#Emoton

[dykedvonte]

I think a big misunderstanding is the power people give Curly to actually change things about the way the pony express operates or could’ve done things on the Tulpar.

We are talking about a company that docks pay for bad synergy despite mandated psych evals that should tell which staff members would work well together, only allots for 5 hours of sleep despite having literally no other tasks to truly do and locks all resources behind the access of one person. The last one is likely to manage resources and make it easier to justify collective punishment and blaming one person for it; someone needs something in “excess” or the captain gives in? It’s all on them your pay is docked. Instant resentment.

It’s insidious how the company works, it’s by design to distract you from coming after them, to force tensions to line their own pockets. With all the restrictions and forced interactions, altercations are bound to happen. 5 hours of sleep a day, limited sources of entertainment, no real tasks… the monotony alone would cause bad cabin fever, mix that with just only one absolute mediator and you get the exact environment that allows shit like in the game to happen.

The idea he could just complain and try to throw his weight around to get them to dig into their pocket for the crews comfort is laughable and misses the predatory and dehumanizing aspect of capitalism the Pony Express represents. Curly was and is still just another asset to them. Being a top show pony doesn’t mean he’s anywhere close to the actual top. He is the top of the working ladder, not whoever’s in corporate, he wouldn’t even be on the bottom step unlike what Jimmy perceives. The resounding recommendations he would get are almost mocking as they throw him out like nothing just like the rest. Being a shitty fucking company, how much do you bet they’d mean anything anyways, especially since he wanted to leave the field all together.

He made a fuss and they didn’t listen, he says he should’ve done more but you can tell he knows it wouldn’t have changed anything. Jobs like this are willing to make a sacrifice if it means even a penny more. Curly makes a bigger fuss they likely would’ve just found an “unrelated” reason to fire him, hired a more pliable guy or, terrifyingly, promoted Jimmy. The company was failing, going to shut down whether anything happened on the ship or not. But knowing that they were shutting down and that everyone, including him, would be out of a job with this being their last paycheck, he had to factor in not destroying the last bit of their financial stabilities combined with every other issue on the vessel and his own. He gets another cryopod or locks and then he has to break to them that they are not only fired but there will be substantial cuts to their paychecks due to the “upgrades” (things that already should’ve been in place on their part) on top of anything else that could be docked along the way.

You can blame him for saying it so early into the trip but then again, if he mentioned it later who’s to say it wouldn’t have been worse? On the capitalism side alone how would people in a galaxy away from home, out of a job and already stir crazy react? Don’t get me started on how Jimmy would have reacted if he realized he only had two days left to fix what would be a very hard to miss “problem” in his head…

I can’t even consider explaining this as devils advocate because it’s just facts of the world we and they live in and factors that heavily affected the situation. People are just so quick to make claims on the ease of the choices when P.E literally makes it hard to choose to do anything but suck it up.

[mirmoria]

ep.4 Vee from love mechanics will forever be my favourite despair animal

[highlordofkrypton]

MORE JOHAN RAMBLES...

Secret santa got me thinking about how Johan was originally an orphan found wandering in the streets with no parents, and his strangeness made him an outcast in the other children in the orphanage + no one wanted to adopt him until his two fathers came around, each with a different set of skills to help orient him in the world.

I know I have him as Nyx in one fic, but thinking about how if Tamsand adopted him, it would come full circle to his origins when I first made him.

One father (a pediatrician!) was kind and taught him empathy, softness, gentleness and was patient with him, and the other was a ruthless businessman. That father taught him that the world is ugly, and he should take what he wants, but in a smart way. He also taught Johan to satiate the monsters with blood, and was his guiding hand to toe the line on being morally gray. Murder, but with good reason and proper methodology.

Soft Tamlin and morally gray Rhysand plus baby JOhan my new ROMAN EMPIRE!! and here I thought it was gonna be Wildflowers Rhysand, Masaya and Johan 😭

I just, I'm just crying at the thought WE'VE COME FULL CIRCLE PACK IT UP YA'LL

[emotionally-happy-pyro]

Hudda humph hmmm!!

[[Hello! Welcome to Pyro's blog! Feel free to send in asks, I really enjoy answering them!]]

Ooc, things to note:

☆I'm quite new to Tf2, so please be patient with me! I very much love Pyro and I think that our personalities overlap, which is why I chose to play this character!

☆I headcanon Pyro to be Aro/Ace, but very affectionate. Lots of hugging and stuff :))

☆I also headcanon them to be non-binary, or rather, doesn't care what you refer to them as

☆I love making Pyro-style drawings, please keep those asks coming! It really makes my day when people interact! :D

☆ Go ahead and aim some asks at me, the mod, if you like(?) I doubt anyone would care, but if anyone's curious about my thoughts or a drawing from me, I don't bite!

[hauntedwizardmoment]

we keep talking about the clones on game changer but we fail to realize that they do frequently find themselves in an escape room (jace has locked them in the basement and forgotten/refused to unlock the door multiple times so they had to find another way out)

[adamsrcnan]

all his life jean moreau has been stuck in survival mode, each day he woke up still breathing was a blessing that felt more like a curse, and now we will get to see him relax, breathe, and let go enough to fall in love. to have a future, to have a life, to heal.

[ruminate88]

It feels like it’s in my stomach and it’s been so deep inside me soooo long, it’s finally made it’s way up towards my chest. I’m nauseous and I’m just waiting to cough it up so I don’t choke on it. It’s that sick feeling of “I need to seek approval from my exes.” I’ve tried to let this go so long and re-wire my WHOLE self, not just my brain. I want to be so unrecognizable that if my exes saw me again, they’d tremble. That would be amazing 🤩 I believe it!!! I’m ready!!!

[feliaes]

it’s insane how it actually mentally hurts when i think about this one specific video game bc i have so many bittersweet memories attached to it

i can’t even play it bc it just makes me so so sad for no reason and it’s not even a sad game what is even going on with me help

[sunrisestarlight]

Book Quotes #1

"So many misconceptions surround the notion of heroism. Far too many categorize a hero as a champion on the battlefield, a commander of legions, a master of rare talent or ability. Granted, there have been heroes who fit those descriptions. But many men of great evil as well. Heed me. A hero sacrifices for the greater good. A hero is true to his or her conscience. In short, heroism means doing the right thing regardless of the consequences. Although any person could fit that description, very few do. Chose this day to be one of them." -Galloran, Beyonders: A World Without Heroes

[continuousmeowing]

. accurate depiction of how i've been feeling as i listen to hfth. i am slowly fallung apart (affectionate)

[peachmuses]

sometimes im like i forget how to write and then i write and i cry

[pinkcadillaccas]

I think one thing allistics just do not get is that frustration at not being understood, when you're saying things exactly as they are and doing everything to get across your point and they hear it as cold or disingenuous because you're not reacting how they think you should be

[iwishiwasawhiteguyin1985]

I absolutely think this would be a thing.

And Dick would absolutely starting with Tim try and redirect Bruces moods towards himself bc hes the oldest hes gotta take care of kid siblings.

Bc Dick has always been Bruces emotional regulation.

And yes, it wouldnt really start until Tim bc Dick was so pissed with Bruce when jaybin was a thing he wouldnt have been around often unless Bruce was REALLY bad to the point even over in Blüd criminals were talking about how off the little bird had been and how batman didnt seem to care and was business as usual

But after Jays death??? He wouldn’t let another kid go through that. Like yeah he initially tells Tim to basically go knock himself out have fun being Robin but a few days later he wraps up whatever case he’d been working in and everything Tim had said to him hits him and hes like noPE WAIT GOTTA GO CHECK ON THE KIDDO

He already failed one kid he wasn’t gonna fail another.

And like its only been a fee days and Tim is already used to being ignored by adults bc FUCK the Drakes.

Dick checks on him and yells at bruce and then, the cycle well and truly begins. Bc you Jason would tell Dick if bruce had been really bad, but it took a lot for Jason to say an adult was angry enough it bothered him. He was from crime alley he grew up on the streets he knew what angry adults were like.

But Tim??? He was neglected but never had he been in the care of such an emotionally volatile person. It took much less for Tim to say ‘hey B seems really upset today is this normal????’ And like he just wanted to know how to fix it how to please him how to be Robin for him and dick is just like….. whelp ill be there on my day off Timbo don’t worry abt it leave him be.

And thats just…. How things roll. Then eventually Dick winds up back in Gotham bc Blüd is pretty much completely gone after that explosion and it isn’t safe for people to be there anymore so he’s back at the manor and and just slips back into his Robin days of being Bruces emotional support orphan and keeping B occupied and training Tim.

Then Jay back and Damian is brought to them and oh, Dick sees so much of himself in that angry hurt confused little boy.

Bruce and Jason constantly fight and Dick constantly shoves his way between them, forcing them apart and mediating. Eventually convinces Jay to please leave dealing with Bruce to him because ‘Little wing let me help you now in sorry i didn’t enough before’ and Jay genuinely doesn’t know what to do with a Dick Grayson who looks so broken and defeated. So Dick texts him when family dinner is gonna be on dinner days Bruce either isn’t there or is in a good mood. And things get a bit better on the Jayson side of things.

But Bruce ignores Damian. Barely ever acknowledges his existence. Dick watches as Damian struggles. Damian isn’t good at communicating his needs and rarely speaks at all but when he does it is stiff and so formal and that distinctly brit-ish english accent most english as a second language speakers from literally anywhere but Canada or the US speaks and its so formal and grammatically correct- as if out of a textbook.. Dick realizes all this one night as he hears Damian muttering to himself, crying in his room, Arabic and mandarin rolling off his tongue smoothly and- Dick only catches a few of the Arabic words here and there but by god.

The amount of *emotion* in that boys voice. Dick knows a little bit of Arabic. He picked it up when Talia and Bruce had dated all those years ago. He slowly approaches Damian and pulls him close, and just says *’I’ve got you, habibi, you are safe now. You are okay. I will protect you’* in stilted Arabic and its awkward on his lips after so many years of disuse and that basically sums up all of his skill with the language he has anymore but Damian *breaks*. And he realizes,

It’s not that Damian doesn’t have things he wants to say. He isn’t just being stubborn and giving the silent treatment. He just quite literally *does not know the words behind his feelings about everything happening right now in his life*.

And well, doesn’t that just strike Dick as so hauntingly familiar because his own english was similarly shaky and tenuous at best when taken in by bruce at a similar age because he grew up speaking a mix of Yiddish and Russian and Spanish and Romani and oh, his newest brothers anger is because he cant communicate. he is lashing out because he is frustrated and doesn’t know how to express what he really feels in a tangible way anyone at the manor really understands. Like a baby who cannot yet speak he is acting out and confused because he does not understand. All he gets is keywords and the cold callous emotions of Batman’s face, and disdain on Bruces. He starts learning more Arabic again both on his own and with Damians help and in return Dick helps Damian learn more english and helps him where Bruce leaves him to flounder. Bruce who is damn well nearly fluent in Arabic doesn’t think to maybe speak his son’s first language with him bc why would he? Damian spoke english to him when they first met so clearly he must speak it plenty fine.

Tims parents die and bruce gives him a pat on the shoulder and doesn’t say another word. Dick is there when Tim gets angry and screams and punches and yells. Bruce tries to start yelling at Tim when he walks in on him just punching nightwing and screaming at him one time, and Dick immediately whips around and yells at bruce that ‘my brother is angry and grieving isnt it better he feels safe letting it out with me instead of taking it to the streets like you did with me?!’ And bruce just grunts and walks away.

Even after watching his mother die Bruce still ignores Damian and Dick is there to hold him and comfort him because ‘oh, habibi it is okay i know how this feels it will get better i promise i love you you are safe.’ He knows how it feels to watch helplessly as his mother falls to her death after all.

He keeps Damian close and yells at Bruce a few weeks later when he gets angry at Damian because while on patrol he stumbled and missed nearly fell when dick had taken a second too long for Damian’s comfort to shoot off his grappling hook and ‘Robin you cant let yourself be emotional like that on patrol!’ And Dick just absolutely lays into bruce.

Dick keeps himself firmly lodged between Bruces moods and his boys. He calls them his brothers. But those are *his* boys. And then Bruce is gone in the time stream and everyone’s hurting from it and Tim hunts him down, when he finds evidence that hes alive, because being Batman is killing Dick.

Never mind that Dick had pushed him away he knew it wasn’t really personal and yeah it bothered him that Damian got to be Robin to Dicks batman but its *fine* he is used to going it alone thank-you. Even though it coming from Dick of all people really hurt. But after he calms from the anger he understands it, Damian is just a kid. And Tim spent most of his time with the Titans anyways. But he hates seeing Dick destroy himself this way so he gets Bruce back.

After all of that, and when the dust finally settles Bruce starts actually trying. And dick is bitter and jaded but takes it all with a smile as Bruce takes his boys. He doesn’t totally leave, he stays close enough. But it isn’t the same.

And oh, his boys were desperate for their father to love them so Dick allows it. Tentatively, and with a watchful eye, but he lets it happen.

Because thats what Bruce needs too and as long as the boys are no longer being hurt by him? Once it seems that Bruce is genuinely changing? Well. Dick will always sacrifice his emotional needs for the rest of them. Because he will always do whatever it takes to regulate Bruce, and protect his boys. Even if it breaks him.

you know that thing that’s like. your mom controls the mood in whole house, so like when she’s mad, it’s a bad day for everyone?

do you think the batkids have that with bruce?

i’m usually the biggest champion of “let bruce be a good and thereby emotionally heathy dad” but speaking semi-realistically:

do you think that bruce, out of the cowl, is so emotionally volatile that he creates the vibe for the whole house?

do you think tim would text jason and be like “not a good day don’t come by” just to spare himself and everyone else from bruce blowing up on someone

do you think damian breathes a sigh of relief whenever he wakes up and bruce is in a good mood because it means he can relax

and that bruce still doesn’t notice that on his worst days, everyone either avoids him or does whatever he asks, no questions, just because they don’t want to tempt his wrath

i just wonder if bruce sets the tone for the day, no matter what. and i wonder if, like me, they all grew up knowing that a bad day for bruce was a bad day for them too?

[hyunrun]

my dad is so cute he saw me struggling w psych exam prep and I'm gonna do psych in uni so he sat me down and let me know that I can change my mind any time :( and that he'll support me even if I decide I wanna scrap my degree and do something else as long as I put my full conviction and effort towards it

[sunriseovergotham]

i can't fall asleep why can't i fall aslepe just let me fucking fall asleep just let me go back to bed why wont you fukcig let me sleep

[therapythoughtstogether]

I'm kind of the opposite. Therapy is the only space I have iRL where I can express my full range of emotions and I know that I won't be judged. I appreciate my therapist for creating that safe space.