind of personal benefit / he doesn't have much interest in dating randoms in the first place. )

[spookytastemakercolor]

Hi! could i request headcannons for claude faustus or sebastian michaelis from black butler developing a platonic father-daughter relationship with a maid at the manor who never really had a father. Nothing romantic about the relationship just pure fluff.

Thank you so much <3

Of course you can! Ooohhhh this is going to be so cute to write!

Sebastian Michaelis

• It started out as him finding out about a new addition and next thing you know, he's made himself your father!

• You first walked in to the door and he looked at you going " This is my kid now. "

• Now, he has no clue you never had a father growing up so when you get frustrated with him he has no clue why! (Very clueless demon dad)

• He's Suttle in being a father figure but still has no clue why you'll look annoyed at it

• When you get into a fight one night and scream why you get annoyed, This man is clueless for a week! (Has to ASK the others what it is)

• When he figures it out though oh LORD!

• He's very patient and will let you adjust to it (Since it's unfamiliar to you) when you do he has your favorite treats ready and a kettle of your favorite drink

• He is protective as all hell! Knowing your a mortal and can die is enough to make him keep you locked up in the manor! (Which has happened multiple times)

• Lots and LOTS of constant reminders throughout the day! " Don't forget to clean the guest bedroom! ", " Please be careful with the knifes! ", " Don't get lost now! I don't want to have a wild goose chase with you! " (Ciel will never admit it but he finds it funny)

• He will make you breakfast in bed before he has to tend to Ciel. He will put you above the person HE HAS A CONTRACT WITH!

• When you get hurt it's almost impossible to convince this man it's not that serious (He's a demon, your a human. He treats you like a fragile doll)

• Husky and doberman energy at the same time

• NEVER let him figure out your birthday! If he does find out, prepare for a fuckton of gifts and a giant party!

• Someone tries flirting with you? Dead before the sun rises. Get kidnapped? He will burn lodon to the ground to find you.

• He's not a very touchy person but if you need it or are someone who needs attention/physical touch for conformation on things it flips like a switch!

• You can get a nightmare and he will pick you up, make you a plate of sweets, and let you sleep in his room so you aren't scared

• Find someone you want to marry or date? Think of a dad that will shoot your date if your not brought home the EXACT time he gave (If he approves of them, don't let your guard down. Just don't.)

• 10/10 one of the best fathers at the manor

Claude Faustus

• Alois always needs more maids (mainly because a lot of them quit) so once Claude heard about the new arrival, he didn't think you'd last a week!

• First thought? " I give them 4 day's. Let's see if they can keep up with the highness. "

• By the 4th week, he has deemed you his kid (Also because your the only one to fight his words)

• Compared to Sebastian, he gives you no time to prepare or even be comfortable with this

• You can fight him every step of the way and he will not back down (Alois walk in with you holding a knife to his throat once)

• When it FINALLY hits him across the face (Literally, you slapped him) about why your pissed at him he is the most apologetic man the world has seen

• It's takes 4 days before you finally give into him wanting to be your (With many flaws) dad. He makes alot of food to celebrate (with Alois knowing)

• He is, in no way, the best emotional support person! (I'm leaning more into the anime version of him) He's very emotionless so, if you can, help him!

• Like Sebastian, He knows about your mortality all too well. But by the GODS is he worse! You can't even be let past the garden sometimes!

• The amount of 'Touch them and die' energy he puts off, he has probably rid any chance at marriage you have.

• He is very protective of you, especially around Alois, and him seeing a single tear about to fall is enough to make him want to commit mass murder (Which HAS almost happened)

• Just doberman energy. That's all.

• Nightmares are not a issue! He's there while you fall asleep making sure you get a good night's rest

• Get hurt? He has the others take care of you while he finds the source of your hurt (If it's not human he'll fume over a fucking chair. A CHAIR.)

• He cooks for Alois yes, but if your hungry? " Alright, but you'll have to wait. " 30 minutes later he's made something along the lines of a thanksgiving feast.

• He's not big on birthdays. The best you get is a single present and a cupcake.

• He has scared off every suiter in site. If not, they have 0 to no chance at even dating you. (Secret relationship is a no go. He finds out one way or another.)

• I'd have to rate him 8/10

There you go lovely! I hope you like them, and feel free to add on to them as well! Hope you enjoy them and it is what you wanted!!!!!

[urbanxfantasy]

What’s currently going on with Toni and the gang?

So the thing is not a whole lot has been going on the past few months because Real Life happened to basically everyone in my discord group and we've been collectively busy, but I'm going to take this opportunity to summarise what's been going on for the past few years because people I haven't written with since 2016 are here again and explaining what's up with Toni now is an endeavour.

So:

(Tumblr I swear to all that is holy stop moving my read more)

2016-2018

2016 was a hell of a year for Toni. The absolute worst year of her life. Her adopted nephilim sons were murdered as part of infernal politics, Zeke vanished with his brothers in the wake of it, she herself was killed by Hanael due to actions taken to protect Lucida, and then Lucida herself was killed by a different demon anyway after expending her life debt bringing Toni back.

She doesn't do grief well. Can't sit in sadness. She got angry, because anger can save her when everything else is gone, and right then everything else was gone. She left New Orleans with one goal in mind; find a way to kill the demon who killed her children. At the time, she expected this goal to follow her into the afterlife.

At some point in her search for answers she came across Zeke, out on a depression bender after becoming disillusioned with his brother's quick rush into their next misadventure, but they parted ways again soon after.

2019

Toni met Mara (then possessing and going by Malcolm), the literal Whore of Babylon and queen of the NOLA crossroads, online and arranged a coffee date. Discovering that they rather enjoyed each other's company, the pair began to hang out more often. A few months later Toni made Mara her first birthday cake, and the demon's strong reaction to being shown basic kindness means they've been best friends ever since, even if Mara did insist on telling her that her body was "10/10, would posess"...

Ray, one of Mara's underlings and her current lieutenant, was assigned as Toni's bodyguard. Proving to be extremely food-motivated, he has since become Toni's roommate.

2020

Due to the pure coincidence of @concentratedbitterness picking a royal demon name out of a hat and landing on Andras: When Toni learnt that Marquis Andras, the instigator in her children's murder (and factor in much more of 2016's chaos besides) was causing problems for Mara in a bid to expand his own territory by snatching away the one she has worked tirelessly for centuries to make profitable, she sensed an opportunity for at least some petty revenge and threw what resources she had behind the pit demon. However, twists of politics and the revelation of personal secrets (first, that Toni is a former hunter and competent exorcist that the demon had neither suspected or guarded against, and second that Mara has a son whose creation was engineered by Hell to be a God Killer, who had not died during birth as she had lead Hell to believe but was in fact hidden away and being raised by his angelic father) forced more drastic action.

Mara needed to kill Andras.

Toni wanted Andras' death to be by her own hand.

Toni then asked Mara to possess her. Combining the demon's strength and power reserves with Toni's hunter background and research into the weaknesses of that one Marquis in particular, they brought the bastard down.

(In the intervening time, Malcolm, who Mara had intended to re-possess, was set free by Ray...)

Unfortunately, weakened in the aftermath of their victory, they were captured by other demons. This forced Mara's husband, the angelic father of her hidden son, to come out of hiding to rescue her, leading to his own capture by Heaven soon after. In a bid to protect his family, he agreed to take up his long dodged responsibility of overseeing the realm of Purgatory on the condition that they be allowed to come with him. Therefore, Mara (now in possession of a new, brain-dead host after Toni kept telepathically scaring off any conscious girl she tried to pick off the street) found herself dragged to Purgatory against her will, leaving Toni in possession of her earthly estate.

Around the same time, Malcolm, who had been taken on as an appentice by the long-time patron and distant relative of the Brockways, the warlock Santiago de Castilla, kidnapped Ray after rediscovering the notes of Santiago's former apprentice snd reignited an experiment begun on Ray several years earlier; a process to cleanse a demonic soul.

After a negative reaction to part of the experiment lead to Ray tearing off Malcolm's leg and escaping, Toni reconnected with her former roommate. Though her relationship to both parties was strained (with Ray for letting Malcolm go despite the risk he posed to Mara and herself, and with Malcolm for obvious reasons) she offered whatever assistance she could in seeing the experiment succeed, as in it she saw an opportunity to rescue her condemned-by-birth children, if something could only be done to retrieve their souls from Hell.

In the time between their rescue and Mara moving to a new host, Toni became aware through observing Mara and Hanael's private conversations by proxy that Han had begun a put rebellion in Hell which was taking full advantage of the chaos sewn by their assassination of Andras.

After a few months getting affairs in order, Toni and Mara are able to reconnect digitally if not in person. At the same time, Zeke quit his depression bender and reconnected with Toni. After being forced to confront both their grief and feeling for each other they became an official couple.

Toni also took on magic lessons with the fae queen Anna, in order to improve her glamour skills. They came to an understanding regarding Toni's part in her estranged husband's assassination.

With some nudging and woo-to-demon-speak translation work from Toni, Mara transitioned to drawing on Purgatory's energy source as opposed to Hell, suffering many of the same side effects as Ray was during Malcolm's experiment. Noticing the similarities, Toni encouraged the demon to allow information to be shared with her former adversary, helping the experiment with Ray along. Within a few months, Ray was shown to be successfully unbound from Hell.

2021

Toni then heard through the grapevine of supernatural contacts the Han's rebellion continued, but was struggling as the Crowns recovered from the earlier chaos. There lied the next opportunity; to secure her children's souls and take some manner of revenge on the royals who were complicit in their deaths all at once. With Mara's help she made a contract and braved a face to face meeting with Han to present it; all sensitive information gathered on the Crowns during years of overlooked observation and the location of Mara's remaining caches, in return for Han bringing her children along for the ride when he eventually made his run for the door.

While this took place, Mara was crowned Queen of Purgatory, and announced the annexation of the New Orleans territory during the official banquet. What seemed a petty and ill-considered move on its face was actually a calculated play in Toni's favour; resources spent on the territory dispute were resources not available to combat the rebellion or the rescue that relied on it. Meanwhile, New Orleans had been Mara's home base for centuries, with protections against such disputed built into the foundation. All they had to be was activated, and opposition was driven out over night, providing a secure territory for the escapees to retreat to. For security reasons, Toni's family was also moved inside the territory for their protection, revealing the supernatural to them in the process.

Purgatory also began taking in refugees from Hell, with the possibility of freeing them in the same manner as Ray.

Though not without complications, Toni's children were successfully retrieved from Hell, and brought to Purgatory for their own protection. Preparations began to adapt the experiment to their needs. Part of this experiment required drawing blood from the nephilim themselves. While Eli had stabilised and begun to recognise his mom enough to allow it, Asher, who had been much younger at his death and much further along in his demonization, pretended to allow it only long enough for Toni to get close enough to become dinner, then devoured the whole of her lower left arm before anyone could intervein. Devourement being somewhat irreparable, no healing magic would restore it.

Unfortunately, Mara had unintentionally become pregnant with a second god-killer. Heaven discovered this and came knocking at Purgatory's door, spurring Toni to make a deal with Anna for mutual protection of each other's children should trouble come knocking. Anna, learning of Toni's arm situation, offered a fae prosthetic, assuaging Toni's suspicion about the cost by declaring it payment for not going full scorched-earth in her revenge and preventing others from doing the same.

The pregnancy would almost kill Mara, if not for an instance of cross timeline time-travel. Mara's daughter 'Fig' (birth name Antonia), who had been forcibly taken as a ward of Heaven and trained to fulfil the role of the antichrist after it had been rejected by Mara's son in her own timeline, had rebelled against her teachers and jumped through time, seeking the familiar energy signature of Han and Audrey's own god-killer infant daughter. Han, after deducing who she was, attempted to introduce her to Mara in the hope that her power might allow her to rescue the demon from her lethal pregnancy. However, contact between this timeline's foetal Fig and the alternate timeline's adult Fig proved catastrophic, with adult Fig absorbing the very essence of the unborn child and irradiating Mara and her host. Mara re-possessed Toni with her permission and remained dormant within her through months of grief. Only Toni's need to move on with the experiment with her own children convinced the now not quite a demon to take a new host.

The experiment proved a success with Eli, but failed for Asher. Grieving her own child while still not having time to process and box away Mara's grief from the latest possession, Toni threw herself into her work of documenting everything they had achieved and learned.

And then she collapsed.

It turns out that being possessed by what she would later call a 'semi-divine entity' had left Toni with irreparable damage to her health, as Mara had changed her body over the course of her own recovery in order to draw in sufficient energy from Purgatory without knowing the long term consequences it would have for her friend, only to cut Toni off from that energy when she left. She now requires a higher calorie intake to avoid hypoglycaemic crashes, is medicated with a medicine Anna used to regulate her own energy when pregnant by Andras, and must moderate her magic usage to avoid knocking herself out.

Mara's husband also died around this time, leaving Mara as the sole regent yet unable to properly control the realm.

2022

Anna's realm suffered repeat incursions from Hell due to problems caused by the rebellion. When the Crowns refused to take action in accordance with the tithe treaties, Anna cut ties and declared war on Hell. Toni found out about this when the deal she had negotiated to protect her own children was called in by Anna to protect Labella.

With their refugees energy situation proving to be a struggle in an already unstable realm, Toni saw another opportunity and negotiated temporary access to the fae realm's energy in order for Malcolm to try a further experiment on former tithe slaves.

And then there was the bomb.

Hell had smuggled a bomb through agents posing as refugees into Purgatory and planted it at the wellspring of its energy, devastating the realm at large and nearly killing Mara, who ended up possessing Toni again for a brief moment before finding a new host to return and oversee the damage. Though claimed as an assassination attempt, it was a cover for Prince Stolas to steal the remains of the infant Fig in order to do further research into the god-killers.

In the aftermath and with some far less than gentle threats negotiation from Toni, Malcolm was convinced to start working with purgatory in order to solve the refugee energy crisis. To do so, Audrey and Ig tracked down the soul of Augusto de Castilla, Santiago's son, who had been burned at the stake as a result of a deal with Mara to rescue his father from the Spanish inquisition centuries ago. He was an expert in alchemy and time magic.

Also, Toni's little sister started dating Leroy Brockway, Malcolm's nephew. Due to this, she invited Lee's family including Santiago to her family's Christmas dinner. Where Eli, upon learning that Santago's familiar Magdalena had "the same name as Mr Augusto's", spilled the beans about Augusto which until that point had been kept from Santiago lest he do something dangerous.

In the damage control conversation Toni had with Santiago immediately after this, he revealed a book he'd been given supposedly by someone from the future. One of the authors was Antonia herself. She might have thought it was some kind of trick, if it hadn't contained finished paragraphs based on notes she had only just written and not yet shown anyone. It is a book she is already writing without realising, despite swearing to never write a boot on her experiences since Gabriel (the angel of prophets) suggested it to her years ago. She does not want to think about the implications.

It's worth noting that Mara has a blood-vendetta against the entire Brockway bloodline, so when Toni found out Lee had gotten Hannah pregnant, Toni shot him in the ass (she was aiming to kill him, but Hannah pushed her and threw her aim).

Current

Toni is trying to ignore that she's doing prophet things while edging ever closer to doing even more obviously prophet things.

There is an ongoing thread of Toni pointing a celestial-enchanted gun (that Han designed) at Han and telling him to stop threatening to kill her on a whim all the time.

Due to a series of unfortunate and very stupid events, Han crushed Malcolm's hands and no one has managed to convince him to come back to purgatory if and when he recovers yet.

Hannah's pregnancy is ongoing but the timeline has been intentionally blurred until we have time to nail down some key precursor plot points because there's a whole reincarnation thing in here somewhere.

------

Most of these plot points are expended on if you read the drabble tags:

Toni's Drabble Tag

and @concentratedbitterness: HERE

I don't know where anyone else involved keeps theirs.

[giraffefeather]

Hi, I'm drunk on wine and too deep in astrology, read more included as a courtesy.

Everything makes so much sense. Like I was one of the "Ooh astrology is so cool but totally not real" girlies, but uh...

Quick reference: I am pisces sun, gemini moon, aquarius rising. And right off the bat, I always notice before anyone else when I start talking too much (gemini stereotype) and always question if I'm being manipulative or not (hi again, bad side of gemini) but try so so hard not to (oh hey, there you are pisces). I can never pick a goddamn side in an argument (ahem, pisces? gemini? both known to see both or all sides). Meanwhile, I attract the "outcasts," for lack of better word - the people that don't always fit in (hello aquarius, ya weird little noodle).

Okay but then we have the VENUS. God, the amount of times I questioned if I was asexual, but then dated friends and thought no... thats not right... must be demi. And then I'll enjoy sex for a while, get really obsessed for like a week. but get bored of it and move on to something else. And I'm thinking... huh, is this autism? Adhd? Perhaps. But ALSO have you read up on venus in aquarius? That bastard is 100% on my love life.

Hi, quick disclaimer. I absolutely believe neurodivergency is something not assigned by the stars. It is a separate matter entirely. I am NOT diagnosed with anything, and although I have tendencies that align with both autism and adhd, it does not affect my daily life enough to seek diagnosis. I just think it's interesting that it may not be a true neurodivergency in my case, but just aligning with my signs.

I skipped mercury, hold up, that's aquarius too. It fits, but it's boring. Except the bit I read where they dislike schedules, especially if paired with a Pisces sun (hello, called me out).

And I was so mad that my Mars was in leo, thinking no no no, I can't have a Leo anywhere in my chart, that's not right! Bitch, it fits. All of it. 100% turn into a Leo when I'm angry. Other parts of Mars (motivation, sex, etc) seem to be muted by the rest of my signs, but anger? Aggression? Yikes, hello Leo loud intensity.

And I just think it's interesting that my least favorite sign (Capricorn... sorry, I just have met too many manipulative Caps) is also my Uranus and Neptune.

But back to my favorite sign (Aquarius!), I have 3 of those fuckers and I wonder if it's why I always love other Aquas. Or of it's just because my dad is an Aqua sun. But my mom is a Taurus sun and while I never thought I had attachment to the sign (I love my mom, I just see her flaws too), my best friend growing up was a Taurus, and that's the sign I can spot a mile away. Hell, I worked with someone who reminded me so much of my mom, that it didn't even surprise me when I found they shared a birthday. I wa just like oh... yeah that makes sense, you're basically the same person.

And following true Pisces comparability, I've been dating a Virgo for 7 years. Since day 1, I've been saying we're opposites but it works. And then find out that's one of the most recommended pairings for a Pisces sun for that exact reason. To balance each other out. And as Virgo is literally the only sign not to be found on my chart, i need that energy in my life. Funny, I always used to love libras before him. But isn't that just typical of libras - their allure? And I would kill for an Aqua friend, please someone come talk to me about conspiracies and cryptic!

I still need to delve into Jupiter and beyond, see if those actually fit. I'm starting to suspect they will.

But what if that's just my pisces dreaming, understanding every sign so that of course whatever I have fits? Then... do we question that I fit the pisces personality too? Or am I just a wishy-washy person, and believe everything?

Interesting that a simple Google search reveals so much about the signs too... and not even with the info available. I've found that there's so many hits if you search pisces, possibly more than any other sign. Gemini has plenty, too. But Leo? Sagittarius? A huge decline in results. And if looking at images on Google, its even more pronounced. Pisces and Gemini have so many artistic interpretations. Leo? I found like... 1 cool lion. Compared to the millions of fish and mermaid art with pisces.

[isca-tide]

6x08 aka I'm just steamrolling my way through these episodes tonight so I can get to the tiniest semblance of Tim and Lucy being a little bit okay Ugh. Monica. Why do they keep trying to make Monica such a thing. Seriously.

Ugh. Blair. So many ughs this season. I do wonder why he has so many alarms set for her birthday. Maybe he is just bad at technology. Or maybe he had something planned and didn't want to mess up any steps. Have I read too many fics where he had an engagement ring ready and waiting? Maybe. But also I suck a remembering birthday, even my own, so I don't find it that weird. Boy was in love, is still in love, and wanted to make sure he didn't forget his wife's special day. Uuuugh my heaaaart. Tim definitely sus about Blair though. Maybe he's not sure why, but he senses something is up. TO Lucy yes. Look, I've said it a million times and I'll say it a million more, Lucy would make an amazing TO. I don't want her to not be a detective, she'd make a great detective too, but unless the show gives her a golden ticket or Primm gets investigated, she's not getting there in the next two years. So why can't she be a TO in the meantime? She can still do UC as a TO, and it helps her advancement to detective or sergeant or whatever she wants to do. I know people are annoyed it's a recycled plotline from Nolan, but Nolan never even got close to being detective. He chose TO with his bloody magic golden ticket (even though, hello, Lucy has done just as much as him if not more and deserves that ticket 100% more but she'd never use it because she'd probably feel like she hasn't earned it because she's fucking amazing). Ahem. What I'm saying is, yes it sucks that she's not detective and she hasn't got stripes and she's constantly being overlooked and underappreciated despite everything she's done, but her being TO doesn't mean she stops there. It's still an advancement from P2, and I just think she's an amazing teacher. Moving on. Grey is adorable, such a good dad to his daughter after a few rocky episodes of not giving her the support she needs. Grey, yes. I approve. Her face is so adorable when he does the hand thing. Ugh, my heart. And yes, Tim, you need to fix it. You need to sit down and let Lucy talk to you. Hell, just let her talk at you. Let the woman talk. You owe her that. You might be working on yourself but you haven't given her a chance to do the same for herself. And yeah, sorry Tim. Again, this is the best you could've gotten out of all of this. Losing a bit of command sucks but you could've lost a lot more, job-wise anyway. Grey picking his daughter. Yes. I know he's known Tim for longer and he's seen him go through a lot and he knows he's going through a lot, but he also knows that Lucy had no choice in any of this. Lucy shouldn't have to be the one to lose her station along with everything else. So thank you for that, Grey. Lucy is sorely lacking anyone in her corner right now. Side note, is it St Stephen or St Stephen's? Because St Stephen sounds weird. I love how Lucy checks in with Celina before they start. Making sure she's not uncomfortable before they go ahead. God, she's such a good teacher and leader.

Tim, hey, some of us sweat. Deal with it. I would be a fucking puddle in that uniform in that van. I'd be deceased. I'm glad the whole Bailan pregnancy/baby storyline doesn't go on too long. At least from what I know it basically ends in 6x10 anyway. Unless they go adoption route? But it could've dragged on a lot longer, so at least we didn't get a whole season or two for it. What exactly is Luna's job? I'm not complaining but she's basically running the hospital now, right? And apparently the social care side of things? Patient admittance. I mean, she's good at it. Once again, Smitty. Outranks Lucy somehow. And Lucy looking after him because she's a literal angel. She's obviously been roughed up herself and she's just out there gently teaching Celina and protecting Smitty. No-one deserves her.

Tim's sad little smile when Aaron mentions the spa day he got her. He knows she'd love it. They probably would've gotten a couple's gift if they'd still been together. They could've been pampered. Had sexytimes at a fancy free hotel. Watched her be looked after and treated like the queen she is. Monica. UGH. Should we not be shutting down the hospital at this point to visitors? Because...well, this happens. Lucy and Celina, best team-up yes. Absolute queens. Everyone always says how good Nolan is at getting people to talk to him, but Lucy really does have such a way of getting through to people. Tim was right, her superpower is empathy. I get that it's sad for Tim to not be in control, especially when it comes to protecting men he used to lead, and is probably giving him all sorts of army flashbacks...but it just seems like they're putting all the focus on him losing Metro and missing that and literally nothing on him losing Lucy and missing her. Maybe they're mentioning it a little, and it's not something he'd be open with in front of most people so it's understandable he's not showing it much. I'd just like to see a few more moments. Show that it's hurting him as much as it's hurting her. Oh I would kill for some fics with Lucy seeing Tim all banged up and checking he's okay before leaving. Because she can't help herself. But also him seeing her all banged up and wanting to check on her but she brushes him off and leaves before he can. Blair, you're terrible at not being suspicious. Lucy instantly reaching to protect Bailey when they hear shots being fired. My absolute queen. Ugh. Monica. Sincerely fuck off. Does this hospital not have cameras in the hallways?! Ugh. Blair. Sorry Liz. Lucy Chen, literal sunshine. Oh god KOJO. BABY. Shouting at the screen for Lucy or Tim to go to each other but it's just way too soon. But oh my god the card and the pawprint. I do wonder if Tim might've been tempted to go see her if Mad Dog hadn't texted. Or god, can you imagine if Lucy gave in and went dow the hallway and he was already gone? Why does my mind crave angst so much? It can't handle it. My brain really is broken.

Oh Tim. Honey. God I just want Lucy to be there to help him. But it's not fair for her to be his only support system and she would be without question. But oh, Tim.

Can we please give these two just all the goodness in S7? Please? They've been through enough. Please.

[shadow-laviko]

Really, it will sound so dumb but I don't care I really, REALLY thank you both, Yomi and apoplecticgalaxy for wishing Shadow his birthday You guys have no idea how much it means to me Like, I'm usually glad that people wish me my birthday, but right now, I feel genuinely happy that Shadow's got "happy birthdays". Like, truly I can sleep peacefully knowing that he had two people care about him enough to wish him his birthday It feels like he threw a birthday party and nobody showed up, which was starting to genuinely break my heart (maybe because I haven't had a birthday party myself in well over 11 years... While I'm only 22 because nobody ever wants to come), but now that you two have showed up, I'm like "Yes!! My boy did NOT celebrate his birthday alone. He had people with him!! Yay!!" And like, you guys wishing him his birthday kinda makes him a tiny bit more real in a way? Like, people are acknoledging his existence? I mean, yeah, he doesn't exist, he's just a fictional character... But he fucking AGES every year, while all my other ocs are forever the same age (or until I update it) And like, he's almost like a best friend of sorts to me? I KNOW he's not real But You have no idea how real he is to me He is 22 today, but he's been in my mind for around 11 years (technically even more if you count the era when he was a girl) And And fuck, I feel like in whataver time space and universe you can imagine, as long as I would exist there, I'd have something in me that wants to create him. Like, fuck, he's not real but we have such a strong bond Something that's not even really explicable And, as I said in the comments of one of my posts, I'm usually called "Laviko" on social medias. But when my name is taken, you can be sure you'll find me by looking for both his name and mine. Like this Tumblr!! He's so important to me that his name comes first (which is good because it also sounds better this way).

Like, he is a part of me! And, yeah, all ocs (or most of them I think) are part of ourselves... But that's not what I mean. He's LITERALLY a part of me I just can't imagine my life without him Like, if I feel too shy or worried to do something, I'm like "Just imagine what Shadow would do in this situation" and it god damn helps! Hell, I'm not even sure I'd be here without him When I'm feeling sad and no one's there to reassure me, HE is there for me (sure, it's technically just me, but, you know, saying to yourself comforting words is just fucking sad... But if it's "someone else" it makes you feel better hearing it) Sometimes, if I have to buy things and can't decide between many options, I just go with what he would like! Because it helps Really. He's just a silly non existent guy (and it's not like an imaginary friend), but he means so much more to me... So, seeing people acknowledging him and wishing him his birthday makes me so so SO happy You have no idea

You made both the boy and me very happy

Thank you again so very much guys You two are awesome You're amazing, you rock

I love you guys Stay hydrated <3

PS : If you ever want more lore, I'd gladly offer But I don't expect it. I'm just saying

I'm really just grateful he wasn't alone for his birthday

My boy deserves love and affection So, thank you both a thousand times once again

<3

[clowncalvary]

Reading All of Garfield (Up Until This Point) The 1981 Post

So in a hilarious and delightful turn of events I have managed to circle back around to loving reading the Garfield comics again! I'm sure this won't develop into the ups and downs of binging Garfield or anything.

Anyway, read the Garfield Archive and join me!

I personally enjoy that Lyman was even an option for who ate Jon's sock. Is that something that he does often? I love that for the months that we do not see Lyman he is out here eating Jon's socks. Absolutely the worst roommate ever.

Look at that! The nap attack bit is back! We had this one last year and I did not enjoy is that much then either. But I'm trying to look at this with fresh eyes! Anywho, Garfield The Archivist.

OH GOD, IT'S HAPPENING, JON IS WEARING LYMAN'S SHIRT

Ooo, the linework has changed for this panel! It looks like from here on out Davis is using a different kind of pen!

I'm.... Do you usually put mayo on salads, Garfield?

Why living a boring life just to have a boring death? Enjoy your demise, Garfield~

That is just how an owner talks about their cat though, absolutely savage. Also this strip made me fuckin' gasp while laughing so it gets an A+ for that.

A literal reaction to some of these strips, I think I am in the flop era. Either that or I am just anticipating the mighty return of Lyman. I know he's out there somewhere!

I'm Sorry, Jon.

Okay, I take it back, no flop era, I love every comic with Nermal in it~

Now this is just god (Jim Davis) having a laugh at Garfield's expense! Also, I would hate mondays too if they involved having pianos dropped on me!

LYMAN IS BACK, WE LITERALLY HAD NOT SEEN HIM SINCE JAN, BUT HE IS HERE AGAIN JUST IN TIME FOR GARFIELD'S BIRTHDAY! Now back into the closet with him.

One of my felines would disagree! She loves the leash and harness because it means that she can go roll around in the dirt.

She used to date Lizzie Borden!? I'm not sure if this is an age joke, or honestly just a fun thought experiment.

Oh you just KNOW that, that cat food is going to taste terrible. Sorry, Garfield, you're too honest to act.

Honestly, me too, I can't keep a straight face through nasty food either.

So, first I had to look up what the heck an "apteryx" was; and then I had to look up why this comic would be funny. Shout out to this thread on reddit where someone was as puzzled as me.

I too would like to become a moose because my life has gotten too routine.

Love how ready he was for this bit, man positioned himself in front of that mirror and everything, he was ready to make sure she knew how pretty he is.

Jon really went and taught Garfield how to fetch, that is fucking adorable. Look how happy Garfield is about it too! This cat just needs to let himself enjoy life more often in a simple way!

In a different timeline this is where Jon died. I really should have been keeping track of how many times that happens.

Imagine putting a landmine in your cat's breakfast. I can't imagine that this was the kind of spice that Garfield was wanting with his breakfast.

WHY DOES HE LOOK SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS?! For everyone out there that does not have cats count yourself lucky that you have never had to deal with wet cat food. Bathing cannot save you from the smell of cat food in your hair.

After I finish reading all of these I have to check out a garfield family tree, poor Uncle Nick.

HOLD UP! 🫵

ENHANCE

ENHANCE

FREEZE FRAME! THERE ARE NO ANCHOVIES ON THAT PIZZA! THAT IS VERY CLEARLY A BURNT TO ALL HELL PEPPERONI!

I have beheld that struggle, most relatable Garfield comic to ever exist.

When I tell you my eyes got so wide. I want there to be a returning bit where Jon is forced to chase his own mice and gets one of these put on his chest in the night

A perfect place to end this year! On A Threat.