#Even though it's frustrating and I don't like to do it . . . Do it anyway
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I've always thought charles unfollowed him in silent rage while they're flying together after Austria 19 but the clip you posted when max said that charles was like 'its like this' and he replied 'I understand' makes me think that he might actually ask for permission? give explanation? to unfollow max. And max agreed. And that might also be why they never fly together again ever since, but still be seen together doing debrief and generally being civil, though a bit awkward. I think I saw a clip of them on TikTok walking together, they're the only 2 drivers while surrounded by some cameras, and talking the whole way through, a month after Austria 19.
Tbh I wonder what that conversation on the plane entails. I don't think charles only said 'its like this' and then that's it. It's possible yes, since that's one of charles' favorite phrase. But I just wonder if they made some promise like let's only follow each other again after we're both champions. Or something like since we're gonna be direct competitors let's not start investing in deeper friendship between us so it's not gonna blow up, but we can still debrief like usual. And that's why they chose to never hang out (this changed now of course after last year). Or idk I just really want to be a fly on the wall in that whole conversation because max clearly didn't want to explain it further because it's personal.
Anyways just really want to know if them refusing to follow each other even though they clearly keep up with the other's social media is just them thinking it's funny to keep doing it or if it is them feeling like they should honor the promise/conversation they made on that plane.
i think this is the vid you're talking about! tbh max says they werent alone in the plane, probably had to keep their cool/ not cause a scene, and we know Charles is a bit passive aggressive, so that was his way of showing frustration, unfollowing.
Max still had control on his socials but I don't see him asking about it once he realizes Charles unfollowed/ blocked him. they were biting each other even in post race interviews. it was more of a thin ice than being vulnerable to go ask "why did you do that"
And about airmax, always amazes me how they werent so close but Charles flew with him even after the battle- but also, why was he invited at the first place too. they weren't that close. also charles wasnt looking at maxs face on the podium- this was his face lol.
after that, and he wasnt that mature back then, I dont think it was a very sincere "it's like this/its ok". Not to remind that charles was on Max's ass at silverstone/ japan, seething with anger. he was still mad. he was livid, but given 20/21s ferrari, and Max's title battle, he calmed down, and matured more. stopped bringing on track to off track, and started to enjoy debriefs, drivers parades, at least for max.
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Tw: death (obv)
There are four people left on the server. By some miracle, Lizzie and Jimmy are half of them. To no one's surprise, Joel and Gem are the other half.
Each team was at their base, gearing up.
"We're not walking away from this fight, Lizzie," Jimmy murmured.
They were sitting shoulder-to-shoulder on the bed Scar once shared with Grian, only a few short days ago. It felt like lifetimes.
"We could do this," Lizzie assured him, but she didn't sound as confident as she normally would.
What if they just didn't go? What if the Toretto's stayed at their stupid car and the Bamboozlers stayed on their hill and nothing happened? Would the world itself bend over backwards to get them together? Would the next wildcard start picking them off one by one?
It wouldn't matter anyway. Joel would never just give up a win, and Gem couldn't resist getting a kill. They would come, and Jimmy and Lizzie would be the ones who paid for it.
Jimmy couldn't help but suggest, "Maybe we could hide? We could lie low until they kill each other from frustration."
"That wouldn't work." Lizzie always had to burst his bubble. She was as bad as Grian with spoiling his perfectly good plans sometimes.
"The Bam-bunker is pretty secure!" Jimmy pushed. "We could stay there, they'd never find us!"
Lizzie gave him a small chuckle. "If Etho can find us in there, Gem and Joel definitely can."
Jimmy sighed. "D'you reckon they're already in their way?"
"I would say, almost definitely."
Before Lizzie had finished speaking, the chat lit up:
Smallishbeans was slain by a skeleton
Lizzie gasped. "Joel!"
"Yes!" Jimmy crowed, leaping to his feet, all his previous doom and gloom forgotten. Joel was out.
"That still leaves Gem, though," Lizzie reminded him.
"We can take Gem! There's two of us, she can't fight off two of us!"
"She was fighting off five of us before she was even allowed to kill. Now-"
"She wasn't fighting." Jimmy wasn't used to being the voice of positivity when it came to a fight, especially against such an overpowered opponents, but he was riding the high of Joel's demise. "She was just running, then, so we couldn't reach her. She'll be trying to fight us, now, so she'll stay in reach."
"Yeah." Slowly, Lizzie started to smile as well. She joined him in standing. "Yeah! We got this!"
"We got this!" Jimmy echoed.
They're celebration was cut short by a voice from the stairs. "Oh, do you now?"
Gem.
They both stopped jumping around, freezing like a pair of deer in headlights.
"Was that just a normal skeleton?" Lizzie asked.
"Yes!" Gem threw her arms up (shield on one, sword clutched in the other) in exasperation. "A normal, natural spawning skeleton!"
Jimmy burst out laughing. "Ha! That's what you get for messing with us!"
"He didn't even mess with us, Jimmy," Lizzie sighed.
Gem started walking towards them, and both siblings put up their shields, instantly nervous. Without warning, Gem lurched towards Jimmy.
Jimmy shrieked, panicked, and ran. He could hear Gem's laughter as she chased him, Lizzie's shouts as she chased Gem. He tried to leap over a chest, hoping to duck behind the piled chests beside it to catch his breath, but his foot caught on lid, sending him crashing to the ground with a yelp.
Jimmy rolled over so he was on his back and hefted his shield up just as Gem descended on him.
"You're gonna die, Jimmy!" She was still laughing, grinning, breathless, her eyes alight with the thrill of the kill.
"No!" Jimmy gasps, waving his sword uselessly at her.
Gem lifted her sword, ready to plunge it into him, and-
Stiffened.
She looked down, her grin frozen on her face in shock. Jimmy followed her gaze to see the tip of a sword sticking out of her chest.
His eyes flicked over her shoulder to see Lizzie standing there, tears in her eyes, her hands shaking in the hilt of her sword.
"Don't touch him!" she ordered, though with the fear in her voice, it sounded more like begging than anything else.
"No, no," Gem whispered. "It can't end like this."
"Oh yes, it can," Jimmy told her.
Both women gasped as Lizzie yanked the sword out of Gem. Jimmy didn't have time to move before Gem landed on him.
He yelped and scrambled to the side, away from her.
"Jimmy!" Lizzie scolded, hurrying to his side.
She turned Gem over so she was lying on her back.
"I'm so sorry!" Lizzie told her.
Gem met her eyes, and died.
Just like that, they'd survived fighting the Torettos. Just like that, they were the last two.
"Jimmy, we did it!" Triumph was already tinging her voice, like that was it, like it was all over now.
"Well, you did it," Jimmy conceded, unable to feel the same victory as her.
There was still one enemy left.
With a heavy heart and trembling hands, he drew his sword.
Lizzie frowned as he stood up, following him. "Jimmy? What are you doing?"
"There can only be one winner." He didn't want to do it. Hell, he really wished there was any other way this could go. But there wasn't.
"Oh." Lizzie picked her sword - the blue stained red already - up off the ground. "So. How do you want to do this?"
"I guess we just... fight."
"I guess we do."
Neither of them wanted to make the first move. Neither wanted to attack the other player. Jimmy went first, swinging at her with a grunt.
Lizzie squealed and blocked with her shield, and the fight was on.
Surrounded on all sides by bamboo, on soil that they had tended themselves for weeks, months even, Jimmy and Lizzie fought.
Jimmy could see, he could see so clearly how it would go, how it had to go. But still, he fought. He fought to win. He fought to kill his own sister, just like she was fighting to kill him.
And then, as he backed away to try and preserve his final heart for one second more, his back hit a tree.
Time seemed to slow. Lizzie was staring at him through tear-filled eyes as she swung her sword for the final time.
It made a strange sort of sense, Jimmy thought, that this was the way it would go. She had broken his curse - she deserved this win. And yet, he couldn't help the grief for himself. He was so close, so so close, to a win, only to have it snatched at the last second.
He tried one final attack, his sword missing Lizzie by inches, before her sword reached his chest.
This was a sensation he was very familiar with. He'd always been good at dying, at living out his days to their end. He supposed he was lucky he'd had this many, this time around.
He watched from above, one of far many ghosts, as Lizzie fell to her knees beside Jimmy, hugging him tight to her chest.
For the first time, the Canary signaled not the start of the danger, but the end.
Shoulders heaving, Lizzie took her sword and shoved it through her own stomach, freeing herself from this prison.
The world breathed a sigh of relief as the killing stopped.
"Jimmy should die third"
"Jimmy needs to win this season"
No youre all wrong. He needs to get second place. Think about how funny that would be.
#step 1: be normal about Seablings final 2#...#failed step 1#ashlley writes#wild life spoilers#kinda#technically#hopefully#jimmy#Lizzie#Gem#Joel#solidaritygaming#ldshadowlady#geminitay#smallishbeans#wild Life smp
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mouthwashing responsibility au rambles below cut 🫡
(spoiler warning for the actual game obviously)
- even though jimmy got deservedly knocked out by anya and thrown into the cryopod early on, the crash still does happen. it's a freak accident this time, like maybe a piece of space debris just happened to hurtle right into them without time to dodge. it's like the tulpar is destined to crash. but this time it's a story about a group of people finding hope and strength in each other and finding what they themselves can be capable of in a time of crisis. btw i just mean curly, anya, swansea, and daisuke. i am NOT repenting jimmy. he ain't "fixing" shit.
- i'm sorry for frying curly again even though this is supposed to be an au with a happier ending 😭 the way his loss of autonomy reflects anya's own loss of it, making him feel firsthand the suffering she went through in a way, felt too important to just remove. curly's injuries aren't as terrible as in the original timeline since swansea rescued him earlier. and by "not as terrible" i mean he only loses a leg and not all of his limbs. he will get some function in his hands eventually and anya teaches him sign language to help him communicate (she teaches the others too).
- speaking of anya, she really shows her stuff as a nurse (even in the original timeline she does, managing to keep curly alive like that). she treats curly and swansea and is much more of a pillar of strength for the crew than she herself realizes. pre-crash and post-jimmy-getting-fired, she was able to relax and open up more with everyone, building a stronger bond. when the crash happens, anya is of course terrified and hella stressed, but now she knows she has people who have her back, and it helps. she can be more confident in herself without a certain someone being there to belittle and hurt her. this time when she has to deal with something difficult, something traumatizing, she has people to support her. in this au, she is not pregnant because if she was, i don't see how keeping the baby would be a good thing for her. and i don't want her to have to deal with that situation without the proper medical supplies on top of everything else. she's been through enough.
- btw there is no shipping in this au. i personally really don't see how it could happen between anyone on the crew. if there was some sort of spark between anya and curly, it's definitely gone now and won't happen again. the most they'll be are friends (although the friendship/trust will have to be built from the ground up again after everything that's happened with jimmy). the only ship here is the tulpar.
- i know daisuke is seen as a "dumb kid" but i really don't think that's the case. we are seeing him thru jimmy's perspective mostly after all and jimmy is the definition of an unreliable narrator. i headcanon daisuke as having adhd like me who tends to lose focus on tasks easily because your brain is just going 102929 miles a minute and wandering to all sorts of places like me. he feels like someone who doesn't exactly know where they want to go in life like me. also he's definitely a hawaii kid born and raised and talks pidgin sometimes like me except i lost the pidgin :(. i'm totally not projecting my asian ass on the asian boy or anything. BUT ANYWAY i wanted to give daisuke more stuff to do and a chance to prove to himself that he can do these things, he can step up. so that's partially why i made swansea burn his hands rescuing curly. daisuke can now be filled with Determination and be swansea's hands in repairing things as he heals. it's going to be hard and it's going to be frustrating for both parties and sometimes they'll get upset at each other. but it will inevitably be a great bonding experience for the two. i cannot resist the call for more father-son moments.
- swansea my beloved. i am so sorry for burning your beautiful hands please forgive 😔🙏 i have to make my faves suffer a little. swansea's hands will heal up eventually and he'll be able to use them again, but there will be scars. i think him having to guide daisuke with doing repairs n stuff on the ship as his hands recover gives him a mission. something to distract him from completely falling into despair and alcoholism. that man is hanging on by a thread but by god he's going to help get these kids through this. they've all grown closer since jimmy was sacked and swansea feels a sort of responsibility towards protecting anya, daisuke and curly as the oldest one there. it's the dad instincts y'know? on the real hard days, sometimes swansea thinks about cracking open a bottle of mouthwash, but he holds back because he feels he needs to stay strong for the crew. however he does have to learn that he can't shoulder everything and that he can rely on others. him having no choice but to have daisuke take over his tasks is a good way for him to learn that, i think. swansea is definitely a pillar of strength in this and the rest of the crew have a lot of affection for him (and vice versa even if swansea won't admit it). can you tell i really like swansea. he is such a foil to jimmy—a guy who has fucked up a lot in his life but actually acknowledges his mistakes and is trying his hardest to be a better person. aghh swansea i love you 💛💛
- after the crash happens, the cryopod room becomes inaccessible, so nobody is able to check on the state of jimmy in there. so they don't see that the crypod he's in eventually fails from damage and he escapes. this happens a couple weeks into the crash. jimmy is still pissed about everything and still can't see how he's done anything wrong (this is because he is a delusional asshole). in fact, he feels like he's the one who's been wronged and betrayed by everyone on the crew and he wants revenge. there will be a final confrontation between jimmy and the crew. spoilers: jimmy loses. i'm just undecided on who finishes it. it would be fitting if anya shot him, but i'm not sure that's something she'd necessarily want to do. she chose to be in the medical field after all. don't get me wrong, i think she would pull the trigger if it meant protecting the others. but i'd hate to have her kill, because even if jimmy deserves it, anya is a healer and would still probably feel guilty about it. i don't want to put even more shit on her plate. so i think swansea is the one to put jimmy down in the end. with the axe of course. i think he'd feel less guilty about doing it because it's something he's wanted to do since anya first told him about jimmy. oooh what if jimmy gets his hands on the gun, but daisuke tackles him, making him drop it, and anya gets it and shoots jimmy in the shoulder or leg or something to get him off of daisuke, and then swansea comes in with the axe to finish him off. that could be fun. that way anya won't have to actually kill but she'll still get to shoot jimmy. bless.
- the crew gets rescued eventually, but it's going to be a few months because pony express is a nightmare company. i'm honestly still not sure if pony express is even the one who will rescue them or even bother to look. i'm tempted to just have another ship happen across them by some miracle and help. real tempted to make that ship The Unreliable and turn this into a Mouthwashing x The Outer Worlds crossover quite honestly since both settings share similarities (megacorporations, cryosleep, etc). but idk. it's not like i can just write a fanfic or anything since writing is harder for me and who knows how long it will be before i even draw the idea. it's just yet another self-indulgent daydream for now.
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Kat's "I could fix her" Arcane season 2 post Part 1:
Yeah we're skipping straight past the recap/reflections on what this show actually was into my 'just let me into the writers room' post because I'm currently tormented by, ironically, what could have been
What's funny is the characters didn't even end up doomed by the narrative because of their League of Legends fates!! They killed a whole bunch of champions! They just Did All That anyway.
As I was saying in previous posts, the season was overstuffed. I genuinely liked some of the music video portions lol, but there was just so much going on.
I still would put Mel in a Magic Coma for the entire season and spin out her Black Rose plot for a third season or new spinoff (it seems like there will be one anyway). Her storyline as is felt like an afterthought and wasn't fully explained. Am I supposed to know the Black Rose lady? I don't. Being crammed in does her a disservice; I'd rather give her room to breathe. This would create a stronger absent mother/absent daughter bond between Ambessa and Caitlyn, and Caitlyn could see Ambessa claiming to do things for her daughter's sake even though it's obviously stuff Mel would never approve of, and that could force Caitlyn to reflect on how her mother wouldn't approve of the actions she's taking allegedly for her sake. That could sell Caitlyn's immediately re-siding with Vi better.
This may be a very hot take, but I didn't really like the werewolf Vander plotline. My understanding is he's a LoL champion, but he felt particularly cartoonish even in an increasingly cartoonish season, and just kept retreading the same ground. Vander's dead. :( He's alive! :) He's dead again. :( Obviously the cycles are part of the point, and he represents how Vander's death is this monstrous always dying never at rest force between the sisters tying them together and strangling them at the same time, but I'd cut it. Have Vi seek Jinx out after the prison break because she can't believe her sister did that, have Jinx admit she only did it to save one girl, and they reflect on how Vander also did stuff just for kids versus ideals. Make Vi reflect on how her little jaunt with Jayce killed a kid, and here Jinx is saving one, and people are complicated. Still not clear on how Jinx has no negative effects from Shimmer, so give her a few and that can be their new reason for going to Viktor's commune. Ambessa can hear about his new weird magitech without needing a werewolf to pique her interest.
Obviously this raises of the question of what Vi and Jinx are doing in the finale, and while I don't think every character needs a big damn fight scene, they can back up Caitlyn versus Ambessa since Mel won't be there, which also forces them to deal with the Vi-Caitlyn-Jinx tension. IDK if there's a way to have Jinx ambiguously blow herself up in that scenario but here's a thought, maybe the most prominently disabled characters don't all need to die and/or commit suicide? More on that later. Ambessa is subdued, not dead, though, so she and Mel can talk later.
Finally (for this post) I already expressed my frustration that the key class conflict so present in the first season and first half of the second gets mostly shoved under the rug because there's a new enemy to fight. Yes, that's often used as a distraction irl, but that's not a *good* thing. Sevika's sitting at the councilor's table at the end of the show. Who negotiated that? Caitlyn? If we absolutely must go the direction of a big damn final battle, I want to see that conversation and all of the pain and distrust that must've come up during it.
That's the kid gloves version. If I was being aggressive - and I would be - I'd have the fighting totally destroy Piltover with arcane corruption, and now everyone from Piltover has to live in the Undercity/Zaun as refugees. Forget Sevika sitting down at the Piltover table as the new councilors glare at her. Now the Piltover councilors are having to sit awkwardly down at a table with Sevika and Ekko's number 2. (Or Ekko. What is he doing besides sitting sadly on that roof. Is he involved in governance. Is his tree ok.) Piltover suffocated Zaun for years with their industrial runoff. Now they're choking to death on their own magical industrial waste, and they're going to have to learn to live like everybody else.
I am still parsing the whole Viktor, Jayce, and disability thing since as you know that's one of the elements that fascinates me most about this show (the new improved crunchy ableism even as they genuinely try to explore something interesting) so I will be typing a separate post about that, probably thinking through it as I write. Stay tuned.
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grabbing fistfuls of my own hair rocking back and forth repeating to myself like some kind of fucked up wizardly enchantment you should care about womens sports because its literally the same fucking sport why do i have to bend over backwards to convince you to care about womens sports like at an abstract level it is the exact same fucking thing and yet you cannot bear to possibly watch it unless you think the women are hot or there is some sort of social gain why is it so hard for you to care about womens sports when they are literally doing all of it better than the men
#i stand by my belief that womens sports are more entertaining anyways but i know that is somewhat personal preferences so ok! fine!#but they are the same then!#obviously yes there are legit differences in ~style~ and such based on the way different sports have evolved#ex: female basketballers are statistically better shooters than male basketballers#but like the sport itself is practically identical so why is it so fucking impossible for some people#to get interested in a sport they claim they love#just because women are doing it#i'm not sitting here like 'mmm how do i convince people to watch women's sport' like a legit plot#i'm just baffled i really don't understand#i mean i do understand of course but i'm just tired of it being this way lol#i want to talk to more people who have the level of brainrot i have about women's sports and it feels like everyone i know well#is just not that interested in the women even though they're interested in the men#of course there are people online but i get self-conscious and i don't know anyone well enough to truly go to the depths of my own brainrot#this is just a combination of genuine frustration but also my own loneliness lol#< wayyy more dramatic than it actually is for the record i'm not like lonely lonely#i just want someone who actually understands why i go nuts over this and who i feel comfortable spamming about it 😭#blah blah blah words
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i think the main issue in arguing with zionists is that, well, they believe in zionism! if israel did deserve to exist, then the genocide and injustice in palestine could be argued for (not like it should be, but it certainly could) -- and zionists believe israel deserves to exist.
i, unfortunately, have a large amount of experience interacting (personally) with zionism and zionists. most of those i've talked to feel for the palestinians, and the violence they are facing, but they fail to realize (or they staunchly deny) the very, very active part israel and the IDF have had in that -- and how it's representative of what the nation has always done.
at the same time, they focus more on israeli hostages than palestinian ones -- and i know, of course, that these zionist jews i've interacted with are either israeli or have loved ones in israel, and so have a very personal stake in the safety of israeli hostages (which may very well be friends or family members), but i find it strange how much emphasis they put on hamas' cruelty in taking hostages while the IDF is doing the same thing (in essence; the exact details of who's doing it worse are important to note, but not relevant right now, because folks should realize that their side is being at least as cruel as the enemy's).
recently i was drawn into an argument with an israeli zionist (who, unfortunately, is very close to the action and tragedy by being israeli), and she was incredibly offended by my anti-zionism and my opposition to israel's abject cruelty to palestinian citizens, as it seemed (to her) like i was bypassing the cruelty hamas has enacted on israeli citizens -- which is very telling. i've noticed that we as jews have the tendency, whatever the situation may be, of focusing more on our pain than the pain of others, even if we are the ones hurting them. that person has every reason to be scared and hurt, and i'd be lying if i said her response wasn't at least somewhat sympathetic, but her pain in this horrible, violent conflict does not invalidate the pain on the other side. jews, throughout this recent crisis, have consistently not talked in depth about the constant losses in palestine -- am i suddenly being callous by focusing on those losses, and not our own? (YOUR PAIN AND THEIRS AREN'T MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE, YOU DOLT! sorry...)
because it all comes down to believing in israel! my mom has always told me about how beautiful it is there, about her time living on a kibbutz... and sure, it might be nice. i can't argue with that. but why is it that our nationalism for israel is so strong, so virulent? i have not seen patriots as loyal for any other country. and when you criticize israel, israelis feel like you're criticizing their entire existence -- and many non-israeli jews do, as well. because zionism has been built so deep into the modern religion! it's made to be a necessary piece! belief in it is the default!
and, from the inside looking in, i can't be surprised that many jews take anti-zionism as being antisemitic -- because, to them, israel and zionism stand as the pinnacle of safety and support for the jewish people. it is impossible to argue with them about anything above that base layer, as the base layer itself serves as a foundation: so long as a jew thinks that israel is right, deserved, and necessary, no proof will sway them into hating israel. it's just impossible, and that's very frustrating.
for me in particular, i find it very frustrating, as this single idea has turned so many people i know to support a genocidal entity. they believe in and support israel, so they stand with it now -- even if they condemn its current actions, they neglect how those actions are just an extension of its inherent existence -- whether they think israel's doing the right thing or wrong thing right now, they don't really care at the end of the day, because israel, to them, is necessary in keeping the jewish people alive. they stand with it, thinking that jews can only stand at all if they do.
but a genocidal crutch is no crutch at all: it only breaks us more. zionist jews make me so mad, and the worst part is that i could never express that to them in a way they'll understand.
#melonposting#anti-zionism#israel#i am so madddd and frustrated and stressed#with the whole camp thing going on my parents will inevitably find out (and soon!) that i'm anti-zionist#and given their age and proximity -- they're so deeply entrenched in zionism that i can't even hope to sway them#it's so sad and scary (i don't want them to be mad at me -- even though that really isn't the important thing here)#but it's also philosophically bizarre... like these people have good principles!#it's just this one tiny stupid thing (believing in israel) that's effectively turned them into bad people!#<- it's weird saying something like that. because i don't think they're bad people. but they're zionist.#part of it is that they're my parents and i love them but also... they're so good otherwise. a single thing went wrong.#(okay well not a single thing but it's generally minute things y'know?)#i don't wanna hate my parents. and i don't want them to hate me. can they please for the love of god stop#(takes every jew i know by the shoulders and shakes them back and forth) PLEAAAASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOPPPPPPP#anyway it's very hard for me to do work because i have this on my mind.#how do i break it to my parents that 1. i won't be working at camp this summer and 2. it's because i hate zionism?#i'm not cut out for situations like these ughhhhh why did i have to post that stupid anti-zionist instagram story in march#i could've just chosen not to take the job on my own accord and have enough time to come up with an excuse for my parents#whatever. too late for that. i dug my grave and now must lie in it#i guess it's character-building?? :')
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okay don giovanni review from last night. under the cut bc it's me. tldr the vocal performances were great, leporello carried the show, one of the most insane productions i've seen thus far but somehow in a new bizarre direction from normal. good snacks.
first of all i don't care how much wine you offer i think it's kind of ridiculous to charge $165 for a base ticket price for a performance that 1. isn't even in a concert hall or theater 2. is a concert performance rather than a staged performance (which was not advertised ahead of time) and 3. was not even a full production because they made the absolutely mind boggling decision to cut 100% of the recitative and replace it with Some Guy sitting on the stage narrating the plot between every 1-3 numbers
i did not pay that much gd bless. the student ticket was way cheaper.
the narration wasn't even good it was weirdly ungenerous to the women (like how do you even make elvira out be a "women, amirite" thing and also vaguely imply anna was into it in a production with zero acting? well they figured something out) and i don't think it even explained well enough what happens between each number to truly give a first time watcher a good idea of what's actually going on. not to mention that it absolutely kills any sense of momentum in the plot and makes the entire show drag like hell, because you have to wait between every single aria for either Some Guy to talk at you for three minutes straight, or wait awkwardly while people onstage walk off and people offstage walk on. it was so painfully clunky
they had a piano up there but since there was no recit it's not like she was accompanying much of anything. in practice what it ended up being used for was 1. the mandolin part for deh vieni (acceptable in the absence of a mandolin player; they were working with a limited chamber ensemble of musicians so i get it) 2. the party music at the end of act i (egregious fault imo because it absolutely kills the vibe of the scene and completely obfuscates the way the music is supposed to be adding to the tension and chaos with its different instrumental groups playing in different meters)
and 3. used to give singers their notes when the vocal line of their arias start on beat 1 measure 1, which they otherwise would have been able to get from the preceding recits (which is imo painfully amateurish for an ostensibly professional production)
all the numbers in act i were there although the narration was so bad i got jumpscared by fin ch'han dal vino because i forgot it was supposed to be there and thought we had skipped over that point in the plot. act ii had some really bizarre additional cuts made, notably they just entirely skipped over meta di voi and vedrai carino. it was like masetto and zerlina fuck off for the entirety of act ii save for, like, mille torbidi (they VERY briefly mentioned masetto getting beat up in the narration and i don't think they mentioned vedrai carino at all, they just skipped straight from deh vieni to sola sola. and also there was a painful awkward pause before deh vieni because i think the pianist forgot she was supposed to play there and the narrator jumped ahead to the next chunk of plot explanation too early). kept both dalla and tesoro (i'm fine with this ottavio was quite good though could've used a bit of ornamentation imo), kept mi tradi, kept non mi dir (more on that in a bit). no per queste which is probably a good thing not only for the show itself but also my head would have absolutely and irreversibly exploded if they had, probably
the whole thing kind of felt underrehearsed. like a quarter of the time it seemed like people didn't know what they were doing or had to be reminded where to be at that point in the show. and there were a few moments throughout where the orchestra struggled to keep up with the singers, but i really don't think they had much time to rehearse together, honestly.
and then, to my utter shock, the finale was actually really good?? like. insane compared to the rest of the show thus far. though it helps that 1. i absolutely love the harmonieband arrangements of cosa rara/i litiganti/non piu andrai, after possibly the draggiest non mi dir i've yet experienced it was like a breath of fresh air to hear that (and non mi dir was actually well performed i liked this anna but considering how much the Entire Show was dragging, the fact that they cut meta di voi and vedrai carino, AND the fact that they promised this act would be short, it felt crazy to me to keep it at that point.)
2. leporello and the don were by far the best performers of the night. so much so that i sought them out during the post show reception to tell them how great they were and enjoyed their performance. which i usually do not do, but in this like, high school recital ass production value. unbelievable relief that the final scene is dominated by the two actors in the show who most remembered that they can, and in fact Should, be acting. so much more movement and physicality and expression from those two compared to most everyone else. leporello especially, his actor apparently specializes in comedic bass roles and it shows, he was the standout all night
and 3. for the first time in the entire production they made an interesting decision regarding the physical space and staging! they had the commendatore sing from up on a balcony overlooking the audience in the foyer. the bar admittedly was set very low in the previous act and a half but the finale reminded me that i actually like this show again which is appreciated
though they then threw another curveball at me by Cutting the sextet at the end. which like didn't even piss me off at that point i was just baffled. like the don sinks down in agony and leporello sinks down whimpering in fear and the orchestra cuts off. and i'm expecting an awkward pause while they quietly get up and shuffle off so the rest of the cast can come back but nope. big orange title slate appears on the big screen behind them and the audience breaks into a roaring applause and the announcement of the wine and dessert reception. felt like i was in a fever dream
i will say the desserts were very nearly almost worth the bullshit that was the preceding show. they were so good. thank you austria for your dedication to pastry. and because i don't drink and couldn't appreciate the free wine offered i had to indulge in my own manner. spread contained chocolate oat bites (tasted as much like espresso powder as chocolate and coated in coconut, 4/10), almond sponge cake (classic, 7/10), cardamom apple bread pudding with caramel cream (not enough cardamom but otherwise very tasty and autumnal, 8.5/10) and honey cake (11/10. i don't know how they made this so good. i want more right now so much). i take both my mozart opera and my desserts very seriously.
anyway overall the production was. i would say frustrating. the singing quality was Really Good (leporello was the clear standout, probably followed by the don though i prefer my dons with a lighter voice but technically he was very good, then probably ottavio, then maybe masetto or anna. the commendatore was great but he's in it so little it's hard to compare)
i just wish they could have, like, actually done a full production. it would have been so great if they had gotten to tell the actual story and had been fully allowed to act. when there Was acting were the best moments of the show, and it's really unsurprising that most of that came from leporello, the absolute legend.
#no one respects a galant recit anymore. smh#sasha speaks#sasha reviews#don giovanni#opera tag#Really weird production. seemed designed to piss me off specifically in many aspects#frustrating in others because it DID have a lot of (mostly and regrettably squandered) promise that shone through in moments#but the singing was good. when there Was acting that was good. the desserts were good. the narration was dogshit i hate that so much#could not have fathomed producing a performance with a narrator replacing a recit#ZERO clue how they plan on applying that model to fanciulla later in the season.#if they do at all but it seems like a Thing for this company maybe? idk#don't know if i'll go see their carmen next spring. maybe it depends on my schedule#i think carmen might suffer a little less from the narration treatment comparatively since it can already be done with dialogue#as opposed to recit#idek how you'd do a puccini like that though. unless you just completely disregard narrative flow and comprehension#which honestly maybe they do. at least the flow part. including narration feels like they WANT comprehension (even if they do it poorly)#but don't seem to care about the flow considering how it butchered one of the best operas in the repertoire so far.#seriously if you just do what's written on the page for dg you have a slam dunk. and they deliberately chose not to. baffling#anyway carmen is at the french embassy next spring so maybe i just go to practice my french.#and see if they compete with austria for their refreshment spread.#and yes i realize now that part of the high ticket price is meant to cover the wine and desserts but i still think it's kind of ridiculous#okay done now bye.
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some people be saying the most batshit insane shit abt travis mcelroy
#dude. just saw 'it's so obvious the other 2 are annoyed and frustrated with him'#like. no? it's not? i dunno what kind of projecting you're doing but i can promise you that griffin and justin don't like#secretly hate their brother and are begging for release.#you can hate travis as much as you want (even though i disagree with that sentiment) i can understand being annoyed by his style or whatever#but i see it all the time of people saying that the other two should just do the show without him etc etc. and look.#maybe u haven't listened to so#the same episodes of mbmbam that i have. but i can hardly think of a single top moment that would be the same without all 3#if u want to see smth with just the other two just watch monster factory. don't make reddit posts about how it's 'so obvious' that#these people you DON'T KNOW. hate their brother. because they don't. sorry#siblings annoy eachother all the time. it's not an irredeemable crime. just listen to something else.#dunno if this is an unpopular opinion or what but i was a mcelroy fan back when taz was releasing and i just caught up to v dracula recently#and trying to look up discussion on the new season led me to a horrible vitriolic cesspit mostly directed at travis. which#(a simple miscommunication btwn travis and griffin that is quickly resolved in-canon without argument)#people: wow can't believe Travis would try and RUIN the game like that griffin clearly wanted to disown him immediately#like#there has to be some misconstruing lense they gotta be looking through. anyway. wtf
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okay, but like... I am not a fan of the love triangle situation, that is not a trope that I enjoy, but I honestly don't get all the criticism of Ava's performance as Jen. I think Jen's being played as shifty and manipulative and you can tell when she's lying, so she would probably annoy tf out of me irl, but her character is spending basically all her time lying and stealing and being a suspicious love interest in a show that wants you to be paranoid about the love interests, so that fits? I think it's incredibly hard to really accurately judge a performance when you still don't know if the character is a villain or not. Same with Christian and Johnny. I think I have certain opinions about their performances, but that could change significantly in the season finale.
#she's been caught lying multiple times this season#i feel like the performance lines up with the character#it's just that noa doesn't seem to see her very clearly (she's always surprised when she finds out jen is lying??) because she's into her#but tabby & imogen are doing the same thing with christian and johnny - it's just that christian and johnny have not been caught lying to#the same degree that jen has#so it's not quite as frustrating to the audience#though tbf i am like 'tabby pls question the masks thing PLS'#i feel like we don't even know enough about johnny for me to have a specific thing i want imogen to question#it's just... boy would i not be jumping feet first into trusting someone i've only known a couple of weeks when someone is literally trying#to kill me and my friends#anyway#pll#pretty little liars#pll summer school spoilers#pll spoilers#pretty little liars spoilers
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Since I'd been talking a lot about JP Vesperia (primarily Yuri and Flynn and the heavy changes that surround them, and because I'm highly passionate about them in their original context), I wanted to compile some more jarring if not outright glaring mistakes in the localization (or what were likely intentional changes, because I can't look at some of these and just call them "mistakes"). I'm not going to mention every little change throughout the game, so smaller things I'll mostly be leaving out (namely things that don't really affect characters or context). I primarily just wanted to give some insight on some of the bigger parts.
Some of the changes seem to have been mistakes in translation itself (not just localization, but misunderstanding what was being said in general; such as, there's an instance I mention of that between Patty and Don), so I've got some mentions hanging around for clarity purposes as some scenes didn't make much sense, likely because of this.
Vocal tone with Yuri was the most prominent issue that got me making this, and the context that was changed being right after if not equally next to that (most often also with Yuri but also Flynn).
This is something that has been bothering me for a while and I've been wanting to share this stuff with people interested in seeing the game with its original context. Generally speaking, the plot and story themselves are on point. The majority of the differences surround Yuri and Flynn respectively, so there's going to be a lot of mention of them throughout.
I've also posted video clips of my favorite scenes and the heavy changes, so consider those a supplement to this and vice versa.
Part 2.
Part 3.
Part 4.
(Other) GTF Favorites.
I'd like to preface this by mentioning the chief director and producer of the game itself has also spoken about localization inaccuracy issues, so that's something to keep in mind (it's in Japanese, but you should be able to use the offered post translator).
I'd also like to preface this by mentioning that in the original, Yuri is more playful and relaxed/casual (generally but including with Flynn, which the dub pretty much entirely changed until arc 3), but also gentler and softer. He has a very large variety of tonal behaviors/tonal "moods" that were pretty much nuked from the dub.
Basically, to get the full experience for Yuri, I can only really recommend playing the game in JP audio. Obviously you won't get the actual context because all you'll have is the dub context, but that's also partly why I'm making these posts - to cover the contextual changes while the video clips cover some of the tonal changes (because lbh I don't expect anyone to actually go watch the entire game in JP with subtitles unless you're as insanely dedicated as I am, and I'm largely doing it out of my love for the original Yuri and Flynn and my disdain for how the localization treated them).
As a heads up, there won't be many skits in here because I'm going through a specific YT playthrough for these screenshots. Specific skits won't always come up in the playthrough in question, and I can't find a whole list of skits in JP anywhere online. I don't have all skits unlocked in my own save either yet (you can unlock all skits with Grade which I have yet to do in the DE), so I can't use that to compare all skits right now.
There are plenty of small changes here and there that I won't be including in these posts because there are some sentence changes that aren't impactful but do exist. I just don't want to be here for a year covering the random changes that don't matter much. I'm also not going to include details of a lot of honorifics because I'd be here all day, but there is one one major instance that I mention later on.
For reference if anything wants to actually watch the game in JP with the subs (it goes until just after Hypionia), most of the references come from here. Since in some cases the subber just reused localized text even when the context wasn't the same, I did bring some of those up in these posts too. These were subbed before the DE version came out. I used screenshots with subs where possible to make it easier to follow along.
I have a lot of passion for JP Yuri and I hope I can pass on some of that passion to others. 🙏
Apologies in advance if some of these sound cranky. If I sound cranky about some specific changes, it's probably because I am.
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Since I talked about the whole, Raven being shady and Yuri therefore not being grateful to him incident that the localization for some reason butchered and made Yuri sound like a generally ungrateful or just outright dumb person who doesn't understand gratitude, I'll summarize that one again here:
Yuri has a skit with Estelle originally talking about how he can't find himself being grateful to someone like Raven for showing him how to sneak out of the castle. Basically, Raven is shady and he's not sure he should be grateful to someone like that, and is confused as to why Estelle would be so grateful when she doesn't even know him (because in his mind, he isn't sure he wants to trust a guy with those vibes). The dub just kinda... makes him sound like an ungrateful jerk and not so much because he's not sure he wants to trust Raven. It doesn't really sound like it's an issue of his with Raven specifically but more that he just generally doesn't feel grateful for the aid (and that in general one shouldn't feel grateful for aid like this), which gives off a really wrong impression of him that doesn't hold up throughout the game. Yuri wasn't wholly ungrateful for the gesture itself, but because of who it came from (and I imagine a weird peppy guy in jail is good cause to be skeptical).
We start off we a classic "Yuri, you idiot!" that was changed to "come on already!".
Yuri's response to Estelle mentioning he'd been in the knights doesn't actually give a time frame for how long he'd been there (the dub made up three months, but there was never originally even a time frame given).
Here when Yuri asks Estelle why she can't just leave, her response indicates she actually does know why. The dub made it more ambiguous, which could be easily misinterpreted as she really doesn't know, so I'm dropping this one here.
For some reason the localization seemed to have Estelle responding to Karol directly about the ace always performing their attack last ("I don't think so"). What she was referring to was the tiny monster that walked by, asking for confirmation that that monster was not the eggbear they were looking for (I wasn't gonna fight with the video to get a better screenshot without the annoying YT red bar in the way so the monster is in the corner mid-movement lol). Not sure if that was a genuine mistake, but it was an odd one.
(Also, side note and not putting an image here because it's more general, but Yuri refers to Karol as "Karol-sensei" which was translated in the localization to "Captain Karol". Basically, Yuri calls him "sensei" because that's a teacher/professor, and he's making a play on Karol's knowledge and being their "teacher" about monsters/maps/etc.)
I'd say this is more along the lines of overexaggerating and not overreacting, but this line was literally changed to "haha" in the dub. The whole point wasn't that Yuri just brushed her comment off or found it funny. At this point he still literally thinks she's exaggerating about her lack of knowledge out in the world, her excitement, etc.
Not the only instance you'll find of the dub just changing entire sentences to something meaningless as if they ??? didn't know what it meant (they actually changed Patty saying an entire sentence to "aye"). In some cases they added entire sentences that weren't even there...
Even though I can kind of see where they went with the dub here, the point was supposed to be that Flynn actively thought he would be happy for Yuri to go outside the barrier and see the world.
The dub changed this to Flynn saying that he, in the now, is happy that Yuri is outside the barrier, but then says he got a little less happy when he saw the wanted poster, indicating he was previously happy but got less happy, yet says in that moment that he is happy.
It's a weird case of (past/present) tense usage for the most part, but they also removed the fact that Flynn is literally saying "I thought I would be happy" (thus expressing he'd been wanting Yuri to see the world outside the barrier and would've been happy to find out he did). The reason he's not finding himself happy is because of the wanted poster and the crimes listed on it, following up that his honest happiness for Yuri (ultimately because of the poster) was a lie.
This also means they removed Flynn expressing the honesty of his happiness for a positive concept for Yuri, which, given all the changes toward Flynn in the dub, already now takes away from the fact that he'd been actively hoping for good things for someone and we're left with this more sarcastic take on him being "happy".
Obviously his happiness wasn't really a lie because most of the crimes were falsified (primarily the ones that would make him actually mad, because Flynn has had to have been aware this whole time that Yuri has committed small time crimes for the past few years now), but at the time, the focus on this conversation is that Flynn thought he'd be happy at a time that Yuri left the barrier; meaning he'd been hoping for it prior to it happening.
I'm also mentioning it because it's the very first in a whole line of changes the dub made to their relationship (and it's their first in game interaction ffs) and to Flynn himself as he's perceived as a character. The original is much more expressive of how important they are to each other in a lot of various ways.
Inserting the JP audio version of the following scene with Flynn here.
And... the following one from there.
This was changed to "damn, we if lose our balance...". I know they did it because Yuri had just fallen over, but I'm including this one because the context isn't... really the same thing?
This dub change is a bit odd to me. They had him saying something along the lines of "she is a princess after all" in the dub, regarding the council backing her.
The original context is more like, the council is backing her and he's hearing it directly from Ioder and he probably doubts Ioder would lie like that or about that, cementing that yes, she truly is, like he suspected, a princess, but it's almost still a bit odd to know. It's sort of like, he knew/had suspicions but hearing it directly from Ioder just confirms it for certain.
The dub just made it sound like well yeah, it's obvious they'd want to back her, she's a princess... but Ioder is a prince, so that doesn't explain why they're not backing him. She is a princess after all, so of course they'd back her... but what's stopping them from backing the prince?
Another weird one for me. In the dub Yuri says that "even the Commandant was a little in over his head", when he actually... really wasn't? All he did was step in. Things got bad enough that he had to, but he wasn't in over his head. Not sure how or why the dub ended up with that.
An example of the dub having a habit of just adding in random lines that didn't actually exist (and in this case the one added didn't even contextually make sense. This was no thank you from him, this was literally him making Yuri do something for him because he was going to ask Flynn for a favor and ended up with Yuri in the cell instead).
Another super weird one in the dub. They had Yuri saying Flynn was "too" late, implying he hadn't made it in time, but he did. He made it just before the battle started, but the original context only says he's late, not too late (which makes sense given that they were ready to fight but hadn't started yet).
This was changed to Yuri just mentioning there was one way they could get out of there without actually saying what it was, and Judith saying if he thinks it might work what's the harm in trying it out. Not sure why they changed Yuri literally telling her his plan, so... again, a super weird change that I don't get why they didn't just keep the context the way it was.
Third image was changed to "someone get me away from this psycho", which... I also don't get why they put that there unless they just wanted so much flavor text that they wanted to change the whole "they're in a fight and he's telling her not to come over here because he's pissed at her because they're fighting" part of the fake fight they had going on.
Not one I have a huge problem with, but definitely good examples of them going out of their way to change just... perfectly normal stuff that literally has no reason to be changed? Some of it is flavor text and some of it feels over the top for me. Stuff that makes me like... why would you change that when there was no reason to? Could be more of a personal pet peeve of mine, but I just don't like unnecessary changes when there was nothing wrong or odd about the original text and doesn't at all come off odd in English. Unfortunately Vesperia got littered with those.
I didn't feel like getting a whole video for this, but basically Judith gives a little laugh instead of just the more upset/distressed(?) sound she made in the dub. Feels more fitting imo to keep up the "lie" Yuri started for her. The dub makes it seem more like she feels guilty, versus here she's giving a little forced giggle to go along with it. Again, a change I'm not sure why they put in.
Ngl I get completely different vibes from these. The JP comes across more as concern, rather than... treating them like they're some mob on the loose...?
Once again, this gives off negative vibes toward Flynn as a character imo.
Here Judith gives more of a reason for coming with them, which they changed in the dub to "with the circumstances being what they are, this is just how things turned out". Reasonably, she didn't have to stick around after they ran from Dahngrest, but here she gives a quick "reason".
The dub changed this to "I'll bet he is". They were just told he's the current magistrate in Heliord, and all Yuri says here expresses he's letting it sink in and realizing exactly why all this is happening here. It's not a huge story beat or anything that gets changed, but it's an example of changing things that don't need to be changed as if trying to play things up in a way that... doesn't feel necessary to me? In this case the situation is kind of dawning on Yuri as he realizes how bad this situation could be/why it's like it is, but in the dub it comes across as more just unimpressed and "of course he'd do that".
An unfortunate, classic moment of them changing how much Yuri believes in and trusts Flynn. They changed this to "gotta run, Flynn!" and he just... leaves. I'm sorry but in what universe does "leave the rest to you" equal "gotta run"???
This one is one of those cases where the localization text was super awkward and wonky, and worse, they actually voiced it that way (like "we have guild's job to deal with". Yes, they actually voiced it that way too on top of everything else grammatically wonky with the entire conversation that they didn't bother fixing when the DE came out).
Also here, they changed what Yuri says about Cumore and Flynn. "I don't know how I could explain this to Flynn" doesn't, at least to me, carry the same weight as Yuri actually feeling ashamed (in the dub he says "what a shame", but does not express shame, versus him saying "how pathetic" and expressing shame in feeling pathetic) and saying he can't even face Flynn because Cumore got away. The thing is, Yuri does tend to posture, so when he fails at something, it hits him pretty hard.
And let's be honest, this just hits way harder than "he will get what he deserves".
Interestingly, Yuri could also fall into the category of viewing himself as sinful later on, which I talk about in my favorites post and the usage of "crime" and "sin" within the JP context.
Not particularly important, but just another (more mild) case and example of how the dub just randomly changed tone/mood/wording for no reason.
Another case of Yuri being more aggressive in the dub than he actually was. Here, all he says is just a plain statement. In the dub, he has an attitude about it and says it in a tone that's more insulting that Ioder didn't know about Heracles.
This isn't the only case of dub Yuri acting aggressively toward Ioder when he wasn't supposed to be and we'll get to that, but Ioder is another similar case of the dub making Yuri unnecessarily vocally rude (despite that Ioder is very polite toward Yuri).
(I left out the subtitles because all they did was copy the dub's localization, which kinda defeats the point of this post LOL. This will be the case going forward for any same circumstances.)
This one's a more interesting tidbit to me and less of a harmful change (i.e. I find that a lot of if not most changes relative to Flynn do more harm than good when compared with the original context). Basically it's saying "sweet mask and sharp eyes", implying Flynn's sweet face is a mask and saying it contrasts with his sharp eyes. I could get into a whole rant about why I love that in relation to some side material, but even in the game itself, there's the knight Flynn with his sweet, polite side and his real side that only shows when he's around Yuri (basically, who Flynn has to be for his job and who he actually is as a person, which he only gets to be around someone who knows the real him).
I'd guess this got changed in the dub because they weren't sure how to word it, though there's no mention of "heartthrob" here at all and instead actually says "sweet mask" as if, again, to say his sweetness is just a mask. It's actually a very interestingly accurate representation of his character - how he tends to not be himself when he's being "knight Flynn", and how that sweet face is contrasted by the look in his eyes (which they say, you know, eyes are the windows to the soul, so this would imply the sweet face is the mask and the eyes are the real Flynn. And of course, this Flynn is implied to show himself in his sparring with Yuri in Aurnion, where sword fighting is the best way to express himself. This isn't to say Flynn being a nice person in and of itself is a lie, but that his overly polite, respectful, kind knight side is a sweet mask contrasted to the man who loves to fight and has a sharp look in his eyes)
For now, we'll be back at Mantaic in the next post (due to image per post limit).
#Tales of Vesperia#GTF JP Vesperia Things#GTF Vesperia Localization Woes#really like... a lot of the time? the other characters weren't changed all that much#it's primarily Yuri who got this weird shift where they just... flattened his personality?#but some of the biggest offenders ended up being some of the most important scenes in the game which is what bothers me#and sometimes the localization is pretty much just... on point with the plot dialogue and other characters#yet for some reason they just... changed a lot of tone for Yuri?#it's just like... Yuri will have personality in his tone and they instead make dub Yuri speak it in a flat way in those moments#this did happen with the original dubbing quite a bit but it's also just SUPER noticeable with the new lines#my suggestion would be to at least play the game w/ JP dialogue and see how you feel coming out of it if you're a fan of Yuri and/or Flynn#and if you like it enough then I'd suggest watching the playthrough in JP that these screenshots came from if you're RLY dedicated lol#it's not JUST Yuri it's just /dominantly/ Yuri. other odd lines just didn't... go as hard?#like Raven and Karol especially go pretty hard on their lines in JP and the Schwann stuff with Karol was OOF#or if you'd rather just skip to watching it in JP I mean be my guest lol I just know some ppl might rather PLAY it#I just feel like... like... even tho not everything in the dub is horrendous... if you're a YURI fan?#it's hard to go back to the dub (impossible for me ngl) when you have this actual silly little guy#who is a lot more emotional and wholesome and Yuri isn't acting like he has a stick up his dubbed ass in some scenes#I still prefer the 360 version plot-wise for the most part and it's a mixed bag there a bit but#I can't get JP audio on the 360 so. it's the struggle ig.#in my case though it's this feeling of like... them wanting to create an image onto Yuri that wasn't supposed to be there?#obviously I don't know what went on in the loc room but I do know I walked out looking at dub Yuri like#him and the original Yuri aren't even the same. I get so frustrated with dub Yuri's unnecessary ATTITUDE sometimes#which wasn't ever a problem for me period in JP. he's emotional and sincere WAY more often#also lbh I cannot reasonably picture dub Yuri all dressed up and pretty the way he is in official artwork LOL#and that's the thing. I see them so differently it's like they're different people#I also just feel like the dub was like. he doesn't fit OUR vision for him. what WE want him to be like#and again I don't know what went on in that loc room but I DO know that's how I came out feeling from this game#anyway this is in hope more ppl will come to love JP Yuri's personality and stuff#but yeah more next time on ''why did you do this to my sweet baby boy''
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me: why does my brain feel unglued
My underwear when I take my bathroom break: 🟥🟥🟥
#cipher talk#Anyway. Has anyone ever had a sore scratchy throat as a pre menstrual symptom#Because that might explain something#Something I am thinking about now again because of my unwilling absence from T is that oh yeah I actually don't hate menstruation#As much as I'm expected to#The symptoms can be frustrating but it doesn't actually make me dysphoric- I just said that to my Dr to get him to give me my boy juice#I remember blocking a major cis Jewish blogger on here once because I found her additions to a post I made talking about gender and mikvehs#Very annoying#I am not really bothered by being a man- or at least a not-woman- who menstruates even though I frankly really wish I had a dick#And on some level I like to commemorate it when it happens. Because it's important to me.#That there are men who do not fit the 'correct' shape of a man. That I don't want to simply pass and politely regard my birth as a mistake#It's also why I find medieval discussions of cis men being referred to as menstruating interesting#It's a very weird space to be in because I do have bottom dysphoria; it's just completely independent of wether or not I bleed
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a truly terrible idea has latched hold of my gremlin brain which is, buck and tommy do break up so that buck can pursue eddie because either tommy thinks buck is in love with eddie or buck feels like he should be with eddie because everyone else keeps suggesting there's something more there BUT buck/eddie getting together changes their dynamic so much that neither of them are enjoying themselves (and they're worrying about losing what made their friendship so special because of all the changes to the dynamic) AND buck and tommy keep hooking up [air quotes] platonically (with tommy stumbling into inconvenient feelings and pining pathetically for buck while fucking him) while buck struggles to sort out intense feelings toward eddie (which obviously have to be romantic of course) vs. his calm, more settled feelings toward tommy (they're not as intense as his feelings about eddie so they can't possibly be romantic) blah blah long story slightly less long but buck realizes he's been in love with tommy the whole time and was having trouble separating strong but platonic feelings for eddie from his romantic feelings toward tommy and then tommy's like "newsflash asshole i've been in love with you the whole goddamn time"
i'll never write it because it's irredeemably stupid and i value my peace but it IS sitting in my hindbrain tormenting me right now
#thank you for coming to my ted talk#i'm not tagging this bc i don't want it showing up in any show or ship tags but...............................#terrible evil plotbunny free to a good home#nobody ever writes about the friends who get together bc 'why not everyone else already thinks we're dating' and then it doesn't work out#because the dynamic changes SO MUCH that you're not sure if it was such a good idea in the first place#now add a third person to the mix that you like but aren't sure how you feel about them#not sure if eddie would be aware it's casual and non exclusive or if there'd be miscommunication leading to angst#honestly this is just me venting my frustrations with those breakup fics masqueraring as b*cktommy that have tommy#graciously sacrificing himself on the altar of b*ddie's true love and stepping aside magnanimously#that's not interesting to me to read even as a b*ddie shipper#if buck and tommy have to break up let it be real and messy because real people are real and messy#let tommy fight for buck even if it doesn't end up working out#let buck and eddie feel guilty because buck did genuinely care about tommy and eddie does like him as a friend#let tommy cut both of them off because even though he likes both of them he still has feelings and it hurts seeing them together#let tommy be petty about showing off a new love interest or fwb and how much happier he is with this guy than he was with buck#let buck wonder if he made the right choice or not bc he didn't ever want to hurt tommy#he only convinced himself tommy would be completely fine with the breakup because he needed him to be fine so that he could do it guilt fre#let eddie wonder if they made the right choice or not bc while he finally has what he's wanted for years it did hurt someone he really like#maybe it'll all work out in the end for buck and eddie AND tommy but i just want it to feel real and not overly polished and sanitized#and no one is hurt or upset or petty or flawed#anyway#i like mess#don't @ me#i might have to write this now but i don't want to be chased off with pitchforks and torches#text#shut up giallos
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so many of you talk about the cruel adults in your childhood that negatively effected you and caused lifelong insecurity yet you're still perfectly fine with being that mean stranger to any kid that has the misfortune of existing around you and thats just really gross !!!
#like i get kids can be overwhelming for a various amount of reasons but its not going to kill you to treat children with basic human decency#adults can be just as overwhelming or annoying—if not more. yet if you talked to an another adult the same way you do to a kid#then ppl would fucking hate you and not want to be around you because youre not being cool and witty—youre just mean!!!#everyone has experienced the frustration of being a kid being mistreated by an adult. some more than others#rather its ignoring your bodily autonomy (from sa and assault to hugging you when you don't want to be touched to not letting you#make your own harmless choices like a haircut or whatever). everyone has been talked down to or had their opinion treated like its nothing#or that their thoughts or input doesn't matter. everyone has a childhood experience with a mean or judgemental adult#yet over and over ppl are fine just repeating that cycle of abuse and hatred#like youre a young adult and youre still getting treated like shit by older ones. but youre able to have a drink or you graduated or smthn#so now you feel like you earned that right to be judgemental & angry & mean to a group of people that didnt fucking do anything to you#anyways. this is because im sick and had to go to the store to get groceries and meds#so its a 20 minute walk to the nearest store in 108 degrees bc i dont have gas money and then in the store im ofc using a face mask#like im sweaty and feel disgusting and like shit but this kid was SO fucking excited about his spiderman toy and wanted to talk and#his mom said ‘i told you no one wants to hear about that crap leave her alone’ and like?? no fuck off let a kid be happy?? hes not fucking#doing anything wrong?? so we talked and he showed me the little tiy that lights up and asked if i saw the new spiderverse movie#and i told him i havent! so he asked why so i explained i have photosensitivity and what that means and why i cant see it#(‘even though i heard its super cool!’) and HE WAS SO SWEET... like immediately hid the toy because oh! flashing lights can hurt me!#and then immediately said dont worry because he'll tell me about it so its like i saw it instead!#and like. guys imma be honest with you. i stilm got no fucking idea what this movie's plot is.#but you bet your fucking ass i was pretending like i was following along & was going ‘no way!’ ‘so it's a parallel universe...?’ ‘oh wow!’#like yea its unnecessary. i felt oike i was gonna collapse and im still struggling to breathe at home now. but also i been the kid#who just wanted to talk about my interests and no one wanted to or was dismissing it.#i know it's not a end of the world deal but i also know that crushing feeling. you gotta be the kindness you want to see in the world yknow#anyways. be nice to kids or im not going to be nice to you. they're one of the most vulnerable members of our society and deserves kindness
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the problem with me and nolan is that i ALMOST love a lot of his movies (that ive seen) except in almost every one there's 1 glaring aspect that i hate (it's usually misogyny) that makes it hard to like the rest of the movie
#i mean. oppenheimer is an outlier bc there's several aspects i dont like abt that one#interstellar? misogyny. inception? only one i don't have major issues with#misogyny still there but at least theres less than fuckin. interstellar#dont get me wrong i like interstellar otherwise but like.#both it and oppenheimer have a problem of the film TELLING us that the women in it are super smart and influential! but in the film itself#they never get to show that like. when does murphy do anything really. when does anne hathaway's character do anything except#hinder the mission because of ~emotions~ why is the main guy always right even though hes not always the most qualified person in the room#why does kitty oppenheimer say ive been upgraded to housewife! sarcastically only to be cast right back into that role by the film#no matter how good emily blunt may be she can't save that she has 1 good scene and it's not that long#dont even get me started on jean tatlock in that film ill start biting.#i KNOW that parts of oppenheimer are supposed to be subjective but do we ever see those women in the ~objective~ section? no#and if that's your only portrayal of these women with only vague indicators that there might be something else going on i'm not letting it#go. excuse for writing them badly#ANYWAY#neon has thoughts#movie tag#i think nolan and i just don't get along. i think i need to accept this and move on with my life but unfortunately it's really frustrating.#all his stuff is ALMOST good. and then
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Cried over an English test but hey I'm alive
#very pissed at the teacher#i wasn't there the day of the test but i was there when they were handed back#so i got to take a look at the format and it was pretty simple#describe each literary device listed and give an example#so i thought i would be doing that. i could do that#but i show up today and the test he gives me is completely different#it says to identify the literary device in each sentence. the thing is#EVERY SINGLE ONE HAS MULTIPLE OF THE OPTIONS#so i asked the teacher and he said “yeah but they all have one that's the most correct just trust your instincts”#AND IM JUST SITTING THERE LIKE HELLO?????? “MOST CORRECT”????????#NONE OF THEM ARE MORE CORRECT THAN THE OTHERS#and i told him this!!!! and he said “just pick the most obvious one and don't second guess yourself”#OKAY WELL HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THAT WHAT IS IMMEDIATELY MOST OBVIOUS TO YOU IS NOT NECESSARILY THE SAME FOR ME#AND THAT DOESN'T MAKE ME WRONG???????????#FUCKING HELL#LEARN TO. IDEK. LEARN SOME COMMON SENSE DUDE#my reaction must have been pretty extreme bc the girl next to me was like “hey you'll do fine” and asked how i was doing a few times#appreciate you girlie you're a real one#so yeah i cried two or three times BUT did not let the tears leave my eyes#one point with just out of frustration bc the teacher said something wrong. and then later he corrected himself#and even though it was easier after that i still cried bc i was losing my mind#anyway i normally like this teacher but this was fucking stupid#everyone stop whatever you're doing and only pay attention to me#ann rants
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i hate it when people get mad at me for asking 'how can I help' like ah yes hold on let me just read your mind and magically fix the problem sorry to inconvenience you by trying to actually communicate
#disclaimer#this post was inspired by chores and is more about things like random everyday tasks than issues tm#bc believe me I do know it's frustrating when you don't know how someone can help/how to communicate it and you just want them to fix it#but even in that case it's not the fault of the person asking any more than it is yours#so even though it's hard communication is absolutely vital#anyway#vent#rant#random#thoughts#random thoughts#shower thoughts
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