#GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN TOGETHER

[angry-kid-with-no-money]

"Nora doesn't know anything about the things she writes about" "aftg is terrible queer rep" "the queer characters in aftg are so problematic"

Idk guys maybe the book series abt problematic ppl set in 2006 and written in the mid 2010s shouldn't be expected to hold up against scrutiny of what we consider to be moral and correct now, in 2024

Idk tho, idk

[inkskinned]

you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.

you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.

he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.

a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.

he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.

you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.

people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.

wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.

also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.

he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."

you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.

"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."

he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.

you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.

is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?

you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.

[supercalime]

Just thought about sharing this frame right here

Do with it what you will

[medilies]

GIF by mikewheeler

My brain every time I see this ^ shot:

"Get the goddamn pinky down!"

[sciderman]

Sometimes i remember a comics moment i randomly came across somewhere, where Sam Wilson mentiones a musical and Steve Rodgers says he doesn't like musicals, to whitch Sam goes "Guess that means you really are straight" and even tho i don't care about Cap America or the Avengers, the moment stuck in me for that quote by Sam. And like....Sci, any ideas if straight men actually don't like musicals or is that bullshit?

actually i think i know more gay men who hate musicals than i know straight men who hate musicals. i've had a drag queen stop me point blank when i was about to sing a barbra streisand song, and i know so many gays who pointedly hate abba. so based on my experience i think the inverse is true. most of the straight men i know are kind of impartial about musicals, but gay men? hate.

my theory is that a lot of gay men don't want to fall into stereotypes, maybe. but thaaaaat's just a theory! a gay theory.

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

I was thinking about how Anders is so utterly unshippable and how any ship with him in it would instantly become crack (and not the sort that grows on you until you find yourself doing content for it), and then I remember how we used to say the same thing about Erik after season two, and now I’ve been led to the thought of Erik/Anders and somehow ended up with a ship that makes sense-

[blacktrekkie]

bruce wayne was not raised by a gay man for y'all to write him as homophobic or confused about his kids' queerness

[figonas]

I think you perpetually online people need to understand that “queerbaiting” does not mean a character is heavily implied to be a queer person, with a live in partner, but we the audience are not explicitly shown a coming out scene. Queerbaiting is when a character is heavily implied to be a queer person and then it’s explicit confirmed they’re Absolutely Not Queer(tm) and are in a Straight Relationship(tm) and that live in partner they have romantic chemistry with is just their Friendly Roommate(tm). Not everything needs to be shown to you explicitly for you to understand the implications. Having to use critical thinking skills to draw connections between clearly defined and obviously presented dots isn’t queer baiting. For the love of god use your brain cells before they all die and leave your head about as full as an empty peanut shell.

[angelsdean]

im just saying things this morning but i really do love an insane queerbait over canon-right-out-the-gate “representation” characters with labels slapped on them and playing into the most outrageous stereotypes on purpose with the blandest storylines and boring perfect non-problematique lukewarm love interests. like WHERE is the tension WHERE is the 12 yr slow burn WHERE is the complex layering of Issues and Disorders resulting in the most nuanced bisexual man on television precisely because they never intended him to be queer in the first place but accidentally turned the dial up on their sexist funnyguy ladies man too far that it looped over into overcompensation and their 2005 lol gay jokes kept going on beyond funny and the actorman playing him made Choices like looking flustered, uncomfortable at being called out for being too butch and looking aroused and interested in every man place in front of him but especially thee gay angel to the point where said actor somehow made his EYES DILATE and then they told us WE were insane for seeing all of that and oh they started writing it as a romance anyway but were thwarted by the network and others over and over and well anyways, it’s just so delicious and fun but maybe that’s just bc i love theories and puzzles and figuring stuff out and putting things together and connecting dots and also my headcanons and opinions are more important than anything canon could say so idc if i get queerbaited for 50 yrs i’m on another level of existence, living gloriously in the subtext and knowing the Truth. anyways there will never be another ship like destiel 

[usercelestial]

literally nothing will stop me from calling good omens gay "but they're not human!" i do not care "but the lore!" i do not care "but neil gaiman said!" i do not care. those bitches are gay what are you gonna do? call a cop? vague post? cope

[lord-save-me]

Something about people speculating and doing mental gymnastics of celebrities who have always identified and presented as straight while ignoring queer people in the same media feels queer baity

[citrine-elephant]

there is nothing strictly heterosexual about the way leon looks at other men, i swear

[vintage-bentley]

Anyway there’s literally no reason to draw Aziraphale and Crowley as a M/F couple unless you feel that them being an M/M couple isn’t Good Enough, or is missing something somehow. What does drawing them as an M/F couple bring to the table that drawing them as the M/M couple they are, doesn’t provide already? Familiarity and comfort for straight people, perhaps?

[skiesareblue]

so much art about being rejected romantically and not enough about how devastating it is to find out someone was only interested in you romantically and therefore your rejection of their romantic intentions is also their rejection of your platonic intentions

[swiftfootedachilles]

We need to talk about the absolute gift that is Cam's growth spurt. No one expected him to end up looking like that. Ian went from an adorable ginger twink to a big, tall, handsome muscle stud. Let's also not forget that Mickey watched this transformation in real-time. His poor heart, waking up one morning and noticing how tall Ian is and how all that working out has paid off.

i spent fucking forever writing a response to this and my phone fucking broke and it didnt save and im too pissed to retype it all but. yes. s11 ian literally spins around in my microwave head at all hours of the day

their size difference makes me go brrrrrr

(^this image singlehandedly broke my phone and im very mad about it)

[vampyrebi]

remember when the internet made it acceptable for people who weren't even bisexual to make sweeping statements about how bi women hate a whole part of their attraction and it was just sooo funny to everyone for bi women to hate their own sexuality bc men were involved. remember that