#FUCK ADD SAD TO THE LIST BECAUSE WHY HENRY

[assandanattitude]

Red White and Royal Blue is so well written and acted, I'm feeling so many things

[wiktorianala]

Ma yapping about a game I just finished if anyone would care (and probably at some point getting out of topic, so just starting to talk about other stuffs)\/

Ok, so I just finished dsaf3 "good ending" and... what the fuck. Just to make things straight I accually replayed it 2nd time now, because 1st time was few hours ago, in the morning with no sleep so my brain was almost turned off, so ending seemed, not really interesting, nor emotional, at least not as much as innternet maked it seem, so that's why I just replayed it from last save (I just woke up so brain working just finey) and OH MY GOD WHO LET THIS MAN COOK? Like I've gotta say, I thought that I was "crying" hard over "evil route" (because honestly it not really made me cry but rather left me sad as fuck and not knowing what to do with myself), but holy shit after this thing I genuelly was in front of screen crying like a little fuckin baby (and stil left not knowing what to do with myself). I don't really think any game ever made me cry this hard, nah I bet I could say any piece of media. Gosh even now I want to cry again. Anyway I honestly was suprised that part that mostly break me was not the after battle with henry on flipside, but rather, at the end just thos tumbstones and all. Maybe because it all just cumulated at the end, I dunno. Honestly it's surelly gotta be for me one of thos games, for which I wish I could erase my memory, just to expirience them once more for first time. Closest to this might be when I'll finally get out of phase for it, for a longer time, just to replay entire serie again. Gotta say that arter palying all mayor routes from all 3 games (+ quite a few smaller ones) this serie surelly jumps into "fave games" category, right under portal2 (which is hightest place a game for me can go, because srry, but I hold very nostalgic connection for portal, and even if I'll find a game that I'll like more, thare's just like, I dunno a part of me saying "nostalgia at first place" so I can do shit about it), and that means I really fckn enjoyed it, because for now my faves only had "tier one (AKA. portal2)", and "tier two" wich was rest of my fave games, and now it has tier one (still the same), tier two which now include dsaf and tier three which is rest of faves (and if someone's interested "how much games are then here rn in total", answear would be... lemme check, It's five games in total on my fave list or more like "tha ultimate fave ones", and it's not because I play not many games, but rather that I rarelly find games that strike me in the way that, I don't know how to put it into words. I guess I just rarelly find "that one" type of stuff). Wait... didn't I get off topic? Hard to say. Ok, so anyway I really enjoyed it despite all of the cryies that occured ( and by this I mean not only 3rd game but honestly entire franchise because on "good ending" in 2nd game I broke too, and on just as I said somewhere before on "evil route" in 3rd too (on first one not thought, but it doesn't make me like it less) ( but no matter what 3rd is surelly my fave out of all)). And when I'll put my mind together , I'll think about concept for fanart (just like with evil route, a fanart directly of an specific ending) and maybe in spare time will make some doodles ( I'll have to think about in which art style it'll be(or wich one will fit it the best)). I know- I know I tend to make quite a lot (at least for my standards) arts from dsaf, BUT IT'S MY CURRENT FIXATION SO, I'M SORRRRRY. I guess next game I'll be playing will be dialtown, but for that to happen i want it to get on sale (just, so I could buy base game with dlc in price of just base (I know it don't work that way but I don't care))Yeah so ummm, that's all? I guess yes. Just like last time I bet noones reading that(and I don't mind it, after all I'm the one who decides to don't add tags to any just txt type of post, just so it won't pop up at any random person page, god it would feel awkward, especially looking at the point that I'm just writing the way that I would talk to someone so "first thing that comes to mind get noted" so after some amount of time, stuffs that I write feel really stupid/cringey. Shit I'm off topic again) Anyway, Byee~*

[treatian]

The Chronicles of the Dark One: Hadestown

Chapter 4: Planning a Family Reunion

In all his time in Storybrooke, he'd never spent any time in the alley beside Granny's diner. And yet, suddenly, he found it was his new safe place. Between the fence and Granny's diner, he felt sheltered and hidden away in this new but familiar land. He wasn't sure what lay beyond this spot of town, but he felt secure enough here to hold the ball between his hands and gaze into it. He was unsure how a former Dark One had gotten his hands on one of these down here. But it was just another question he would add to the endless list of them forming in his head, a list that was shoved quickly aside when he looked down at the Looking Glass before him. He knew he needed the answers to those questions, but right now, there was one thing that was important and one thing only.

His family. He had to know what had happened to them. He had to know they were okay. And his gut told him to start with Belle. She was the one he was most worried about. Bae should be with Emma and Henry in the Land Without Magic somewhere, hopefully getting their life in order. He was sure there would be problems along the way, but at least they'd have each other. Belle, on the other hand…

He had to know she was okay, that she was being taken care of or at least managing life independently. He wasn't sure what he intended to do if she wasn't sure yet. But he'd fucking cross all of hell to get back to her and fix things for her if he had to.

So, he took a deep breath, focused on his Belle, then watched as the shadows inside the crystal ball began to morph and shift into something new. The light he saw within it died as it grew darker, and a small sphere began to lighten to the precise shade of Belle's skin tone. A moment later, her image appeared in front of him. He stifled a cry of relief and amazement that it had worked, that he could see her, a bright light in a dark place just as she'd always been. But then he began to take in the details. She was lying down. He hair had been pulled free as if she wanted to sleep, but she was still in her clothes, a long white shirt of some kind and something over her shoulders like a vest he couldn't clearly make out because of the blankets on top of her. But that wasn't a bed she was sleeping in. That was dirt. She was lying on the ground. Shadow and light played over her face, a familiar flicker of firelight from something close by. Staring up at him as she lay there like she could see him above her. She wasn't frowning or crying, but there was sadness in her eyes. Her cheeks looked a little more hollow than he'd like them to look, and the circles under her eyes suggested that she hadn't been sleeping. She was grieving.

He fought to take deep breaths. He expected her to be in mourning. He predicted that she'd be sad. But why the fuck was the love of his life sleeping in the dirt by a fire? Why was she grieving all by herself? Where had the curse spat her out? He was hopeful it would be where it had gotten her from, that Regina would release her or that the others would see to her release and look after her, but…maybe he was wrong? Had no one cared to come to take care of her? Had no one bothered to look for her?

His knuckles went white with anger as he stared down at her, and…her lips moved. Not in a swallow or even a twitch. She was talking. She was saying words he couldn't make out because crystal balls didn't allow sound; he needed a mirror for that. But she was obviously speaking. To who? Herself?

No. His heart dropped as she turned her head where she lay as if addressing someone close by. Wide-eyed, jealousy surged inside him as he willed the ball to show him more. Who was it? A man? He couldn't imagine Belle moving on so fast. How long had he been in that vault? Years? Decades? Belle didn't look that much older than he'd last seen her but-

Every thought he had ceased. Every internal function, breath, heartbeat, it all stopped as the ball responded to his silent desires and let him get a better look at the scene before him. He saw. But he couldn't believe it.

Belle wasn't with another man. At least not in that way, gods, he hoped not in that way. She was indeed lying on the ground with another person, but there was a blazing, roaring fire between the pair in what appeared to be a cave where they were camping. And the person on the other side of that heat source, the one having a friendly chat with her, sharing her company, was none other than Baelfire.

He had to tear his gaze from the ball to take a deep breath and wipe the tears he hadn't realized were coming out of his eyes. He couldn't help it. Devastation and anger and sorrow roared inside of him all at once. He didn't know what to address first!

What the fuck?!

It was wrong! It was all so wrong he didn't even know where to begin!

Bae and Belle were together?! There was no way that Belle could have outrun the undoing of the Curse, not with her memories intact, and even if she had managed, she wouldn't be out in a cave, camping, in clothes that looked like that! The implication was clear. Belle had gone back to the Enchanted Forest, just as she should have. But if Baelfire was with her, then that meant...Bae wasn't in the Land Without Magic with Emma. He was in the Enchanted Fucking Forest! He hadn't gone with Emma and Henry? After all he'd done and all he'd fought for where Henry was concerned, he'd just laid back, accepted his fate, and gone back home?! That didn't make sense! It didn't make any sense. Bae would have gone with Emma and Henry, and he would have stayed with them, even if Emma refused! He'd have gone unless…unless…

Fuck.

Bae would have gone...unless he hadn't known that he could.

Oh, hell. He'd thought it had been so straightforward. It had been fucking clear to him that there would be exceptions to who would go back and who wouldn't. As someone from the Enchanted Forest, the Curse would have taken Bae back if he had stayed in Storybrooke, but he hadn't been one of the cursed. He had been able to leave, just like Emma, Henry, and hell, even Pinocchio! All they had to do was step over the town line when it hit, and it would never take them. Henry couldn't go. He'd been a child of that world, not the Enchanted Forest. And Emma would never have let him be left behind alone; she'd have protested, and Regina would have known that she could stay. It would have been obvious! But Bae...

They'd been so caught up in fighting back Pan, so concerned with other things that he hadn't realized he wasn't clear enough. He'd left them with Regina and assumed that she would get it. He'd assumed his less-than-perfect, downright slow former student would understand the inner workings of that Curse. He'd assumed she'd be happy to let Baelfire and Emma Swan sail off into the distance with her son for a happily ever after.

He was a fucking idiot. Whether it was malicious or not, the message had not been clear because he'd trusted it to Regina. And now there they were. Baelfire and Belle, together, away from Emma and Henry, away from him, away from all they loved, grieving and sleeping in a damn cave! He'd never been so angry in all his life. He'd never been so disappointed in himself in all his life for not seeing this earlier and putting too much godsdamned faith in Regina!

He had to do something. He had to fix this. He hadn't a clue how to do it, but he knew he couldn't just sit here in the afterlife waiting for the next Dark One to arrive while this injustice was carried out. He had to…he had to…

Fuck!

He had to do something, but what that something was, he hadn't a clue. This was a new world, a different kind of realm that was far more unexpected than he'd ever dreamed. He didn't know where to start. He was here. Baelfire and Belle were in the Enchanted Forest, and Henry, Henry was…

He felt suddenly calm as he took one breath after another and turned his gaze back to the ball. He'd had three people in mind when he grabbed this crystal ball. He'd assumed he'd find two of them together, and indeed he had, but not the two that he'd wanted. So then all that remained was the third. The ball was clear, the busyness of his mind preventing it from getting a focus on any of his family members, but now…now he focused once more on just one. Henry. He wanted to see Henry and needed to see his grandson. If he wasn't with his Mother and Father, he had to be sure that Regina hadn't fucked up so bad that he was alone in the world. And so he gazed into the ball nervously. Seeing into The Land Without Magic had never worked when he'd been in the Enchanted Forest, but perhaps now...?

The shadows within the crystal bent and formed to his will. The haziness cleared, and much to his relief, an image formed.

There he was. Henry. He was sitting at a table, head down, staring into some sort of calculator-looking thing he kept fiddling with. It was a single glance, but it was enough. Oh, he'd grown so much! He was taller than he remembered, his hair a bit shaggier, and his cheeks! Cheekbones were emerging, along with a chin that reminded him of Emma and Mary Margaret. He was finally shedding the last remnants of his childhood baby fat and becoming a teenager. He was becoming a man. And he knew better than most just how a boy becoming a man needed a father. Even if he had-

There she was…Emma Swan. As if the ball had heard his thoughts and shifted his focus, the image in the ball pulled away so that he could see the picture more clearly. Henry Mills sat at a table with his technology, and Emma sat beside him as they ate dinner. They seemed put together. They seemed almost happy in their home like it was just a typical average day. They certainly didn't appear confused or scattered as he would have expected them to appear only a day after Storybrooke had been destroyed. And Henry couldn't have grown that much in just a day.

He didn't know if he wanted to sigh in relief or scream in frustration. Something was wrong. It was very wrong. Regina had gotten half of the instructions right. She'd at least ensured Henry was with his mother, though he would have preferred mother and father. But the timing seemed off. He'd only just arrived, and yet enough time had passed for Henry to grow, for Henry and Emma to be comfortably settled. Enough time had passed that Neal and Belle appeared comfortable together when their last interactions were tense but cordial at best?! What kind of hell was this that he'd landed in? A time where time seemed to fly by in the blink of an eye, and his family was maybe destitute but certainly separated. It was his worst nightmare, an absolute terror!

Or maybe…

Maybe.

He leaned there against Granny's diner's wall and let his thoughts collect, let his mind begin to weave options and plots together. What he stumbled on was not quite what he expected.

Maybe this was something good. Yes, he had wanted Emma and Bae to be together with Henry, and because of that, he'd prepared his heart for the shock of Belle residing alone for the rest of her life. But maybe, just maybe, something good could come from this mistake. After all, at this moment, no one was alone. Though not ideal, Henry had Emma, and Belle had Bae. And if he could, in fact, fix this, then the solution was to either get Emma and Henry to Baelfire or get Baelfire to Henry and Emma. And if he could get Bae to them, then it stood to reason that Bae could take Belle with him. No, he knew that Baelfire might never be as good for her as he would have been, but the time for that kind of thinking was over. He could at least be family to her. It would be a very confusing, wildly unusual sort of family, but it was always going to be that way regardless. At least it would be a family. At least his family would be together.

He was in the afterlife, a very strange and odd place indeed. Getting back to his family would take an act of resurrection he wasn't sure was possible. Dead was dead, and there was no way to reverse it. But pulling strings, getting his son and True Love to another realm, that was a difficult act, but far more likely than resurrection. And he should know; he'd already done it once before.

He could do this. He'd orchestrated the moving of heaven and earth once already; he could do it again. He could make it so that Bae could get back to his son. He could make it so that the cycle of fathers being separated from their sons was broken. He could make it so that his entire family was together. He could do this. He didn't yet know how he was going to do it, not yet, but he was the Dark One, and though he was in a bizarre version of it, he was, in fact, in Storybrooke.

He knew right where he had to begin.

[pm-my-hubbies]

Lani’s Crown | H.C.

Summary: Reader and Henry’s daughter has landed herself in a bit of trouble and needs to understand the importance they put into her hair.

Pairing: Dad!Henry x Black Mom!Reader

Word Count: 1.9k

I knew this day would come and unfortunately, I hadn’t prepared myself for it. “Hey, don’t forget you gotta have that talk with Lani pretty soon,” my conscience would remind me as I stared in awe at a queen with a head full of kinky hair. Like the snap of a hypnosis’ fingers, the task would slip away from me and I would return to whatever I had on my plate for the time being. Apparently, this “talk” wasn’t at the top of my to-do list.

My eyes shift from the shoulder length hair on the right side of my five year-old’s head to the gapped up left side. Something tells me she was reenacting Halle Berry’s notorious transformation scene from Catwoman as it’s become a favorite of hers in the past couple of weeks. This idea prompts me to hold in the snicker threatening to fall past my lips because right now is not a laughing matter.

“I honestly don’t know what to say Ailani.” I speak. It’s not that I’m mad at my baby because that’s what she is: a baby. She’s still struggling to steady the handlebars of her bicycle when she rides and her tongue has begun poking out the side of her mouth as she attempts to loop her shoe laces together. She doesn’t know how special her hair is because I hadn’t told her. And even if I did, it’ll take her brain ages to digest the information.

“I’m sorry, Mommy. I didn’t mean it.” she whimpers.

“I know baby but... why did you go for the scissors? You know you’re only supposed to use them for cutting paper and when adults are around. What happened?”

Today had been a good day at the restaurant. As the manager of the small-staffed bakery not too far from Lani’s school, majority of the tasks outside of sitting behind the desk fell onto me two weeks ago when three of the employees decided “a mental break” was necessary (I would’ve been fine if I hadn’t seen one of them chugging down beer after beer when I went out for drinks with some friends on a Friday night). Garlic wafted up my nostrils the moment I stepped over the threshold into our home and I knew something was up as my husband was cooking my comfort meal. He didn’t say anything when I asked of our daughter’s whereabouts. A nod in the direction of our dining room that was connected to the living room was all I needed to know something had happened. Lani has already placed her crayons to the side of her paper on the dining room table and peeked up at me with solemn eyes.

“Charlotte and I were play—” she began.

“Wait, Charlotte?”

Lani bowed her head in shame. “Yes.”

God fucking dammit. “Lani, why would... why would you play with Charlotte after Mommy told you to not be around her anymore?”

Her head was still low but I managed to catch the next statement clear as day. “Because she said I could make more friends if my hair was short like her and the other girls.”

I felt as if I were on fire. My body burned with anger and once again, it wasn’t directed towards Lani. Charlotte was once the little girl you wanted your children to play with every single day. But after some time, her true bad habits made an appearance and next thing you know, you were constantly disregarding the ringing of your doorbell as she shouted for your child. To add on to her pest-like behavior, Charlotte’s parents could never recognize the wrongs in her actions.

I shouldn’t be surprised such words could come from a child’s mouth but I am. Maybe it’s because it’s been a while since I allowed another kindergartener to bully me and I assumed times have changed for them to not talk out of their asses. Yet, here we are.

“Ailani, can you look at me? Please?” I calmly asked.

My daughter finally picked her head up and it was in this moment that all frustration I felt for her former friend dissipated. Her round cheeks were wet with fresh tears, brown eyes the size of saucers.

“Oh Ailani.” I cooed, walking around the coffee table dividing us to plant myself on the floor next to her. I pulled her onto my lap, her face pressing against my chest as her body racked with sobs. “Shhh, it’s okay.”

“I hurt your feelings, Mommy.”

“You did baby but that’s beside the point. Your feelings are hurting right now and it’s landed you in some mess.” I explained. Internally, I was chanting to not let the waterworks flow.

Lani continued her moment of sadness at most likely destroying the pride I held for her hair. The left side was the only destruction, which left more on her head. Still, blades made contact with the kinks at an inappropriate time.

Eventually, her body ceased the shaking and all I could feel was the large gulps she took as she calmed down. I guess now was the time to talk to her.

“You did hurt Mommy’s feelings because I love your hair. But at the same time, Mommy never told you how special your hair is so you wouldn’t do what you did.” I began. “Most girls want a crown to look like the Disney princesses they see on TV. I was one of those girls but I only wanted the tiara to be like the other girls. Do you hear me?”

She nodded. “Mmhm.”

“Good. Your grandmother told me that I didn’t need a crown to be pretty or like other girls because I already had one with me that followed me everywhere. And that, my Love, is my hair. Sit up for a second.” My daughter did as told, straddling my lap with bloodshot eyes looking into my watery ones. I placed my hand in her hair to massage her scalp. “The thing about your hair and my hair is that it’s unique. It’s what makes us beautiful. Some days we’ll braid it and other days we can wear it loose. The best thing about our hair is that it’s like a magicians hat to people that don’t look like us.”

“A magicians hat?”

“Mmhm. See, the only thing you know about a magicians hat is that it’s the same one they always wear. And every time they reach into it, it’s something new they pull out that amazes the audience every single time. With you, people will always see you with the same hair style until you straighten it. And every time you straighten it, it’ll be longer than before and amaze people each time. And that, my Darling, is because people are idiots when it comes to us and our hair.”

The cutest of giggles escaped Lani’s lips and I couldn’t help but to grin at the sound I got out of her. “Mommy no!”

“It’s true Lani! A lot of people don’t know much about our hair except to tell us how to style it. Your dad’s an exception, even though he can be a little dumb at times.”

“I heard that!” Henry exclaimed from the kitchen.

I chuckled as I leaned to the side to respond with, “Mind your business!”

“Can’t do that when you brought me into it.”

I glanced back at Lani with a smirk on my face. “You know what, your dad is right for once.”

Heavy footsteps echoed throughout the lower level of our home as Henry exited the kitchen to enter the living room where Lani and I sat. He held a similar smile to the one I wore when mocking his correctness. “Is this how you discipline our daughter when I’m not around? Throw me under the bus?”

“Not exactly.”

“Goodness woman.” He chuckled, treading over to where we rested. He swung his legs around my shoulder to plop down behind me on the sofa and place his hands on my shoulders. “Everything good now?”

Although her original hairstyle was jacked up now due to the scissors, I continued rubbing my hands through her beautiful hair. “I think so. But before I tell you to go upstairs and start running your bath water, I want you to remember something: girls like Charlotte are not your friend.”

“Your mother is right Lani.”

My head tilted up slightly so I could toss him a smile of appreciation for backing me up. “Friends do not tell you to change how you look so you can hang out with them. They chose to be your friend and should deal with it. Do you understand?”

“I think so.” Although it was meant to be a statement, she answered it more of like a question.

“Can you try to repeat that back for Mommy and Daddy but in your own words?”

She rapidly nodded her head. “Um... Charlotte should play with me because she likes how I look?”

“That’s our girl!” Henry praised her with a pinch to her cheeks.

“That’s right. And if she tells you what to do again, you either tell the teacher or tell her to stop. Yes?”

“Yes.” She affirmed.

“Good. Now go run your bath water for Mommy and then I’ll be up to wash you before we eat dinner.”

As soon as she hopped off my thighs to disappear up the stairs, Henry wrapped his arms around my neck. His lips landed on my cheek for peck. “You handled that well.” He mumbled.

I gently massaged his forearms with my hands. “You think so?”

“Yes. I was expecting the worse. Yelling, maybe a pop or two.”

“Some people will think I’m the worst parent for restricting my daughter from doing such a thing as today but that’s the thing: she’s not their daughter. If she cuts her hair, I have to bend over backwards and find styles for her hair and I really don’t have the time for that.” I elaborated, a huff following right after. “She’s lucky she did this today because now, she has an excuse to see her auntie Marilyn.”

“Oh but your Saturday.” I wasn’t looking at him but I could hear the pout in his voice as he pressed another kiss to my skin but this time on my neck.

I deeply exhaled. “I know, I know. I’ll just reserve it for Sunday like we’re supposed to anyways.”

Silence filled the spacious room now. Within seconds, the faint sound of water hitting the hard surface of our bath tub upstairs interrupted the peace that had quickly formed between Henry and I.

“Now that I’ve given her the heart-to heart talk, it’s your turn to talk with Charlotte’s parents.”

“What? Why me?” He groaned like a child restricted to the confines of his home on a Friday evening.

“Because I can’t catch a case. That little girl pissed me off and I won’t be so nice if I talk to her parents. And even if I did play nice, they’d still say something. When it’s you, there’s less backlash.”

“I— dammit. You’re right.”

“Get to work Superman.” I playfully ordered as I stood up between his legs to stretch my cramped limbs. A giggle my lips as his hand lightly connected with my ass. I felt like a love struck high schooler all over again when I spun around to lean against his strong frame and place my hands on his pecs. “You’ve got some saving to do and for once, it’s not me.”

“Indeed I do.” He mumbled before leaning down to deeply kiss me.

[zehecatl]

rec post for @f-eef that got too long for its own good, and is now just. a general rec post i guess

(as of writing, today is the steam summer sale! writing this before that goes live, so no guarantee everything on here is on sale, but! most of these are older games, so it’s likely. keep them in mind~)

- Iconoclasts my absolute favourite game, ever (along with OFF, but shh), if you check out one game from this list, let it be this one. it’s a genuinely almost flawless package, with gorgeous pixel art, fun gameplay, a really good story, and a cast of characters i just. adore. it’s so so so good, and three years later, i’m still not over it

- The Binding of Isaac so there’s this genre called roguelikes, wherein the whole gimmick is that, when you die, you gotta start from the Very Beginning; and the ‘point’ is getting better and better at the game, until you win! it’s super easy to just, play a few runs (they generally don’t last that long!), and then go on with your day, so it’s a really fun game to just waste time in, if you just wanna chill with some game. and, in my personal opinion, Isaac is the best roguelike game, with so much stuff to unlock, a whole slew of items to play with, and so much content it’s kind of unreal. i definitely think the DLCs are worth picking up, but it’s mostly for more content than like. actually being necessary

- Terraria it’s minecraft, but 2D. unlike MC, it’s got a bit of guidance, which i personally prefer, with bosses to fight and such. an absolutely BLAST with other people too

- A Hat in Time a 3D platformer, ala Mario, that’s just. super charming. it’s also really fun to play. i haven’t actually played the DLC’s, since i played it way back, but i’ve heard good things about Nyakuza Metro, which does look super slick, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

- Slime Rancher you are a slime rancher. you ranch slimes. it’s honestly just wholesome as hell, and just exudes happy vibes. mostly for running around and collecting slimes, ngl

- The Messenger really funky retro game, wherein you play a ninja on a mission. it’s primary draw is definitely in its gameplay, but there’s a surprising amount of story for this kind of genre? i honestly really just like this one. it’s neat

- Underhero you play as a cute minion, who kind of like. managed to kill the hero. and whoops, guess you’re doing his job now? it’s got that undertale vibe, though i’d say it’s less polished than it. HOWEVER, it’s absolutely lovely and it’s climax is REALLY good

- Hatoful Boyfriend bird dating sim. trust me. the ‘secret’ finale route is just. *chef’s kiss* fantastic

- Night in the Woods if you don’t mind having a very poignant sad time, oh my god, i could not recommend NITW more. it perfectly captures that period when you’re done with school, and suddenly your whole life is stretching before you, and you feel so so fucking lost, and overwhelmed and pained with it. it’s just. so good. a sadness worth experiencing 

- Shovel Knight another retro game! this one is, pretty much, the king of the genre, and for very good reasons. the first one (shovel of hope) doesn’t have much story, but the latter ones really add on it. they’re honestly just, really solid games! with funky knight characters!!!

- Hyper Light Drifter man, it’s just a masterpiece. everything about it is perfect. it’s been like, five years, and it’s still one of the very best indie games

- Tell Me Why it’s currently free for june! and it’s a story game! plus, if you like the genre, the devs got the ‘Life Is Strange’ serie(s) to delve into!

- Cat Quest honestly, i just really like this little game. the gameplay is SO much fun, and everything else is just. really charming :’)

- Yoku’s Island Express metroidvania, where you play as a dung-beetle post officer, and the gimmick is that it’s pinball-y! it’s really fun, and very cute and just an all around good time :)

- Owlboy you play as an owl boy! named Otus! and you can fly around, and there’s GORGEOUS pixel graphics, and a neat story, and just. the BEST cast of characters. it’s delightful

- Yuppie Psycho + Count Lucanor just gonna bundle these two together, because they’re both REALLY GOOD. YP is the newer one, and is therefore probably ‘the better one’, but i like them both a ton! they’re 2D horror, but i wouldn’t say they’re that spooky? though that might just be because they’re pixel games! you explore spooky place, and weird stuff happens around you. just a really fun time :)

- Angels of Death my FAVOURITE rpgmaker game, it’s main draw is, a 100%, the main characters and the relationship that develops between them. i just love it a whole lot, and it’s got that lil’ tinge of horror that i, personally, fucking adore. there’s actually an anime based on this, but i haven’t seen it myself!

- Celeste curve ball! it’s a 2D platformer! it’s really good, got a ton of accessibility features, and has like. the tightest gameplay- and, on top of that, surprisingly emotional story! 

- Bastion putting Bastion here, because it’s actually the only one i’ve properly played, but you could probably buy any of the Supergiant Games, and come out satisfied. Bastion is the oldest of the bunch, and is definitely a bit less polished for it, but i personally adore it; the gameplay probably hasn’t aged that well, but i think the story and presentation more than makes up for it

- The Darkside Detective funny point and click adventure, with great wit, and a pair of characters i kind of simply adore. it’s main draw is definitely its humour

- Littlewood very wholesome and chill farming game, that feels more like an RPG than something like stardew valley- i’d not recommend it over SV, but if you want more of SV, Littlewood might scratch that itch!

- Pony Island + The Hex absolutely adore both of these, though if i had to rec only one, it’d probably be Pony Island? they’ve both got that undertale-off vibe, though Pony Island definitely leans harder into it. very interesting plays, both of them

- Oxenfree another horror-ish game! primarily story-focused, but oh boy, what a story! i’m a BIG fan of this game, and the sequel was recently announced too! definitely worth a look if you like ghost shenanigans

- Creature in the Well wasn’t a 100% sure if i should rec this, but beside the finale boss, i really enjoyed my time with this! it’s this weird pinball inspired hack and slash, with some amazing vibes

- Kindergarten 1 + 2 they’re just fun little games okay. the 2nd is much more fleshed out, but the 1st one is really fun too

- the Henry Stickmin collection I JUST... LIKE THESE GAMES A LOT... i think you can find the old versions somewhere on the internet, if you wanna check them out first? idk, they’re fun!

- LIMBO + INSIDE personally, i like INSIDE more, but both of these are classics, and also they’re made by a danish team, and i like them a WHOLE LOT

- The Final Station i could not tell you why i like this game as much as i do, but oh my god. i love this game? it’s got a dying world, neat pixel graphics, big zombie apocalypse vibes, and a weird little story

- Year Walk i love Year Walk :)

- Smile For Me if you liked undertale’s lovely cast of characters, oh boy, you’d likely LOVE this game! it’s really, really, fantastic, and the epilogue (not in the actual game lol) hit me right in the feels

- Pikuniku just a fun little game! there’s not really much there, in the grand scheme of things, but it’s a wonderful little play, one of those games that just sets out to give you a good time, and absolutely success. i like it a lot :’)

- A Short Hike wonderful game, where it’s more about exploring the island than actively finishing the game. it’s real wonderful

- ULTRAKILL ANOTHER CURVEBALL! no idea if you like FPS, but oh my god. ULTRAKILL is so fucking good. just an absolute blast to play. there’s a demo to check out, and i’d definitely recommend it, because if it’s a genre you might like, you’ll love this one (OH also it’s in early access, which means it’s not finished yet! personally, i don’t mind that, especially considering this is more gameplay focused, but ya’ know!)

- My Friend Pedro it’s honestly just really fun to play, and sometimes i still think about the implied lore, and go all !!!!

- Little Misfortune another point and click! this one is pretty short, and is set within the same universe as their other game, Fran Bow, which is much bigger, but idk. i like this one. it’s dark cute

- This Strange Realm of Mine i honestly dunno how to explain this one, because it’s kind of weird and a bit odd, but i really like it, in all its weird poetic glory. it’s neat!

- Donut County you’re a terrible racoon who’s ruined the whole city with holes. it’s great and i love it

- OneShot another ‘gives me undertale vibes’, though this one was in development before UT, if i recall correctly! it’s so good, and it’s got some fantastic meta bits, and i love Niko. i love Niko so much

- Inmost gorgeous vaguely spooky game with a neat story... my favourite genre

- Sayonara Wild Hearts i’d call this more of a spectacle than anything else, but oh my god. what a spectacle it is! the OST is amazing, everything about it just hits right, and even if you suck at the gameplay (which i did), it really doesn’t matter, in my opinion? it’s just great all around!

[livesincerely]

always yours, always mine

Also on Ao3. Rated E.

Disclaimer, this is another A/B/O fic, which I know isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, so feel free to skip over this one if that’s not something you’re into <3

00000

“Okay,” Davey says after the third time one of the boys flinches away from him: Albert, this time, who lets out a panicked yelp and all but tucks and rolls, head over ass, in his attempt to keep Davey from touching him. Given that Davey had only gone to clap a friendly hand on his shoulder while they line up to get their papes, this seems like a drastic overreaction. “What aren’t you all telling me.”

They actually have the gall to look surprised—as though they’ve been anything even approaching subtle in the not-quite fifteen minutes that have passed since Davey arrived in the square—and their guilty, hang-dog expressions might’ve been comical if he wasn’t so annoyed.

“Well?” Davey says, arching an eyebrow, his gaze sweeping over each of them in turn. “What is it?”

Race snatches Albert’s cap off his head and thwaps him with it. “Nice goin’ Albie, you done gave it away!”

“What was I s’pposed’ta do?” Albert says, disgruntled, rubbing his forehead. “Jus’ stand there?”

“No, but you were s’pposed’ta handle it discrete like, dumbass—”

“Oh, sure, ‘cause it’s just that easy—”

“None of you would know discrete if it socked you in the jaw,” Davey cuts in, his hands making their way to his hips as he stares down at them. “Now, what’s going on?”

There’s a long silence as the boys all glance at each other, shifting guiltily, but none of them willing to be the first to break.

Finally, Racetrack sighs. “This was a stupid idea anyway,” he mutters. He rolls his shoulders back and looks Davey straight on, opens his mouth to speak—

Henry elbows him in the side, hissing, “Race! Don’t tell him!”

“Albert already ruined it, we might as well come clean—”

“I didn’t ruin it!” Albert cries.

“You kinda did,” Finch says with a shrug. “You were really obvious, Al.”

"What was I s’pposed to do!”

“I say we just tell him,” Buttons chimes in over Albert’s protests. “Davey’s gonna figure it out eventually—”

“—and he’s gonna be more upset the longer we keep it from him.” Specs adds. Buttons points at him as if to say, yeah, see?

“You just don’t want Davey to be mad at’cha,” Romeo says, accusatory. 

“Do you want Davey to be mad at’cha?”

“....No.”

“I’m gonna tell him,” Race announces to the group at large.

Multiple voices interject all at once, shouts of disagreement and words of encouragement all jumbled together.

“Race, you can’t,”  Crutchie says with a shake of his head, his quieter tones just barely heard beneath the others’ bickering. “Yesterday was bad enough and you heard what Jack said! He doesn’t want to say anything—“

“Yeah, well maybe if Jack wasn’t such a moron, it wouldn’t’ve gotten so bad in the first place—”

“So, this is about Jack, then?” Davey asks, loudly, and the silence that falls is so sudden and absolute that it almost seems to echo.

The boys all look at each other, apprehensive. Then Racetrack blurts, “Jack’s in rut!”

“Jack’s… what?”  Davey says, startled, because out of all the possibilities he’d suspected, this wasn’t anywhere on the list. “I thought he was sick?”

“He didn’t want us to tell you,” Crutchie admits, apologetic. “He didn’t want’cha to know.”

“Jack’s in rut and he wasn’t going to tell me?” Davey says, confused and a little hurt. “But… why?”

“Because he’s an idiot?” Race offers, rolling his eyes. “He wasn’t exactly forthcoming with any typa explanation but he’s probably freaking out about some stupid alpha thing—”

“Hey,” Mush protests weakly. Sniper just shrugs as if to say fair enough. 

“—and he’s been all keyed up since Tuesday, stinking like frenzy and frustration—and not the fun kind,” Racer continues, wrinkling his nose at the memory. “Plus, he can smell you on all’a us when we get back to the Lodging House every evening; he nearly tore Buttons’ arm outta its socket yesterday when he caught your scent on his sleeve, just from wantin’ it so bad.” 

“He didn’t hurt me,” Buttons assures him when Davey looks his way, alarmed. “Nothing like that—you know Jack would never. But he’s driving himself crazy stayin’ away from ya, and havin’ your scent around without you there with it is only makin’ things harder on him.”

“But, why doesn’t he just…” Davey asks, trying to think of a delicate way to say fuck it out, even as something in his chest bares its teeth and snarls at the thought of Jack even considering a rut partner. 

“You’re kiddin’, right?” Race says flatly, thoroughly unimpressed. “Please tell me you’re kiddin’, because I can only deal with one of you bein’ stupid at a time and Jack’s already called dibs on this week.”

“So, what, he’s trying to just wait it out when he knows that I would—“ 

Davey stops himself, flushing. It’s no secret, how he and Jack have been circling each other—teetering on the brink of becoming  more,  just waiting for something to finally give—but he’s reluctant to talk about it too openly, the possibility of him and Jack still feeling oh so fragile where it’s tucked away in the deepest corner of his heart.

Because he’d thought that they were on the same page, thought that there was an unspoken understanding between them that one day, eventually… But if Jack didn’t want him to know about his rut, hadn’t asked Davey to keep him company through his cycle… Davey chews at his lower lip, stomach twisting up in knots.

“Didn’t I just tell you not to be stupid?” Racetrack asks—frowning, but with no real heat to his words—and Davey realizes that his scent has taken on a sour, anxious note as his thoughts spiralled. “You can’t possibly think that he’d want anyone but you riding this out with him.”

“Except, he doesn’t want me there,” Davey points out. “You just said that he didn’t want me to know—”

“Yeah, but not ‘cause he don’t want you,” Racetrack assures him, as though this is plainly obvious. “‘Cause he really, definitely does: he’s puttin’ up with the rest of us ‘cause he loves us and ‘cause he don’t gotta choice since we all live together, but he wants  you.  I think he wants you so bad that it scares him.”

Davey tilts his head, running his tongue over his teeth as he considers Race’s words. But it’s not even a choice that needs contemplating, really, not when it’s Jack.

“I’ll go over and check on him,” Davey decides, a little voice in his head whispering yeshelpprotectfixsoothe. “See if I can convince him to let me help him.”

The boys all sag as one—it’s clear that they hadn’t wanted to go directly against Jack’s orders but are relieved that Davey’s going to step in.

“Thank fuck,” Elmer mutters. “I can’t take anymore of his goddamn pacing.”

“Felt like I was havin’ sympathy pains, watching him prowl around,” Mush agrees, rubbing a hand over his chest like he can feel an ache there. “Don’t know how he’s managed to hold out so long—I can’t imagine tryin’ to get through a cycle without Blink now that we’re together—”

“I’ll handle it,” Davey says, determined, the feeling in his chest crystalizing into something solid and certain and unshakable. 

“We’ll let your folks know where you are,” Crutchie tells him, clapping Davey on the shoulder. “Just go an’ take care of him—god knows he ain’t gonna take care of himself.”

“And don’t let him run you off,” Race advises. “You know how he gets.”

“I’ll handle it,” Davey repeats firmly.

00000

Davey smells Jack before he sees him: the air is heavy with his cedar and summertime scent, undercut with the smoky sweetness of his rut, so potent that Davey almost goes dizzy with it.

“Jack?” he calls out, announcing himself out of politeness rather than any real need—he’s positive that Jack smelt him the moment he arrived. “Jackie?”

The hair on the back of Davey’s neck stands on end, his heart skipping a beat in his chest, and Davey turns just as Jack steps out of a side hallway, his face shadowed with tension.

“You’re not supposed to be here,” Jack rumbles, watching Davey with dark, dark eyes. He’s only wearing a pair of thin sleep pants, his skin dewy with a sheen of sweat, and even from where he stands, Davey can feel the heat rolling off of him in waves.

“Oh?” Davey says, arching an eyebrow. “Because I’m pretty sure this is exactly where I’m supposed to be.”

“Which one of ‘em squealed?” Jack asks with a growl of frustration, raking a hand through his hair. “No, don’t tell me, it was Racer, wasn’t it?”

“Why didn’t you tell me your rut was coming up?” Davey asks, getting right to the point. 

“I didn’t wanna put’cha in that position,” Jack says evasively, gaze falling to the floor.

“And what position would that be?” Davey questions, crossing his arms over his chest.

It takes Jack several seconds to answer. “Didn’t want’cha to feel… obligated or nothin’. Like you hafta be here, like you hafta help me with this, jus’ ‘cause we’re...”

“I don’t understand,” Davey says, watching him carefully, a spark of realization starting to dawn. “How is this any different than you helping me through my heat last month?”

Jack’s spine stiffens, tension thrumming through him like a live wire, but he lets it go just as quickly as it arrived. 

“Come on, Davey,” Jack says, voice heavy, his mouth pressed in a thin, unhappy line across his face. “You know what I mean. You know why it’s different.”

“Sweet, stubborn, overprotective alpha,” Davey murmurs with a sad sigh, shaking his head. “Jackie, you’re not going to lose control and go wild just because you’re in rut, it doesn’t actually work like that—”

“Are you sure?” Jack says darkly. “Are you absolutely positive? ‘Cause I’m feelin’ pretty fuckin’ outta control, here, Dave. Feels like I might bust outta my skin any second, my instincts are goin’ goddamn nuts, I can barely sleep, can barely keep my fuckin’ head on straight, and there’s this hollow, empty spot between my lungs that aches every time I breathe, and I can’t— I can’t—”

“Jack,” Davey says, low and soothing. “You have to stop fighting your instincts. I know you think you’re protecting me by holding yourself back, but I promise that there’s nothing to worry about. Let me help you, darling. Please?”

Jack wavers—not like he’s convinced, not like he’s found any sort of faith in himself, but like he no longer has the strength to keep arguing—and that more than anything has the alarm bells going off in the back of Davey’s mind.

“Jack,” Davey beckons, soft but firm. “Jackie, love, come here.”

Jack takes a stumbling, hesitant step forward. Davey meets him halfway and draws him into a tight embrace, one arm wrapped securely around Jack’s middle, the other guiding Jack’s head to rest against the curve of his throat. 

Jack’s hands settle cautiously against the small of his back, his nose tucked right against Davey’s scent gland. He takes in a single, shaky breath, then crumples like a puppet that’s had its strings cut, that salty, bitter note of distressed alpha finally fading from his scent.

“Dave,” Jack whines, snuffling desperately at his neck. “Davey.”

“I know, Jackie,” Davey murmurs, hugging him even tighter. “I’m here, I’ve got you.”

They stand like that for several minutes, just holding each other—Davey pressing gentle kisses to the top of Jack’s head while Jack clings to him, relaxing more and more with every inhale. 

“Can you look at me for a second, love?” Davey asks, craning back as much as he can without letting go. Jack grumbles but obediently tilts his head back—now that they’re closer, Davey can see that his eyes are glassy with fever, his skin flushed beneath his tan. “When’s the last time you ate something? Or had anything to drink?”

“I dunno,” Jack says, shrugging. “A while, I guess. H’ven’t been keepin’ track.”

“Let’s get some food and water into you, okay?” Davey says. “You’ll feel better once you’ve eaten.”

Davey leads Jack along the hallway and down a set of stairs into the basement, following the traces of Jack’s scent in the air to find wherever he’s been hunkered down for his rut. 

He quickly discovers what must be the Lodging House’s cycle room. It’s cold, cramped, and uncomfortable, not a hint of carpet or wood or  anything  to cover the wall-to-ceiling concrete that encloses the space, and Davey’s heart aches at the thought of Jack waiting out his cycle here, alone, for these last couple days.

He takes stock of the room: there's a wooden bed frame with a lumpy mattress pushed up against one of the walls, covered in a plastic mattress protector and made up with a cheap set of sheets that are stale with sweat, and a single threadbare blanket to go with it—no pillows. There’s a loaf of bread and a jar of peanut butter sitting on a table in the corner, a mostly full pitcher of water and a glass next to it, and there’s a stack of towels and linens tucked underneath the table with a wash basin.

“Think you can eat something?” Davey asks.

Jack shrugs again but doesn’t answer. Davey decides to interpret this as a  yes. 

“Sit down for me, darling,” he says, making quick work of fixing Jack a peanut butter sandwich and a glass of water. 

Jack hovers close for a second, then finds a spot right on the floor, leaning with his back against the far wall. 

“Go ahead and eat this for me,” Davey instructs, handing over the food. Jack accepts it from him by route, but makes no move to actually take a bite. “Jackie, please. You need to eat something.”

“‘M not hungry,” he mutters.

“I know you aren’t, but that’s just the rut talking,” Davey says, running a hand gently along his arm. “You’ll feel differently once you’ve got some food in your stomach.”

Though he’s clearly not thrilled about it, Jack manages to choke down half of his sandwich and two glasses of water. Once that’s taken care of, Davey starts stripping the dirty sheets off the bed, piling them into the corner to be washed later, then remakes it with a fresh set.

“Do you want to try laying down for a while?” Davey asks as he finishes, smoothing away a wrinkle near one of the mattress corners. “You said you haven’t been sleeping well—”

“I think you need to leave,” Jack interrupts, the words coming out in a low, gravelly rasp. 

Davey goes very, very still, a sudden flare of heat prickling low in his stomach. 

He slowly turns around. Jack rises to his feet with all the grace and power of a jungle cat, his eyes shaded dark with hunger and his scent burning like a wildfire, staring at Davey like he might devour him whole, the air between them growing heated as the next wave of his rut kicks in. 

Davey barely resists a whimper, his own scent spiking sugar-sweet in response as desire pulses through him. He wants to rub himself all along Jack’s front, until that smoky-spicy-cedar scent is imprinted into his skin. Wants to lick the taste of it right out of Jack’s mouth.

“David,” Jack growls. His eyes are scorching. “You gotta go, sweetheart. You gotta leave right now.”

Davey swallows around a suddenly dry throat, his tongue feeling heavy in his mouth, but his voice is remarkably steady when he says, “What if I don’t want to leave?”

Now it’s Jack’s turn to stiffen. “Davey,” he says sharply. “I know you’re tryin’ to help, but trust me, this ain’t like your heats. You don’t wanna be here for this.”

“You haven’t actually asked me if I want to be here for this,” Davey points out, taking a single step forward. Jack’s hands ball into fists at his sides. “You’ve just assumed that I don’t.”

“Because you don’t understand how—” Jack’s jaw snaps shut as he cuts himself off, expression tight.

“Answer me this then,” Davey says when Jack doesn’t continue, stepping closer and closer until they’re standing toe to toe, chest to chest. Jack’s nostrils flare, the muscles in his arms tensing and flexing, and that mouth watering scent spikes even stronger. “Do you want me, Jackie?”

“Of course I want’cha,” Jack groans, and one of those big, hot hands finally curls around Davey’s waist—not pulling him any closer, really, but like Jack just can’t help himself. “What kinda question is that? This ain’t about not wantin’ ya.”

“Then why is it so hard for you to believe that I want you too?” Davey asks. “That I want you like this? That I want everything you’re willing to give me?”

“You don’t know what you’re askin’ for,” Jack insists, stubborn. Davey would admire his dedication if it wasn’t so exasperating. “I’m— I can’t control myself as well when I’m in rut, I get rough, possessive—”

Davey rolls his eyes. 

“You’re my alpha, Jackie,” he says dryly. “Possessive kind of comes with the territory.”

Jack’s eyes go wide. Two seconds later, Davey realizes what he’s said: this is the first time either of them have openly acknowledged what they are to each other, and voicing it aloud, saying it so plainly… something in Davey’s chest thrums with energy, with  connection.

“You... “ Jack’s throat works for a moment. “You think of yourself as mine?”

“Jackie, I’ve always been yours,” Davey says, cupping his hands around Jack’s face, so true and so tender that he aches with it. “And, I think you’ve always been mine.”

Jack pulls one of Davey’s hands away from his face and curls his own around it, pressing a kiss to Davey’s knuckles, then to his palm, and then to the inside of his wrist, his gaze growing more heated with each one. 

“Mine,” Jack growls, a hint of teeth scraping against Davey’s pulse as he pulls away. “You’re mine.”

“Yours,” Davey breathes. “All yours.”

Jack’s eyes flash red, then he’s drawing Davey in for a hard, demanding kiss, pressing a thigh between the hot space between Davey’s legs. Davey gasps at the first brush of Jack’s lips against his neck, the slide of Jack’s hands shifting down to palm at his ass, his fingers digging into the swell of Jack’s biceps for purchase. 

“Take these off,” Jack growls, yanking Davey’s shirt out from where it’s tucked into his pants. “Take them off before I tear them off you.”

Davey fumbles for the buttons on his shirt, liquid heat pooling low in his stomach. Jack’s hands trail greedily at every bit of his skin as he uncovers it, thoroughly distracting and too good to ignore, and after several minutes of scrabbling, interspersed with long, frenzied kisses, they eventually manage to get their clothes off. 

“Bed, cielito,” Jack says. “We need to— Bed.”

Davey hums in acknowledgment but doesn’t move, his face buried against Jack’s shoulder, biting at the skin there until it bruises.

“Dave,” Jack tries again.

“I’m busy,” Davey mumbles, mouthing at the sharp line of Jack’s collarbones.

“And I’m about two seconds away from pushing you down and fucking you right through the floor,” Jack says, voice laden with promise. “So get on the goddamn bed.”

“I really don’t see what the issue is,” Davey teases, still not moving an inch. “The floor is closer, isn’t it?”

Jack snarls, curling a hand around Davey’s nape and pulling him back up into another frenzied kiss.

“Mouthy— little— smartass—“ he pants, his teeth dragging along the tendon in Davey’s throat. “I’m gonna eat you out ‘til you cry.”

He wraps his hands under Davey’s thighs and hoists him up and back. Davey lands on the mattress with a soft bounce, barely given any time to situate himself before Jack is on top of him, pinning him down with rough hands and spreading him wide before following through with his threat, tongue lapping at Davey’s entrance in broad, greedy strokes.

“Ah,”  Davey gasps, fingers tight in Jack’s hair, scrabbling for some kind of anchor as Jack licks him open.

Jack lets out a low rumble of approval that vibrates right against where he’s most sensitive, his body growing even wetter, even slicker at the sound and feel of it. Jack swirls his tongue around his opening, making Davey’s toes curl against Jack’s sides, then presses in—Davey cries out, a harsh, desperate sound that tears out of him as he grinds up into the sensation.

“Jack,” he gasps, mindless, hips jerking uselessly in Jack’s unrelenting hold, body pulled taut and stretched loose at the same time, pleasure coiling in his belly. “Jack, I’m— I can’t—”

One particularly filthy swipe of Jack’s tongue has Davey’s breath hitching in his chest, head thrown back as the feelings swell and crest, and it only takes one more teasing flick before Davey’s coming with a broken moan.

“Jack,” he croaks when his lungs reinflate. “Holy shit.”

Jack’s mouth and chin are shiny with slick, his pupils blown wide and shaded with satisfaction. 

“Told you,” he says smugly. 

Davey tugs him down into another messy kiss, needing to lick that handsome smirk off his face. Then he rears up and flips them over so that he’s the one on top now, kneeling over Jack with his legs straddling Jack’s lap.

“My turn,” Davey murmurs, reaching down and taking Jack’s length—thick and hard and wet at the tip—in hand, lining it up at his entrance.

Then he takes a breath, leans back, and sinks down onto it in one slow, smooth downstroke. 

“Mmn,” Davey sighs, his eyes slipping shut as his body adjusts to the stinging stretch of finally being filled. He’s thrumming with tension, with heat, his thighs quivering where they’re spread wide around Jack’s hips, hands splayed against Jack’s chest for leverage, and it feels so good he could almost choke on the pleasure of it. 

Jack’s hands flex jerkily against Davey’s sides, then go wonderfully, bruisingly tight, thumbs pressing hard against the divots of his hips.

“Fuck, Davey,” he groans, staring up at Davey with dark eyes tinged with red, lovely and wanting. “You’re gorgeous, sweetheart. So fucking gorgeous and absolutely perfect for me.”

“For you,” Davey agrees, grinding down in a tight, deliberate circle, ass flush against the cradle of Jack pelvis, and Jack’s scent burns even brighter, smoky and sweet. “And you’re all mine, aren’t you darling?”

“Always,” Jack promises.

Davey rises up then drops back down, carefully at first but quickly finding his rhythm, rocking his hips in a  steady back and forth motion that sends liquid fire sparking up his spine. Every slip and drag of Jack’s dick inside of him feels like being shaken apart and pieced back together all at once, aching desire coursing through him with every slap of skin against skin.

“Davey,” Jack pants, his hips bucking up to meet Davey’s own as he rolls down again, and Davey moans through the bursts of bliss that explode behind his eyelids. “Oh, fuck, that’s good.”

“Jack,” Davey gasps, leaning forward to tuck his nose against Jack’s neck, nipping at his pulse point as he grinds down in his lap, the scent of summer and cedar and mate, mate, mate anchoring him even as he goes a little scent drunk on how  right  it all is. “Jackie, I— oh, yes, just like that.”

Jack pulls him down into the next thrust, hard and fast, and Davey cries out, twisting his hip as he sinks into it. 

“Perfect,” Jack grunts, those hot, rough hands squeezing tight. “God, Davey, you look absolutely incredible. So fucking pretty, sweetheart, feel so good riding my cock.”

Davey works his hips that much faster at the praise, so much so that the bed starts rocking underneath them, the squeaky creak of the wooden frame echoing through the room in time with his own heaving breaths. He’s so wet now that he can hear Jack fucking him, hears the slick, dirty squelch of Jack’s knot pressing a little deeper inside of him every time they clash together, driving closer and closer to completion.

“Harder,” Davey pleads, his thighs burning from the effort of keeping up his pace but still needing more. “Jack, please—fuck, alpha, please—harder.”

Jack snarls—a low, rumbling, dangerously sexy sound—and his eyes bleed red, his scent washing over Davey like blazing fire. He leverages his legs up, bending them at the knee with his feet flat against the mattress, and when he thrusts up into Davey on the next roll of his hips, it feels so impossibly good that Davey’s mouth falls open around a broken, guttural little keen.

“O-oh,” Davey says, the word catching in his throat, barely able to think with how completely and utterly Jack is destroying him, his knot starting to thicken and swell against his rim as their bodies meet again and again. Davey arches his back, planting a hand against one of Jack’s bent knees for balance, chasing blindly after his pleasure, and Jack makes a noise like he’s going out of his damn mind, a possessive growl tearing its way out of his throat. “Oh fuck.”

“Say it again,” Jack orders, eyes on fire.

It falls out of Davey’s mouth, desperate and true: “Alpha, alpha, my alpha—”

“My omega,” Jack says, his voice low and gritty, rut and desire clouding his gaze. “Mine.”

They’re both teetering on the edge. Jack’s knot is catching on every thrust, fucking him open in torturous, delicious increments, and Davey wants, wants,  wants.

“Jack,” Davey’s head hangs heavy between his shoulders, his lower lip caught between his teeth as he pants and sighs. “Jackie, yes, give it to me, give it to me, please, yes—”

Jack’s hands slide lower, clench harder, and Davey has one second to delight in how much he loves the feel of those big hands curled around him before the world spins and he lands flat on his back again with Jack braced above him, his eyes wild and vivid red. He grabs the backs of Davey’s thighs and pushes his knees up towards his ears, hardly faltering at all before he’s driving back inside again, fast and hard and so, so deep, and Davey’s boiling, blistering from the feeling of Jack, always Jack, pulsing inside of him, etched right into the seams of his heart.

“Mine,” Jack growls again, nipping viciously at the base of Davey’s throat, tongue swirling over his scent gland like he’s already trying to taste his claim. Davey tilts his head back with a needy whine, unable to do anything except offer himself up to him, freely and wholly. “Mate. Mine.”

“Jack,” Davey whimpers. “Jack, I— I’m—”

“You’re going to come for me,” Jack orders, pistoning his hips even harder, and the new angle means that he’s tagging that sweet spot inside on every other thrust, fierce and relentless. 

“Yes,” Davey moans, sparks flying at the edges of his vision. “Yes, I’m— Don’t stop, don’t stop, please don’t—”

Jack presses him down, snaps his hips forward, sharp, and his knot finally catches, swells, and locks inside of him. Heat thrums, then surges through him, white hot, at the searing stretch of it and Davey comes so hard he goes lightheaded, body rippling and writhing through wave after wave of pleasure. Jack manages a couple more filthy grinds of his hips before he’s tumbling over the edge right after him, capturing Davey’s mouth in a breathless, bruising kiss as his orgasm rocks through them both.

When he feels like he can move his limbs again, Davey lets his legs slip down to wrap around Jack’s waist, looping his arms loosely around Jack’s neck. He turns his face towards Jack’s temple and inhales, smiling softly when he catches the smoky, spicy, cooling-embers scent of a sated, happily exhausted alpha.

“How are you feeling, darling?” Davey murmurs, brushing Jack’s sweaty hair off his forehead with a gentle touch. “Alright?”

Jack mouths something unintelligible against his collarbone, a solid, grounding weight sprawled bonelessly on top of him. Davey cups his hand around the nape of Jack’s neck, then strokes soothingly down his back, his mind a wash of hazy contentment. 

“‘M good,” Jack grunts. “I’m… fuck, Dave.”

Davey huffs out a laugh, then presses a kiss to the high point of Jack’s cheek. “Fuck,” he echoes hoarsely, still recovering from his high.

“You?” Jack asks, nuzzling clumsily at the column of Davey’s throat. “Feelin’ okay?”

“Better than,” Davey decides, his body aching deliciously around the hot, hard knot pressed inside of him, stomach sticky with with own release, his thighs wet with slick and come, neck littered with marks, the air thick with their combined scents, spring and citrus and cedar and sweet  melded perfectly together, and he feels totally, entirely, completely— “Feel claimed.”

Jack’s body twitches, his knot throbbing as he spills another burst of pleasure deep inside of him. Davey hums, pleased, some base omega instinct purring with satisfaction at how wonderfully full he is.

“Jesus, sweetheart,” Jack eventually gets out, voice rough and raspy and  wrecked.  “You can’t just— Have mercy on your poor alpha.”

“My alpha,” Davey agrees. “All mine.”

[code-otome-game]

Completed otome games, my thoughts, along with my fav characters (last updated: August 22nd 2021)

1. Code Realize - August 2021

Saint-Germain instantly caught my eye, along with Lupin ofc. I was curious about Impey but my friend who lent me her collection of otome games said he was shit. Code Realize was my reintroduction to otome games, and plummeted me into otome hell once more. As soon as I saw Herlock Sholmes, I wanted him as a route, and loved his Future Blessings route.

Saint Germain was my absolute favourite, and his route hurt me in all the right ways. His VA was amazing at conveying the emotion behind certain scenes.

2. Café Enchanté - August 2021

After completing Code Realize, I felt a little lost and didn't know what game to play next. I figured after the pain of some of the stuff in Code Realize, I'd go for something I thought would be a little more fun and a little lighter. Cafe Enchante was next on my list. I was instantly drawn to Misyr and Il, with Il being my first route. I absolutely loved Il, and was traumatized from having my fav boy be the one who was hurt the most again. Although, Misyr is definitely a top contender for most hurt fav as well...

3. Piofiore - August 2021

I continued on with Piofiore right after Cafe Enchante, and instantly knew I was interested in Dante and Yang. I went with Dante first, and was absolutely enamored by him. I was absolutely heartbroken to find out that I didn't get his best ending at first, and contemplated not playing the game for a while. But I decided against it and carried on, using a guide this time. I didn't think anyone else would surpass him in my mind, but boy was I wrong. I quickly fell in love with Yang once I started his route, and his route was the first to make me feel butterflies again in years since I played my last otome game.

However, after playing through all the routes and getting to the finale, I absolutely fell in love with Henri, and I'm honestly shocked that Nicola has left such an impression on me considering I didn't think much of him right after his route. Now it's hard *not* to think about him. But overall, I love all the men pretty equally. I'm super excited for 1926.

4. Collar x Malice - August 2021

I was definitely curious about this one and was tempted to start it multiple times when choosing which game to play next, however I put it off because I didn't like the protagonist being a cop.

The characters are honestly all super loveable, and I think I love them all a bit more equally then I do the Piofiore guys. I was surprised Saeki wasn't a route, until while I was playing Kei or Shiraishi's route when my friend spoiled he was Adonis' leader.

I fell in love with all the characters quite gradually through their stories, with the exception of Shiraishi. I knew he'd be the one I was the most curious and interested in. I was so excited when I finally unlocked his route, and I absolutely loved every single bit of the early half of it. His comments and interactions were hilarious, he was adorable *and* hot.... and he loves cats. What the hell more could I want from a guy? He makes me want to introduce him to my own cats and also makes me want to do mundane and sweet things with him just because he's so sweet and I love him.

I was absolutely heartbroken at his "best" ending, and thinking about his tragic ending hurts my heart. I legitimately only want the best for this man- I only want him to be happy and healthy and not confined to some stupid prison or Adonis...

It also feels strange, but I think I love him best *before* he got a little soft with the protagonist? His quick retorts and harsh comments were hilarious and I loved that so much about him, so I was a bit sad when he grew a bit soft later on.

At the time of writing these past 4 entries, CxM is the latest game I've played, so Shiraishi's story is still super fresh in my mind. I was as obsessed with most of the other men mentioned above as I am with him right now. I'm sure the following entries will contain more love-ramblings like this as I complete more games and add them to the list.

5. Amnesia: Memories - August/September 2021

Toma! Toma! Toma!!!

My first experience with ✨ the cage ✨. I went with Ikki at first, got his normal ending (thaT SHIT WAS SO SAD WTF ;-;) and then went back with a walkthrough for his good ending. But... his route was kinda underwhelming tbh. I liked it as I played it, but looking back now... it really was quite underwhelming. So was Shin's route, who I played after Toma. I was interested in who the culprit was, and was shocked with the reveal tbh. Buuut after playing Toma's route... it was understandable. Although I really wish that Shin's route had more affection in it... it felt more like a mystery with a little bit of romance rather then an otome game.

I played Toma's route after Ikki's, and omfg... Toma was truly an unexpected fav. Hated his good ending tho, idfk why you would be ok with just returning to normal after all of that... but whatever. I would willingly go in that cage I s2g. I LOVED his eyes too! When he gets dark and super possessive, those eyes are just... UGH. Yes please. ❤

I skipped the entirety of Kent's route because I really just don't give a fuck about him. Hes absolutely not my type. I felt bad skipping it, but... in the end I don't really care.

Ukyo was also an unexpected fav- I wad super curious about his route and suspected that all of the "interesting" and bad stuff that I had heard about would happen during his route buuuut... nope. Nothing of the sort. He was so damn sweet, but I will say that uh... insane side of him is kinda hot too. 👀 but omg, the fact that he's a photographer AND so damn dedicated to you and sweet is just... ugh. My heart. Ukyo and Toma definitely became my favs for this game, and I think this is the first time where my first route didn't end up being one of my favourites.

I love how sharp Toma is as well! That he knows so much about you and can easily find out things and such... but also- I really like how dedicated and caring Ukyo is. He's so protective and adorable! I really did feel bad for him during his route. I haven't gotten his normal ending yet, but the title of it is so fucking sad and I don't know if I even wanna go for it.

"Do you know Ukyo?"

6. Bustafellows - September 2021

Honestly, when I started playing Bustafellows I didnt expect to like many characters, if any at all. None of them were particularly appealing to me, at least visually... however, as I played the game, I was drawn to Shu and Mozu, as I found Shu to be the most attractive one of the bunch, and Mozu was interesting to me as a coroner. However, the first character I ended up with was... Crow. I was honestly a little surprised, but didn't care too much. I didn't know who I wanted to go with first, and honestly, as the common route progressed... I found myself liking Crow more.

Crow was the one I liked the least out of everyone, at least visually at first. I really didn't like his hair lmao. But as I read the common route, he really grew on me, and I couldn't help but be sweet to him, so ofc I ended up with his route first... and god, I really love him. He's so stupid and adorable. Like seriously.

I went with whoever the game would give me after Crow, and it gave me Helvetica. With Crow, I really loved his character, but didn't care much for his story. It was the opposite for Helvetica. I enjoyed his story a ton, but not his character. I then carried on with Shu, who I loved entirely. Both his character and story was really really good, and his bad ending... phew. Damn dude.

Mozu came after, and I honestly have mixed feelings about his route. I feel like there really needed to be more romance between him and the MC, but the end of his route where he finds his sister is.... oof. I literally went "thats rough buddy" in my head lmao. I felt so bad for him.

I liked Limbo a lot more then I thought I would as well! He was super adorable and sweet, and the story was pretty good too, so I really enjoyed his route. But overall, I believe Shu and Crow are my favs this time around. I can't believe I didn't like Mozu as much as I thought I would! But I feel like I would have liked him a shitton more if there was more to his route then there was.... smh.

Nightshade - September 2021

I almost immediately jumped right into Nightshade, although with doubts of enjoying it in my mind, as I wasnt in the mood for a historical japan setting. However! I loved the characters, and the story! By the end of it, I was thoroughly angry with the antagonists for hurting my BOYS like that...

The first one I went for was Kuroyuki, who I LOVED. I felt a little bit confused throughout his route, but I still quite enjoyed it. A sweet yandere. Babey boy. I love him.

Next was Chojiro, and oooohhhhh boy.... yeah. That was a little rough. BUT I feel like the story was very well suited for him!!! After that I went with Goemon, who was SO SWEET. For a moment, the "plot twist" had me, but then I realized there was no way he was wasn't trying to trick his old clan/the council.

Hanzo was second last, and definitely an unexpected fav! I didnt find him very attractive at first, but seeing him more and more throughout the routes had him growing on me. And I LOVED him! But... I don't like Ieyasu's treatment towards the end of the route; ordering Hanzo to kill the MC after making us thoroughly believe he was a kind man in every other route.... sigh. But I'm happy that he was able to take just the MC's sash instead of her head. I do like that he also told Hanzo to "go get a wife and come back" hehe.

GOD that scene in the cave with Hanzo where youre both naked... YES. And his hair when its wet!!! Hes so adorable AND hot at the same time???? I love Hanzo. Tbh, I love all of them.

Gekka was the last one I did, but I wish I reversed Hanzo/Gekka's positions. Cause I really, *really* didnt like ending on such a sad ending.... dear god. I really thought I got the bad end or something for a hot minute there. Then Gekka comes in! Ahhhh, honestly I didn't like him much at all at first which is why I saved him for last, but his route.... FUCK man. His route was heart wrenching. And he's so damn sweet. I still don't understand how/why he doesn't try to kill the MC in the other routes after the "protection" "curse" is lifted but whatever. Still, the ending... dear god. And all of their graves being dug up... the box of everyone's hair... jesus christ that was morbid. Even that made me mad. I didnt care much for the blonde haired kid who died first, but everyone else after that had such a good part to the story...but I wonder why Kuroyuki lived in every route?

Either way, Nightshade was a lot better then I thought it would be! I loved it!!! I honestly might go back soon and replay Kuroyuki's route now that I know whats going on and I know the characters.... also wanna replay Hanzo's route! Babey ❤

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: F*** Your Contract {One-Shot}*

Henry Cavill x Famous Reader

Warning: Cursing, Angst, NSFW, Mild Smut, 

Words: 3.1k

Summary: Reader is a successful actress in her own right and has been in a relationship with Henry for the last year. The relationship has been difficult to maintain because the two of you are always on opposite sides of the globe with little to no time to spare for the other. Henry makes a surprise visit out to the set of your sci-fi movie only to find you in a situation he did not expect.

 ***Loosely Edited/Proofread***

🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊

“I miss you so bloody much.”

 You leaned back on the couch you were sitting in and sighed as you rested your head on your hand that was braced on the back of the couch.

 “I miss you too baby.” Henry groaned as he leaned back on the headboard of his bed. He looked amazing. Henry rubbed his chest and your eyes dropped to his very hairy chest. You loved it. your eyes ravaged him slowly. You didn’t even realize when your teeth sunk into your bottom lip.

 “Don’t look at me like that love, please.”

 You smiled and shook your head. “Can’t take it?”

 Henry laughed loudly and you smiled at his full-on smile, the one that showed almost all of his teeth. You called it his dork smile. It was one of those smiles that looked like it should come with a snort. You loved it more than anything.

 “I think you know the answer to that. It’s been what, two months?”

 “Almost.”

 He groaned and hit his head back on the headboard, sank down just a bit then bit his bottom lip. “Wanna go in the bedroom?” You snorted from the way he rose his eyebrows. It gave him the most delightful mischievous look. A look you knew he gave plenty of times as a boy.

 “Why?”

“Well, I just thought you’d want to get more comfortable as you get more naked.”

 Again, you laughed loudly and shook your head. “I don’t know what kind of woman you think I am, but I don’t just get named over FaceTime. There has to be a reason.”

 Henry pouted and gave you the sad puppy dog eyes. You almost felt sorry for him—almost.

 “I thought helping out your poor, lonely, affection, attention and love deprived boyfriend get through the next month or two of separation would be something you’d be open to.”

 You gave a look as if you were thinking about it. “Hmm, okay, I mean it doesn’t sound like a bad job, but there is just one thing. If I go in that bedroom, get naked and comfortable for my poor, lonely, affection, attention and love deprived boyfriend; what’s in it for me?”

 The camera slowly scanned his muscular bare chest down to his impressively defined abs. your jaw dropped as you gawked at his beauty. He was gorgeous, he knew it and you knew it. for a brief second the camera fell to his lap where you saw a noticeable bulge that made your mouth water. The next thing you saw was Henry’s face which was decorated with a smirk. He knew just what he did.

 “Yep. Going to the bedroom now.”

 You got up from the couch and made your way through your hotel room to the bedroom. Once inside you arranged the pillows at the foot of the bed and placed your iPad before them using them as a wall to angle the device. When you climbed in you adjusted it to ensure he had the perfect view.

 “There you are beautiful.” His smile was the best thing you’d ever seen, and it reminded you how much you loved him.

 The night was spent using FaceTime for just what it was meant for—human connection of the most intimate kind.

 Two weeks later the two of you had barely had any time to make your planned FaceTime dates. His filming schedule picked up and yours went haywire. You missed him. The number of times the two of you missed each other with your attempts to talk was crazy, either you were asleep when he called or he was in the middle of a scene, or even the service connection was bad thanks to him being on location. You both were getting antsy to see the other.

 “Is your head in the game Y/N?” You shook your head and looked at your costar Tyler whose smile was wide. He was a cutie.

 “Hey Tyler, yeah. Is yours? The most intense scene of the movie.”

 He shrugged then fanned you off. “Eh, not that intense for me, more so for you. I have the easy part.”

 He was right. You looked around at the six crew members that would be the only assigned for the particular scene that was being filmed. You’d done a very good job of compartmentalizing things. It was a job and nudity wasn’t really a big deal for you. you shrugged.

 “Eh, it’s just boobs.” Tyler laughed and nodded.

 “You’re right, just boobs. No big deal. We’ve all sucked one.”

 You laughed louder and pinched your lips trying to stop.

 “See, that’s the spirit. A guy like you has sucked more than one I’m sure, just add mine to the list.”

When you first read that there was nudity in the movie you never once hesitated with wanting the role. It was a good script, a chance to work with a great director and you knew the film would do well on release. A minute tops of nudity was no big deal; Emelia Clarke was fully nude for one or more of her scenes in Game of Thrones and she handled it like a boss and looked amazing.

 “All right Y/N, Tyler. Ready?”

 You stood and nodded along with Tyler and walked to the set that was made up for the scene. When Tyler took off his robe he wore a modesty cloth that covered his unmentionables but showed off just how buff he was. You could tell why some girls went crazy over him; you though were immune. You loved, wanted and craved only one man.

Tyler took his place and soon you did as well right on his lap. As you waited for everyone to take their places you got into the mindset of your character for the scene. “I’m sorry,” Tyler began.

 “What? For what?”

 “I know we’re both professionals and can get through this but I’m sorry for what I’m about to do, just the principle.”

 You smirked and nodded. “Apology accepted.”

 “All right, ready Y/N?” You nodded and untied the robe you wore. One of the set workers approached and peeled it off just as you covered your breasts.

 “All right, in 3, 2, 1.”

 At one, you lowered your hands in prep for action and began the scene. Your lips meet in a passionate kiss which prompts both of you to moan. Tyler’s hand raises to your back and claws down your skin to stop at the flesh just before the swell of your ass. You begin grinding on his lap. Suddenly Tyler stands and holds you against him in the air easily supporting your weight. He then plops you on the desk. His lips leave your lips to trail to your neck before kissing along your collar bone. You drop your back onto the desk and arch giving the view of a bridge. You look directly into the camera that is in front of the desk and play up the pleasure your character was supposed to be feeling.

 Just off to the side, you saw Henry watching. The pit of your stomach fell and that was when Tyler cupped your breasts in his hands and dropped his mouth to one of your nipples. Fuck, you thought. The tight clench of Henry’s jaw was hard to miss. He was angry. Closing your eyes, you tried to blot out the image of him in your head and stay in character and in the scene. Tyler moved to your other breast and nipple and you hugged his head to your chest. That was when the rocking started that was to imitate the motions of sex. You panted and moaned as you raked your nails across his back. Tyler kept one hand on your breast as he lost himself to the character and the scene.

 When you heard “cut” Tyler grabbed a robe from one of the set workers and covered you first. “Thanks.”

 When you sat up Henry was gone. Panic raised in you. “Uh—can we take ten or fifteen please?”

 “Sure, Y/N. Prep for scene thirty-four.” You nodded and scooted off the desk while putting on the robe. You hurried to your slippers and quickly walked off the set and looked around. You didn’t see him anywhere. He could have left and after nearly ten minutes you began to think he had. when you opened your trailer door and stepped inside there he was with his back turned. you didn’t know if you should run and throw your arms around him and tell him how much you missed him and loved him or apologize profusely.  Before you made a decision he turned and the anger in his eyes was so clear that you knew this was the beginning of a fight.

 “What the bloody hell Y/N!”

 “Calm down,” you began.

 “Calm down? You’re kidding me. I just walked in on you having sex with your co-star.”

 “Sex, really Henry that’s a big exaggeration.”

 “Is it? Your nipples were in his mouth, his hands were on your breasts. What the fuck was that?”

 You hadn’t gotten around to going into detail about the sex scene. When you told him about the movie you mentioned there was a sex scene but eluded that it was a mild one.

 “That was anything but mild. That was porn!” He was angry and you knew his anger was rising.

 “Okay I’m sorry, I should have been straight with you about how graphic the scene was. I just knew it would make you uncomfortable.”

 “Uncomfortable would be knowing you’re filming a sex scene; this was way past uncomfortable. Do you know what it feels like to see that?”

 You took a few steps to him, but he stepped aside not allowing you near him. “No. you are not going to try to make this go away like you do everything. Do you know what it feels like?”

 “Henry, this is my job. It’s your job too. I don’t go off the rails when you have to shoot scenes like this. I’m sure in The Witcher has scenes like this, I’ve played the video game and I was at the screening for the first season.”

 “That is completely different. I told you everything about that. I gave you a play by play of what to expect. You were not left wondering anything or surprised by anything. That—that was a surprise Y/N!”

 “It’s in my contract,” you blurted out.

 “Fuck your contract!” His voice boomed off the walls of your trailer and you knew whoever passed could hear.

 He was right. You should have told him. you didn’t expect him to be in the audience watching. You didn’t expect to see him for another few weeks. How were you supposed to prepare for him to walk in? You sighed, closed your eyes and tried to think of a way to make this better. When you looked at him you could see how furious he was. There were levels to Henry’s anger. There was being bothered, being annoyed, pissed, angry and downright seething. He was seething.

 Slowly you approached him as if walking to a skittish deer who would bolt at any second. You had to take this slow if you had any hope of smoothing this over.

“Baby,” you softly began getting closer. When you were a few inches from him you stopped. It was a strategy.

 “Look, I know I should have told you exactly what the scene was, I should have, and I didn’t. I’m sorry.” Slowly his eyes met yours, he searched yours for any hint of a lie.

 “Is there something going on with you and him?”

 “What! No. Oh my god, no baby. Tyler and I are just friends, costars. There is nothing there. You and me, we’re real.” You closed the space between you and clasped his face in your hands. “You mean everything to me. You and only you. I love you, Henry.”

 It killed you that this one omission had him questioning you. “Tell me you get that.” He shook his head and stepped back from you, again creating space.

 “Y/N, I—I can’t be here right now. You’re touching me and I hear your words, I do, but I can’t just forget what I saw.”

 You stepped closer again, it had him stumbling back to sit on the couch there. You took the opportunity to straddle him and press your lips to his in the same breath. He moaned and tried to push you away but instead, he pulled you closer and intensified the kiss. Soon his lips were battling yours and his tongue was wrestling yours into obedience. Your moans mingled together, and chaos ensued with the both of you ripping layer after layer of clothing from his body. When he was finally naked he pushed the robe off of you and threw you over the couch. You panted in anticipation for what you knew was to come.

Henry slammed into you pulling a scream from your throat. It had been months since you’d been together like this. He didn’t wait for you to adjust to him, he snapped his hips forward again and set the pace early letting you know just what this was. He was angry, he was trying to get it out but wrestled with his love and need for you. when you tried to throw your backside back onto him he pushed you down onto the couch restricting your actions. He held your hips in place and plowed into you with bruising thrusts that turned into fast and shallow storks. You couldn’t keep up and gripped the back of the couch hoping it was enough to hold you together as he tried to rip you apart.

 “Fuck! Are you mind Y/N?”

 “Yours!”

 “Do you deserve it?”

 “Yes baby, I deserve it. Fuck me!”

 Henry didn’t need to be told twice. The pace in which he fucked you increased and the force behind his thrusts was giving you whiplash. You moaned and screeched and held on for dear life.

 “What’s my name?”

 “Baby.”

 “What’s my name Y/N!”

 “Henry.”

 “I can’t hear you.”

 “Henry! Fuck!” You didn’t care how loud you were at this point, everything he was doing felt too good.

 Henry grunted loudly once, then twice and you felt his release, even as he released his thrusts didn’t slow down for several minutes. Then he pulled from you and dropped onto the couch panting. You moaned and already felt the soreness from the pounding he’d just delivered.

 “Baby.” You touched his cheek and felt his jaw clench.

 “I need to clear my head Y/N.” He stood and dressed in silence then walked out of your trailer. He was definitely still seething, and you had no idea what you would do or how to make it right.

 You tried your best to finish the day on set and tried to remain present and focused, but it was difficult. Everyone could tell you were distracted, but no one brought anything up. you kept an eye out for Henry, but he didn’t come back and you were worried. Between takes you called him and left him two messages, both of them apologizing and reminding him how much you loved him. you knew he knew it but what else were you supposed to say.

 When you left set it was nearing two in the morning and you were exhausted. The drive to your hotel was not a long one. You stared at your phone the entire time fighting the urge to call him yet again. You knew when he was this angry calls and texts were not his priority. He needed to cool down. He hated arguing and went out of his way to prevent arguments and defuse the situation. Usually it meant he walked off and left you be for a few hours. This was different though; he’d seen another man with your nipple in his mouth. It wasn’t something he was prepped for either. You knew it was a major blow to the ego. You hated seeing the video of his sex scenes and made it a point never to be anywhere near when he filmed them.

 When you got off the elevator on the floor of your penthouse you felt horrible. Hoping a shower would help, you immediately got in and washed the day away and used the hot water and steam to relieve some of the stress and tension that was in your body. An hour later you only felt a little better. As you checked your phone you groaned seeing not one message from Henry. It was now almost four in the morning. He could have gotten back on a plane and left town for all you knew. Angrily you called him and rolled your eyes when it went to voicemail.

 “Look, I get you’re pissed at me and you didn’t want to see what you did and it’s my fault you did but it’s not fair to ignore me all day Henry. It’s been hours. I don’t know where you are, I don’t know if you’re hurt. This is not okay.” You ended the call and tossed your phone to the side and dropped onto the bed and sighed out.

 You heard the chime of the door and walked through the penthouse to the door. When you opened it there he stood with his elbows braced on the sides with his head hung. When his eyes met yours, you could tell he’d had a few drinks, but you also saw sadness and vulnerability.

 “I’m sorry,” Henry began. Those words melted away any annoyance you felt. You stepped to him and threw your arms around him holding him close. He slightly bent and lifted you into his arms. With your legs wrapped around him, he walked inside and to a seat.

 “I’m sorry baby. I should have told you. I’m sorry,” you expressed.

 “I was jealous—am jealous.  To see someone touch you like that, be like that—it cut me up. I love you Y/N. you have to know that.”

 “I know baby, I love you too. It’s only you for me. You have to know that. I don’t care about anyone else.” After searching your eyes for a few seconds, he nodded and rested his forehead on your chest and sighed out.

 “I’m a jealous man,” Henry finished.

 “You have no reason to be. You have me, all of me—for as long as you want me.”

 His eyes locked with yours and he caressed your cheek before he spoke.

 “Forever.”

 You smiled and softly kissed him. “Let’s go to the bedroom,” you whispered. Henry smiled and gave you a rakish look that had your belly doing backflips before he stood and carried you to the bedroom.

[bansheeoftheforest]

Us telling each other to go to sleep while simultaneously not sleeping

-

1) You can just stop writing the au if you hate it so much, or just take a hiatus. I know people like it but you shouldn't burn yourself out!

2) Have you ever heard of the Lykoi cat? Please search them up if you haven't

3) Diphylleia Grayi, is a type of flower that looks turns "invisible" when it touches water

4) Do you have a favorite spider?

5) Help I keep drawing porcelain Jekylls that I'll never post </3 /lh

6) hsjsvdjsgh I cant think of anything. Uhhh. The Wulver is a scottish creature that's a furry person with the head of a wolf and shares fish with locals. Honestly most drawings look like furries I've just noticed, why is no one drawing em with proper clothes

7) Similar questions to my last(?) ask. Do you have any thoughts on what supernatural/mythical creatures tgs characters would be if they were one? And what would your latest oc that I keep forgetting how to spell the name of be?

...The fact that that is accurate scares me-- I'm also going to save that meme for future references everytime either of us catch the other up late sdfds

1) THEORETICALLY YES... But I know that if I take a hiatus I will never finish it, and I know how guilty I would feel for not continuing it... Plus, most of my complaining is just dramatic but I'm not used to make chaptered fics and never will ever again. I guess it's just a mix between constantly having to worry about how the fic is perceived (especially since we are entering the more controversial/angsty chapters rn) combined with the deadline that makes... Me sad :'3

2) *frantic googling* OH MY GOD THEY LOOk LIKE THE DEFINITON OF A TRASH GOBLIN I WANT FIVE OF THEM IMMEDIATELY SFSDFSDF

3) oo h h m y god... It looks like ice... Are they edible? My brain is telling me to go absolutely bonkers on them. O o h h m y god

4) I had a very weird phase as a kid, who was also very afraid of spiders, where I tried to convince my parents to give me a tarantula because I saw that they were fluffy. I'm still massively afraid of spiders but otherwise I'd say redkneed birdspider (is that the english name???)

5) Bestie I know how it feels my entire sketch book is just drawings of my ocs that will never grace tumblr </3

6) Oh man. I love Wulvers. I know jack shit about them but I had planned to have Henry meet a wulver in the Irrbloos Au at some point, since they were benevolent and helpful I had planned to have a wulver lead him back and get him back to the real world at some point but I never got so far into that plotline. But honestly... All pictures of werewolves of all kinds look like furries. Did you know that they have werehyenas in africa, which is basically just reverse werewolves (i.e a hyena that turns into a human instead of the other way around)?

7) I'm going to start off by saying that Cederic definitely would be some kind of nymph-like creature like an incubus of some kind or just a straight up male nymph/siren, something very pretty and very seductive because, I don't know if anyone read his part of the updated OC masterlist post, he was originally a prostitute and very much uses that to his advantage to get what he wants. Something cat-like would also make sense, as his mother (in the actual DND campaign) is the egyptian cat goddess Bastet, but regardless, he still has his cat so it would fit no matter.

*cracks knuckles* alright here we go. Not going to go into a lot of context i'm just going to spew shit out.

Jekyll - Werewolf, really, that's no surprise but a werewolf fits so good. Having a monstrous side he tries to hide that only comes out at night? *chef's kiss*

Hyde - Imp or poltergeist.

Robert - Vampire.

Rachel - Selkie

Jasper - since he already is a werewolf, he would just be Some Dude

Frankenstein - Dwarf, or Baba Yaga.

Griffin - Ghost that does not want to be a ghost

Emma - A Huldra, maybe? A benevolent nymph? A banshee? I just love her and I wanted to add her to the list somehow.

Maijabi - a ghost who is totally chill with being dead. Maybe one of those spirits who like to fuck with humans (metaphorically speaking) by hailing cabs and then ditching them in the middle of the ride.

Lavender/Ito - those centaurs that are deer instead of horses I forgot the name sdsdfs

thats all i can come up w at the moment sdfsdf

[jaimebluesq]

Tag Game:

10 Characters, 10 Fandoms, 10 Tags

Tagged by: @fortune-maiden

In no particular order:

1) Nie Huaisang - The Undamed/Mo Dao Zu Shi - My current comfort character/obsession/character I resonate with FAR TOO MUCH. Thank you NHS for getting me back into writing fanfic!

2) Percy Weasley - Harry Potter - Not only my favourite character in the Harry Potter franchise, but the one I played the most in role-playing games on Livejournal/Insanejournal/etc. I just loved getting into his head, even when I ended up fighting (in-game) with other characters.

3) Joxer the Mighty - Xena/Hercules - Ah, Joxer, how many years did I spend with you, writing fanfic, playing around in fandom, interacting with fans, etc? You were a formative part of my entire fandom experience and I will forever be grateful to you.

4) Feng Zhiwei - The Rise of Phoenixes - this is the show that solidified my absorption into CDramas. I love this character SO FUCKING MUCH, even if her ending is sad (and Gu Nanyi, ugh, my heart!).

5) Wei Yingluo - Story of Yanxi Palace - and speaking of how I got into watching CDramas... I was playing silly emperor/concubine games on mobile and someone mentioned it was a good show, so I said what the hell, I'll give it a watch... and the rest is history.

6) Gonzo the Great - The Muppets - I can't make a list like this without mentioning what is technically the first fanfic I ever wrote, when I was in grade 5 - we were asked to write a short piece for a class assignment and I wrote an origin story for Gonzo that kind of resembled the Superman origin but funny.

7) Wesley Crusher - Star Trek: The Next Generation - Yes, I was a Wesley fangirl once upon a time. My obsession with TNG was legendary - I used to sit at my VCR every new episode and tape them, making sure to pause the recording so as to not get the commercials. I convinced my friends to sit with me, go through episodes, and memorize funny lines that we could say to each other in public areas as inside jokes. My parents even brought me to Canada's Wonderland when the ST thing first started there and I got to chat with a klingon and a vulcan after I went to the klingon and went NuqneH. OMG I feel so old LOL

8) Ianto Jones - Torchwood/Doctor Who - The tea boy stole my heart when I first saw him in a suit, but when we found out what he was hiding in the basement and witnessed his misguided loyalty to love, I was hooked. Children of Earth never happened (not because I can't stand that he died, it just wasn't a good death imho, it wasn't a brave sacrifice to save people, just fridging to give Captain Jack motivation to do what he did). (I was torn between Ianto and Donna Noble because Donna FTW, but I was one of the rare few who actually watched Torchwood before Doctor Who, so Ianto was my #1)

9) Zevran Arainai - Dragon Age - It was close between Zev and Solas (look at previous entry for clue as to why I loved Solas so fucking much), but out of all the games (Origins, 2, Inquisition), Zev was the one I romanced the most because he's just so MY TYPE. I loved the flirting, the backstory, the fact that when you get serious he backs away. Yes he can be a mouthy jackass with the overly sexual talk with the other companions, but I've legit had friends like that and they were a blast. (Add Fenris to this list and you see I have a fucking type).

10) Evie Frye - Assassin's Creed: Syndicate - I know this is def gonna be an unpopular opinion, but Syndicate is the AC game I've had the most fun playing, have played it 3 times at least all the way through, and I fucking love Evie. I love her story, her relationship with her father, her relationship with her brother, and of course the romance with Henry Green (who I would fall for too). I know it's one of the lesser popular AC games, but I don't care, I'm so happy they made it and I'm happy I got to play as Evie because she rocks.

Tagging: @clumsyelf @joeyrz @raging-red-lotus-of-qinghe

[theonetheycallhannah]

The Treatment of Captain Syverson-Chapter 11: Discharge Plan

Characters: Captain Syverson x OFC (Shane Dawson)

Summary: The highs of Shane and Sy’s first weekend as a couple are followed up by some big news from Sy, leading to our couple’s first fight.

Don’t miss a session! Click here to catch up on this story or explore my other works!

Word Count: 2.7

Warnings:  Language, mature themes, smut, sort of unprotected sex, rough-ish sex, angst, alcohol consumption,

Author’s Note: First off, I wanna talk about the word “victuals.” I’ve loved this word for a long time, even though it makes no sense, phonetically as it actually rhymes with the “fiddles” or “riddles.”(It’s true, look it up!) It’s very pastoral and somewhat archaic, so you don’t hear it too much anymore in current writing about the present, but I just felt like Sy would say it. Secondly, it was really hard for me to put my darlings through the argument in this chapter. I want them to have only happy times…but that provides no tension or motivation for story development…and I want to keep writing them more than I want them to be happy… I guess I finally understand why authors torture their characters! Lol! It might take a bit of time for me to sort out what their relationship looks like adding the distance factor, but I have some ideas that might work. Also, it might be an opportunity to do a bit more of Sy’s perspective, which I thoroughly enjoy, and may go back and fill in some blanks for him in between chapters I’ve already done. I hope you all enjoy this installment of the Treatment of Captain Syverson! Feedback in any form is always appreciated!

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, Henry is not mine, le sigh, and all mention of him, his characters, any characters from his films, or his precious doggy, Kal, are strictly for transformative and recreational use. I neither ask for, nor accept payment for the work I post on Tumblr or AO3. Unbeta’d because this is for fun and escapism.

Tags: 

@onlyhenrys

@cavillryarchive

@summersong69

@titty-teetee

@bloodyinspiredfuck

@agniavateira

@oddsnendsfanfics

@omgkatinka

@thisismysecretthirstblog

@misslaland

@speakerforthedead0

@tumblnewby

@suavechops

@radkesgirl83

@wheretheriversrunintothesea

Hope I’m not forgetting anyone! If you want to be notified when I post a new chapter or work, I’ll be happy to add you to my tag list! Stricken blogs are getting personal messages from me when a new chapter is uploaded because Tumblr’s faulty tagging system will not stand in the way of me delivering what the people want!(?) lol! (Although…their lackadaisical notification system might…sorry for that. I have no control. lol!)

X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@

The rest of the weekend was spent in blissful relaxation. Sy went to his place to feed Aika and bring her over at Shane's insistence. The dog had been slightly standoffish with her, but Sy assured her that it was in her nature to be aloof, and that she needed to be engaged or instructed to behave more doglike.

"It's her training. She's still a soldier. It's hard for us to shake those habits. Like me calling you 'ma'am' at first."

"She's another die hard. I respect that." she chuckled, scratching Aika behind her perked ears, and eliciting pants of contentment from her.

Sy's skills with a spatula were unmatched. That was to say, he made the best pancakes she'd ever had. They almost didn't need syrup…almost. They ordered an obscene amount of Chinese takeout which lasted them about three meals each. Sunday evening, though, which had a gloom to it no matter the circumstances, required some comfort food. They agreed on pasta, so Shane made up some of her famous alfredo sauce and probably twice the recommended portion of pasta for two humans to consume. There were no leftovers. Sy had three helpings, himself. Three heaping bowls of it. Shane couldn't handle more than one and a half servings, even though she wanted to gorge herself. She knew too much would make her ill.

When they weren't eating, the were cuddling on the couch, or in Shane's bed. They watched more Parks and Rec, and a few other films and shows that Sy requested, just to break things up. Their bodies were constantly wrapped in each other, leading to frequent bouts of making out, fooling around, and sex in almost every room of the house.

Her favorite had been the shower. She insisted on getting cleaned up, but Sy had objections.

~~~~~~~~

"I'll be less than ten minutes, come on, I reek! You can't wanna kiss me when I smell like this!" she said, trying to shut the bathroom door on the human mack truck before her. Broad and formidable.

"You smell like sex, and…me, darlin. I've never wanted to kiss you more," he said, backing her up toward the shower doors. "but I guess if you must. Lemme help, though." he pulled open the glass door, forcing her into his captivating kiss, and maneuvering her backward into the walk-in, stone tile shower. He pulled off her tank top, capturing her breasts in his hands and mouth for a moment before kneeling to remove her shorts and kiss her thighs. He pulled himself away too quickly and started the water flowing.

"Sy, you're fully dressed!" he was barefoot, but otherwise, in jeans and her favorite of his tees. The letters DILLIGAF across a skull, black on red. She always laughed on the inside when she saw it. Because although Sy often had to put on a calloused and brusque act when he'd been an officer in the Army, he was terribly soft and sweet when the occasion called for it. The irony being that although he didn't look like he gave a fuck, he actually did.

"I've got more clothes in the truck and you've got a dryer." he maneuvered her under the pulsing stream of the showerhead. "Gotta get you wet." he let the water run through her hair as he reached for her shampoo, a coconutty concoction that reminded her of summer, squeezed a bit into his hand, and lathered it up. He worked the suds into her wet hair gently, raking his nails across her scalp in a way that excited and ignited every atom in her. She sighed at his touch which made him groan with need.

He tilted her head back to rinse the lather out and reached for the conditioner. He was a bit more generous with it than strictly necessary, but she didn't protest. He pulled her hair forward in two sections, one over each shoulder and worked the emollient into the strands. His hands slick from the product, he ran them over her breasts and her abdomen and hips…between her legs. There her own arousal was primed to combine with the tropical unction. She gasped as he worked his fingers over her, slow at first, but speeding up, only to slow again. When she finally whimpered in frustration, he undid his jeans, and backed her up to the stony grey wall, not giving a fuck, as his shirt had suggested, that he and his clothes were getting soaked. His only care now apparently, was to satisfy the simpering cries of "yes, please." from Shane.

His first few thrusts were slow and measured, knowing that she was still adjusting to his size. But it didn't take long for him to lose control. She wasn't sure what was making him like this, but she was not complaining in the least. The texture of his jeans on her bare, wet thighs was a sensation she wouldn't soon forget. She gripped at him, holding onto his shirt for dear life as her climax built to impossible heights.

She was loving the way he lost himself in the ferocity of the act. And his release led to hers immediately. She wrapped herself around him in blissful embrace, and whispered his name as a prayer.

"Sorry, darlin,' I meant to…"

"It's okay. I'm on the pill and I'm not at a particularly dangerous time in my cycle."

He kissed her tenderly and reached for her bath puff and some body wash. "Well, let’s get ya cleaned up."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The only good part about Monday was that she'd be treating him. Although, he was scheduled in the afternoon. Her morning would drag on eternal.

He greeted her with a typical "hey, susnshine" and she led him into the gym, feeling his gaze on her ass, wanting, even though they'd just left each other quite satisfied that morning. He was freshly showered, beard well groomed, and his hair growing back in very nicely. He'd asked her weeks ago whether he should keep the buzzed look or not, and she had been entirely for growing it out. She wanted something to run her hands through. She'd be fine if it was at least shoulder length, but she wouldn't push that on him.

They did their normal warm up on the bikes, followed by some plyometric drills, which made him scowl at her in a way that lit her up like a firecracker. But the fact that he was able to jump up onto the box was encouraging. He couldn't have done that a month ago. He was progressing so well and was so close to his long term goals and discharge. It almost made Shane sad. It wasn't as though they wouldn't see each other, but having him break up the insanity of her day three times a week for just an hour was invaluable.

As they were doing their usual end of the session stretch in her treatment room, and she noted the improved range of motion he was getting, he broke the amiable silence with a question.

"Hey, can I bring a pizza or somethin' over for dinner tonight after you get off?"

"Sure!" she could tell there was something he wanted to say, but was holding back. She prodded. "Everything okay? You've been a bit…off today."

"I'm good. Just a little distracted." he deflected by touching her hip, grinning like the Cheshire Cat. She swatted him away.

"Not here, Sy."

"But that makes it fun!" he pouted.

"No, that really could get me fired! Getting frisky on company time!"

"Mmmm, I'd love to frisk you right now." he reached between their legs to try and grab her again, but she thwarted him and pinned his wrists at his ears.

"Cool it, cowboy, or your last two sessions are gonna make you wish you'd never met me." she threatened.

"Ain't nothin', nothin' on God's good green earth could make me wish that, sunshine." His stunning blue eyes softened her resolve and she let go, continuing to stretch him.

"Still…cool it." she grinned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She'd just had time to change into some comfy clothes, wash her face, and put her hair up when her doorbell rang.

Sy stood smiling under the porch light, a modern white knight, carrying a large pizza from Pizza Hut and a six pack of Miller High Life.

"Aren't you a sight for sore eyes! And it's nice to see you too, Sy!" she laughed, teasing him.

"Should I leave the victuals and go?" he asked, mock concern on his sarcastic brow.

"Get in here, soldier."

She got out napkins and paper plates because as horrible as it sounded, she just couldn't think about doing dishes tonight. She was even glad Sy had brought drinks in disposable or recyclable containers, and not wine, which she tended to prefer. She was exhausted, but not upset, which made the silence they ate in bearable. Sy still seemed to have something on his mind, though.

"Did you have something you wanted to talk about tonight, Sy?"

"Kinda, yeah, uh…it's kind of a big thing for me, and I know this is new, what we have, but…well, I'll just tell ya."

"Go on." she encouraged, worried.

"I…I talked to my old CO about jobs in the private sector. He referred me to a company that…well it's sort of an employment agency for vets. Mostly security for private companies and individuals. I had a phone interview with them this past Tuesday. I just got a call this morning that they want to meet me in person to finalize everything. Mostly a formality. When I go for that, I'll also have to stay there a couple of weeks to a month for training."

"Where is this…gig?" She said, flat affect hiding the feelings brewing under her skin.

"The offices are in Charlottesville…Virginia. And there may be some cross country training there in Shenandoah National Park."

"Cross country…by that do you mean survival training?" She was still cool, but getting more livid.

"You could call it that, I guess. But it won't be a challenge for me. I'm more worried about the technical stuff." His bravado and flippancy about the whole endeavor was enraging her. The thought that he'd be in the wilderness alone, was only a fraction of the big picture. He was going away for a month? And he had known about the job for a week now. A week in which so much about their relationship had changed, and shifted. How could he think she'd just accept this without a bit of raging.

"You waited until after we slept together to tell me this. You did it on purpose, Sy." that was the biggest problem, she thought. The fact that he seemed to be hiding it from her. It brought back old trauma that she thought he'd never have subjected her to.

"Yes and no, Shane. I wasn't intentionally keeping anything from you, I just didn't wanna bring it up until somebody bit."

"You wanted to keep me in the dark about something you were excited about? How do you think that makes me feel?"

"I didn't wanna get your hopes up or mine. Honestly."

"Saying 'honestly' doesn't make it honest, Sy. I've told you about everything that Elliott put me through. The lies. The secrets. This puts a bad taste in my mouth. You have to see that. Can't you?"

"Oh, sunshine, I--"

"No, please. Do not do that right now. Don't call me sunshine when all I can see is the night."

"I'm so sorry. My intention was not to make you feel in any way like that asshole ever did. Please hear me when I say that. I want to be the opposite of him in your mind in every way, darlin.' Please believe that."

There was so much sincerity in his voice, now nearing tearfulness that she felt he must be telling her the truth. She nodded. But was still apprehensive about the nature of the job and the training.

"But…what if you get hurt again?"

"I won't. You've all but fixed me, Shane. I'm stronger than ever."

"Can't you just…find a safe job? Here?" She was being selfish. She couldn't help it. Even though she knew she might regret it.

"Sit at a desk, ya mean? Deliver pizzas?" he indicated the box between them on the table. "Call people and ask them if they're happy with their cable services, Shane? Is that all I'm good for now?" he was angry.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"No, of course not. You're a PT. That's what you were meant to do, right? Well, imagine if you couldn't do that no more. Something or another, an injury, perhaps, or just plain ol' shitty situation, left you in a position where you couldn't go back. Couldn't do your dream job. Couldn't fulfill your purpose." he spat. "Wouldn't you do anything you could to be some shadow of what you were meant to be?"

She couldn't speak. Because he was right in so many ways.

"Because right now, I'm nothin'. I'm not doin' anyone any good. I'm a drain on my country, the one I swore to protect with my very life. It's like I've broken an oath. And it's fractured my soul."

"I see that. I truly do. But I need you here. You do ME good, Sy. I'm already half dreading d/c'ing you. I don't wanna have to say a goodbye, too." it was her truth. But it hit him very much sideways.

"So…what is it, Shane? You only want me when I'm broken? You only want me so you can fix me?"

"No, of course not! That's not what--"

"Am I a charity case to ya now? Is that why ya finally gave in and let me in your bed?"

"Sy, no!" she was crying now. It had hurt so much to think that he could have gotten that from what she'd said.

"I think if you can have feelings hurt about this situation then so can I."

He stood to leave, but she caught him by the wrist.

"Shane…you know I would never, ever harm you. But please… don't test my limits. Let… go." She did.

She was still quite a bit faster than him, so she ran ahead and blocked the door.

"Move." he insisted. She didn't.

"Hear me out, and then I'll let you go."

He crossed his arms and nodded, his gaze still one of cold steel.

"Sy, I didn't mean to make this job that you're clearly excited for into a source of anguish or to make it about me. I'm thrilled that you're going to get to do something you want in another field. I really am. I just…being with you has made me realize how good life can really be. And even if you'd told me before we slept together, I would have said the same thing. It was selfish of me to haul my baggage into the conversation when you aren't, have never been, and could never be Elliot. His best couldn't compare with your worst. And I will do my best in the future to think about who you are before I complain about the work you find to do."

"It's like I said about Aika before. She's a soldier. Hard trained. And so am I. It took a lot of hard work for me to get where I am, so much that it fundamentally altered who I am as a person. Now, in my opinion, those changes were for the better. I was kind of a shit before I became a soldier, thought the sun rose and set with me. I got some perspective and met some good people…lost some, too. Saw some shit I can't unsee. Some of it haunts me to this day, and I figure it always will. But I reckon if I can keep fighting the fight somehow. Keep protecting people in whatever way I can, my training and experience won't be a total waste."

"I understand and respect that, Sy. And I will back you in any way I can. I'll water your plants, I'll keep Aika whenever you're gone, I'm here for you."

"Oh, shit! I wasn't even thinking about having to leave my dog behind! Maybe this WON'T work!" he chuckled.

"Second fiddle to another woman already. I knew you were gonna break my heart, Captain Logan Syverson."

"Never intentionally, sunshine." he hugged her, tight, and with his whole body. Their argument in the past and their future an exciting mystery. Shane had never felt so safe and loved.

Up Next: Chapter 12: Final Home Exercise Program

[thecrenellations]

Return of the Thief Notes, Part Three: The Book of Pheris, Volume 2, Chapters 6-14 and “Alyta’s Missing Earring”

Notes from my first read, October 2020. (Part One | Part Two | TaT)

Contents:  Elephants, guesses about gods and dead men, villain team up, the unexpected, AAAAAAH, elaboration on the word cloud above (which is one big Gen, medium Pheris, medium love, and scattered other names), and more quantitative analysis! I love this book.

Format:  Page number. My thoughts (Context?)

Chapter 6

285. unkingly moment, last night with her at home

MISMATCHED STOCKINGS (I have a thing about this.)

Wedges of ribbons?

285. cute

286. a pitneen? A drunk bird?

Wait. Gift of animals??? Did he steal the thunderbolts wearing it?

A canary no longer

287. Hilarion and Ion, wow

Throw a cup of wine on me

288. War pants! War pants!

What’s Attolia wearing?

Sophos! (the whistling!)

288. Ok fine it’s gonna be sad ... I say as if I didn’t just experience the trial (the last lighthearted moment)

Pepper!

Be careful Pheris

Also Relius went to Dite and Juridius, right? (I was convinced Dite would show up)

Sinerine!

290. SOCKS! Yay <3 magus

I was resigned to not much magus but he is HERE!

He’s … so much nicer than he was to the kids in the Thief, lol

A CART!

Lamb, falling in same paragraph. Worried.

Gen :( Gen you ran all over the palace and leapt in the water last night. You are so stupid.

292. Yay Sophos I love you

Math buddies!

294. I’M SAD.

They have had this convo before

I love them

It’s because I can that I think I should

295. Do not overreach. Eddis is right

Danger in self indulgence?

I love her! “I was outside chasing your brother with a stick”

296. My heart. You have to trust yourself. I don’t know if I can. Then you have to trust us.

Tactical Irene!

Thanks I’m gonna hold on to it: “The Call of life is a s powerful as the call of death, and it is no weakness to answer to it”

297. Oh no. My children. Tell each other things like that!

Great time to be childish, Gen.

Yeah honestly. It’s bothered her FOREVER

299. Pull it together, kids!

Thx Helen

Inkpots … :( :( :(

Chapter 7

302. See … that Continent occupation isn’t good either!

303. Unfortunately that is NOT an alternative. Bc volcano.

305. This is stressful.

Chloe, interesting

306. Elephants

Oh my god it’s better than I ever could have imagined (there was like 10 years of lead up to the elephants, and I thoroughly enjoyed them)

I love him

Gen wtf

Yes drink up those guards (“We could keep [an elephant] in the guard’s bathhouse! There’s plenty of room.” “And the guards will bathe ...?” “In the palace reservoir.” “Our drinking water.”)

#6 Gen about elephants

308. This is gonna be a disaster

Hilarion with an eyeglass

Fuck Pheris is making this up.

Gen I love you

Oh my god

Honestly idk if Gen is having fun but I AM

They’re. They’re such a power couple.

Also Bu-seneth is so rude to Attolia

309. so vague about battle, but I’m sure it’s horrible

310. hero talk. Chills.

311. all the woman comparisons for Gen (“Would [a world with no war and no heroes be a bad thing?” “That’s a woman’s question”)

Wow. Interesting. Anonymity

312. Don’t listen to them Gen!

Bad tempered cooks

313. lol. Good looks.

Gen. the hand joke. Why

Well that was … a scene (I don’t know my Henry V)

Reassuring to have a glove. Which one?

314. No. Bad. This is what I was afraid of. (Nahuseresh baiting Gen with Kamet)

Ok Pheris

315. That cannot be true. (it was not!)

Gen. No. No.

316. Wow. That worked out well. So far.

They called him annux. If Kamet is really dead…

319. Yeah Attolia is RIGHT

Yeah I can’t actually either!

Irene knows. In his story!

320. Glove resolved very fast

Interesting reversal (Gen and his dad)

Maddening!

Chapter 8

322. who’s charging off in a haze of glory now

Philologos wounded

Wait, the attendants follow him in to battle...

Cleon RIP

Temenus <3

No. Stenides

If they ever returned.

His brother died in an explosion

Gen’s tears

This is sad.

323. lion lamb :(

325. At least they have each other

Morality is an illusion. Like safety?

326. that’s what Costis was mapping, right? (nope)

How many has Gen killed now

328. Who. Pol? Ambiades? (The cairn man question remains)

Oh no

Oh no. you can fall from a horse

HILARION!

Is Fordad a spy?

I am just not accepting this yet

WAIT THE MEDES TOOK HIM! (I thought the Attolians had taken Gen, or Gen’s body, at first.)

330. wow things only Pheris can do

GDI Erondites

WOW THIS IS A VILLAIN TEAM UP

332. You gave it to him dude (Nahuseresh asking “Why does he still have this?” about Gen’s hook)

I love Gen. I wonder if he’s afraid.

This is bad.

Whose treason, whose betrayal?

333. Yeah! Kamet said so (“Tell me again that you are king.” “Annux, if you prefer.”)

334. Oh god.

Get your stories straight bastards

Rolled in a rug!

336. Oh gen

Oh god

Yeah this is …

Be careful what you ask for

338. What did he sign as, though, Attolis? Eugenides?

Nomenus wtf

What does mwt have against facial hair (Fordad, Nahuseresh)

Costis please come (idk how I thought he was going to help, but I was in Costis Denial and expected him to show up at any moment)

Everyone must be going through a lot

A face like an open grave

Gen.

Gen I love you

YES

YES

Is he … invulnerable now?

Gen what.

Is he possessed? Is he already a god?

341. Yeah same. (“I think he meant that I should not fear him, either. I did, though ... I still followed him”)

This isn’t being self indulgent or overreaching, is it?

342. RIP Ion Nomenus

“My work”

Oh Nomenus

Does he just exist for the morally gray and loyal angst feelings? It works (...)

344. What did he DO

Yes! Swearing Gen!

345. love all caps Gen

Those names

Aaah

346. Ooof.

Chapter 9

347. moon promises

Yeah

Noooo Philologos :(

Legarus … :(

349. Gen what what

Sparks

Costis? Stenides? STENIDES?

Wow ok he killed Bu-seneth

350. god

See I said Nahuseresh shouldn’t have said that

Also is Gen a bastard

351. WHAT (“Because your council had just voted to kill him”)

Oh Helen

Oh Irene

Does he invite him in?

This is reassuring to the reader (“He can bear his god a little while without losing himself”)

Aaaaah Galen

354. Gen that’s a lot. A lot.

Don’t kill everyone.

So so so x7 of doom

Bye Yorn

I hope he wins too

Go away Nahuseresh

Omg

another fall

Interregnum

Ok it was Lader (when you don’t know who the man at the cairn was, keep on guessing!)

Yeah the circumstances thing is back

Oh god

Oh no

Chapter 10

361. how long has it been?

362. three days

I love them (Elephants! My excellent queen!)

You promised to trust him

364. Oh no. Oh no. (Relius)

370. These Helen convos…

371. Sad. :(

372. Emtis and Lader

Yeah.

Omg

374. Wow

Steal by elephant?

377. Don’t forget about Dite!

378. He’s gonna kill him?

379. Is Dite dead too?

Oh Sejanus

Oh I see

He’s got a mercy taste too

380. Switching!

Lying in moonlight. Hm.

381. Yesss

Nooooo

383. I’m nervous

Gods blessing on your road

Wow. <3

They would have fallen… (if Pheris had gone through with his plan, that’s how they both would have died)

Did not expect Sejanus feelings in Rott.

Chapter 11

386. He’s gonna know. But the trust.

Ion knows.

390. Gen…

Pheris is Lyopidus?

I’m scared

393. I kind of love Ion

More Sejanus, bring it on

I’m nervous

Hmmm… who could it be

395. MoW :( <3 I will not be ok if he dies too

Gen knows the way bc Costis (nope)

Oh my god these two (“I lied” “I know”)

Chapter 12

398. Oh no.

This is not

Her Thief

Irene. “only sleeping” this is what Eddis said to her

But mist… water???

Face touch

402. not living or dead. King

Yes. But no.

403. crying at everything and the MoW next to him

There he went

It was the Eddisians. He fought with them.

404. yeah that’s a lot to deal with, Pheris

405. what a mystery man (Sejanus)

Lol mysterious exit averted

Excuse me that was a difference

406. :(

Am I king

407. Helen is once again right. She’s also always right

MOIRA was Melisande???!??!? (who even knows)

409. ?? Irene?

Same as for Dite. Man loves his brothers. (nephews. you know what I mean.)

Nice.

AAH yup. Add it to the list (“How neatly you tie them together” ... the list of is ways Gen and Irene are becoming more like each other)

410. speaking of which where is Costis!

Hm… what god was that

I love their reactions

411. SPLENDID.

Oh Irene. It’s true <3

It’s so true (“When the king gives his heart he gives it completely”)

Now I’m crying again, at them

412. Gen, she has a point.

Amazing. I … I don’t think she meant to ask like THAT

Jesus, Gen.

You do not know a wagon from a wheelbarrow

413. Irene!

She’d better get home safe.

Gen!

Omg

414. I have another bad feeling, about Gen

415. High king or queen though?

Magus <3

Chapter 13

416. “of course”

That’s ominous

417. No! Sejanus!

A gut wound yikes

418. sadness

419. lol “ill will”

We’re in Roa. My heart’s pounding.

422. I love Gen.

YESSS

Yes I love them.

Sheep.

Kamet!!!

?!?

Costis. Mattresses exist.

424. Oh no.

426. roof dream

Good roof dream

Good job Helen

428. TWINS. Everyone was RIGHT

Reyatimi

Oh shit. The sky.

Oh dear. :( aaah

430. Climbing the rigging!

“it’s just that you have so many least favorite things”

431. I love them (Gen and Irene)

432. I love them (Gen and Helen)

433. RIGHT! I was thinking

I can’t <3 (they’re naming the baby after the MoW, and it’s perfect, and she’s not gonna tell us, huh)

OH MY GOD!!! (baby thief!)

WOW!

434. AAAAAAH (Hector! @threetoadswaltz​ finished reading before me and knew that I would explode about this and I DID, I threw my arms in the air! HECTOR!)

PERFECTION!

435. AAAAAAAAH (this was when it became clear they were going to dance on the roof)

Yes she was (as surefooted as the king)

Is this the first time she’s Irene

Yes.

I’m filled with happiness

Celia and Lavia again … lol.

Lol Chloe

THALIA

CRENELATED wall

HE’S ALIVE

Kamet is a sweetheart

The gods!!!

The gods!

Aracthus

Mystery goddess?

Ula?

Moira! Yes!

(I was very happy. The page itself:)

Alyta’s Missing Earring

Wait. Was it Alyta.

Glad we got a bi god (with all due respect to Immakuk and Ennikar, whose bi-ness and godliness is perhaps more up to the reader)

Got very bi very fast

Also. He’s Gen.

Interesting difference in story

Kathodicia!

Are we literally getting ALL the answers? (No. But so many more than I expected!)

Gen’s grandfather sucks

An urn huh

Omg. Heiro’s earrings?

Oh my gosh.

Same, Gen. Same.

Obvs Phresine knows.

Is Phresine a goddess?

Same, Gen. Same.

She got to tell a story! She is so happy!

I think he’s a little scared

Moleskin

Yeah peace huh

This series is socially sanctioned silliness

1000 Eugenides. Wow.

They did melt though

Little thief.

<3 <3 <3

He’s a character in a story

A big question

Tamarisk? Takima? (We are not getting all the answers.)

That’s it! Thank you for reading - it feels very self-indulgent to type up all of these, but I will honestly take most chances to relive the intense and wonderful experience of reading this book for the first time, which often means looking back at my own notes and sometimes means sharing them with people. Also, I really love reading liveblogs/real-time book thoughts, so here is one from awhile ago ... all at once.

Anyway, check out this word cloud from all of the notes (made with this site):

It’s ... mostly just character names, with a variety of words that express my enthusiasm and feeling (love, lol, wow, yes, excuse me...). Gen is the biggest because I said his name 115 times! Here are some totals for the other characters who came up a lot:

115 - Gen (and 10 Eugenides)

42 - Pheris

26 - Costis

18 - Irene (and 6 Attolia)

16 - Helen (and 8 Eddis)

10 - Sophos (and 4 Sounis)

12 - the magus

11- Kamet

11 - Teleus

10 - Relius

9 - Ion

6 - MoW

6 - Moira

5 - Sejanus

These don’t fully represent how much I had to say about them, because I didn’t always refer to people by name or title ... which kind of explains why Costis’s total is ridiculously high compared to how much he is in the book -  I likely have more notes about other characters, but I didn’t need to bring up their names because they were already present in the scenes I was taking notes on (for example, I think I talked about Relius more than Teleus, the magus, or Kamet, but many of those just referred to him as he, because it was obvious to me who I meant). But also I was just looking for Costis! Anyway. My use of names and titles for the monarchs also really illustrates how much this book reshaped the way I think of these characters’ relationship to them, Gen’s and Irene’s especially.

It’s representative of my feelings about this series that I wrote “I love them” about so many combinations of characters. Who, exactly? And how many times? Well...

5 - Gen and Irene

4 - Gen and Helen

2 - Gen and Pheris

1 - Gen, Irene, Helen, and Sophos

1 - Helen and Sophos

1 - Costis and Kamet

1 - unknown combo of Gen, Pheris, and Relius on p.166, I love them all and can’t remember. Kamet’s map was there, too, and I do love Kamet, so maybe he was in there too.

no matter what the numbers say, I love them all endlessly, and I love this book.

be blessed in your endeavors, yes I will take any questions about these notebook screams, etc.

[gleekto]

Summary: College AU/Famous!Blaine and Fanboy!Kurt - Kurt POV

Kurt really doesn’t have time to figure out the dating world between being a freshman at prestigious theatre school, LAADA,  and his active but secret blogging life in the Sing!Fandom. So what if Sing! ended last year? There are still fics to read and actors to follow. Especially the uber talented heartthrob lead, Blaine Anderson. He can act. He can sing. He can even dance. He’s gay. He’s out. And he’s only 24. Kurt is willing to twiddle his thumbs and click refresh until Blaine Anderson’s next project.

He just didn’t expect the next project to be on his roommate Rachel’s new TV show.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9

Even Better than the Real Thing (10/13)

Kurt drops the phone as his heart starts to race and panic takes over. He feels like he’s going to throw up. No. He doesn’t have time to throw up. He immediately signs on to tumblr and deletes his blog. Gone. But it’s too late anyways. He calls Mercedes on autopilot. 

“It’s over, Mercedes,” Kurt shakes as he says it. “He knows.”

“What? Who knows what?” But he can practically see the information dawn on her as she says it. “He knows you were a fan? Shit.”

“Yes, specifically, he knows that I was LimaBlaineFan - and I say was because I just deleted.”

“Oh my god, Kurt. How did this happen? Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not okay. And I don’t know. Or I can guess. He surprise visited me and I forgot to close my laptop screen and I must have left him in my room while I was dealing with Rachel and her oat milk,” Kurt puts the pieces together. “Fucking oat milk.”

“So he ended it on the spot?”

“No. God. He didn’t even say anything. He must have  seen something but not much, gone home and read the blog, and then texted me 24 hours later with a terse goodbye.”

“So what did he say?” Kurt sends her the text. “It’s not great,” She agrees. “But that’s not exactly closure.”

“I don’t think I get closure after what I did. Just memories of our night together and of what an idiot I am.” Kurt goes over the whole story with Mercedes - how he obviously wanted to be chill when he met Blaine, didn’t want to seem like a desperate fanboy but just a friend of Rachel’s - which he is! That wasn’t a lie. And he always made sure to give Blaine an out, not to talk too much, but Blaine kept wanting to talk and flirt and - well, as soon as he really started to believe that they were more than friendly acquaintances with a mutual friend, he stopped blogging. But it was too late by that point to say ‘Oh by the way, I was such a big fan of Sing! that I have a blog about it and your name may feature.’ But he knows it’s all an excuse. Blaine told him the first time they met that a fan is not a friend. And he didn’t heed the warning. Or tell the truth.

Mercedes listens to the story she already knows, and affirms and agrees, but unfortunately, can’t really fix a situation that can’t be fixed. Kurt spends the night staring at his ceiling and the next day moping around the house, tired and cranky. He binges Gossip Girl and eats popcorn and texts Mercedes sad face emojis.

Even Rachel notices that something’s wrong when she comes in that evening.  “You’re still in pajamas?” She looks at him quizzically. “And you look like hell.”

“Thanks?”

“And I only point that out because it’s very unlike you.”

“I guess that is actually a compliment.”

“What’s wrong?” Before he thinks of what he’s going to say, Rachel interrupts again. “Wait. Blaine was a wreck today - bags under his eyes, forgot all his lines. Just said he had a rough night. Okay, Kurt. What is going on with you two?”

“Nothing now.”

“Now?”

“It’s not working out, okay?” Rachel starts to say something again but thinks better of it.

“Okay,” She seems to clue in to the fact that he does not want to talk about it. “I’ll go out later to get you a piece of cheesecake from Henry’s.” His favourite cheesecake place. 

“Thank you,” He says sincerely. “Best therapy.”

...

After his cheesecake, which did take his mind off the mess of his life for at least 15 minutes, he moves back to his bedroom for night two of ceiling gazing, when his phone buzzes.

Blaine: So you didn’t respond.

He stares at the message, willing the right response to come to him.

Kurt: I honestly just don’t know what to say. Other than I’m sorry. I guess that’s what I should have said.

Blaine: So you are LimaBlaineFan, right?

Kurt: Guilty. Very guilty.

Blaine: Shit.

Kurt: I know we’re done - it’s my fault. You don’t need to say anything.

Kurt can’t actually bear the idea of Blaine lecturing him on honesty amidst crushing his heart.

Blaine: It is your fault. But we should talk.

Kurt: We should?

Blaine: Meet me at the Coffee Bean tomorrow at 3, okay?

Kurt: Let me check my calendar.

Blaine: Cheeky.

Kurt knows he made him smile despite himself.

Kurt: I’ll be there.

...

Kurt gets to the Coffee Bean half an hour early so he can be sure to be there first. He buys Blaine his favourite medium drip and adds a vanilla almond biscotti. 

“These for me?” Blaine says as he sits down across from Kurt.

“The least I could do.” Blaine rolls his eyes and shakes his head, but he accepts the coffee and cookie. “I’m really sorry. I should have told you.”

“Yeah, you should’ve,” Blaine says and pauses, sipping his coffee. 

“Can I ask you a question?” Kurt starts.

Blaine shrugs. “Go for it.”

“Why did you ask me to meet you for coffee? I mean, after finding out the guy you just -” Kurt gets red despite himself.

“Got naked with,” Blaine fills in.

“Yes - was actually a fan following your career-”

“And my body parts,” Blaine adds and Kurt gets much redder.

“I mean, I think that gives you license to fully ghost me without another word.”

“True,” Blaine nods his head. “But for one, you are my co-star’s roommate-”

“At least that’s true,” Kurt sighs at himself.

“Also, I’m not an asshole.”

“But I probably gave you reason to think that I am one.”

“No - which is the real reason I wanted to talk. The timeline.” Kurt looks at him confused. “Your blog on tumblr. It seems like once we met, you only blogged a few times. And by the time I was interested in you, you stopped posting.”

Kurt nods, giving himself an internal high five for at least one decent choice. “I did. Right after we-”

“Made out all night?” Blaine has got to stop putting these images back into his head in the midst of a break up conversation.

“No. It was before that. After you  - you know we talked in my room-”

Blaine remembers, smiling.  “When I got you to tell me you had never been kissed so I could tell you that you should be.”

“You’re so calculating,” Kurt shakes his head.

Blaine raises his hands in defense. “My intentions were pure, I promise. Besides, I could say the same about you.”

“I wasn’t calculating! I wasn’t even trying to be your friend, let alone your, you know. I am definitely not sophisticated enough to try to deceive you to get you into bed, god. I was just trying to seem reasonably normal and cool around my roommate’s new co-star who by complete coincidence was my celebrity crush of the last four years. It was way too uncool to reveal my alter ego to you.”

Blaine smiles, probably despite himself. “Can I tell you some of my favourites?”

“Oh god.”

It seems Blaine spent the better part of his evening delving deeply into the fandom mind of LimaBlaineFan, because he had screencapped some of Kurt’s oldest, and cringiest posts.

-Why isn’t he shirtless in that scene? The other guys are shirtless. Roy is hot. And no, I don’t think he’s embarrassed. 

“Well, you are right about that. I’m not camera shy.” 

-Thank God Blaine Anderson has a better fashion sense than Roy. Roy and his loose jeans and sweatpants - how would I even catch a glimpse? But did you see Blaine on that red carpet? Maroon suit, pants so tight. His ass is perfection.

-Blaine’s interview for Pride was perfection. He says we might even catch him out on the dance floors, dancing with some hotties. Maybe then he’ll be shirtless.

And of course, Blaine appreciated Kurt’s hard work on one of his most recent posts - The privileges and pitfalls of playing straight for an out gay actor: Quotes from Blaine Anderson’s interviews.

Kurt lets Blaine read each one, sitting silent in embarrassment and biting his lip through it all. It’s the least he deserves. Just as Blaine finishes his list and Kurt is about to go into profuse apology once again,  they’re interrupted.

A young woman who looks about seventeen scurries quickly up to their table. “Hi. I’m sorry. I know you’re busy. I’m just such a huge fan of Sing! And now That’s So Rachel-” - If that was a fan test, she passed. She knows both shows. That’s a minimum. “Can I get a pic with you?”

“Of course. Thank you so much for watching.” Blaine takes her phone like a pro and angles it so he and the girl are both in it, Kurt trying to avoid being the photobomb in the background. Blaine turns back to him as the girl leaves. 

“I guess that would’ve been me a few months ago.”

“For you, I might have even given a hug. Or the coveted kiss on the cheek. I always try to connect with the gay guy fans.”

“You succeeded?” Kurt tries and Blaine laughs. At least the energy between them is better. Much better. Like he won’t have to hide in a corner if he’s ever at an event with Blaine again or anything like that.

“I guess I did.”

“The first time I met you, you told me that a fan is not a friend.”

“I did.”

“Would you have asked me out if you had known from the beginning?”

“Probably not. Against the rules.”

“That’s what I thought.” There’s an awkward pause - Kurt’s not sure there’s anything else to say and apparently Blaine agrees because he switches the topic to the latest script and his excitement about working with Patti Lupone - who apparently, even gets to slap him. By the time they leave the café, Kurt feels relieved. He’s survived his first break up. Not that they were really together. He doesn’t have the energy to grieve the loss of kissing, and touching, and ironically still not having seen Blaine shirtless (pantless, yes). He’s sure it will hit him like a ton of bricks after he finally gets a real night of sleep, and then he will have Rachel prepare the cheesecake. Again. 

He crawls into bed early that night, grateful the shock and awful adrenaline of the last two days has finally left his body. His phone buzzes as he closes his light and he plans to text Mercedes back to tell her he’ll update her tomorrow. But it’s not Mercedes.

Blaine: Some rules are made to be broken.

[littleorangecactus]

Go with your head

This is really long but it is a slow burning parrlyn fic with Aragon and Jane acting as parental figures to Anne.

This is for @politics-notmything per her request for fluff to wake up to!

“Jesus FUCKING Christ!!” Anne screams as slams her head against her pillow. She has spent the past half hour trying to devise a plan to ask Cathy out, and it hasn’t gone anywhere. It wasn’t like it was bad enough that she likes her best friend, she also can’t get up the courage to ask her on a date. Suddenly there are footsteps surging up the stairs, yanking ion her door.

“WATCH YOUR LANGUAG-“ Aragon and Jane came to an abrupt halt at the sight of their little gremlin in tears. “Oh sweetie what’s wrong??” Jane coos as she rushes to wrap her arms around Anne. The teenager sniffles, moving to wipe away her tears so as to not get made fun of. “Nothing,” she mumbles into Jane's shoulder. “What was that darling?” Jane asks gently, stroking Anne’s hair while she looks to an un-amused Aragon by the door. “I can’t talk about it alright!” She screams, pulling away from Jane and shuffling into the corner of her bed. “You need to watch yourself Boleyn!” Catherine steps close to the bed, making sure she’s there if this goes wrong for Jane.

Anne falters, taking in the two faces of the women before her. Aragon has a look of confusion and unsteadiness, watching to see what Anne will do next. She huffed to herself, saying she didn’t care about what Aragon thought of her, even though she did. But the look of hurt and sadness on Jane’s face is enough to do her in. Big, pooling tears come fast from her eyes as she starts to sob, the anxiety coursing through her over this date getting too much. Jane immediately grabs her and wraps her in her arms, Aragon joins in to rub curled on her back for comfort. “I..I’m so stupid!” She cries, leaning into Catherine’s touch. “You are no such thing! What on earth makes you think that?!” Jane questions her, a socked look on her face. “I want to ask if Cathy will go out with me, but I can’t think of what to say. I keep thinking of the worst ideas, and I don’t even know if she even likes me yet!” Anne finally spills the secret that had gotten her so upset in the first place.

In seconds, Jane is back to cooing her and she strokes her hair, while Catherine gets stiff. “You want to do what exactly?” She asks Anne, looking at her with a glare only Anne could get. “I... I know you don’t like me, but this is serious. I really like her, like I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t see her smile everyday. Like I couldn’t picture life without her, I don’t even want to ask her because I know this could hurt the group! But every time I look at her and think it couldn’t ever work, Cathy looks at me with a soft smile, and I fall for her dorky self all over again.” Anne is begging Aragon at this point, trying to get her to see her intentions. Aragon softens a little, putting up a front for the girl. “Well did you even think about things she likes?” She questions softly. Anne’s head whips around. “I know she loves books and coffee. I know she doesn’t know that I watch as she likes to sit outside and watch the birds fly around as she works on her books. I know she likes quiet things most of the time, I know she doesn’t agree with sports, I know she likes heartfelt gifts.” Anne lists the facts about Cathy that she knew on her fingers, proud that she could remember them all.

Jane looks at her with tear filled eyes, seeing Anne so open and soft about someone wasn’t a sight many saw. “Well darling, why don’t you put some of those things together? I’m sure you could use her love of books, food, and the outdoors to get her to say yes!” Her eyes brighten as she tries to help the little girl in her arms. “Set up something special for her, things that she would like around her.” Catherine gives a slight smile as she adds her input into this. Knowing her goddaughter very well, she could help give the right answers. Anne’s head shoots up and she jumps out of bed and goes into her closet. “I GOT IT. I KNOW WHAT IM GONNA DO!” Digging around she finds her favorite sweater, throwing it on her body. Pulling her hair up in messy space buns, she turns back to the bed. “I’m gonna set up a picnic with her favorite foods and some books so we can relax in the park!” She smiles as she relays her idea, nervous at the reactions. Both queens on the bed smile brightly at her, nodding their heads happily. “If you would like dear, I could go get the basket ready while you ask Cathy to go with you?” Jane offers, with a big smile. “I will make sure all other things needed will be there as well” Catherine stands, pulling Anne into her. “I know you won’t, but if you hurt her, I do know where you sleep.” She whispers quietly.

Jane shushes her and they both go their separate ways to get the surprise ready. Anne was so excited as she walked over to Cathy’s office. Knocking quickly, she stands there waiting for Cathy. “What can I do for you?” Come a voice from the doorway, as Cathy opens it for Anne. “I would like it if you would come with me somewhere. It’s a surprise, but you’re gonna love it. I promise.” Anne smiles as she grabs Cathy’s hand. The sixth queen giving her a questioning look before the puppy dog eyes set in. “Alright alright!” She huffs, turning back into her room to get ready. Anne beams as she waits for Catherine to get ready, heading towards the kitchen to wait. “In here are some of her favorite foods; different fruits, grilled cheese sandwiches, a little thermos of coffee, all ready!” Jane smiles brightly as she hands it to her. Aragon comes in with a blanket and 2 of Cathy's favorite books that were left in the living room. “Here are some other supplies you need. Be careful, but have a good time.” She smiles softly at the second queen before her. Anne’s eyes begin to tear up at the generosity of her fellow queens as Cathy comes into view.

“I’m ready to go, but I swear Boleyn, if this is anywhere near the stunt you pulled at the water park, you’re sooo dead.” She exclaims, walking over to the other three women. “It won’t be I promise, and I said I was sorry for drenching you’re book! I was aiming for your head, you moved!” Anne throws back at her lightly. Cathy rolls her eyes, while looking at the basket in the teens hand. “Okay everything is set, let’s get going!” Grabbing Parr’s hand, she pulls her to the car, setting the supplies in the back. Looking over to her she laughs, “This won’t take but a minute to get there so don’t get too comfy.” They pull out of the driveway and start towards the park. The radio playing lightly is the only noise as Anne focuses on driving and Cathy watches the world pass by the window. After a bit, the get to the park and Anne jumps out to get the basket of goodies before opening Parr’s door. Looking at the girl for permission, she grabs Cathy’s hand and they walk to an open, quiet area. Setting out the blanket and the books, Anne sits down and gestures Cathy to follow. The fellow queen stands there staring at her. “What’s all this?” Cathy asks with confusion covering her face. “Well..I wanted to ask you if maybe, you wanted to, and you don’t have to, but maybe go out with me?” Anne looks up as she says these words, innocence and fear written on her face.

Looking at the scene before her, Cathy sits down and grabs Anne’s hand. “Wait I don’t understand. You did all of this, just to ask me if I’d go out with you?” She looks into Anne’s eyes and sees a nervous girl looking back at her. “Ye- well I’m not sure... you know what forget it, this was a bad idea!” Anne turns away blushing and hurt at the questioning look and starts to gather things up. “Wait! wait! I’m not upset! I just..I didn’t know you felt this way!” Cathy grabs her hands to stop her. Anne looks at her again, “ I have wanted to ask you out for about 4 months now, I just didn’t know how.” She confesses. Her shoes now more interesting than they were three seconds ago, she looks down, not daring to look at Catherine. Cathy smiles and tilts Anne’s chin to look at her. “No one has ever done anything like this for me. Ever. Not Henry, not Thomas, nothing even close. I can’t believe you went through all this trouble for me. Anne I have likes you for ages, I just didn’t think you’d like me back!” She scoffs with a laugh, looking into Anne’s eyes. “Of course I will go out with you, I’d like nothing more. You put so much effort and time into this, the caring alone makes you so special to me.” Smiling at her, she leans in and pecks Anne’s cheek. The fellow queen turning a beet red, smiles brightly back at her. “I brought your favorite foods and books so we can stay here and have a nice lunch before heading home, if you want. Jane and Aragon helped set it up, with only minimal threats to my life!” She jokes, while grabbing the snacks out of the basket. “This is so sweet of you, of the queens to help as well. Remind me to talk to them about those threats though.” She said with a faux angry look. Giggling softly she leans into Anne as they enjoy their day with each other, just sitting in the other’s company.

Packing up and heading home, the pair held hands the entire way, Anne with a dopey look on her face, and Cathy with a bright smile. Pulling into the driveway, they head inside towards the living room, talking softly to each other. Looking up at the noise, Jane smiles as she and Catherine pause the movie they were watching. “Did you girls have fun?” She asks with a knowing smile, the interlocked hands a dead give away. “We did actually. I’m surprised to say it was the best date I have ever been on.” Cathy replies with a smile, looking at Anne as she spoke. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourselves. Now you two come join us, it’s movie night and the other two are coming soon!” Aragon smiles as she snaps back into the order of their routine, her smile shows how happy she is for the two young girls. The pair roll their eyes but head towards the couch, getting comfy as the noise around them blurs out, the feeling of each other’s hands all that matters in that moment.

The end!

I hope you like it, and I’m so sorry that it was so long but I needed the angst to get to the cute mess that the pairing is. If you have anything you want to change, please let me know!

[jdmslut-red]

Hello everyone! Quick update. So I’m sure you’ve noticed I’m finally starting to write asks again. As usual, I must apoalize for the wait. Thankfully, I’ve found my mojo to write again. However, I’m extremely busy with my work and personal life so I have no idea or time frame as to when I’m gonna be writing asks for the time being. And as I said on my last update, I’m currently stepping away from the on going roleplays for the time being. I will finish the ones I’ve already started writing for. But as I said, after I’m finally done I will no longer be writing on going roleplays just asks or one time takeovers whatever you wanna call it.

I’m really sorry and I hate to do this ☹️ I appreciate everyone who msg me or send me your ideas. But there’s just so many of you and it’s just not possible to get to everyone. Asks are shorter, so I would like to keep up with them instead. Anyways, I’m adding another character to the ask list. I have no idea why but every time I try to change the ask button it doesn’t save, it just goes back to the previous setting. So here are all the character you can send asks and requests for:

Negan (The Walking Dead)

Max (The Resident)

Henry Delarue (The Salvation)

The Comedian (Watchmen)

Patrick Sullivan (Accidental Husband)

Denny Duquette (Grey’s Anatomy)

JD Richer (The Extant)

Franklin Clay (The Losers)

Ike Evans (Magic City)

And of course Jeff himself ❤️

Quick disclaimer... now I’ve said in the past I was kind of uneasy for writing as Jeffrey himself at first. However, I feel confident enough to write for him now. It’s all fiction and I don’t mean any disrespect to Jeffrey himself or anyone for that matter. That goes for all his characters as well, especially his darker roles.

I don’t really like to go out of character even if someone sends me something emotional. I write back as I imagine the character would react on those circumstances. So please take no offense. It’s fiction! And it’s sad that I even have to write this... but there are some “interesting” people that would take a fictional response personal. And I would also like add, yes I write giant monologues for Negan because he’s the easiest character for me to write for. (Spoiler alert I’m the female version of Negan Incase you hadn’t fucking caught on yet 😂) And let’s face it Negan never shuts up. If I narorrate him it’s gonna be super fucking long. Other characters I write with narration 1st or 3rd person depending on what I’m writing. I have occasionally done that for Negan as well if I felt I needed to add some action. Anyways, that’s all. Sorry for the extremely long post.

Love You Guys! Xoxox 🤗

Jdmslut-red

[chaotic-creatures]

All That We Are (Chapter One)

Written by: @gizmo-the-gay

Fandom: IT (2017)

Pairing(s): slowburn!Stanley Uris x OC,

Slight!Richie Tozier x OC, Patrick Hockstetter x OC

Word Count: 1,716

Warnings: swearing, Patrick being himself

Tag List:

•••••

Julia Martinez was many things. She was smart, she was pretty and she was a good friend. So, when Patrick Hockstetter said he would stop terrorizing her best friend, Richie Tozier, if she went out with him, Julia agreed. She agreed because she didn’t want Richie to get the same treatment he got all the time at home.

Richie had mostly everyone convinced that he had a normal home life. But Julia was observant and too smart for her own good. Plus she literally can hear his mom screaming at him from her house which was right next to his. There was no way Richie could hide the abuse from his friend, he knew that, but he could build up walls and pretend it never happened. No matter how much that frustrated Julia, she didn’t push him. He would come to her on his own when things got bad.

Julia was an eighth grader, she was considered an outcast and got picked on frequently by Greta Keene and her goons. For some reason though, the Bowers gang never touched her. It was weird considering she hung out with Richie and they bullied him and his other friends constantly. Even if it was just Richie and Julia walking home from the arcade where they spent most of their time, Henry and his friends would pick on Richie profusely but refuse to even glance her way.

That was how she got into the position she was in now. Julia and Richie decided to meet up before they headed home. As they walked they were oblivious to the blue Trans Am following them. Richie talked non stop about the newest game the Arcade put in a while ago. Julia smiled at her friend nodding along to what he was saying. She hadn’t seen Richie for a few days considering she was getting over being sick. But just because she was gone for a few days didn’t mean she neglected her friend when he needed her. As Richie talked highly about this new game, Julia’s eyes scanned over his being. She didn’t miss the small scratch on his cheek near his eye or the busted lip he was sporting.

Her eyes moved around their surroundings and that’s when she noticed the Trans Am parked across the street. Before she could even warn Richie, he was grabbed roughly by the shoulder and pulled back. Julia’s eyes widen when she hears a small popping sound and Richie cry in pain. She turns and sees Patrick Hockstetter smirking down at her best friend. Richie was holding his shoulder in pain and struggled to get up as Belch held him down with his foot on his chest. In panic, Julia launched herself at Belch and punched him as hard as she could. Her fist hit his cheek and his head turned to the side on impact. She ignored the pain in her hand as she watches Belch stumble away from Richie. It was almost like everything was going in slow motion. Victor went to check on Belch and Patrick looked from Richie to Julia was a crazed smile on his face.

“Wow. I did not expect that at all. The princess really does have a fire in her.” Patrick says amused. He didn’t even check on his friend as he reached down and pulled Richie up by the collar of his stupid Hawaiian shirt. Julia swallowed thickly as her eyes dart from Belch who spit out some blood and rubbed his cheek to Richie who’s glasses fell off and were now on the grass where he fell. Her eyes land on Patrick as he grips Richie’s shirt.

“Let him go Hockstetter!” Julia yells out getting ready to fight if she had to. This only peaks Patrick’s interest in the girl even more.

“Who? This fag? What’s he to you princess?” He asks looking from Richie to Julia. He tried to read Julia like a book like he did with everyone else but she held her composure and didn’t back down.

“He’s the only friend I got right now! Now let him go.” She growls in desperation and frustration. Hearing the word ‘friend’ made Patrick lick his lips and smirk at the girl. Now was the time to give her a choice. He took out a knife and clicked it open. The blade comes out fast and it shines in the light of the sun that was now setting. Julia’s breath hitches in her throat as she eyes the blade. Richie struggled and tried to get away but the grip on his shirt only got tighter. Now he kind of wished it was Henry Bowers and not Patrick. At least Bowers would leave a few marks. Patrick on the other hand would probably kill him instead. Or leave him to bleed to death.

“I’m gonna make you a deal princess...” Patrick says as he holds the knife up to Richie’s neck, “either you be my girlfriend. Or. Your little friend gets to be the main target of ours for the rest of his life here in Derry.” Patrick says watching as Julia gasps. Sure it was hard to read her face but her eyes gave her away quickly. She was scared. And Patrick was loving the new look. “Come in princess. What’s it gonna be? We don’t got all night.” Patrick says as he puts pressure of the knife on Richie’s neck. Richie looked at her with pleading eyes. He knew what she was going to choose and he just hoped she would be smarter than that.

Julia’s mind goes haywire. Every thought she had running through her mind so fast she was getting a head ache. Her face suddenly hardens and she looks at Richie with apologetic eyes. She looked at Patrick with her icy blue eyes and spoke with confidence.

“I will be your girlfriend on one condition.” Julia says looking at him dead in the eyes. Patrick nodded for her to go on, “never bully him again. That goes for all of the Bowers gang. And I swear to god Hockstetter, if I hear about any of you guys bullying him behind my back, I will fucking end you.” She growls the last few words. Patrick lets go of Richie and holds out the hand not gripping the knife.

“Deal?” He questions waiting for her to take his hand. Julia steps forward and takes his hand. He smirks widely and grips her hand and then tugs her close to his body. Julia gasps in surprise and misses the smirks on both Victor and Belch’s faces. Patrick takes in her scent of lavender. He presses his face into her hair and takes a deep inhale while looking at Richie who was now standing with his glasses on. Julia didn’t bother to struggle so she let Patrick creepily sniff her and grip her waist roughly. After a bit he pulls away and looks down at his new girlfriend.

“I’ll let you walk home with the fag tonight. But don’t expect it ever again.” Patrick says before slapping her butt and walking back to the Trans Am with his friends.

The walk back to their houses was deathly silent. Julia didn’t know what to say but she knew Richie was pissed, it was practically dripping off of his aura.

“I can’t believe you...” Richie says as they approach their homes, “I can’t believe you agreed to be that psycho’s girlfriend!” He yells out in frustration. “Why the hell would you do that?!” He asks his voice raising every word he spoke.

“It was either that or you get bullied the rest of your life! You don’t know if the bullying would have gotten worse or not! I couldn’t just stand there and let you get hurt Richie!” Julia exclaims, tears welling up in her eyes, “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if your bullying worsened and I was the cause of it! You get shit at home already! You don’t need Bowers and his stupid friends making everything worse!” She cries.

“You might want to watch what you say about them now! Considering you are dating one of Bowers’ friends!” Richie yells. “Did you not see the looks that Patrick and the other two were giving when you accepted? They planned this Julia! Now you are just a pawn in their stupid game!” He screams. He didn’t care who heard now. He was beyond pissed at her for not thinking and for him for being a wimp. He was so angry that he wasn’t thinking straight, “god! You’re so fucking stupid!” He yells. That did it for Julia, the tears started to stream down her face and she started to sniffle and whimper.

“Go to hell Richie Tozier.” She says through small cries and turns her back walking into her house and slamming the door. The one person that always told her how intelligent she was and boosted her self esteem, had also been the person to shatter it. Julia ignored her mother and father. She stormed to her room and plopped down on her bed. She buries her face in her pillow and lets out a scream of frustration, anger and sadness. After she calms a bit she lays still and looks around her room. Everything she had reminded her of Richie and Richie reminded her of what he said. She grabbed the picture frame that held a Polaroid of Richie and Julia with their arms around each other. Looking at it she growls and throws it into an empty box that was near her bed.

After getting rid of everything that screamed her friendship with Richie, she went to take a shower to calm down. She gets out after a while and slips on some pajamas before making her way back to her room. She was exhausted from everything that went on that afternoon. As she laid in bed she thought of what was going to happen tomorrow.

She wasn’t looking forward to the next day. The day she will be officially Patrick Hockstetter’s girlfriend. It was a big step for her, she wasn’t planning on having a boyfriend anytime soon and she definitely wasn’t planning on not being friends with Richie anymore. But what can she do?

Life goes on.

A/n: first story on my new and improved blog! Uh the title of the story is of my most recent favorite song “All That We Are” by Blue October. Let me know if you would like to be on the tag list! I will make sure I add you when I upload the other chapters! Either send me a message, comment on here or send an ask!