#Ephraim's both saying he's never going to let her die but also

[randomnameless]

Re-about Eirika and stuff

Remember when Seth asks her to run away and flee when Jehanna is besieged? Of course Eirika refuses, she is a FE Lord. The situation is dire, she will stay, thinks of her brother but says this :

“No. I will not retreat. If I give up now… My brother would not forgive me. I’m the princess of Renais. I will fight, either to victory or to death. Brother, I…”

Imo, Eirika would likely apologise to Ephraim for “dying” here since they made a promise to reunite and see each other alive again, and Seth said they’re basically going to die, but she’s going to fight “either to victory or to death”.

Of course on the Ephraim route Eirika’s bravery is a bit more subdued since we don’t see her that much, and she keeps on remembering how Seth and Ephraim used to protect her a lot back then, and yet Ephraim has this line about her when he hears Jehanna’s castle fell :

We’ll make it. Rest easy on that. Eirika is my sister. That one will never lay down her blade. And I am Eirika’s brother. There is no way I’ll let my sister die!

bar the usual “I’m not letting my sister die”, Ephraim knows she’s never going to lay down her blade, she’s going to fight.

Ephraim is also sure she will fight “long enough” - against the main crux of the Grado Army, aka severely outnumbered !! - for him to make the trip from Grado to Jehanna.

Honestly coming from this, the brother who knows his sister can fight and relies on her, to Mist being a potted plant in FE Tellius felt like a downgrade.

The plot still has Eirika being rescued by her brother twice during the events of the game because it’s a FE plot, but watsonian wise, Eirika is as much of a fighter as Ephraim is, and the one who sings her praises is Ephraim himself.

[four-loose-screws]

FE8 Novelization Translation - Chapter 16, Section 2

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I call this a “section” because it is not a separate part of the chapter in the book, but divided from the rest of the chapter by a scene break.

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Chapter 16: Repatriation

The army climbed a mountain, then traveled down a gently sloping mountain road, and finally, they could see Renais Palace just before them.

For Eirika, this was her first time seeing her home in a long time. Though it was currently occupied by the enemy, she still felt nostalgic at the sight.

“What a gorgeous palace!”

L’Arachel said.

Eirika was as happy as if it was she herself who had been praised, and nodded. “Yes. It is a very old building full of rich history. I didn’t realize it while I was living here in peace, but… seeing it like this after so long makes me realize just how beautiful it is.”

“It's so upsetting that such a beautiful palace has to become a battlefield."

Hearing that surprised Eirika.

She hadn’t thought much about that until now. Taking back the castle would mean exactly what L’Arachel had just said. This beautiful building would be filled with angry screams and the clashing of blades. The blood of countless soldiers would flow down the white hallways. The pillars and walls would likely be left with severe damage. Even to Eirika, who’d survived battle after battle to get this far, the thought that the palace of all her memories since childhood might go up in flames made her so sad that she could hardly bear it.

Ephraim noticed that she looked sad, and said to encourage her, “Whatever happens to the palace can be fixed. It won’t be that big of a deal.”

“Brother…”

“Buildings can be repaired however many times they need to be.”

Though those words seemed unconcerned about what may happen to the castle, Eirika couldn’t help but think about what they meant.

Buildings could be rebuilt. But what about human beings?

Both Orson, who’d betrayed his homeland… and Lyon, who’d been changed completely by the Dark Stone… both of them could never become the people they once were ever again. Even if they vowed to do so, the memories of their betrayals and the invasion had stained their hands red with blood, and would forever cast a shadow over their hearts. They already had scars that could never disappear completely.

“If we want to avoid a fight, then we could wait here patiently for a while.” Innes said. “Orson’s poor government should not last for long. A rebellion will eventually break out, and someone close to him will run out of patience with him and assassinate him. However, that means that many people would die as we wait."

“We cannot possibly wait that long.” Ephraim said and looked at Eirika.

The right to command the entire army was still Eirika’s, as it always had been until now. Personally, Eirika wanted to hand it over to her brother, but Ephraim stood behind her. The soldiers had followed her ever since they left Frelia. Eirika was the person they trusted and respected. When he considered how they felt, he imagined that they would fight better if she continued to be their leader. That was what Ephraim thought.

“Yes. We cannot stand by and do nothing. Let’s go!” Eirika raised her sword. 

The soldiers all cheered as loudly as they could.

The neighing of cavalry horses shook Renais for the first time in forever, signaling the start of the battle to reclaim Renais Palace.

Most of the soldiers currently guarding Renais Palace were those brought in from Grado. The news of the emperor's passing and Lyon's fleeing the country had of course reached them as well. Though they had been in battle stations and receiving consistent orders, it was only natural that their morale would be low considering the circumstances.

And because they knew that fierce ex-Grado soldiers like Duessel and Cormag were now members of the Renais Army, their morale was all the worse. Just the sight of Duessel's face made more than a few of them start shaking, drop their swords, and surrender.

The door to the treasure room had been destroyed, and almost all of the treasure was gone. Orson was supposed to be leading the army, but did nothing, so the army had lost any sense of order, and roamed the palace lawlessly.

They conquered the palace in no time at all. Eirika and Ephraim rushed to the throne room.

The moment they pushed open the door, warm memories filled Eirika's chest. Memories from before the day the palace fell, and she fled with Seth. It already seemed like a long time ago, but her father's smiling face when he said goodbye was still clearly burned into her mind.

In that moment, Eirika had made a vow within her heart. That she would reunite with her father and brother, and retake Renais...

Reuniting with her father had become a dream that would never come true for all of eternity, but she had safely found her brother. And now, Renais' recapture was one step away… just one small step away.

The only person waiting for them inside of the room was Orson. He was sitting on the throne, but when he saw Eirika and Ephraim, he calmly stood up.

"Orson…" Ephraim readied his lance. 

However, Eirika did not unsheath her weapon, instead pleading with him, "Orson, please talk to us. Why did you betray Renais?"

He did not answer. He only slowly raised his sword.

His eyes were hollow, but his stance did not show even a single opening. It was a vestige of his time as the leader of the knights that still remained within him.

"Please, Orson. Put down your weapon, and talk to us. Who convinced you to betray Renais?"

"It's no use, Eirika. He is not in his right mind.” Ephraim quickly whispered to her.

Eirika knew that her brother was right. But she couldn't give up. He'd lost his wife, grieving her so deeply that he could not perform his job duties, and then someone tried to manipulate that weakness… There was nothing more pitiful than having to defeat him as an enemy.

"Orson, please talk to us. Who was it? Who tried to take advantage of your sadness…?"

Orson suddenly lunged at her. He swung his sword in one terrifyingly sharp motion. If Ephraim had not raised his lance a split second faster than Orson lowered his weapon, Eirika likely would have been seriously injured.

She felt she had no choice but to unsheath her sword. 

However, Ephraim, repelling one of Orson's fierce attacks with his lance, shouted to her, "Stand down, Eirika!"

"Ah… Brother…"

"I'm the person he betrayed. This is my regret. Leave him to me!"

'Regret…?' Such language was not like Ephraim at all. He must have chosen his words carefully, knowing that she pitied Orson.

"I will not allow you to stand in my way… I will not allow anyone to destroy my happiness." Orson muttered quietly, and brought down his sword. 

Ephraim blocked it with his lance and counterattacked with a sharp battle cry.

Eirika gripped her sword, but did not move. Her chest was tight, and tears were in her eyes. Orson's voice was full of sadness.

'I cannot forgive him.' That one thought was clear in her mind. Whoever manipulated Orson's sadness and tempted him to betray his country, she could never forgive him.

Orson's attacks were desperate, but Ephraim was physically stronger than him. He shifted his stance from left to right, and toyed with Orson.

Finally, the battle was decided. Ephraim's lance stabbed deep into Orson's side.

Orson staggered and dropped his sword. The hand he placed against his wound was stained red with blood.

"Monica…" His final words were his wife's name before he collapsed.

Ephraim wiped the sweat from his brow and turned around towards Eirika. "Are you alright, Eirika?"

"Yes. And you, Brother?"

"We've finally retaken the palace."

"Yes. Father is surely very happy."

"...If he is, then that's all I need to know." He said in a melancholy voice that was entirely unlike him.

Eirika looked at her brother's face. He was staring down at Orson. From his expression, she could tell it was unbearably painful for him.

"We're too late. We couldn't do anything. Renais is in ruins, and the people are suffering. Makes me wonder why I couldn't come home sooner…"

"Brother, don't say that…" 

"I'm sorry, Eirika. I didn't mean to complain. I'm just mad at my own incompetence."

Eirika shook her head. Ephraim was like a miracle, having defeated the enemy army and retaken Renais. Nobody should beat themself up and say they were too late after that. He was just being hard on himself.

Seth soon appeared to give his report. Only a few of their soldiers sustained any injuries, and they had successfully captured the entire castle.

"Also…" Seth started to say something else, but hesitated. It was entirely unlike him.

"What is it?"

"...Please come this way. To the room Orson locked himself in." Seth showed them the way, and they followed behind him.

Halfway there, Seth hesitantly turned towards Eirika. "Lady Eirika, it may be best for you to stay here. What you will see could be too much for you…"

"What is it? Seth, what did you find?" she asked.

But he did not answer. 

Eirika had a slight suspicion that she knew what was making him hesitate. Whatever was inside the room where Orson was locked up, thinking about his deceased wife… it must be keepsakes that it would make her heart hurt. "I'll be fine, Seth. Whatever I see, I will not falter."

"But…"

"We're going to Orson's room, right? Whatever he was doing in his room… I must see it."

Seth nodded and continued on towards the room.

The moment they opened the doors, they heard a delicate voice.

"Darling…"

Eirika twitched.

It sounded like a woman's voice, but was utterly monotonous. It more closely resembled a bird speaking human language...  repeating the words, but not understanding the meaning.

'It can't be.' A premonition almost impossible to believe sent a chill down her spine. The scent of a strong incense wafted from inside the room. It seemed to be trying to hide a foul stench.

Ephraim muttered, "That voice… could it be…. Orson's….?"

"Darling."

The voice was coming from within the dimly lit room. A thin sheet of silk hung from the ceiling, covering what appeared to be the bed.

The voice stopped, and silence fell all around them. Eirika looked away in fear.

There was hardly any furniture to be seen. The room was almost empty… The owner of the voice had to be behind the silk sheet, but she did not have the courage to check.

She heard the voice again.

"Darling. Darling. Darling. Darlingdarlingdarlingdarlingdarlingdarlingdarling."

The voice repeated the same word over and over as if its source was broken.

Eirika felt like she might faint. Seth supported her.

She was confident when she said she would not falter, but those words were just a lie now. If she had not clenched her teeth as hard as she could, she likely would have screamed.

Ephraim quickly pulled out his lance. It was reckless to swing it around in a small room like this one, but he'd lost his common sense, too.

"Is this the same magic that Lyon used? Did someone resurrect Orson's wife… just like Lyon resurrected Emperor Vigarde's corpse?"

Eirika finally realized the meaning behind the ecstatic look on Orson's face.

This allowed his deceased wife to be brought back to him. Every time her corpse uttered "Darling," it comforted him, though the sound had no meaning… When he gently touched her cold, hard skin… it descended him further into madness.

"Seth, take Eirika and get out of here!" Ephraim ordered.

"I'll take care of this. You go outside too, Lord Ephraim…"

"No, I'll do it. Hurry up and take Eirika."

"...Understood." Seth picked up Eirika and left the room.

Even though she was now free from the incense and fresh air filled her lungs, her pounding heart could not relax. She wasn't even aware of the fact that she was clinging to Seth's arm.

She couldn't stop shaking. The monotonous voice echoed through her ears over and over again. "Seth… what… what was that…?"

"I'm sorry. I knew I shouldn't have brought you into that room."

"No, I went in because I insisted…" 

After a few deep breaths, she finally let go of Seth's arm. The feelings rushing through her still had not calmed down, but she managed to regain her composure enough to speak normally. "Orson loved his wife, didn't he? Then why didn't he know that something so… inhuman was nothing more than a desecration of her?"

"If only he'd had time for his heart to return to peace, he certainly would have known. He likely would have slowly accepted her death, and been able to move on. However, while he had still not yet healed from his grief, there was someone who whispered in his ear. That he would resurrect his wife if he betrayed Renais."

"...You're right."

"If I was put in the same situation, I might make the same choice. If someone tempted me with that offer when I lost the person I love, chances are I would find it difficult to turn down."

"Seth…" Eirika felt that was a bit surprising to hear. Because Seth was so calm and composed, there was no way he could go insane like Orson did. He wouldn't really learn what it was like to sympathize with Orson… Someway or another, she knew that he wouldn't.

Seth calmly changed the subject. "Something seems to be going on outside. Let's go check it out." He left her side and walked towards the balcony.

Ephraim came out from the room. He looked even more exhausted than he had right after his fight with Orson.

When Eirika approached him, he showed her a stiff smile. "It's all over now. It… It disappeared and turned to ash, just like Emperor Vigarde did…"

"Brother…"

"What about Seth? Where did he go?"

"We heard a loud noise coming from outside, so he went to check it out…"

Eirika pointed towards the balcony. They could hear the loud voices even from where they were standing. It sounded like a large crowd of people had gathered, and were shouting.

"Is it the townspeople? Why are they here? Are they unhappy about something…?"

Just then, Seth returned. He walked up to Ephraim and told the twins, "Lord Ephraim, Lady Eirika, please go out to the balcony."

"What's going on? What is the commotion about?"

"Please go and see for yourselves."

Eirika and Ephraim looked at each other, then decided to do as Seth said for now and go out to the balcony.

The garden in front of the palace was filled with a crowd of people. It was such a large group that they thought it might be made up of all the people living in the capital. And the moment they appeared on the balcony, the voices only got louder.

The people were waving their hands in the air and shouting excitedly, "Lord Ephraim! Lady Eirika!"

"Long live the king! Our king has returned!"

Eirika looked down at the crowd that had gathered in utter amazement. Ephraim continued walking and placed his hands on the balcony railing. Those in the crowd who saw this became louder still.

Ephraim turned around to Seth, who was standing behind him, with a bewildered look on his face. "What is this?"

"Your ears do not deceive you. They gathered here upon learning of your return home. Please wave at them, and acknowledge their joy."

"O… Okay." Ephraim's gestures were stiff and awkward.

Eirika stood by his side with a smile on her face.

Neither of them were very good at standing in the spotlight. He was utterly confused, and quickly retreated back inside the palace.

He was so nervous that he loosened his collar and took a deep breath.

"I'm surprised. I didn't think there was any way I'd receive such a greeting. When the people of Renais were suffering, all I did was fight with other nations, and couldn't do anything for my own country. I was prepared for it to most likely take a long time before they would forgive me…"

"Their enthusiasm comes from their reactions to Orson's terrible rule. They are not necessarily praising you." Seth's words were harsh. 

Ephraim's expression stiffened. "You… You're right, Seth. The people are seeking a new leader. And that just so happened to be me. I will not disappoint them or their excitement. I will dedicate myself to Renais' restoration and the return of peace to the people.”

"And I will help."

When Eirika said that, Ephraim's eyes lit up with joy. "Your saying so reassures me more than anything else. You are my sister who I can depend on for anything."

"...Really?"

"Of course! To be honest, when we were kids, I sometimes thought it would be better if I had a little brother. I thought it would be fun if I had a mischievous little brother I could rough house with…"

"That's really what you thought?"

"When we were kids, yeah. Now, I truly feel from the very bottom of my heart that I am happy to have you. You're stronger and more dependable than any man."

"Brother!" She realized that he was teasing her, and her face turned red.

Ephraim burst out laughing.

Seth listened to their conversation with a smile on his face, then opened his mouth. "Lord Ephraim, Lady Eirika. I'm sorry to do this while you are both tired, but there is something I want to confirm right away…"

"That's right. The Sacred Stone." Ephraim caught on to what he was talking about.

Seth nodded and continued, "The late Lord Fado entrusted me with these words before Renais fell. 'Raise the Twin Bracelets in the throne room. The seal will break, and the Sacred Stone will be sleeping before you.'"

"The time has finally come for these bracelets to serve their purpose, huh?" Ephraim rubbed his bracelet.

Eirika looked down at her own bracelet.

Ever since she had learned the true meaning it held, she'd felt many times just how heavy of a burden it was. But now, all of that hardship was finally going to pay off.

Since the Sacred Stone was enshrined behind the seal, it should be safe, however, until she saw it with her own eyes, she would be nervous. 

The twins both turned towards the throne room.

The moment they raised their bracelets, a space in the stone floor opened without a sound, revealing a long staircase that led into a basement. Even they'd had no idea that the palace had a mechanism like that within it.

Ephraim picked up a candlestick and went first down the stairs. Eirika and Seth followed him.

At the bottom of the stairs was a small room. Within it was an altar, and placed atop it was a small stone.

For a long while, the three of them stared at it and spoke not a word. It reflected off of the light of Ephraim's candle, and emitted its own strange, glittering light. Both its color and gloss were completely unlike any other stone on earth.

"This is… the Sacred Stone?" Ephraim finally said. His voice was so quiet it was almost a whisper. 

Eirika nodded. "Yes. It is one of the five Stones that sealed away the Demon King long ago…"

"If the bracelets had been stolen, then this Stone probably would have been destroyed around now, huh? This is the power that we were able to protect all this time."

"It is the hope of everyone… of all the people who live on our continent."

Ephraim reached out and gently picked it up. “Now let's get back to everyone."

"Please wait, Brother." Eirika noticed that the bracelets had started to emit a strange light, and called out to him.

Ephraim looked down at his bracelet as well. Both of them were emitting a faint white glittery light. It was a phenomenon that neither of them had ever witnessed until now.

It wasn’t hot. It just gave Eirika a strange sensation that she was being filled by a power flowing out from her bracelet. She looked down at it in surprise.

���Is it… reacting to the Sacred Stone…?” Ephraim wondered.

“Brother, can you... feel something?” Eirika looked into Ephraim’s eyes, and could sense that he was experiencing the same sensation as well.

“Yeah. What could it be…? It… It feels like strength is bursting out from deep within me. I can’t put it into words exactly, but… It’s like I quickly climbed up to somewhere high and the world has opened up below me… or like I broke out from an old shell and was reborn… Regardless, it’s a very strange feeling.”

"I feel the same."

Of course, the feeling didn't necessarily mean that they changed at all on the outside. They were the same Ephraim and Eirika as always. But now, they undoubtedly felt all the effects of obtaining a new power.

Seth said to them, "Your bracelets are the proof that you are the rightful heirs to the throne of Renais. The Sacred Stone most likely divided the power of Renais' royal family between you."

Ephraim nodded. "...Father might have anticipated that this day would come, when the bracelets and the Sacred Stone would lead us in the right direction."

The light coming from the bracelets gradually dimmed, but there was no doubt they could still feel the power flowing through them. 

Ephraim muttered, as if he was talking to himself, "Since... I was a child, I've only ever wanted to get stronger. If I became the strongest king in the world, then ruling my country would come naturally. That's what I always thought…"

Eirika knew that was how he'd thought. As someone who hated war, she felt that line of thinking was a bit scary, but she understood well that he wasn't a violent person. No matter how powerful he became, she believed that he would never misuse his strength.

However, their father had worried about Ephraim's way of thinking. 'One cannot not rule a country by strength alone. You must see more of the world, and learn as much as you can.' He had warned him. 

At the time, Ephraim rebelled against his father and argued with him about it. Every time they did so, it hurt Eirika's heart, and made her think about which of their words was right. She respected her father's reasoning and character, but on the other hand, she also admired her brother's strength. 'Neither of them are wrong…' That was the only conclusion she could ever think to come to in regards to it.

"The moment I heard that Grado had invaded Renais, blood rushed to my head. I wanted to chase out the invaders with my own lance, and bravely set out to war. The result of that is the disaster that Renais is experiencing now. Back then… if I had been prudent like Father was, I might not have just fought by brute strength alone, and been able to think of a better way…"

"Brother, Father was proud of you." She couldn't stand to see Ephraim blame himself, and so she cut his words short. 

Seth politely added his thoughts as well. "Lady Eirika is right. Lord Fado always said that you will surely become a fine king."

Ephraim looked down at the floor and made a pained smile. "I'm not ready yet. It will probably be a long time yet before I'm able to live up to Father's expectations of me." 

He looked down at the Sacred Stone in his hand and suddenly offered it to Eirika. "Eirika, you take this."

"Huh? But that's the…"

"I think you're more worthy to be the one to carry it. Like I just said, I have a tendency to always rely on strength. I want to try to suppress it as much as I possibly can, but if I fly into a rage and lose myself, I might try to use its power for the wrong reasons."

"But…"

"And the Sacred Stone harbors great power. It might protect you if your life is ever in danger. Please take it."

"...I understand. If you insist." Eirika took the Sacred Stone from her brother's hand. "One day, when we welcome true peace, and you officially ascend to the throne, let's return it to this underground altar. But until then, I'll take good care of it."

"Yes, let's! It is a precious treasure that must be passed down to each generation of Renais' royal family."

"Lord Ephraim, Lady Eirika!" Seth called out. "Renais' Sacred Twins should be kept here. Please take them."

"Oh, that's right!"

Beneath the altar was a chest. Seth first pulled a long lance out from within it, and carefully handed it to Ephraim.

Ephraim examined it and gasped. "What a beautiful weapon this is… no matter the craftsman that made the lance, none other has ever felt so perfect in my hands. So this is one of Renais' Sacred Twins? There's an engraving on it here. It reads… 'Flame Lance Siegmund…'"

Seth then took a sword from inside the chest, and gave it to Eirika. "And you take this, Lady Eirika."

"Thank you. This one has an engraving on it as well. It reads 'Storm Blade Sieglinde…'" Eirika stood next to Ephraim, and tried it out, swinging it up over her head.

It was much bigger than the rapier she was used to using, but it was so easy to wield that it surprised her. It even felt like the sword moved faster than her own body.

Long ago, the hero and progenitor of the Renais royal family used this sword to fight the Demon King's forces. This beautiful sword that looked more like a magnificent work of art at first glance had spilled the blood of thousands of monsters. The moment that thought ran through her mind, she suddenly felt its weight.

"It might be best to end the war without using a weapon like this, but…" Eirika lowered the sword and murmured. "If we fear fighting and run away from it, that will invite an even bigger calamity… This war taught me that. Let's fight, Brother. To restore Renais. To bring peace to Magvel."

[adamwatchesmovies]

The Best of 2019

What a year. By the time 2019 ended, I had seen over 130 new movies. It's actually probably closer to 150 but I lost count. There are a few titles I missed, such as The Dead Don’t Die, The Fanatic and Honeyland so obviously, this is not an all-encompassing, definitive list of 2019’s best, but it should give you a good idea of which films you need to check out if you haven’t already.

I usually like to save the #10 spot on my list for a movie that’s just for me. Normally, this would mean a giant monster movie, an off-beat creation nobody else saw, a comic book movie that spoke to my particular tastes or maybe a Canadian movie I know didn’t get the opportunity to shine like it should’ve. This year, that’s not happening. Trimming my list down to 10 was hard enough. I certainly wasn’t going to sacrifice one more to make it just 9. Let's dig in.

10. The Farewell

It’s been weeks since The Farewell and I’m still thinking about it. If I was put in the same position as Billi, I'm not sure what I'd do? Is it better to tell someone that's dying that their days are numbered, or should you spare them from that burden? Is it really them you’d be sparing, or is keeping the secret for your own selfish needs? Writer/director Lulu Wang asks serious questions about culture I had never contemplated before. There’s a lot for you here and even more if your family comes from mixed backgrounds.

9. A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

I heard some complaints about Fred Rogers (Tom Hanks) not being the main character of this film by Marielle Heller, from writers Micah Fitzerman-Blue and Noah Harpster. It was the right choice. The plot has a cyical reporter meet Rogers and through their relatively brief interaction, learn what we knew going in. It delivers a moving character arc without having to stain its subject with flaws we didn't want to see. The quasi-meta presentation is what elevates it into top-10 status. That extra touch means it does a lot more than simply re-iterate what we saw in the 2018 documentary Won't You Be My Neighbor?.

8. Knives Out

Knives Out is one of the most entertaining films all year. There are no profound moments of meditation, no earth-shattering realizations about yourself, just a mystery to be solved. All the suspects are so intriguing they could be the stars of their own movies. Put together in the same house as a dead body and you’ve got no idea who did it. Its screenplay is excellent. The twists are juicy. Everything ads up in a satisfying manner. Rian Johnson is already working on a sequel. I can’t wait.

7. Apollo 11

There are few holdovers from the list I made halfway through the year, which either says something about the strength of the second half of 2019, or the weakness of the first. Either way, you’ve got to see Apollo 11. It’s the closest thing to going back in time and being there when man landed on the moon. The tension and anticipation are overwhelming. Knowing what happened doesn't matter. The way the footage is assembled is nothing short of incredible. Why this documentary wasn't present at the Academy Awards is beyond me.

6. Uncut Gems

Adam Sandler should’ve been nominated for an Oscar. He wasn’t. I’ll bet you dollars to donuts it's because of his association with all of those brain-dead Happy Madison Production comedies. His history with cinema shouldn't matter. The movie is what matters. The fact is, this was the perfect role for him. It isn’t even that Sandler’s doing something different, it’s that he’s being used to his full potential. If you weren’t glued to the screen, eager to see what’s coming next, this movie would have you jumping out of the window screaming - anything to escape the anxiety the Safdie Brothers serve up with devilish grins.

5. The Lighthouse

Next on my list is The Lighthouse. Right away, the aspect ratio and black-and-white cinematography lets you know you’re in for something different. You have no idea. What I love so much about this film is the way it handles madness. At the end of the day, I’m not sure if I could tell you if Robert Pattinson’s character was crazy, if Willem Dafoe’s character was the nutty one, or if they both were. It shows you just enough to make you doubt your own sanity. It’s also unexpectedly funny, which makes it feel oddly genuine. In one scene, Robert Pattinson's Ephraim Winslow gets a hold of the lighthouse's logs. In it, his boss, Thomas (Willem Dafoe) recommends Ephraim be disciplined for masturbating excessively. Considering Thomas has been cavorting with some kind of tentacle creature up in the lighthouse (at least that's what I think I saw, I'm not so sure anymore), all you can do is laugh. What kind of loony bin is this turning into? One I'm looking forward to revisiting.

4. 1917

Shot in a way that makes it all look like one take, 1917 is a technical marvel. It hooks itself up to your circular system and steadily replaces your blood with pure, undistilled stress. As you're about to flatline, it stops and gives you a breather. A shot of a meadow untouched by the ravages of war; a reminder of what the soldiers are fighting for and of how utterly devastating armed combat is on humanity as a whole. Gorgeous cinematography, powerful emotions, magnificent production values.

3. Joker

Along with Godzilla: King of the Monsters (a movie they basically made for me), this was my most anticipated movie of the year. To get ready, I watched Taxi Driver and The King of Comedy, two Scorsese films Joker director Todd Phillips drew a lot of inspiration from. For some reason, it seems as though many critics took offense to the similarities. Sometimes I understand differing opinions from mine. This time, I don’t. It’s a great film that warns of the dangers of letting people like Arthur Fleck (brilliantly performed by Joaquin Phoenix) fall through the cracks. Left unchecked, he discovers that by doing terrible things, he becomes a “better” version of himself. It’s not a drama. It’s a horror movie that spins the familiar Batman archenemy in a new direction but also stays true to the character. There are several scenes in this movie that are going to be permanently imprinted in my brain. Those stairs. Need I say more?

Runner-ups

Avengers: Endgame

Even if every single Marvel movie going forward is awful, this caps off the whopping 22-chapter saga epically. A couple of aspects bugged me enough that it could only manage to make the runner-up list but it's a terrific film.

Booksmart

The funniest comedy of the year. I think back to Amy and Molly using their hairs as masks and still can't manage to hold back a few chuckles months later.

Toy Story 4

This one was hard to cut. The only flaw I could find was that it isn’t on the same level as 3… even though they’re both 5-star movies.

Midsommar

I’ve heard the extended cut is even better than the original. I wish I’d had the chance to see it in theatres.

Jojo Rabbit

Audacious and heartfelt. I loved those scenes of Scarlett Johanson being a mom. Her agent might've dropped the ball getting her cast in Ghost in the Shell but she sure knew how to pick great work in 2019.

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

Quentin Tarantino brings us back to a time when Roman Polanski was simply a good director instead of a convicted rapist, movie stars were untouchable, and the death of someone’s wife under mysterious circumstances was nothing to raise eyebrows about. It’s not a movie that screams “here and now”. If anything, it’s regressive. That said, I cannot deny the experience I had watching it. It’s a once-in-a-lifetime kinda thing and I doubt even Tarantino could pull it off again. I wonder how many people went in knowing what happened to Sharon Tate like I did.

Marriage story

It’s nothing but raw emotion and powerhouse performances in this drama about two people you love going through a divorce. I always make it my goal to watch movies all the way through without any interruptions. Several times throughout, I was tempted to hit "Pause" so I could catch my breath.

Internet lists are everywhere. You know why, don’t you? They suck you in and when you get down to it, most don’t require all that much effort to put together. Except when I make them, apparently. These bi-annual lists always turn out to be difficult to put together. 2019's proved particularly arduous. I’m fairly sure that my #3 movie belongs there. Out of all the movies on this list, it’s probably the one I’m going to go back to most often. The other two? I’d say that technically, one may be better than the other but I think the other one is “more important” so that gives it the edge. What I’m trying to say is, they’re all winners and on a different day, I might even swap them around.

2. Little Women

I have only seen three of the seven silver screen adaptations of Louisa May Alcott’s novel and I don’t expect any of the others to top this one. The secret ingredient to this one's success is Greta Gerwig. Writing and directing, she does so much more than merely translate the classic to movie form. She re-arranges the story to give the events a greater punch than they would if they were shown chronologically and puts a little more emphasis on a couple of key moments (that tear-jerking Christmas, for example) to crank up the emotion. She also makes it more modern without having to change anything about the setting or characters. Admittedly, the back-and-forth between the past and present is a little jarring at first - makes you wonder what Greta Gerwig could’ve done had she been given the de-aging budget Martin Scorsese was given - but that’s where the performances and costumes come in. It takes mere moments before you get what the movie is doing. I’ve said it already but it made me cry.

1. Parasite

To make this list, I didn’t go through all of my past reviews and check which ones were rated what. I thought back to which movies gave me the most vivid memories, which ones gave me the biggest reactions. I’m still not sure how I feel about the final final moment but there’s so much about Parasite that I admire. This would be a great one to watch with others just to see their reactions to the reveal about the bookcase.

[crystalelemental]

Oh man.  GamePress apparently updated the offensive tier list to be AR exclusive, and boy have there been some changes.  You know I have opinions on this one.

Okay let’s start with the obvious part: how in the hell is any Legendary hero considered above Tier 2?  Like, are we not factoring in score?  Or are we only accounting for if they score well?  Because realistically, half the time, a legendary hero is an active detriment to the scoring.  Also it turns out this isn’t just offense, but both offense AND defense, since Mirabilis is Tier 1.  So that’s gonna be...honestly, a bit confusing.  I’m sure some people can tell which is which, but I’m willing to bet others aren’t clear.

Let’s start with the biggest changes at the top.  Eliwood and Brave Roy are now Tier 1, likely because Galeforce.  Nothing else is different that I can tell.  Maybe some demotion?  But nothing substantial.  Lysithea is finally recognized as Tier 1, and I’m certain it’s because of her power on AR-D.  Girl is obscene.  Otherwise, Fallen Julia is the only other T1 Red Mage, and damn good on her.  Idunn demoted, but honestly, fair.  AR is not for her.  Armor units are not hard to handle, and are pretty bad on offense.  Especially with Thrasir existing, armor dragons just have a rough go.  Spring Idunn and Tibarn alone are T1.  What I do find interesting is that Dancer Micaiah didn’t maintain.  I guess the Hardy Bearing effect isn’t as impressive anymore.  Also Karla stayed T2, that’s...astonishing, actually.  Duo Byleth is also T2, which kinda makes sense.  Defense can’t make use of her Duo skill, and her bulk is pathetic, so any typical ranged defense unit can handle her.  On offense, it’s going to be tough.  Desperation effect is good, but conditional on having a fast team, not to mention Galeforce sets can require the foe to retaliate, like with Eliwood/Brave Roy.  So I can’t say I’m surprised she’s not on top.

Lance seems to just be B!Lucina, Duo Ephraim, and Trio Palla.  Which is fair.  Blue mages, though?  Damn is this crowded.  L!Azura and Peony, because obscene dancers.  Ophelia, because bitch.  Duo Alphonse, because immortality.  Brunnya, because honestly Fimbulvetr is perfect for this game mode, and she’s got the infantry status and abilities to do whatever she wants.  And L!Julia.  I’m willing to bet she’s more AR-D focused.  Rafiel and L!Chrom are also T1, of course.  I think what really surprises me is that Reinhardt is T2.  Is anyone else surprised about this?  I guess he’s not the most threatening thing in the world anymore, but still.  Actually wait, what’s REALLY neat is that Naga is T3.  So clearly scoring considerations are not paramount.

Axes have V!Duo Alm, Annette, L!Edelgard, and B!Ike.  Because of course.  All of them are ridiculous.  Mages have L!Celica, Thrasir, and Fallen Lyon, with beasts/dragons having Reyson.  Which, again, makes sense.  I’m glad Surtr demoted to T2.  I really don’t think of him as the most threatening aspect of AR anymore, even on dedicated stall, so this feels overdue.  Yune’s also T2, which..okay, fair.  While I think she’s great, she’s a ranged flying unit who plays defense, and her debuff game is crippled severely by Eir’s bonuses.  It’s super weird that F!Kana demoted, though.  She was T1 before, and that was entirely based on AR potential, so...okay.  Guess the meta has shifted hard enough against her.  Also, big shoutouts to Julia for maintaining T2 status.  That’s my girl.

Bows have L!Alm, L!Leif, V!Faye, and Duo Marth.  I can’t speak for Duo Marth, I don’t have him, but I feel like the fact I’ve never faced one means he’s at least not good on AR-D.  I can vouch for V!Faye, though, holy shit.  In fact can we establish Tier 0 for the primordial beings that break the world over their knees?  Anyway, Bernadetta and B!Lyn are T2, and I’m betting that’s for hit-and-run offense teams.  Also Norne’s T2 now, which is super correct.  I’ve felt this for a while, and the forum backs me up pretty hard on it: Norne’s the best common archer by a mile.  But of course, you all know what I’m going to say.  There is no way Faye is T3.  I have played her ranged defense game long enough to know that she is really strong at it.  While some threats like Lysithea can blow past her, and Thrasir isn’t always one-shot with my current supports, she is very capable of performing better than T3.  Also, poor Clarisse.  Finally gets a kickass refine that’s just not particularly great for AR, and instead of climbing the ranks of the offensive tier list, they change the conditions on her.  Girl can’t catch a break.

Dagger/Mage combos have, of course, Bramimond, Leila, Eir, and Duo Micaiah.  Absolutely no surprises here.  What is surprising, maybe just to me, is that Winter Cecilia is down to T3.  She was considered T2 for a long while, and I’d guessed that was based on AR potential.  I guess Duo Micaiah is causing substantial problems for armors across the board?  But man, Larum is T2.  LARUM.  Larum sucks, what could she possibly be doing that’s useful?

Dragons/Beasts have Fallen Female Corrin, Leanne, Mila, and Velouria.  I love everything about this.  Leanne makes sense for Defense teams, Velouria is a great Galeforcer, Mila is probably the best Light mythic for supertank strategies, and Fallen Female Corrin makes me happy because Fallen Male Corrin is only T2.  Get fucked, loser.  Your higher BST does nothing for your shit ass.  I do think there’s an argument for Caineghis in T1 for an offensive supertank, but honestly, he struggles.  To a degree I’d say he’s worse than Faye.  We don’t have any beast Mythics, and the only offensive dragon is Mila.  His DC is conditional on transforming, and he’s an armor unit.  He can’t run Null C-Disrupt, or Null Follow-Up like she can, so there are defense teams that can beat him by exploiting this.  I feel like Faye’s a lot better, but hey, what do I know.

And finally, staves.  Bridal Fjorm is the only one in T1.  Brave Veronica actually dropped, which is funny because she was T1 before solely on AR.  She doesn’t place in Arena.  I guess the meta has shifted away from Brave Veronica lately.  I haven’t been scared of one in a long time.  And hey, Maribelle is T2 as well, and Forrest got pushed up to T3!  Unfortunately, Brave Camilla was reduced to T3, so she’s still below B!Veronica.  Which in this game mode I guess is fair.

Now for the opposite end of the spectrum.  There are now 6 tiers, which I like.  I feel the subdivisions are appropriate, we have enough units that categorization was tough.  T4 for lances and swords was like 60 units before, I’m glad it got cleaned up a bit.  For red stuff, Alfonse remains at the bottom, but is no longer alone.  NY!Camilla, Chrom, V!Conrad, Beach Fiora, Hinata, and NY!Hrid are also down there.  Haha, Hrid, get fucked you loser.  That’s for January 2019, you fuck.  Mages here include Canas, Julius (ouch), Leo, Beach Leo, Raigh, and Beach Lorenz.  No surprises.  There are no dragons, daggers, or bows for red down here, the lowest they go is T4.  Hysterically, every form of red Tiki is in T4.  Also, maybe this is me not understanding something, but NY!Anna and NY!Eir in T4 surprises me.  I thought their weapons were considered great team support.  Are their stats just not optimized for it? 

T6 lances are many.  Too many, I’m not listing all of that.  What I will say is, tell my Forma Finn running on the double cav Galeforce defense team that he’s T6.  Considering I only lost two matches at all last season, and only 38 Lift, I’d say he’s doing alright.  But there are probably better options out there, I’m just working with what I have.  Mages are just Oliver and M!Robin.  Man, I hope M!Robin goes up with the resplendent.  Leave Oliver to die.  No dragons, bows, or daggers, they’re all up in T4 where...where...no.  No, there’s no way.  Lilith has warp abilities from anywhere.  NAESALA is considered T4, despite being paired with Tibarn for some of the nastiest offensive AR-D strategies out there.  Mordecai has the Smite thing.  I don’t agree with this at all.  And Ninian is T3?  Even though she’s one of the top picks for Infantry Pulse AR-D dancers?  I know Nils exists and is better in every way pretty much, but that’s a bit much to me.  I think the blue dragon/beast section is the most ridiculous by far.

There are also a lot of axes down in T6, but I agree with all of them.  The green mages make me sad, though.  Picnic Leo, Cecilia, and Female Robin.  I do think F!Robin has a lot of utility within the game, but...honestly they’re super right, she cannot possibly compete in AR.  Defense teams have no use for her, and offensive teams using her as a support are a bad idea with Panic Manor around.  Mostly Cecilia makes my heart hurt.  Come on, IS.  Null C-Disrupt Raven Tome when?  As with the other tiers, all dragons, bows, and daggers of this color are higher ranked.  That said, L!Lyn in T5.  Get fucked.  There’s also...absolutely nothing controversial about their T4 picks.  Green’s pretty well sorted, good job team.

The only colorless option with units in T6 are healers, where we have Azama, Mist, Wrys, Sakura, and Lissa.  Nothing controversial here.  In fact, nothing controversial in T5, either.  What is sad but super true, is that F!Grima’s here.  All the other colorless beasts and dragons are clustered in T1 and T2, but she’s down in T5.  Expiration refine when?  Felicia and Jaffar are the lowest ranked daggers, to no one’s surprise.  None of the bows are shocking either, except I’m kinda surprised Niles isn’t at least a little higher.  I feel like his massive Res must account for something when attempting to tank out the many ranged magic threats on AR-D, right?

Overall, I...actually agree with the majority of this.  It’s a solid tierlist for Aether Raids.  There are some things I don’t entirely agree with, but would have trouble arguing in their favor in the current meta.  Like Micaiah.  As we move entirely away from armor units, Micaiah becomes less and less significant.  I do think the blue dragon/beast section could take some revisiting, given that goddamn Naesala is down in T4, but one area that seems off isn’t bad when you have so much to organize.  I like it.  Definitely a lot better than the previous list, because at least now we’re specialized.  Before, there was always an argument that a certain unit was better or worse based on performance in a specific area.  But here, it’s more stable.  I’m not sure if there’s intent to make an Arena one, or if that’s even necessary since scoring is a lot more specific for Arena, but we’ll see.

[mittensmorgul]

9.06, Heaven Can't Wait.

YAY! BOBO!

so I neglected to mention Buddy Boyle and Bartholomew the fallen angel, and all the angel factions forming in the 9.03 report because I was trying to get through it as fast as possible, but ugh... guess I gotta mention them eventually. There, I mentioned them, just about as much as this episode did. :P

But this is directly relevant to Cas's current state of mind, which is relevant to the overall plot of this episode, because of Rit Zien angel and why he's come to this town where Cas has tried to make a life for himself as Sales Associate Steve. The Rit Zien seeks out pain-- originally mortal wounds on battlefields-- and either heals or else "humanely puts down" angels he cannot heal. Except, as Cas will explain in this episode, he doesn't understand human emotions, and that emotional pain is temporary... and then we learn that the Rit Zien was drawn to this town by the magnitude of Cas's suffering specifically. Which, if that's not a statement on Cas's current emotional state, I don't know what is.

The first victim we see is a man who literally hangs up on a suicide prevention hotline because he lost his wife. He even has a gun, but changes his mind when faced with the Rit Zien, but he gets exploded into pink goo anyway.

The next is a high school girl suffering a normal level of teenage angst, telling a friend she could just die of embarrassment because her boyfriend broke up with her in the cafeteria in front of everyone but in no way meaning it literally, and poof... pain disintegrated.

Despite his own pain having been kicked out of the bunker and feeling completely abandoned by Dean, Cas still calls Dean to alert him to the strange cases in town, but tells Dean he won't participate in the hunt. Dean manages to track Cas down working at the Gas N Sip anyway (Cas never told him where he worked), and pulls Cas into working the case with him.

There's the whole Nora thing, which Cas thought was a date but was actually a babysitting job... When the Rit Zien shows up for Cas, he thinks it's for the baby, running a fever and crying. But he's actually there for Cas.

CASTIEL: How'd you find me? EPHRAIM: Because you're warded? The same way I find all my patients – I just followed the sound of your pain. You have no idea how loud it is. I could hear you for miles.

And then the question we've been waiting on an answer for ever since:

EPHRAIM: Shh-shh-shhh. It'll be over soon. I'll take the pain away. CASTIEL: I want to live. EPHRAIM: But as what, Castiel? As an angel? or a man?

Because back in s9, this question remains directly tied to PAIN. To SUFFERING.

CASTIEL (to the baby): Nobody told you. Nobody explained. You're just … shoved out kicking and screaming into this human life, without any idea why any of it feels the way it feels, or why this confusion, which feels like it's … a hair's breadth (The baby stops crying.) from terror or pain. You know, just when you think you do understand, it'll turn out you're wrong. You didn't understand anything at all. Guess that's just how it is when you're new at this.

He thought he understood, and he's only just beginning to truly understand (and I mean, Crowley as almost-human this season too, despite having been human originally long ago, still suffers with the burden of human emotions, equating what demons and angels are capable of feeling even way back here, long before 10.03 when Cas will make that same comparison).

Cas is feeling the guilt of what's happened to the angels, and he's already hurting over it. So when Sam and Kevin discover (with Crowley's help) that the angel fall spell is irreversible, Dean doesn't tell Cas that fact thinking he's protecting Cas from even worse guilt. But meanwhile, it's still a major source of Cas's pain (and Dean's pain, because hell if he doesn't want to bring Cas back to the bunker here, but can't as long as Sam isn't healed enough...)

EVERYBODY'S SUFFERING! Lies all around. Dean specifically tells Sam that he won't be seeing Cas on this hunt, and yet he spends the entire time pretty much with Cas. But also Dean, lying to everyone, trying to manage his mounting lies in the name of protecting (or in the language of 14.08, "not wanting to burden them") or just out of pure FEAR because this situation is officially so far above his pay grade and he can't even talk to ANYONE about how bad it actually is without the whole thing crumbling down around him... and that's not even considering the Fallen Angels Fighting Amongst Themselves situation on top of all his personal shit...

Which interestingly is paralleled in the experiences of young Dean in the flashbacks in the next episode...

spn 9.07, Bad Boys.

Dean's put in a situation way above his pay grade, having been left to "rot" by John after getting in trouble for shoplifting enough for him and Sam to eat while John was off somewhere else on a hunt and Dean had been left in charge again. John had demanded that Dean tell Sam a very different story, one that not only covered Dean's "shame" at having been caught shoplifting and abandoned by John for several months while Sam was "shipped off to Bobby's" (and remember, Sam would've been about 11 years old at the time, ie old enough to have understood the truth of the situation, but maybe not why John refused to get Dean from Sonny's, that to John this was a form of punishment for Dean-- both isolation from everything he's ever known AND forced separation from Sam, like John was punishing him for failing to take care of Sam by isolating him completely...), but also was about John hiding his OWN culpability in any of this happening in the first place. Child abandonment, neglect, the fact he regularly left the boys on their own and disappeared for weeks or months at a time leaving them to fend for themselves on whatever meager sum he left them. Which, I mean, YIIIIIKES.

And this episode was really the start of my "sanitized for sammy" and "the story became the story" tags, of how fundamental to their codependency these small lies have always been, since they were children (and yeah, we saw that going all the way back to s1, with 1.18, 3.08, 4.13... pretty much all the flashback episodes, but this is where Dean gave that calculated deception a name-- "the story became the story.")

We really see the extent of Dean's lifelong struggle with managing all these secrets begins to break down, which exactly parallels his "bigger story arc" issues in early s9. With all that in mind, it's no wonder he breaks and feels his ultimate failure connected with the collapse of the tower of lies that all started with the best of intentions, and just spiraled out of his control. All in the name of protecting his loved ones.

Kinda like Dean trying to keep John's horrific final words from Sam back in s2 (even though that only lasted a few episodes), kinda like Sam hiding the truth back in s4, kinda like Cas hiding the truth in s6. So now they all will have this fun little problem in common (less dumb, less ass...)

But more interesting to me than the actual circumstances of this episode specifically, is how these lies begin to slowly unravel throughout the episode, and how the truth finally coming out affects everything going forward.

First Sam begins to learn the truth about that time, but it's still not really the whole truth. Dean plays it off as his own fault, shrugging the experience off. Sam also can't figure out why Dean's not only kept in touch with Sonny all these years, but also actually told him the truth about the hunting. The deeper truth slowly comes out in bits and pieces. And then there's Robin, who Dean never told the truth to in the past who learns it all in a shocking way... seeing it first-hand.

This had been Dean's one real "escape to normalcy" of the sort that Sam had spent most of his life running away toward (and which Dean's being forced by circumstance now to push Cas toward... let's not forget that the original airing order of these episodes put 9.06 AFTER this episode... which is why I've smooshed the two of these into one way-too-long post). And let's remember that it was only Dean's need to make sure Sam was safe that got him to leave Sonny's and return to John. He talked about his interest in fixing cars in this episode, and he could've had that life if he'd chosen to stay, because Sonny agreed to fight for him if he wanted that.

But even by the end of the episode, Sam only knows part of the truth, and Dean's still trying to protect himself with that tiny shard of a lie:

Sam: You just got lucky? Kind of like you did with this place. I mean, here I was thinking this was the worst part of your life, and it turns out it was the best. Why'd you ever leave? Dean: Never felt right. Sam: Really? Dean: It was two months, Sam, okay? And I couldn't wait to get out of here. I don't know what to tell you. It wasn't me.

And he can't bring himself to burden Sam with the truth, that it was literally Sam himself and his duty to protect him that made him choose to leave.

Then there's Timmy, losing his mother in a fire, Dean thinking it's the "I Clobber Evil" action figure that the mother's ghost is tied to, when in fact it was Timmy himself. Because it's not exactly that Dean sees himself in Timmy-- repeatedly running away from foster homes, clinging to "imaginary friends" -- It's SAM. He talks to Timmy like we have to imagine 16-year-old Dean would've talked to SAM. And doesn't that just say it all here.

And using this “decoder ring” of a couple episodes to help us unravel what happens when these dudes try to protect each other, to “not burden each other” with these sorts of secrets, things almost universally go sideways. Because this is, yes, what Cas was thinking in hiding his deal with the Empty to trade himself for Jack, but it’s also the sort of smaller concerns from each other regarding Jack’s behavior after 14.14. Each of them were worried for Jack, each of them had noticed small things in Jack, but NONE of them wanted to admit the truth to themselves, let alone to each other. Each of them held their tongues, not wanting to worry each other over Jack, or unfairly burden each other for nothing when all they really have are their individual suspicions and no actual concrete evidence that Jack’s soul is actually gone, you know? But the consequences of trying to protect each other are far more grave in s14...

[fragmentedshards]

The Final Curtain, Chapter Seventeen

Disclosing Not His Lover

-

The night of the party arrived more swiftly than they expected. With the addition of the servants, their party had grown considerably. It was decided that Bryony would stay at the manor and help Tanaka care for Ephraim, and since Snake had no interest in attending a fancy ball, he took on the task of looking after the ballerina. The others would all go as one; Ciel, Elizabeth, Prince Soma, Lau, Ran Mao, Sebastian, Paula, Agni, Bardroy, Mei Rin, Finny, Matilda, and to Matilda’s great surprise and joy, Undertaker himself.

“You’ll really attend?” she exclaimed happily when he ventured to the manor to tell her the news.

“Of course dearie,” he chuckled. “I might not be one to frequent these parties myself, but as your husband and escort, I ought to go and keep watch, oughtn’t I?”

Matilda rushed to embrace the mortician gleefully, then looked up at him through his bangs. “What about Grell, is she coming?”

Undertaker stroked Matilda’s hair, which she had taken to wearing tied back these days rather than letting her curls explode like she ordinarily did. “I think William stuck her with some paperwork. Besides,” he added dolefully. “I don’t think she enjoys these as much anymore, partly because she remembers Madam Red, and partly because she can’t wear dresses the way she wants to.”

“I’ve been working on something that may help her!” the maid grinned, cupping her husband’s face. He smiled down at her, full of admiration. “Tell her to just hold on!”

~

Paula helped Lady Elizabeth into her favorite crimson dress, adding a white mask with tiny red roses around the eyes. “Oh, Paula, don’t forget,” the young lady reminded her maid, who smiled coyly at her before reaching for Lady Elizabeth’s secret weapon to hide it in the back of her dress.

“I’m so happy to see you finally putting all that training to use,” Paula gushed as she tied all of Lady Elizabeth’s many fastenings. “It’s been torturous to watch you pushed aside all this time, milady, simply torturous.”

Elizabeth smiled at her faithful Paula, trying to shake away her nervousness.

Meanwhile in another room, Ciel glowered at his reflection as Sebastian dressed him. Viscount Druitt’s party was not so much a costume ball as it was a masquerade ball, so instead of wearing a full costume the earl merely donned fine evening clothing with a black lace mask over the top half of his face.

“Frankly, it’s a relief to have this off from time to time,” he said as he undid the string of his eyepatch. “I may as well leave it off when I’m at home, now that everyone knows. At any rate, this mask covers my eyes well enough so nobody can tell.”

Sebastian, having finished dressing the earl, bowed and headed downstairs to don his red mask and cloak. Before reaching his room, he spotted Mei Rin sitting on her bed and puzzling over her eyeglasses. Tentatively, he knocked on the door. “Is everything alright?”

Mei Rin glanced up momentarily at the knock, then returned to what she was doing. “I’m torn,” she admitted. “These were a gift from the young master. They helped me hide my ability. But... they created lots of problems, didn’t they?”

Sebastian, to his own surprise, smiled fondly as he remembered Mei Rin’s numerous housekeeping blunders. “We did offer to get your prescription changed, more than once,” he reminded her.

She gave a soft laugh, but not out of humor. Then, without warning, she broke the glass out of the lenses, sending shards scattering onto the floor. Sebastian’s jaw fell open, unsure what to do until he saw the blood on the maid’s fingers, which she seemed not to have noticed herself. Stepping into the room, he brought the water basin from the dresser to the bed and gently placed her hands in it, taking care to delicately search for any pieces of glass that may have stuck in her fingers.

“Mei Rin, honestly,” he chided as he worked. “Why do you always break things?”

Rather than be insulted, Mei Rin laughed. “At least this time it was on purpose,” she replied, getting a laugh from the butler. She wasn’t quite sure what to make of this. Sebastian was never this careful with anyone but the young master, and yet here he was checking her fingers for glass and wiping away blood with his handkerchief. She hadn’t even seen where he had produced the bandages from, but next thing she knew the cuts on her fingers were wrapped up and the butler was staring at her, exasperated but satisfied.

Just then Bardroy rounded the corner, snapping them back to life. “Oi, Mei Rin, are you-” Seeming to notice Sebastian for the first time, he turned red and backed away silently.

“There,” Sebastian sighed, placing Mei Rin’s hands back in her lap. “Those should hold nicely, and I doubt they will be visible through evening gloves. I’ll leave you to get ready now.” As he was leaving, glass crunching beneath his shoes, he turned and added, “You could always use the eyeglass frames for your mask, if you chose. Though, I think we have all become quite accustomed to seeing you with them, so it wouldn’t be much of a mask.”

~

When the group arrived to the party, the moon was already high in the velvet sky, and lively music pervaded Viscount Druitt’s home.

Lau guided Ran Mao through the sea of people, saying to her “I suspect this will be even more interesting than the last costume ball we attended. What do you think, Ran Mao?”

Instead of answering his question, Ran Mao muttered, “This is not a costume ball.”

The Viscount was easily spotted among his guests, wearing a garish mask of all colors, with feathers and other adornments all over it. Elizabeth grasped Soma’s hand and nodded her head in the direction of the Viscount, whispering a hasty summary of her plan to him.

“I’ll strike up a conversation with him about something unassuming, such as clothing,” she whispered as the two danced awkwardly. “With any luck, he will ask me to dance, and then I can get closer to him, allowing me to investigate further.”

The prince nodded, spinning her with more grace than she expected as the music stopped. Viscount Druitt had noticed them and was walking towards them from the far side of the ballroom. “What do I do?” Soma whispered back, pretending to kiss her cheek.

“Find someone else to dance with, or better yet, you and Agni create a diversion with traditional Bengali dancing!” Elizabeth whispered just as the Viscount reached them.

“You both dance most intriguingly, young ones,” he smiled down at them, placing his hands together. “Watching you was fascinating.”

Elizabeth curtsied, nudging Prince Soma to bow. “Thank you very much, my lord,” she said, making her voice as sickly-sweet as she could manage. “I’m so flattered that you noticed. And this party is, naturally, as wonderful as your other ones.”

“Oh?” the Viscount tilted his head slightly to the side. “Have you been to my previous balls? I cannot discern your face through your mask, my dear.”

“Certainly you don’t expect me to remove this mask without a dance first, my lord?” Elizabeth ran a finger over the edge of her mask and smiled coyly.

The Viscount smirked. “Sir,” he addressed Prince Soma. “Might I borrow this young lady for the next dance?”

“Be my guest, Viscount Druitt,” the prince bowed again, smiling as he turned to leave. He glanced back at Elizabeth, who winked at him through her mask.

Ciel scoffed. “A silly ball with people I hate and where Lizzy is dancing with a creepy man who I want to kill. Somehow this seems familiar.” he rolled his eyes at his own sarcasm. He was glaring at Elizabeth and the Viscount when he felt Sebastian’s hand on his shoulder.

“Young Master,” he whispered. “Your... er, well, demon shadow... it grows and billows when you become enraged,” he explained. “I need to teach you how to control it.” Sebastian sighed when Ciel just continued to stare at him. “Sir, do not worry. Lady Elizabeth is in no danger. She is surrounded by friends, family, demons, reapers, and whatever Matilda is. She will be perfectly safe at all times.”

The earl scoffed again and looked back at Elizabeth flirting with the Viscount. A moment later his eyes widened and he turned back to his butler. “Wait. You said whatever Matilda is. So you also get the feeling she is inhuman?”

“Yes sir,” the butler confirmed. “I cannot tell what she is... and I assume neither can you. But, she is here to help us, whatever she is. We will find out one day, young master. After all, you and I have all the time in the world now, even until the final curtain falls on this world.”

Ciel stared at the throng of dancing people. “They’ll all be dead one day,” he said, watching as Agni and Prince Soma clapped their hands and commanded everybody’s attention for their performance. “I’ve always known this, but it feels different knowing they will all die and you and I will live on. Well, and I suppose Undertaker and Matilda will live on, also.” he turned to Sebastian. “What do you think happens to shinigami when the world ends?”

“My theory would be that nothing happens to them, my lord, and that they continue with their work as before.” Seeing the earl’s confused expression, Sebastian smiled and raised one eyebrow. “Young Master, surely you aren’t so arrogant as to believe that there is only one world?”

The earl wanted to ask more, but he noticed Prince Soma’s very pointed looks at him and the head tilt towards Elizabeth and the viscount. Lizzy had one hand behind her back and one hand holding her fan in front of her mouth, looking coquettishly at Viscount Druitt. When he bowed to her and offered her his hand, she took it, giggling, and let him lead her outside into the gardens. Before walking out the door, she shot a look to Ciel and Soma that clearly meant Now.

Ciel and Sebastian looked at each other. “This is an order; make sure everyone is in place in the gardens for the next phase of the plan. Within the next few minutes, Viscount Druitt should be right where we want him.”

Sebastian smirked. Finally. He bowed with his hand over his heart. “Yes, my lord.”

~

Elizabeth had her hands full trying to keep the Viscount on the hook while avoiding his touch as much as she could. She flirtatiously waved her fan. “My lord, are you absolutely certain this is appropriate?” she giggled. “We mustn’t forget ourselves.”

“No danger in that, my little cardinal,” Viscount Druitt smiled down at her, and something in his smirk made Elizabeth squirm. “My my, you remind me so much of a lovely little robin I once knew. But there is no need to dwell on past loves tonight. For this night, though my mansion is full of people, we are all alone in this paradise. We are in Eden together, my cardinal, free to explore as Adam and Eve.”

They walked together during his pompous speech until they reached the fountain in the center of the garden. It was a strangely simple fountain for such a grand garden, with four herrings spraying water into a pool. As soon as they neared it, Elizabeth snickered to herself. “We’re not as alone as you think,” she said with a short laugh.

Suddenly she reached to her back and drew a sword which Paula had neatly hidden, pointing the tip directly under the viscount’s chin. “It’s time for your true reckoning, Aleistor Chamber!” Elizabeth declared, unmoved by the fear in Viscount Druitt’s face. Seemingly out of nowhere, Agni, Sebastian, Ran Mao, Matilda, and Mei Rin emerged like spirits from the bushes, wrapping long ropes around the viscount’s body and securing him tightly to the fountain. From all around, the rest of the party appeared from the hedges; Undertaker, Bard, Finny, Prince Soma, Lau, Paula, and Ciel. Elizabeth approached Viscount Druitt and traced the point of her sword over his jugular. Smirking, she removed her mask and tossed it into the fountain at his feet.

[estrellaxpolar-blog]

Marth finally gets a meta

The best lord needs to break into this brand new blog 👀

I’ve been holding onto this draft for a looooooong long time, and out of laziness or nervousness of the acceptance of some of my headcanons, I didn’t finish.

But then I remembered characters flow so much better when I can interpret them the way I want (*cough* Ephraim) so without further ado...

(Keep in mind a lot, and I mean, a LOT of these are headcanons of mine over the years. I know I’m not stating facts from the games, anime, or manga themselves. They will, however, be the default for how Marth is interpreted on this blog)

Enjoy this mess, I never format these professionally.

His social anxiety and insecurity

How can we not start out with this? It was one of the most obvious things for me about his personality from the start; that his insecurity with himself went past just being humble, going as far as to deny his own skills and accomplishments. He says things like this plenty of times in Fire Emblem Heroes alone.

“I have come to see my own powerlessness. As but one, I cannot accomplish anything.”

“I found victory only because I had first found so many allies who shared my new sense of justice.”

“I can accomplish nothing on my own. It’s thanks to my friends I’ve come as far as I have.”

He doesn’t feel strong at all, I’d even like to think he’d avoid using the Falchion itself at first just because he feels he isn’t worthy. He’s not at all the same kind of person his father was.

Aside of having low self esteem, he also lives with the idea that one mistake could cost a lot. Hell, he even blames himself for the deaths of his friends, feeling that if he’d done more, that alone would have changed the fates.

“If I’m not dependable, everyone else will suffer for it.”

For someone that thinks so little of their own strength, it’s a bit hypocritical to pin all of his bad accomplishments on himself alone. It punched me in the gut when I thought about it more, but he does not like himself.

Marth disliked his father

One of the reasons he thinks so little of himself is because it’s all he’s heard of his father growing up. (PATHETIC WEAKLING) King Cornelius wanted his only son to be the kind of King he was, and went out of his way to try and mold Marth into his ideals. It very obviously didn’t work, and for a multitude of reasons that will be covered throughout this whole meta.

For starters, Marth knew from a very young age that Cornelius wasn’t the best example of a man. Marth and Elice’s mother was the Queen and his first wife, but Cornelius likely had many concubines as well, something common among Kings who prided themselves in their sheer strength and power. This raised even more tension growing up, watching the mothers of Marth’s half siblings pitting their children against each other, a lot like the how siblings in the Fates games were. Marth didn’t look up to his father from the very beginning because of this, and when worse examples followed, Marth frowned at the very idea of being a King someday. He was taught that they needed to kill, to come out on top and show no mercy or weakness.

Unfortunately, mercy and gentleness were something Marth had a lot of. Cornelius tried to break him out of it, but Marth didn’t even like to fake brutishness to get out from under the harsh thumb of his father. He wasn’t the kind of boy King Cornelius wanted him to be in the slightest, and Marth knew he wasn’t a boy at all.

Marth wants to transition

Marth’s self esteem hangs on a loose thread because he is dysphoric. And because he was the only son of a strict King, he had no freedom at all to be the woman he feels and sees he is.

His sister thankfully noticed this in him at a young age. She didn’t understand it completely, but she would sneak him in to little tea parties when they were small and let him wear her doll dresses. Marth looks up to his sister more than anyone else he’s known, guiltily admitting he’d rather be her. He grew so fond of wearing her crown even after she was rescued, and he was glad she let him keep it. It was subtle, but it at least let him feel a bit prettier.

None of them dared tell their father while he was still alive, yet even after he died and Marth assumed the throne of Altea, he still remained closeted, thinking that his transition would be selfish. He convinces himself he’s just being crazy, and the older he gets, the more he has to bury the idea of his true identity.

He’s not innocent to the core

Despite everything that he feels he lacks, he’s not weak willed in the slightest.

After his home country was taken and he was the sole survivor from defeat or capture in his family, he was furious. He wanted to take revenge for his country, abandoning some of his ideals to train vigorously even when that meant he would bulk up a little despite wanting to keep his slender figure.

“I, too, have seen losses, so I can empathize. After fleeing to safety, I swore to restore my homeland with the help of my comrades. It was Nyna who entrusted me with the Fire Emblem…and it strengthened my resolve to fight on. I no longer fought for vengeance… I fought for the people.”

It doesn’t last long, but after all of those years in exile, growing up around soldiers, he picked up a bit of dirty humor. Imagine getting “the talk” from the biggest block head in the military. Ceada was in the same boat (I like to thing growing up dirt mouthing with soldiers is why she’s so unfazed in this Niles support) and the two would constantly joke whenever they weren’t under the watchful eyes of nobles. Marth is later like this with his close friends, like Merric or Kris, as surprising as it is considering usually his calm and delicate way of speaking.

Marth’s noble actions and words are more or less a front, covering up a child that never got to be a child. He’s playful, albeit awkward around new faces, and doesn’t see himself growing out of that anytime soon. He never got to be a child when he was growing up, save for those few precious moments with his sister Elice, and enjoys spending quality time being an absolute dipshit any time he can to this day.

Marth is a fucking yandere

Not to say he’s the level of insane that Tharja is, or a stalker to a love interest, but he can lose his mind when someone he cares about is in danger.

He’s very critical of the lives of those close to him, as evidenced in some more heroes quotes:

“I cannot allow a single one of my friends to die. Together, you and I, with everyone else, will win this war.”

“I don’t want anyone to die. Surely you feel the same way.”

“As a friend, you are irreplaceable. I will protect you”

His sister also stresses to the Avatar in fe14 that Marth can’t let go of the deaths that occurred in the war of shadows, and knows he will do the same in the upcoming wars. She berates this kind of behavior, admitting he will always be childlike in his values because he believes he could save everyone.

And if you all know me, you know I’m going to take this hot piece of info and run with it.

Going back in time and raising the dead aren’t things that he’d say no to when I came to reviving loved ones. And we know how “well” that can turn out in fire emblem........

Without proper help and support, he could go batshit insane with the torment a friend in danger could bring.

Marth’s half siblings

Speaking of going insane with the death of loved ones, I’ve pictured the stakes being higher when Altea was taken. His entire family aside of Elice was killed, and that includes his half siblings.

While he had a distaste in the idea concubines, it doesn’t mean he didn’t grow fond of a few, espera their kids around his age. They were still family to him, save for the ones with power hungry mothers who would rather see he and Elice dead in order to give their kids a chance to the throne.

None ever dared plot an assasination on the King’s heavily monitored legitament children, but there were incidences between the ones of concubines that were highly favored. This would shake both Marth’s and Elice’s peace while growing up, breaking them inside entirely when they were all picked off during the siege of Altea.

[yortalnahtanoj]

John 11:25

25Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life; the one who believes in Me will live, even if he dies, 26and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?” 27She *said to Him, “Yes, Lord; I have come to believe that You are the [i]Christ, the Son of God, and [j]He who comes into the world.”

28When she had said this, she left and called Mary her sister, saying secretly, “The Teacher is here and is calling for you.” 29And when she heard this, she *got up quickly and came to Him.

30Now Jesus had not yet come into the village, but was still at the place where Martha met Him. 31Then the Jews who were with her in the house and were consoling her, when they saw that Mary had gotten up quickly and left, they followed her, thinking that she was going to the tomb to weep there. 32So when Mary came to the place where Jesus was, she saw Him and fell at His feet, saying to Him, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.” 33Therefore when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her also weeping, He was deeply moved in spirit and [k]was troubled, 34and He said, “Where have you laid him?” They *said to Him, “Lord, come and see.” 35Jesus wept. 36So the Jews were saying, “See how He loved him!” 37But some of them said, “Could this man, who opened the eyes of the man who was blind, not have also [l]kept this man from dying?”

38So Jesus, again being deeply moved within, *came to the tomb. Now it was a cave, and a stone was lying against it. 39Jesus *said, “Remove the stone.” Martha, the sister of the deceased, *said to Him, “Lord, by this time [m]there will be a stench, for he has been dead four days.” 40Jesus *said to her, “Did I not say to you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?” 41So they removed the stone. And Jesus raised His eyes, and said, “Father, I thank You that You have heard Me. 42But I knew that You always hear Me; nevertheless, because of the [n]people standing around I said it, so that they may believe that You sent Me.” 43And when He had said these things, He cried out with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” 44Out came the man who had died, bound hand and foot with wrappings, and his face was wrapped around with a cloth. Jesus *said to them, “Unbind him, and let him go.”

45Therefore many of the Jews who came to Mary, and saw what He had done, believed in Him. 46But some of them went to the Pharisees and told them the things which Jesus had done.

Conspiracy to Kill Jesus

47Therefore the chief priests and the Pharisees convened a council meeting, and they were saying, “What are we [o]doing in regard to the fact that this man is performing many [p]signs? 48If we let Him go on like this, all the people will believe in Him, and the Romans will come and take over both our [q]place and our nation.” 49But one of them, Caiaphas, who was high priest that year, said to them, “You know nothing at all, 50nor are you taking into account that it is in your best interest that one man die for the people, and that the whole nation not perish instead.” 51Now he did not say this [r]on his own, but as he was high priest that year, he prophesied that Jesus was going to die for the nation; 52and not for the nation only, but in order that He might also gather together into one the children of God who are scattered abroad. 53So from that day on they planned together to kill Him.

54Therefore Jesus no longer continued to walk publicly among the Jews, but went away from there to the region near the wilderness, into a city called Ephraim; and there He stayed with the disciples.

55Now the Passover of the Jews was near, and many went up to Jerusalem from the country prior to the Passover, in order to [s]purify themselves. 56So they were looking for Jesus, and saying to one another as they stood in the temple area, “What do you think; that He will not come to the feast at all?” 57Now the chief priests and the Pharisees had given orders that if anyone knew where He was, he was to report it, so that they might arrest Him.

[darrowsrising]

Villans

#astrearants #kinda

Trigger warning for strong language (you’d think that a law student would write a rant without foul language, but really, if it doesn’t provoke some thoughts it isn’t honest)

Look, don’t get me wrong. I love The Joker and his ‘do it because it’s funny’ way of thinking. But the fact is, not many villans can pull that off. That’s why The Joker wanna-bes are boring, lack substance and are overused.

Pierce Brown writes really amazing “villans”. I put it between quotes (or whatever this “ is called), because the world isn’t split between the bad guys and the good guys.

Octavia au Lune ruled like her father before her and his father before him. She burned Rhea to mentain control over her Empire. She brainwashed Reds into believing that The Sons of Ares are destroying Earth and they have to terraform the Planets as quickly as possible, while treating them as slaves. Under her rule, like others before hers, the Board of Quality Control destroyed life after life without a care, Violets were pumped full of drugs in circuses, Pinks were used and abused and sterillized, Obsidians were gladiators who killed for Gold entertainment if they escaped the ice. Even Golds were made to kill each other at the Institute. You read Red Rising, you know the story. She even killed her own daughter and her husband so she made sure they never tried to overthrow her. But Octavia loved her grandson. And her Furies. She loved Luna and would have gave her throne to Adrius to save it from nuclear war. Octavia believed that all that she does must be done. There is the only way to live in peace. It’s a fucked up philosophy, but she nuked Rhea so the civil war won’t start. One moon against an entire galaxy. The choice was tough, but clear in my books.

Roque was never really loved by his family. He wasn’t powerful like Darrow or Tactus or Cassius. His skills were more of the strategic sort. He was an artist at war and outside of it. He loved too deeply, too easily. A person’s loyalties are as follows: themselves, their family, their Color, The Sovereign, The Society. (Also the last three can be morphed into one easily under Octavia’s rule). Although Roque was loved by his friends, he sold them out, because he couldn’t accept Darrow’s views. For him, Octavia’s views were all he knew. It was right. Gold was made to rule. His loved ones died because of Darrow’s beliefs, so they were wrong. He killed himself at the end as any Gold would do in his place. Better die than lose. He was a Gold until the very end. But he wasn’t evil. He simply believed in the wrong things.

Adrius au Augustus was the result of perpetual abuse from his father combined with the lack of love he felt due to isolation and childhood trauma caused by his mother’s death. Mustang would have been like that if she hadn’t had the Telemanuses. They saved her from herself in a way/ They showered her with love and understanding and told her stories about heroes who protected the weak. Adrius lived in Claudius’s shadow. His father didn’t love him because he wasn’t Claudius. So he killed him so Nero would have no choice, but to love him. Didn’t work. He tried to win the Institute by all means so his father would be proud. Didn’t work. He tried anything to gain the title of Nero au Augustus’s heir and son. Even killed the potential candidates (Leto). Didn’t work. The last drop was Nero loving a Red as his own blood. He killed him, beause if he can’t have Nero’s love, no one will have it, especially a Red. If people won’t love him, they shall fear him.

The Ash Lord, Julia au Bellona, the Rath-Valii, the Falthe and all their allies . They all believe that Gold must rule, not shepard.  And it is a way of thinking. Wrong if you ask me.

In Iron Gold we see diffrent points of view that now shape the Republic. Darrow is tired. Can’t stand the war, the commands of his 'superiors’ who sit their bums in a chair and scream bloody murder without actually doing something. He wants to live in peace, but no one lets him, not even his conciousness. He has to honor his duty, but people are dying at the hands of the Syndicate, the Red Hand, radiation, famine, so on and so forth. And really, I understand people’s frustrations with Darrow, but if you really believe that Magnus au Grimmus and Julia au Bellona really want peace with the Republic, you need to re-read Red Rising. They believe in Gold must rule, everyone must obey, but on Octavia’s level, which means slavary, bloodshed, corruption etc. Do you really think Julia would forsake her revenge for peace? Do you think Magnus would forgive the death of his daughters? Aja was massacrated, Moira was carbonized. Dancer can’t forgive Golds and wants 10 Reds in the Senate for every Gold, but he wants to make peace with the Ass Lord. The irony doesn’t escape me.

Back on track. Lyria is a Gamma. Of course she feels it was better in the mines. Her people always won the LaurelTide. But no one deserves to be forsaken in a refugee camp, their family massacrated, their hopes crushed. And Lambda are bitches at this point. Her fury is perfectly understandable. Her experience shows us how in theters The Republic really is.

In Ephraim’s case, though, I can only say that grief doesn’t give a flying fuck about how many years have been. But his grief doesn’t justify wanting all the Golds, the Whites, the Coppers dead. It won’t bring Trigg back, it would destabilize the society and it will provoke fear. If there is something salvageable in him, I’d say that he isn’t really a bad man. He makes the wrong choices.

 Imagine if Darrow never let go of his grief for Eo. If he never fell in love again (against all odds no less), if he never met Sevro or Fitchner or any of his friends? He would either have been like Ephraim, either he would have been like Titus.

Lysander on the other hand isn’t exactly bad or evil either. He walks a fine line between what has been and what it is now. He can’t find his place in this new world the Reaper helped build and he can’t let go of the world he grew up in. The thing is Octavia killed his parents (Lorn believed they were killed because her daughter wanted her head. History repeats itself if you let it.) But the way Octavia raised him shaped him. Cassius was a guiding hand, but at his core Lysander was raised to be Peerless Scarred. To him, Mustang is an Usurper, The Empire was better than The Republic, Cassius betrayed his Sovereign. But he isn’t like Octavia. He is more like Romulus. Romulus and the Moon Lords believe in Iron Golds. They prefer the stoicism, unlike the Core who became infested with Pixies because of decadence. They all raise Peerless Scarreds and they are Peerless Scarreds. They train to be like that, beause it’s the highest honor for their Color, unless you are Iron Gold, which is doubtful, because that is practically God Level. The thing is these guys do everything with mesure. They eat only 80% of the food on the plate to show that they liked the food, but it didn’t overwhelm their senses, they have no servants or holoCan or holoNet until they are old enough to earn them. They don’t treat their servants in an excesivily bad manner, unless necessary, because as Octavia might have found out at some point, there is only so much you can take from people until they have nothing to lose and then they will turn against you.

The thing is Lorn saw Darrow as his son. And we might think that Lorn would have never accepted Darrow if he found out the truth. But Lorn has surprised us now and then. When he admitted that he should have let Tactus alive, because he would have become a better man for Darrow. Darrow is much more than Lorn could have ever guessed. He has seen a lot in a 100 years, but Darrow's power of getting people together and leading them with love was beyond his experience. I think Lorn would have at least understood Darrow.

Getting back on track, Lysander’s lack of parents shows. He makes idols and role models out of the people because he can’t figure out life on his own. And although Romulus’s phylosophy (even Darrow and Mustang liked some of it) is way better than Octavia’s, I think the little dude will find out on his own skin how life is really like. And it’s nothing Iron Golden about it.

Magnus au Grimmus and Julia au Bellona have their reasons to do what they do. They are both personal and duty bound. They lost their families, so their principles are all that is left. Gold shall rule upon all at whatever cost.

Pierce Brown’s world isn’t black and white. It complex and multi-dimesional. You can’t just hate with every fiber of your being, because in the end people aren’t either good or evil. It’s about perspective. In some eyes Darrow, Sevro, Mustang and the others are the villans who destroyed people’s lives. But that’s the beauty of this author’s works.

Ok, end of rant.

[mikaltom53]

Now a certain man was sick, Lazarus of Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. It was the Mary who anointed the Lord with ointment, and wiped His feet with her hair, whose brother Lazarus was sick. So the sisters sent word to Him, saying, “Lord, behold, he whom You love is sick.” But when Jesus heard this, He said, “This sickness is not to end in death, but for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified by it.” Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So when He heard that he was sick, He then stayed two days longer in the place where He was. Then after this He said to the disciples, “Let us go to Judea again.” The disciples said to Him, “Rabbi, the Jews were just now seeking to stone You, and are You going there again?” Jesus answered, “Are there not twelve hours in the day? If anyone walks in the day, he does not stumble, because he sees the light of this world. But if anyone walks in the night, he stumbles, because the light is not in him.” This He said, and after that He said to them, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I go, so that I may awaken him out of sleep.” The disciples then said to Him, “Lord, if he has fallen asleep, he will recover.” Now Jesus had spoken of his death, but they thought that He was speaking of literal sleep. So Jesus then said to them plainly, “Lazarus is dead, and I am glad for your sakes that I was not there, so that you may believe; but let us go to him.” Therefore Thomas, who is called Didymus, said to his fellow disciples, “Let us also go, so that we may die with Him.” So when Jesus came, He found that he had already been in the tomb four days. Now Bethany was near Jerusalem, about two miles off; and many of the Jews had come to Martha and Mary, to console them concerning their brother. Martha therefore, when she heard that Jesus was coming, went to meet Him, but Mary stayed at the house. Martha then said to Jesus, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died. Even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give You.” Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” Martha said to Him, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day.” Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?” She said to Him, “Yes, Lord; I have believed that You are the Christ, the Son of God, even He who comes into the world.” When she had said this, she went away and called Mary her sister, saying secretly, “The Teacher is here and is calling for you.” And when she heard it, she got up quickly and was coming to Him. Now Jesus had not yet come into the village, but was still in the place where Martha met Him. Then the Jews who were with her in the house, and consoling her, when they saw that Mary got up quickly and went out, they followed her, supposing that she was going to the tomb to weep there. Therefore, when Mary came where Jesus was, she saw Him, and fell at His feet, saying to Him, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.” When Jesus therefore saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her also weeping, He was deeply moved in spirit and was troubled, and said, “Where have you laid him?” They said to Him, “Lord, come and see.”

— John 11:1-34

So the Jews were saying, “See how He loved him!” But some of them said, “Could not this man, who opened the eyes of the blind man, have kept this man also from dying?” So Jesus, again being deeply moved within, came to the tomb. Now it was a cave, and a stone was lying against it. Jesus said, “Remove the stone.” Martha, the sister of the deceased, said to Him, “Lord, by this time there will be a stench, for he has been dead four days.” Jesus said to her, “Did I not say to you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?” So they removed the stone. Then Jesus raised His eyes, and said, “Father, I thank You that You have heard Me. I knew that You always hear Me; but because of the people standing around I said it, so that they may believe that You sent Me.” When He had said these things, He cried out with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come forth.” The man who had died came forth, bound hand and foot with wrappings, and his face was wrapped around with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Unbind him, and let him go.” Therefore many of the Jews who came to Mary, and saw what He had done, believed in Him. But some of them went to the Pharisees and told them the things which Jesus had done. Therefore the chief priests and the Pharisees convened a council, and were saying, “What are we doing? For this man is performing many signs. If we let Him go on like this, all men will believe in Him, and the Romans will come and take away both our place and our nation.” But one of them, Caiaphas, who was high priest that year, said to them, “You know nothing at all, nor do you take into account that it is expedient for you that one man die for the people, and that the whole nation not perish.” Now he did not say this on his own initiative, but being high priest that year, he prophesied that Jesus was going to die for the nation, and not for the nation only, but in order that He might also gather together into one the children of God who are scattered abroad. So from that day on they planned together to kill Him. Therefore Jesus no longer continued to walk publicly among the Jews, but went away from there to the country near the wilderness, into a city called Ephraim; and there He stayed with the disciples. Now the Passover of the Jews was near, and many went up to Jerusalem out of the country before the Passover to purify themselves. So they were seeking for Jesus, and were saying to one another as they stood in the temple, “What do you think; that He will not come to the feast at all?” Now the chief priests and the Pharisees had given orders that if anyone knew where He was, he was to report it, so that they might seize Him.

— John 11:36-57

[syxsol-blog]

hey guys. not so happy annoucement this time, but bear with me

I have health issues that i need to focus on for now, so ive decided to leave the directory (a wandering ghost of a character around the ship doesn’t really help development of the directory you know??). i know it seems really sudden, but i wouldn’t leave like this if it wasnt really important for me to. I love everyone here, i love the story line, and i love watching everyone create these super detailed characters to drive along the plot.

however, im a pretty sappy person, so ive decided to write some personal goodbyes. some of you i didnt get to speak with on as regular of a basis, but i still read your stuff on dash and appreciated you creating a story and experiecing that passion second hand. without further hesitation...

@sysidereus​ you’re married to multiple people but i GUESS that’s fine. as long as im the number one wife, it’s okay. ;) I love talking to you, even if it’s unrelated to the directory or just random shit about tv shows like jane the virgin (i still wanna make that meme board including the entire crew of serenity). we vibe well, and you’re an incredible writer. sid has always been one of my favorite muses here, and the one thing i regret-- TWO things i regret are not being able to talk you as much, and not being able to see sol and sid become best friends but sorta gay. like naruto and sasuke. honestly i adore you, and i hope i see you around again.

@syxephraim​ babe babe babe Bae. I know you’ve been worrying about my disappearance acts for a while, but ill say it a hundred times over. you’re one of the best rp partners ive ever had. no contest, really. you’re incredibly sweet and wonderful, too. the plot between eph and sol is one of my favorite plots ive ever had, and I’ve had a LOT of plots, trust me. there’s nothing quite like finding a writer like you who i can trade headcanons back and forth so seamlessly until it becomes this story that’s bigger than i ever imagined. there is not one moment i regret logging in to send you a message, even just a quick one before i fell off the earth. i wish i had more time to develop the relationship between sol and ephraim. spoiler for you: Sol is in love with ephraim, and he has been since he left persephone. He loves that boy down to his core, and there’s no changng that. I hope to return one day so I can write with you again. You’re loved, angel. Don’t doubt that.  

@kamorasy​ what’s funny is our characters always end up in brother/sister roles together. you have me on twitter, too, so we won’t lose contact, but you still get a sweet message from me because *clenches fists meme* I just love you that much. we knew each other from vanta black, too. and girl... your characters are like discovering treasure. so complex, well thought out, and experately played. we’re always able to headcanon w each other (altho for some reason we can never quite actually rp). but i never have a problem writing with you. it runs like clockwork. take care of yourself, okay? & if you ever need someone to drive away a strange man that hits on you, call me up

@syjaewon​ Queen Bee. you’ve been really understanding with everything and i can’t even say how much i appreciate that. like... wow. two directories we’ve known each other, and in each one, im awed by you. jaewon is an unforgettable muse, he really is, and you’re unforgettable mun, you really are. you’ve built an amazing place for people to come to and feel safe to express and write stories together. in all my rp years, ive only seen that a few times. thank you for letting me be a part of serenity, and you know where to find me if you ever need me. <3

@syxhenry​ Hi, doll. sorry that goodbyes have come down to this long ass message full of sap. i still think it’s hilarious that you were in kingsman & i didnt realize that till much later. there’s something very special about your characters. they’re all so well done, and the way you write them makes you want to keep reading everything about them. i’m lucky that i did get to write with you in not one, but two different places. henry and sol’s relationship didn’t develop quite as far as i would have loved to see them go, but there’s always more opportnities. i loved talking to you about characters, and plotting out the bizarre admiration sol has for henry. and i will always probably ship henry/noi. can you blame me?

@syaudrey​ im crying in the club right now because i have to say goodbye to one of the muns of a kickass engineering lady. you make me happy bc of how you are as a person, and the fact you’re writing about characters people don’t normally write about. can i just say how much i love the fact that audrey is asexual and amazing and complex and hilariously prickly all in one? sol and audrey are so funny bc all sol wants is to be friends with her, and she finds his bubbly attitude suspicious. i wish we’d gotten to rp that relationship to completion. we only started talking more frequently for a little bit, but omg i wish id had more time to chat with you. you’re so great and so is your muse. i only wish you the best, babe.

@sysullivan​ i only hope you can forgive me... maybe if i get on my knees. we had a lot of plans, and im sad we didnt get to write them out together. maybe some day, right? you’re one of the first people i talked to a LOT here, and i just want to thank you for humoring me, especially when i would send you the most ridiculous ideas or thoughts about things. also, i was the one that sent that secret admirer message that one time. ;))))) sol’s little crush on sullivan was really fun for me to write out, even if i only got to for a short time. what i like about you the most as a writer is how much thought and detail you put into your characters. absolutely blows my mind, honestly it does. i hope you never stop writing that way. you’re brilliant. thank you for sticking with me

@syxyihan​ you NEVER fail to make me smile, it’s incredible. plus writing with you is always really fun-- i had the most fun writing with you because you’re not afraid to be silly or a little ridiculous. i love both versions of your muse with all my heart, and i enjoyed every second i did get to speak with you. you’re in the wind now, like i am, but i still hope you see this. your creations are some of my favorite to see, and i really hope you keep writing. there’s a particular quality about your writing that makes you want to keep reading and reading and reading, and you’re sad when you reach the end of it because you want to see more. i loved the relationships between our characters even if they were short lived... and for the love of god i need real closure with yihan and henry. im crying. BUT. ill just write fanfic for them instead. LMAOO. your writing is gorgeous, it really is. best of luck to you <3 thank you

@syxmina​ mina is my kick ass cool aunt :( you’re one of the first people i interacted with... and their dynamic is sol being the annoying little kid who almost gets killed by mina all the time. yet, i love that. she never really killed him and deep down i like to think she still sort of... tolerates him in a positive way. i love mina will all of my sol (LMAO LET ME BE LAME). the way you play her is great to see. i hope you keep writing, and continue to spread your creativity. it’s worth wtinessing every time

@syxsonmi​ WE NEVER GOT tooooo WRITE. i’ll always remember you becuase you plotted that super cool, super dark plot with me right from the start. it takes a certain person to go crazy with that subject material right along with me, BUT YOU STILL DID AND I ADORE YOU FOR IT. you’re also a dreamcatcher fan and i gotta protect my fellow dreamcatcher friends. siyeon is my wife and ill worship her until i die but i digress. i love sonmi, and im sad we never got to write out that super cool plot. i only hope you can forgive me for disappearing on you. i loved watching sonmi develop beyond her trauma. you write her well, and this rp wouldnt be the same without you

@sybyul​ you thought i wouldn’t mention you, didn’t you? Well, think again. we didn’t get to writing that super awesome dynamic between our characters, but it’ll live on in my head and ill always remember you fondly. 1) you’re a really talented writer. 2) you’re really funny lmao afFALSKJKl. i wish i had more time with you, but maybe ill come back, or maybe we’ll run into each other again in a different directory. your writing is gorgeous, i never get tired of reading your application ( i think ive read it at least five times ). no lie. sorry that we have to part ways like this, but i really did enjoy being around you. remember to watch ice spiders or dragon wars & hate me for bringing that into your life. <3

at @ everyone else.

you make this place unforgettable, you really do. ive been here for a while, although i have been a ghost, i still logged in to keep up with the activity and the development of everyone’s characters. i don’t regret one moment or one second i spent here. one reason i didn’t write a solo of sol leaving is because i hope to return, i really do. but for now

you’re all talented, and I enjoyed watching all of you be so creative and passionate about this place. i love all of you. and since ive already been sappy, ill be a little even more sappy. remember to be kind to people, take care of yourselves, and keep writing.

see you, space cowboy

<3

[dfroza]

A set of ancient Letters

that John was instructed to write down to be conserved.

Today’s reading from the Scriptures in the New Testament is chapter #2 of the book of Revelation:

[Letter to Ephesus]

The One: Write down My words, and send them to the messenger of the church in Ephesus. “These are the words of the One who holds the seven stars in His right hand, the One who walks and moves among the golden lampstands:

“I know your deeds, your tireless labor, and your patient endurance. I know you do not tolerate those who do evil. Furthermore, you have diligently tested those who claim to be emissaries, and you have found that they are not true witnesses. You have correctly found them to be false. I know you are patiently enduring and holding firm on behalf of My name. You have not become faint.

“However, I have this against you: you have abandoned your first love. Do you remember what it was like before you fell? It’s time to rethink and change your ways; go back to how you first acted. However, if you do not return, I will come quickly and personally remove your lampstand from its place. But you do have this to your credit: you despise the deeds of the Nicolaitans and how they concede to evil. I also hate what they do.

“Let the person who is able to hear, listen to and follow what the Spirit proclaims to all the churches. I will allow the one who conquers through faithfulness even unto death to eat from the tree of life found in God’s lush paradise.”

[Letter to Smyrna]

Write down My words, and send them to the messenger of the church in Smyrna. “These are the words of the First and the Last, the One who was dead and returned to life:

“I know [your deeds and] the difficult ordeal you are enduring and your poverty, although you are actually rich. I am aware of the offensive accusations preached by those who call themselves ‘Jews.’ But these people are not the Jews they pretend to be; they are actually the congregation of Satan. In the face of suffering, do not fear. Watch; the devil will throw some of you into prison shortly so that you might be tested, and you will endure great affliction for 10 days. Be faithful throughout your life, until the day you die, and I will give you the victor’s wreath of life.

“Let the person who is able to hear, listen to and follow what the Spirit proclaims to all the churches. The one who conquers through faithfulness even unto death will escape the second death.”

[Letter to Pergamum]

Write down My words, and send them to the messenger of the church in Pergamum. “These are the words of the One with the sharp double-edged sword:

“I know [your deeds and] where you live. It is where Satan, the adversary, has established his throne. You have stayed true to My name, and you did not deny your trust in Me even in the eventful days of My faithful witness, Antipas. He was killed among you in that place where Satan dwells.

“However, I have a few matters against you: some who live among you hold to the teaching of Balaam, who instructed Balak to set up a stumbling block before the people of Israel. As a result, some among you are eating food prepared for idol worship and committing immoral sexual acts. You have others who are holding firm to the teaching of the Nicolaitans. Therefore, change your ways and turn to Me. If you do not, I will quickly come to where you live and will battle them with the sword of My mouth.

“Let the person who is able to hear, listen to and follow what the Spirit proclaims to all the churches. To the one who conquers through faithfulness even unto death, I will feed you with hidden manna and give you a white stone. Upon this stone, a new name is engraved. No one knows this name except for its recipient.”

[Letter to Thyatira]

Write down My words, and send them to the messenger of the church in Thyatira. “These are the words of the Son of God, the One whose eyes blaze like flames of fire and whose feet gleam like brightly polished bronze:

“I know your deeds, love, faithfulness, service, and endurance. Your labors greatly increase in quality as you travel along this journey.

“However, I have this against you: you have tolerated that woman Jezebel, who is a self-anointed prophetess and who misleads My followers to commit immoral sexual acts and to eat food prepared for idol worship. I have provided her enough time to turn away from her indecency, but she refuses to turn from these immoral acts. Watch; I will throw her back into her sickbed with those who committed adultery with her, and I will make them a bed of great affliction if they do not abandon her indiscretions and turn to follow Me. I will punish her by striking her children dead. Through this all the churches will know I am the One who relentlessly explores the mind and heart, and I will deal with each of you as you deserve according to your acts.

“I say to the rest of you in Thyatira, those who have not held to the teachings of Jezebel and who remain ignorant of the real meaning of what is called the deep things of Satan, I will not burden you with anything more. 25 Just keep on task, and keep the faith until I return.

“And as for those who conquer through faithfulness even unto death and continue to labor with Me until the close of the final curtain,

I will give them authority over the nations.

And they will rule the nations with an iron scepter,

as fragile clay jars are shattered to pieces.

As I received this authority from My Father, I will bestow the morning star to the victor.

“Let the person who is able to hear, listen to and follow what the Spirit proclaims to all the churches.”

The Book of Revelation, Chapter 2 (The Voice)

Today’s paired chapter of the Testaments is the 13th chapter of 2nd Chronicles that documents the life & times of King Abijah of Judah in the midst of the split kingdoms of Israel:

[King Abijah]

In the eighteenth year of the rule of King Jeroboam, Abijah took over the throne of Judah. He ruled in Jerusalem three years. His mother was Maacah daughter of Uriel of Gibeah.

War broke out between Abijah and Jeroboam. Abijah started out with 400,000 of his best soldiers; Jeroboam countered with 800,000 of his best.

Abijah took a prominent position on Mount Zemaraim in the hill country of Ephraim and gave this speech: “Listen, Jeroboam and all Israel! Don’t you realize that God, the one and only God of Israel, established David and his sons as the permanent rulers of Israel, ratified by a ‘covenant of salt’—God’s kingdom ruled by God’s king? And what happened? Jeroboam, the son of Solomon’s slave Nebat, rebelled against his master. All the riffraff joined his cause and were too much for Rehoboam, Solomon’s true heir. Rehoboam didn’t know his way around—besides he was a real wimp; he couldn’t stand up against them.

“Taking advantage of that weakness, you are asserting yourself against the very rule of God that is delegated to David’s descendants—you think you are so big with your huge army backed up by the golden-calf idols that Jeroboam made for you as gods! But just look at what you’ve done—you threw out the priests of God, the sons of Aaron, and the Levites, and made priests to suit yourselves, priests just like the pagans have. Anyone who shows up with enough money to pay for it can be a priest! A priest of No-God!

“But for the rest of us in Judah, we’re sticking with God. We have not traded him in for the latest model—we’re keeping the tried-and-true priests of Aaron to lead us to God and the Levites to lead us in worship by sacrificing Whole-Burnt-Offerings and aromatic incense to God at the daily morning and evening prayers, setting out fresh holy bread on a clean table, and lighting the lamps on the golden Lampstand every night. We continue doing what God told us to in the way he told us to do it; but you have rid yourselves of him.

“Can’t you see the obvious? God is on our side; he’s our leader. And his priests with trumpets are all ready to blow the signal to battle. O Israel—don’t fight against God, the God of your ancestors. You will not win this battle.”

While Abijah was speaking, Jeroboam had sent men around to take them by surprise from the rear: Jeroboam in front of Judah and the ambush behind. When Judah looked back, they saw they were attacked front and back. They prayed desperately to God, the priests blew their trumpets, and the soldiers of Judah shouted their battle cry. At the battle cry, God routed Jeroboam and all Israel before Abijah and Judah. The army of Israel scattered before Judah; God gave them the victory. Abijah and his troops slaughtered them—500,000 of Israel’s best fighters were killed that day. The army of Israel fell flat on its face—a humiliating defeat. The army of Judah won hands down because they trusted God, the God of their ancestors.

Abijah followed up his victory by pursuing Jeroboam, taking the towns of Bethel, Jeshanah, and Ephron with their surrounding villages. Jeroboam never did recover from his defeat while Abijah lived. Later on God struck him down and he died. Meanwhile Abijah flourished; he married fourteen wives and ended up with a family of twenty-two sons and sixteen daughters.

The rest of the history of Abijah, what he did and said, is written in the study written by Iddo the prophet.

The Book of 2nd Chronicles, Chapter 13 (The Message)

my personal reading of the Scriptures for Wednesday, february 10 of 2021 with a paired chapter from each Testament of the Bible, along with Today’s Psalms and Proverbs

A post by John Parsons that looks at the 8th (and 3rd) commandment:

The eighth commandment against stealing (לא תגנב, Exod. 20:15) corresponds to the third commandment not to profane God's name. Stealing, in the sense of the Hebrew word ganav (גנב), refers to both the act of carrying off by stealth that which is not one's own (i.e., theft), but also to the deceptive inner disposition that accompanies the action. And ultimately that deceptive inner disposition is a form of self-deception. After all, none of us categorically "owns" anything, since God alone is the Creator and Giver of all of life. Stealing arrogantly (and vainly) attempts to seize some "thing" and to claim it for oneself - blindly disregarding the fact that "in Him we live and move and have our being" (Acts 17:28). [Hebrew for Christians]

https://hebrew4christians.com/

2.9.21 • Facebook

Today’s message from the Institute for Creation Research

February 10, 2021

According to the Word

“Let my cry come near before thee, O LORD: give me understanding according to thy word.” (Psalm 119:169)

The closing 22nd stanza of Psalm 119 repeats many of the themes of the previous 21 and summarizes this epic to the majesty of the Word of God.

Seven passages contain prayer for “understanding,” which depends on the gracious ministry of the Holy Spirit in our hearts and minds (John 14:26). Our finite minds cannot understand God’s eternal truths apart from revelation and the “mind of Christ” granted at salvation (1 Corinthians 2:16).

Thirteen passages use “according to thy word.” Nothing that we can do pleases God more than our efforts to “magnify” His Word in our lives and ministries (Psalm 138:2). Every sentient creature will be judged by what is “written in the books, according to their works” (Revelation 20:12).

Eight stanzas include the prayer to have God “teach.” Again, apart from the Holy Spirit in our “new creature” (2 Corinthians 5:17), we would be empty of both understanding and wisdom. Through reading and meditating on God’s Word after salvation, we grow effective and gain maturity.

The writer also promised in eight stanzas to “not forget.” Our minds need to become stabilized with memorized Scripture and our hearts ready and sanctified with the stored Word of God so that we can “give an answer” both to those who ask us (1 Peter 3:15) and when we need guidance for our own life decisions (Colossians 1:10).

The psalm ends with a prayer for all: “Let thine hand help me; for I have chosen thy precepts. I have longed for thy salvation, O LORD; and thy law is my delight. Let my soul live, and it shall praise thee; and let thy judgments help me. I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek thy servant; for I do not forget thy commandments” (Psalm 119:173-176). HMM III

[four-loose-screws]

FE8 Novelization Translation - Chapter 5, Section 2

FE8 Novelization Translation - Chapter 5, Section 1

If you would like to start from the beginning, read a missed part, etc., click here!

FE Game Script Translations - FE Novel Translations - Original FE Support Conversations

If you are interested in donating to support my work, please check out my Ko-fi here. Thank you!

———————————

I call this a “section” because it is not a separate part of the chapter in the book, but divided from the rest of the chapter by a scene break.

———————————

Chapter 5: Fog of War (con’t)

The moment Eirika's army left Serafew, they were already in Grado territory.

They continued on even more carefully before, avoiding all major roads and traveling around the outskirts of every town they neared. The supplies and food they'd prepared was more than enough for their journey, but without even a moment to rest their tired minds, their anxiety only multiplied. 

Still, Eirika had determination to spare. Each step brought her a little closer to her brother.

Her ever growing group of allies also helped to ease the pain in her weary heart. The mage Lute, strange as she was, indeed had the skills to back up her claims that she was a prodigy. And not only that, she was also knowledgeable about plants and animals, and knew the names of many of the weeds growing alongside the road. Whenever they were marching and one of the young soldiers found a rare plant, she would give its name and medicinal properties in the spot, gaining the fascination of those around her.

Her friend, the monk Artur, was quiet and did not stand out, but studied fervently. Almost all of the items in the heavy bag he carried on his back were books. Whenever he had a free moment, he cracked one of them open, and often asked Moulder questions. Moulder seemed happy to find someone he could make good conversation with.

The ally they'd made in Serafew, Natasha, was pure in both beauty and kindness, making her wildly popular among the soldiers. Some would even fall down and injure themselves on purpose in an attempt to get her to heal them. Seth realized this and scolded them harshly for it, and since then, of course none dared to try that ever again, but some never stopped trying to talk to her whenever the opportunity presented itself.

Then, there was the other person who'd joined them in Serafew, the mercenary Joshua. He seemed to be distant with everyone.

He was lighthearted and joked around, however, the moment anyone tried to get close to him, he would distance himself from them. And even if someone was just having a casual chat with him, he would not speak a single word about his personal life. Behind his cheerful face lied a man who did not want to even try opening up his heart to anyone.

Perhaps his many years as a mercenary had made him wary of others, but Eirika did not think that was all there was to it.

Seth saw right through her, and knew exactly how worried she was. She still hadn't gotten very good at horseback riding, so she continued to ride with him. Because of it, they had ample opportunities to talk about topics that they did not want to discuss with anyone else.

One day, a thick fog had enveloped the land around them since the morning, obscuring their field of vision. The air was chilly, and the soldiers' footsteps were heavy. 

Eirika was lost in thought as she rocked atop the horse. When Seth started talking to her in a low voice, she gasped in surprise.

"Something seems to be bothering you, Milady."

"Hm? Oh, no… not exactly…"

"Is it the mercenary?"

Eirika was surprised that he'd seen right through her. She looked around to make sure that no one else could hear, then answered, "Yes… I think Joshua seems to be keeping a secret of some kind. I have no intention of investigating it, but I'm a bit worried about the fact that he will not open up to everyone."

"I think it would be best to keep watch over his movements."

His tone was firm. It made Eirika uneasy. "What do you mean by that?"

"He's a person who casually switched to our side while he was employed by Grado. There's no guarantee that someone like him-"

"Seth!" Eirika realized what he was trying to say, and interrupted him. "No way, are you saying that he will betray us?"

"I'm saying that it would be best to assume the possibility."

"I… believe him. Even if he does possibly have something to hide, I do not think he is a bad person. And his skill with the sword is very reliable…"

"That is the exact reason why he is terrifying."

Eirika couldn't bring herself to respond.

Seth's apprehensions were probably justified.

If a mercenary of Joshua's skill turned over to the enemy's side in the middle of battle, then… he might be able to destroy Eirika's army in an instant. Just as she feared might happen, she lost her confidence in whether or not it was right to make him one of their allies.

Suddenly, the horse stopped. She started to ask what was wrong, but her body froze.

Several people appeared in front of them. Eirika didn't know where they had come from. They were an unsettling group that seemed as if they had burst up from the ground.

The man standing as the leader was nearing them with shaky, unsteady footsteps. His head was entirely hidden under a hood, and his body was shrouded in a long robe. He couldn’t possibly be an ordinary traveler.

He continued forward until he was standing in front of them.

His facial features, shadowed by the hood, were now easily visible. His eyes were sharp, and his cheeks sunken in. He ordered in a hoarse voice, "Stop, Princess Eirika of Renais."

"...Who are you?" Eirika's hand swiftly moved towards the hilt of her sword. 

All of her allies followed suit and grabbed their weapons in unison.

They had no idea what the man's intentions were. He didn't look like a soldier, but who would challenge them unarmed?

"The bracelet you are wearing… I want you to hand it over to me."

The man's demand baffled Eirika. "My bracelet? What are you going to try to do with it?"

"Do you think I would be privy to such information? His Majesty wishes to have it." 

She guessed that he must be referring to Grado's emperor.

In that moment, she realized they were being ambushed, and bit her lip. They'd intended to march carefully, but the empire seemed to have figured out where they were all the same.

"Do not hand it over, Lady Eirika." Seth said.

She of course nodded.

The man laughed haughtily. "I advise for your own safety that you try not to be stubborn. In this case, I shall tell you one thing. Prince Ephraim's army has already lost to the Grado Army. He is currently in the Renvall Castle dungeon, awaiting his execution."

Eirika’s face stiffened. "That's a lie! My brother would never lose!"

"You can cry all you want, but it's the truth. Ephraim lost. So it would be pointless for you to continue on any further. It is best for you to hand over your bracelet quietly, then run on home."

Eirika glared at him.

He seemed to have anticipated that she would not do as he said, as he chuckled, and continued, "If you will not comply, that is fine. Bring me the hostages!"

The man ordered the group following behind him like shadows. Several people were pushed forward.

They all appeared to be ordinary villagers. There were even small children staring blankly at their surroundings, with no idea what was going on. A slightly older girl was crying and screaming, "Help me!"

So his plan was to use people that have nothing to do with the situation to get Eirika's bracelet.

'How awful…' She whispered, but couldn't move.

"These are hostages I brought with me from Renais. Now hand over that bracelet! If you don't, they will all die!"

"...Understood. I will give it to you, so please let them go."

"Lady Eirika!!"

Seth tried to stop her, but Eirika said with determination in her voice, "We cannot take back the lives of the citizens. Please let me do this, Seth." Eirika dismounted his horse and took off her bracelet.

The man snatched the bracelet out of her hands, then cackled a vulgar laugh into the air. "Yes, this is it! This is the genuine item! His Majesty will certainly be pleased… Now, next, will you drop all of your weapons for me?"

"We refuse." Seth instantly replied. "I doubt you have any intention of letting Lady Eirika return home safely. Do you really think we'll comply with such a request?"

"I don't care what happens to the hostages. By the way, did you know? Rumor has it that huge spider-like monsters are living around here…" The man placed one of his wrinkly hands on a small girl's head. "The monsters will no doubt be pleased if I give these hostages to them…"

The children all burst out crying.

Realizing what their enemy was planning, Eirika screamed.

He was going to take the hostages with him. Eirika felt anger and regret stronger than she ever had before in her life, and glared at the hooded man once more.

"You seem disappointed, princess of Renais. But this is war. There is nothing that the losers can do. The people of Renais, resenting their powerless king, will be eaten by monsters…"

"Silence!" Her voice cut him off mid-sentence like the crack of a whip.

The man jumped back and looked down at Eirika. "Wh… What? Watch your mouth, and know your place…!"

Eirika glared at the man again.

She knew she had startled her opponent. Before she could even realize what she was saying, she yelled angrily, "I… throughout all of this, have told myself that I will never hate Grado. Even when the army attacked the palace, even when I heard that Father was dead, I thought to myself that I must not let my sadness turn into anger. Renais and Grado share a long history of friendship. I did not want to ruin that bond!"

Eirika pictured Prince Lyon's face in her head.

Could he possibly know that his soldiers were committing such atrocities? Could he have allowed them to go through with cruel plots like this one?

There was no way. Surely he didn't know anything about the current situation of the war...

"But if this is Grado's way, then I will not forgive them. If these are the empire's orders… then I will never forgive the Grado Empire!"

"Y-You sound awful full of yourself, girl…!” The man was intimidated by Eirika's anger. His voice sounded indomitable, but it was also shrill with anger. "If you intend to defy me, then I will show no mercy! This will be where you all meet your end!” He disappeared as if he had blown away with the wind.

"Was that magic…?” Eirika panicked and looked around. ‘Where did he go?’ 

"I believe the spiders live in the mountains just ahead of us…"

Lute said, but even when Eirika looked at where she was pointing, the mountains she claimed were there were completely covered in fog, and they could only just barely see them in the distance. 

"Let's hurry. The hostages are in danger!" When Eirika pictured the villagers all huddled together in fear of the presence of the giant spiders, she could hardly stand the thought.

The further they progressed, the thicker the fog became. Even after they lit torches, they couldn’t see very far ahead of them.

Before Eirika even gave her orders, Vanessa said, “I will go to them.”

“But it’s too dangerous in this fog…”

“I will be fine. There is no doubt that I can move faster than all of you on the ground.”

However, the enemy was probably using the fog to hide and wait for Eirika’s army to come to them. It was far too dangerous to let Vanessa go ahead on her own.

While Eirika was deliberating over how to respond, someone else spoke up.

“I will go with her.” The person who stepped forward was Joshua. He spoke in his usual tone of voice, and flashed Vanessa a smile. “I’ve always wanted to try riding a pegasus once. Let me ride with you. While you're saving the hostages, I'll take care of the monster spiders."                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

"...No." She held him back. Why did he say he wanted to ride a pegasus now, of all times? 

He looked back at her, puzzled. 

Eirika felt Seth's gaze on her as she spoke awkwardly, “...I want you to stay here. The person to go with Vanessa will be… Sir Garcia. Will you go with her?”

Garcia was surprised to suddenly be called out, but nodded. “If those are my orders, then of course I’ll go! But… Lady Eirika…?”

The pained look on her face was probably suspicious. Garcia tilted his head.

Joshua asked incredulously, “What? Why not me? I should be able to take out something like spider monsters…”

“It's not that, it’s because there are likely a lot of enemies lying in wait just ahead, so I want you to fight here.” Eirika turned her back to him and avoided explaining anything further.

When Joshua had announced that he wanted to go with Vanessa, she'd immediately remembered the conversation she'd previously had with Seth. 

It was entirely possible that Joshua might betray them. He might kill Vanessa, then turn back over to the Empire's side.

She couldn't deny the fact that she wanted to trust him, but she was also worried. If he betrayed them now, they would lose both Vanessa and the hostages.

"Okay then, let's go." Vanessa helped Garcia mount her pegasus, then the two flew off.

Joshua furrowed his brow slightly and looked at Eirika with a dissatisfied expression on his face, but turned around with a huff and withdrew his sword.

Eirika called out, "Cavalry, march to the front! Because our field of vision is so poor, please always confirm where your allies are before making any movements. We must be careful not to split up, even for a moment…"

Before she was even finished giving her order, enemy soldiers started leaping towards them from within the fog.

As they'd suspected, the Grado soldiers had been waiting all across the plain for them. The injured enemies went down shrieking into the air. 

Eirika's army panicked at first, but only for a moment, and quickly regrouped. Maintaining their formation in the thick fog was no easy task, but the soldiers remained calm. They cut down their enemies while periodically calling out to each other to confirm their positions.

This battle was their first true fight within Grado territory. The enemies they'd fought before could not possibly compare to this group. And on top of that, the Grado soldiers knew this area very well, and used that to their advantage by trying to lure Eirika's army into dangerous areas such as cliffs and swamps whenever they found an opening.

Throughout the grueling battle, Eirika confirmed Joshua's position several times. His red hair stood out even within the fog. He rushed so boldly into the enemy lines that one would think he was being reckless, and broke through areas so that the cavalry could advance. It was clear that he was an essential member of Eirika's army now.

Was her previous judgement a mistake? Perhaps he had noticed that she doubted him, and she had ironically lost his trust in the process...

"Eirika!"

Seth's voice snapped her back to reality. 

An enemy soldier was running straight toward her.

It took all of her strength just to dodge his attack the moment he lunged. If Seth had not rushed over to her, the Grado soldier likely would have skewered her with his lance.

Seth defeated the soldier, then pulled her up atop his horse.

"I'm fine, Seth. I can still fight…"

But Seth ignored her plea. The moment she realized that maybe her concentration was still lacking in battle, her body shrunk back.

The battle was gradually reaching its conclusion. The enemy army seemed to be mostly defeated. Franz was rushing around their ranks and confirming the number of casualties. They had not suffered many sacrifices at all.

“All that’s left is their leader. We have to search for the man that stole the bracelet!”

Eirika shook her head. “No, Seth. I am more worried about the hostages. Let’s follow after Vanessa and Garcia…”

“It seems like that won’t be necessary!” Colm said while looking up at the sky.

Perhaps because of his experience as a thief, his hearing was far better than that of the average person. Even on a battlefield like their current one with poor visibility, his keen senses had been helpful, allowing him to give effective directions to the soldiers.

“I can hear her pegasus’ wings. Sounds like they’re comin’ back here.”

Just as he finished saying that, the noise reached Eirika’s ears. It was the unmistakable sound of wings soaring through the sky.

As the fog slowly started to clear, a lone black shadow became visible. It became much bigger in the blink of an eye, then lightly started to lower in front of Eirika and the others.

Vanessa landed with a small girl in her arms. “I apologize for returning late, Lady Eirika.

Vanessa’s cheerful expression caused Eirika to breathe a sigh of relief. “Good work, Vanessa. What about the other hostages…?”

“They are safe. Since I could not carry such a large group at once, I returned with the youngest child for now.”

“And what about Sir Garcia?”

“He is safe as well, of course. He fought the monsters all by himself. Since there may be others still lurking about, he is staying by the hostages’ side for the time being.”

“So they’ve already been killed…?” Lute cut into the conversation with disappointment in her voice. “However, ‘Spider Monsters’ is not their proper name. That would be ‘Bael.” I really wanted to see one once with my own eyes, but… I’ll at least go just to see their corpses…”

“Lute!” Everyone shouted.

“We don’t have time to be studying spider monsters right now. Leave the rescue of the hostages to Vanessa and the cavalry. Everyone else has to go after the man from before.” Seth ordered.

“Bael are much more endearing than that seedy human…” Lute looked up at Seth, but realized that there was no chance her request would be granted, and nodded her head in acceptance. “Understood. It is unfortunate, but I will likely have another chance to encounter a Bael. Let’s chase after the seedy human for now.”

Seth gave the soldiers their orders, and they all searched for the man who should be hiding within the fog. Before long, he received a report that a man had been found hiding in a thicket at the base of a mountain.

The fog had cleared considerably at that point. They were able to see him with their naked eyes.

The hooded man realized that enemies were coming towards him, and tried to flee. It was likely that he’d decided to try to leave the fighting to his subordinates while he watched from afar atop high ground. Thick tree cover and cliffs blocked him off, and there were no escape routes behind him.

Eirika jumped down from Seth’s horse and ran up to him. “There’s nowhere for you to run! Now hand over my bracelet!”

The man glared at Eirika with bloodshot eyes, and clutched the stolen bracelet tightly. “S… someone… wants to give it to His Majesty…!”

“Why does the Grado Emperor want my bracelet?”

“I-I don’t know…!”

The man muttered a spell without moving his mouth.

Eirika realized quickly what he was doing, and jumped back. A pillar of smoke rose from where she’d been standing.

It was now obvious that he could wield offensive magic.

Battle with a mage was difficult because while they had no physical strength, they could launch an attack with magic even from far away. Those skilled in magic could somewhat defend themselves against it, but the average soldiers, like sword fighters and knights, had no protections at all against it. It was far from uncommon for those who were unskilled in combat to be killed by a single spell. 

Would it be best to send Lute and Artur his way? But they were not used to battle yet, and he might be difficult for them to put up a fight against... 

While Eirika was still at a loss for what to do, Joshua rushed far ahead of her.

Eirika was in complete shock, and before she could call out "Be careful…!" to him, he sliced his sword through the man's skin.

"Ahh…!!" The man stifled a scream, and tried to chant one more spell. 

However, Joshua's attack was faster.

 The moment the sword glistened in the light, the man screamed his death cry. 

"Hey, this is valuable, right? Take good care of it." Joshua said teasingly, then handed the bracelet over to her.

"Th-Thank you, Joshua…"

However, Joshua immediately turned away as if he was rejecting her.

Eirika felt the giant rift between them become even deeper.

The cavalry returned with the hostages soon after. Garcia was of course with them as well.

When asked about what it was like fighting the spider monsters, he simply answered “They’re creepy,” and grimaced. They seemed to be a particularly disgusting monster. Lute, on the other hand, had the opposite reaction from everyone else. A twinkle appeared in her eyes, and she started bombarding him with questions, which disturbed him deeply.

-

That night, they unsurprisingly decided to give up on marching any further for the time being, and rested on the plains. 

After their meal, while everyone else was sitting in a circle and enjoying themselves, Seth called Eirika over to him, and broke away from the group.

She had a feeling she knew what he wanted to talk about, and put her returned bracelet tightly on her wrist, then waited for him to begin speaking.

Seth walked all the way over to the shadow of the trees, where they could not feel the presence of anyone else, then said gravely, “Lord Fado ordered me not to tell you anything until the time was right… But since the secret has been leaked to the Grado Emperor, it is probably best that I tell you now.”

“...About this bracelet?”

Seth nodded. “As you know, Renais has handed down one of the Sacred Stones since ancient times. And the countries of Grado, Frelia, Jehanna, and Rausten all pass down the other four.”

“Yes, it is said that during the ancient war, the Demon King’s power was sealed away within the Sacred Stones. They should currently be enshrined in each of those countries, which protect them. In Renais, our stone is kept in a large shrine, and the people worship it…”

“That stone is a replica.”

Eirika was surprised by his unexpected words. “A replica…? No… I cannot believe it…”

“I have been told that an exact copy was made and placed inside the shrine. The real stone is sealed tightly away in the Renais Castle basement.”

She couldn’t believe what he was saying. She herself had prayed countless times at the shrine where the Sacred Stone was kept, and she’d seen her father hold sacred rites in front of it before. Had all of that been a large-scale performance to keep the real stone hidden from sight?

“That’s… but… isn’t it pitiful for the people who have prayed at the replica? Everyone visited that shrine with such pure, devoted hearts…”

Eirika’s clouded expression made Seth smile. “No, on the contrary, it was likely for their sake. Lord Fado said that the Sacred Stones contain such great power that they have an effect on people’s hearts… and they will be entranced by that power, so much so that they cannot look away from them. That is why one of the previous kings thought up the idea to hide the real stone. And the key that unlocks the seal is that bracelet.”

Eirika looked down at her bracelet once more.

When she was young, her father had given her and her brother each a bracelet. Her father’s voice had been so uncharacteristically insistent when he told them to take good care of them, that Eirika had always thought it strange.

“Father… never told us even one word about how important these bracelets are…”

“He probably thought the day when we would need to unlock the seal would never come, and decided that it would be for the best. It is likely that Lord Ephraim still does not know his bracelet’s secret. Lord Fado only told me in the case of a one in a million scenario.”

“But then how did the Grado Empire learn of it…?”

“They probably found a way to get the information out of Lord Fado.”

There shouldn’t have been an easy way to get her father to spill such an important secret. No matter how terrifying their methods were… Eirika felt the warmth drain from her body. She couldn’t bring herself to think about it. Now wasn’t the time to lament the tragedy that had befallen her father.

“As Natasha said, the Grado Empire is trying to destroy the Sacred Stones. That is consistent with their actions so far... In order for the emperor to destroy Renais’ Sacred Stone, they are after my bracelet.”

*Maybe.”

“Brother also has the same bracelet as I. So that means…”

“If that man’s words are to be trusted, then Lord Ephraim has already been captured. It is possible that they have stolen his bracelet.”

“Brother…” Eirika clasped her hands together tightly.

They were so close to reaching him… and yet they still might not be fast enough to be able to save him.

“The enemy knows that we have already entered Grado Territory. If they become impatient… it is conceivable that they will execute him.”

“Yes. We haven’t a moment to waste. Let’s hurry!” Eirika looked up at the edges of the mountains above them, clearly visible in the night sky now that the fog had cleared. And past that, she could finally see Renvall Castle.

[scripture-pictures]

https://victorcarjan.blogspot.com/2018/11/bible-case-for-no-have-baby.html?m=1 Scripture to back up why I think its wrong to have babies!

Isaiah 13:8 And they shall be afraid: pangs and sorrows shall take hold of them;

they shall be in pain as a woman that travaileth:

they shall be amazed one at another; their faces shall be as flames.

1st: A horrible punishment from God is letting some guys know they will be in pain

like a woman giving birth!.....normally never have to think about this;

but if its so bad to me, why would I accept this precept of "nature" to put the girl I theoretically

would really love, in this sort of punishment!

Is it a punishment?

my answer is YES!!

Genesis 3:16

“Unto the woman he said,

I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and

thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children;

and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.”

2nd Definitely a punishment the amount of pain they go through!;

so one way to avoid this punishment would be to avoid having the babies right?

I perceive, that is what I would do and if one is truly a believer and has faith,

then they would be willing to wait until the after-life right?

ISAIAH 56:4 For thus saith the LORD unto the eunuchs

that keep my sabbaths, and choose the things that please me, and take hold of my covenant;

5 Even unto them will I give in mine house and within my walls a place

and a name better than of sons and of daughters:

I will give them an everlasting name, that shall not be cut off.

3rd point: Eunuchs, as far as I understand, means like a barren man;

a man that doesn't have babies, or can't have babies, or chooses not to have babies.

Sounds like God says he will reward them better than the sons and daughters!..

.so then its a reward?

Jesus in LUKE 23:29

28But Jesus turning unto them said, Daughters of Jerusalem,

weep not for me, but weep for yourselves, and for your children.

29For, behold, the days are coming, in the which they shall say,

Blessed are the barren,

and the wombs that never bare,

and the paps which never gave suck.

30Then shall they begin to say to the mountains, Fall on us; and to the hills,

Cover us. 31For if they do these things

in a green tree,

what shall be done in the dry?

ISAIAH Chapter 32

9 Rise up, ye women that are at ease; hear my voice,

ye careless daughters; give ear unto my speech.

10 Many days and years shall ye be troubled,

ye careless women: for the vintage shall fail, the gathering shall not come.

11 Tremble, ye women that are at ease; be troubled, ye careless ones:

strip you, and make you bare, and gird sackcloth upon your loins.

12 They shall lament for the teats,

for the pleasant fields, for the fruitful vine.

4th: who are they? I'm not sure!...but as I remember at this point, the context of his message

was that it was good to not have babies at least in those days for sure!..

but its a help to an argument using scripture as the sword and shield to state its better to

not have babies in this world presently in.

ISAIAH 54:1 Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear;

break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail

with child: for more are the children of the desolate

than the children of the married wife, saith the LORD.

5th: Clearly God, creator, is saying to woman to sing and be happy and rejoice

like she won something by not having babies!.. she avoided a major punishment

of woman by not having babies, I believe that is certainly true!...

Jeremiah 16:1-4

1The word of the LORD came also unto me, saying,

2Thou shalt not take thee a wife, neither shalt thou have sons

or daughters in this place.

3For thus saith the LORD concerning the sons and concerning the daughters

that are born in this place, and concerning their mothers that bare

them, and concerning their fathers that begat them in this land;

4They shall die of grievous deaths; they shall not be lamented;

neither shall they be buried; but they shall be as dung upon the face of the earth:

and they shall be consumed by the sword, and by famine; and

their carcases shall be meat for the fowls of heaven, and for the

beasts of the earth.

(sounds like the Feast of the fowls at the end of the days as mentioned in

Revelations and in the old testament of Ezekiel,

please fear God and pay the respects due to make full good of these warnings)

Jeremiah 4:31 For I have heard a voice as of a woman in travail,

and the anguish as of her that bringeth forth her first child,

the voice of the daughter of Zion, that bewaileth herself...

6th ahh, pain...the first child must be a lot worse than its true;

the first one hurts more and after that its been opened already and stretched out

so I guess it makes sense..but I just don't like it anymore at all. its too gruesome sounding..

Jeremiah 13:21 What wilt thou say when he shall punish thee?

for thou hast taught them to be captains,

and as chief over thee: shall not sorrows take thee,

as a woman in travail?

Jeremiah 22:23 O inhabitant of Lebanon, that makest thy nest in the cedars,

how gracious shalt thou be when pangs come upon thee,

the pain as of a woman in travail!

7th: Its not gracious and its a punishment; and its a warning from God to man,

that if you do wrong won't you get punished like a woman in travail or something?

HORRIBLE!! thus if I conclude its a horrible punishment how can I then justify

wanting to put someone through it?

Prayer; please God never let me have to go through pains

like a woman in travail or anything like it;

or like how Krillin from dragon ball z was depicted in those videos to help understand scripture;

please help me;

I do believe that before the punishment it was different having babies;

I don't know how exactly; but clearly different since it says greatly multiplying the pain..

8.24.18 2.34 A.M. update

Thoughts: Thus then, if we be towards the end of the world based on all the signs shown;

we may be in a similar scenario

ECCLESIASTES 3:5 a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

1 JOHN 3: 9 Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin;

for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin,

because he is born of God.

Leviticus 12 WHY SIN OFFERING FOR HAVING BABY?

1And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying, 2Speak unto the children of Israel, saying,

If a woman have conceived seed, and born a man child:

then she shall be unclean seven days; according to the days

of the separation for her infirmity shall she be unclean.

5But if she bear a maid child, then she shall be unclean

two weeks, as in her separation: and she shall continue in the blood of

her purifying threescore and six days.

6 And when the days of her purifying are fulfilled, for a son, or for a daughter,

she shall bring a lamb of the first year for a burnt offering, and a young pigeon,

or a turtledove, for a sin offering, unto the door of the tabernacle

of the congregation, unto the priest:

7 Who shall offer it before the LORD, and make an atonement for her; and

she shall be cleansed from the issue of her blood. This is the law for her that hath

born a male or a female.

8 And if she be not able to bring a lamb, then she shall bring two turtles,

or two young pigeons; the one for the burnt offering, and the

other for a sin offering: and the priest shall make an atonement for her,

and she shall be clean.

MISCELLANEOUS

Jesus said in MATTHEW 24:19

19 And woe unto them that are with child,

and to them that give suck in those days!

Jesus said in LUKE 21:22+23

22 For these be the days of vengeance, that all things which are written may be fulfilled.

23 But woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck, in those days!

for there shall be great distress in the land, and wrath upon this people.

Jesus said in MARK 13:17

17 But woe to them that are with child, and to them that give suck in those days!

This regarding HOSEA 9, I believe can be best understood when referencing the passage

in ECCLESIASTES where the preacher saw all the oppressions done under the sun and praised the

dead more than the living, and said that better than both the dead and the living was that which never

existed. We also have Jeremiah in the book of JEREMIAH wishing he was never born, and Jonah in

JONAH wishing for death, and even Elijah wanting to not live. So if the world is a painful place to exist,

to bring a child into that world wouldn’t be righteous, and thus,

God giving them a miscarrying womb could be a greatly misunderstood mercy!

Who would feel good about bringing a child into this world to have it

be treated like the woman in Gibeah from Judges 19?

HOSEA 9

9 They have deeply corrupted themselves, as in the days of Gibeah: therefore

he will remember their iniquity, he will visit their sins.

11 As for Ephraim, their glory shall fly away like a bird, from the birth, and from the womb, and from the conception.

12 Though they bring up their children, yet will I bereave them,

that there shall not be a man left: yea, woe also to them when I depart from them!

13 Ephraim, as I saw Tyrus, is planted in a pleasant place:

but Ephraim shall bring forth his children to the murderer.

14 Give them, O LORD: what wilt thou give? give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts.

Only more recently did I see this prayer by Hosea as a prayer of Mercy and love.

I wonder if others had similar experiences searching for the kingdom of God and his righteousness.

Also remember Rachel died during giving birth to her 2nd Child,

Genesis 35:16 ...and Rachel travailed, and she had hard labour. 17And it came to pass, when she was in hard labour, that the midwife said unto her, Fear not; thou shalt have

this son also. 18And it came to pass, as her soul was in departing,

(for she died) that she called his name Benoni:

but his father called him Benjamin. 19And Rachel died...

Jeremiah 9:24 King James Version (KJV)

24 But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the Lord which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the Lord.

[frederickwiddowson]

Genesis, chapter 48 comments: Jacob blesses Joseph's sons

Genesis 48:1 ¶  And it came to pass after these things, that one told Joseph, Behold, thy father is sick: and he took with him his two sons, Manasseh and Ephraim. 2 And one told Jacob, and said, Behold, thy son Joseph cometh unto thee: and Israel strengthened himself, and sat upon the bed. 3  And Jacob said unto Joseph, God Almighty appeared unto me at Luz in the land of Canaan, and blessed me, 4  And said unto me, Behold, I will make thee fruitful, and multiply thee, and I will make of thee a multitude of people; and will give this land to thy seed after thee for an everlasting possession. 5  And now thy two sons, Ephraim and Manasseh, which were born unto thee in the land of Egypt before I came unto thee into Egypt, are mine; as Reuben and Simeon, they shall be mine. 6  And thy issue, which thou begettest after them, shall be thine, and shall be called after the name of their brethren in their inheritance. 7  And as for me, when I came from Padan, Rachel died by me in the land of Canaan in the way, when yet there was but a little way to come unto Ephrath: and I buried her there in the way of Ephrath; the same is Bethlehem.

Upon hearing that Jacob was ill Joseph took his sons, Manasseh and Ephraim, to see him. Jacob was apparently pretty out of it as he had to be told they were there. He then relates the blessing God bestowed on him through his father Isaac and his grandfather Abraham.

Genesis 28:13  And, behold, the LORD stood above it, and said, I am the LORD God of Abraham thy father, and the God of Isaac: the land whereon thou liest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed; 14  And thy seed shall be as the dust of the earth, and thou shalt spread abroad to the west, and to the east, and to the north, and to the south: and in thee and in thy seed shall all the families of the earth be blessed. 15  And, behold, I am with thee, and will keep thee in all places whither thou goest, and will bring thee again into this land; for I will not leave thee, until I have done that which I have spoken to thee of.

Remember that it was Abraham who would be told that Canaan was to be an everlasting possession.

Genesis 17:7 ¶  And I will establish my covenant between me and thee and thy seed after thee in their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be a God unto thee, and to thy seed after thee.

8  And I will give unto thee, and to thy seed after thee, the land wherein thou art a stranger, all the land of Canaan, for an everlasting possession; and I will be their God.

Jacob states that Joseph’s sons are just as much a part of this blessing as are Joseph’s brothers, Jacob’s own sons Reuben and Simeon. He established them as tribes included in the inheritance by saying that their descendants would be named after them. Then, Jacob mentions his beloved Rachel and where she was buried. It has been many, many years but the pain is still there as it is with many of us who have lost a loved one decades in the past.

Genesis 35:16 ¶  And they journeyed from Bethel; and there was but a little way to come to Ephrath: and Rachel travailed, and she had hard labour. 17  And it came to pass, when she was in hard labour, that the midwife said unto her, Fear not; thou shalt have this son also. 18  And it came to pass, as her soul was in departing, (for she died) that she called his name Benoni: but his father called him Benjamin. 19  And Rachel died, and was buried in the way to Ephrath, which is Bethlehem. 20  And Jacob set a pillar upon her grave: that is the pillar of Rachel’s grave unto this day.

Genesis 48:8 ¶  And Israel beheld Joseph’s sons, and said, Who are these? 9  And Joseph said unto his father, They are my sons, whom God hath given me in this place. And he said, Bring them, I pray thee, unto me, and I will bless them. 10  Now the eyes of Israel were dim for age, so that he could not see. And he brought them near unto him; and he kissed them, and embraced them. 11  And Israel said unto Joseph, I had not thought to see thy face: and, lo, God hath shewed me also thy seed. 12  And Joseph brought them out from between his knees, and he bowed himself with his face to the earth. 13  And Joseph took them both, Ephraim in his right hand toward Israel’s left hand, and Manasseh in his left hand toward Israel’s right hand, and brought them near unto him. 14  And Israel stretched out his right hand, and laid it upon Ephraim’s head, who was the younger, and his left hand upon Manasseh’s head, guiding his hands wittingly; for Manasseh was the firstborn. 15  And he blessed Joseph, and said, God, before whom my fathers Abraham and Isaac did walk, the God which fed me all my life long unto this day, 16  The Angel which redeemed me from all evil, bless the lads; and let my name be named on them, and the name of my fathers Abraham and Isaac; and let them grow into a multitude in the midst of the earth. 17 And when Joseph saw that his father laid his right hand upon the head of Ephraim, it displeased him: and he held up his father’s hand, to remove it from Ephraim’s head unto Manasseh’s head. 18 And Joseph said unto his father, Not so, my father: for this is the firstborn; put thy right hand upon his head. 19 And his father refused, and said, I know it, my son, I know it: he also shall become a people, and he also shall be great: but truly his younger brother shall be greater than he, and his seed shall become a multitude of nations. 20  And he blessed them that day, saying, In thee shall Israel bless, saying, God make thee as Ephraim and as Manasseh: and he set Ephraim before Manasseh. 21  And Israel said unto Joseph, Behold, I die: but God shall be with you, and bring you again unto the land of your fathers. 22  Moreover I have given to thee one portion above thy brethren, which I took out of the hand of the Amorite with my sword and with my bow.

Many times questions are asked in the Bible in a sort of rhetorical way. The understanding is that the person asking the question knows the answer but the requirement for an answer confirms a greater principle. For instance, in Genesis we know that God knows everything so this question becomes a requirement for someone to admit to something.

Genesis 3:8  And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.

   9 ¶  And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou? 10  And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.

Jacob is blind, or nearly so, as a consequence of age. As part of the judgment we in this world are enduring, old age leads to many physical failings on the part of even the noblest and upright of God’s men and women of destiny.

1Kings 14:4  And Jeroboam’s wife did so, and arose, and went to Shiloh, and came to the house of Ahijah. But Ahijah could not see; for his eyes were set by reason of his age.

Also read the metaphorical speech regarding old age that Solomon gives in Ecclesiastes

12.

1 ¶  Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth, while the evil days come not, nor the years draw nigh, when thou shalt say, I have no pleasure in them; 2 While the sun, or the light, or the moon, or the stars, be not darkened, nor the clouds return after the rain: 3 In the day when the keepers of the house shall tremble, and the strong men shall bow themselves, and the grinders cease because they are few, and those that look out of the windows be darkened, 4  And the doors shall be shut in the streets, when the sound of the grinding is low, and he shall rise up at the voice of the bird, and all the daughters of musick shall be brought low; 5  Also when they shall be afraid of that which is high, and fears shall be in the way, and the almond tree shall flourish, and the grasshopper shall be a burden, and desire shall fail: because man goeth to his long home, and the mourners go about the streets: 6  Or ever the silver cord be loosed, or the golden bowl be broken, or the pitcher be broken at the fountain, or the wheel broken at the cistern. 7  Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was: and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it.

Joseph acknowledged that God had given him his sons and then Jacob said he wanted to bless them. Jacob expresses his joy and satisfaction that he never thought to see Joseph’s face again and yet now he has not only gotten to see Joseph’s face but also his children. One of the laments of we parents who have lost a child to death is that we will not only never see their face again in our earthly life but we will not see the children they might have had. It is an enduring pain and grief for some.

Joseph is holding his boys close and presents them to his father to be blessed and bows himself to the ground, this second greatest man in the world’s greatest superpower acknowledging the authority of his sheepherding father. It is a lesson we should learn as many of those reading this have risen to a higher social, economic, or political strata than their father but still honor him in respect. Position often has nothing to do with worthiness for respect.

Joseph presented the children in a specific order, so that Manasseh, the eldest, would receive the right hand of blessing from his grandfather, Jacob. Jacob crosses his hands and places his right hand, instead, on Ephraim’s head, and blessed Joseph. He mentions the Angel, capital A, as protecting him and asks that Angel for a blessing on the children and asks that they be included in his posterity and in the inheritance promised to his descendants. We’ve already seen what the word angel refers to but let’s review as Roman and Persian mythology have dominated a significant part of Christian history and have polluted our thinking ability and colored the lenses through which we view the Bible’s clear statements.

Remember, an angel is a presence, an appearance of something that is somewhere else, representing that person or thing but with power and ability that would prevent us from distinguishing the difference.

Isaiah 63:9  In all their affliction he was afflicted, and the angel of his presence saved them: in his love and in his pity he redeemed them; and he bare them, and carried them all the days of old.

Matthew 18:10  Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones; for I say unto you, That in heaven their angels do always behold the face of my Father which is in heaven.

Acts 12:15  And they said unto her, Thou art mad. But she constantly affirmed that it was even so. Then said they, It is his angel.

Revelation 1:20  The mystery of the seven stars which thou sawest in my right hand, and the seven golden candlesticks. The seven stars are the angels of the seven churches: and the seven candlesticks which thou sawest are the seven churches.

Christ is the appearance of God; the angel of the Lord, His presence. I want to repeat the definition of an angel in Isaiah 63:9.

Isaiah 63:9  In all their affliction he was afflicted, and the angel of his presence saved them: in his love and in his pity he redeemed them; and he bare them, and carried them all the days of old.

Galatians 4:14  And my temptation which was in my flesh ye despised not, nor rejected; but received me as an angel of God, even as Christ Jesus.

(Even can link two things that are the same such as I, even I, in Genesis 6:17 and over a dozen other verses.)

Who led the Hebrews out of Egypt.

Judges 2:1 ¶  And an angel of the LORD came up from Gilgal to Bochim, and said, I made you to go up out of Egypt, and have brought you unto the land which I sware unto your fathers; and I said, I will never break my covenant with you.

You can imagine the angel of the LORD (LORD with all letters capitalized is Jehovah) or the angel of God as this Angel.

Joseph tried to remove his father’s hands, which Jacob had placed very deliberately where they were in full understanding of what he intended, onto the proper child in the order that he thought they should be placed. Jacob insisted, though, that Ephraim the younger would be greater than the elder. This is not the first time we have seen this, is it? Jacob himself was the younger child who supplanted the elder. But, this isn’t trickery or deception here. This blessing is from the beginning done wittingly.

The great leader to come, Joshua, a type of Christ in His Second Coming to conquer and rule, came out of Ephraim.

Numbers 13:8  Of the tribe of Ephraim, Oshea the son of Nun… 16  These are the names of the men which Moses sent to spy out the land. And Moses called Oshea the son of Nun Jehoshua.

Jehoshua is a different spelling of the name Joshua.

Ephraim has its issues as a tribe which shall come out in the narrative as you read. Jacob admits he is dying but tells them they will see the land, meaning their descendants will, that was promised to them. Again, verse 22 is also a prophecy of time to come.

Genesis 15:16  But in the fourth generation they shall come hither again: for the iniquity of the Amorites is not yet full.

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John 11 ~New International Version (NIV)

The Death of Lazarus 11 Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. 2 (This Mary, whose brother Lazarus now lay sick, was the same one who poured perfume on the Lord and wiped his feet with her hair.) 3 So the sisters sent word to Jesus, “Lord, the one you love is sick.” 4 When he heard this, Jesus said, “This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.” 5 Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. 6 So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days, 7 and then he said to his disciples, “Let us go back to Judea.” 8 “But Rabbi,” they said, “a short while ago the Jews there tried to stone you, and yet you are going back?” 9 Jesus answered, “Are there not twelve hours of daylight? Anyone who walks in the daytime will not stumble, for they see by this world’s light. 10 It is when a person walks at night that they stumble, for they have no light.” 11 After he had said this, he went on to tell them, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I am going there to wake him up.” 12 His disciples replied, “Lord, if he sleeps, he will get better.” 13 Jesus had been speaking of his death, but his disciples thought he meant natural sleep. 14 So then he told them plainly, “Lazarus is dead, 15 and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.” 16 Then Thomas (also known as Didymus[a]) said to the rest of the disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.”

Jesus Comforts the Sisters of Lazarus 

17 On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days. 18 Now Bethany was less than two miles[b] from Jerusalem, 19 and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother. 20 When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home. 21 “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.” 23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” 24 Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” 27 “Yes, Lord,” she replied, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.” 28 After she had said this, she went back and called her sister Mary aside. “The Teacher is here,” she said, “and is asking for you.” 29 When Mary heard this, she got up quickly and went to him. 30 Now Jesus had not yet entered the village, but was still at the place where Martha had met him. 31 When the Jews who had been with Mary in the house, comforting her, noticed how quickly she got up and went out, they followed her, supposing she was going to the tomb to mourn there. 32 When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” 33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 34 “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. 35 Jesus wept. 36 Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!” 37 But some of them said, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?”

Jesus Raises Lazarus From the Dead

38 Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. 39 “Take away the stone,” he said. “But, Lord,” said Martha, the sister of the dead man, “by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days.” 40 Then Jesus said, “Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?” 41 So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. 42 I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.” 43 When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” 44 The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face. Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”

The Plot to Kill Jesus

45 Therefore many of the Jews who had come to visit Mary, and had seen what Jesus did, believed in him. 46 But some of them went to the Pharisees and told them what Jesus had done. 47 Then the chief priests and the Pharisees called a meeting of the Sanhedrin. “What are we accomplishing?” they asked. “Here is this man performing many signs. 48 If we let him go on like this, everyone will believe in him, and then the Romans will come and take away both our temple and our nation.” 49 Then one of them, named Caiaphas, who was high priest that year, spoke up, “You know nothing at all! 50 You do not realize that it is better for you that one man die for the people than that the whole nation perish.” 51 He did not say this on his own, but as high priest that year he prophesied that Jesus would die for the Jewish nation, 52 and not only for that nation but also for the scattered children of God, to bring them together and make them one. 53 So from that day on they plotted to take his life. 54 Therefore Jesus no longer moved about publicly among the people of Judea. Instead he withdrew to a region near the wilderness, to a village called Ephraim, where he stayed with his disciples. 55 When it was almost time for the Jewish Passover, many went up from the country to Jerusalem for their ceremonial cleansing before the Passover. 56 They kept looking for Jesus, and as they stood in the temple courts they asked one another, “What do you think? Isn’t he coming to the festival at all?” 57 But the chief priests and the Pharisees had given orders that anyone who found out where Jesus was should report it so that they might arrest him.www.biblegateway.com and Internet credit image