#F&C is all plot right away which is also just as good but now its like really getting into your feelings

[thebigqueer]

honestly whenever fionna and cake ends i think ill be the saddest ill ever be for adventure time because now its like a fully formed plot. i mean OG adventure time was also good & cute & fun & deeply existential but F&C feels like its going deeper into all the secrets of this world and when it ends ill be so sad like i am having such a whimsical time

[sugako]

c+k: osamu

osamu x f!reader

sum: a fun at-home dinner date with Osamu for the lovely holiday

cw: 18+ minors dni, nsfw, smut, fluff, mentions of food/eating, unprotected sex/creampie, toy use, mild degradation, rough sex, slight size kink

wc: 1.5k

a/n: part of confessions + kisses.....got a little carried away with plot so it’s not quite as short as the others whoopsie

"Do you remember when you confessed to me?" Osamu's soft whisper fanned hot air into your ear just as you began to stir. 

"Happy Valentine's Day to you, too. Mmmh, course I do, 'samu. Why?" You arched against him, stretching the sleepy ache from your body, then slowly turned over toward him. "It was pretty embarrassing." 

"It was cute." He purred, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "You were so nervous, I thought you were gonna pass out." 

"I-...is that why you gave me food?" Feeling more awake with the realization, you perked up a little. 

"Maybe," he wrapped his arms around your waist and laid backing, pulling you on top of his plush chest. "I also didn't want to waste those leftovers." 

…..

You straightened your cute, flouncy dress out in the mirror for the third time. It was silly, getting excited about a little at home dinner date, but you couldn't help it. 

Osamu had been working on dinner and dessert for hours. You found it hard to believe when he told you that wasn't your present. Although you were well aware his own cooking was just as much a present to himself. 

Carefully, you hoisted up the hefty present, wrapped up in cute paper. A heavy duty, beautiful wooden cutting board he had been eyeing for months. Tucked inside the silly, sweet card was a small stack of risque film prints of yourself. Presents for Osamu could be a difficult search, but you felt confident this time. 

Just as you shuffled into the kitchen, he was setting the table. 

"Gifts already?" He smirked and took the box and card from you. As he sat he began peeling the wrapping paper back carefully. His normally calm face lit up when he saw just a corner of the box and his steady fingers worked a little quicker to tear the paper away. "I love you." He set the box on the floor beside him. 

With a prideful beam, you nearly bounced in your seat as he opened the card. Once again, his expression changed, but in a different way this time. 

"Do you like them?" You basically whispered as he leafed through the photos. Though excited, there was a little pit of nervousness in the bottom of your stomach. 

“Do I-... They’re very, very nice.” He answered breathily before clearing his throat. “I’ll give you yours after food, sound good?” 

You hadn’t wanted to seem so eager, but you were honestly more excited for the cooling food than whatever gift he had gotten. He, on the other hand, was salivating a little bit more over the pictures of you than the food. If he gave you the silly, little gift he had gotten - which he now felt was stupid in light of your very thoughtful presents - he wouldn’t even get to eat before dinner got cold. 

A soft smile graced his features through his bites as he watched you happily chew. Slowly, you both worked your way through the food, stopping every now and then to chat about anything and everything. Silence truly settled over you both after you had finished the last bite of dessert. Feeling full and warm and fuzzy, you gently laced your fingers through his over the table. 

“Gift time?” You finally asked. 

Osamu grinned lazily and reached under the table, keeping his hands laced with yours. He pushed the two small boxes toward you with an uneasy look on his face barely masked by his expression. You took them as soon as they touched your fingertips.

Your other hand slipped out of his and made quick work of unwrapping the first box - fancy, gourmet chocolates from a small business. The next box was a little more difficult. All extra taped up just to make you work for it. At last, you revealed a chunky, black box. Your eyes slowly widened as you lifted the lid. 

“This feels a little rude in comparison.” He chuckled, watching carefully as you slowly lifed out the vibrator. It was heftier and definitely better well-made than any toy you had owned before. 

“I think it’s perfectly fine. Better than fine.”

“C’mere.” He groaned, reaching out for you. Setting the toy back into its box, you quickly rounded the table to sit against his lap, lips connecting the instant you landed. He held you there with one strong hand gripping your thigh. 

“Might… have to… test it,” you panted between sloppy kisses and reached behind you to grab the vibrator. His fingers dug into your skin. 

“Oh yeah?” A sly glint crept into his pretty eyes. 

He stood, dragging you with him as if to go toward your bedroom, but stopping short when you whimpered at the ache from his tight grip. Strong arms spun you against the nearest edge of counter and tore the toy out of your hand. One of his muscled thighs pressed against the back of your ass, forcing your front to dig against the countertop. 

“Knew you would be impatient, so I went ahead and checked everything, cleaned it too. Even though it’s going into your filthy cunt in a few seconds.” He growled into your ear and flipped the bottom of your dress over your ass. 

You wiggled your hips just enough for him to get a peek of your cutest panties as you bent the rest of the way over the counter. The chill against your cheek was enough to make you shiver, but his roughened hands smoothing over the slope of your ass warmed your core. 

“I’m surprised you didn’t fuck me when you saw those pictures. You’re so easy to fluster, ‘samu.” You giggle as he pulls your damp underwear down to your ankles, letting you kick them off. 

“Such a fucking tease. Can’t believe I thought you were so shy.” Taking a deep inhale, his hand came down to land a sharp blow against your backside. “But you’re really just a dumb slut.” 

The name made you whine and sigh, your legs spreading wider for him. The loud hum from the toy shocked you before he slid it against your folds. You weren’t sure what setting he had it turned to, but the instant, violent pressure against your clit was making you hump at nothing in nearly a minute. 

“Gonna cum already?” He asked, mockingly. 

“Ah! Uh-huh… gonna, uh, gonna cum, ‘samu!” You squeaked while Osamu rubbed the toy against you, letting you quickly find your release. Hips jitter and spark over nothing, twitching in the air like a feral animal. He decreased the intensity, but kept it pressed ever-so-lightly against your clit to help you ride out your high.

“Be a good girl and hold it for me?” He passed the toy between your legs and into your limp hand. “Want you to cum around my cock while I fuck you hard.” 

You nodded dumbly, still catching your breath. Haphazardly, you managed to hold it against yourself, grimacing at how your cunt still throbbed and your clit ached for more. The only slow part about the rest of the night was when Osamu took the time to line himself up with your entrance before immediately ramming into you. 

The force nearly knocked the toy to the ground. Still, you held steadfast onto the little object, feeling his cock hit you deep and hard with every stroke. It wasn’t much, but you were beginning to come undone again. The way his thighs slapped the back of your ass and the toy were egging you on closer and closer to the spectacular finish line. 

His hands were holding you and himself steady by gripping onto your hips as leverage to fuck himself into you. He watched, panting and whining, at the way your pussy stretched around him, gushing out that beautiful cum that coated him completely. 

When your knees began to buckle, he held you up, barely able to tease since he felt himself getting so close as well. 

“Cumming again so soon?” He groaned, hoping you wouldn’t catch how strained his tone was. Your little hole was sucking him deep, pulsing and clenching at every harsh motion. 

Of course, he was right. You were too fucked out to respond or really hear him at that. The initial burn of the tight stretch long gone, all you could feel was engulfing ecstasy. His cock was perfectly molded inside of you, filling you to the brim. You could feel all of him and it was far too much. You crossed the finish line in a disjointed chorus of whines and moans and spasms. 

“C-cumming!” You cried out, but he already knew. He could barely move the way you clamped around him and yet he couldn’t stop. Really digging his hands into you now, he fucked himself over the edge, letting you milk him dry in your still pulsing cunt. You could feel the hot splash of his cum paint your insides and sighed, contentedly when his motions slowed and he held himself buried completely inside of you. 

Exhausted, you pulled the vibe away and turned it off. He slumped over your back, pressing his clothed chest completely against you, pinning you closer to the countertop. Between gasps for air, he snuck little kisses in against the exposed skin on the back of your neck. 

“Happy Valentine’s Day.” He sighed. 

[scrawnytreedemon]

Shit I’ve Been Winding Up For A Long Time Now But Am Very Aware Will Probably Hold No Relevance Should I Actually Go Into This More--

This is about Bhunivelze.

I.

You know, when I was chilling out, on my bed, that evening on that half term in early June, deciding to check up on ClementJ64′s FF retrospective because-- Hey! It’s been awhile, I wonder if he’s got around to doing the final bit of the FFXIII saga --You know, I was there, chilling, just for a laff. Just a laff.

The rest of that week was spent spiralling into a hyperfixation I absolutely did not anticipate in any way, shape, or form, because the way they introduced that character was “wwhdhfjjhHJDFJKHKJHW H A T??”

That retrospective and a good amount of wiki-scrounging is all I have as a basis for this. This is not a coherent character analysis-- Though I might tag it as that for ease of access. This is not, by any means, the thoughts of someone deeply familiar with FFXIII on the whole beyond plot synopses and overarching themes.

I don’t think I’m brave enough for that.

Reading the vast yet surface-deep lore on those wiki pages on my birthday while in a delirious state of mind was enough to make me somewhat nauseous.

Do you think I’m going to go through all of that in real time?

(Someday, someday.)

Ugh, I don’t know how to begin, but let us, I guess. I’d recommend you read this church-mime-demiurge’s FF Wiki page if you want the same level of base-knowledge I had, and maybe the aformentioned retrospective if you want the experience, because I don’t think I have the wherewithal to get into all of that from the bottom-up.

I am also, so, so fucking sorry for any remaining FFXIII fans in advance. There is like, a good chance I may be butchering the characterisation completely, so bear with me here.

With that... we begin?

Where do we even start with this guy?

How on earth to you begin to explain the absolute monolith you’ve constructed from crumbs of a Guy, some material no doubt spliced in from the Pale King, Sephiroth, y o u r  o w n  G o d  O C and other characters, and the mountains of religious trauma you carry around at all times that is probably the only reason you’ve been able to latch on as hard as you did?

I’m going to try.

What gets me, in summary, about Bhunivelze is how he’s a prime example of how love and concern can become deadly forces if in the wrong hands. His first acquainting with human emotion was by deceiving and possessing Hope, reverting his body to a teenage state, and planning to live among humanity through him. He sees human sorrow and suffering, and decides that, to End This(because it must be ended, you see) he’s going to destroy all the souls of the deceased that make up the Chaos that’s been eating this world for the past five-hundred years so they all forget and Are Happy. :).

Capital G God here hasn’t been present for the vast part of human history because he’s hidden himself away from Everything due to paranoia from killing his own mother and throwing her body into the Cosmic Basement, THEN creating the beings that would come to create humanity and OTHER beings because he didn’t have the keys to the cosmic basement. And also he believes death is a thing because she’d’ve somehow cursed all things to pass(including him) out of Spite.

Which explains why he’s so fucking averse to it and anything to do with it.

Bhunivelze, to put it lightly, is Shit at stepping into others’ shoes and Getting their experiences-- All the FalCie in FFXIII are, but him especially. It’s clear(again, in the f u c k i n g JP--) that he makes attempts to sympathise with them and does what he can to help, but it’s with such a loftiness and a complete inability to Understand why anyone would want grief, The Worst Fucking Experience In Existence, and even less why they’d be willing to Go Up Against Him And HisThe New Perfect World just for it-- And what would it matter, anyway, forgetting their loved ones. It’s not like you can grieve lost memories, right?

Right.

It reminds me of when at the end of the story of Job in the Bible, where, after putting this man through hell on earth, God rewards Job by giving him ten new children to make up for the ones that he lost. I. And that’s fucked! Nothing can replace the sheer uniqueness of each individual person you loved so dearly! But if you were a nigh-omnipotent deity high and mighty, with a cursory, almost mechanical knowledge on the functionings of the human psyche, that would seem adequete; enough.

Bhunivelze is doing that on a cosmic level.

I now want to get onto the romance: that being, his affections for Lightning. I don’t know how much I’m going to say, but it’ll probably be alot. It’s something that hits very close to home.

There is this... thing, within certain branches of Christianity, perhaps even in those of various Abrahamic faiths, where God’s love is posited to be the love-- The ultimate, most-fulfilling, all-encompassing love you could ever imagine --Because, well, he is love, so the story goes, and so often the best way to convey that is through the imagery of...

Marriage.

Giving up yourself so completely, to serve, to be the Bride; to be bound by him for all eternity; and for there to be no higher bliss than this.

This angle is pushed on young girls and women the most; from the mere parallels to the woman’s role in marriage, all the way down to downright-horrifying ultra-Evangelical purity pacts. With men, God is your dad, your best bud and confidant, your boss, your king, your this, your that, and the ‘marriage‘ as it were is relegated to a sort of half-thought; a metaphor.

For me, God was an attempt at all that, and my arranged groom.

(It was almost incestuous; was incestuous, that my own Divine Father would reach for my hand in marriage.)

Bhunivelze experiences Emotions™ for the first time through Hope, experiences Hope’s sheer overwhelming admiration for Lighting(whether there were any baby-crush feelings mixed in, I can’t say), and promptly falls into a nigh-romantic obsession with Lightning, deciding that she will be Etro(his all-but daughter)’s replacement, will be his Goddess of Death to-be-- He even calls her as such, before the final boss-battle--

...In the JP.

What happened in localisation, probably due to a number of factors, all the way back in early 2014, was that everything emotionally challenging about Bhunivelze was scraped off, like it was extra fat, and tossed aside, leaving us with the bland, clichéd shell of a foe-god we’ve seen time and time again. And I mean everything. I mean his very love for humanity; the fact his ploy was, in his eyes, to save them. Because if they’d left that all on, then it would raise the question of even if there was such a seemingly pure, all-knowing, loving being hell-bent on setting things “straight,“ would they truly be unquestionable? Would we have the right to fight for our humanity in the face of the Creator of the Universe?

To reject a love so personal?

That’s what gets me about FFXIII’s tackling of God, no matter how hackneyed and poorly-executed. It’s personal.

It’s from a feminine experience.

I know that terming is... vague, and problematic, but the way Christianity and much of the video game industry handle femininity itself is weird and problematic, so as it stands, I’ll have to simplify it. Apologies.

What sets FFXIII’s Let’s Kill God™ plot aside from most JRPG Let’s Kill God™ plots is that with our protagonist being a woman, and one who is very in touch with her femininity alongside her sheer strength; often, in these stories, God is reduced to Yet Another Foe, expected or unexpected, and you are tasked with taking him down unquestioningly for the Good of Mankind-- You will fight God, because you are right to, and you will go man-to-man-to-however-many-men you decide to bring along for the bloodbath.

And that just, doesn’t speak to me.

Even as an Extian.

Especially as an Extian. And an AFAB one with a deeply complicated experience with my gender, at that.

Leaving Christianity was painful. Questioning God was painful. Coming to terms with the fact that I had been mentally, emotionally, and spiritually traumatised under the guise of All-Encompassing Love was so, so fucking painful. I had been taught since I was five years old to devote myself to him, spent my life desperate to feel something, anything, to stay connected because I just, I never could Feel It on a deeper level, never could Give Up Myself, all I was, couldn’t Die A Spiritual Death And Be Reborn As His Eager Vessel, thus deeming myself to be worthless and a broken vessel for years and years on end... And for all that to have been... Nothing.

Lightning is hollowed out, the shards of her dead sister ripped from her in-stasis, leaving her emotionally numb for the majority of the game, Bhunivelze sweeps it under the rug, pretends he’ll perform a miracle and return Serah to life in exchange for her compliance, then sends her on her way to do his work, all the while knowing he’s going to pull said-rug from under her and elevate her such dizzying heights in the aftermath--

That he’ll deny her humanity.

Sand down all the rough edges that make her her, and polish her up afterwards, gild her as he is gilded, make her a Goddess.

And he’ll do it all because he loves her.

You can’t fight God like you can everything else. To fight It is the fight Existence Itself; FFXIII even conveys that by making Bhunivelze’s model part of the arena; it’s baked into the fabric of the game, no matter how minute.

While Lightning Returns is far from perfect in its execution of this concept, and that in itself makes me wince, not even taking into account the horribly botched excuse for a localisation Bhunivelze endured, it speaks to me more than anything else I’ve seen so far.

And it’s helped uncover some things within me. Helped me untangle them, just a little more.

So, yeah. I have alot of Thoughts on Bhunivelze, I want to share them, and I’m kinda really sad I have no one but my currently-absent friend Vee to share them with. I could get into alot more, like his very Fucked relationship with familial bonds, and how Lightning’s role as saviour so deeply parallels the overwhelming panic and never-ending guilt of Evangelical proselytisation, but I think I’ll leave those for another time.

In short, Bhunivelze is the epitome of Divine Love gone deeply wrong; on all fronts.

And if all of that isn’t enough to intrigue you, then, in Vee’s words, Lightning and Velze are literally canon endgame Sefikura lmaOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--

[animensfw-smut]

Future! Obanai x Future! Reader Fluff

This one is a fluffy oneshot requested by @Mins000

I have 15 requests left altogether and i update once a week, so I’ll be pretty slow updating the requests ^^’’

GIF doesn’t belong to me~~~

Oh, i also changed the plot slightly to how i interpreted it (^_^)

I’m not going to replace the reader with Mitsuri for this so i hope you don’t mind. The reader will be an ice pillar once she arrives in the past.

WARNINGS: Hot make out session with some sexual writing???

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*(y/n)’s pov*

“Mm...” It all felt... Cold. Deathly silent. One thing i didn’t understand was why the surface beneath me was not as soft as the surface i had slept on the night before. 

Groaning, i placed my arm over my eyes, the sunlight blinding me when i tried to open my eyes. Huh? What was this?

Jolting up, I looked at the sleeve that had covered my face. Why am i wearing a haori?! I certainly did not go to sleep with this! My eyes caught sight of the trees around me. Wait, trees? Where am i?

Snow covered the ground below me as i tried to figure out where in all hells i was. I observed what i was wearing. What seemed to be a black coloured uniform fitted my figure, a/an (f/c) haori covered with light blue snowflake designs placed over the uniform, and a katana fixed at my side. The scabbard was decorated with the same designs as my haori but the colours were switched. Careful to not harm myself with the sharp weapon, I pulled the katana out of its sheath and admired as it glittered in the light. I jumped slightly when the colour changed to an amazingly bright blue. My fingers ran over the kanji carved into the katana:

氷の死

Death of Ice

(Or what i think it translates to? I used google translate ^^’’)

I was confused. Why am i here? Where am i? What happened to me?

Voices reached my ears followed by the crunching of the snow.

“Oi you bastard! Listen to me! You’re not everything you think you are!”

“Shut up, you’re too loud Sanemi.” came a muffled voice. It seemed like the voice was covered by something. 

I got up quickly, afraid that those people may be dangerous. Taking a deep breath, i ran from the place with no destination in mind. Soon after, the sound of pounding footsteps followed after me. I started panicking. Why are they following me...?!

“Hey you! Stop running!” A sigh was heard right after,

“Do you seriously think she’ll stop running just because you said so?”

I didn’t look where i was going and ended up tripping. I groaned, sitting up, the wound in my arm gushing out blood.

“Ouch...” Three tall shadows loomed over me and i froze before slowly looking up.

“Er... Hi...?” The dude with the scars on his face started speaking,

“Who are you? And why are you in these forests?”

“I don’t know. I just woke up her-” He grabbed my top, bringing me close to his face. However, before he could say anything he was stopped by a hand at his arm,

“Sanemi, stop.” The male’s voice was soothing and calmed me. There was another male who was silent, his eyes piercing into my soul causing a shiver to escape me.

“More like who are YOU guys? I don’t even know where i am!” I huffed.The silent dude eyed me before his eyes stopped at my katana and uniform,

“You’re a demon slayer?”

“What’s that?” He walked towards me, dragging my katana out of its sheath. His fingers traced over the kanji near the bottom,

“Ice pillar. Why do you have this sword?”

“I told you. I just woke up here, and why are we dressed like this?”

“Dressed like what?” Inquired the masked man. Sigh... His eyes look so pretty...

I gestured to myself,

“Like this.”

“I’m afraid i do not get what you are saying.” The next thing i know, i had blacked out due to a certain short-tempered boy knocking me out.

*Third pov*

Obanai ended up having to carry (y/n) on his back,

“Why am i carrying her when you knocked her out?”

“Because.”

He grunted in displeasure as he trekked up the mountain path towards the Demon Slayer Corps.

(y/n) was placed on a bed as the other three went to find Ubuyashiki. There, they discussed about the other pillar they had found.

“Ah, so you finally found her. She had lost her memories after a fight with upper moon one and was unconscious for a long time. But she suddenly disappeared one day and we haven’t found her since then. It’s good that you three found her. However, i will need somebody to look after her for some time before she starts to regain her memories.”

All the boys looked at each other before Sanemi and Giyuu stepped backwards. Obanai rolled his eyes,

“How come you two agree over the worst things?”

“Don’t worry you can do this job better than we can.” Spoke Sanemi as he slapped his friend on the back. Obanai grunted before bowing,

“I accept the mission.”

(y/n) had slowly started to awaken again and she groaned,

“Why am i somewhere else again?”

“You’re at the Demon Slayer Corps and I’m the one assigned to look after you.” 

*(y/n)’s pov*

I turned my head to look towards the source of the voice. My heart skipped a beat at the intense stare he gave me. Gulping, i stammered,

“W-Well, nice to meet you. I-I’m (l/n) (y/n).”

“Iguro Obanai. Are you ready to go?” My brows furrowed,

“Go where?”

“My estate. If I’m looking after you, we’re not going to be staying here.”

“O-Oh, yeah. I-I’m ready to go now.” I sat up from the bed, following behind him as we walked to his estate.

Upon arriving, we realised that he only had one room which meant we had to sleep in the same room. He had a spare futon laid out for me and he flopped onto his own bed,

“If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask me.”

“Thank you.”

“Mm.” With that, he turned his back to me as he slept, snoring softly. A sigh escaped me as i continued to stare holes into the ceiling. What was going on? I still had a lot of questions that needed answering, but right now i needed sleep. 

Birds chirping awakened me, there was no sound of the noisy traffic outside of my apartment. Giving out a whine at the shadow looming over me and blocking the sunlight, i slowly opened my sleepy eyes,

“Hm?”

“Hey, you gonna wake up yet? I need to train and you do too.” Who was that? My eyes finally adjusted and everything hits me all at once. Oh, i was still stuck here.

“Wait, train? For what?” Iguro closed his eyes before giving out a sigh,

“You’re a demon slayer, a person who kills demons... You know what, forget it. Seems like I’m going to have to teach you all about demons from scratch... Even though you’re supposedly a higher rank than i am...” His hand covered his face as he breathed in and muttered,

“I have a lot of work to do...”

Over the course of the next few days, I had gotten closer to Obanai to the point where i was able to call him by his first name. He taught me about demon slaying and the techniques and breathing. Strangely enough, when it came to the fighting and the breaths, my body automatically moves by itself.

Right now, me and Obanai were sparring with each other. His fist came in contact with my stomach causing my eyes to widen at the pain. Before he could back away, i grabbed his wrist and flipped him over me, his back landing on the ground with a thud. A groan escaped him and i straddled him to pin him down. i grinned,

“I win.” He said nothing, continuing to stare at my features. It was a calming silence between us as i started to admire his facial features. His heterochromia eyes were attractive and pulled me closer towards him.

Feeling brave, i placed my lips over his through the mask before getting off of him quickly and running. I yelped when my wrist was pulled backwards and my waist was grabbed by his hand. Obanai pulled me to his chest, his lips ghosting over my ear,

“If you wanted to kiss me, all you had to do was ask.” My chin was lifted up, his lips pressing against mine in a desperate kiss. He pulled my hips towards his, making sure there was no space between us. Lust fogged over my thoughts as his tongue pushed into my mouth. His tongue pressed against mine, exploring the wet cavern and leaving no place untouched. Feeling weak, my hands gripped his sleeves tightly as my knees started to buckle, and Obanai’s arms supported me, pressing into my waist to force me deeper into the kiss and plunging his tongue down my throat. Small whimpers escaped me as his hands grabbed my ass, kneading the flesh there as the saliva dripped down my chin when our tongues tangled together, tugging and pulling. His hips began to rock against mine, a noticeable bulge forming and creating a delicious friction against my clothed and dripping core.

Ignoring the need for oxygen, we continued to kiss and grind against each other. It wasn’t until black spots appeared in my vision did we stop. Gasping for air, i laid my head against his chest, closing my eyes and enjoying the embrace.

“(y/n)...” He muttered, stroking my hair.

“Hm?”

“Be with me.” Ah, a smile graced my features as i nodded,

“I will.”

The next day we were lounging about on the engawa, enjoying the sun. Obanai’s head lay in my lap, my nimble fingers playing with his hair. I pecked his forehead,

“What’s that for?”

“Nothing, just wanted to show some affection~” A small, barely visible, smile tugged on his lips as he reached his hand to the back of my head, pressing me towards him for a kiss. 

“What’s that for?” I mocked him. A smirk appeared,

“Nothing, just wanted to show some affection~” We both laughed, but we were interrupted by the loud crow that had stopped by,

“A mission for you, a mission for you! Upper moon two spotted! Upper moon two spotted!” The crow told us the location and we got ready to leave.

“Isn’t the upper moon two really powerful?” I asked as we continued to walk to the destination. Obanai nodded as he turned to face me,

“Mm.” He held both my hands, stopping me in my track. 

“Yeah?” Our foreheads touched as he closed his eyes,

“I love you.” Heat rushed to my face as i gasped. Looking away nervously to the side, i responded,

“I love you too, Obanai.” He pressed his lips against mine as if to seal our words with a kiss.

“Alright, let’s go.” He didn’t let go of my hand, holding onto me tightly as if i will go away. I held back just as tight, finding comfort in the tight grasp.

-------------------------------

“Agh...!” I gripped onto my bleeding side, trying to stop the blood from flowing. 

“Haaahhhh! What a miraculous sight!!!!” cried a psychotic voice. I bit my lip, looking over at Obanai. He wasn’t doing any better than i was. We didn’t expect the upper moon two to have another upper moon with him.

“You all die today!” I was too exhausted that i was slow to react to the blade about to pierce me. I closed my eyes, the pain spreading throughout my whole body, but the cut didn’t go through all of me. A warm body covered mine... No... My eyes snapped open, Obanai looked at me with a look of sorrow, his arms encircling me,

“Ah, sorry... I knew i shouldn’t have brought you into this mission... Because of me you’re going to die...” 

Using the last ounce of energy i had, i placed my hand against his cheek,

“No. I’d rather die than live with the pain of not being able to be with you... I love you, Obanai.” Blood seeped out of our mouths, the blade getting pulled out of us and we collapsed onto the snow.

Obanai rolled over to my side, his fingers still interlocked with mine, not willing to let go. Voices could be heard in the distance and the demons decided to retreat before they get into more trouble.

“(y/n)... I love you too. I want to be with you. In the next life and the rest, if only fate could allow it.” My eyes watered as our body slowly grew cold, and we fell into a never ending sleep.

--------------------------------

Beep... Beep... Beep...

I stirred slightly, my hand reaching over to press the snooze button. I covered my eyes with my arm, not wanting to get up. What dream did i just have? i don’t remember but it felt like a long one.

Lazily getting out of bed, i went through my daily routine, getting ready to start the day. A ring on the doorbell caught my attention and i hopped towards the door to get it opened. 

Upon opening the door, i came face to face with a very familiar face, but i can’t place where i had seen it before.

“Here’s your delivery.” I received the parcel with a smile,

“Thank you very much... Also... Do i know you from somewhere?” Said male jumped slightly, a small genuine smile gracing his features,

“Do you?”

[geralt-of-baevia]

Welcome Home

Summary: Henry comes home after being away for a couple months and you two quickly make up for lost time. 

Pairing: Henry Cavill x Reader

Word count: 4.1k

Warnings: SMUT. There’s literally like 1% plot to this. Rough sex, fingering, grinding, oral (m&f receiving), switch!Henry, unprotected sex, choking, orgasm denial, and I think that’s it?

A/N: Hey, y’all! So, I’ve had REALLY bad writer’s block the last week and half and finishing this has helped that flow! If you’ve sent me a request, I promise I’ve seen it and I’ll get to it soon! But I had started this one a long time ago and decided it needed finished! Also this is my first thing I’ve ever written in 2nd person so be kind! 😂😝

Also thank you to @princess-of-riviaa​ for lightly beta-ing this and giving me the confidence to post!

Tag list: @fishcustardandclintbarton​​ @the-soot-sprite​ @henrythickcavill @contentobsessor @iloveyouyen​ @promptandpros​ @sycochick​ @flouncingxtart​ @badoopwoop​ @carlya65 @badoopwoop @yespolkadotkitty​ @vania-marie​ @aaescritora​ @alyxkbrl​ @magdelen69​ @summersong69​ @kevia1000 @princess-of-riviaa​ @agniavateira​ @jolly-polly​ @cherrybloomn​ @madbaddic7ed​ @adorkabeezle​ @tumblnewby @mary-ann84​ (I know this is my tag list for Happenstance, but I figured I’d tag you all here. Some of you asked just specifically for that fic, so if you ONLY want to be tagged in that please DM me and let me know!) 

Henry was coming home today. He was coming home today. You hadn’t seen him in two months and it was driving you crazy. Not only did you miss seeing him and being with him on a daily basis, but you missed his touch. It might seem silly missing something like that, but you couldn’t help it. You missed cuddling with him in bed on cold mornings, the way he rubbed his calloused thumb over the back of your hand when he held it in his, his body hotly pressed between your legs at night. 

 You two FaceTimed every morning and texted all throughout the day, but it just wasn’t enough. The bed always felt empty and colder, his side of the bed vacant of his tall frame. You were happy that you could sprawl out on the bed for once, but you’d much rather have him there beside you. 

You were in the living room reading by the window when you heard the doorknob begin to jiggle. Your heart started beating quickly, your stomach jumping up into your chest. You watched anxiously as he opened the door. Once the door was closed behind him you jumped to your feet and ecstatically ran towards him. 

Right after he dropped his bags and kicked his shoes off, you jumped up and wrapped your arms around his neck, your legs wrapping around his middle. He chuckled as he wrapped his arms around your middle and gave you a tight squeeze. 

“Well, hello darling,” he said through a wide almost goofy smile.

“Oh, Henry I missed you so much,” you said, muffled into the crook of his neck. He squeezed you a little tighter, breathing you in. You could feel your body melt against his.  

“I missed you, too, baby,” he said. You lifted your head to look at him and gave him a hard kiss on the lips. He kissed back just as hard. You sighed against his lips, gasping as he began trailing kissing down your jaw and onto your neck. This wasn’t what you were expecting to happen the moment he walked through the door, but you weren't complaining either. 

“Henry...” you breathed out. You gasp again as he nips at your collarbone, causing shivers to race down your arms. He moved his hands from under your thighs to under your ass, grazing your center with his fingertips through your leggings as he did so. You groaned, digging your fingertips into his skin.

As he kissed his way back up your neck to your lips, you moved your hands to grip at his shoulders. They felt so toned under his shirt. That was one and only thing you loved about him being gone for shooting, he always came back with a little extra muscle.

“Fuck, I’ve missed you,” he said before urgently reattaching his lips to yours. He grabbed at your ass hard, moaning against your lips as he did so. 

Suddenly Henry turned you around and had you pinned up against the door. He bit at your bottom lip, grazing it with his teeth. You moaned as he kissed you hard again, this time swiping his tongue along your lower lip with his tongue. He deepened the kiss and began massaging your tongue slow and sensual with his. 

The two of you began grabbing and touching each other everywhere you could reach. The two months of want and need that had built up were finally coming to fruition. You wanted to touch every part of him. Soak in his touch, the feel of his skin, even the smell of him. You couldn’t get enough of him on a normal occasion, but after so long without him you were really taking it in. 

You gripped your legs tighter around his middle, feeling how he was already hard through his jeans. He groaned into your mouth and began grinding up against you. You pull back from the kiss and throw your head back with a moan. 

“Henry, I need more,” you mumbled out. 

“Yeah?” he asked, a devilish tone to his voice. 

“Yes, please,” you say before leaning in to kiss and nip at his neck.

 Henry grabs your hips roughly and adjusts you so his thigh is between your legs. You could feel his hard-on trapped in his jeans press against your thigh. You groan at him, and you’re slightly taken aback when he put one of his hands around your throat. 

Your breathing hitches slightly as he tightens his grasp, pushing you against the door and holding you there. He was holding in away that you could still breathe, but tight enough to let you know he was in charge at the moment. 

You were putty in his hands, and he knew it. 

“Oh, is this not good-” he said as he grinded his thigh up between your legs, not letting go of your throat, “-enough for you?”

You roll your hips forward against his thigh in response, moaning at the friction. He tightened his grip on your neck.

“That’s a good girl, grind on me,” he demands, low and through gritted teeth. You do as you’re told and continue to grind against his toned thigh. 

“Hen-Henry please,” you choke out. He smirks at you, releasing his grip on your neck. You take in a deep breath. 

“Please what?” he asked, “what do you want me to do?” 

You swallow hard. “I want you to fuck me, please. Please fuck me, babe.”

Without another word, Henry turns you around and starts heading for the bedroom. After you made it through the doorway and to your bed he lowers you back onto the mattress. 

As soon as you were safely on the bed, you watch as Henry moved his hands to the top of your jeans, hastily undoing the button and the zipper. Once they were undone he hooked his hands on either side of your jeans and underwear and pulled them down and off of you, throwing them somewhere to his side. You sit up and rip your shirt off before attaching yourself to him. You just wanted to feel as much of his skin against you as you could. 

“Hen, I’ve missed you so much babe,” you mumble against his skin. He reattached his lips to your neck and began kissing and nibbling at your skin. 

“God, I’ve missed you, too,” he replied. You felt as he reached around you and began undoing your bra hurriedly. 

The moment your bra is stripped from your body his hands and mouth are on your breasts. His mouth sucking and biting at your left nipple, his rough fingertips playing with the other one. You grab a fistful of the back of his curls, pulling lightly and causing him to moan against you. You were so preoccupied with the attention he was paying to your nipples that you didn’t even realize his free hand had made its way down in between your legs. 

A breath hitched in your throat as his fingers slid down in between your slit, his calloused fingertips lightly brushing against your clit. Henry kisses his way from your breast up and chest and neck to your ear. 

“We’re just going to have to get you nice and wet for me, aren’t we sweetheart?” he whispered into your ear, sending chills down your body.

 It usually took you a while to get wet where you two could further things, which you had always been self-conscious about before Henry; but he loved it. He told you he loved getting to play with you and make you ready for him, no matter how long it took.

You nodded at his words. “Yes, please.” 

“Yes, what?” he asked, licking at the spot right below your ear and sending even more shivers down your spine. 

“Yes sir,” you mumbled out. He groaned out a low sigh, running his fingers now back up between your folds. You shuddered as he brushed against your clit again. 

“That’s a good girl,” he praised. 

Henry began kissing his way down your neck, nipping a little harder now at your skin. He kissed and nipped at your collarbone, causing you to let out a shudder. You lean back on your elbows and watch as he trails kisses lower and lower down your body. As he made it to below your navel he spread your legs out, giving him more room to make his descent. He stopped at your hips, giving each hip bone rough kisses. 

You make eye contact as he spreads your legs out wider and lowered himself down to kneel on the floor. He reached his hands under your legs and up around the outside, his fingertips digging into your inner thighs as he spread them further apart. You let out an impatient sigh as he begins kissing from your knee down to your pelvis, a devilish grin flashing on his lips. Right as he was about to kiss your center he switched to the other knee and kissed his way back down to your pelvis again. You groaned at the denial of pleasure. 

Henry moved his hands from your thighs down to your slit, leaning forward towards it. You groaned again as he spread open slickening folds, exposing even more of yourself to him. He blew softly on your clit, the contrast of cold air against your heated core causing you to let out a soft moan.  You close your eyes and throw your head back as his warm tongue licks it’s way from your opening slowly up to your clit. A loud moan escapes your lips as his tongue rolls back and forth against your bundle of nerves. It felt like ecstasy was racing through your veins as he continued. 

You groan as he pulls his mouth away from you. 

“Fuck, you taste so good,” he said fervently. You sighed at his words, the heat at your center slowly growing warmer. Henry puts his hands on your hips and pulls you down the bed so that your ass is just at the edge. He moves his hands to the crook of your knees and pushes them up and out, spreading you out again in the process. Instead of teasing, this time he finds your clit as quickly as he could with his tongue. 

“God, that feels incredible,” you moan to him. The moment after you spoke he began sucking at your clit causing another loud, uncontrollable moan to escape you. You grab at the sheets around you, needing something to hold onto as bliss takes over your body.

You look down as he pulled away again, watching as he let your left leg down and rested your foot on the bed. He put his middle and ring finger in his mouth, sucking and licking them to make them wet. A shudder ran through your body at the sight. 

He brings those two fingers up to your clit, rubbing it tenderly before sliding them down to your opening. Without any hesitation, he slides his fingers inside of you, and you let out a low moan as he continues filling you up. You shiver as his fingers finally made their way to knuckle deep in you. He pulled back out slowly before pushing back into you.

He lets out a pleased ‘hmm’ as he begins pumping his fingers in and out of you at a steady pace. You could feel that he was having an easier time gliding in and out of you, meaning you were wet and ready for him. 

It didn’t matter how many times you had sex, he always seemed so proud of himself that he could get you turned on and make you wet. You didn’t understand why, but you weren’t complaining either. You were the one who got to enjoy it. 

As he continued to fuck you with his fingers he reattached his mouth to your clit. 

“Oh my god, Henry...Henry,” you murmured out. Soon you could feel the space between your legs overwhelm with heat and the promise of climax, it spreading throughout your entire body. 

“Henry, Henry I’m getting close, baby,” you mewled at him. He continued for a few seconds, but as you were about to cum he stopped, pulling both his hand and mouth away from you. A cry that was a mixture of frustration and want came out of your mouth without warning. 

“Have I told you recently that you’re a dick?” you ask him through gritted teeth. He raises an eyebrow at you as he puts the two fingers that were inside of you in his mouth again. This time he licked and sucked on them to get all of you off of him, moaning lightly as he did so. 

“And have I told you recently just how much I love eating you out?” he muses, licking his fingers more. You groaned out again. 

You didn’t know why you expected anything different. He was always such a tease, getting off on getting you close, and then not giving you the gratification you so desperately craved. You sat up, grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him in closer to you. If he was going to tease you, it was only fair that you got to do the same to him.

“You know, you’re wearing too many clothes,” you told him. He raised his eyebrows at you. 

“Is that so?” 

You put your hands on the hem of his shirt and pulled up. He lifts his arms up so that you could pull it up over his head before discarding it to the side. It took everything you had to not instantly attach yourself to his bare torso with your own. Instead, you let your fingertips trace the light outlines of muscles on his torso, running your fingers through the dark hair on his chest. He shivered as goosebumps raised on his skin from your touch. 

“Is that better?” he asks, watching your hands move along his body. You shake your head. 

“No, you’re still wearing far too much,” you tell him, a playful grin forming on your lips. 

You move your hands down to the front of his jeans and begin to unbutton them. He stood up as you began to pull down on his zipper, making it easier for you to get his pants off. You tugged down on them, pulling them down and pushing them to the floor. 

You palmed his erection through the fabric of his boxer briefs, causing a sigh to escape his lips. As you continued, he looked down at you. He grazed his top teeth over his bottom lip with a muffled moan. 

“God, please touch me,” he breathed out. You smirked up at him.

“But baby, I am touching you,” you tell him as innocently as possible. As you continued palming him through the fabric, you lean forward and place light and tender kisses on each of the indents on his hips, a part of him that made you absolutely swoon. He groaned and you could feel his eyes on you. 

“Baby, please touch my cock,” he pleads, impatience in his tone. You hook your pointer fingers on the waistband of his underwear at each hip and begin to pull them down at a painfully slow rate. 

You watch as the elastic band hooked on his cock before it popped out from behind the fabric. An accidental gasp left your mouth at the sight of his arousal in front of you. You pushed his underwear down to meet his pants on the floor.

You look up to see he had been watching you the whole time, hunger in his eyes. You turned your gaze from his and place your attention back to his cock in front of you. Lightly, you run the tip of your pointer finger along the bottom of his cock, pressing against his slightly throbbing vein. He shuttered out a breath, his hand finding your cheek lovingly. 

You lean forward and, without touching his shaft, give the head of his cock a soft kiss. His breathing starts to get heavy as you kiss your way down to the base of his shaft. 

“Babe- baby please, please-” 

“Please what?” you asked him, using his own words against him now. You kiss the base of his cock, looking up at him along his shaft. 

“I need my cock in your mouth, please. Please,” he tells you with a sense of urgency. You grin up at him. Maybe you could understand why he was proud of himself for turning you on. You loved that you were the one who made him this hard, who made him plead. 

Without a word or response to him, you grab his shaft with one of your hands and take his cock into your mouth and begin bobbing your hand and mouth up and down his erection in sync. He let out a jagged moan, causing a spark to light up between your legs. 

His hands find your hair, his grip getting tighter the deeper you took him in. You could tell he was restraining himself from holding onto the back of your head and fucking your mouth, making you choke and gag on him. You move your mouth to cover just the tip of his cock and begin swirling your tongue around it while pumping his shaft with your hand. A loud moan came out of him as you do so. 

You remove your mouth from his cock and replace it with your other hand. They moved with ease after his shaft was wetted by your mouth. When you looked up at him you saw that he was already looking down at you, raw lust in his eyes. 

“God, I love watching you do that,” he said, biting at his lower lip. 

“Yeah?”

“Mmhmm. But there’s something else I’d much rather be watching,” he said. You knit your brow at him. 

“And what is that?” you asked. You lean forward and give the head of his cock another kiss. Henry moves his hands from your hair and leans down to grab your arms and lifts you up to stand, causing you to begrudgingly let go of him. 

He leans down and kisses you passionately. One of his hands moved to cradle your face at your jawline, the other down to your ass where he roughly grabs a handful of your right cheek. You moan into the kiss as his hand continues to grab and reach lower and lower towards your dripping wet cunt. He sighs pleasantly once his fingers reach, dipping them in just enough to drive you crazy. 

He breaks his lips from yours and rests his forehead against your own. “Turn around and get on your hands and knees on the bed. Now.”

You nod and do as he says, turning away from him and climbing onto the bed. You get onto your knees before leaning forward onto your hands and then lower to your elbows, knowing the angle would give him better access to whatever he was going to do. There was a long pause after you get into position, and then you hear a soft thud. You assumed it was probably him removing the clothes around his ankles and tossing them aside.

“Spread your legs out,” he orders. As you move your knees apart you feel his hands rub softly over the curves of your ass. “More.” 

You shuddered slightly at his demanding voice and again do as you're told. He rubs his hands from your ass down to the small of you back, grabbing you on either side and pushing your upper body closer to the bed, forcing your back to arch more. It also made it so you were completely spread out and exposed to him. 

A gasp escapes your lips as you feel him begin trailing kisses over your ass cheeks and down each of your thighs. You were surprised when you felt him place both hands on either side of your slit and spread it open, blowing cold air up and down your folds again. How wet you were made the cool air feel extra cold and sent shivers across my body. 

“God, I fucking love your pussy,” he murmured before the sudden and much-appreciated contact of his mouth on your clit, burying his mouth and nose in your folds. But he’s done too soon for your liking, a whimper coming out of you as he pulls away. 

“Don’t worry darling, you’re going to like what I’m about to give you,” he tells you through what you can tell is a smirk. Before you have time to retort you feel the head of his cock slide up and down your glistening folds. You’re breathing hitches in your throat as he pushes himself into your tight pussy, filling you up. 

You cry out as he does, moaning his name. It had been so long since he had been inside of you and your walls have to adjust to him; he was much bigger than the toys you had used in his absence. He only fills you up about halfway before pulling out and pushing back in again. This time he fills you up all the way, his hips pressing against your ass. 

“Fuck baby girl, you feel so good,” he says in a moan as he grabs your hips. He begins to thrust into you, picking up speed as he goes. You bury your face into your bedspread, it muffling your moans and cries of pleasure. You feel Henry’s hand glide it’s way up your spine before grabbing a fistful of your hair and pulling you back so that your back is against his chest. 

“If you’re going to moan out because of me, I want to hear it,” he grits through his teeth. He trusts into you hard, causing you to moan out into the room. “That’s a good girl.”

“Fuck, I’ve missed you Hen,” you manage out through ragged breaths. 

“I’ve missed you, too, baby girl.” 

“H-Henry I’m starting to get close,” you mewl out as you feel the familiar fire begin to spread throughout your body. 

“I am too, fuck,’ he breathes out, “wh-where are the condoms?”

“I want you to come inside of me...without one.”

Henry stops his movements for a moment before turning you around to face him, holding you in his arms. “...but babe you’re-”

“I started the pill while you were gone,” you say, looking up at him through your eyelashes, scanning his face to try and see what he was thinking, “I want to feel all of you when you come inside of me.”

Before you can say anymore Henry has your mouth captured in a deep kiss, pulling you close against him. “You want me to come inside of you, darling?”

You nod as he trails kisses down your neck. “Yes Henry, please. I want to feel you fill me up.”

He pushes you back onto the bed and leads you to move back until your head hits the pillow. You spread your legs so he can position himself better over you, kissing and nipping at any skin he can reach. He lines up the head of his cock with your entrance and without any hesitation plunges deep into your wet pussy, hitting all the right spots at this angle. As Henry begins rocking his hips against yours you feel the fire in your core begin to build again, your breathing becoming shallow. Henry can tell you’re close and quickens his pace.

“Come on baby, come for me,” he grunts at you between thrusts, egging you on,  “come around my cock. I want to come inside you baby, I want to fill you up with my-”

Before he can finish you peak, your body beginning to shake as pleasure spreads throughout every ounce of your body. Your orgasm is the strongest it’s been since you saw him last, making you see stars. Henry’s thrusts only get stronger as he fucks you through your orgasm, coaxing out his own. 

You shudder again as you feel him come inside of you, his thick seed coating your walls. Your body convulses again as you feel his cock throb inside your aching pussy. Sex with a condom had never felt like this, and now you understand what the hype has always been. 

Henry leans down and kisses you sweetly on the mouth and rests his forehead against yours. A tired smile plays on your lips as you try to regulate your breathing. 

“Fuck, I missed you.”

[insomnihan]

han’s Entire Thoughts & Feelings on Dreamcatcher’s “BEcause”

WE ARE F UCKING UNDER ATTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

there are no read mores here so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ALRIGHT SO-

THE SONG WHERE DO I START WELL- I SAW A COMMENT SOMEWHERE THAT WAS LIKE ‘THIS HAS GOODNIGHT CREEPINESS WITH RED SUN ESSENCE’ WHOEVER THAT WAS YOUR BRAIN IS GINORMOUS™ AND WRINKLY- IF YOU LISTEN TO IT THE SLIGHT SUMMER VIBE IS TOTALLY THERE YET THE PIANO AND THE HARP (MAYBE I DUNNO BUT WHAT I DOONO IS THAT IT SLAPS) THE PRE CHORUS BUILD UP FAST AS HELL THE DRUMS ARE FAST AS S HIT THE CLOCK IS SO CREEPY THE GUITAR IS JUST ASDFFJGHLHKL;;’ THE DOUBLE TIME DURING DAMIS RAP THAT WAS LITERALLY™ AN ATTEMPT TO TAKE MY LIFE (they were this 👌 close istg) AND THEN THE BRDIGE…………………… SOMEONE TAKE THE WHEEL-

AND THEN THEIR VOICES POWERFUL AS ALWAYS AND THAT F UCKING DISTORTION S HIT DURING ‘FOREVER LOVE AND FOREVER MINE’ IS ACTUAL DR*GS- i dunno what it is but the instrumental being like that and then (to me anyway) theres such a sweet undertone (???) in how they sing and then knowing the lyrics likE I KNOW THEYRE OBSESSED- B O I DO I MISS A FAST DAMI RAP P L E A S E I FEEL LIKE SHES THREATENING ME I LOVE THAT PSYCHO NOISE B ICYJ- THAT BRIDGE IS F UCKING CRAZY SIYEONS AND HANDONGS AND YOOHYEONS GENTLE VOICES AND THEN S U A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUREALLYGOTTACOMEOUTOFTHELEFTGODDAMNFIELDWITHTHATICANTSTANDYOUHOWDAREYOUJUSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hello hello for the dance section i will be using THE mcountdown performance yEAH THE ONE POSTED BEFORE THE ACTUAL MV/ALBUM DROP- FIRST OF ALL THE INTRO sorry i have to talk about this theyre so creepy and doll like and jiu is so menacing lIKE WHAT THE F UCK IS THAT (someone answer me what iN THE F CUK did she feed yoohyeon)- NOW ANYWAY I HAVE THINGS TO SAY ABOUT THE ACTUAL DANCE-

OFF THE BAT THE MIRROR INTRODUCTION IS *CHEFS KISS* and then gahyeon choking jiu?????????? LORE????????? IN CHOREOGRAPHY?????????

LISTEN. L I S T E N. ALL OF THEM LIFTING YOOHYEON AT 1:29 LIKE THATS INSANE AND SO FITTING FOR THIS SONG AND VIBE plus yknow………………… handong doing a lot of the lifting………… 👉👈

this specific video doesnt show it during suas verse (which is like Rude™ but fine they show it elsewhere obv) but when shes singing and the rest of them are dropping down slowly………………… yeah-

THE CHORUS EVERY👏SINGLE👏F UCKING👏TIME👏 LIKE THE POSE THEY DO FOR ‘BE’?????????????? THE POWER AND THE GENIUS™ OF IT??????????????????????

DAMI UNHAND ME UNHOLY DEMON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the bridge…………… the rocking from side to side…………… whatever the f uck handong and yoohyeon are doing…………… it was almost like sua was controlling everyone right like deadass im scared-

THE DANCE BREAK PLS LET ME BREATHE

the ending with everyone bowing but gahyeon…………

BICTH……………… BICHY- THE VISUALS JUST KEEP LEVELING THE F UCK UP THATS LIT RALLY INSANE I LOVE THAT FOR THEM- the moment that mystery code was revealed and we were getting demented creepy carnival i waS V I B R A T I N G™ WITH EXCITEMENT the creepy scenery of the  dark hotel lobby and the rundown carnival with the merry go round and teacups AND WITH A CULT and the hallway with the mirrors and the lights (like the use of SO much red and green……… the symbolism………) JUST EVERYTHING IS SO F UCKING ABANDONED AND S HIT- THE LITERAL MIRRORING AND DIMENSION S HIT WHAT THE F UCK!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT CREEPY ASS ROOM WHERE THEY KIDNAPPED GAHYEON IN AND SIYEON WAS ACTING ALL TWITCHY OR WHATEVER WHAT WAS THAT-

TIME TO SHOW WHICH SCENES I LIKED

THE WHOLE GODDAMN THI-

(jk ☺️)

OFF THE BAT GAHYEON MAIN CHARACTER I KNOW THATS RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

…………………… i just wanted to put this here-

i just wanted to put this here too-

HOW DID YOU EVEN GET HERE

id like to think that the real handong is one getting dragged away and the one standing is the doppelganger (for Plot™ purposes)

W H A T T H E F U C K

I DUNNO WHAT TO SAY OTHER THAN IM SCARED-

G OD WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE THIS PART WAS SO WEIRD WHAT DOES THIS MEAN WHAT DOES IT MEAN

HELLO??????????????????

yeah sure let me take this apple from this broken mirror where another me lies within the walls of this creepy hotel anD EAT IT

W E L P-

………………………………… F-

T H E M

I DUNNO HOW IM BREATHING RN-

JIU

whaT IN THE F UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS SCENE IN THIS SCREENSHOT IS ALREADY A LOT the way she looks seemingly unassuming and harmless in that reception desk that brown and white outfit (is her hair in like………… pigtails???) and then the smile to the instant glare you jusT KNOW youre gonna d*e in that place- MAAAAN BANGS OR NO BANGS SHES STUNNING EITHER WAY AND THATS SO RUDE………… the white dress and those red ACTUAL TALONS will be the d*ath of me

SUA

if i counted correctly she had three (3) different outfits??? outside of the dance ones??? white and red then black and purple then that green and black one??? i think of all of those i really like the red and the green one theres SOMETHING ABOUT THEM i think the green one with the big puffy sleeves more NOT BC ITS MY FAVORITE COLOR I SWEAR the green looks silky and then she also has the thing on the side of her face the pearls in her hair- AND THEN THAT RED ONE with the white sleeves and the frilly collar dude whAT THE F UCK LIKE I KNOW WE SAW IT A LOT BUT I WANNA SEE MORE THO……………

SIYEON

OKAYOKAYOKAY LOOK- THIS OUTFIT IN THIS SCREENSHOT I FEEL LIKE I SHOULDNT LIKE IT YET I DO????????????? two completely different looking patterns that animal print and the strips and then that big ass belt (???) around her waist like this shouldnt be like a GOOD look i dont think……… truly only She™ could make this look work 😔😔😔 i got A LOT A LOT to say about the red and orange plaid crop top and skirt with the different colored clips in her head but the only thought going through my Dumb of Ass Stupid Brain™ iS HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

HANDONG

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY NATURAL BLONDE BELOVED this white dress and the BLACK BOOTS AND THE CHOKER SHE BETTER S TOP- AND DO NOT I REPEAT D O N O T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SPEAK TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ON THAT SHORT WHITE DRESS WITH THE WHITE BOOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHOEVER STYLED HER YOU DONT CARE ABOUT ME AND THE OTHER HANDONGISTS YET I ALSO LOVE YOU SO MUCH the one with the pink dress dont talk to me dont approach me donT EVEN F UCKING LOOK AT ME IM GOING THROUGH A LOT RN

YOOHYEON

im really Dumb of Ass™ i thought that one pink and (maybe???) super light blue dress had a clock on it- BUT MOVING ON FROM THAT the space buns and whatever those accessories those are and the pink makeup this is sO- then the white dance outfit with those (mesh??? lace??? i just know that its see through-) sleeves and those big ass earrings THAT LOOK AT 2:24 the boots (yeah i gotta mention that first since i just ALWAYS have to mention them) the white blazer all those pearl long ass necklaces and whatever that is on the side of her face why do her visuals HURT SO BAD-

DAMI

bicth…………………………………… B I C T H- WHAT HAS THIS WOMAN BEEN DOING??????!!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!??!??!?!?! THIS OUTFIT IS SUCH AN ATTACK I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS ON HER FACE THIS WHOLE LOOK IS SOMETHING ELSE™ her tattoo 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵 that bottom part of her hair is kinda clapped tho honestly- the pig tails?????? braids?????? in the dancing part on the black and white tiles IM DOWN YALL IM DOWN SO BAD AND ITS F UCKING RUDE™ THAT WE DONT SEE S HIT OF THAT DRESS AT THE END-

GAHYEON

IM GONNA SAY IT AGAIN LEE👏GAHYEON👏MAIN👏CHARACTER👏I👏KNOW👏THATS👏RIGHT👏👏👏👏👏👏👏!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS RED HAIR IS A BLESSING (especially in that high ponytail i-) SHE IS ATTACKING ME BUT YKNOW WHAT THATS OKAY- im SURE theres a plot significance to her two different dresses the mostly black and the mostly white but my brain can only register WOMAN PRETTY that white one in particular…………… the choker with her hair up and those boots…………… i saw it clear as day and im d wording over it-

BONUS TIME: B-SIDE TRACKS (thoughts and parts i liked)

Intro

i usually expect the intro to be like SUPER HYPE AND INTENSE yknow which it kinda is! however it is consistent that it fits very well and captures the overall vibe of the entire album the calm beginning with the bell like were walking into an establishment and at the halfway point it picks up its intriguing and the ‘i like you’ adds a subtle eeriness that adds just enough to make one wanna continue listening its v good 👌

Airplane

LISTEN……………… LISTEN- this is the VERY LAST genre i expected out of this group YET im not even a little bit shocked that they did this like this cutesy izone-esque summer bop of a song is a DREAMCATCHER™ song……………… YALL- THE AMOUNT OF SEROTONIN THAT ‘AIRPLANE LALALALALALA~~~~~~~’ BRINGS IS SOMETHING SO PERSONAL THIS SECOND GENERATION SUMMERY ASS INSTRUMENTAL WHAT IN THE F UCK- I FEEL LIKE IM RUNNING ON THE BEACH I FEEL THE COLD WIND OF THE WATER BUT THE HEAT OF THE SUN AGAINST MY SKIN AND IM PLAYING WITH A DAMN BEACH BALL WITH A COCONUT DRINK (I F UCKING H*TE LEAVING MY HOUSE) JIU AND DAMI SOUND SO F UCKING PHENOMENAL

Whistle

im pretty firm on believing these b sides represent different times of a summer day and this is the late evening or twilight like not nighttime but CLOSE- i thought i wasnt gonna like the whistling part but that only makes it catchieR THIS SONG IS MAKING ME YEARN AND TRYING TO RECALL LOVELY MEMORIES I DONT EVEN HAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! then again……………… theres always usually a song on their albums that make me unlock and feel hidden emotions………… THIS SONG GOT ME MISSING A PERSON THAT ISNT REAL this is such a mellow yet so powerful in the way they sing and express each syllable- they all did so good on this song but i gotta mention dami again for her part like oH mY gOoOoOooOoOOOooOD

Alldaylong

JIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the way this song was inspired by a hug jiu got from yoohyeon…………… THIS IS NOT A JOKE she said ‘i wanna try city pop’ anD SHE DONE DID IT- i have NO IDEA how this song managed to hold so much joy and light happiness in every word and instrument used in this but im :ccccccc i literally wanna hug someone after listening to this 😔😔😔 this also makes me yearn for something but at least this one isnt unrealistic or unobtainable i dont think! there are some songs out there that make me cry from its lyrics and its sound but THIS ONE the lyrics and just how happy this song is bro reading the lyrics im about to cry for like the fifth time- they who im love so much… :ccccccc doesnt it make you just wanna hug someone and tell them you love them????????? that you appreciate them??????????

해바라기의 마음 (A Heart of Sunflower)

i knew FOR A FACT FOR👏A👏FACT👏 that they were gonna have a ballad for this album bc road to utopia didnt have one i will admit i was one of the 🤡 that thought jiu would be credited on this song 😬😬😬 ANYWAY- AGAIN WITH THE DAMN YEARNING FOR SOMETHING BUT THIS TIME IM F UCKING SAD AS S HIT why must this song be so powerful to make me emotional before i even got to read the lyrics to fully grasp it……………………… now im truly yearning in the Sad™ way and waiting for some imaginary person who i dont even know will even come back…………………… those damn adlibs are pretty as hell it was sua (and i have to mention dami again okay shes really killing it on this she woNT LET ME LIVE-) who got me feeling this the most like yeah…………………… i am a fool…………… im a fool for loving and missing someone who just disappeared from my lifE G O D D A M N IT-

LIKE this is COMPLETELY surprising album BUT IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE as its described it really is a ‘special’ album as while the title track still has their music style and sound theres still an element of summer (a very Terrifying™ summer BUT a ✨Summer✨ album nonetheless) like the b sides are SO different and COMPLETELY caught me off guard when i listened to the highlight medley YET this group of seven amazing and talented women pulled it off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! its extremely obvious at this point that their steady and organic growth has grown VERY HIGH this time and (although im still very confused by how everything was released and announced BUT i digress) this different kind of method in performing the song the day before seemed to work?????????? I DUNNO WHAT TO SAY ANYMORE this section could literally be summed to just I LOVE DREAMCATCHER SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

IN CONCLUSION: LISTEN TO THIS ALBUM BECAUSE ITS BOMB AS F UCK

AND AS ALWAYS

[bigskydreaming]

Okay, so its no secret that I detest fandom’s obsession with Dick’s temper and how its one of his biggest character flaws, and that I looooooooooathe how much people fixate on that fight with Donna in NTT, but I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen anyone post the FULL scene with Dick and Donna rather than just selectively pull the panels in which Dick makes Donna cry, so I’ve included them all here so people can decide for themselves.

And keep in mind, as the last page I’ve included shows (with it taking place a mere THREE issues after this Dick and Donna fight)....Dick was quite literally NOT IN HIS RIGHT MIND at the time. This was a PLOT point, NOT a CHARACTERIZATION. The entire ‘road’ to this storyline was Dick deliberately and consciously being written as being more and more OUT of character, to SHOW that something was literally wrong with him. 

This includes his reaction to Kory when she got married on Tamaran - literally the issue BEFORE this fight with Donna, his abrasive attitude to Alfred when he visits Bruce, Alfred and Jason at Wayne Manor briefly upon returning to Earth, and this fight itself.

And lol, all anyone around him wanted to do was talk about how he needed ‘tough love’ from them and to be lectured on everything he was doing wrong rather than a SINGLE ONE OF THEM bothering to ask themselves - let alone him - WHY he was behaving so erratically and again, LITERALLY out of character. Why, no matter what personal problems he was having, they were having him react THIS way, lashing out at everyone around him, when Dick has ALWAYS had a lot of personal shit going on and yet this is absolutely NOT his standard, in character way of USUALLY dealing with that.....

Despite people both deliberately and unknowingly calling back to stories whose entire POINT is showing this behavior as out of character....

And using it to describe THAT VERY BEHAVIOR as being IN character.

So, please read these pages with that context in mind, keeping a firm awareness of the fact that Dick is literally battling mental conditioning he’s unaware of through all of this, while Donna on the other hand is NOT. And has NO excuse for the things she says and DOES.....

And yet, this fight only EVER comes up in demonstration of DICK’S temper and how its this great character flaw of his, and NEVER to say, DONNA has a temper and this is one of her character flaws.

Please ask yourselves why the fuck a fandom has spent thirty years since this issue framing this fight as Dick’s fault, proof of how cruel and awful HE can be, instead of....how even his closest friends are TYPICALLY characterized as having no patience with him when he’s acting out of character....even when there might very well be - and usually IS - a REASON he’s acting out of character, beyond ‘he’s going through some shit.’

And ESPECIALLY ask yourselves why the hell this fight comes up so often with it being cited - and panels provided as proof - that Dick makes Donna cry with the things he says (again, while brainwashed).....

But with ZERO mention of the facts that:

a) Dick told Donna from the outset that he wasn’t in the mood to have this argument and asked her to leave HIS apartment

b) Donna refused and said they were going to talk about this now whether he liked it or not

c) Donna - a character with super strength - physically manhandled Dick into staying put when Dick still insisted he didn’t want to do this now

d) Dick AGAIN makes the effort to de-escalate or break off the argument because he knows or feels strongly its going to get even LESS civil than it already has been, given the mood he is (and not knowing that this mood is again, at least partly due to turmoil from constantly fighting against brainwashing he himself isn’t even aware of)

e) When Donna STILL refuses to do him the COURTESY of listening to his repeated efforts to NOT DO THIS RIGHT NOW, Dick tries to go past her and leave his OWN apartment just to get away from her

f) Donna STILL refuses to allow this, physically shoving him back again to keep him from going anywhere until SHE’S good and ready for him to

g) only THEN does Dick go on the offensive (but also kinda the defensive, if you consider the fact that he’s repeatedly expressed HE DOESN’T WANT TO BE HERE OR DO THIS WITH HER and has tried more than once to get her to go or remove HIMSELF from the situation)....and its only at THIS point that Dick says the admittedly cruel things that make Donna cry and are the source of the ONLY panels from this whooooooole scene that I’ve ever seen provided in posts about how this demonstrates Dick’s temper

h) Donna - far from being a helpless victim of Dick’s cruel temper, the way its usually framed - responds with her OWN offensive, not just in the form of words, but - and I can not express enough how fucking uncomfortable it makes me that Dick is so often framed as the aggressor here, the one with the temper, the one OUT OF LINE when this happens in the same scene - Donna responds to what Dick says by LITERALLY PUNCHING HIM THROUGH A WALL

i) Donna then REMAINS just as much on the offensive as Dick himself, but whereas Dick’s offensive is in the form of words he’s saying to Donna - after being pushed and provoked despite repeated attempts of his to de-escalate or disengage (and again, WHILE brainwashed) - Donna’s offensive remains in the form of PHYSICAL AGGRESSION, as she repeatedly tries to attack HER FRIEND with her super strength, clearly not holding back as we see her demolishing the parts of HIS apartment her attacks actually connect with

j) Despite Donna changing the nature of their conflict from being just about words to being one of outright physical aggression - well not really changing, if you keep in mind the fact that Donna used physicality to force Dick to remain in the apartment long before they reached this point to begin with - Dick STILL makes ZERO effort to respond with any physical aggression of his own, despite her having ALL the advantages in a straight up physical conflict between them, and the fact that even ONE of those hits from her is going to do FAR more damage to him if it connects than ANYTHING he could do to her ever would, and instead, Dick remains committed to simply EVADING her physical attacks while doing zero to reciprocate with anything other than words

k) the conflict only concludes when Dick FINALLY - and despite Donna’s repeated and continued efforts - manages to get out of his OWN apartment and leave just to get away from her - as he was trying to do ALL ALONG

l) in the aftermath of the conflict, we only see Donna sitting on the floor of his demolished apartment, clearly upset but with no indication if that has ANYTHING to do with anything SHE actually did throughout it or if she’s still only focused on what he said to HER, whereas we’re treated to a full internal monologue from Dick where he’s clearly confused and upset with his OWN behavior and trying to justify it and make sense of it even just to himself, which again, plays right into the fact that from here he sets out to find Raven, which leads him straight into the clutches of the Church of Blood as it turned out he wasn’t sneaking in but rather being lured back in via....

m) the mental conditioning its revealed Dick’s had implanted thanks to them all along, and the ultimate SOURCE of all his erratic, OUT OF CHARACTER, and volatile behavior over the past year, as he’s been battling against it internally with no idea that’s what he was doing or why he was having dramatic mood swings and shifts in priorities and decision-making

But again.....the only thing that EVER gets mentioned about this entire conflict, and the only pages which are ever posted from it....

Are the ones where Dick makes Donna cry.

So. Yeah. THAT, and the fact that this particular fight is FOUNDATIONAL to the whole “Dick has an awful temper and lashes out at even his closest loved ones at times” characterization that’s influenced not just fandom, but other later writers of canon itself....

All without ZERO mention or awareness of the larger overall framing or even the fact that there were TWO people involved in this fight, but only Dick has the excuse of “I was literally brainwashed at the time tho” for what he says and does and he STILL wasn’t the one who initiated, escalated, repeatedly refused to take what the other wanted into account, and oh yeah, physically attacked him....

Like. This would be why I 100% can not stand talk of Dick’s temper and how its one of his greatest flaws, while literally every single character can be shown to be written as an asshole at times or having a temper when lashing out or hurt - such as say, Donna in this very same scene....

And the much, MUCH more consistent and frequently appearing pattern in canon is NOT Dick being this volatile jerk who often makes his friends and family the victim of his temper....but rather Dick himself is the victim of THEIR tempers and physical aggression, with this repeatedly and consistently glossed over and DELIBERATELY EXCLUDED FROM THE NARRATIVE in order to just focus SOLELY on Dick’s part of a fight and whatever he did or said that was wrong.

Also also also, just to reiterate, like I coincidentally (or is it a coincidence) have to keep doing with the Ric Grayson arc to get people to remember to be sympathetic to how DICK is affected by all this rather than how he’s VICTIMIZING his loved ones through all this, ALMOST FORTY YEARS AFTER THIS SCENE (lol my how things have changed).....

OH YEAH. AND HE WAS BRAINWASHED THOUGH.

Anyway, the pages in FULL, below the cut:

Skipping ahead to a mere THREE ISSUES LATER and the brainwashing reveal:

[kaitosimp]

AHWHAUDHDNA i have more song ideas that i shall enlighten you with

more the crane wives bc i love them... tongues and teeth reminds me of oumota a LOT, “when you come in quick to steal a kiss, my teeth will only cut your lips” referring to how kokichi has distanced himself from everyone on purpose but kaito still wants him,,, the line “i am not a vessel for your good intents” reminds me of their hero/villain dynamic and how kokichi dislikes his heroic attitude, but now that i’m listening to it again it can also sound like kaimaki??

love like you from su reminds me of saimota, especially “i always thought i might be bad, now i’m sure that it’s true/cause i think you’re so good, and i’m nothing like you” referring to how shuichi admires kaito a lot and wants to be like him because being with kaito gives him strength :,)

sweet hibiscus tea by penelope scott reminds me of shuichi SO MUCH... “and i am not your protagonist, i’m not even my own” hit me like a freight train, kinda referring to his reaction to tsumugi telling him that team danganronpa “created” him, but this is a pretty popular shuichi pick so i’m not surprised if you’ve heard it

burning pile gives me kokichi vibes... “throw my troubles at the world again/it goes, all my troubles on a burning pile” referring to how kokichi decides to completely abandon his true self in order for his mastermind plot to work and so he could sacrifice himself to end the killing game

life letters also gives oumota vibes,,, i prefer to listen to the no glitch version but the song is also just so pretty... (keep in mind i don’t actually speak russian so i have to rely on translations 😭) “the average person can tell up to two hundred thousand lies a day/and now i lie, and you will leave me here” GAHDHSHAGD,,, give it a listen it’s awesome

Heck yeah lets go!! 🌚💜💜💜 I only know love like you from a prev ask so like always, im excited to listen to the rest of these 😂

I did not expect my wig to fly the second the lyrics to tongues and teeth began but I was wrong, literally starting off with the "ive grown a mouth so sharp and cruel its all that i can give you" immediately made me think of all the cruel and mean shit Kokichi says to keep the others away, specifically Kaito in this case 👁👄👁 I agree 100% with the 'to steal a kiss' line you mentioned, its rlly how Kokichi kept everyone as far away as he could but Kaito didn't give a fuck 👀 *slaps table* AGAIN, I AGREE WITH THE NEXT LINE "i know you mean well but i am not a vessel for your good intents" IT RLLY REMINDS ME OF KAITO'S HEROIC NATURE AND HIS NEED TO HELP EVERYONE AND KOKICHI HATES THAT- the next part about breaking all the pretty things but the person being fine with that and fine with being theirs is Kokichi being damn well aware he could only just end up hurting Kaito but he knows doesnt care 😔✋🏽 GOD THE REST OF THE SONG IS JUST KOKICHI TRYING TO CONVINCE KAITO AND PROBS HIMSELF THAT IT WONT LAST AND THAT ITS NOT PERMANENT AND THAT ITS NOT LOVE AND HE TRIES TO WARN KAITO BUT KAITO DOESN'T C A R E, AND YEAH I SEE THE UNDERTONES OF KAIMAKI IN THERE TOO

Love like you makes me feel so nice and s o f t, man 😭😭😭😭 Back when i first heard it i thought of it in Kaito's perspective @ Shuichi cause of how he admires Shuichi and his skills and thinks so highly of him even if he doesnt show it but now I also think of it like you said in Shuichi's perspective @ Kaito with how much he also admires him and his charisma and strength and he loves him so much and he doesn't understand how Kaito could think highly of someone like him and just??? Man, I'm in mY FEELS 😭😭😭

I haven't heard the sweet hibiscus tea song before actually! You should know i only came to find out about the existence of the v3 (and the 2nd game) characters back in september and i never interacted with the fandom at all till i made this blog so i never knew it was a popular pick for Shuichi 😂 But you were right, it rlly did remind me of Shuichi! Aside from the obvious bit with the protag which absolutely refers to that last trial where the truth is revealed, it also made me think of Shuichi's self doubt and anxiety and insecurities regarding his usefulness aND IT ALSO REMINDED ME OF AFTER KAEDE DIED AND HOW FED UP HE IS WITH THE KILLING GAME

Can I just say, burning pile made me want to burn something so bad 💀😂 I agree tho! I dunno how to explain but I got Kokichi vibes too, when it said the stuff with "all my troubles on a burning pile all lit up and i start to smile" made me think of him thinking up his plan and him pretending to be enjoying all the shit he has to do (by smiling and pretending to be happy) and "if i catch fire then i'll take my turn to burn and burn and burn" made me think of him planning out the fact that he might die due to his behavior/actions/etc and he'll be ready to "burn" (die) :,)))

I don't know russian either so I had to also rely on translations for life letters, i hadn't realized before but im 99% sure ive heard this in edits before 😂 RIGHT OFF WITH THE TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND LIES AND I WILL LIE AND YOU WILL LEAVE ME BITS I GOT HIT WITH OUMOTA VIBES, THE LEAVING PART MADE ME THINK OF KAITO HAVING TO LEAVE KOKICHI ALONE ON THE PRESS 😭😭😭😭✋🏽 STOP- ITS MAKING ME THINK OF THEM SHARING ONE LAST MOMENT AND ONE LAST KISS BEFORE KOKICHI DIES AND WHEN IT SAYS THEY ONLY HAVE ONE HOUR, CHANGE IT TO KAITO AND KOKICHI ONLY HAVING A FEW MINUTES BEFORE THE PRESS HAS TO COME DOWN BUT ONE OF THEM RLLY WANTS TO SAY GOODBYE PROPERLY SO THEY JUST SPEND A LIL MINUTE THERE TOGETHER, FUCKING HELP

ASDFGHJKL IM SORRY FOR THIS LONG ASS POST, I ALWAYS GET CARRIED AWAY WRITING 💀💀💀

[anestheticrage]

Be me: Japanese honor student🎓, 15, with half a brain and even less of a plan. Hunting bitches by day and witches by night. Livin that dank only child✌️ life while mom n dad yeet all over the globe, leavin me plenty of time to forget not to make 2 lunches for myself #quirky 😜

no time for socialization or basic electronics skills ???📱??? when your best friends are an alien demon rabbit🐰👽 and the inexplicable Hole ™ in your brain. lmao, btw did i mention im ✨M✨A✨G✨I✨C✨A✨L✨

dreamin bout my 2D waifus again when familiar pink haired cancer patient dances through my brain passin out fliers: Kamihama Meguca Dating Service: Sponsored by Cult of the Magius. 250 stones per session 🤔

seems legit, Mr. Moneybags. wasn't spending my unwieldy sack of gemstones on anything else anyway. lets pull 💎💎💎

first up we have Redhead Radagast and her plethora of plants. 🌿☺️🦎

anndd, nearly dies immediately. 

well not off to a great start but i guess shes pretty cute at lea- oh FUCK its her girlfriend, Tsundere Poseidon😒🔱💦, and their exasperated, straight and single Sword Mom 😔🗡️🔥. fml gonna have to save up for the next pull. might as well play a few rounds with what i got tho. 

get in some good girl talk about things like school, color coded hair styles, body count, permanent soul damage, and our personal demon pacts. ya know, the usual 😚 . realize my dark backstory seems to be missing, so the girls take me to Ketchup Queen Sappho 🍅🥧 (wtf?) to molest my glowy egg stone. whatevs, more action than ive had since Kuroe 🖤 got added to the story anyway

the gang agrees it's time to hunt down the cutest rabbit pimp 🕶️🐇💵 in the city. >> say 🎵mukyuuu🎵 one more time and ill hug you so hard my backstory will pop right out, you adorable fluffy bastard. plz be my new best friend 💕

Form brand new friendship pact with Kyubae, and remember that my lil Sis 🐥 was always the best wingman for pickin up magic chicks, and kept her side of the room so spotless i forgot she existed. whoops 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ Maybe if I find her i can stop paying these exorbitant pull fees.📵💎

speaking of which: hot damn this week's featured bachelorette is a 19 year old model and magical detective🔎 with massive levels of PTSD and self loathing 🥵💙💦 more likely to stab you or dramatically jump off a rooftoop than utter a single positive comment. wow, maybe i really COULD find true love…

... if i had MORE THAN A 1% FUCKING DRAW CHANCE. 😡 smh

hard to make much progress finding sis or winning the broken heart of a hard boiled detective amidst the never ending lover's quarrel of the Trident Vine Lesbians. 💔 Sword Mom tells them if they don't behave a monster will take them away. LOL classic mom 🤣

>>>HOLY FUCK IT DID

declare all-out war on urban legends, starting with staircases ⚔️ to reunite the dysfunctional trio, and hope that I net a way better lineup with the next 10x pull. at least sad sleuth lady came to help out. they say combat is the best way to bond wi-   and there she goes off the rooftop again 🙄 fml

alright that got way off track, we need a fresh start, away from all the loli drama. how bout a little B&E🔓🔨🤷🏻‍♀️ at the local house of worship to clear my head. ahh nothing like the unanswered prayers of the masses to get you in the mood for another wasted pull, and the 🔥 MIGHTIEST 🔥 headache you could ask for with a side of Double Cooked Pork 🐖🍜 (meh 5/10🧾)

venture forth into the spiritual unknown with your new human flamethrower🔥🌻🧡 and ask your favorite private eye to please, for the love of Eve, trade Meguca accounts with me~~~ Head through the eastern spirit portal to meet up with hologram propaganda sis and detective crush's evil ex, who joined a dating-app cult (#fuck) and also turned into the moon?🌕?(that's rough buddy)

get ambushed by Acid Horse on Wheels 🌈🐴 and vomit up my soul so hard that its time for a crossover episode. T U R F F F   W A R R R *que operatic harmonies* 💛 Blondie with the hair drills and enough attitude and guns to fill up a noble phantasm tries to ban my account permanently, but PI heartthrob denies her admin privileges. aww babe i didn't know you cared. 😭♥️

get kidnapped by my new true love and go back to her place 😏  defs enough empty rooms to house five emotionally traumatized girls and at least two ghosts hehehe👻 XD 💚🃏💜🎸 decide to form the anti-gossip brigade and recruit my blazing sunflower after getting ambushed by the witch living in my fruit loops🥣

❌outvoted 2:1 that cults are bad. mf. fiinneee one last pull to round out the team and then I'll delete the app. cmonnn Karin 🎃~

OH HELL YEAH TWO FOR ONE.

Always wanted a daughter 💜🔨🐄 with a penchant for pissing off the local Martial Arts & Books Club and drinking suspicious liquids offered by total strangers. Well if it's good enough for her AND the sexy mayadere with enough game to seduce a mermaid, might as well get in on that myself. 

#curseddrank 🤢 0/24 would not recommend to a friend, 'cept maybe Ria

win alot of cash 🤑, blow up a fountain, meet the pied piper²🎶🖕, moon cult, monochrome feathers, something about liberation✊🏻; adopt temper tantrum cow girl. aces 💜🥩

Next up!!! skydiving with DJ Hammer! Jump to apparently-not-certain death after suicidal A.I. 💚💾🗼 tells you to rescue her hostage before they run out of Radiohead albums and have to move on to Thom Yorke's solo discography. save the invisible shield kitten 💚👑😿 from happiness and get chased through the internet by the sexiest homicidal Paint Pallette 💚🎨😈 since Caravaggio. (apparently green is the color of the digital apocalypse. i’m deleting Kako from my friend's list)

that’s it, fuck this app. 250 stones 💎 per-life-threatening-experience is more than i’m willing to deal with 😓 don’t wanna mess with the perfect nuclear family anyway. we've already got: 

✔️the two emotionally traumatized moms with memory and commitment issues

✔️the adhd daughter with anger management problems and a giant hammer

✔️the psychologically abused scizophrenic cat

✔️and the eccentric aunt with crippling anxiety

#squadgoals

now that were done hoarding bitches, its time to hunt the witches. and the bitches makin the witches. btw did i mention the witches ARE the bitches! AND WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!? 📽️⁉️💀 wait fuck lets back up a second

This is Nemo📕 and Token🧪 and they have all the answers but prefer if you only ask vague questions in exchange for vague responses so they can fill in the rest by discussing their superior intellect 🧠 at length. not to mention they built that dating app, so of course everyone in my harem decides to be a FUCKING. TRAITOR.🤬

cept waifu prime ofc 🥰💙. [PTSD > brainwashing] 'yOu CaN bE tHe LeAdEr NoW'. i have been from the very beginning you traumatized Hinedere nightmare. maybe if you weren't so caught up collecting surrogate daughters you would've noticed IM👏THE👏ONLY👏 ONE👏PROGRESSING👏THE FUCKING👏PLOT✨

rescue the rest of dysfunctional found-family™ from selves before my adorable firebender burns down Disnihama🎡🔥😱 during her weekly anxiety attack. (love the makeover T B H) 

CHAPTER 8: Magical Girl Massacre🩸🗡️

   - everyone has like, the shittiest day ever

   - the new Pope really needs to be extradited from the church

   - make friends with a really pretty tree 🌺🌲✨

i swear, if i don't finish this god damn story in time to get that free pull im gonna beat the shit out of every mirror i find in that giant mansion that i haven't even had any time to even mention yet. 🖕🏚️ let alone EVERYTHING happening with the prequel [fuck you, I'm the star] girls 💗💜💙💛❤️️ and their multidimensional melodrama. We don't need that many repetitive af episodes to emphasize that Homo-ra is a shitty person. we've all seen Rebellion. 🙄

NO, I DONT CARE IF YOU WANT SAPPHO'S BACKSTORY, I ONLY HAVE 79 STONES LEFT AND IF YACHAN FINDS OUT I HAVEN'T DELETED THE APP YET IM GONNA HAVE TO GO SLEEP IN WITH SANA 😭💎💸😠

uhhhggggg where were we… Topple a cult and burn down Hotel Denoument only to realize that Sis was fused with the dating app servers this entire madokafuckin time (told ya she was the best wingman 😊). 

Dilemma: Sis =🥚, Triumvirate of Trouble want 🐣. What do? vote now:

Help Hatch - IIIIIII

Not Do That - IIIII

What The Actual Fuck Is Going On - IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Lets just fight everyone until something good happens.

🔥🔫🔥🗡️🔥😱🔥🌆🔥😱🔥🛡️🔥💣🔥

Kill (???) the artist-in-chief of the italian reindeer murder police after teaching her the true meaning of Christmas 🎄 hatch 🐣lil Sis and realize she WAS your wingman all along🐰 MUKYUUUU! we're just gonna ignore how much trouble it would have saved if you'd just mentioned that. "yOu DiDnT aSk..." 

FUCK YOU SPACE BITCH. ONCE AN INCUBATOR ALWAYS AN INCUBATOR 🖕🐇🔪

anywho, somewhere along the lines we of course summoned the Antichrist ⚙️ because why not raise the stakes to max and still not kill off a single character. Madofuckinkami, can we PLEASE wrap this up. 😩💤

feathers (not the culty kind, tfm) rain from the sky, and the power of friendship and not having the Urobutcher 🔪🩸as a lead writer saves our peacefully sectioned off alternate reality 😇

TL:DR fuck cults, real life waifus DO exist, don't sell your soul to space rabbits, or your stones to megacorporations. Enjoy arc 2 on the JP server with your shitty translation patch you filthy fuckin weebs 

Yours Truly, 

- Thirsty Weeb Eroha 💗💎😘 

[beyondtheuniversesstuff]

How to see Uranus in the night sky (without a telescope) this week

NASA's Voyager 2 spacecraft captured this image of the planet Uranus on Dec. 18, 1986. (Image credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech)

Just how many planets are visible without a telescope? Not including our own planet, most people will answer "five" (Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter and Saturn).

Those are the five brightest planets, but in reality, there is a sixth planet that can be glimpsed without the aid of either a telescope or binoculars.

That sixth planet is the planet Uranus. This week will be a fine time to try and seek it out, especially since it is now favorably placed for viewing in our late-evening sky and the bright moon is out of the way.

Related: Photos of Uranus, the tilted giant planet

This sky map shows where Uranus will be located around midnight on Sept. 13-14, as seen from New York City. Look for it in the constellation of Aries, the ram. (Image credit: SkySafari app)

Of course, you'll have to know exactly where to look for it. Astronomers measure the brightness of objects in the night sky as magnitude. Smaller numbers indicate brighter objects, with negative numbers denoting exceptionally bright objects. But Uranus is currently shining at magnitude +5.7, relatively dim on the scale; barely visible by a keen naked eye on very dark, clear nights.

It is currently located within the constellation of Aries, the Ram, about a dozen degrees to the east (left) of the brilliant planet Mars. It's already one-third up from the eastern horizon by 11:30 p.m. local daylight time and will reach its highest point — more than two thirds up from the southern horizon — just before 4 a.m.

It is best to study the accompanying chart first, then scan that region with binoculars. Using a magnification of 150-power with a telescope of at least three-inch aperture, you should be able to resolve it into a tiny, blue-green featureless disk.

An icy, cold world

This week Uranus is about 1.771 billion miles (2.851 billion kilometers) from Earth (only Neptune is farther away). It takes 84.4 years to orbit the sun. The planet has a diameter of about 31,518 miles (50,724 km), making it the third-largest planet, and according to flyby magnetic data from Voyager 2 in 1986, has a rotation period of 17.23 hours.

At last count, Uranus has 27 moons, all in orbits lying in the planet's equator in which there is also a complex of nine narrow, nearly opaque rings, which were discovered in 1978.

Uranus likely has an icy, rocky core, surrounded by a liquid mantle of water, methane and ammonia, encased in an atmosphere of hydrogen and helium. In fact, Uranus has the coldest atmosphere of any planet in the solar system with a minimum temperature

of -371 degrees Fahrenheit (minus 224 degrees Celsius).

A freakish tilt

A bizarre feature is how far over Uranus is tipped. The other planets are tilted somewhere between 3 degrees and 29 degrees, but Uranus' north pole lies 98 degrees from being directly up and down to its orbit plane.

From our point of view, this means that sometimes we see Uranus with its north pole pointing at us. At other times we see it with its equatorial belt oriented vertically instead of horizontally. From the point of view of a hypothetical astronaut visiting Uranus, daylight and darkness would be nothing short of extraordinary. Its seasons are extreme: when the sun rises (as an example) at the north pole, it stays up for 42 Earth years; then it sets and the north pole is in darkness for 42 Earth years.

Accidental discovery

In the late winter of 1781, British astronomer Sir William Herschel had just finished building a new 6.3-inch (16 centimeters) reflecting telescope and began to study the stars through it. On the night of March 13, he had his telescope turned on the constellation of Gemini, the twins. There, to his great surprise, he came across an extra star that was not plotted on any of his star charts. An accomplished astronomer, Herschel was quick to realize that what he found could not possibly be a star, for it appeared in his telescope as a glowing disk as opposed to a twinkling speck of light.

Continuing his observations of this unusual object night after night, Herschel soon perceived movement; it was slowly shifting its position among the background stars of Gemini. Finally, he decided that he had discovered a new comet and he wrote up a detailed report of his observations, which were published on April 26.

The report of a new comet excited astronomers all over Europe, and they all eagerly trained their telescopes on Herschel's discovery. King George III, who loved the sciences, had the astronomer brought to him and presented him with a life pension and a residence at Slough, in the neighborhood of Windsor Castle.

Multiple monikers

Soon, enough observations were made to calculate an orbit for Herschel's "comet." That's when an increasing number of astronomers began to doubt that what they were looking at was really a comet. For one thing, it seemed to be following a nearly circular orbit out beyond Saturn.

Eventually it was determined that Herschel's "comet" was in fact a new planet. For a while, it actually bore Herschel's name, though Herschel himself proposed the name Georgium Sidus — "The Star of George," after his generous benefactor. However, the custom for a mythological name ultimately prevailed and the new planet was finally christened Uranus.

Prior to its discovery, the outermost planet was considered to be Saturn, named for the ancient god of time and destiny. But Uranus was the grandfather of Jupiter and father of Saturn and considered the most ancient deity of all.

It probably was for all for the best. After all, if Herschel's request was granted, just think of how we might have listed the planets in order from the sun: Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn and ... George?

And then came Neptune by plotting the path of a planet, astronomers can draw up a table (called an "ephemeris") that can show them exactly where the planet will be at any given time. So, after the discovery of Uranus, they set about determining an ephemeris for it.

But this method didn't seem to work; sometimes Uranus turned up ahead of its predicted position; sometimes it lagged behind. It seemed to astronomers that some unknown body was somehow perturbing Uranus's orbit.

Adams was a student at Cambridge University, and he sent his results to Sir George Airy (1801-1892), the Astronomer Royal, with specific instructions on where to look for it. For some unknown reason Airy delayed a year before starting the search. In the meantime, Leverrier wrote to the Berlin Observatory requesting that they search in the place he directed. Johann Galle and Heinrich d'Arrest at Berlin did exactly as instructed and found the new planet in less than an hour.

The naming of this new eighth planet was more complicated than for Uranus. Initially, Janus and Oceanus were suggested. Leverrier wanted it to be named after him. But while the population of France seemed in favor of this, the other European countries resisted this moniker. Eventually, it was named for Neptune after the god of the sea.

Ice giant

Neptune is slightly smaller than Uranus, measuring 30,599 miles (49,244 km) in diameter. Like Uranus, Neptune is a frigid world, with temperatures at its cloud tops of -361 degrees F (-218 C). Because they are similar both in size and temperatures, Uranus and Neptune are referred to as "ice giants."

Because of its gaseous composition, its speed of rotation varies from 18 hours at the equator to just 12 hours at the poles. This differential rotation is the most pronounced of any other planet and results in exceedingly strong winds reaching speeds upward to 1,300 mph (2,200 kph). Most of the winds on Neptune move in a direction opposite to the planet's rotation.

Finding Neptune

This sky map shows where to find Neptune will be located around midnight on Sept. 13-14, as seen from New York City. Look for it in the constellation of Aquarius, to the right of the bright planet Mars. (Image credit: SkySafari app)

Unlike Uranus, Neptune is much too faint to be viewed with the unaided eye, lying at a mean distance from the sun of 2.8 billion miles (4.5 billion km); the most distant planet. It's about seven times dimmer than Uranus, but if you have access to a dark, clear sky and carefully examine the map above, you should have no trouble in finding it with a good pair of binoculars.

September is Neptune's month. It will be at opposition to the sun on Sept. 11, so it will be in the sky all night long, reaching its highest point in the southern sky at around 1 a.m. local time. Neptune can currently be found among the stars of Aquarius, the water bearer.

With a telescope, trying to resolve Neptune into a disk will be more difficult than it is with Uranus. You're going to need at least a 4-inch (10 cm) telescope with a magnification of no less than 200-power, just to turn Neptune into a tiny blue dot of light.

[flamingo-writes]

Don’t Tell Dimitri — Claude x Reader

Summary: It was after one of the monthly missions that Byleth had asked you to assist with the Golden Deer. Your lance skills were remarkable enough to have Claude manipulating Byleth into asking for your help. However, Claude’s reasons to do so were others rather than just your strength and skill.    

A/N: I went for F!Byleth instead of Gender Neutral Byleth, as I originally intended. I’ve been playing far too long with F!Byleth, I sometimes forgt M!Byleth is a thing too XD forgive me. Also, I’ve been loving the Golden Deer route, although I’ve got to admit, I miss my Blue Lions :c Anyways, I hope you enjoy this. 

Also! I headcannon Byleth to be a cheeky little shit. Everytime I have the opportunity to answer with any sarcastic/smartass answer, I go for that one. So, my perception of Byleth is heavily influenced by it. I apologize if you eadcanon Byleth to be more of a composed/serious character.  

Posted: 04.21.2020

Word Count: 1.7K

Warnings: curse words. 

How bad things would go if someone ever found out Claude's teeny tiny crush on Dimitri's younger sister? The princess of Faerghus. Being roughly a year younger than both Claude and Dimitri, skill wise, you weren't in any way behind them.

In fact, from a young age, you showed great skill with a lance, despite your lack of Crest. You waved your lance with such precision as if it were both a third arm and your dominant hand. With such grace and skill you waved any lance, making it hard to believe you lacked a Crest. 

That skill was what first caught Claude's attention. However, your laid back personality and sharp tongue amused him like very few things in life did. However, he could see through the cheerful mask you wore to cope with the horrible past you and Dimitri had been through. 

"Say, Teach" Claude said walking up to Byleth who was attentively watching you train with Felix. "Don't you think we'll need a little help for our mission at the end of the month?" 

"I can't believe you are admitting our lack of skill, Claude. It pains me, really" Byleth snapped sarcastically at once "I'm sorry I can't be the Professor you deserve" She continued, knowing it would either annoy Claude or amuse him. 

"Oi, no one said anything about you as a professor" Claude chuckled corresponding to Byleth's sarcasm "I was just merely stating a possibility…" 

"Why are you here, Claude? I know its not because you want to train. I rarely see you doing anything productive at all on a Sunday" The professor remarked as Claude laughed softly.

"Alright, you got me, I'll cut the bullshit" 

"Language, kid" Byleth chuckled rather amused by hearing kids use curse words. 

"Those two are very tough on the battlefield. That first mock battle we had, I swear to the goddess, for a second I thought we were done for when I fought against her…" Claude recalled as Byleth nodded, remembering how Claude barely could dodge your fierce moves.

"You're suggesting that I should ask for their help for our next mission, is that right?" 

"To be honest, Felix kinda scares me a bit" Claude admitted "He's so short fused, I'm afraid he ends up stabbing me instead if I do something to upset him. [Name] however...she's cool, funny, she laughs at my jokes. She's much more laid back than her brother. And at the same time, she's a killing machine with a lance" 

"Is it just me or do I smell your hormones all over me?" Byleth chuckled, looking at Claude, trying to see his reaction, however, the young man simply shrugged. “You could either genuinly care for this girl, or you just want to get on Dimitri’s nerve, which one is it? Or is it both?” Byleth teased. 

"Say what you want, Teach. Tease me to your heart's contempt. But rest assure, you'll remain my favorite lady in this monastery…" 

"Good, I was worried that you might replace me for her" Byleth replied sarcastically. 

"Me? Never! Who do you think I am?" Claude giggled mischievously.

"The Claudster" Byleth smiled back at her student before looking back at Felix swinging his sword swiftly as you effortlessly stopped each and every one of his attacks "Alright, I'll ask for her help after she's done training" 

♤ 

By the end of the month, on your way to the battlefield, Claude and you didn't stop giggling and whispering things to one another. The two of you looked like elementary kids plotting something. But that same behavior helped camouflage Claude's feelings for you, as people thought you two were just friends. Some believed you were close to you just to piss Dimitri off. Either way worked to mask the secret Claude so desperately wanted to hide.

The mission wasn't particularly hard. But maybe it was because you were there giving a helping hand. A very helpful one. However, things of course wouldn't be as good after the Golden Deer had won the war. 

While saving Claude's back while he was busy shooting an arrow, you'd twisted your ankle throwing your lance at a thief running towards Claude, ready to slash his back with a sword. 

Claude helped you walk, holding one of your arms around his shoulders and one of his arms around your waist.

"I definitely owe you big time" Claude said, grateful that you'd saved his life.

"Oh, normally I wouldn't ask you to return favours, but I will ask for this one back" you joked, laughing, trying to mask the unbearable pain on your ankle.

"You better don't tell Dimitri about this" Claude laughed, knowing your brother would be particularly amused with Claude getting his sister injured.

"I don't know, it'd be a good way to blackmail you" You joked.

Once back at the camp, Marianne took a look at your ankle. Working a little bit of magic, it soon stopped aching and it no longer was swollen. 

"I-I'm so sorry, [Name]. I can't completely cure you ankle. It'll no longer hurt, but you'll still need to rest" The shy girl mumbled too fast and too low, it was hard for you to properly listen to her. 

"It's cool. You already did a lot" You tried reassuring her "The pain was the worst part. Thank you Marianne" You smiled.

"Teach, what now?" Claude asked Byleth as she sat next to you, looking at your ankle "It's almost sunset. We won't be able to be back at the monastery before nightfall" 

"We leave tomorrow morning. It is dangerous to wander at night" Byleth answered standing up and walking to her tent. "Especially considering one of us isn't in the best condition to fight if we run into something"

♤

The moon was almost at its highest point in the night sky. The campsite, dark and silent, as only the echoes of Raphael's loud snoring. And Claude was unable to fall asleep. Not because of Raphael, it wasn't the first time they camped, the snoring had never been a problem. 

His mind was restless with the thought of you being asleep a couple of tents away from his. In an in impulsive thought he could not ignore, he left his tent and walked across the camp stealthily until he reached your tent.

"[Name]" He whispered. She's asleep, you jerk...He told himself after whispering your name a second time. "[Name]" 

The fabric shook gently as you popped your head out of the tent. 

"Why the hell are you still up?" You whispered a scream.

"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" The boy asked.

"Not at all" 

"What?" Claude raised an eyebrow as a smirk spread through his face "Why the hell are you still up?"

"Don't use my lines against me, smartass" You giggled "Wanna come in?" 

Claude tried not to answer right away and instead waited a couple of seconds as if he was considering it.

"Sure" he shrugged.

You sat on your sleeping bag as Claude kneeled inside your tent and sat next to you.

"So? What brings you here?" You said leaning back, resting your weight on one of your arms.

"Couldn't sleep. And I heard noises coming from your tent" he lied, since you hadn't been making any noise whatsoever, but didn't question his words. "Wanna hang out while either of us gets sleepy?" 

"Sounds good to me" You shrugged.

"Thank you for saving me today. Or...yesterday. whatever" He said frowning softly. "Thank you" 

"Don't thank me Claude. I was merely doing my part, thats it" you said as your fingers reached his earring. "I like it, it suits you" 

"Thank you, darling" he smirked leaning into your touch and shrugging softly "You're tickling me" 

"I didn't know you were ticklish" You giggled, smiling mischievously. 

"[Name], no!" Claude chuckled holding your wrist tightly as you tried to sneak it to his neck. "If we wake anyone up we'll be in trouble"

"Since when do you care about getting in trouble?" You snapped as Claude looked at you with a stare you knew it only meant trouble.

"True" He hissed as he moved closer to you.

"No" You said once you noticed his menacingly stare as his hands quickly found their way to your neck and sides "Stop! Claude!" you tried to keep your giggles under control as Claude was the one tickling you now. "We'll get in trouble" You whispered a scream.

"Sorry, don't care" He whispered back at you as his fingers kept roaming, tickling you, trapping you in a torturous laugh.

"Claude!" You cried.

"Alright, fine" He was giggling as he stopped "Whatever Her Highness commands" He chuckled as you caught your breath. 

"Claude?" You whispered, still panting softly. 

"Yes, [Name]?" With a pleased cheeky smirk, he looked at you, his gorgeous green eyes meeting yours.

His heart stopped for a second once he realized what kind of look you were giving him. Your eyes were beginning to look sleepy, and yet, they scanned his face slowly. He noticed the particular way your stare would stop on his eyes and his lips.

Taking the hint, he leaned closer, slowly, giving you time to decide what happened next. At first, you didn't move, and the tip.of your.noses brushed softly, as he kept looking at you. 

In a barely audible  voice, you whispered his voice before closing your eyes. Once Claude saw his cue, he leaned in, closing in the space between the both of you. His lips met yours. 

It started as a shy simple kiss that quickly heated up after you locked your lips with him. At first, the both of you awkwardly trying to adjust to each other's rhythm. But once you managed, the both of you lost yourselves in it. 

With your heart on your throat, you clung to Claude, wrapping your arms around his neck and gripping his hair. At the same time, Claude wrapped one of his arms around your back and squeezed you against his, while he rested his weight on his free hand. 

Finally, you broke the kiss, the both of you breathless, panting lowly. Claude bumped his forehead against yours as the both of you remained motionless. 

"Let's not tell Dimitri about this" You panted as Claude nodded. 

"Agreed" He whispered, looking into your eyes for a brief second before leaning closer to steal another kiss from you.

[ordinaryschmuck]

Top 20 BEST Animated Series of the 2010s-5th Place

Up until now, I’ve been pretty iffy on which show went where on this list. However, from here on out, there is no doubt in my mind the ranking is almost perfect (or, at least, to me it is). 

Just keep in mind, this next pick isn’t as cute and innocent as it might look.

#5-Camp Camp (2016-)

The Plot: Camp Campbell is a place where kids can go to do anything! Like space camp, theater camp, art camp, magic camp, and also other magic camp! It’s a dream come true...except for a little rapscallion named Max, who was forced to go there by his crappy parents. With the help of his two new friends, Neil and Nikki, the three of them will make it their life's mission to make life a living hell for their two camp counselors. Or, at least, it’s their life’s mission until the end of the summer.

This is the first and only web series on this list, and it is made by the (in)famous production company called Rooster Teeth. And trust me when I say that Camp Camp is the best show Rooster Teeth created ever since they started working on Red vs. Blue. And I can think of a couple reasons why.

Reason number one is the show’s comedy. Just like Rick and Morty, Camp Camp relies on being absurd and dark to get a laugh out of audiences. However, there is one thing Camp Camp has that gives it an advantage: The fact that it’s a show on the internet. There’s a lot of jokes that writers are not allowed to get away with on television. But on the internet, it’s all free game, baby! You want to make jokes about Hitler and the holocaust? Go ahead. You want a young cis boy to ask when he’s going to get his period? Go ahead. You want four kids to get scarred for life after catching old people having sex? Go right the f**k ahead. Because this is the internet. A place that is impossible to make kid-friendly, no matter how hard certain websites try! (And in case you’re wondering: Yes, all of those examples I just listed are actual jokes within the show. So have fun.)

With the benefit of having little to no filter, Camp Camp’s sense of humor allows it to go further with its jokes while having competent enough writers knowing the definition of “too far.” Because believe it or not, there is a limit that this show has with how far it’ll take its humor, and rarely does it feel like it crosses it (and it’s usually Kerry Shawcross’ episodes that crosses the line, oddly enough). Now, as I’ve established in my Rick and Morty review, not everyone is going to find these types of jokes funny. But for the most part, I personally think Camp Camp is hilarious. In fact, out of a fifty-nine episode line up, there is a total of ONE episode that I felt was low on the laughs. And like most good comedies, the best jokes come from who’s saying them and not what's being said. People need to remember that humor comes from the characters. Otherwise, when the gag goes to the wrong cast member, you’ll end up having people respond with, “but that’s not what this character would do or say.” In fact, the only time when a joke falls short in the show is when the wrong character says what is already a funny line that’s just misplaced.

And seeing as how we’re already talking about the cast, now might be a great time to mention that Camp Camp has the best group of characters Rooster Teeth made since the first thirteen seasons of Red vs. Blue. Like I said with Rick and Morty, I prefer to have a series with a moderately large cast of characters, as it offers writers enough room to work with so the series doesn’t become stale. And boy, does this show have a lot to work with. Everybody starts off with a personality that’s simple and serves the purpose of making a joke. But as the Camp Camp goes on, the more that these personalities grow and the audience gets to learn more about them. Even characters who seem like they’re only useful for the same comedic bit eventually become more complex as the series progresses. The best example is Dolph, who starts off as a source for Hitler jokes. But in the episode “The Candy Kingpin," we see that he’s also a little kid who’s just lonely and naive...while also still being the source of Hilter jokes. Now, at a glance, it might seem like there are too many characters, and it can certainly feel like it at times. Luckily the writers are smart enough to know which characters need more focus and which ones can be used for comedy. For instance, Space Kid doesn’t seem that complex in the slightest, but he’s a source for comedy, so he doesn’t need to be. Besides, the writers can develop any characters it wants whenever they want to. Because if Max and David are of any indication, this show has the best character development in any Rooster Teeth series.

I’m not kidding when I say that the relationship between Max and David is the best thing about the series. They start off with a simple dynamic: David is the happy go lucky optimist who gets in the way of Max’s pessimistic schemes. There’s nothing too noteworthy at first, and the majority of the episodes are just Max screwing over David and David keeping Max in check. However, the showrunners found a way to make their relationship more intriguing with each season. (Kinda spoilers ahead) Not only does Max learn that David understands how rough life can be, but, realizes why David has the determination to stay optimistic in the first place. And once David learns why Max is so jaded, he begins to work with Max through a new angle. In fact, the second they’re both on even ground, the two of them stop working against each other and learn how to work with each other (kinda spoilers over). Now don’t get me wrong. David still gets on Max’s nerves and vice versa, but there’s still a small amount of respect shared between the two. This is what I loved about their dynamic: Their development isn't blatant, but it still exists. In Red vs. Blue, it feels like Tucker’s development seems to take a step backward and forwards with every other season. And in RWBY, it feels like Yang is a different character after experiencing a traumatic event. This is understandable given what happened to her. But seeing how her having a sense of humor, which is everything likable about her personality, left after this one moment, it can be a bit disappointing (especially since Yang seemed like a person who hid her trauma through comedy). As for Max and David, everything that is likable about their personalities is still there, only now seen through a different light. This may not seem that impressive, but considering how Rooster Teeth has handled character development in the past, it’s pretty great.

Here’s another thing that may not seem as impressive as it really is: The show’s animation. I am amazed at how this series manages to have a television-quality of effort. Now, that may not sound like a compliment, but considering that this is a web series, it’s pretty darn impressive. Most online animated shows barely stick to a weekly schedule and the ones that do only manage to have episodes lasting for 3-5 minutes. So, seeing as how Camp Camp can have 12-24 minute long episodes once a week AND still managing to look good is a testament to how far internet animation has come. There’s also a surprisingly large amount of detail added into the show. I’m not talking about the characters themselves, as they have pretty simple designs. What I am talking about are the little things that the animators added in. If you pay attention to the props, backgrounds, and even things they wrote in, you’ll notice a whole lot of things that would have flown over your head otherwise, such as great jokes, continuity nods, and even sublime foreshadowing when it comes to season three.

So as you can tell, there’s a lot to like about this series. So you’re wondering why it’s only #5. Well, my reasons are more pitiful if I’m being honest. You see, Camp Camp is aimed at adults, but it doesn’t feel like that at times. Like I said with my Final Space review, most writers think that for a series to be considered for adults, you have to use sex, drugs, violence, and cursing. Now, in all fairness, those aren’t really meant for kids. And understandably so. However, if you take all of that stuff out, then what’s stopping this show from becoming kid-friendly? Not a whole lot, especially since there’s a handful of episodes that have plots I’ve seen in other kids' shows (“Jermey Fartz,” “Eggs Benefits,” and “Night of the Living Ill,” to name a few). Personally, I believe that for a show to be for adults, it requires two things. One is to have writing that may seem boring to kids but interesting for adults. It's also important to have stories/plots that kids are not ready to fully understand yet. If you fail to do both, then there’s nothing stopping a twelve-year-old from watching your show and enjoying it just the same. And I should know because I was twelve when I started watching Rooster Teeth’s content in the first place.

Also (and this next complaint is less pitiful and more problematic), it's not good with how whitewashed the voice cast is. I get it. A voice is a voice, and the color of the actor's skin shouldn't matter...except that it does. Because if you're going to go the route of having a diverse cast of characters, then you might as well go all the way by having their voice actors be people of color as well. And don't get me wrong, these actors do a perfect job for their respective roles, both for the dramatic and comedic moments. But, as this series started coming out in 2016, long before current events, it still bothered me that a character like Nerris--

--was voiced by a woman like Barbara Dunkleman:

Yeah...That’s a big yikes.

So while it may not exactly be the best example of an adult series and definitely needs some recasting, Camp Camp is still one of the best shows in the 2010s. It has impressive animation for an online series, has hilarious comedy, and even better characters to enjoy. And seeing as how this is only #5, that can only mean that the shows can only get better from here.

(Side note, is it bad that two seasons of this show made me connect to the characters much better than the first six seasons of RWBY? Because I certainly think so.)

[aw-eather]

Heather Watched the Extended Threads.

As if I haven’t already had a bad morning, lets emotionally torture ourselves shall we. Here is my running commentary:

Under a read more cause it was 8 pages of notes. 

That Previously On just shows that the main point of this episode is to get Sam and Jack together so if y’all don’t think they’re together after this, I have some news for you.

Gucci Douchebag making an appearance in the Previously On is not my idea of fun

JACOB I MISS YOU I AM ALREDY CRYING GOD HELP ME

Alright the episode has started with KERRY JOHNSON LOVE OF MY LIFE

Sam, you can’t be jealous, you’re literally MARRYING ANOTHER MAN.

Lol Jack you moron as if Daniel would walk through the door right now.

Sam is glaring at you funny just fyi.

But he’s right, Daniel is just waiting for y’all to be nice about him.

Oma I would like to order a plate of fucks to give about Daniel’s story at this point

Teal’c of the Tau’ri is a cute title I love that man

Aww I feel so proud of Teal’c.

FUCK OFF PETE

JAAACOOOB

Pete is so cringy

Jacob let Jack call him Dad once.. Pete has to wait until after marriage.

This is awkward as fuck

Pete you are so insensitive,

Jacob hates him. Same honestly.

You can tell he hates him tho, he’s not hiding it. My partners mum did a better job and she’s homophobic.

Sam is SO NOT in love with this guy

Oma being cryptic, checks out

Anubis makes me wanna punch someone.

This episode is really just tying up loose threads (probably hence the title) but its nice to know Pete is considered a loose thread 😊

Teal’c having to decide between the Jaffa and the Tau’ri is sad

Agh the newspaper and Daniel finding out about plans is an aggravating storyline

“I’m gonna marry him” reads the same as “Dad, I am happy”. Honey who are you trying to convince??? We don’t believe you.

“I know how happy he makes you” *Cut to Sam who looks nonchalant* *cut to Jacob who knows exactly what he’s doing and what he’s doing is attempting to stop her marrying Gucci Doucebag*

Selmak isn’t alive to make that call Jacob stop lying

I’M GONNA CRY AGAIN

She is really thinking about this. Like she looks like she’s second guessing herself constantly.

KERRY

JACK

KERRY AND JACK

JACK AND KERRY

WAKING UP TOGETHER

OH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

I love how soft and tender he is with her, I imagine he’d be the same with Sam.

I love how he cuddles her and kisses her and plays with her hair and that hand on her face I--- *insert heart eyes*

I just really love them so much I wish we got more of soft, boyfriend Jack

Trouble in Jaffa land lol

I think he did really like her though.

Anyway back to Half Ascended!Daniel

Oma ya shouldn’t have helped the first two times, that’s the fucking problem babe

I literally do not give a shit about Daniel, I’m sorry. I really try but I can’t

OH NO THE PHONE CALL SCENE

She is SO sick of Gucci Douchebag

I can’t believe he called her at WORK over FLOWERS

AND SAYING ITS URGENT FUCK SAKE

I love Peter in the back

Jack watching her

Jacob is playing matchmaker so hard I fucking love him

Sam’s face tho is sooooo funny LIKE DAD SHUT UP WE DON’T MENTION THIS IN FRONT OF MY CO

Oh the little sigh he does before telling her to go pick flowers I can’t handle that man, he’s so heartbroken its like a lost puppy

Jack smiles but his eyes say oh yeah, I lost her and she’s happy with someone else now. PLOT TWIST: she’s miserable

Sam looks hurt because she still loves Jack

FUCK ME IT HURTS THEY DESERVED MORE

Jacob don’t play dumb babe, we know what you’re trying to do

Oh she MAD MAD at Dad

Why is it ok to break some rules and not others, you ask? Because y’all are white and can get away with it?

Oma just stop helping people. You don’t need to help them, just stop. I don’t want to be an ascended being y’all suck

Chocolate or vanilla like go HOME WE DON’T WANT YOU HERE

Sam shaking her head no about getting blown up by aliens is so cute I love her so much

This feels like friends talking

Or like these two people I know who claim they’re in love but its always soooo awkward around them.

Generally speaking that’s my type like you haven’t had two alien boyfriends in the last 8 years babe

“I have a surprise for you” YOU BOUGHT A FUCKING HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING HER YOU CRETIN

THAT’S NOT A SURPRISE THAT’S CONTROLLING AND WEIRD

I hate that she looks happy. Don’t get me wrong I want her happy, I really do. And as much as I’m sure she loved Pete, she wasn’t in love with him. But I suppose she was happy for the first time with some one she could have… feelings are complicated, best not to have them honestly.

Jack has really long eyelashes. Just an observation.

That’s a lotta sugar, Danny boy. And Its not gonna make you any sweeter, I promise.

I love that he took the cup with him like he’s gonna drink it with THAT much sugar in it

Exposition, exposition, exposition.

Go away Anubis ya pain In the arse.

Oh the HOUSE

Have I said how much I hate that outfit cause I hate that outfit

It is a beautiful house to be fair but like…

Look at the PANIC in her eyes

I already have a problem with how they got engaged and the fact they stayed together after he STALKED HER.

Pete’s ability to control a situation and guilt trip her (literally he ran away and had her investigated by the FBI when she wouldn’t tell him about her work) reminds me of my ex. Which is probably why I hate him so damn much.

THE DECK SCENE

HER LOOKING AT HIS HOUSE

THE MUSIC

HE LOOKS GOOD IN DARK BLUE

I’M SORRY ITS ALL IN CAPS I’M TYPING AND WATCHING AND I’M SCREMING ON THE INSIDE DEAL WITH IT FAM I’M SORRY

THAT SMALL GRIN ON HIS FACE WHEN SHE SAYS SHE’S BEEN WORKING UP THE NERVE TO COME AND TALK TO HIM

TRUTH IS I’VE BEENTRYING TO WORK UP THE EVER FOR A LOT LONGER THAN THAT STOOP

ITS NOT GREAT JACK

YEAH BUT JACK HAS AN EVEN NCER HOSUE

SECOND THUGHTS

YES YOU ARE. GIANT MISTAKE INFACT

SHE’S REHEREDSE THIS SO MANY TIMES

KERRY FUCK OFFF NOW IS NOT THE TIME SWEETIE

THE BEER LOL

UES IT IS AWKKWARD

JACKS FACE OUCH

KERRY IS SO SWEET ASKING HER TO STAY FOR LUNCH

NO NOT DAD FUCK

Kerry caught him looking a little too long tbh

I’m not editing typos out of that btw it shows my rage

DAAAAAAD

JACOB YOU SWEET MAN

Oh sam honey I’m so sorry

I’m gonna cry again

FUCK OFF DANIEL JFC I literally do not give a shit

I only found out about Carmen’s death a couple months ago so I’m not gonna handle this well fam

Oh no

I’m typing and not looking again

Because Jacob is gonna tell her to go after Jack

I can’t breath

Six years ago

I’m not letting that go

It’s a continuity fuck up

Not that important but drives me nuts

No you’re not

He’s talking about jack

Come on sam he’s not dum

Everything you want is a house, a marriage and JACK

KERRY

LOVE OF MY LIFE

BREAKING UP WITH JACK FOR THE GREATER GOOD

I really like YOU Kerry

He’s so sad

He really liked Kerry

Retire please sir

Bye Kerry, I miss you already <3

If he told Sam he loved her right now she’d drop everything for him

He’s contemplating it

He’s confused but he’s thinking abut it because she’s stressed right now and ENGAGED but damn Kerry makes good points

More explanation and blah blah

Like if this was the main point of the story, there would be more talk of it outside of Daniel and we wouldn’t have just had 20 straight minutes if Sam and Jack pining over each other

Sorry can we talk about how PETE put a down payment on a house with OUT talking to her?? What if she didn’t like the neighbourhood?

Sorry I’m still mad about that

To be fair that green does look good on Daniel

Oma looks so proud

THEN STOP -B R E A K I N G- IT YOU GOOSE

Fuck sake woman

I’m so emotionally traumatised by this episode that I can’t remember half of what is added and half of whats in the 40 minute cut because I am repressing it lol. Obviously the scene with Kerry and the ones with Pete

NO JACOB

AND JACK BEING THERE FOR SAM

AND THEY MIGHT AS WELL HAVE SAID I LOVE YOU ALL OVER AGAIN

SORRY I NEED A TEN MINUTE BREAK TO CRY

OK I’m back

Sam looking at her like he wants to tell her he loves her breaks my tiny stone cold heart even more

He didn’t actually NEED to put his arm around her but they both actually really did need it

The way she rubs her thumb on his hand and leans into him I fucking can’t

AND MORE DANEIL FFS

Sorry I just feel like this was supposed to be the A plot, Dakara was the B plot and Sam/Jack was the C plot but it ended up Sam/Jack = A, Daniel and Anubis = B, Dakara = C

Took ya long enough to catch on, Danny boy

Good BYE PETE

You didn’t know shit from the beginning go home

That’s the same shade of blue Jack had on before… interesting

I mean it does have something to do with her father…

She will, babe, don’t stress

To be fair, to give him some credit, he took it like a champ

But also don’t be a creep ya know

Why does Sam’s jacket look awkward

She just looks awkward this entire sequence

INCOMING WORMHOLE

What, pray tell, is the point of the self destruct if it doesn’t blow up the gate? Isn’t that part of the point?

Daniel ya tit, that’s not gonna work

Fuck YEAH OMA

BEAT HIS FUCKING ASS

Now Daniel can come back to earth and be with Vala thanks

Literally the only time I like him is with Vala and then its with a push

This seems a little too convenient tbh

I know it was OMA but this episode just feels…. Disjointed

Ah but will you destroy it? Probably not knowing the Jaffa

I wonder if Sam and Jack have spoken by now. Clearly not the same day because different clothes.

I’d say two days since Dad?

Ack Naked!Daniel

Jack is so AWKWARD I LOVE HIM

SAM CAN’T LOOK AT HIM

BRA’TAC IS ENCOURAGING THIS BULL SHIT

F I S H I N G

I can believe it, Sam.

She’s leaning towards him

Aw that giggle

That look she gives him

They’re so happy

This was the perfect ending

It should have finished there

How much time passed between then and s9 I wonder

At least a month right because Sam had been away a month?

Well that was good.

Hurt my heart but it was good

Final notes:

Jacob and Janet deserved better

I want more Kerry

They should have stopped at s9

Sam and Jack are together now, TRY and convince me otherwise

I’m thinking of smutty fic ideas for the cabin please stop me

Thanks for coming along on that emotional roller coaster ride. Ended up being 9 pages of dot points so I’m sorry! But I feel like I’ve said my bit.

Oh one last thing

Fuck Pete 😊

[eri-blogs-life]

Tales of Vesperia is a game about how bitcoin is bad

Okay, not really. But kind of. Hear me out

Now, this write-up is gonna be full of spoilers, I just love the Tales of series and always feel a lot when I finish playing one, so I wanna get my thoughts down on “paper”. If you wanna know my overall thoughts on the game in a spoiler-free way, here they are: It’s really good and I liked it a lot

So, the Tales of series has always held a special place in my heart. I played Tales of Symphonia when I was in middle school and high school, and I played Tales of Symphonia a LOT during that time. Eventually I found Tales of the Abyss on the 3ds, and I also played Zestiria on PC. When I heard Tales of Vesperia was getting an enhanced port to the switch, I was so excited!! When it came out, I picked it up right away and played it... But after about the first major story arc, I set it aside to play something else and didn’t return to it for awhile. But, finally, a couple weeks ago I got back into a kick of playing big RPGs again, and Tales of Vesperia was a perfect candidate! So I marathoned it over the last like 2 weeks.

Story: Story is usually the core of a Tales of game. They’re big, they’re grand, and they usually have some kind of stance to take on an issue with society as a whole. Plus they’re called Tales. That’s literally just story.

Tales of Vesperia’s story was good. But, at least to me, it fell a little flat later on. Act 1 felt really strong as a standalone piece, but then it felt like the game’s theming started falling apart a little as it progressed, switching from an individual story about our protagonists to a grander story about the world. I don’t think the latter parts were bad, necessarily, but from Act 1 I felt the game was going to have a much more personal story when it ended up becoming a much more worldly story.

The game doesn’t break itself into “Acts”, this is just a way I’ve been thinking of the game myself. That breaks down into this sort of story summary:

Act 1, Introduction: Yuri leaves his home because their aque blastia got stolen and they need to get it back. Along the way, he has to make the decision that in order to deal with those who the law cannot touch, he has to become a vigilante, killing corupt politicians and other figures himself rather than letting the law attempt (and usually fail) to reach them. Act 1 ends with Yuri accepting that he can’t necessarily do all the vigilante work on his own and he joins up with Karol and Judith to form the guild Brave Vesperia.

Act 2, The Buildup: With Princess Estellise as their first client, Brave Vesperia is dragged all over the world on a quest to learn more about Estelle’s family history. Eventually, we learn that the ancient people awoke a dangerous monster called the Adephagos, and it has the potential to be reawoken if the world continues to use blastia (a technology in the Vesperia setting). As Act 2 wraps up, Commandant Alexei and his swarms of unquestioning soldiers activate an ancient weapon so Alexei can rule the world. But oops! It’s not a weapon, it was a barrier meant to keep the Adephagos out of the world. Alexei is killed.

Act 3, The FInale: With the Adephagos threatening the world, Brave Vesperia has to find some way for the people of the world to get by without access to blastia, as even if the Adephagos is killed, continued use of blastia will cause the world’s aer to go out of control and create a new Adephagos. The party finds a solution in the ability to turn ancient creatures known as Entelexaia into Spirits, elemental creatures that have the ability to manipulate and preserve the world’s aer, keeping it from going out of control. Meanwhile, a figure called Duke has determined that the best solution is actual to kill all humanity, because they will always find a way to pollute the world’s aer or in some way ruin the natural world. In the end, the party defeats Duke, and Duke decides to actually help the party stop the Adephagos in the end, allowing for humanity to live on and find new ways of surviving without the blastia technology they have relied on for so long.

So... I felt like the game really neatly fit into this three act structure, but each Act feels like its own distinct story, with different themes throughout, rather than a single unified story. Act 1 focused on trying to answer the question of “How do you deal with people who the law can’t touch?”. Act 2 focused on the question of Is it okay to blindly follow a charismatic imperialist leader? And Act 3 focused a lot on the question of How do we deal with our own technology causing problems with the natural world? So, it felt disconnected to me

The game’s “Characteristic Genre Name” is “Enforcing One’s ‘Justice’ RPG”. So presumably the game’s story should have a theme of enforcing one’s justice. And Act 1 focuses heavily on that with our main protagonist Yuri. I think an argument could be made that Act 3 focuses on that with the duel between Brave Vesperia and Duke showing the two sides trying to fight for their own “justice” in their view of how the world should be. Act 2 then feels a little disconnected, but I think an argument could be made that a lot of its focus is on Estelle learning to make decisions for herself rather than just be pulled along with whatever it is that other people put in her way, so she is learning to enforce her ‘justice’.

So, back to my catcher line at the top, no, Tales of Vesperia is not directly about bitcoin being bad. But it has a heavy focus in the latter parts about technology causing problems with the environment, in much the same way that our own technologies like bitcoin mining create pollution that causes our own air to be polluted. The Adephagos, being a creature that breaks through a barrier in the atmosphere when Terca Lumeiris’s aer is polluted, feels like a pretty dang good metaphor for global warming becoming a problem once our ozone barrier layer depleted as air pollution has increased on Earth. 

Characters: Tales games may be big on their stories, but the thing that really sells how good Tales of games are... it’s the characters. Tales games have really strong casts, and do a lot of optional characterization for the characters in ways that you really don’t see in any other JRPGs. Tales games give you the ability to watch Skits, which are just little dialogues the characters do, sometimes about some kind of story beat that just happened, but a lot of the time the Skits just focus on the characters interacting in some mundane way, and it really helps give you a stronger sense of who these characters are. And honestly, when it comes to a lot of Tales casts, there’s usually someone I feel pretty meh about. While I liked her story, Presea in Symphonia wasn’t very interested as a character to me, for example. But the main Vesperia cast is really strong and I really liked them all. So I just wanna talk briefly about each of them:

Yuri. The main character, the POV character for most of the game. Yuri starts out searching for a blastia and trying to bring a thief to justice, then becomes a vigilante killing corrupt politicians, then eventually becomes the leader of a guild whose stated goal is to enact justice and help people. Yuri was a really fun character to explore, even if I felt like a lot of his character development didn’t feel very strong after Act 1. 

Repede. The second character we’re introduced to, Repede is Yuri’s friend who also happens to be a dog. Or at least look like a dog. Repede doesn’t have much of a story going on, but god damn is he a dog. And has an alternate costume in the definitive edition that’s a 「J O J O   R E F E R E N C E」

Estelle. Princess Estellise is the driving point of a lot of the plot. She’s part of an ancient race of people who have magical powers without the need of blastia. But her people were mostly wiped out stopping the Adephagos a long time ago. She starts out as just this quiet little princess who’s trying to warn Flynn that people are hunting after him, but she really starts to grow to be her own person by the end.

Flynn. He is a knight, and struggles a lot with how to deal with those the law can’t touch, much like Yuri. Flynn and Yuri are very much foils of each other throughout the story. They’re old friends, and both tried to join the knights in order to change a corrupt system from within. But Yuri left the knights when they weren’t producing any results, becoming his vigilante self we know and love. But Flynn stayed in the knights, and between both of their opposite approaches to the world, they’re able to eventually change the world

Karol. The leader of Brave Vesperia, Karol is just a child. He starts out trying so, so hard to do cool things so he can impress people, but by the end he learns to work together with others to help people. And hey, that’s the coolest thing you can do.

Rita. A genius blastia researcher, Rita is integral to the plot, especially later on as it focuses more on the dangers of blastia. Rita has to come to terms with how the thing she loves above all else, blastia, might actually be hurting the world and shouldn’t be used.

Raven. Raven’s a neat character. He’s the classic Tales trope of the character who betrays you halfway through. In Act 2, it’s revealed that Raven is also the knight Schwann, and he’s been working both with your party, but also as a member of Alexei’s army. He has to deal with how he is just a pawn of Alexei, blindly following a characteristic imperial leader, and eventually he throws away his old identity as Schwann and becomes just Raven, a member of Brave Vesperia’s crew.

Judith. I love Judith. She’s all about destroying blastia. She knows they’re a problem, but doesn’t know why until joining up with Brave Vesperia and adventuring together for awhile. Like Rita, she’s gotta deal with a lack of purpose later on in the game, as once blastia are no longer used, her life goal of destroying blastia becomes pointless. She’s a really fun character, but I don’t know that I have the words to describe in what way.

Patty. She’s an interesting case. She’s the new character added in later updates to Vesperia, and wasn’t there in the original game. She starts out as an amnesiac who believes herself to be the granddaughter of the legendary pirate and outlaw, Aifread. But eventually it’s revealed that she is Aifread. And that brings up a lot of questions about why is she so young if she was a legendary and feared pirate captain? The optional late-game dungeon provides one explanation for this, in her having taking a sort of drug that allows one to extend their life, and the effects on humanity may be more drastic than just extending life. Patty’s a weird character. But, overall I’d say that I think they did a great job of incorporating her story into the overall Vesperia story, I think. Though oftentimes she feels very gimmicky and one-note, being all about pirate-y things and the sea. 

Gameplay: So how’s the game stack up, mechanically, to other games? Well, it’s got that great Tales style gameplay, a mix of RPG mechanics and a sort of 2.5-D fighter in its combat. And it’s noticable, being an evolution of the mechanics I loved in Symphonia that were expanded on in Abyss. Vesperia really feels good to play. 

One of my favorite things in the Tales series is how there’s usually this big cast of characters and you can have any of them be your player-controlled character. There’s usually like, your default character, Yuri in this case, that the game normally gives you control of. And Yuri was very fun to play as! But I also enjoyed trying out everyone else, and I put together a team that had me playing as Judith which was my treasure-hunting/gald-grinding team. I really liked Judith’s acrobatic high-flying combat style.

My Final Thoughts: Tales of Vesperia is really good. I think I’d rank it as my third-favorite Tales game that I’ve played so far, out of 5. So in terms of the Tales series, it’s middle of the road from my experiences so far I guess? But the Tales series is consistently above-average in my experience, so... Tldr it was a really fun experience and I’m glad I put the time into playing it.

[theartofbeinganeldar]

The Art of Being an Eldar: Legolas x Reader Prologue

Summary: You're a fantasy-loving, LARPing human from this world, who's the black sheep of society because of your obsession for the unreal and alienation of what's real. When you're in the middle of a LARP battle with some pretty phony boars, you fall out of a tree and bust your head. You wake up, alone, and are suddenly attacked by some very pissed-off, very real wargs. Without any idea of how you got there, you got dropped into Middle-Earth, with only bits and pieces of memories of Tolkien's masterpiece, though your recollection of everything else is perfectly clear. And of all places in Middle-Earth, you got dropped into Mirkwood, with some suspicious, potentially hostile, Woodland Elves...

Chapter No.: Prologue

Key: [Y/N]=Your Name [F/N]= Friend's Name [B/N]= Bro's Name [S/N]= Sis's Name [M/N]= Mom's Name [e/c]= eye color [h/c]= hair color [s/c]= skin color

Notes: So, this is my first fanfiction on tumblr, and I'd thought I'd try it since I have very little time for DeviantArt's chaos. It's much different from my Legolas x Reader on there. I added a small loving family to make the emotions relatable-- even if you don't have siblings, or have more than what I added, it's just fanfiction! Also, I tried to make my pronouns for said reader gender-nuetral so that everybody can enjoy it! The reason your character is so wild is for the sake of not fitting in to this world, yet you're used to it, so that later points in the plot can become more... Well, you'll see. And yes, I made Elves pansexual because I don't think they'd care much about gender or age at that point. LARPing plays a big role in the prologue, because your character is really into it for personal reasons. If this isn't your cup of tea, don't drink it. I hope you like it! Feedback, likes, and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

Warnings: Fluff, angst, graphic depictions of gore and violence (Cuz of orc battles y'know?), more angst, slow burn, some light depression in the first few chapters, some amnesia about Middle-Earth because the Valar say you're not supposed to have foresight, hard-core language, feels, lots and lots of feels, mentions of NSFW content, maybe some eventual NSFW content, LGTBQ+ characters, Thranduil being a jackass at first because he's fabulous, Legolas being a hot edgy prince that nobody can handle, Kili being an innocent bean, Hobbits being smol innocent beans, except for Bilbo 'cause he's been through some tough shit, Bard being dad of the year, Thorin being one dumbass boi, awesome dragons, awesome Nazgul, awesome scenery, awesome stuff in general, Elrond isn't listened to by anybody, confused Aragorn is confused,  Denethor's a bitch as always, brace yourself for creepy as fuck Cream of Wormtongue Grima Wormtongue, Boromir lives, Gandalf. (yes these are all legit warnings don't judge me.)

Pairings/Ships: Legolas x Reader, Legolas x you, Aragorn x Arwen, Faramir x Eowyn, Thranduil x Elvenqueen, Galadriel x Celery Celeborn, Boromir x OC, Thorin x OC, Fili x OC, etc. general LoTR standard shippings plus some of my own cuz I can't stand my boys being lonely

Word Count: I try to keep my chapters short, under 2000 words.

Rating: Teen (14+) for now

You'd never been considered normal by anyone. You enjoyed LARP instead of reality. Your "job" was just staying at home and captioning videos all day every day you weren't LARPing instead of interacting with society at a normal job. Your home? A tiny studio apartment that only cost $450 a month without bills, and you did without cell phone, car, and electric for the sake of being your weird self. You hadn't been to college yet, despite the fact that everyone told you to go once your gap year was over, and it almost was. What would you even study? Acting was all that got you close to who you were, so, ok, guess that's fine, but nobody else thought of that as a career. Maybe you could write fiction-- you were good at that much.

You weren't always like this. There was a time when you were just a normal kid, living a normal life. But somewhere around ten, you started to change, and by sixteen you'd become who you were today. If the Old You could see the New You, you weren't sure if they'd think you were weird too, or if they'd stare up at you in awe.

Hopefully it was the latter, which made you feel good.

I mean, come on, were you born in the wrong timeframe or what?! That's what you thought, anyway. There's no way that this world was for you. The fact that nearly all people were heartless jackasses that enjoyed destroying the planet, the fact that everybody had to be the same or were considered freaks, prejudice and injustice were key factors of life and the rich got handed everything on a silver platter while the poor had to scavenge... Just, everything of this reality made you hate it. If only you'd been born five hundred years earlier, or, y'know, in Game of Thrones or Lord of the Rings...

You'd really liked to have been born in Middle-Earth. You had so many books about it, you knew practically everything there was to know, even the confusing shit about Faramir being in the Fall of Gondolin. You'd practically memorized Elvish, and dwarvish, and you knew the whole six movies by heart, every line. And of course, like most Lord of the Rings fans, you had a massive crush on a certain Elvish princeling who was too pretty for his own good. In fact, Legolas was who inspired you to learn archery; maybe one day you'd be as good as he was.

Despite your wishes, you were stuck in reality, however much you hated it

. Even amongst your LARP groups, you were considered outlandish.

Everybody else had normal lives outside of their games, whereas you pretended this was your life. You didn't have any job aside from the small caption jobs you did when you weren't LARPing, no social life, nothing. The only people you had was your mother, brother, sister, and your only friend, [F/N]. They accepted you and your strange fantasies, even if they thought you'd one day regret acting in a way when you could've been beginning a normal life and being productive.

So excuse you if you decided to invite them to a LARP event and let them borrow some of your costumes. It wasn't the end of the world. But your LARP group apparently didn't get that memo.

"You invited your mom?!" A royal asshole sneered, yet you took satisfaction in the fact that his knight costume looked like it was made of cardboard painted silver, whereas your sci-fi Elf getup was actual leather and cloth. His name was Jacob Brent; you'd never really liked him. He'd always had it out for you because your costumes were so much more fabulous than his. Plus you may or may not have actually known swordplay and archery and dagger throwing and martial arts... Kinda. You were still in the process of learning kickboxing.

You cocked a sky blue-- yes, sky blue-- eyebrow to your equally bright blue hairline, spiked up in a short faux hawk. This was your first sci-fi Elf, and you'd wanted to go all out. A cocky grin split its way across your face. "Yeah, so? It doesn't effect you on any level, Tin Can."

He sniggered with his cronies. "I can't believe you don't have anyone else to come with you." He mimicked rubbing his eyes like he was four. "'Oh Mommy, I need somebody to come with me!'" His whole group burst into laughter.

You surprised them by joining in, actually appluading. "Oh, wow! Wonderful, just wonderful! Hey, should I tell Mindy that I seen you feeling up Roxie behind your fort last week?" He paled, and almost everybody in his group of crappy cosplay got 'o' faces. You put your hands on your hips. "Guess what, asshole, just 'cause I'm close with my family and you're not with yours doesn't make it a crime to hang out with them. It's my life, my decision, and I enjoy spending time with them." You hefted up a disappointingly fake spear, turning to walk away. "Oh, and by the way, your paint's chippin' off."

Reason for Hating Reality Number 6, 965: Immaturity levels are almost incomprehensibly high.

Your mom glared daggers at Jacob's Immaturity Harem. She'd always been a tough gal, always sticking up for you when you got bullied when you were younger, but now that you were an adult, she had to let you kick ass yourself; you were pretty good at it. "I don't like him." She stated casually, and you chuckled.

"'Course you don't. He looks like a cheesy robot costume you'd get from Wal-Mart with a too-big crotch protector that's not impressing anyone but himself, and he has the face of a roasting pig. Too tanned, too grubby, and always with something in his mouth."

She smiled slightly. "Has he always been giving you trouble?"

You swung your gear pack off of your shoulder, letting it yank itself down to earth. "Since the day he tried kissing my ass 'cause he didn't know me." [F/N] must've overheard that last sentence, because he burst into laughter when he approached with your brother, [B/N], and your sister, [S/N]. "You talking about Jacob?"

"Sure as hell."

You'd first met [F/N] a year ago, when you'd joined extra-curricular activites for your last year of high school. He thought your personality was incredibly brave, especially in this modern world, but even still... He was just a friend, not a best friend. You'd never had that luxury outside of your tiny family. You just didn't trust him after the life you'd had.

Unfortunately, it seems they didn't like the getups. "Do I have to wear this?" [B/N] asked dramatically, slumping over. He didn't look right in the pauldrons and leather breastplate.

"It's too heavy!" [S/N] complained.

You sighed theatrically. "My piteous children, deal with thy armor, for it must be worn despite thou complaints."

[B/N] pressed his palms together and bowed down. "Screweth thou, false companion."

You mimicked his bow. "Off to hell with thee."

"Hey! You guys! It's starting!" [F/N] cried, and ran off, his pack of weapons and magic bags trembling dangerously on his back. The rest of you followed more slowly, as you explained to your family how exactly LARPing worked. Battles weren't actually bloody, magic was just colored powder, you get points for a hit, and so on and so forth. [B/N] and [S/N] got it immediately, but your poor mom, who hadn't even ever played Skyrim, had no idea how the point system and leveling up worked. You had to explain it six times over before you'd reached the massive gathering of LARPing cosplayers. [F/N] returned to you as you reached it, carrying a map. "We were in Larsgyushter Prairie last, right?"

"Duh," You shrugged, at the same time [S/N] asked with a grimace, "Luckyestire Prairie?"

[F/N] inclined his head. "Well, I made some arrangements because your family joined us. We made for Glewnburg, where we picked up their characters, and then headed into the Elder Woods."

You took the map. "Sounds fair enough."

[S/N] frowned. "What exactly were you guys doing last time?"

[F/N] blushed; he must've liked her, which made you feel proud and like pummeling him all at once. "A quest to defeat a horde of wildebors in order to get a good amount of gold."

"How much?"

"Four hundred."

Your mom seemed confused. "Is that a lot?"

"For the land of Sisgremor," You retorted, "Not much. But it's enough for us. We hunt for food, and sleep in the woods. It's summertime, so we don't have much need for shelter unless it storms, and we know where to find caves. The coin is for some new bits of armor, and some weapon upgrades and a couple of magic books for [F/N]."

"Oh," Your mom said, and you took the lead, getting into your Elven character with a huge grin on your face.

"Come, my children! We must meet the bors by midday!" You ran off, but you didn't miss the looks over half of the LARP community gave you.

~le time skip~

The one thing you didn't like about LARPing was the enemies. They weren't believable and were crappily dressed, at least in your community. They were crappy actors and their dying acts were unrealistic. Unless they were orcs that had good makeup skills and good cosplay, they weren't worth fighting, but you had an imagination to kick them up a notch.

As always, the wildebors were just some guys in black outfits decorated with needles, and wearing pig masks with an underbite bearing tusks. Your imagination knocked them to eight-feet long beasts with bloodstained tusks, wild red eyes, and porcupine-like needles that shot out of their near-impenetrable hides if provoked.

You'd only fought these beasts once. They had three separate healthbars, each a different strength: eight hundred, four hundred, and one hundred. Your spear-- the only weapon you could afford after your bow snapped (Poor prop craftsmanship.), had a damage rate of ten health per hit, thirty if you could make a three-combo move (The highest combo move allowed.).  [F/N]'s magic bombs, bolts of energy, and other magic stuff only varied from ten to fifty health damage per hit, except for his Fyrering, which was a once-a-day power that was ninety health damage, plus a three minute window of burning which took ten damage every thirty seconds.

The boars were also viscious; one hit from them took around fifty health, and at level nine, you and [F/N]'s health bars were only at two hundred and fifty, plus your armor rating of fifty and his of twenty. Your family, however, were only at level one, with a one hundred strength health bar each and armor ratings varying between ten and fifteen.

In short: that meant a hell of a lot of hits, very little openings, and there were always numbers to consider. There were six of them, and five of you. If you had your bow, this would be easy. You'd climb a tree, avoid their needles, and fire your twenty-five damage arrows relentlessly (With the thirty plus bonus from your actual bow.) while [F/N] pelted them with magic. You could take down two, maybe three that way before retreating, waiting for your strength to regenerate and your undamaged arrows to "respawn" before coming back for more battling (The arrows don't actually exist, for safety reasons. You had to wait for ten minutes before an approximated number of arrows, determined previously by the quest-giver, "reappeared" in your "inventory.").

But you had to think of a new plan. A brand new plan. You had three level one novices, two level nine intermediates, and six angry-as-hell wildebors that were level twenty. This was an impossible quest. You should never have accepted it knowing your family was coming.

You were hiding behind a huge oak, and glanced around it; for a split moment, you saw the crappy actors, but your mind quickly fixed that. Above and to your immediate right, [F/N] hid behind a mound of boulders up on a hill, and you'd positioned your family similarly. You just couldn't see them. [F/N]'s hand waving caught your attention. Frantically, he pointed above you. You whipped your head up, but saw nothing out of the ordinary. You gave him a look like WTF dude, and he rolled his eyes. He picked up a rock as an example and pointed back up into the branches, but still, you didn't see anything. He gestured again, almost forcefully, and this time, you seen it: brightnuts, a specialized kind of walnut bred specifically to explode into a bright white light on impact, with dangerous shrapnel and poisonous fumes that had one hundred and fifty health damage.

Of course, in reality, they were just blue and white beanbags hanging in nets rigged all over the branches, but you pretended they weren't.

But still, perfect.

You'd start calling out orders as soon as you started throwing them. [F/N] knew how to improvise to a plan already, but your family didn't. You propped your spear up on the tree, and started climbing, wincing when the bark scraped your palms; you were wearing what'd used to be white bridal gloves, but you'd tinkered with them to match your costume, sewing sky blue patterns into the gloves.

You personally didn't make a sound, but a couple of leaf-covered branches fell; luckily, wildebors were mostly deaf and blind, so you should make it to the top of the tree without any consequences.

You flashed [F/N] a triumphant smile when you reached the topmost branches, snatching a bag of brightnuts and holding them high above your head. He shot you a double thumbs-up, then made a wheel-like gesture to get you to move on. You stuck your tongue out at him, then readjusted yourself on the branch to get a good aim.

A few seconds of struggling against the knot, and you'd gotten the net open. With barely a minute of hesitation, you drew your arm back, and fired. Your aim was almost perfect. You hit one of the wildebors in the side, and you seen the actor as he started the most over-acted reaction you'd seen yet: a violent jump, then what sounded like a deranged "Guuuugh!" You rolled your eyes. So dramatic.

Either way, [F/N] whooped behind you. "Hit! A hit!"

Before you could give any orders whatsoever, [B/N] charged down the hill with his realistic-looking wooden battleaxe bellowing a war cry. You slumped over. "Aw, shit."

In the blink of an eye, [B/N] was officially dead but still pummeling the poor actors, your mom didn't know what to do, [F/N] didn't realize what was happening from behind his rock, and [S/N] was dodging air like a boss. You waited on the branch until the coach of the actors stood, took off his mask, and blew his whistle.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! You with the axe! You died already! Come on everybody, regroup, come on..." Your mom and [S/N] were laughing it off with a couple of the actors, but [B/N] was having a heated argument with the rest of them, and they were starting to shove each other around; he'd always been a sore loser. The coach separated them, and [F/N] called to you from below. "Guess we failed this quest, huh?"

You shrugged. "It's all good. There are other, less dangerous quests."

He perked up. "Yeah, so hurry up and get down here! We've gotta get back to Glewnburg!"

You tossed the beanbag you'd had in your hand back into the net. "Comin'." Unfortunately for you, you were a bit of a show-off. You stood, stretching your arms out for balance, walking quickly and carefully across the bough. A loud snap that echoed through the forest silenced everyone: your sudden movements had weakened the branch down the middle, where a split was slowly cracking open.

"Oh shit." Did I have to choose the top branch?

Everything seemed to be in slow motion as you fell. Your ribs exploded with pain as you slammed into a slightly lower branch full-force. Your ankle snapped. Your arms were whipped and bruised. Your head cracked painfully across the thick, unmoveable base of one branch, and white and yellow dots burst in your vision. Your sight started to fade, as did the pain, until you met the ground with a dull thud.

I should've went to college.

~time skip~

When you woke up, the first thing you realized was, Hey, I woke up! I'm alive! which was immediately followed by, Holy fucking shit what the fucking hell did I break, then a much more painful thought of Why the fuck am I still in the goddamn forest? 

And you were. You were laying on your side, in a couple of very small but still immensely terrifying pools of drying blood, one of which came from the corner of your mouth. Your entire body throbbed painfully. Every breath you took caused sharp, white-hot pains to spiderweb across your entire torso. Your ankle was burning up, and you couldn't move it or your left arm. Your head felt like you'd been hit by a truck. A truck made of solid wood...

Why were you still in the forest? You knew your mother well enough to know that she've panicked. She'd've screamed your name and ran to you and called 911 immediately. [F/N] would've done the same. In fact, there was no reason why they wouldn't have called for a medic. You fell from the equivalent of a three-story building with poles sticking out of it.

By all accounts, you should be near death.

So why were you still in the forest, exactly where you'd fell?

With immense effort, you rolled onto your back, panting heavily and wincing against the pain. Your vision swam, and things were blurry. The trees were different; the tree where you'd fallen from was tall and branchless for most of the way up, and definitely not an oak. To boot, there weren't any nets full of beanbags, and your spear was gone. Behind you was  a cliff with an outcropping of rock that looked similar-- but not the same-- to the one [F/N] had been behind. There were roots and underbrush and bushes and walls of thorny branches surrounding you, and in between the ground was filled of orange and gold fallen leaves; up in the canopy, which hadn't been as thick before, the leaves were all dressed for Fall. You stared at it in confusion. "What the hell?" Shit. Even that hurt.

Where were you? Why weren't you in an ambulance with the sirens blaring? You were pretty positive you'd broken quite a few bones, and from that fall, you couldn't not have internal bleeding. So where were you?

You waited, but no one came. When the sky started to darken and the pain began to worsen, you were forced to move, slowly getting up, inch by inch, until you'd managed to be in a sitting position. It felt like all the blood rushed from your head and torso, making you cold in the evening chill. You hugged your right arm to your chest, really wishing you'd've worn arm cuffs or something; your short, high-collared, sleeveless, sky-blue leather jacket over a thin white crop top and a black corset-style belt really weren't meant for chilly weather.

"Hello?" You called out. Your voice carried on, but you got no return call. Blood trickled down your chin from where your lips had rebusted; you were lucky you hadn't bit your tongue off or shattered teeth. "Hey! Help!" Still, nothing. "Hey!"

After a twenty-minute bout of screaming for help, you gave up. You were confused-- so, so, confused. Where were you and why were you here? Where was your family? Where was [F/N]? Where was the coach, and those shitty actors? Hell, where was the rest of the LARP group? You'd even be relieved if Jacob appeared out of nowhere.

The moon had risen by the time you’d made it to your feet. Your ankle wasn't as bad as it was earlier; you could put some weight on it now, even if it wasn't a lot. You must've only sprained it. You tried calling for help a few more times, but only the crickets replied.

Then, they went silent.

You frowned. In books and movies, that was usually a bad sign. What'd caused them to shut up so abruptly? Not aliens, you hoped, like in Signs.

A low growl from behind you-- behind you, dammit-- made your skin crawl. A chill ran down your spine. You turned, slowly, hoping you wouldn't aggravate the wolf or coywolf or whatever it was; it wasn't either of those.

It stood on top of the small cliff, and it was at least the size of a horse. A boar-like coat, dull brown, covered its entire body, spotted in places. Its head was broad and massive, bearing an underbite of fangs and small beady eyes. Drool fell from its jaws as it snarled at you. You were half tempted to try the "Nice doggie" before you seen the rider.

Damn, it was ugly as hell. Small, malformed, with dark green skin and a crooked nose. Greasy, thin hair hung from its wrinkled scalp. Nasty claws protruded from its wart-covered fingers and dug into the horn of some kind of saddle. It sneered with an evil grin, and a mouthful of sharp teeth.

You didn't know what else to do; you took off running at full speed, ignoring the pains shooting up your leg from your sprained ankle. Branches and weeds whipped your skin, trailing blood. You glanced back once. The monster-- which you knew was an orc-- and the giant dog that you couldn't place the name of watched you for a couple of moments more before the orc gave a sharp order in a language you didn't understand, but it felt familiar. Two more of the giant dogs burst from the bushes on either side of the first, and they did give chase. Shit, were they what'd happened to your family? Some whackjob dressed as an orc riding a pitbull on steroids mauled everybody?!

You pushed yourself to run faster. Your heart pounded in your ears. Adrenaline rushed through your veins. Each step jarred your aching body, but you couldn't stop. The dogs were enjoying the chase, keeping their strides slow enough to still be on your heels, but not close enough to get you yet. A new sound-- a river, maybe-- gave you hope, and you tried to move even faster, your lungs burning from the strain.

It was a river you'd heard, but it was down a steep hill filled of arching roots and thorny bushes. You didn't have time to stop; you barreled forward, tripped, and rolled the rest of the way, hurting your body even further. By the time you reached the pebbly shore (With all of the sharp edges of the rocks jabbing into you unnecessarily.), the dogs were halfway down, the orcs riding them laughing like hyenas.

You couldn't swim, but you'd rather take your chances with the river than with the giant pitbulls. You waded in, and were immediately swept off your feet by the strong current. It dragged you under, and you were bashed into some boulders, getting cut up badly. One slammed into your hip, nearly causing you to suck in. Another rammed into your already-broken ribs, and this time, you did scream, getting a huge gulp of water. A crimson cloud engulfed you as something long and sharp burst through your calf. You were pushed up against another boulder, and you grabbed on, hauling yourself out of the water and hanging on for dear life, hacking and coughing out the water that'd filled your lungs.

The dogs had chased you up the shoreline, and the orcs carried shortbows with arrows of dark wood. A glance down and, sure as fuck, they'd hit you with one in the calf, dammit. You looked ahead of you: rapids, a slow and drawn-out death. Ahead of you, probably a very painful death, but hopefully it'd go faster than drowning while being battered to a lifeless corpse.

I should've gone to college.

You squeezed your eyes shut tight and braced yourself for the next arrow, but you were pretty much forced to open them again when you heard the sound of dogs yelping and orcs wailing. One of the dogs was dead, neck slashed open and pouring blood onto the rocks. It had landed on its rider, who struggled beneath its weight. The other dog had taken off, but its rider had an arrow jutting out of its face.

A troop of warriors, clad in forest-colored tunics of dark browns, greens, and grays had appeared in the second you'd closed your eyes. Every one of them had long, straight hair, braided away from their faces. Most had a quiver of arrows and a longbow, but some, like the one who'd killed the dog, had a curved longsword. Others still had long knives. Compared to the dark orcs, these people seemed to almost be made of light...

Oh shit.

Elves. These were Elves.You could see it clearly now, in the way they carried themselves: regal, majestic, every move perfectly balanced and smooth. Their ears were pointed, but not drastically like the ones from Zelda, and they were taller than most average men. You were in awe.

These were some damn good actors.

No, they couldn't be actors. That clicked, finally. Especially when you were able to see the one that'd killed the dog slice off the struggling orc's head cleanly and deftly before kicking it into the river. Thankfully, it didn't come near you.

Shit. These were real orcs, real giant bloodthirsty dogs, real Elves... This was all real. But how...?

You heard the sound of a bowstring being pulled taut, much closer to you. You couldn't exactly whip around in your current state, but you still moved as fast as you could. Another Elf, standing on the flat rocks halfway across the river, no less than thirty feet away. How the hell did he get there?!

After the initial shock passed, you realized there was an arrow nocked in the bow. You'd already felt one once in the last ten minutes, you didn't need to feel it again, so you stayed still. He watched you with eyes so blue you could see them from where you were. He was illuminated from the side by the moon, giving him an almost ethereal appearance. His hair was somewhere between platinum and very light blonde, and a quiver of orange-feathered arrows hung over two identical sheaths for ivory-handled long knives. His bow was almost as gorgeous as he was: dark wood engraved with golden leaf designs. His tunic was dark green, and you admired his fancy Elven belts and buckles and bracers for a second before your eyes were drawn back to his face, the profile of which was almost... Dished, in a way, like an Arabian horse's. Your eyes locked, and you felt as if you'd seen him somewhere before...

An Elf on the shoreline spoke, breaking the trance. You couldn't understand what exactly he said; you could've swore you knew some Elvish...

The Elf staring you down watched you for a minute longer, then jerked his bow toward you in gesture, shouting an order to one of his comrades. His voice sounded so familiar... It was on the tip of your brain... It was deep and soft and gentle and commanding all at once. You couldn't explain it. Two Elves followed his order, nimbly leaping from tiny rock to tiny rock to get to where he was, then past him, coming to you. Their weapons were sheathed, so you hoped they were going to help you instead of kicking you into the water or something.

Carefully, noticing how banged up you were, they grabbed you underneath of the arms and lifted you onto the flat rocks the blue-eyed Elf stood on, still ready to fire, and stepped back as you coughed up some water in a delayed reaction to nearly drowning.

When you finished, your eyes felt like they wanted to close on their own. You felt too tired, too weak, too pained... Despite that, you sat up, shivering in the chilly evening air. "Th-thank you..." With a start, you realized they might not even understand English.

"Who are you?" The blue-eyed Elf demanded. "Answer me quickly; do not think we cannot throw you back to the river."

Shit. Pressure. Suddenly you forgot your name for a split second. "I-I'm [Y/N]."

"What are you doing in these lands?"

"I was chased," You looked pointedly at the dog and orc.

The Elf watched you for a minute, judging you... He signaled. "Throw them back into the river." Suddenly, you were being dragged.

Aw, fuck. You struggled against the Elf's strong grips. "W-wait! I don't even know where I am! The last thing I knew I was playing a game with my family and I fell out of a tree! All of a sudden I'm being chased by giant dogs and being manhandled by a couple of Elvish pri--!" You were cut off by a bought of coughing that wracked your body so hard that you doubled in on yourself, pulling the Elves down with you. Your eyes widened when blood trickled out of your mouth, leaving crimson droplets on the rocks. Shit.

The blue-eyed Elf ordered something in their tongue, and the two dragging you halted on a dime. He finally decided to lower his bow a little, inspecting you. "Are there more of you?"

You shook your head; you were getting dizzy, and your vision was blacking out. "I-I don't know... I was alone when I woke up."

The Elves conversed in their own language for a few minutes, and the blue-eyed Elf finally came to the conclusion that you weren't much of a threat in your current state. He looked to the Elves on the shoreline, and gestured at one of the ones holding you, who then scooped you up bridal style, but like you were the ugliest bride he'd ever seen. "Und win'doheim!" Shouted the blue-eyed Elf, obviously the one in charge, and lead the progression back to the forest.

I should never have gotten out of bed today...

Despite the crazy situation, you managed to doze off a few times on the Elf that carried you, until a coughing fit or pain would wake you up. A fever spiked up as you crossed a bridge, and you were half out of it as you entered some kind of woody building surrounded by trees and rivers that you couldn't comprehend very well in your feverish state. You were panting and wheezing, and couldn't see straight. It all seemed so surreal, like you were viewing this from somebody else's perspective. This had to be a dream... A very vivid, very painful dream...

The last thing you remembered was Elvish chanting, golden and white lights surrounding you, and the silhouettes of the Elves. Your pain faded, and you fell into a forced sleep.

When you woke up, a breath of relief whooshed out of your lungs. It was a dream! It was all a dream! It was night, and your nighlight had gone out, but your hall light was still on. You turned over to see what time it was, but your nightstand was gone. So was your window, and shelves and desk and computer and all of your things. Your bed was different. Your relief dissipated to terror.

Fuck. It wasn't a dream.

You were in a small room. An orange-hued light came through the low doorway, and the dark walls were ridged, as if carved from the earth itself. You felt the remains of your injuries from earlier-- or days ago, you couldn't tell how much time had passed-- as throbbing remains. Your clothes were still ripped and bloodstained, and as you stood up, it felt like you were just coming off of the flu.

Wobbly, you staggered over to the doorway, hoping to find somebody that definitely wasn't an orc or Elf.

You slammed face-first into elaborately crafted iron bars.

Outside of them, fully-armored Elves patrolled on small ledges beside the spiraling rows upon rows of cells like yours. This was a dungeon.

...Well shit.

Tag List: @tesserphantom​ @thedragonghostofmordor​ @taurlel @hauntedsiriel

[rebelsofshield]

Far Far Away Comics: 9/23/20-10/12/20

Oh wow. Look what I did. I missed several weeks of Star Wars comics again. I promise this shouldn’t be a pattern. Hopefully. We’ll see.

Anyways, here are multiple weeks worth of Star Wars comic reviews featuring every major series that IDW and Marvel are releasing right now.

Star Wars #7 written by Charles Soule and art by Ramon Rosanas (Released on 10/7/20)

After a stellar conclusion to his first arc, Charles Soule moves forward with his second major storyline in Star Wars with a showdown between a scattered rebellion and a new Imperial enemy.

With the Rebellion still recuperating after its routing at Hoth, Leia tries desperately to not only reconnect with the disparate Alliance groups but also strike back at the Imperial forces hot on their tail. Unfortunately for Leia, Commander Zahra leads the Imperial fleet tasked with this mission and she has a bone to pick with the former Alderaanian princess.

Charles Soule has more than shown that he excels at writing villains. His takes on Darth Vader and Kylo Ren have become character defining story arcs and even some of his best work on Poe Dameron came in the exploration of the hapless First Order Intelligence Agent Terex. Now, Soule gets to introduce a new antagonist of his own making and she’s pretty stellar. Commander Zahra is introduced as not only a calculating and cunning Imperial naval commander, but also one that has a cruel streak to her and a need for vengeance. Her past connections to a Wilhuff Tarkin display an unexpected but consistently menacing take to this classic Imperial officer. It makes for a surprising and engaging issue even if it mostly amounts to an extended flashback to catch us up to speed on Leia’s newest nemesis.

Thankfully, the match up should prove interesting. Not only do Leia’s actions at the Battle of Yavin give Zahra a personal vendetta, Soule also positions Leia in a role where she can demonstrate her skills as a military commander. It puts the Rebellion and the Empire on close to equal footing which is a fun spin on a story that could have easily felt like a retread of Kieron Gillen’s outstanding “Hope Dies.”

Ramon Rosanas takes over for Jesus Saiz this issue and while his work doesn’t have the detailed flair of the comic’s usual artist, his pencils live up to the visual style established by the series. He particularly excels at large scale action scenes displaying expansive fleet combat with a sense of size and scoped. His characters prove slightly less impressive with a tendency to draw characters in the same stern mood throughout.

Overall, Soule and Rosanas have set up a strong follow up to the series’ standout first arc and set up one hell of a confrontation to come. Let’s see some blaster bolts fly.

Score: B+

Star Wars Adventures #1 written by Michael Moreci and Nick Brokenshire and art by Nick Brokenshire and Ilias Kyrias (Released on 10/12/20)

Yup, you read that right. Star Wars Adventures is starting fresh with a shiny new #1. The reasoning for this isn’t quite clear for as far as I can tell, the series is operating with close to the same status quo as it has been from the start. Offer two all ages stories of adventure set in the Star Wars universe with lots of colorful art. Even the stories feel like a neat continuation of the ones we were getting in  our pre-Covid reality. Regardless, new numbering or not, Star Wars Adventures remains its same charming self. Bursting with energy and good natured enthusiasm, it’s still one of the best Star Wars comics out there.

The meat of the issue follows a story of Finn, Poe, and Rey set between The Last Jedi and The Rise of Skywalker. Any story following the sequel trilogy trio is appreciated and Michael Moreci crafts an enjoyable little tale of Finn and Poe trying their best to assist Rey in her new steps into Jedi training. Of course, being Star Wars, things never go as easily as planned and soon the crew run a foul of some pirates. It’s definitely fun to get to see some of our three heroes together and one can’t help but wish that maybe the adventures of Rey, Poe, and Finn could be a regular feature. Ilias Kyrias’s pencils are sure to be controversial with their overly stylized proportions and character designs, but they make for a unique looking story and capture some of the energetic action of the piece with a cartoony flair that feels right at home with the Adventures mission statement. It’s not going to be for everyone, but it hardly needs to be.

The one tangible difference between this volume and the previous is that the fun but static “Tales from Wild Space” has been replaced with a different back up feature, “Tales from Villainy.” As the name would suggest, these are shorter and more serious stories focused on the various members from the Dark Side. This week, we begin with an appearance by Darth Vader written and drawn by Nick Brokenshire. The result is a fun, well-drawn little bit centered on Vader’s role in the Battle of Hoth. Brokenshire renders Vader with a PG rated wordless intensity and the result is fun and dynamic even if there isn’t a lot of dramatic meat to chew on.

Score: B

Star Wars Adventures: The Clone Wars Battle Tales (Released on 9/30/2020) written by Michael Moreci and art by Derek Charm and Philip Murphy

Over its unnaturally extended run, Star Wars Adventures: The Clone Wars Battle Tales proved to be a surprisingly entertaining little tribute to the fan favorite animated series. With a gorgeous looking frame story by Derek Charm and creative clone centric anthology stories, Battle Tales was both colorful and surprisingly smart, often times telling stories that felt surprisingly more consequential than the standard Adventures outing.

Unfortunately, its finale ends with a bit of a whimper. It’s not that this final outing by Michael Moreci, Derek Charm, and Philip Murphy is bad. Not by any means. It’s just as colorful and delightful as any other Adventures comic. But that ultimately proves to be its biggest disappointment. After several issues of meeting and exceeding the expectations of a standard Adventures script, writer Michael Moreci more or less falls back to familiar tricks. It’s fun to see Obi-Wan and Commander Cody team up with ice Ewoks to fight General Grievous, but it’s not something particularly new to this brand and it doesn’t expand on the clone’s understanding of the Jedi like the previous issues have. It’s fun and Moreci seems more than content to leave it at that.

After weeks of build up, the finale to the Battle Tales frame story ends with little fanfare. There’s not much of a conclusion to speak of and lacks the artistic or storytelling fun of some of the previous Adventures mini-series heights like Vader’s Castle.

I still would recommend this series to any fan of The Clone Wars, but not as emphatically as I may have a few weeks back. There’s definitely joy and explosions to be had, but in the end, they turn out to be the familiar kind. As odd as that is to say.

Score: C+

Star Wars Bounty Hunters #5 written by Ethan Sacks and art by Paolo Villanelli (Released on 9/23/20)

Bounty Hunters is back for more face slamming violence, cool character designs, and questionable choices.

With Boba Fett, Vance Beilert, and Boba Fett all locked together in a close quarters space ship, the truth of their mission to Corellia all those years ago is finally out and it turns out it was a bit of a mess all around. Sure, Nakano’s act of mercy may have been the first act of chaos, but Vance Beilert’s inexperience and Fett’s bloodlust lead to the thorny crime war that they all find themselves involved in now.

It’s a smart idea, but it all feels a little cluttered. Ethan Sacks’s script looks to not only give us the full truth of the disastrous Corellia job, but also flesh out Nakano Lash’s past and also wrap up the double crossing bounty hunter beatdown that has dominated this arc so far. As a result, it all ends up feeling a bit confused and there often isn’t much of a clear thread to carry the reader through. The continued presence of violence against women as a central plot point to this series also can’t help but feel off putting at this point. Sure, Bounty Hunters is a brutal book, but when you have two issues in a row of new female characters killed off and imperiled pregnant women, it begins to feel in poor taste.

Thankfully, Paolo Villanelli is there to distract us with some gorgeous art and brilliant fight sequences. Villanelli along with colorist Arif Printo still manages that magic trick of providing dynamic action sequences that feel violent and energetic without ever losing detail or clarity. The smackdown between Vance and Boba Fett is particularly satisfying, with both hunters employing all members of their arsenal for some great panels of punching, slashing, and blasting.

It can’t all just be cool fights though. Bounty Hunters is going to have to really start digging into its characters and fix its creeping misogyny if its going to be a must read comic, but as it stands, this a book best rifled through. Look at the pictures, wince at the fights, and put it back.

Score: C+

Star Wars: Darth Vader #6 written by Greg Pak and art by Raffaele Ienco (Released on 10/12/20)

Darth Vader’s been bad. Well, not the right kind of bad. Turns out that failing to turn your son to the Dark Side and running of on a personal crusade to discover the truth about your deceased wife, isn’t the best look for a Sith Lord. And Ol’ Palpy sure ain’t happy.

Greg Pak and Raffaele Ienco provide some interesting personal consequence for Vader after the over the top and sometimes emotionally clouded first arc. With Sidious’s apprentice once again letting him down when his assistance is most needed, the Emperor unleashes a painful and total punishment. The resulting issue is a brutal and humiliating stripping away of the life that the former Anakin Skywalker has built for himself. Palpatine looks to make Vader rebuild himself from the ground up if his place in the Empire is to continue. It’s a simple read, but one that carries big consequences for the character down the line and some smart connections to The Rise of Skywalker. (Maybe Pak can help us make sense of that mess.)

Raffaele Ienco turns in his best work to date here. Ienco draws a creepy as hell Palpatine and his take on Mas Amedda feels both intimidating and appropriately slimey. Ienco also manages to nail Vader’s emotions here. The awkward sad face mask from issues past is stripped away and some smart framing and posing makes for a Sith who has clearer emotional depth while keeping the violent menace of his character.

This issue itself may be rather simple, but it sets up an exciting second arc for the series and even some long lasting emotional implications for our broken and battered Sith anti-hero. Let’s see how this burns.

Score: B

Star Wars Doctor Aphra #4 written by Alyssa Wong and art by Marika Cresta (Released on 9/30/20)

The second volume of Star Wars Doctor Aphra continues to disappoint. The decision to revert back to Aphra’s tomb raiding roots is a smart one and Alyssa Wong is undoubtedly a smart writer to spearhead the character’s next chapter, but four issues in and this comic is still sputtering out the gate. Maybe I have just too high of expectations for this character given how stellar Kieron Gillen and Simon Spurrier’s writing was for the last several years, but something about this latest volume is failing to connect.

It may be that after four issues the majority of the characters are failing to really congeal into anything substantial. We finally get some backstory on Just Lucky that adds a bit more drama to his betrayal last issue, but it still feels too little too late. The numerous hidden agendas throughout the first several issues may have done more harm than good as it kept the characters too distant and now that we know their true goals, the circumstances are too chaotic to really get a sense of person.

Aphra herself also feels like a bit of an afterthought here. While previous Aphra stories have certainly been full of big action and big ideas, they still came around to being morality stories about our lonely, morally bankrupt title character. I’m not clear what Wong is trying to say about Aphra here. In fact, at times she feels like something of an afterthought.

There are some bright spots though. Wong’s spooky approach to space archaeology still feels eerie and inventive in all the right ways, and one can’t help but wish that maybe she had leaned into it harder and delivered a Doctor Aphra cosmic horror comic.

Marika Cresta’s pencils prove serviceable. Her character designs are for the most part still largely unimpressive even if she gives surprising life to some of the Tagge henchmen. Like Wong though, Cresta is best served by all things ancient. Whether it’s old spaceships or ancient tombs, Cresta brings eerie and sometimes beautiful detail to the galactic old world.

Now if only Doctor Aphra could get its mind off the past and more into the brains of our main cast.

Score: C