#Fitness Christmas Gifts For Him - 2019

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Christmas 2023 Part 2: Marked for Later

And here's part two of the Christmas Fic list for this year! Please make sure you check out the lists below for previous Christmas lists! Don't hesitate to add your own recent Christmas and NYE fics below! All will be added on subsequent reblogs! :D

Merry Christmas!

[PART ONE]

See also:

Christmas Fics (Dec. 2017)

Christmas: Oblivious That One or The Other is In a Relationship

Christmas 2019 Part 1 (All Bookmarks XMas and New Years)

Christmas 2019 Part 2 (Marked for Later)

G / T / K+ Rated Christmas Fics (Dec. 2018) (Updated Dec 2021)

Community Recs: Christmas 2020 (Updated Dec 2021)

Christmas Trees / Decorating

Christmas-Time Love Confessions

New Year’s Fics (Jan 2023)

Christmas & New Year's Eve 2023 Pt. 1: Bookmarks & WiPs

Not a Word by notjustmom (NR, 114 w., 1 Ch. || Dancing, Christmas) – Just them dancing in Baker Street.

Big question! The Gift by AnAnYaH (G, 508 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas, Love Confessions, Dialogue Only, Fluff) – Christmas is not far and John has plans for a perfect gift for his little daughter.

Costumes for Christmas by AnAnYaH (G, 518 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas Fluff, First Time, Costume Kink, Christmas Party) – It's a costume party , and Sherlock is late.

Deck the Halls However You See Fit by Yuliares (G, 752 w., 1 Ch. || Canon Divergence, Developing Relationship, Asexual Sherlock, Holiday Fluff, Mary Ships It) – Relaxed domestic holiday fluff. In a nebulous future where John and Mary move in downstairs after Mrs. Hudson retires, the gang preps for their annual Christmas party in 221B Baker Street.

Something red, something green, something sparkly by Silvergirl (M, 1,106 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Christmas, Texting, Impending Desperation, Gift Shopping) – If you can't solve a puzzle yourself, ask the experts. Of course, the experts may be utterly useless ... until they aren't.

The Man in Aisle Ten by standbygo (G, 1,395 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Christmas, Shopping, Gifts, Original Female Character POV) – It's Christmas Eve, the busiest day for shopping at Harrod's, and there's a guy in aisle ten who's snapping at every sales associate who dares to approach him. It's up to Moira to help him find the perfect present. [TRANSLATIONS: Русский || 中国] 

221B's Christmas Tree by SatanDrankMyCoffee (G, 1,634 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas, Fluff, Bratty Sherlock, Domestics, Decorations) – One of the staples of most people's holiday season is decorating the tree; John and Sherlock are no exception.

Mistletoe is a Parasite by Breath4Soul (M, 1,896 w, 1 Ch. || Christmas Party, First Kiss, Mistletoe, Drinking, Dom/Sub Undertones) – It’s Christmas and after some interesting revelations at Molly Hooper's holiday party, Sherlock takes his cue from Mistletoe to take matters into his own hands. Mistletoe attaches, penetrates and absorbs... turns out that is right up Sherlock's alley...

A Little Christmas Spirit by Berty (E, 2,077 w., 1 Ch. || POV Sherlock, First Time, Blow Jobs, Christmas Fluff, Canon Divergence) – Sherlock should really learn NOT to tune John out when he's talking. He might just be missing something important.

Snap, Crackle, Pop by Call_Me_Clarence (G, 2,243 w., 1 Ch. || Pre-Slash, New Year’s Party, Panic Attacks, PTSD / Flashbacks, Dissociation, Cuddling, Caring Sherlock, Christmas Crackers) – John has a flashback during a New Years party. Sherlock tries his best to help.

Home For Christmas? by Bluebellstar (T, 2,572 w., 1 Ch. || Pre-Canon, Pre-ASiP, Captain John, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Sad Sherlock, Big Brother Mycroft, Soft Mycroft, Established Relationship) – Sherlock Holmes wants one thing for Christmas. The one thing he knows he cannot have. He wants John Watson back from Afghanistan. But with John's leave unexpectedly cancelled, Sherlock has to spend another Christmas alone. Part 3 of the Christmas at 221B series

The Christmas Dragon by eragon19 (M, 2,615 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas, Love Confessions, Fluff, Presents) – Sherlock needs to find the perfect gift for John. Luckily a toy in a shop window gives him an idea. Part 9 of the Prompt Fills series

The Joye of Snacks by khorazir (T, 3,373 w. 1 Ch. || Christmas, Baking, Domesticity, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Banter) – Christmas is approaching, and Sherlock surprises John with newly acquired culinary skills. John, in turn, simply ... surprises Sherlock.

The Romance Was There by apliddell (G, 4,011 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post S3, Post Mary, Christmas, Domestics, Villain Mary, Platonic Bedsharing, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Angst, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Love Letters) – In which Sherlock reveals his merits as a housekeeper, and a few other things, too.

Shrivelfigs by lifespossible (T, 4,547 w., 1 Ch. || Teen Harry Potter AU || Christmas, Friends to Lovers, Pining, Fluff) – John and Sherlock were not a couple, ta very much. They were friends--close friends, best friends. But that was it. Just friends. If you asked John, he’d assure you that was the case. But if you got him on the right side of a couple firewhiskies, well, he might be inclined to tell you he thought it was a damn shame they were only best friends.

Crossing Paths by prettysailorsoldier (T, 5,346 w., 1 Ch. || Uni/Teenlock Coffee Shop AU || Crosswords, Christmas, Fluff) – It seemed like a great idea, a 24-hour coffee shop near a thriving university campus, but, when everyone goes home for the holidays, John finds himself trapped in a ghost town, wiling away the hours of the overnight shift any way he can. Of course, that gets a whole lot easier when a handsome insomniac starts making regular visits, and, somewhere between the case files, crossword puzzles, and copious amounts of coffee, John discovers he doesn't mind the late shift so much after all.

The Unexpected Exchange by testosterone_tea (E, 5,703 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas, Secret Santa, Vibrators, Masturbation, Love Confessions, Intercrural Sex, Bisexual John, Demisexual Sherlock, Fluff) – When Sherlock is made to participate in the Yard's Secret Santa exchange, he knew it would be a disaster. But even he didn't expect how much of a disaster it would be.

A Smart-Arse Consulting Detective Is For Life, Not Just For Christmas by Berty (T, 5,788 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas, Friends To Lovers, Trapped, Fluff, Grumpy John, Pining Sherlock, Sharing Body Heat, First Kiss, Frottage, Cold Weather) – So here they sit. Glaring at each other. Locked in an unheated, block-built tack room on a remote farm in Suffolk. With no mobile coverage. On Christmas Eve. Sherlock's definitely NOT on the 'nice' list this year.

If I Knew You Were Coming (I'd Have Baked a Cake) by standbygo (T, 5,850 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF, Christmas, Fluff, Baking, GBBO References, Friends to Lovers, Sharing a Bed, Cooking) – John and Sherlock aren't quite sure how they agreed to hold a Great British Bake Off competition... There will be decorative bread, misuse of the French language, terrible mispronunciation of German words, fluff, bed sharing, and profiteroles.

Such a Clatter by ArwaMachine (E, 6,183 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas, Anal Sex/Fingering, PWP, Toplock, Fluff, Hand Jobs) – Christmas is boring, and the guest bed in Mummy and Father Holmes’ cottage is far too loud for Sherlock and John to have any proper fun. Whatever is to be done?

Coup de Foudre by prettysailorsoldier (T, 6,446 w., 1 Ch. || Teenager/University AU || Alternate First Meeting, Skiing, Winter, Sherlock Speaks French, Christmas Fluff) – When John and his friends decide to blow off some steam after finals with a holiday to the Swiss Alps, he's expecting a week of roaring fires, hot chocolate, and snow as far as the eye can see. He is not expecting to fall head over heels for a fellow guest--a young Frenchman known only as "Blue Scarf"--but John's not one to let a little language barrier get in the way, and, with the help of Google Translate, it might just be a Christmas to remember after all. Part 7 of 25 Days of Johnlock

All I Want for Christmas (is Proof) by Raina_at (E, 6,471 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas Fluff, Porn Without Plot, Christmas Party, Gay Club, Costume Party, Mistletoe, First Time, Hand Jobs, Semi-Public Sex, Crack and Humour, Blow Jobs, Undercover for a Case) – John has been ridiculously in love with Sherlock for a while now, but he doesn't want to rock the boat if his interest isn't returned. Their newest case might be the catalyst they need to finally figure out whether they're on the same page. Or: Sherlock and John go undercover at a Christmas party in a gay club. In costume. Things... escalate.

That Time of Year by JRow (T, 6,717 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Christmas, Fluff, Misunderstandings, Presents, First Kiss, Confessions, Rosie) – It's Christmas Eve. The tree is decorated, the mince pies are out, and Rosie is fast asleep. Flipping his mobile in his hand, John wonders what Sherlock is doing. Then he wonders, not for the first time, what it means that Sherlock is never far from his mind. Before he can stop himself, John hits the call button.

The World In Solemn Stillness Lay by J_Baillier (T, 6,855 w., 2 Ch. || Post-S4, Christmas, Angst, Medical Conditions, Big Brother Mycroft, Friends to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Miscommunication, Family Issues) – Rosie's first Christmas without her mother is approaching fast, and John isn't coping well with the pressures of being a single parent. Can Sherlock scrape his new family back together?

Cross My Heart (And Hope To Die) by prettysailorsoldier (M, 7,306 w., 1 Ch. || University AU || Puppies, Miscommunication, Blow Jobs, Shower Sex, Christmas, Happy Ending) – When John starts acting suspicious in the run up to Christmas, lying about being at work and taking secret phone calls in the bathroom, Sherlock comes to seemingly the only conclusion, that John must be cheating on him. Unwilling to confront him, and apparently unable to make him stay, Sherlock does the only thing he can: leave before he is left. That is, until an unlikely phone call on Christmas Eve turns everything on its head... Part 11 of the 25 Days of Johnlock series

The Deepest Secret Nobody Knows by Raina_at (E, 7,568 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF, Christmas Party, Stuck in an Elevator, Light Angst, Semi-Public Sex) – Sherlock is back from the dead. Now all he has to do is get back his Blogger.

of midnight moments and mistletoe by hudders-and-hiddles (M, 7,669 w., 4 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Christmas, First Kiss, Fluff, Mistletoe, Snow) – John and Sherlock are throwing a Christmas Eve party, and the flat is all strung up with mistletoe.

Darkness reigns at the foot of a lighthouse by saintscully (E, 7,682 w., 1 Ch. || HLV Missing Scene, POV Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Light Dom/Sub, Angry Sex, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse, Infidelity, Angst and Feels, Implied Suicidal Ideation, Unhappy Ending) – Why John went back to Mary that Christmas.

The Way Home by Calais_Reno (M, 7,702 w., 1 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting AU || Christmas, Post-PTSD, Injury Recovery, Meeting the Parents, Coming Home, Past Drug Addiction, Developing Relationship, Moving in Together, Falling in Love, POV Sherlock Third Person) – It's Christmas Eve, and Sherlock's landlord has evicted him due to a little misunderstanding about a very small explosion that really only burned the curtains. Mrs Hudson isn't willing to let him move into 221B until after the holiday. He's left with only one alternative: go home. Spend Christmas with his family. On the train, he meets someone who might just be having an even worse holiday. Part 32 of Just Johnlock

Only Friends by HollyShadow88 (E, 7,514 w., 2 Ch. || University AU || Accidental Voyeurism, Christmas / New Year's, Light Angst, Embarrassed John / Sherlock, Roommates, Alternate First Meeting, Anal Fingering/Sex, Affection, Topping from the Bottom, Enthusiastic Consent, Sex Tapes, Student John / Sherlock, Blow Jobs) – John Watson is assigned Sherlock Holmes as his new roommate when he is transferred to his university. Only problem is, Sherlock's hot, and John has to work around his growing feelings for him while also secretly paying for school with an OnlyFans page. With the end of the term approaching, an accidental discovery changes their relationship.

Dear Sherlock by by Tara Laurel (T, 7,729 w., 3 Ch. || Post-TRF, Reunion, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Christmas) – "John was happy. Too happy. Of course Sherlock preferred to see his friend in good spirits, especially after the cloud of depression that had hung over him the past weeks, but this was simply maddening." John's got a serious case of Christmas spirit, but is there something serious hidden behind it - something that surprises & saddens a self-proclaimed sociopath? 

Winning a Lost Bet by meet_me_in_samarra (M, 8,214 w., 2 Ch. || Christmas, Pole Dancing, Established Relationship, Costumes, Glitter, Muscular John, Sexy Sherlock, The Yard) – A lost bet makes Sherlock and John perform a pole-dance in costumes at the Yard´s Christmas party. It was supposed to be humiliating but instead the couple nailed it.

Pardon my French by archea2 (E, 8,232 w., 3 Ch. || Christmas, Fluff, Language Kink, Voice Kink, John in Afghanistan, Fever, Drunk Sherlock, Paternal Lestrade, Clothed Sex, Drunken Confessions, Humour) – Sherlock's closet Jekyll resurfaces when he's drunk, making him tender, earnest and extremely talkative with John. It's all fine with John - or would be, if Sherlock's Subconscious bloody let him speak English on these occasions.

Spell It Out by prettysailorsoldier (M, 8,344 w., 1 Ch. || Harry Potter Fusion || Teenlock, Christmas, Love Potion/Spell, Pining Sherlock) – Remaining at Hogwarts over break has become something of a tradition for Sherlock and John, staying behind together ever since their very first year, but, when Irene throws a gift of doctored coconut ice into the mix, plans quickly change, even if John doesn't. Part 6 of 25 Days of Johnlock

Tomorrow by Berty (M, 9,517, 1 Ch. ||PODFIC AVAILABLE || Magical Realism AU || Canon Divergence, Christmas, Hurt/Comfort, Spells and Enchantments, Married John/Mary, Difficult Decisions, Fluff and Angst, Spells and Enchantments) – The night before they travel to Dorset to spend Christmas with Sherlock's parents and John's wife, 221 Baker Street is peaceful with the smell of baking, flickering candles and presents under the tree. But Father Christmas can't be relied upon to bring the boys their heart's desires. Just as well Mrs Hudson - who is NOT a fairy godmother OR their housekeeper, thank you very much - is so good at her job.

Hot Chocolate by ohlooktheresabee (G, 10,756 w., 2 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post S4, POV John, Idiots in Love, Christmas Fluff, Developing Relationship, Sherlock’s Heart, Affection, Falling in Love, Past Child Abuse, Light Angst with Happy Ending) – With Sherrinford but a distant memory, Christmas season approaches and John Watson is not in the mood. His friend and flatmate Sherlock disappears for a week, leaving him behind again, and John doesn’t think that things can get any worse. However, with a little help from their friends, he might finally start seeing the reasons to enjoy this Christmas after all... 

no man is a failure by blueink3 (T, 10,836 w., 1 Ch. || It’s a Wonderful Life AU || Christmas, Whump, Suicidal Ideology, Angst with Happy Ending, Familly, Hurt/Comfort) – “John, you’re talking to a dead girl on Christmas Eve in the middle of the Golden Jubilee Bridge. When I say, ‘perk of the job,’ the definition is vast.” She opens her hands in front of her and gives a tiny bow. “Congratulations, it’s December the 24th, 2016 and you, John Hamish Watson, have never been born.”

The Time Being by prettysailorsoldier (M, 11,008 w., 1 Ch. || University AU || John in Afghanistan, Victor Trevor, Time Skips, Poetry, Goodbyes, Christmas, Fluff, Drug Use, Angst with Happy Ending) – When Sherlock sends John off from King's Cross the day before Christmas Eve, he can't bear the thought that it's really goodbye, no matter how much John insists a clean break is best, so he suggests a compromise: Meeting up in that same place 7 years later. What follows are snapshots of the next seven Christmases, chronicling the changes in each man's life, but just because they're growing separately, doesn't mean they're growing apart. Part 3 of 25 Days of Johnlock

A Tale of Two Soldiers by batslikepastel (T, 14,136 w., 5 Ch. || S4 Fix It, Jealous Sherlock, Misunderstandings, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Christmas, Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Developing Relationship, Cuddling / Snuggling, First Kiss, Stress Baking, Domestic Fluff) – It's Christmas, and Sherlock and John are finally flatmates again after the tumultuous events of the previous year. But a sudden revelation about John's sexuality and James Sholto's unexpected presence throw a wrench into Sherlock's plans, and his jealousy threatens to overwhelm him even as John remains blithely oblivious. Their relationship has reached a turning point, and the ball is in John's court now.

Silent Night by khorazir (M, 15,060 w., 1 Ch. || Codebreaker / WWII / Imitation Game-Inspired AU || Care Fic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Dev. Rel., Reunion, PTSD John, Christmas) – It’s Christmas Eve 1944, and Sherlock Holmes has received his most precious gift already: after a long, dangerous deployment, Surgeon Captain John Watson of the Royal Navy has unexpectedly returned from the front. As if this weren’t enough, there’s a case. Both events make for a night full of promise, excitement, and the difficult task of getting reacquainted with the man Sherlock hasn’t seen in three years and feared he’d lost forever. Part 2 of Enigma

A Story That Is Almost, But Not Quite, Entirely Unlike Blue Carbuncle by Iwantthatcoat (M, 16,468 w., 10 Ch. || Blue Carbuncle Adaptation, Holmes Parents, Christmas) – It’s the most wonderful time of the year, and the Holmes Family is all set to have one of those unimaginable Christmas dinners— but the game is afoot, as Mummy’s friend is caught up in a Christmas mystery.

The Secret of Hazel Grange by SilentAuror (E, 18,153 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Christmas, COVID-19 / Pandemic, POV Sherlock) – John has a secret, and Sherlock is bothered. Trapped together at Baker Street during the lockdown, the tension only grows worse as Christmas draws nearer...

Serendipity by Calais_Reno (T, 18,222 w., 3 Ch. || Serendipity Fusion || Christmas, Romance, Coincidences, First Meetings, Misunderstandings, New York City, Fate and Destiny) – A bit of New York Christmas fluff, based on the 2001 movie.

Breaking Christmas by MissDavis (M, 18,606 w., 18 Ch. || Christmas, Established Relationship, Fluff, Nipple Piercing, Ficlets, No Angst) – Join me in some established relationship Johnlock as I attempt to make Sherlock and John participate in some Seasonal Fucking Cheer.

Welcome Christmas by MissDavis (T, 18,774 w., 24 Ch || Post S4, Christmas, Winter, Parenthood, Canon Compliant, Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Bed Sharing, First Kiss) – Join John and Sherlock at Baker Street as they celebrate Rosie's first Christmas and beyond. From Rosie crawling around the flat as they tiptoe around each other en route to their first kiss, to a happy retirement with a young grandson who wants to be just like Grandad and Papa, this fic shows how Sherlock and John celebrate Christmas together through the years. 

Mistletoe and Misdemeanours by Robottko (T, 20,738 w., 12 Ch. || Coffee Shop AU || Christmas, Fake Relationship, Coffee Shops, Victor Trevor, First Kiss, Holmes Family, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Family Drama, Kidnapping) – When Victor Trevor backs out of the Holmes family Christmas at the last minute, Sherlock panics because he has no way to impress his parents. Thankfully there is a handsome army doctor with nowhere to go in his coffee shop, though it would be more helpful if he were a bit more willing.

High Mountain Tea Leaves by disfictional (E, 23,207 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TFP, TD-12, Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Angst, Travel, Case Fic, Miscommunication, Shower Sex, Masturbation, Chinese Language, New Year’s Kiss, Toplock) – A mountaintop robbery on a Japanese-occupation-era train where the only item stolen was a small case of mysterious tea leaves in a backpack? An ideal Christmas gift, two days late. Sherlock convinces John to travel for tea.

Danger Nights by khorazir (T, 23,591 w., 3 Ch. || Post-TLD, Friends to Lovers, Mentioned Parentlock, Pining, First Kiss/Time, Winter, Folklore, Wales, Spooky Elements, Bed Sharing, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Spooky Elements) – According to folklore, the nights between Christmas and Twelfth Night are the most dangerous of the year. During them, the Wild Hunt rides, and ghosts and demons come out to haunt unsuspecting and misbehaving folk. An investigation of a series of strange occurrences leads John and Sherlock to Hay-on-Wye on the Welsh Marches, to face ghosts weird and ancient as well as close and personal – and perhaps to start the new year on a more hopeful note than the previous one.

All Roads Lead Home at Christmas by reveling_in_mayhem (T, 25,709 w., 24 Ch. || Post TRF, Christmas, Happy Ending) – Perhaps Christmas could truly be a time for miracles, for some. But John didn't believe in miracles. Not anymore.

Sherlock Holmes & The Mysterious Ex by Gatergirl79 (M, 27,942 w., 16 Ch. || Family, Romance, Holmes Family) – Sherlock and John are forced to spend Christmas with Sherlock’s family. An unsettling idea especially when John will have to play ‘Boyfriend’ thanks to Mycroft. But why exactly does Sherlock want to avoid a family party?

If There Were Any Time For A Miracle by Berty (E, 31,732 w., 3 Ch. || Jealous Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Christmas, Birthday Party, Misunderstandings, First Kiss/Time, Fluff, Sherlock’s Violin) – John and Sherlock are spending Christmas at the Holmes' family home. Sherlock has a plan that John doesn't know about. John has a wish that Sherlock doesn't know about. If there were any time for a miracle, this would be it.

Miracle on Islington High Street by Jaybeefoxy (M, 33,006 w., 7 Ch. || Christmas, Holmes Family, Mystrade, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Magical Realism, Friends to Lovers, Papa Lestrade, Rosie Watson, Caring Greg) – It's Christmas, and Greg does a favour for someone, only to receive a strange favour in return.

Consulting for Christmas by ohlooktheresabee (G, 40,153 w., 6 Ch. || Far Future Post S4 / Older Rosie, Thriller, Case Fic, Pre-Relationship, Christmas, Paris, POV Alternating, Fluff, Light Angst, Mutual Pining, BAMF John, BAMF Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Jealousy, Misunderstandings, Mistletoe, Ice Skating, Heist, Awkward Romance, Developing Relationship, For a Case, Background Mystrade, Angst with Happy Ending) – The Louvre Museum in Paris is planning to host the celebrated Winter Fabergé Egg for its winter exhibition - quite the feat as it has not been on public display since 2002. However there is a snag: whispers of a world-renowned master-thief with his eyes set on the valuable prize. The curator has asked the famous Sherlock Holmes to consult on security, but the detective needs a lot of convincing: he is after all a bit busy with trying to woo a certain clueless ex-army doctor… At the same time, John is attempting to balance work, missing Rosie who is off on her gap year, a volunteer gig at a local London orphanage, and seething jealousy upon the arrival of an apparent old friend of Sherlock’s. Attempting to foil the heist of the century while remaining friendly and objective might just be a step too far... A Christmas crime caper packed full of misdirection, miscommunication and mistletoe, set against the romantic backdrop of London and Paris in the winter. Thrown into all this, will our two idiots finally manage to see what has been right in front of them all along?

12 Lays of Christmas Series by distantstarlight (E, 45,164 w. across 12 works || Post-S4, Stand-Alone Ficlets, Christmas, Friends to Lovers, Gratuitous Sex) – This series is made up of stand-alone ficlets of varying sizes, all resulting in Johnlock via a number of different routes, and all from my exhaustion fevered brain. Some will have sex and some will not. You don't need to read them in any particular order but I hope you enjoy them when you do. Happy Giftmas Everyone!

Erosion by saintscully (E, 53,386 w., 12 Ch. || Post TFP, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Case Fic, Christmas, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-Con, Minor Character Death, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Psychological Trauma, Divorce, Estrangement, Family Issues, PTSD, Medical Conditions, Mentions of Dementia) – Sherlock’s father falls ill, leaving the surviving family members broken and rudderless. James Sholto shows up in London unexpectedly, his intentions unclear. John has to navigate the consequences of crime, illness and death and their impact on his frayed relationship with Sherlock.

Fairytale of New Scotland Yard by Ewebie (M, 57,858 w., 30 Ch. || Mystrade and Johnlock, Christmas, Advent Fic, Christmas Party, Christmas Presents, Christmas Dinner, Accidental Cuddling, Accidental Bed Sharing, Sharing Body Heat, Holmes Family) – This is a Christmas love story:Greg Lestrade loved Christmas. He loved winter, the bite in the air, the flurries and occasional actual snow, the colorful lights, the sometimes loud decorations, the songs, the singing, the parties, the people, the presents, the surprises, the food and the drink, and the genuine good cheer... Mycroft Holmes hated Christmas. He hated the winter, the cold actually made his knee and hip ache - though that was not something others were ever to know - the tiny crystals of frozen death that fell from the sky to disrupt the proper function of transportation were terrible, the blinking lights and loud noises brought about his migraines, the abysmal excuse for what passed as music - not to mention the people singing it, dear Lord - the ever increasing social obligations and nonstop political kowtowing, the people, the sheer volume of people... Part 7 of Guess My Race Is Run

You Teach Me and I'll Teach You by Burning_Up_A_Sun (E, 61,165 w., 15 Ch. || Teacher AU || Coming Out, Blow Jobs, Shower Sex, Bed Sharing, Christmas, Rimming, Homophobia, Beach Sex) – Dr. John Watson, with his recent PhD in music education, takes a job at Jesup Arts Magnet Middle School, where he meets the most obnoxious, irritating, fascinating, handsome gifted History teacher. With no where to live, John accepts Sherlock Holmes' offer of sharing a house on Baker Street. But will a Southern community accept two male teachers in a relationship or will they be forced to quit? Part 1 of the Adult Education series

6 Simple Rules For Dating John Watson by prettysailorsoldier (M, 81,958 w., 22 Ch. || Teenager / University AU || Cheating, Christmas, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Roommates) – John Watson's love life may have had its ups and downs, but at least it had some structure. That is, until Sherlock Holmes showed up on his doorstep.

So Grant Us All a Change of Heart by ArwaMachine (E, 83,276 w., 5 Ch. || Christmas Carol Fusion || T6T Compliant, Pining, Angst with Happy Ending, Smut, Temporary Character Death, Drug Use / Reference, Suicide) – It’s Christmastime at Baker Street, but things are far from festive. Mary is dead, John and Sherlock’s friendship is all but ruined, and Sherlock has become a right dick about everything. More convinced than ever that sentiment is objectively useless, Sherlock needs a little paranormal intervention to see the error of his ways or else run the risk of losing all that is important to him.

A Telling Touch by MiyakoToudaiji (E, 91,656 w., 28 Ch. || Post-TRF Divergence, Reunion, Hurt/Comfort, Drama, Soldier John, Friends to Lovers, BAMF John, Doctor John, War, Syria, Violence, Blood, Injury, Fighting, Soulmates, True Love, First Kiss / Time, Slow Build, Romance, Christmas, Family, Holmes Manor, Childhood Memories, Sherlock’s Violin, Case Fic) – After Sherlock’s death, John manages to get himself re-enlisted and is sent back to war. But when two series of gruesome murders link home and outland together, John is suddenly faced with more battles than he could have imagined.  

By A Thousand Cuts by 7PercentSolution and J_Baillier (E, 95,662 w., 21 Ch. || Surgeon / Medical AU || Angst, Family Issues / Dynamics, Drama, Established Relationship, Autism Spectrum, Ableism, Depression, Romance, Hospitals, Neurosurgery, Anaesthesia, Doctor!John, Doctor!Sherlock, Christmas, Therapy, Psychological Trauma, Childhood Bullying, Career Crisis, Anger, Hurt/Comfort, Addiction, Sensory Processing Disorder, Parenting, Holidays, Whump) – It's hard to let go of the past, especially when going home for the holidays. An incident just before Christmas brings unpleasant memories to the surface, and the wounds Sherlock carries may take more than just time to heal. Part 11 of the You Go To My Head series

Wild About Harry Series by PlaidAdder (T, 397,189  w. across 9 works || Harry/Clara and Johnlock, Post-TRF, Canon Compliant, Dancing, Case Fics, Morning After, Teamwork, Drug Use, Doctor Who Crossover, Christmas, Alcoholism, Fix It Fics, Alternating POVs, Established Relationships) – This started as a post-Reichenbach fic and turned into a series in which Harry Watson is a repeating character. John and Sherlock get together in the first story ("Empty Houses") and thereafter it's either developing relationship or established relationship. Most of this is case fic and long, but there are a few shorter ones.

[foxes-that-run]

Two NYE ago means 2015 NYE right? Since Harry was with that girl, and she was pretty mad at that time, maybe she was reminiscing about their time together and hoping to find someone who'd stay and then after meeting Joe she repurposed it because she thought she found that love she was searching for with Joe. I think most of reputation is her repurposing songs/ideas that were about something/someone else. And Joe just fit but some songs definitely has part Joe in them too. So I guess she succeeded in that bait and switch thing

That video, (which Taylor Nation has cut at 24:38 from their version) is from Chicago 27 June 2018, so she is referring to NYE 2016/17. (side note: Harry was also in Chicago 30 June 2018. In his next show he changed the Lyrics to MMIH to 'running with thieves you'... a few weeks before Hamille ended due to cheating......)

We have been told a few things to tell us she was with Joe then:

In 2018 the Reputation magazines included photos from Stella McCartney's farm in Bishampton (on the pages adjacent to NYD) and in January 2016 Joe posted a photo of himself woods that also had trees... not the same trees, but OK... I guess.

In 2019 in promo for A Christmas Carol Joe told interviewers he swims in Hampstead Heath every christmas, which many linked to Paper Rings, along with a very natural photo of Taylor painting a literal wall. And maybe he does, just him, his family and (long time lcy swim enthusiast) Harry Styles and by chance no one ever photographed or spoke about it.

Then on 30 December 2020 Taylor was hacked and the only photos they got/leaked was 7 (rather odd) images of Taylor and Joe getting ready on that new years eve. Amazingly they had access to Taylor Swift's camera roll and only leaked 7 PG images that placed her with Joe the at the time of a story Taylor Nation edited out of one of their videos about an icy swim on NYE, almost on the anniversary of when they were taken. (The 7 Photos were in 2 drops, the proper (non-mirror) selfies leaked October 2021.)

So why do I doubt this? Any alternative version is pure speculation we don't know where Taylor was NYE 16/17. But the edited video is weird, and I find the above odd.

FIrstly New Year's Day seems like an 1989 outtake to me, the story also fits the NYE 2012/13 Haylor Kiss that did involve hardwood floors, a Taxi in which to squeeze hands, a lobby girls could carry shoes in and an insane crowd that did make it hard and probably made them feel lost. And she looked ready to cry performing it while she was dating Joe?

Where was Harry on New Years Eve 2016/17?

Well he was spotted with Taylor on 28 December 2016 in Liverpool. Within a few days, one of his friends signed a record for Taylor to gift Austin Swift. Austin thanked the band who replied "when someone asks you to sign a record for their "friends little brother' and the friend turns out to be Taylor Swift."

After being missing for a few days he was next seen taking photos with fans in Holmes Chapel (1.5 hours drive from Stella's farm) on New Years Eve.

But wait! Taylor said she and Joe had been together for 3 months in the Lover Journal? What she said was "we" maybe that was Joe and we didn't find out for another 5 months. Or maybe she was with someone else.... in this entry shaped like a butterfly.

Updated with more.. so I question adding this and need to cavet that haylorsecrets was an account that claimed to have inside info from Taylors PR office and lost the inside connection (in hindsight after Taylor fired her publicist before Tree in 2014) they then had a friend who fed them some info. It may have all been made up, but they were right about some things. Looking for another post I saw these where she posted in February 2017 that Harry and Taylor had been together at christmas. (x, x)

[kthyg]

ghoul. — (rhapsodies)

[SPECIAL INSTALMENT: (CHRISTMAS) RHAPSODIES]

pairing: ot7 x reader

rating: 13+

genre: tokyo ghoul au, soulmate au, fluff

disclaimer: this story is a work of fiction. descriptions of the BTS members in this story does not reflect nor portray them in real life. everything in this story only fits in imagination and does not apply outside of imagination.

warning: nothing much, just; domestic yoongi, domestic jin, lots of soft kisses, hugging, an emotional and sentimental moment with yoongi and his first love, cannibalism joke (just once from tae). japanese terms of endearment are used in this by jin and tae.

word count:

lexicon & profiles | masterpost | masterlist | navigation

note from winter 💌:

this is my first christmas fic - yeayy!! also this is just my poor excuse to be extra emotional and sentimental idk idk i want to give a nice scene for my ghoul babies bcs ik they wont hv a nice scene for some time in normal ver ha ah ha ah…

this instalment is the softest I've ever written...

its been a long time since I write a story based on a song. the last time was winter flower by younha ft rm, a story about a girl healing from depression but reached a point where she couldn't handle it anymore, suddenly wanting to end everything. it was a open ending story tho :) anddd now rhapsodies joins as the second story that is based on a song.

also, just a friendly reminder that rhapsodies is not sharing the same timeline as the released chapters of ghoul. if possible, its a future story but whatever information (such as relationship, places, etc...) in this instalment is valid for the alt story and main story :D

ok so i don’t really celebrate christmas but i think i kind of know the feeling (not 100% because i would love to celebrate holiday season with snow ;-;) because i have gone through it with my maternal relatives - i joined them during 2019’s christmas! 🫶🏻

I HOPE IT ISNT TOO LATE FOR A CHRISTMAS GIFT 🥹 (be nice w me this is the first time i've ever written a full fluff)

💌 what is winter listening to? : first love by bts (suga) & piano ver by smyang piano, first love by hikaru utada, christmas tree by v, my dearest by amalee (original by supercell).

📝 if you want to know more about this au, you can refer to lexicon & profiles. any other questions you can refer to me !!

dedication: to my first love.

              Snow has been falling for days now, piling into a thick layer of what looked like shaved ice on almost everything. It was a special evening today; your squad, the Q squad was preparing to celebrate Christmas. You and Yoongi had invited the others; Taehyung, Jungkook, Hoseok, Namjoon, Jimin – your and Yoongi's soulmates, - Rosé, Mingyu, Minghao and Sunoo.

              You sat comfortably and warmly in the company of the fireplace and your members, Jisoo, and Lisa, as the three of you decorated the Christmas tree. The pine tree that stood mightily in front of you was a real deal, all thanks to Namjoon.

              When you told him you have always celebrated with the artificial one with your loyal friend, Somi, during your days in the Jeon Quarter, he immediately told you he would buy the real one just for you. He had done the same thing for Jungkook back then because unlike you, Jungkook couldn't even celebrate the festive season during his childhood.

              You could've disagreed and told him to get the artificial one, but all your soulmates agreed with Namjoon before you could even voice your opinion and defeatedly accepted his decision. You couldn't stop him from doing things his way – The strong-headed Kim Namjoon.

              The crackling fire sound was soothing to your ears. The warmth of the fire was very inviting for you to jump to the couch and wrap yourself with a blanket and a mug of hot chocolate providing extra warmth in your palm.

              Curling into a ball, basking in the heavenly warmth on this cold day; you could always do that any other time. As you and your friends decorated the tree in meaningful silence, the doorbell rang, disrupting the silence.

              "Can someone go get the door?" Jin yelled out the request from the kitchen.

              Jisoo immediately got on her feet as she volunteered with a cheery smile, "On it!" But her smile was quick to fade once she reached the door and opened it as she mumbled in a boring tone. "Oh, it's you…"

              Greeting with an equally boring tone, "Save the disappointment for another day, 'lil sis," Taehyung rolled his eyes. "I'm here for my lovers anyways."

              "Who's at the door, Soo-ya?" You asked, making your way towards the door. Once you've seen the invited guest, you beamed, "Oh–! Hi, V."

              "Hi, hime," he opened his arms as an invitation for you to slot in and you did. He smooched the crown of your head lovingly as the lovely nickname spilt from his lips warmed your cheeks.

              "Come in," you broke the hug and ushered him to step in. "Jin's in the kitchen preparing food for tonight, and Yoongi's in his room."

              "(Y/N)!" Jin called for you. "Can you help me here?"

              "Be there in a second!" You responded and turned back to your soulmate with a welcoming smile, you told him, "Make yourself at home, Tae."

              Once you were completely out of their vision, the silence was loud, "Don't get too comfortable," Jisoo narrowed her eyes at her brother.

              "Stop being so hostile," he sighed deeply. "It's Christmas, for God's sake."

              "Hostility is subjective," she retorted.

              "It will be objective today or I'll have your half-human flesh as dinner tonight."

              "Obscene!" She gasped out loud as her hand reached out to slap Taehyung's shoulder, offended.

              "Jisoo, the Christmas tree isn't going to decorate itself!" Lisa shouted from the living room.

              "Of course it won't, Lisa!" She huffed but obliged either way as she turned towards to living room, continuing decorating the Christmas tree.

              The kitchen was filled with the heavenly and divine smell of delicious meals being cooked. Jin multitasked his way through the kitchen since the afternoon. Yoongi has been helping him but he retreated to his room after some time now.

              "Hey, kareshi," your arms snaked around his waist as you hugged him from the back, chin resting on his shoulder as you asked, "What do you need help with?"

              "Hello, kanojo," his thumb brushed across the skin of your hand that was wrapped around his waist lovingly and softly. "Who was that?"

              "It's Taehyung," you told him.

              "He's early," he mused to himself. He turned around to face you as he rested his arms on your shoulders, lazily slinging them around you. "Can you help me with the chicken?"

              "Of course," you smiled.

              Jin lowered his face, killing the distance between your face and his as he placed a quick kiss on your lips. It was a short moment of two lips having contacted but the heat still flared up to your cheeks and your stomach filled with butterflies.

              "It won't be long; you can check on Yoongi in his room after you're done."

You stifled a giggle with a frown, "I didn't even tell you I was going to check on him."

"Soulmate instinct," he winked at you and stole yet another kiss from you. This time he remained a bit longer. No tongues were involved as it was purely lips-to-lips interaction but were enough to be a very meaningful kiss.

              A frown on his temple, fingers cupping his chin as Jungkook pondered. He and Namjoon were on their way to Yoongi's squad apartment but decided to stop by the 5th ward mall because Jungkook decided to buy a present for you. He knew you had told all of them to not buy you anything, but he was never the one to listen, so here he was. 

"What should I give (Y/N) for Christmas?" Jungkook asked his companion as they walked into the mall. The mall was decorated with Christmas lights, trees, and all other related decorations. The branded stores also decorated up to the session and released brand new items to fit into the festive session.

              "A lingerie?" Namjoon suggested mindlessly.

              "What the fuck, hyung." Again, a deep frown found its place on Jungkook's forehead at his soulmate's idea.

              "It's a suggestion." He shrugged.

              "Well, what do I buy her lingerie for?" The younger cast cursory glances at the stores. Feet had their own mind as Jungkook walked to wherever his feet took him, and Namjoon followed suit.

              Having a late realisation, Jungkook's eyes widened, "Are you hinting I should fuck her tonight? At Yoongi's apartment?"

              Namjoon gave his soulmate a side glance, "Not a bad idea?" then he shrugged, "I would prefer calling it love making though, since it's Christmas."

              Jungkook let silence be the language between them as they continued to stroll around the mall until there was nothing to be explored but as if the brain had relied on the conversation they just shared, their feet stopped in front of a lingerie store.

              "Maybe it's not a bad idea after all."

              "Told you." And Namjoon walked into the store with Jungkook trailing behind.

              "Jimin put that down."

              Hoseok's deep voice burst Jimin's little bubble of fantasy as he glared at the younger. "What? Hyung, no," he flashed his soulmate the white fluffy tail butt plug and a pair of white fur cat ears. "This is cute!"

              The other only gave him a dirty look, "You're just kinky."

              Jimin had heard that almost every time, he was shameless and immune to it. 'Kinky' has probably become a compliment for him now. He would be more than proud if someone called him so.

              "You would like it if it's on (Y/N)," you would definitely look cute in this, no doubt.

              The tail-like butt plug inserted in your arsehole, leaving your pussy dripping with wetness, and the cute cat ears to match the tail. You'd look so pliant and submissive, and with that costume, it would give an extra hardness, extra adrenaline rush, blood rush down to their cocks–

              "Or unless you'd like it on you?"

              Flabbergasted, heat rushed to Hoseok's face both from embarrassment (for thinking about you in a public setting and popping a boner) and humiliation (from Jimin's sexual innuendo), "Hah – whatthefuck, shut up Jimin!"

              "That's what I thought," he has a smug grin tugging on his lips.

              "Thank you for purchasing!"

              What.

              "Jimin!" No way he actually bought it.

              Well, you'd look cute either way.

              Yoongi wasn't in his room.

              And when that happened, he could only be in one place. You stood in front of the door – the door to the space where he found solace at any time given.

              You have been in there with him occasionally. The two of you would sit in silence, content with just the presence of each other as the bright stars in the dark sky became the only source of entertainment most of the time you and him were in the room.

              On rare occasions, Yoongi would sit on the brown piano, you next to him and play you a piece that never told you the name of it even when you had asked about it. He would brush the question away with a kiss on your temple and the same word "Untitled".

              And right before you, the sound of the 'Untitled' piece was playing. Your hand reached to knock on the door, "Yoongi?"

              "Kitten," his voice was mellow as he answered you. "Come in."

              Stepping in, you took in your surroundings. It was the same as when you last saw it. There wasn't much to keep a tab on the room except for the brown piano that settled on one side of the corner, the only furniture in this spacious room of nostalgia – as Yoongi would call it.  "What are you doing here alone?"

              "I'm not alone," he told you. He was sitting on the piano stool as his fingers rested in between the keys. "I'm with my first love." He looked at the piano fondly before he brought his gaze to you with equal, or if could, greater fondness.

              "First love?" You asked as you approached him. The room was dark with no source of light except for the sun outside. The sun was slipping, creating a glorious conflagration that blazed fiery colours. They appeared silky, smooth combinations of red, yellow, and blue in the sky that illuminated the room, colouring it like the sky.

              "The piano," his hand reached out to take yours in his, guiding you towards the seat next to him. "The first thing I learn to love."

              Placing your fingers delicately on the piano keys, you pressed the keys of Yoongi's favourite piece, the one he named 'Untitled'. You didn't play it until the end although you did remember the whole piece just from listening to him playing it. Reaching the last note of the piece, your fingers retreated from the keys. "Do you want to tell me about your first love story?"

              Your voice has always been so soft, delicate, and mellow. Who was Yoongi to reject your request? Maybe it was the time you knew the meaning behind the piece you had just played that you learned by heart from him. Chuckling, his fingers started to move around the keys as he silently answered your request.

              "From the corner of my memory, in the corner of my childhood house," fingers leisurely hit the keys. "A piano was there."

              "Hmm?" Your fingers joined his on the keys, as you played to harmonise with him. "What colour was it?"

              "Brown," he breathed out. "A brown piano settled on one side."

              He continued, "I remember that moment, where I was barely any taller than the brown piano. I looked up to it, because of my height but also because I was in awe. I yearned for it the moment I had touched it my little fingers."

              "It felt nice, I told my mom." His fingers pressed on the last notes before changing to another key. "I was content. Just from looking at it. It felt so nice that I played, however, my fingers wanted and even then, I still didn't know its significance."

              "It's nice that you know your first love even as a child."

              "What's your first love, kitten?" He asked, fingers still on the keys.

              Yours too, on the white jade-like keys, as you answered him, eyes closed. "Us."

              You continued, "I didn't understand the concept of first love back then, but my parents could easily be my first love, but I know I love them from the moment I was brought to this world. I didn't learn to love them because by default, I have already loved them. They were my unconditional love."

              Your fingers paused mid-air, "First love," resumed, "It can be interpreted in many ways,"

              The first time you learn how to truly love,

              The first time you love,

              The first time you felt truly loved,

              The first time you are loved,

              The first time experiencing the true definition of love.

              "But it will always have the same impact; unforgettable and irreplaceable."

              "True," Yoongi agreed softly, the soulful melody still filling the room.

              The mellow sound that came from the graceful movements of Yoongi's fingers on the piano continued to become honey to your ears. Your fingers were now placed on your lap as you let your lover play the black and whites on his own.

              You turned to look at him, to take in his beautiful side profile. His skin was glowing. His eyes were closed as he focused on letting his digits work their wonders on the eighty-eight.

              He looked stunning.

              Sometimes, less was more, and you didn't need to elaborate more on Yoongi's majestic presence.

              Ethereal.

              "First love isn't always sunshine and rainbows," he told you once he finally opened his eyes, his fingers had stopped, leaving the last note he had pressed echoing around the room. "Back then during my elementary school days, I remember, I was finally taller than the piano."

              "But dust was piling on top of the white jade-like keys. I neglected it when I yearned for it so much. I still failed to see its significance," his fingers were like a feather as he ghosted his fingertips on the keys.

              Melancholy as he continued, "Until a day came that marked the last day of the piano."

              "Don't feel sorry for not recognising the significance or recognising it late," you told him.

              Your fingers raised in the air and were softly placed on the right keys as you pressed. Fingers had their own mind as they danced on the black and whites, continuing where he had left. "Don't worry even if I leave. You will do well on your own. Though it is an end to our relationship, greet me happily when we meet again, no matter in what form."

              Yoongi looked at you with acute nostalgia. One hand of yours left the bar of whites and blacks as you reached for his hand, "Let's give a proper greeting to your first love."

The brown piano that stood mightily in front of you was the exact brand of piano Yoongi had back then. It might not be the original form of his first love, but in whatever form a piano could be, it will still be the first love of Yoongi.

              "Let's finish this piece together."

              Even though I was gone for a long time,

              Without repulsion,

              You accepted me.

              His fingers picked up where they had left as he confessed, "You may not be my first love, but you and the others will always be my eternal love. The people I loved, love and will love for eternity."

              Even when I pushed you away,

              Even when I resented meeting you,

              You were firmly by my side.

              "I wish to love you the way of my first love, I want to love you every day."

              So don't ever let go of my hand.

              I won't let you go ever again either.

              "If there comes a day where we have to end everything the eight of us share, I wish to continue loving you, every day until my days end."

              The two of you hit the last keys, and as if feathers, fingers were lifted slowly and smoothly from the keys. The piece came to an end. It came to a meaningful end. An end that filled with so many emotions. Conflicted at first but harmonised in the end.

              "I love you, (Y/N)."

              "I love you too, with all of me."

              The sun slipped completely away from the horizon as the light on the sky was then replaced with clouds of dust of bright, shining stars;

              A kiss sealed the vow.

–

              The food was almost done by the time you entered the kitchen with Yoongi. Jin was preparing the plates and utensils along with the dishes to be put on the table with the help of his younger sister and Lisa. You and Yoongi joined them to help but Jin shook his head and said that everything was almost done and asked the two of you to accompany Taehyung into the living room.

              When your feet strode towards the living room, the doorbell suddenly rang again, making you halt in your steps along with Yoongi as you looked at him, "I think that's the remaining guests," you motioned him to sit with Taehyung as you walked towards the door. "Let me get the door."

              Once you twisted the doorknob to open, you were greeted with two figures, both having muscular build and cute faces, carrying almost the same aura had you not known these guys like the back of your hand.

              Namjoon was the first to greet you as he pulled you into a hug, "Merry Christmas, princess," he kissed your cheeks before going for your lips. You savoured the feeling of his plush lips on yours.

              He pulled back and said, "Apologies for our delay."

              Jungkook was quick to lock you into a tight hug and cradle your head in his arms. You returned his hug with equal enthusiasm before replying to Namjoon, "No, don't worry. You guys are not late at all," you broke the hug, much to Jungkook's displeasure as he whined at the loss of warm contact.

              "Plus, Jinnie just finished cooking," you added.

              The sound of a car's nearing the neighbourhood made Jungkook whip his head towards that direction. Recognising the car and the wild skill of driving (no value for both life and the car; Jimin), he said, "I think that's Jimin and Hoseok."

              The three of you watched as Jimin safely and perfectly parallel-parked his car next to Taehyung's. Hoseok got out of the car and appeared to be nagging about something as his mouth danced at a fast pace with a frown etched on his forehead.

              Probably nagging at Jimin, again, for his reckless driving.

              When Hoseok neared the entrance where you, Namjoon, and Jungkook stood, his eyes shone with bright felicity as he waved enthusiastically in your direction. His lips could practically be seen as a lovely heart shape with perfectly aligned teeth to complement his charming look.

              "My lady," He reached for your hand to kiss your knuckles. "Hello, lovely ladybug."

              "Hello, Hobi," you gave his cheek a quick peck before he moved on to greet his other soulmates with the same gesture.

              "Doll," Jimin was like a wind as one second, he was right behind Hoseok and the next second, he was already in front of you while his arms snaked around your waist, locking them to leave no room for space between you and him. His nose caressed yours before his pillowy lips lowered down to seal a kiss with your lips.

              Pulling away at a small distance, breath mingled with his as you wished him, "Merry Christmas, prince charming," and he took your lips on his again. Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer.

              After some moment, you pulled away – because you knew he wouldn't – to let him greet his other soulmates. Just like Hoseok, Jimin was a fair and equal person as he kissed the others as well. When you thought no one else was coming, a female figure was approaching, and it was a figure you knew so well.

              "Rosie, my favourite flower!" You ran towards her with a gleeful smile. Arms opened as an invitation for her to intertwine and exchange body heat with you.

              Finally reaching you, she wrapped you with her winter coat, "(Y/N), my favourite person!"

              "You walked here?"

              She nodded, "The distance between R squad house and Q's is not that far, you know that!"

              Giggling, you broke the hug and walked her towards the door where all your soulmates have been watching your interaction with Jimin's younger sister. Once you reached them, Jimin snatched– pulled you to his side – to which Rosie rolled her eyes at her brother's unspoken possessive act.

              "Ahem," a voice interrupted.

              "Gyu!" A gasp escaped your throat once your eyes landed on the newcomer – or newcomers, plural because he wasn't alone. "I thought you wouldn't come."

              Another figure approached your crowd, and you couldn't help but smile once you saw who it was. It has been so long since you've seen them because Gyu's squad was assigned to a mission in China. Minghao reached out to you for a greeting hug as jested on his soulmate, "He? Wouldn't come? He was literally so excited when you sent us the invitation."

              "Of course, I would come, lotus," Mingyu rolled his eyes at him and come to join your hug with Minghao. "I'm your life-time partner."

              "We are partners," Minghao italicised. He then directed his full attention on you as he nuzzled his face in your neck. "I miss you, dainty lotus." Although the hug didn't last long because you were pulled away by none other than Jimin. Minghao was bewildered at the sudden loss of warmth, but Rosie patted his shoulder with a shake of her head, "Don't mind it."

              Another voice entered the scene with sassiness, "Are you guys done yet?"

              Sunoo walked to the door of the house. He had arrived shortly after Taehyung and helped Jin in the kitchen. He crossed his arms as he said, "Close the door because it's so freaking cold outside."

              "Jeez, Sunoo," Minghao slung his arms around the younger's shoulders. "Cut that sassiness, it's Christmas!"

              Rosé jumped on the duo cheerfully, "Right? Chill a bit," she said with a light tone.

              "I am chill," he slapped Minghao's chest playfully. "Just close the door and get it you guys. It's freezing outside."

              You chuckled before urging them to get warm inside. Jimin was still by your side as all of them walked towards the living room until he saw Taehyung on the couch. All your soulmates that have just newly come immediately greeted him. Jimin hogged him and smothered him with kisses on the face and one deep kiss on the lips. You watched the duo fondly. The eight of you might have shared a deep bond but maybe Jimin and Taehyung shared an even deeper bond with each other, and you admired it.

              You saw Yoongi already making his way towards you and with expectant arms, you welcomed him into your embrace as he slotted in perfectly by your side. It brought back old memories where you had always thought Yoongi was a person that hates physical touch, though it was true to an extent because he was only touchy with his soulmates and especially with you but loathed having skin contact even the slightest with other than listed.

              "Merry Christmas, guys," Jin walked into the living space as he greeted them one by one including your friends. The apron that he has been stuck with has finally been removed from his body and his clothes have changed. "Let's eat before the food gets cold."

              You let yourself be situated in between Namjoon and Hoseok at the dining table and enjoyed the food Jin had cooked with so much love – helped by your members and Sunoo as well – The room was filled with chatter and laughter as the food goes down into everyone's stomach. They went from KCCG matters, as you asked Mingyu and Minghao about their mission in China – you knew they wouldn't have a difficult time in China given that Minghao knew the way around the country – to some random topic to not let an awkward silence fill in the room.

              Before Christmas, all of them including you had made an astounding achievement that you would like to consider this Christmas celebration as a celebration not just for the festive season but also for them. Rosé and Tae's squads joined hands in the 2nd Wipe Out Operation conducted by Namjoon, S2 Squad; you, Jimin, Jungkook, Jin and Yoongi, was successful during the Owl Suppression Operation that was led by Hoseok, and the latest; Mingyu and Minghao's mission in China.

              It has been a tough, hectic weeks, but everything was successful and everyone was safe as they returned in one piece. You were glad your soulmates were willing to celebrate Christmas along with your friends – especially Mingyu and Minghao. You knew your soulmates would very much want to celebrate this festive season with the company of eight, and that was why you were glad they had agreed to celebrate it together.

              Also given that it was the first Christmas you got to celebrate with your soulmates.

              The first Christmas where you get to celebrate with your loved ones, your first love.

              The first Christmas you get to create lots of memorable memories with your loved ones.

              It was the very first true Christmas you celebrated after your parents' death.

All rights reserved © 2022 kthyg. Do not copy, translate, modify or repost without permission. Feedback is very much appreciated. It keeps me motivated! Send me an ask !!

[etes-secrecy-post]

Hi, before I explain my post, I want to say something important.

• What you see my blog has become a major overhaul. And despite the changes, I decided that my 2nd account will be now my artwork blog with a secret twist.

⚠️NEW RULE! (W/ BIGGER TEXT!)⚠️

⚠️ SO PLEASE DO NOT SHARE MY 2nd ACCOUNT TO EVERYONE! THIS SECRECY BLOG OF MINE IS FOR CLOSES FRIENDS ONLY!⚠️

• AND FOR MY CLOSES FRIENDS, DON’T REBLOG IT. INSTEAD, JUST COPY MY LINK AND PASTE IT ON YOUR TUMBLR POST! JUST BE SURE THE IMAGE WILL BE REMOVED AND THE ONLY LEFT WAS THE TEXT.

⚠️ SHARING LINKS, LIKE POSTS, REBLOG POSTS, STEALING MY SNAPSHOT PHOTOS/RECORDED VIDEOS/ARTWORKS (a.k.a. ART THIEVES) OR PLAGIARIZING FROM UNKNOWN TUMBLR STRANGERS WILL IMMEDIATELY BE BLOCKED, RIGHT AWAY!⚠️

😡 WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT EVER LIKED & REBLOG MY SECRET POST! THIS IS FOR MY SECRET FRIENDS ONLY, NOT YOU! 😡

Okay? Capiche? Make sense? Good, now back to the post…↓

Title: My "Baggy Cloth-Ober" Day 4: 🐱🎧

Hello, October! 🎃🦇 My daily "Baggy Cloth-Ober" continues with our next daily Inktober! 🧢👕🧤👖🧦👟😊

If you haven't seen my previous related post, then please click these: ↓ • Day 1: Maxwell 🐰🖌️ • Day 2: May 🐰👊💥 • Day 3: Sam 🦊⚽

DAY 4: Mikey's A/W Clothes 🐱🎧

• Back in Oct 2015, Mikey's OG A/W Clothes [CLICK ME!] didn't interest me yet pretty A-Okay, to be honest (unlike May's OG A/W). That is until Nov 2018, when my A-Pal re-working his line of OC's A/W Clothes, and I became interested, including Mikey's new comfy hoodie and design. 🥰🤗 A perfect attire if they want it to wear his while listening to calm and collected music, like my favorite Lo-Fi. 🎧🎶😌 His A/W attire has been upgraded by Miya Speedster 🐶🐺⭐ and her family tree on Christmas Day 🎄🎁, when he presented a brand new Beats by Dre Solo HD Red Edition 🔴🎧 (which is a fitting color for him, and I used to wear that back in my College days), and a new pair of gloves by Miya! 🧤😁 Truth be told, Mikey does have his own gloves but we haven't seen him wearing his OG, since his debut. Who knows if Mikey want us to share his OG gloves, soon? 🤷‍♀️ But, in the meantime, he'll be stick with his brand new gloves along side with his new headphones! 😊 Miya, on the other hand, receives her owned A/W clothes and other accessories by Mikey and it became her favorite comfort clothing 🐱🎧❤️🧢👕🧤👖🧦👟, alongside with her boyfriend Sammir's old clothes (2019 version) 💙💛🌩️👕👖🧦👟, and Brown's A/W clothes 🥜🧢👕🧤👖🧦👟, as well (the latter will be next). Lucky you! 😊 Although, Spot 🐶🏎️, Riya 🐰🏎️, and other selected OCs had also gifted their owned Mikey's A/W Clothes before Miya. 😉

Well, that's all for now. More daily "Baggy Cloth-Ober" artworks to come, until the end (of October)! 😊

Mikey's A/W Clothes - owned by @bryan360

[the-kings-chambers]

The King’s Chambers Recs - December 2022

Hello, 

Happy Holidays, Merthur fans! We are back again with a festive monthly rec list of some of our favourite winter/holiday themed fanworks recommended by some of our members! 

All of the recs are top/dom!Arthur with bottom/sub!Merlin unless stated otherwise.

Fic

We Wish You A Merry Ofsted | nomical | Explicit | 37,343w Summary: A story that chronicles the lives of our gang as teachers and students leading up to the winter holidays. Merlin and Arthur are dumb face in love as usual, but it takes them a while to get any traction. Merlin has a lot to learn and Arthur just cares too damn much. Their colleagues are fed up, the kids are okay, Merlin and Arthur can't catch a break, and everyone loves Gwen. So not much different than canon. (Frottage, no top/bottom)

Something More Palatable | Camelittle | Explicit | 2,465w Summary: Arthur is the first ever vegan Great British Bake-off Champion. His long-suffering husband, Merlin, has the onerous job of testing all Arthur’s bakes in the lead up to publishing a vegan Christmas recipe book.

Fizz the Season | TheDragon | Explicit | 3,854w Summary: "You're not seriously thinking of buying that?"

Merlin whirls around to look at the man who spoke. Tall, fit, blond hair, blue eyes. Immaculately pressed suit, leather shoes, an expensive-looking gold watch on his wrist.

And a smirk on his face that marks him as an absolute prat.

A Midwinter Tradition | rotrude | Explicit | 8,176w Summary: Ever since once battling a witch, Merlin and Arthur have developed a Yule tradition of their own. It's private, comforting, and it warms more than just the heart.

Just Another New Year's Eve | schweet_heart | Teen and Up | 2,900w Summary: It's New Year's Eve, and Arthur is once again trying to get up the nerve to tell his best friend that he's in love with him.

Of course, it would help if Merlin didn't already appear to be having the time of his life with someone else. (No sex, first kiss)

I'll Be Home (For Christmas) | bevinkathryn | Explicit | 3,814w Summary: Merlin and Arthur decorate their home for Christmas, and Arthur gets his present early.

A Royal Christmas | flowersheep | Explicit | 25,928w Summary: Merlin wasn't sure what to expect when his boyfriend revealed himself to be a prince, but it certainly didn't involve being whisked off to a place he'd never even heard of before for the holiday season. Add in a hostile king, a devious princess, and a ball and Merlin is starting to feel more like he's landed himself in some bizarre fairytale. But as long as he's got Arthur, everything will be fine.

Right?

Art

ART: All I Want For Christmas | schweet_heart | Teen and Up | Digital Art Summary: After months of pining, Merlin seizes the moment (and his destiny) when he finds Arthur under the mistletoe at the office Christmas party.

Drawn for Winter Knights Fest 2019. (No sex, kissing)

careful with the baubles.. | brolinskeep | Mature | Digital Manip Summary: xmas/new year gift exchange for my dearest Graciela (Nudity)

The elf prince | lao_paperman | Explicit | Digital Art Summary: When Prince Arthur entered the Elven kingdom, he came with the intention of declaring peace between his father's kingdom and the elven king Balinor. He befriended with the elves Gwaine and Pervical right away but he seemed to have only eyes for the Elfprince Merlin.

[paladin-of-nerd-fandom65]

No need to apologize ppl are busy I understand ;)

1: what’s their biggest pet peeve?

2: what’s something they both can’t agree on? Best spider-man actor, best Star Wars trilogy, etc…

3: what’s their favorite & least favorite animated Christmas movies?

4: is Jon & mar’is reaction the same as the duo when they react to: somebody getting hit in the nuts both real life & movie/cartoon, toliet humor, & the whole rikishi stink face thing?

5: for the duo, what’s the best gift they got for each other? I can see Jake giving Chris a blue domino mask with white lenses.

6: are the duo fans of the game awards? If so, what game are they hoping for win game of the year?

7: not really a question but I like the little fanfic snippet of “Lava bridges & you” would love to see a full fanfiction of that, would love to help to ;)

Thanks for your patience. It’s very appreciated ;-)@gothicghost2000

1) For Chris, while getting his superhero identity confused with Dick’s Nightwing is an all too common way to annoy him a bit, a far bigger one for him would be hearing and looking at comments of all sorts that claim Superman being a ‘lame’, ‘boring’, ‘Un-relatable’ and overall ‘dull excuse’ of a superhero who should step aside in favor of any other heroes, especially Batman, just because they’re ‘cooler’ and ‘edgier’. Yeah he doesn’t take it too kindly deep down of people having those thoughts about his adopted dad. Frankly neither Jon nor him is they would be honest.

For Jake, it’s from what he can admit is a tad bit more petty on his end and he apologizes for it. That said, do not mock the original Discowing in front of him. Jake looks up to that first suit his father made with pride and he will not be taking any badmouthing against it if he can help it, No siree. Not even family members are other Titans are safe from his objections to their opinions should they make fun of Discowing

2) Best Star Wars film (Chris votes on A New Hope while Jake firmly believes it’s The Force Awakens) , Best Pizza Place (Jake will always back the local Marv and George’s while Chris favors Shakey’s) , Fairly Oddparents (Jake) vs Jimmy Neutron (Chris) but most of all and most fiercely, the Best Godzilla film ever made (besides the 1954 OG; Chris champions Godzilla vs Monster Zero while Jake touts King of the Mosnters 2019 as the best)

3) Chris

- Favorite: Elf (2005) (Not just for the obvious reason of it being funny as heck but also since it deals with themes of adoption and trying to fit in, he can relate so well with Buddy)

- Least Favorite: Grandma Got Ran Over By a Reindeer (Mainly cause the song it’s based on just sounds too morbid for a cherry beat and tone)

Jake

- Favorite: The Muppet Christmas Carol (Alfred and him almost every single time at the family’s Christmas party do a karaoke of ‘A Thankful Heart’)

- Least Favorite: The Nutcracker 3D: The Untold Story (Those visuals all throughout the movie….he can never get them out of his head no matter how hard he tries)

4) More or less almost the same though Jon is tad bit more likely to have a small chuckle with watching a Stink Face as long as it’s short and against a true heel. Mar’i also doesn’t cringe as hard with nut shots as she had seen her Dad pull that off during Father-Daughter patrols together sometimes and the reactions from the crooks who receive are pretty funny form a distance.

5) While Jake’s best gift for Chris was that mask as described, in turn thanks to Chris, Jake was given a rare one of a kind 12-inch replica of Voltron which being a fan of, all to well bringing a big smile to Jake’s face

6) They’re a bit more casual than most when it comes to those shows as the Duo really only enjoy the games they play and Jude on their own merits. That said as for this year, Chris and Jake are hoping for Super Mario Bros Wonder to win Game of the Year as they love that one

7) You know maybe later this month I can write a small snippet to expand it. Not saying it’s a guarantee but it’s certainly an idea now that you brought it up lol

[cartograffiti]

January '24 reading diary

I finished a whopping 17 books in January, thanks to picking up a lot of quicker reads (novellas! poetry! manga!), and a bunch of them were really exciting!

At Christmas, my mother bought a copy of Taskmaster: 220 Extraordinary Tasks for Ordinary People for the assembled family to pass among ourselves. It's fun and funny, but there's very little in it I'm likely to try. It's also worth noting that the book was published in 2018 and Alex Horne ran a contest alongside it, which means that there are some prompts with a 2019 deadline, and some that require going to specific places in the United Kingdom.

Some cookbooks! Pieometry: Modern Tart Art and Pie Design for the Eye and the Palate was another Christmas gift to me, by the amazing Instagram sensation Lauren Ko. I've always found her very precise decorations intimidating, and I doubt I'll attempt more than the simplest of the ones she gives instructions for here, but they're inspiring to look at, and I very much want to try some of the recipes for interesting fillings and naturally colored crusts.

I picked up Snacking Bakes by Yossy Arefi after seeing someone claim that an earlier Arefi book, Snacking Cakes, had changed the landscape of home baking in the US. I found the recipes in Bakes really basic, but I hopped into the much longer hold line for Cakes, so maybe in a couple of months I can tell you how much that's hype.

I probably won't make anything from Tasting History by Max Miller, but I like him on YouTube, and expected that. This is a book for reading about historical cooking, and the recipes are a bonus if one really intrigues you. Nice details, well laid out.

It fit in nicely with a couple of reading challenges to read a Pablo Neruda collection--I chose The Essential Neruda on the basis that Hoopla had it--and I enjoyed it hugely. I'd read Neruda poems from time to time as a child and student, mostly ones about nature and love, but this collection has a nice breadth to it, introducing me to examples of his work that deal with labor exploitation and political events. I can't speak to the quality of translation, but even only knowing his work in English, I find the rhythm and imagery really special and memorable. I'm especially fond of "Drunk as Drunk on Turpentine." He's one of the most famous Chilean writers, and I'm glad to be more familiar now with the reasons why.

Last month, I said that my mother and I had started working through a hard Nick Bantock puzzle book, and we were very impressed with it. It's called The Egyptian Jukebox, and it's a succession of interesting puzzles about interpreting the contents of photographed shadowbox "drawers." Mom, who is an excellent codebreaker, worked out a core mechanic pretty swiftly, while I floundered with wrong approaches for a bit and then asked her to confirm whether I was finally on the right track; that made the first few pages the hardest part, and the rest relied more heavily on my strengths of observation and lateral thinking. We both found the final solution extra fun because of a personal connection, but I think the journey will be satisfying enough for most puzzlers.

I've been trying to read literally any Becky Chambers book for multiple years without getting around to it, but this month I listened to the audiobooks of A Psalm for the Wild-Built and A Prayer for the Crown-Shy and just adored them. This is a duology about Sibling Dex, a monk whose role is to serve tea and listen to people's problems, and Mosscap, the first robot anyone has seen since robots became sapient and withdrew from human society, generations ago. They travel together, with beautiful writing about nature, spirituality, and various kinds of social responsibility. Every bit as good as I'd heard.

Dumb Witness is a solid mid-range Agatha Christie mystery (which is to say better than most people's), an inheritance murder plot involving a letter sent months after it was dated, interesting poison facts, and key evidence from a dog. It's a bit dated, because it relies on subverting some ideas about mental health and xenophobia that have changed since 1937. I can appreciate what she did, but at a remove.

More than one of the reading challenges I'm doing this year call for reading a manga. I like manga, but I probably haven't read any in about 10 years, since I read all sorts of Clamp and shoujo and shounen with high school friends. I fell off as my tastes moved to series aimed at young adults, which were at the time harder to find in my area. Anyway, I'm excited to have gotten sucked into a manga again! I'd seen some of Shirahama Kamome's beautiful art from Witch Hat Atelier and I quickly fell in love with the story, which surrounds Coco, a young witch being taught to work magic using art supplies. The interpersonal relationships are strong, the apprentices are real people with distinct outlooks, and the larger plot about what kinds of magic are banned, and whether they should be, is fascinating. I tore through volumes 1-5, and I have two more checked out and another on hold. Both cheerful and serious, original, and not set in a school environment. Lovely, and one of several things motivating me to try drawing again lately.

The Emelan group read has gone into the Circle Reforged novels, and we're reading in chronological order. Battle Magic was...fine? Not the most interesting Pierce major arc, but lots of interesting things woven through it. It was written in her period of slower pacing, which I don't like as much.

I know several big fans of Dorothy Dunnett's 16th century historical fiction drama the Lymond Chronicles, and oh man am I on the boat now too. The Game of Kings is so confusing (complimentary), full of emotion and grabby characters, and I fell in love. She expects a lot of her readers. I sent in the chat where I'm live blogging that, "Here's an obscure Ancient Roman. Now understand an allusion to how a particular beetle moves. Jokes in five languages. And there's even a plot." Sometimes it's overwhelming, but it's also exactly my kind of thing, every chapter has at least one perfect scene, and Dunnett does some incredible literary magic tricks. One night I felt like I felt like I was being crushed in a vise. I'm already reading the next one, which has a reveal that made me stop reading for fully 40 minutes while I unpicked what I'd missed. I want to write fanfiction. God.

And yesterday I put on a sim game and listened in one sitting to all of Malka Older's The Mimicking of Known Successes, a wonderful sci-fi novella about a detective (Mossa) on Jupiter collaborating with her former college girlfriend (Pleiti) to investigate a case that touches on Pleiti's research, the study of ecological history with the hope of repairing Earth's ecosystem enough for humanity to return to it. Their chemistry is great, the plot is clever, and the dialogue in particular is shiny and tender. I found a couple of world-building beats underdeveloped--there's a thing about "conservative" being a slur in this future that I don't think stuck the landing of indicating the threat being conservative posed to people who had to change or die--but I look forward to reading the next.

[landofwindandskyscrapers]

21/52 The Sol Majestic: A Review

Sci-fi cooking in SPAAAACEEEEE!!

This was actually a gift from Christmas 2019…I’m quite embarrassed I finished it only now.

Nevertheless, this should give you an idea of how…gripping it is.

At least in my opinion; I’d started reading it quite some time ago, but stopped in the middle and then life got in the way.

Oddly enough, the author (Ferrett Steinmetz) is one of my favorite authors, and I’ve been following him since before he started writing - reading his blog is one of my formative experiences.

But…

The whole book revolves around the protagonist deciding to fake his religion/phylosophy in order to protect the quadruple-michelin-starred restaurant that finally gave him help.

But at no point is the “Inevitable Phylosophy” of his parents, his people etc. adequately explained.

This…undermines the stakes of the story a lot, for me.

Seeing this kid struggle because he has to invent his own inevitable phylosophy to announce to the world loses its bite when I don’t understand why a marketing slogan couldn’t possibly fit the bill.

Although…

It’s possible that the book would mean a lot more for a food enthusiast.

I…don’t really care that much about food. It can be good, I’ll eat almost anything, eating food from other cultures is a low-key interest of me+my wife (EEEEEEEE)…

But I dislike cooking very much, and if I had to eat Soylent for the rest of my life in exchange for a couple million dollars I’d probably do it.

So maybe some other person would enjoy the description of sci-fi dishes a lot. (Oh yeah, the novel is set in SPAAAACCEEEEE).

But as it is….I think Excel Macros For Dummies will be a more gripping read for me.

[zwriteseverything]

I was thinking about this Christmas and how sad I am about the whole situation and how could this possibly be happening.

But to be honest Christmas for me is always a home run or just a complete miss.

To start, this isn’t the first time where I am alone for Christmas, I mean my whole life has been more basically “surviving” through Christmas since I was a child. The first Christmas memory that I had clearly was building ginger bread houses with some woman who her name escapes me but she lived near by and I remember eating the hard gummy candy that you used for the lights and since then dots candy have always been a go to candy for me during the holidays. I remember that Christmas wasn’t about the gifts or presents but the time we spent with that woman. I remember it being the whole day of just fun activities and laughter. The best part about that memory is watching my brother and sister just having the time of their life. Now notice how neither one of my parents are present for this story and I don’t think that is a coincidence. My memory cannot recall what happened that day or where they were or what was going on. Just remember them not being around.

Now, from that Christmas forward, there was every excuse in the world on why we didn’t want to celebrate Christmas from everyone in my life. The closest second great Christmas I had was probably 5 years ago now 2019. Alex and I were together at the time and him and I just blew all the money we had to spoil each other and our families. It was a beautiful experience and we went on vacation and it was a wonderful time. Everyone has some fun, actually Alex was also really sick 😷 I remember but he still had so much fun.

There have been some very, very lonely Christmas’s as well because I have be with individuals who believe that Christmas is just a marketing tactic used to sell goods to people around the world. It’s just a money making scheme, blah, blah, blah. I also find that these are the same people who cannot have fun at places like Disney Land. Ok, if Christmas is all about spending money, and whatever else please tell me how your missing the whole that is the days Jesus was born part because now your just being illogical and picking points that fit your argument. Those were the Christmas’ spent in strange places.

For example, Colorado, I was sooooo drunk and high that night, I took myself out. I mean I was surrounded by co-workers and they were all doing dumb shit. Not a single person is excluded from that, give adults unlimited money, little freedom and it’s just becomes uncontrollable chaos. You try to stay away from it but when your alone in a hotel room during the holidays you just drink the pain away. But the moment I come home and my mom just ruins the holidays, it reminds me of why I choose Christmas away from my own kin.

I had some lonely Christmas with my ex Jack, ohhhh when I was a kid and my mom would be working all day and I would be alone with the kids.

I’ve put the tree up at least 4 times by myself,

My Christmas decorations were thrown out by my mom this year. All of them. I have been collecting them for 7 years 😭

It’s always something…

[dzpenumbra]

3/16/23

It's 4:15 AM. I just got done with my stream. I started streaming around 11:30ish, I was planning on just doing a quick little stream I guess. "Quick little Rimworld stream." Riiiiiiiiiight...

People... showed up. I got 3 new followers! Some dude came by and chatted and I introduced him to Rimworld and gave him the lowdown, it was really nice connecting a new person to the game. And a guy from my past, from literally a past life (different username, back when I'd get really high and play Wreckingball in Overwatch QuickPlays), he dropped in and reconnected. Literal fucking strangers from 4 years ago dropped by my stream and my "friends", shit... my own brother who also games... wouldn't. I guess that's why they're... ex-friends, eh? Enough mourning that shit, I'll save my grief for those who actually wanted to spend time with me.

Today was just... super different. A very different vibe to it. Like light was shining into my life. Like... I had this golden light pouring into my apartment in my preview cam on Betterhelp today, and it caught my eye. And that feels very symbolic of my day. My new desk came today. It is really cool, it's electric and it saves certain heights, so I can press a button and switch it from sitting desk to standing desk. Super fucking fancy, big thanks to my mom for splurging on that one as a christmas gift that literally just got here. I spent most of the day putting it together and relocating my computer. It's weird having the whole desktop tower sitting on top of the table, but I think I really need to do that... because I don't know how I'm going to have the cables rigged if it's on the floor... so it can still adjust, you know? I don't know, it works for now, that's the important part.

In therapy, I talked about grief. About how I haven't really had the opportunity to grieve my cat the way I grieved my dog, no one to really process it with. And those around me haven't really treated it with the same delicate nature they did when Cerry passed. People near me were thoughtful and gentle then. This time, not so much. At least it feels that way.

I tried to communicate that... like... I haven't really let myself engage with the loss feelings as much with Max. Which sucks. I'm just... very geographically far away from anyone who might even pat me on the back, you know? And it's hard to be emotionally vulnerable in that way... even with myself... when comfort is not available if the grief gets too deep. Like existential-freakout-deep. Maybe I'm reading into that too much. That, in itself, feels like a PTSD response. And I think it is.

This whole "I can't let myself feel sad unless I have someone around to comfort me" thing. Why? Because of Spring/Summer 2019. When I didn't give a fuck. When I didn't let Fear make decisions for me. When I made a blood oath with myself in my Zen garden to never let Fear make decisions on my behalf ever again. And then Fear consumed me, like I challenge the God of Fear himself. Ironically, Phobos is the greek god of Fear/Panic... accompanying his brother Deimos, god of Terror/Dread. Both moons of Mars, and sons of Ares, the god of War. Perfectly natural that both anticipatory dread and frenzied panic would be born of war. And, interestingly enough, I was going to name Maxine "Phobos". That was initially going to be her name, when I originally got her... until I decided it was a bit too dark, and not really fitting to name such a friendly and confident cat as her after Fear itself. I came up with Max as a backup, which just fit a bit better. Then, when the vet gave me an impromptu gender reveal... the name was going to change to "Phoebe", but the name just didn't fit either. And when the vet asked what to put on her records? We went with Maxine, and it was kinda serendipitous that my backup name happened to be androgynous.

I am seeing very clearly now why there are two gods there - panic and terror. They are different feelings, aren't they? Panic being like... being on a battlefield and needing to flee. And terror/dread being... impending doom, anticipation, the unknown, something lurking outside your door. And I have definitely gotten a healthy dialogue going with Phobos. For a while now. And I can stare that fucker in the eyes and have a chat with him now. Much better than before. But Deimos and I, on the other hand...

It seems like that's really my problem. It's not that I'm in the middle of a freak out right now and I want to run the fuck away. It's that I'm scared of putting myself in that situation... and not having the proper tools... or having it go very wrong. And I don't even have a clear image of what "wrong" looks like there. What... I get really sad and my heart feels like a black hole and I cry uncontrollably and I just want someone to hold me and reminisce on how cool of a cat she was... and how hard it was to see her suffer so much... and... there's just no one available to do that with? Like... that's right now. I literally just did that... and the world didn't end... Why the fuck am I so scared of it? Why will I avoid grieving... just to avoid acknowledging that I am forced to grieve alone? That I have no choice but to grieve alone.

I guess it's avoiding that reality.

I connected that intuitively to 2019, that was when I still had a friend or two in the bank. Or at least the losses were very fresh, at least it felt like I had friends in my back pocket. By the end of that summer, I had run through them all. I reached out AA-style to literally everyone. My good friend I met through Minecraft, who I was Best Man for. My college friend who I was also groomsman for. My former best friend in college, whose daughter I was godfather to. Her husband, who I was better friends with than I was with her... My ex-girlfriend from college, the only one I ever really - I typed "loved" and deleted it, I don't think it was love, it was very intense infatuation. Love is mutual. My former best friend from highschool, who was a deadbeat mom of 5 working at an audio company that catered concerts and shit, living with a boyfriend she was clearly using to pay her rent for her while she spent all her cash buying cocaine and fucking local wannabe rappers. (Don't worry, things worked out great with that plan, last time I saw her she was homeless, lost like 100 lbs and was being summoned to court on charges of accessory to trafficking fentanyl across state lines). I even reached out to my old bandmate in college, who used to be my actual best friend... who blew me off time and time again, and that time was no exception. I mean, I reached out to everyone. I even reached out to my most recent ex, at that point, it was probably about 6 months that we had been broken up and she still lived in the same small town. Everyone.

And I struck out.

So... that fucked me up. My panic and dread went haywire after that. Because I learned first-hand that if something bad happened, if I needed a friend, anything... no one was coming. It was a weird transition. It used to be "I don't want to bother them", or "they've got enough going on". Now? Uh-uh. Nope. That anxiety of "shit is hitting the fan, you need to call someone"... that number is getting dialed. Only... there's no number to dial! XD

So yeah. I guess that's a complicated emotion to engage with. And it makes me avoid really big, difficult things... because I know at a very intuitive level that if something goes wrong, I'm on my own. And that's risky. Like... detoxing off of meds. I would actually keep myself on meds I hated, that I really wanted to be off of... just so I could buy time to get someone into my life to create a safe environment for me to detox off. Not just physically, but emotionally. I would just... not detox... rather than detox alone and risk my life or my sanity. Because I've had it go bad before.

But with this... I just... I can't. I have to let myself go there. Like... the dream journal the other day. I hate recording nightmares in a dream journal. I have to make myself do it. I have to force my hand over to grab it and start writing. I want nothing more than to just forget it. But those are the most important dreams. And I keep... forgetting that. I keep forgetting that really important lesson. The dreams you want to forget, that repulse you and make you feel really uncomfortable and disturbed. They're the most important. Maybe not literally, but in their message. Emotions themselves are not bad. They are just different degrees of feeling. Anger is not innately bad. Fear is not innately bad. Depression... well... we're not gonna talk about that one, that's the exception, the rule applies to the rest of it! Grief is not bad. It's what you do with it that determines whether it becomes something harmful or helpful.

And I think I've been stuffing my grief down. And avoiding it. And waiting for a person who isn't coming to process it, to engage with it, to talk about it. And... that is never healthy. Repression is never healthy. Fighting yourself is never healthy. My self looks at the bathmat where my cat was hiding in her last days, and remembers her, and wrenches my heart. My self sees the particles of litter on the banjo case next to my desk that she loved to sit on when I was gaming. And when I see those things, and feel the pain and loss that comes with it... I turn away and say "not now". "I can deal with that feeling later." But there has been no "later" for over a month, nearly a month and a half now. There was no later. I guess... later is now.

And I'll tell ya. It's not that bad. The initial shock of it is kinda the worst part. And I really hate that I'm running from her memory like this, it feels so fucking unfair to her.

Like... picture a ghost movie, right? I fucking love this analogy because it's so accessible. Any ghost movie, take your pick, but like... a true "lost soul" haunted house ghost movie. It's always someone who died unexpectedly or of tragic means. It's rarely granny who passed peacefully in her sleep. They are usually trying to communicate, and really frustrated that they can't. They don't even know they're dead half the time. They're like... stuck in time. And these memories, these visceral memories of my cat on the bathmat and on the banjo case, and sitting in her cat tree. They are my ghosts of her... er... her ghost to me? And they are trying to communicate with me, to interact with me, to engage my memory. The spirit of my cat. The essence, the memory, the remainder. And what do I do with that memory? I reject it. How fucking cruel of me. That poor girl suffered so fucking much, and I reject her memory?! -_- I feel selfish.

I hope I can just... remember. Remember that the first bit is the worst part. That you have to ride that memory roller coaster, and make sure it covers the good memories too. Don't just cling to the trauma memory, or block out all memory to spare the difficult ones. Erasing one's existence is... kinda overkill, and kinda not something kind to do to one that you love. I think, at least. So... I hope to, eventually, get to the point where I can look at the bathmat and go "that's where she hid when she was about to die... but also where she would prepare to jump up on the sink to get water, and where she'd rub up against me when I was brushing my teeth, and sit in the sink waiting for me to turn it on, which she did since she was a tiny little kitten." And that first memory will be painful, but it's isn't the end-all be-all of the thought pattern, it's the entryway to a beautiful tapestry of memories. An access point to her whole story. Not just the tragic end.

Deeply overdue for a vibe reset. The Rimworld playthrough is getting really good. The story is forming itself in really miraculous ways, as only Rimworld can. And I've already impressed several new people with my storytelling, it meant a lot to me. Like... someone told me they could see it as an "actual sci-fi story" that I was writing, which... I mean, technically I'm co-writing, but... like... that's exactly what I'm doing in front of you, bud! XD Good read! It's always very heartwarming and confidence boosting to have someone openly appreciate your skill set. Hopefully it engaged them enough that they return!

I'm going to go to bed, it's past 5 now. I'd say worth it.

[senlinyu]

Works List

Although I do occasionally cross-post to fanfiction.net, wattpad, and inkitt, most of my stories are solely on ao3. I decided to compile a full list of my works for reference rather than just keeping them buried in my FAQ.

A quick note about my stories: I have an open policy about my fics, anyone who wishes to is welcome to archive, print and bind (personally or via a non-profit fanfic bookbinder), remix, podfic, translate, write meta about, make art for, or write in the same universe/fanon as any of my fanworks. I’d love it if you send a link. Credit is appreciated but not mandatory, fandom is open source.

Avatar: The Last Airbender

The Sun, The Moon, And The Truth: art and fic collab with @elithien. Zuka/Katara. Rated: M. Post-war AU. Firelord Zuko. Water Tribe Envoy Katara. Forbidden Love. Mutual Pining. My usual.

Harry Potter:

All You Want: Draco/Hermione. Rated: E. My very smutty a/b/o fic. Eighth Year. Alpha Draco (and Theo and Neville), Omega Hermione. Miscommunication and mutual pining.

Anthology: Assorted prompted ficlets of varying lengths. All Dramione. Including:

Prompt: “He set fire to the world around him but never let a flame touch her.” Category: Angst. Rating: T

Prompt: “But how can you walk away from something and still come back to it.” Neil Gaiman. Category: Comedy, Fluff. Rating: M. 

Prompt: One bed. Rating: T. Category: Rom-com

Prompt: Harry and Draco trapped in an elevator after Draco and Hermione’s relationship has become public. Rating: T

Prompt: Draco blackmails Hermione. Rating: M Category: angst, political enemies.

Prompt: Meet me in the stairwell in a second for a glass of gin. (From the song ‘Nobody Else Will Be There’ by The National)

Prompt: Accidental pregnancy. Rating: T

Prompt: Tabula Rasa. Memory loss fic. Rating: T

Prompt: “No, no, no, stay with me. Don’t close your eyes.” Category: rom-com, fluff

Whatever You Want Granger for @nikitajobson. Rated: T

Married art and fic collab with @avendell. Rated T.

Prompt: Dramione University Students AU.

A Slow Cruel Descent: Draco/Hermione. Rated: M.

A Slow Cruel Descent. My very first angst/dark fic. Wartime AU. Voldemort doses Hermione with a love potion, making her fall in love with Draco, and then uses the threat of harming Draco to extract information. 

A Fragile Ascent. Sequel. Post-war, Hermione struggles to move on and heal from the trauma of her imprisonment. 

A Thing With[out] Feathers. Draco/Hermione. Rated: E. A plot I invented just because I wanted to write extremely indulgent wing kink. Fake relationship with benefits. Veela Hermione. Wing sex. That’s it. That’s the plot. 

The Bestiary: Assorted creature one-shots and ficlets of varying lengths. All Dramione. Including: 

Kiska: 8th Year. Hermione secretly has cat-ears and Draco is suspiciously interested in them. Rated: M for heavy petting.

Demon!Draco. Rated: M

the business we’re in: Tom Riddle Jr/Hermione. Rated: M. Mafia AU. Cleaner/Assassin Tom is given the task of killing the ‘very ordinary’ Hermione Granger. 

Compendium: A collection of prompted ficlets originally posted on tumblr. Pairings vary and are indicated in the chapter titles. Ratings and any relevant warnings are listed in the chapter summary of the particular ficlet.

Cordial Enemies: writing collab with @stargazing121. Draco/Hermione. Rated: M. **WIP.** Bridgerton inspired fake relationship fic. Minstry co-workers. Tabloid news. 

Do Not Go Gentle: Severus/Hermione. Rated E. 8th Year. Hermione is suffering from a terminal curse following the war and Severus attempts to find a cure. Not ‘really’ a student/teacher relationship, but does occur at Hogwarts. Feral cat personality Severus.

Forever Is Composed of Nows: James Potter/Aurore Malfoy. Rated: T. Post-Manacled one-shot about James and Aurore. 

Height: Draco/Hermione. Rated: E. Dramione Height Differences Minifest 2020. 8th Year. Erotic hand holding. Hermione initiating the relationship. 

Ice: Draco/Hermione. Rated: T. DHr Advent 2018. Co-workers at Gringotts. Accidental bonding. 

Impress Upon You: art and fic collab with @mia-moriarty-art. Draco/Hermione. Rated: T. Deck The Halls with Dramione 2020. Draco asks Hermione to show him the Muggle world in an attempt to impress a Muggleborn. 

I Think It Might: tumblr live-write with @lovesbitca8 and @liliansilverstuff. Draco/Hermione. Rated: E. Drunk Draco. Cam Girl Granger. Crack.

The Library of Alexandria: Draco/Hermione. Rated: M. Librarian Hermione. Annoying Draco. Trapped together and required to have sex for some reason. Accidental marriage. Librarian Draco.

Little Hearth Fires: for @kumatan0720. Draco/Hermione. Rated: M. My one and only foray into entirely angst-free domestic fluff writing. Married  Dramione with bb bean Scorpius.

Love and Other Misfortunes: Draco/Hermione. Rated: M. My very first story. Veela Draco. Ministry workaholic Hermione. Veela bond where Draco will die if Hermione doesn’t mate with him. Ministry conspiracies. 

Manacled: Draco/Hermione. Rated: E. Voldemort Wins AU. Handmaid’s Tale premise. Memory loss. Espionage. Dark fic. Don’t read without checking the trigger warnings.

Manipulation: Blaise Zabini/Hermione. Rated: M. Vampire Blaise with a crush.

Nontrivial Pursuits: art and fic collab with @gubabubas-sketchbook. Draco/Hermione. Rated: M. Post-war Ministry coworkers engaging in a strip trivia competition. 

Now Is A Gift. Draco/Hermione. Rated: T. Sunbeam Hermione sets out to prove what a nice person she is by getting grumpy Draco the perfect Christmas present. DHr Advent 2019.

The Seduction: Draco/Hermione. Rated: E. Pining Draco trying to seduce Hermione by starting a bookclub and cooking dinner with her while she doesn’t notice...for two years.

The SenLithien Collaboration: art and fic collab with @elithien. Includes:

United We Stand. Rated: T

Beltane. Rated: M.

Seeker Fit. Rated: T

One Night. Rated: E

the first kiss. Rated: M

A Witch’s Wedding. Rated: T

consumed, obsessed, and attached. Rated: E

For Want of a Jumper. Rated: T

Switch. Rated: E

Power Couple. Rated: T

Insomnia. Rated: T

Fate and Plans. Rated: E

Rebirth. Rated: M

Common Spaces, Empty Places. Rated: M.

Snow Fall: Draco/Hermione. Rated: M. DHr Advent 2020. Newly weds having their first Christmas. Hermione helpfully teaches Draco muggle methods of staying warm during a blizzard.

your lonely calls to me: art and fic collab with @avendell. Draco/Hermione. Rated: T. Healer Hermione realizes that Draco is being abused in Azkaban and takes him in.

Star Wars

after the fall [we rise]: Ben Solo/Rey. Rated: E. My fix-it fic for The Rise of Skywalker. 

Binding The Light: Kylo Ren/Rey. Rated: T. Following the destruction of Starkiller, Kylo Ren obsesses over what he wants.

Reputation: Ben Solo/Rey. Rated: M. Rey is in a forced relationship with Hux and so out of spite she asks Kylo Ren to take her virginity.

Short: Ben Solo/Rey. Rated: E. Jealous Ben with a choking kink disapproves of Rey’s outfit. PWP modesty trope subversion. 

[auradon-bore-a-don]

Mobile Masterlist

The Perfect Christmas - Jaylos (Entry for the Descendants Secret Santa gift exchange 2019, Fluff, Christmas, Holiday Fic) - Jay's Perfect Christmas List: Write a Letter to Santa. Get the perfect gift.

Play in the snow. Have cookies and coco by the fire. Tell him how you feel with a kiss under the mistletoe. Hope he feels the same.

A Gift Fit for A Princess - Audrey/Evie (Entry for the Descendants Gift Exchange 2021, Fluff, Light Angst, Winter Vacation, Holiday Fic) - Finding the right gift is hard enough, finding one for a princess? Impossible. Or: Evie has 5 days to find Audrey the perfect gift for Christmas.

Up On The Lost Revenge - Huma (Entry for the Descendants Gift Exchange 2022, Fluff, Adventures upon the Lost Revenge) - When Uma hears an unusual noise in the early morning on the Lost Revenge, she expects the worst. Nothing prepared her for what was actually happening

See Me (Sightless) - Ever since Uma escaped Cotillion, Harry has waited for her in their favorite spot. But as months go by, Harry is starting to wonder why she hasn't shown yet.

Snowfall - Ben/Jay (Entry for the Descendants Gift Exchange 2023, Fluff)

“You coming out or what?” Jay didn’t turn around as Ben straightened in the doorway. Realizing he’d been caught, Ben closed the door to the tower behind him. “I don’t bite,” Jay shot Ben a smirk over his shoulder. “Unless you ask.”

Desktop Masterlist

[swissmissficrecs]

Favorite Sherlock Holmes fics from 2020

Usually I put a bunch of explanations and disclaimers on these lists but you know what, it was a weird year and I’m not going to try to justify or apologize for what I read or didn’t read so here are my favorites that were completed last year, in descending order of length:

and your very flesh shall be a great poem by CaitlinFairchild (151K, E, Johnlock) After a tragic confrontation with terrible consequences, Sherlock and John follow Mary as she flees to America.

Drawn to Stars by Silvergirl (107K, E, Johnlock, Sherlock/OMC) After the Culverton Smith case Sherlock is clean, working, and looking for a romantic partner—since John has told him that’s what he needs. Shame John didn’t mention he was interested in that role himself, before Sherlock went off to Rome with a gorgeous Italian copper to try to fall in love and become a complete human being. (This one is very slightly cheating because it was finished on 30 Dec 2019, but it didn't make it onto my 2019 list because I didn't read it until after I'd made the list. And it deserves to be on a Best Of list, so here it is.)

Thermocline by J_Baillier (83K, M, Johnlock) John "Five Oceans" Watson — technical dive instructor, dive accident analyst and weapon of mass seduction — meets recluse professor of maritime archaeology Holmes. As they head out to a remote archipelago off the coast of Guatemala to study and film its shipwrecks for a documentary, will sparks fly or fizzle out?

Do No Harm by Calais_Reno (79K, T, Johnlock) In 1923, Dr John Watson is on trial for the murder of his lover, Mary Morstan, a writer of popular mysteries. If convicted, he will hang. Sherlock Holmes sets out to prove his innocence, but finds himself more and more infatuated with the handsome doctor, and deeper and deeper inside the bohemian world of London's painters, playwrights, and poets. Will he uncover the evidence needed to acquit him in time?

To Be Human by ohlooktheresabee (78K, NR, Johnlock) There is a serial killer on the loose with a penchant for collecting the brains of his victims. Sherlock, John and Scotland Yard are on the case, but something about the chosen victims has Sherlock on edge. While they piece together the clues that will lead to the killer, John begins to realize that the way his best friend thinks may sometimes be more a hindrance than a help….

immediate and inglorious by simplyclockwork (72K, E, Johnlock) Bodies are showing up in back alleys, with no sign of a struggle, no trace of drugs. If not for the strangulation bruises on their necks and the scythe carved into their left shoulders, they could have died peacefully, in their sleep. With New Scotland Yard dumbfounded by the Grim Reaper Killer case, Sherlock is called in to consult. The more he investigates, the deeper Sherlock finds himself drawn into the work of London's newest serial killer. As his views of good and bad begin to blur, he risks losing himself to a darkness he never imagined. And, even more pressing: where does John Watson, grieving ex-boyfriend of the Grim Reaper's latest victim, fit into all of this?

Curtain Rising by tiger_in_the_flightdeck (61K, E, Johnlock) A disgraced television star is the target of a series of death threats just after a theatre production’s adaptation of The Sound of Music is announced with her as the lead. The suspect list is a mile long and growing, Rosie Watson is in the spotlight, and Sherlock might be getting too fond of his time on stage to focus on the case. With opening night approaching, can he and John figure out who wants their client dead before her final curtain rises?

The Fire Finds a Home by fearfully_beautifully_made (61K, E, Johnlock) After Sherlock and John decide to give having a relationship a go, this is how their relationship starts to develop. There a little bit of plot, if you squint, but it was mostly an excuse to write John and Sherlock having sex in a lot of different ways and learning to love each other.

Borrowed Ghosts by DiscordantWords (57K, M, Johnlock) In the aftermath of the Culverton Smith case, John spent one painfully stilted afternoon hanging out with Sherlock. He counted the minutes, finished his tea, and left for home without ever clearing the air between them. And once he'd left, he found it very hard to go back.

You Might Just as Well Be Blind by ArwaMachine (56K, E, Johnlock) When a serial killer starts targeting couples, Sherlock and John must do what they have to do in order to get to the bottom of things. Unfortunately, John already has a girlfriend. Surely pretending to be in a relationship with Sherlock won't pose any problems with his relationship, will it?

The Broken Tether by J_Baillier (54K, M, Johnlock) Maybe he thinks that you only enjoy his company because of the Work, because of the way his dazzling intellect shines when he's in his element, but the truth is this: it is when he is at his most human, most bare, that you feel closest to him.

how the light gets in by subtext-is-my-division (Quill_A)  (54K, E, Johnlock) Red wine always makes him tipsier than usual and he finds himself saying, the words slurring a bit. “You know, I’ve got to ask. Do you always shoot cabbies for people you barely you know?” John meets his gaze over the rim of his glass, and there’s something there that Sherlock can’t pin down. “Not for everyone,” he says, meaningfully, pointedly, his smile all teeth.

Erosion by saintscully (53K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock’s father falls ill, leaving the surviving family members broken and rudderless. James Sholto shows up in London unexpectedly, his intentions unclear. John has to navigate the consequences of crime, illness and death and their impact on his frayed relationship with Sherlock.

Hold You Like a Weapon by MissDavis (52K, E, Johnlock) Eurus shows up at 221B Baker Street in labour. Things go downhill from there.

Chances Are by Berty (51K, M, Johnlock) Sherlock is spending some time in his mind palace - so far, so normal. But why is John there, why do things keep changing and why are there only two exits from the sitting room at 221B, neither of which seem to go anywhere useful? It's a case like no other for Sherlock Holmes and John Watson.

Sine Nomine by SilentAuror (45K, E, Johnlock) As Mycroft reviews the footage from Culverton Smith's morgue, he revisits his original question: whether John Watson would be the making of his brother, or make him worse than ever. He's come to a conclusion, but decides to give John one last chance. So he gives him a choice.

Cockaigne by HollyShadow88 (38K, E, Johnlock) When John’s contacted by an old uni friend about problems in his new art exhibition, he doesn’t think it will be worth Sherlock’s time. After a glance of the crime scene, however, they’re both pulled into the project in ways John didn’t expect. Will a week of erotic performance art finally be enough to bring them together in the way they both secretly hope? (Spoiler: it’s a tropey fic, of course it will)

Written in Ashes by 88thParallel (37K, M, Johnlock) Sherlock becomes the prime suspect in a homicide case, and recently unearthed memories of his childhood are complicating matters. It's up to John to track down answers — can he help Sherlock before it's too late?

A Desperate Indulgence by LollipopCop (34K, M, Johnlock) John thinks it's 2012 after waking up with amnesia, having no memory of Mary. Sherlock, exhausted from years of tension and hiding his love, pretends they got married instead.

Inhale With Ease by Vulpesmellifera (25K, E, Johnlock) In the years after Vivian Norbury's capture, life seems to work out just as John planned. He's got that respectable job at the surgery and goes home to his wife and child. He joins Sherlock on cases a couple times per week. It's a rhythm he can live with - just enough adrenaline highs to balance out the drudgery of a normal bloke's life. Until a pandemic, and Victor Trevor, arrive in London.

The House on Rue des Boulangers by Berty (24K, M, Johnlock) After being invalided out of the army and without any other prospects, John Watson has relocated to a small town in northern France. Now he has to decide what to do for the rest of his life. One morning there's a mad stranger in his garden chasing a swarm of bees, and it seems John's decision is made.

High Mountain Tea Leaves by disfictional (23K, E, Johnlock) A mountaintop robbery on a Japanese-occupation-era train where the only item stolen was a small case of mysterious tea leaves in a backpack? An ideal Christmas gift, two days late. Sherlock convinces John to travel for tea.

Detours by saintscully (22K, M, Johnlock, Sherlock/OMC) During the better part of the first year following Mary's death and the events at Sherrinford, Sherlock and John are slowly rebuilding their lives and their friendship. All seems (relatively) well and John takes comfort in once again being a father, a doctor and a friend. An unexplained shift in Sherlock's behaviour catches John by surprise, and he begins to worry about his place in his friend's life. John has to examine everything he thought he knew about Sherlock, himself and their relationship in order to win his rightful place yet again.

hands full of matter by simplyclockwork (21K, E, Johnlock) When Sherlock is captured in Serbia, Mycroft cannot afford to involve the British government in his rescue. Instead, he sends John. After two years spent thinking Sherlock was dead, John finds himself navigating not only Sherlock’s rescue but their fractured friendship as well.

The Victim Experience by J_Baillier (16K, T, Gen) A case takes Sherlock and John deep into the seedy underbelly of the haunted attractions industry. With audiences craving more and more intense experiences, is a real murder the next logical step?

On the Fence by BeautifulFiction (13K, T, Johnlock) The murder of the King's College fencing champion leads to revelations about Sherlock's past. Will it be the point that tips them from friends to lovers, or will they remain on the fence?

Plus bonus ACD era:

"Baker Street: The Sleep of Reason": A Memoir by John H. Watson, M.D. by Gaedhal (98K, M, Johnlock, Johniarty) This is a Victorian Era story in the "Sherlock Holmes" (2009) Ritchie-verse. The main characters are Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson and is from the doctor's memoirs. It was written before "A Game of Shadows" so there are differences in this story and film canon, mainly in the person and backstory of one particular character.

The Taste of Truth by sanguinity (25K, T, Johnlock) Two and a half years after Reichenbach, John Watson discovers the magical tree that caused Holmes to fake his death.

The Adventure of the Vatican Cameos by Garonne (18K, E, Johnlock) How should one behave when waking for the first time in the bed of one's dearest friend? Holmes and Watson solve a case in Catholic London while navigating the turbid waters of their new relationship.

Hot Water by wordybirdy (13K, E, Johnlock, Watson/Gregson) Dr. John Watson's libidinous affair with a respected Scotland Yard inspector abruptly judders to a halt when the former meets a certain Mr. Sherlock Holmes, Consulting Detective, for the very first time. The attraction between the two is strongly mutual, but misunderstandings only multiply and tensions abound, as all three men attempt to deal with the new situation.

[bobcatmoran]

Cut for a metric buttload of COVID angsting and 1st World Problems™

So. Long ago and far away, back in ye olde days when I didn’t have opinions on face mask styles and the idea that I’d be able to work from home for even one day was laughable when there wasn’t an actual freaking blizzard or, I dunno, the office burned down, I bought season tickets for the local Broadway touring show program for the 2019-20 season. Needless to say, the last several shows did not happen when they were supposed to, and I was saddened because there were a few shows in it I was particularly looking forward to. One was the new production of “Oklahoma!” which I saw a month(ish? time has ceased to have meaning) ago and was kind of disappointed with. The other was “Come From Away,” which I’ve longed to see ever since I first heard the positive buzz about it, and which I might never get the chance to see again.

My tickets for it are on the 14th. Omicron is well and truly surging where I am. And I…I dunno, I think I’ll probably go regardless, with the good-fitting KN95 masks that I’ve found, and with a rapid test the day before (can’t find the at-home tests for love or money, and the gap between the need-to-be-at meeting I have at work and the show isn’t enough to guarantee I’ll get results from the state’s rapid testing sites, which I made an appointment for the day prior to the show because of that) but I’m uneasy about it. 

And I’m stressed because I missed seeing Grandma (who is 94 years old and diabetic) over Christmas since Dad tested positive on the 23rd and I’d just been over to have a rare Family Dinner with him a couple days before. I’ve still got her Christmas gift waiting because I can’t stay completely isolated with my job or going to do things like take out the trash or check the mail in the apartment building where I live which has dubious ventilation and where people don’t wear masks in the hallways and, again, Omicron is surging here.

And I’m just. I’m just stressed. Over COVID. Over how so much of the population no longer seems to give a crap. Over my teacher stepbrother and friends, and my cousins who are nurses and doctors. Over how my country’s political system is quietly disintegrating and the people who have the power to stop it are either active participants in the disintegration or has thrown their hands up and gone, “I dunno, I can’t stop it.” Over how the CDC makes choices that make sense from a purely biological standpoint but then keeps forgetting that any advisories they give out will be going to actual human beings who generally aren’t going to follow an effing flowchart. Over how a terrifyingly huge portion of this country actually lives in an alternate reality. Over how, if we want to stop variants from arising, EVERYONE needs to have access to vaccines and how that isn’t happening. Over how I feel so powerless against it all.

A year ago I was hopeful. I actually cried at seeing the video of the first vaccines being given out, first worldwide and then in the US. I spent an entire month of my life working 10-hour days to help vaccinate people. And now…now I feel like I’m back where I was in November 2020, when, while standing in a socially distanced line of masked people waiting to be checked out at Aldi, I had this moment of absolute despair of when we’d be able to stop doing that — how would we know when to go back to “normal”?. The moment of solidarity I’d had way back in early April of that year, when during another Aldi trip, the woman in the car next to me and I had simultaneously sanitized our hands, put on our masks, sanitized our hands again, then realized to our mutual amusement that we were both going through the same then-unfamiliar ritual, was long gone by that November moment. 

I’ve been through natural disaster before. I lived on Long Island and had to evacuate for Superstorm Sandy. I donned my first N95 mask while helping gut and rebuild a house that had flooded, a bullet which I had dodged by the skin of my teeth as there was an actual boat washed up and blocking the driveway of a house just two blocks from me. And the terror accompanied by solidarity that there was for COVID back in March 2020 reminded me of the way everyone came together for a bit in the wake of Sandy. But the shine (such as it is) of that has long since worn off. And people now say that we have to live with it, that it’s a hoax, that it’s treatable with antiparasitics that cannot and will not work for this, that the real treatments and vaccinations we have are worse than the disease, and a hundred other falsehoods, which intertwine with the falsehoods that led to January 6, 2021, and which feed this toxic brew where, again, a sizable portion of the population of the US is living in an alternate reality and dealing with a completely different set of “facts” than what’s really happening.

And I’m tired. And stressed. And I can’t fix it, can’t persuade my cousin who used to be my favorite that she should wear a face mask in her customer-facing job and that she and her husband should get vaccinated, can’t make reforms so that our government can do what needs doing to prevent a slide away from democracy, and I dunno, maybe I need a break from the news, but that won’t change reality, won’t change what’s happening, won’t change how, when I have to go into rural parts of the state for my work, I get glared at and sometimes very loudly challenged for wearing a face mask.

[ransomedrogue]

Christmas and the Gang

Repost, sort of? Written for the Blindspot Holiday project 2019 on Tumblr but I didn’t have an account back then. This is set during the two-week time jump between 2.10 and 2.11 so it sorta fits the rewatch timeline too. (I'm sure it makes no sense that Christmas would fall during that time but, then again why not?)

*

Nothing like spending Christmas with your family, Jane thought as she sat on the cold concrete floor outside of Roman's Zero Division cell. Especially when neither of you remember anything about the holidays, what it's all meant to be about.

Jane suspected that holiday celebrations hadn't been a big part of life with Shepherd - she certainly hadn't had any Christmas-related memories pop through. And Roman seemed to be just as much at a loss, though he appreciated the gifts and the take out roast turkey dinner she'd brought him.

But now that the present opening was over, they had run out of things to talk about and the terribleness of spending the holiday in a stark concrete bunker was settling in all around them. Roman seemed a bit fidgety too, like he was nervous about her presence.

"Don't you have something better to be doing on Christmas Day?" he asked, giving her a skeptical look.

Jane shook her head. She genuinely had nothing else planned for that day. The rest of the team was spending the holidays with family; everyone seemed to have relatives in town that year. She was happy that they were all getting a chance to spend time with their loved ones. They deserved it after how hard it had been recently, especially since the ambush that left so many agents dead.

Terrible waves of guilt still crashed within her whenever Jane thought about what had happened. How it had all been her fault, caught out by Sandstorm's mole. She felt so horrible for Patterson, tortured by someone she loved. And for Reade, who was still recovering from his leg injury. Weller too, even though he hadn't been there for the raid. The guilt he had felt about not being there, being played by Sandstorm. Jane knew it was all on her, that none of it would have happened had she never come up with this plan, erased her own memory.

So of course she didn't have any plans for Christmas Day - the only family she'd ever known was probably lost to her forever. And although the environment sucked, at least she had Roman to spend time with. Even if she was just drawing while he read a book, Jane liked being there, trying to connect with him. He was her only family now, all that she had.

Just then her phone chimed an alert and Jane pulled it out to see that it was her FBI locator app going off, indicating a target on the move, just outside the NYO office. There was no information from Patterson attached to the search though and they weren't actively trying to locate anyone.

"What's that?" Roman asked curiously.

"I don't know," Jane replied. "I'm being given a target to catch but we aren't working on anything right now."

"Are you going to go?" he questioned. "Shouldn't you ask Weller about it before you follow a random signal?"

He had a point, Jane thought. But it was Christmas day and Kurt was busy with family along with everyone else. Also the target was still nearby and she was the only one at the NYO. It was up to her to find out what it was about.

"I don't want to bother him if it turns out to be nothing," Jane said. "I'll go investigate first and if I need back up I'll call it in then."

"You just want something to do that isn't sitting in an underground bunker. I don't blame you, you should be out with your friends," he commented. "So go, if it turns out to be something then at least you'll see them on Christmas."

That was sad, she thought. But true. That the only chance she had of seeing the team on Christmas was if they were called in on an emergency.

"Okay, I'm going," she declared, ready to do anything other than sit around and mope. "I'll see you later Roman. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas Jane," her brother replied sincerely.

Jane left the NYO building and started following the tracker uptown. Her quarry looked to be on foot so she walked as well, far enough behind that she wouldn't get made.

It was strange following a signal that she knew nothing about. Jane tracked it for miles and miles until she was in Central Park, amidst families all celebrating Christmas.

Finally, her target had stopped moving and seemed to be staying among the many people ice skating on a large rink in front of her. Jane stared at the crowd of skaters, realizing that she had no hope of finding an unknown subject out on the ice. Especially since she wasn't sure if she knew how to skate and had no reason for even chasing this person.

She was about to give up the search, glad to have at least gotten some outdoor exercise and entertainment, when a familiar figure caught her eye. Jane turned her attention back to the ice rink and stared at the object of her interest.

It was definitely Assistant Director Kurt Weller, skating with his nephew and his sister. Even from that distance she could tell that he was laughing at Sarah, who was rather wobbly on her skates.

Jane stood there staring, thinking that it couldn't be a coincidence. The city was huge and the tracker had led her to exactly where Weller was. But it didn't make any sense. She was sure that Kurt had not set it up, would not want her at this family outing.

She felt like a creep even watching them from the edge of the rink and had just turned to leave when a familiar voice called out her name.

Jane turned back, feeling like she had been caught spying. But then again, it was Christmas. And now at least she would get to see Kurt for a minute, although the circumstances were odd.

Weller was just skidding to a stop in front of her, wearing a slightly confused smile

"Jane," he repeated, a bit out of breath from hurrying over. "Hey."

*

Kurt Weller chased his nephew around the crowded ice of the Wollman rink, thinking how he hadn't done anything like this in years. Though he still thought it was very strange that Sarah won free tickets specifically for Christmas Day, especially since she couldn't remember having entered any contests and didn't even live in New York anymore.

But something something about looking a gift horse in the mouth, and what could be sinister about a family ice skating excursion on Christmas?

He hadn't been on skates since he was a kid but he hadn't forgotten how, though it took him a few times around to get his balance again. Sawyer wasn't bad either, considering he was only ten and hadn't been ice skating very many times. But Weller had to really keep an eye out for his sister who had already almost crashed into other skaters a few times that day.

He was scanning the crowd for Sarah when he spied a familiar movement at the edge of a group of people who were watching the skaters. He couldn't consciously determine what it was that he saw but Kurt knew he had to investigate and went over to check.

Weller tried to keep his eye on his target as he skated to the edge of the rink but it was difficult amongst the holiday crowds. Still, he was able to spot her just as she was turning to leave, easily identifying the way her body moved.

"Jane!" he hollered, unsure what to make of her appearance there.

It could just be a coincidence, he thought. Maybe she was out for a walk and happened to stop and watch.

Or maybe it was the universe trying to do him a favour.

Luckily Jane must have heard him, because she turned back towards the rink and watched as he thankfully managed to skid to a stop without falling.

"Jane," he called again, slightly out of breath. "Hey."

Jane smiled, coming down to meet him at the edge of the ice.

"Hey Kurt," she said, a bit shyly. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas," he replied. "What are you doing here?"

Jane looked at him nervously and Weller wondered what she could possibly be worried about, before thinking how adorable she was with that little furrow in her brow.

Stop it, he admonished himself mentally. It was a constant battle to keep inappropriate Jane-related thoughts out of his head. Even after everything that had happened between them.

Maybe because of everything that had happened between them.

"This is going to sound weird," she started, pulling out her phone and showing him the indicator on her locator app. "But this started going off when I was with Roman and it was right outside the NYO so I followed it. And it led me here."

"You followed a lead on your own without knowing anything about it?" he exclaimed, already looking around the rink in alarm, searching for possible danger.

"Why didn't you call me?"

Jane sighed, pulling into a defensive posture.

"It's Christmas and I didn't want to disturb you if it turned out to be nothing. Which it did," she grumbled.

Dammit, he thought. He always did this, pissed her off by being overprotective.

Weller took a few deep breaths and told himself to calm down. It was Christmas, and nothing nefarious seemed to be happening at the ice rink. Plus, Jane was right there. What else could he want from life?

"Sorry," he apologized. "I just don't like the idea of you being out there on your own."

Jane's expression softened and she gave him a small shrug.

"Good thing it led me to you then," she said, her green eyes flickering playfully.

Every day he loved her more. He could admit that to himself now.

"We should find out if you know how to skate," he said, the line coming to him out of nowhere. "Someday it might be required for tactical purposes."

Jane flashed a sly grin and he knew he'd already won.

"Well, when you put it that way, it does seem pretty important to find out," she replied mock seriously.

Weller grinned, unsure what to make of of his good luck. But for once he wasn't going to let his worries get in the way.

"Let's get you some skates," he said.

They rented some skates for Jane and immediately Kurt knew he was in trouble. She laced them up like a pro and walked over to the ice confidently, then stepped onto the rink and started skating away from him faster than he could manage.

Goddammit, he thought. She was good at everything.

It was nice to have a goal though, someone to chase. Kurt dodged other skaters, keeping his eyes on Jane whipping about. But, try as he might, he couldn't catch up to her until she mercifully stopped.

"That was fun!" she gasped, her cheeks ridiculously pink.

"I guess ice skating is part of Navy SEAL training now," he commented, impressed by her as always.

Jane grinned and shrugged.

"Maybe I had to go undercover as a Canadian," she conjectured. "Part of the essential skill set."

Weller laughed at the impish look on her face; she looked more relaxed than he'd seen her in awhile. Things had been so dire for Jane ever since she escaped from the black site, her life constantly in danger. At least now she was done with being a double agent. He slept so much better knowing she wasn't out there alone with a bunch of terrorists.

He would sleep even better if she were close enough to personally observe.

Kurt shook the thought out of his head but couldn't stop himself from offering her his hand, feeling as nervous as a schoolboy. And his heart thumped in his chest when she snaked her fingers between his, grasping his hand tightly.

"So, you think you're qualified to catch a perp on skates?" Jane asked with a twinkle in her eye.

Not if that perp is you, for the crime of stealing my heart.

Thankfully Weller managed to keep his corny line to himself, again trying to shake the thought out of his head.

"I think I'll leave that one up to the undercover Canadians," he said instead.

They made their way around the rink a few more times, Jane tugging him along. Kurt was just looking around for his sister and his nephew when a teenage girl started skating right beside them.

"Kurt Weller?" the girl said. "This is for you."

She produced a plain white envelope and he took it without thinking, so bewildered by the situation that he didn't even notice the delivery girl skate away.

They slid to a stop and Weller looked at Jane in surprise. He could see that she was also confused, looking at the envelope with suspicion.

Unless it was some sort of chemical or biological agent, there wasn't much that could fit in the envelope in his hand. Really, it did not appear dangerous so Weller threw all caution to the wind and just opened it.

Inside was a pair of tickets to the rare Christmas Day NFL game that afternoon, the seats were even quite good. Kurt glanced around again, baffled, but the courier was long gone by then. All he saw was Jane, standing in front of him, a frosty rosy delight, biting her lower lip in anticipation.

He should have been suspicious, ready for some elaborate set up. But it was Christmas, and he had Jane right there, along with two tickets to the game in his hand.

It was a good thing his nephew and sister had other plans for the afternoon and wouldn't be into a NFL game anyhow.

"Bet you've never been to a football game," Weller said with a grin. "Beer and hot dogs are on me. But we can't tell Zapata and Reade about these tickets, they would give us so much crap about not being real football fans."

*

Tasha Zapata was not a holiday person - she just couldn't be bothered with all the lights and tinsel that had to come back down afterwards. And family gatherings generally led to too many insinuations about boyfriends and babies and the life she'd chosen.

Though she could get down with the whole drinking aspect of the season; in fact, saw alcohol as her only chance at surviving the ordeal.

Case in point, she was already a few drinks in and it was only early afternoon. She had started with a bloody Mary at breakfast, a little hair of the dog to chase away the remnants of the previous night. And then of course there was a celebratory mimosa, followed by another glass of champagne.

Tasha sighed, felt the need to both slow things down and speed it all up. She was not usually that hard a drinker, at least not anymore. It had been bad at one point, after her partner had died on the job while she was with the NYPD. But then alcohol had started to take a toll on her job performance and she had just managed to shut it down before it got in the way of her future. But really she'd only replaced one bad habit with another, more expensive one.

Since then she only drank socially and not usually to excess. But things had been stressful as fuck at work pretty much ever since Jane showed up just over six months ago. First with Carter blackmailing her then with Weitz doing the same shit. She was done with shady powerful men screwing with her life. She wanted the ability to take them all down.

The tattoos were such a mind fuck because of that. They pointed at corruption and created action, which Zapata loved. But Jane had been planted by terrorists, hell Jane was a terrorist before she wiped her own memory. It was still hard for Tasha not to think of Jane as anything but the Trojan horse she was meant to be. Especially with Weller being so insanely sure that Jane was on their side, unwilling to even consider the idea that she could be stringing them along.

But then again, when had Weller ever been objective about Jane? Even when she had just escaped the CIA and come back, he hadn't been able to shoot her, despite Jane trying to goad him into doing it. Tasha had stepped up with no qualms at all. In fact, she'd been more worried about stopping at one shot than she had been about shooting their former teammate.

Then ever since, Weller had trusted Jane. He'd been consistently worried for her, not about her. Even when he'd been angry as hell and said he didn't want Jane around. He'd obviously been disproportionately concerned about her and his support for her had never wavered.

It was hard for Tasha to wrap her head around, especially since what happened at the Sandstorm compound - the explosion that had caused so many deaths. She wanted to blame Jane, because she had led them there. And because she had started this all by lying to them in the first place. But Zapata knew deep down that Jane was with them, that she had been from the start. Sure, she had made mistakes but Tasha had fucked up too, by selling her teammate out to the CIA. She still felt guilty about that, and about sleazy fucking Matthew Weitz.

The truth was, Zapata just wanted to have someone to pin the blame on, someone that wasn't herself. Jane had gotten played, outed by her own plan, and her own recruit. But she had almost died too and was doing her best to fix the mistakes of her past. So it was hard to be too mad at her.

After all, none of them had suspected Borden of being a mole, so that was on them. Tasha shuddered, thought about how she had encouraged Patterson to go out with him. And now Patterson had been horribly hurt both physically and mentally, clearly still trying to repress all the trauma she had gone through. Zapata had even tried to convince her to spend Christmas together, because she knew her friend would spend the day working from home and hiding from the world. But of course Patterson had declined the invite, mumbling some excuse about having to skype with her parents.

Zapata sighed. She hated being half-cut and maudlin, just wanted to call Reade up and bitch to him about all the crap in their lives. But of course even that relationship had gone to shit since he had unexpectedly come on to her.

Now that was a topic she wasn't meant to think about. She had been so shocked in the moment, unsure how to respond. Her first thought had been 'this is a terrible idea'. Her second thought, 'but possibly terrible in a very good way'.

Of course she had run away instead of confronting it, cutting it off quickly and hopefully permanently so she wouldn't ever have to make that choice again. Because the thought of having a relationship with Reade made Zapata extremely nervous in a way she didn't want to explore.

Tasha shook her head, annoyed with herself. She was moping by herself on the couch while the rest of the family was in the kitchen helping prepare dinner. But the thought of joining in with them wasn't appealing either, it would just lead to more drinking and behaviour that she'd end up regretting.

Thankfully there was a knock on the door just at that moment and no one else could hear it due to the din in the kitchen. Zapata figured that any distraction was better than nothing, wondering who could be at the door on Christmas Day when everyone invited was already there.

She answered the door and it was a courier, with an envelope generically addressed to Female FBI Agent. Which made no sense at all, receiving mail not in her name, especially since she was at her grandma's house. But the courier didn't know anything about the package, just saying it was for a female FBI agent at that address before handing it to her and leaving.

Tasha did a visual inspection of the envelope, and then probed it with her fingers. It seemed like nothing except paper was inside. Which didn't mean there wasn't any risk but Zapata was drunk and curious, so she slit it open anyways.

Inside were two lower tier tickets to the NY Giants game that afternoon, great seats that she could never afford for herself. Zapata ran into the kitchen and interrogated her family until she was satisfied that none of them had any idea about where the envelope had come from. When it was clear that the tickets were a gift from an unknown deity, Tasha shrugged and decided it did not matter who had sent them, even if it was some sort of trap.

She was going to the football game! And of course she knew what she needed to do next. No matter how awkward things would be. If she went to the game without taking Reade, he would hold it against her for life. And really there was no one else she wanted to go with, even with the weirdness between them.

Zapata pulled out her phone, already dialing his number.

*

It had been a pretty shit year, Edgar Reade concluded as he watched his relatives argue about politics and the state of the government. Sometimes they seemed to forget he worked for the FBI, and that the whole distrust of authority thing pissed him off.

Though he had to admit he was seeing things in a different light since they had started investigating the tattoo cases. As screwed up as it was to be lead by terrorists into an anti-corruption effort, it had highlighted a lot of the problems in the system.

Then again the same terrorists had just tried to kill him, his leg still not quite a hundred percent after nearly two weeks of recovery. Though he was determined to go back to work after Christmas; he'd had enough of sitting around and thinking about all the things that had gone wrong in his life recently.

The whole Coach Jones situation. Freddy. That tape he hadn't watched yet. All this was hanging over his head, tinting every thought.

That and the other thing.

Zapata.

Damn. In some ways that was worse to think about than the possible childhood abuse he'd suffered. He hadn't talked to her since he'd made a move on her, mistaking her sympathy for something else.

Reade told himself it was the drugs, or emotional residue from almost dying in that explosion. That he didn't want to make out with his best friend, that he hadn't always wondered what it would be like if they fucked.

It was Tasha. His partner, his wingman. She was off limits and he'd screwed it up.

She would forgive him of course. But it was going to be awkward between them for awhile. Zapata was not going to want to talk about it, her disdain of any discussions involving feelings well documented. And she was going to bug him about it forever.

Reade sighed to himself, wishing he was anywhere else so that he could at least stop lying about how he injured his leg, escape from feeling so disconnected from his family.

Of course he really just wanted to be with Tasha, despite all the ribbing he would take from her. He couldn't stop thinking about waking up to her holding his hand, that worried expression on her face. It still made him feel less sorry for himself, even if he had messed it up afterwards.

Reade had just decided to have another drink in an attempt to knock all thoughts of Tasha Zapata of his head when his phone rang, and of course, it was Zapata.

"You have an hour to get to Metlife stadium, I have tickets to the game. Don't ask questions, don't tell me you can't ditch your cousins," she stated firmly. "I'll see you there."

Well, that was unexpected and slightly bewildering, he thought to himself. And yet, Zapata had said she had tickets to the game so it was a pretty big risk to ask questions, or challenge her conditions.

Reade pushed himself to his feet, making the rounds and effectively ditching his relatives with excuses of an urgent work matter. It was only half a lie, he figured. Tasha was from work and free tickets to an NFL game could certainly be construed as an urgent situation.

With that settled, he got an uber, wondering what the hell was going on. Zapata had sounded serious but possibly drunk. Which could go all kinds of sideways considering their recent history.

Damn, he hated overthinking things with Tasha. They had always been such good friends. He would just play it cool, act like nothing had happened unless she brought it up.

Reade got out of the car at the stadium, looked around and spotted Zapata right away. She saw him too and came walking over, waving the two tickets in her hand.

"Look at these seats!" she crowed, holding the tickets right up to his face. "I've never sat this close before."

"Where did these tickets come from?" Reade asked, his suspicions immediately aroused. There's no way Zapata got them from family, not at the price of NFL games those days. And she was obviously already way past tipsy, had that looseness to her body language.

"Courier showed up at my grandma's place, had an envelope for me," Tasha admitted. "All that was in it was the tickets."

"What?" Reade asked. "That's nuts, Tasha. Wait. This envelope just says Female FBI Agent, it's not even addressed to your name. And how did a courier know to go to your grandma's house with something for you? I can't believe you opened it, there could have been anthrax in there or something."

"You think I didn't think of that?" Zapata replied hotly. "But it felt like just paper, no powder or anything. And I was pretty drunk so I just went for it."

"Oh you're pretty drunk are you?" he teased. "I couldn't tell."

"Screw you, Reade," she replied easily. "So we going to this game or not?"

Damn, well obviously they were going to end up at the game, he realized. No matter how strange the circumstances of the tickets were. They were there and they had amazing seats.

"Well, it's really weird," he declared. "I think we should do our due diligence and check it out, make sure it's nothing."

Tasha grinned at him winningly and they headed into the stadium, searching for their seats. It was almost game time so they hurried, as fast as his healing leg could manage. Of course Zapata still managed to stop for drinks too, clearly getting ready for a rowdy time.

When they got nearer to their seats Reade started to feel a sense of something odd. He couldn't quite put his finger on it until he looked down the row at the only empty seats left and saw a strip of tattooed skin.

As he and Zapata made their way down to their seats, Weller and Jane stood up too, looking as confused as he was.

"What the hell are you guys doing here?" Tasha exclaimed loudly.

Weller shrugged, also looking suspicious but not overly worried. Which was unusual in itself.

"We were skating in Central Park when a teenager approached me with an envelope and then took off," he explained. "These tickets were in the envelope. What about you?"

"So weird, basically the same shit. Courier came to my grandma's place with an envelope for me," Tasha replied. "No way to trace it so I thought I better go to the game and rescue Reade from being a sad sack on Christmas."

Damn, she was pretty drunk already, Reade thought yet again.

"Wait, you guys were skating?" Zapata asked, switching tracks.

Both Weller and Jane started blushing, looking away shyly though it wasn't exactly a surprise to anyone. Even after she had been exposed as a liar, Weller still looked at her the same desperate way. The way that said I think about you all the time even though I know I shouldn't.

"Yeah well the locator tracker on my phone just started going off, and I followed it to the rink," Jane explained hastily. "And Weller was there with his sister and nephew but he made me go skating. For tactical purposes."

It was clearly an inside joke of some kind because Kurt grinned idiotically at her, the way he does when he thinks no one is looking.

"There's been a lot of strange things going on today," Reade concluded, looking at his teammates. "All of which to set us up to be here. Should we not be worried?"

He didn't want to be the guy who put a damper on things but they were fighting a terrorist organization with a huge reach. What if they were targeting the game and trying to take the team down with the rest of the stadium?

"Oh lighten up Eddie," Zapata said, stressing the nickname she liked to annoy him with. "It's Christmas and it's football. Look at these seats! And even Weller is drinking beer. So relax and take this."

She passed him a beer and he didn't have much choice but to let go of his misgivings, sit back and drink his beverage, enjoy the game and the fact that Tasha was too drunk to care about the current state of their relationship. After all, she was right. Even Weller seemed loose, was explaining the rules of football to Jane, leaning in closer than necessary even with the loudness of the crowd.

The game was a close one, with the Giants scoring first but the visiting Steelers coming right back to tie it. It went back and forth all game right up to the start of the fourth quarter, which started with the Giants up by three.

Tasha was trying to get a rise out of Weller by dissing the Pennsylvania-based football team with Jane looking on in amusement when the game went to commercial break on television and the in-arena entertainment started flashing on the jumbotron.

Reade looked up and saw that it was the Kiss Cam, groaned inwardly feeling like the universe was poking fun at his mistake. The camera flashed to a few different couples who all seemed happy to satisfy the crowd's desire to see smooching.

And then he saw a familiar hair flip on the screen, a toss of long brown strands that he would recognize anywhere.

"You're on the screen, Tasha!" he shouted, even though she was sitting right next to him.

Now he could see Weller too, and the cameraman was flashing between showing just Weller and Zapata on the screen to just Weller and Jane. It was clear what the question was, the only thing Reade was unsure about was whether Kurt had drunk enough beer to answer it.

What he had never anticipated was that Jane had drunk enough beer and had such epically low alcohol tolerance that she was the one to step up and answer the question for the cameraman. She leaned over and kissed Weller, tentatively for about a nanosecond before they were both all in, unstoppable.

Zapata grinned like a maniac watching, turned to Reade and winked.

"You think I should have gone for it before Jane jumped him?" she asked.

Reade laughed and looked back at the jumbotron just then, saw, to his dismay, that the kiss cam had only just moved over two seats and was firmly focused on Tasha and him.

Shit, he thought. Like a fucking nightmare come to life.

Or like a dream.

Because Zapata was now wasted, like probably not going to remember the second half of the game wasted. And so she reached up to pull him towards her, then was kissing him before he even realized what the hell was going on.

It took him half a moment to decide that he had better just go with it. To try and control Tasha at that point would have been pointless. And even if she did remember, there was no doubt who made the move this time.

Reade pulled her to him, the kiss lasting longer than he expected. It felt so good to be connected with Tasha at that level, so illicit too. He didn't want it to end, kept reaching for her lips even as she drunkenly pulled away, flashed him a self-satisfied look.

"I didn't do that," she slurred at him seriously.

Reade was still stunned, Weller and Jane too by all appearances. They all stared at Tasha in amazement, barely noticed as the jumbotron announced that they were all winners in the contest, that a team representative would be by shortly to give them their prizes.

When the prize arrived it was again just a plain envelope, with what appeared to be cardboard inside. No one even questioned the safety of the situation this time around and Reade opened the envelope to reveal five tickets to the Rockettes show at Radio City Music Hall that night.

Jane voiced what they must all have been thinking.

"That doesn't make any sense. There are four of us why would they give us five tickets?"

But of course none of it made any sense at all. From the tracker that had sent Jane to the ice rink, to the envelopes with the football tickets in them. The Broadway tickets were just another oddity along the way. And it was obvious to all of them who the fifth ticket was meant for.

So they all hopped into a cab, ready to spread their weird Christmas luck.

*

Patterson had reverted to an old coping mechanism. Whenever her feelings had overwhelmed her as a child, she had hidden away in her closet by herself. For whatever reason it had helped her feel like her emotions were contained within that space - that they couldn't follow her out into the world and upset her there.

Not that she was hiding in a closet. But her apartment was her closet now, or her lab at work. A place where she could hide away from the world and pretend it didn't exist. Trick herself into believing that none of the horrible things that had happened to her that year could hurt her.

She had lied to her family, telling them she had to work on Christmas so she couldn't make her usual visit home. There was no way she could have dealt with seeing her parents. She would have fallen apart with them, and they would have gotten it out of her somehow. The whole terrible ordeal, at least everything that wasn't classified. And there's no way Patterson could have dealt with that. She wasn't ready to tell her story, wasn't sure she ever would be.

So she had hidden away with junk food and her pain. Tasha had asked her if she wanted to spend Christmas with her but Patterson had declined her friend's well-intentioned invite. Like everyone else, Zapata just wanted to help. But Patterson wasn't the kind of person that accepted help easily, or at all.

She was already far into the second Lord of the Rings movie, the extended cut of course, when there was a knock at her door. Patterson considered who it could be at dinnertime on Christmas Day, then stopped to grab her service weapon on her way to the door.

Patterson opened it a crack and was not particularly surprised to find Tasha Zapata there, reeking of alcohol and hollering somewhat incoherently. She was, however, quite shocked to find Reade, Weller, and Jane on her doorstep as well, all of them also exhibiting various levels of inebriation.

They all yelled Merry Christmas at her together, a bit out of sync but overall it was still pretty adorable. Even when she was at her worst, at least her friends could make her smile. Especially when Zapata was rambling about the Giants game, the kiss cam, tickets to the Rockettes show and everyone else looked somewhere between self-satisfied and embarrassed.

"Wait, did you just say Jane and Weller won the kiss cam contest?" Patterson exclaimed, all her troubles put aside for the moment.

Jane blushed like crazy, then shook her head in desperate denial.

"No," she replied. "There's no way we would have won without Tasha and Reade jumping in on the action."

"What!" Patterson yelped. "I would have sat through football to see that."

"I was drunk!" Tasha shouted, as if it wasn't obvious. "And Jane's right, I totally won us these Rockettes tickets. So let's go. Our cab is waiting for you, Patterson."

Leaving her apartment and going to a cheesy Christmas Broadway show was the last thing that Patterson wanted to do. But she didn't want to argue with her team, especially with a wasted Zapata. And she had to admit it was kind of nice to see them all together on the holiday.

So Patterson quickly got ready to go out and they pulled up to the show just in time to get to their seats before it started. Just like the football tickets, their seats were great, the dancers right there in front of them.

The show was better than Patterson expected and she found herself getting into the magical dance scenes, especially because Jane was sitting beside her, as wide-eyed as a child watching the spectacle. Patterson thought about how nice it was to see everyone so comfortable with Jane again, that they were together for Christmas after such a brutal year for all of them.

Maybe it wasn't so bad that she wasn't able to complete the Lord of the Rings trilogy by herself, that these mysterious things had been happening to the team all day. Even though she felt like she should be more suspicious of everything and the oddness of it all. The rest of them seemed to have thrown all logic out the door, probably due to the holiday drinking. But Patterson was still on the lookout for some sort of trap, anything strange.

It finally happened near the end of the show, during the big finale. Patterson saw a man sneak onto the stage, pulling out a gun. Then another man stood up in the middle of the crowd and fired a shot into the air.

Both men started running after that and the team mobilized quickly despite the amount of alcohol still affecting them. They all pulled out their weapons and split up to chase the two different gunmen. Jane and Weller followed the guy from the stage while Patterson, Zapata and Reade chased the man in the crowd.

Patterson ran ahead, glad that at least someone was sober amongst the five of them. The man they were chasing made for the emergency stairs, then started heading up towards the roof. Patterson followed close behind, her gun drawn and ready for action.

When they finally got up to the roof, the man they were after was nowhere to be seen. Patterson, Zapata and Reade looked at each other, befuddled. There was no way he could have escaped them.

Just then, another door to the roof opened and Jane and Weller appeared out of it, looking just as confused as Patterson felt.

"What the hell?" Weller yelled. "I saw our target come up here, he would have run right into you guys. Where is he?"

"Same thing happened to us," Patterson replied. "We got on the roof and our guy had just disappeared."

She tried to say something more but found herself being drowned out by the sound of an incoming helicopter. Patterson looked up to see what looked like an FBI chopper about to land on the same roof they were on. The team all pulled back to a safe distance and stared at each other, clearly all baffled by the situation.

When the helicopter finally landed, an FBI agent jumped out and called out their names, said there was an urgent situation that their presence was needed for. Weller questioned the agent and seemed to be satisfied with the answers he got because he waved them into the chopper, told them all it seemed legit.

Except for the part where no one at the FBI could have known that they would be at the Rockettes show, much less on the roof at that exact moment. Unless Weller had called it in, but even so, that seemed like a huge stretch.

Patterson exhaled worriedly, wondered what they were getting themselves into. Her teammates were still somewhat drunk and they weren't properly armed or dressed for a mission. Yet she wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else at the moment, certainly not at home alone while her friends were together on a sketchy Christmas field op. Despite the large possibility that they were walking straight into an elaborate trap.

*

As her beer buzz started to fade and the situation became less shrouded with alcohol, worry began to creep up Jane's neck. Even though Weller had checked the agent's ID and authorization, none of it made any sense at all. How could a helicopter have known that they would be chasing disappearing suspects on the roof of Radio City Music Hall?

But at least she was the team. Christmas had already been better than expected, even if it did end up with them abducted. Jane flushed at the memory of skating with Weller, his hand warm in hers. Then reaching up to kiss him in front of an entire stadium full of people. She still couldn't believe she had done that. Well, yes she could. She had been quite drunk and it's not like she didn't still think about how perfect it had felt, the first time she found a moment just for them. Right before her life got exponentially complicated.

The helicopter began to descend in a densely wooded area, presumably in upstate New York based on the direction and time traveled. When it landed, there was nothing nearby except a cabin, all lit up with Christmas lights on the outside.

They all got out of the chopper and it flew away without giving them any more information on why they were there. The pilot had claimed to know nothing except that where he was meant to drop them off, and that further instructions would be given once they arrived.

Everyone drew their weapons and they split up into groups to do a perimeter check of the building before entering. Jane and Weller went around back, seeing that the cabin had a nice deck and a fire pit, with a bonfire already going, and more wood piled nearby. They approached the back door and the windows that looked out onto the deck. It didn't appear that anyone was inside, but it was lit and prepped for festivities.

Jane reached for the doorknob, and wasn't all that surprised to find it unlocked. The day had been extremely strange already - she was no longer shocked by anything.

When she opened the door and walked into the cabin Jane was assaulted by multiple aromas all at once. The scents of roasted turkey and pine trees and spiced cider tickled her nose as she looked around to see a full Christmas dinner laid out on the table, along with copious amounts of alcohol, and mistletoe. A lot of mistletoe.

Jane looked at Weller, and saw that he appeared to be as confused as she was. Just then the rest of the team entered the cabin through the front door and they all stood around staring at the table full of food, as well as the absurd amount of decorations.

"What's that?" Patterson asked, pointing at a package in the middle of the table.

It was a slim gift-wrapped item, arranged as the centrepiece with a placard that said "The Gang". Weller grabbed it and tore off the paper.

"It's a tablet," he stated, handing it to Patterson.

Patterson took the device and looked it over, powered it up.

"It's only got one video on it," she reported.

"Well play it," Zapata urged. "So we can start drinking again."

Patterson pressed play on the video and a familiar face appeared on the screen, followed by his equally familiar, grating voice. Weller groaned as soon as he heard who it was and Jane sighed as well, shaking her head in exasperation.

"Merry Christmas my FBI friends! Or Happy Hannukah, if you prefer, though I think that was done days ago and none of you present as Jewish. Anyways, happy holidays from your friendly neighbourhood felon, I hope you've all had a better day than I've had. Which isn't exactly hard considering I'm enjoying the fine amenities of the federal penitentiary system. Not that I'm complaining, but there isn't a lot of opportunity to go ice skating or to a football game or to a Broadway musical. Or even just to have Christmas dinner with your family."

Patterson pressed pause and they all looked at each other, stunned.

"Rich did this? How?" Weller grunted irritably. "He's in prison. And why would he do this?"

"I bet he tells us," Reade commented dryly. "Let's hear what else he's got to say."

Patterson pressed play again and the video of Rich continued.

"So I bet you guys are wondering how I did this all from my cold lonely prison cell. But what you should be asking is why I did this all from my cold lonely prison cell. Because the thing is, criminals, they really can be such gossips. And word on the street was my favourite FBI team just took some hits so I thought to myself, Rich, it is your duty to give your good friends at the bureau a Christmas together. So I did this for you. Well, really, I did it for Stubbles and Jane but they're such suckers for the rest of you that I couldn't leave anyone out. Well, except for that scary NSA lady, I definitely left her out. That was for you, Jane."

Rich paused and winked at that point, leaving time for everyone to stare at Jane and Weller who were both blushing, trying not to look at each other. Jane shook her head and bit down hard on her lower lip trying to tame the pitter patter that her heart made at Rich's words.

"So that's it. I did this all so you guys would spend Christmas together, like a family should. Well, that and you know, there's the whole I scratch your ass, you scratch mine kind of thing. I figure a favour owed by my FBI compadres is always a plus. Also, on an unrelated note, did you know I get conjugal visits? Jane, Weller, that's for your info. Although I think it's a one at a time thing in here, the federal prison system isn't in on threesome cultures yet, they're not very progressive that way."

Jane looked at Kurt, could see his jaw grinding as he glared at the image of Rich. She had to grin though, as much as Rich annoyed the crap out of her too, at least he was consistent. And he had done a very thoughtful expensive thing for them, somehow giving them all a great day at a difficult time.

"Anyways, that's all I wanted to say from my sad cold corner of the inmate world. Please think of me while you enjoy the luxuries of the outside. And the next time we meet, remember I could have had you all killed instead of sending you on a romantic adventure."

With that the screen went dark and Christmas music came on to replace Rich's voice. For a moment they all just looked at each other trying to process what had happened. But then Tasha grabbed a bottle of wine off the table and started pouring herself a glass, so Weller shrugged and popped open beer for himself too. After that they took down the dinner in record time, Jane eating more than she ever had in a single sitting and then getting laughed at by the rest of the group by moaning about how much she regretted her second plateful.

"Oh my god, she doesn't know about wearing pants with elastic waistbands for holidays," Zapata exclaimed. "Or about saving room for dessert."

Jane joined in the laughter because she genuinely didn't know about either of those things; had never considered eating so much that her pants would feel uncomfortable. Or that there could be another whole course after the huge amount of food they'd already eaten. Usually when she was reminded of her lifetime of missing memories Jane would feel empty and disconnected. But this time she suspected she had never had a Christmas as full of happiness before - that the previous holidays of her life had not been full of turkey and pumpkin pie.

After dinner, Jane felt the need to move around a bit so she walked out back for some fresh air and added some wood to the fire that had died down while they were eating. Once the bonfire was going again she stood by it absorbing the warmth and watching the flickering flames.

She heard the patio door open and looked up to see Weller walking towards her. Rich's innuendo came back to her in the moment and she almost blushed again. Despite the fairy tale day, and the ridiculous kiss cam situation, Jane knew that Kurt wasn't hers, would likely never be. His trust in her was still fragile, he had barely just started treating her as a friend again. And he was sleeping with Nas, pretty clearly not looking to start a relationship with a former terrorist.

Weller came to stand next to her at the fire, huddling up close to her and looking up at the sky.

"It's starting to snow," he commented, a lazy smile on his face.

She loved seeing him like that, so at ease with everything. She knew things had been hard for him lately, that he was troubled by Shepherd's role in his life. It had to have been terrible to find out you'd been watched from afar, every since you were a kid. And despite the merry atmosphere and alcohol, she felt bad about having planned it all with Shepherd, no matter what she was doing to counter it now.

"Yeah, it's so pretty," she replied.

Jane looked up at Weller, wondered if he had come out to talk to her for a reason. She wished things could be easy between them again, that she could heal all the hurt wrought by her lies. But she had broken a fundamental trust between them and she didn't know if Kurt could ever truly forgive her for everything she had done, everything she kept from him.

She was still searching for something to say when Weller turned to look at her, wearing a slightly anxious expression. Jane braced herself for some sort of disappointment, though she couldn't imagine what she was so afraid of. Kurt had been so kind to her all day, so she supposed she was just worried because the fairy tale had to end some time.

"So, um, Jane," Weller started, glancing at her nervously. "I know we didn't talk about this, and I don't want to put you on the spot."

Now she was really confused, her shoulders starting to tense up with fear about whatever bomb he's about to drop on Christmas, of all days.

"What are you talking about Kurt?" she managed to squeak out, her heart rate ramping up with anticipation.

Weller sighed, pulling something out of his pocket.

"I got you something for Christmas. I know, I shouldn't have, so there's no reason to feel bad that you didn't get me anything. But I saw it and it made me think of you. It was an impulse thing and it was probably a mistake. And then I brought it skating because I wanted to figure how to give it to you without it being weird and so I had it here with me..."

"Kurt, you're rambling," Jane interrupted, taking the small box from his hand, feeling her heart flutter.

Weller had given her something in a similar box before and the moment caught in her chest, stopped her in her tracks. But she could tell that this was something different, that it was something for her, not Taylor.

Jane opened the box to reveal a vibrant green gemstone, cut sharp and shaped like a miniature dagger. She pulled the pendent out to admire it closely, run her fingers admiringly over the sharp edges.

"Kurt, it's gorgeous," she said. "But I can't accept this."

Kurt silently reached out to take the necklace from her and put it around her neck.

"Yes it is," he agreed. "And yes you can."

"It's the colour of your eyes," he murmured in her ear. "And its beautiful, but deadly. Just like you."

Maybe Christmas really was a magical season. Or maybe she was just delusional.

But either way, Weller was saying absurd things to her and Jane was going to run with it.

"I love it," she replied, unable to form any more coherent words. "Thank you, Kurt. I'm sorry I didn't get you anything."

Weller shook his head, smiled at her winningly.

"This day together, being here right now to give it to you. That's everything I could have wanted," he replied.

Honestly it's everything she could have wanted too. This day with her team, the people she considered to be her family. And time with Kurt, without the endless stress of their regular lives.

Still Jane wished she had gotten something for him, just had never thought that he would buy her a Christmas present. Especially something that was so thoughtful, and, by all appearances, expensive too. She had thought about whether she was meant to buy something for Kurt but wouldn't have been able to get him anything much, considering her meagre asset stipend. Still, she could have drawn him something, or tried her hand at baking something chocolatey. Now though, it was obviously too late to remedy the situation.

Or was it?

For an instant Jane's mind turned to the gaudy Christmas decorations in the cabin, then to her own favourite memory of the day.

She looked at Weller wistfully, glad he couldn't read what was going on in her mind. They were friends again and that was already more than she expected. And he wasn't hers, no matter how much she wanted him.

But that moment of letting it all go, reaching up for his lips in front of a roaring stadium. It kept coming back to her, taunting her.

'What would Rich do?'

The question flashed through her mind, seemingly out of nowhere. And there was clearly only one answer.

"This is everything that I want," she replied as she reached her arms up around Kurt's neck, pulling him towards her until their lips met.

Again, the kiss was soft and shy to start but Weller's initial surprised hesitation only lasted a split second before his hands came up to her face, and his mouth started exploring hers hungrily.

Jane had never felt more connected, passionate, content. Being wrapped up in Kurt, the heat of his body warming her in intense unfamiliar ways. She tugged him to her fiercely and ran her fingers down the back of his neck, trying to permanently record the moment in her memory.

She was just thinking she could just stand there and make out with Kurt forever when the patio door opened again and she heard Zapata's voice hollering a half-joking warning about no more kissing.

Weller pulled away at the interruption, then looked at her with dazed eyes.

Jane grinned, her tongue poking out the corner of her mouth playfully at him.

"Merry Christmas, Kurt," she whispered.

Weller broke into a huge smile, slinging his arm around her shoulders.

"This whole day was a dream right?" he replied. "I'm pretending none of this ever happened."

Jane knew what he meant, and felt the same way herself as the rest of the team came up to join them around the fire. It was Christmas and she was with her family, wrapped up in Kurt Weller's arms, with him insisting that she's too thin and needed to be kept warm.

So, of course, Jane chose to not tell him that it was already the warmest she had felt in ages - that she couldn't possibly dream up a better Christmas. Instead she just snuggled into Kurt, mentally thanking their felonious frenemy for the most absurdly wonderful day of her life.

[essential4you]

BEST FITNESS GIFT GUIDE EVER! FITNESS + LIFESTYLE GIFT IDEAS FOR HIM OR HER 2019

BEST FITNESS GIFT GUIDE EVER! FITNESS + LIFESTYLE GIFT IDEAS FOR HIM OR HER 2019

Today I am walking you through the perfect fitness gifts for Christmas, I have a variety of gifts for anyone for any price point. Make sure to comment down below any other gifts that I did not mention. I hope this helped you! Items Mentioned: Water Bottle: Shaker Cup: Big Towel: Treats: Seasoning: Resistance Bands: Lift Conquer: Foam Roller: Massage Stick: String Gym Bag: Basic Gym Bag: Women’s…