#Gil Family Wines

[softquietsteadylove]

“Today, every day, and on Valentine's Day, I will visit my wife of 56 years. We are separated by her dementia. I will tell her what's been going on outside, as I spoon-feed her in her care-home hospital bed. She says, "Thank you," when I tell her I love her. We both know she would say more, if only she could. We have had a great life together, ever since the second grade. She is slowly leaving, I know that. But we're a pair until then.” I saw this quote on NYT’s post about small acts of love, and I immediately thought of Thenamesh which made me think of you. I know this might be a sensitive topic so feel free to skip this as a prompt if you’re not comfortable, but I do think you could write something not only respectful but absolutely beautiful about this vein of love for our favorite pair. It reminds me of the Notebook too, if that’s at all inspiring! As always, love everything you give us <3

Far out in the Australian desert, there is a house.

It sits completely apart from everything around it. The land is tended to and the house is inhabited despite the arid nothing surrounding it. There is a water pump and an oven, a garden and space to keep goods.

Everyday, a man leaves the house. He leaves with a basket in hand, and he walks under the unforgiving sun. The trip is made in silence, walking for hours. He says nothing, stops for nothing. His journey takes him even further into the desert, further away from everyone and everything.

He walks until he sees a figure on a hill. The figure is all white from a distance, standing out against the sizzling red sands. It remains completely still. Most would even assume it doesn't breathe.

The man sets down the basket first, lowering himself next to the figure. Her hair picks up in the breeze, but he keeps it away from her face. Her eyes are as white as the dress on her back. When the weather turns bad he comes and stands over her, wraps a blanket around her shoulders.

He would fight off the lightning and thunder if he needed to.

He touches his hand to her cheek, to make sure she has warmth in her skin. He checks her eyes, which have not been green in years now. He checks to make sure she's still breathing, that time has stopped for her in a way that leaves her comfortable. He checks that she is still the Warrior Eternal, Thena, his wife.

The Strongest Eternal settles for the time being. He comes and sits with her everyday. Some days it's hours, some days it's only one. He has their home to attend to. He comes and tells her he misses her, what is happening back on their little patch of land. Tells her of the lizards she loved so much running through his garden.

The man pulls over the basket, pulling out some of the mead he has perfected over the years. There's no harm in letting her taste it, now. He pours it into a delicate sipping vessel and brings it to her lips. It is not as if she can expire of natural causes, out here. He can't either.

But he likes to come and share things with her. He's even started taking up her old practice of drawing, although he is certain she would tell him if they were as terrible as he thinks they are. Still, he brings them and shows them to her, one by one. Many are of her.

He eats something for himself, whatever he has made and brought with him. He still cooks because he enjoys it, even if there is no gentle humming at the table or smiles bathed in kitchen window sunlight. She always told him that her favourite part about his cooking was how happy it made him. She wouldn't want him to stop.

He points out clouds to her, asking what she thinks they look like. She would always just say weapons in the past, so now he makes up things like bunnies and monsters and even their family members, in a way. He asks her how they are sometimes, certain that she must be with them. Because he hopes that whatever happens within those completely white shrouds in her eyes, that she is happy, and safe.

He packs up the basket again, preparing to walk home. He tilts her chin towards him. Sometimes he can imagine her lips lifting ever so faintly. He can imagine the smile his wife always had for him. "Hey."

She does not reply.

"I'm heading home," he whispers sweetly to her, promising the next time he will feel most alive instead of the hours in between. "I'll see you tomorrow, sweetheart."

Her head tilts, leaning into his touch just a little more.

He smiles. Because sometimes she's in there--his Thena. He can see glimpses of her in times like these, when she leans into his touch, when her fingers twitch to hold onto him as much as she is able. There are traces of her still there, in the time he feels most alive.

He has no illusions, nor regrets. An Eternal has only the merciless and indefinite future to look forward to. He said they would take that chance, and they did, for almost a thousand years.

He's happy for these moments, and he can live with the hours in between. He leans forward and presses his lips to her forehead. She stopped blinking long ago but he swears he can see her eyes moving when he does this. "See you soon, Thena."

His hand slips from hers, and he sees that little twitch that makes him smile again. The first time he'd seen it, he had stayed for hours and hours afterwards. Now he knows he will see it again.

He walks back down the hill, looking back at her a few times just because he feels like it. She does not move. He knows she will be there tomorrow, and the next day. And if the earth shatters in half the day after then he will come and get her, and he will carry her to a place that is whole. He will carry her to the ends of the earth and sit with her when that end comes.

He would have nowhere else to be.

The man walks back, hours and hours again. The sun shifts in the sky and he makes it back before nightfall. With the dusk oncoming, he can see the light he always leaves on at the house. He follows the same path he walks everyday. He sets the basket down and walks out to check on the garden and the lizards. He makes sure his apron is hung up and his dishes are clean.

He goes to their room, lies down in their bed, and he thinks about his wife. He falls asleep with his hand on her pillow, thinking of her hair trailing onto his shoulder, of her soft breathing and her laughter. And tomorrow, he will go and see her again.

Far out in the Australian desert, there is a home.

It is the home of two Eternals, a husband and wife. They travelled the world together, even saved it, in a way. It was always known that she would leave before him, and they took that chance. They built an entire life out in the arid desert, out surrounded by the sand, surrounded by the sea.

Their home is built at the ends of the earth, and the wife resides further into the nothingness still. And her husband walks to see her, every single day.

[elswing]

rings of power modern au where gil galad is the exasperated wine mum who runs lindon's middle school pta like the navy and gets wine drunk in the afternoons to cope with the stress of having to wrangle the two hundred kids in his care but also his conspiracy theorist aunt who crashes on his couch for weeks at a time and scares his house callers by ranting about how the end of days is nigh upon them. there's only so many times he can be polite when asking her to keep the noise down so elrond can focus on his chemistry homework but he knows he can't afford to piss her off because technically the house went to her in great granddaddy finarfin's will so he has to stick to passive aggressive comments for now.

círdan is the eccentric old relative that lives in a self-sustaining farm in the middle of asscrack nowhere and no one can quite figure out how he's related to them (he's actually not, they left the backdoor open during the annual barbeque a few years back and he sort of just wandered in. their family is so big and confusing nobody thought to question it and at first he kept coming back for the tuna casserole in hopes of recreating the secret recipe but he had a heart to heart with gil's weird foster son and now he's really invested in the family drama). he's normally completely unreachable but he DOES have a sixth sense for detecting nuclear fallout so you know if he's rolling up to the family function it's going to be eventful, like the time cousin arondir accidentally brought his and bronwyn's special brownies instead of the ordinary ones or when uncle celebrimbor showed up with galadriel's ex twink who inexplicably now looks exactly like the husband who just stopped showing up one day and nobody ever worked up the nerve to ask what happened to him. everyone just assumed divorce but gil isn't entirely convinced she didn't murder him

[markantonys]

arondir brings the marriage alliance with humans. elrond brings the marriage alliance with dwarves. galadriel brings the marriage alliance with orcs. gil-galad brings the wine to family dinners because he is stressed out by all his weird in-laws.

[gallifreyinstituteforlearning]

Looming vs. Natural Reproduction - what on Gallifrey's going on here?

aka What is looming and how does it exist alongside natural reproduction?

As the first of the trending topics, GIL's noticed some confusion about the concept of looming vs. natural reproduction in Gallifreyans. Have no fear; GIL's here to help.

🧬 What is looming?

It's a bit like 3D printing, but for people. These Rassilon-created Genetic Loom Breeding-Engines weave new Gallifreyans from a mix of matter and biodata. Looms produce Gallifreyans of all genders, (though females are loomed slightly less frequently). Each House has its unique Loom, which embeds familial traits into its creations.

❓ Why is looming a thing?

The invention of Looms was Rassilon’s grand solution to a serious problem. Following the catastrophic Curse of Pythia, Gallifrey faced extinction. The Looms became lifelines, ensuring the continuity of Gallifreyan civilisation.

🔮 What is the Curse of Pythia?

The Pythias were a kind of magical matriarchal monarchy, with rulers known as Pythias ruling over ancient Gallifrey in succession. Pythia number 309 (out of 309) was elbowed out by Rassilon. She was, understandably, really hacked off. She condemned Gallifrey to wither and then threw herself into the Crevasse of Memories That Will Be, never to be seen again. This 'withering' is known as the 'Curse of Pythia'. It resulted in mass sterility of Gallifreyans - supposedly instantly killing babies in their mother's wombs, and preventing any Gallifreyan from reproducing naturally from that point forward.

🍷 So Gallifreyans used to reproduce naturally?

Yes. Before the sterility curse, Gallifreyans reproduced just like humans, with a little wine, a candlelit dinner and maybe an album by Barry White.

✨ So does this 'Curse' still exist?

No. The apparent lifting of Pythia's curse was marked by Leela's pregnancy (yes, THAT Leela), which hailed a return to natural reproduction among Gallifreyans. Others besides Leela have also been able to reproduce naturally.

🔄 So what method do they use?

This blend of technological and biological means of reproduction leaves Gallifreyans in a unique position. They could use both methods depending on social, political, or personal factors.

🧐It can't all be that simple, GIL ...

Wow, you've been here before, haven't you?

There are accounts that the supposed 'Curse of Pythia' didn't actually come from Pythia.

Self-inflicted: Some say it was a side-effect of a massive time tech experiment that went awry.

It never existed: Others suggest there never was a curse. Rassilon, seeking absolute control, concocted a narrative to enforce a sterile, controllable society, eradicating the unpredictability of natural birth and driving forward eugenics in his perfect society.

🏫 So ...

Thus, the plot thickens. Were Gallifreyans always capable of natural reproduction but held back by societal constructs and fear? Did Leela's pregnancy unveil a truth long buried or simply reawaken a dormant biological ability? That's up to you.

But of course, GIL denies this version of events, cos how else would we get the funding for all the biscuits in the canteen from the High Council? Praise Rassilon!

Related:

💬|🧶💰How to acquire a Loom?: Practical guide to acquiring a loom, legally or not.

📺|🏡🧬Top 10 list of the most biologically curious Houses of Gallifrey

💬|👤👑Why is Rassilon everywhere?: Who Rassilon is and why you should care.

Hope that helped! 😃

Any purple text is educated guesswork or theoretical. More content ... →📫Got a question? | 📚Complete list of Q+A and factoids →😆Jokes |🩻Biology |🗨️Language |🕰️Throwbacks |🤓Facts →🫀Gallifreyan Anatomy and Physiology Guide (pending) →⚕️Gallifreyan Emergency Medicine Guides →📝Source list (WIP) →📜Masterpost If you're finding your happy place in this part of the internet, feel free to buy a coffee to help keep our exhausted human conscious. She works full-time in medicine and is so very tired😴

[tanoraqui]

Lalwen caught everyone's attention by slamming a fresh wine bottle onto the center of the table.

"Alright, new game," she said. "'The Worst Thing I Ever Did To You Was...' It's like The Worst Thing I Ever Did, but it has to be specifically to someone else in this room, and you have to apologize for it. And you only get to drink if everyone else agrees that your apology was good enough."

Fingolfin raised one finger. "Point of order: what if you need to be drunker in order to apologize for something?" He didn't look at Fëanor, but his gaze was sliding around a bit, so in order to achieve this, he turned his entire head to the right.

"Tough luck," said Lalwen.

"Point of order," said Findis. "What if we don't want to play this one, either?"

"Then you have to sit here and endure it without getting to drink any more. Because - " Lalwen forestalled Fëanor's imminent query - "the door is still locked and no one is leaving until Family Game Night is over."

The boys all radiated rebellious pedantry, probably still not over how she'd lied to get them all here. But they didn't say anything, so Lalwen smiled brightly and said, "Great! I'll do an example to show you how it's done."

She retook her own chair, wobbling only a little as she moved from standing to sitting, leaned toward her youngest brother and said earnestly, "Ara, I'm sorry that I lied to you that Gil-galad was Fingon's son and your foster-great-grandson. It was politically expedient but essentially an orc move, and mostly I just did it because I was bitter at you for swanning in with all your golden armor and righteousness and optimism, when we had none of any of that. That was wrong of me. Also, obviously it fell apart as soon as he and his parents were all re-embodied."

Fëanor still had half a glass of wine from the now-lost bottle. He'd started slipping it slowly while glaring pointedly at Lalwen, to prove that he didn't need her stupid game.

He nearly spit it out.

"That's why a random half-blood became High King of the Noldor?" he demanded. "You just lied that he was part of the House of Finwë? And nobody challenged it?"

Lalwen was laughing too hard to answer. Findis was also laughing, more quietly.

"To be fair," Fingolfin offered, swallowing his own snicker in favor of loftiness, "from what the elf himself has told me, at the start of the Second Age, Galadriel, Elrond, and Celebrimbor between them could have crowned an unwoken tree High King if they'd all agreed on a candidate. Support from each of our lines, you know."

"Fëanor, how did you think Gil-galad became High King?" Finarfin asked curiously.

"I hadn't thought about it much - I've been busy, you know. I suppose I assumed he'd been elected, as we do now."

Fëanor tipped his head back to drain his glass, then rather slammed it down on the table. Yet again, the jewel-grade goblets proved themselves the right choice for the evening.

Lalwen could barely breathe for laughing. "No Noldor on either side of the Sea did that until nearly the end of the Second Age!"

Fëanor scowled.

Findis smiled serenely, and twisted the top off the new wine bottle. A melodious scent swelled forth of sweet grapes, bruised peaches, and warm summer sun.

"Well, that seems well-apologized to me." She refilled Lalwen's glass - though she paused before handing it back, and asked, "Ara?"

Finarfin nodded grandly, and for good measure took Lalwen's hand and kissed it. "We are well-reconciled, sister, and have been for many years."

"Good, good, gimme!" said Lalwen, grabbing at her well-deserved wine. "Ahh..." The Yavannandil wine was soft and soothing against her laughter-dried throat.

When she'd downed a good third of the glass, she gestured broadly and declared, "There! You see how it's done! Your turn!"

She pointed to Fëanor, then jabbed her finger at his chest. "And you're not allowed to say 'burning the ships', that's too easy."

[iwannakisskissyoureyesagain]

some self-indulgent monster high headcanons

draculaura was clawdeen’s sexual awakening

but since drac and clawd are in a committed relationship, clawdeen never interfered. instead, she made out with toralei at a party once, and the two of them made it official about two months later (let’s go lesbians)

howleen bought twyla noise-canceling headphones and made her fidget bracelets for her birthday

with cleo dating frankie and nefara dating clawdia, they’re both the royal family disappointments, which has strengthened their bond since they each came out (i.e. since cleo came out to nefara, who just brought clawdia home for dinner one night)

literally none of the wolf siblings are straight

draculaura would drink blood to get melanie martinez tickets the second she learns about normie music

no one speaks to gil anymore. especially not lagoona

venus and howleen have both been taken home in a cop car multiple times for public protests

toralei, meowlody, and purrsephone expand their band to include clawdeen and frankie. their music is inspired by a mix of paramore, stela cole, and chappell roan (plz i need to see toralei do a cover of “red wine supernova”)

frankie went to howleen so she could help them figure out their identity. since then, she’s become their go-to source for other important life questions, such as, “is a hot dog really a dog” or, “how do you use a microwave please i can’t burn down cleo’s kitchen”

deuce dresses like he goes to fashion school. i’m talking crop tops and low-waisted skirts or jeans, platform boots, baggy pants, and more accessories than you can count. a bi icon. clawdeen uses him as her model for her masculine-bodied designs

heath has adhd (i would say heath-twyla-neurodivergent solidarity, but she’d actually combust if she had to spend 20 minutes with him the poor girl)

[samrut]

"Rabit will run" by iron and wine, gerpru or ger&pru?

GerPru [Hitman/Missed Target AU]

Gilbert is a hitman. Despite only recently becoming an adult, he has killed many people indiscriminately. He is hired to eliminate a family of aristocrats. 

He manages to get employed as his target's bodyguard and works for them, waiting for the right moment to carry out the assassination. However, one of his targets is a child named Ludwig, which complicates things. Ludwig is a smart, sweet, and eager boy who admires Gilbert, and they become close.

When the opportunity arises to kill the family, Gil successfully assassinates all of them, except for Ludwig. He does not have the heart to finish him off. Instead, he kidnaps him and leaves him at an orphanage in a small village far from the big city.

The poison Gilbert used as a sedative in the failed assassination, as well as the trauma from the ordeal, have affected Ludwig's memory. Ludwig is unable to recall his past or the identities of his parents; he only remembers their brutal murder, which he witnessed. He grows up using a different name, and when he comes of age, he moves to the city to make something of himself.

Ludwig is quite naive, and some ruffians attempt to steal what little money he has, but a stranger interferes and scares them off. After the attempted robbery, Ludwig thanks the man who had helped him.

This man happens to be Gilbert, and upon seeing Ludwig, he immediately recognizes him as the target he let live.

However, Ludwig does not recognize him and offers to buy Gilbert a drink. Although Gil should refuse the offer, he can not say no to those beautiful, bright-blue eyes and charming smile. 

[tallshipsandtallkings]

❝ the ball is quite nice. i haven’t danced in so long. ❞ for Elenna <3

"Because you happen to possess two left feet, Your Majesty," Elenna teased, a half smile dancing on her lips. She swayed gently at the tune, one hand on Gil-Galad's, another on his shoulder, nice and proper. She was not unaware of the many eyes that were on them, and kept the polite distance from their most honored guest.

Annúminas was only barely beginning to tale shape when Elendil decided a few days of celebrations were in order. The main palace was not yet entirely furnished; guest quarters were hastily put together for the High King and his entourage, but the main celebration of the summer solstice took place outside, in the main square. Tables were placed under canopies, heavy with finger foods, wine and rhum. There would be no ritual atop the Meneltarma, no prayer offered to Eru in a hallowed place. But there would be plenty of song to honor their lost homeland, and even more dancing. The party would last until dawn, and all the citizens would be exempt from their duties until the following day.

Elenna missed her brothers dearly. They had scarcely spent any solstice -Erulaitalë, as it was known in Númenor- apart. It was less familiar than the Eruhantalë or the harvest festival, but she could always count on them for some mischief. Now Isildur and Anárion were preoccupied with their own realm, aside from their own families, and they could not spare time to travel north for a party.

She turned to her companion, his proximity already easing some of her longing for her brothers from her heart. He filled it with an entirely different type of yearning, but Elenna was not ready to face that new reality just yet.

"I trust you are having a good time, then?"

[panthera-tigris-venenata]

What is their go-to drink order?

First of, let's assume everyone is of legal drinking age, whatever that might be.

It's sixteen. If Ben can be a High King at sixteen, he can bloody well drink. I'm not taking criticism on that one.

Unsurprisingly though, Ben has never had as much as a champagne.

And Jane is stuck drinking kiddie fake-champagnes well into her twenties.

Now Audrey? Oh well. Her favourite is rosè, champagne, Skinny Bitch (vodka & soda) and Pink Gin & Tonic. If you pick an aesthetic, you bloody commit to it.

If she's doing shots with the pirates, she gets vodka, because Audrey post Queen of Mean is that bitch and fears no god. She could also do silver tequila.

Chad can't hold his liquor. He just can't. He has one (1) cider//Frisko and is crying. Audrey is suffering.

Anthony Tremaine gets some fancy brandy or whiskey on rocks. Again, Aesthetic, duh. Once he got this for Ginny Gothel and died a little inside when she declared that it doesn't taste any good and proceeded to pour Cola into it. Guess who learned to never ever do this the hard way.

Harriet Hook. Uuh. She has Problems. We know that, right?

On the Isle, she usually drinks Energy drinks with vodka, because she needs to stay awake, duh. Also rum, 'cos pirates, and red wine, 'cos Aesthetic.

If it's before noon, she gets a Mimosa, so she can feel fancy. Also espresso with vodka. Gin & Tonic.

Basically, you name it, chances are Harriet Hook has drunk it at least once.

She'd just like to forget and not feel, savvy??

Harry prefers rum and dislikes wine. He just has the vibes. Unless it's mulled wine which smells way better.

Uma also orders rum. She, however, really likes Pina Colada, but she won't order it herself, (because tough pirate Captain can't enjoy sugary long drinks, duh).

Don't worry though, Gil gets it for her every time he is getting them drinks.

Uma also doesn't pay for her own drinks, like, ever.

Gil likes ciders the best, even over beer, for which his father and brothers ridicule him. He doesn't care, though. He will also do shots of rum with the rest of the pirates.

CJ doesn't drink.

She has seen her family's hungovers and decided she is not doing thaz, thank you. She also dislikes the idea of losing the already poor control over her mind any more. It might not look like it, but CJ is a bit of a control freak.

Freddie Facilier drinks only when someone buys the drink for her. In which case, she'd choose a Chupito, a sweet shot with rum, lime liquor and cocktail cherry.

Celia Facilier doesn't drink and good for her.

Dizzy Tremaine is not allowed to drink. She doesn't particularly wish to, though.

Ginny Gothel mostly drinks wine, and if there is more fancy option available, she'll get Calvados (fancy apple liquor. It's good.) She is also not opposed to drinking Harriet's Red Bull with vodka though.

Claudine Frollo (once adopted by the Hooks). She also has problems, which, in this case, manifests as getting her drinks as vile as possible.

Campari Orange, as bitter as her soul. She can also pass it for an orange juice if she wanted. She's a hypocrite. (Campari Orange is legit good though). On similar note, Skinny Bitch, without the lime. She will do shots of pure vodka and drink Slammed-Tequila (shot of Tequila & shot of Sprite & ice), which is the most vile substance I have ever tasted. It feels like kerosene.

...Mal can't drink. I'm not taking criticism on that.

Evie and Carlos can do shots of pure vodka. Evie likes champagne more, though. She also has a vendetta against red wine, which was her mother's drink of choice, because it looks like blood, duh. Oh, and Aperol Spritz! (She and Audrey should be allowed to gossip and/or plan murder over a glass of Aperol. Ginny too. They'd vibe.)

Technically, Jay and Jade aren't allowed to drink for their own safety. Not because they'd drink too much, but because they insist on taking their usual Anything-but-the-pavement route no matter what.

One time, after some shots of Tequila, they convinced Audrey to go with them. She almost broke her neck, which might be because she refused to take off her high heels.

[chioneeirwen]

The Search...

Chione had spent days trying to find a contract to hire. And still, no one bit the bait. Groaning, she threw the files of these missing men on her desk, littering the already disorganized mess she made. 

“Ugh… I’m just about to look for these damned fools myself. How has NO ONE taken the bait for gil? It seems like no one cares about workers anymore. Especially if they’re not wealthy, with gold lining their pockets.” Chione spat in annoyance. She was clueless about what to do next. And, of course, since she earned the rank of Lieutenant at the Barracks, everyone was too afraid of her to even speak to her. Another sigh left her lips as she pushed away from her desk, her back hitting the cushioned seat behind her. Her arm bent, and her forefinger and middle finger rested at her temple to ease the pressure that was building behind her eyes from reading too much in such piss-poor lighting. Eventually, she stood and picked up the papers and put them back in a neat pile before placing them back into their folder and putting them in the safe that was embedded into the stone wall behind her desk. Clearing her desk completely, she sighed before approaching a small servant’s cart, taking a wine glass, flipping it over, and pouring crimson liquid into the container. She returned to her office chair, her mind clouded by those people who went missing. 

“Twelve hear me… Please let these people be safe…” Chione whispered to the cold air, earning silence as her response. She relaxed, practically melting into the seat, taking a drink from the wine glass. Another sigh left her nostrils. Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t hear a rap at her door before hearing the hinges squeak. Looking up, she sees she’s met with her maid, Teagan. “Oh, Teagan! I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you knock. Please come in,” Chione invited with a pleasant smile. Teagan returned her smile and entered Chione’s chambers fully, the room feeling homey and clean. 

“What can I do for you this evening, Teagan? It is rather late, and I figured you and the rest of the household would be asleep by now,” Chione said, straightening in her seat and trying to remain proper in front of her attendant. 

“I’m sorry for the late intrusion, Milady,” Teagan began, bowing swiftly in greeting. 

“No need to apologize! Is something amiss?” Teagan pulled a missive from her coat and handed it to Chione. “I think someone answered your bounty, milady…” Chione stood from her leather-cushioned armchair, and gently took the letter from Teagan’s grasp and used a small blade to open the parchment. Inside was indeed a response, but the name was unfamiliar to her. Chione looked back up at her maid, who was lightly playing with her fingers.

“Thank you for delivering this to me, Teag… Did someone give this to you, or was it dropped off?” She questioned as she placed the missive back on her desk. The maid shook her head, “I didn’t see anyone when I heard the knock on the door. I came down the stairs from my bed chambers, walked to the door, and saw this missive jammed in the door frame. It looked like whoever responded didn’t want to be seen or spoken to. I opened the front door and looked around but didn’t see anyone.” 

Chione sat back in her chair and pondered, her fingers touching her palm, her thumb and forefinger resting against her chin. After sitting there silently, Teagan clears her throat and pulls the Lady out of thought. “A-Also, Milady, I wanted to congratulate you on your promotion to Lieutenant. You are more than deserving of this promotion and its power.” Teagan said with a simpered smile. Chione looks up at her and responds with a smile. “Thank you, Teagan. Your kindness is appreciated.” She finishes with a grin. 

The tall elezen man stood in a dark alleyway of a noble home he’d known since he could walk on his own two feet. Their families history running long and deep that their parents pushed for the young woman and man to become quick friends and possibly mates. However, at a young age, Hex found himself annoyed of the young girl and was quick to push her to the ground and pull at her hair in passing. 

Even in Sharlayan he continued to be her bully, but that one fateful Starlight Celebration and he was without a family to celebrate with, he found Chione standing amongst others before inserting himself. The years hadn’t been kind between them, but for that celebration she was his salvation. Since then, he’s held a certain soft spot when it came to her, but of course he wouldn’t admit it. 

Now that he’d seen her missive, searching for her men, he found himself answering her call while standing silently in the shadows of the dark cold night. Silently cursing himself on his decision to answer, he was close to leaving when he saw her window light still on that he found himself scaling the walls and up the window where he’d find himself perched all those years before. 

Hex listened to the conversation and waited for the maid to leave. When she did, he reached for the window to see if she left it unlocked like she did before, and to his surprise, it was open. Pushing it open slowly, he stepped through the window frame, his soft leather padding of his boot hitting the floorboards bringing in a slight chill to the otherwise warm room. 

“Long time no see, kitten.” Hex spoke in a soft and low baritone. 

“Sleep well, Teag… I’ll see you bright and early in the morning,” Chione said, a warm smile tugging her lips. Teagan bowed graciously. “Goodnight, Milady.” 

Chione nodded, and Teagan left. Hearing the hinges creak to a close, Chione let out a sigh she didn’t know she was holding in. Soon, she felt a draft and a slight shiver ran up her spine. Standing from her seat, she pulled her linen robe around her torso and slid her slippers back onto her feet before walking towards her window when that all too familiar voice echoed into her ears again. Looking at her window, she saw the tall Elezen man lean against the wall beside the now-closed pane.

“Silas…” Chione gaped in surprise, feeling a little revealing in front of the man she hadn’t seen in almost a decade. The memories of her bully becoming her lover in an all too quick time, just for it all to wash away. And now the man she thought she’d never see again was standing in front of her with an all too familiar smirk, and the bass in his voice sent a chill up her spine. “What are you doing here?” Chione questioned as she pulled her garments closer to her body. 

“It appears you got my missive.” Silas pushed himself from the window pane and walked towards her slowly. For someone who hated the cold he definitely wasn’t dressed for a cold winter night in Coerthas. Home to his father, Chione and himself, once upon a time. 

“And it appears congratulations are in order, Lieutenant.” Silas said lowering himself to meet her gaze with a slight tilt to his head and a smirk on his lips. He wore nothing but a leather jacket, pants, and a thin pair of gloves. Silas pulled one glove from his hand, and if allowed he’d reach over to line his fingers against the lapels of her linen robe. 

Silas kept his eyes on where his hand was placed before he slowly retracted and raised that same hand to brush his grey hair back. His red unusual eyes glistened in the soft light when he turned his gaze back down to her. 

“Your bounty,” Silas started off by saying and giving a brief pause. “You’re losing men and no one is willing to search for them?” He asked going straight to business to distract himself from his wandering mind. 

His mind kept going back to their brief romance. How stupidly infatuated with her but his own mistake causing them to argue and ultimately ending their romance. Again Silas removed his gaze to distract himself further, allowing her the time to give more information on the men she’d lost and about the bounty itself. 

Chione’s eyes glared slightly at the male in front of her as he told her about the anonymous letter. Her breath hitched in her throat as he reached to touch her, but only pinching the folds of the collar on her robe, her nerves shot. Feeling the warmth from his fingers behind the only layer of clothing between them, she began to get butterflies in the pit of her stomach. Watching him as he pulled his hand away to brush the soft hair she once used to play with out of his face.

“Thank you,” Chione responded quickly, hearing him congratulate her on her promotion. “But you’re the one who responded to my message? Why would you want to help me? I thought you had other things to worry about,” she said, trying to sound dismissive toward the man. She returned to her desk and grabbed her wine, which she took a rather large drink from—another sigh leaving her small frame. 

“I haven’t seen or heard from you in over a decade, and THIS is how you choose to rekindle the friendship? A silly message response?” Chione said with a tinge of sadness as she turned back to look at Silas, her baby blues piercing his crimson eyes. Sighing, she rolled her eyes and returned to her desk chair, sitting down, her hands resting over her face. The blonde-haired woman was shocked. She couldn’t even describe her feelings as Silas stood in her bed chambers. 

“What you can say, kitten is thank you, Silas for helping me.” He followed after her, his boots loose of any snow that had stuck to the soles, now leaving wet traces in his wake. 

Silas stopped as she poured herself some wine and sighed as she returned to her desk chair. A sight to behold. He told himself. And once again he was cursing his mind for how quick it was to wander to their shared past. 

Instead of arguing with her, at least for that moment he leaned down and tilted her chin up with his thumb and index finger. “Allow me to start over.” Silas whispered. 

“Hello, Chione, it’s been a while, did you miss me, my kitten?” His voice lowered now that he was face to face with her. 

Chione’s breath hitched in her throat. Hearing him tease her over her reaction to him showing up at her home in Coerthas, where the weather was harsh and extremely cold, the blonde-haired woman looked up slightly, seeing him approach her massive desk. Hearing his words, she put her head down again, still shocked about him showing up. Chione suddenly felt soft, yet cool skin touch her face before her head moved slightly to look up at the tall man. His words were like a song, sending palpitating beats through her heart. Her blue orbs watered slightly. 

“Of course I missed you… You left me alone after I found you with a girl who absolutely despised me. You cheated on me, then degraded me to your friends while the same bitch was on your arm like a trophy… And here I am, feeling conflicted because you want to apologize.” She paused, the water in her eyes causing her vision to blur. “And you want to ‘start over?’ What am I supposed to think? How am I supposed to feel?” Chione whispered, pulling her face away from his digits. Standing up, she finished her glass and placed it on the dark oak desk—a heavy sigh leaving her body. 

“How many times are you going to put me through the mental stress..?” Chione whispers, turning to look up at Silas. Hurt evident in her facial features. 

            “I would've killed for you to love me, but it was always me getting bullied instead. Or you yanking on my hair and shoving me… Whereas, I would and always did bend over backwards for you and put you on such a high pedestal…” Chione spoke softly, her emotions getting to her.

Silas was never overly confident when it came to Chione. As a child he’d argue that he couldn’t stand her because their families placed too much expectation on them to be friends and later mates if they chose to do so. He hated how much he loved the colour of her eyes, almost muttering under his breath that he could drown in them, of course never loud enough for her to hear, perhaps except the one time he said it out loud. While they welled up with water, he wanted to wipe them away but before he could, she had already turned her head away from him. 

Chione always knew how to pull herself away from him, protecting not only herself but her heart too. And there was little reason why she should trust him when all he’d done was hurt her. Whether it was physical or even mentally. Silas was hardly the good man his family hoped he’d be. Her words were like different knives, stabbing into him. Each word true. He did wrap his arms around a girl, but the cheating, he took no part in. Truth be told, he teased the girl relentlessly in a bid to see who could get her more interested in him only to reject her later. Silas stooped low when she brought up Chione. The girl hated her for some unknown reason and likely took in the fact that he too used to feel the same.

A silly game he and his friends played but never wanted to when it came to Chione. But she wouldn’t believe him, not after this long. It’s been a decade since. While she got up to stand, his shoulder brushed against hers and he stayed leaning forward while reflecting on his past actions. 

“You know I never wanted to hurt you.” His voice low and sorrowful. “Not in that way, but you wouldn’t understand.” Silas finally stood and turned to face her. His ungloved hand reaching out for her again but this time he stopped himself from touching her. 

Silas’ hand fell to his side, his fingers lightly tapping against his leg like he used to do as a child whenever he was lost in thought. He couldn’t exactly tell her that he wanted to be everything he wasn’t, for her. To be worthy of her affections and partner. But just like before, he was stopping himself from telling her more than he had to. 

“I didn’t come here to bring you duress, I saw your bounty and wanted to help. As a member of the Kane family, even… unofficially and even if I’d been disowned, I can still help.” Silas deflected. “Our families as far as I know still have some sort of relationship.”

When Silas left the first time and after hurting Chione, he argued with his father that sent waves of shock throughout the noble house as well as the rest of Ishgard. Not only did his father disown him, but Silas was no where to be seen. He’d heard that the house was in chaos, a promise of marriage and proposal rumours circulated but with Silas gone and Silas Sr’s lips tight. The rumours became baseless and the house carried on as usual, just without the sole heir. 

“If you wish for me to leave, then I can go. Is me being here worth that to you?” Silas inquired, this time looking into her eyes. His fingers still tapping lightly at his leg. 

Chione turned to face Silas again, her eyes still full of tears and her lip quivered slightly.

“No, I don’t want you to leave. But hearing you say you never wanted to hurt me and that I don’t understand? What do I not understand? What you did was awful… Tell me to my face that you didn’t cheat on me. That’s all everyone spoke about after we broke up.” Chione said, the hurt in her features evident. She approached Silas with vigor, her feet still silent against the floorboards, taking his hand to stop his tapping, knowing that was a habit he’d had since she had known him. Looking up at his features, she couldn’t help but think about their past together. How he used to push her around, pull her braid, and or made her feel inferior. Her blonde waves cloaked her shoulders as her long curtain-like bangs framed her face. Her baby blues burning holes into the right side of his face, pleading silently to look at her. 

“I appreciate you wanting to help me… I’m sorry for not expressing my gratitude. I just—you weren’t the person I was expecting to answer my missive about my workers going missing. Baurendouin barely gave me anything to go off on besides them not showing up to work.” Chione said, a sigh leaving her as she rested her head against his shoulder. His smell was calming to her, his presence feeling like home to her, too. 

“The bounty price is 400k in gil. Thank you for lending me your help. If you’d like, I can come with you, so you don’t freeze to death.” She said quietly, a slight giggle leaving her lips. “Cause we all know how much you hate the cold.” 

“You didn’t answer me, is me being here worth that mental stress to you?” Silas asked feeling her warm hand take his. His hand moved instinctively and his fingers were soon wrapped around hers. 

Silas gently lifted her arm and placed her hand against his cold cheek before softly kissing it and moving his lips down to her wrist. His free hand wrapped around her waist loosely while he gazed down at her. He couldn’t help but think of how much shorter she was than him. When they first started to hang out he’d rest his arm on the top of her head before wrapping it over her shoulders. 

“I didn’t cheat on you Chione, my kitten. Not once. Not ever. It was a stupid game.” His brows furrowed as he closed his eyes. Muttering the same words of it only being a game. “I agreed to set her up with the boys. Make her trust me, make her… fall for me, before I blindsided her and my friends with our relationship.” Silas whispered kissing her wrist again with his cold lips. 

Finally, Silas opened his eyes and he looked down at her again. Her tone was light but serious as she explained what Baurendouin said about the missing men. While holding her in that position he wondered who the men were and why they hadn’t come out to work. Even wondering if they had too much to drink and didn’t show up the next day because of a hangover. But a hangover wouldn’t last for days. 

Silas chuckled lightly putting her hand just over his heart. “I don’t need the gil, use it for the families, they’ll need it more than I ever would. Besides my father left me a hefty sum to leave until I got my ass screwed on right. His words, not mine.” The comment about him hating the cold was true. He used to argue with his mother when he had to come home to see his father.

Sometimes he’d take it out on Chione if she was nearby. But during that one Starlight Celebration, she was his warmth and he stuck to her like glue. At least one part of him was touching her at all times. Silas shook his head, his top teeth biting softly at his bottom lip while a soft chuckle escaped him again. “Are you going to keep me warm at night? Sliding into my bedroll, huddling close to me by the fire?”

Listening to him talk, she couldn’t help but sigh when the part about the girl who hated her came up again. Realization hit her hard when Silas spoke about the messed-up game he started with his friends. 

“If you didn’t cheat on me, then why did everyone tell me you did, Silas?” she questioned him, lightly gripping his shirt, still feeling the lingering touches of his lips against her skin. “Why did you do that to the girl? She didn't deserve that just because she didn’t like me.” Chione was blindsided when Silas said that. She paused as he continued to speak, telling her about his father, the man who used to watch them grow up together while spending days away from Sharlayan. Looking up at him, she sighed, a slight smirk tugging at her lips as he teased her again. 

“I doubt you’ll deny me, anyway, Si-Si. You’d kill to have me that close to you again. Besides, it’s been a while since you last had a competition with me to see who was the better swordsman.” She teased him as she let go of his shirt to go sit by the fireplace. Sitting down on the soft white carpet, she stared into the flames as they danced their erotic dance for her. 

“It’s killing me that all the memories of us came flooding back the minute I heard your voice again, but I need to focus on House Eirwen and the factories I manage. I need to focus on finding those poor workers who disappeared. I’ll need to talk with Baurendouin again and have him give me the emergency link pearls of the people who are missing… Can I rely on your blade again, Silas?” Chione asked as she lifted her head to look at him from across her bedroom.

“Chione,” Silas said her name in a more serious tone. “Didn’t my father send word that I’ve been disowned?” In truth, Silas wasn’t sure if that was public knowledge. His mother hardly said anything to him when it came to his father. And in return, he didn’t ask. Neither did he ask about the affairs of the house, nor its occupants. When she gripped his shirt lightly he glanced down at the way her fingers curled around the fabric for a moment before turning his attention back to her. 

“The day after… after our fight, I was told to leave. As for that girl, she deserved far worse than what I was planning on doing with her. She’d of course done a lot worse things to you if I hadn’t intervened. Not only did I threaten her, I threatened her family too.” Silas sighed letting go of her hand to rub his face. He didn’t think he’d have to explain his past actions, yet here he was. Trying to justify and explain them to her. 

Si-Si. Now that was a name he hadn’t heard in so long. There were at least a handful of people that he spoke to regularly who didn’t know him by the moniker, Hex. So when she said her old nickname for him, he couldn’t stop himself from smiling gently and following after her in front of the fireplace. Silas removed his leather jacket, exposing a form-fitted black turtleneck with a silver chain. 

He sat down beside her, dropping his jacket at his side and softly extended his fingers out to the flame. Both of his arms are on each side of his knees. “I would,” Silas whispered. His tone, was low and soft as he spoke. “Kill… I mean. If that’s what it took for us to start over again, I’d do it.”

“By the twelve…” He whispered again, this time dropping his head between his knees. “This is why I’ve avoided you for over a decade, I knew just being near you, I’d melt.” Silas chuckled lightly and lifted his head. While Chione spoke, Silas turned to look over at her. The flames of the fire cast shadows on her face as she spoke. Her blue eyes filled with emotion as she spoke about her people, and how she had to focus on her house. 

He knew what that meant. There was no room for him in her life, at least not at that moment. “This Baurendouin, would he have a file of the people missing? Address, family? That sort of thing.” Silas distracted himself from what she’d just said, but he nodded slowly. A low self-deprecating laugh escaped him soon after, “You may. I’ll help you, I already answered your missive, did I not?”

Chione smiled at him and reached for his slender hand. She scaled his frame with intent and interest.

“No, no one told us anything about you being disowned and disappearing. We haven’t heard anything from the Kane family since we called off our relationship. After that, I’ve just been focusing on business with my manufactory and discussing business for trading with my cousin, Vahalia Cress. I run Eirwen Steel and Stone now in my father's stead since he’s a Temple Knight under Lord Commander Aymeric.” Chione said, reaching to touch Silas’s hand softly.

“And now, knowing that you were disowned by your father,” she pauses, sighing and lowering her head in sadness. “It’s hard to even continue speaking with them.” Chione finishes, tightening her grip slightly on his hand and scooting her small frame over to him, leaning her head against his shoulder, a heavy breath escaping her nostrils, feeling exasperated from the events of her evening. 

“Well, difficult for me anyway, to speak to your parents.” 

“Where are you staying? I can have you stay here with me if you’d like, and we can go over a plan for tomorrow morning since I have to go to the factory and do my daily check-ups for my foremen.” She whispered as she stared at the flames, slightly embarrassed that she had opened her door to him. The blonde-haired woman couldn’t deny the feelings she had for him still. They were the complete opposite of each other but also felt equal—one. 

“Then we’ll be able to speak with Baurendouin. If the daft man shows his face.” Chione scolds in jest.

Silas looked towards her with a surprised expression. From what his mother said, it’s been announced that he was removed from society and disowned. Or at least some variation of that. A wave of confusion went through him as he wondered what his father was thinking. His fingers drummed lightly against his knee as he was lost in thought but made sure to listen to her. 

Vahalia, that name was familiar to him. She was part of the Cress family and a cousin to Chione. He’d only seen her a handful of times as their friends never collided with one another so he truthfully didn’t know much about her other than the few times he’d seen her. “It appears I’ve been away for too long if you’re the one running the Eirwen Steel and Stone now.” He laughed lightly shaking his head. 

“You know how the old farts in this part of the world are.” Silas laughed. “You do something wrong and you’re quickly dismissed. Now if I were half the man they thought I’d be, then that would be a different story. But I am not.” He smiled looking into the dancing flames. 

His body slowly began to warm up by the time Chione asked where he was spending the night. “Ahh, truthfully I was planning on leaving through the aetheryte and deal with the sickness afterwards before returning. I hardly have the supplies and clothing needed to weather the cold.” 

Silas leaned his head towards her as she rested her head on his shoulder. “If that’s your way of asking me to stay kitten I will. Are you offering your bed to me, or are you going to make me stay in the guest quarters?” He reached over to take her chin, but this time more gently as he tilted her head up. 

Silas stalling as he wondered if kissing her would be too much, but he leaned forward leaving just barely enough room between them. Her breath tasted like the wine she’d just drank and he wondered what the rest of her tasted, especially after all this time. “Slap or hit me if I’m being too forward.” His tone low and soft. 

Chione’s face flushed in embarrassment, but she nodded in agreement about the older Elezen in charge, feeling his fingers delicately take her chin. Their eyes met. The tension between the two was undeniable, and it felt like they started where they left off, minus Silas tormenting her. 

“I–I think it might be too early for that, Silas…” she stuttered; feeling like the cliche school girl all over again. Her heart was about to burst. If it beat any harder and louder the man before her was bound to hear it himself. 

“But I won’t strike you for it, that’s just silly.” Chione finished as she tried to clear her throat and pull away, but found herself still staring. His red orbs captivated her. Her toes becoming a little too warm as they sat by the fire in her room. Enjoying his presence was something she was always catching herself liking. The blonde woman snickered to herself as his question finally hit her. 

“I’d only offer my couch in my room to you for right now. You have to earn my affections before you jump into my bed, sir.” she jested as she nudged him slightly, finally able to pull her eyes from his. Sighing, the blonde-haired woman stretched her arms above her head, the sleeves of her robe riding up her biceps, showing slight muscle in her slender frame, and yawned. Fixing her lounge pants and tank top, she shivered slightly. 

“I can’t believe you pulled the same shit you did when we were kids. Climbing the wall like an Opo-Opo. What is up with that?” Chione laughed as she watched him, sensing the wheels in his head turning.

Silas groaned slightly and used his now free hand to cup the side of his face. “You are… something.” He muttered wanting to torment her further. So he did, he gently pushed her down into the plush carpet and wiggled himself in between her legs while his arm rested beside her head. 

“Will you strike me now?” Silas asked lightly trailing his finger on her exposed thigh. He leaned down and gently left a wake of kisses on her collarbone, neck and jaw before pulling away. Waves of desire nearly took over when he remembered that this wasn’t what he wanted either. This time he wanted to do something right and so he pulled himself off her and just knelt there, still in between her legs. 

“Perhaps an inn would be safest.” Silas chuckled lifting her back up to sit. “I can always climb back down like an Opo-Opo.” He laughed again, this time with her while she got up to get herself ready for bed. “Or… the sofa can work too.” A soft groan left him while he laid on top of the carpet, his eyes fixated on the ceiling above. 

“So tomorrow, we’ll head over to the factory then?” Silas inquired, wanting to follow up on what she said before. 

Chione gasped lightly as the tall male worked his way in between her legs, his question ringing in her ears as he peppered her chest, neck, and jaw with soft wet kisses. Her mind was so fuzzy from his touch before he stopped and pulled away. Champagne-colored hair plummed behind her head as she opened her eyes, unbeknownst to her that she had closed them the second he closed the gap between their bodies. Her feelings being pulled in every direction. Looking up at him, her blue orbs searching his crimson ones for any inkling of his actions. Chione knew better than to make a man kiss and tell, knowing that wasn’t how most men operated. 

“No, I will not hit you, you masochist,” Chione laughed as she took his hands to help her sit back up straight. “But yes, if things did go from there, an inn would be our best bet until I bought my own land.” 

Standing on her feet as Silas rolled onto his back, to stare at the ceiling, Chione walked to her bathroom as he jested with her about being called a small lemur. She stepped into her bathroom and wet her toothbrush as the silvery-haired Elezen asked her a question regarding their day tomorrow.

“Yes, I need to check on my Foremen and how things are running while short-staffed. Baurendouin better be there tomorrow, or I’ll blow a fuse.” She called, toothpaste slathered everywhere as she cleaned her teeth. With a hefty spit, she spat the remaining toothpaste into the washbasin as she rinsed the bristles of the toothbrush under the cool water before leaning down and gathering some of the liquid in her mouth to swish around and remove any loose gunk she might’ve missed. Reaching for her brush, she began to gently brush her hair as she walked to the threshold of her bathroom door, watching the man lay on her carpet, the steady rise and fall of his chest calming her. Thoughts ravaged her mind about what her parents might think, seeing Silas come back into the picture. Coming home. Chione’s father adored Silas and always viewed him as the “son he never had.” A soft simple smile tugged at the corners of her nude lips, the light tugging of knots not phasing her. As she finished she looked back at Silas, her eyebrow raised slightly. A low chuckle left her and she walked to her bed that sat in the corner of her spacious room. Pulling the blankets back; she readied herself for bed. Pulling a pillow and a heavy blanket off her bed, she placed them on the couch. 

“Here you go, if you need clothes I can call for Belmont?” Chione said as she sat down on her bed.

While Chione got herself ready for bed, Silas’ mind reeled on the fact he had nearly had his way with her. Both of his hands lifted as he pressed both palms against his face, trying to think of anything disgusting to stop his lower half from rising any higher. When the splashes of water came from the bathroom, he peeked through his fingers and watched as the curls from her head draped over her shoulders. Again, he was thinking of how soft her skin felt against his lips and he quickly covered his eyes again. 

Old, wrinkley, nuns… old, wrinkley nuns… nuns… Chione in a nun dress… Chione in a sexy… nun dress. No! Twelves above strike me now. Old wrinkley nuns! Old wrinkley stinky nuns! Silas chanted in his mind until he heard the water stop. 

Everything she’s said was lost to him and his mind as he propped himself up on his elbows. For once he felt relieved that she couldn’t see the flush on his cheeks. “I don’t need any, unless you’d feel more comfortable I’m clothed from head to toe after, well…” Silas chuckled sitting himself up to hide what was going on in his pants. 

He unbuttoned his shirt and removed it from his shoulders exposing his upper frame. There were multiple scars from his life out in the open world. Stories he’d likely have to tell her sometime if she ever asked about them. While she brought over the pillow and blanket, he at least calmed down enough that he could stand and unbutton his pants but stopped before looking at her.

“Think I can wear just my underclothes for bed, kitten? Or would you be more comfortable if I wore pants?” He asked, wondering what she'd be most comfortable with.

Chione watched him as he began to remove his articles of clothing. Exposing his torso to her, she saw the multitude of scars on his skin. Knowing better than to reopen old wounds, she’d badger him about those stories in the future, knowing full well it would take a miracle now for him to disappear from her life. 

“No, I don’t mind if you sleep in your underwear,” She spoke softly, her heart skipping a beat at her old nickname. Kitten. It made her feel cherished in a way. Loved. But Chione had different priorities now than a school crush… Or did she?  She tried to deny any and all feelings for that boy since he bullied her throughout their lives together. But that Starlight Celebration that they shared together all those years ago still clouded her mind every time she caught herself staring off into the aether. Chione shielded her eyes to give him privacy and he finished removing his clothes and lied down on the couch. The soft fleece quilt covering him. Remembering she still had her articles of clothing on she stood and turned her back to him, giving herself the little privacy she could. The sheer midnight blue robe gently slid off her back, hanging it on the hook by her bed. She wore shorts that were black and a lighter Dragoon-ish blue-colored tanktop. With nimble fingers, she pulled her champagne-colored hair into a messy bun atop her head before sliding into the sheets of her bed, covering her petite body. 

“Goodnight, Si-Si… I’ll see you in the morning,” Chione whispered as the two drifted off to sleep.

@vahalia-cress @hex-xiv

[nothinghereisworking]

Finarfin Appreciation

I tried to keep this to fics that feature Finarfin as a main character.  I have not read them all yet, but hey, now I have a list! Rated G

Thy Brothers' Keeper by @sallysavestheday The wine in Alqualondë is too light, Arafinwë thinks, for the kind of drunkenness he would like to seek tonight.  Arafinwë considers his place in the House of Finwë.

The Courage to Turn Back by @chrissystriped Finarfin makes a momentous decision.

in every stitch and seam by xhangemhighx Finarfin comforts Celebrimbor after the War of Wrath and realizes a few things.

someday they may call me king by earthbound_misfit Finarfin reflects on why they left and why he stayed.

these gentle words by Anonymous Arfin goes every year to the foot of the new Trees and honors the memory of his elder brother. Sometimes he thinks that Fëanor can still hear him.

Golden Fire by @starspray Finarfin just thought the dragon egg looked neat, so he brought it home.

Then it hatched.

Without Shame or Secrecy by @ladybrooke Soon after Celebrían arrived in Valinor, she had a discussion with her grandfather over teacakes about memories and family.

His heart was whole again by Elanor_Hermione The journey to Middle-Earth was doomed, it had been a mistake since the beginning, and Finarfin knew he couldn't keep going. But this meant he had to part ways with Artanis.

you're the face of the future (the blood in my veins) by @irisseireth Finarfin meets Ereinion Gil-Galad during the War of Wrath, and learns the truth about his parentage.

Sea Legs by onthesandsofdreams As he held onto the handrail of Elulindo’s ship, Aranfinwë cursed his father-inherited stubbornness.

Water and Blood by keiliss Finarfin and Ingwion discuss family, the weather, and their status as figurehead war leaders over a cup of wine, then start a little rebellion of their own.

Rated T

When I look at you... by @i-did-not-mean-to Prompt: Idiots in love

Questions by @ladybrooke Aegnor could not make the choice of Lúthien, but there were other choices he could make. Finarfin and Finrod deal with the aftermath of his choice.

Rated M

We Weep For What We Have Lost by @cuarthol Indis learns of Anairë's pregnancy by Arafin, and both Arafin and Anairë worry what her visit will mean for them.

Rated E

Manwë's Bird by elennalore Manwë takes Finarfin as his bird. Or: How to learn to be a bird of paradise when your world is shaken up.

Separation by @arofili Arafinwë aches for his wife, but she is lost to him. To earn his place in her heart once more, he will allow her new lover anything.

Unrated

Hey Cyclops! by bowl_of_borshch Finarfin is many things. Right now, Finarfin is a general, and his troops are starting to starve - and Beleriand is harsh and unforgiving. So when he gets a chance to replenish his supplies, he takes it - even though his mind screams at the recklessness of his decision.

A Terrible Choice by jpenn93 The leaders of the War of Wrath are in for a surprise when three young ones walk into the Command Tent. None more so than Finarfin.

And a terrible choice is presented...Finarfin tries to hold his tongue and is only successful due to long, long years of practicing impassivity.

[softquietsteadylove]

Me again! Could I maybe request a follow up to the lawyer/Thena raising her sisters au? The first one was so good and I'd love to see what happens when Gil comes over to make the lasagna. Thank you :)

"Hey!"

Gil looked up from chopping, just barely catching two heads ducking down behind the back of the couch again to resume pretending to watch tv. He chuckled, glancing briefly to his right, "it's okay, I don't mind."

Thena shook her head though, focusing back on cutting parsley with needlessly forceful chops. "They're only lingering so they can ask you invasive questions, despite me debriefing them earlier."

It was funny that she called it 'debriefing' them. But she had warned him that she didn't have much in the way of friends, so don't be concerned by the endless questions of being her boyfriend, or at least liking her, if not being accused of having a long standing affair with her. That, he had blushed at.

He shrugged though, laughing to himself as he caught the odd eye glancing his way again. "They're kids, I don't blame them for being curious. I did kind of come over uninvited."

"Trust me, it's never gone well when I've attempted to tackle our mother's recipes before," Thena muttered, looking at the hand written notes lovingly propped open on a book stand for their reference. She looked down and pointed with the knife, "like this?"

Gil smiled; the parsley looked like it had been murdered and sawed. He nodded, "looks great. Honestly, even finer--the smaller the better when it goes in the ricotta."

Thena accepted the instruction, resuming hacking at it.

Gil winced for the poor cutting board. "May I?"

Thena just watched as he reached over gently. He moved one hand to the back of the blade and adjusted the wrist of her other, demonstrating the rocking motion of a cleaner cut. "Oh."

"It'll be easier on your hand," he suggested lightly, leaving his ears and the cutting board's longevity aside.

Thena eyed him and the mirepoix he was stirring in the pot with sizzling meat already in it. She continued his work, slower and clumsier, but following his demonstration. "Thanks--this is what I was talking about."

He shrugged, though, adding the garlic and tomato paste to the loudly sizzling pot. "Hey, you wouldn't know this stuff unless it was taught to you. I just happened to be in the kitchen with my grandma a lot as a kid."

Thena stared down at her parsley, looking more and more fine by the moment. "Mother knew I was terrible in the kitchen. Father would remind me ceaselessly that a wife who couldn't cook was like a car with no wheels."

Gil frowned, "that's a pretty messed up thing to say. And to your own daughter?"

She gave him a half a smile and a raise of her sharp eyebrow, "you can tell why Mother's keepsakes are all over the house, while I didn't even keep the car that was in Father's name."

He gave her a little laugh at her joke, no matter how dark. "I guess I don't blame you for that. Moms hold the family together most of the time anyway, right?--taste."

Thena blinked at the speed with which he transitioned from one subject back to their dinner. But she accepted the bite of carrot, blowing before popping it into her mouth. "Hm, still crunchy, but it tastes good."

"Adding the tomato paste and frying it a little first helps get that tinny, acidic taste out, and sweetens it." He reached for the wine, adding a healthy glug or two before reaching for the canned tomatoes. He nodded his head, "want a glass?"

Her eyes darted to the living room.

She was a dutiful guardian, mother or not. Gil smiled, though, nudging the bottle, "one glass won't hurt, right? We're not going anywhere for the rest of the night, and they're fine."

Thena eyed the bottle before sighing, "there are some glasses on the top shelf next to the fridge, I think."

She thought, as in she wasn't sure. But Gil wiped his hands off on the towel he had thrown over his shoulder and moved to the fridge. There were indeed wine glasses still in there, upside down and everything. He pulled two out, admiring the light feel and crystalline shine of them.

"Hey," he whispered, pouring them each a modest glass of a mere few ounces each. He clinked them lightly too, although the quality of the glass still made them ting loudly. "To the first lasagne of many, right?"

That made her smile, and his own smile brightened. Whether it was lasagne or anything else from their mother's hand written recipes, he was happy to help with it. She picked up her glass and gave him a gentle smile over the rim of it. "To the inaugural lasagne."

Her lips looked even more full against the rim of a glass, and when she pulled away he realised for the first time that she wore just a little lip colour when they were in the office.

He averted his eyes from the faint pink on the rim of her glass, looking into his own swirl of red wine. Moving back to the pot he smelled the bubbling mixture. "Usually I'd say to let it simmer for a while, but about fifteen minutes should be fine so we can get things in the oven."

Thena nodded after another sip of her own. "Is the parsley cut enough?"

It was now practically a fine paste it was so chopped. The cutting board was stained green, which of course meant a lot of its flavour was stuck in the wood grain as opposed to still in the leaves. But he grinned, "looks great."

Thena rolled her eyes.

"Hey, really," he laughed, reaching around her for the bowl of ricotta to mix the greens into. "And you said you were terrible at this."

She sighed again, letting her eyes drift back to the couch and to the tv playing some kind of reality show. "Just ask them about the first time I tried baking cookies for them. I'm forbidden from contributing to bake sales. I think they nearly called the CDC on me."

Gil laughed from his belly at that. The heads on the couch turned to watch them again but he was busy looking at Thena, who was laughing faintly at her own joke. Or maybe she was laughing because he was. Either way, she had a cute laugh. "Come on, it couldn't be that bad."

She shook her head though, "poor Sersi had to take over for me to get even one pan of edible merchandise. I had to write a note excusing my poor performance."

Gil caught two pairs of eyes fully spying on them, getting caught be damned. But he slid against the edge of the counter to lean closer. "I mean, I would think they could give you a bit of a break, all things considered."

Thena's expression turned gloomy again, staring into her wine. "I think they do. But everything they send home for them to do feels herculean after a long week, or a big case, or soccer, or-"

The oven beeped loudly at them, announcing its preheating.

Thena gave him a light smile again as she retrieved the casserole dish they had selected. "Ready?"

"I'd say so," he replied gently. He picked up a ladle, first putting in some sauce on the bottom. "This helps to steam the noodles and prevent burning on the bottom layer."

"Hm," Thena mused as she watched him layer the first set of lasagne sheets in. "I thought it was a meaningless old tradition. I never imagined there was a reason for it."

Gil looked back at the recipe, "it's one of those things that you only know if you know. I'm sure your mom never thought of adding in stuff like this."

"No, I suppose not."

He gulped, wondering if he should have brought it up at all. But Thena's smile, although wistful, wasn't really sad. He pointed, "it's your time to shine."

She laughed faintly, scooping out the mixture of ricotta and her pulverised parsley. "I'm lucky I have your expertise."

He blushed. She could have asked him for anything, after he had found out what kind of day she'd had when she texted. He would have fished the moon out of the sky if she asked.

She flicked the spoon for the last glob before he layered on more sauce. "I may have to call on you again the next time we open the book."

He grinned down at the noodles as he laid them. Thena's hands were long but slim, her fingers so delicate and pretty. His sleeves were rolled up for cooking, as were hers. She looked half his size, standing next to him. "Any time, you name it."

"Careful Gil," she murmured, and it almost sounded like she was teasing him playfully. "If this turns out well, they'll be demanding you cook for them all the time."

He was pretty sure he would agree to that, whether by the girls' demand or their sister's. "The defense rests, your honour."

Thena rolled her eyes again at his corny lawyer joke, but she was still smiling at least.

"Okay," he breathed as he ladled on the last layer of sauce. "Get some cheese on this and I believe we'll have a beautiful lasagne in about an hour."

"About an hour?" she asked firmly as she sprinkled on the cheese mixture from the bag. "Don't underestimate my ability to ruin an hour's worth of hard work in the last ten minutes."

"Okay, okay," he chuckled. Thena was adamant in everything she did, from her casework in court, to her determination that she was a blackhole of culinary ability. "Set a timer for 40 minutes, then we'll check it, and I like to broil it for the last five or so, just to get that leopard spotting on the cheese."

"Yes, Chef," she purred (definitely teasing him).

He buried his nose in his wine glass again. He was just about empty, but Thena definitely didn't drink regularly with two teenagers at home, and he didn't come over to get buzzed anyway.

"Here," she said gently, reaching for the glass with the bottle already in hand. He had a polite decline on his tongue when she pulled his hand with hers, topping him up. "I owe you far more than dinner and some wine, but I guess it's a start."

"You don't owe me anything Thena," he frowned even as she poured herself a little more too. He leaned forward again, "really."

She just looked at him, and she was back to being completely unreadable. He dreaded to think what it was like to go up against her in court; not only was her beauty intimidating, but that stare was cold enough to chill his wine to the touch.

"Are you done flirting?!"

Gil tugged at his shirt collar, only to remember that he had already taken off his tie and undone the first two buttons so he wouldn't sweat in the food.

Thena glared at her sister, "I beg your pardon?"

The head of auburn hair ducked down like a startled dog, but didn't retreat entirely. "When's dinner gonna be ready?"

"In an hour," Thena snapped again, but it wasn't her sharp tone that had the girl trembling. If anything, her sharpness seemed familiar and comforting to her sisters.

"Can I have a diet coke?"

"No."

"Come on!" Sprite whined at her, "you're having a fun drink!"

Gil slid his eyes over to his colleague. The evidence was right there, even if he was the one at fault for it.

Thena let out a loud sigh, matching the dramatic energy of her sister(s). "Fine, you can each have one. But if it's gone before dinner, that's it, it's water for the rest of the night."

"Fine," Sprite moaned as she slid off the couch to retrieve them.

Thena glared at her.

"She means thank you," Sersi offered much more sweetly and docilely, even if it was just to appease their sister's glaring. She crept behind her younger sister, holding onto her shoulders the whole way to the fridge. Her eyes darted between them, "it, um, smells nice."

Gil smiled; they were nice kids. Thena had done a great job with them, clearly. "Thanks, I hope I got everything right."

"You can't do worse than her, dude, trust me," Sprite pointed blatantly at their guardian. "She's, like, find a bone in your cereal--bad."

"It was one time."

It wasn't a joke? Where did the bone come from?

"If dinner isn't for an hour," Sersi swayed on the spot, like a child shyly twirling her dress (although she was actually in yoga pants with a green flannel tied around her waist). "Would you like to watch an episode of Ghost Files?"

"Ghost show, huh?" Gil grinned, putting his hand on his hips. He looked over at Thena, who looked maybe even a little sheepish.

"It's our fav," Sprite added, excited at the prospect of sharing their favourite program. "They find evidence, and then Thee tells us if it would be accepted in court."

"None of it would be," she stated outright, "but they still ask me every episode."

She made it sound tedious, but she was smiling just like the other two as they started to move back to the living room. Gil followed, "sounds like a fun family thing."

"If you two sit up properly, there'll be room for Gil to sit," Thena suggested not-so-subtly.

But Sersi and Sprite threw themselves back onto the couch. One side was clearly claimed by each, Sersi's with a fluffy blanket for her legs and Sprite's with a crumpled up throw pillow and snacks on her respective end table.

They pointed. "Or you can sit on the loveseat."

"Yeah, why else have two couches?" Sprite snickered with a mouthful of roasted peanuts.

"Animals," Thena admonished her sisters, and yet took a graceful seat on the smaller sofa adjacent to the tv. She had sat closer, giving Gil the better seat for viewing. She pulled one of her legs up, leaving the other down and her pencil skirt stretching to accommodate her.

He sat down on the other cushion, clutching his wine glass and trying to focus on the show, rather than how he could now smell that Thena also wore a little perfume when she was in the office too.

[lendmyboyfriendahand]

Maglor/Daeron mpreg

Maglor was honestly enjoying the festival. All the planning details were Fingolfin’s responsibility. Maglor’s younger brothers were back East, guarding the border that hadn’t had a serious battle in years, and unable to cause political drama. Celebrimbor and Gil-Galad were both in attendance, with Celebrimbor looking out for his “younger cousin” before Gil-Galad went to Ethel Sirion to learn about court.

For the first time since Valinor, Maglor could sing without any other concerns. After a few songs, he had acquired a crowd. Some of them were Silvan and Falmari, and Maglor always took extra pride when he was recognized purely for his voice, not his family name. 

One stranger in the crowd seemed very intent though. He stared directly at Maglor, though he did not move when someone blocked his view. Instead the stranger remained still. 

Three  songs after the stranger appeared though, Maglor noticed a strange vibration. This elf was humming under his breath - but in perfect rhythm with the songs Maglor had never before played in front of audience, and notes that only departed from Maglor’s own to go on on trilling runs of harmonies. 

Maglor stopped singing to take a drink of the excellent wine. He had not been on any sort of stage, so it was easy enough to approach the stranger. 

“You have a good sense of melody,” Maglor said. “Do you play an instrument yourself?”

“I play the lyre, and the twin pipes, and sing as well. Your voice is very well trained.”

“Thank you. Talent without practice is wasted, after all.”

“Is it?”

“It’s a saying from Tirion, or perhaps just from my kin folk. But that’s not important.”

“What is, then?”

“I would love to hear you actually sing or play, rather than just muffled accompaniments.”

__

They create a melody, a harmony, a song that takes on a life of its own. Their voices twine into something that is made of both of them, but a thing unto itself. Daeron realizes that he has invoked his maternal inheritance too late. He pulls back from the song, to tell Maglor what they have done, but Maglor sees only that their creation is about to falter.

Maglor sings louder, and claims the tune as his own. It needs a vessel, and Maglor offers his. Daeron initially panics, but communicates to Maglor that co-creation with a maia is approximately similar to having a baby, and Maglor as male is totally unequipped for that.

“Oh, is that the only problem! It’s not pleasant, but I can do so again.”

Maglor goes to Doriath their son a year later, begging for safety for the grandson of the king and queen. Maglor pushes through branches, carefully protecting the bundle in his arms. But at one wild rose bush, the edge of the blanket is caught. When Maglor untangles it, the baby has disappeared from the blanket, and the rose bush grown brambles so thick Maglor could not reach even a finger in. “I named him for the strength of his grip and the weight of his actions!” Maglor shrieks at the trees. “Lungum, if you ever let him speak his mother-tongue!” The forest is silent, though the bush next to him now has buds amidst the thorns.

They say after that Mablung of the heavy hand was at the Mereth Aderthad, and it is true, the way elves count the beginning of a life.

[writingmaidenwarrior]

The Cards We Got Dealt Part 7 - Sin Eaters AU

This is for the OC Kiss Week Prompt "Almost"

Yeah, this took me forever and ages. Fuck work, fuck health, fuck everything, but here we are. Maybe, there will be an epilogue. I am toying with an idea.

Tagging @cljordan-imperium @jezifster @noblebs

Warnings: seriously NSFW, forget fade to black, this is "Let them fuck on screen at least once", also warning for slightly bondage?, rough sex

There is a kind of serenity in love which is almost paradise. Alain Badiou

Those one and a half day without Talindra felt like a month. The day of the duel like a year, but those last hours with the rite master and sorting all the official things out they needed to sort before leaving for home the next day felt like multiple eternities. At least it had been noted down by now that the clans will become one with the name still needs to be decided on, and it will be officially a dual leadership because neither he nor Talindra wanted to be the sole leader of the new clan.

The clans were celebrating the final night by the time they were back from the rite master and the first lights had been lit.

“Exhausted?” Talindra asked carefully.

“I just need this bath finally and I am good.”

“I have an idea.”

The wink didn’t get lost on him and to be honest, if her idea went the same path as his, he was all in for it. They sneaked behind the crowd to his cabin, giggling and snickering like they were way younger and this their first gathering.

He stopped at the veranda of the cabin and grabbed her hand to kiss it, placing another one on the inside of her lower arm before he pulled her close.

“There is a tub upstairs.”

“We need to warm the water for it.”

“And carry it from the well…”

“What do we do now?”

“Just get up, you coal brains,” Melleis opened the door laughing, “We thought you would need one and filled the tub. Gil is warming the water right now. Once it is done the cabin is all yours for the night.”

Giggling more Wynthan pulled Talindra inside. To his surprise Eshfyrr wasn’t around, also none of the warriors. Melleis caught his glance and rolled her eyes.

“They are all at the celebration. Gil and I just waited for you to come back. I brought some drinks and food upstairs for you. I am sure you will need it.”

Melleis walked past them, a moment later Talindra yelped and turned to Melleis with a surprised look. Before a brawl could break out, Wynthan hugged her tight and kissed her again.

“Be nice, that’s just her.”

“I wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.”

They moved to the huge bedroom in the back of the cabin. Gilmyrn came out of his room when they were a few steps away. The broad smile was already a warning he had something to say.

“I made it really hot in case the two of you need a moment,” he stated with a wink, “I also like to kidnap Talindra for a moment.”

“I am a busy woman,” she snickered.

“I will wait for you.”

Wynthan placed another kiss on her nose before he entered his bedroom. The tub steamed in the corner as a sign Gilmyrn overdid it seriously with heating the water. Using the moment, he was alone in the room, Wynthan went to check his preparations on the bed. The woven bands he got as spares in case something happened to those, he wore during the gathering, were tied with one end to the frame and hid well under the pillow. The round mattress was fluffy enough to be molded when needed and the food Melleis talked about stood on the table at the window. He went to see what she got them and snickered when he realized it was cold meat, fruits, and some sweet treats. The two jugs held honey wine and watered down juice. His family honestly made sure they wouldn’t need to leave the room until the morning.

A soft knock on the door made him jump. Talindra smiling face greeted him.

“Your family is one of a kind.”

Moving her hips in wide sways she came over to him, taking the hair pins out of her hair on her way and put them down on the table once she reached him. The fading light of the sundown framed her face along her open hair that flowed over her shoulders in a beautiful way. Wynthan gulped hard and reached out to take the beaded strings out of her horns with gentle touches.

“You have yet to meet Delythea, Niskranym and my mother. On the other side, you might be lucky with my mother. Delythea gave birth a few days ago and I am sure my mother will be busy swooning and spoiling her first grandchild.”

The beaded strings joined her hair pins under her soft chuckle.

“Sounds like she couldn’t wait to be a grandmother.”

“The day my sister told us my mother was overjoyed. I am surprised Delythea didn’t kill her,” Wynthan laughed and pulled her closer.

“And you?”

“What about me?”

Talindra smirked at him in some strange knowing way.

“How annoying were you?”

“I am afraid you need to ask my sister,” he admitted with an embarrassed laugh, “But don’t let us talk about this anymore. There are other plans for tonight.”

“Like your bath.”

With a tender touch she unwrapped the ribbons from his horns and placed them next to her beaded strings. Her fingertips ghosted over his neck and shoulders down to his hands before she took them and pulled him over to the tub.

“What is your plan?”

Wynthan watched her looked up to him from between her lashes with this smirk still in place.

“Making sure you get your well-deserved bath and are relaxed.”

His hand wandered through her soft wavy hair while he wondered why she didn’t wear that stupid plated neck jewelry today but was thankful for it on the other side. With a gentle tuck he pulled on the string that held her tunic up on the shoulders. Talindra’s fingers brushed over his stomach and mirrored the actions with the strings of his pants. Almost simultaneously, like a dance they trained for years, both stepped out of the thin shoes. Her tunic fell off her shoulders while she moved and down her upper arm.

“Maybe I make this a new fashion the next time,” she joked and untied the belt.

The sound of metal hitting the floor surprised Wynthan. Curious he looked down to see what it was and found a dagger between their feet.

“Damn, I forgot about that”, she laughed.

A second one appeared in her hand and got tossed to the table as she kicked the other one into the same direction.

“A woman prepared for everything,” Wynthan stated huskily and grabbed her by her waist for a kiss.

Her belt followed the dagger, followed by his pants only moments later. Wynthan took his time and let his hands wander over her sides down to the hem of her tunic before her swiftly pulled it over her head under her giggles.

“I expected another dagger.”

“I only had light weaponry today,” Talindra laughed into his kiss.

“Lucky me.”

“Yeah, lucky you.”

They nibbled playful on each other’s lips while their hands tried to undo each other’s underwear. Chuckles and smiles mixed in the kisses, once or twice they evaded because the touch tickled until both were finally naked. One more time Wynthan let his fingers weave through her soft hair, his nose buried in the crock of her neck.

“You should get into the tub before you fall asleep.”

“I just enjoy your company.”

With minor force Talindra turned him around and pressed into the small of his back to make him get into the tub.

His lips curled in a soft smile he followed her order. The hot water embraced him, luring a soft sigh from him. Wynthan closed his eyes as he stretched out in the tub. The splashing sounds that followed were enough to know Talindra entered it as well. A second later she laid against his chest, her hair rolled together and thrown over the rim behind them. It took some small adjustments until both were comfortable and let out a long-satisfied breath.

“That is really nice,” she hummed happy after a while.

“Have you ever been to the trading post?” Wynthan asked while nibbling on her neck.

“No, why are you asking?”

“There is a natural hot spring not far from it. I always suggested to expand it towards the hot spring and have a traveler’s house there. Maybe we just expand there and have the clans house there.”

Her hums were already an answer.

“Relaxing baths at a hot spring whenever you want… that’s the dream.”

Drippling water over her body Wynthan wondered if she had other ideas than just a relaxing bath but for now, he didn’t care. The time to find out would come soon.

Talindra overstretched her neck and placed a kiss on his chin with a smile.

“What are you thinking?”

“Nothing in general.”

Her arms linked behind his neck, Talindra curved her back in a perfect angle to expose her breasts. A smirk played around his lips. She clearly had a certain idea of relaxing bath. Again, he let water dripple over her body.

“You know, my people also seem to favor Sea Seekers as new clan name”, she snickered into his ear.

“We have to see what the rest back home have to say about this.”

Wynthan’s hand came to rest on her stomach under a thoughtful hum of hers. The humming almost sounded like purring to him and made him chuckle.

As good as possible he tried to reach the soap but failed. Talindra got up a little and got it for him with a playful gleam in her eyes.

“Eager to get out of the tub?”, she teased while playing with the soap in her hand, looking over her shoulder.

“I have the feeling you are eager to get out,” he shot back.

“Oh, you can also have fun inside the tub, and don’t forget you promised me something.”

Wynthan leaned forward to embrace her and nibbled on her neck.

“I plan to keep it. Even if I am afraid, it would ignite the heat in both of us,” he mumbled into her neck.

“If so?”

“You know the risk.”

As good as possible in the narrow tub Talindra turned around to him with an open face, her lips hiding a small smile behind them being pressed together.

“I do, and I also think chasing each other for the last seven years is enough time wasted. If I get pregnant, I will be more than happy.”

Her gaze dropped for a moment, and she wrinkled her nose before she looked up to him again.

“What is it?”

“Just a stupid little thing.”

“You know, you can tell me everything,” Wynthan pulled her closer.

The water moved over the rim, sending Talindra’s hair around them. Both snickered as they realized her plan to not get it wet failed miserably.

“There might have been nights in which I imagined how it would be to have a family with you,” she spoke fast and in such a low mumble it was almost impossible to understand.

The second he understood he took her chin and raised her head up for a kiss.

“That isn’t stupid, my light.”

“What happened to fire heart?”

“You got promoted,” he smiled and placed another kiss on her nose, followed by one on her forehead, “I will never ask you to have a child if you aren’t ready. I have seen so many times what toll a pregnancy takes on the body. As long as I have you, I am a happy man, no matter how many children we have or none at all.”

“Gods, how can you be so sweet and not dissolve in the water,” Talindra laughed but also obviously stifled away some tears.

“It is a talent.”

“I can see.”

“Tal?”

“Mhmm?”

“I also thought about it every time I tried to find the courage to visit your clan.”

“Really?”

“Yes, as real as I sit here.”

Talindra poked and squeezed his torso under giggles.

“What is that about?”

“Checking if you dissolve…”

“I am only dissolving into you.”

“Oh gods, stop it, that is too much…”, she groaned but got stopped with another kiss.

His hands wandered to her back and pulled her with him when he leaned back in the water again. The humming sounds she made was all he needed to hear to know she didn’t mind and let his hands wander to her ass and squeezed hit. A soft moan into his ear was her reaction, followed by gentle hip movements.

“Is this better, my light?”

“Way better. I have been burning for you since the duel.”

His fingernails scrapped over her skin up from the sensitive skin of her ass up to her neck. Her shivering was even visible. Her head tilted downwards into his shoulder it was easy to reach her horns with his mouth, so he placed kisses on the tips of the closest horn before gently sucking on it. A mix of yelp, moan and cry escaped her as she pressed herself deeper into him.

“Can you wait a little more?” he asked in a low voice.

A greedy whimper greeted him first, but she sighed.

“Why?”

“I want to treat you right.”

“The preparations…”

“Yes,” Wynthan chuckled.

Unwillingly she untangled herself from him. Her nipples stood erect and like little angry buds against her tawny skin. Maybe it was just him because he knew she was not pleased with needing to wait.

Wynthan searched for the soap in the water and finally managed to clean get soaped up. Shaking her head Talindra motion him to give it to her. The next moment she made a show of cleaning herself, her eyes on him all the time. He couldn’t deny the way Talindra slowly rubbed the soap foam over her breast had the intended reaction.

He got out first and dried himself up fast before he helped Talindra out of the tub. Her long hair dropped water like a leaky bucket and while she was busy wringing it out, Wynthan rummaged around to find some ribbon to tie it together.

Proud he held it up to her.

“Let me help you with it.”

“It is your fault anyway,” she teased already braiding it in one single braid, holding the hair over the water because it wrung more water out of it.

Once she reached the end, he bound the ribbon around it but left enough of it to give her the chance to tie it up. She acknowledged it with a smile and used it to roll the end up over the braid halfway, to make the wet part lay over the dry part.

The moment she was done, she jumped at Wynthan with a broad smile.

“I dare you to keep your promise.”

“Whatever my light wishes.”

Both smiled like crazy, as he laid her down on the bed, reaching for the ribbons under the pillow. Surprised she looked up for what he was grabbing and got big eyes. Her breath got faster.

“May I?”, Wynthan asked.

“Yes, please,” she breathed needy.

He tied the knots in a way he could undo it fast and used the way she laid in front of him to let his hands wander over her body. Her hums, moans and deep breaths were stories of how much she loved what he did when his thumb teased her nipples while he kissed her stomach. Or when he suckled on her nipples while caressing a horn, all to get her more worked up.

“Nat…,” she whined.

“Yes?”

“Fuck me.”

He chuckled against her ribcage. One hand moved lower and slipped deep into her wet folds. Talindra buckled immediately with a loud moan. She wanted it rough, so he didn’t bother with one finger first but already used three to please her, while his thumb rested on her sensitive clit. Aware how it must be too much for her he kept on sucking on her nipple and caressed the horn while he fucked her with his hand even if there were displeased noises between her moans.

Wynthan knew she wanted to be fucked for real, and it was getting more difficult to not turn her over and ravage her like an animal, even if it was exactly what she wanted. Talindra buckled under him and cried her orgasm out into the world. Panting and huffing she snickered, only to yell surprised when Wynthan gave in his own needs and turned her on her stomach, her hands still bond to the bed.

Her ass propped up with the help of molding the mattress and her upper body bent down, he slowly entered her. Talindra bent more into making a hollow back and sighed pleased. After a few thrusts, Wynthan was sure the position would work and bent slightly over her, pressed one hand between her shoulder blades to keep her down and moved with fast, shallow thrusts.

The hand on her back moved up to her upper arm as Wynthan bent more over her, the need to feel more of her growing with each moment. Talindra turned her head to him for a kiss that got disturbed with every thrust. His need to be closer to her grew even more as much as her moans became needier and she pressed her butt against him, meeting him with every thrust.

An aroused growl left his chest as he realized this wasn’t what he needed. He pulled away from her, getting a whimper in return followed by a threatening growl. Wynthan turned her around again on her back with her still propped up that way and her hands bound. Talindra breathed in sharp with huge eyes, only for her eyes to roll back in anticipation.

“Yes…,” she whispered with a serene smile.

Wynthan didn’t know what she agreed to but whatever it was she seemed to be more aware what was happening. He only care about her being fine with all of this and kissed her before he entered her again, pulling her legs over his arms and fold her almost over. Now he laid over her, able to fuck her as deep as possible, as fast as she liked and feel her, kiss her and nimble on her ear all at the same time.

Time lost its meaning, even when Wynthan felt their horns tangle together, when a part of him realized something was different because after his first orgasm it felt like his dick got even bigger and he felt as he could go on for hours.

Talindra underneath him was a moaning, yelling, whining mess who occasionally only told him to go on and to claw into his shoulders like her life depended on it.

The sensation of an orgasm announced itself another time, but it felt stronger and in some way like fire through his veins. Without thinking about it Wynthan threw his head back when he came again. A part of his conscious heard the crack and noticed the pain from his horns, but the majority of his body was busy with feeling on fire from the last orgasm.

Panting heavily, he collapsed onto Talindra. Clumsy he let go of her legs and only noticed now how their tangled horns laid still tangled together behind him. Her tired out of breath laughter helped him find back into reality.

“What…?” he breathed exhausted.

She stroked his cheek still laughing.

“Someone was a little bit overenthusiastic.”

“Yeah…”

Awkward, he tried to fell next to her, but Talindra followed his movement and rolled on top of him with a broad smile, catching his head in the ribbons. Opening the knots with rolling eyes, he raised his head to softly push his nose against hers. They felt the mattress move into its natural position underneath them, bringing a chuckle out of Wynthan as well.

With the freedom of being able to use her arms again, Talindra curled up on him, some loose hair strands framing her face. A content mumble escaped her.

“I don’t want tomorrow to come.”

“I know, my light. Soon we don’t need to part ever again.”

“Promise me, we will see each other again as fast as possible.”

“I promise.”

His fingers ghosted over her spine, drawing imaginary patterns on her skin.

The morning came too fast. Wynthan wished he could just stay in bed with Talindra and forget about their track home and all the responsibilities but the noises and voices outside made it hard to ignore. Her soft chuckle chimed in his ear.

“We should take a look.”

“I like to stay with you.”

“I know.”

Talindra turned around in his arms and placed a kiss on his lips. Her hand went to the raw place his horn should be and gently rubbed over it. He hissed in pain.

“That bad?”

“Yeah. Worse than walking on seashells.”

Her hand went to the nub on her head and touched it. He felt he flinch, but it seemed it wasn’t as painful for her as it was for him.

“No, walking in seashells hurts more,” she giggled.

Involuntarily he chuckled as well.

The voices outside got louder and for a moment he thought he could hear their names.

“I am afraid we really need to get up.”

With a kiss of hers placed on his shoulder, Talindra got up first. Most of her braid came undone during the night, so she undid what was left of it.

“Don’t smirk that broadly. I will get you for this.”

A playful gleam in her eyes she looked over her shoulder to him.

“I am not smirking.”

“What is that on your face than?”

“I am content.”

“Of course.”

Laughing he got up and went to pick some proper clothes for the day. Unfortunately, being half naked wasn’t an opting for the long way home. His gaze went to the ribbons that were still tied to the bed and undid them. A short glance to Talindra told him she just finished undoing her hair, so he went to hug her.

“Got you.”

“We won’t get finished like this,” she scolded softly but looked down to the woven ribbons on his hands in front of her, “What is this?”

“The spare ribbons my sister made. I want you to have them.”

“You sure?”

“I am. I won’t need them until the next gathering, right?,” he smiled at her encouraging.

Talindra’s fingertips wandered over the ribbon with a frown.

“I wonder if there is a possibility to weave pearls in those.”

“You will need ask Delythea about this. She made them. If someone knows, it’s her.”

Smiling she took the ribbons and used one to bind her hair together.

Once they were dressed, the noises got louder the moment they stepped into the hallway. In the combined kitchen and living room area were Eshfyrr and Kylantha with their backs to them, obviously busy with something else. The sole sight of them working together was a strange thing in itself.

“And what are you doing here?” Wynthan asked, trying to put up a stern face.

Both jumped around like they were caught doing something illegal and held some beads and ribbons in their hands. Glances got exchanged between them. Talindra broke out laughing first and went to see what Kylantha held in hers.

“You brought pearls over?”

“And some of the ribbons and your brush because I was sure you would look like a freshly hedged bird.”

“While you were busy we sat together last night and thought it would be a nice start to show to mix of both clans though this,” Eshfyrr added.

“Also, we thought we should leave together and head to the trading post at first, so you can see what needs to be done. It would be only a detour of a few days for each of us. We already sent ravens to inform he clans back home.”

Wynthan and Talindra looked at each other surprised.

“Why are we needed?” she snickered.

“I have no idea, they manage well without us.”

“Maybe we should reorganize the whole clan.”

He slowly nodded getting what she was thinking.

“Yeah, that would be something to ponder.”

“You know we are still here?” Kylantha asked loud.

The smile on her face betrayed her serious tone.

“Let’s get ready before anyone commits a murder,” Wynthan joked and nodded to Eshfyrr to grab a chair, “So you managed to talk Mel out of doing it?”

“Gil made sure she is too drunk for this,” Eshfyrr laughed with his head down, busy sorting the beads.

“Do I want to know why?” Talindra interjected curious.

“Mel is not the nicest person while braiding. We all dread the day she has children because it will mean a lot of wailing coming from their home,” Wynthan explained.

“Or we manage to teach her to be more careful until then,” Kylantha suggested.

“No one could so far…” Eshfyrr sighed.

He probably recounted the many times the poor children of the clan were her training objects because everyone was eager to teach her to be gentler.

“And where is Meri?”

“You will love this.”

Kylantha’s laughter shook her whole body.

“Did she break something?”

“Only her hand.”

Eshfyrr snickered as well, what gave Wynthan the idea his cousin witnessed it.

“What happened?” Wynthan asked for Talindra.

 “She got into a fight with one of the female clan leaders over a piece of meat, stumbled when she wanted to swing at her and planted her fist into a stone.”

For a second silence filled the room before everyone burst out laughing.

“For her own sake, we should keep her away from the next gathering,” Talindra laughed tears.

Someone came in and brought some breakfast for them what let Talindra’s stomach growl loudly.

While Eshfyrr and Kylantha worked on doing the few braids and adding the beads, pearls and ribbons, Wynthan and Talindra did their best to get some food and sit as still as possible.

“You know, I should have bet with Deiwryll about your horn situation this morning. I would have won,” Kylantha stated nonchalant out of the sudden.

“Hey!”

Talindra turned in her chair and glared at her friend. Wynthan looked up to Eshfyrr with an unspoken question and the suppressed laughter told him that his clan did bet on it. Rolling his eyes he accepted his fate.

“Nat, say something!” Talindra requested and pointed at Kylantha.

“I have to apologize but it seems a lot of people did.”

Her glare went to Eshfyrr.

“I didn’t, I swear by the gods! But once there was enough honeyed wine a lot of people couldn’t help themselves. No one would have guessed you are so stubborn you both will lose it.”

“I wouldn’t call it stubborn,” Wynthan threw in with a naughty smirk.

Slowly he could see how her hair was going to be styled and already loved it. Few small braids from her sides with beads and pearls would come together in the back and join the huge braid on her upper head that was styled with ribbons. It wouldn’t surprise him if it all would be joined to one big braid in the back and fastened with more ribbons.

From what he felt how Eshfyrr worked, he was getting a similar hairstyle but without the big braid on top, and the hair simply pulled together in the back without braiding. Both were mixes of typical style of both clans. Once he was finished, Wynthan needed to ask the others how much time they spend on coming up with this.

It felt like an eternity since they were done and finally could step outside. The whole clan stood outside, giving them an impression how big they would be now. Happy yells and whistles sounded off the moment the crowd noticed them.

“A hail to our clan leaders!” someone yelled.

“Gods bless Talindra and Wynthan,” dozens of voices roared off.

Wynthan’s hand searched for Talindra’s as he looked at her.

“We will get through it, together.”

“Together, till the day of ashes,” she beamed back at him.

“Kiss!”

Multiple yells sounded from the crowd making them laugh. Under the eyes of their new created clan Wynthan and Talindra kissed for the first time officially the clan leaders of a new clan.

[thefreelanceangel]

betrayal: Has your OC ever been betrayed by someone they thought they could trust? Has your OC ever betrayed someone who trusted them?

monster: Is your OC monstrous in any way? Is there something that makes them monstrous? Are they aware of their own monstrosity? Do they accept it or reject it?

For any :)

[REDACTED] sold four of the Kyho children to the Empire, shortly after C'kyho assumed his position as nunh. It took very little time for the family to a) realize the children were missing, b) notice who else was missing, c) get a posse together, and d) head out after their kits.

After losing one of the kits and two fighters in the struggle to get the children back, C'kyho packed up the tribe and moved them out of season to a different site. He then sent his eldest son after [REDACTED].

None of the Kyho tribe saw C'ilo for two years, as [REDACTED] recognized him on sight and betrayed him into an Imperial prison. C'ilo managed to escape, and for fifteen years, C'kyho paid time, effort, and gil to various merchants and mercenaries to hunt [REDACTED] down. He wouldn't send any of his family after them, not after nearly losing his eldest son.

Three years ago, C'allie brought a heavy jar to her father and opened it, pulling a head out of the preservative wine and oil filling the jar. He identified it as [REDACTED] and thanked his daughter with a tent fit for a princess. The name C'kyho struck from the family registry, the head burned, and the scorched skull now rests in a chest at the foot of C'kyho's bed.

It'd never occur to Summer to describe herself as monstrous, nor would she understand why someone called her that. After all, she's so much like the rest of her family! They're all so high-spirited and whimsical, ready to drop everything on a moment's notice just to play! They love to laugh, to be merry, to eat sweets and discover something new!

How could anyone ever describe her pixie relatives as monstrous? Or her? Every leafman in Il Mheg is so meticulously cared for! They know the names and stories of each one!

And if they let the fuath have the occasional ill-mannered visitor, what of it? The fuath need their fun, too. It isn't as if they don't contribute to Il Mheg, they're just as vital to the safety of the Dream as the nu mou or the pixies.

Only someone afraid of joy would call Summer and her family monstrous. Or someone with something to hide... Perhaps someone... with ill intent, hmm?

{Summer absolutely doesn't consider herself monstrous, but she has the same callous disregard for personal autonomy, property, space, and ... life that her pixie family does. She really can't be trusted.}

[cositapreciosa]

You & Me II

Gilbert 'Gilly' Lopez x ex-army!reader, (implied murder/drug use/smut, swearing, ptsd, angsty but happy-ish ending) the usual for the show, 3528 words

a/n : you can read part 1 here and 1.2 here and 3 here !!

A special shoutout to @narcolini for renting me their Ava & their Marco OCs. We are so deeply into it we are bulding our own multiverse and shit, you can read In his shadow here !

Tagging my Gilly people @narcolini @drabbles-mc

You were taking your cup of coffee from Gil’s hand when you first heard the car pull into the driveway. You hadn’t thought much of it in the beginning, setting your mug down on the dinner table and taking a sip. It is a busy neighbourhood, close to the elementary school, not too far from the shops, and hearing the gravel fly wasn’t making you jump from the couch like it used to. It was only the two of you in the house this morning, Rae had been able to bring Jacob to school, letting you enjoy Gil’s company until he had to leave for work as well.

With a hand, he caresses your shoulders as he moves around you, toward the entryway. You call on him as he steps further away, something about his coffee getting cold, but he doesn’t hear you, all of his attention being pulled to the window, the heavy steps you can now hear on the stairs. You get it then, that the screeching of the breaks wasn’t from the neighbour’s house, that the sound of a closing door wasn’t coming somewhere down the street. His training had kicked in before yours, shoulders pushed back, ears straining. He glances back at you.

‘’ Someone’s at the door, you stay right there for me, okay? ‘’

Fuck. If he sees the changes in your body language he doesn't mention it, but before you can argue with him, he is already at the door, pulling it open.

‘’ Marco? ‘’

You hear the surprise in his voice, the confusion that laces the tone. You can barely see who it is over his shoulders, taking up most of the door frame, but if you had to guess, this ‘Marco’ is Ava’s brother. The second youngest one, the police academy one she told you about. He moves a bit to the left and Ava’s brother doesn’t even have to be fully in your field of view that you know your assumption is right. Tan skin, hands on his hips to balance the weight of the belt, the same nose he shares with his sister. The cop one. It takes everything in you not to run to the back door right here, right now, to stay here and eat stale bread as you pretend there wasn’t a body in the back of your trunk a month ago.

‘’ Good morning, Gilly. I wanted to call, but I figured I would just show up.‘’

You had met him once, barely in passing, a polite boy from a good family, Gilly’s friend. You mostly stood back as you watched them keep up on local news, hands sweating, adrenaline pumping just by looking at the holster at his hip. Before then, you had already met Ava, enjoyed wine and dinner at her house more than once, coffee dates on the terrace if the weather was good. She had told you some childhood stories, how Marco was a hard-working boy, top of his class, that time she had to pick him and Sebastian from the bar because they couldn’t even stand. It felt weird to know so much about someone who had just learned your name and shook your hand, but it gave you a weird feeling of being a step ahead of them. Whoever ‘them’ were, whoever would come looking for him.

Marco takes a quick look inside, where you are sitting at the table, coffee getting cold in your hand. A smile pulls at his lips, waving your way quickly, he must have recognized you.

‘’ Good morning, ma’am. ‘’

You don’t wish him one back, back straight on your chair, looking at him like a hawk. He doesn’t seem to mind, already turning back to Gilly instead.

‘’ You got a second? ‘’ Marco’s eyes flicker back to you, ‘’ You know, like a private one? ‘’

You know it probably has to be something about club business, something Marco figures you shouldn't know about. Gil takes a step outside, pulling the door closed with him, but not before throwing what you hope is a reassuring smile your way. He must know you saw the uniform, the gun and the handcuffs hanging from his belt. You don’t really know what Marco’s full relationship with the club is, a subject Ava never really deep-dived into. Understandable, when you know what happened to Sebastian. Grief, sadness, everyone and no one to blame at the same time. Things you fear you might face later down the road as well.

The door shuts with a click and the whole room stops moving. You can hear the murmur of the news channel on the tv in the living room, their faint voices through the walls. You have to trust Gil, trust his judgment and that he is taking care of it. He wouldn’t have opened the door if he didn’t think he could deal with it. You can already feel your heart speeding up, feel how hard it is pumping blood up and down your body, blurring the edges of your eyesight.

Deep breath in, deep breath out.

You don't know how long they stay outside, but it feels like hours later when he opens back the door. You can't read Gil's face, that is the first thing you notice, the first thing that actually scares you more than the idea of having Marco arrest you for murder in your own kitchen. You meet the young man's eyes behind Gil and he is quick to offer you another wide smile. It doesn't make his eyes shine as the first one did, and you realize whatever happened, it must be big. You let yourself think for a second that maybe he isn't here for you, maybe it's the club, maybe-

‘’ Hope I didn't steal him too long, ma'am. ‘’ Marco is talking to you again, trying to downplay it, ‘’ I'll leave you two to it. See you later, Gilly. “

They exchange a pat on the back, a few whispered sentences you can't catch, and then Marco closes the door. Barely a second passes that you already want answers.

‘’ What did he mean by that? Where are you going? ‘’

He is walking back to you as his fingers comb through his beard, scratching the stubble under his chin. You can feel him miles away, even though he is only a few feet from you.

‘’ Nowhere. Not now. ‘’

He is not listening to you, generic answers to make it seem like he is.

‘’ Gilbert. ‘’

He looks up to you at that, as if he is only now noticing you across the table.

‘’ What? ‘’

‘’ You're not listening to me. ‘’

‘’ You're right. I'm sorry. ‘’

You wait for him to talk to you, to tell you what happened. You two don't keep secrets, you never did, never will. You accept that he doesn't tell you much about club things, to keep you away from any backlash. Always getting an idea of the picture, but never the full image. He stops in front of the table, pressing his palms to the wood, leaning on it as he looks at his feet.

‘’ Marco tells me SAMCRO found one of their own. Dead. Seems like the AFT caught wind of that, they’re looking into it. ‘’

‘’ You don't think- ’’

That's it's the same one, you think, the same body, the same one Coco took care of.

‘’ That you killed a Son’s brother? ‘’ He scoffs.

‘’ What? No, I didn’t- ‘’

You didn’t kill a Son. Austin was a nobody, a shit person, a below-average fuck-buddy who couldn’t hold a job, being a gangster would have been too hard on him. He didn’t have any brothers as far as you knew.

‘’ So you’re telling me there wasn’t a dead man in your trunk two months ago? ‘’

‘’ That is not what I’m saying, Gil. I didn’t- shit- I didn’t know he was a rival bike gang! I fucked him and he would buy me weed and- God that sounds wrong, I was not prostituting myself- ‘’

You are standing up at this point, grabbing the ledge of the table so hard your knuckles are white. You can’t breathe and Gil is angry and you know you should take a deep breath and stop this panic attack before it gets a hold of you but you can’t. Your chest hurts and he must have seen how pale you have gotten because he stops, eyes softening. His hand gently grabs your elbow.

‘’ Hey, I’m not mad, okay? Sit down for a second. ‘’

You know he is lying for your sake. Of course he is mad, you can see it, you know that this is enough to start a war, bullets flying, caskets lowered. He slowly moves around the table, pushes you back down on your chair as your head automatically falls in between your knees. Come on, you know this will help bring it down a bit, bring some blood back to your head, deep breath in, deep breath out. You can’t even tell if it’s him or your mind talking to you now.

‘’ I thought it was over. ‘’ you whimper, ‘’ He’s dead and I still can’t get away from him. ‘’

Gil‘s hand is warm on your neck, caressing up your hair and then down your back in slow circles.

‘’ That’s not true, baby. You’re safe here, I got you. ‘’

Baby, baby, baby. It spirals into your head as the floor underneath your feet feels like it’s turning. It takes a few more minutes, for you to finally calm down, for air to come in normally again.

‘’ His name was Austin, a dirtbag from Fresno. I stayed there for like a month, we fucked a few times. ‘’

‘’ You don’t have to tell me- ‘’

‘’ I do. ‘’ you sniff, ‘’ I do because I gotta fix this. I don’t want the club to pick up after me again. ‘’

It feels weird to tell him now, after forcing yourself to forget this moment for weeks, trying not to look Coco in the eyes for too long, afraid he would ask questions you didn’t want to answer. You hadn't told him simply because you didn’t have the guts, the courage to face what had happened. But today you have to do it, tell him the whole story so he can tell you what to do now, like he always does. SAMCRO clearly thinks the Mayans have done it, and they will come for them, for him. He crouches to your level, one knee on the ground, the other one nudging yours. He doesn’t try to pry away your fingers from your face, doesn’t offer reassuring words, but his presence is enough, his hand in your hair is enough.

‘’ One night, he’s pounding on my door. ‘’ You continue. ‘’ He’s on some hard shit, he’s not making sense so I tell him to fuck off, but he doesn’t listen. And then he’s just inside my place, I’m screaming and he’s screaming, I don’t understand, but he’s grabbing my neck.‘’

You can’t see the floor anymore, blurred by all the tears that are pooling up in your eyes. You can hear the blood rushing to your head, the fast thump in your ears. You know Gil’s fingers are shaking against your back, that he is angry he wasn’t there to save you back then, to kill him himself.

‘’ I blinked and then I was there, I wasn’t in California and he was one of them. I could taste the sand in my mouth, Gil, the pain in my shoulder was back and I could smell the bodies- ‘’

You sob, you can’t help it. You know that he understands what you are talking about, those flashbacks that are way too real, where both of you can still feel the blood on your hands. He knows those twelve hours had been the worst of your life, fighting against the gag in your mouth, the burning ropes around your wrists. It had been a miracle they had found you really. Rae bursting through the door, calling for a medic and an evac, while Gil took charge of figuring out if all the blood soaking your uniform was yours.

‘’ I didn’t know he was SAMCRO I promise… ‘’

‘’ I know. ‘’ he sniffs, ‘’ Fuck, I know, baby. ‘’

Baby, baby, baby. His nose is in your hair and your whole world smells like him, his shirt against your forehead, his beard on your cheek. It is a miracle you are still in the kitchen with him, not the basement your mind always brings you back to. Not under the scorching sun, the burning sand that haunts your nights.

‘’ I’ll let Templo know, we’ll deal with them. I’m taking care of it. ‘’

You straighten up at that, looking down at him.

‘’ Don’t. ‘’ You wipe away the tears under your eyes, ‘’ I’ll tell Bishop, it’s my mess, you guys have nothing to do with this. I can’t let them think it was the club. ‘’

‘’ Are you crazy? It’s not going to be only one guy coming for you, it’s gonna be a dozen of ‘em. You need us to protect you. ‘’

You are on your feet before he can react, pressing your palms against your eyes. Your head hurts, you feel numb, you thought you were going to be fine, here, with him, but you can’t escape it, everything always follows you where ever you go, bringing others down with you.

‘’ I don’t need it. I can protect myself. ‘’

‘’ You really think that? ‘’ He scoffs, ‘’ How you gonna do that, hm? You’re going to run away? Again? They’ll find you. ‘’

You feel like you are boiling, water spilling over the pot, hot and sizzling. He is pushing buttons you thought he wouldn’t dare, that you thought stopped hurting two months ago. You are not calm anymore, you are angry, so, so angry.

‘’ I’m a fucking US Army Ranger, Gilbert, you think a bunch of pussies in leather are going to be the end of me?! ‘’

He is up on his feet too, towering over you, chest against yours as it raises up and down.

‘’ You’re being delusional, ranger. ‘’ He bites back, ‘’ You think it’s only you that’s involved in this now? ‘’

He takes another step forward, forcing you to back away, cornering you between him and the wall. He is frowning and you realize he is not angry like you thought he was, he seems confused, appalled at your words.

‘’ You think Jacob is going to understand why you’re not picking him up from school anymore, hm? That Rae is gonna believe whatever lies you feed her? That I- ‘’

He stops at that, tongue rolling inside his mouth. He is looking at you, eyes piercing your walls, destroying the bubble you had tried to put up between you. You know you hurt him, you feel bad, you really do, but aren’t your absence a small price to pay to save their lives?

‘’ Gil- ‘’

‘’ If you want to do it alone, you can. ‘’ He continues, ‘’ You’re right, these guys aren’t trained professionals, but they’re wild dogs. They will bite and won’t let go until you’re dead. ‘’

You don’t like this. You don’t like it because you know what he is saying is true. As much as you would like to think you can do this alone, you simply can’t. No amount of training, hiding or illegal guns could dig you out of this one. You think of Jacob, his sweet face, his twelve years old jokes you don’t find funny but pretend they are. You think of Rae and Ava, all of Gil’s friends. You can’t let this affect them too and have them lose their lives in a war they didn’t even have a say in. You don’t answer him and he takes it as an opportunity to keep going.

‘’ Is that what you really want? To leave after all the hard work you’ve put into making it work here? ‘’

‘’ Of course not. ‘’ Your voice breaks, ‘’ But I fucked up, Gil, and I got to own up to it. You’re always picking up after me, what kind of shit friend am I ?! ‘’

‘’ A friend? ‘’

You can’t meet his eyes, you can’t look at him and see the hurt that must paint his face. You know you are not just a friend, you are not stupid or blind, you know why your heart speeds up every time he gets home, why you miss him when he goes on runs. You know the three words that get stuck in his throat in the late-night hours, when his lips are warm on your jaw, hand curving underneath your knee, words he would whisper if you would let him.

‘’ You’re not just a friend. ‘’

‘’ I know. I’m sorry. ‘’

Please, it means, don’t. You can tell what is coming, what is going through his head. You can see it in his eyes, in how his shoulders are leaning towards you, and you know you can’t take it if he says it today. Your hand presses against his bicep, hopefully soothing whatever fire you started, but he doesn’t allow you to stop him this time.

‘’ You really think I would do all of this if I didn’t- ‘’

Love you. He doesn’t say it, thank god he doesn’t, but you know he wants to. You wish you could think about saying it like he is, so freely, like it wouldn’t tie him down in the same suffocating way it would make you feel. You love him, of course you do, more than friends, more than everyone you have ever loved before, but you can’t tell him. Mostly because it would make it real and offer him the possibility to say no. His hands gently frame your face, bringing your focus back to him.

‘’ I’ve saved you once, I can do it again. ‘’ He is so much closer now, pressing you against his front as his thumbs caress your cheeks. ‘’ Let me do it again. ‘’

He is pleading, begging for you to stay and a part of you thinks he might be scared. Scared of letting go, of what is coming next. Sometimes you wonder if this whole thing with you is about old time's sake and you pray at night that it isn’t, that it’s genuine, a work between faith and pure chance.

He is bringing your head towards his before you can react, lips pressing desperately on yours. It feels like a goodbye kiss, as if it would be the last, a silent answer that he would let you go if you really wished him to. He tastes like coffee, smells like the cigarette he sneaked and smoked on the porch so you wouldn’t catch him.

‘’ Let me help you. ‘’ You whisper when he eventually pulls away. ‘’ Let me make this right. ‘’

He doesn’t answer your demand, doesn’t fight back to tell you he would never let you get in arms way, or say yes and tell you he would supply you the guns himself if needed. He only kisses you again, hands back in your hair, eyes closed. It’s his way of closing the discussion, enough damage done for today, enough pieces picked up for now, nothing that can’t be fixed later. You know it will be a debate for another day, tomorrow morning maybe, after you drop Jacob at school, making a right out of the parking lot and taking the main street straight to the clubhouse. You’ll notice the grease on his cheek as he comes out of the shop, know the words that will come out of his mouth before he even says them, watch as the skin between his brows creases. God damn it, woman.

But right now, you let him lower you on the dinner table, let him kiss you again and again and again. I’m staying, you want him to know, we’ll fight this together. You want to stay in the moment, enjoy what is left of the morning, but you are seeing red, motivated by a rage you thought was long gone. They are family, all of them. You won’t let Austin, or anyone, take them away from you ever again. You make up your mind when you pull Gil’s shirt over his head, hands curling around his shoulders, finger already wrapped around an invisible trigger. SAMCRO won’t even know what hit them.