#FMK: joe edition

[mamaestapa]

FUCK MARRY KILL

Beard Joe

LSU Joe

OSU Joe

oh this is tough bc all three are DELICIOUS

F: lsu joe (he was SOMETHING else. the confidence, the old teeth, the school colors, lsu joe is just so hot. i’m f-ing him FS)

M: beard joe (i love a clean shaved joe, but, beard joe just hits different and i’d love to marry that version of him)

K: osu joe (ONLY BC as a michigan fan, i hate ohio state, and therefore, i cannot chose any other option for osu joe.)

[monsterrae1]

Because I know you are a Fan

FMK - The JoBros edition.

This is the worst ask I’ve ever gotten

Marry Nick - I’m still bitter he didn’t marry my ngl

Fuck Joe - I just wanna know

Kiss Kevin - cause I am NOT killing him

Gimme attention pls

[royallyprincesslilly]

FMK Mortal Kombat Edition. Sub-Zero, Scorpion, Cole 🙃

Lmfaooooo wow this seems a bit twisted.

I am going to assume you mean the new MK. Damn tough choice.

Marry Scorpion. I have always been a scorpion girl and hello Hiroyuki Sanada has been aging like fine wine.

I don't think I can complete the rest. 🤣

F**k Sub-Zero although ice place is not my thing (I don't think 🤔) Joe Taslim is 🤤 and it could be a good time and an interesting story to tell. If I live 🙃

I'm not killing Cole. There ain't no way. If I marry Scorpion doesn't that make him my descendant too? Cole lives. 😉

[numberthirtyfive]

FMK: Belt, Posey, Panik!

oh gosh, aha. my poor babies!

fuck: Brandon Belt, because my gosh. enough said. y’all don’t need to hear the horny details, aha

marry: Buster Posey. Georgia Peach who takes care of his family. oh yes.

kill: MY SON JOE PANIK I’M SO SORRY HONEY

(why was this so hard, aha~)

FMK: MLB Edition!

[nitewrighter]

Fmk: Cursed edition: Donald Trump, Michael Bloomberg, Joe Rogan

Marry Michael Bloomberg (secure wealth via prenup and murder on wedding night before redistributing wealth), Fuck Joe Rogan (In order to gain trust and then murder immediately after Fallout New Vegas Style) and Kill D*nald Tr*mp because god knows I don't want that guy's fake tan rubbing off on me in any way shape or form before I kill him.

[vroomvroommuppett]

FMK Barry Edition

Druig

Dymphna

Joe (Mammal)

we’re doing fuck marry kiss cause i’m not killing one

fuck: dympha (but like be his gf)

marry: druig (au where he marries an eternal)

kiss: joe (only cause i haven’t seen the movie)

[krisrix]

Fuck, marry, kill: Jonas brothers edition

I am so sorry, anon, but I know literally nothing about the Jonas brothers. Are there three of them? That’s my initial guess - and since this is a fmk, I assume there are three options.

I was about to ask if one of them is Harry Styles, but that doesn’t make sense...

I think the only other vague idea I have about them is that they’re a Disney thing???

Okay, I’ve googled them so that I can answer your question, but that hasn’t really helped other than that I now know their faces and names. And that I’m older than two of them.

Fuck: Kevin - one and done, don’t want to have to look at him again after

Marry: Joe - he has a face I could stand looking at for the rest of my life, and I like that he isn’t taller than me

Kill: Nick - he looks like a fuckboy, and not in a good way, so that means he’s the one that has to go, sorry

[trademarknickersoncharm]

FMK, second chances edition: Musical Joe Gillis, Musical John Laurens, & Musical King Arthur.

F- JOHN LAURENS ALL THE WAY. raiSE A GLASS TO FREEDOM. also f bc he is Anthony ramos

M- King Arthur. Homie is a king. Also it’s the lusty month of May rn

K- Joe Gillis as much as it pains me

[youreamonocoque]

Fmk Joe edition (ok I'm tryna see how many same first name themed asks I can manage 😁) Root, Denly, Burns

Marry Rooty, Burns is being killed purely because he’s an aussie and so that means I’m fucking Denly by process of elimination!

[boygirlz]

fmk the jonas brothers

kill joe fuck nick marry kevin

Edit: kill kev, fuck joe, marry my boi nick

[josthockeythings]

FMK old school edition. Adam Foote, Patrick Roy, Joe Sakic

F: Adam Foote because I wouldn’t do the othersM: Patrick Roy probs just for the moneyK: Sakic because then we might actually have decent depth to the team now rather than an average of 21...Anyway... if I could probs just kill all of them.

[patrice-bergerons]

fmk wrong team edition: kun, joe hart, carra

WOW anon have mercy omg, or this is apt punishment for having so many faves who play for the wrong clubs I don’t know. Anyway, so:

I know we are not killing Carra. I did this for a ficlet and even that nearly killed me. # never again. I think this is the best I can do though it’s a very difficult choice

-- Fuck Carra. The man is super attractive and I dig the arms and the slightly graying temples and yes, even the accent. FIGHT ME ON THIS FIGHT ME

-- Marry Charles. There is just something about him that gets to me, something soft and tender, like he is a genuinely good person (despite being a white man) and someone who has an understated but genuinely funny sense of humor. I think I have a type for soft boys idk.

--Kill Kun :”( I can’t even believe I’m typing this but process of elimination it is my friends. Sorry Kun.