#FUCK A RAP BATTLE THIS A LONG LIFE BATTLE WITH YOURSELF????????????? if someone ended a song ab me w that line

[crunchycrystals]

yall should i listen to tpab

[ghstsrock]

on a completely unrelated note to anything I will ever post ever.

If anything Kendrick is saying about Drake is even slightly true, that is a life sentence.

tw for mentions of SA and pdf files

It’s not about a weak fucking diss from nasally Canadian, it’s about a decade long history of pedophilic behavior from one of the most popular rappers in the industry to date.

It’s about the potential of having so many SA allegations that when your house is searched for on a neighborhood watch app, there are red pins hovering above it.

Pins that imply that you and the people you live with are violent child predators.

It is about the possibility that the “Meet The Grahams” cover image is of Drake’s suitcase and was taken inside Drake’s house.

It’s the fact that a man can rap that you don’t like women and not imply that you’re gay but instead claim that you like minors.

It’s the fact that we are watching someone not only destroy someone’s career but their family, social status, everything just with one song.

Kendrick’s diss track is fucking scary. The planning, the callousness, the intent. The best he used, the way he made his voice sound, the underlying reality of it all.

That diss track was not a diss track, it was calculated attack intended to end someone’s life.

“This isn’t a rap battle, this is a longlife battle with yourself.”

[egcdeath]

finders keepers

summary: did captain america just steal your cat?

pairing: steve rogers x reader

word count: 2.5k

warnings: tooth rotting fluff, strangers to lovers

author’s note: it’s been way too long since i wrote some pure, self indulgent fluff. this has been quite the refreshing experience for me but i think it’s back to our regularly scheduled program after this ;)

you can find my masterlist and taglist here

Miso had an air of arrogance that you admired. She took the world by its kitty balls, doing whatever she pleased whenever she pleased. Your cat left the apartment for sometimes days at a time, and frequently led male cats to your door. To you, your cat was more like a roommate than a pet, hogging up most of your bed, standing on the counter while you attempted to make food for yourself, and leaving most areas dirtier than she originally found it. 

Okay, maybe you were personifying your cat a little too much. But after moving out to D.C., you were unspeakably lonely. Most days, it felt like Miso was all you had, and that you were all Miso had (save for her army of cat boyfriends). 

This made things all the more concerning for you when you’d realized that you hadn’t seen your cat companion in five days. Five whole days without the comforting vibration of her purr, her ungodly hours of wakeup calls demanding to be played with, or pet. The cherry on top was that the cat food outside your door appeared to be completely untouched.

In your frenzied realization of your missing cat, your mind raced with a thousand different terrible situations your dear Miso could’ve found herself in. You frantically clicked through pictures of her on an online album and attempted to find a photo that would capture her white fur with large blobs of auburn, and her vibrant blue eyes to put on your ‘MISSING’ sign. The longer you clicked, the more that you began to worry that she had been caught and kidnapped by some terrible person with bad intentions. 

You finally threw together the poster, sending it to your phone so that you could print it off at the OfficeMax down the street. Luckily for you, you didn’t make it that far, as the moment you began to lock the closed door of your apartment, you saw the unmistakable figure of your cat. 

In the arms of your neighbor.

Now, you’d never met Steve. He was an Avenger, Captain America to be exact, and you were just… you. You’d convinced yourself that attempting to introduce yourself to him would ultimately end in failure, and an embarrassing one at that. Maybe he’d scoff and walk away, or call Tony Stark in front of you and tell him about the crazy woman he just encountered. 

But none of that mattered. Captain America was stealing your fucking cat. 

“Excuse me, sir?” You asked, stepping away from your door and approaching the Greek God of a man to the right of you. 

“Oh, hey! We must be n-“

“You have my cat,” you said bluntly.

“I’m sorry, what?” Steve seemed to do a double take

“My cat, y’know, the feline in your arms.”

“Well, maybe we just have similar looking cats. This is Arabella.”

You nearly scoffed at this, shaking your head. First, Captain America kidnapped your cat, and now he’s trying to convince you that it’s not your cat? Yeah, you’d know Miso from a mile away. And what kind of name is Arabella?

“Arabella is a great name for her,” Steve retorted, pulling the cat closer to his chest. Shit, did you say that out loud?

“Well I think it’s time for Miso to come back home,” the cat’s ears perked at this, and she glanced over at you. The sight of you made her wiggle and hop out of Steve’s tight embrace, landing on her feet and trotting over to you. The damn cat rubbed her face against your calf and purred as if she hadn’t been cheating on you for long enough to have gained a new name.

You squatted down and rubbed the back of your hand against her cheek, and shook your head at your pet, “you’re getting put on probation, young lady.” 

She didn’t seem to mind, pacing back and forth around you. You glanced up and saw Steve with a rather neutral expression on his face, as if he was masking whatever it was that he was feeling.

“I’m sorry about that, ma’am. Uh, maybe I’ll see you both around sometime,” disappointment coated his every word before he opened up his apartment door and promptly closed it behind him. 

You were surprised at how quickly he conceded, but you weren’t particularly mad about it either. You weren’t sure what you’d do if you never got your Miso back.

——

A whole day later, you’d been in your apartment typing up an email when a soft rapping at your door got your attention.

“Just a second!” you called, hopping up and hurrying to the door. When you opened it, Steve was standing in front of you, waiting with an oversized box in his hands.

“These are some of Ar- Miso?” he trailed off, waiting for you to confirm the name, and you gave him a tiny nod. “These are some of Miso’s toys. I just figured if she’s not staying at my place anymore…”

As if on cue, Miso strolled up to the door, and stretched her arms up on Steve’s leg, begging to be picked up. The man glanced at you for approval, and you gave a dismissive shrug before he set down the box, and held up the cat.

Steve frowned as he held her, and frankly, it pulled on your heart strings. You had to remind yourself that this man had been holding your cat captive for at least a week, and at most… who knows. 

She clearly had a connection with him, and that was what intrigued you most. Miso was a very picky cat, and it was only occasionally that she found someone that she genuinely liked, let alone wanted to be picked up by. If you continued to watch the display of affection in front of you, you might just cave.

“Uh, I left something in the oven for a little too long, so I should probably go get that. Thanks for stopping by.”

Steve nodded, understanding that it was time for him to exit.

——

You should’ve seen this coming the minute Miso was back in your home. You stepped out of the shower one morning to find your front door slightly ajar, and your animal nowhere to be found. 

You huffed, frustrated that just three days after you told yourself that your cat was completely indoor from that point on, she had escaped. She could literally be anywhere at this point.

In a whirlwind, you threw on a sweatshirt and pants, ready to go print out the missing posters that you had designed just a few days ago. As you slipped on sneakers, you realized something very crucial. She might just be at Steve’s place.

You groaned aloud, rubbing your temple as you thought of how difficult your cat was being. You were becoming a bit nervous to approach Steve, you hadn’t gotten off to the greatest start, and if your cat wasn’t there, things might just be awkward.

Regardless, you knew you needed to try, so you exited your own home, and knocked on the door of Steve’s.

A few moments later, he appeared with your cat in tow. 

“Hey!” he paused and trailed off, “I never got your name before.”

“That’s what you care about right now?” you glanced down at your animal. “It’s Y/N, by the way.”

“Hi, Y/N. Miso and I were just enjoying breakfast, if you’d like to join us?”

Was Steve shooting his shot? 

“I appreciate your offer, but I think I’m alright. I have to get back to work, and my cat is still in your custody,” your eyes flickered down to the animal who stood proudly by his side. 

“Maybe some other time,” he shrugged. “You work from home?”

You nodded, then squatted down to get eye level with your cat. 

“I’m jealous,” he chuckled. “Alright, I’ll stop bothering you now. Bye Miso, see you around, Y/N.”

You picked up your cat, who briefly dug her nails into the ground in resistance before submitting to her capture. As you brought her back home, you couldn’t help but wonder if you’d made the right choice.

——

Ever since you’d discovered Miso, or Arabella’s secret life, it’s like you couldn’t stop noticing her connection to Steve. 

Some days, she’d be gone until the dead of night, when she’d meow and paw at your front door until you woke up. Other times she’d be laying in bed with you, and she smelled distinctly of your neighbor. Your cat had single handedly turned a stranger into a thoroughly integrated part of your life.

It was as if Miso was now your child, and Steve your ex-husband in a Cold War style custody battle, where Miso seemed to prefer her father. It was slightly disheartening. At the very least, you knew she was in good hands. 

You held a throw pillow to your chest while you watched a rerun of a sitcom on your television, procrastinating in your work for as long as you possibly could. The sound of a knock on your door pulled you from your trance, and as you peeked through the peephole of your door, you saw a slightly distorted Steve.

Opening up the door, you gave him just the faintest hint of a smile, “what’s up, neighbor? Need me to grab you some treats for Arabella, or something?”

“Kinda the opposite,” he gestured with his head down to the cat squirming in his hands. “I’m gonna be gone on a mission for the next week or so. I just wanted to let you know that if Miso gets out, she’s not with me.” 

Steve set her down on your carpet, and she happily collapsed at your feet, “keep her safe for me, alright?” 

——

You took a deep breath as you approached his door, hoping he hadn’t left just yet. You fiddled with the sticky note containing your number, and polaroid photo of your cat in your hand, considering turning around and scrapping the idea all together. 

It was silly to think that an Avenger would ever bother reaching out to you. You were probably overstepping anyway. Steve would think you were a freak and take full custody of your beloved Miso once and for all. 

Going against your better judgment, you set down the polaroid-note combo and quickly slid it under Steve’s door. Whatever happened happened.

The next morning, you were pleased to receive a notification from an unknown number. 

Send Miso pics?

You were more than happy to oblige. 

——

Over the course of Steve’s week-long mission, you’d sent several pictures and videos of your cat doing random things. Trying to get on the table, sleeping on top of your dryer, and even playing with one of the toys Steve provided.

Surprisingly, Steve wasn’t as dry of a texter as you thought he’d be. He was eating up all of the Miso content, and would occasionally even ask for you to send more photos. 

The final night of his mission, you were surprised when you received a FaceTime request, at first writing it off as a technical error (he was from a different time period, after all), but the follow up call demonstrated his intentions.

You cautiously picked up, the knot in your stomach growing as you did so, “hello?”

“Hi!” Steve greeted optimistically, the phone just a bit too close to his face. “Any Miso sightings?”

“Yeah, she’s actually sleeping on my foot right now,” you chuckled, flipping the camera so you could show her off in your dim, lamp-lit bedroom. 

“So cute,” he hummed, “how have you been?”

“Me?” you laughed quietly, “I’m not the one on a top secret mission in god-knows-where. But I’ve been fine. How are you?”

“Honestly? I’m pretty tired. Kinda can’t wait to get home and see you and Miso,” he said in a quieter voice. 

Your brain stalled out for a second. Steve was excited to see you? You hoped that you were reading this the right way, as you were more than willing to go with whatever it was that Steve was putting down.

“We’ll be expecting an immediate visit from you, then. I’ll let Miso know that she needs to start kneading a bread loaf for you as soon as possible. Any idea of what time you’re getting into D.C.?” 

“Probably late morning, but it really depends on when Natasha gets up.”

You had a moment where you realized that you were talking to a real life superhero, and he had just referenced his friend… who was also a superhero. You paused for a second. 

“Y/N? Hey, you still here?”

“Yeah! Yeah. I just zoned out for a sec. Well, you better get here safe or else someone is going to be very annoyed with you.”

Steve laughed softly across the line, and you adjusted yourself in bed, yawning softly.

“I’m sorry, I forgot how late it is over there,” Steve apologized.

“Don’t worry, I was up anyway. One of Miso’s boyfriends is pretty upset that he can’t come in here and spend the night with her.”

“Which one?”

“I think that grey one. I don’t really know what his voice sounds like, but she’s been leading him on lately,” you responded, eliciting a laugh from both you and Steve. 

“Try to get some sleep, okay? I don’t need you snoozing while I come to visit our girl.”

“You are something else, Steve Rogers,” you said fondly, adjusting your phone one last time as you hugged a pillow. “I’ll get to sleep. See you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow. Sweet dreams, Y/N.”

You hung up, and cuddled into your pillow with a sigh. Calling your dreams that night sweet was an understatement. 

——

You seemed to be Steve’s first stop after his mission, stopping at your door with his duffel bag still attached to his arm, and wearing a slightly dirty and much too small white t-shirt.

Expecting his presence, you quickly got the door and gave him a toothy grin. 

“It’s so good to see your face without a screen,” Steve commented. Internally, you swooned. 

“I could say the same for you, Steve.”

Miso had been summoned by the sound of Steve’s voice, practically sprinting to the door and meowing at him on the top of her lungs. 

“Miso really appreciates you coming here to see her first,” you added as he lifted her up and quietly cooed into her wrinkly head. “Feel free to take her for the next few days. I’m sure she’s getting tired of me.”

Steve shook his head at you, and grinned, “that’s so sweet of you,” he briefly looked down at his wristwatch, and his brows raised.

“Shit. I have to go, but I promise to see you soon. I’m glad to see that everything is well. Take care, Y/N,” Steve began making his way back to his own apartment, and you watched him with the semblance of a frown. 

You really needed to stop longing for the unobtainable. 

——

You hadn’t heard from Steve in a few days following his return, and your brief interaction with him. Part of you wondered if he was avoiding you for some  reason. 

Your phone lit up the room as it went off, and you grabbed it to look at the notification you received.

A picture of Steve grinning with Miso sitting on his chest looked back at you with a simple message connected to it.

Wanna come over? :D

[heavenbarnes]

it's not a threat, it's a warning

Margot Robbie x Female Reader

Warnings/Contains: porn without plot (literally sex scene after sex scene), adultery, dry humping, titty sucking, oral sex (female receiving), fingering, pregnancy, semi-public sex, swearing, dirty talk, gentle degradation, riding (sex toys), 

Word Count: 7,606

what’d that pretty girl from stranger things say? “ask for forgiveness, not permission” so this is me asking for forgiveness and just reminding you that you don’t have to read it if you don’t want to x

Your universe started and ended with Margot, that was for sure.

The moment you took the job on this film, and you saw your co-star sitting across the long table from you, your world would never be the same again. You’d known it from the moment she’d grinned at you, teeth pressed gently against a polished nail.

Your heart had leapt straight into your mouth, though you wouldn’t let it show. You channeled your most courageous smirk, letting your eyes cast over her, unabashedly.  

From then on, things only continued to change and you found yourself measuring your time on this planet in before Margot and after Margot. The newest turn of the century.

Playing “the girl’s best friend” by her side was both a blessing and a curse. To get that close to her, to mimic the confidante and the one to see her vulnerability was a prize you’d hold close to your chest. But how do you act away the raw feeling of heat that pulls you towards her whenever you see her.

You find a way, you suppress it, well enough you would say. Nobody else seems to notice, and that’s exactly how you want, how you need it. You felt as if your emotions were wound together in a tight bow and she had each end in two of her slender fingers, ready to pull you apart whenever she felt.

Margot saw right through you, she saw the way you battled each day to keep your thoughts down your throat. However, she’d grown bored in the past few months and was steadily on the look out for her newest interest.

Her interests looked an awful lot like you.

You couldn’t lie, a part of you also knew exactly what she was doing. You weren’t dumb, you let her pick you apart and play to each of your hidden desires. Who were you to deny a woman like her?

You were the glass, and she was the blower. You let her ignite you with molten heat, moulding you into whatever she needed you to be.

A hot day, set in the middle of a cornfield, frustrations were running high. The heat whipped past your face, tendrils of hair stuck to your forehead against the beads of perspiration. You felt a mess, crawling in your skin, wanting nothing more than to peel off each layer until you felt the cool relief.

Of course Margot looked not a hair out of place, standing on her mark and ready to have you all speechless with a performance for the ages. What would go down in your history books is the way that single bead of sweat rolled down her neck and past the collar of her shirt, you wanted to chase it.

It was that scene, she goes back to find her childhood home but it’s gone. She collapses, screaming into the void. You cling onto her as she falls into the crops.

Knowing your bodies would be pressed to another as you held her weight. Knowing the way the silk of her skin would feel against yours. Her scent would overwhelm you. It was nearly too much.

But here you were filming it, going like clockwork as you meet your marks each time. She launches herself into your arms, and she fits like a glove. It was like your hands were made to hold her. You don’t feel a strain.

This was where she was always made to land.

As soon as you hear that cut, you’re on a war path to your trailer. The more you’re out here, the harder it is to think. You need to be locked behind a door where you cannot make choices that might ruin lives.

The cold water you snatch from the basket on your way saves a life. Slamming the trailer door shut behind you and plopping yourself down on the window seat at the end. The water runs down your throat and cools your heart.

You’re allowed to think for a moment, think about anything other than-

Her figure appears in the doorway of your trailer, closing it shut softly behind her. Everything about her is soft, her movements, her voice, her skin under your hands. She makes a quick stride in front of you.

“How are you?” She plays with the robe of yours that hangs on the wall beside her.

“I’m good, how is your husband?”

The chirp of a giggle sounds from her lips, eyes rolling as she funnels the silk between her fingers. She brings the fabric to her face, running it under her nose. The thought of her taking in your own scent? Your moving the water bottle between your legs to cool down.

“I don’t think you give a fuck?”

“You’re right, I don’t.”

She takes the garment off the hanger, sliding it over her shoulders. She dips her head back, long hair brushes against the back of it. Is she marking your belongings? What is she playing at?

“Then why do you ask, baby?”

Your fingers squeeze tighter around the bottle, almost enough to have it bubbling over. You watch her tiptoe around your space, taking in everything, taking up everything. There isn’t a square of space that she hasn’t made her own.

“I thought it’d be a deterrent.”

“And that’s what you want, for me to be deterred?”

“Fuck off, Margot.”

Her giggle was disarming, you physically felt your muscles loosening with the melodic sound of her existence. 

“Come on, you don’t mean that!” She cooed, walking towards you. “You get mean when you’re defensive.”

Your clothing, on her body, billowed behind her as she made her way over to you. Your eyes found the bottle in your fingers, desperate to keep your attention on anything else. Her fingers came into your view, taking the drink from your grasp and into her own.

Your gaze traveled up and to the crisp white blouse she was wearing. Without a flinch, she tipped the drink straight over her chest, the water saturating the fabric and splattering as it hit the floor of your trailer.

Your gulp was the next most audible thing in that small space, just slightly louder than the blood rushing in your ears. You knew what was about to happen, and you knew that you weren’t going to be strong enough to stop it.

“Oh no, this is ruined.” She threw the bottle over her shoulder as she looked down at her front. “Help me take this off?”

Your hands moved at the speed of light, coming up to her and gripping the damp fabric in your hands. In one motion you pulled her towards you, and in the other you tugged outwards. The buttons flew into the air as the most gentle skin was exposed to you.

Margot fell forward into you, shuffling the clothes off her arms and into a pile on the floor. Your hands secured onto her waist, pulling her into your lap and flush against you. You moved up to her chest, cupping her through the padding of her bra.

“My husband is good, but he’s never this good.”

“Shut up.”

Your growl brought a smile onto her lips, baring those perfect teeth to you as she wiggled her hips. Your fingers gripped the cups of her bra, pulling them down swiftly and exposing her chest. It was her incentive to reach around and un-clip it, you were busying yourself with the taste of her mouth.

Her tongue slid soft against yours as your lips met, her mouth so hot and wet and undeniably perfect. There wasn’t a lot in her that couldn’t be described as perfect. There was no reason on earth that someone should look like, act like, feel like this. But here Margot was.

Your fingers twisted around her nipples, tweaking at them to elicit a squeal from her. That kind that made her rut her hips against you, reminding you of the dangerous heat that was just radiating in your trousers. 

Margot’s fingers threaded into your hair, nails dragging against your scalp and making you purr. She pulled your head away from hers, getting a good look at your blown our eyes and reddened lips.

She pushed your head down, bringing your lips to her nipple for you to latch around. Her head tipped back, a delicious moan slipping out and filling your ears. Her idea of paradise, you hot against her whilst you suckled at her breast. 

Your hands fell to her ass, gripping at her gently so you could pull her even closer to your core. You just wanted to feel her grind against it, give a little friction to your clit, put you out of your misery.

A rap of knuckles at the door was sure to poke holes in this one.

“Mmph!” You called out, never releasing her from your mouth.

“Girls, we’re lighting the next scene, we need you out here!”

It wasn’t a groan of pleasure this time, frustration filled you as you were forced to pull away from her honey-sweet skin. She patted your hair back, soothing you quietly before stepping off of your lap.

You stood as she did, reaching over the back of a chair to find her a shirt. She slipped it on, your eyes trying to avoid how sweet she looked bathed in your clothes. She stepped forward, nearly nose to nose with you.

You couldn’t help but jump, her hand moving swiftly to cup your cunt through your trousers. A pathetic whimper fell out, earning a cheeky grin from Margot.

“Girls night tonight?”

-

And the girls night went well into the morning, visions of pillow flights and rolling about in cotton sheets. You sat back against your headboard, glass of wine in one hand, your other arm draped around Margot’s bare shoulders.

Her head lay against your chest, rising and falling with each breath. Her soft hair tickled you gently as you lay in silence. So much of your time together lay in silence, unable to say what you possibly needed to.

Margot sensed a change in your breathing, a change in the way your heart beat within your chest. She rose slightly, gazing up to meet your eyes. Her gentle smile subconsciously drew one to your lips.

“You think too much, lovely.” She sighed, fingers drawing back to gently rub against your stomach.

“You give me too much to think about.”

She huffed a breath out her nose, shrugging in halfhearted agreement. She shuffled against you, rolling so she lay between your legs. The glass of wine was taken from your grasp and placed on the side table.

Sheets were peeled back, leaving you exposed to Margot. The air of the room pricked against your skin, raising bumps against it. She was quick to sate the chills, moving down the bed till she was eye-line with the meeting of your thighs.

Long fingers came to grasp your thighs, pushing your legs up till they bent at the knee. She kissed along the sensitive skin of your inner thighs, leaving your thighs shaking just enough for a trained eye to notice.

“You smell like honey, honey.” Margot giggled, eyes meeting yours for a moment before dropping back to your heat.

She drew in a deep breath before pressing a kiss to your clit, listening for your reaction. You let out a long held breath, relaxing back into the pillows, sinking further into the mattress.

Your fingers lifted to her hair, curling into it and massaging gently in appreciation. She hummed as she licked gently, collecting your wetness and moving it to your clit. You rolled your hips up to the meet the movements, chasing the feeling of her mouth on you.

Her hands moved off your thighs, sliding up to your chest to tweak at your nipples as she worked. This was her in every sense of the word, ensuring there was no aspect of you that she hadn’t covered. You had to be wholly hers.

How much of her was yours?

“Stop thinking and start pulling my hair.” She spoke against you, the vibrations of her words making your knees falter.

You took a good grip and tugged her closer, forcing her tongue further into your core. You let out a satisfied moan, her ministrations speeding up the more force you gave her.

You couldn’t help but slide down the sheets, bringing your wetness to her mouth, hand delivered for her taking. You were more than willing to give her whatever she could want, whatever she could take. 

She was spurred on by the growl that omitted from your chest as she nipped at you, ever so gently. It made her fingers grip just that bit harder, her tongue just a little bit more deft.

That was just how it worked, you both fed off of each other. From the moment you both met, it became obvious that your existence had become a reaction to the other one’s being.

 The air on your cunt drew you out of your thoughts, that and Margot coming up on her knees and crawling towards you. Her hands came to your face, gently moving her fingers against your skin.

She kept your gaze for a moment, holding you steady in her grasp. You felt a sudden crack against your cheek, her open palm colliding with you and reddening the skin in its wake.

Her other hand closed around your chin, pulling you in closer until you could feel her breath fanning over you.

“Will you get out of your own head and fuck me already?”

You were the quick draw this round, launching forward and having her back against the mattress in a matter of seconds. The salacious grin that painted across her face had your mind on one thing only.

You drew your knee up, pressing against her pussy, feeling her already wet against you. Her mouth fell open with a cheeky giggle, finally getting exactly what she wanted out of you. Attention.

“That’s more like it, was that all I had to do, get a little rough with you?” Her words were clipped by breathy moans.

“When will you learn to keep this mouth shut?” You nipped gently at her lower lip, whispering into her mouth.

You drew back your knee to be soon replaced by two of your fingers plunging into her core, earning you a reward, a generous moan erupting from Margot’s chest.

“If this is what I get, I don’t think I ever will.”

-

In your perfect world, you’d have Margot everyday of the week. Your sheets would stay warm with the heat of her body every minute of the day, just waiting till she slipped back into them.

In reality, that’s just not how things could ever be, not as long as you lived like this. You could go days, the longest being a whole week, without having her grace your home.

For those times, you’d steal touches in the cover of your trailer. Your hunger would be sated by lifting her onto the makeup counter, slotting in between her thighs. Burning hot stolen kisses when a spare moment could be found.

Those periods of time where you couldn’t have each other alone at night, Margot was near wild by the time you got to her. She’d spend the days teasing, riling you up, doing her best to get a rise out of you. She missed it just as much as you did.

Constant craving, in it’s truest form. Neither of you would ever truly get exactly what you wanted, not with all you had at stake. Gambling with a losing hand, that’s what this truly was at the root of it.

Having her in secret always came with the territory, and there was an undeniable thrill to it all. She breezed into your trailer easy enough, the sound of the door closing sent you into motion. Your hands had learnt over time the quickest way to rid her of clothes.

There was nothing that displayed your primal instincts for her than when you were fully clothed and she was as naked as the day she was born. She never minded, if you asked her it actually made her wetter than before. That and the way your hands guided her to the seat under the window.

The window that looked out to an empty field, completely barren for miles, where nobody went. You hiked her knees up onto the bench seat, running your fingers from her knees up onto her hips. Your chin rested on her shoulder, whispering your desires into the air.

“You want me in this hot little cunt?” The filth of your words a stark contrast to the purity of her beauty.

She groaned in response, pressing her bare ass back against your crotch, answering your question for you. You slid your hands forward, holding them flush against her tight stomach.

You slid them down towards her pussy, rubbing over her mound and towards her slit. You dragged two fingers along her, collecting her wetness and spreading it to her clit. You soaked your fingers in her sweetness, reveling in her cries.

So responsive to any touch you could spare, any bit of attention you could give her. She rolled her heat into your hand, daring you to slip your fingers up and within her.

You never were strong enough to say no to her.

So you had her wrapped around your fingers in a moment, muscles clenching tights around them and willing you to pump them harder and faster. You slipped your free arm tight around her waist and pulled her into you.

The soaking wet sounds you elicited from her had your thighs clenched together, the pulsing between your legs a direct result of the way she felt under you. Her own hands tweaked at her nipples.

“I’ve never been touched like the way you do.”

You desperately wanted to ask “so how does he touch you, then?” but you knew better than that. You knew you didn’t want to even think of him touching her. But it should would be nice to solidify that you did it better. 

The way she rode your hand, flexing her hips against him, eager to make her way to orgasm, that told you in no uncertain terms. Everything she did drew you in closer and made you want to explore more of her.

In the quiet of your trailer, where only the two of you knew, she came with a shout of your name and a strong grip on your wrist. Once again, you’d been enough for her. More than enough for her.

-

Days on location were even harder, less hidden space for you both to slip into. You weren’t in control of your surroundings, you couldn’t know where someone might come from. God forbid you got caught, the fine line you both walked each day.

This time you were mid-city, streets blocked off so you could do this scene in a car. A ‘67 Chevy Nova with the top down, the heat of the afternoon sun beating down on the both of you. You drummed your fingers against the steering wheel, watching Margot fidget in your peripheral.

Pushing your sunglasses up your nose, you watched the crew rush around you as you did all you had to do, sit still and look pretty. You sunk down in the leather seat, Margot’s constant movement agitating you.

You reached your breaking point as she huffed for the eighth time in a minute. Your hand shot out, gripping her thigh and anchoring her to the seat. The corner of your eye caught the small smile that found its way to her face. 

“Are you finished, miss?” You sighed, knowing she’d gotten exactly what she wanted.

“Eh, I’m sure I’ll find something else.” Tilting her head towards you, you saw the smile spread across her features.

Your natural reaction was to match her expression, something you’d never been able to control. She’d won again, just collecting winning after winning when it came to you.

The feeling of Margot’s fingers against the skin of your hand drew your attention to her lap. You loosened the grip on her thigh as you felt her starting to move your hand at her discretion.

As soon as you felt her moving it upwards, your heart nearly beat out your chest. The soft cotton of her skirt was drifting over your hand as she placed it on her upper thigh. You darted your eyes around, checking to see if anyone was paying attention.

Tapping two of your fingers against her thigh, heat rose within you as you felt her spread her legs for you. Her complacency, when she wasn’t testing you, could have you soaked in seconds. You moved in, gently wrapping your fingers under her heat.

You were expecting to feel resistance from a pair of cotton underwear, but were instead met directly with her slit, which was already wetting your fingers. You snapped your head in her direction, watching the way her eyes rolled back in her head as you dipped your fingers in.

“You’re such a naughty little slut, aren’t you?” You spoke nonchalantly, so not to draw attention to yourselves.

“Got to get your attention some how, right?” Her words were clipped with whimpers as you played with her.

“I give you plenty attention, it’s just impossible to keep you satisfied.”

If anyone was to watch, you’d just think it was a conversation between two friends. You’d both become awful good at keeping it cool, however, just under the surface you did have the tips of your fingers sinking into her tight heat.

“Well, you’re doing a pretty good job of it now.”

“So all I have to do is keep my fingers buried in you at all times? Easy done.”

You cut off her next bite by curling your fingers up, pulling forward and watching her mouth drop open. You pumped them steadily, listening for those tiny cries that she was trying so hard to to keep down.

“Quit being so naughty and touch your clit for me.”

She was quick to follow instruction, bringing her hand under her skirt to rub furious little circles. You felt her hips roll forward into your hand, bucking up with every pump. 

You felt her restricting around you, quickly finding her way towards her peak. She bit her lip, gripping down on your wrist and digging her nails in tight. Her pussy felt like a vice around you, soaking your fingers and the top of your hand.

“You going to be good?”

She let you have your hand back, drawing it out from under the skirt and raising it to her mouth. She wrapped her lips around the fingers that had just been inside her, cleaning them off with her eyes on yours, doing nothing for that heat between your legs.

“So good that I’ll even ride you tonight, my tits in your face, just how you like.” Her voice never breaking, like she was reading her grocery list.

The moan you choked back hurt like hell, shuffling against the sticky seats. It’d gotten hotter in those past moments and you were beginning to stick. You settled with a nod, willing the hours to pass you by and get you the fuck home.

-

You were home soon enough, maybe because you packed in as soon as you’d heard Margot’s offer. Admittedly, you were probably a shit to work with that day, wanting nothing more than to get behind the door of your bedroom. It had you on edge, cutting everything short in hopes it’d get you home quicker.

As soon as you crossed over the threshold into the promised land, you were sure to take her up on that promise. You walked backwards until your knees hit the bed, pulling her forward with you as you went.

Her front hit yours, the weight of her dropping against you. As you released your breath, you felt her sink into you, molding into the shape of your body. Her weight on top of you, the feeling of her against your body, this was how it was always meant to be.

She pushed up against you, moving you back up the bed until she could sit up. Her fingers were quick on the buttons of your shirt, yours just the same. The clothes flew off the bed, a tangle of moving to kick them away. Your base desire to have her bare skin against you, making itself known.

Margot situated herself back on your hips, rolling her own into you. The feeling of her skin against yours, in the most sensitive areas had your eyes rolling back in your head. Your fingers gripped onto her hips, pulling her in harder to you.

“Sit back against the pillows, I’ll go grab it.” She whispered, leaning forward and pressing her lips to yours for a moment.

You complied, shuffling back and sitting up so you could have her in your lap. She returned with your strap, passing it forward for you to put on. She sat in between your legs, looking up the length of your body with something in her eyes that you couldn’t quite place.

It was there every time you were alone, something like hunger, but something like she was ready to risk everything to have you in her hands. She bent down, grasping her hands around the length of your strap, wrapping her lips around the tip.

Brushing your fingers through her hair, you pulled it round to the side, grasping it into a bunch in your hands. You guided her as she sunk her mouth down around it, the sounds driving straight to the heat in your stomach.

Her eyes drifted up to yours, locking in your sights as she took it right down her throat. You couldn’t help but let out a groan, the sight of her between your legs and taking you so nicely, what did you do in another life to get this lucky?

You brought your hands down the length of her neck, feeling her shiver under the feather-light touches. You drew them against her shoulder blades, coming to her underarms to lift her towards you.

“You look awful pretty with my cock in your mouth but I heard I was getting tits in my face?”

She giggled, sitting in your lap, still softly stroking the silicone in front of her. She lent into you, hovering her lips just moments from yours.

“And you say I’m the one who can never get enough.”

“Watch your mouth.”

“Watch how I move.”

And with that, she was lowering herself onto the strap, her fingers spreading her pussy apart so you could see where you sunk into her. The gasps and whimpers that fell from you were entirely unintentional, but well received by Margot.

She rocked forward, the end that was snug inside you shifted and forced your eyes to roll back. Margot let out a stuttered groan, bracing her hands on the headboard above you.

True to her word, she lent forward until your face rest between her breasts. Your hands came up to take one in each, rolling the soft skin in your palms before you tweaked at her nipples. She cast her head back, rolling her hips against you as a soft call of your name spread around the room. 

She pulled herself up to only sink back down, taking your strap right to the hilt. You tilted your head to take her nipple in your mouth, the sweet scent of her skin enveloping you entirely. With her against you like this, all your could see was the expanse of her skin.

Just like that she’d done what she was so good at, made sure that she was the only thing that existed for you.

Margot tired of the slow and sensual and within an instant she was bouncing in your lap and leaving you breathless. She drew her chest back from you, allowing your hands to slide up her sides as you watched in awe.

She brought her own arms up, tousling her hair and stretching her hands towards to ceiling. She looked as if she was celebrating, her girlish giggles screamed innocence whilst her actions painted her as awfully naughty.

You could only look on in amazement, this girl that seemed to hold the world in the palm of her hand, but chose to hold onto you instead. Your arms wrapped around her waist and you forced yourself out of bed.

Pressing her back to the mattress, legs flung over your shoulders as you made the split decision to rail her. There was no such thing as restraint when you were dealing with a girl like her. There was no time to keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself.

The way that she moved, she spoke, it all set your soul alight and had you aching to release the carnal desires that swirled inside of you. Margot had no qualms, a scream omitting from her as your angle hit it just right.

“Oh god, just like that baby.” She squealed, hands reaching around to squeeze your ass.

All your power and energy went into pounding her through that mattress. An awful lot like how every part of you went into her, God created you to keep Margot interested.

You lowered your head, eyes holding tight with her own gaze. Those big eyes blinked up at you, tears pricking the corners from the pleasure coursing through her. 

Your lips connected with hers, anything to stop you from saying what your instincts were trying to force out of you. Her hands moved up to your head, holding you mouth against hers as her tongue slipped inside.

Passion like this is not coincidental, it is never a mistake that a fever like this breaks the moment you lay eyes on each other. What you are doing might not be right, but you cannot say that it is a mistake.

-

The day they told you that there was another shoot on location, you had to stop your eyes from rolling. But when they told you it was out of town, you felt Margot’s eyes practically burning a hole into the side of your head.

You knew what it meant, a different city, a hotel room with hallways that could be crept through without anyone knowing.

And that it certainly was.

You were only away for a week, but that week saw a knock at your hotel door every night. This evening, there was no exception.

You opened it to Margot, beautiful as always with a grin, but there was something different. This grin had secrets behind it, secrets different than usual.

She was also wearing a coat indoors, one hand rested on the tie that kept it shut. She stepped through the door of your room and closed the door behind her.

You were forced to step backwards and let her into the room, not that you were complaining. She held onto the end of the tie, tugging gently as it came away. She took on side of the coat into each of her hands.

She pulled the open and presented herself to you, bare naked aside from the heels that adorned her feet. Your tongue came out to swipe along your bottom lip. There she was, always finding something else to drive you fucking crazy.

“You walked through the halls of this hotel with nothing on underneath that?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Where anybody could’ve caught you?”

“Not worried somebody could see your treat, are you?”

“Get your hands against the window, I’ll be back.”

And for once in your life, Margot had listened to you without an argument. Maybe it was the tone in your voice? The “don’t fucking question me, right now” kind of tone.

You stepped back into the main part of the room and there she was, hands pressed to the window that overlooked the city. You came up behind her, bending slightly to trail your hand from her ankle, up her leg until it came to rest on her hip.

You brushed her hair to the side, nestling in her neck and kissing it just gently. You pressed into her behind, letting her feel the silicon of your strap that was now resting between the cheeks of her ass.

Your foot came out and kicked her legs open just that bit further. Wrapping your palm around the strap, your drew it against the wetness of her slit.

“W-what if somebody looked in and saw?” You’d never heard her so hesitant before.

“Oh, so now you care about somebody seeing whats mine?”

“Yours, your right, it is yours.” Her moan was intoxicating, her head falling forward to rest against the glass.

With one dip, you sunk the strap all the way into her. It knocked the breath out of her, making her shoot one hand back to grip your own hip.

You took it in your hand, bringing it back to the window but keeping your grasp around it. You pulled her hips back slightly so we was almost bent over.

Rocking your hips forward, you created a rhythm that had desperate cries tumbling from her lips. You gripped her tighter, with every thrust you pulled her pussy back against you.

Your gaze lifted up to the city in front of you, buildings across from your own. Anybody could be looking in and watching the way you blew her back right out. You never let slip that it only spurred you on.

For so long you’ve wanted to tell someone, anyone, that this is exactly what your nights looked like. That those moans and cries were courtesy of the way you fucked her nicely.

You made her legs shake and her toes curl, you were able to make her gush around your strap. You wrapped your fingers in her hair and pulled her back up against your front.

Your fingers moved down to wrap around her throat. Her own hands quickly clasped around your wrist and held you there, willing you to squeeze harder.

“Nobody on this earth will ever fuck me as good as you do.” She gasped, throwing her hips back against your own.

“Tell me more.”

“Before this started, I would touch myself and think about how good you’ll feel on me.”

“More, give me more.”

“You want the truth?”

The spin of the world slowed down, everything shut down and the sound of your own blood pulsing in your ears was all you could hear. Your hand around her throat locked tighter, your hand on her hip moved to her clit, your lips rested so close to her ear.

“Tell me the truth.”

Her head turned to the side, her hips rolled back against you, just like that she was right back in control of everything and anything that happened between the two of you.

Her lips pursed and that wicked tongue darted out before speaking in a whisper so low, you felt it resonate within you.

“I think about you when I fuck my husband.”

You spun her round so quickly, hand on her back and bending her over the arm of the couch. The scream that ripped from her was feral as you plowed straight into her with a relentless pace.

Your world was spinning again, but as usual, it was orbiting right around the girl under your fingertips.

-

The day Margot came into work and just seemed, tired? Her opting to rest her head in your lap, let you play with her hair as she dozed. She didn’t look ill, if anything her skin was more radiant than usual.

Her hair was softer, and she just seemed to be brighter. But she was tired, and seemed to long for a softer touch. It didn’t mean she was any less all-over-you, whilst her energy was down, that seemed to have increased tenfold.

“Baaaaby.” She called out, stepping into your trailer with her shoulders dropped.

You looked up from your notes and gave her a kind smile, ushering her over with outstretched hands. She fell into your lap, her back pressed up against you and head tipped back on your shoulder.

“What’s got you down, buttercup?” You asked, wrapping your arms snug around her waist.

She groaned, unfolding your hands and slipping them up the sweater she was wearing. She’d rid herself of her bra and left your hands resting on her breasts. She wiggled against you, spurring you on to start massaging her gently.

“My tits are so sore, and I’m just so fucking tired.” She complained, melting into your touch.

“Well lucky all I am is a pair of hands.” You jested, rolling the tender skin in your palms.

The gentle sounds that fell from her were bliss, that paired with the fact she was quietly grinding herself into her hand whilst you worked. You hummed, pressing kisses along her jaw and let her enjoy herself.

It made a hell of a lot more sense those couple weeks later. 

The day she ripped into your trailer like a hurricane and proudly lifted her shirt in front of you. You stepped back in shock, the shock of being greeted by her entirely bare front.

“Good morning to you too, honey.” You couldn’t help but laugh, and admire the sight this early in the day.

“What do you see?” She asked, the glee imminent in her voice.

“I see your body, baby.”

“Well you’re not wrong about the last part!”

“The last- wait, what?”

She pulled her shirt back down, a bright grin stretched across her face. Your eyes narrowed, brows shot up to your hairline. Suddenly the smile transferred to you, your body sending you across the room to pick her up in a spin.

“Margot! Congratulations, this is incredible!” You cooed, you took your hands from her waist as you placed her down and brought them to her cheeks.

It was her that pulled you in for the kiss, the clashing teeth and tongues kind of kiss. The ‘please don’t let this end’ kind of kiss. The kind you’ve become all too familiar with.

It was also her that drew back from you first, laying her head against your collarbone and humming gently in time with your heartbeat. You ran your hands down her back, holding her close against you and enjoying the happiness.

“You’ll still like me when I’m round?”

“Something tells me I’ll even find it sexy.”

And like most things, you were right.

-

The sun cast through the window of your bedroom and drifted over Margot’s form as she lay back against the plush pillows. The sun glimmered against her like it rose just for her. You couldn’t tell if you were witness to a “pregnancy glow” or if that was just something that was always within her.

Your eyes ran from her toes, up her long legs, across the swell of her belly, her breasts, and up to that smiling face. Her eyes looked hazy, blinking gently as she enjoyed the way you stared. Her fingers rose to beckon you close, the invisible string she kept on you drew you in.

Your fingers traced up the soft skin of her leg, nails grazing just enough to bring goosebumps to the surface. You continued up across the skin of her stomach, moving gently across her breasts and stopping to cup her face.

Margot sighed into your touch, leaning up to bring her lips to yours. The kisses weren’t hungry and feverish, there was time for these ones, an unlimited time for you to savor her taste. She took your hand from her face, lowering it to rest between her legs.

She pressed your hand against the apex of her thighs, allowing you to feel the dampness that you caused. You chuckled into her mouth, your tongue moving in further and eliciting a moan from her at the feeling.

“You want to come for the 4th time today? It’s only 9am.” You mumbled, ever so slightly rubbing your fingers against her clit.

“It’s not me, it’s the hormones.” She retorted, pulling your face closer to her.

“As if you weren’t this insatiable before hand.”

“Please, honey, I need it.” The pull in her voice had you clenching around nothing.

“Keep talking.”

You drew back from her lips, as much as you could’ve come just from the way she moved her tongue against your own. You positioned yourself against her side, fingers still slow between her legs.

“All night, all I could think about was riding your fingers whilst you sucked on my nipples.” Her breathy moans hit you right in the gut. “My tits are so sore, I need you.”

There was no more persuasion needed, if Margot said she needed you, she got you.

You sunk two of your fingers into her, immediately curling them up and eliciting a filthy cry from her. Your thighs clamped together, grinding down as she huffed out moans of your name.

Lowering your head, you closed your lips around her nipple, sucking gently against it. You felt her clamp around your fingers, hips rolling forward to sink deeper onto them.

Your tongue swirled around the hard bud, teeth gently grazing around it. Margot wrapped her hand around your wrist, pulling your hand in closer. At that point, she was essentially using you for her own pleasure, and you couldn’t have been more willing.

Deep down, you hand no issues with her using your body to get herself off, and there had been the occasional time where she had. She tugged at your wrist, thrusting her hips as she did, fucking your fingers. You added another finger, a cry omitting from her as you stretched her out.

Her response to your motions had you sucking her skin just a bit harder, you were put on this earth to draw those cries from her lips. You were here to make her wet, to make her come, to have her writhing under your hands.

She was so wet, you could feel it against your hand, you moved your thumb up against her clit. Her head shot back and the way she shouted your name had a whimper dropping from your lips.

You furiously rubbed at her clit, fingers curling up with the motions and making her hips stutter against your hand. She wrapped her hands around your hair, stroking your scalp as you switched to her other nipple.

Her breathing was unsteady, clipped words from her brain trying to process what to say. She resorted to just calling your name, focusing on chasing the orgasm that was threatening to erupt at any moment.

You gently bit down on her nipple, curling your fingers up at that moment, and all hell broke loose. Her hands moved to your shoulders, nails sinking into the skin as she gripped you tight to her.

Her hips lifted from the bed, a near scream drifting across your bedroom. She rode your hand through the hot flashes of pleasure that took over her all at once. You felt your hand become soaked, the wetness cascading across your fingers and palm.

She came down slowly, her thighs shaking and breathing still choppy. You drew your fingers out, slowly rubbing her clit as she came back to earth. Her breasts still glistened with the traces of your mouth, but your lips were now pressed to her cheek.

You cooed to her gently, just how pretty she looked, how sexy she was with a round belly. She relaxed into your arms, breathing slowing down as her legs started to un-tense.

“You want to know something else I’ve been unable to get off my mind?”

“Enlighten me.”

“How about you come sit on my face and I’ll show you.”

-

You sat on the balcony of the hotel, the afternoon sun hot against your skin, Margot laying between your legs. The view overlooking the park below you, both so high up that nobody could look in.

Your robe barely covered you and she opted for her usual, nothing. 

The warm air drifted over you, the silence welcomed you in and kept you safe. Safe from saying what your heart wouldn’t let you get out.

“What a ride this has been.” Her sweet voice drifted from below you.

Your mind cast back to that morning, your last interview for the press tour of this film. It was done and dusted, this was done and dusted.

Your flights left early the next morning, you were to return to your homes, your live reset back to normal.

But what was normal now that you knew the shape her mouth made as she called your name? Now you knew the way her legs shook as your fingers rested between them?

There was no denying that she’d done what you always knew she would, walk straight into your life and turn it upside down, before walking right back out again with a breathy laugh over her shoulder.

You knew if she looked up, she’d scold you for thinking too much. Your mind always seeming to be somewhere else. Somewhere with her.

Shutting down every thought that chipped away at you, reminded you that everything would soon come to an end. You shut that away, there was only one thing you could be certain of, any way.

Your universe started and ended with Margot.

That was for sure.

[costellos]

author’s note: this wasn’t a request, just something super self-indulgent that I wanted to do! ❤⃛(*ૂ❛ัᴗ❛ั*ૂ) also this ended up taking 2.5 hours to write aldkf;j so much for unwinding at the end of the day. overall, I’m super proud of how this came out — please enjoy!

❥ ┋ ❝ bucci gang realizing that they’re in love!

bruno bucciarati.

Bucciarati realizes he’s in love when he sees you defending civilians.

he is a man made of love. for his people, for his community, for his goals — he firmly believes that everyone and everything can be built on yes, but more importantly, taken care of.

he sees you protecting an elderly couple during a stand battle. in a split second do you throw your stand at the couple, taking a hefty amount of damage in their place. you’re bloody and your arm is definitely broken, but you still turn to them. "you need to leave. now,” you say. although your words are harsh and hoarse, your smile reminds them that yes, everything will be fine, I just need you to trust me.

you didn’t have to protect them. any other gangster would have left them to die. they’re old, no one would miss them.

but you did. you put these two strangers, two no ones at the wrong place at the wrong time, before yourself. even if it meant you’d die.

Bucciarati would visit you shortly after the battle. Giorno had already tended to your wounds, evident by your lack of bandages. his hair is normally neatly placed, but it looks like he had been rustling it, with his clips out of place and the braid atop his head uneven. his concern is apparent; he’s wracked his brain waiting for your recovery. you knew that Bucciarati cared about his team, but when did he care this much? ↳ “I admit, your actions were certainly reckless,” he would say to you, taking a seat beside your bed. “you’re lucky that fight didn’t end worse than it did. nonetheless...” his voice is tired yet soft, comforting. “I’m glad you’re okay. I’m... I’m incredibly glad.”

leone abbacchio.

Abbacchio realizes he’s in love when he sees you upholding true justice.

although he would never admit it, he is haunted by his inability to save his partner during his time as an officer. as such, Abbacchio envies those who back justice in spite of the system Italy lives under.

you’re patrolling one of La Passione’s turfs with him when you see it: two officers harassing a young girl. even though Abbacchio tells you not to get involved, you quickly storm over to the scene. their voices are loud and clear, despite them being several meters away. the girl looks scared.

it turns out she had stolen a handful of painkillers from the corner store. the cops noticed her scurrying out as they were buying a pack of smokes. and now, they were threatening to take her into the station. “I need them for my family!” she explains, but the cops don’t buy it. they huff something about her bringing them to school and selling them to her friends.

“here. I’ll pay for her. just leave her alone.” Abbacchio watches as you flash 30 euros to the cops, more than enough to pay for the medicine. playing them at their own game, he sees. thankfully, they relent, pocketing the money and leaving the scene. and after you talk to the girl, explaining that if she needs more help to come find you, you both leave the scene too.

it’s a brief affair. truthfully, he wouldn’t have gotten himself involved. he wishes you hadn’t either. it would’ve been less of a headache, and now that girl is going to pester you again in the future. but he can’t stop replaying the scene in this head. how you willingly stood up for her, reassured her that everything would be okay. how you smiled and looked so content after the fact. ↳ “ I envy you,” he would say as you walked away from the scene. “doing the right thing is...” he pauses. stupid? naive? “...it’s not easy. you didn’t have to do anything but I admire your valor. just don’t be surprised if that girl comes up at your doorstep begging for more money.” nonetheless, he wants to learn more from you. to be good again, he thinks. maybe then he can be someone that he himself is proud of. and maybe, eventually, he’ll make you proud too.

giorno giovanna.

Giorno realizes he’s in love when he sees your ambition.

he prides himself on his resolve. to him, resolve is committing to something regardless of the difficulties that a person faces. seeing you be so goal-oriented would make him believe that he’s found his match.

it doesn’t have to be a huge goal, like dedicating yourself to a field of practice or learning a new language. it can be as simple as trying to keep your houseplants alive. in fact, those little things come off as more charming to him. it shows that you’re passionate about everything you do, no matter what it is.

seeing you continuously try despite numerous failures would make Giorno’s heart pound. you refuse to give up. even with everything against you, you still roll up your sleeves, take a deep breath, and pick yourself up again. he adores this about you.

he realizes it when you’re rambling about your next move in your goals. your face is so excited, your eyes so wide and bright. your mouth is voicing your steps a million words a minute but all he can focus on is how beautiful you look. the smile on his lips is unmistakable. ↳ “tell me more. I want to know everything. tell me about every detail, every step, what you’ll do when you’re finished... all of it.” he won’t say it — after all, he doesn’t want to come off as too desperate — but he wants to be there every step of the way with you. and when you’ve completed your goal, he wants to be the one next to you, the one to say, “I am so, so proud of you.”

guido mista.

Mista realizes he’s in love when you laugh at one of his jokes.

life should be simple. that’s the mantra he lives by. despite being a gangster, he just wants to have a simple life filled with simple pleasures. one of those ways is through telling stories.

it happens when the group is eating dinner at a local restaurant. Mista is telling some long-winded anecdote, something about how he heroically beat up a landlord for harassing his tenants over money. at the end, it turned out to be the set up for a really brief and really stupid punchline.

everyone is looking at him. “ah? ahhhh?” he muses, but no one responds. the silence in the air is unbearable. hm. wow. is it hot in here or what? finally, Narancia breaks the silence, muttering that he doesn’t get it. Fugo tells him that Mista could have made the joke so much shorter. Bucciarti exhales quickly from his nostrils, a half-assed attempt at laughing. Giorno and Abbacchio don’t say anything.

but then you. oh, you. it takes you a moment to get it, but when you do, your giggling disrupts the awkwardness. it sounds like bells, Mista thinks. sweet bells, ringing like how they used to at the church every Sunday morning in his hometown. it makes him feel warm, welcome, and he can’t help but feel his face flush when he hears your laughing.

Mista stays in place afterwards, pushing his white beans to and fro on his plate. he’s not hungry anymore. he keeps looking up at you, and while he had acknowledged you were attractive before, something about you was now beautiful. you were happy here, with your eyes bright and your smile wide. eventually, he would say: ↳ “hey, thanks for covering me back there. those guys never laugh at anything I say.” he rolls his eyes playfully, adding a slight shrug of his shoulders. “lemme make it up to you. what can I do for you?” he’s trying to be smooth, but he’s so giddy at the prospect at spending more time with you!

narancia ghirga.

Narancia realizes he’s in love when you don’t lose your patience with him.

he doesn’t have much of a formal education. hence, critical thinking skills don’t come easy to him. he tries his best, he really does, but it’s difficult when he’s hardly flexed his brain.

he’s writing a song. nothing fancy, but music has always been a part of Narancia’s life that he wants to give it a go himself. maybe one day he’ll be a famous hip hop artist, touring across Europe and maybe even the U.S. one day! the thought makes him excited. but for now, he needs to establish the lyrics.

rap is easier said than done, though. Fugo is teasing him about his inability to write poetry — what makes Narancia think that he could write a whole song? he grits his teeth and turns back to his paper. 

that’s when you approach him. you sit down with him, asking him what he would like to write about. “oh, uh... growing up in the streets, I guess,” he mumbles. he’s taken aback by your help. plus, talking about it now makes him embarrassed. but you don’t judge him, no; you sit down with him and try to help him nail down the theme. and once you have that, you assist him in finding snappy lyrics and catchy rhymes. 

you don’t criticize him for his ideas. you don’t yell at him for his suggestions. you just listen and add on. the encounter is foreign, to say the least... but not unwelcome. Narancia finds your help incredibly productive (much better than Fugo could ever offer him). and the time goes by so fast! within a few hours, his song is done. yet he’s not happy... no, he starts to feel lonely the moment you stand up, off to assist Bucciarati with whatever he needs. ↳ “wait, hold on, [Name]!” shit. his voice is way too desperate. he softens it as best he can muster: “can... can we write another song sometime? I have a lot more ideas and I can’t do it without you.” fuck. he did it again. but when smile at him and nod, promising that you’ll help him hit the Top 40, Narancia can’t help but smile back.  

panacotta fugo.

Fugo realizes that he’s in love when you put him before yourself.

genius. prodigy. failure. Fugo is defined by how others see him. after his parents abandoned him for leaving an abusive establishment, he finds himself lost in the world. who is he? what is he worth?

he’s escorting you to your mission when his car is attacked by a rival gang. the assault is a blur. he can remember the car flipping over, tumbling off the road and into the Mediterranean Sea. it happens so fast. the salty water surrounding you both. the windshield cracking. the airbag goes off, suffocating him. he can’t see. he can’t breathe. and suddenly, it’s dark.

when he wakes up, he realizes that you’re both on the beach. “where are we?” he musters out. it hurts to talk. you hush him to take it easy, that he had most certainly broken a few ribs. and that’s when he sees it: when he looks down, his wounds are tended to. gashes have been tenderly wrapped in gauze and minor cuts treated with balm. a pain relief patch has been placed on his chest, no doubt where the air bag hit him. but when he looks at you, you’re bleeding through your bandages.

that’s right. there was a first aid kit in the car. based on his injuries, you spent the majority of supplies on him, even though you definitely had it just as bad. “why?” is all he can say.

why? you shake your head. “because you’re my friend,” you answer, adjusting the gauze on his wrist. “I’m taking care of you because you’re worth it.”

your words catch him by surprise. he doesn’t believe it, but... your face is honest enough. his thoughts are jumbled, as mixed as the sand and water at the shore just a few meters away. and when your hand touches his wrist... he shakes his own head.

↳ “you should’ve tended to yourself first.” his tongue tastes of nothing but blood and salt and his words show it. a beat, and gentler this time: “I appreciate your thinking of me. thank you.” that’s all he can say, at least for now. it hurts to much to talk, moreover think. so he places his hand over yours as a gesture of thanks. friends, huh? the idea before sounded laughable, but now... there was something warm about it. the answer to his question — who is he? — had come as quickly as the waves beneath him: a friend.

[minchanslut]

Day 4 - Anonymous Sex // S.C.B

Pairing: Seo Changbin x F!Reader Warnings: Anonymous sex, oral (male receiving), fem masturbation Word count: 1494

Changbin sighed deeply, running his hands through his hair as he leaned against a wall at the back of the club, away from everyone. His blood was boiling at his opponent receiving more praise from the crowd than him. It was he who deserved to stand in front of the cheering audience, being named winner of the freestyle rap battle. He found that it was his rightful title, and that it was being taken right from under his nose once again. “I’m so much better than him.” he thought. And while that might be true, he was not nearly as popular as his competitor, who already had years of experience as an underground rapper, which meant that the public was less likely to deem him the winner. Changbin, unable to sit there and witness the fellow contender bask in his victory, stood up and made his way to the restroom. Once inside he leaned against the door, letting out a deep breath. He felt relieved, finally being able to hear his own thoughts which were no longer being overpowered by loud music and the boasting of the winning contestant. Changbin entered a vacant stall, hoping to calm his nerves and pass the time, praying that by the time he got out, the celebration would have died down, and that he could leave the building without anyone needing to remind him of his defeat. However, when he sat down on the closed toilet seat, an oddly placed hole that formed a bridge between his stall and the one to his right caught his attention. He tried peeking inside, but stopped halfway through as he began to second guess himself. Instead he slowly raised his hand, knocking his fingers lightly against the wooden divider. 

“Hello? Is anyone there?” 

His voice caught you off guard, causing you to jump slightly. You had been in there for what felt like hours. But people barely entered the stall which was placed beside yours, and when they did, they’d leave without as much as questioning the highly suspicious hole. Not wanting whoever was on the other side to believe there really was no one there, you decided to reply before he chose to leave. 

“Would you be upset if there wasn’t?”

Changbin was shocked to hear the voice of a woman in the men’s bathroom to say the least. He adjusted his composure and spoke once more. 

“What are you doing in here?”

He heard a quiet scoff, followed by “There’s a moderately sized hole between this wooden wall, and a woman sitting at the opposite side of it, take a guess.” 

For each answer received, Changbin seemed to only have more questions. 

“Aren’t you afraid of getting caught? I mean, this doesn’t seem very subtle.” he said, gesturing at the hole, and though you couldn’t see him, you knew what he was referring to. You shrugged to yourself, saying “It’s straightforward. I like it.”

Changbin was skeptical. He wasn’t sure if this situation could be trusted, but at the same time he thought this could be a good way to relieve some of the stress he had built up. 

Changbin stood up awkwardly, digging into the pockets of his jeans in search of any loose change. He fished a crumpled up $5 from his pocket and, after straightening it out best as he could, he slowly passed the bill through the gap in the wall, fake coughing in his hand to get your attention. He scratched the back of his head, claiming that he wasn’t sure if that’d be enough. You reluctantly accepted the money, figuring it would be easier than having to explain to him that you weren’t doing this in search of money, but in search of pleasure. 

After noticing how much more amazing your sex life was when you slept with people you had only recently met in comparison to long term parters, you decided to take it a step further. 

“Only one time.” you told yourself. You didn’t want to place yourself in any difficult situations by having sex with someone whose name you didn’t even know. Yet at the same time, the idea of being fucked by someone who knew nothing about you, other than knowing they found your touch intoxicating, was so arousing to you. You had almost lost hope of people still being familiar with the concepts of glory holes, so you were beyond excited when you heard the sound of Changbin undoing his belt. He glanced over to the stall door, making sure it was locked, before sliding his partially erect member through the hole. On the other side, you were met with the tip of his cock, a rosy tinge covering the sensitive skin. You licked the head of his dick a few times teasingly, only using the tip of your tongue. Then, using the same technique, you licked a stripe up the bottom part of his hardening shaft, then once more, this time your tongue flat against the skin. Swirling your tongue around the tip, you began collecting his precum, the saliva which dripped from your mouth providing lubrication as you stroked his cock. Changbin’s legs began to shake as he fought the urge to thrust into your mouth. You started pumping him faster, but your lips still only wrapped around the tip. You noticed his sputtering movements and his need to have you suck him off. You smirked, releasing his dick from your mouth with a slight pop, before beginning you place open mouthed kissed up the sides of his penis, your tongue occasionally poking out to lick one of the prominent veins. 

Changbin had his head thrown back, hands against the walls, knuckles turning white from clenching his fists out of frustration. You were being a major tease, yet he couldn’t do anything about it. He wanted nothing more than to fuck your face, making you take him at a pace that was more suitable for him. 

“Ugh, fuck, please just put it in your mouth.”

You could feel your walls clench at his words. His voice seemingly making you a bit more docile, as you complied, finally putting his cock in your mouth, taking in more than just the tip. You started bobbing your head, using the saliva that dripped down his cock to stroke anything you couldn’t take into your mouth. As Changbin’s moans grew louder, you felt more of your wetness pool between your legs. With your free hand you began rubbing your clit through your panties. Adding additional pressure whenever you felt Changbin’s dick at the back of your throat. Pushing the fabric of your underwear aside, you slowly slid a finger into your pussy, the slight stretch making you moan around Changbin’s erection. You started off with the right tempo, moving your fingers almost in sync with the movements of your mouth. However, after adding an additional finger, you had started focusing more on getting yourself off than on sucking Changbin’s cock. His moans had gotten a pitch higher as he desperately begged for his release. 

“Please go faster, I’m so close.” 

You attempted to increase your speed, but were still more focused on your own fingers pumping in and out of you, your thumb circling your clit. Your legs started to shake as your toes curled, moaning loudly as you came on your fingers, clamping your legs shut and breathing heavily, but still not releasing Changbin from your mouth. He groaned loudly as the vibrations of your moan traveled up his shaft. With an increased pace and a tighter grip you started sucking his dick once again, an embarrassingly loud slurp or gag could occasionally be heard from you, along with Changbin’s groans. You heard him curse, mumbling “I’m cumming, I’m cumming.” as his dick twitched in your hand. You released his dick from your mouth, tapping the tip on your tongue as he came, some of his hot load ending up on your face. You continued to stroke his dick until his knees grew weak from over sensitivity and he pulled away. You wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, feeling proud of yourself for having given both yourself and someone else such an amazing orgasm. You stood up from the floor, brushing yourself off and stretching your aching knees. Standing beside the door for a moment, you tried to hear if there was anyone else in the restroom before you took your leave. Changbin, who was trying to catch his breath, head still thrown back, this time leaning against the wall, stood up straight when he heard a door shut. He scrambled to put on his pants before dashing out of the toilet, hoping to catch a glimpse of whoever had given him what was arguably the best blowjob of his life. Yet he was only met with an empty room, and a security guard claiming that he had to leave immediately, as the club was closing. 

[slater-later]

I Want to Watch You Grow

Brian Kelly x Trans Masc Reader

Read it here on AO3 if you would like!

- This is a Brian Kelly x Trans Man reader fan fic. This conronicles your long term relationship with Brian and your development with yourself. Your body, and transition as a transman.

- I hope everyone enjoys this. Finds space within themselves and their relationship with the world. It’s okay to be trans, being trans is beautiful. it’s a difficult, glorious journey that is far more of a beginning then an end. Living happy life, being proud of yourself and your body.

- The fic is long, about 12 pages. So please, soak it in, and I wish you the happiest day!

The two of you had been dating for some time. You had met at a small high school party. A good group of friends coming together around a Summer bonfire, slipping your feet out from the well worn sandals and wiggling them infront of a fire. The soles of your feet toasted, turning them around to be goldened on both sides. You held a long metal skewer with two plump marshmallows on the end, rotating it around as you warmed it to a golden ball of glory.

It was sweet, being able to spend time with old friends and make some new. Your friend Ronnie had invited the skater kids from school to join you. He had bonded with them over their mutual love for rock and rap music. It made sense, they both loved Public Enemy. Blasting ‘We Got the Power’ out of their car radios whenever they had a chance. 

You enjoyed it, they threw out some good rhymes and it was a battle cry for your youth. You generation. You couldn’t help but bob your head to the music and belt along.

It was towards the end of the night when you two met. Brian had showed up late, hair slicked with a heavy line of sweat. A shirt quickly shoved into his pants, trying to clean up for his group of friends after a long day of skating.

He had skipped out of work that day- well, really, the restaurant was slow so there wasn’t much need for two busboys. He had spent the rest of his afternoon and late into the stary night, skating at the skatepark. The street lights clicked on and it had made it hard for him to see the clear edges of the ramps. It was time to turn in and get a bite to eat. Putting aside the new trick he caught from someone else. Trying to nail it. 

If he knew it could be done, then he could. He just needed enough time and perseverance to figure it out.

With skating, the possibilities were endless. It was his place to let go of life’s worries and focus on something where had complete control. The complete right to be, what and who he is, with no to tell him otherwise. Skating was like a lifeblood for him, his way of life.

His boundless universe.

He came jogging in, skateboard in hand as he approached the group huddled around the warm fire. 

The trees swayed, creaking under the age and weight of their own majesty with a long gust of wind. It was dark, the hum of Summer turning to a deep pitch of haze. Black rolling in, only to be illuminated by the glaze of starfull and a half crescent moon. The forest was thick, lulled by the hum of heated crickets and hushed by the cool breeze of night. Smoke pooling from the warm fire, whisping and licking up the sky with powerful might. Your toes curled, seeking a gentle relief from its delightful burning flame.

They were roasted and baked. You tucked them into the ground, shifting your heals to push back the brush and find a damp, cool, interior.

Brian waved, throwing an arm up to welcome everyone. A boy buzzed in the background, rolling a hit out of a cheaply made bong. Coughing as he blew out his lungs. Stoned till’ the cows come home.

“Hey guys! Sorry I’m late, it uh, took me a while to find you guys,” He smiled, strolling on into the circle and making his way over to Yabbo. Giving him a high five and saying hello to Buddy. 

You popped your marshmallow onto a graham cracker and some chocolate. You munched on your treat, washing it down with a sip of beer.

You watched Brian that night, catching his eyes as he chatted with Buddy over some trick he had been captivated by. Transfixed on trying to nail, to, gleam the cube. 

He noticed, his shit stain smirk would appear even in mid sentence. Hands flailing out, gesturing and expressing his exasperation on some wild tangent he was on about skating. About life. About love. It was amusing to watch him, loud and audacious as he was. He could even make Buddy loud, who was normally a quiet and reserved guy. Get him chuckling about some silly joke he made, and pairing it with an audacious face. Hands whipped out, a cross between a dragon and a gorilla.

You had finished off your second beer, musing with a friend about the stars as you gazed. Heads turned up, pondering the wide expanse of space. Its’ glorious bounds, its beauty, its’ wonder.

It put things in perspective for you. Not in a scary way, but in a comforting one. That sometimes, our emotions can feel massive. And they can be! But they also fall away, soothe and ease, as we realize, this shall pass. As all things. Even life. And so, what we must work towards is enjoying it. Like moments like these- feet kicked up on a stump, back eased into a lawn chair with a good beer in hand, spending time with friends. The summer breeze cooling your warm skin, still tanned and glowing from a long day spent outside. Walking, running, and spending time with those that mattered to you. You can’t steal back time, but instead, enjoy it.

Brian tapped Buddy’s shoulder, gesturing for him to shift over as he stood up. Slicking to the outside of the circle, making his way over.

He stopped at the bag of mellows, nabbing two and popping one in his mouth. Munching on its sugary goodness as he finished the trip. Sliding down and popping on the ground, criss-cross-apple-sauce style.

You picked your chin up from the stars, turning your head towards him, “Hey.”

“Hey,” He smiled tiredly, softly. It had grown late and the group had died down, calming and chatting amongst themselves. “So, I uh, don’t think I caught your name,” He mused, chuckling with an anxious delight. He had caught your fancy and talking to attractive people always made his insides flutter.

“It’s Y/N, what’s yours?” You smiled, letting out a tiny yawn, hand hovering over your mouth.

And on command, it was his turn. “Briannn.” He said, pushing through his wide open mouth, eyes turning to closed slits. Watering. 

“Jesus, I’m beat,” He muttered, whipping his eyes.

“You too?” You couldn’t stop, the two of you speaking through widely stretched mouths, yawning and releasing the tired souls of your body out into the air. Like ghosts being exercised. 

“Yeah!” He squeaked, putting his hand over his mouth. This time his mouth reaching out farther. As if a shark could unhinge its massive jaw.

Slowly, both of yours bodies cooled down. Chatted about the quiet, peaceful sounds of the forest. How the night made your feel alive, at ease within your own body. It was easy talking with such a nice man, cracking soft jokes and poking fun at the world. The politicians, the fat cats, and parents. Some stupid shit a drunk girl did at school, how the one guy on the football team fucked the head swimmer and stirred drama in the theatre group. He had been dating Jared, but it all fell for shit when he saw Sam in those swim trunks.

You both agreed, he looked mighty fine in the spandex speedo. And Tom did too, especially when he found out how kind he was.

“So who do you think is the biggest class clown? Don or Vinny?” You mused, shifting your weight in your seat. Turning towards him.

“Ahhh, I’m not so sure. Vinny is my man, but I really like Tabitha-”

“That bitch?” You shot, clicking your tongue. “She fucking stole $20 out of my backpack, fuck her!”

His eyebrows knitted, looking disappointed. “Yeahhh, she ain’t very nice. I disagree with you there,” He looked at the blaze, shaking his head. “But it’s not a ‘frienship’ competition. I give her props pouring that bottle of stinky slick on that jerk in Ceramics. That one that makes all those gross racist comments in school.” Fuck him for his piece of shit mind. There was no reason to be like that.

“-Ugh!” Your eyes rolled, shaking your head, “I know, I fucking hate him. He’s a piece of shit,” Internally you groaned, thinking of his disgusting face.

“For that, I respect her. The fool won’t change his mind and he needs to learn that he can’t do shit like that. It’s not like he’ll listen, I’ve tried,” He popped a mellow into his mouth, chewing. “She got 3 days of suspension for that. It was pretty ballsy,” Shitting on racist was both funny and satisfying. 

“What-? Why did she get that-?”

He shrugged, looking amazed, “I don’t know. It’s fucked up, that’s school for ya. It’s not right.”

You shook your head disgusted. If only they would understand, listen. “Ok, so, who has your favorite comedy?

“-Sam,” He smiled, poking a branch into the fire.

You watched him stir up the flame, picking at a log and turning it over. 

“Same, he’s really nice. He’s quiet but he has a smart tongue on him,” Slowly the fire grew. Emboldened by the new life, “Tom’s really lucky.”

Brian shot you a look, teeth flashing in a grin, “Cuz Jared’s so hot?”

You shot up in your seat, pushing yourself closer to him- “Okay though, right?!” Brian burst out laughing, head thrown back as he boomed. 

You waved your hands up into the air, desperately. “He has those pecs! Those thick arms! I just wanna be hugged by him!” He was a big tall teddy bear! A muscular one too! Who doesn’t love a big teddy bear?!

“I know, I know!” He slapped his knee, face red and warm, and it wasn’t from the booze. “He’s cute! He’s really cute!” He laughed, smiling through his big open mouth.

The two of you talked for the rest of the night, making another round of smores and sipping on the last of your cold beer. It was easy, talking to him. You found a kind of warm comfort and acceptance by such a free soul. By someone who really just wanted to be seen and heard, and loved for who he was.

*****

That night would bloom into many others. A few months you spent together, as friends, and the others, as lovers. You slowly got to know each other over time progressed. Eventually, love bloomed. Infatuation took to desire, day dreaming about the next time you’d see him. Hand propping your chin, staring off into a whiteboard filled with math equations as the teacher droned on. The last week of school was a buzzkill, bittersweet, and painfully long. 

You wanted it to end. For it to be Summer, to be scott-free and without responsibilities. But that also brought changes and your second stage of life was on the horizon.

****

The time came and both of you decided to take a year off from college. Work and save up some money. Spend time together as much you can. 

You planned on going away to school a few hours away. Brian hadn’t quite decided, but it looked to be the same. 

Both of you would attend the same school and it would work out well. Eventually, you both got through the next four years with your brains intact for the better. He majored in music production with a minor in entrepreneurship. He wanted to do something in music, start his own band and maybe build his own label. You majored in _____ and loved it. And your relationship had lasted, strengthened. Finding a quiet peace and home in one another. A thing you quietly wished for in your heart and didn’t know you needed until you found it.

The freedom to be yourself with another. One who would love and accept you, regardless of the circumstances and the changes.

But it didn’t always make it easy. You had been having feelings about your body. Ones that you didn’t quite like and found increasingly frustrating to have. To not have the words, the names, to understand and express how you felt.

You already knew you weren’t straight. That had long been established to yourself and to Brian’s knowledge. He didn’t care- well, that wasn’t quite the right way to put it. He was supportive of your queerness and actually encouraged it. You both were fluid as a snake- bodies and gender thrown right out of the door. What mattered was the person, the attraction, and the two of you- had a lot of that for one another.

He also wasn’t one to put up many questions about the way you dressed. Switching out fem for? Masculine? He was game. He liked your style, even sowed on some patches on your jacket when he asked. Though as time wore on, catching the way you shield away from your chest… Your feelings about your body… He noticed. 

“Hey babe?” He slid into the frame of the doorway, hand grasping the side of the wood as he leaned in. Watching you do your hair, clothed, and fixing your hair.

“Yeah? What’s up?” You looked at him through the mirror, running a comb through your head. “Is my coffee ready?”

“Yeah, it’s on the kitchen table. With your toast,” He walked in, looking quiet. Tentative. “Can I talk to you about something?”

You turned, “Yeahhhh…” Your voice fluttered, knowing that face he makes. It made you uneasy. “What do you wanna talk about?”

“Are you… alright? You’ve been distant lately, like somethings on your mind,” He paused, looking down. Guilty, “Did I do something wrong? Are we alright?” He leaned his back against the wall, thumbs hooked into his jean pockets. Glancing up at you.

You set down the brush, turning, “Yeah,” You coed softly. Tenderly to the sweet man, “We’re okay, I’m just going through some stuff,” It was easier to put that into words. You needed time to figure things out, to share how you felt. You didn’t even have them for yourself, at least not clearly.

You hoped time would reveal itself, help your understand and work through what you were feeling.

And you didn’t know how it would change you. Or, for the matter, Brian. Your relationship with him.

He gestured to you, beat, “Do you.. Wanna talk about it?”

It fell on silence, unsure.

“Yes… but not now. I need some time,” You stepped, drawing his eyes.

“Like… how long?” It was bugging him, an itch he can’t scratch. A problem he saw, a frustration he can’t touch.

It was yours, and one that effected him. He wanted you happy and content.

To ease your pain.

“I’m not sure,” You slipped a hand into his and locked fingers together. Drawing his hand up and lined your hips with his. Brian’s other slip around your waist, pulling you close. “You’re going to have to wait, to trust me until I’m ready to talk about it. But I do love you- and it’s not because of you,” You pressed your lips to his, slowly lifting them away. “Or something you’ve done. We’re okay.”

“Alright, I just-” He looked into your eyes, vulnerable. “I want you to be happy, no matter what. Whatever it is.”

“And I thank you for that, I really do. I appreciate it,” Another press, lips locked, tongues twisting for a moment. 

“Oh? Is someone?” 

You laughed, caught red-handed, “Yeah, a bit.” You mused.

****

And for a while, it was left like that. You ordered yourself a proper binder and he was properly happy for you, seeing you excited to go and slip it on as soon as it came in the mail. You checked yourself out in the mirror, beaming as you found a sense of newfound confidence and comfort in your appearance. Your body.

He liked the way you smelled after you changed deodorants. You smelled rich and musky, one that you both adored. For him, it was intoxicating. Even picked up your armpit in bed as you yelped, his head buried in your pit to get a good whiff of your scent. Both of you sent laughing and shouting and you play fought in bed, beating back the monster you so endearingly loved.

“Fucking hell Brian!! Give me my arm back!”

“No! Never!” He bellowed, hand tightening around your wrist, pinning it against the wall as your feet kicked against him. He loved it, making you mad and crazy at the same time.

Tickling was your enemy! One that he used and abused, to get you laughing and squirming as he tied his body around yes. Pressing kisses to your cheek like a woodpecker.

****

Eventually, you found answers. The internet helped and a good stack of books about gender. It worked to ease your feelings about your body and the amount of envy you had for the masculine. It was difficult at first, being able to sort through attraction and gender envy at the same time. Slowly, you found answers. A confirmation of your feelings and way of life. The amount of euphoria you received when the simple stranger called you ‘man’ or ‘sir’ felt glorious. Elating and at home with yourself in a way that felt right. A homecoming.

You started to approach the subject with Brian. The two of you were friends with trans people, but it still felt fresh. Weird, and confusing to go through yourself. Being trans still didn’t give you cut and dry answers, it was a journey. A grey area because, even through they had gone through that journey, it was still personal. You had to find answers for yourself and the world is a weird, wild place.

But, it didn’t mean you were something else. Or strange for that matter- you were you, and that’s what mattered. You were exploring.

You two had been laying in bed. A quiet Saturday day spent outside, running errands and going to the farmers market to buy fresh produce and bread. It was lovely and peaceful. You guys had turned into bed early, curled under a soft comforter as you sprawled out in bed. The sun had set.

“Hey,” You whispered, dusting a piece of long hair out of his face. He was turned towards you, a fit of blankets wrapped around him as his body cupped towards yours. 

“Hey,” He yawned, eyes fluttering in sleepiness.

You dusted a finger along his jaw, his chest slowly rising and falling. A ham all baked like a warm potato. “Can we talk?”

He shifted his head closer to your touch, liking the way you slowly stroked his skin. “Yeah, what’s up?” He yawned.

“I’ve been thinking, for a while now. That I might be trans,” You paused, wanting to release the next few words from your brain. “I think I am.”

“Oh?” He shifted up, sitting up now and trying to wake up his brain. Serious conversation time. “Really?” His voice was kind, asking for confirmation.

You nodded, “Yes.”

“As in nonbinary or trans masc?” He ran a hand through his hair, swooping the fluff back. Pulling himself together.

You laughed, feeling the butterflies swarm in your stomach. “Trans masculine.”

“Okay,” he smiled, nodding. Taking it in. “So uh, what do you want to do? If anything at all?”

“Honey-” You pestered, giving him a look.

“I’m asking! That’s up to you!” He was ginger, trying not to pry but dying inside. The questions!

“Clothes, that’s for one thing.”

“You’re already wearing my boxers- we gotta get you more of those.”

You had been stealing them from him. They were comfy, among other things. You couldn’t help but crack a guilty smile. He had mentioned it before when he had ran out, pissed because he hated wearing dirty ones.

“And shirts, and some good cuffed jeans-” You added.

“Dickie’s has those, we can thrift you Carhart’s from Goodwill.”

You paused, holding your breath. Holding onto the next few words, as if they couldn’t be taken back. Releasing them into the world, “And transitioning. I think I want to do that too.” 

He reached for your hand, his thumb stroking your palm as the two of you laid in bed. Him looking down at you as your sprawled out, your elbow propping yourself up. “Okay, if that’s what you want, I support you. I want that too,” He pulled up your hand and pressed his lips to them softly. Firmly intertwining his fingers with yours, squeezing them tightly. Securely.

“Do you want to go by different pronouns? A name?”

“Yes, I want to be named Y/N,” You smiled, feeling his hands pull you in.  Draw around you in a deep hug as he slid down to your level, comforting and embracing you. “I want to go by he/him pronouns.” You chuckled against his skin, head buried into the crook of his neck.

“Well hello my Prince, I’m so glad to meet you Y/N,” He pressed a kiss to your cheek, smiling through it as your heart brust. Crying in relief, in tears of joy and relief.

“You’re not mad?” You squeaked, tears rolling down your cheek.

“Baby~” He purred, pulling back, to look into your eyes. “Of course not, I want you to be happy. You’re precious to me,” He said, soothing you. “Is this what’s been bothering you?”

You nodded.

“I’ve been… wondering about it,” He mused. “I kinda figured it out after you bought your binder and started shaving your face. You barely had peach fuz but you looked so happy… so, much more bright that day,” You had slowly been trying things out. Listening to your body and how you felt. Changing your style, presenting more masculine. You even bought clothes from the men’s section and started to let go using gender specific pronouns for yourself. To ease the pain of dysphoria while you figured out feelings. Your therapist helped. 

“But I’ve been waiting until you tell me, that’s your stuff,” He wiped your chin, brushing off the stream of tears. “I know you’d tell me eventually, whatever your answer was- I want to support you. I chose that long ago, I stand by that.” He smiled, adding, “And if things change in the future, that’s okay too. Gender and bodies are a tricky thing.”

There was so many choices- my so options- in how trans people choose to express themselves. All of them are valid, it’s what makes you happy is the most important thing. What aligns with yourself.

“Thank you,” You sniffled, peaking out a smile. You were happy, and now tired, and just wanted to curl up in bed. The rush of emotions flooding your system, the bent of stress and relief washing over your system. Draining you. 

You wanted to feel this moment in its security, its acceptance. “That means a lot to me Brian.”

“Of course- and for what it matters-” He leaned into your ear, whispering, “I think you make a handsome man. And will continue too.” 

“It doesn’t change things- between us?”

He shrugged, unfazed, “I don’t think so. I’m attracted to you and I like men so-” Another quizzical look, “I don’t see how it would change things in that department. I think I need to know more but I don’t think so.”

You raised an eyebrow, “What do you mean?”

“I want to read more about it so I can help you. I know it can be hard for trans people to get the resources they need to transition. We’re going to both go through this and I want to help you. -If that’s what you want, of course.”

“Oh! Okay,” you nodded. You slid down together, laying in each others arms. Curled underneath the seats, your tears dried up. Heart shining. “I want that, your help. I fucking hate calling the doctors office.”

He laughed, “I know! I know!” You would get stressed, talking on the phone could be weird sometimes. It made you anxious.

You tucked your head into his chest, hearing it beat with the life you held so closely. His arms wrapped around your waist, holding you close. “Thank you Bri, for everything.”

“Of course Y/N,” He spoke softly, warm. “I love you, you’re my everything.”

The two of you drifted off to sleep in bed, listening to the sound of Summer rain come in through the window. Drops slapping against the hard concrete, easing you into a deep slumber.

****

The two of you got along better after that. You were able to save up enough money to see a gender therapist. A general practice doctor that specialized in transgender health, giving you access to the hormone treatments you so desperately needed.

The changes came slow at first, the T being newly added to your system. Eventually, the body hair came in. Sprouting up your legs and turning thicker, darker, up your knees. Your body weight shifted, redistributing around your body with a healthy addition of exercise. Your jaw widened, spotting itself with facial hair which you so proudly grew. Cleaned up and trimmed, sculpting it to your desire. 

That was one of your favorite moments. When you asked Brian to show you how he shaved his face. He pulled out of his bag of clippers, helped you learn how to wash your face and spread shaving cream on your face. How to guide the razor against your skin, trimming the well grown facial hair.

“-Like this- you gotta go against the grain if you want it smooth,” You were both creamed up, with your hair clipped back. He had a headband pushing his strands back, keeping it from falling into his face.

“Okay,” You mumbled in front of the mirror, guiding the razor across your skin. Wincing when you nicked yourself and hoping you don’t do that again.

“It’ll get easier, trust me,” He assured, slicking the last bit of cream off of his clean face. He mostly kept himself clean shaven, though there was a time where he rocked a thin mustache. Even some musky stubble around his cheeks. Which you loved.

And so was your transition. 

In time, you qrew to love and enjoy your body even more. Seeing the face you so expected- and wished for- being reflected in the mirror. Muscles come in, adjusting your body shape to one that you desired.

Brian was very supportive. Even helped you find a good doctor for your top surgery. He pitched in money for your procedure, taking some extra hours as the store manager at the record shop where he worked. He was planning on taking it over from the owner in a few years. He had helped them expand into a second storefront. He was proud of it.

He drove you to your surgery, making sure you had everything prepared. Extra magazines, music, books, even your sketch pad and journal if you so wished it. You would sleep after your surgery in the hospital bed, groggy and tired from the boat load of meds and painkillers lulling you to a peaceful state. He wanted to make sure you were content, that you healed well and passed the time while you recovered. The tiny hospital tv having few channels to capture your attention. He ready to help you pass the time.

After your surgery, you couldn’t move your arms very much. At least not above your head. It would pull at your incisions, the area bruised and draining of fluids. He would tend to you, changing your bandages and helping you get things from the kitchen cupboards. Asking you to relax and let him take over- when you insisted on cooking dinner. That you felt fine, that the pain wasn’t too bad. Even though your chest ached, he didn’t want you to push yourself.

It was okay to lean on someone else, to let them tend to you at times in need.

He adored you and embraced the new found man you had become. He liked hearing you softly talk into his ear, listening to how your voice had dropped. Had changed, deepened, and thickened. It was an adventure for the both of you, one that you happily embraced and found a new home. In you, yourself, and each other.

He was proud to call you his boyfriend, his favorite man on Earth.

[visceryl]

Forget Me Not

@hogwartsmystory and I co-wrote a short story involving Jaxson (Ethren’s brother) and Konnor a few years after the Order. Hal Greywind belongs to @one-very-angry-hufflepunk and Idmon Malin belongs to @zuulosdovah ------

The pitter of rain bounced off the roof of the colonial farmhouse and dripped down every window. It had rained from first daylight to evening, turning the grounds outside to muddy puddles, while animals sought shelter in barns and enclosures sparsely populated throughout the owned land. 

Inside, the dim glow of a single living room lamp and the hearth of a fire lit up the room where Konnor lounged tiredly in a reclining armchair. His feet propped up atop a fluffy mass of white fur as a large dog chewed idly at a cow ankle bone that crunched beneath its jaws. A book’s spine was broken across the arm of his seat, untouched for hours unlike the glass of red wine he turned in his grasp.

Somehow the day off work had been longer and more exhausting than if he’d gone. With no papers to keep up with or assignments to see to, Konnor was left to his thoughts alone in the empty house he called home. Hal and Charlie had invited him over to stave away the blues of the day, but as he denied every year, he’d insisted anniversaries shouldn’t be skipped.

Even the bad ones.

The glass lifted to the edge of his lips as he took down a long sip and set it on the nearby side table. In his other hand, he gripped tightly to the crumpled and dirted remains of a photograph. Taken several years back in shoddy quality and with minimal color, a light leak consumed the entire lower half of it. But the importance of it remained. Grouped all together, Konnor could still make out the faces of those he’d joined the Order with. Talbott, Chiara, himself, Hal, Tonks, Ben, Eileen, Ethren. 

He sucked up a breath and his gaze tore from the photograph. His head knocked to the cushioned back of his chair. Like flashes of moments from harder times, they lingered in his mind. The day of the final battle nearly broke him. He ended it with several broken ribs and a scar that ran from his hip down to his thigh, but the worst injury had been the heartbreak after, when bodies were fished from where they laid. 

A crack of lightning flashed outside the window, followed by the rolling boom of thunder that shook the shudders. Konnor parted from his thoughts to rub a hand over his face, massaging tiredly at a temple. Beneath him, the Great Pyreneese stirred and gathered to her feet before making off for the kitchen.

“Yeah, I get it. Bit too miserable in here, huh?” he called after the dog. The picture was set aside his wine glass with another fleeting glance before he drew the book in hand again. It was some shitty mystery novel to pass the time. 

Konnor read for another half hour until he came to a stop at the end of a page, hardly remembering a single word from the entire chapter. Too distracted. Another gulp of wine disappeared behind his lips. Mourning the dead was like getting your soul devoured by dementors. 

He lost himself to thought again, droning out to the crackle of the fire as the rain relentlessly poured outside. Then a knock came. Several harsh repetitive raps that sent Iris into a loud barking frenzy from the other room. “Quiet, quiet!” Konnor yelled out, pushing up onto his feet. He crosses the room, quietly muttering to himself about how Hal couldn’t leave well enough alone. But that wasn’t who he found.

As the door swung open, Konn straightened in surprise, half shielded from the gust of wind and rain. 

A cold, unforgiving rain poured down from the angry grey clouds above. It pelted the tattered, brown leather duster of the man who stood beneath its rage, auburn hair plastered against his face. 

Konnor's eyes widened. "Jax?" 

"Konnor." Tired bags hung under his eyes and rain dripped off the end of his nose. "Mind if I come in?" 

Konnor shielded himself half behind the door from the blustering wind. "It's late. Why are you all the way out here?" 

"Maybe I just needed to drink with someone other than a little kid." Jaxson caught on to the look of disapproval on the man's face in seconds. "Don't worry," he mumbered, long fingers fishing through his hair. "I didn't just leave him alone. Summer has him for the night."

Konnor sighed. "Come on in," he murmured as Jax stomped into the house, shaking his hair out like a wet dog. "You really need to stop bouncing him around so much. It's probably confusing. And uh... pick your poison." He motioned to a liquor cabinet near where the TV rested. 

"It's better than being stuck with me. Believe me." 

“Maybe when you get like this, yeah.”

Jaxson made a beeline for the whiskey. He swiped up a bottle and heaved down into one of the chairs. The neon glow of the screen reflected in dull eyes, and wordlessly the man tipped the bottle back. 

Konnor eased down next to him, eyes searching the man. "If you're going to drink me dry, you can at least tell me what's going on." 

"What. Can't just come over and visit my brother's best friend?" 

"Then you should know better. I'm practically a professional at dealing with you emotionally constipated Whitecross boys. And you don't make a habit of visiting. I'm always hunting you." 

"The kid keeps me busy. Sorry." Jaxson took another long gulp. Red had flushed onto his cheeks. 

His eyes caught the photograph that Konnor had left on the table. The Order always made sure to photograph its members... to remember those gone, or killed during the war effort. That particular one... had been the recruits of 1995.

Ethren. 

Jaxson dragged his gaze away, heart twisting into painful knots. “...Ethren and Tonks?”

Konnor grimaced. “...I always pull that dusty old thing out on the battle’s anniversary.” He retrieved his own wine glass, polishing the dwindling remainds and held out the glass. "Don't leave me out. How is Alaire doing? Feels like time has flown." 

Jaxson sighed. "Perfect," he murmured as he poured the man a glass. "Somehow, he's managed to dodge a bullet. He doesn't have his dad's cynicism, or his mother's cruelty. He's... growing up to be a very kind and thoughtful boy."

"..he's three now, right? Think you'll consider preschool for him? He'll just end up going to Hogwarts or Ilvermorny, but muggle schools before then aren't so bad." 

Jaxson's jaw tightened. "I... I was thinking of just schooling him myself. At first." 

Konnor arched a brow. "Yourself? No offense, Jax, but what do you know about current day curriculum? You're already here looking like death just getting by as is." 

Jaxson's teal gaze flashed with a sudden rush of anger. "I'll manage!" He shouted, cracks tearing down the cup. A deep breath followed, as fingers massaged his face. "...it'll be fine." 

He sounded more like he was trying to convince himself. 

"You're not alone, you know," Konnor said, his voice gentle. "In any of it." He stared down into his own glass. "I know you think you have to do it all yourself... but it's not healthy for you. Or the kid. Ethren wouldn't want this for you."

"Ethren's dead. Doesn't matter what he wants." 

"That's horseshit. Don't make him come haunt your ass." "Horseshit?" 

The edge of Jaxson's lip lifted. “...he's gone. Enjoying whatever paradise he's found, or maybe just...nothing. It's us, the ones who survived who are fucked over." 

"Well, I'm sure as hell am not going to sit here and wallow because he made a dumb decision." Konnor's eyes searched Jaxson's face. "There's still stuff we can do. We can live our lives now. I put everything I had on the line to make sure of it just like he did, and now his kid can have a good life and a family if you'd just let him have that. You can't push all your shit onto that little boy."

Jaxson's eyes were tinted with red as he stared down at his hands. Calloused, and decorated with the scars of nails digging into his palms. With a breath, they curled into fists. "I know. Alaire... he doesn't deserve that. I need to get over it. That's why I'm here. I need your help.”

Konnor grabbed Jaxson's shoulder. "Ethren was my best friend. Anything, Jax." 

"It's come to my attention that you're proficient in a rare caliber of magic." Jaxson glanced over. "You know how to obliviate."  

Konnor's hand lifted up from his shoulder and hovered. "...I learned it in the order." His eyes narrowed. What does that have to do with you?" 

"Take him away." Jaxson's voice unraveled into a whispered beg, and he snatched Konnor's hand in a desperate grasp. "Ethren. Please. I... I can't do it anymore."

Silence lifted from Konn as a wave of sadness twisted his features into something soft and knowing. He sighed, letting his shoulders fall. “You can’t seriously be asking me that, Jax. I can’t do that… It’s not right. I know it hurts but that pain is something you have to push through.”

“What’s the point!?” Jaxson snapped. “It’ll never go away! It… it fucking hurts. And it's hurting the kid too. I can’t be this broken husk taking care of Alaire, he deserves better!”

“Obliviating those memories won’t help you any. It's dangerous. It creates holes. Empty spaces... If you completely cut ties with everything that could remind you of him, maybe it could work but that's not the case. Which is why I'm saying you can lean on all of us. We can help you get back on your feet and manage that pain. To give the kid a good life.”

“It’s not enough.”

“It has to be, Jaxson. It’s all we’ve got.”

Jaxson tore up to his feet, knocking the bottle of whiskey aside and it teetered on the end table. Konnor quickly leaned to catch it from spilling as the older man tangled his fingers up through his hair. “You know…” he finally growled. Jax locked his gaze on Konnor. “I thought you of all people would understand.”

Shock rippled over and Konnor pushed up after him. “I do understand. I know where this is coming from, but it’s not the answer.”

“You took Allston’s memories!” His eyes clouded with a lingering wetness. “He was your own brother. How dare you deny me what you did for yourself!”

“Don’t,” Konnor snapped sharply. In a few short steps he got right up into Jaxson’s face, the roots of his hair beginning to bleed from pink to a darker red. The two were level with another, tension crawling between them. “I have to live with what I did every damn day! I have to miss him like he's as good as dead! I took his memories so he would live, Jaxson. You know how easily I could have forgotten him too?! But that's not the point. The point is we have to remember for them. To protect what is left."

“And what about what I want?! Allston didn’t even ask for you to take his memories, you forced it on him. This is… This is something I want! If you were able to take the coward’s way out then I have every right to do the same.”

Crack.

It happened in a flash. A cold anger burned and strangled in Konnor’s throat as the rest of his hair bled with crimson rage and his fist snapped against Jaxson’s jaw. Then he shoved him. With fingers wrenched up in his jacket, Konnor sent Jaxson to the ground. “Don’t you dare call me a coward! What I did saved my brother’s life, I’m not running from what I did. You… you don’t get to come here and do this to me, Jaxson!” He grasped at his throbbing knuckles, turning away as the sting of tears met his eyes. “Especially not today. I lost my best friends. My brother. And you want to call me the coward?”

Jaxson caught himself on an arm as he hit the ground. Stunned. Fingers drifted to the dull ache of his jaw before his teeth ground together, ignoring the slightest twinge of metal on his tastebuds. For a long while he didn’t meet Konnor’s gaze and when he did, a faint sheen of wetness marred his cheeks. “I can’t make it like this,” he whispered. “I’m trying to save my life. I…” His voice cut off in a choke and he bowed over to hide his face. “Everything I did. Everything I was, it was to keep him safe. Now...now.. What am I supposed to do!?”

The hurt strangled in Konnor’s chest. “Find something,” he hissed bitterly. His hands shook and he fell back onto the couch, collapsing to sink his face into his palms. “Find even the tiniest shred of happiness and live. We don't get fairytale endings, Jax, we just have to make the most of what's left and you've got a whole lot waiting for you with Alaire." He dared glance up, wiping a sleeve across his own face. “I’ll be damned if I lose another one of you because you couldn’t stop dwelling on one single thing.”

“An arrow killed Ethren.”

“An arrow didn’t god damn kill him, Jax!” Konnor lashed. He retrieved the bottle up from the table and knocked it back for a long swig to ease the matching ache of his fist and heart. “He couldn’t move on. He couldn’t let go of the poison that is Merula fucking Snyde. She was never going to be good for him.”

Jaxson hadn’t moved from his place on the floor, staring down absently at his own hands. “You mean his obsession.”

“What else?! You’re all selfish bastards. Chasing after your obsessions like starving dogs with little regard for who it ends up hurting.”

“Is that why you did it, then? Allston couldn’t move on?”

Konnor let a sad chuckle rattle from his chest. Angry locks of fiery red had returned to their soft, white shade. "Towards the end.. my cover got blown with some death eaters. I hadn't seen Allston in a while and it seemed like I never would. I was hunted and somehow.. somehow the second I was cornered he was there. He got himself captured and tortured and I know the only reason he knew was because he was doing things illegally. When I found him I got him out, Jax. Before he could kill himself."

“...Sounds like your brother and I have a lot in common then.” Jaxson drew a sharp breath as a tear dripped down from the tip of his nose. “I’m afraid. I’m afraid of falling into the same things he did. Falling until it… I just want to stop feeling like this. How am I supposed to move on?”

"...do what Ethren couldn't. What Allston couldn't. Let go. Be what they couldn't be. Be someone who cares for who they have left, even on bad days." 

"That feels impossible," Jaxson muttered. Still on his hands and knees, his fingers gripped his soaking wet shirt, like he was trying to grab at his heart. "I feel like my soul died with him. I wouldn't have made it this far if I didn't have Alaire."

"Maybe you two should go on a vacation. Go somewhere new for a couple weeks... find your soul again, being his guardian the right way. You cut away from your family wealth, right? Look, I'd cover it for you." 

"..yeah. Sounds great." Jaxson's voice was numb. Cold. Slowly, he pushed to his feet. "Thanks, Kon. Sorry for... this." 

Jaxson went for the door. Konnor chewed on his lip and exhaled in an exasperated breath. "Stop." He motioned to the cushion beside him. "Stay the night, Jax. I think... we can afford a night of booze and talking about him. A night to break." 

Jaxson didn't turn. "I thought the point was to not break." 

"The point is to not let it consume you." Konnor's let his gaze travel to the picture on the mantle. His smile was sad. "We're just people,” he murmured as he pushed up to take it in hand. His thumb drew over Ethren’s face, and he ignored the sharp twist of his heart. “We hurt. We ache. Sometimes, things feel like it's too much. So a night of drinking and accepting that is good, every once in a while. Otherwise, we just burn out."

Jaxson's head turned. Rather than anger... appreciation glittered in his eyes and he sighed. "Guess that's true," Jaxson said. "Won't do Alaire any good to pick him up and still be wallowing," he muttered as he eased down into the seat. 

Konnor followed close after, tipping the bottle his way. "Did Ethren ever tell you about our trip to Paris?" 

"You two went to Paris?" 

"Oooh yeah. He put me on his damn death trap of a bike." Konnor shook his head with a snort. "Your dad was screwing my mom, so we decided to pay a visit and have a luxury dinner on them after." 

Jaxson stared at Konnor for a long while before laughter bubbled from him. The first semblance of a real smile. "That... really doesn't surprise me. Our dad... he was always with other women until..." Jaxson's eyes darkened. His jaw tightened and he downed another gulp. 

"...I know. My dad's dead and my mom is basically dead to me. Aren't we just pathetic?" 

"Ethren wasn't," Jaxson muttered. "When mom was in danger... he dropped everything to find her. Even used all the unforgivable curses. He would have torn down the world to get to her." He leaned back. His wet hair flattened against the back of the sofa, and the neon light of the television reflected in his eyes. "That was just the kind of person he was. Friend, family... lover. When he bonded with someone, he would never give up on them." 

"You really idolized him, didn't you...?" 

"Idolize him?" Jaxson considered that. "Guess it's only natural to talk about... the good things when someone isn't here anymore. But no... I didn't idolize him." Jaxson snorted and leaned forward, auburn bangs falling with him. "Ethren was selfish. Selfish and obsessive and downright cowardly , at times. He didn't want to live for himself, so he lived on the whims and needs of others. And when he did want to live for himself, he threw it away, for a war he should have never been a part of and a girl that never deserved him."

"Good. I'd have to hit you again." Konnor stared at his knuckles, already beginning to bruise. Likewise, Jax's jaw was swelling in a rush of blue and black. "We had a no bullshit policy. Sometimes, while we were in the Order, I'd make a phone call to him or he'd make one to me. Like we weren't at war, and no time had passed... we'd laugh or talk or cry or curse until we lost our voices. Something like that would completely undo the stress of having to get up the next day and go right back into a room full of enemies." He grimaced. His hair had dulled to a bluish grey tint. "We had a deal that after everything was over, a few of us would high tail it to some remote island and piss away a few weeks." 

"Yeah?" Jaxson said quietly. "Probably Tredyffrin Island... the one  our family owns... no one ever goes there anymore. It would have been perfect." The elder brother sighed and poured himself another glass. He stared at the downpour of red pooling at the bottom of the crystal goblet while thunder roared outside the glass window. "He made me a lot of promises, too. Like when he was an uncle, he was going to spoil the shit out of whatever kid Idmon and I adopted. He insisted he'd never have a kid of his own." Jaxson dragged a sharp breath. "...fuck."

"Everything changed... you ever still think about giving Alaire someone to grow up with?" 

"...no. Between Idmon and I... we probably only have enough sanity between us for one brat. And that's with the girls' help. Aisling and Summer... they’re absolute life savers."

 "Well, I can't blame you for that," Konnor said with a tired smile. "Shit, I always imagined a family and kids one day, but... I think after everything, I've only got it left in me to help all of you guys manage your own rascals. Hal and Charlie have two right next door. And ever since Barnaby found out I've got my own little menagerie, he drags Aisling and their kids over all the time. And Alaire is always welcome." 

"He's been so excited to come back and see Uncle Kon." Jaxson's smile was short-lived. "...how do you manage it all?" 

"Depends on what you mean by 'all.'" 

"Losing Allston. You'll never be able to talk to him again. Losing Ethren... Tonks... Your dad...everything." 

"Well, if you haven't noticed, I have a healthy supply of alcohol. But I don't make a habit out of that, my position requires me sober, obviously." He swished his drink thoughtfully. "What really drives me is knowing what all I've still got. Lots of people still want and need me around." 

"I don't actually want to forget him," Jaxson whispered. "Remembering the good times...it's part of what pushes me forward. And Alaire deserves to know those stories. It just seems so much... harder this way." 

"I know." Konnor leaned over, and his fragile fist punched Jaxson's shoulder lightly. "Don't ever ask me to take away your memories again. That magic can go right to hell." 

Jaxson smirked. "...Ethren always hated that spell. He said to be obliviated... it was the deepest violation a person could endure. Those memories are precious." He gave a deep breath and lifted his goblet. "...to remembering the fallen. And living in their honor." 

Konnor lifted his glass in turn. "Help me finish this bottle, and the guest room will have your name written all over it."

-------

Morning came with the promise of clear skies. As the sun painted the sky a beautiful array of pinks and purples that began to open up to the blue of day, Konnor rolled to the other side of the bed with a tangle of sheets around his legs. At the end of his bed, Iris snoozed with soft snores. 

From downstairs he could hear the rustle of footsteps cascading against the hardwood floors and with a tired rub of his head, Konnor swung himself to stand from the bed. His hair poked out in all directions as his hands raised up in the air and a series of pops crawled up his spine. “Jax?” he called out through the house.

No answer.

Konnor sighed and crossed the room with last feeble attempts to pat his platinum hair down into something presentable. The stairs winding down from the hallway just outside his room creaked with each step. He passed several pictures of Hal, Charlie, and the twins on the way down until his feet stalled on the bottom step. 

Jaxson stood at the doorway in the living room, dragging his jacket over his shoulders.

“You’re leaving?”

Jax’s gaze darted up. He looked rough. From the clear as day hangover to the black and blue bruise in the size of a small fist surrounding the right side of his jaw. “...Yeah. I figured I’d leave you to your day.”

“You could always stay for breakfast, you know. Bet you could use it.”

“Nah, I should probably go pick Alaire up. But uh… Konnor?”

Konnor finally touched down into the living room, flicking on the light to join the flecks of light illuminating from the window. “What’s up?”

“Sorry for last night, and thanks. I needed that.”

“Yeah I’ll bet you needed that knuckle sandwich. Just don’t be so much of a stranger. You better haul yourself and Alaire back over here soon or I’m going to lob you another one.”

Jaxson hid the beginnings of a smirk. “Do that and I’ll have to get you back. Don’t worry, we’ll visit soon. I think I just need some time to clear my head first.”

“Then do that. You can always call too, and tell Alaire I say hi.”

Fingers curled around the doorknob, opening it ever so slightly. “I will.” He opened the door, and all but fell backwards as a small toddler came barreling into the house to cling to his legs. 

“Found you!” Alaire giggled as he buried his face into his Uncle’s leg and Jaxson blinked. 

“Alaire?! How did you-”

“Summer mentioned that you’d gone for the night... and that you might need me.” That voice. He’d know that voice even in a symphony of voices. Idmon Malin came from around the corner, blue eyes soft, his smile kind as he lifted Alaire up into his arms. Blonde hair fell down his back. “I thought I might drop- Merlin’s beard, Jaxson, are you all right?” 

Jaxson, still stunned at his boyfriend having shown up out of the blue, blinked. “W-wha?”

“Your face. Bloody- did you get hit with a bludger last night?”

“A...oh.” Red bled onto his cheeks as Idmon’s long, delicate fingers gently brushed his bruise. “No, there was an uh... accident last night involving an erumpent and a... uh-”

“I slugged him,” Konnor purred as he leaned against the doorframe.

Idmon snorted. “Well, I imagine he deserved it,” he said. As Alaire began to fuss, he put the child down and he rushed over to jump into Uncle Konnor’s arms and his gaze searched his lover. “...are you alright. You look... like a mess.”

Two short steps brought Jaxson to his boyfriend. His arms hooked tight around his shoulders and he rested his head against Idmon’s, a ragged breath drawing from his lungs. “...it was a long night.”

“..the anniversary,” Idmon whispered. His palm found Jaxson’s cheek. “You should have stayed with me..”

“Shouldn’t have run,” Jaxson agreed. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize... did you find what you were looking for..?”

“Uncle Konnor!” Alaire tugged on Konnor’s shirt. “Aunt Summer gave me a toy snitch!” 

“Did she?” Konnor lifted the boy up into his arms. “That was very sweet of her. And speaking of sweet... I think I have some biscuits in the cabinet. Want some?” 

Alaire giggled. “They’re cookies, biscuits are... biscuits!”

“Oh, no,” Konnor grinned as he tickled the squealing boy.  “Do not start that, your dad and I got into so many fights about cookies and biscuits!”

Jaxson’s eyes softened as he watched Alaire smile and hug Konnor around the neck. His hand found Idmon’s, squeezed, and gave a breath. “Yeah,” he whispered. “I think I did... let’s stay for a bit, then go home.”

[drake-the-incubus]

This is a gift for @striderhell from the Homestuck Secret Santa 2020 (@homestuckss). I was aiming for 3000 words but uh, Dirk as a muse didn’t want to continue exploring the concept of gender given his rigid but philosophical nature.

I hope this was good, and if not just gimme a shout and I’ll try and come up with something better. 

Word Count: 1521 Fandom: Homestuck Characters: Dirk Strider, Roxy Lalonde Relationships: Dirk Strider & Roxy Lalonde (Platonic/Friends)

Additional Notes: Roxy uses He/Him and They/Them, I’ve never finished the epilogues but I love NB Rox. Dirk uses no pronouns in this, as I wanted to try that out. 

Please enjoy Dirk exploring his gender. 

Sometimes in an effort to define ourselves, we feel trapped to conform to some rigid aspect or label in hopes to reach an understanding of who we are. At times this process can be frustrating and dissatisfying. Other people take weeks or days, and some of them take years or never figure it out. 

Perhaps gender, as a construct, can’t be fully understood, but we can understand ourselves as people without it. The tale before you, is only a short of someone who wishes to take a journey many end up doing, and most have never encountered.

Dirk was sitting in a cafe on Earth-C, sipping on a coffee in between tinkering with another pair of shades. The goal was updating and adding a better set of graphics, hoping to add some additional features to make things easier.

It had been a while since the Prince of Heart had seen the rest of the gods. Jake would visit once in a while, and they would have a friendly spar or talk. Roxy would message once in a while, letting Dirk know any spicy news about the rest.

Dave would randomly show up, they would stare each other down before both Striders would give a thumbs up and go their separate ways.

Rose would often come by, trading witty banter and wisdom. Both of them struggled with the massive impact of their god tiers and would often talk about it to one another.

Today though, Dirk decided a change of area would suit this project best, specifically needing to leave the workshop and enjoy some caffeine. Recently a problem developed that would continue to nag at the Prince even through the night. Lack of sleep was the reason why Dirk had picked a coffee shop. It made the most sense.

Gender did not.

Dirk had been going through a lot lately, and when Roxy had come out as trans, it had been taken pretty well by most of them. Not that it would be different if Dirk came out either, but rather that would take knowing what was going on.

This was a laughable moment, since they all had beaten the game, made it out and enjoyed their own little home in the midst of nothing. Creating entire worlds and civilizations with the help of their space and time players, but Dirk was sitting there, in a cafe, trying to figure out what gender even was and how it related to the god’s own identity.

Pronouns were hard, but so was even figuring this shit out. Making a copy of your brain at thirteen was much easier than figuring out if you’re cis or not, and Dirk didn’t know.

The more it was thought about, the more the thought cropped up, what if it turned out the being Cis wasn’t the result. Dirk was absolutely sure about not being a chick, nothing really appealed about that, but then again there was a very similar feeling over the current gender.

Man, agender or woman. Those were the categories that presented themselves currently. Working harder to connect the shades to the newly built chip, Dirk jolted when suddenly Roxy sat down across the table.

“I called out to you, but you didn’t answer.” He said leaning over and looking over the project. “I was wondering what made you change location, you’re pretty adamant to work in your workshop Dirkie.”

“I needed to think, which I was doing when you were calling out to me. Thinking so hard about creating a new line of orange pop with more caffeine than this cup of coffee that the world died out and I was left to only the one set of thoughts for once.”

He raised an eyebrow at that, and crossed his arms. “Really now? You think that I can’t tell something bigger is going on in that Strider head of yours? You’ve come up with projects while having a philosophical discussion with Rose and texting Dave a rap battle. You’re the king of multi-tasking, which also means your attention is usually divided more, and you’re attempting to put a wire on the wrong side of that.”

Dirk frowned and sighed, putting the project down. “Well, I can’t get nothing past you I suppose. I guess one thing that’s on my mind is how much I miss AR, since he was a good source of introspection, then again I have no idea if that would have helped in the first place.” Tapping fingers filled the space between them as the Prince looked outside at the billions of humans and trolls walking over the streets.

“I’ve been contemplating what gender is and how I relate to it since you came out as nonbinary. It’s been making me think about what is my gender, and I’ve come to the conclusion none of them really fit, but that’s also something to worry about since that means I don’t relate to any of the options-“

“Before you go on a long tangent, I want to ask, what are the options?” He interrupted Dirk while cocking his head.

“Agender, man and woman.” Dirk said bluntly, staring at Roxy. The laughter that resulted made the god tip the iconic shades down to stare at Roxy with deadpan orange eyes.

“I get greeted by your eye colour, score! But no, you got it all wrong, gender isn’t rigid categories, it’s a spectrum. You can’t define it by strict labels and there’s too many to count. So you don’t fit in three, there’s millions of genders. Some might not have a word for it right now. I’m nonbinary, but that’s because I’m not a man or a woman completely, I’m somewhere in the middle, closer to a man if I were to describe it as like, a sliding scale. So don’t be in a hurry, and don’t worry if you don’t figure it out.”

“I need to. Not knowing makes things difficult. I know it might be unhealthy to obsess over, but ever since I made Auto Responder, I had the need to understand myself fully and everything about myself.” With an elbow on the table, Dirk took a hand and raked it through the mess of hair. Having done so more than a hundred times earlier, the Prince was sure it was a complete and utter mess at this point, and would need to be taken care of at home.

“Well, I have a list of some of the other more known ones, maybe one of them check out for you?” He offered a tablet.

Dirk took it, and looked over the list of options and each description of it, mumbling under breath before placing the tablet back down with a definite, “I’m going to use Genderless for now and see what happens.” It looked interesting, the excerpt specifically outlined not having a gender at all due to neurodivergence, rather than lacking a gender or having no gender, different from agender. It didn’t feel much different from everything else, but nothing did. Having several of the entries be defined by one’s neurodivergence was weird, but the more thought placed into the concept, the more it felt real to Dirk. Rather it meant that the Prince would have to take Rose up on her offer to get a fully evaluation soon, even if both of them came to the conclusion Dirk was probably neurodivergent and that it wasn’t impactful with how the god had lived life before the game. 

“Are there any pronouns I should use for you?”

Pursing lips, Dirk gave a shake of the head. “None preferably. I think I need more time to actually think everything over. I have no positive or negative feelings for anything on there, and so I’m debating on if I’m everything or not. I can figure out how to make an exact replica of my own brain as a teenager, create robots, plot out the exact way I can kiss Jake and even save everyone's lives getting into the game. I’ve designed complex interactions to lead to the outcome I desire, and I can’t even pick a gender. This is quite frankly, ridiculous.”

“You don’t gotta. Dirk, it’s not about just picking a gender, it’s about figuring out a big part of yourself, and something most people don’t do for yours. You figured out you’re gay, now you’re figuring out what else you could be.” He placed a hand on Dirk’s and gave him a smile. “Whatever your result, I’m here for you. Even if you later think you’re a Cis man I’ll still be here for you. We might be siblings but we were friends first and that matters the most to me.”

Dirk gave a snort. “This is so fucking corny, but thanks Rox. I appreciate the love and support. Maybe I can treat you to another coffee since I feel like if I don’t buy one soon I’m going to be kicked out for making a mess of a window table.” Motioning towards the table, and standing up, the god stretched out. “What are you in the mood for?”

“Caramel Macchiato please.”

“Gotcha.”

[the-hate-keeps-me-warm]

I’ve been wanting to try my hand at writing more seriously for a while so here’s how the Salem Oscar meeting might go

Oscar awoke in a bed one made from stone sheets and blankets had been layered over it to presumably make it comfortable He was confused the last thing he remembered was sitting on the hover bike with ren no that wasn’t right there was something else ren yelled for some reason ren never yells but Oscar couldn’t quite remember why he decided to sit up as soon as he did waves of pain shot throughout his body the room was dimly lit and he could almost make out someone standing in the dark he almost calls out to it but Ozpin interrups

We need to leave I’m not sure where we are but I can tell she’s close

Do you mean sal-

Yes now can you stand

Oscar can tell he was afraid he didn’t even want to speak of her

Oscar attempts to stand but what he hears stops him dead

“No stay she says too”

The voice falters like someone not sure how to say a word they just learned or a shy child talking in front of people they don’t know

He looks to the figure it takes a step forward silently and comes into the light as soon as he sees it he recoils back remembering exactly what happened he stares at it his mind couldn’t come up with words to describe it but Ozpin knew exactly what to call it a monstrosity Oscar stared at the creature it had no eyes and so many teeth Oscar hadn’t had too many encounters with Grimm but he knew they did not talk was this someone’s semblance maybe emeralds trying to scare him where was he was he captured were the others all right his mind began to race with the possibility’s

Calm down you if that is a Grimm it may attack if you don’t control yourself and I don’t feel long memory on our belt

“Yes yes the cane where was it” Oscar thought he reached for his belt it wasn’t there he could feel the fear coming from Ozpin at that fact

“She will be here soon”

The voice emanating from the Grimms teeth saturated mouth spoke once again

Oscar could feel oz start to panic the fear of Salem was one they both shared

Oscar suddenly felt more calm when others panicked he always did manage to feel more at ease because if they were panicking too that means the threats real and he can do something about it so he decided to speak

“Where am I”

The Grimm stayed silent

He heard the creek of a door light shone throughout the room blinding Oscar he strained his eyes he recognized her by her figure alone and was relieved it was cinder

“Get up she wants to talk to you” her voice was cold but behind it he could feel the furry he shakily got up from the bed when he did he noticed his coat was gone and over his arm was a bandage that rapped several times around it “hurry up she doesn’t like to be kept waiting” Oscar shuffler tworads cinder keeping an eye on the Grimm he couldn’t decide who he was more afraid of the Grimm or cinder but he knew who probably would kill him if he turned his back and that was cinder so he decided to go with her

She led him down a long hall way decorated with black lamps so everything was so dim you couldn’t really see anything but all you could make out where figures and shadows but compared to the light of the room he was in before it was almost blinding his whole body hurt so maybe that was why his eyes hurt too his body telling him that whatever he did to end up in this much pain to never do it again and he got the message loud and clear they reach a set of double doors cinder opens them and he follows the room was beautiful in a strange sort of way it’s architecture looked natural and unnatural at the same time but what he was more concerned with was the woman siting at the end of the long table in the middle of the room cinder led him closer and closer he could almost hear the fear coming from Ozpin his desire to run away and hide grew by the second they were only a few feet from her now he could see her face clearly now and her expression took him back it wasn’t one anger or malice more like pitty cinder pulled out the chair next too Salem and said “sit” so he did he could hear cinder walk behind him and leave now alone with the woman he could feel his hands staring to shake he grabbed his left with his right to try to make them stop but for some reason he could not look away from her ozpin had gone silent now oscar could feel noting from him

“You don’t have to be afraid child”

Her voice was sweet it almost reminded him of the one his aunt would use when he was little and he was afraid

“I am not going to hurt you If you give me what I want”

“A-and what do you want”

“How do I use the lamp I know you know and please don’t try and lie”

Oscar stayed silent he knew she had the lamp but knowing and being told it by her are two very different things

“Your probably wondering what do you get out of this I’ll tell you I can separate you and ozma so that you can be your own person”

What she said can’t be true Ozpin said they were one now that there souls were bound together

“You seem suprised he might not of known that he can be separated from his host but he can he’s done it with the maidens so why couldn’t it be done with him right now he’s probably telling you I’m lying or that I’m tricking you but I’m not I am no lier”

“He hasn’t told me anything he’s quiet now”

She leans back in her throne “that doesn’t surprise me he always was a coward hiding in the body of a child doesn’t come as a surprise to me anymore tho It does break my heart that he would do that take someone’s whole life away”

“But he doesn’t get to choose”

“No he doesn’t but he does get to choose what to do once he’s bonded he could stay quiet and not ruin people’s lives but he chooses to do so and I’m sorry that he chose to do that to you my offer isn’t a lie I can separate you from him you could be free to live your life again I’ve been told you were a farmer with an aunt don’t you want to go back to her she must be worried did you tell her where you were going when you left leave a note perhaps”

“I-I left a note”

He doesn’t know why he told here that there was no point in telling her that but he for some reason felt so relaxed around her even tho he was scared moments before all the fear he feels is coming from oz

“Now that just isn’t fair is it she took care of you when your parents passed and you just left without even a goodbye”

“How did you know that”

“Oh watts knows a lot about computers and after we found out who you were I decided to have him do a little research find out who you were before Ozma”

Oscar could feel the fear returning if they knew he his aunt was they could find her have they hurt her maybe worse

“Did you did you hurt her”

“No we haven’t laid a finger on her but we have been watching her she’s struggling without you she’s getting up in years and can’t do a lot of the field work on her own if you were separated you could go back you could go back to growing food and living a simple life a happy life and I’ll even have someone take you there with enough lien to last a life time and we will never bother you again”

What happens if I refuse your offer

“I may have to use more drastic means than polite conversation”

Can I have some time to think

“Yes of course child”

Her voice dripped in sweetness he felt as tho it could be a front but desperately wanted it to be true he wanted her to be the Salem oz remembered the woman so fierce in combat she scared him at times but the same one who was so soft after the battle the one who held him as he wept for the old world after there second meeting the one who held there children in her arms with the brightest smile the woman who’s sass knew no limits and her love even less he felt the sadness from Ozpin and tears began to well up in his eyes he looked down at his hands away from her for the first time sense sitting down

“It’s ok if you want to cry child”

Oscar couldn’t hold the tears and let them fall holding back the sobs she places a hand on his shoulder he feels as though he should be afraid and pull alway but he doesn’t

“I understand it is hard having so much responsibility thrust upon you at such a young age it must be hard being away from everything you know on top of that”

Oscar not only couldn’t hold back the sobs but didn’t want too anymore the woman Ozpin had told him was the ultimate evil was patting him on the shoulder and telling him it’s ok the woman so many of his past lives had dreamt of holding in there arms the woman who was wronged by the gods for loving someone and not wanting to be alone this was the first time he had let himself cry in a long time

“I’m sorry the gods wronged you This way I know how it feels I promise you never asked for this”

I hate him too he didn’t let me say goodbye to her because she would try and stop us

“It’s ok let it out then we can talk more”

That’s the end it was supposed to be way longer but I lost half of it and honestly couldn’t be fucked to rewrite it all so sorry this was my first public work and honestly I know it’s not great just trying to toss an idea around that what if Salem is kind to Oscar when they meet

[pikachugirl1250]

So

I guess no one’s made a post with quotes from the amazing Sonic ‘06 dub so here’s my master post:

“Oh man, I hope somebody fucks up the fireworks.” *literally 3 seconds later, the entire place is being blown up*

“O N E!” *said by Sonic in front of Elise*

“We always miss the ice cream airship, Tails!”

“Hey Rouge, hey Rouge, hey Rouge, we found the computer room.” “Oh fuck the computer room! We can play so much Fortnite in here, dude!”

“So, this is the fabled Tilted Towers.” *the whole cast bursts in laughter*

“That’s what you get for unironically having 69 in your name!”

“Going through the floor. Who do you think you are, Danny Phantom or something?” “My shadow...that’s how I got my name!”

*Mephiles (I’m sorry, Memphis) comes out, violently coughing, then laughs menacingly* “Welcome to Tilted Towers. My name is Memphis Tennessee and I am part lizard.”

“In your future, it looks like you will kiss seven girls. How lucky for you.” “Joke’s on you, if you a true copy of me, you’d know I’m gay!”

*after the Iblis battle* “And then we ate it.”

“I’m not even gonna pretend you were talking about Fortnite. I just really love bringing up my favorite game whenever I can.”

“They don’t treat you like a friend, they treat you like an item.” *the cast starts to laugh hard* “Sometimes I wish I could be more than just an accessory...but unfortunately, as a gamer, I don’t get respect.” “I’m not a gamer, so maybe they’ll respect me!” “That just makes you a beta cuck.” *the cast chokes in laughter*

“OH! OH MY GAWD, SOMEONE HELP ME!” ... “I had to trap Sonic in the hell dimension cause he disrespected gamers.”

“PUBG’S OLD NEWS, EGGMAN! Tetris 99’s where it’s at!”

“Tell it to us in excruciating detail, Tails.” “Well, it was a whole dream— Bye!” “You knew that was coming, you asshole.” *said by Ryan*

“You’re heavy!”

*both Shadow and Rouge turn around quickly* “Sorry, I thought I heard a cat.”

“All around me are familiar Blazes, worn out Blazes, worn out Blaze— IS THAT WHAT A HOUSE LOOKS LIKE?”

“I am happy with myself. I have a Positive Mental Attitude!” “Gawd I wish that were me.”

*a butterfly lands on Sonic’s nose* “This is food, Elise.”

“YOU MUST NEVER RAP AGAIN, OR ELSE THE WORLD WILL BE DESTROYED!” “Have you even heard my mixtape? It’s fire!”

“Aw dammit, I missed my opportunity on Sonic’s next album!”

“You don’t make this fun cause you’re sad!” “I’m always sad!”

“EGGMAN I FUCKED YOUR WIIIIIIIIIIIIFE—“

“I flushed them down the terlet.”

“Listen, you got any weed on you?” “No, what are you the only one who smokes weed here, Knuckles? Except for maybe Rouge. Rouge?” “Speak for yourself, motherfucker!”

“That’s the last fucking time you confuse me with that blue asshole. You did it once before, you did it again. You did it at our wedding, Rouge.” “You just look so much alike!”

“You know, maybe things aren’t so bad. I’m here, I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts.” “Hey Silver.” “GAWDDAMMIT!”

“YOU HAD THE WEED THE WHOLE TIME?!” “YOU INTERRUPTED MY BROODING—“

“So, lemme get this straight. You’ve been dating...Sonic? The hedgehog? The blue one? Looks like this?” “I guess? If that’s my story arc, then yes!” *the cast snickers, then bursts into laughter as Amy examines Elise* “Yep, I can kill ya.”

“Wait, Sonic, which of us is the bride? Sonic! SONIC, I NEED AN ANSWER!”

“Go on, Shadow, don’t you support gay rights?”

“Here, do you want some weed?” “I do not have lungs, so I cannot smoke weed. But I will take it anyway, and put it directly into my brain cells. Here we go.” *Omega puts the weed into his chest cavity* “Downloading Weed.exe” “HOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT”

“I was actually meaning to ask you a question: Are you seeing anyone right now? Cause there’s no one sexier than myself.” *Memphis chuckles* “Why? Are you interested because, um, I was actually thinking you and I are pretty similar.” “Bruh, I wouldn’t be asking if I wasn’t interested.”

“If you die in the game, you die in real life, Shadow the Hedgehog.” “How did you know Sword Art Online was my favorite anime? You should have known that I had terrible taste.”

*I would put it in Omega’s confessions, but the bit is that he’s being ignored*

“Shadow, you are my greatest creation of all time from the battle royale, and now look at you.” “Wait, hold on. Are you my dad?” ... “Well, if you’re my daddy, it makes the last dub horrifying. Gawd.”

“Now I carry around my boyfriend wherever I desire.”

“I didn’t have fun at all. My eyeliner’s ruined, my arms hurt, I got kicked in the head. I hate everything, and I didn’t even know I could do that.”

“How many times are you gonna run? I’ve captured you 17 different times!” “I feel like it’s gonna be at least 18.” *long pause, with a faint wheeze, then hysterical laughter from the cast* “The caucasity of this bitch.”

“If someone hacked into my Fortnite account, I’m going to have a birth of cactuses out of my asshole.” “Currently being hacked.” *Eggman lets out a high pitched scream*

“Hm, the desert. Count how many sand is here, Omega. That’s your first mission.” *Omega slowly counts*

“Omega! Count the number of grains of sand in this room!” “Omega slowly counts again*

“You guys suck. Really, I can’t believe I used to date you. You used to be cool, dude.” “Have you met me? I was really cool.” “You’re sexy as fuck, but you’re also a dickhead.”

“Omega, count how many mouths he has!” “Okay.” *was about to count, but Shadow interrupts* “Yeah, exactly! You ain’t got no mouths, bitch!”

“Silver, you know what? You’re a twink. Imma go smoke some weed now.” “How long were you waiting to say that?” “The whole dub, baby!”

“Silver? I’m almost proud of you.” *gasp* “That’s the most proud of me you’ve ever been!”

“Elise. Guess what?” “What?” “I can never die!”

“Now I have all the colors of the rainbow, and I can unleash my true gay power!” *maniacally laughs* “Now everyone’s my boyfriend!”

“I think the power of friendship can bring him back. If we unite as friends.” “I. Will fucking. End you.”

“I remember this worked well when I was trying to summon Animal Crossing for Switch.”

“You guys wanna start a polyamorous marriage?” “Sure!”

“Didn’t you guys feel that? That breeze? It penetrated my heart.” “Sorry, that was me, I farted.”

[limjaeseven]

Sweet Revenge

Pairing: Seokjin X Reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Word Count: 7,868

Summary: When the boy who taught you to dream becomes the one who shatters them, you decide that the only way to win is to beat him at his own game. Will you succeed, or will you fall for his beautiful eyes again?

[a/n]: This fic was so much fun to write. A huge thank you to the team over at FicsWithLuv for putting this wonderful project together!

Kim Seokjin was the biggest singer in South Korea. His influence reached out all over the world making him one of the most loved music artists of all time. He was a multi millionaire entrepreneur with a restaurant chain of his own and a fasion brand. Everyone loved Kim Seokjin almost as much as they feared him. He had so much power that he could ruin absolutely anybody's career in a matter of seconds.

That last feature about his wasn't an add on to the fame though. He had been capable of doing that for years as he had done with many people in his life. The most important one of those was you.

You were an absolute nobody. No one knew your name other than the old man at the grocery store and the landlord of your dingy apartment in the suburbs of Seoul. You had no friends, no family, no one to love but one man to hate. Kim Seokjin had ruined your life because he felt like it and now here you were, living in a room the size of a closet and having to do odd jobs to earn enough for each meal.

You and Seokjin went way back, all the way to when you were both six year olds, in the town of Gwangjeon. You were an orphan living in the local orphanage and Seokjin was the son of a strawberry farmer. He was part of your play group that met each evening at the local park.

Seokjin was also your first love. With his flawless skin and his beautiful voice, you had been in love with him for as long as you could remember. He was a city boy trapped in the body of a village kid. He was meant to be up there with the big names and the famous people.

You on the other hand were a simple girl with simple dreams. Your biggest goal in life was to have a house of your own and be independent. That's all you wanted from life, but Seokjin felt otherwise. He saw the talent in you and called you to his house often to practice singing together on his second hand piano.

Seokjin's family had no money but they still bought a piano. People often wondered how that happened but the answer was simple. Seokjin had a charm that was absolutely unrefutable. If he wanted something, he got it. It only took half an hour of begging and a few tears for Seokjin's father to borrow some money from a friend and buy him the piano.

You wrote and composed songs for the both of you to sing all through your childhood. Every time you went to divide the parts to sing, Seokjin always picked the best parts, saying that the piano was his and so he should get dibs on picking parts.

Both of your voices melded beautifully as you sang, filling the room with a serene vibe. As time went along, you slowly started falling for the beautiful boy who taught you how to sing. You practiced hard day in and day out, learning to play the instrument flawlessly while singing at the same time.

A few years passed and you joined the theatre group of your school. You were loved by everyone there and were given lead roles in every production. You even helped write and produce musicals for your group that you performed at the local theatre.

Seokjin, who initially had no interest in theatre, joined the group a year after you did and stole your thunder in a matter on minutes. His good looks and charming personality overruled your hardworking, sincere one. That didn't make you hate Seokjin though, you could never hate Seokjin.

It was towards the end of your senior year in highschool when the call for auditions for a large record label was announced. Both of you were extremely excited and practiced even harder, staying up all night at Seokjin's house.

When the auditions rolled by, you were well prepared as a duo with Seokjin. You both cleared the local round and made it to first the district and then the national level audition.

It was the night of the final audition when everything went down hill. The company had announced the both of you as winners and were planning to launch you as a duo when the MC faultered. He was called to the side and when he returned, it was announced that there was only one winner, and that winner was Seokjin.

You were confused but still happy for your best friend. You congratulated him as he accepted the trophy and boquet but he pretend like he didn't know you. Standing there confused, one of the judges placed a hand on your shoulder and looked at you sympathetically.

"That boy was able to covince the judges that you wouldn't make it far and that it would be a better investment to sign just him. I tried to convince them otherwise but I couldn't, I'm sorry" He apologised. You froze as you processed what the man had just said. Seokjin wouldn't do that, he was your best friend.

You approached him to talk about it but he ignored you again and never spoke to you after that day. With the cash price he received, his family moved to the city, leaving you in the town all alone with your friends because Seokjin was the only friend you had ever had.

The only nice thing he did for you was he left his old piano for you. You sat next to it for days and contemplated before finally deciding to play it. You wrote many songs about the pain and anguish that you felt. But the true betreyal you felt was the day you went to the local bar for the first time.

That day happened to be the day Seokjin debuted and his entire album was being played on the radio. You didn't have a radio back in your orphanage and you hadn't touched one since Seokjin so the one at the bar was the first one you'd heard in almost a year.

As the title track started playing, your eyes snapped open. It was a familiar tune and the words also sounded like you had heard them before. Of course you knew the words because it was the first song you had ever written, Seokjin sitting by your side as you penned it down.

It was also the song you both planned to sing together if you two won but that obviously never happened. The credits for the song were mentioned at the end. "Lyrics by Kim Seokjin" The radio jockey said, leaving your heart even more shattered.

You don't remember how much you drank that night. Fortunately some random guy who probably wanted a good fuck agreed to pay for your bill. You ended up sleeping with him but the only thing you remembered from the whole incident was waking up in his bed the morning after. You quietly left and headed back to your orphanage and packed up everything you owned along with the little money you had saved up and left.

You moved to Seoul and had the piano shipped to you. It was well worth it even though it cost you two weeks worth of dinner. You were used to not having three meals a day because your orphanage wasn't well funded and they could barely afford two meals a day for all the kids.

And so, after all of that, here you were, auditioning at companies big and small trying to make it into the industry. You had given up singing the day Seokjin debuted and had turned to rap. It was a genre that spoke to you. It was all about the struggle and the hard work. You became quite famous in the underground rap scene in Seoul but it wasn't a source of stable income.

After finishing your forty fifth audition, you stepped out feeling defeated. As usual, they had immediately recognised you from your first audition and denied you immediately. Apparently Seokjin didn't want you to make it big and had threated all companies from signing you.

Heading home, you prepared for the underground event that you had that day. The crowd cheered loudly as you got on stage. You had prepared a couple of songs but last minute, you decide to swap out the last track. One thing that you were most well know for was your freestyle rap. Instead of rapping the last track as you had planned, you told the organisers to call for Jackson.

In-house beat boxing expert Jackson Wang was a constant at your underground rap society. He was a trainee at a big company and was to debut as an idol but his heart longed for the gritty hip-hop scene and so your society was his escape. You told Jackson to give you a plain beat and you started freestyling.

You poured your heart out about how much you truly hated Seokjin and how he not only ruined your life but also broke your heart. The beauty of rap was that you could do diss tracks but you could also rap about your feeling and your audience would relate to it at some level or the other.

"Sorry for the rather sad ending, I'm not having the greatest of days but thank you so much for being a wonderful audience" You said before dropping your mic on the stage. It was a bit of a signature move for you at this point because you were the undefeated rap battle champion in your society and it was customary to drop the mic everyone you won a battle.

"Y/n, someone's here to talk to you" Mark, the head organiser said. You told him to let the person inside your makeshift green room. The whole setup of your rap scene was rather haphazard due to the lack of funds. You were the only artist with a private room as you were the most prominent of the performers.

"Good evening, I'm Lim Jaebum" The man introduced himself. He was dressed in a black suit with the 'GG' Gucci print all over and the two snakes on the back. Accompanying the outfit, he wore a two silver loops on each ear and fur lined Gucci loafers. Hip-hop culture included a lot of high end brands so you were good at spotting luxury clothing.

"Y/n y/l/n but you probably know me as Rani" You introduced yourself. Rani meant queen in Hindi and you picked the word for a simple reason–you wanted to show the world that you could be a queen without a man. It was your subtle way of hiding the scar that Seokjin left on your heart.

"Well, it's nice to meet you, y/n. I'm going to get to business right away. I have come with a proposal for you. I want you to work for me, as a professional rapper. I have a small studio in Seoul but I'm upgrading to a new building and I'll have a whole team dedicated to you" Jaebum said.

"And why are you picking me?" You asked, suspicious of the too-good-to-be-true offer. You were in no mood to be cheated by someone, you barely had enough money to survive.

"You see, I was close friends with a man named Bang Sihyuk a few years ago and we started a label together. After Kim Seokjin joined the label though, he was able to convince the company that they didn't need me because he wanted to be known as the person who made Seokjin the star he is. So I was fired from my own company. I know that you were friends with Seokjin, I'm the one who apologised to you that day for what happened. I want to use this opportunity to give both of us a second chance" Jaebum said.

You sat in silence for a moment, taking in everything that Jaebum had said. You had blocked out all memories from that fateful day so you weren't surprised you didn't recognize him. Weighing his proposition carefully, you asked him for a few days to come up with your answer and he gave you his card before leaving.

You didn't sleep well that night. Your eyes kept wandering back to Jaebum's card. In the end you caved in and called him, telling him that you had agreed to his offer. He called you to his studio the next day and you agreed.

Over the course of the next couple of months, month, you and Jaebum worked on your first album. He helped you produce some of the music while also working on the concept and the business side of things. You upgraded to a new building that was right next to the BigHit building, which was Seokjin's label.

Finally, six months after you met Jaebum, you debuted under Lunar Music as a solo rapper. You wanted to keep your stage name as Rani and Jaebum agreed. Your album sold out in no time and Korean news was talking about your comeback for days.

Old videos of your audition with Seokjin were brought up now and then but they were quickly blocked by you assume Seokjin or BigHit. People wanted to know about Korea's biggest star's ex best friend and interviewers always asked you about him. You politely told them that you both were acquaintances as you grew up in the same town but grew distant after he won the audition.

People also saw you as someone who was betrayed by the judges of the audition as you were first announced as the winner before they changed the verdict. All of that combined with your soulful and meaningful music led to you becoming the most popular female soloist in Korea over the course of a few months.

As your popularity grew, more and more people wanted to see you collaborate with Seokjin. They shipped you two together and wanted to see you two perform together. Whenever you were asked if you wanted to collaborate with him, you usually tried the best to change the topic and so did Seokjin.

Seokjin was sitting on the sidelines, watching your popularity grow. He was surprised to see you make it big in the industry, not that he doubted your talent but after all that had happened, he didn't expect you to comeback to music.

Avoiding Seokjin was hard, especially as you both became the top male and female artists respectively in Korea. You did your best though, and Jaebum helped a lot too. He made sure your paths crossed as rarely as possible.

So when he called one day and asked you to meet him in his office, you knew the news was not going to be good. You finished practice quickly and finished up whatever work you had before heading to the top floor.

"You need to perform with Seokjin. There is a charity ball coming up and getting called as the main act is a huge deal. It's one of the most exclusive events in the country. I tried negotiating with them and so did BigHit but the organisers are adamant that you two must perform together" Jaebum explained. You sat quietly in front of him for a few minutes before replying.

"I'll do it. If you say it's that important, I'm sure it is and I'm not going to let that idiot ruin it for me. Just make sure that it fits into our schedule. I'm not compromising on my practice for this event. Comeback season is soon approaching, Jaebum" You saw your best friend visibly relax as the words left your lips.

Two days later, you met the organisers at the venue and finalised everything. You ended up hiring a dance studio due to the fight that broke about between Jaebum and Bang Sihyuk on which company's dance studio should be used for practice. After long conversations with Seokjin's producer, you finalised the medley that you were going to perform.

The day of your first practice, you arrived a few minutes early. You set up the music and started doing stretches. You were bending down to touch your toes when you heard someone whistle behind you. Turning around, you saw Seokjin leaning against the door frame with a smug smile on his face.

"You really cleaned up well, didn't you? No one would guess that you were an orphan from a small town in the middle of nowhere" You scoffed as you finished stretching. It felt as if Seokjin had taken it upon himself to irritate you from the very beginning.

"I may have but it looks like you haven't. Apparently fame and money doesn't teach one manners. You're just as crude as all those years ago" Seokjin pushed himself off the door frame and turned the speaker on and listened to the draft track that you two were to perform.

"It needs something intimate. The dance needs to be sexy, almost erotic" Seokjin noted and you didn't want to, but you had to admit. The medley was slow and powerful so a sexy dance would compliment it well.

"If that's a way to get into my pants, you should know it's not going to work" You replied and Seokjin placed a hand on his chest, looking fake scandalised. You started working on the choreography once you were done making jabs at each other.

Within the next two days, the choreography was ready and you both started practicing vocals. The medley had Seokjin singing and you rapping over him and so it needed a lot of practice with both of you present, much to your dismay.

"Something is missing. Couldn't you come up with a good medley at least on your own?" Seokjin complained. You rolled your eyes at him as you replayed the track from the beginning.

"At least I make my own music. Your producer does everything for you. He approved this and so you should just accept it. He made your career" You retorted and Seokjin chuckled.

"I made my own career, love. Pdogg hyung is just helping by giving me music to sing. I would have been famous with just my gorgeous looks" He was seriously getting on your nerves. His comment made you think back to all the nights you and Jaebum spent together putting your first album together. You were so grateful for his help. You couldn't believe that Seokjin had become this spoilt.

The Seokjin you knew was a humble boy with big dreams. He wasn't this overconfident, arrogant man that sat in front of you. You were somewhere glad that you had come all the way here the hard way as it kept you grounded.

Dance practices with him were the worst. It involved his hands on your body a lot and Seokjin didn't pass a single chance to whisper snarky comments in your ears. You were so happy the day of the last rehearsal before the event that you took Jaebum out for drinks even though you hate drinking.

The night of the fundraiser you were getting dressed backstage when Seokjin barged into your room. You screamed in shock as you covered yourself up with a towel nearby. You were in just your underwear, about to slip on your dress for the night.

"Get out!" You shouted at Seokjin but he just stood there, staring at your body. You saw his eyes wander to the scars on your legs and the scratches all over your body. Living on streets did that to you. It was cruel world that you used to live in before Jaebum saved you.

"Are you okay? I heard you scream" Jaebum asked as he stepped into the room and saw what was going on. He quickly stood in front of you, blocking you from Seokjin.

"I thought she asked you to get out" He said in a firm tone and Seokjin finally got the message and left. Jaebum promptly closed the door and stood outside it to make sure no one came in. When you were finally done, you called him inside.

"I'm so sorry that happened. I'll need get you some personal security or something to make sure that doesn't happen again" Jaebum ranted and you placed a finger on his lips. He looked down at you in shock as you smiled at him.

"It's okay, Jaebum. It wasn't your fault. I think the lock on the door isn't working, just get the people here to fix it" You comforted him before calling your makeup artist and hairstylist in to finish your look. Jaebum stood next to you the whole time, ashamed that he had allowed something like this to happen under his watch.

"You are on in five" The stage hand let you know and you grabbed your in ears and mic and stood in your position. Seokjin and you would be entering from opposite sides of the stage and so you were glad you didn't need to see his face before getting on.

The MC announced your performance and the lights dimmed in the auditorium. The soft R&B music flowed from the speakers and you stepped onto the stage. Seokjin started off by humming a bit of the melody before starting his verse. You waited for your cue to start rapping and in the mean time concentrated on getting the choreo right.

You had decided on a bit of an unconventional choreo. Both of you agreed that it needed to be sensual but you decided to make it a little different. You were dressed in a black suit and Seokjin was wearing a flowy white shirt that showed off his collarbones, black leather pants and white high heels. It was a sort of role reversal choreography.

Seokjin sang his lines in a high pitch and used his falsetto liberally while you rapped in a low harsh tone, the two sounds complimenting each other. Convincing him to do this was hard but you really wanted to make an impact. Breaking stereotypes was something you loved to do and after a few conversations, you were able to convince him.

You expect that after your performance, you'd get backlash for the unconventionality but the Korean media loved it and called you the idols of the new decade. This only cause you both to get paired up more by the public. One thing they all noticed was your undeniable chemistry.

Seokjin and you had both started off together and your most loved quality even as aspiring musicians was your chemistry. Being childhood friends made you both inseparable. Some of that was still left somewhere and could be seen on stage when you performed together.

Event after event that came up forced you two to perform together and you just couldn't deny them because of how important they were to your career. Even Jaebum was getting annoyed with how much you had to perform with Seokjin. You comforted him saying that it was your choice.

Since the day of the fundraiser though, Seokjin was a lot nicer to you. He was much more gentle and tried not to pass comments about your time after the audition and before your debut when you were on the streets. You appreciated his effort and tried to be less snarky as well.

Your comeback was coming up and so the performances with Seokjin took a backseat as you were busy promoting your album. Even though you were excited that you were ready to release your new album, something felt missing. You spent your days smiling for the camera and wondering about what was wrong. You finally got fed up when you couldn't come up with an answer and took Jaebum out for drinks to clear your mind.

"I feel like something is missing, Jae. It's been bothering me quite a bit. I can't concentrate on anything" You confessed to him. Jaebum looked confuse but he kept quiet for a moment before something clicked.

"You're missing Seokjin, aren't you?" He teased. Your immediate response was to deny the allegation made against you. You chugged the remainder of your drink before slamming it onto the bar.

"Of course not. Why in the world would I miss that idiot?" Jaebum sighed as he closed his eyes and proceeded to chuckle, leaving you confused. You weren't drunk, a bit tipsy but not drunk. You wondered what Jaebum was laughing at when he spoke.

"I thought I had a chance but it looks like he still had your heart. You can deny it as much as you want but you'll see" He said before getting up and taking you home. You kept quiet during the entire car ride contemplating what Jaebum had said.

"You had a chance? Wait a minute, do you like me, Jae?" You said as he opened the door to your apartment and guided you inside. He smiled at you sheepishly and scratched his neck.

"I do but I didn't try anything because I knew you saw me as an older brother or best friend. Now that I know that you still like Seokjin, I won't do anything I promise. I've learned to cherish you as my best friend and co-worker for so long, I'm okay doing it for the rest of however long we know each other" Jaebum said. At that moment you were incredibly grateful to have a friend like him. He saved you from your old life and gave all of this to you and cared about you so much. You gave him a tight hug before bidding him goodbye.

The more you thought about what Jaebum, the more you realised the truth in what he had said. You had developed a soft spot for Seokjin. Ever since the fundraiser incident and him becoming nicer to you, you saw hints of your old best friend show through the arrogant mask that was Seokjin's superstar personality.

Deep down both you and Jaebum knew that you still loved him. He was your first love after all. He had carved a soft spot for himself in your heart all those years ago. You were still struggling to come to terms with the fact that you still cared about him but it was true and you knew that.

You checked your schedule out of boredom. Album promotions were almost over and you were restless. You wanted to know what was up next. The previous day when you checked the calendar that you and Jaebum shared it only showed comeback performances. You scrolled to the bottom of the page to find a new addition.

It was a show scheduled a week after the end of your promotion period with a little note attached saying 'you can thank me later'. You were confused but when you rechecked the entry you realised it said 'show with Seokjin'. Jaebum truly was the greatest friend you could ever ask for.

It was finally the day of the practice for the upcoming show after you were done with your comeback. You were super excited to finally meet Seokjin again though you tried not to show it. You went to a convenience store on your way to grab some stuff for both of you to eat between practice. You spotted some of Seokjin's favourite candy and bought it. He hated to admit it but he had quite the sweet tooth.

You reached the studio and dropped the food in the corner before heading to the washroom to take your makeup becausese you hated dancing with it on. When you returned, you were about to open the door to the practice room when you noticed that it was ajar. You thought that Seokjin would have come in and would have forgotten to lock the door but then you heard a weird sound coming from inside.

It was the sound of kissing and you peeked through the crack of the open door to see Seokjin passionately kissing a woman that you recognised as his assistant. You stood their in shock as you saw them devour each others face. When you finally came back to your senses, you barged into the room as if nothing had happened.

Seokjin's assistant immediately got off of him and slipped out of the room. You walked over to the bag of food and looked down at it in disgust. Your naïve heart had fallen for him but had forgotten to consider if he even liked you in the first place. Seokjin saw you staring at the bar and walked over.

"This all of my favourite stuff, did you buy it for me?" He asks, his voice laced with surprise. You felt the tears building up in your eyes and willed them to stop. You weren't going to look weak in front of Seokjin.

"No I didn't, they are for Jaebum" You hissed at him before picking up a bottle of water from it and chugging half of it. You moved to the speaker to start playing the music when Seokjin spoke.

"That CEO of yours? He looks like a love sick puppy whenever he's around you. Did you sleep with him to get him to sign you? Because honestly it always feels he cares more about you than your talent" Seokjin gritted, his voice full of venom. You were taken aback for a second before the anger creeped up.

"Dare you say a word against that man. He saved me from my life on the streets where I worked five jobs just to pay rent. Most days I didn't know if I had enough money to buy food. He fixed what you broke. He is a true friend, better than you ever were" You shouted before grabbing your coat and bag and storming out of the studio.

You drove down to Jaebum's house and knocked the door impatiently. When he opened the door he was shocked to see you standing there. He was about to ask you about the practice but you raised your hand, signalling him not to.

Walking into his house, you went to the kitchen and dropped the bag of food on the counter before heading to the fridge. You grabbed two bottles of beer and a bottle of soju. Using the opener on his fridge, you opened the beer and chugged the whole thing in one go. Jaebum stared at you in disbelief as he watched you down the bitter liquid.

You passed the other beer to him before grabbing two shot glasses and pouring soju into both. You held one of his hands open and forced him to clink glasses with you before you downed it. You were about to down a second shot when Jaebum came to his senses and grabbed your hand.

"What's going on?" He asked, worried. You just stared him in the eye for a silent minute before crashing your lips into his. He stood their, shocked as you tried to kiss him. You tried to tongue at his lips but they stayed in a seam. The alcohol was getting to your head. You finally got angry due to a lack of response and pulled yourself away from him.

"Kiss me, Jaebum" You said but he pushed you away. You looked at him, confused and saw the pain in his eyes. Regret instantly filled you as you realised what you were doing. You were trying to take advantage of his crush on you and breaking his heart in the process. You kneeled on the floor as you felt your world crumbling and sobbed harshly, tears rolling down your cheeks.

Jaebum knelt down next to you and pulled you into a tight hug, making you cry harder. You felt like the worst friend in the whole world. Because of you, not only was his reputation being tarnished, you were hurting him too. He let your cry into his shoulder for what felt like hours before guiding you to his bedroom and laying you down on his bed.

"Tell me what happened, y/n" Jaebum said and you finally had the guts to look him in the eyes. You took a few deep breaths to calm yourself down before speaking.

"I went grocery shopping before practice today thinking I'd surprise Seokjin with his favourite stuff because after what you told me, I realised you were right. But what I didn't expect was to walk in on him making out with his assistant. When I went to leave, he asked if I had to sleep with you to get you to sign me because you like me and I was so angry that he said something like that against you. I'm sorry, Jaebum. Sorry for being the worst friend ever, for letting him talk shit about you and for hurting you. If you don't want to see me ever again, I'll just leave" You said between all the tears.

"Y/n, listen to me. First of all, I don't think he said all that to put me down. He did it to make you feel bad. Honestly I don't give a fuck about what that idiot has to say about me. I am hurt that you tried to get me to kiss you knowing that I'm weak for you but it's okay. I know what you are going through is hard and you need to let it out. I was an idiot and didn't realise that he could be dating someone and told you all that nonsense. You're not the bad friend here, it's me who hurt you. You're the most amazing friend I could have ever asked for, don't forget that" Jaebum comforted you.

You ended up sleeping over at Jaebum's place that night. You had fallen asleep after all of the drama the night before in Jaebum's bed and so he slept in the guest bedroom. When you woke up the next morning, you say a plate and a note on the bedside table. Jaebum had made breakfast for you and apologised for being able to be home to comfort you because he had an urgent meeting.

You went back home and took a long shower. You tried your best not to think about Seokjin and instead thought about to concepts for your next album. It was ironic how you were now back to square one with Seokjin. You didn't want to look at his face for a while but you somewhere deep down you knew that your heart still craved his attention.

The practice sessions became more cold after the whole ordeal. You walked in just in time and walked out the moment you were done. Seokjin was confused at your change in attitude but at least refrained from commenting about it. Once the performance happened, you told Jaebum to not book any shows with him for a while.

The problem was, even though you weren't seeing Seokjin anymore, you still though about him, a lot. The songs you wrote went from harsh and dark to sappy and lovesick. Your songs were all about your friendship with him and the love that you still have for him. You didn't your leave your studio for days trying to write something that wasn't about and failed miserably. In the end Jaebum had to drag you out of there to get you to eat.

Shows during this time also refused to let you perform without Seokjin. BigHit pressured your company to work with him to get them shows as well. Even though both of you were huge acts on your own, the Korean public wanted you in the same way you started, as a duo. All of this made you more frustrated resulting in you not getting enough sleep and not eating properly.

Day five of sitting in your studio without getting out you heard a knock on the door. You groaned expecting it to be Jaebum about to lecture you to get out and get some sunlight. You shouted for him to go away but the knocking continued. Cursing under your breath you pushed away from your table and opened the door.

There stood Seokjin in all his glory looking shocked at your state. You were at least a few kilos skinnier than he last saw you, dark circles prominent under your eyes and your haired mused. Your eyes widened as you realised it wasn't Jaebum who had come to meet you but Seokjin. In your panicked state, you tried to slam the door of your studio shut but Seokjin was able to slip a foot between the door and the frame, keeping it from closing.

"Wait, y/n. I need to talk to you" Seokjin said as you sit back in your chair and out your headphones on. He finds a chair and sits next to you and stares at your face. You tried hard not to look at him but he yanked your earphones away and forced you to look at him.

"Why are you doing this to yourself? Jaebum called me and told me that you hadn't gotten out of your studio in days. Are you planning to starve yourself to death?" He ranted angrily. You scoffed and folded your hands, narrowing your eyes.

"When did the Kim Seokjin start caring about a mere mortal soul like mine?" You muttered and saw Seokjin's eyes soften. It was one of the few times you caught a glimpse of the Seokjin you fell in love with all those years ago, your Jinnie.

"I always cared about you y/n" He said.

"Then why did you ask them to change the result? Why did you let me live on the streets? Why did you leave me alone and chase success? I thought we were a team, Seokjin. I was there for you all along and at the last moment you ditched me and took the spotlight for yourself, leaving me behind for the world" You gritted and Seokjin's eyes watered. He looked down at the ground as wipes his eyes before looking back at you.

"There's a lot from that day that you don't know, y/n?" He stuttered. Seokjin, for the first time since you knew him, look scared. He looked like he was terrified for the truth and of telling you what happened. You gulped but stayed quiet, waiting for him to continue.

"I still remember the first time we met, when we were six. You wore an old blue dress with no shoes and your hair tied in a messy ponytail. You were so captivating even back then. I had heard you sing to the small kids at the orphanage when you were eight and fell in love with your voice. That's why I dragged you to play the piano with me. I was jealous of your talent too and so I picked the nice parts and you still managed to sing better than me. Over the years we were friends I realised I was slowly falling for you.

Fast forward to the auditions and we reached the finals. Just before the results were announced, I went backstage to use the washroom when I overheard a conversation between one of the executive producers and Bang PDnim. Sihyuk found you attractive and said some horrible things about what he wanted to do to you and I was terrified. That's when I barged in and asked them to change the result to just me.

He fell for the argument that you would be bad for the company and that I was the better bet and he changed the results. I wanted to explain things to you but by the time I was done you were gone. I tried contacting you but to no avail. I left the piano back on purpose so that you could use it and one day make it on your own. If anyone had a better chance at being a singer it was you.

Somewhere along the way I started to believe myself that I was better. That's why I didn't think twice before including your song on my album. I was an idiot and asshole for doing that but the fame was getting to me. I still loved you somewhere deep down in my heart and even though I put that song in there for myself, I thought of you every time I heard it.

That's why I was so happy to see you come back with a vengeance. I knew that the whole situation would make you hate me but I knew you were stubborn and would shine brighter than I ever could. But what changed everything was the day I saw all those scars. I knew life would be tough for you once I left but I didn't expect to see all of that. I couldn't help but hate myself for being the one to cause you not only emotional hurt but also physical pain.

It may still not make sense why I cared for you more than me loving your voice but you meant more to me than you might ever know. You accepted me for myself. I was popular cause I got people what they wanted. No one cares about the real Seokjin. But you, you listened, you helped and you smiled. Your smile made my day back then and still does. You carved a space for yourself in my heart and it still exists.

I know I've been the world's worst friend and this is probably the worst way to confess my undying love for you but I don't think there is going to be a better opportunity to explain it all to you. I know it's a lot, so take your time with it. Also Jaebum told be about you walking in on me and Hwasa and how you were mad about it. That girl had been trying to get in my pants for a while and she had the audacity to kiss me. I fired her that day itself. It wasn't just you who had been waiting for practice that day, y/n" Seokjin said.

He placed a bag on your table before giving you a soft smile and stepping out of the studio. You sat there, overwhelmed by everything Seokjin had just said. You opened the bag to distract yourself and inside was some jajangmyeon, which happened to be your favourite along with a small note that read 'call me'. You were absolutely starving and hastily devoured the food.

A couple of hours later Jaebum came in to check on you. Seeing the empty containers of food and you sprawled over the couch in the studio made him smile. He walked over to you and you looked up at him, your eyes watering. He immediately sensed something was wrong and crouched down next to you.

"Should I have not called Seokjin? Do you need me to beat his ass up?" Jaebum asked but you shook your head. You placed a finger on your lips, asking him for a little bit of silence and he complied but didn't leave your side. He instead pet your head gently, just how you liked it when you were upset.

"He said a lot of things that I'm mad he didn't tell me earlier. He saved me and I hated him for it. I still love him and I want to start over but I'm scared to lose him again, Jae. What should I do?" You questioned. Jaebum leaned over and picked up the note he had seen on your table and stuck the post-it to his forehead before cupping his hands under his chin in a flower-cup motion. Jaebum hated doing ageyo but he would do anything for you.

The words 'call me' lingered in the back of your mind but it took you two days to finally have the courage to call him. You waited impatiently for him to pick up the call and he didn't disappoint you. He picked up the call after the second ring.

"Hey" He said and a small smile grew on your face as you heard the nervousness in his voice that mirrored your own. You took a deep breath before replying.

"Hey, can we meet?" You asked and Seokjin immediately agreed, asking you to meet him at a local café that evening.

You arrived ten minutes early as the nerves were getting to you and you just couldn't sit at home. You asked for a glass of water as you rehearsed what you were going to say to him. You totally did not call Jaebum at the last moment and recite your confession to him. You were a little guilty for doing that but Jaebum assured you that it was okay.

When Seokjin finally entered the café, he found you sitting at the back, scrolling through your phone. You hadn't noticed him to he took the opportunity to order some drinks and proceeded to sit in front of you at your table. You looked up at him from your phone and smiled nervously as he sat down.

"Do you want to order some-" You were cut off by the waitress bringing an iced americano and a peach ice tea to the table. He remembered your favourite drink and ordered it for you. You were a little surprised but you just smiled as you sipped your tea.

"So, you wanted to talk?" Seokjin prompted. He knew you well to the point where he remembered how you were really bad at initiating conversations about things you didn't really want to talk about. Your cheeks warmed as you processed his gesture and nodded.

"I like you too, Seokjin. And I want to give us a try if you want to" You mumbled. There was a beat of silence before a mix of joy and disbelief bloomed on Seokjin's face. He looked in your eyes for even a trace of humour but found none.

"Are you serious?" He asked, absolutely dumbfounded at your confession. He had completely prepared himself, thinking that you were going to tell him that you never wanted to see his face again. You just smiled and nodded.

"There are a lot of things we need to catch up on and I still haven't forgiven you for everything but I like you, a lot, and I really want to give us a shot" You said, now more confident.

Seokjin could barely process what was going on and so he got up and pulled you into a tight hug, muttering promises about being better. When he finally let go of you, he saw a genuine smile on your face that he hadn't seen in years. He dragged you out of the café before cupping your cheeks with both his hands and pulling you towards him.

The kiss was soft and chaste but the electricity flowing through your veins was undeniable. You pulled away before intertwining your fingers with his and placing a kiss on the back of his hand. You had found love once again and somehow it was still the same as all those years back, broken yet perfect.

[greyaceupyoursleeve]

Off Limits | Namjoon x reader one shot

“I was gone for what, 20 minutes?” “15.” “Okay, 15. He managed to cheer you up in 15 minutes?”

Fluff, humour, slice of life, comfort; 3k words

Summary: Namjoon goes to kiss reader (Yoongi’s cousin, off limits for him) - finds her upset - fluff - Yoongi finds out - awkward lunch follows.

The moment the main door bangs shut, Namjoon shoots up from his table to poke his head outside his dorm. All clear. He tip-toes across the hall and stands at the threshold of Yoongi’s room, peering inside. There’s pin-drop silence in the apartment as he’s trying to sneak up on you, to steal that kiss he would have had yesterday. The thing is, everyone knows that there’s a thing between you and Namjoon but since Yoongi declared you, his cousin, off-limits, you only exchange moony smiles, winks and flirt off-handedly on the rare occasions you meet.  

Stealthily, Namjoon pushes the door ajar, and stands in the doorway with a big cute-ass smile on his face, expecting you to notice him. But you just lie in the middle of Yoongi’s bed, limp, facing the ceiling, disconnected from reality.

For the umpteenth time, your mom had called you up and given you flak for spending more time at the theatre than studying for that degree you hardly cared about. You had got into college only so your parents would quit bickering. The fact that you are an adult now with full control over your life did not stop them from saying discouraging things to you, every now and then; and no matter how strong you made yourself, they always made you cry angrily.

“Can you not see what is better for you? Not everybody gets as lucky as your cousin.”

“Ma… I don’t have the energy to do this again.”

“I wish you’d stop being selfish. We raised you up after all.”

“I’ll just go, ok? I can’t… keep… doing this. Bye.”

You tossed your phone on the far side of the bed and crumbled on it, and felt the hot tears coming out. This was why you were staying with Yoongi and not at home for your break. Today you were going to head out with Yoongi to get lunch, who had witnessed the whole call from the edge of the bed.

“Will you get take out, please? I’m sorry… just let me… cry for a bit.” you whined as your eyes clogged with angry tears and your chest became tight.

“It’s okay, (y/n).” He gave a reassuring smile and rubbed your knee. ”I’ll get ice-cream.”

Normally, he wouldn’t leave you all alone with Namjoon, not after seeing you two huddled together in the balcony at 1 am last night. But it was getting past lunch-time. He grabbed the keys and his wallet and walked out. “Be back before you know it.” Seeing Namjoon’s closed door, he thought, nothing will happen—she’s crying and I’ll be back quickly. He felt sadistic, but on his part, the boy didn’t think you and Namjoon would go anywhere; and he didn’t want both of you to deal with that kind of heartbreak.

You sigh with your eyes closed, and picture calming things—a calm beach, cherry blossoms, a hillside lodge, your childhood. Your personal reel gets cut off when you feel the weight on the bed shift and open your eyes to see the boy next door. “What’s up, babe?”

He’s crouching on all fours over you, face-to-face. You turn your face to your right, covering your face to wipe your eyes. The sly smile on his face becomes a frown when he notices the streaks of tears. He lowers himself on his elbows to brush aside some stray hair with one hand and wipe your cheek with the other. “What’s wrong?” he whispers, inches from your face. You shuffle, trying to catch your breath as he shushs you.

“Has Yoongi… ever, um… told you about stuff at home?... My home?”

“He said something about you fighting your own battles the last time you came. And asked me to, uh, stay away.”

You snort. He snorts. He presses his face against your neck and nuzzles you with his nose. “Mom called… disappointed… wants me to study and... all that jazz.” You force the words out through your clenched jaws. Namjoon’s appearance has washed away some of your tension already, and you feel your heart rate recede from thumping like mad. Wait, wasn’t it supposed to be the opposite when someone you like comes into the picture?

“(y/n)… you keep up the hustle.” He says, in his comforting, deep voice, looking straight in your eyes, “As that boy group had put so profoundly, “I know what I am, I know what I want,” he raps softly in your ear.

“Never gon’ change, never gon’ trade. Yeah.” You giggle and nod. He gets more comfortable on the bed by stretching out and straddling you, pulling your head into his chest as you both lay on your sides. His hands trace soothing circles on the back of your neck.  You wrap your free arm around his waist and crane your head up to get a look at this soft boy. He leaves a peck on your forehead, and then slides down to your eye-level. “Stay strong, (y/n). You know how badly you want your dream job.” You break eye contact but he delicately makes you look back. “It’s okay; you’ll prove them wrong when you get through. I believe in you. Yoongi believes in you. Hell, we all do. You know that!”

“I will.” You nod with sincerity and snuggle into his warm chest again. “Thanks.” You lay entwined in silence as the clock sweeps three long albeit peaceful minutes.

“Hey, when will Yoongi return?” Namjoon asks. You sigh.

“I don’t know, a few more minutes?”

“That bastard.”

***********************************************************

This is unexpected. We have the entire apartment to ourselves and, in my head, I was going to rush to (y/n), pin her against the wall (gently) and redeem that kiss we missed last night, which I have been craving ever since I first saw her. But here we are, cuddled up. Over the last few minutes, her heart rate has come down radically, her shoulders have become less stiff, and she’s breathing easy. She’s not crying anymore either, and I think I am the reason. I grin. As much as I would like to make out with her right now, I don’t want to ruin this moment. She needs support; but who knows when I will be alone with her like this? I push that thought aside and focus on massaging on her shoulders. She seems to like it.

(y/n) raises herself on her elbows and faces me. “Remember, you were going to kiss me last night?” she tilts her head and asks coyly. The mischief in her eyes makes me forget how speech works.

“Please don’t say no, that would be awkward.” Her lower lip twitches as she says this and she bites it. I know that it’s natural but, fuck, it gets me going everytime.  My throat goes “uhhhuhhh” and I nod my head like a puppy. Shall I say something or just kiss her?

Just then, she gets up and slides off the bed. I try to reach her arm but she’s too swift. Without looking back, she heads into the bathroom and locks it behind her. I sit up on Yoongi’s bed, dazed. Was I too slow? 

The sound of water running in the sink replaces the silence. I get off the bed, and wait for her to come out. Shit, did I screw this up?

When she comes out after a minute that felt like eternity, her face looks fresher. “(y/n),” What am I planning to say? I follow her as she heads into the kitchen without looking at me again. 

She downs a glass full of water, then another. I stand in the doorway; not going to let her go this time. She puts down the glass, walks to me with a shy smile and drags me out of the kitchen by my hand. I tug along like a balloon, feeling lighter than air. I wasn’t this nervous last night.

“I didn’t want to kiss you with tears on my face.”

My panic disappears.

I pull her face to meet my lips. Her eyes flutter shut, as do mine, reveling in the sensation as my heart picks up pace. She wrings my t-shirt collar, withdrawing to catch her breath and resting my forehead on hers. With fingers in each other’s hair, it feels electric to meet her eyes.

She parts her lips to kiss me again, a smile ghosting across her features when a key turns in the lock.

Dammit, Yoongi.

*****************************************************************

He walks in with take-out boxes to find me on the couch in the hall. I take some boxes from him and smile. Can he smell Namjoon on me? I remember him smelling clean, nothing in particular. My whole face must look mushy right now, so I avoid looking directly at him and make conversation instead. To compensate for the raised pitch of my voice, I look for the ice-cream, sure that he got my favourite flavour. “Ahhh, black currant! Yoongi, I love you!” dragging the vowel sounds.

“Feeling much better, huh? Where’s,” he turns his head to Namjoon’s room, “Namjoon?”

“Yeah, I had a moment of  *dramatic pause* epiphany. Joon’s in his room?” I reply, emphasising the rhyme. I just happen to say stuff like this.

Yoongi pokes his head into Namjoon’s room and announces, “Lunch’s here, Joon.”

“Coming.”

Yoongi goes to his own room, and returns with his jacket off.

Meanwhile, I get the cutlery from the kitchen (less plastic, folks) and take in the aroma of the food. This food would be a great cover because, boy, do I get high on good food. It was almost good enough to stop my thoughts from lingering on the kiss. Almost.

“Alright, what do we have?” Namjoon makes a big show of acting nonchalant, but the loudness in his voice says otherwise. Yoongi shoots him a look. Namjoon joins us on the floor, as we dig into our food on the table. Yoongi across from me, Namjoon on the side between Yoongi and I.

It’s awkward, alright? First, there’s Namjoon and I, pretending like we weren’t necking each other a few minutes ago. Then there’s Yoongi, whose gaze moves between me and Namjoon like he can sense something. He looks like a surveillance camera. It’s possible that he smells one of us on the other. I washed my hair today.

After the boxes are opened and just as I wish for this to just end, Yoongi breaks the silence. “Namjoon, what were you upto?”

“Uh, I was in the room. Reading.” His voice cracks.

“And your phone was there, too, right?”

“Yeah… of course.” Pretty boy’s voice cannot hide the nerves and his head bobs unsteadily.

“Yeah, noticed it on your table… I called you twice but you never picked up.” Yoongi continues. Is he taking a shot?

“Really?” Namjoon kind of chokes on the dumpling.

“Yeah. I wanted to ask what you wanted. Forgot before I left, you know. You didn’t see it?” Yoongi studies Namjoon. Yoongi looks like a cat sharpening its claws now. Namjoon bites his lip as his cheeks redden slightly. Boy, no, don’t do that.

“Wow, these dumplings are... something else! Thanks oppa. You’re the best oppa.” I blow a kiss at Yoongi. He eyes me with suspicion.

“You had an epiphany, right? What was it?” Okay, we’re getting straight to the point.

“It’s pretty mediocre…”

“Still wanna hear it.”

“Um… you’ve seen that cherry tree from the balcony, right?” I don’t know where I’m taking this.

“Yeah.” It’s like all my theatre experience was the build-up to this specific moment. Inspiration hits me.

“I was looking at it, when, I saw myself in that tree.” Namjoon and Yoongi both look at me funny.

“You what now?” Yoongi set his food down.

“I could relate to it.”

“Oh. Okay. Go on.” He picked up his box again.

“That cherry tree, naturally, grew from a sapling. It braved the sun, rain, storm and hail alike and grew up. It survived. And it blossomed into this amazing adult tree.” I pause to read the room. Namjoon is seriously nodding along to my words. Yoongi, on the other hand, looks unconvinced. He’s not buying it.

“You see, I’m the cherry tree. And right now, I’m small and vulnerable, like a sapling. I don’t know if I’ll bloom like those other trees. What if I get blown in the wind? Some nasty kid uproots me? What if my stem breaks before my cherries pop?”

Namjoon chokes on something again. Yoongi passes him some water and looks terribly unimpressed. He looks like the casting director at auditions now. I act as if I didn’t just say that last line and go on.

“But one day, I will go through it all and emerge like a beautiful cherry blossom tree,” I rack my brain for lines like a desperate auditioner, “that everyone will admire. Not for the looks, of course, but for my talent. I will grow resilient, no matter what-“

Yoongi flings his chopsticks in the air. “Oh, shut up (y/n). Enough.” He sounds unsure of his own tone but looks at me hard.

“Yoon-“ Namjoon tries to intervene and gets shushed by both Yoongi and I. Sorry, leader.

“You two were upto something, and I know it. Stop acting.”

I stare at Yoongi poker-faced and beat a tattoo on the table top with my nails. Namjoon swallows without eating anything. I cock my eyebrow at Yoongi. His expression softens.

“I know it. Let me guess, he walked in on you crying?”

“Maybe he did.” I say blankly.

Yoongi’s expression softens and there’s no iciness in his tone anymore. “I was gone for what, 20 minutes?”

“15.”

“Okay, 15. He managed to cheer you up in 15 minutes?”

Namjoon tries hard to not smile but the subtle pride on his face is evident. I’m still not sure where this is going but I nod stiffly.

“Wow. That’s an achievement, Joon. She looked like she got sucker punched when I left. It usually takes her a 5 hour nap or really good food to get back to normal.”

The corners of my mouth turn up slightly. Namjoon grins unabashedly. A silly grin flashes across my face too and Yoongi smiles with his eyes. “You make me sound like a grizzly bear.” I say.

“Point being, you should probably stick around with (y/n) if you make her so happy.” Yoongi bumps Namjoon’s arm.

“So cheesy.” I snigger and roll my eyes.

“Are you serious?” Namjoon asks and the boys look at each other.

“Yeah.”

“What, just like that?” I ask, still unsure.

“I thought you kids were just fooling around last night, but if it means more than that to you,” Yoongi’s pitch drops, “who am I to stop you?”

“It’s just that, you know,” he trails off and fiddles with his palms,” (y/n), you’ve got so much on your plate, and Bangtan never seems to stay in the same place for more than two days. Neither of you deserve to suffer with that.” There’s maturity and truth in his tone. The room falls silent again.

”Hey, it’s not like we’re getting married.” I reply, finding my voice “I mean, I just, really… like him, you know. I love being around him.” I bite my lip, unsure of what to say next. Namjoon looks at me and his gaze hovers over my lips momentarily before clearing his throat. “I really like you too. Really do.”

I knew that, obviously, but hearing it made me feel warm and fluffy. I gushed.

“And, Yoongi, if you get awkward about it, don’t worry. We won’t make it awkward. Promise.” Namjoon says sincerely.

“Yeah, we’ll see about that.” Yoongi smirks.

“Don’t be a jerk to her. I know you won’t but it’s kind of ceremonious for me to say it.”

“Hyung, if there’s a bully here, it’s your cousin. Please ask her to be nice to me.” Namjoon says cheekily and takes my hand.

“Oh, please” I glare at him with adoration.

“Yeah, kid, don’t hurt him. Unless you want a diss track.” Yoongi says. Namjoon cracks up leaning back.

“Hey, Joon, let go of her for now. She has half a bowl of noodles left.” Yoongi says. With a squeeze, Namjoon uncurls his fingers from mine and I focus on my bowl. He smiles at me flirtatiously through the rest of the meal, dimples out, as I bite my lip and try not to blush. 

Yoongi finishes with his food and goes to his room with his cup of ice cream. The door closes behind him.

“Yah, Namjoon, I can smell you on my sheets!” he yells from inside.

“Don’t worry, you won’t have to anymore,” Namjoon yells back and winks at me.

Photo from a. g. a on weheartit

[itsamejin]

leave me || suga angst

Part 2

Warning: Use of the word "bitch" once, cheating, toxic relationship, yoongi is bad, really angsty

Summary: He's cheating and you're aware. You just don't know what to do about it.

–

"[Y/N], something came up at the studio. I need to get back. Don't wait up for me."

It would've been nice, you thought, if he at least looked up from his phone's screen and had the decency to acknowledge your existence. He struggled to put his leather jacket on as he kept typing away with his right hand.

He didn't even try anymore.

You heard him grab the keys and you couldn't help but clench every single muscle in your body. It was infuriating how easy it was for him to ignore you. To ignore the dinner you made and the effort you put into cooking his favorite food.

With a lost appetite, you slammed down the spoon in your hand onto the dining table.

You heard the front door close and heaved out a large sigh. Yoongi knew you would wait for him anyways, so why bother even mentioning it?

Making your way to the kitchen sink, you wondered where it all went wrong. If it was more your fault or his. If there was even a good reason for him to treat you like a stranger.

After aggressively scrubbing the remnants of food away from your plate, you had made your way to the living room and settled down on the couch. It'd be your best friend until Yoongi came home from "work."

The channel surfing managed to distract you from the dark thoughts that frequented your mind, but only temporarily. Once they would surface, the negativity would start to flow. It would make you start to wallow in sadness, becoming a destructive force that you would later take out on Yoongi in another argument.

You wondered why you were even shocked. Yoongi had never been affectionate in the first place and he wasn't the most attentive. Maybe it's because he always made it up to you in the end. Whether it would be a fancy seaside dinner or a midnight picnic. He always confirmed his love when it felt like you needed it the most, but now it's all reserved for the other girl.

The "other girl" was a cheap nickname for a beautiful yet naive supermodel that probably didn't even know of your existence. Her name was Jieun, not that it mattered. She was just the other girl to you. She'd never be anything more or less than a person that Yoongi chose to prioritize over you.

Maybe he thought he was being smart when he changed her contact on his phone to "boss". Maybe he knew you overheard him saying "love you too" in that soft, pale voice while he was hanging out at the porch. Maybe there was no Jieun and you were just a paranoid girlfriend that couldn't stop the neverending doubts that surfaced for the past three months.

But you knew that wasn't the case, even if you wished that it was. You were smart and so was Yoongi. He sometimes made it obvious, probably so you could break up with him first. Make him look like the victim. You didn't want to give up that easily, but your patience was waning. It wasn't fair, not at all. Six years of putting up with his bullshit and it takes one beautiful woman to ruin all of it.

An hour into waiting, you found yourself in tears with the television blaring in the background and the photo albums of Yoongi and you scattered around the living room. It always came down to this on the lonelier nights.

One photo in particular always caught your eye. It was a pair of interlocking hands, one calloused yet beautiful and the other being yours. It was taken the day you exchanged promise rings. Yoongi never wore his anymore because of "a possibility of being caught" but it was all bullshit. Staring back and forth between the photo and the real accessory that adorned your index finger, you realized that there was a slight rusting. It reminded you of something familiar.

–

It would be another four hours of scrounging through the pages until you realized it was way past 2 AM and that Yoongi probably stayed over the other girl's home. You don't know why, but it hurt more that night than the other times you naively waited for him to come home.

–

Two days until you'd catch a glimpse of Yoongi again. He hadn't even acknowledged you when he walked into the shared apartment. He just set his leather jacket down and proceeded to take a shower in the guest bedroom's bathroom.

You didn't understand why he'd wanted to move in with you when the members' dorm was literally two floors above your own. That's one of the primary reasons you two never got caught. They all entered the building together, but Yoongi happened to live separately. It was a good idea in hindsight, but it felt like a burden having to see them and their disapproving gazes.

You were never particularly close to the members, in all honesty. You were pretty sure they disliked you. Probably afraid of the destruction you could do to Yoongi's career. The thought of that was odd, of course, considering you should be the one weary of them. You knew him longer and you knew he never wanted to be an idol. His dream was to be a producer- a soloist at most. Not some manufactured idol that was showcased by the very people he despised in society. In time, Yoongi changed and soon grew to accept his new image.

Maybe you should too.

–

It would be a week after Yoongi's last visit that reports would start to come out about Yoongi and Jieun's possible relationship.

It would take only a few hours for it to be confirmed by both sides. Maybe your heart should've felt more broken, but you were so beaten down by now that it didn't even matter.

You told yourself six years ago that he deserved someone that could keep him happy and you had to change if he no longer was.

But you know better now and that it wasn't you who needed to change to make the relationship work. It would be and should be up to him.

What you needed to do was leave him, never turn back and start a life where you didn't have to feel like an embarrassing secret. Where a man would love you with his whole being and never take you for granted. At one point, Yoongi was that person. But the Yoongi you love is not the Yoongi that currently exists.

–

It took all your strength to pack up the items you owned in the apartment. All of the couple items were thrown in a trash bag, including the promise ring he had hid in the back of his underwear drawer. Your ring was still perched around your index finger. Taking it off would only serve to hurt you more. You'd put it back in a box and seal it away when your love for Yoongi was permanently erased. For now it will remain stuck to you like a battle scar.

The plushies he gave you, the paintings you made of him, and the photo albums with six years worth of memories were all stuffed into the trash. With tears smeared on your shirt, you piled plastic bags over the items to hide what you've done. That there was nothing to see and you definitely hadn't thrown six years of your life away into a Hefty bag.

Your luggage was packed with a minimal amount of clothes and while it was your place to begin with, you found yourself leaving it all behind and in the posession of your cheating ex-boyfriend. The only remainder of him left on you besides the promise ring was a physical copy of an old, unproduced mixtape of his. One unreleased song was in it and it was the only thing from Suga that you knew was exactly dedicated for you. Because he rapped it to you over the phone before his very first performance. The lyrics of the song played in your head to torment your sanity even further.

Even if you leave me

Know that I'll still love you

Fate will have us find each other

And then you'll love me too

One last look at the living room and you were off. There was no reason to stay in a place you no longer felt welcomed in.

–

{8:32 AM}

Babe: [Y/N] Did you only do your laundry and not mine? My clothes are dirty as shit would it have killed for you to do an extra load?

{12:39 PM}

Babe: [Y/N] You've been gone for like a few hours now. You good? I didn't mean what I said about the laundry thing I take it back.

{5:32 PM}

Babe: for fucks sake. Where the hell are you???

{7:18 PM}

Babe: If this is about Jieun then I'd prefer you and I just talk about it rather than hiding like a fucking coward

{8:04 PM}

Babe: [Y/N] istg

{10:45 PM}

Babe: Stop ignoring me I know you're getting these messages

{11:01 PM}

Babe: [Y/N]

{11:02 PM}

Babe: [Y/N]

{12:23 AM}

Babe: If this is your way of breaking up with me then fine.

so fucking be it you bitch

–

AN: i deleted my hendery angst pt 2 accidentally so here's a suga angst i wrote so long ago and decided to polish up now. Look forward to more content soon~ (should this be a series?)

[killmongerkink]

11:37 PM - Part 3.

Summary: Erik and you meet up at an unlikely location. 

Pairing: Erik ‘Killmonger’ Stevens X Black!Reader

Warning: oral sex & fluff. 

Length: 5k

BTW: i really wasn't planning on continuing this series. i kinda fell out of love with it, but then i reread my work and it made me want to write all over again lol. i’ll try not to take so long with writing these next few parts :/. enjoy and sorry for any typos!

CATCH UP: part 1 / part 2

MASTERLIST

"So, who's that broad you been chillin' with?"

Erik's attention was momentarily pulled from the game as Aaron questioned him. Him and his boys had been in the house for most of the day, deciding to meet up and chill since they didn't have shit else to do on a Saturday. It was Erik's day off at Acuity Brands where he was the lead data engineer, Lo had pulled a double shift to get the day off and Aaron didn't know the definition of a job, so it was a unanimous decision to link up.

"Chill with that broad shit man, she got a name."

"Well you won't tell us her name, so what the fuck else are we supposed to call her?" Lo replied, his head still stuck in his phone as he watched some rap battle on Twitter.

"Y'all ain't got to know her name, just know it ain't broad. Have some respect."

Aaron gave Lo a look in which Lo returned, before they both busted out laughing. Erik sat back, unamused by the two men. They had been questioning him since they got to his crib about the new girl he had been seen walking home a few times. He should've known niggas on the block couldn't mind their damn business. It's not that he had a problem with people seeing you with him, he just didn't want others knowing about what he had going on or trying to get to know you. You were the only thing in his life that he didn't have to share. When it came to his job, he shared that with his co-workers and uptight boss. When it came to his apartment, he shared that with the few close friends he had. When it came to you .. you were his. Not in the sense of you being his girl or anything like that, but he appreciated the fact that he was the only person you really knew here besides your Uncle and classmates. He was the one that got to walk you home, take you to all the dope mom and pops shops and show you the hidden foot spots around Harlem. The last thing he wanted was you getting close to someone else because then he'd be on the back burner. No longer would you need him to walk you home and he wouldn’t be able to see your face light up when he showed you something new due to someone else beating him to it. He'd be damned if that happened. His eyes shifted over to Aaron doing a broke down version of the woah and Lo hyping him up, especially not these niggas.

Erik wasted no time pulling out his phone and searching for your Instagram. It had been a while since he saw you, a week and a half to be exact. He didn't hit up the gas station these past couple days because he didn't really have anything to get, and he could only eat so many donuts and snickers before his body would start paying for it. During those days, he kept up with you via social media which wasn't much since you barely posted. Neither did he, but shit ... he wanted to know what you were up to. He could've just DM'd you since he didn't have your number. The realization making him pause, why didn't he have your number? He was gonna make sure he got that shit the next time he saw you. He could see you now, being all shy and awkward after he asked and the thought made him chuckle.

"What's so funny? Yo' ass being all quiet and shit. You lookin' at titties?" Aaron eyed Erik suspiciously, leaning back and craning his neck to look at his phone screen. 

"Yo, you ever mind your business?" Lo quipped back. "Now you know E private. I'm surprised his ass even got us in his crib, you know he be acting like he got the secret formula and shit in here." Lo shook his head, eyes still glued to his phone. 

Since Lo had been cool with Erik before Aaron, he knew him better. Erik didn't like people in his personal business or space, close friend or not, and if you began to ask one too many questions, he'd get suspicious quickly. Everyone knew that, but there were some people that just couldn't get the hint or just didn't give a damn and that was Aaron.

"Y'all so sensitive, acting like my gotdamn momma. I just know y'all better change them attitudes by tonight. You know his girl Tae having a kickback and we gotta be in there.” He pointed towards E, a quick “she ain’t my girl” leaving Erik’s lips. “She bringing all her homegirls from her campus and you know what that means." Aaron rubbed his hands together, a sly grin on his face as all three men exchanged a blur of ayeeeee's and yeeerrrrrr's. 

The apartment was pretty packed when Erik and his boys arrived. Most people already had drinks or a blunt in their hand, some boo'd up on the couch while others played dice and beer pong. When a few eyes noticed their presence, they were met with daps and laughs. A few random girls came up, offering to make them drinks and they nodded along, not dumb enough to refuse being served. 

They all made their way through the numerous bodies, standing by the kitchen entrance where Tae was talking loudly to a few friends. Erik had met her at a party a year or so back, and since then she’d been around. He threw her one of his signature smiles, knowing that it would make up for him curving her for these past couple weeks. It wasn't as if he was doing it on purpose, he just had more important shit to do with more important people. She acknowledged his smile by rolling her eyes and turned back to her conversation. He stayed put, knowing that she was trying hard not to walk over to him. He was pretty sure she already dogged him out to her friends, hence why they were all trying to look at him without being obvious. All it took was one of the randoms to hand him a drink before Tae was walking up.

"Hey Neicy, the girls in there need some help. Would you mind?" Her eyebrow rose, silently challenging the girl to not obey.

"Uh, sure thing." She nodded, looking at Erik one last time before shuffling back into the kitchen. 

Tae turned to him, sighing heavily as if the last place she wanted to be was here. While she was busy putting on a show, he took the opportunity to really look at her. It was easy to write her off since she was away at school, but now that she was back for the weekend he was planning on making it up to her. It didn't hurt that she looked even better than the last time he saw her.

"You been giving my shit away?"

Tae gave him a confused look before catching onto to his comment. Her shoulders bounced, her drink sloshing in her red solo cup. She knew that he wasn't one that was fond of someone else being in his shit, something he had made known when they first fucked. Word got around quick here and since he hadn't heard anything, he figured she was behaving herself at college. Tae looked over her shoulder, pleased that everyone was occupied in their own little world and looked back at Erik, saying nothing as she grabbed his hand and walked him back towards her bedroom. 

Erik relaxed at the end of the bed, careful not to spill his drink on himself while he leaned back and rested his weight on his elbows. He stared up at the ceiling for a second, wondering what you were doing. Probably home, catching up on work or watching Netflix. Tae's hands made quick work of his belt and jeans, pulling them down to his knees along with his boxers. A few seconds later, she made herself busy by licking a broad stripe along the length of his dick, going back and forth with no hands. She craned her neck to the side, using her tongue to lift the weight of his head before his dick was sinking into her warmth. Releasing a sigh, he felt tension flow from his body and into her mouth. It had been a minute since he got some head. He wasn't one to just lay down with anybody, so he kept a select few around that he could depend on. One of his favorites was Tae, but that changed when she started handing out ultimatums. She knew what it was since the beginning and that he wasn't in the correct mindspace for anything too serious. All Erik wanted was a girl he could chill with and fuck, all that extra shit didn't interest him. When he was told "either you cuff me or I'm not fucking with you anymore", he took that as his hint to dip on her, but it wasn't long before she was right back where she always was - on her knees.

Erik wondered if you were the type to do that, force someone into something that you knew they weren't interested in ... nah. If anything, you would be the one getting pushed to do something. Your quiet and shy nature was enough evidence to prove that, but he did notice that more of your personality was starting to show. Maybe it was because you were finally getting comfortable around him, maybe it was because he didn't allow you to shut down and crawl back into your hole when you were with him. He could see that you were goofy as hell, true to yourself and actually educated on various topics. He was just waiting for you to realize that. 

His attention was brought back to Tae when he felt her by his balls, her hand resting underneath them and her fingers wrapping around his dick, holding the two together in one hand. Her attempts to deep throat caused his hips to raise on their own, his girth making it nearly impossible for her to swallow it all, let alone get his nuts. That didn't deter her from making sure to give an adequate amount of attention to all of him though. He appreciated her efforts and enthusiasm, her watery eyes proving that she was really trying to go all out tonight. She dragged her mouth up his length, a loud pop resonating in the dark room before her hand jerked him slowly, Erik's low grunts mixing with the sounds of squelching due to a mixture of his pre-cum and her excessive amount of saliva. 

The image of you replacing Tae's form popped into his head and he felt his body jerk. Had you ever even done this before? He wouldn't be surprised if you hadn't, but the thought of you eagerly wanting to prove yourself as you kneeled in front of him had him ready to bust. Your lips were always glistening with that damn lipgloss he would see you use every now and again. And he could tell you had a long ass tongue from the times you would randomly stick it out after saying something funny. Shit would probably feel like heaven.

"Erik, what's wrong? Why are you being so nice?" She pouted, sticking her tongue out and slapping his head against it hard before sucking it to her mouth, only paying attention to his tip as if it was a lollipop. 

Her comment made him freeze, looking off to the side and realizing what she was saying was true. Usually, he was rough when it came to anything sexual. He got off to it, taking control and spitting out obscenities. There was no time to be soft and sweet, it just made the nut take longer to come in his opinion. So why the fuck was he being so laid back all of a sudden? A part of him was ticked off as he thought about it, raising up from the bed and gripping Tae's hair in his fist, earning a cry from her. 

"Ow Erik, that hurts.." Obviously not enough since seconds later she was back to doing her job. 

Now he was annoyed. He didn't even know why he bothered coming in here with her. He wasn't feeling it anymore and he just wanted to go for a drive, maybe stop by a place that he hadn't been in a couple of days. But he couldn’t pass up on some quick head so he sat back and let her do her thing, calling her out her name and holding her head in place so he could fuck her mouth. He ignored her hands trying to push against his thighs and watery eyes, his dick staying in the back of her throat as he fed her, dick draining his kids into her mouth before letting her go. With a deep sigh, he leaned back against the bed and relaxed. Tae quietly walked off to the adjoining bathroom, the water running filling the relatively quiet room except for the heavy bass vibrating through the walls. A few minutes later she was back, a warm feeling casing his dick as she wiped him carefully, planting a kiss on his head when she was done. 

“You must’ve really missed me huh? That was a big one.”

Erik ignored her question, raising from the bed and setting his cup on the dresser before pulling back up his clothes, Ferragamo belt buckled as he checked himself out in the mirror quickly. He chugged the alcohol down, discarding his cup back on the dresser for her to clean up.

“You know, you could visit me at school sometimes. My roommates are always out so we could have the place to ourselves. I hate that we only see each other when I come back home.” She shuffled out the door behind him, huffing when she realized she was being ignored.

Before they could reach the main area where the party was being held, he turned around and backed her into the wall. She looked up at him with desire in her eyes, hands smoothing his shirt across his chest as she eagerly waited for him to continue. Erik knew the hold he had over her, he could throw her to the side and she’d still come running back. Some would say he was trash for playing with her heart, but Tae knew what it was and she could make her own choices. Since she was going to be around for a couple of days, he wanted to keep things between them on a good note. He was way overdue for a good fuck and wanted to hit it at least twice before she went back to campus. He looked at her for a moment, her eyes slightly wet and still red from her tears earlier.

“How long you gon’ be in town again?”

“Until Tuesday. That gives us four whole days to do whatever we want. I could come over one day, maybe cook for you?”

Yeah, that wasn’t about to happen, but Erik wasn’t that much of an asshole to turn her down so bluntly at her own party. He just rose his brows, acting like he was thinking it over before shrugging, letting her know that he’d think about it. As he walked away, he knew the only way they were gonna meet up was if he came to her place. No one knew where he stayed except for family and those he considered family, and he was trying to keep it that way. He really just wanted to know how many days he had left until he could link up with you. With Tae in town, it would be next to impossible so he had to play it smart. He didn’t want you knowing about her and damn sure didn’t want her knowing about you. 

The house party had got crowded in the time they were away, more bodies littering the living room and kitchen. Erik made his way through the few people standing in the hallway, head turning slightly to his left when he saw some new people that wasn’t there when he came. It was a couple of girls and he didn’t really pay them any attention until a certain one caught his eye. Her hair was down in front of her face, slightly hiding her from his view. She looked good from the side, not as dolled up as the rest of the females surrounding her, but that just made her stand out more. He liked that she wasn’t trying too hard, she was just chillin’. Oversized baby blue t-shirt, black biker shorts and some Jordan 1 UNC patents on her feet. He nodded his head to himself, silently approving her fit.

Fly lil thing. Ass fat too.

If it wasn’t for Tae on his heels, then he would’ve tried to shoot his shot. Just as he was about to keep it pushing, Tae’s loud shrieking made his face screw up as he looked back her, confused at her loud ass outburst. She told him to wait there for her and brushed past him, running up to the new group and wrapping her arms around their shoulders. He begrudgingly listened, hands stuffed in his jean pockets as he looked on. She turned around and skipped over to him, wrapping her hands around his forearm and pulling him over to where she was once standing. 

“Guys, this is Erik. Erik, these are my friends from school.”

He nodded his head and went to reply until baby blue turned her head in his direction, the room around him pausing briefly as his eyebrows lowered in confusion before raising in disbelief. 

The last thing you expected was to see Erik at Tae's party. 

Tae had invited you about a week or so ago, along with a few others girls from your sociology class. She was having it at her cousin's apartment, which was where she stayed when she wasn't on campus, and made sure to make all the girls promise that they would come. Claims of it being the best party you’d ever go to and not wanting to come off rude, you decided to go. You could tell early on that keeping up with appearances was a big deal for her. You couldn't recall a day where she wasn't looking her best or even seemed stressed. How she did it? It was above you. There were moments where you saw the real her, but they were few and far between. Whenever she would realize she was dropping this 'confident bad bitch' persona she liked to put on, she would quickly tighten up and go back to being the girl everyone knew her as. On campus, she was the IT girl. Guys wanted her, girls either wanted to be her or fight her. She was one of those people that you would rather have as a friend than an enemy for sure. So you knew you had to show your face, she’d feel some type of way if you didn’t. 

You didn't know if you should say hi to Erik or not with the way Tae was holding onto him. It was very territorial and knowing her, she wouldn't appreciate the fact that you two already knew each other. The girls all said hi after she introduced him, yours coming out a little later than everyone else's as you looked at him a little confused. Were they dating? He hadn't pushed her off or said anything since she brought him over and with the way she was going on and on about him, they obviously had some type of relationship. He nodded his head and mumbled a low "wassup" back, his eyes passing over your classmates before resting back on you. So this was why you hadn't seen him lately. He was spending all his time with her.

"You guys having a good time? Happy you came?" Tae smiled brightly, eagerly looking at you all and waiting for a response. 

"It's lit, your cousin is so cool for letting you have it at her place." "Girl duh and you got some fine ass friends, introduce me to some." "Hell yes. If not, I would've been stuck in the house being bored." Everyone spoke over one another.

She nodded her head, catching on that you hadn't spoke yet and looked at you, raising her eyebrow. 

"It's great." You smiled brightly. "I’m happy I came."

"Uh, I'm so happy you guys are having a good time. Well, I need to go make a couple more rounds. Someone here was occupying my time and I couldn't say hi to everyone." The smirk she threw Erik when she looked up at him had your eyes desperately wanting to roll, but you stopped yourself. 

There was no reason for you to be mad. It's not like you guys were close friends or anything. He was just a regular that you'd ring up. The same regular that made it a routine to walk you home from work. The same regular that had been introducing you to some of the best food spots that you ever could've imagined. You couldn't even begin to think about all the good food that you'd scarfed down in the past week. Either way, it was obvious that the Erik standing before you and the Erik at those times were different people. You could feel his energy and it wasn't the same sweet flirty one that you were used to. Instead, he had this confident air that was clouding over him and you would've thought it was attractive if it wasn't for him standing next to Tae. 

You all nodded and told her you'd catch up afterwards, your eyes not bothering to look back at the man before you started to make your way into the kitchen. A red solo cup later, you were perched on one of the barstools and listening to some funny story that Marissa was telling, or at least trying to. From where you were sitting, you could see Erik and Tae perfectly. She was sitting on his lap as she talked to some people, his hand on the couch armrest before she was pulling it around her. He kept his arm around her waist, his head slowly looking around the apartment until he was looking at you. Making eye contact was inevitable, since you were too slow to look away or play off your obvious staring. You gave him a small smile, the corner of your lip raising quickly before going back down. He returned it, eyes casting downward before he was turning back to those around him. 

The next hour and a half flew by. The company of your friends mixed with some of your favorite songs and a funny ass dance battle between some guys had you enjoying yourself. Somehow you ended up joining a group of people playing Never Have I Ever and you felt a little left out as everyone knocked back shots while you just held yours. The questions started off fun, but quickly turned sexual, making your lack of experience obvious when you could do nothing but watch everyone drink. You lied on a few, and laughed off others, all while unknowingly being watched. When you realized it was around 1:30 am, you decided it was time to dip. It was pretty late and you had work tomorrow, along with an essay to type up. You didn't want to regret it in the morning, so you bid your friends a goodbye and promised to text them when you made it home. 

As you got up and hugged them all, you made eye contact with Erik’s back as he laughed loudly at something. Surprisingly you didn’t spot Tae anywhere near him. You didn't really want to talk to him, annoyed that he hadn't spoken to you the entire night and instead decided to stick to Tae as if he was on a leash. It seemed like he was fine when it came to walking you home in the dead of night, but couldn’t be bothered with a simple “how are you?” now. You couldn’t even lie to yourself and say this was shocking. This wasn’t the first time a guy had ignored you around his friends and you were sure it wouldn’t be the last.

The walk home was going to take you about 15 minutes, which wasn’t too bad you guessed. It was late so the sun was long gone now and there’d be a nice breeze to accompany you. You had your little pepper spray if anything went down and a baby taser your Uncle pretty much forced you to carry. Exiting out the building, the lights from neighboring apartments and the corner stores kept the block lit for you. You were happy that you decided to get out a little, but couldn’t deny that being alone was ten times better. You could finally breathe and walk freely without worrying about bumping into somebody or vice versa.

After 6 blocks, you were starting to feel the repercussions of walking in shoes that weren’t broken in. Your heel was starting to throb, but you did your best to ignore it and adjusted your bag over your shoulder. The sounds of cars here and there weren’t out of norm, but you started to get nervous when you realized that one was driving suspiciously slow for no good reason. You hadn’t been paying attention so you had no clue how long they’d been there, but as you heard the slow and steady rumble of the engine trail behind you, you began to wish you had stayed at the party. Or at least gotten an Uber. Nonetheless, you kept walking and looking forward. It wasn’t until you stopped to let a car pass that a deep voice met your ears.

“You know I could’ve kidnapped your ass if I really wanted to right?”

You clicked your tongue, head shaking slowly as you recognized who it was. Of course it was him. With your arms crossed over your chest, you turned your body towards the car and slowly walked over. This was the first time you had actually seen it and it actually fit him, intimidating and sexy. You held back your smile as you watched him tilt his head at you, before knocking his head back, inviting you to get in without words. As much as you wanted to, thoughts of him and Tae together held you in place. They had something going on, you were sure of it, so you didn’t want to continue getting too close to him just to end up with your feelings hurt. You were also still salty that this was the first time he was speaking to you this night. 

“Shouldn’t you be getting back to Tae’s? I’m sure she’s probably wondering where you went.”

“Who says she doesn’t know already?”

“Based on the fact that she wouldn’t let you out her sight, I highly doubt that.”

Before Erik could respond, his phone started ringing. As he was going to answer it, he whispered a quick "get in" that you didn't obey. You could tell he was getting annoyed, but it was funny watching him roll his eyes like a spoiled child. The noise around you guys unfortunately prevented you from hearing his conversation, so you were stuck using your context clues to figure out what was going on. 

"Sup?"

"My bad bro, I had to dip out real quick. Something came up."

His thumb pointed towards the passenger seat and you shook your head, amused as he sucked his teeth and sat back. He stared at you as he continued to talk and you tried your best to look everywhere but him. At the stop light, at the LED open signs that blinked in the business windows, even at the empty trash bag that was currently rolling down the sidewalk. Literally anything to stop your eyes from landing on him. 

"Catch a fucking Uber my nigga, the fuck?"

"Not tonight. I got important shit to handle. I'll hit you tomorrow."

From your peripheral, you watched him hang up and stick his hand out the window, reaching for you. He was definitely trying to be cute, small pout on his face as his fingers finally brushed against your arm. 

"Why you playing hard to get?"

"I'm not. I'm just trying to figure out why you're so adamant about me getting in your car when I'm literally like 5 blocks from my place."

"A lot can happen in 5 blocks and if you don't get in, I'm just gonna follow you the rest of the way."

"That's really ... stalkerish."

"I don't care." He said bluntly, shrugging his shoulders. 

After some time, you finally listened and got inside. Deep down you wanted to hop in as soon as you saw him, but you wanted to see if he was gonna be persistent. His eyes followed you as you slipped inside, purse now in your lap as you protectively held it against you. It was being lifted off you and onto the floor with a huff seconds later, Erik’s hand pulling the seatbelt around you, unaware of how his knuckles were brushing against your breasts. He was too busy going on about how you shouldn't be walking late at night to notice. You stayed quiet, stomach now in knots as he tried to find the buckle that your thighs were hiding. You lifted up some, assisting him and trying not to overthink when you felt his hands on your hips. Finally he clicked it in and you were able to breath, relaxing into the seat as he took the car out of park and rolled up to the now red light. 

"So, what important shit do you have to handle?" You questioned innocently. 

"You."

* * * * *

taglist: those below are people that asked to be tagged, i saw in my notes on part 1/2 or mutuals :). if you don’t wanna be tagged in future updates then please let me know!

@hearteyes-for-killmonger @erikaintdead @chaneajoyyy @james-heaven-barnes @iamrheaspeaks @raysunshine78 @kimpossible1977 @twistedcharismaaa @janelledarling @thadelightfulone @thehomierobbstark @purple-apricots @yoyolovesbucky @journeytomeee @wakanda-inspired @l-auteuse @ghostfacekill-monger @hidden-treasures21 @eye-raq @enigmaticaphrodite @junesbride @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @werkoutbliss @imagine-n-shit @honeytoffee @michaelsgoldengurl @theblackblackwidow @destinio1 @eriksprincess @blowmymbackout @melaninmarvelgirl62 @savagescorpion @blackgirlreadsfanfic @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @vikkidc @maddiestundentwritergaines

[youremeimyou]

Old Friends

pairing: Jung Hoseok x reader genre: fluff, comedy, slight drama high school crush au and there’s a Hoseok vs y/n rap battle in there, somewhere word count: 6k warnings: just some passionate kissing, oh and shirtless Hoseok;)

Description: Hoseok is your high school friend that you had a different kind of relationship with. You run into him, after many years and rekindle your friendship. Then he takes you to your high school reunion and claims you as his girlfriend. But it’s only an act. Right?

A/N: EGO IS OUT!! I can’t get enough of it, or enough of J-hope. Hence, this oneshot. I gave this my all and had fun reading it back so I’m hoping it’s not shitty. Pls let me know what you think of it. Also I changed the way I write and reffered to the reader as ‘you’ for this one- idk i wanted to try it. If you guys have prefferences you can let me know. I hope you like it. Enjoy!

It's official, you hate summer. Sure.. school's out, no more chasing after professors or migraines lasting for weeks. But goddamn it it's hot and humid. It's like trying to breathe in a sauna, which you hate. Plus, the sun is like a deadly laser. Normally you love strolling through this street. Glancing at cute little stores and admiring street artists as you walk by. Not today, though. Not while feeling like all the water in your body is gonna evaporate any second.

You notice a little crowd up ahead, a half circle. And the sound of a groovy beat captures your attention. You might've stopped and joined the crowd just for the captivating music, if it wasn't for the torturous heat. In this instance you'll settle for only a glance at whatever show is going on inside that half circle.

That's until you see the street dancer there and you stop dead in your tracks. Someone is crazy enough to dance in this heat. Someone manages to look like the greatest performer alive despite the sweat covering his body and the fact that he's probably about to pass out. That someone is Jung Hoseok.

Before you can do anything else, you realize just how much better he’s become. And he was already an amazing dancer the last time you saw him. Back in high school, that is. Hobi the bubbly, cheerful dancer that dominated talent shows every year. Hobi who you occasionally helped pass chemistry. Hobi who could actually also sing, a fact only you knew about him of all the kids at your school. Because you’d spend most of your time in the music room, usually all by yourself. But one time, you caught him sitting alone and singing in there and after that, he’d visit you every so often. In return, he was the only one that knew you composed songs.

It’s been three years since graduation and your last conversation with him. But right now, he’s standing right in front of you. No, he’s dancing. The music ends in time with his final move and the mini crowd goes wild. As he catches his breath, most people leave money in his hat on the floor. You hope they’re being generous. Rightfully so, that was one hell of a performance.

You contemplate on whether you should say hi or not. The introvert in you decides you shouldn’t but before you can turn around to leave, you make eye contact with Hoseok.

“Y/N?” he asks.

“Hey, Hoseok.”

And he smiles. Despite how exhausted he must be, he gives you a whole cheekbones lifted, classic Hobi smile.

“You were amazing. But how did you not faint dancing in a weather like this?” you ask, smiling back.

“Come to think of it, I do feel like blacking out.” he says in between his panting.

You panic and go closer to him quickly. “I can take you to the hospital-”

“I’m kidding, Y/N.”

Did you maybe miss his mischevous ass? You both giggle.

“How about taking me to an icecream shop to catch up, instead? It’s been so freaking long. If you don’t have any plans, I mean.”

Your plan is going home, opening the refrigerator door and standing in front of it. So they’re skippable for an old friend.

“Let’s go before you deteriorate.”

You take him to the closest icecream shop you know and the shop has great air conditioning, thank god. Hoseok sits down and you feel as though he won’t be able to get up and order. Despite the smiley and bright facade of his, his body seems to be worn out. So, you take the liberty to order for both of you.

As you wait in line, order and wait for them to prepare it, you think about what you wanna say to Hoseok. Regardless of how much time has passed, you notice how you still get a little nervous with him around. It used to be like that in high school, too. You could never really look him in the eyes while he was speaking with you. You wouldn’t be intimidated. You’d just be kinda.. overwhelmed.

You take the cups and make your way to the table. Hoseok’s eyes light up, he seems content with your choice. He also looks better now, the cool air of the shop must’ve helped.

“What’re the odds of us meeting like this? Just on the street?” he initiates conversation.

“Well, I’m not exactly surprised to find Hope on the streets.”

“You remember my stage name?” He looks geniunely surprised.

“How can I possibly forget crowds of people going crazy, cheering J-hooope?”

That makes him shy, you think. With him averting his eyes to the ground. You’d hear those cheers often, back then. Hoseok was known as ‘J-hope’ and his act ‘Hope on the street’ was very popular. Everyone in Gwangju High would come to watch him perform, including you. It really is a bit strange how you ran into each other randomly on a street in Seoul, you think. You both had dreams of moving to Seoul as teenagers and had told each other about it. But neither of you knew if the other actually made it there. Until now.

"Did you move here right after graduation? I remember you talking about wanting to persue music here at University of Seoul." he says with his eyes on his icecream. He remembers your dream.

"Yeah, I had to get out of there. I moved here even before knowing if the university had accepted me. Thankfully, I got in. What about you? When did you come here?"

After he takes a spoon of the good stuff, he takes his eyes off from his cup and connects them with yours. It happens so suddenly that you almost blush. You're able to hold it in, though. Barely.

"I kinda wanted to wait until my work at the dance academy was done. So, after two more years at Gwangju, I finally transferred here, to National University of Arts just at the beginning of this semester."

You're glad to see him not giving up on dancing because he's so talented for it that it isn't like anything you've seen before or after you've known him. When he dances, it's like whatever music he's moving to actually finds form in him. And when he's not dancing, the way he moves around, walks, talks still somehow appears artistic.

But then, you realize you've been staring at him, lost in your train of thoughts. And he must've noticed because one corner of his mouth curves upwards a little, forming an almost smirk. This time, you can't stop your cheeks from turning red. Fuck.. What's wrong with you? It's been years since you've even seen his face. Why the hell did you just turn into a teenager, all over again?

"How's music school? Did you drop any albums I'm missing out on?" He asks and his eyes go back to his icecream. You can breathe normally again.

"I think school is always a pain in the ass. Even if it's about music." is your reply. You both laugh.

"I couldn't agree more."

Normally you have a hard time talking about yourself with others. But when it comes to Hoseok, it's different. Because that kinda used to be your relationship back in the days. Talking to each other about stuff you wouldn't with others.

"I've been working in a studio a friend of mine opened and we're working on some stuff but.. I can't seem to finish anything I start so, no. I haven't really been productive." you add with a frown. There're lots of things you don't like about yourself and being a procrastinator is one of them.

Then, a hand is placed lightly on yours that was resting on the table. It's Hoseok, holding your hand and looking at you warmly. "Nah, I'm still pretty sure we're gonna hear your stuff on the radio, soon." He looks like he geniunely believes that. All you can do is smile back in appreciation.

Time goes by as you talk about all kinds of stuff. You learn he lives at the student dorm but he's not exactly happy about it and wants to find a new place to stay. Also that he's giving dance lessons to earn some extra cash. You tell him about Yoongi, that friend of yours who owns a studio and how he's looking for someone to move in, after his flatmate moved away. You promise to have the two meet each other and see if they can become roomates.

Hoseok suggests to exchange numbers but it turns out both of you haven't changed them since high school, so you both have the other in your contacts. And you say goodbye shortly after, agreeing on hanging out again, soon.

By the time you get home, it's already evening and you're a little hesitant to open up the door and greet your roommate, Namjoon. Because you promised him that you'd watch that philosophical movie you can't remember the name of together. But you were supposed to do that about two hours ago. You decide to just go in and explain how you ran into an old friend and got held up. Namjoon'll understand, right? You go inside but see that nobody's home, so you call him.

"What's up ditcher?" is how he answers the phone and you can't blame him, really.

"I'm so sorry Joon. I wanna make it up to you but.. where are you, exactly?"

"Yoongi's."

"Okay, don't move." You hang up the phone and go straight into the apartment across the hall from yours. Yoongi has already opened the door before you can knock. You make for the living room and spot your roommate there. Just as you're about to explain, you also spot credits rolling on the tv screen and finished popcorn bowls.

"Wow, you watched Waking Day without me?" you complain. And Namjoon is quick to respond.

"It's Waking Life and yes, since you were a no-show."

"But you didn't even leave me popcorn."

"What're you saying? There's some left right here." Yoongi is the one who hands you one of the bowls.

"There are literally only three kernels here."

"Well, that's what ditchers get." Yoongi is just as merciless as Namjoon.

"But what if something happened to me on my way back-" you try the approach of pulling on their heartstrings but both of them whip their necks back and look at you in extreme worry, so you decide not to mess around. "Okay, okay. I encountered an old friend and lost track of time catching up. But maybe we can watch another movie and I'll make the popcorn, huh?" You wear a guilty grin on your face.

"Nope. You should take a seat and tell me about this friend that made you ditch me."

You sit down in between the guys on the couch, but you're facing Namjoon and telling him about Hoseok. Yoongi only sees your back and he's just so done with you, as always.

"You guys have a house exactly symmetrical to mine across the hall. Why the hell are you always here? I know it's not to see me, you're not even looking at me." It's a mix between ranting and whining. Both you and Namjoon know he's doing it to get attention.

"Because your couch is comfier." says Namjoon.

"And you have a piano." you add.

"You have a keyboard!"

"My keyboard is no upright piano."

Yoongi gives up with a huff. But you attack him with tickles until he gives in and giggles, all the while trying to get rid of your hands.

"By the way Yoongs, you're still looking for a roommate, right?"

"Yeah, why?"

"The friend of mine from Gwangju I was catching up with, Hoseok, is looking for a new place. I want to introduce you guys."

"Sure. What can you tell me about him?"

You pause because there're lots of things you can say about him. But those are all about the high school Hoseok. You wonder how many of them changed and how many stayed the same. You're sure of some things, though.

"I can tell you that he's a great guy and a dedicated artist, a dancer. Also he's funny and a mood maker."

"Alright. You should bring him over."

"Great! I will."

You wake up to your phone buzzing repeatedly. First thing you do is check the time and your clock on the wall is striking 11:30 in the morning. You overslept, great. It makes sense after you convinced Namjoon to binge watch Death Note before going to bed. But you ended up sleeping on the couch. The fact that you're in your bed right now means Namjoon carried you there.

3 unread messages from Hoseok.

-Morning, Y/N.

-Are you free today?

-I wanna treat you to some coffee.

It's been three to four days since the time you ran into Hoseok and you've been meaning to reach out to him to hang out but he just beat you to it. You thank the god for his extrovertedness.

-I'm taking care of some stuff in the studio today.

-But you can visit me there and if I'm finished quickly we can even hang out later, too.

-If you'd like, of course.

You press send and for some stupid reason your heart races a little fast. Were you being too forward? He just said coffee, maybe he meant a quick get together. You just asked him to wait for you in a studio, possibly for a couple of hours.

Two more buzzing.

-Sure! I'll make sure to help out so you can finish faster.

-Text me the time and the adress when you can.

You sigh in relief. But now it's time to be nervous about how you'll be alone with him there for a long while. Not that it makes you uncomfortable. You just feel that overwhelming feeling of him being around returning. You hope to at least not act like an idiot.

You make your way to the studio and text Hoseok the location, saying he could drop by whenever he'd like. Yoongi told you to listen to some demos for him but you leave that for last. For now, you're setting up some instruments and tuning them up for the band arranged to record tomorrow. But the bell rings and you sprint to answer the door.

"Hi!" you greet him.

"Hey." Hoseok says with a bright smile. He holds up the bags in his hands. "I brought food and icelattes."

"Which makes you a hero. Come in."

You eat and drink your coffees as you talk about stuff. Then, you play a recording of a guy who did an awful cover of Smelly Cat a few days ago. It makes Hoseok laugh so hard that he tumbles out of his seat and falls towards you. You knew it was a habit of his but you had never been the person he falls over to, before.

He helps you get the rest of the things done after that and surely him giving you a hand speeds up the process. For the last thing, you call him over to listen to the demos.

"Wow, some of these are really good. Especially this one, I like the beat a lot."

"Yeap, me too. I'm showing this one to Yoongi, later."

Finished up with the things, you're getting ready to leave but you hear him beatboxing the beat he liked a while ago.

"You can beatbox?"

"Yeah, I picked it up not so long ago."

An idea pops into your mind. You take him by the arm, practically drag him back to the recording booth and hand him a mic.

"Get a beat going."

"Wha-"

"Just do it." And you run back to record him doing it. After that, you throw in some other instruments quickly. When you play the outcome, he smiles so hard.

"How did you just do that in such a short time, coming up with practically a song."

"You did it, too. You came up with a beat off the top of your head. That's the basis of songs, mostly."

He listens to it over and over. "Hey can I use this for when I do freestyle battles?"

"To dance over to? Sure! I'll work on it some more, though and perfect it."

He shys away a little. "Well, this would make a great dance track but.. I meant freestyle rap battles."

"You rap, too? Geez, is there any street art you're not talented in?" You're not that surprised, though. He always stroke you as swag in living form.

"I'm trying to get into it. I should improve if I wanna make a name for myself out on the streets of Seoul." he says half jokingly but it's true that the rap scene has become a major part of street competition, recently. You know from Yoongi and Namjoon who are also rappers.

You play the beat from the top. "C'mon, then. Let me hear a snippet."

"No, no I'm not really-"

"C'mon~ let's battle." you say to get him worked up a bit. Also, you picked up a few things from Yoongi and Namjoon over the last couple of years.

"Oh battle? Okay then, why don't you go first?"

Both of you try to control your laughter and you come up with some very stupid and childlike rhymes that make Hoseok laugh even harder.

"It's your turn, J-hope."

"Ooo~" he gets more fired up with the mention of his stage name. You're going back and forth rapping about the most random and funny stuff. But then you get bolder and want to go at him a bit, to get him more serious about this. Trying to remember embarrassing things he's done in high school, you throw in lines about the time he had to dance in his underpants in front of the whole school after losing a bet.

Also, there's this face you pull whenever you try to diss someone, something you picked up from Yoongi. But it looks funny on you and the boys always make fun of you about it. You're sure you're doing it right now, too out of habit. And you're not wrong because as soon as you're done, Hoseok starts and he mentions it.

Except, he says something along the lines of despite of you having that expression, he still doesn't feel like you're dissing him because of how beautiful you look even while pulling a funny face.

What? Did he just call you beautiful? In a rap battle?

You're in shock and aren't able to speak for a while. Which Hoseok takes advantage of. "You failed to come up with something in time, Y/N. I win." Then he boops your nose. He fucking boops your nose. What did you get yourself into?

It's the day you finally bring Hoseok to meet with Yoongi. It's been a couple of weeks since you guys started hanging out kinda on a regular basis and Yoongi finally had some free time. The three of you are sitting in Yoongi's living room and you're watcing them get to know each other. Everything seems to go well. The door opens and Namjoon walks in.

"Yo. Sorry I'm late."

"It's okay since you live far away. Oh wait, you live across the hall." Yoongi is quick to welcome him.

"At least I brought dessert."

The two boys go into the kitchen to get dessert ready to be served.

"That's my roomate Namjoon. He wanted to meet you, too." you inform Hoseok.

"Roommate? Wait- you live just next door?"

"Yeah."

"Why didn't you tell me sooner? I'd beg to Yoongi or something to get him to accept me!" he says with a smile. You're glad he's happy about the fact you might live next to each other.

"I think he already likes you. I'm pretty sure you got the room."

And you turn out to be right. Hoseok and Yoongi hit it off quickly and he moves in a couple of days later. You start spending even more time together since then. Both with the other boys around and just you two, alone.

This one time Yoongi gives you the day off, Namjoon is off to do a job interview and you've got absolutely nothing to do. So you go over to see Hoseok. You knock and ring the bell but loud music is coming from inside and he doesn't hear you. The door isn't locked, though and you just go in. When you get to the living room you see Hoseok practising, going really hard at it. There're sweatdrops on his face and his white shirt-now practically see through shirt-is stuck to his body, revealing the delicate structure of it.

Blood rushes to your cheeks and your heart is thumping but you can't look away. He's art, you think. Art that you can't get enough of. He finally notices you, which almost gives you a heart attack but thankfully he isn't uncomfortable with you being there.

"Hey- uh- phew." he tries to talk but needs a moment to catch his breath, first. "Y/N. Please tell me you've been standing there long enough that you saw my new moves."

You nod, still not completely out of your daze. "They were.." you trail off because he just casually takes his shirt off in front of you. "Can you pass me that?" he asks you to hand him over the towel on the chair next to you. You're on autopilot as you do so.

"So, what do you think?"

"Oh yeah- Umm.. it was awesome. Very captivating.."

"Thanks." he smiles brightly while walking closer to you. "I'm gonna take a quick shower. You wanna hang out, after?"

Right. That's why you came over, you remember. "Yeah, I'll be here."

Hoseok and you just hang inside all day. Not doing much but still managing to have fun. Yoongi comes home for a while but has to go back out again, so it's mostly just you two. In the middle of the night, you guys start watching a movie, planning to stay awake till morning but Hoseok's tired from practising earlier and dozes off, eventually. And you're famous for sleeping in front of the tv, so you quickly follow. Then, you two somehow get in a cuddly position in your sleep.

The next morning- or more like afternoon, you wake up to Yoongi slurping his coffee, seated right across from you. Hoseok's nowhere to be seen.

"Hey Yoongs, why am I still here?"

"Well, you obviously fell asleep in front of the tv again and Namjoon's strong arms weren't here to carry you to bed."

"Where is he?"

"Joon said he was staying at a friend last night, not wanting to get all soaked up in the rain. And Hobi woke up just moments ago and went out, saying he has to get ready for a gig."

You nod at him and get up. You're about to go back to your place to wash up but realize something suddenly.

"Since when do you call him Hobi?"

"Since when do you have a crush on him?"

Your eyes go wide with panic. "Wha- No way what're you say-"

"Do you think I'm blind? I can perfectly see it when two people are cuddling on my couch."

"We just fell asleep that's all-"

"I saw you two over at the piano, too. And in the kitchen a few days ago doing the dishes. And while dancing here in the living room for no reason. You can't look him in the eyes without going red and he can't take his eyes off of you."

There isn't much you can say to convince him otherwise because you realize that he's right. At first when you guys started hanging out again, you thought you felt butterflies because you kinda had a thing for him in high school. You paid it no mind thinking it'd fade away with time but it didn't. Your feelings only grew stronger and now you know it was visible to others.

What has you tensed up, however is the way Yoongi talks about the situation like it's both-sided. That's where you can't be sure. Because yes, Hoseok randomly calls you beautiful, takes you out for meals and spends entire days with you. But you don't know if he likes you like that or if he's just being friendly. Just like back in high school.

"Okay, yeah. He makes me feel a certain way. But there's nothing going on, we haven't even talked about it. I don't think he's into me like that."

Yoongi's brows furrow in confusion. "He was just asking me if anything was going on between you and Joon the other day, though."

He asked what?

"What?"

"Dude, he was obviously jealous and suspicious of the fact that you were roommates. And very close ones."

You did have a very close bond with Namjoon, just as you did with Yoongi. Yoongi's just involved less skinship and more serious talk. But Namjoon was the first person who friended you in Seoul and over the years he became your self proclaimed guardian angel. That was all.

"You didn't correct him?!"

"I tried but he seemed overwhelmed with confusion, I'm not sure if he fully believed me. Or fully listened? I dunno- I was kinda enjoying his little emotional crisis."

"Yoongs!"

"Fine! So yeah, maybe you should to talk to him."

How do you talk to someone about this? you wonder. And can Yoongi really be right about the possibility of him reciprocating your feelings?

You're reading a book on your couch. It's been a couple of days since your cuddly interaction with Hoseok and you haven't really hung out after that, either. You're not avoiding him, though. More like testing the waters. Namjoon's little squeal and sprint to the living room gets you out of your thoughts.

"Y/N! Oh my god!"

"Joonie what happened?"

"I got in." His smile is from ear to ear but you're not surprised he got the job he was going after for a while now. He happens to be intelligent beyond your understanding. But also a goofball. Because he -who usually treats books like his children- throws the one you were reading away and gets you up on his back. Now you're both singing victory songs as he gives you a piggy back ride.

Just then, Hoseok makes an entrance to your apartment, sees you two and his face visibly drops.

"Oh- sorry guys. I should've knocked-"

"Dude, it's okay. Think about our two apartments as one big house. You don't have to worry about knocking everytime. Come in!" Namjoon is being his friendly self as he puts you down. "I gotta go call my parents. Thanks for always believing in me, Y/N." He places a soft peck on the top of your head and goes back to his room. Uh-oh. You hope Hoseok doesn't misunderstand.

"How are you doing, Hobi?"

"I'm-" he hesitates for a while. "I didn't know you and Namjoon were.. are you? Y'know like together?"

"No!" you regret yelling but it just comes out before you can stop. "I mean, it's not like that. We're friends. In fact he kinda decleared himself my older brother."

The total grimace that had took over Hoseok's face starts to slowly dissappear. "Oh, okay. I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable like that-"

"No, no. Let's just change the subject." You want to move on from this before it gets awkward.

"Okay. Oh right! I came over to show you something."

He holds out his phone for you to see. It's an invite to an event. Gwangju High's high school reunion, to be exact. You also got one, too but immediately deleted.

"The reunion? You're going?" you ask.

"We should go."

You're about to protest but he cuts in.

"I know most of our year were jerks. But it's Gwangju. I know you miss it there. And high school wasn't all evil."

"It was the people who were evil, Hobi."

"That's why we have to show them their evil ways weren't enough to break us down."

"What do you mean, we? Everyone loved you!"

"The jocks hated me for being popular despite not playing football."

That was true. They sometimes gave him a hard time for grabbing the attention of girls more than them.

"Besides, we're grown ups. If they weren't able to mature, that's their problem. We'll just breathe in some hometown air and have fun."

You did miss home. And the fact Hoseok'll be with you eases your stress so you say yes.

Hoseok and you roam the streets of Gwangju, firstly. You tell him the places you missed most and you visit those. When the reunion evening closes in, both of you go to your homes to get ready. Your parents are sort of shocked you're attending the event but they won't complain because they missed you a lot and you haven't realized how much you missed them back till you finally came back after a long while.

Hoseok comes to pick you up and oh boy. He immediately recongnizes the dress you're wearing as the exact one you wore to prom. The light blue piece fits your body even more perfectly now, he thinks.

"This is your prom dress." It's not a question because he's certain.

You panic because well you wore it thinking nobody would remember since not a lot of people were paying attention to you during prom and you didn't have anything else decent enough in your old closet. How the hell does he remember?

"It looks even more beautiful." And with that, your panic is no more.

You get to the school finally and almost everyone is there. All trying very hard to look fancy, so Hoseok and you make fun of some of them before entering.

"It's J-hope!", "Hope's back!" and "Who is that with Hoseok?" are the comments you hear as you walk by. A few speeches are given, while you stuff your face with cupcakes. Then music's on and people start dancing.

Hoseok is approached by many and he kindly converses with them all. He forces you to speak from time to time, too. One of the boys who you used to tutor a lot, Hansung, tries to make a couple of moves on you. Probably under the influence of alcohol. You politely dismiss him but some other guys that came alone also are eyeing you from different places of the room. Hoseok is well aware and not okay with it, at all.

He slides a hand down your arm and links your fingers. When you turn to him in surprise, he pulls you closer. "Let's act like a couple."

"What-"

"I'm sick of people trying to see if you're available for them, aren't you?"

It is a bit disturbing. You bet most of them didn't even recognize you and are just looking for a prey for the night. "I am." you reply.

"Then just go with it."

So you do that but this time the girls start to get uncomfortable since most of them were eyeing Hoseok. And like clockwork, Gaeun appears with her gang of plastic girls. Gaeun used to be Hoseok's biggest fan. But all she actually wanted was to get into his pants just cause of how popular he was. Knowing this, you tense up. Her eyes hold such a suggestive look that you almost want to protect Hoseok from her.

As far as you know Hoseok has never indulged her like that back in school days. And he doesn't seem to be effected by the way she looks right now, either which can be described in two words: model legs.

"Hobi~" her irritating voice muses. "There're lots of girls wanting to dance with you tonight."

He takes his hand away from yours to claimingly grab you waist. "Sorry, ladies. My dances are all booked by this one, right here." He turns his head and places a kiss on your temple.

"I'm sure your date for the night won't mind if-"

"She's not just my date for the night. Y/N is my girlfriend." he cuts her off. Shock is evident not only on their faces but yours as well. The girls have to walk away awkwardly but what they think they're speaking among themselves is quite audible to you.

"There's no way. Y/N could never be enough for him. Just wait until the end of the night and see how he gets bored."

Hoseok didn't hear them. But you and some other people did. And you don't care what Gaeun says but her words get around fast and people are looking at you even more weirdly than before. Hoseok realizes your body tensing up.

"What's the matter?"

"I don't think people are buying that we're together. Especially after Gaeun started speaking to them."

He looks around to find that people really were looking at you suspiciously.

"Let's make it more believable, then."

He pulls you to the dancefloor and starts moving you to the rhythm. You've danced with him before but they were all silly ones, meant for fun. This one was serious. And your bodies were seriously close. But you just let him lead you, knowing that he knows what he's doing. After a while he figures that the music's ending so he twirls you around and finishes with a sudden dip.

You're back is resting againt his hand as you're leant back and Hoseok's face is so very close to yours. Some people clap and some don't but neither of you really care about the people watching anymore. Then he kisses you. He downright kisses you at the center of the dancefloor. It's passionate but gentle. He doesn't let go for a while but you've no clue how long it's been cause you're lost in the taste of him. Which is a thousand times sharper than the whiskey and a thousand times sweeter than the cupcakes.

He pulls you back up, finally parting your lips. "I think we got about enough attention. Wanna get out of here? We can go to the music room." he suggests. All you can do is nod cause you still can't form words.

You get there and it's the only place in this school that you've missed. You sit down on the piano seat and Hoseok pulls a chair next to you, it's like deja vu.

"You know the song you used to play, the one I liked a lot. River-"

"River flows in you." of course you remember.

"Yeah. I kinda tried learning that on the piano a while back."

"Show me."

He tries to play it and messes up some bits so you help him out. Then, your hands touch accidentally and you both freeze.

"Y/N-"

"Hoseok-"

You both try to speak at the same time and cut each other off, so you laugh. Hoseok goes for it again.

"Y/N. I wanted to ask you out so many times right here, as you'd play songs to me. Did you know that?"

You most certainly did not.

"I wanted to ask you to a dance at the prom, so bad. But you left before I could muster up the courage."

He turns to face you completely.

"I couldn't believe it when I found you again, like that. Everything I felt came back to me as we spent more and more time with each other. And when I got that invite.. I thought- Maybe I've been given a second chance, to do it right this time."

Your heart is racing so fast that you can hear it. Every word he said are things that you've been thinking. So you have to do it properly this time, too.

"So.. so, will you go out with-"

You crash your lips with his immediately and he responds in a flash. This time the kiss is much more deep and demanding. His hands travel down to your waist as you get up from your seat and move to his lap. He hums into your mouth and you try to take in every bit of the vibration from it before both of you pull apart, out of breath.

But he still looks at you with questioning eyes, as if you haven't just given him an answer clear as day. But he looks so cute that you entertain him.

"Yes, high school crush. I will go out with you."

He can finally smile again. Though, it turns into a smirk a while later.

"But will you go out with me?" you joke around, still sitting on his lap.

"I will go out with you so bad that it'll swipe you right off your feet."

As if he already doesn't..

....

A/N: Wowzers, my first Hoseok fic is finished.. I know this was long and thanks sooo much if you bared with me and read it. It would mean a great deal to me to know what you thought of this so, I’d love to have your feedback. Thanks again for reading and have a lobely daayyy :)

PS: How beautiful is Hoseok btw..