#GUESS WHO LOST HER SHIT
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CAN I NOT GET A FUCKING HEART ATTACK FOR ONE HOUR
FFS
#loosing my shit#just as i thought i had found them#cat licked the flea medicine application and was foaming from the mouth#from what i learned it's not dangerous and the foaming is more from the awful taste#but GUESS WHO DIDN'T KNOW THAT#GUESS WHO LOST HER SHIT#GUESS WHO RAN THROUGH THE INTERNET AND MY POOR WORK FOR ANY INFO#...#anyway it's been half an hour#kitty seems fine#i'm gonna finish my gunpla while checking on her and hope she's chill#actually i think she is#she's attacking the packaging of her treat rn#the expensive top quality food that i can't really afford but buying anyway isn't good enough apparently
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Was going to write a little ficlet to go with this, but. Vaccine tiredness is killer.
A little bit of art for the FOP Nature au by @bunnieswithknives. I cannot recommend checking it out enough.
#art#my art#fop nature au#fop#fairly oddparents#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop a new wish#fopanw#fop dale#dale dimmadome#he deserves to die in a dimmaditch#body horror#blood#candy gore#Anyway the concept behind the ficlet was going to be basically about Bramble#(because im a dirty little bitch who shoves their oc where they don't belong)#setting up traps in the forest with the intention of not catching actual deer#but rather the rogue fairy disguised as a deer that the fairy council had warned her to be on the lookout for (aka Flowers)#The Council doesnt really give a shit about Bramble or her forest#they just want to make sure Flowers isn't COMPLETELY unsupervised after the Dale Incident#So anyway Bramble does catch something#and its certainly not a real deer#but he's pretty damn sure it isn't another fairy either#(idk why Dale would be in the forest I guess maybe he just went looking for Flowers to fix this and freaked out and got lost? idk)#Anyway none of that is actually canon to the au ofc it was just in my head#and it gave me an excuse to draw a fucked up deer man so like what else could I ask for
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I love you I will always love you. But the way you're hurting yourself is scary scary. I don't know what to do with it. You're lying to me, you're hiding important, dangerous things from me. Because you don't want to stop. You don't want me to leave you, and I never will, but you're going to leave me. You believe it's the only way for you to be useful. I can't make you change your mind. I'm going to lose you. I love you.
#GUESS WHO FINISHED THE LATEST EPISODE OF CRITICAL ROLE#imodna#critical role#cr3#cr spoilers#critical role spoilers#crit role#what the fuck marisha. completly threw matt for a loop for a sec there. out-warlocked her own dm#stellar play this shit can almost only end in disaster one way or another#the way matt echoed her voice..... DAMN that scene was sosooososo tasty#laudna believing everything delilah says#ahhhhhhhhhhh#imogen being so much at a loss. laudna asks her to trust her while showing she cannot be#but she believes herself to be#how is she gonna stop her? she can't lose her but she will. how can she stop her without losing her? if she doesn't stop her she's lost#marisha i am in your walls - feed me angst
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Deeply tired (but unsurprised) sigh
#Well shit#I was breaking down about it this morning but now I just feel… empty#Like I guess the back-to-back experience with losing another friend who believed violence against (((Zionists))) weren’t hate crimes-#last night just. Poured me out emotionally#Oh yeah I was literally talking about how I’d lost 4 friends to the leftist antisemitism rabbit hole (after I explained the most recent one#And she kept asking for “context” to make sure they were “really antisemitic” instead of “not wanting Palestinians to die”#LIK GIRL THEY’RE SUPPORTING TERRORISTS AND USING PALESTINIAN VICTIMS OF HATE CRIMES AS A GOTCHA TO TELL JEWS TO SHUT UP#HOW MUCH MORE DO I NEED TO TURN MY POCKETS OUT?!?!#She kept saying she just wanted to “understand the context” so that she could judge if the antisemitism I saw first hand was real#And she kept bringing up “gEnOcIdE” as a rebuttal to me saying that there were people using Palestine as an excuse to be antisemitic#I’m so fucking done.#I told her off for making my personal trauma about I/P and told her that I couldn’t have a romance with#someone who doesn’t trust Jews to define their own oppression#Leftist Antisemitism#Personal#Okay to reblog#Vent#Prospective Convert#Jewish Convert#Jumblr#My Post
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i think its funny that there’s people out there that get mad when you suggest that Light Yagami is ace and not gay, like i’m sorry y’all want him to fuck L so badly but even a gay boy would pretend to jerk off to bikini girl magazines.
#death note#yall see someone say a character doesnt fuck and yall shit your pants. even if it about a character who doesn’t fuck. like light yagami.#he shows absolutely no interest in sex or romance#the sole reason he keeps misa around. outside of being someone he can easily manipulate#is so he can have the social coverage of a girlfriend.#he keeps her around for this even after he lost his memory. clearly he wants the social convenience of a gf.#she doesn’t even ask for sex from him. she teases it but knows he won’t.#dont bitch to me how this is a gay thing i know it is but guess what? its also smth asexuals do bc queer experiences arent stratified#idk why would L want to fuck him either. i bet Light is like. a lab rat to him.#he IS still a faggot however. he’s a prime example of how an asexual can be a faggot#the lawlight train shouldve been stopped like 13 years ago its the shit teenagers like and shouldve been grown out by now#txt
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a new adventure - together
#mine.#ayami shinohara#npc: themis#safe harbor#ship: you taught me the courage of stars#guess who has a new new new wol!#:D#also i lost her [reshade] and am too lazy to get her back#the most vanilla shit up in here
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debuting my dnd character who sees a reference to something sexual and goes “ew :|” and then sees a reference to something romantic and goes “EWWWWW.” guy who rolls his eyes at sexual references but gets green-like-nauseous with disgust at the thought of romance :)
#eleri & her complete revulsion when someone makes their mood worms go pink#‘the worms glow hot pink’ eleri is pulling a face and taking the worms away.#‘the worms glow light pink’ eleri looks revolted and physically ill#‘light pink not hot pink!’ yes 👍 the romance is worse 👍#guy who hears you talking about the long-lost love of your life and wrinkles their nose and goes ‘yuck. keep that shit to yourself’#‘you can have a tragic doomed longing for the one you left behind i GUESS. but do that in private 🙄’#‘you LOVE HER?? you want to get MARRIED??? ough excuse me a second. i have to go vomit’#‘yes i know i’m green already because that’s what i look like in my spring aspect. trust me though this shade is nausea’#valentine notes#eleri
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My dog has been having senior moments, such as randomly forgetting what she's doing or trying to walk into a street, and I've been calling her "Mr. President" when it happens.
Like, "No, Mr. President, we can't walk into oncoming traffic. That's how we get killed!"
#it makes me sad that she's so old. and it's only in the past couple months that she's been doing this.#she's still overall very physically healthy. we go on walks almost every day and as long as she wants to.#and she eats well and takes vitamins and her teeth are kept clean and her claws trimmed and her coat clean#but she's slipping a little mentally#she's 11 which is old as hell for a dog her size. the vet said golden retriever mixes (which is what i assume she is) usually live to 10.#and she's not even started going white too much. just around her snoot and a little on her paws.#so when i take her in the vet always assumes she's like 6#but I've had this crusty old lady since shortly before i was even legally an adult#and I'm scared for when she does die because my other dog dying damn near made me commit suicide#and like I've said. I've had her a lot longer.#if she were a person she'd be going into middle school. like.#and she's had her share of weird health things. she's had a thyroid issue since she was 4. she has a weird skin condition.#she's had a couple surgeries and has scars from being attacked by random dogs (not my fault. she's well trained)#she's fallen a couple times recently but the vet says that's normal for her age#she went blind then wasn't blind and is going blind again#her hearing is starting to get shit too#I'm just so worried about her. this dog is a person to me. she's more real than my family in my mind.#and my cat is cool and all. but she's not a people. she's just a cat.#i guess the best i can hope for her is she lives the rest of her life comfortably and can die peacefully in her sleep#i think I'd completely come unglued from reality if i lost another dog to surprise everything cancer#but that's what I'm most scared of#because it came on so quickly and no one caught it despite me being that person who takes their dogs to the vet over a cough#she's sleeping right now and making goofy ass dog dream sounds. and i know i won't hear that any more sometime soon.#dog#old dog#senior dog#clio#joe biden mention
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I learned today what a smash cake is, and I just want the world to burn. The human race honestly doesn't deserve cake anymore.
#i feel like jay just lost her shit when she first heard about it#frankie tries to joke about getting one and ahe just stares at him and goes#you're lucky we're not married because I'd divorce you for this#I think it's benny who suggests a smaah cake for Alma's first birthday#and Jay's like wtf is that#and he enlightens her#and she's like WTAF WHY and also HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT#guess what: for a while he dated the salesperson from the baby supply store where he got the first gifts for Alma#so he heard about it from her
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i’ve been having Thoughts about my Hawke not being able to get over Anders. But like. Just Think about it. Getting over exes is already hard! now imagine if it is well known that on the big bad incident that took place in your town, you two were present? yeah.
#fhawke#hawke#bethany hawke#bethany#dragon age 2#I myself am anders positive and anders loving#She is very much not#i do not reflect her views on him#THAT BEING SAID#anybody else thinks that as hot as it might have been#telling the person who just lost their mom to a mage to#take it out on him#was a tad bit inappropriate???#my art#oh well but it's the moaning in the first kiss guy.#he can get away with it i guess.#just for being cute and nice looking bc if a person irl tried to pull that shit off...#maior hawke
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ok ok I talked to a colleague and now all's good. I'm motivated af for the interview this afternoon. I'm getting that fucking job. Everyone wants me to get that job anyway. I'm done being nice now I'm letting them know they better give me that job and sign the papers in the next month else I'm quitting. Good luck with finding yet another engineer to work in the middle of nowhere when you're already struggling to hire 💅
#Mel rambles#talking to that colleague is always such a confidence boost#she used to be a high level manager and she's always telling me I'm a good asset for the company#she knows what she's talking about so I guess I can afford to be confident#It's mean but I'm hoping I can change position and the person who replaces me is less competent so that I can be like 'SEE WHAT YOU LOST?'#'THAT OTHER GUY WASN'T KIDDING WHEN HE SAID I'M MORE SKILLED THAN THE GUYS HE HIRES TO ACTUALLY BE DEVELOPPERS'#'you had a project manager who doubled as developper and tripled as data analyst and just decided to throw 9 MONTHS OF HER WORK TO THE TRASH#FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN 'we changed our mind! youpsi 🤭'#...#ok yeah it's been months and I'm apparently still very much not over it#but they really acted like bitches. who fucking does that and doesn't properly apologize. they really don't give a shit about my work#ANYWAY let's get that job and go with people who might actually care about what I do l#and do a job that I'm like. actually interested in#CROSSING FINGERS NO ONE BETTER FOR THE JOBS THAN ME APPLIES#(that's what happened last time. guy with like 20years of experience showed up. I didn't stand a chance)#anyway let's do this!! I'm confident and in a good mood now so let's gooo
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Soooo. Got me septum pierced 2 weeks ago. Fairly certain my mom doesn't know.
Guess who is spending HOURS with her this Saturday 🤡
I wonder if she will
A) Call me a circus performer (tattooed lady is her go-to)
B) Shake her head and roll her eyes and mumble passive-aggressively under her breath about it
C) Ask what my partner thinks
D) Say I've ruined my face/looks
E) Other/Comment
#not a Payday post#Yado irl#Yado's crap mother#Yado's sister#it's funny because lost my looks? I don't think#I am not fucken drop dead gorg but neither am I a hideous bog monster#but when I get a new tattoo she sure does behave like there's something wrong with me#did I ever mention she fucken ADORES her boyfriend's stepdaughter who isn't even his stepdaughter?#guess what guys SHE'S A TATTOO ARTIST#YOU CANNOT MAKE THIS SHIT UP#oh and she always comments when she posts her tattoos and I'm like BRUH why you so two-faced?#and I'm the Gemini!
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Oubgh I just went OFF at my ouma on text
#this woman....she gave me her crochet books. then she turns around and tells me that i stole them apparently#and i have apologised for this again and again and again and she told me that shes disappointed in me for all this#so i absolutely lost my shit. i het my gat gewip.#im tired of fauning all the bloody time and still having people walk all over me#this woman has made NO effort to be involved in my life or bond with me and the ONE TIME she did she took it back#well she can go back to having my cousin be her ONLY grandchild-- her words -- and i'll go back to only engaging with family who give a shit#this woman has pushed away everyone in her life over minor slights and i guess I'm just another one#but the council of brain people have decided. we tried prostrating and begging for forgiveness. didnt work.#so now its about damn time#shes the one who keeps scratching the lions balls with a short stick. time she got the claws
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starting the movie in tears because i already know who he'll choose
#bro i invested so many ship points in them im bankrupted#jk good for her#get your man girlie#besides i already knew when THAT scene happened#my bitchass brother made me go into this blind and lied to me the entire way. genuinely fuck you#2 hours of agony im terrified of who ill become when this ends#like yay new chewtoys but damn.#wait#WAIT#LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#she may have lost but i won somewhere else#broken heart immediately healed this was the best gift i could've ever received omg#and broken AGAIN. BRO.#the way they're salting my fucking wounds like im a damn meal#i beg you pardon ⁉️#nevermind#had me tripping for a sec lol#omg#they're gonna do this for everyone i guess#LMAFUCKINGOOOO#SHAMELESS#good for her but now im mad on her behalf#they had 2 entire seasons and it took a movie to confirm everything#his dad is so fine tho#OH SHIT#so not only is their dad fine as hell he's also the father who STEPPED TF UP#there we go#im gonna stop speaking now tears are building up rn
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so. um. 👉👈
hi guysies.
Ig I should just say like. Hi
I haven't been posting here as much cause. Idk. Might be depression? I keep thinking its cause I've been so busy, which also wouldn't be not untrue, but these past, like, 3 weeks I think so far? I've had some free time but I haven't cause. I dunno, then again, I haven't been doing too much in general? I gues, besides very mandatory things, hell I've even been lacking in my regular skyrim hours of playing.
That, and as said, I get super melancholic when I remember just how sad and bittersweet it is that t0h is. Actually legit over. The show and experience, that is.
Oh all that and also becuz my headphones broke! Fuck! That's like number 2 in my bare necessities for when I post, do almost anything really! It's seriously been painful this past month going without headphones holy shit. Dude I've been scratching at the bit for some relief for headphones, I NEED music legitimately. Even right now, as I'm typing this on my phone, my music is on low levels.
But yerp. Its been. Rough. Really rough. I really do appreciate yall, everyone of yall. Have a sweet week everyone, ✌️!
#the butts chronicles#ogh but yea. been rough.#as said I have no idea if we'll keep this house cause man shits been fucked#uhhhh. lets see. recently my sister got into a fairly nasty argument with her husband since they were both drunk and hes a bit of a. hm#quick to being mad guy? I spose? but yea they made up and he actually apologized to me and my family for that so. its okay?#OH YEA FUCK LOL a few weeks ago fuckin tecksas got hit nasty with a hurricane and GUYS. I FREAKED OUT SO BAD LOL#cuz there was hail with the rain but since. I dont think we even ever experienced hail here I was scared that my ceiling roof broke again#and that it was the rain leaking to my room ceiling and was about to burst my ceiling so I legit started hyperventilating and panicking#with like. short and heavy breathing and almost crying badly until I went to look outside and saw hail and only slightly calmed down#oh but yea it was nasty lol. then the next day almost the entire block lost power and apparently sparks were happening cause fallen trees#uhhh. lets see. hmmm. OH OH RIGHT DAMN I FORGOT WE GOT A PUPPY LOL#we've gotten a lil pup all the way back from dec? iirc and she is now older and a shit lol shes in her teething phase and whatnot#still p cute tho and very puppyish. oh yea also during dec our power went out and ogh man dec was so freezing literally.#almost as bad as the one from. uhhh I cant remember the exact year but I remember it being within these past 4 years at least cause I read#a t0h fic during it lol. oh yea speaking of. we also changed our light company and damn. its been not bad so far! we had to pay up to 300#in our old company and now we dont even get to 200 so far! hope Im not jinxing it! hmm oh did I already say before that I had to get a new#phone? cause I did and I did not enjoy it lol. had it for a while and now and its arguably worse cause no damn headphone plug-in#I think I did mention this but in case. I did finish counseling. well more accurately they required payments again since things and whatnot.#I think? I mentioned the stuff I got for my bday and chmisas. I got mostly neat stuff. I guess. one of them has still yet to arrive lol#uhhhh. hrm. I did get Mr. Martinet's autograph as a present! hrmmm#my other sister got another surgery a while back and its been relatively the same since. hmm. my only other living grandparent passed away#me and my ex got into a. not great argument cause mistakes and whatnot. raccoons in the attic thats hopefully taken care of for now#aaaaand the plushes I ordered a damn near year ago have been technically canceled cause of unfortunate circumstances for the creator#who just kinda. posts things now lol ig.#but yea. lots. holy shit guys. lots has happened. fuck man. I think Ive been way more tired than I thought.#not to mention the past weeks of just. reflecting. man#uhhh#long post#LOL i gues#but yerp.
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since we're talking about call outs lately, i've been called out many times, most of which are made from lies and sometimes by altering screenshots, but the most effective call out i ever got was like, in early 2015 there was a tumblr user everyone knew was a terf, but she would say "actually i support trans women" this was before crypto terfs were as talked about so the language wasn't really there to say "hey this person is a crypto terf." but yeah some people put posts of this woman on my dash and i made a random post on my blog "why do yall reblog her shes a terf" and of course she searches her own name daily, found my post, and replied to it that me calling her a terf was racist. that was it. no other interaction. but she went on all night talking about me being racist and just making things up as she went "oh i bet she says the n word all the time irl" kind of shit that had, like no basis? But her follower base took it 100% and i literally had thousands of anons telling me to kill myself, trying to goad me into being racist (didnt work), and the most concerning thing was i got hundreds of anons being like "what was the point of doing hrt if you still look like that, you should kill yourself." It was like, violent and overwhelming. and on top of it I'd get random young teenager trans people who followed her and bought into her bioessentialism showing up in my messages being like "you give trans people a bad name" "you're why transphobia exists" etc etc it was fucking crazy.
but i lost like, no followers because everyone around me understood, this woman was a terf. this all set up the real one though.
later in the year a teenage "communist" trans girl made some snarky comment about me being racist on a post of mine blowing up. i ignored her cuz like, who cares it's just some random teenager. but i guess people were looking for a reason to hate me cuz that blew up, lots of people just took that at face value no need to investigate. when someone finally did send the girl an ask being like "hey how is she racist" she replied "I dont remember but I know she is" and even more people just took this as 100%. the thing is, i do remember her being one of those "you make trans people look bad" terf following young trans people, it's not that she didn't remember, it's that she didnt want to admit she followed a terf and she believed a terf just saying shit. I lost like 3/4s of my followers, i had a lot of people i thought were my friends just stop talking to me, and going forward every time i got a call out there would usually be a line of like "also she's racist, everyone already knows this" all cuz this girl needed to make a snarky comment cuz she just loves terfs.
the thing about the "i dont remember" bit is it made some weird game of telephone. "I dont remember" became "oh she's racist, i think she says the n word" which became "she called black bloggers the n word" like people just made shit up about me and connected it to this call out. and when id be like this isnt true id be met with a "this is just known, youre a known racist" and it's like, to this day i will still find people be like "hey good on you for growing as a person and not doing that any more" and its like I NEVER DID IT TO BEGIN WITH
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