#FUCK IT WE JORN.

[welcome-to-oslov]

So the only challenge I see moving forward is: how the fuck does Bror not kill Magistrate Linden with his bare hands after he beats Tilrey, consequences be damned ?!?!?!?!?!?! Like, even other Councillors weren't thrilled about that apparently (not necessarily from caring anything about Tilrey just how out of control it made Linden look), but Bror! Even if he & Bror stayed just friends omfg. Not only does he know it's just wrong, he also knows how sweet & sad & vulnerable Tilrey is and that it's the last thing he deserves 😭🤬 We know Bror finds out about it since he stays with Tilrey "after the worst nights with Linden, a steady comfort, touching only if asked" 😢 And he has a history of being angry/disturbed (about how Malsha bragged about his discomfort, about Spring Fling) and taking action to help Tilrey (planting rumors to get Verán influenced to free Tilrey from being locked in the bedroom, storming into Gersha's office later).

So Oslov-perfect that ironically it's that slimy Saldegren who ultimately has the influence to save Tilrey, not Bror the guy who has just pure care for him 😢, but I can't imagine what it takes for Bror to stop short of literal murder when it comes to Linden 😭😡🤬😡😭

Luckily moving in with Linden seems to be at least a year away! 😢 (He's at about 6-7 months now into his 3 years with The Island Party, since Bror just mentioned they met 2.5yrs ago during his 2yrs with Malsha, and he doesn't move in with Linden till the last 13 months of those 3 years... though who knows maybe he still has to set foot into Linden & Jorning's lair again before actually moving in 😔)

Oh boy, you make a good point! I was thinking at first that Tilrey could hide it from Bror, but nope, there’s that passage where he’s seeking comfort from Bror, who clearly knows everything.

So yeah, how can Bror endure that? Internalized oppression might be one factor. Maybe he works behind the scenes again; maybe he’s the one who plants the idea in Saldegren’s head! But he doesn’t directly confront anyone. He doesn’t risk his own safety or freedom to help Tilrey. Maybe it’s just a lifetime of doing what Upstarts tell him to do and only disobeying when they aren’t looking. He can manipulate them, but actually fighting them seems impossible.

One thing I’m sure of now: seeing what happens to Tilrey is what eventually turns Bror into a rebel. Sure, Mirella is also involved, but Tilrey is the real reason he joins the True Hearth. Because he didn’t help enough and he desperately wants to make up for that—and to prevent anyone else from being hurt like Tilrey. 😢

[hils79]

Hils Watches My School President - Ep 12 (Part 1)

Can't believe we're at the end already. Please don't expect me to be normal about Tiw and Por because I won't be.

I love how they set her up to be the villain of the story but actually she just wants her son to be happy.

And I love that Tinn's parents actually have a really healthy relationship (I mean apart from the time they told Tinn about all the sex they were going to have while he was away studying)

Got to get in one last printer product placement before the end

Tinn is so smooth for someone who is such a nerd (affectionate)

He is 100% correct and should say it

Of course we have to have a dramatic being outed plot to finish things off

My sweet son Por was literally the only member of the band who hadn't figured out Tinn and Gun were together. I love him.

Haha! Phat knew about Tinn and Gun but did not know about Win and Sound. Everyone's worlds getting shook today

Por is really going to be shook when he finds out that Tinn was helping because he likes Gun, and Tiw was helping because he likes Por

I thought Jorn was going to be homophobic but actually he's just mad that music club was getting preferential treatment because Tinn liked Gun. And, you know, he kind of has a point.

Character development

I love that we've now reversed roles and Gun is trying to protect Tinn, even though Tinn very much does not want to be protected

Am I just old or is this a drama thing? So many BL dramas seem to have girls taking photos of boys and posting about how they ship them on social media. It's kind of creepy.

Baby just found out what the name order in a ship means. Everyone getting their minds blown in this episode

I'm pretty sure it's TinnGun, actually

Some punch the shitty homophobic teacher

No, really, someone punch him

FUCK ME! Jorn punched him! Good for you, sweetie!

You had better fire that homophobic teacher, ma'am

YES DESTROY HIM

Oh no I'm crying again

I love that some dramas just squeeze in redemption arcs for characters who don't deserve it. Then you have Jorn who hates unfairness to the point of punching a homophobic teacher. I love him.

Aww look at Sound kissing his boyfriend on stage in front of everyone. Good for them.

God they are so stinking cute

GDI I've hit the image limit and there's still another 30 minutes to go so I guess once final part 2

Part 2

[snickerdoodlles]

📘

salty prelude to this one, but: i watched my school president, found it absolutely adorable and couldn’t put it down until i finished it. then i tried our skyy 2: my school president and got about 10 min into the first one before i went ".....this is everything i hate in an AU" and stopped watching.

there's nothing that makes me back out of a fic faster than something that tries to force characters to fit other characters' dialogue/actions/whatever. i don't want to read two characters from one show reading out the script of a different movie, i want to see how those two characters would react and change if they'd been put into the situation/premise of a different movie. i think the premise of Gun as school president vs Tinn the music club head could've been a lot of fun, but i want to see Gun and Tinn in those roles, not Gun playing out Tinn's scenes and vice versa. it's such a missed opportunity and the few cute moments that were present can't sway me from my overall irritation. :/

so with that spicy take out of the way, some notes on how i'd do a msp roleswap AU:

Gun is still forced into the school president role. this is literally the universe conspiring against him. Jorn is 1000% unsympathetic to his plight and has to follow Gun any time the music club is involved because he overheard Gun lamenting he forgets the rulebook every time Tinn smiles. honestly, he deserves senior status for this nonsense. his college application is absolutely going to reference working under these unjust conditions.

music club still features Pat, Yo, and Win alongside Tinn and Tiw. Yo can keep Pat's glasses because that was funny. but Gun's friend group is Sound and Por, and Sound is still a popular guitar soloist on youtube because:

Tiw: what our club needs is new growth! we need fresh eyes! fresh ears! fresh hands! we need *points to Sound* HIM! Tinn: nO

Tiw: what?????? Tinn: we've been music rivals since elementary school, i will NOT work with the enemy

Tiw: but Tinn! you must! our club depends on it!!! THINK OF OUR FUTURE TINN Tinn, to the tune of 'even my bed hates me': why does the universe conspire against me 😭😭

-cut to Tinn approaching Sound-

Tinn: hi. Sound. i- Sound: -want me to carry your mediocre band through the festival so you can pretend you bring glory to the school and your club won't get kicked. let me save you your breath: no. Tinn: well, i- we- WE DONT NEED YOU ANYWAYS JERK

not seen by Tinn is Gun materializing behind a pillar to Stare Down Sound. Do It For His Honey Sound. We Are Friends Sound. Do It For Him Sound. You Should Help Your Friends Sound.

Sound, gritting his teeth: ...fine Tiw teleporting to slap his hand over Tinn's mouth before he can object: AWESOME practice starts at 3! :D!

-cut to music club practice-

Tiw holding Sound's shoulders: hey guys! as you can see, we have new blood in the club! Pat: Sound i get, we wanted him. but what's with other two? *camera pans out to show Gun and Por sitting in the back*

Gun and Por: *keep on smiling, maybe they won't notice* Sound, sighing to the heavens: this is why i'm a fucking soloist

you've seen Gun's ridiculous jealousy and Tinn's unhinged crush fantasies, now get ready for *drum rolls* Gun's unhinged daydreams of jealous!Tinn ����

Gun's regular reoccurring fantasy is Tinn being so overcome with jealousy he stakes his claim on him. no cutesy daydreams of heart equations or mv-esque beach hangouts, Gun's daydreaming about Tinn getting so annoyed and jealous about Gun's attention not being solely on him that he kicks the rest of the band out of their study group or serenades him in front of the whole school. he wants them to be the smug It couple of their school and anyone talking to Tinn is potential fodder for a daydream starring Gun draping himself over Tinn's shoulder and rubbing "we're BOYFRIENDS" in everyone's faces.

so those are a handful of things i'd change. there's still more proper plot things i'd change to maximize Gun and Tinn being ridiculous in their new roles, but whatever no one cares lol. however, for all the things i'd change, the one absolutely most essential thing i'd keep from our skyy 2 canon are the lion and chinchilla headbands. adorable, sensational, no notes, they could've just released 40min of the actors wearing those and teasing each other and i'd eat it up like a starved man at a banquet.

[[ ask me about fics im not writing ]]

[malepresentingleg]

My School President: last episode - some thoughts (with spoilers, with no order)

First of all- idk what to do with my life anymore now that it's over FUCK.

It was SUCH a good finale to SUCH a good series, simply 😘👌

The first scene with Tinn's mom confronting him and then seeing how fucking terrified he is and taking a step back because of this? boy did I cry. Best mom award to you my lady (you can start a collection).

The side by side with Gun's mom just broke my fucking heart. Their phone call, Gun being so understanding. Everything was just perfect!!!

The talk between Tinn's parents just. Wreck my heart why don't you?

Them secretly dating and flirting all the time and only poor Por was oblivious? 10/10, amazing. (Also I love how from "the prom is tomorrow" from last episode we now got a whole era of secretly officially boyfriends sldksalskdas )

Jealous Gun comeback! + some wlw mlm solidarity with a gay lesbian fake couple.

Was their first kiss really that casual?? it was cute af and Gun was so sneaky to turn his head like that damn. Ik it was just some pecks but it was very very cute.

This episodes shows why you shouldn't ship irl people god this is 😬😬😬 even when things did work out it was soooo yuck.

Did love the friends group teasing thought- that's definitely allowed and some might say even required. And literally everyone knew except Por 😭😭😂😂 ("Sound and I don't keep secrets"!!! I screamed).

But Por not revealing a secret relationship with Tiw? Them not even "getting together"???? 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 that's me, they did us DIRTY.

Phat crying in singleness was so fucking funny, Phat, I feel you 🤘😔

Gun using the "pinch your nose so you don't cry technique" in the fucking rain, they sure do know how to make US cry amirite ha haha 😭😭😭

Ok but we can all agree Jorn is literally in love with Tinn which is why he was so hurt and mad, but also why he punched the homophobic teacher?

Speaking of that, I'm very glad Jorn did but DAMN did I want Tinn to.

Once again, best mom reward to Tinn's mom 😭🥺

The homophobia was so gross but also I'm glad for the way they addressed it in the series, but also that it wasn't the whole focus of the episode like we might have feared, and we did get a lot of fluff :')

UGh all the fan service during prom was so weird and yucky for me, not a fan😬

The hashtag they keep talking about actually says "my boyfriend* is the school president" in case you were wondering.

*it's a gender-neutral term like "partner", but it's used like boyfriend/girlfriend in English and not as marked as "partner" might be

The dinner at Tinn's immediately made me think of Bad Buddy 😭

It was so cute and so perfectly awkward, I love Tinn's dad so much (way to throw your son under the bus ksdjfskdfhs) and again, best mom reward to give here :') it was so awkward but she clearly tried her best and she died a little when Gun called her mom 😂

The final scene was so sweet, and it was all very fitting for a high school series, which is what this is!

I LOVE how in the end, this is a series about FRIENDSHIP and they gave that the proper focus and screentime

In conclusion, I'm gonna spend my time rewatching this again and again until My Skyy 2 :')

[saschaederer]

- Correction of the threat published 10 days ago, of Taylor Swift in this setting, https://images.app.goo.gl/HE5qnJbtBAUfKHq29: It actually having been her in color, reminiscent of this image https://images.app.goo.gl/JhxBYDQotfY6MhVD6

- Threat of Jorne Marc Siebrands (an ex flatmate of mine) and Denise Oppitz (my ex girlfriend) getting prostituted to each other

- A green light being weirdly reflected in Teddy Baldassare's glasses, and a split second image of him, interrupting B-roll in this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9T2bnOliRb8 (in initial reference to the depiction of a Delta alter in the thumbnail of this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzaKC7zWu5o&pp=ygUQaWxsdXNpb24gb2YgdGltZQ%3D%3D, which is partially a threat of me getting tortured)

- "This whole towns a pussy, just waiting to get fucked" (to the 'The Lonely Island - Jack Sparrow (feat. Michael Bolton)' playing in my head)

- Numerous coded references in this video https://x.com/trhlofficial/status/1869612472661168220?s=46&t=8BkusnIkW2uki99TqYWYEw - "Coded Reference" - "Wank / Coded Reference" - "Wank Tissue" (Threat in initial reference to my penis 'disappearing')

- "Flat" (in 'Jordan Peterson' voice)

- Pseudo hallucination (flash of light) of a flatworm (A threat in initial reference to me getting infected with such)

- "I will back for more" (Partially insinuating 'I'll be back for more', initial reference to the system)

- Threat published earlier today, 'Everyone should die': "Must"

- Threat published earlier today, 'Amazon' (in partial reference to Tomoko Kuriyama getting tortured): Partially a threat of me getting castrated (potentially instead))

- "You're a sigma male" (initially alluding to me)

- An image on X of an elderly couple throwing the dust of a deceased person into the lake, their reflection on the water surface looking as if they're doing the Nazi Salute, the reflection of the dust looking like a big, floating hand (initial reference to the system) and rainbow colors in the mist (A threat in initial reference to me getting castrated)

- https://x.com/Halleyapps/status/1870514571699442045 - https://x.com/elonmusk/status/1870200395823276310

- "Tut mir leid Sascha" (Ger: 'I'm sorry Sascha', in 'Denise Opitz' voice, initial reference to her having potentially commanded, negotiated or abnegated torture unto me)

- "BANKS" (in initial reference to the artist)

- "Rarran" (in initial reference to the content creator)

- "I genuinely really like you" (In 'BANKS' / 'Taylor Swift' voice, initially alluding to me. Note: The system now conditioned me to perceive a specific voice representing front alters of Taylor Swift, to now also represent 'BANKS')

- "Schwach" (Ger: 'Weak', in 'Julian Sens' voice, initially alluding to how I didn't publish "Somit (fangen wir an)" (Ger: 'So (we begin)') in his voice earlier, since I didn't remember anymore the exact wording and knew that the system also voiced something similar in English, although in hindsight I now notice that it didn't matter because the rest of the threat pertained my own thought)

- "Schwanz" (Ger: 'Cock', in 'Julian Sens' voice)

- Several pseudo hallucinations (flash of light) of spots, reminiscent of the second last image in my AMV, here: https://www.facebook.com/ratherthinktwice/videos/545856839774604

______________________________________________

REPORTS:

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How I handle threats I receive (Last Update: 20. 12. 2024):

[eliotquillon]

i’m actually really intrigued by wraiths because by far they’re the faction we know the least about - we know a lot about changelings and sorcerers because of the settings and protagonists of witherward and wayward, oracles get a pretty good showing through cogna + the overall focus on how weird they are in witherward and cassia’s entire self actualisation in wayward hinges on her being with an oracle, the psi have delphine and there are scenes in both witherward and wayward set in the underground because of how grand a location it is, whisperers get alitz + the scene at jorn’s house + technically also lev (although we are encouraged to think of him solely as a sorcerer), and wraiths get…nothing?? like yes there’s fowler in witherward but we are very much encouraged to think of the order of the shadows as their own separate faction - they get their own grouping on the opening list of factions and leaders, they’re exempt from the principles, and i don’t think it’s ever explicitly said that ONLY wraiths can be members - and there’s no wraith character in wayward (obviously ollivan’s backstory hinges on the murder of jonas benn, but benn never appears ‘on screen’ like the other examples; ollivan’s recount of the fight to sybella is very much a tell-not-show unlike a lot of the other flashbacks).

there are no scenes set in the north, either—which is especially weird because the only other ‘unexplored’ faction territory is the docklands, and even then there’s several good reasons why we don’t see it. e.g in witherward it’s because oracles are out to kill ilsa so it’s far too dangerous for her to get anywhere near the border, and there are a LOT of reasons in wayward that essentially boil down to ‘for power balancing reasons violet isn’t allowed to drink oracle magic, so there’s no reason for characters to go to the docklands’. also, like, hannah mathewson is very obviously building up the mythology and mystique behind oracles as a faction, so it makes sense she wants to delay having a docklands reveal for as long as possible (hence the fakeout with cassia almost being exiled there in wayward). but there doesn’t seem to be a real reason why we haven’t seen the north yet? i can understand ollivan not being allowed to go there when he’s convicted of murdering a wraith, but like. i’m shocked cassia didn’t have a scene there in the violet investigation phase. or that ilsa didn’t have a scene in witherward where she pressured fowler into taking her for some reason. i think there is SOMETHING going on with wraiths — the link between alana’s decision to ‘rebel’ by having a wraith boyfriend as a teenager + the fact that ollivan was specifically framed for murdering a wraith has NOT gone unnoticed by me — but for the life of me i can’t imagine why we’ve been given such little info on them when every other faction is really well balanced. the delusional part of my brain that still believes in witherward book 3 is wondering if fowler was intended to be a book 3 protagonist (split fowler/eliot pov would go fucking HARD) and that’s why there’s been a bit of an information diet on wraiths because mathewson has a specific angle on them planned (before wayward came out sorcerers were similarly very underdeveloped in witherward) but also as i’ve mentioned i think the order of the shadows is distinct enough to be its own thing so?? who the fuck knows what’s happening with the wraiths in the witherwardverse. Compels me tho

pour one out for the wraiths in witherward/wayward because every time they’re mentioned (rare as that is) they are almost never having a good time

[emzawheezy]

My friend is doing that hunger games generator thing with 6 previous characters for each person in the group (so 36 characters total) and THREE of mine are all technically the same character because I’ve played Jorn so many times in so many different systems. Different races and classes, but if there’s a way to boil down the essence of “monster man is a giant bear and hits things with his fists and sharp objects” and the occasional “struggles with his humanity as a shape shifting monster behind the mask of the funny dummy fighter” in your chosen role playing game, I Will Find It and play Jorn, again.

[wifelinkmtg]

gotta get back. back to the present samurai jesent

*wh-cha*

I am ten goddamn sets behind but I have to catch up because we’re almost back to The Horniest Goddamn Plane In All Of Magic Canon (that’d be New Phyrexia, babes!) and if I don’t cover that in uncomfortable detail, then what was this blog even for? We got some ground to cover, so let’s get going.

CORE SET 2021

Good news! Unlike Core Set 2020, this one isn’t a complete wash!

Indulging Patrician (art by Miranda Meeks)

Meeks giving vampire-fuckers exactly what they want here. Rose-tinted diaphanous silks & equally-diaphanous bats, the delicate damask patterns, the bridal carry, the victim’s languid pose, the collarbones, the blood - but for me, it’s the contrast between the vampire’s self-possessed hauteur and the trickle of blood down her throat that really makes this work.

Liliana, Waker of the Dead (art by Anna Steinbauer)

Liliana almost always makes the list, of course, but usually she gets here through raw displays of power and dominance. Steinbauer’s taken a different tack here, though, constructing this pastoral idyll centered around Liliana as a Gothic heroine. Is that sharp-edged pensiveness hesitation? Regret? Whatever it is, it’s a vulnerability we don’t usually get to see with her. This is easily, easily my favorite Liliana. It’s also about forty percent more Audrey Hepburn than typical, which. Yeah, that works for me.

KALDHEIM

man i just really do not care for the art direction in Kaldheim if I’m being honest. “viking plane” has a lot of potential and most of the art here is well-executed i just can’t help but feeling like the briefs the artists were given were kind of half-assed. like they have gods of DEATH and FEAR and they just look like whole foods hipsters. still, though! couple of hot valkyries.

Eradicator Valkyrie (art by Tyler Jacobson)

You really have to appreciate when someone just fully commits to a vibe. She could have stopped with the corpse paint and the black and gold everything but she went that extra mile for the blue flame wings and the smoldering pillar of the damned.

Youthful Valkyrie (art by Anna Steinbauer)

Yeahhhhh, I knew I could count on Steinbauer to deliver something ineffably sapphic. Hot, broody warrior angel fits the bill. Thank you for your service as always, ma’am.

HONORABLE MENTION: Jorn, God of Winter (art by Magali Villeneuve)

I gotta give credit where credit is due: in one of the drier sets in a very neutered Magic the Gathering era, Villeneuve has made a god who one million percent fucks. This rules.

STRIXHAVEN: SCHOOL OF MAGES

You know, I figured there’d be more candidates at wizard college, if for no other reason than there’d be more girls with glasses - but no, not even Goth Entomologist House OR Bitchy Poet Vampire House produced a single hit between the two of them. Here’s what we do get:

Professor Onyx (art by Kieran Yanner)

Liliana Vess: MILF professor version. I don’t need to say more than this, the scenario writes itself. Still, I do wanna pause and note the shoulder battlements. This is a woman who knows the value of fortifying gun emplacements, by which, yes, I do mean her tits.

Dragonsguard Elite (art by David Rapoza)

Oh yeah this is genuinely horny. Big owl glasses, perfect facial features, picturesque windblown hair, a dramatic display of power, those curves. I’ve really missed art that manages to be self-indulgent but not boring. More of this!

ADVENTURES IN THE FORGOTTEN REALMS

I have a great deal of resentment about the D&D crossover sets in terms of flavor. You can’t make Lolth, Zariel, and Mordenkainen planeswalkers in Magic canon and then be like oh well but no not really it’s not like they can go to Ravnica or something like that. Motherfucker then they’re not planeswalkers! You didn’t even bother to make Lolth hot! That was a fucking slam dunk! Three different D&D sets and you didn’t even include a single marilith!

I could keep going, at great length, but instead I’m choosing to be responsible and talk about the hot girls.

Ingenious Smith (art by Nicholas Elias)

I’m going to confess to spending an unspecified-but-lesbian amount of time watching Simone Giertz build weird shit on youtube. This scratches that same primal dyke itch of wanting to watch a clever, funny woman make something with her hands, but with bigger biceps.

Djinni Windseer (art by Livia Prima)

Look, man, sometimes what you want is a hot blue lady in a tornado.

Kalain, Reclusive Painter (art by Justine Cruz)

Cruz is almost a complete newcomer to Magic the Gathering here, which is really impressive because Kalain is the clear stand-out of this set. I personally wouldn’t choose to paint in my finest red doublet, but obviously this is a deficiency in my commitment to the Byronic artist Aesthetic. Obviously I don’t glower intensely enough. Obviously I don’t dress enough like a mildly-genderfluid Prussian vampire. Rest assured Kalain will be making none of these rookie mistakes!

I genuinely have so much gender envy about Kalain, holy shit.

OKAY progress made. This was the tail end of the drought. We got two Innistrad sets next, and whatever else you wanna say about those sets, I’m pretty sure we get more hits in even just one of them than we did in the four sets covered here together. Next time we got: girls accessorizing with bones, girls accessorizing with snakes, Hot Crossbow Autumn, woman laughing alone with shovel, dog mom, and so, so many vampires.

[frauschneidersridingcrop]

Tropes in Rammstein fics that I will never tire of:

Schneider’s military contacts

Richard has spiky hair no mater what era the story is supposed to take place in

All the boys are in love with Frau

Richard is the subbiest sub to ever sub even with Till

Zoran and Jorn are often antagonists AUs, but Jonas is always a friend

Richard dramatically fucking off to New York after an argument

Conveniently having each person from the main pairing in hotel rooms right next to each other

The boys have to live together when recording or touring. Therefore, they are always recording or touring

In Tillchard fics, Nele and Khira knowing that their dads have been in love for years even if Richard and Till themselves didn’t

Pre and Early Rammstein era fics where Aljoscha is just there being wonderful

We will never escape Richard’s Ugly Shirts TM even in fanfiction. GOOD

Paul is simultaneously tired of Richard’s shit and encouraging of it

Till asking Richard to make donuts

Flake and Ollie fucking off and doing their own thing so they don’t have to deal with whatever drama the other four are going through

Richard’s romantic interest being jealous of Joe Letz

Joe Letz

Schneider gets called “Doom” or “Doomie” more than he does in real life

Edit:

Richard Whump

Feel free to add on 👍

[carpememes]

Kitchen & Jorn Show Starters

“Generally speaking, I think it’s good we have mouths. But... I have some notes.”

“I love 19, that’s the age I lost my virginity at” “Same” “Oh my god, TWINSIES”

“Come up with a new thing to say. Don’t just repeat what I say.”

“Tastes like WEEEED.”

“If you wanna poop, have I got the bar for you.”

“I’m a MONSTER!”

“We’re not gonna be wrong. We’ve never been wrong in our entire lives.”

“I LOVE rock n’ roll.”

“Okay we get it. You have a family.”

“Could that be my fault? NO. Nothing ever is my fault.”

“I gave you one job!”

“I gave you one job! And that was to be cute! And you succeeded!”

“They’re only stuck to the pan, like, a lot.”

“Some of the best people I know look goofy, including me.”

“Do you need a hug?” 

“I think I just need, honestly- Yeah I’ll take a hug.”

“I love hugs! I didn’t think I was gonna get one.”

“You gotta go full homo on your brie.”

“It was your HUBRIS that took you down!”

“It’s my improv show. I’m inviting you and ten friends!”

“When you said that it made me feel involuntarily 24.”

“Full frontal semi-hard cheese!”

“I love when a menacing woman shows up with a pot full of mush.”

“I feel very much like a lunch lady.”

“Just because the girl took out her ponytail and took off her glasses doesn’t mean she’s available to you! You should have seen her potential all along!”

“I am wired right now.”

“We can TRY and un-ring this bell.”

“We’re not gonna rawdog this pasta.”

“Is this a sandwich for ANTS??”

“Do you wanna be right or do you wanna go home?

“Do I wanna be right or do I wanna go home?”

“We’re just doing our best with our mouths.”

“That’s what it is. Dragon flavor.”

“She’s haunted, baby. And she’s loving it.”

“Not to get real in the middle of a little food fight...”

“It’s fine. Everyone shut up.”

“I’ll have a breakdown in the tub later. As is my Friday tradition.”

“There was a lot of theatrics with your cooking situation.”

“ I’m [Name] and I’m rude and accurate with frequency!”

“Well, I was keeping it a mystery but [name] gave up the ghost”

“I fucking hate Christmas, it’s canceled.”

“If you’re looking for moistness of course you’re gonna go with your wife!”

“Sabotage!” “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?”

“You  hear that sound? That’s the sound of me winning.”

“Yeah we wanna make a fuck tent.”

“I’ve done absolutely no research, I will defer to you.”

“Ok we’re gonna do it your way then. Which I bet is the most awesome way to do it.”

“We are not getting our security deposit back.”

“I'm gonna go in the mental breakdown hole.”

“Ooooooh. She’s so stable.”

[theladysherlock]

STUPID ARCHITECTURE TRIVIA EXCHANGE! Tag you're it!

Oooh I sent you some in your inbox BUT I always have more!!

If I remember correctly, the Sydney Opera House was super complicated to build, and Jorn Utzon was going way over budget and over time, because it’s a damn complicated structure. But he received one (1) piece of criticism from the Prime Minister at the time and fucking quit. Just absolutely rage quit the project. Obviously it eventually got finished but like. What would you even do at that point. 

Also, one of my favorite architectural features are caryatids! I just think they’re neat. :D

Like we COULD make this a regular column, but instead we decided to make it a whole sculpture that is ALSO a column. Really going above and beyond, I love it

[welcome-to-oslov]

Davita mentions a lot how Tilrey is "naturally submissive", including here at the end as part of the reason she's shocked and thinks she underestimated him (she sure did!). Gourmanian was also the first person to tell him he is - which surprised and troubled him.

Is he though? 🤔

Forcing himself to be (become?) submissive was the fundamental struggle he went through - and I think to an extent was not natural to him (maybe?).

So much of his journey was being forced to make the decision to take submission to a new level:

The first time he slept with Malsha - the first time he made himself not physically resist; though it was a long time before he completely stopped trying to verbally resist, from the time in the car with Krisha, to Spring Fling, to Linden's first beating. (He even submitted when Malsha told him to come back to bed, and cried in Malsha's arms).

The first time he fucked Malsha - he found it so overwhelming, being brought to tears though not quite understanding why; the last time he'd ever done that was sweetly with Dal, and now his life has become this.

Sleeping with the men he was sent to; each time an exercise in forcing himself to "do this".

Gourmanian, where he was surprised to enjoy - crave - the physical sensations of being out of control, yet left uneasy. Partly, b/c despite what Gourmanian said, maybe he could sense Gourmanian was getting off on overpowering/overwhelming him, whether pleasurably as that night or brutally as in Spring Fling (he wouldn't let up trying to bring Tilrey back into those memories).

Linden/Jorning: we haven't yet seen what Jorning gets up to, but we know from Tilrey's memories that he submits to things not out of free will but to end beatings he'd already submitted to but now wants out of - since he doesn't (can't?) rescind his submission to those, he takes another step up in submission in ways we'll see play out.

His first time with Davita: he was surprised to see the huge wooden cock come out, but chose to submit to it as one of his first experiences choosing to re-enact trauma in order to tell himself he's in control this time. Which kind of became an addicting/compulsive pattern for him over many encounters with many people over the ensuing years.

So anyway, for me, I am still wrapping my head around what Tilrey's true relationship with submission may be 🤔. It seems making himself submit was, each time from the beginning & throughout, very traumatic emotionally on him; a trauma that changes/shapes you. It changed so much how he expresses himself, sees himself, interacts with Upstarts as well as those he loves throughout his life.

Now, his reaching the point where he *cannot* submit to anyone - he must lead! - is making me mull over all of this again! In some ways it must feel equally as hard, in the opposite way, as that very first time he let ("let") Malsha touch him.

I’m still wrapping myself around his true relationship with submission too! This is one of those knots that is so hard to untangle, especially with someone who has been abused. It’s easy for Davita to say he is “naturally submissive” (Besha too) because that’s part of her ideology. Laborers (and low Upstarts) are “supposed” to want to be told what to do.

But real life and real desires are so much more complicated. Someone who wants to submit sexually, in a safe space with a safe partner, might not be at all submissive in a different setting or when they feel unsafe.

Tilrey has a long history of being forced to submit in unsafe ways, as in your examples! So initially he hates it, and if he does feel any pleasure, he’s ashamed. Bror is the first one to tell him that sexual submission can be a free choice someone makes, even someone who is powerful outside the bedroom. Gourmanian knows that and claims to offer that safe experience, but Tilrey doesn’t have free choice with him, so it’s not really safe. As he goes through life, he’ll seek out similar experiences where he has more and more control over the boundaries.

So is he really submissive? I don’t know, but this character continually makes me question what that means. I do think by nature Tilrey is introverted and not someone who tends to rush into every situation and dominate it. He likes to let things wash over him, process, and then decide on a course of action. (That slowness is why Einara was frustrated by him!) But he’s also someone who has a strong will and ideas about how things should be, and he’s willing to take a leadership role to make things better.

So I think when Davita says he’s naturally submissive, she’s mapping the binaries of D/s onto the real world, which doesn’t work! Even in the bedroom, she wanted to switch roles with Tilrey at one point. Power dynamics in and outside sex can be much more fluid than she realizes.

Curious to hear more thoughts on this, because I think about it a lot!

[corelliaxdreaming]

I just watched the video of Kristin and Jen of The Kitchen and Jorn Show on YouTube talking about how they're both trying out she/they pronouns. And it's great, I'm so happy for them, and they brought up a lot of really interesting things, like Kristin saying they've always felt pressure to present as really femme because of being fat. I've also been doing some research on gender identities in prep to possibly write he/they Wes in a "the Fab Four are all super queer but not romantically/sexually involved with each other, because fuck yeah queer frienship." And the more I learn about and hear trans/enby people talk about gender, the more I realize that as a cis person I'll never truly understand it. And that's okay! Not to pump myself up or anything, but I feel like as a queer person I'm more likely to just accept people at their word for their identities and just let people live, whereas a cishetallo person might be, y'know, shitty about it. And you should try to understand, but in the end the important thing is that you just respect people. Let them tell you who they are, ask questions if they're comfortable answering, use the pronouns and names they tell you to. I dunno what I'm really trying to say here, except that gender sure is complicated, and I respect and love all of my trans and enby siblings. <3

[age-of-shadows]

yet another Avantasia theory by yours truly on how all the albums are connected

*ahem* OKAY, fellow avantasian brothers, sisters, siblings... We’re all reunited here in this post because I had a big brain moment about a couple of hours ago and somehow managed to connect all of the Avantasia albums as well as uncover what the actual Avantasia world is apart from Tobi’s definition of it.

This post is probably going to be really long and I already would like to apologise if there’s anything you don’t understand because I didn’t phrase it right (english ain’t my first language so... there might be a lot of mistakes), plus, I’m not Tobias so I can be completely wrong about this but HEY, THEORIES. I don’t even know if anyone’s even thought about this but I’ve literlaly never read about it and trust me, I’ve done a lot of Avantasia research in this year. And I’m aware it’s very, VERY hard to get the album plots right (man... I’ve spent months trying to figure out The Wicked Trilogy and Mystery of Time/Ghostlights, and even if I now think I have a clearer idea of what they’re about, whenever I listen to them I discover new things about them); but I do know reading other theories help people understand the lore and I hope this helps in some way.

Here we go: what is Avantasia? Apart from it obviously being the name of the project, Tobias describes it as a “world beyond human imagination”. At first, this definition is actually very clear and direct, isn’t it? Specially in The Metal Opera since all the story is well written down, and besides, the lyrics are clearer. Anyway, I have just finished reading the story from the booklets (I have to look up the one from part one because I only own part two for now... whoops) and I can do a summary of it: 

"Many ways lead to Rome. Seven times one way for all that leads to a world beyond our inagination."

This is said in one of the seven books that is part of the seven books and seven seals. What are these seals and books even? Well, if you’re only able to listen to the music and don’t have access to the booklets like I did just now, you for sure have noticed the seals do have a big part in the plot. These seven seals were made to be able to enter the spiritual world in flesh and blood. And yes, you guessed it: the spiritual world is Avantasia. They were made by three magicians of the universe thousands of years ago because they knew mankind would be born and they would need this spiritual world for themselves to find peace, and they should also take care of it.

Now: the famous Avantasia Tower, what even is it? Well, some higher entity that can be concieved as a God, maybe not much of a good one, though, is sealed in this Tower. If the seven seals were brought to the Tower, Avantasia would be locked and this God would break free, bringing chaos to mankind. And what would happen if Avantasia is locked? Humans would lose this spiritual world, and when things get tough, they wouldn’t be able to turn anywhere to save themselves, and who knows if that would lead to their destruction.

So, Avantasia has to be kept alive and passed on to the newer generations. 

Also, one is also able to reach Avantasia with their spirit only (this is what Gabriel does), but it’s dangerous since it’s as if their soul trascends and so their body is left in our flesh and blood world. Could this also mean that, if a soul dies in Avantasia, it will never return to its material body? Who knows? Definitely not me, but anyway! Let’s keep going!

Now that we know what Avantasia is, how is it connected to the other three stories if it’s never really mentioned at all? How could we know? Again, this is just a theory and I’m probably wrong.

Let’s go into The Wicked Trilogy then, which is probably the most abstract album and also the hardest to understand, maybe. I already talked about my headcanons about Scarecrow in a post, but I definitely think he’s got some sort of mental illness and that’s why he does the things he does. Anyway... the setting is kind of confusing, but to get a clear starting point: Roy Khan’s character is named Psychiatrist, and he’s the first one that appears in the album along with Scarecrow. There’s a theory going around that this story happens in a hospital, or maybe a psychiatric, so we can guess Scarecrow is hospitalised because of this illness. However... does the rest of the story happen in the hospital physically? This is when Avantasia comes in:

I don’t believe Scarecrow’s journey takes place in the hospital... but in Avantasia. Taking into account almost all of the characters are his own feelings or just parts of him (aka, Bob Catley being Conscience, Jorn Lande being Mephistopheles as a form of temptation...) except for Amanda Somerville’s character, who definitely exists in real life as Scarecrow’s real love interest; it makes a lot of sense. But, oh, how can that world be Avantasia if none of the elements described in The Metal Opera aren’t there? Well, I won’t write the conclusion just yet, but the Avantasia world in The Wicked Trilogy really looks like how we can perceive Scarecrow himself: empty, cold, fucked up... Can you see where this is going?

And now, getting into The Mystery of Time and Ghostlights, there is a very, VERY clear reference to the Avantasia world we see in The Metal Opera, in Savior in the Clockwork. Our protagonist Aaron Blackwell is working non stop in a mantlepiece clock whose hands don’t move for some reason, he overworks himself to the point he loses conscience... or as he says in the booklet notes, he loses the conscience “he had been used to”; in anyway, he passes out on the table. This is kind of similar to how Gabriel gets into Avantasia, isn’t it? Plus, the lyrics of this song are very, very interesting...

“Now am I half asleep or half unconscious, Half 'adream'? I can't move as I am stuck in bright lucidity I can feel and hear and see But I won't comprehend I see fire that I won't decipher I see giant evil tower to a blackened sky I feel blessed with evidence of what I can't define Swinging blade of the lowering perpendicular I see clarity I won't remember Do I dream Is it only fantasy and matter just a thought I see And time is all they need to seal away eternity”

“Giant evil tower”, “seal away eternity”... Yes, that is definitely Avantasia, a version that’s more close to the The Metal Opera’s Avantasia than the one in The Wicked Trilogy. Aaron accidentally gets into Avantasia... the real Avantasia... and this, my friends, is why the Scientists and Magician go to Aaron and ask him for help: they somehow know he has seen the real thing.

This mystery of time... it has something to do with Avantasia, this is why they’re keeping it as a secret, just like the three clerics in The Metal Opera.

Now... Ghostlights, which is more symbolic than this previous album... and I think you can now guess why: it mainly takes part in Avantasia, during Let The Storm Descend Upon you is when it happens, precisely. I have no idea if the Mystery of a Blood Red Rose video can serve as a clue, but Aaron falls unconscious in the end so... perhaps he entered the Avantasia world in the spiritual form, however... that’s not the same Avantasia world he had been to previously, this is more like Scarecrow’s Avantasia in a way.

In this Avantasia world, it’s where Aaron finds these Ghostlights, as well as some of his Scientists mates, did they get in all together? Perhaps it was the Magician who let them into this sort of spiritual world. This whole album really does seem to happen in another dimension, I already talked about the final tracks in my Aaron-Entity theory post, but they make it seem as if Aaron trascends to another plane completely. And the voices calling Aaron? Very much similar to Gabriel’s inner voices in The Metal Opera.

Last but not least, my favorite: Moonglow. We’ve got this Misplaced Entity, who’s thrown into a world they have no place in. They seek shelter in the night, the only place they’re comfortable in, until, when we reach the time the album is set in, they run to never come back to that one place, hiding from the dawn.

Now... How does Entity enter Avantasia? Easy: They enter in Ghost in the Moon, pretty quickly I must say. Let’s say... the glow of the moon is they gateway to Avantasia. Realized how they start talking about turning into a different being? That happens when you enter the spiritual world through your actual spirit, just like what happened to Gabriel (his appearance changes to fit the world). All the night, mysterious, eerie world in Moonglow is Avantasia.

I think all of this is enough to reach a conclusion:

There’s not only one Avantasia... there’s thousands, millions, even. Though, there is one real Avantasia, which is the core: that’s the Avantasia that appears in The Metal Opera, and the one Aaron sees when he passes out. Then, what are the other Avantasias? Easy: the connection each human has to the core, which means each human has a unique way of experiencing that connection; that is how the core of Avantasia is kept alive, even without letting every human into this core (let’s remember, it could be dangerous if the core of Avantasia was locked by humans).

This way, we can deduce how each of the protagonists experiences Avantasia: Gabriel goes to the core; Scarecrow and Entity experience Avantasia as a gateaway from their real, tormented lives and try to find happiness there instead of in the flesh and blood world; Aaron gets into the core by accident but, later on in Ghostlights, he explores his own connection, related to his thirst for knowledge... Remember?

"Many ways lead to Rome. Seven times one way for all that leads to a world beyond our inagination."

I think this is it for now... It is now 1am and trust me, I’ve tried my best to explain myself, so I hope you can understand this!

[improbablecarny]

Concert Highlights

What else can I say about Avantasia, dude?

Tobias Sammet: this guy rolls a nat 20 in charisma every time. Funny as hell, makes the audience interaction feel so genuine, oh and yeah, keeps putting out amazing fucking music that drags me on a personal level AND a musical level. A continued creative inspiration in basically every regard.

I hope Adrienne Cowan remains a part of their touring lineup and guests on the next album. She’s so good. Her taking on Moonglow and Farewell was incredible but expected, but seeing her ALSO take a run at Kiske’s part in Reach Out For the Light AND doing the thrash scream tradeoff with Ronnie in Book of Shallows?! Is there anything she can’t do???

One of my favourite parts of Avantasia shows is seeing new takes on older songs with a different vocalist lineup. (They didn’t do it this round but Eric’s take on Wicked Symphony might actually be my favourite version of the song) So this tour didn’t disappoint either with:

Ronnie SLAYING Master of the Pendulum

Herbie/Olli/Bob/Adrienne OWNING Shelter for the Rain

Eric and Jorn making me ASCEND with Promised Land

Geoff and Eric knocking Twisted Mind OUT OF THE PARK

Then we got Bob Catley ROCKING OUT on a tambourine in Mystery of a Blood Red Rose. Hello?? The best????

The music is great, everyone sounds amazing. The chemistry between the band members is wonderful, the banter is hilarious and audience engagement is A+.

Would I do it again?

Uh, yeah? Who do you think I am?

Here’s to next time 🍻

[thyssen79bartlett-blog]

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