#Ghouly Answers

[lepitorus]

umm sorry this isnt very specific but it would be really cool if you went into detail about what their dynamic is like ^-^

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ASKING! Sorry it took me so long to get to this! In my mind, Will and Henry meet in college and get along on the basis of both of them being A Little Weird in their own separate ways. Specifically, I think Henry, who is able to more-or-less mask that and fit in, sees himself in Will, who... is not able to, and he ends up growing sort of protective of him. This leads to them becoming friends, and then roommates, and then the two of them being a little too drunk or a little too high one night and Henry kissing William. I don't think William thinks much about his sexuality prior to that. He knows he isn't interested in women the way his peers are, but I think in his mind he attributes that to his workaholic attitude - there's just so many more important things to do than dating, aren't there? - and he already has a complicated jealousy/admiration thing going on for Henry, so being kissed awakens a Lot in him.

Oh, that's an option. Oh, Henry likes him that way. Oh. I don't think they ever have a "proper" relationship in college, just something Vague and Undefined and Kind of Loaded. Still, William clings to it. He begins to view Henry as an extension of himself: they aren't Henry and William anymore, they're Henry-and-William, and he sees no reason not to embrace that. After all, it's gonna be like that forever, right? They love each other, and besides, it's not like they know other queer people!

Meanwhile, Henry, in his mind, is like "well of course I like Will, but there's no way this can be a serious thing, I mean, we're gonna have to get married eventually, haha!" And he likes women too, so like, he has no problem doing that. Lots of nice girls out there. And he just sort of assumes William feels the same way. So that's kind of an issue. Henry starts spending a lot of time with this girl because people are starting to look at them strange but haven't they always looked at them strange? Isn't that why they got along so well in the first place? And then, oh, they're dating. And also apparently this was always going to happen? And Henry's saying this like it's the most natural thing in the world, like it's something they were both supposed to know?

But well, they're still friends, right? (like it could ever go back to that) Yes, of course, he'd love to be Henry's best man! (and throw up in the bathroom at the reception) From there, William's already complicated Henry Emotions spiral further. He hates him. He wants to be him. He wants to be with him. He wants Henry to have nothing. He wants Henry to have nothing but him. You know, normal stuff.

[feralghxuls]

could you tell us abt those teeth thing headcanons you mentioned in the tags? i am v interested

YES I COULD

i am SO glad you asked i love this concept very much

it's based on the way that people who work with big cats will often work with them until the animals allow them to touch their teeth, which is mainly so that they are able to do periodic examinations and so they won't flip out if they need dental work or something like that, but it's also a huge show of trust between animal and handler

for simplicity's sake, i'll go through the ghouls with the idea that it's copia or terzo doing this, with some extras for those who have notably different responses to other ghouls doing this rather than their papa

headcanons about ghouls getting their teefies examined under the cut!

aether is a very good boy, his ears go down a little when copia approaches him with the intent of touching his teeth, but he opens right up when asked and will hold still for as long as he needs to. but he will be whining softly in the back of his throat the whole time, and when he's done he looks a little bit like he's going to cry. it's very stressful for him but he Will Do It when asked

cirrus does not like it AT ALL. copia was shocked when he asked her to open up for him the first time and she pinned her ears and growled at him. he tried to be placating, explaining that it's necessary, but she wasn't having it. they had to call in backup (mountain) to hold her still and even then she was still shrieking and squalling like she's being killed. copia had to learn how to be very quick about it, and the second cirrus gets to have her teeth back she shakes it off and acts like nothing happened at all (only cumulus and mountain have any chance at touching her teeth without it being a full-on fight for their lives)

cumulus is very cooperative! she kinda really loves it actually, she already has her mouth wide open and teeth bared for examining before copia even gets close enough to touch, all ^.^ cause she knows she's got good teeth and that the others aren't quite as willing. and also, she'll never admit it but she likes the attention and the praise when copia says her teeth are surprisingly much sharper than they look (he definitely nicked his fingers the first time and she kissed it better)

dew is...temperamental, to no one's surprise. when copia approaches to examine his teeth, the phrase "if looks could kill" still doesn't scratch the surface of the death glare dew gives him. he scowls and growls and resists when copia slips his thumb into the side of his mouth, but he's surprisingly patient once he's in there. dew won't allow it forever, so copia has to be pretty quick about it or he definitely will lose fingers. there's also plenty of times when dew straight up refuses, and they have to call in aether or rain to pry his mouth open and hold him still

with terzo he was a little more willing, partly because terzo spent the whole time telling him how pretty and sharp his teeth are & he took pride in that. it took several months before he allowed terzo to touch his teeth though, and even longer with copia

mountain keeps up a low, terrifying growl the entire time copia approaches, ears pinned and everything, but the second copia starts to reach for his mouth he opens it himself rather than having to be made to open up. he still keeps up that growl but surprisingly, he's willing to hold still for as long as copia wants to poke around in there (after copia figured that part out, there was one time he spent quite a while, absolutely fascinated by how sharp mountain's molars are and his sets of long double canines)

rain doesn't like this at all. he will cooperate, because he respects and trusts copia, and he won't growl or anything but his mouth does start to slowly close down the longer copia takes, a subtle threat to hurry the fuck up or lose a finger. there's been a few close calls where copia wasn't paying enough attention (too focused on all the little razor sharp needle teeth between rain's canines and how it kinda looks like he's got two rows...) and had to jerk his hand back at the last second. as soon as copia's done, rain skitters off to go recover from the whole ordeal. swiss has special teeth touching privileges though, and rain accepts this from him with great affection.

swiss is surprisingly squirmy about it. he wants to be good, he really does, but there's just something about the feeling of fingers on his teeth that he really can't stand. especially when copia rubs across his molars, he's accidentally bitten down on him before (not enough to draw blood, and he apologized abundantly after, but. oops. copia is more gentle in the future). he definitely clings to copia's arm while his hand is in his mouth, and his tail is a damn weapon to anyone within range. copia wishes he could spend more time looking at swiss's teeth though, because he, like mountain, also has double canines, the outside ones not quite as long as mountain's but just as sharp. when he is done, he steps back and licks over his teeth & lips like a dog who's just been given a spoonful of peanut butter (which copia privately thinks its fricken adorable)

stratus likes to snap her teeth as copia approaches, but she's also grinning like a little imp. she thinks it's funny how he flinches a little and pretends like he doesn't, but when it comes down to it she opens wide and even pulls her tongue out of the way for him. but it's a bit of a trap; she won't fully chomp down on him, but she does gnaw on his hand while he's trying to feel around in her mouth. mostly she doesn't draw blood, but she does have lots of sharp little teeth like a kitten, so it happens on accident. don't worry though, she always licks it better (no matter how many times copia gently tries to explain to her that the healing properties of ghoul saliva doesn't really work on humans)

BONUS

alpha will absolutely refuse to let terzo anywhere near his mouth, except to bite him. (that's his story, anyway. they'll take it to their graves but he does let terzo check his teeth as long as there's absolutely no chance anyone else is anywhere nearby). he puts up a good fight with secondo but eventually relents, because secondo doesn't hesitate to get mean as fuck about it. and he doesn't get a choice with primo. with primo, he hardly gets the chance to think about it, the old man is extremely spry and very good at lulling alpha into the false complacency with conversation, and then he springs it on alpha and the whole thing is over before he even processes what happened.

(and just for shits and giggles, and because i have been talking about them lately: he growls and glares the whole time when swiss pries his mouth open, putting up a good front. but he always lets swiss poke around in his mouth for as long as he wants and he always opens up on the first ask. (this wasn't true the first time, or several times after that; he put up a good fight but swiss eventually won, because he always does))

omega is a good boy for terzo and only terzo. even then he still resists a little, tipping his head up out of reach until terzo reaches up to slip his thumb into the corner of his mouth, and once he gets his mouth open, he's very good and patient, doesn't even whine like aether. with secondo, he definitely resists a bit more, tossing his head around even as he verbally agrees to open up, he won't at first. again though, good boy once his mouth is open. primo asks him once, and barely gives him the chance to answer before he does the same thing he does to alpha, quick as a damn snake and it's over before he knows it. though sometimes primo will spend a while exploring inside his mouth, he mostly is just very deft and professional about it.

ifrit is the goodest boy. he loves having his teeth examined and likes to follow terzo's fingers around in his mouth with his tongue, fascinated to feel what terzo is feeling. he always asks if he passed after, and terzo smiles at him and says his teeth are in excellent form as always. sometimes he tracks down his bestie swisstopher and just goes :V at him until swiss pokes around in his mouth and ifrit purrs at him the whole time. he loves it.

mist is okay with it, you have to catch her in the right mood (which terzo has terrible luck with). he learned quickly that if she's not having it, it's best to give up and try again later because he's liable to lose half his fingers and his bassist if he pushes it. if she is in a cooperative mood though, she's still not exactly nice about it. she gives him a nasty side-eye the whole time and barely opens her mouth wide enough for him to get a couple fingers in there. however, she almost always will let omega into her mouth, so terzo mostly just lets him handle that. they have a weird relationship, built on high levels of mutual respect while also keeping each other in check & being unafraid to call each other on their shit.

chAir is an absolute monster if anyone but ifrit tries to open his mouth, and even then he Grumbles and growls about how ridiculous and demeaning this is. ifrit just shrugs and keeps at it, says it's important and has to be done, a ghoul's teeth are vital organs. to which chAir scoffs and mutters something about doubting whether or not ifrit would even know if anything is amiss if he thinks teeth are organs. (ifrit and chAir also have a strange relationship, in which ifrit adores chAir and chAir is a grumpy old man who begrudgingly accepts ifrit's affections)

terzo tries to insist that his human dentist knows what they're doing, but omega insists he hush and let him look. he is fascinated by terzo's blunt molars and his tiny, cute little canines, and spends quite some time running his fingertips over the smooth edges of his teeth until terzo's jaw aches.

copia thinks it's very sweet of his ghouls to try to check his teeth, but he also has a dentist and can they please do this one at a time and not four of them at once. mountain wants to know how his eensy flat molars chew anything at all, stratus says that he ought to sharpen his teeth more often and is puzzled when copia explains that it doesn't work like that. swiss spends a while prodding at the sharpest edges he can find and laments that he can't get any of them to prick his fingertips, and how it must be difficult for copia to live like this, unable to bite his partners effectively. dew thinks copia is doing this for attention (he also wants to poke around in copia's mouth, but he'll never admit it).

[choppedsheeptragedy]

Hiii! your artwork is incredible!!

Would you be able to draw some jdronica fluff?

🫶

some jdronica fluff, right outta the oven

[rebelichor]

Ariadne is by no means a professional special effects makeup artist, but if your character asked her to "help them with a look" she will practice what they want for the days or weeks in advance and then absolutely nail it day of.

[soft-girl-musings]

26 and 30 for Music! 🎺🤘

BET ok

26: Is there/what is a song that you always associate with a movie or tv show?

bestie i think you sent me down a mandela effect spiral bc for years i had the faintest memory of iris (goo goo dolls) being in the movie Treasure Planet but then i watched it on disney+ last year and i the song i'm still here (another banger) was there instead... ik the same dude wrote both songs and they sound super similar so that's probably why i conflated em between watches lol

30: Do you sing along to songs in the car? In the shower? other places?

oh all the time, it's why i hate having other people in the car while i drive. singing helps manage my road anxiety and it's why i don't mind commuting 25+ minutes to work most days. most days if i'm alone, i'm singing.

send in some music asks!

[buryme--inblack]

How do you feel about chicken nuggets (this is a very important question.)

UHHHHHHHHHHH

uh, uh, uh, uh, uh (uhhh) uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh uh, uh, uh, uh, uh (uhhh) uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh /lyr

[nastyburger]

A what-if because your Dannyverse AU has sent my thoughts spinning! I adore it!

I'm unsure if Vlad would be as obsessed with Danny in Ghouly's universe because he's not a halfa. Maybe he still is or becomes so, maybe it encompasses Jazz because they're both Maddie's children.

So what if one evolution Vlad's character - getting worse - has him try to turn Danny (and Jazz) into another halfa? He has proof with Tucker that it's possiblel to create more. This creates a parallel to Mourner's verse where Vlad creates a clone of Danny to get into Maddie's good graces.

But also the image that Ghoulyverse Vlad tries to villain-mentor both Tucker and Danny is amazing.

i think i have stated before that vlad isnt as interested in danny in the ghouly universe before, but i do like the angle of him attempting to turn either danny or jazz into a halfa! makes sense if vlad was trying to steal jack's life kids and all instead of just having it be about maddie. i feel like the whole cloning thing wouldnt happen at all in the ghoulyverse, vlad jumping ship on trying to connect with tucker by trying to turn one of the fenton kids would probably be just his version of that lol.

[goldenspirits]

BOO! SCARY GHOST JUMPSCARE! CREEPY GOO! UNEXPLAINED ECTOPLASM DRIPPING FROM THE CEILING! Also in case you're wondering who could POSSIBLY have sent such a scary ask keep guessing because my name is not a drink

[carefulfears]

this dramatic ass blog post on ghouli.net about scully's eyes...mulder's kid fr

[paramcur]

THE HAPPIEST OF BIRTHDAYS TO YOU <333 LITERALLY WISHING YOU A YEAR FULL OF LOVE, LUCK, & ABUNDANCE !! MAY ALL YOUR WISHES COME TRUE <3 sending you nothing but good vibes truly 🤭💕

DKHGKDFHGKDFH JULIE ILYSM ... THANK U !! and yes i am doing the same .. manifesting Nothing but good and peaceful, RESTFUL vibes for all of us rn .. we're off to a rough start but im gonna make this yr my bitch , god & my health permitting 😔✊

[little-eye-guy]

figured out how to set up a custom app icon so i'm considering finally updating this godforsaken app, since i can continue seeing the ghoulie instead of whatever uncool icon they have now

only problem is it has to be done through the shortcuts app which, every time you click the shortcut, gives you a quick drop down notification letting you know that yep, this is a shortcut :)

[my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction]

Do you think any of the OI characters could be convinced to put on a sexy nurse outfit, while taking care of their sick partner?

I am giggling! (I really tried not to just be like YES to all of them, but I am a weak, weak person.)

oscar isaac charcters x GN!Reader • Rating: 18+ •Masterlist• ao3• want to be tagged? | requestinfo• ko-fi • ask-travaganza masterlist •

Warnings: silliness, references to sexy times

Word Count: 465

_____________________________________

Steven: Giggles the whole time, and puts on a fantastically over the top accent to go with the new character he’s created. You have to kiss him to shut him up when he starts quoting Carry On, Doctor.

Marc: Will put on the outfit and make you take your medicine and go to sleep. “I’m taking care of you, so you feel better, why did you want something else?” Is a little shit about it until you beg him for kisses.

Jake: No sooner than the words are out of your mouth, he’s already scrambling to get changed. Nurse Lockley is here with medicine (his dick) and to take care of you (fuck your brains out if you’re up to it.) 

Nathan: Nathan ‘I’m not putting that fucking thing on’ Bateman. Getting all grumpy and muttering under his breath. The second you are out of the room though and (preferably) laying down, he’s knocking on the door in the most outrageous outfit you’ve ever seen and telling you he’s ‘been hired by Dr Bateman to take care of you’.

Anselm: You never have to even bring up the idea, because Anselm has already dressed up for you in a nurse’s outfit many times. (He has several for different occasions, but tends to prefer a custom made latex one that is skin tight and crotchless.) 

Cecil: Thinks the idea is hilarious and gets a little too into character. Tries to wear a pair of very high heels and you just about manage to convince him to take them off before he falls over and gives himself a concussion. 

Club!Blue: Doesn’t mind dressing up at all and is far too into it. (If a guard knocks on his office door, he will be answering it in full costume and with his cock out.)

Orderly!Blue: Please do not encourage this man. 

Jack: Has a disturbingly realistic outfit with blood stains that you do NOT want to ask where they came from. 

Santiago: Takes some convincing because it makes him feel a little self conscious, but he wants to try to not only cheer you up but also to get over some insecurities and he knows he’s safe with you.

Shimmer!Kane: Puts it on without a second thought, clothes are clothes, right? However he does like that it makes you happy. 

King John: Even though this is not historically time period accurate, I can’t help myself - he’s gonna fuck you in a plague doctor mask. I’m sorry.

Rydal: Will be a brat about it, because he wants you to spank him in the outfit.

Laurent: Starts going on about how he’s a ‘wet nurse’ and keeps shoving his boobs in your face.

Poe: As if this man doesn’t have 400 outfits on hand at all times.

_________________

Thank you for reading!

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[starberry-cupcake]

We're back! again, if these silly recaps help lift your mood in any way, it makes me very happy ♥ I baked chocolate chip cookies for this so imagine I'm sharing them with you 🍪

previously, in harrowcita del 9:

this happened

also @unexpected-tigers linked me to an official house quiz and I did it so, if you want to know what I got and how I answered, I'll add it under "read more" after the recap

CHAPTER 44

listen, I need to start listing things I got right and things I got wrong but I forget at this point what I said

you're gonna have to remind me if I got something right and I didn't catch it because I remember what I got wrong more easily than what I got right

such is life

I'll do my best to try to tally but

I got wrong the narrator, I assumed that, because they were insulting harrow, it might be harrow too

but I forgot about gideon also being a pro at insulting harrow so, guess what?

IT WAS GIDEON

WELCOME BACK, BABE, WE MISSED YOU

CRYING TEARS OF JOY

of actual joy, not mercygirl-joy

to be fair, the narration was very different from gideon's perspective, to account for 1) the twist and 2) the fact that gideon's gideon-ness came out more and more as she got closer to the surface of perception in harrow's body

something she kind of explains later

but yeah, I got that wrong

however, I did get the purgatory situation of canaan house somewhat right and I forgot to mention it last time

ANYWAY, BACK TO GIDEON

CUE 'I AM THE BEST' BY 2NE1 IN THE BACKGROUND

someone stabbed harrow from the back, which is very shitty behavior from whoever it was

so gideon comes back into the real world with the immediate danger of her vessel, necromancer and partner in crime having been stabbed

and she was "left behind" because harrow is back in her canaan purgatory river bubble

with her ghostie ghoulie friends

gideon immediately finds out that harrow can't fight for shit

she's determined to kick the stabber's ass but it's gonna be hard when she's used to her massive guns and ninja warrior disposition and she's inside the body of a baby kitten

gideon's very eloquent commentary is "Fuck. Oh, shit. Oh, fucking hell. Help. Yuck. Aaaargh."

it's so nice to have her back :')

she's talking to harrow in the second person, as she's been doing all this time unbeknownst to those of us who didn't catch it

"which proves that you can put the swordfighter into the necromancer but you can't, wait, hang on"

god, I missed her

gideon is also coming to terms with the fact that harrowcita has regenerating abilities now

she is very angry at the awful state in which her two handed sword is

if you knew, gideon, about the relationship between harrow and your sword and how layered it was...

"Harrowhark, I gave you my whole life and you didn't even want it"

so gideon starts taking control of the situation because the beast is chasing them

absolutely no chill over here in the emperor's bolthole

and by "them" I mean gideon and harrow because idk where the everliving fuck everyone else is

I know the emperor is hiding in weenie hut jr but the rest are supposed to be fighting

except for whoever was going around stabbing people

and idk where not!dulcinea is at this point either

maybe someone's using her to stab harrow idk, I'll never stop blaming her for things, even indirectly

gideon is doing a great job with what she has available because she's "a good girl and you're an evil nun"

she's also still going on about harrow leaving her behind and saying "you never got rid of being so absolutely fucking goddamn sad"

chisus christ gideon, tell us how you really feel about her

gideon looks at herself in the mirror and sees harrow with her eyes and her expressions, which is very uncanny valley

"This was your shell, but it was all filled up with me. God, the double entendres were hard to resist"

yandere twin would appreciate that one, I think, maybe

gideon proceeds to taunt harrow to come back by using her voice to say things like "Oooooh, Palamedes. I am measurably less intelligent than you. Put your tongue in my mouth and I'll flop my tongue against it."

"Ohhhhhrr, Gideon. I was so dumb to think a tub of ancient freezer meat was my girlfriend. Please show me how to do a press-up. Also, I'm very obviously attracted to y—"

no no, by all means, go on

please, gideon, go on with that idea, let's see where it takes us

in other important but not as spicy events

gideon cuts the beast thing in two with her own sword

but now we've got the heralds to go through

"Don't worry, honey. I'll keep the home fires burning."

same energy as

CHAPTER 45

we're back in hotel california canaan house au river bubble

I'm sure that description makes it all super clear for anyone reading

abby and her hubby are taking harrowcita to the secret hideout of the lost boys aka the room behind the tapestry that is now untouched by the body horrors going on in this version of canaan house

and where all our ghostie ghoulie friends are hanging out

it was a person's room, says harrow, and I think we all know it was alleged gideon's aka ortus, but we'll get to that

I need to point out the fact that harrow says she always thought not!dulcinea showed signs of "suppurating ego" but that she could never convince gideon to "see past the appealing eyes and softly clinging dresses"

I KNOW, GIRL, IT DROVE ME FERAL TOO

apparently harrowcita's invite also got to the kids of the fourth but abby sent them back to the river with a kiss in the forehead and their lunch packed

because she had adopted them, as we all know

she said "if only Silas had asked me, what has happened to his soul worries me horribly"

of course I didn't remember that silas was mayonnaise uncle and had to do math for a while in my head

maybe he's out there looking for duracell bunny nephew's soul that is still travelling through the river

abby learned a way to send them back into the river but everyone present wants to help deal with this haunt situation harrow's got going on

honestly, props to martita for hanging around, judith is a lot less cooperative

abby also thinks there's something wrong with the river and that the emperor is unaware of it because he doesn't know about the river beyond

she has studied a lot about it

and that the fact that the "beyond the river" concept has been looked at with scorn by everyone for so long has made the potential studies of it stagnant

I love her a lot at this point

I mean, I'm still 100% a camilla girlie, I'm putting camilla's photo in one of those glittery clear files and covering it with heart stickers, don't get me wrong, but this woman is fierce af

abby, you know more than the emperor, you're more worthy than he is, please murder him

NOW IT'S TIME TO GET EMOTIONAL

GRAB YOUR TISSUES

IT'S ORTUS TIME

man, ortus won me with this chapter, he's great, let's keep him

let him be happy in the infinity of time with his fifth polycule

harrow tries to tell him that he doesn't have to apologize to her, that she owes him for crux murdering him and his mom

(interlude for "her unconscious gracelessness to Camilla Hect; a girl whom, in reality, she should have taken by the hands and thanked her profusely for every time she tried to save her cavalier")

(glad we're in agreement there)

they talk about how gideon died and ortus tells harrow that gideon never did anything without intent

"she had been outplayed by Palamedes Sextus, outgunned by Cytherea the First, undone by Gideon Nav"

damn, harrow

LISTEN TO THIS PART YOU FOLKS

"I should have offered help. I should have died for you. Gideon should still be alive. I was, and am, a grown man, and you both were neglected children."

ORTUS, MY MAN

THIS MADE ME SO EMOTIONAL

"she and Gideon had become women before their time, and watched each other's childhood crumble away like so much dust. But there was a part of her soul that wanted to hear it —wanted to hear it from Ortus's lips more, even than from the lips of God. He had been there. He had witnessed."

"I will hope better for heroism in my death"

ORTUS I'M HOLDING YOU TIGHT AND CARESSING THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD LIKE A PUPPY

harrow finds the "g&p" note

GUESS WHAT

GUESS WHO WAS RIGHT ABOUT THAT

ALLEGED GIDEON IS ACTUAL GIDEON THE FIRST

AND HARROW THINKS OUR GIDEON WAS NAMED AFTER HIM

I mean I had trust in my alleged gideon theory BUT I CAN'T BELIEVE I CALLED THE OTHER PART MAYBE TOO???

sixth house please accept me

she also finds another note, similar to the rant notes she had been finding, which reads: "the only thing our civilisation can ever learn from yours is that when our backs are to the wall and our towers are falling all around us and we are watching ourselves burn we rarely become heroes"

are the letters clues on the angry spirit that's haunting harrow?????

does it relate to gideon???

but when harrow is about to ask ortus about gideon ("less like tragedy and more like carelessness" 👀) abby interrupts

abby, interrupting me again when I'm getting to the good stuff

but I can't be angry at her because she says she'll exorcise the Sleeper

YOU GO ABBY, YOU LORRAINE WARREN THAT STUFF

And that's where we leave it for today!!! my willpower is strong and I know I can't make these too annoyingly long. Which is why, if you wanna know how I did with the House quiz, look after "read more". If not, see you for the next one!!! Super soon!!! Sending you all hugs in these difficult times ♥

So, this is the quiz that I did, the official author-made one.

I GOT *drumroll* A TIE BETWEEN THE SIXTH AND THE FOURTH

The author said that, in the event of a tie "Pick the House descriptor most like yourself, or most like the person you secretly wish you were, or with the colours you like best."

We all absolutely know where I'm going if I'm left to pick between those two.

To be totally transparent, I'm gonna show you my very messy notes, which I wasn't initially planning on showing, so I apologize for them not being neat and tidy. I added the skull I have in my desk as aesthetic compensation for the messy handwriting.

I picked 1st the pen and flimsy because, if I'm doomed and this is it for me, I want to go out writing. The bottle, because I considered a vessel for separating things or for keeping something in safely would be useful. The rapier, because I always take a swiss army knife in my purse with my keys and the rapier was the closest thing to that. The flare gun, because I might as well try to signal somehow, at least some of us could get saved. And the raft not to try to escape, like the answer said, but because if we're more than one person in the boat, having more space, even if somewhat leaky, could help out for different situations.

I did consider every potential option that could be turned into food but I'd rather die of something else than food poisoning of any kind.

I got the Fifth in second place, and I wouldn't have minded if I got the Fifth, honestly. In 3rd place I got Seventh and Eighth as a tie, I'm not gonna ask about that. The Second got fourth place, the Third got fifth and 0 points for the Ninth, I'm so sorry.

You should have seen my face when I saw a portrait of the Emperor was an option to take with you lmao

[choppedsheeptragedy]

Do you like goats? If so, draw JD as one pls.

alright anon, i'm sure Neither of these were what you had in mind, but here you go

[nellasbookplanet]

Book recs: monster/creature friendships

Do you like movies like Alien vs Predator, Venom, and Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes? Do you enjoy dragon riders and talking animal companions? Friendly yet deeply inhuman aliens? Monster children and monster parents? Consider yourself less of a monster fucker and more of a monster best friend? Watch horror movies and fantasize about befriending the horrifying ghosts and ghoulies? Then this is the list for you!

A note: some of these books do have romance subplots, but not as the most important relationship or focus.

A (second) note: the criteria for "monster" are subjective. I looked mainly for titles featuring creatures who neither look nor act/think human. In cases where they are more human looking, I wanted a distinctly inhuman mind and morality, meaning most books featuring vampires, werewolves, fey, etc are excluded. I may have included books you feel aren't monstrous enough, or excluded ones you feel are sufficiently monstrous but I don't agree about. Again, it’s subjective.

Feel free to leave your own recs in the notes, but please know that if you rec books featuring mostly human vampires and werewolves I will be judging. I have separate lists for those, go look there instead.

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!

Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir*

Ryland Grace just woke up from a coma, unable to remember anything. He finds himself alone on a space ship, and as his memories slowly trickle back, he realizes he’s been sent on a mission: to find a solution to the impending doom of the earth. Still struggling with holes in his memories, Ryland tries to fulfill his mission, but as he gets closer to his goal, he discovers someone else got there first. And they aren’t anything close to human. Funny, heartfelt, and heavy on the science.

Fragment by Warren Fahy*

The reality TV show Sealife is having a rough time - as it turns out, a ship full of scientists doesn’t make for the kind of drama they hoped for. Hoping for some excitement, they reach Hender’s Island, a fragment of a lost continent that may contain an interesting new ecosystem. But as they step foot on the island, they quickly come to realize the ecosystem isn’t just new, it’s highly dangerous and very hungry. Among all this life is one single species that may be more dangerous than any other, but which may also be the salvation of the scientists on the island. A bit wonky, but genuinely one of the most fun books I have read, I love it so much.

The Road to Roswell by Connie Willis*

Francie has just traveled to Roswell to attend her college friend’s wedding to a UFO conspiracist. Not a believer herself, Francie is shocked when she finds herself abducted by an alien. Her abductor is not much what popular media would have you believe, looking more like a tumbleweed than a grey alien, and is clearly on some kind of mission it isn’t willing to put on hold for the sake of Francie attending to her duties as a bridesmaid. As more people get roped along - among those a conman, an old lady, a ufo conspiracist, and a retiree with an RV - Francie finds herself getting closer to the alien and wanting to help it succeed.

The Last Human by Zack Jordan

Young adult. Sarya is a human - the only one of her kind. Living with her adoptive mother - a vicious, insectile alien - on a space station surrounded by hundreds of other alien species, Sarya spends every day staying below the radar and hiding her true identity. But when an odd new alien arrives on the station, she may finally get an answer to her biggest question: why humanity was deemed too dangerous to be allowed to exist.

Alien vs. Predator: Prey by Steve Perry & S.D. Perry*

On desert planet Ruyshi, businesswoman Machiko Noguchi is about to take over the leading position in a small human colony. Her job is made infinitely harder when the colony comes under attack on two fronts as two species of vicious aliens choose it as their battle ground. If you're reading this list, you probably already know of the movie by the same name. The book, while completely different in setting and cast, does feature many similar plot points, among those a third act team-up between a human woman and a murderous alien.

Children of Time by Adrian Tchaikovsky*

Millenia and generation spanning scifi. After the collapse of an empire, a planet once part of a project to uplift other species to sentience is left to develop on its own, resulting not in the intelligent monkeys once intended but in sentient giant spiders. Millenia later, what remains of humanity arrives looking for a new home, only to be met by the artificial remains of the ancient woman who once led the uplift project - and she is not willing to let them on her planet.

The Moon and the Sun by Vonda N. McIntyre

You can’t go wrong with a Vonda McIntyre novel just, like, in general. This one is set in 17th century France, where a young woman and her brother travel to live at the royal court, where they are to care for and study a strange captured sea monster fabled to have the ability to grant eternal life. A lot of focus on court politics as well as the cultural and biological differences between the humans and the mermaid. Also available as a movie (but it’s not very good, please just read the book).

Winter Tide by Ruthanna Emrys*

Lovecraftian fishpeople! Aphra and her brother are the only survivors after the government raided their home, Innsmouth. Their only living family are the amphibian people of the deep, whom they will one day join, but until then they are bound to land where they struggle to build new lives for themselves after the great loss of their home and loved ones. Then rumors start to spread of a russian agent seeking dangerous and ancient magic, forcing Aphra to involve herself as they try to stop it. Does contain horror elements but is generally a much more optimistic look on cosmic horror than most lovecraftian stories, told from the perspective of one of his monsters. Lots of focus on found family and rebuilding of community.

The Doors of Eden by Adrian Tchaikovsky*

The Doors of Eden is something of an experiment in speculative biology, featuring versions of Earth in which various different species were the one to rise to sentience, from dinosaurs to neanderthals. Now, something is threatening the existence of all timelines, dragging multiple different people and species into the struggle, among those a pair of cryptid hunting girlfriends and a transgender scientist. Together, can they find a way to save the multiverse?

The Spider and Her Demons by sydney khoo*

Young adult. All teenager Zhi wants is a normal life (and possibly for her harsh aunt to be a bit nicer), but it’s hard when she’s half spider demon. Every day she must conceal her true nature and hide in human guise. When she slips up and eats a man in front of her rich, aloof classmate Dior, Zhi thinks her life is over. But Dior has secrets of her own, and she is dead set on making herself a part of Zhi's life.

Vespertine by Margaret Rogerson

Young adult fantasy. Artemisia prefers the dead to the living, and is training to become a Gray Sister, a nun who helps the souls of the deceased pass on to the afterlife rather than remain as dangerous spirits. To defend her convent, Artemisia accepts the help of a dangerous revenant, a powerful spirit which grants her great power but also could possess her the moment her guard is lowered. As evil threatens her homeland, Artemisia and the revenant must find a way to work together.

Slewfoot: a Tale of Bewitchery by Brom

Historical horror. Young Englishwoman Abitha has only recently arrived and married into a Puritan colony when she unexpectedly becomes a widow. As she strives to save her small farm from going under in the wake of tragedy, something dark and dangerous stalks the surrounding woods. He doesn't know whether he's spirit, devil, or god, doesn't even know his own name, and in requesting Abitha's help, both their lives are changed forever.

Lycanthropy and Other Chronic Illnesses by Kristen O'Neal*

Young adult. Priya had plans to go to Stanford, but is derailed when the fallout from lyme disease puts her back, making her question if she'll ever get back to normal. Luckily she has her discord support group with whom she can chat and vent about her illness. Even more - she has Brigid, online fandom friend and fellow chronic illness sufferer. But when Brigid disappears from the web without warning, Priya must drive to Pennsylvania to make sure her friend is okay - and finds that Brigid's condition is a bit hairier than she expected.

Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson

Young adult. Elisabeth is a librarian, trained to handle grimoires - books of magic which, if mishandled, can turn into horrifying monsters. When an act of sabotage leads to the release of one of the library's most dangerous grimoires, Elisabeth finds herself implicated in the crime. Forced to team up with an enemy sorcerer and his loyal and unpredictable demon servant, Elisabeth sets out to find out the truth of what happened.

The Girl With All the Gifts by M.R. Carey

In a post apocalyptic, zombie-infested wasteland, a group of characters try to stay alive and hope to find a cure. One of the characters is Melanie, a young girl who carries the contagion inside of her and hungers for flesh, but like many children of the apocalypse has kept her humanity. Is she and children like her the answer to the cure we are looking for? Or are they the start of something entirely new? This book has also been adapted as a movie!

Malevolent by Harlan Guthrie*

Lovecraftian horror mystery. Private detective Arthur Lester wakes up in his office, his partner dead, memories fuzzy, vision gone, and the voice of a malevolent entity in his mind. Unable to see, Arthur is forced to rely on guidance from the entity as he attempts to solve the mystery of what it is and where it came from. Is this a book? No. But as someone who reads mostly audiobooks, the difference between a book and a fiction podcast is negligible, and also I love this story and its characters and want all of you to do so too.

Parasyte by Hitoshi Iwaka*

Horror manga, heavy on the bodyhorror. Shinichi Izumi wakes one day after a strange dream: that an alien parasite crawled into his arm. Soon he realizes it was more real than dream, and that an inhuman creature, having failed to eat and take over his brain, now controls his arm. Forced to cooperate, the two do their best to survive as more parasites quietly infiltrate society, meaning to devour our entire species. Also available as a very faithful anime!

Skulduggery Pleasant by Derek Landy*

Young adult. Twelve-year-old Stephanie Edgley's uncle, famed horror writer, just died mysteriously and left her his entire fortune. As it turns out, the stories he wrote weren't entirely made up, and that which killed him wasn't entirely human. In trying to avenge his death, Stephanie joins forces with Skulduggery Pleasant, sorcerer, detective, and living, walking skeleton.

The Cloud Roads by Martha Wells

Moon doesn't know what he is. Having lost his family young he lives on the move, shifting his shape to hide his true form. The only ones similar to himself he's ever encountered are the vicious, bloodthirsty Fell, but he knows he cannot be one of them. When chance leads to a meeting with someone like him, he hopes his days of loneliness are over. But his new people stand against a dangerous enemy, and not all of them welcome Moon's help. A departure from other titles on this list in that it features only creatures, with not a single human on page.

The Girl From the Well by Rin Chupeco

Young adult horror. Okiku died three hundred years ago, her body thrown down a well. Now she spends her days hunting for and punishing murderers like the one who once killed her. When a strange boy bearing odd tattoos appears in her area, he catches Okiku's attention - as does something that follows after him. To save the boy, Okiku will be drawn into a journey taking both of them from American suburbia to a faraway shrine in Japan.

Monstrilio by Gerardo Sámano Córdova

When Magos loses her son Santiago to a longtime illness, she loses herself to grief and cuts out a piece of his lung. After hearing old folktales, she begins feeding it - and is shocked to find it growing and alive. Soon finding herself in charge of a hungry and bloodthirsty creature, Magos and her family must come together to care for what they can only see as a second chance for Santiago.

Semiosis by Sue Burke

A generational story following a group of humans trying to survive on a new planet, where a strange and unkowable intelligence is finding ways to use them to its whims. As the humans come across an abandoned city wrapped in the roots of a strange plant, they slowly come to the realization that mutual communication is the only path to peace and survival. Meanwhile, the alien finds itself tied all the more tightly to the growing human community.

The Stardust Grail by Yume Kitasei

Maya Hoshimoto used to be an art thief, and a damned good one to, until a disastrous heist made her retire into academia, hoping for peace and coping with an alien disease which causes her to see glimpses of the future. When an old friend tracks her down and asks her help to find and steal a legendary artifact that could save his entire species, Maya is convinced to do one last job.

Magical Girl Dandelion by Mizuho Kaeru

Manga. Tanpopo Ohanami's parents were killed by a phantom monster when she was young, but her life was saved by Shade, another phantom. Ever since then, Shade has been her friend, watching over her and keeping her safe. But then Tanpopo is revealed to be a potential magical girl, meant to fight the phantoms and protect humanity. Her and Shade are meant to be enemies, but can they instead work and fight alongside each other?

His Majesty's Dragon by Naomi Novik

It’s the height of the Napoleonic Wars, and soldiers on dragon back fight each other in the air. Will Laurence isn't a dragonrider but a sea captain, but when his ship captures a French frigate and discovers a dragon egg about to hatch in his cargo, his life changes forever when he and the dragon hatchling bond.

The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman

Middle grade. In Lyra's world, every person has a daemon: a talking animal companion who follows them throughout life. When children begin being stolen off the street, among them Lyra's friend, she must embark on a great journey to save him, taking her to the furthest north - and beyond.

A Redtail's Dream by Minna Sundberg*

Graphic novel inspired by Finnish mythology. When an irresponsible fox spirit accidentally traps an entire town in the dreamlands, it’s up to slacker Hannu and his talking, shapeshifting dog Ville to save everyone. Together the unwilling heroes must travel the dreamlands and locate the townsfolk, returning them to the waking world before the fox spirit sends them all on to death to hide his mistake. While the physical copy is all but impossible to get a hold of, the original webcomic can still be read for free here.

[mxtxfanatic]

For Love of the Patriarch

How caring as Wei Wuxian is towards the dead is how protective of him the dead are even outside of moments where he feels threatened. Here are some of my favorite instances of the girlies and ghoulies baring their fangs for their Yiling Patriarch:

The curvature of Wei WuXian’s lips dropped slightly as he glanced at him. Jiang Cheng had also heard the dissonant tone, “Second Young Master Lan, what do you mean by this?” Lan WangJi’s eyes were glued to Wei WuXian, “Answer me.” The ghoul child and the blue-faced woman began to stir. Wei WuXian turned around and looked at them. They backed off slowly, reluctant, and sunk into the darkness.

—Chapt. 62: Evil, exr

As he expected, Lan WangJi said, slowly, “You should not accompany yourself with inhuman beings for so long.” The smiles of the girls who were tittering around Wei WuXian immediately disappeared. The gauze curtains swayed, at times blocking out the sunlight. The pavilion shifted between light and dark. Now, their snow-white cheeks seemed a bit too pale, so drained of blood that they almost seemed ashen. Their eyes were glued to Lan WangJi as well. Out of the blue came a chilling eeriness. Wei WuXian lifted his hand, gesturing for them to move to the side. ... Without waiting for him to finish talking, Wei WuXian’s expression changed. He suddenly stood up, “Lan Zhan!” Behind him, red light had begun to glow within the eyes of the girls. Wei WuXian, “Stop it.” Thus, the girls lowered their heads and retreated, but still they stared unwaveringly at Lan WangJi.

—Chapt. 71: Departure, exr

Even if one were to argue that the ghoul child and the blue-faced woman are protective over Wei Wuxian because he summoned them to fight, the same cannot be said for the ghost girls in the pavilion who were summoned solely for companionship. Yet both groups respond the same to perceiving Wei Wuxian as unhappy, as if they have a vested interest in his happiness. A man that can inspire loyalty and care in the living and dead is truly one of one!