#EXTREMELY LONG BITCHING SESSION:
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im still thinking about this post!!

i said id do a post of my thoughts about this but between red and white london but never got round to it lmao so here goes
its a ramble friends,
essentially the idea that the middle finger is something that both sides share absolutely DELIGHTS me. to start with both sides would be a little unsure, curious yes, but a sort of morbid curiosity from the red side that wonder what these people live like, who bind their magic to their skin in such a way (especially those who have seen holland and wonder what world could've made someone so unsettling and so Other) the white side would have a certain curiosity but its suppressdd by a layer of hatred and disgust at the world that left them to suffer.
to start with, no amount of mouthing words, signing with hands, and writing signs could get across any messages, until the first middle finger was shown... it doesn't matter who flipped it first but rather the unbridled joy as the other side respoded in kind, that not only do they have such a gesture in common but it also translates directly...
from there it would be the children who would truly bridge the gap, even children in white london have a small measure of innocent curiosity before the world gets in. It would be a group of children on either side gathering to sate their fascination, a red london boy gazing up to see a white london man smoking char, who notices his audience and wiggles his fingers to turn the smoke into the shape of an animal, the young boy is reminded of his grandad who did the exact same thing to entertain him before his passing. a white london woman holds her baby up to the window and the red londoner on the other side doesnt need to hear her voice or understand her language to know she is telling her child look "what do you see?" in the same tone that they spoke to their own child many years ago. the curious delight on the baby's face is so achingly familiar.
then people would start to open up, people would dance, play charades, teach each other things, try to get messages across utilising the full scope of human creativity. red londoners would learn not to give demonstrations of magic, but they would start to understand the pain of the people their ancestors left behind. people would show each other things from their worlds trying to find ways that they are similar rather than different.
one day kell walks by on the white london side on his way to deliver a message to the danes, the people in red london explode into frantic glee seeing one of their own on the other side, a beacon of colour in a pale scene. the people on the white side call him over and all he can do is give a bewildered wave before making his excuses. he can hear music as he walks away. the white londoners were showing off a popular dance, and would later try to teach it through the window despite having no way of showing the red world what the music is meant to sound like... kell approaches holland the next day to pose the idea of giving the window an audio link too, "just a short while so they can share their music too", they are stood on the red side when he asks, they are watching two teenage boys trying to teach each other coin tricks, the boy on the white side notices holland and signs frantically "please tell him sir, that my name is mikhail" holland nods to kell, then turns back to the boys and their coins to deliver this message.
kell watches the joy lighting their faces, the bond growing between two people who will never meet, never can meet, and thinks, perhaps this was a cruel idea after all.
#adsom#shades of magic#holland vosijk#kell maresh#white london#red london#adsom ramble#that was a fucking essay my dudes#long post#ive thought about it very frequently but just never put it all down#kell comes to talk to holland about window stuff and he does Not like that#for the record i think kell would be extremely skeptical about the window as he thinks it would be a cruel idea#to give that view into a world they cant reach especially as it wouldnt be permanent#holland hates the idea despite the small joy it brings some in his world#obviously it wasnt either antaris ideas they were just forced to make it for their respective monarchs#and had a rare moment of mutual agreement on the matter and an even rarer mutual bitching session about how much of a bad idea it was#hope u enjoyed what was essentially a short fanfic#it really has been turning in my brain so long
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Imagine: you suddenly got the urge to just suck your lover's tits because they just looked suckable
Top!characterxbottom!mr
Imagine you just finished your lovemaking session with your lover, wanting to get up and finally wash yourself but that was a hard task because you were still impaled on your lover's cock
Imagine feeling slightly aroused because the man under you was constantly shifting and the cock inside you was still twitching!
Imagine you desperately wanted to ride and get revenge on the man for going so roughly after he promised he'll be gentle! having nothing to do, you just observed the man who luckily got you— observing his hair, his long eyelashes, the mole's littered across his neck and.. his man tits- this was your chance!
Imagine your hands slightly crawling up his chest and with just one squeeze- it almost made you clench on the sleeping guy's impaled dick in you! you just couldn't help it! it was so soft, warm and squishyy
Imagine after you played around with the sleeping male's tits, you slowly yet surely sucked on his nipple with the other hand groping and pinching the other- you were having the time of your life! thinking what would be this male's reaction when you suck on his nipples while he's awake? it sure did make you feel aroused- you started grinding down the sleeping guy's cock and your sucking on his nipples roughly progressed!
Imagine when you were unaware of the awoken male, just struggling to hold in his grunts. He looked shocked and amazed because of your audacity to even think of doing this, even taking advantage of him sleeping! watching how you grinded down his dick, massaging and eating his chest like it was your first meal of the day!
Imagine when you were having the time of your life, a hand gripped your arse- and boy did it make your heart fall outa your ass and that means either stop or there'll be no sleeping for you
you're a smart good boy so of course, you chose tits
Imagine where you were turned over and in full nelson position! the male wasted no time and immediately started pounding into you, still having not recovered from the past session made you extremely sensitive! each vein and each touch of his made you closer to cumming! these overwhelming sensations were making you slowly lose your mind
Imagine that however you try to beg for him to slow down, he just wouldn't listen and instead do the opposite!!
"how do you- mmh.. like that huh? just a while ago it seemed like you were..ngh- don't tighten up too much, bitch-" he paused and ceased his thrusts, readjusting you so whenever he thrusts, it immediately hits your prostrate on point! and did it make you see stars so fast, each thrust did truly hit your spot, on point! it was definitely making you go crazy! each thrust got rougher that it felt like your insides were being scraped off as his cock retracts! you couldn't deny the leg shaking pleasure tho, might just beg the male to do this kind of treatment again..well maybe..
"just- ngh! slOw down..please!" you begged, grabbing his arm to atleast ground yourself from the rough treatment, he answered your beg by simply tightening up his grip on your neck and again, feverishly thrusted up your abused and puffy hole, oh he wish that he could see each and every reaction of yours, but no matter tho, your twitching, whimpers, and moans proved that you were experiencing lots of pleasure like what he does! shookt out of his thoughts, he felt your hand slowly loosing it's grip and he remembered, he was still choking you!
after redeeming your oxygen back, everything was now heightened, his soft grunts and the squelching got more louder and it just added more into your pleasure! your drool and tears were continuously dripping down, your eyes felt like they would pop out of your skull just from how much they've rolled back! you definitely thought that this might be your last fuck cuz boy was this man suffocating you in pleasure! his thrusting never ceased but delivered a question by tapping your thigh, asking if you're good, feeling more naughty than ever, you just clenched tightly around the thick girth and were you rewarded by a loud grunt and a gush of hot, warm liquid inside you! it took the male to awhile finish up, it was like he was cumming rivers in you!
Pulling out his now soft cock, he swiped his hair back and looked down at you and he was greeted with a damned sight-
"That's all you got?..that was kinda lame don't you think?" you said mischievously while slyly grabbing your cheeks and presenting him, your abused boy pussy
Without a minute his dick sprang back in its full glory! hearing an amused chuckled "How i still wonder who's much more deranged than i am" he said while giving your lips a quick peck and joined you two, together once more..
Imagine that you got pounded so extremely hard that you were covered in cum, spit, sweat and tears! up still now, the sun is already shining but this asshole wouldn't let you go! you already learned your lesson as to not provoke this dude, ever.
Imagine when you woke up, you're wrapped up in the most fluffiest blanket ever!-but the heavy arm wrapped around you, ruined your mood because you remembered what happened last night! that asshole didn't even stop from how much you've passed out! but..you would't admit that you definitely have a thing for that kind of treatment now..
☆: this was inspired from a fic I've read in wattpad before and i forgot who made the fic but dang got reminded cuz i saw sum man tits last night so yeah-also, i was supposed to upload this last night but my annoying ah flu wouldn't let me, so yeah, hope you enjoyed! please request!! and have an awesome day!
Taglists☆
@darlingminjin @kikizhly
#bottom male reader#uke male reader#male x male#top male character#xukemalereader#ysevmakesimmagines
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The Shen Qingqiu who is kidnapped by Bingge in the post Bingge vs. Bingmei, then Shen Qingqiu decides: "oh, okay. You want me, you'll have me, you little shit."
And he turns into the absolute troll. He takes all he can out of being little shit on the internet, his spoiled rich kid days, scathing criticism. He even abandons the appearance of an elegant immortal master, he turns into chaos and a pain in the ass for Luo Bingge.
He gives women's liberation speeches to the harem wives, and more than half of them file for divorce, convinced that their marriages were a legal sham. He brings chaotic monsters to the inner garden saying they are harmless puppies (for Shen Qingqiu they are!!!) and spends coffers and coffers of gold paying servants to do things like learn modern songs and play them randomly in the demon court, or just spending it on little things that he's clearly getting ripped off on purpose.
He even argues with Bingge himself !! about his marital decisions, how disgusting Xin Mo is, his horrible taste in decorations, that can't solve everything with sex and blood. Strategy!!! Wasn't he at the peak of strategists for a reason!??
He also turns into a spoiled bitch. He demands extremely specific meals that must be made by Bingge, takes two bites, and (lies) that his Bingmei's meals are better. He demands to have fans made of a specific, very expensive material only to beat Bingge with them until they are ruined every time he does something Shen Qingqiu doesn't like. The finest silks in his robes, which also end up ruined when he runs through the gardens after short-haired beasts. The best jewels of the crown arrangement... For Shen Qingqiu to use to break the beads and play with them inside a cloth bag as a "stress reliever".
He intervenes in sessions of the demonic court, devastates everyone with hostile comments, humiliates and insults everyone. He's more of a bitch than cruel, slightly sinister, excessively spoiled. Ha!! As if Bingge could stand that. He'll give it back as soon as he loses enough patience!!
...
... Contrary to Shen Qingqiu's plans to completely scare away Luo Bingge, everything he does, the chaos he becomes, the headache he definitely is, only makes Luo Bingge wants him more.
When Bingmei comes to rescue him with a reforged Xin Mo and a lot of anger, Bingge comes to him and says: "How do you deal with all his whims? How do you keep him entertained without him getting bored and causing chaos? You can't really do it alone!!! I'll come with you and help to please Shizun!!!"
Bingmei has no idea what whims thing his counterpart is talking about. As Bingge further begins to tell him (with absolute fascination) all the things that kind Shizun has done, how he has behaved... Oh boy, Bingmei is SO jealous!!
How come he hasn't had the chance to see him like this!? How his Shizun, his beloved, doesn't allow him to see that side of him!?
And Bingge, that awful, shitty imposter!!! That enormous privilege of spoiled Shizun only should be his!!! Bingmei takes a deep breath, and, determined to make a deal with the devil if necessary, decides he needs to see his Shizun be a brat.
... Then maybe he can act a little like... Bingge. Just for a little while. Just to watch Shizun like this until he realizes he would come to rescue him. Bingge allows him to pretend to be himself on the condition that Bingmei allows him to visit their Shizun in their own world... Just to spoil him.
Bingmei chews over the option and reluctantly accepts it, as long as he doesn't try to kiss or touch his Shizun ("without his consent" Bingge insists. "If Shizun asks for it, this one will do it.")
So, Bingmei just... behaves like Bingge. He wears half gloves to hide the scar on his hand, and approaches Shizun only to be treated like a little shit, mocked, criticized and watch Shizun run after a wild thunder bird of prey, offering... Rats? Shizun is holding dead rats with his bare hands!? Walking barefoot on the grass!? And he is so free, so loose, so little from the distant immortal master that Bingmei has to escape so as not to fall on his knees, hug him and cry.
He'll definitely make his Shizun feel that free with him too, damn imposter who somehow got there first!!! And Bingge just watches him collapse, gives him a pat on the back and a look that is, simply and foolishly, his own.
Obsessed with Shizun. Adoring him. Wanting to please him. Wanting to fulfill his whims, allowing him everything, accepting everything for him. His word is law and his decision is truth. If Shizun strikes, it's a pleasure; if Shizun insults, it's a gift. Because Shizun also can't help being sweet, kind, concerned, and because they've both fallen so hard that Bingmei can't even get angry. Which version of him wouldn't fall to his Shizun, is the real question?
They'll spoil Shizun. And Bingmei will find a way for his Shizun to be that free even with him. And he will get that!! No matter what he has to do about it! Even if he has to keep pretending to be the imposter Bingge until he learn what made Shizun break free so much, he'll have the freedom from Shizun to be as critical and spoiled as he deserves!!!
#svsss#svsss au#svsss ideas#bingqiu#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#original luo binghe#scum villain self saving system#post bingge vs bingmei#the kidnapped shen qingqiu (for a silly bingge)#bingge and bingmei sharing having been wifebeamed by shen qingqiu#shen qingqiu is just being a spoiled brat#to irritate and annoy#and ends up conquering two great m#poor shizun he doesn't know what's coming#bingge and bingmei working together for the greater good#(the greater good: spoil shizun)#possible polyamory? we'll see
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could you do a long smut where Jude and Reader are dating and she's just extremely innocent and that turns Jude on, but at the same time he wants to corrupt her, he wants to protect her innocence. The reader sits on his lap or is always wearing short clothes (as she is inside the house) and he can't take it anymore... one time, they are kissing and Jude loses control, he gets on top of her and kisses her with desire and So she's all confused because she feels strange, like she's never felt before and she wants more, but Jude gets off her right away and he's so hard and the reader can't help but watch that with curiosity... they don't They talk about Aquil, but as the days go by, she notices that he doesn't want to kiss her and always pushes her away and this makes her sad and she decides to talk to him about it... he is frank with her saying that she is extremely innocent and that the things he wants to do to her have destroyed her innocence; She says she trusts him and wants to go all the way with him (even though she doesn't know exactly what to do) and then Jude takes her virginity, being extremely careful and always asking if she's sure. Reader stares in fascination upon seeing him naked for the first time and Jude can't help but be enchanted by how adorable she is. She had never felt that way, Jude's hands are all over her body and when Jude enters her, no matter how much it hurts, it makes her feel so good (please could you put dirty talk in that, I'm just a bitch about Jude being naughty and talking dirty)
I finally did it! After two weeks of writing, I’ve finished this project! This is the longest fic I’ve ever written, and I poured my heart into it as an apology for my long absence. If you notice any repeated scenes… well, that’s because I wrote this over two weeks, and my memory is about as reliable as a goldfish’s. Plus, I was way too tired to edit. I tried to stick to the request as much as I could but my imagination got carried away.
-Much love, Bianca 🌻
Inocencia
Masterlist
𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 ��� In which you and Jude are soulmates.
𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 — Jude Bellingham x you
𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 — 24.2k
Warnings! FLUFF! Jude is so soft with her, he's so in love, insecurities, first love, established relationship, this is the softest thing I've ever written, slight angst for the plot (nothing serious), NSFW! SMUT (18+), corruption kink, virgin reader, first time, unprotected vaginal sex, oral sex (f & m receiving), fingering, soft sex, multiple orgasms, dom!Jude, sub!reader, a little surprise at the end for y'all
Growing up, your life wasn’t just structured; it was scripted.
A carefully choreographed routine, every step dictated by expectations you had no hand in setting.
Your parents didn’t ask for much, just obedience, and you learned quickly that nodding and murmuring yes was easier than explaining the no lodged in your throat. Childhood wasn’t about exploration; it was about perfection. Whims were traded for polished manners, because mistakes were lessons learned the hard way.
Mornings began with perfectly made beds and meticulously crafted schedules, while evenings were reserved for review sessions of tests you wouldn’t take for weeks. Every minute of the day was accounted for, leaving little room for anything but perfection.
So you became a master of disguise.
The messy, loud, imperfect parts of you? Those were hidden away, locked behind a wall of politeness and precision. You never thought to question it. This was life, wasn’t it?
At school, the contrast was striking.
Your classmates had lives that seemed so chaotic, so mesmerisingly beautiful. At least to you. You dreamed of being like them. Of joining the dance team, of skipping class, of reading books that your mother didn't pick out for you.
They had the kind of freedom you couldn’t fathom. They whispered about parties that ended at sunrise, secret crushes, first kisses stolen under streetlights. You listened, fascinated but silent. Rules first, fun later.
But "later" had a funny way of never showing up.
And then came Charlie.
You first met her on orientation day, a whirlwind of awkward introductions and icebreakers that felt anything but natural. Later, you discovered she was your roommate.
At first, you weren’t sure what to make of her. Charlie was… a lot.
At first glance, she seemed like someone you might not click with—her energy almost too big for the room, her laugh too loud for the small spaces you preferred to inhabit. But Charlie wasn’t the kind of person you could easily dismiss. She had a way of pulling you into her orbit before you even realized it.
She was the type to breathe chaos into order, and somehow, it felt exhilarating instead of terrifying.
Her hair was perpetually tousled, like she’d just stepped out of a convertible, and her eyeliner was smudged in a way that teetered between effortlessly cool and slightly rebellious. Charlie didn’t believe in plans or schedules. She just lived.
And that scared you as much as it fascinated you.
Charlie’s world was the opposite of yours. Plans? Schedules? Those were foreign concepts to her. She moved through life with a kind of chaotic grace, unburdened by rules or the need to please anyone. It wasn’t just her confidence that drew you in; it was her freedom, the way she seemed to exist without fear of judgment.
So when she begged—insisted—you come to her boyfriend’s birthday party, you barely had time to think up an excuse. “It’s downtown,” she said, practically vibrating with excitement. “You never go downtown. You’ll love it. Or hate it. But at least you’ll survive it. Please?”
You hesitated, of course. Clubs weren’t your thing. Loud music, strangers, flashing lights—it sounded like a nightmare. But Charlie had this way of pulling you out of your shell with sheer force of will.
And that’s how you ended up there.
The nightclub was chaos incarnate.
The music wasn’t just loud—it was alive, a relentless bassline that seemed to sync with your heartbeat and vibrate in your throat. The air was thick with perfume, cologne, sweat, and the faint tang of spilled drinks. Lights pulsed like strobes, casting sharp shadows and brilliant flashes over the crowd.
You clung to the drink Charlie had handed you—something neon pink and overly sweet—sticking to the edge of the dance floor, hoping to blend into the wallpaper. But, alas.
“Having Fun!” She had shouted over the music when she found you a half-hour later. Her smile was wide, her cheeks flushed from dancing.
“Yeah!” you’d shouted back, though you were far from it. Your feet ached from heels you regretted wearing the moment you stepped outside, and your head throbbed from the bassline that seemed to shake the very floor.
Charlie didn’t buy it, but she didn’t press. She just grinned and teased, “Loosen up! We're here to partayyyy!” before spinning back into the crowd.
Loosening up was easier said than done.
You stayed, partly out of stubbornness and partly because she’d promised burgers afterward. But the crowd didn’t get any less overwhelming, and the bass didn’t grow any quieter. Soon enough, the drinks you’d nervously sipped started making demands on your bladder.
Navigating the club was its own kind of ordeal, like threading a needle through a sea of moving bodies. By the time you reached the bathroom line, you were convinced the club had been designed by sadists who enjoyed watching people suffer in heels.
And that’s when you met him.
You were half-distracted, balancing your drink in one hand while trying to make your way through the packed hallway without spilling it. Your friends had already disappeared into the crowd, and you were craning your neck, trying to spot them, when you took the corner too sharply.
It happened fast. A solid wall—or at least that’s what it felt like—stopped you in your tracks. Your drink, the bright, sticky concoction it was, jumped out of your cup, splattering the pristine white shirt in front of you.
“Ah, no!” you yelped, realizing what you’d done as you stumbled back a step. The sound of your drink hitting fabric was followed by an awkward silence.
Your eyes shot up, wide with panic. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” The words tumbled out before you could think, your heart pounding like it might leap out of your chest.
The guy blinked, looking down at his now-ruined shirt, then back at you. For a split second, you braced yourself for anger, irritation, or some sharp comment that would make the whole situation worse. Like you were so used to. Your head instinctively bent, ready for the scolding you were sure you'd get.
But instead, he laughed—short and low but unmistakable.
“Guess I shouldn’t have worn white, huh?” he said, his accent soft, the words rolling off his tongue like he found the whole thing funny.
You blinked, caught off guard by his reaction. “I—uh—wait, let me—” You spun around, spotting a table nearby and snatching up a handful of napkins. Your hands were shaking as you turned back to him. Memories of fists and broken plates and your fault, your fault danced in the corners of your mind.
You pushed them away.
The napkins were gone before you knew it, your fingers flying over his shirt, trying to mop up the pink liquid. His brows furrowing in concern as he watched your panicked motions, but when he reached out to touch your wrist, you flinched.
“Hey,” he said gently, “it’s okay.” And you had to force yourself to relax into his grip. “Look, why don’t I go clean up in the bathroom real quick, and you can take a deep breath. I’m sure we can get the stain out.”
He stepped away, and you could feel your breath return in increments, your heartbeat slowing as he spoke. Your gaze followed him, watching the way his shoulders moved under the white fabric, now blotched with pink. He disappeared down the hallway, leaving you standing there, clutching a pile of sticky napkins, cheeks burning with embarrassment.
You wanted to melt into the floor, vanish into the neon lights and pounding music. Instead, you took a deep breath, like he’d suggested, and tried to shake off the lingering panic.
When he came back, his shirt was damp but clean enough, a faint pink stain barely visible. “See?” he said, grinning as he gestured to his shirt. “No harm done.”
You managed a small smile. “I’m still really sorry. I wasn’t paying attention.”
He shrugged, the movement easy, as if he genuinely didn’t care. “It happens. You okay?”
The question caught you off guard. “Me? Yeah, I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”
He tilted his head, studying you for a moment. “I dunno. Just… you looked kinda spooked back there.”
“Nah, I was just worried about your shirt is all.” You could feel your cheeks start to flush, a mix of embarrassment and self-consciousness. “I didn’t mean to ruin it. I'm sorry.”
He grinned. “I told, it's cool. How about this,” He gestured toward the bar, where a long line snaked out into the crowded hallway, before continuing. “Next drink is on me. You game?”
You hesitated for a split second. This was the part where you should say no, walk away and find Charlie or the bathroom. This was the part where your mom would warn you against talking to strangers. And then you’d go back to your normal, structured life and forget the whole incident.
But something about him made you pause.
For some weird reason, you felt safe with him, which was strange because he was still a stranger. But then again, that’s life, right? Making mistakes? Learning by them? Trying things and seeing if they work out or not? Maybe it was time to do that.
Maybe it was time to try.
So you nodded. “Yeah.”
*******
Eight months. That’s how long it’s been, and somehow, he’s still just as captivating as the first day. Maybe even more so.
You’ve never felt anything like this before—not with anyone. The way Jude looks at you, the way he listens when you speak, it’s like he sees through the layers you’ve spent years building up. Sometimes, it’s unnerving, how easily he seems to read you, like your thoughts aren’t secrets at all, but something written in a language only he understands.
He’s everything you never thought you’d find in someone—charming in a way that feels effortless, patient when the shadows of your past make you falter, and protective in a way that doesn’t smother but shields.
It’s in the way he holds doors open without making it a spectacle, or the way his hand hovers near yours, like he’s waiting for you to reach out, to let him in. He never forces, never pushes—just waits.
And when you finally let him, it’s like coming home to something you never knew you needed.
He makes you feel precious, in a way that’s unfamiliar. His touch is careful, his words thoughtful. He treats you like something rare, something fragile—not because he thinks you’re weak, but because he doesn’t want to be the one to hurt you.
And that’s a feeling you never thought you’d know.
Not after growing up in a house where fists spoke louder than words, where anger lived in every corner. Where the man who should’ve been your protector was your first lesson in betrayal.
For so long, that was all you knew. Rage masquerading as love. Pain disguised as discipline. You’d convinced yourself that was all there was, that kindness and warmth were things meant for other people, not you.
But then Jude came along. And with him, the impossible became real.
He showed you that there are more ways to love than hurt. That there are words that could comfort instead of cut, that there were hands that could hold instead of slap. That maybe—just maybe—you deserved more than what you’d gotten.
He tells you things that make you feel like a goddess, a queen, a princess. That you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. That he could stare at you all day and never get tired of it. That he’s falling in love with you, and every word makes you fall even more in love with him too.
He calls you his princess, and it doesn’t make you cringe like you think it would.
You like it.
You love him.
********
The shrill buzz of your phone pulls you from your lecture notes, dragging your attention away from the professor’s voice. You squint at the screen, the light stark against the dimmed classroom. A text from Jude lits up your screen: “I’m outside.”
Your stomach flutters, a small smile creeping onto your lips. Quickly, you tap out a reply, “Coming” before stuffing your phone back into your bag.
The professor's voice drones on, giving out last-minute details about the upcoming assignment, but your focus has already shifted. You glance at the clock, your heart ticking a beat faster. With a whispered "thank you" as class concluded, you gather your belongings in a blur of movement, slinging your bag over your shoulder as you make your way to the exit.
The crisp air outside greets you, a welcome contrast to the stuffy classroom. It doesn't take long to spot him.
Jude leans casually against his car parked by the curb, his hoodie slightly wrinkled and joggers hanging just right. The late afternoon sun catches on the strands of his messy coils, highlighting the slight curve of his lips as he catches sight of you.
“Hey,” he calls, his voice carrying over the hum of campus life. He doesn't move at first, just stands there watching you, a playful glint in his eyes that make your cheeks warm.
You wave, suddenly hyperaware of the way your bag bounces against your side as you walk. By the time you reach him, his smile has softened into something warm and familiar, and before you can say a word, he reaches out, opening the passenger door with a fluid motion.
“You’re late,” he teases, though the way he leans forward to press a quick, soft kiss to your lips told a different story.
"Am not,” you reply, your voice mock-indignant as you slip into the seat.
Jude chuckles, closing the door behind you before circling around to the driver’s side. Once he slides in, he immediately reaches for your seatbelt, the motion so casual it makes your heart skip. His fingers brushes lightly against your arm as he clicks the buckle into place. It's such a small gesture, but it carries a kind of intimacy that leaves you momentarily breathless.
“Safe and sound,” he murmurs, sitting back and adjusting his grip on the steering wheel. His gaze flickers over to you, lingering for just a second longer than necessary. “You good?”
You nod, still caught in the warmth of his attention. “Yeah. You?”
“I’m better now,” he says, flashing a grin that is so unfairly charming it should be illegal. He starts the car, the low hum of the engine blending with the soft music playing from the speakers. “Hungry?”
You tilt your head, pretending to think. “Hmm. Is that a trick question?”
Jude huffs, his smirk faltering. “Smartass.”
“Yup,” you agree, grinning back.
He shoots you a look—playfully annoyed but still affectionate—and you giggle in response. It’s the kind of thing that happens so easily between the two of you—a sense of banter that doesn’t feel like fighting, just friendly sparring. It took a while for you to get used to them.
“I can cook tonight,” you offer, reaching for your phone as he eases out into traffic. “What do you want?”
He shrugs. “Whatever you want, babe.”
“Okay,” you murmur, scrolling through your messages to pull up Charlie's last text. You’d asked her if she was staying over at her boyfriend's, and she’d replied with a thumbs-up and a string of hearts. A smile crosses your lips as you tuck the phone away.
“We've got the apartment to ourselves tonight,” you say, settling back into your seat and gazing out the window. “If you still wanna come over, that is. I can make you dinner.”
Jude's smile turns languid. “You know I do, princess. I’m always up for food at your place.”
“Okay,” you murmur turning to look at the passing scene as the corners of his mouth quirk even higher.
*********
The apartment feels quieter than usual without Charlie.
Not in an uncomfortable way—just different. Her energy always filled the space, a constant buzz of chatter, music, and the occasional burst of laughter that never failed to make you smile. Without her, the silence feels oddly still, like the apartment itself is taking a deep breath.
You emerge from the bathroom wrapped in your fluffy pink robe, the one Charlie always teases you about but secretly adores. Your hair is slightly damp from your shower, loose strands sticking to your neck. The cool air from the air-conditioning brushes over your skin, and you shiver slightly as you step into the living room.
Jude is exactly where you left him, sprawled on the couch like he owns the place, phone balanced precariously on his knee.
His brows are drawn together in concentration, and his thumbs fly over the screen at a speed that seems almost superhuman. He’s clearly playing some game, utterly absorbed in whatever digital battlefield he’s dominating.
You tread softly across the room, the plush carpet muffling your footsteps. He doesn’t even glance up, so focused that he doesn’t notice you until you’re right in front of him. When you settle onto the couch beside him, the cushion dips under your weight, and only then does he stir.
“Hey, baby,” he murmurs, his voice warm and slightly distracted. His arm snakes around your waist without hesitation, pulling you into his side. His eyes stay glued to his screen, but his lips find the top of your head in a lazy, affectionate kiss that makes your heart flutter.
“Hi,” you reply, your voice soft as you lean into him. His embrace is as familiar as it is comforting, the warmth wrapping around you and sinking into your bones. He smells like fresh laundry and that woodsy cologne he always wears, the one that lingers on your clothes long after he’s gone.
For a moment, you just sit there, tucked against him as he plays.
His body is solid, a loving strength that you’ve come to rely on without even realizing it. You let out a contented sigh, your cheek resting against his shoulder. Jude glances at you briefly, his lips quirking into a small smile as he presses another kiss to your temple.
“You smell so good, baby. Like strawberries,” he remarks, his tone teasing but fond.
“It’s my shampoo,” you mumble, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks. His ability to fluster you with the simplest comments is as maddening as it is endearing to him.
“Smells good.” He pauses his game just long enough to tilt his head down, his nose brushing against your damp hair. “Smells like you.”
You bite your lip, the corners of your mouth twitching upward despite yourself. His charm is relentless, and even when he’s trying to be casual, it lands like a full-force assault on your heart.
For a while, the room settles into a comfortable silence.
Jude’s arm stays around you, holding you close as he continues indulging in whatever virtual madness is happening on his phone. You don’t mind.
The warmth of his body against yours, the faint clicking of his fingers against the screen, and the soft hum of the air conditioner create a soothing melody, lulling you to sleep. And for a second you forget about deadlines and responsibilities, if only for a little while.
But eventually, the nagging thought of midterms creeps back in, pulling you away from the comfort of Jude’s arm draped lazily around your shoulders. You shift slightly, sighing as reality nudges its way back in. “I should study,” you mumble reluctantly, already regretting the words as they leave your mouth. “Midterms are coming up, and I need to get a head start.”
Jude freezes mid-controller click, his focus snapping to you with a speed that’s almost comical. His brows knit together in concern as he sets the controller down and turns to you fully. “Do you need help?” he offers, his voice warm, eager, and so earnest it makes your chest ache. He sits up straighter, reluctantly moving his arm so you can wiggle free if you want to. “I could quiz you or something.”
The way his brown eyes lock onto yours tugs at you. For a fleeting moment, you consider saying yes—just to keep him close a little longer. His enthusiasm, the little crease of worry between his brows, all of it makes you want to say yes. But you’ve been here before.
You bite back a smile and shake your head. “You know how it goes when you help me study.”
“What?” His face splits into a boyish grin. “I’m great at helping.”
“You get bored,” you counter, raising an eyebrow at him.
His grin widens, the mischief in his eyes almost tangible. “I don’t get bored. I keep things interesting.”
“Interesting?” You scoff lightly, though your lips twitch at the corners. “You mean you start distracting me.”
“Distractions are good for you," he says, leaning in closer. His voice dips into that flirty tone that always seems to weaken your resolve. “Keeps your brain from overheating.”
You try to hold firm, crossing your arms as you fight the smile threatening to bloom. “Distractions,” you repeat, deadpan, “like kissing me every five minutes?”
“Only every five minutes?” he teases, his lips quirking upward. “I’m slacking. I’ll make it every two.”
You groan, covering your face with your hands as your cheeks flare with heat. “Jude, stop.”
“Why?” he murmurs, lowering his voice as he leans closer, his hand slipping over yours to gently tug them away from your face. “You’re cute when you get flustered.”
You feel your heart do a little somersault as he takes your hand, his thumb tracing slow, lazy circles over your knuckles. His touch is maddeningly gentle, and his gaze is soft yet playful. “Come on, let me stay. I promise I’ll behave this time. Swear on… well, on your favorite pen or something.”
“You said that last time,” you remind him, though your voice lacks the conviction you want it to have.
“And I meant it," he says with exaggerated sincerity. “But then you started doing that thing where you chew on your pen and look all smart and adorable. What’s a guy supposed to do?”
“Focus,” you say firmly, though your lips betray you by curving into a reluctant smile.
He chuckles, the sound low and rich, sending a little flutter through you. “Alright, alright. I’ll leave you to it.” He raises his hands in mock surrender, though his grin tells you he’s far from serious.
True to his word, he pulls himself away from you, standing and stretching lazily before grabbing his phone. But before he leaves, he leans down, brushing his lips against your forehead in a kiss so soft and lingering that it leaves you momentarily breathless.
“Good luck, baby,” he murmurs, his voice warm and sweet. “You’ve got this.”
The soft click of the door closing behind him echoes in the quiet room, and you let out a long breath, trying to steady the racing of your heart. Even now, minutes after he’s left, his presence lingers—his touch, his whispers, his look that leaves you feeling shy and disarmed.
You force yourself to turn back to your notes, determined to focus on the task at hand. For sixty blessed minutes, you manage to keep your head down and concentrate, letting the scratch of your pen on paper drown out the memory of his teasing grin.
But, as if summoned by your thoughts, he slips back into your space without so much as a sound. You only notice him when you feel the featherlight brush of his lips against the curve of your neck. A startled gasp escapes you, and your pen stills in your hand as his warm breath fans over your skin.
“How’s the studying going?” he murmurs, his voice low and laced with playful mischief.
Your pulse quickens, and you try to muster some semblance of composure. “Jude,” you whisper, his name barely audible as your voice falters at his closeness.
“Hmm?” He hums, the sound rumbling softly against your skin as his hands settle on your waist, fingers toying idly with the hem of your pajama top.
“You’re distracting me,” you manage, though the tremble in your voice betrays your lack of conviction. You're a little thankful for the break he's forcing you to take.
“Am I?” he asks innocently, slipping his hand ever so slightly under your top, his lips now brushing the sensitive spot just below your ear. You can feel the curve of his grin, knowing he’s completely aware of the effect he has on you.
You grip your pen tighter, clinging to the pretense of focus, but the heat of his palm against your skin and the teasing lilt of his voice unravel you piece by piece. Desperate for some distance, you push his chest gently, your face flaming as you turn to face him. “I’m going to cook dinner,” you declare, your tone firmer this time, though your skin betray you, burning with an unmistakable flush.
His brow arches, and for a moment, you think he might relent. But as you make your way to the kitchen, his footsteps trail right behind yours.
“You don’t give up, do you?” you ask, glancing over your shoulder, though the teasing lilt in your voice takes the sting out of the words.
“Not when it comes to you,” he replies smoothly, his grin utterly shameless as he catches up.
Once in the kitchen, you busy yourself with pulling out ingredients, determined to create a barrier between you and his relentless touching. But Jude, being Jude, is relentless in his own way. He's being very clingy today, more than usual.
As you start chopping vegetables, he edges closer, his chin coming to rest on your shoulder. His arms snake around your waist, pulling you back just slightly against his chest.
“Jude,” you warn, your voice firmer this time as you wave the knife in a small arc in his direction.
“Dangerous,” he quips, leaning back just enough to dodge your playful swat, though he’s far from deterred. “You’re cute when you’re dangerous.”
Your lips twitch despite yourself, and you let out an exasperated sigh. “You’re impossible,” you mutter, shaking your head as you try to focus on the task at hand.
He chuckles, a low, warm sound that sends shivers dancing down your spine. “Are you sure?” he teases, pressing a soft kiss to your shoulder before leaning in to whisper, “But you love it.”
“I do not,” you retort automatically, though your voice lacks any real heat.
“Liar,” he teases, and you can hear the grin in his voice even without looking.
You spin around, your cheeks warm as you glare at him—or at least try to. “I need to finish dinner. Either help or sit down.”
He raises his hands in mock surrender, though there’s no hiding the amusement in his expression. “Alright, alright. What do you need me to do, boss?”
You hand him a carrot, your lips quirking into a small smile despite yourself. “Peel this. And don’t distract me.”
“Can’t make any promises,” he says with a wink, but he takes the carrot anyway, grabbing a peeler from the drawer next to you.
For a few minutes, there’s an ease of peace as the two of you work side by side. He whistles softly under his breath as he peels glancing at you every now and then, and you chop in rhythm, the sounds of the kitchen filling the space. It feels so incredibly domestic and your thoughts start to drift to a future that you don't often dare to dream.
Is this what he would be like if we're married? you ask yourself. And deep inside, a part of you aches, and longs to find out.
But then, as you reach for the salt, his hand brushes yours, and you freeze, thoughts scrambling at his touch. He’s quick to close the distance again, his lips grazing the corner of your mouth in a kiss so fleeting you almost think you imagined it.
Your breath catches, and you stare up at him, wide-eyed and utterly flustered.
He smiles, his eyes crinkling at the corners, and for a second, you can’t think of anything to say.
“Jude,” you manage finally, though your voice is embarrassingly breathless.
“Hm?.” His fingers trace lazy patterns over the curve of your hip, sending little shivers through your skin. “You look so good like this,” he murmurs softly, his lips brushing against your hair, making you shiver. “In your little robe, making dinner for me. Fuck.” The last word comes out as a groan, and he buries his face into your neck.
The sensation of his breath against your skin sends a ripple through your body, leaving your muscles soft and weak. You lean into his embrace almost automatically, your palms flattening on the counter to steady yourself.
You can’t help the little gasp that escapes you as he nips at the curve of your neck, the touch sending sparks coursing through you.
You try to catch your breath, your cheeks warming with heat as your thoughts scatter. His hand trails higher up to rest on your stomach, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake, and you bite back a whimper. He’s being too bold, and it’s thrilling and terrifying and so, so good.
“Jude,” you stammer out finally. “We haven’t finished dinner yet.”
“I’ll survive,” he murmurs huskily, his tongue flicking over the sensitive skin behind your ear.
And before you can muster up a protest, he spins you around to face him, his grip firm and demanding on your waist. His lips land against yours without warning, all heat and pressure, and your breath stutters out of you as you cling to him, unable to do anything but hold on.
The kiss turns hot and breathless so fast it leaves you reeling, his tongue sweeping into your mouth in bold strokes that leave you dizzy.
Your lips part in response, inviting him deeper, and he takes you up on the offer with a low groan of pleasure. He presses you into the counter, the kiss so urgent it feels like he needs it to survive. Your skin flushes, your body humming with a need you’ve never known before.
It’s too much. It’s like a wildfire burning out of control, and Jude, Jude, Jude.
You’re not even sure what it is that you’re craving so desperately, but you know it involves him.
And when he pulls away abruptly, it feels like being dunked into an ice bath.
Your head spins, and for a moment, you can’t do anything but stare at him. Your breath is still ragged, your lips tingling, and the intensity of his gaze makes your heart stutter.
It’s dark, unreadable, and you feel like prey caught in the sights of a predator—not in a dangerous way, but in a way that makes you hyperaware of every inch of your body.
Your fingers tighten on the counter behind you, grounding yourself as the silence stretches between you. He looks like he wants to say something, but instead, he steps back completely, dragging a hand over his face in what feels like frustration. The absence of his warmth hits you immediately, leaving you feeling cold, exposed, and a little disoriented.
You lower your gaze, your cheeks burning, unable to meet his eyes. The apartment feels too quiet, too still, and when you finally dare to look up, he’s gone—retreating into the living room with an almost frustratingly casual stride.
Dinner is a blur after that.
You push food around your plate, barely tasting it, too caught up in the memory of his lips on yours, the way he’d kissed you like he couldn’t get enough. It leaves you feeling equal parts flustered and thrilled, and you hate how obvious it must be. Jude, of course, notices. He keeps sneaking glances at you, his smirk growing every time he catches you looking away too quickly or fiddling with the edge of your napkin. But he doesn't say anything.
After dinner, he suggests a movie. You agree, mostly because you don’t trust yourself to say no without stammering, and before you know it, you’re in your room. The lights are dim, the glow of the screen casting soft shadows across the walls. You sit beside him on the bed, your knees tucked up to your chest, trying not to focus on how close he is.
“Relax,” he teases, draping an arm over your shoulder. “I don’t bite. Unless you want me to.”
You swat at him, your face heating up. “Jude!”
He laughs, low and rich, and you feel the sound settle in your chest. “Alright, alright. I’ll behave.”
For a while, you focus on the movie. Or at least, you try to. Jude, apparently, has other plans. Somewhere halfway through the film, he shifts beside you, his arm tightening around your shoulders. You glance at him, confused, only to freeze when his lips brush against the side of your neck.
“Jude,” you whisper, your voice trembling.
“Hmm?” His voice is soft, playful, but there’s a heat to it that makes your stomach flip.
“I’m trying to watch,” you manage, though your resolve wavers as his hand finds your waist, pulling you closer.
“Am I distracting you?” he murmurs, his lips ghosting over your skin.
You nod, your breath hitching, but it only seems to encourage him. His kisses grow more deliberate, his hand sliding up to cradle your face as he tilts your head toward him. The movie is completely forgotten as his lips capture yours, and this time, there’s nothing hesitant about the way he kisses you.
This kiss is different than the one in the kitchen. This kiss is greedy and demanding, the type that makes you forget how to breathe. You melt into him without hesitation, your hand finding its way to his neck as he pulls you onto his lap.
He lets out a low groan that sends shivers down your spine, his hands coming to settle on your thighs. The kiss deepens, becoming something more, until the world narrows down to nothing but him. His touches are hot and firm, his mouth demanding in a way that leaves your head spinning.
It’s overwhelming.
His touch, his scent, the low hum of his voice when he whispers your name—it’s all too much and not enough at the same time. You’re hyperaware of everything: the way his hands skim your sides, the way his thumb brushes against your jaw, the way your own fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt as if anchoring yourself to him.
When a soft sound escapes you—half gasp, half moan—he freezes. His forehead presses against yours, his breathing heavy and uneven. Still lost in the haze of lust he's started to awaken in you, your lips chase his in a desperate pathetic attempt to keep him close, and you whine when he pulls back, the sound embarrassing you to no end.
“Baby,” he murmurs hoarsely, his voice the epitome of need and restraint. “Baby, you need to stop that.”
It’s only when you look up into his eyes that you realize how affected he is. His pupils are blown, his cheeks flushed, his breath quickening as he holds your gaze. The intensity of his eyes makes your stomach clench, but the effect is different this time—different in a way that you can’t quite place.
You stare at him for what feels like an eternity, searching for something, anything, to explain the strange flutter in your stomach.
His expression is unreadable, but as you sit there, chest heaving, thighs squirming restlessly on his lap, you feel something press into your inner thigh and Jude groans again, his head dipping to rest against your shoulder.
A little noise of surprise slips out of you, and before you can look down, he's flipping you over, pinning you to the bed with a groan.
“Fuck, baby. You don’t know how good you feel,” he whispers huskily, pulling back just long enough to let you breathe. The sight of him—so desperate, so needy, and so turned on—leaves you reeling.
Your heart is pounding, your pulse frantic in your ears as your body responds to his proximity. The feeling between your legs grows slick, the sensation almost strange enough to distract you from the weight of him above.
Jude must feel the way your body tenses because his voice drops, taking on a soothing quality that makes your muscles relax against him. “Shhh, baby. It’s alright.” He leans in, his lips trailing down the side of your neck to leave featherlight kisses there. “Relax.”
But the feeling of being pinned between him and the bed is overwhelming, and before he can kiss you again, you shift restlessly, trying to escape. He lets you get away, his hands following the curve of your sides as you sit up, his gaze roving over you hungrily.
Your cheeks heat, and your hands flutter over your stomach as if trying to find a way to hide yourself. “I—” you start, but then you stop, unsure of how to finish the sentence. “I’m sorry.”
The apology slips out of you automatically, though you’re not even entirely sure what you’re apologizing for.
Jude shakes his head, a wry smile tilting his lips upward. “Don’t be sorry,” he murmurs, leaning in to kiss your forehead softly. “I just…” He trails off, shaking his head again, though his smile turns into a smirk. “I want you so bad it’s driving me fucking crazy." His voice drops into a growl, his hands tightening on your thighs, and you gasp softly. "And it's—fuck. It's turning me on so much." He leans down, pressing you against the mattress once again, and your whine is audible.
“Jude…” you whisper, your voice quivering as your hands press against his chest in a weak attempt to create some distance. But your resolve falters when you meet his eyes—stormy and filled with a look that leaves you breathless. Hunger.
“Yes, baby?,” he murmurs huskily.
But you don’t get a chance to answer because his lips close over yours, pulling you into a kiss that’s everything and nothing you imagined a kiss to be. It’s urgent, hungry, and maddeningly sweet, and you cling to him without a second thought, your legs wrapping around his waist as if by instinct alone.
It feels like everything in the room blurs to nothing around the two of you, like the world has stopped turning.
The sensation between your legs turns wet, slick, and you can feel his hardness through the thin fabric of your shorts, the sensation both thrilling and overwhelming. He groans into the kiss, his hips rocking against you in a motion that leaves you gasping.
You feel so hot all of a sudden—like your whole body is on fire. Your thoughts scatter as you cling to his shoulders, his name on your lips, and it's like he's pushing you higher and higher.
The kiss becomes messy, teeth clashing, lips biting, his hands pulling at your shirt as if trying to pull it off. You’re completely lost to his touch, your body moving against his in a needy rhythm that feels like instinct alone.
But just when you think he might push you further, Jude pulls away abruptly with a sharp groan, his chest heaving as he buries his head against the curve of your shoulder. You’re left with your arms wrapped around his neck, your body trembling as you struggle to catch your breath.
“Fuck,” he mutters, the word hot against your skin. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” His body shudders, his hips rocking forward once, then twice, then he's yanking himself off you like you've just burned him.
You try to hold him closer, but he's too strong and it only seems to make him pull away harder.
“Jude?” you ask, your voice trembling as your thoughts catch up. You’re breathless, your body aching for something you don’t even know how to ask for. "What’s wrong?”
He doesn’t answer. Instead, he just rolls away from you, his hands burying in his hair as he lets out a long groan of frustration.
Your cheeks warm, but there’s something in his look, something that makes your chest flutter. It’s dark, almost possessive, and the intensity steals your breath. You open your mouth to say something—anything—to fill the silence, but before you can speak, Jude rolls to his feet, standing up with a swift motion that sends you sprawling on your back.
“I’m…” He swallows again, “I have to go,” he says, his voice thick, rough. “I’ll see you later, alright?”
You open your mouth, ready to ask why, but he’s already halfway out the door. You catch up just in time to watch him slam the front door closed behind him, the sound of his car roaring to life outside.
You stare at the closed door for a moment, blinking slowly as if you’re half-asleep. Your body still hums from his touches, your muscles soft, your heart pounding, and all you can think is: what did I do wrong?
*********
You don’t see him again for a couple of days.
It’s not unusual for Jude to be busy, his schedule crammed with training sessions, meetings, and endless obligations. But this feels different. He’s never been too busy to send a good morning text, check in with a quick call, or find some excuse to see you, even if it’s just for an hour.
Now, though? It’s radio silence.
The first day, you try to brush it off. You tell yourself that he’s probably exhausted and needs some space. By the second, the worry creeps in, uninvited but persistent. Did you do something wrong? Was it something you said? Something you didn’t say?
By the time he texts you to come over on the third day, you’ve practically convinced yourself he’s about to break things off. The idea leaves your chest feeling hollow.
When you step into his house, he greets you like always, flashing that charming grin that makes your stomach flip. But there’s something off in his posture, the way his arms wrap around you just a little too loosely.
The two of you settle on the couch, a movie playing in the background. Jude is quiet, his arm draped casually over the back of the couch but not quite pulling you in. Normally, he’d be all over you by now, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on your thigh, his lips brushing against your temple. Tonight, he’s… distant.
You bite your lip, stealing glances at him. He seems engrossed in the screen, but his jaw is set tightly, and his hand keeps flexing like he’s restless.
The movie plays on, and you feel like you’re sitting next to a stranger. Your heart pounds as you shift closer, testing the waters. His arm twitches but doesn’t move to pull you closer.
Your voice comes out soft, hesitant. “Jude?”
He hums, not looking at you.
“I missed you,” you admit, hoping it doesn’t sound as needy as it feels.
His lips twitch into a small smile. “Missed you too.” His tone is distracted, his gaze not straying from the screen.
You frown, your brow furrowing. Something’s wrong. You can feel it in the way his body tenses every time you shift a little closer. His hand tightens, loosens, tightens again, but he still doesn’t look at you.
“Can I ask you something?” you start, your voice tentative. When he doesn’t respond, you clear your throat. “Why didn’t you call me this week? You’re always so busy, and I know that, but—” You trail off, hoping he’ll fill in the blanks.
For a moment, he doesn’t respond. The silence between you stretches out uncomfortably, but then his gaze shifts, and you catch the way his eyes soften as they land on you. “It’s nothing.” He reaches for your hand, his fingers intertwining with yours.
You let him take your hand, but the touch feels fleeting, hollow—like he’s holding back. Your chest tightens, the ache spreading to your throat as you try to steady your breathing. You don’t want to push him, but the silence between you is unbearable.
“Jude,” you whisper, squeezing his hand. “It doesn’t feel like nothing.”
He sighs, leaning his head back against the couch. “Look, I’m just busy. That’s all.”
“You’ve always been busy,” you point out, feeling the sting of rejection. “I don’t understand why you couldn’t find time to call me this time.” Your voice cracks, and you look down at your lap to hide it.
He shifts then, his body twisting to face yours, his hand cupping your chin as he forces you to meet his eyes. His expression is soft, his brows furrowing as he studies your face. “Hey,” he murmurs. “I'm sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to upset you. It’s not your fault. I just… I was busy with some things.”
“What things?” you press, frowning at the way he looks at you like you’re a puzzle he can’t figure out. “What did I do? You don’t have to sugarcoat it for me. I promise.”
Jude’s lips quirk, his smile almost wry. “I’m not trying to sugarcoat anything, baby.” He leans forward, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek. His voice drops, turning soft. “It’s just hard for me to be around you.”
“Why?” you breathe out.
He hums, his nose nuzzling against your temple. “You're so… fucking innocent, baby. And you have no idea how much that fucking turns me on. I just can’t—You deserve everything, and I don't want to fuck this up.” He pulls back, his expression shifting to one of frustration. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I want to be good for you, baby.” His thumb brushes against your cheek as he whispers against your skin. “I wanna ruin you."
His words make heat pool low in your stomach, your thighs pressing together. His voice is hypnotic, low and husky, and it takes you a moment to respond. "How would you do that?” you whisper.
His pupils dilate, his lips parting. “Oh fuck.” He swallows audibly, his gaze dropping to your mouth. Jude groans softly, his hand trailing up to cup the side of your face, his thumb stroking your cheek. "You don’t wanna know, sweetheart," he says, his voice thick with restraint. "I shouldn’t even be saying this."
You blink up at him, your lips parting to protest, but no sound comes out. His confession leaves you breathless, and your heart stumbles in your chest. "But I want to know," you whisper, feeling the heat of his gaze settle over you like fog.
His jaw tightens, and he leans in, his forehead pressing gently against yours. "You’re playing with fire," he murmurs, his breath warm and tantalizing against your lips. "Do you have any idea what you do to me?"
You don't move—can't move. It's like his words are pinning you in place with the weight of their meaning.
Jude chuckles softly, the sound low and almost reverent. "God, you’re so cute when you’re shy." His other hand moves to your waist, his fingers brushing against the fabric of your shirt. "I missed you like crazy these past few days, you know that? Couldn’t think straight, couldn’t focus. Just kept picturing you." He swallows thickly, his voice dropping to a low whisper. "Your lips are so fucking soft, and you taste like fucking honey."
His hand cups your face, his eyes burning into yours as he pulls back enough to meet your gaze. "Do you know how many times I've jacked off this week just thinking about your mouth? About what it would be like to fuck you?" He leans in closer, his voice turning harsh. "Do you even realize how fucking sexy you are? You make me lose my goddamn mind, baby."
You don't answer. You're not even sure if you can. His words have your head reeling, your breath catching in your throat. Heat pulses between your legs, making your thighs clench and unclench restlessly.
Jude groans, his face tucking into the crook of your neck as if seeking shelter. "Fuck. See what you fucking do to me? I can't even have a conversation around you, baby. I'm fucking obsessed." His fingers flex against your skin, his hot breath gusting over your neck. "Just being this close to you is driving me crazy."
Your breath hitches, a small noise escaping you as you wrap your arms around his shoulders instinctively. His words are making you feel… something. Your brain can't quite put a name to it, but it's making you feel soft and needy and… wet.
Jude seems to notice because he freezes, his nose dipping to the side of your neck, breathing you in deeply. "Are you wet, baby?" he murmurs, the question sending a flush up your cheeks. His voice is low, dark, and it does nothing to help the ache between your legs.
You squirm against him, pressing your thighs together in an attempt to alleviate the sensation. His hand cups your ass, pulling your body flush against his as he growls low against your neck.
"Answer me," he grunts, his hips pressing forward with a motion that makes you gasp.
Your head swims as if from a lack of oxygen, but you manage to whisper, "Y-yes."
Jude's whole body shudders against you , his head dropping to the crook of your shoulder as he groans again. "Fuck, sweetheart." His voice is hot against your skin, the words a mix of frustration and desire. "What did I tell you?" he murmurs almost absently. "About making me lose my fucking mind?"
The tension between you seems to grow thicker with every second that passes, and before you know it, you're being pulled onto his lap, his mouth crashing over yours in a desperate kiss. You cling to him, letting him devour you completely, and it feels like nothing else in the world matters but this.
Except he pulls away again just as quickly, his hands coming up to grip your shoulders and hold you at arm's length. You stare at him, confused, your cheeks flushed, your breath coming out in quick pants.
"Jude," you breathe out, reaching for him.
But he shakes his head, his jaw flexing with restraint as he holds you still. "No, baby. If I touch you again right now, I don’t think I'll be able to stop myself." His voice dips, growing rougher. "You're not ready for that." He leans in to nuzzle your nose, his words coming out as a soft apology against your skin. "You deserve better than me losing control like this."
You frown at his words, feeling them hit somewhere deep in your chest, but before you can find a way to respond, he pulls away and stands up. "Wait!" Your hand shoots out and drags him back to the sofa with a strength that surprises both of you.
"I—I want it. I want you to… have me." The words come out before you can take them back, but instead of being met with rejection, Jude’s eyes darken, his pupils expanding to eat up the color of his eyes. His grip tightens on your hand, and you hear him swallow thickly.
"Are you sure?" he asks, his voice husky and soft. "Baby, if you let me touch you like that, I won’t be able to hold back." He leans forward as if drawn by gravity, his lips grazing against yours as he murmurs against your mouth. "You want that?"
The question makes your cheeks flush, the sensation traveling down to pulse between your legs. Your stomach clenches, and you find yourself nodding, your lips brushing against his with the motion.
His soft groan vibrates through your entire body. His hand cups the side of your face with a gentleness that contradicts the heat in his eyes. "Baby," he whispers, his lips ghosting over yours. He leans back then, his expression softening, a hint of amusement tilting the corner of his lips upward. "You sure? You’re not just saying that because you think it’s what I want to hear?"
You shake your head , your breath hitching when his thumb trails over your bottom lip. "I trust you." The words slip out of you on a whisper, but they seem to mean something to him because he lets out a soft exhale.
“Fuck,” he groans, dropping his forehead against yours. “If you don’t stop being so fucking sweet, baby, I’m gonna fuck you on this couch, and neither of us will be ready for that.” He lets out an unsteady laugh, his words making heat spread through your body. "You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into." He tilts his head, his eyes narrowing, a small smirk twisting his lips. "But if you still want me to teach you after tonight, then I promise you that I’ll be the one to ruin you like you want." With that, he leans in and kisses you gently, the motion soft and sweet.
When he pulls back, his voice drops to a growl. “I can't wait to ruin you.” His words are so low, so full of warning that you wonder what he plans to do to you. The idea makes your pulse quicken, your stomach fluttering.
Jude leans in to press another kiss to your lips, his tongue darting out to lick at the seam of your mouth. “I’ll show you just how good it can be,” he whispers against your mouth, and then he pulls away with a soft bite to your bottom lip, leaving you breathless and wanting so much more.
He gives you another kiss that promises to corrupt, then leaves you on the couch feeling like your whole world has been flipped on its head. You wonder what the next few weeks will be like now.
********
"I want to learn how to please Jude." Is not what Charlie expects to hear from you.
You who are painfully shy and would rather hide under the covers than have a conversation about this sort of thing. So you imagine that your words catch her off guard when you approach her in your room, both of you lying on the bed side by side.
Charlie looks at you with a mixture of shock and amusement. "Well shit, girl. What brought that on?" She reaches over and puts a hand on your arm in comfort. "What happened?"
You fidget nervously. "It's just… I want to please him, and I don't know how. We've been dating for a while now, and I feel like it's time to try something new." You lower your eyes at the last part, your cheeks burning like crazy. "We've been together for so long and we still haven't done anything." You take a shaky breath. "I don't want him to get tired of me."
Charlie stares at you for a long moment, then she cracks out laughing. "Girl, you're so silly."
"What?" Your voice comes out pouty.
"Oh, come on." She chuckles. "You're being silly. There's no way in hell that Jude could be upset with you." She gives you a playful push, "Y/N, that guy is madly in love with you. He looks at you like he's obsessed. There's no chance he's getting tired of you."
You smile softly at her words, hope blooming in your chest at her confidence. "Yeah?" you ask, your tone breathless.
"Yeah." Charlie's expression softens, her voice turning gentle. "He looks at you the same way you do him. So please, stop worrying about it and just let him make the first move. Don't feel pressured into doing something you don't want to."
You nod, your brows furrowing as you look away. "That's the thing though. I do want to." Your voice drops to a whisper. "But I don't know what I'm doing."
Charlie looks at you for a second, then nods. "Ok. So what do you want to do?" She asks, her tone soft.
You look up at her, "What do guys like?" You ask, the question slipping out before you can stop it. You bite your lip and look away, feeling your cheeks burn.
Charlie laughs softly, the sound almost like a purr, "Ooo, Y/NNNN. Are you trying to turn me on?" She jokes. You know she's kidding because she's making that face she always makes right after telling a really funny joke.
"Charlie!" You push her with a giggle.
"What?" She pushes you back with a grin, "Come on, Y/N. If you're going to be a big girl and have sex, you should be able to talk about it."
You pout at her. "That's not fair. I ask you for help, and you're teasing me."
She chuckles and rolls her eyes with a smile, "Ok, ok. What do you wanna know?"
"Everything." You say, your face heating up even more.
"Everything?" Charlie quirks a brow, propping herself up on one elbow to get a better look at you. "Girl, that's a tall order. Are we talking the birds and the bees 'everything' or just the Jude-specific 'everything'?"
You bury your face in your hands, groaning. "This is so embarrassing."
Charlie laughs, a genuine, warm sound that makes you peek at her through your fingers. "Y/N, relax. Seriously. This is normal stuff. And you’re with Jude Bellingham, of all people. Do you have any idea how hungry he is? That man eye fucks you everytime you're in the room."
You groan again, rolling onto your stomach and burying your face in the pillow. "Stop! You're making it worse."
Charlie snorts, patting your back. "Okay, okay, I’ll stop. Let’s get serious for a sec. First of all, there’s no ‘right’ way to do anything. Everyone’s different. But if you really want to know what Jude likes, just…ask him. You already know him better than anyone else."
You lift your head slightly, just enough to look at her. "But what if I mess up?"
Charlie tilts her head, giving you a soft smile. "Y/N, you can’t mess up with someone who loves you. Jude’s not going to care if you don’t know everything. He’s crazy about you—trust me, I’ve seen it. The guy practically glows when you’re in the room. Just talk to him, be yourself, and let things happen naturally."
You chew on your bottom lip, processing her words. "I guess that makes sense. But what if—"
You’re interrupted by the familiar sound of your phone buzzing on the nightstand. Charlie smirks knowingly. "Bet you ten bucks it’s him."
You reach for your phone, and sure enough, Jude’s name lights up the screen. Your heart does a little flip, and Charlie cackles at the way your face immediately softens.
"Go on," she says, waving her hand. "Answer it. Lover boy’s probably wondering why you’ve been ignoring him all evening."
You hesitate for a moment before swiping to answer. "Hey," you say softly, your voice a little shaky.
"Hey, love." Jude’s deep, smooth voice comes through the line, instantly putting you at ease. "What’re you up to?"
"Just hanging out with Charlie," you reply, glancing at your friend, who’s grinning like a Cheshire cat. You roll your eyes at her. "What about you?"
"Thinking about you," he says, and you can hear the smile in his voice. "Missed you today."
Your cheeks flush, and Charlie makes a gagging motion, though her grin only widens. "I… I missed you too," you admit shyly, your fingers twisting in the hem of your sweater.
"Yeah?" Jude’s tone is playful, but there’s an edge of sincerity that makes your heart flutter. "What’re you doing after Charlie goes? Can I come see you?"
Your stomach flips, and you glance at Charlie, who’s mouthing Say yes! with an exaggerated expression. "Um, yeah," you say, trying to sound casual despite the way your voice wobbles. "If you want to."
"Of course I want to," he says, chuckling softly. "I’ll be over in a bit, yeah?"
"Okay," you whisper, unable to keep the smile out of your voice.
"See you soon, love."
You hang up and immediately bury your face in the pillow again, earning a loud laugh from Charlie. "Oh my God, you’re hopeless," she teases, nudging you with her foot. "You’re like a lovesick puppy. It’s adorable."
"Shut up," you mumble, though you’re smiling. You peek at her as you sit up. "Thanks, though. You were really helpful."
She snorts. "Clearly. But seriously, just relax. Be yourself. I promise he’ll love it. And if all else fails just give him a blowjob" She ducks just in time to miss the pillow you chuck her way. "I’ve gotta go. My ride’s coming in a minute." She climbs off the bed and heads over to the dresser to grab her phone. "I think I left my keys downstairs. Tell Jude I said hi."
"Will do," you say, smiling softly.
She waves before heading out the door and leaving you alone. You sink back into the covers, trying not to let your nerves get the best of you.
**********
A half hour later, you’re pacing in front of the living room door, your nerves bubbling up with every step. You keep glancing at the clock, willing the minutes to tick faster and slower all at once.
Your hands feel clammy, and you’re acutely aware of every tiny sound in the apartment—the hum of the refrigerator, the distant chatter of your upstairs neighbors, the soft patter of your socked feet against the floor. You’ve checked your reflection in the hallway mirror at least five times, brushing nonexistent lint from your sweater.
When you finally hear the familiar, rhythmic knock that signals Jude’s arrival, your heart skips a beat. You nearly trip over your own feet as you hurry to the door, pulling it open so quickly that Jude looks startled for a split second before his expression melts into that devastatingly familiar grin—the one that never fails to make your stomach flip.
"There’s my girl," he greets warmly, his voice a velvety blend of affection and amusement. Before you can even stammer out a hello, he steps forward, slipping one arm around your waist and pulling you into him. His lips find yours in a heartbeat, soft and warm, and you let out a small, involuntary sigh as his other hand settles on the back of your neck.
"Hi," you manage to mumble against his lips, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jude chuckles, the sound rumbling low in his chest as he pulls back just enough to meet your gaze. "Hello to you too," he murmurs, his thumb brushing an absentminded circle against your hip. His brown eyes are locked on yours, teasing. "You seem a little eager tonight. Miss me, baby?"
The heat rushes to your cheeks in an instant, and you lower your gaze, biting your lip to suppress the shy smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. "Maybe," you mumble, your voice so soft it’s almost lost in the space between you.
Jude’s grin widens, and he cups your face with one hand, his thumb brushing gently over the apple of your cheek. "Maybe?" he echoes, pretending to be wounded. "I’ve been thinking about you all day, and I get a maybe?" His tone is playful, but his eyes are so full of adoration that it makes your chest ache in the best way.
You fidget under his gaze, your hands instinctively gripping the hem of your sweater. "Of course I missed you," you admit shyly, barely managing to look up at him.
"That’s more like it," he says softly, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. His lips linger there for a moment, and when he pulls back, there’s a tenderness in his expression that makes your heart flutter. "Missed you too, you know. More than I probably should admit."
Your stomach flips at his words, and you let out a breathless laugh, not quite sure how to respond. Jude doesn’t seem to mind your silence; he just brushes another kiss to the tip of your nose before letting his hand slide from your face to your hand, lacing your fingers together.
"So," he starts, his voice dropping into a conspiratorial tone, "is Charlie still here, or do we have the place to ourselves?"
You shake your head, feeling your cheeks warm again at the implication. "She left about an hour ago," you reply, your voice still soft.
Jude grins. "Perfect. Let’s do something scandalous then," he teases, his voice dripping with faux mischief.
You blink up at him, wide-eyed. "Scandalous?" Is this it?
"Yep," he says with a wink. "Like…watching a movie we’ve already seen twenty times while cuddling on the couch. Absolutely outrageous, right?" You try not to deflate at his words and he must've noticed because he smirks down at you.
You let out a soft force chuckle, not seeing the teasing grin on his face. "Yeah, sure."
"Great!" Jude quips, tugging you toward the living room. "C’mon, let’s pick something good."
By "good," you know he means your favorite DVD, the one you’ve insisted on watching so many times that you’re sure he knows half the lines by heart. Sure enough, you makes a beeline for the small shelf in your room, plucking the case from its spot with a triumphant flourish.
"We have to find something new, you know that right?" he teases as you holds it up for him to see. Like he doesn't love it just as much as you. Maybe more. Not that he'll ever admit that to you.
"And yet you keep coming back," you counter quietly, feeling braver than usual.
Jude’s grin softens into something sweeter as he crosses the room to stand in front of you. "Because you’re worth it," he says simply, his voice so sincere it makes your chest tighten. He leans in, pressing a quick kiss to your temple before taking your hand again and leading you to your bed. "Now let’s go watch our favorite movie while cuddled in bed like good little nerds."
You follow him, feeling like you’re floating.
The movie’s been playing for about twenty minutes when you finally start to relax, tucked under Jude’s arm with a cozy blanket draped over both of you. The familiar dialogue flows easily in the background, and you can feel the steady rise and fall of Jude’s chest against your side. You're lulled into a state of peace, your head resting against his shoulder, your leg draped over his as you settle in.
It's when the movie gets to the good part that you hear (feel) Jude's stomach growl from under your ear, the low sound vibrating up his chest.
"Shit," he mutters with a quiet laugh, rubbing a hand absently over his stomach. "I’m fucking starving."
You lift your head from his shoulder to peer at his face. “You want me to make you something?” you ask, even though you don't feel like cooking, your hand coming up to copy his gesture.
His eyes flick down to yours, "Yeah," he says slowly, his voice low and soft. He lifts a hand, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear with a touch so gentle you barely feel it. His gaze follows the motion, his eyes darkening. "That’d be great, baby."
Your pulse quickens at the softness of his tone, but you nod and slip out of his arms, the movement sending the blanket tumbling to the bed. You slip out of the room, feeling his eyes on your back like a caress.
When you return with two bowls of popcorn in hand and a couple bags of snacks, Jude looks up from the spot he's settled in on the couch, his eyes sliding to yours for a heartbeat before dropping down to the food.
“Thank God,” he murmurs, taking one of the bowls from your hands with a grin. You try not to notice the way he brushes his fingers against yours as you pass him the bowl, but the touch makes your stomach flip anyway.
You sink back down beside him on the bed and take a seat. His leg presses up against yours, warm through the fabric of your jeans, and you feel yourself melting into him automatically, his warmth and scent pulling you in.
Jude lifts a handful of popcorn to his mouth, chewing as he settles his arm around your shoulder, the motion drawing you in even closer, until you're practically nestled against his side. His other hand lands on your thigh, his thumb brushing a slow pattern against your leg as he watches the movie. The motion sends a shiver up your spine, and you find your eyes dropping to the sight of his large hand against your leg, his fingertips lightly tracing the soft skin.
The feeling of his hand on you, the heat of his body against yours, is so good that you forget everything else around you—his soft, contented munching, the gentle way he tugs you in closer every now and then, the way you can feel his breath ghosting along the back of your neck and sending shivers up your spine.
You forget about it all until you feel his eyes on you, and you glance up to meet his gaze.
Jude is staring at you, his eyes half-lidded and his face tilted toward you. His expression is soft, his gaze almost… hungry. His tongue darts out to wet his bottom lip, his teeth catching it for just a heartbeat before he lets it slide free. You watch the whole thing in rapt fascination, your cheeks flushing when his gaze flicks down to yours and catches you staring.
"See something you like?" he asks with a low smirk, his voice soft and playful.
You feeling your skin heat up, feeling your pulse quicken and your stomach clench. You lower your eyes, biting your bottom lip to try and contain the frown that's threatening to break across your face.
"Y/N." His voice drops even lower, his hand tightening on your leg as you feel him lean in. His warm breath feathers along the shell of your ear, making you shiver and squirm. "Look at me."
Your eyes flick up to meet his, and his gaze is so warm that you can't look away. You're caught in his stare, the heat building between you like a flame.
"You're really fucking cute when you're shy," he murmurs softly, his grin widening as he reaches up to brush his thumb against the apple of your cheek, his touch feather-light. His eyes follow the motion, and his lips part as he takes a shallow breath, his body seeming to lean in on its own.
Your breath catches in your throat, and you forget to breathe for just a heartbeat as he presses his lips to yours, the kiss light and quick. When he pulls back, he doesn't go far, his face still hovering just a breath away.
"What?" you whisper, your pulse quickening at the way his eyes seem to darken as they drop down to look at your lips.
He lets out a soft, deep chuckle that vibrates through his chest. "What do you think?" His gaze is full of heat as he leans in again, the kiss softer this time, his lips barely brushing over yours. The motion makes you melt into him, your body seeming to go pliant under his touch. "You're too fucking sweet."
Your stomach flips at the way he says that, your hand coming up automatically to cup his neck. You draw him in, deepening the kiss with a soft sound, and he makes a pleased noise against your lips as he opens for you, letting you in.
The kiss turns soft and gentle, a sweet press of lips that makes you feel all fluttery inside, and you sink into it like a fish to water, losing yourself in the heat between you.
When Jude pulls back this time, it's with a groan, his brow furrowing as he tugs away, his breathing a little ragged. "We gotta stop."
You frown, feeling the sudden loss of him like a cold shower. You hesitate for a second, then reach out to cup his face with your palm, my thumb brushing over the sharp curve of his cheekbone.
"Jude—" you start softly, and he lets out another soft groan, sinking into your touch as he closes his eyes for a moment.
"Hm?" he hums against your palm, his tone low and tortured.
"I want you," you whisper, the word slipping out before you can stop it.
His eyes fly open at your words, his gaze snapping back to yours, and for just a heartbeat, he looks almost pained. Then he lets out a harsh breath and drops his head to yours, burying his face in the crook of your neck.
"I—fuck," he mutters, his voice muffled against your skin, and you can feel his body vibrating with the tension of his emotion. His hand cups the back of your skull, pulling you in closer. "I need a minute."
Your brows furrow at his words. What's wrong? you want to ask, but then Jude lets out a soft groan and bites you lightly on the neck, and all thoughts fly out of your mind.
His lips press to your skin with a soft, wet sound, the suction making your stomach flip. When he pulls back to look up at you, his mouth is swollen, his eyes heavy-lidded. He stares at you for a long moment, his gaze roaming down over your features before meeting yours again.
"Are you sure?" he asks, his voice almost a growl.
You nod, swallowing hard, your heart beating in your throat. I've never been more sure of anything.
Jude groans softly and kisses you again, the motion firm and deep as he pushes you backward until you're lying flat on the bed, his body covering yours. "How far do you want to go?" He mutters against your mouth, his voice deep and husky, his tongue darting out to trace your lips.
You hesitate for a heartbeat, unsure of how to answer. "Just… more than this?" you mumble softly, your hand tracing up his arm and coming to rest on his chest.
His other hand slides down to your waist, his fingers curling around your hip as he shifts, pressing you back into the bed. The weight of him, the heat of his body against yours, is overwhelming in the best way, and you can’t help the soft sound that escapes you.
"God, you’re perfect," he mutters. His lips trail down to your jaw, then your neck, leaving a trail of soft, heated kisses that make your skin tingle. "Tell me if I’m going too far, okay? Promise me."
You nod wordlessly, unable to speak around the pulse pounding in your throat.
Jude trails his lips along your collarbone, nipping gently at the skin before he lifts his head and catches your eyes with a heated look. "If it feels good," he starts slowly, his gaze locked on yours as his hand shifts up to cup your face, "tell me."
His other hand drops to your waist again, his palm skimming along your hip before sliding up underneath your shirt to land on the bare skin of your stomach. You gasp at the feeling of his warm palm against your skin, your breath catching as his fingers splay out over your belly, his touch sending a shiver up your spine.
"You like that, baby?" His eyes are dark with arousal as he stares down at you, his fingers sliding up to trace over the underside of your breast through your bra. The touch sends a shock straight through your body, your eyes fluttering closed. "Tell me, Y/N," he urges softly.
You gasp softly, letting out a wordless sound as you arch under his touch, your hands coming up to cling to his shoulders. You feel like you're melting into him, like your body is going limp as you let out another soft sound. "Yes."
Jude groans and presses a kiss to your neck, his mouth moving against your skin as he speaks. "Good girl." His hand moves up again, his fingers tracing up the bare skin of your side before his palm cups your breast, his thumb brushing lightly over your nipple.
You gasp again, your breath catching in your throat as you squirm under his touch. He doesn't stop, though; his fingers slip under the edge of your bra cup to brush over your nipple with a feather-light touch.
"God," he mutters hoarsely against your skin, his palm moving in a slow circle over your breast. "You have no idea how fucking good that feels."
His other hand shifts down to settle on your thigh, just above the knee, and you feel a shiver run through you. Your pulse is racing in your ears, the touch of him setting your whole body aflame.
You squirm under him, a soft, high-pitched moan slipping from between your lips, and Jude’s groan is immediate and deep. He shifts to settle his leg between your thighs, and you gasp again at the feeling of him against you. You can feel the hard length of him through his jeans, and the sensation sends another shiver up your spine.
"Fuck, Y/N," he rasps against your neck, his breath hot against your skin. His fingers trail down your ribs to your stomach, his palm landing flat against your belly with a soft press. "You’re gonna kill me."
The feeling of his hands on you is too much, and you squirm again, arching under his touch as you let out a high, breathless sound. Jude curses softly, shifting his leg against your center, and you feel another rush of wetness slip from you. His palm moves down to settle between your legs, his hand covering your mound with a warm press that makes you gasp.
"Tell me," he rasps, his voice full of emotion as he kisses your neck again. "Does this feel good?"
You can’t speak; all you can manage is a wordless nod, your hips arching up against his hand. Jude groans again, his breath feathering along your neck, his lips brushing a trail down to the neckline of your shirt.
He's still kissing you when he slides his hand down the waistband of your pants, his fingers trailing over the wet cotton of your panties before slipping under the edge to press against your bare skin. You feel a rush of pleasure at the touch, your whole body tensing, and Jude curses again softly as his palm presses against you, the weight of him making you feel warm and safe.
"Is this okay?" he asks raggedly, his fingers moving up to stroke against your clit through your panties.
The sensation sends a jolt of pleasure through you, and you let out a soft gasp as your hips shift against his palm. You nod wordlessly, your hands shifting up to clutch at his shoulders, and Jude groans again at the sensation of you against him.
"I need words baby," he rasps, his finger slipping under the cotton to brush against your clit with a slow press.
You let out another high-pitched sound, squirming under his hand as his finger shifts to rub against you in slow circles. His palm presses against your mound with a gentle weight, the pressure building between your legs and making your breath come in short, shallow gasps.
"Jude…please," you gasp, your hips shifting against his hand again.
"Please what?" He nuzzles your neck again, his lips feathering a trail along the skin. His finger doesn't stop moving, though, the feeling sending a rush of warmth through you. "Tell me what you need."
Your cheeks flush at his words, and you swallow hard. "Jude…" you murmur, your voice barely above a whisper.
"Come on," he rasps gently against your ear. "Tell me."
You squirm again, trying to get away from the feeling of his finger on your clit and the sudden wave of embarrassment that crashes over you. Jude doesn’t let you escape, though; his other arm tightens around your waist as his finger presses down harder against your clit, making the pleasure build between your legs.
"Yes!," you moan again, your voice high and breathless, your legs squirming against his hips. "More! P-please."
He groans loudly against your neck, his teeth catching at the skin in a sharp nip that makes you cry out. "God, fuck. You’re so good for me," he mutters in a hoarse rasp. Then he's pulling away. "Take off your pants for me baby. I wanna see you."
You nod, your hands dropping to your waist as you shove the fabric down. You’re not even fully out of them when Jude slides in the bed behind you. His arms come up around your waist, drawing you back against him, and his mouth drops to nuzzle against the back of your neck, the warmth of his breath sending a shiver down your spine.
He pulls you flush against him, his hips fitting against your ass in a way that makes you realize just how turned on he is. You let out another soft gasp, squirming back against him as you feel the length of his cock pressing between your ass cheeks.
Jude groans loudly again, his hands coming up to grip your hips as he pulls you more firmly against him. "Fuck, you feel so good," he rumbles, his mouth nuzzling a trail up the back of your neck. He kisses your skin softly, the warm press of his lips sending another shiver through you.
His hands move down to slip under the edge of your underwear, his fingers brushing against the bare skin of your thigh. You feel your stomach clench, the anticipation building inside you as his hand skims up to press between your legs. His fingers slide against your wet pussy, his palm cupping you firmly with a possessive press that makes your whole body tremble.
"Fuck," he growls hoarsely again, his lips trailing down to press a kiss to the back of your shoulder. "You're so wet for me." His fingers shift to press your folds through the fabric, stroking lightly against your clit as the wet slick sound of your arousal fills the air. "Do you like it when I touch you?"
You gasp at his words, feeling a hot blush rise up your neck. "Y-yes…" you gasp out.
He groans again, "You're really fucking perfect for me, you know that?" he rasps. "Take these off for me, baby."
You swallow hard, your hands lifting to your sides as you move to shimmy out of your panties, quickly closing your legs as soon as they're off. You hear Jude’s groan against your hair a moment before you feel his palm press down to your thigh.
"You getting shy on me, princess? Hm?" His voice is teasing as he nudges your legs apart again, his fingers trailing down over your skin as he pulls them further and further apart. You gasp softly as you feel your pussy lips spread with the movement, your clit throbbing. "Open up for me."
Your blush deepens, and you hesitate for a moment, unsure of what to do, but Jude’s warm breath on your neck is making you melt and your thigh part for him.
"Good girl," he praises softly. "Now let me see what's mine." His hand trails down to settle between your spread legs, his palm cupping your pussy firmly with a warm weight. Your eyes roll back at the sensation. "Look how wet you are," he groans. "You're fucking dripping for me, baby."
His hand shifts, his fingers dipping down to press against your folds, and the feeling is so good it makes you shiver. You gasp again, feeling another rush of liquid heat slip from you as his fingers spread your lips apart. You feel the cool air brush against your wet skin, and you blush hotly again at the sound of your own wetness filling the air.
"Look at that pretty pussy," Jude rasps, his voice deep and rough as he looks down over your shoulder at your wet folds "Fucking gorgeous."
His fingers shift to press against you again, and he lets out a pleased sound as he feels your wetness, his voice dropping to a deep whisper. "You love it, don't you?" he rumbles. "I can tell by the way you soak my fingers." He nuzzles his face into the back of your neck again, his breath making your skin prickle.
"Yes," you moan softly, your eyes drifting closed at the pleasure of his fingers against you.
Jude groans in response, his hand tightening around your hip as his fingers stroke against you faster. The feeling is so good that you can’t hold back your high-pitched sounds.
"Want me to make you cum, sweetheart?" he rasps against the skin of your neck, his fingers finding your clit with a sure press. The pleasure is so intense that you cry out at the sensation, your legs quivering as his thumb begins to rub against you with slow circles.
"Yeah?" Jude whispers in your ear, his voice low and husky. "Give it to me, baby." His voice is like liquid honey against your skin as his fingers shift, two of them sliding up to circle your clit in tight motions, the pad of his thumb rubbing against you in a steady, soft press.
You're so wet that you can hear the sloppy sound of him touching you, his palm cupped around your mound to shield it from the cool air of the room. You can tell he likes it, too; his breath is hot against your neck, and he groans roughly at the feeling of you in his hand.
The contrast between the heat of his palm and the chill of the air makes you shiver, but it’s nothing compared to the way his fingers are lazily stroking through your slickness, his touch teasing, reverent.
“God,” Jude groans, the sound raw, like he’s barely keeping himself together. “You hear that, sweetheart?” His voice is heavy with something dark and sweet, something that makes your stomach flip. “So fucking wet for me.”
You let out a tiny whimper, embarrassed but unable to deny how much you like the way he’s touching you, the way he’s looking at you—like you’re the only thing in the world that matters. You try to close your thighs instinctively, but he doesn’t let you, his hand pressing you open again with a quiet chuckle.
“No, no, don’t get shy on me now,” he murmurs, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear, sending a fresh wave of heat through your body. “Let me make you feel good, baby. Let me take care of you.”
You don’t trust yourself to speak, so you just nod, your face burning, and he exhales a quiet curse before pressing a kiss to the side of your neck.
“Can I stick a finger in, sweetheart?” he asks, his voice low and smooth, like honey, like he already knows the answer. He presses the tip of his middle finger against your entrance, just barely there, waiting, teasing.
You gasp at the sensation, your hips arching against his hand without thinking, seeking more. You don’t even realize how eager you are until you hear the sharp breath he takes in, feel the way his other arm tightens around your waist, holding you flush against him.
“That’s a yes?” Jude teases, but his voice is strained, like he’s holding himself back.
You nod, swallowing thickly, and then his finger presses inside you, sinking in slowly, inch by inch, stretching you open in the most delicious way. Your breath stutters, a soft, helpless sound escaping you as your body adjusts to the intrusion, and Jude groans in response, his face pressing against your hair.
“Fuck,” he mutters, his voice rough, almost pained. “You’re so tight, baby.”
You whimper, overwhelmed, your hands clutching the sheets beneath you as he strokes his finger in and out, curling it slightly with each movement. The sensation is foreign but intoxicating, sending little sparks of pleasure through your body with every slow, deliberate thrust.
His lips find your shoulder, pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses against your skin as he moves, his breath fanning over you in hot, uneven bursts. “Little virgin pussy just for me,” he whispers against your skin, and the words send a rush of something heady and desperate straight to your core.
Your body clenches around him involuntarily, and he groans at the feeling, his whole body shuddering behind you. “Fuck, baby. Do that again.”
You don’t mean to, but the way he’s touching you, the way his palm is dragging against your clit every time his fingers move, it’s too much. Your body reacts on instinct, tightening around him again, and he curses under his breath, his teeth sinking lightly into your shoulder as if he needs something to ground himself.
“Jude,” you whimper, unsure of what you’re asking for, only knowing that you need more.
“I got you, sweetheart,” he murmurs, and then he’s slipping another finger inside you, filling you even more, stretching you in a way that feels impossibly good. His other hand slides under your shirt, palms up your stomach until he finds your breast, cupping it gently, his thumb rubbing over your sensitive nipple. “You’re taking me so well,” he praises, voice thick with adoration.
The combination of it all—the heat of his body, the skill of his fingers, the sweetness in his voice—is overwhelming, and you can feel something building, coiling tight in the pit of your stomach, desperate to break free.
He can tell. Of course, he can.
“That’s it, sweetheart,” Jude murmurs against your skin, his fingers moving faster, his palm pressing just the right way against your clit. “You’re close, aren’t you? Gonna come for me?”
You nod frantically, your breath coming in short, uneven gasps.
“Good girl,” he breathes, his voice dripping with pride, and the praise sends you spiraling.
The pleasure crashes over you like a tidal wave, your whole body trembling as your release washes through you.
"Oh, God!" You cry out, Jude’s name falling from your lips in a breathless moan, and he groans, holding you tightly as he works you through it, his fingers never stopping, drawing it out until you’re completely spent, boneless in his arms.
You don’t realize how loud you were until the room falls into a thick silence, the only sound left is your heavy breathing and the faint rustle of the sheets.
Jude presses a slow, lingering kiss to the back of your head, his fingers slipping out of you with a wet pop, and you whimper at the emptiness, the oversensitivity. He shushes you gently, soothing you with soft touches, sweet kisses.
“You did so good, baby,” he murmurs, nuzzling against your hair. “So fucking perfect for me.”
Your heart is still pounding in your chest, your body still tingling, but all you can focus on is the warmth of him, the steady rise and fall of his breath against your back.
For the first time in your life, you feel like you’re seeing color.
"That good, huh?," Jude murmurs as he pulls his fingers from between your legs, sliding them up to cup your pussy possessively with a slow rub. Then he brings the fingers to his mouth, sucking them clean with a quiet groan of pleasure as you watch, your breath catching in your throat at the sight. His eyes locks on yours, the heat between you palpable as you gasp.
You nod, your cheeks flushing as he smirks, his tongue darting out to lick his palm.
"Tastes so fucking good too," he mutters, his voice dark with emotion. He drops his head to press a kiss to your neck, your collarbone, his hands slipping up to grip your shoulders firmly.
It's like a switch had been flipped inside you—And all you know is that you never want to go without feeling that again.
You're still breathing fast, your heart still pounding in your ears, "God damn, baby. You're gonna be the end of me."
***********
Pleasure has had a whole new meaning for you since that night.
And Jude is relentless. Ever the indulger.
There are moments when it feels like he can't keep his hands off of you at all. It's like he's gone feral.
Like the other day when you were cooking dinner, and you were wearing nothing but shorts and a tank top that barely covered your ass.
You were leaning over to stir the pot of pasta, completely focused on your task, until you felt Jude’s arms curl around your waist, pulling you back against him. His chest was warm, solid, and you felt the slow rise and fall of his breathing against your back before his hands slid up to cup your breasts, squeezing them roughly with a low groan.
“You’re tryin’ to kill me, aren’t you?” he murmured against your neck, pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses along your skin. “Walkin’ around like this, actin’ like I won’t do anything about it.”
Your breath hitched as he rolled his hips against your ass, making you gasp. “J-Jude, I’m cooking.”
“Mhm.” He hummed lazily, fingers toying with your nipples through the thin fabric of your top. “And I’m hungry for something else.”
That ended with him eating you out for the first time, right there on the kitchen counter. An experience unlike any other. The way his tongue moved against you, how his fingers rubbed over your clit as he lapped at you—fuck. Just thinking about it makes your cheeks flush and your panties wet.
Then there was the time you fell asleep in his lap while watching a movie at his place.
You woke up to his hands between your legs. He wasn’t even doing anything, just keeping his hand there, warm and possessive. When you stirred and gave him a sleepy, questioning look, he just smirked down at you, dimples flashing.
“S’ mine,” he said simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. As if you belonged to him in every possible way.
And, god, the way he looks at you sometimes. Like he’s starving. Like he’s memorizing every inch of you. Like he’s still in disbelief that you’re his.
Right now you're at his apartment getting ready for your picnic date. You've decided to spend the summer with him since going home is out of the question for you this year. You're super excited to go on this picnic. It’s a surprise, so you have no idea where you’re going. But, from the way Jude looks, you’re pretty sure it's going to be great. He's practically bouncing in excitement.
Jude’s apartment smells like sandalwood and something faintly citrusy, a scent that clings to his skin, to the soft cotton of his hoodie, to the air around you. You’re standing in front of the full-length mirror in his bedroom, smoothing out the fabric of your sundress, your heart fluttering with the kind of nervous excitement that makes your fingers tremble just a little.
Behind you, Jude is practically bouncing on his heels, barely containing his excitement. It’s endearing, the way he can hardly stay still, like a golden retriever about to go on a walk.
“You almost ready, sweetheart?” he asks, his voice warm, teasing.
You catch his gaze in the mirror—he’s watching you with an expression that makes your stomach tighten, makes heat rise to your cheeks. The way he looks at you, dark eyes smoldering with something unspoken, always makes you feel like he’s seeing more than just what’s on the surface. Like he’s memorizing you.
“I—I think so,” you say softly, reaching for your cardigan, but before you can grab it, Jude steps in behind you, his chest pressing lightly against your back. His fingers brush over your bare shoulders, slow and deliberate, sending a shiver down your spine.
“You don’t need this,” he murmurs, lips so close to your ear that you feel the warmth of his breath. “It’s warm out.”
You swallow hard, your skin prickling under his touch. He knows exactly what he’s doing, and the worst part is that he enjoys it—loves the way you get all shy and flustered under his attention.
“I might get cold later,” you mumble, looking anywhere but at him.
Jude grins against your hair, his arms slipping around your waist, pulling you back against him. “I’ll keep you warm, baby.”
Your breath catches. The way he says it, so effortlessly, like a promise wrapped in silk, makes you dizzy.
“Jude…”
“Mm?”
“I—I thought we were leaving?” you manage, heart pounding.
He laughs, nuzzling into your neck, pressing a slow, lingering kiss just below your ear. “We are. But you keep distracting me.”
Your entire body feels like it’s on fire, and you don’t trust yourself to say anything without making a complete fool of yourself, so you just push lightly at his arms. He chuckles but lets you go, stepping back with his hands raised in mock surrender.
“Fine, fine. But you really do look beautiful, sweetheart.”
You duck your head, smiling despite yourself. “You always say that.”
“Because it’s always true.”
You shake your head at him, but the warmth in his gaze, the sincerity laced in his words, makes your heart swell.
As you gather your things, Jude grabs the picnic basket, still humming under his breath, his excitement infectious. He won’t tell you where you’re going—he’s been annoyingly secretive about it all morning—but from the way he keeps stealing glances at you, like he’s holding onto some grand secret, you know it’s going to be something special.
The car ride is filled with soft music and Jude’s hand resting comfortably on your thigh, his thumb tracing absentminded circles on your skin. Every now and then, he glances at you, a small, knowing smirk playing at his lips whenever he catches you sneaking a look at him.
“Excited?” he asks.
You nod, fingers twisting together in your lap. “Yeah. I love surprises.”
Jude grins, squeezing your thigh. “Good. ‘Cause you’re gonna love this one.”
The drive takes longer than you expected, but you don’t mind. With Jude, time always seems to melt away, the world outside shrinking until it’s just the two of you, wrapped in a little bubble of quiet intimacy.
When he finally pulls up to the destination, your breath catches. The sun is beginning to dip in the sky, casting everything in soft golden hues, and in front of you is a secluded little meadow, framed by towering trees. It looks like something out of a painting, untouched and serene.
“Oh,” you breathe, stepping out of the car, eyes wide. “Jude… it’s beautiful.”
His arms wrap around you from behind, chin resting on your shoulder. “Yeah? You like it?”
You nod, unable to find the right words.
“I wanted it to be special,” he says softly, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. “For you.”
Your throat tightens at that, and you turn in his arms, looking up at him. The sunlight catches in his eyes, turning them into molten honey, and for a moment, all you can do is stare.
“Jude…”
His fingers tilt your chin up, his gaze flickering down to your lips. “Can I kiss you?” You swoon at how he still asks.
You don’t even have to answer. You lift onto your toes, closing the space between you, and he meets you halfway, his lips capturing yours in a kiss that’s slow and deep, filled with all the things he doesn’t need to say out loud.
When you finally pull back, breathless and warm, he smiles against your lips. “Told you you’d love it.”
You laugh, heart full, and let him lead you toward the picnic he’s set up under the trees, the blanket spread out beneath the stars. It’s so romantic you could cry.
Jude wasn’t lying when he said you’d love it.
The picnic setup is nothing short of breathtaking. A thick, cozy blanket is spread over the grass, weighed down at the corners with a wicker basket, a bottle of wine, and a few lit lanterns that flicker warmly against the encroaching twilight. A small tent is pitched just a few feet away, its entrance left open, revealing plush pillows and more blankets inside. Everything about it feels intimate, private, like your own little world hidden away from everything else.
And Jude—God, Jude looks so pleased with himself, hands on his hips, watching your reaction with a boyish grin.
“You really did all this?” you ask softly, still a little stunned, still trying to process just how perfect it all is.
Jude chuckles, stepping behind you to wrap his arms around your waist, pulling you flush against him. “Of course,” he murmurs, nuzzling his nose into the crook of your neck. “Wanted to spoil my girl.”
Your face burns at that, heart skipping an entire beat. His girl. It’s ridiculous how much those two little words make you melt, how they settle so easily into your chest like they’ve always belonged there.
“I—I love it,” you manage, voice barely above a whisper. “Thank you.”
His lips graze the sensitive spot just behind your ear, and you shiver, hands gripping his forearms instinctively. “You can thank me later,” he teases, his voice laced with something dark, something promising.
Your breath hitches. “Jude.”
He just chuckles, pressing one last kiss to your neck before pulling away. “C’mon, sweetheart. Let’s eat before you get all shy on me.”
He’s right—you’re already flustered, barely holding yourself together as you kneel on the blanket. Jude joins you, opening the basket to pull out an assortment of food. There’s fresh fruit, sandwiches, some of your favorite snacks, and even ingredients for s’mores.
“You thought of everything,” you muse, watching as he uncorks the bottle of wine with practiced ease.
“‘Course I did,” he says, winking. “Gotta impress my girl.”
Your stomach flutters. You shake your head, biting your lip as you take the glass he hands you, trying to suppress the ridiculous smile threatening to take over your face.
The two of you eat leisurely, the conversation flowing as effortlessly as it always does. Jude makes you laugh until your sides ache, teasing you in that way only he can—flirty, playful, but always affectionate.
It’s easy. Being with him.
Eventually, the stars come out, a sprawling canvas of light stretching endlessly above you. You lay back on the blanket, staring up in awe, while Jude props himself up on one elbow, watching you instead.
“You brought your telescope, yeah?” he asks.
You nod, turning your head to meet his gaze. “Mhm. It’s in the car.”
Jude smirks. “Think you could teach me some constellations?”
You hum, considering. “Depends.”
“On?”
“On how well you listen.”
He grins, leaning in, his face dangerously close to yours. “I always listen to you, sweetheart.”
Your breath catches. His hand finds your hip, fingers tracing slow, lazy patterns through the fabric of your dress. “Jude…”
“Mm?”
“You’re distracting me.”
He laughs, low and deep. “Am I?”
You nod, cheeks burning. “Very much.”
Jude’s fingers tighten on your hip, just slightly, just enough for you to feel the possessiveness in the gesture. “That’s funny,” he murmurs, dipping his head so that his lips ghost over yours, not quite kissing you, just teasing. “Because you’ve been distracting me all damn night.”
Your pulse stutters. “I—I have?”
Jude exhales sharply, like he can’t believe you’d even ask. “Sweetheart,” he murmurs, pressing a lingering kiss to the corner of your mouth. “You have no idea what you do to me.”
Your hands grip at his hoodie, trying to ground yourself, trying to breathe through the sudden onslaught of heat pooling low in your stomach. “Jude,” you whisper, barely able to get his name out.
He groans, like you saying his name alone is enough to drive him insane, and then he finally closes the distance, kissing you deep and slow, like he has all the time in the world to unravel you piece by piece.
And you let him. Because it’s Jude. Because you trust him. Because he makes you feel safe even when he makes you feel like you’re coming undone.
When he finally pulls away, you’re breathless, dizzy. He rests his forehead against yours, breathing heavily, his fingers still gripping your hip like he’s afraid you’ll disappear.
“You’re gonna be the death of me,” he mutters, but he’s smiling when he says it, and you can’t help but smile too.
“You started it,” you tease, voice barely above a whisper.
Jude laughs, shaking his head. “Yeah, yeah.” He presses a quick, final kiss to your lips before rolling onto his back, staring up at the sky. “Go on, then. Teach me something.”
You giggle, reaching for his hand, lacing your fingers together. “Okay,” you say softly, squeezing his hand once. “See that bright one over there?”
Jude hums, squeezing back. “Yeah.”
“That’s Vega.”
He turns his head to look at you, eyes full of something unbearably fond. “Is it the prettiest star?”
You blink, caught off guard by the question. “Well, I—”
“Because if it is,” he interrupts, grinning, “then it makes sense why it reminds me of you.”
Your heart stutters, cheeks burning, and you groan, covering your face with your hands. “Jude.”
He laughs, warm and rich, pulling you closer until you’re curled into his side, the steady thrum of his heartbeat against your ear.
You stay like that for a couple minutes, his fingers trace lazy patterns along your arm, his warmth seeping into your skin, grounding you. You feel safe here. Cherished.
And you make your decision.
“You’re quiet,” Jude murmurs, tilting his head down to look at you. His voice is low, roughened by the night air, by the intimacy wrapped around you both like a second skin.
You swallow, nerves bubbling in your stomach. You’ve been thinking about this for weeks now, letting the thought sit in the corners of your mind, letting it grow into something more solid, more certain.
And now, in the golden glow of this moment, with the stars watching and Jude holding you like you’re his world, you finally gather the courage to say it.
“Jude…” Your voice is small, hesitant. You shift slightly so you can look up at him, your heart hammering against your ribs. “I—I think I’m ready.”
His brows furrow, lips parting slightly as he processes your words. Then his expression softens, something warm and deep flickering in his gaze. “Ready for what, sweetheart?” He knows what you're asking for. But he doesn't want to get ahead of himself, so he waits for you to confirm.
You bite your lip, fingers twisting in the fabric of the blanket. It takes everything in you to hold his gaze, but you do, because you need him to know that you mean this. That you want this.
“For… us. For that.” Your cheeks burn, and you’re sure you must look ridiculous, but Jude just watches you, patient as ever. “I want to be with you. I want you to be my first.”
For a moment, he doesn’t say anything. Just stares at you with an unreadable expression, his grip on you tightening slightly. Then, slowly, his thumb brushes over your cheek, his touch feather-light.
“Are you sure?” His voice is barely above a whisper, careful and deliberate, like he’s giving you one last chance to change your mind.
You nod, pressing your cheek into his palm. “I’ve never been more sure about anything.”
Something shifts in his gaze—something deep, something intense. His jaw tightens like he’s holding something back, but then he exhales, his hand slipping from your face to intertwine with yours.
“Okay,” he says softly. “Okay, baby.” He lifts your hand to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to your knuckles. “Let's go inside then.”
You nod and he helps you up, his movements slow and deliberate, as if he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he moves too fast. He doesn’t rush, doesn’t push. Just holds your hand as he leads you toward the tent, zipping it open and stepping aside to let you in first.
The inside is cozy, lit only by the soft glow of the lanterns Jude set up earlier. The air is warm, thick with something unspoken, something electric. You settle onto the pile of blankets and pillows, watching as Jude kneels in front of you, his hands resting on his thighs.
“You’re so beautiful,” he says, his voice barely above a breath, as if the words are meant only for you and the universe.
You duck your head, suddenly shy, but Jude doesn’t let you hide. He reaches out, tilting your chin up so your eyes meet his. “You don’t have to be nervous,” he murmurs, brushing a kiss over your cheek, then your jaw, then the corner of your lips. “I’ve got you.”
You nod, exhaling softly. “I know.”
His lips find yours then, slow and tender, like he’s savoring the moment. His hands are gentle as they slide up your arms, over your shoulders, down your back. There’s no rush, no urgency—just soft touches, soft kisses, soft whispers.
The world outside fades into nothingness, leaving only the two of you. The stars, once so distant, now feel like they're watching closely, witnesses to something both innocent and deeply intimate. His kiss deepens slowly, the pressure of his lips soft and coaxing, as if he's waiting for you to lead, to guide him through this moment. His hands are everywhere, but always with a reverence, like he's treating every inch of you as something precious.
You feel your pulse quicken under his touch, the fluttering of nerves mixing with something else, something sweet. He can sense it, too—how your breath catches every time he moves, every time his fingers graze your skin.
“Hey,” Jude murmurs against your lips, his voice a touch rougher now, laced with need. He pulls back just enough to meet your eyes, his gaze dark and intense. “It's just me, okay? Always just me.”
You nod, swallowing hard, but Jude's fingers tighten on your waist like he needs more assurance. Like he needs to hear it from you.
“Just you,” you manage, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jude's eyes flash with something like triumph, and his lips find yours again in a kiss that's soft, deep, devouring.
Jude is gentle, almost unbearably so, as he slowly tilts you back onto the pillows. The world seems to narrow to just the two of you—the rustling of the blankets beneath you, the warmth of his hands steadying your body, the quiet exhale of his breath fanning against your skin. Your hair spreads out like a halo against the sheets, and Jude just stares for a moment, his gaze roaming over you like he’s seeing you for the first time.
"Fuck baby, look at you," he murmurs, voice rough, reverent. "You don't even know how pretty you are, do you?"
You swallow hard, looking at him through wet clumpy lashes, the warmth of him overwhelming you already. Jude bites his bottom lip at the sight of you already so fucked out for him. You're so fucking pretty and he can't wait to ruin you.
Jude’s weight shifts over you as he lowers himself between your legs, his body pressing against yours in a way that steals the breath from your lungs. He’s everywhere—his scent, his warmth, the solid weight of him pressing into you in all the places you’re most sensitive. You feel him, all of him, and your lashes flutter as you try not to tremble beneath him.
His hands slide up your sides, slow and deliberate, his fingers catching the hem of your dress. He pushes the fabric up inch by inch, exposing more of your skin to the cool air, and then he makes a sound—low, almost pained.
"Jesus, sweetheart," he breathes, dipping his head to your neck. He kisses you there, soft at first, then with more intent, dragging his lips over the delicate skin until he reaches your collarbone. His mouth is hot, open-mouthed, tasting you, lingering. The smell of you putting him in a haze. "Need to taste you. Gonna let me? Mhm?"
The words send a bolt of heat straight to your core.
You nod, but the motion is shaky, your lips parted as you struggle to find your voice. "Y-yeah," you whisper, barely more than breath.
Jude smiles against your skin, finding your shyness utterly endearing. Even after all this time you're still so fucking cute. "That’s my girl," he murmurs, his fingers trailing lower.
You feel them at the edge of your panties, feel the soft tug as he starts to slide them down. Your breath hitches, and Jude pauses immediately, glancing up at you. His eyes are warm, searching.
"Hey," he murmurs, pressing a kiss just above your navel. "You okay?"
You nod again, but he doesn’t move right away. He watches you, patient, waiting for you to really settle before continuing. It’s so incredibly tender that your heart squeezes in your chest.
When he finally does pull your panties away, his breath catches. His hands part your thighs, thumbs stroking over the sensitive skin there, and he exhales like he’s been waiting his whole life for this moment. He has.
"Fuck, baby," he whispers, pressing a kiss to the inside of your thigh. "Such a pretty pussy."
Your fingers curl into the sheets as he works his way lower, his lips tracing paths of fire down your legs, teasing, deliberate. You’re already shaking by the time his breath ghosts over the sensitive skin of your mound.
"Can I kiss it, baby?" His voice is low, dark, laced with something sinful, something that makes your entire body burn.
You can’t even speak. Your lips part, but no words come out, just a soft whimper that makes Jude grin against your skin. He loves this—the way you melt for him, the way you look at him with wide, innocent eyes like you can’t believe what’s happening.
"You’ve gotta tell me, princess," he murmurs, his hands gripping your thighs, his thumbs tracing slow, soothing circles. "Need to hear you say it."
"Y-yeah," you stammer, barely audible, but it’s enough.
Jude groans, his lips pressing one last kiss to your inner thigh before finally, finally—
The first touch of his mouth is pure ecstacy. You gasp, your body jolting against the bed, and Jude hums in approval. His tongue moves slowly, languidly, savoring every inch of you like you’re the sweetest thing he’s ever tasted. You are.
"God, baby," he groans into you, his voice vibrating against your skin. "Taste so fucking good. Could stay here all night."
His hands slide beneath your thighs, pulling you closer, tilting your hips just right so he can get even deeper. His tongue flicks over your clit, teasing, and your entire body tenses. Your fingers shoot to his hair, gripping onto the dark coils as if they’re the only thing keeping you tethered to reality.
Jude chuckles, and the sound is pure sin. "That good, huh?"
You let out a broken whimper, your head tipping back, your cheeks burning. He’s watching you—God, he’s watching you. His eyes flicker up to meet yours, dark and hungry, and the sight alone is enough to make your stomach twist with want.
"Look at you," he murmurs, licking into you again, slow and deep. "So fucking pretty when you let go for me."
You squeeze your eyes shut, overwhelmed, but he’s not having it. One of his hands moves up your body, sliding beneath your dress until he finds your hand, lacing his fingers through yours.
"Don’t hide from me, sweetheart," he murmurs against your skin. "Wanna see you. Wanna watch you fall apart."
And you do.
With every stroke of his tongue, every whispered praise against your skin, and wet slick sound of his mouth, your body coils tighter, your breath coming in sharp little pants. It feels like you’re being pulled apart at the seams, every nerve on fire, and it’s terrifying, overwhelming, but Jude—he’s there, holding you, grounding you, whispering sweet nothings against your pussy.
When he flicks his tongue over your clit once more, you lose it.
Your body convulses, your thighs squeezing around him, and Jude holds you through it all, his tongue never ceasing its motion. He groans against your skin, his hand gripping your thigh hard, but you barely feel it. All you can do is sob his name, your head tipping back in a silent scream, your body shaking with the force of your orgasm.
Jude stays with you through it all—licking, sucking, slowly bringing you down from the high. He doesn’t stop until your body finally relaxes against the mattress, limp and warm and pliant. Then he moves up your body in a slow, languid crawl, lips dragging over your skin, kissing everything he passes. His fingers find your hair, stroking it back from your face, and then his mouth meets yours.
You're still reeling from what he's done, from the way he’s touched you, taken you apart like he was born to do it. Your body is thrumming, heat pooling low in your belly, and yet Jude’s kiss is gentle—softer than you expect, coaxing you back to reality, back to him.
He tastes like you—salt and sweetness mixed into something heady and intoxicating. The taste of him makes you whimper against his lips, and he swallows the sound like it’s his favorite thing in the world.
"Hi, baby," he murmurs, his nose brushing against yours, lips barely ghosting over your mouth as he speaks. "Still with me?"
You hum, nodding shyly, your fingers fisting the sheets beside you.
Jude grins against your lips, his voice turning teasing. "Good girl."
His words send a ripple of warmth through you, but before you can say anything, he leans back, arms flexing as he peels his shirt off in one smooth motion. The sight of him, shirtless and breathtaking, has your breath hitching. His body is all lean muscle, defined and golden brown. Spit pools in your mouth, and you have to swallow quickly to stop from embarrassing yourself.
Jude notices. Of course, he does. His smirk is knowing, his dark eyes full of mischief as he tosses the shirt aside.
"Like what you see, sweetheart?" he teases, voice dipping low, sinful.
Your face burns, but you can’t look away.
His laughter is soft, affectionate. "You’re too cute," he murmurs, brushing his fingers over your flushed cheek before dipping lower, reaching for the hem of your dress. His knuckles graze your skin, making you shiver. "Let’s get this off you."
Before you can protest, the fabric is slipping over your head and then—then you’re bare for him.
The moment stretches, thick with anticipation. You shift slightly, suddenly shy under his gaze, but Jude just looks at you like you’re a masterpiece, like he’s afraid to blink in case you disappear.
"Fuck," he breathes, his voice rough, reverent. "You're so fucking pretty."
You barely have time to register his words before his lips are back on yours—hotter this time, more insistent. There’s no hesitation now, no teasing restraint. He kisses you like he’s starved, like he’s trying to consume every last bit of you.
You gasp against his mouth, arching into him, needing more, and he groans, gripping your thigh and pulling it over his hip. The new angle has you feeling him more, the thick press of his cock through his pants sending sparks of desire shooting straight to your core.
"Jude," you whisper, breathless.
He presses his forehead to yours, his breathing ragged. "I know, baby," he murmurs, rolling his hips against yours. The friction is maddening, sinful. You moan, and he catches the sound with his mouth, swallowing it greedily.
"You're so soft," he whispers, his hands roaming, fingertips dragging over your skin like he’s memorizing every inch of you. "So warm." Another roll of his hips, slow and deliberate. "I need you, baby."
His words send a shiver down your spine, heat curling deep inside you.
Jude’s mouth finds your throat, pressing open-mouthed kisses down to your chest. His hands follow, palms covering your breasts, kneading softly before his thumbs brush over your nipples. The sensation is too much, not enough, all at once.
You whimper, your hands flying to his shoulders, clutching him.
"You're so sensitive," Jude mutters, voice thick with want. He pinches one of your nipples lightly, watching as you jolt beneath him. "Makes me so fucking hard."
His words are filthy, but instead of making you shy away, they send another wave of heat pooling between your legs.
Your eyes flicker downward, and you see it—see the thick outline of him straining against his pants. Your breath catches.
"Take them off," you whisper, surprising yourself.
Jude stills, his gaze snapping to yours, surprised. Then, he smirks, but there’s something darker, hungrier beneath it. "Yeah?"
You nod, biting your lip.
He doesn’t need to be told twice. In one swift motion, he kicks off his pants and boxer briefs, and then he’s bare before you.
Your breath stutters. He’s—God.
Thick, veiny and oh so hard.
Your thighs press together instinctively, and Jude notices. His smirk grows, but there’s a softness in his eyes, too. He leans down, brushing a kiss to your jaw, your cheek, your nose.
But then—
"Shit." He suddenly freezes, his face scrunching in frustration. "I don’t have condoms."
You blink, his words slow to register through the haze of desire clouding your mind.
Jude groans, dragging a hand through his hair. "Fuck, I’m so sorry. I didn’t think we’d be doing this tonight."
You hesitate, then swallow your nerves. "It’s okay," you murmur. You reach down, wrapping your fingers around him, feeling the warmth, the weight of him in your palm. He sucks in a sharp breath. "I’m on birth control."
"Sweetheart," he groans, his hips jerking slightly into your hand. "Don’t do that."
But you do. You stroke him slowly, experimentally, fascinated by the way his breathing stutters, the way his jaw clenches like he’s barely holding himself together.
Jude curses under his breath, his head dropping to your shoulder. "You’re gonna make me cum if you keep that up."
You hum softly, dragging your thumb over the tip, spreading the precum leaking out. He chokes on a groan, his hands gripping your hips tight.
You’ve never seen him like this—so undone, so desperate.
And God, you love it.
"Please, baby," he rasps, his voice thick with need. "Squeeze tighter for me."
You bite your lip as you obey, watching him through your lashes. He’s so big, so hard for you. Your walls clenches just thinking about it, a rush of slick flooding your core.
Jude notices. His eyes flick down to where your thighs press together, and then the last of his control snaps.
He grabs your wrist, pulling your hand away from him.
His hands slide down, tracing the curve of your waist before gripping your thighs, spreading them open carefully.
"Tell me if it hurts, sweetheart," he murmurs, reaching down to stroke himself. He brushes his lips over your forehead, your nose, your cheeks, soothing you in every way he can. "I’ll stop if you need me to. I’ll take care of you, I promise."
You believe him. You always have.
Then, he shifts, and you feel him at your entrance, his heavy gaze locked between your thighs. A nervous breath hitches in your throat, your fingers fisting into the sheets. Jude notices, of course he does, and his lips curve into a teasing smirk.
“Relax, sweetheart,” he murmurs, his voice low and sweet like honey. “I got you.”
You nod, though your body remains tense, overwhelmed by his closeness, by the way his touch ignites something deep inside you. Then, he moves the head of his cock over your clit, slow and deliberate, rubbing lazy circles that have your breath stuttering. The sensation is new, foreign yet delicious, and just as you’re adjusting to the pleasure, he taps it against your swollen bud, making you jolt.
A soft gasp escapes you, your fingers gripping the sheets tighter.
“Jesus fuck,” he groans, shaking his head as he watches how his thick head glides easily between your slick folds. The sound it makes makes you bury you face in his shoulder “You’re so wet, baby. All fucking mine.”
His words send a rush of heat through your body, your cheeks burning as you turn your face to the side, too shy to meet his gaze. But Jude isn’t having it. He cups your chin gently, coaxing you to look at him.
“Don’t hide from me,” he whispers, pressing a tender kiss to your lips.
The hunger in his voice makes you clench and he groans at the feeling. Then, he’s pressing in, the thick head pushing past your entrance, stretching you in a way that makes you suck in a sharp breath. Your lashes flutter, but Jude’s there, his eyes locked on yours, his lips brushing reassuring kisses over your nose, your cheek.
“I know,” he murmurs. “I know, baby.”
He slides in further, slow, slow. You feel yourself spreading around his girth, the feeling of fullness intense but not quite painful. The dull pressure borders on discomfort, but Jude doesn’t rush you. He moves slowly, carefully, inch by inch, pausing to let you adjust, his hands soothing over your sides.
“You’re doing so good for me, baby,” he praises, his lips brushing over your cheek, your jaw, down to your throat. “Just breathe. I’ve got you.”
You exhale shakily, trying to relax as he pushes deeper. There’s a slight burn, your body resisting the intrusion, but the way Jude watches you—so patient, so gentle—eases the tension. He strokes your thigh, his thumb rubbing slow, reassuring circles into your skin.
“Almost there, sweetheart,” he murmurs, brushing a stray strand of hair from your damp forehead. His voice is wrecked, thick with restraint. “God, you feel so fucking good. So warm, so tight.”
Your nails dig into his back as he finally sinks in all the way, filling you completely. A whimper leaves your lips, overwhelmed by the stretch, by the feeling of being utterly, entirely full. Jude stills immediately, concern flickering across his face.
“Too much?” he asks, his thumb brushing your cheek.
You shake your head quickly, blinking up at him. “No—just… full,” you admit breathlessly, your voice barely above a whisper.
His expression softens, pressing a kiss to your temple, his lips lingering there.
He doesn’t move, just holds you, letting you adjust at your own pace. His lips find your neck, trailing slow, reverent kisses down to your collarbone. His hands never stop moving, caressing your thighs, your hips, your waist—everywhere. It helps, the ache easing into something warmer, something better.
You shift slightly beneath him, testing the sensation, and a tiny moan escapes you at the delicious friction. Jude groans, his fingers tightening on your hips like he’s barely holding on.
“Fuck,” he rasps, his forehead dropping to your shoulder. “You’re so fucking tight. Pussy feels like heaven, baby.”
His words send a fresh wave of heat through you, making you squirm in embarrassment. You bury your face against his neck, but he only chuckles, pressing a kiss to the shell of your ear.
“Don’t be shy,” he coaxes, his voice laced with amusement. “I wanna hear you, sweetheart.”
His hands slide down to your hips, gripping them gently as he pulls out, slow and careful, before sinking back in. The friction sends a shiver up your spine, something new and intoxicating unfurling in your belly. Your breath stutters, your fingers digging into his shoulders.
Jude watches you closely, his eyes dark and heated. Then, his lips twitch into a knowing grin.
“There it is,” he murmurs, his voice thick with pride. “You like that, baby?”
Your cheeks flame, but the pleasure is too much to deny. You nod, barely able to form words, and Jude groans, dropping his head to your collarbone as he fights to keep himself together.
“Fuck, this pussy,” the last sound drags out as his jaw goes slack. “fucking made for me.”
His thrusts remain slow, deep, every roll of his hips sending a ripple of pleasure through you. It’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before, a sensation you can’t begin to describe. Every brush of his skin against yours sends sparks of sensation through your body.
It’s not long before you find yourself moving with him, arching beneath him, searching for more. He hums in approval, his teeth nipping gently at your neck as he thrusts into you deeper, harder. You cry out, a high whimper, and Jude swallows it greedily.
You’re completely lost in the sensation of him, the way he moves above you like a dream, like a vision. The way his lips drag over your skin, the soft praise against your ear, the heavy weight of him on top of you. It all feels so good, so overwhelming, that you find yourself clinging to him, your arms wrapping around his shoulders like he’s the only thing that exists in this moment.
Jude growls, his mouth finding yours as he kisses you hard, deep. He fucks you into the mattress, hard and fast, rougher than he ever thought he’d be with you. But you—it’s like you were made for him, like your body was built for this, for his cock.
And it makes him crazy.
“Fuuuckk,” he rasps into your mouth, your lips barely parting for words. “Gonna cum for me? Hm?”
He slips a hand down between your bodies, his fingers finding your clit. He strokes it, hard, slow circles that make you cry out. Your walls clench around him as he rubs you faster—it’s like the best thing you’ve ever felt.
And then…
"Oh, fuck! Jude!" you cry out, your back concaving into him as his tip grazes a spot that has tears spilling down your cheeks. You can only describe it as pure ecstasy and he’s not letting up. “Oh, God. Oh, God”
Jude curses, his hips moving faster, thrusting into your gspot over and over again. You’re sobbing now, "Found it."Jude whispers, a triumphant smirk spreading across his face as he angles his hips to hit that sweet spot over and over. You're getting so close, your body’s a live wire, waiting to snap.
“Jude—fuck! I-I’m gonna cum!” you sob.
His hand tightens on your hip, his fingers bruising. “Then cum, baby,” he grunts, his own body tense, close. “Let me feel it. Cum for me, sweetheart. Fucking milk my cock.”
The filthy words send you over the edge, your body arching as waves of pleasure crash over you, a force so intense it steals the air from your lungs. Your fingers clutch at Jude’s broad shoulders, nails pressing into his flushed skin, as a broken sob falls from your lips. The pleasure is overwhelming—too much, too deep, too consuming—but you surrender to it, trembling as your body spasms around him.
"That’s it, love," Jude groans, his voice rough with desperation, his fingers tangling with yours as he pins your hands above your head, holding you there, helpless beneath him. “Jude,” you gasp, voice trembling, eyes glazed over with pleasure.
The sight of you—flushed, trembling, your lips parted in a breathless moan—Your slick gummy walls spasm around him, clenching tight, and it’s all Jude needs to follow you into the abyss of bliss.
A deep, guttural groan rumbles from his chest, his head tipping back as his thrusts turn frantic, desperate, chasing his own pleasure. You watch as his eyes roll back and his jaw goes slack as his mouth forms an 'O'. “Fuckkkk,” he grits out, his entire body shuddering. “That’s it, princess. Love this fuckin’ pussy.”
His hips stutter, his thick cock jerks inside you once, twice, then he’s gone—spilling deep inside of you with a strangled moan. You feel it—the warmth of him, thick and hot, filling you up completely. His body trembles against yours as he collapses, his chest pressing against your own, heartbeat wild and erratic.
For a few moments, there’s nothing but the sound of your mingled breaths, the cool night air brushing over your sweat-slicked skin. The world outside the tent is quiet, save for the occasional chirp of crickets or the distant rustling of leaves.
Jude’s nose brushes against your temple, his lips following in a lazy path along your hairline, down your cheek, over your jaw. He peppers soft kisses across your skin, like he can’t bear to stop touching you. His arms tighten around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer, like he’s afraid you might slip away.
You blink up at him, your vision still hazy, your body still trembling from the aftershocks. And then, unexpectedly, a giggle bubbles past your lips.
Jude stirs, lifting his head to look down at you with a lopsided grin. His honey brown eyes are filled with amusement, mischief, and something far softer—something that makes your stomach flip.
“What are you laughin’ at, princess?” His voice is hoarse, still rough with pleasure and a hint of exhaustion. His thumb strokes slow circles over your hipbone.
You shake your head, a little breathless, still giddy. “That was…” You pause, searching for the right words, but nothing feels like enough. Your cheeks burn as you hide your face against his shoulder. “I don’t even know how to describe it.”
Jude chuckles, the deep sound vibrating against your skin. “I think I do.”
You peek up at him, curiosity flickering in your dazed gaze. “Yeah?”
He hums, pressing another slow, lingering kiss to your lips before pulling back just enough to study your face, propping himself up on one elbow so he can look down at you, his fingers tracing absentminded circles against your skin
“It was,” he starts, dragging the moment out, watching the way your lips part slightly, the way your lashes flutter. He smirks. “Pretty fuckin’ perfect.”
Your blush deepens, and you swat at his chest, but your hand has no real strength behind it. “Jude,” you whine, embarrassed, but he only laughs, catching your wrist and bringing it to his lips. He presses a kiss to your palm, then your fingertips, his eyes never leaving yours.
“I mean it,” he murmurs, voice lower now, more serious. “You’re perfect.”
Your heart stumbles, skipping a beat before thudding heavily against your ribs. You swallow, suddenly shy, suddenly overwhelmed by the depth of emotion in his gaze.
The way he's looking at you now. It's too much.
“I…” Your throat feels tight, words catching. But Jude just smiles, like he understands, like he doesn’t need you to say anything at all.
He shifts, rolling onto his side making you wince as you remember he's still inside you, bringing you with him so that you’re tucked against his chest, your leg draped over his hip, your face buried in the crook of his neck. His fingers trace lazy patterns down your spine, soothing, grounding.
It's so intimate; knowing that's he's inside you, the warmth of him filling you completely as you involuntarily clench around him. The knowledge of his cum still inside you and the slight burn from the stretch that's making your hips sore.
Jude groans quietly, his head tipping back at the overstimulation, his eyes falling closed as he tries to calm himself down. “Hold on, love, just a second.” He hisses out a breath and reaches down to grasp himself at the base before gently pulling out, whispering sweet nothings and soft apologies at the wince you let out.
The feeling of emptiness is immediate, your walls clenching, but you say nothing, just bite your lip and look away as Jude reaches for his shirt. He wipes himself clean before he getting up. You watch with confusion as he slips on his boxers and slides out of the tent. But it's not long before he's back. He crawls back inside with a wet cloth, a small bowl of fruits you packed earlier and your water bottle. He sits down next to you with a soft smile, the cloth held out in his hands. Your cheeks grow warm as you realize what he’s doing.
“Spread your legs for me, princess .” His voice is soft, gentle. He waits patiently for you to do as he asks, and the way his eyes soften as you listen… It makes tears well up in your eyes. To be taken care of like this—is beyond what you expected. He cleans you gently before he sets the cloth down and reaches for the bowl of fruit.
His eyes light up as he holds a grape to your lips and you accept it with a giggle. He hands you a slice of apple next, and you take a bite, smiling softly at the sight of his relaxed expression. It's like nothing else exists, like only you two are here in the moment. After you finish your snack, he holds out your water bottle and you thank him as you take a long drink.
Jude watches you with something dangerously close to adoration, his gaze flickering over your face like he’s memorizing every little thing—your flushed cheeks, your sleepy eyes, the way your lips glisten as you sip from the bottle. His fingers trail absentmindedly over your thigh, warm and soothing, tracing lazy patterns onto your skin.
“You okay, love?” he murmurs, his voice thick with something soft, something that makes your chest feel too tight.
You nod, still shy, still unsure what to do with all the emotions swirling inside you.
Jude must sense it, must see the way you hesitate, the way your fingers fidget in your lap. He tilts your chin up with the barest touch of his fingers, forcing you to meet his gaze. His thumb brushes over your lower lip, his expression unreadable.
"You're thinkin' too much," he teases gently. "Wanna tell me what's goin' on in that pretty little head of yours?"
You hesitate, your throat bobbing as you swallow. But under his gaze, so open and patient, you find yourself whispering, "Just… I don’t know how to explain it." Your fingers toy with the hem of the blanket, suddenly fascinated by the texture. "I just feel… full."
His brows lift, and for a second, a wicked smirk plays at the corners of his lips. “Full, huh?”
Your eyes widen as you catch the meaning, and you smack his arm with an indignant squeak. "Not like that, Jude!"
His laugh rumbles deep in his chest, rich and warm, and you feel it against your cheek where you’ve buried your face again, hiding. His arms wrap around you, pulling you against him with ease, his lips brushing against your temple.
"Alright, alright," he murmurs, amusement still thick in his voice. "I’ll behave."
You huff, but the way his fingers thread through your hair, his touch slow and methodical, makes your body melt against him. He presses a kiss to your forehead, then your nose, then your lips, taking his time with each one like he’s savoring the taste of you.
“You feel full,” he echoes, more serious now, as if he’s trying to understand. "Full of what, love?"
Your lashes flutter as you blink up at him, "I love you, Jude Bellingham ."
His eyes widen, a flicker of surprise crossing his features, but then a softness takes over, and his arms tighten, his hands cupping your face with such gentle care.
“Y/N Y/L/N” His voice is low, raspy, filled with something deep and real. "I love you too. More than I ever thought it was possible to feel. You’re my everything, Y/N. I never wanna spend another night without you in my arms. Every day without you feels too long, too much, too wrong. Will you marry me?"
The world slows, the weight of his words sinking into your bones, melting into the marrow. You blink, stunned, your breath caught somewhere between your ribs as your heart hammers wildly against your chest.
He shifts slightly, one arm still wrapped around you, the other reaching into the pocket of his discarded jeans. You watch, wide-eyed, as he pulls out a small velvet box. The soft glow of the lantern casts golden hues on his face, highlighting the nervous anticipation in his warm brown eyes.
“Jude…” Your voice is barely a whisper, your fingers trembling as you reach up, touching his cheek as if to confirm it’s real and not some dream spun from the afterglow of your love.
He smiles, tilting his head just slightly into your touch, his thumb tracing gentle circles against the small of your back. “Yeah, love. It’s real,” he murmurs, as if reading your thoughts. “Been carryin’ this around for weeks, waitin’ for the right time. And I realized… there’s no better time than right now.”
He flicks open the box, revealing a delicate ring, the band slender and elegant, a diamond nestled in its center, catching the lantern light and scattering it in tiny flecks across the canvas of the tent. Your breath catches, tears welling in your eyes, blurring the sight of it.
“Y/N, you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” he says, his voice steady, thick with emotion. “I know we haven't been together long, but I can’t live without you. Every single day, you make me happier than I ever thought I deserved. I love you. I love your shy little smiles, the way you tuck your face into my neck when you get flustered. I love the way you look at me like I hung the stars, when really, you’re the one that lights up my whole world.”
A soft, overwhelmed sound escapes your lips, something between a laugh and a sob, and he grins, his dimples carving into his cheeks.
“You don’t have to say yes right now,” he adds quickly, as if he’s worried you might feel pressured, as if he can’t bear to see even a hint of hesitation in your eyes. “I just… I want you to know that I’m all in. I wanna be yours for the rest of my life. Whenever you’re ready, whenever you want me—I’m here.”
Your hands shake as you reach for the box, fingers barely brushing the velvet before you shift, pressing forward, wrapping yourself around him as best as you can. Your lips find his—soft, eager, trembling against his own. He catches your breathy gasp with a quiet groan, deepening the kiss, his hands firm at your waist, pulling you impossibly close.
When you finally pull away, you’re breathless, your forehead resting against his. “Yes,” you whisper, voice thick with emotion. “Yes, Jude. I want you—I want forever with you.”
The way his face lights up, the way pure joy radiates from him—it steals the very breath from your lungs. “Yeah?” His voice wavers just slightly, disbelief laced into the happiness.
You nod fervently, laughing softly as tears slip down your cheeks. “Yes. A million times, yes.”
A sound rumbles in his chest—something between relief and elation—as he slips the ring onto your finger, his hands shaking slightly. And then he’s kissing you again, laughing against your lips, his hands tangling in your hair, his body pressing you back down onto the soft blanket beneath you.
“You’ve just made me the happiest man alive, love.” His voice is warm, reverent, as his lips trail along your jaw, down the column of your throat. His fingers find your hand, threading through yours, the cool metal of your new ring pressing against his skin. “I swear, I’ll spend every day making sure you never regret saying yes to me.”
You smile, your free hand slipping into his curls, tugging just slightly until he looks up at you, his eyes dark with something deep, something infinite. “I could never regret you, Jude.”
His breath stutters, and then he’s kissing you again, deep and slow, his love spilling from his lips, from the way his hands trace over your skin.
When he finally pulls away, you’re dazed, breathless, your fingers still curled into his like you don’t want him to go too far.
Jude chuckles, resting his forehead against yours again. “Gotta say, camping’s never been this fun before.”
You giggle, and the sound makes something warm bloom in his chest.
“I think I like it too,” you admit, your voice small, “Especially… with you.”
His arms tighten around you, and when he speaks next, his voice is quieter, raw with something unspoken.
“Good. ‘Cause I plan on makin’ a lot more memories with you, princess.” He tilts his head just enough to steal another soft kiss. “Forever and always, huh?”
“Forever and always,” you echo, smiling into the next kiss.
-Bianca🌻
#footballer x reader#jude x you#jude bellingham#jude x reader#jude bellingham x reader#jb5#jb5 x reader
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Ryoman Sukuna x Reader

Description: Reader wants to get her cherries pierced but is a bit of a bimbo once paired with her brute of a piercer, Ryoman Sukuna. He pierced and popped her cherry from the back seat of his black BMW I7, leaving her with the question: What piercing should she get next? ~ ♥
Content Warning: Car sex, description of cramped spaces, swearing as always!
Word count: 10,637

This would be your first "rebellious" action that Mommy and Daddy wouldn't approve of; you wanted more "sex appeal," being a virgin well into adulthood wasn't anything to brag about. So that lovely sunny Saturday morning, you woke up and decided to get your nipples pierced! Then You showered, brushed your teeth and hair You headed out of your house and to the best-reviewed piercing shop, reading the reviews on the walk there. A few customers complained about one employee named Ryoman Sukuna. One review said he called her "a bitch" and told her to get out after she showed the design. Another one read when he was doing this woman's clit piercing, he didn't care when she asked for privacy, saying she should "suck it up; your getting it for a reason."
You sigh and speak to yourself, "As long as my piercer isn't Ryoman Sukuna, I'll be fine." Then you hear a deep sigh. "Why don't you want the owner of the shop to pierce you?" You gasp and quickly turn around, and it was a man with long black hair. He had deep purple eyes and piercings littering his body. He held a drink carrier with four coffees, all made differently. "Um, have you seen these reviews!?" You asked, holding the phone to him, "Yeahhh, I've seen. I work there, and Sukuna is rugged, but no one does their job like him," and he starts walking away. You chase after him, "Wait!?" and you start walking with him. "Really? I'm going there right now. How good do you say?" You ask, "Well, he can do any tattoo in any style, and he's quick—maybe two sessions for a sleeve," the man said before you interject, "What about pain and straightness of piercing?" "Like I told you, Sukuna, the best of the best in the moment it isn't that painful, but it depends on what piercing too?" "Well, what about nipples?" you whisper. The man snickers, "Sukuna does them well, but the issue is privacy, he doesn't understand some piercings people don't want to show to everyone." You nod. "What's your name?" you ask, staring up at him. "Geto," and before you know it, you both arrive.
You follow Geto inside, and he walks over to a man with white hair and bright blue eyes and hands him some caramel frozen drink. "Here you go, Satoru," and the white-haired man kisses his cheek and leaves the shop. "That's Gojo; he doesn't actually work here." Geto said softly, rubbing his cheek, then he walked over to one of the stations. "Choso!" Choso walks out. "Here's your hot cocoa." Geto hands him the warm drink. "Thanks," Choso said. He had tattoos and pale skin with two twin pigtails. "Are you still tattooing someone?" "Uh, yeah." Choso said quietly; his voice was monotone he seemed unsure quickly dismissing himself, he walked back behind the curtain. Geto shrugs and turns to you, "Well, it looks like the boss will be piercing you today." "Geto! Why can't you do it?" you ask. "Oh, I'm off the clock. I don't even work today; I've got a date with Satoru," and then you cut him off. "Well, when do you? I'll come back!"
"Geto." A deep voice said it sounded irritated. You and Geto both turned around, and there he was, the man you heard about in the reviews: "brutish," "tall, pink hair." "Black tattoos all over his face and body and an eyebrow piercing?" "Extremely handsome and horribly rude!!" You thought back to the comments; they were all right; he was handsome! He snags the black coffee from the holder before Geto speaks up, "Sukuna, mind doing a favor for me?" "What is it?" "Pierce this girl in private; she's a friend of mine," Geto said as he gently shoved your lower back towards Sukuna. "Ugh, what do you want woman?" Your mind went blank, staring into his gaze, and you shuddered out, "M-my cherries!..."
This cause Geto to snicker behind you and Sukuna runs a hand down his face "Choso is using the only privacy we have in here" Sukuna says rolling his eyes and rubbing his temples like this was causing him a headache. "There's always your car," Geto interrupts before turning to you and nudging your side with his elbow. "He has a nice car; it will be comfortable for you." Sukuna groans and starts walking away, but he turns over his shoulder. "Give me 10 minutes to set up." Geto pats your back. "See, he's not so bad." "Definitely scary," you whisper. Geto and you continue to talk.
Before Sukuna came back, "I'm ready for you." You wave to Geto, "Have fun on your date!" Sukuna watches you out of the corner of his eye and brings you to a back alley. "It's getting dark already?" You said finally you both stopped at a black BMW I7. "Get in," Sukuna groans. "This is your car. Whoa, this is super nice!" You blushed, embarrassed by how stupid you sound. Sukuna gets in the back after you, and turns on the car light. The car was so small with someone like him so large next to you forcing you to feel the heat radiating off him.
"Take your shirt off for me?" You freeze and look away. Pulling off your hoodie, leaving you in your bra, your shaky fingers pop off the clips, letting your bra slide down your shoulders, freeing your chest. This made Sukuna smile, his canines sharp. "Got to get your nipples hard" You knew this was professional, but something about it felt so dirty. You went silent as Sukuna put ice on your nipples. His finger softly pinches and rubs your left nipple. Sukuna speaks up, "So why is a woman like you getting your "cherries done?"" You blush and look away. "Forget I said cherries…and because I want to." "Yeah, sure," he said, switching nipples. "What do you mean by "Woman like you""? you ask, watching him. "A woman who's painfully and a clear virgin." "Hey, what's wrong with being a virgin!" You said before your face falls, "How did you know?" "It's easy really…" he said, his hand grabbing something. "You were scared to show me your small tits and you're extremely sensitive." He rolled his eyes before a sharp pain made you gasp, and you looked down as he quickly puts in the jewelry behind the needle he sat up straighter, sighing and looking away disinterestedly. "You did that so quick!" You sniffle, and Sukuna's head tilts; his large hand wipes your single tear.
"The healing process hurts much more," he sighs and continues, "so the idea is you think these piercings will get you more action, hm?" You whimper, "I guess..." You whisper, "It won't work on everyone," You take a moment to process what Sukuna meant. "I don't understand?" Sukuna snickers, "You really are dumb." Sukuna pulls you into his lap, making you press very clearly on his hard-on. "Comfortable?" Sukuna asks you to nod, and he quickly pierces the other nipple. This time you stare at his concentrated face. The way his eyebrows furrowed, his eyes blank, the way he does it quickly to not disturb you and as precise as possible, Geto was right; no one does their job like Ryomen Sukuna. "You're amazing!" you ramble. Sukuna just smirks, "Great, now you can pay me, with this last cherry." He smiles once more, flashing you that sharp grin. Sliding in the jewelry for the second nipple.
"Only one more cherry that needs to be attended to," you whimper. "Aww, are your piercings feeling sore already? Don't worry; let me make you focus on something else." Sukuna pulls off your sweatpants, deliberately letting his fingers drag down your thighs. His hand wanders back to the lace of your panties; his index and thumb play with the dainty fabric. "So pretty, I just want to ruin it" he whispers, before he takes the underwear off of you and tosses it to the front of the car. His fingers press into your thigh, pulling it back, letting his left-hand wander to your lips. A soft gasp leaves you as his middle finger slides into your pussy with the faintest squelch. "Mhm? Different than yours, right?" Sukuna teased. Sukuna began to move his fingers, making you whimper and bite your lip. "Come on, let me hear you; don't be a bitch." He scissored his fingers, tilting the angle to hit that spongy spot, making you moan, head tilted to rest on his shoulder. "Y-yes, so different. Hngh—Sukunaa!" You stuttered out, making him chuckle darkly. "Got to make this pussy sloppy before I fuck you, huh?" "Ah—yes, yes!" you blabber as Sukuna pushes in a second finger, adding to the stretch. "Making you more stupid, aren't I?" A jolt of electricity going through your body "YES!" before your pleasure came to a halt. Sukuna pulls his fingers out before roughly shoving your back to the middle console in-between the seats. "Be a good girl and wait there." You complied watching as he unbuckles his belt, pulling the leather from his waist and shoving the fabric of his baggy jeans and boxers down. He slaps the spongy tip against your soaking pussy before slipping the tip in. A painful hiss erupts from your throat. "Does it hurt?" He snickers but rubbing your back in a soothing manner. "Y-yes," you whisper as he pushes more in. "Then it means it's working, woman."
Finally, he bottomed out; it was twisted how much you liked it as his hips pulled back and slammed into you, moaning as the increasing pleasure overwhelmed you. The small car shook: the inside was warm and smelled of sex. Your moaning droned out the radio that played some shitty pop song on low. Sukuna continued to pound you into the center console. He loomed over you in the cramped car. "Feel good, angel?" Sukuna pushes your legs back, placing you in a mean mating press, his cock repeatedly slamming into your cervix. "Come on, answer me, you've got it" he grins. "Yes, yes—I'm going to cum. So deep." you replied stupid "Already?" Sukuna teased his hips, speeding up till you gushed around his cock, dumbly blabbering, Sukuna's hips don't falter till he cums. He tossed you a small towel from his back seat. He looked away. "Hurry up; I will drive you home." You looked up, kind of shocked he knew you walked here. "Uh, how—" Sukuna cut you off. "Well, you were worried about how dark it was." "I guessed either way I'd drive you home." Sukuna pulls up his pants and throws you your bottoms and top purposely forgetting your panties, and he looks away almost bored-like, but you had a feeling he wasn't actually bored. You dressed, already scooting closer to Sukuna. "This is your love language, isn't it?" "I don't know what you're talking about!?" He shoves you, his ears cherry red. You just cling onto his arm. "What should I get done next, Sukuna?" "Cookie for sure. I'd like to work up close with that." Sukuna chuckles to himself. His smug grin makes you slap his arm. "No," Sukuna brushes your hair out of your face. What about your nose?" You nod. "Yes, definitely! Promise to pierce me next time, Sukuna?" Sukuna rolls his eye but still puts out his pinky. "I promise," and he looks away, the tips of his ears red once more. You link pinks...

omg, I'm sorry this took so long to come out!! I just am such a perfectionist to my core; also, requests are open!!! Thank you again for reading!!!
-Bunny ♥
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#fanfic#ryomen sukuna#sukuna#i need him#choso kamo#geto suguru#jjk geto#gojo satoru#jujutsu sukuna#jjk sukuna#jjk smut#sukuna smut#jjk x you#bugixxxbunny
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𝕏𝕆𝕏𝕆, 𝔽𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕩.
Felix Catton + fem!reader. Warnings : Cussing. Drugs. Long.
My other Felix fics, if you have the time.
this might be one of my favourite things i've written. hope you enjoy! happy v-day💌
You do NOT have permission to repost and/or translate any of my fics.


Desc. : You don't want to fix him, but you do, anyway.
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Okay, okay, so he beat someone up on campus, so fucking what?
It's called being a good fucking person. Look, you do not let some utter chav get away with cat-calling a girl in the middle of the dining hall, and then a frat party, where she might have been roofied if she'd have been dumber (thank god she wasn't), and in a fucking library, just because she couldn't cause a scene. Three strikes and he was out.
But apparently, so was Felix.
"No, Sir, I'm telling you, he was--'
"Professor Walker."
Professor. Asshole. "Professor. I apologise. Professor, I'm telling you, he was being absolutely dodgy!"
"Mr. Catton, I'd advise you to stay calm--"
His fist slammed on the table, the pens on this useless waste of a PhD's desk bouncing, seemingly in tune with Felix's blood pressure. "YOU are a philosophy professor, yeah? Don't bloody talk about practical shite to me, and don't tell me what to do about what happens in the real world, when your whole career is telling people to overthink everything and keep their heads in the clouds!"
Uh, whoops.
His adrenaline shot down as fast as it had shot up and all of a sudden, he was acutely aware of his ranking in this shithole.
Student.
He's lucky he wasn't expelled.
Because the philosophy 'professor' said "young minds often reject new ideas".
Figures.
He got let off with a warning, an extremely disappointed voicemail from his mother (Felix, dear, you know philosophy was my major, that was a horrid joke to make), to sit in on one month's worth of philosophy lectures - surprisingly, without charge - and a mandatory weekly anger management session for the rest of the academic year.
That last bit was what he was most chagrined about.
He did not need a bloody shrink. GOD. He was fine. He just couldn't handle the philosophy 'professor' telling him to 'stay calm' when he was perfectly calm. Maybe he knew that would set him off. Any class with Felix in it is sure to get more listeners. So maybe it was this Professor Walker mooching off his campus-wide popularity.
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Having to miss classes wasn't exactly on your bucket list, but your body was far less used to Oxford winters than you'd expected, and so the flu decided to scrape a week off your lectures. You made up for it, though, being a swot on your first free week of Uni, and not needing to catch up on much.
However, there was definitely no chance your professor took too kindly to your absence, seeing as psychology was your major, and she expected you to be there, rain, hail or shine. Star student, you were not, but the only one taking it seriously, you were.
So here you were, sitting in front of her as she regarded you. "You need extra credit."
"Yes, Professor."
"Your career path?"
"Uh... undecided."
"Career focus?"
"Psychology.' That, you knew.
She hummed, shaking a packet of sugar before ripping the corner. You watched the tiny, crystalline cubes get engulfed by the brown of her coffee.
"You should try going into therapy."
For a moment, you almost chewed her head off.
"As a career.", she clarified, almost snorting as she saw your expression. "You interact well with people, and you have a good grasp on the subject." Ah. Say that properly, bitch.
"Here's what I'll do.", she declared, taking a large sip of her coffee - you were almost 90% sure she'd made it Irish earlier - before sliding a small, stapled pile of papers over to you. "I'll give you all the tools you'll need. See if you can get them memorized and come back for a solo quiz later this week. Then, you can begin conducting."
Conducting?
You skimmed your eyes over the stack of paper. Weekly mandatory anger management sessions. Split second, and you thought it was for you, because maybe she had heard you mentally call her a bitch.
"An extremely hardworking and well-scoring student recently got into an altercation on campus, on grounds.", she explained, and you nodded, your eyes not leaving the stack of paper.
'Conducted by' : blank. You supposed that's where you were supposed to sign.
"Although we have a strict policy against harrasment and conflict, none of the three parties involved has openly stated discrimination. The only solid thing the university has got is a confession from the initiator and witnesses from the side of the victim. But given his clean record so far, we have resorted to only this. Sessions to contain any such future outbursts."
Who even was this kid, and why was he your form of extra credit? "But I'd be using him as a lab rat, basically."
"Come again?"
"I'm not qualified or licensed to conduct these sessions, so I don't think--"
She waved you off, the bint. "It's a mere formality, no need to put stock into it. That's not to say you can slack off, half-arse it, either, but he's had no history of violence and is known to be a relatively good-tempered student."
Then why the fuck?
"We figure he can be let off easy - we'd never take sides, so this is off the record, but he was justified - and you can get extra credit, and the victim can be appeased. Quiet and a win-win-win."
The coffee now completely drained, she watched you think it over while staring blankly at the space in which you needed to sign your name. Inhaling deeply, she leaned over, gently prying it from you and flipping the page. "This bit, very important. Sort of like an NDA. No, maybe... an ANS. Agreement Not to Sue. But less official."
"This looks more like summat he should be signing. Basically, since I'm not a licensed therapist, if he doesn't get better, or gets more fucked, the Uni isn't to blame?"
"You need to sign it, too. You'll have to record the sessions, as well."
"So you know I'm not 'half-arsing' it?"
"So we know he's coming to them. But yeah. That too.", she smiled, tilting her head. "You in?"
Well, yeah, you kind of had to be, seeing as she cut marks for your absences out of sheer fucking spite.
You nodded and so did she. "Brilliant! Sign here."
Scrawling your sign - that you came up with in the eighth grade instead of fucking having fun like a kid - on the blank spots her manicured nail hovered over, you bit the inside of your cheek. Was it weird that they weren't telling you who it was?
Was it weird that the sheet had been blank when it was brought to you, meaning whoever this bloke was, he had no clue what was coming?
Uh huh. Yeah.
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"A student?! A first year fucking student? I'm getting a kid-shrink?"
"It's a mere formality. Given your record, we're sure you don't even require these sessions--"
"Professor! Come on! Can't we just say I took them?"
It's quite interesting how chill a philosophy professor can actually be once you get to know them personally. And Walker was cool, as Felix had come to find out in the past couple days of knowing him.
"Afraid not. But I'm sure she's been adequately trained by the psychology in-charge to handle these sessions."
"Why can't the in-charge do it? Would actually do summat!"
"She's busy."
He scoffed as he was handed a stapled stack of papers. "What's this, then?"
"Read it."
He did, for a while, before looking up at him with raised eyebrows. "What is this, a Liability Waiver for if she bollockses my mental health by accident?"
"More or less."
Sweet lord. "Oh, fantastic, so I'm a scapegoat, a trial for this first year, am I? See if counselling is her 'thing'?"
"You know, a more positive attitude towards this, and you might not have to go the whole year.'
"What, sayin' she'll give up?"
Walker looked almost amused, snorting. "No. I'm saying you might actually get a solution for your rage issues."
"I don't have--'
"You could learn a thing or two, Felix. Learn to calm your temper - no matter how non-existent you claim it to be - and learn how to be happier."
"Brilliant. A first year is going to teach me about the joys of non-reactivity, then? Brilliant. We'll see her keep her temper when a girl's being near groped in front of her, hm?"
"We'll need to have you sign there and there and twice on the last page, please."
"She got this before me?", he muttered, glaring at the signatures already present on the pages. "So she got to decide whether she wants to deal with me, not the other way around!? Unbelievable."
"Sign, please, Felix."
He grumbled under his breath, attempting to recall whether he'd ever even heard your name before, as he messily signed something that was probably not his signature, on each page. He has no clue what his signature is. He figured he'd sort it out when he takes over the family estate (or business), or whatever.
"None of these look the same."
"Well, this is hardly official is it? 'S long as my name's there, it's not a problem, yeah?"
"You're gonna give me a migraine before my first week as your student advisor.", he muttered, accepting the sheets back anyway. "Okay, good. Sessions start Saturday."
Fucking spectacular, now this girl was taking his weekends away.
WEEK 1
Your pen twirled between your fingers and the inside of your cheek practically split open with how frequently you'd been resorting to chewing on it lately.
You'd passed the solo quiz that your professor had set up for you, and she'd declared you 'adequately trained' to take these sessions.
Okay? And? What, were you supposed to jump in joy?
Late. This arsehole, 'Felix Catton' was his name. You just... try as you might, you couldn't place a face to the familiar name. And that face was almost ten minutes late.
But one thing you would not do is get up and leave until the hour was up. Work ethic. Wait till the last moment. With any luck, he wouldn't show up at all, and you could complain, and get extra credit some other way--
The door exploded open, and shuffling, throwing-off of a coat and grumbled-settling-down was heard, as you looked up from your notes.
"You're the first year, then?"
Oh, THIS GUY?! Whoa, whoa, whoa, yeah, you remembered him!
You nodded. "Yes. Uh, just a second, Mr. Catton.", you muttered, angling the video camera right, ignoring the scoff it elicited from the junior.
"I'm two years older than you."
"What would you like me to call you?" That plug from the Christmas party who tried to overcharge me?
He watched you fiddling with the device for a bit before sitting up, one leg crossed over another as he huffed, playing with his rings. "Felix is fine."
"Felix it is, then.", you mumbled, finally getting the thing to work, before clearing your throat and sitting up. Here we go. "So, Felix.", you began, trying to smile off the awkwardness. "We're here to just go through these Uni-mandated sessions, so that you may have an insight into conflict resolution and--"
"Do you wanna know why I'm here in this bloody session?"
You glanced over to the camera for a second, feeling like you were in a fucking Office episode, before nodding, gesturing at him to continue. Fuck, if this shite went on the record and he said summat so unbelievably stupid you were at a loss for words, you could kiss your extra credit goodbye.
"I punched a lad. Hard, till his nose bled and he couldn't stand up without support."
You nodded, flicking through the file of information you'd received from some advisor of his, Professor Walker. Nice chap. "Yes, I see that. How does that make you feel? Did it make you feel powerful?"
"Mhm.", he hummed, nodding as he glared at you, a sort of smirk on his face, like he thought this would have you freaking out about his sadistic tendencies. It's funny he thought you cared.
"Happy?'
"Very."
"I see. But one thing that's conveniently missing from your file.", you replied, eyes flicking accusatorily to the camera before reaching his eyes once more. "Is why you did it.", you stated, your fingers intertwining as you looked at him with rapt attention.
This seemed to throw him for a loop, the self-satisfied grin fading for a moment.
"Why'd you want to know, sweetheart? So that you can record me confessing to the crime on tape?", he mused, gesturing at the camera before reclining back in his seat, his arms crossed. "Because I'm sorry to disappoint your wide-eyed, freshman dreams, but I've already said it, on the record."
You frowned, tilting your head softly for a moment. "No, I'm asking, because I truly don't know. They wouldn't give me your identity, let alone your case."
"Well, I hit a lad. For cat-calling a girl."
He observed your face almost twitch for a moment, and he figured you were about to throw the camera at him, but instead, you switched it off. "And they're punishing you for it?", you asked, leaning your forearms in front of him, basically whispering although the camera was off.
Huh. Whoa, maybe you were on his side.
"Yeah, isn't it mental?", he scoffed, leaning in, too. "I figured I should get some sort of medal, y'know? Maybe a commendation from the dean."
"I wouldn't go that far, but it's good, what you did.", you laughed, softly.
"Exactly!", he huffed, a genuine smile now on his face as he leaned back, rubbing his hands over his jaw. "Wow. I- sorry, love, but I didn't expect us to, like, agree."
"No, no, yeah, totally! I thought you were a hotheaded twat. I didn't expect...", you exclaimed, gesturing at him. "Reason."
"Right. Well, okay, great! Uh, phew, yeah?"
You nodded.
"So, yeah, this is cool. We'll just... you'll take care of it, won't ya? Thanks, you're a peach.", he grinned, standing up and not believing his bloody luck!
"Hey, hey, where are you going?"
Turning, he frowned. "Well, we agree. So you'll talk to your in-charge, and say I don't need it, yeah? Oh, oh, you want me to stay the hour so you can, like, log it in. Yeah, yeah, got it.", he mumbled, nodding eagerly.
"What? No." He was, uh... clearly not on the same page as you.
His smile faded slowly. "What?"
"We've got weeks left of this."
"Yeah, but. Wait, I thought you agreed with me."
"I do. It's bonkers to punish you, but, it's mandatory, so."
"'So'? So, go do summat about it, then!", he cried, gesturing at nothing in particular. "Tell 'em there's nothing to work on!"
"I'm not just going to--"
"WHY?!"
You almost flinched. God. Maybe he did have anger issues.
"WHAT'S IN IT FOR YOU?!"
Oh, oh-- uh oh. He didn't even know why you were doing it, and you were sure he'd blow five gaskets if he did.
"Just finish it, stop causing unecessary problems!"
"No, seriously! What's in it for you?"
"SIT DOWN!"
For some reason, that, he listened to.
He slumped down.
"Shut up and do what you were instructed to do." Lord knows where you'd got the balls to talk to a junior like that.
Reaching over to turn the camera back on, you began again. "What would you like me to call you?", you repeated.
"How about I call you something and we can workshop sm'n out for me later?", he grumbled under his breath.
"Sorry? You weren't audible. What was that?"
"Nothing. Felix."
"Felix.", you echoed, nodding. "We're here to just go through these Uni-mandated sessions, so that you may have an insight into conflict resolution and live an overall, controlled and more fulfilling life and have a more fruitful experience here at Oxford.", you read off the script, jaw clenched, mirroring his dirty look.
"Yes, I'm aware, thank you, freshie."
"I'd like it if you adressed me by my name. You already know it from the sign-up form for the sessions, but I am happy to repeat it if you wish.'
"Sign-up form?", he scoffed, looking directly at the camera. "Is that what they're calling it on the record?"
"That is what it is."
"Sweet Lord, it's a Liabil-- hey.", he grimaced, narrowing his eyes at you as you kneed him from under the table.
"Right. Y/N. Am I supposed to call you 'Doctor', too, freshie?"
"Just my name is fine."
He rolled his eyes, his hands fiddling with his rings. "Let's begin with your recount of the incident."
How many bloody times?! He was about to explode.
~~
You ended the session at exactly one hour, because you couldn't take this moron anymore, for fuck's sake.
He didn't object.
Shutting off the camera, you wordlessly packed up your things, stuffing them into your bag.
"Are they payin' ya?"
You snorted, zipping up your bag before slinging it over your shoulder. "No."
"Fuckin' snake."
"How am I a snake, Felix?", you sighed, tapping an impatient foot on the floor.
"Pretending you're on my side and that. Was that just to get information for the therapy part of it? Because that was a bitch move."
"What? No, I genuinely think it's odd that they're punishing you for something like this."
"Then why?! What could they possibly offer a fresher? They wouldn't increase your scholarship for shite this petty, so-- wait. EXTRA CREDIT?!", he gasped, standing up startlingly quick. "You're doin' this for a couple points of extra credit ?! WHAT?!"
"So what if I am?", you asked, schooling your face and your voice to be the picture of calm. "Either way, these sessions are mandated if you don't want this to escalate. It'll be over before you know it."
"EXTRA CREDIT?!", he practically shrieked, as he followed you out the door. "How bloody pathetic! You're going against what you know is right for extra bloody credit?! Just fucking study!"
"It'll be over before you know it, Felix."
"For the rest of the academic year, I have to come to you every Saturday and listen to you blabbering on about how to 'take deep breaths and count to ten'.", he scoffed, incredulously, easily overtaking you and obstructing your path in more ways than one.
"Doesn't always have to be a Saturday."
Oh, he was about to actually get anger issues.
"This pisses you off, too! Come on, admit it, fresher! You don't like this any more than I do!", he declared, crossing his arms defiantly.
You sort of liked pissing him off. Gave you much more to work with, sadistically. Reaching into your bag, you handed him the tiny blue journal you'd bought. "Here."
"What is this?"
"It's for noting down your feelings. You will have to fill at least one page every day and bring it back to me during our sessions."
He gaped incredulously at you as you shouldered past him. You're giving him homework?!
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WEEK 5
"You're not taking off your helmet?"
"No. Bothers you?"
You glanced at the camera for a second, before shaking your head, the corners of your lips turned down in feigned and exaggerated indifference. "No."
"Because I'll keep it on, mud and all. I fell on the way here."
"You fell?"
"Yeah. Helmet's now my coping mechanism. Calms me, y'know?" That made no bloody sense!
"So you're keeping it on."
'You wouldn't deny me my coping mechanism, would you, Y/N?"
You sucked on your teeth, shaking your head once more. Dirt on the desk, dirt on your laptop, dirt-- FUCK!
"No, it's alright."
He grinned slyly, nodding, before sliding the journal over to you. "I filled it."
"Entirely?" It's only Week 5, what the hell?
"Yes, actually. I'm an overachiever."
You raised a brow, taking it from him and placing it next to his file.
"So. How are we doing today?", you asked, once again intertwining your fingers and placing them on the desk as you leaned closer to the imbecile.
"You're not readin' it?"
Oh, please, like you had no clue what was in there. "No, actually, I've got to directly submit this to both your advisor and my in-charge."
"What?"
"Yeah, protocol. That's why I said to take it one week at a time so we can monitor progress, but it seems you're an 'overachiever' - your words, not mine."
"Can I have it back?" His tone was almost nervous, and you were now even more certain what he'd actually bloody written in there.
You almost smirked before you remembered the presence of the camera. "You want it back, Felix?"
"Yeah, I think I, uh, used a couple of profanities."
"That's alright, I'm sure they'll understand."
"Can I please have it back?"
You shrugged, holding it out for him to take, letting him tug on it for a moment before you released it from your grasp. "Would you like another one? Since you've filled this one?"
"I'll buy my own."
"Very well. I ask again, how are you doing today?"
He huffed, momentarily looking like he was actually prepared to answer honestly. "Great."
"Great.", you echoed, your pen twirling between your fingers. "And define 'great' to you."
"Not shite.", he said through gritted teeth.
"In more elaborate, less crude terms, please, Mr. Felix.'
"I am doing well today. Not bad.", he mumbled, playing with the buckle of the helmet he'd so adamantly kept on that was now seeming a bit too bloody tight. But he couldn't take it off. Not when it was clearly bothering you. "Nothing particularly terrible or triggering has occurred."
"And is that always the standard you measure your experiences on? 'Not bad'? If nothing 'terrible or triggering' has happened, it's a 'great' day?", you asked offhandedly, noting it down. 'Not shite'.
His eyes darted up to you. "What?"
"I said, is that always the stand--"
"No, I heard you. Just... isn't that what everyone does?"
"Do you think it is? Do you think it's what everyone does? Have any of your friends told you it is what they do?"
"What do you do?"
"Me?" Were you allowed to answer this? Is that against some therapist rule? You weren't sure, and you couldn't really ask your textbook right now, could you?
He nodded, mildly intrigued.
"Personally, for me to count a day as 'great', there should be an equal balance of absence of bad things and presence of good things."
"Well, then, I fell off my bike, but I did well on a test. Is that, in your books, a 'great' day?"
"Depends. Which do you weigh more? Is falling off a bike worse than getting a bad grade, or is getting a good grade better than staying upright on a bike?"
"Getting a good grade."
"Well, then, I suppose, there's your answer."
Huh. This was an odd perspective he's never exactly... heard before. Wait, no! This shite is not working, fuck off, fresher!
"Whatever."
"Whatever indeed.", you nodded. "You seem to have a better attitude this week, to the session." He did not. But it would piss him off if he thought that you thought this was working.
"I do not."
"Oh, well, then, pardon me, my mistake. So, tell me. Why do you think it is, that you're not particularly interested in these sessions?"
"Because I don't have anger issues. If a bloke catcalls a girl once, it's whatever - still bad - but whatever. Happens. But if he keeps doin' it, almost roofies her at a party and constantly tailing her, and then tryin' to score in a fucking library, just because she can't yell out at him, that's, like... creep behaviour!"
You nodded. "Yes, you mentioned this, in the first session, and also to your student advisor, it seems.", you replied, tapping the tip of your pen at the bit of the file that mirrored what he was saying.
"And you think that that's a therapy-worthy answer."
"Why do you not think you're going to get anything out of these sessions, Felix? Even without anger issues, per se, everyone could use some guidance in controlling their emotions and resolving conflict peacefully, wouldn't you agree?"
"No, I would not agree. I think that if you're being an absolute prick , then no amount of peaceful talking is going to do anything. You need to get physical. Teach a lesson."
"I see. And you know this works because...?"
"Because he's shut up, hasn't he?"
"Right, but maybe he's still doing it. Perhaps not to that particular girl, but how do you know for sure you've 'taught him a lesson'?"
"Because- well.", he muttered. Shut up, fresher! "He's not that daft! He wouldn't risk another beating!"
"If he's daft enough to do it three times even after she expressed disinterest, Felix, I'm sure he might be 'daft' enough to 'risk another beating'."
He tsked, taking off the bloody tight fucking helmet, and running his hands through his hair. You watched the brown spill through the gaps of his fingers, before your eyes came back to his face. "You're frustrated?"
"Yes, I'm frustrated."
"What do you usually do, when you're frustrated?"
"Certainly not sit in a room with a fresher and 'talk about it'!"
"Right, I suppose you don't.", you replied, smiling. "So what is it you do?"
"I dunno, smoke?"
"Smoke?", you asked, tilting your head, noting it down. "You smoke?"
"Yeah, I smoke. What, you going to turn this into a cancer-awareness session?"
"I'm simply trying to understand you, Felix."
"What is this, like a first date, you learn shite about me, and see if I'm worth anything in your eyes?", he scoffed.
"Would that make it easier to open up?"
"No! God! What high school did you go to? Idiot."
"Oh, so we are going with the first date thing?"
"No- I- you're so stupid! I don't actually care what high school you went to! It was rhetoric!"
His outburst, oddly, was not followed by a calm and infuriating retort, in fact, you just looked back at him, disappointed, it looked like. But that was impossible, because that would mean you gave a crap, which, you couldn't. You did this for extra credit like a fuckin' try-hard, right?
The silence almost devours him whole as he looks into your eyes - why were they so... he didn't even know, that look you were giving him just... freaked him out.
"Time's up. You can leave."
What?! No, no, no, he just got here.
"Already?"
He heard the video camera shut off. "Time flies when you're actually working with me, Felix, y'know?"
"Don't get used to it, I had a shit day.'
You chuckled softly, nodding. "I won't. Have a nice rest o' your weekend, Catton."
WEEK 10
"Hello again, Felix."
"Hi."
"You seem cheery today."
"Yes, actually. I went out last night. Downed a couple pints with the lads. It was fun."
"I'm glad you had fun."
He nodded, pursing his lips as he rocked back and forth, awkwardly.
"Yes, so. If you don't mind, I'd just like to go back to some things that were left unfinished in some of the previous sessions. Let's circle back to your mention of what you do when you're frustrated. Smoke. Anything else?"
He sighed, rubbing his temple as he looked up at you. 'No. Well, if you're talking about last night, uh, drink, yeah, sometimes, but never to change my mood or whatever."
"I see. So that's all you do, when frustrated?"
"Yeah. Smoke."
"How about this. Next time you feel frustrated, instead of picking up a pack of cigarettes, pick up a pen."
"What, write down my feelings like a thirteen year old girl?"
"No, draw. On paper, on a desk, on your hand, who cares? Draw."
"Draw?"
"Yeah. It's worked for me, and you seem to be responding slightly better when I give you real life examples of what's worked and not worked for me, so."
"What, the bike thing from Session 5?! Because I-- Oh, please, you're not that bloody smart! Anyone could've said that, doesn't mean I'm 'responding better' just because you said it worked for you, you're a fuckin' fresher, everything you read in your stupid little psych textbooks would work for you!", he snapped. He didn't even know what half of that meant. He just wanted to say something.
"See, it seems that this is more what you do when you're frustrated, Felix, per my observation. You're free to correct me if I'm wrong, but since our previous sessions, this sort of insulting defensiveness is what I feel you resort to."
"'M not defensive. I just think this is pointless."
"Yes, you've made that quite apparent."
"Well, then how about you just declare me fixed?"
"It's not about declaring you, alright, it's about finishing the minimum duration provided to us by the University."
"Fine."
Silence. "So. I ask again. Why not draw?"
"Fine, I'll draw."
"Alright. Thank you, Felix. Time's up."
"What?!"
"Just kidding. You've only been here five minutes. How about... and humour me here...", you muttered, reaching under the desk and groping around until you pull out two sketchbooks. "We draw right now?"
"What, and then you analyse how fucked I am in the head?"
"Or we just draw. We don't even have to talk.", you replied, handing him the sketchbook. God, this better work. You'd had to draw info from child psych books for this guy.
~~
It took barely five minutes for him to begin talking again.
"What are these pencils?"
"Don't ask me, they're all Oxford-provided."
"What a joke. You know, when I was a fresher, I didn't even let myself think of borrowing anything from Uni, I got all my own shite, and even if I lost it, I'd ask it to be sent over from home."
"Really?" Fucking rich boy cunt.
"Mhm.", he hummed, the scratches of his incessant scribbling almost grating in the silent room, but also comfortable, somehow, blending in with the smooth swish sounds of your own, lazy strokes. "Only the best. Can't afford mistakes, can I?"
Can't afford? You'd researched him enough to know that little existed of the sort for him.
"I suppose you can't."
"Y'know, I fucking lost my shite third week of freshman year. How about you?"
"I'm handling it okay, thanks for asking." You were, in fact, not. Your assignments were all overdue by now, and you were having to pull all-nighters that bled steadily into mornings because of this new extra-credit task you'd taken on, and to top it all off, none of the other Professors seemed to care that the Uni was milking the two of you. Abusing your need to improve your grade - although you shouldn't fucking need it -and subjecting him to these sessions with none of his own volition.
"That's good to hear. How close are you to offing yourself, then?", he mused, raising a brow and licking the back of his molars as his eyes slowly reached yours. Fuck. He was onto you.
You tsked, reaching over and shutting off the camera. "You know I have better things to do than edit this to cut out your little quips, right? I really can't have you talking about offin' yourself."
"Oh, so you're also a drown-in-alcohol kind of person, I see."
What in the everloving fuck-- "God, get a fuckin' life, mate.", you muttered, reaching back up to switch the camera on after silently glaring and counting down from three.
"I'm handling it okay, thanks for asking.", you repeated.
"Huh. Really?"
"Yes. Why, is your school year not going okay?"
"No, it's going spectacular. My parents pay for an afternoon to go off once a week for a useless fresher to tell their son to meditate."
You chose not to respond to that, instead pursing your lips and continuing to draw. A flower, it seemed, your hands wished to create.
"Why do you even need extra credit?"
"I was sick, and I missed a couple classes."
"Oh, and you flunked the tests?", he asked, reaching over to grab your pencil out of your hands and use the eraser on the back of it, before tossing it back to you. Prick, and if that smirk was any indication, smug prick.
"No, actually, I'd already finished a good chunk of the syllabus content my first couple weeks so I did fine in my tests."
"So why?"
He looked genuinely curious. So genuinely curious, that you actually felt like this was a first date and he was an annoyingly inquisitive romantic candidate.
"She just didn't like the absences." Plus, everyone else just took Psych to slack off.
"That's not fair."
"Yeah, well, you beat up a creep for a girl and they're punishing you, so."
His eyes flicked over to the camera momentarily. "That's on the record."
"It should be."
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Normalcy is hard to achieve because it's never truly been attained.
Now, this kind of knowledge is only acquired when you take a philosophy class - like you - but since Felix was a PolSci-stuck-up-arsehole, it really didn't strike him that the life he'd lived before you had neither been normal nor happy.
Which is why when he found you and a couple of your friends hanging out by the lawn of a frat party, passing around a spliff, he just couldn't resist.
"Is this your coping mechanism, then?"
He reveled in the groan you replied with.
"Ladies, if you could excuse us?"
You rolled your eyes as all your mates nodded slyly before scrambling up. With hungry and suggestive looks at him and then you, they waved subtly. Spectacular. They already thought you were hooking up and now... fuck.
"Ah. I think we're gonna need that, if you will.", he called, winking as he grabbed the spliff from one of them, before settling down next to you. "See? I'm a celebrity. You should bring that up next time, see if you can't do anything with it."
"What?"
"Like, ask me about that. Incorporate it. 'How's it feel, Felix, being the life of the party, and the apple of everyone's eye?'"
"Incorp-- do you think this is a game? Like this is a play?!"
"Well, yeah. It's basicall--"
"GOD, you absolute prick! I'm here freakin' out about the syllabus, tests, and stayin' up to analyse and collate your bullshit and I have to submit it and study resources for it and--", you paused, catching your breath and glaring at him before taking a hit to calm your nerves. "And you think it's a story, like an improv session, where we add off each other.", you mumbled the last bit out.
"What are you, burnt-out from this shite?"
You didn't respond and he watched the smoke flow above the two of you. "God. You are. What sort of a freshman's burnt out by second term?"
"The kind that has to be a shrink to some anger-issued arsehole."
"Hey, c'mon, you-", he huffed, tilting his head at you. "You don't have to put too much effort into this, it's a formality."
"To you!", you yelled, sitting up in frustration, your elbow on your knee and your blunt in your fingers.
He sat up, too, sighing. "I'm sorry. For what it's worth."
"Worth nothing."
"Yeah, I can tell.", he muttered, hiding a scoff. "Gimme."
You rolled your eyes, but handed him the spliff nevertheless, which he grumbled as he took a drag of. Knees elevated to his chest, he exhaled the smoke. "This is good. Is it American?'
"How should I know?"
"You don't care what sort of weed you smoke? This actually is one of your coping methods?"
"For the love of-- lay off, man!"
"Whoa, whoa, it's a joke!"
"You're a joke!"
He almost laughed at that. Almost, because he'd had quite fucking enough of you. He didn't forget who he was just because you might have changed his perspective a little. He was still Felix motherfucking Catton, a motherfucking Upperclassman. And when he was a fresher, he had to treat his Upperclassmen with utmost respect- no, reverence - so he'll be damned if he's gonna let you sit here and call him a joke.
"Stand up."
"What?"
"Stand up."
"Why?"
"NOW, FRESHER, NOW!" Okay, the startle in your body language made him feel the tiniest bit bad, but still, it was exactly what had been done to him, and he wasn't all whiny about it.
"Okay, okay, I'm up, I'm up!", you mumbled, straightening out your shirt. "What?"
He had no clue what he wanted you to stand up for.
"So. The reason I had you shoot up..."
Think, Felix! Think!
"...Is actually quite simple, really. I'm sure you've already guessed."
"You want to get my mind off it or summat."
Sure. "Good. You're smart. And how will I be doing that?"
You shrugged. "Take me on a joyride on your stupid bicycle or summat.", you grumbled.
Sure. Let's go with that. Better than Felix's idea of making you do jumping jacks, like his seniors had done to him.
"Wow, maybe shrinks really can read minds. And at least you have one of your own.", he replied, flicking your forehead as he shepherded you over to the exit of the party. Yeah, he didn't think through how far you'd have to walk before you actually reached his bike. Oh, well. Better for him.
"So.", he began, arms swinging exaggeratedly at his side. "Have you heard anything from your in-charge yet? Walker won't tell me anything."
You shook your head. "It's all the same. 'Received tapes. Good work. Keep going.' Like I'm bloody angling for a gold star."
"Well, you're angling for the college equivalent of a gold star, which is a smidge of extra credit."
Shrugging, you seemed to agree. It was a pleasant sort of... stoned sort of quiet for the rest of the walk until his bike came into view. "There it is."
"That's the bike you fell off of after you aced your test?"
"Yeah."
"How?", you scoffed, buckling up the little helmet he offered you "Thing looks brand new."
"What, you were expecting some post-war, ancient bike?", he snorted, clambering onto the seat.
"Yeah, I thought it'd be some rusty, squeaky, rickety thing. How's this supposed to work? Where do I sit?"
"On your own bike's seat.", he replied, gesturing to the rest of the bicycle lot.
"I don't have a bloody bicycle! I'm normal! I walk to classes!"
"How close is your dorm?!"
"Quite."
"Well...", he huffed, taking off his helmet. 'Well, okay, so, just... take one."
"Take one?"
"Like... a random one. Borrow an unlocked one."
"Steal, you mean."
"Semantics."
"I'm not stealing."
He groaned. He had way too much of a heart to punish you like his seniors did.
═════════════════════════ ⋆⋅💙⋅⋆ ═══════════════════════
"Could you slow down?!"
He watched you grumble before you slowed down, allowing him to jog up next to you. "I'm going to hold onto the handlebar because I wouldn't put it past you to steal my bike and then ask me 'how did that make you feel?' in the next session."
You actually had to stop the bike to laugh for that one.
"Oh, she acts human.", he remarked, crossing his arms across his chest as he regarded you. "Alright, it's not... that funny."
But you just didn't stop laughing.
Well, until you started crying.
Maybe that weed was laced. Yeah, he was feelin' a bit off, himself. Shit.
"I mean, fuck, Felix, mate, you- you know I don't think you should be antagonized like this, yeah? You're... you, you're good, you- you helped a girl, and your anger issues are good!"
Okay, clearly the laced weed was hitting you both at the same time, somehow. Either it was causing him to mishear some sympathy from your end or causing you to express sympathy. Either way, somehow, you were both oddly on the same page.
"I don't have anger-bloody-issues.", he gritted out, tapping his fingers impatiently on the handlebar.
"No, mate, you do, but, like, they're good, you don't have to get all touchy about it. I like it, personally. Think it's good. You're stickin' it to the man and all that."
He scoffed as he shifted closer, flicking your - well, his - helmet back a bit. "You're on thin ice, 'mate'! I told you, I don't have anger iss--"
"You're yellin' at me right now!"
"I'm NOT--", he cut himself off, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "You're pissin' me off."
"Everything pisses you off! That's why they're called anger issues!', you retorted, and he swore he was close to pushing you off the bike and seeing how many minutes of meditation you'd employ not to uppercut him.
"I don't need your shrink bullshit, and you can't do it anyway! I don't get how you're burnt out, y'know? You half-arse everything!"
He barely knew you outside of these sessions. He was straight up lying, but he wanted to prove that it wasn't that easy to keep your calm when provoked. Especially not by some smart aleck swot-freshman who thinks her psych major means she can read his mind and give him lip.
Ow ow, ow. Fuck. He needed to sit. down. The 'weed' was definitely about to make him pop a blood vessel, because did he just see three stars in the sky run down in front of him? No. Can't be, yeah?
"D'you think...?", you groaned, hastily removing the helmet. "D'you think there was summat in the punch?"
"Think it was the weed."
"Weed doesn't-- oh."
He nodded, gently steering the bicycle to the nearest bench, which was barely a hundred paces away, observing your feet elevated and the pedals rotating on their own as he tugged it along.
Grunting lowly as he sat, he held out a hand for you after you leant the bicycle against a nearby streetlamp. You slumped down next to him. "This is why I don't take Donna's weed, but she swore it was clean."
"Some friend she is."
"Hey."
"Oh, please, come on. She lies to you, gives you laced weed because, what, she thought she knew best on what would calm you down? That's not what a friend does."
"What does a friend do? Take you on bicycle rides across campus?"
"I mean, sure. Why not?", he asked, gesturing around. "It's fresh air, yeah? We had some talkin' happening, as well, sorted out our differences and that, yeah?"
You chuckled, softly, shaking (and lightly clutching) your head. "And what did we sort out?"
"That you're a bit of a cunt. And I'm a twat."
"Second one is accurate."
"That statement just proved the first one.", he retorted, before scoffing and breaking into a fit of breathy giggles. "Fuck."
You watched the world spin for a while, a dizzying amalgamation of shapes and stars and colours and suddenly you were aware of the clothes on your body, the wind in your hair, the saliva on your tongue, the beat of your heart.
And that's when you did it. You weren't sure what you expected or why you did it, but you just ended up kissing him like it was summat you were meant to do next, like a script. Like clockwork.
He, to say the least, was surpised it was you who initiated it. Honestly. He'd always been a very daft person when it came to... well, boundaries, for one. Sane actions, for the other. However, there was something less daft and more... crazed about this drug-induced haze you were clouded in that rendered his self-awareness moot.
And so he kissed back.
Ravenously.
This, it seemed, according to the faux marijuana, was all he ever fucking needed. Poof, no anger issues. And for you? Poof, no stress.
It was wrong, to say the least. Not due to anything besides the fact that there was no logical person who'd put you two together. He groaned softly, almost reverently, as he gripped a couple locks of your hair, a wordless direction for you to get your idiotic arse over here. And you did. The kiss didn't break. You guys should get an award for that impressive feat.
But the real award should be for your desperate, bruising grip to sobriety, the one that eventually led to you pulling yourself away from his lips, breathlessly.
"I know what you're doing."
He wasn't one for biting his lip, so he bit down on yours, instead. "Yeah? What's that, babe?", he asked, fiddling with the button of your jeans.
"You're tryin' to get off the hook of these sessions by claiming conflict of interest 'cause of this."
Oh, fuck, he hadn't even thought of that. Would've been so fuckin' smart, and plus, he'd have got a lay out of it. But he didn't exactly feel like giving a premature end to these sessions that he'd - never fucking admit - grown sort of fond of.
"Or maybe, I'm trying to get off, period.", he whispered, kissing at your cheek.
"Yeah, right."
"Trust issues much?", he murmured, his hand gently sliding into the front of your jeans. "Maybe next session, we should work on that, sweetheart."
Fuck.
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No one ever tells you this - lest you experience some form of joy in life - but waking up to good smells rather than any form of sound is heaps better, calmer, lovelier.
And you woke up, not to the sound of your alarm, but to the smell of goddamn butter and toast. Like, fuck, okay. Damn. This is what life should feel like, then?
You groaned, almost ready to scream at how at peace you were, before getting out of bed, rubbing your face. You shot right back in, though. Right. You were starkers.
"Felix?!"
God, you hoped it was actually him and you hadn't had some sort of adventure after him last night.
He practically left skid marks, the way he rushed to the bedroom doorway. "Uh huh?"
"Where the fuck are my clothes?"
"Oh, I put them in the wash."
"Felix--"
"Just kidding. They're in that drawer, there." Across the room.
"Could you get them for me?"
He smirked. 'Yeah."
"'Yeah' as in you will, or 'yeah' as in you could, but you won't?"
His smirk dissolved into an almost fond simper. "You know me so well."
"I'm not walkin' out naked."
"See, what is it with you girls, gosh! As if I didn't see everything last night, now you're suddenly all coy?", he teased, yanking the drawer open and tossing you your clothes, rolling his eyes before turning around so you could change. "Last night count as a breach of, uh, what is it...?"
"Not breach. But Conflict of Interest. Yeah. So, I'm guessing you're free, now. No more sessions."
"Mm. Shame, that. I had some really interesting things written in there.", he replied, pointing to a blue notebook on the bedside table.
"Like what?"
"Like... me realising I'm falling in love with you.", he whispered, softly, hand on his heart. He paused long enough for you to begin to question whether this was dedication to his joke or an actual, sincere fuckin' confession.
"Fuck! Wow! Gullible much? I'm joking, obviously! What, you think I'd have some, like, ten lines written every day, like 'Oh, my love, oh, my love, XOXO, Felix!', or summat?"
"Well, I don't bloody know! Your'e scarily good at the poker face, y'know?"
"Why, thank you, thank you very much.", he preened, tipping an invisible hat in your direction.
"Makin' French Toast. You vegetarian? Or vegan? Nah, I don't care, you're eatin' this."
Groaning, you got up, took his offer of an unused toothbrush, and let him escort you to the bathroom. "These rich-kid-dorm-suites, I swear--"
"Jealous much?"
"I swear to fucking god, you better stop saying 'much' after everything and thinkin' it's funny!"
"Anger issues much?"
"Arsehole much?!"
He giggled, waving at you before scrambling over to the kitchen to make sure his French toast was stil intact. Not before he grabbed your imaginary 'flipping-off' from the air and brought it to his heart, as if you'd blown him a kiss, instead.
Fucking hell. You had to now spend a. money, on Ibuprofen, b. time on coming up with an explanation as to how this happened and why you still deserve that extra credit, and c. energy on having to deal with this Felix Catton guy who you'd apparently come to be relatively fond of.
Spitting out your paste and gargling the remnants out, you walked out of the bedroom to the kitchen, where Felix had laid out the toast on crappy paper plates. "Left over from a party, figured I'd use 'em."
"Thanks.", you nodded, sitting down and biting a bit off one. "It's good."
"Thanks.", he parroted, dropping the last onto his plate before turning off the stove and sitting opposite you. "So, it just violates it all? Just 'cause we shagged, you can't 'fix me' anymore?", he asked, gulping down a sip of orange juice.
"Yeah, summat like that. I might, like, be more inclined to let you off the hook or whatever."
"Mm. What about your extra credit, then? Why don't you just act like this never happened?"
"Couldn't. In good conscience."
"But then you'll be extremely stressed. Might go back to Donna and her laced weed.", he pointed out, taking a bite. "Over the summer, you'll have to catch up on your missing assignments, yeah?"
"Yeah. Fuck. Oh, yeah, I do.", you whined, your forehead on the heel of your palm.
"Come to Saltburn, then."
"What?" What was he talking about?
"My family estate. Come to Saltburn. It's a change of scenery, and it works wonders, I swear. You'll finish everything by first week of summer vacation, and the next month or so, it's all just you-time."
"Why would I come to Saltburn?"
"I just told you."
You sighed. Logically, yes, it did make sense for a change of view. But. You didn't exactly want to get dragged into whatever a normal day for Felix Catton (and Farleigh Start - his cousin, apparently!) looked like.
"It's full of old shite, though, like, ancient stuff. Cobwebs, dusty, grimy, stuffy-- hey! Stuffy and boring. You'll fit right in.", he grinned cheekily, winking as he continued to chew.
Well, fuck.
"Suspicious much?"
'Much'. You were going to strangle this guy in his own mansion, you're sure.
"Seriously, think about it, just us, ice-cream, the sea, summer. Who knows, you could go in a loser and come out with a boyfriend. Moi."
"Oh, please.", you snickered, and he followed suit.
"I just might tell you what's in that diary. XOXO, Felix, yeah, but what'd I write before it? A confession of my love? A death threat? A riddle? Poetry? Secrets?", he mused, waggling his fingers as if to spook you. "Ooh."
You scoffed, shaking your head in amusement as you took a sip of the orange juice.
"Come on. Come to Saltburn. Worth your while, I promise."
Well, fuck.
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Pervert Armin x black reader
MDNI & AGELESS BLOGS
Warnings: uhh EXTREME horniness and no self respect?
A/N: Y’all.. I barley proofread my shit so in sorry if there’s 500 typos and I just came outta writers retirement so I ask that y’all cut me some SLACK😭I’m done yapping now
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Armin knew he was going to be obsessed with you since the day you walked into the classroom. With your pretty brown gloss-covered lips and braids hanging hanging down to your ass. Your vanilla scent made all of the blood rush to his head…and dick. He had to have you all to himself. He wanted to take you back to him dorm and keep you there as his little pet. No one else would be able to see you on your knees like a puppy, tongue hanging out of your mouth and waiting for his next command. Maybe he’d tie you to his bed and stuff his shirt in your mouth so the whole residence hall won’t hear your screams (not that he’d care) . He was interrupted by his pervert thoughts when you approached him. “You Armin? I think were partners” of course y’all were partners. Armin made sure of that by rigging the professor’s spreadsheet. No, he simply refused to work with someone other than his pretty future wife. He talking bout some “Yeah! Let’s work at my dorm” knowing damn well y’all won’t be doing shit. He won’t make his princess do any work, he can bullshit this easy ass project as long as he can buy his face in your pussy for hours.
After 3 project sessions he had you wrapped around his finger….Literally. His two long slender fingers curled up into your pussy and tongue lapping up your brown-pinkish folds simultaneously.“Armin slow down please….I can’t” Amin simply ignored your ass, even flicking his tongue and a faster rate your sucking your clit until it was attached to his mouth. “just need to make you mine….wanna make my girl feel good” Your back arched off the bed as yours thighs shook around Armin’s head. Just when you were sure that you was finna squirt all over his, Armin stopped and flipped you over. “Want you to cum with my dick” This was the main event that Armin had fantasized. He opened up the little draw next to his bed and grabbed a baby blue ribbon to tie your hands behind your back with, and some vanilla coconut oil, your signature scent. That boy could not wait to oil up that ass, all for him. He slowly rubbed his hands all over your smooth brown skin, down to the back of your thighs. Armin squirts some oil of his hand, stroking his already hard dick. Without warning he slides into your pussy, almost nutting immediately after feeling your warmness. The small dorm was filled with sounds of your muffled moans and slapping sounds from Armin’s thighs against yours. “S’ the only dick you’ll ever need” He sneers through his teeth as his pace quickens and his grip on your hips create indents in your skin. Armin watched your arms struggle against the ribbon restraints and he took this opportunity to grab your arms and hold them behind your back while he fucked into your pussy.
Your breathing was becoming ragged and your walls began to spasm and clench around his dick. “Min im about to cum..ughh shit” He suddenly slows down his pace, making you whimper from the lack of speed. He grabs you by the throat, giving it a light squeeze. “Say you love me first…tell me your gonna be a good bitch for me” Your eyes are rolling into the back of your head and your mouth is hanging open, and that brain is struggling to put one word together. “Say it or you get nothing” he slowly starts fucking into you faster, hand still wrapped around your throat, trying to make you break “Love you min..m’ur bitch” Your whole body begins to shake as you cream all over his dick . When you’re done he pulled out made sure to cum all over your face, globs of white sticking to your cheeks, nose, and forehead. “my good girl, baby” he says as his fingers stroked your cum covered face. After y’all get all cleaned up, he gently placed you in his bed where you knocked out as soon as your head hit the pillow. Armin couldn’t help but to admire your unconscious body, sleeping peacefully on his side of the bed. Yeah, you ain’t ever leaving his room.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
#aot smut#armin x black reader#armin smut#armin arlet smut#armin arlet x reader#attack on titan smut#armin x reader#aot x reader#aot x black y/n#aot x black reader#attack on titan x black reader#attack on titan x female reader#eren x black reader#eren smut#levi x black reader#levi smut
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☆ LMK headcannons before I go to sleep ☆

Ao Lie has a BIG smile because of him being a horse. He also has super sharp teeth because he's a dragon as well. This results in a HUGE smiled with razor sharp teeth that most people don't like.
Mei has a smaller smile with duller teeth because of how far down the generational line she is. She also has smaller horns and very few scales.
Tang is SUPER competitive in games. Like HARD core competitive.
Macaque has SERIOUS resting bitch face. He looks made all the time besides when he's with Wukong or the monkies.
Mk didn't know what kind of relationship Wukong and the monkeys had so when the little ones called him "Dad" and "Grandpa" instead of "King", it confused the hell out of him.
Mk also didn't know that Redson was Wukong uncle till Wukong casually dropped it in a training session.
Wukong is Redsons godfather.
Macaque hates having long hair because it makes him too hot for his liking. Hell cut it if it gets past the bottom of his neck.
Sandy has a fluffy orange cat and named him "Wukong". He has also done this with Mk, Mei, Tang, Pigsy, and recently, Redson.
Redson loves ice cream but he has to eat it super quick or it will melt.
Wukong is SEVERELY claustrophobic for obvious reasons. DBK is also claustrophobic, but to a lighter sense.
Macaque uses corny jokes and flirts on Wukong and somehow Wukong finds it charming.
In the battlefield Wukong is elegant and precise, in his normal life he slams his hip into ever corner possible.
Chang'e is NOT a lightweight. She could drink for hours and only be buzzed.
Wukong hides under Chang'es counter so that way he can still be on the show but not be on camera. He likes to luck bowls she's not using anymore or hand her ingredients. He's her "special tester" to make sure the foods good. If you look closely enough you can see his hand popping up.
Wukong likes to compare hand sizes alot because of how diffrent all his friends are. Most of the time his friends hands swallow him because obviously he's alot smaller, but Macaque's and Mk's hands aren't much bigger than his.
Mei would dox you if she felt like you deserve it.
Wukong found the camera Mei placed on him and got rid of it immediately. Redson copied this.
Both Wukong and Redson have curly hair but they straighten it.
Pigsy is the smallest in his family. His mom, dad, grandma, Tang, and Mk are all bigger than him.
Tang has a older sister. He also has a few cousins. His family is LOADED.
Tangs mom was disapproving of Pigsy. Tangs dad LOVES him and Mk. Opposite on Pigsys side. His dad HATES tang but his mom loves him.
Sandy is a active reader and has many favorite books. He likes to talk to Wukong or Tang about them.
Mk has to have braces until he was about 20.
Mei international dyed her hair to make her parents mad but she atcually ended up liking it so she kept it.
Pigsy is Mks favorite parent. He is not shy about this fact and will say it when asked.
Redson is very blunt. He's not always trying to hurt your feelings, sometimes it's just hit tone making him sound meaner than what he's trying to convey.
Sandy is still looking for Hunstman.
Wukong does nit care what gender is. He doenst care if you think he's a boy, girl, or anything else. As far as he's concerned he's just a monkey and that's all that matters.
Wukong is extremely warm so the monkeys (and Macaque when Wukong kets him in his bed) snuggles up to him and grabs him so they can feel the warmth.
Mayor bits ice cream. He also bites jawbreakers.
Azure eats like he just got out of prison. Wukong is a slower eater and makes fun of him for his quick pace.
Yellow Tusk needs glasses but he won't wear them.
Peng is the kinda gut where THEY can make a joke insulting their friends but will get PISSED if you try and do it too.
Nezha has a HORRENDOUS sleep squedule that he picked up from both his job and Wukong.
Pif snaps more than she'd like. Things make her frustrated quickly and she snaps because of it. She's yelled at Redson more than she'd like to because of it. Redaon never knows what to expect feom her so he's very careful not to make her angry. DBK isn't much better.
Macaque makes jokes about Wukongs weight and him getting bigger but he doenst like it when he can hear Wukong critize his body. He likes how soft Wukong is.
Wukong has always been chubby exept when he was on the journey and starving. That kinda skinny wasn't okay.
Wukong likes to mess up Tangs hair cause he finds it funny that Tang looks exactly like his master just with hair. Tang let's him do it cause he know it makes him feel better.
Nezha crashes at Wukong's place when he's tired of work. Wukong offers him a room but he normally falls asleep to quickly on the couch.
I'm so sleepy yall but at least I got motzeralla sticks today.
These are always so fun to make.
#lmk#lmk sun wukong#lmk macaque#lmk shadowpeach#lmk mk#lmk mei#lmk redson#lmk chang'e#lmk dbk#lmk pif#lmk pigsy#lmk tang#lmk freenoodles#lmk sandy#lmk azure lion#lmk peng#lmk yellow tusk elephant#lmk ao lie#lmk nezha
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Filthy Desires - Harper x Reader
TW: Obsessive behavior, doctor/patient relationship, past dubious consent, abusive power dynamics, mentions of hypnosis, male Harper
NSFW! MDNI
Reader is gender neutral + AFAB
You don't know how long you had been here, and you were sure Harper and the rest of the nurses purposefully kept that information from you. Longer than a month, surely. Long enough for the other patients to call you "Harper's bitch", that was for sure.
As offended as you were by the crude nickname they had given you, it was still undeniably true. Harper controlled almost every aspect of your life. Sure, he essentially controlled all the patients' lives as long as they were in his ward, but you were a different case. You got a certain kind of privilege (that's what Harper called it, at least) not afforded to any patient. Your room was always the closest to his office, meaning he could just "stop in and check in on" you any time of any day.
Sometimes, it was a simple chat. He'd ask you how you were, give you a quick peck on the lips, and leave.
Other times, it was more serious sessions. Sessions that went on for far too long and made you extremely exhausted for days afterwards. He hypnotized you into being complacent, dumb, and forgetful, but you knew fully well what he had been doing to you. There were moments he didn't even bother going through hypnosis first. Those times he was obviously more pent up and frustrated, which used to be rare, but now it seemed like he got like that at least once a week.
Occasionally you enjoyed his attention and praise, but the toll it took on you to please him had gotten so mentally taxing that there were days you considered trying to break out or notify the outside world. Unfortunately for you, Harper never let patients use outside technology like cellphones.
As humiliating and invasive as the daily routine was for you, he also showered you with attention you never got outside of the hospital.
"Time for your session," a nurse calmly notified you.
You nodded and walked your normal route to Harper's office. You've memorized the way after having to go there so many times each and every day. Harper sat behind his large oak desk, reading a file on another patient.
"Y/N," Harper greeted. His piercing pink eyes peeked out over the rim of his glasses. He had his straight blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail to keep it from falling into his face while he's working. He raised his hand in the air and made a gesture for the nurse to leave. Once the nurse shut the door behind him, Harper spoke again. "Come sit."
Obedient as ever, you quickly sat yourself on Harper's lap. It had became your usual spot at this point.
Harper peppered gentle, loving kisses along your cheek, jaw, neck, and lips. It was hard to understand anything about the doctor, but one thing he made obvious was he loved kissing you.
When he pulled back, he ran his hand through your hair affectionately. His hand traveled down your torso, rubbing and touching at whatever pleased him. He pressed sloppy wet kisses over your neck and ground his knee against your clothed cunt. You keened and leaned into him, grinding down on his leg in hopes of stimulation. He chuckled darkly, always amused with how needy and desperate you got so quickly.
"Do you know what today is?" he asked in between pecks along your collarbone.
You shook your head.
Harper trailed his finger lightly along your side. "It's your birthday."
For just a split second, you felt happy. But then you put together how long that meant you had been here. Your face fell. Harper hummed, noticing your shift in attitude. His warm, broad hands skimmed over your stomach.
"We've been doing such good work recently, haven't we?" he said, ignoring your sudden dejectedness. Harper was good at shifting topics subtly. You hummed quietly in affirmation. "Then tonight," Harper tilted your jaw so you'd make eye contact with him. "I can give you a special treat for your birthday." He kissed your nose.
"Okay, Doctor Harper," you whispered, leaning into his hold. His strong hands pressed into your sides, encouraging you to keep grinding against his leg. You weren't getting any real stimulation that way, but he loved hearing your whimpers and moans regardless.
You gripped onto the doctor's broad shoulders and arched your back, rolling your hips. Harper watched you with an intent expression on his face.
"What do you want for your special treat, darling?"
"Uh..." Your breathing was getting heavy and he could tell how frustrated you were getting not being able to come from humping his leg. Harper let a hand trail along your torso, stopping to rub your labia through the standard hospital attire you were expected to wear. Your hips shuddered at the indirect touch and a squeaky moan escaped your lips.
"Be descriptive. I can't give it to you if I don't know what you want." Harper rubbed your core faster, encouraged by the high pitched noises and half-formed words coming out of you.
"I-I don't know," you shakily admitted. You just wanted to cum, it didn't matter how at this point.
Harper raised his eyebrows in amusement. "Then would you like to figure it out on my desk?" He didn't even wait for an answer, next thing you knew, he had hoisted you up with a shocking amount of strength. He sat you on the cold wood and made a place for himself by parting your legs open. "So cute, you're soaking already," Harper muttered to himself. He rubbed the dampened fabric between your legs, cooing when you jerked and let out a satisfied gasp.
"Doctor," you whined.
Just as Harper planned on removing your underwear, there was a knock on the door. His usual composed expression was gone, only for a second. He stood up straight to smooth down his hair and fix his tie. "Under the desk."
His tone was soft but stern. You crawled under, sitting on the floor comfortably in between Harper's legs. Harper seated himself in his comfortable, office chair and pulled it in so you would have just enough room.
"Come in," he answered, already back to his professional voice. You sat in the dark beneath the desk and listened to the nurse come in, talking about something related to the medication being stocked low again.
They began exchanging words back and forth, but your mind wasn't on that. It was rather on the obvious sight of his cock straining in his pants right in front of your face. You looked up for any acknowledgement from Harper, but his attention was focused on the nurse.
Without any sense of urgency, your hands slowly trailed up his legs. Harper didn't bat an eye. You played with the buckle, undoing and sliding the belt off. Your fingertips skimmed along his trousers, feeling the shape of his cock with a gentle press and rub. A small sigh left his lips.
Unzipping the zipper, you reached your hand into his trousers and pulled his underwear down just enough to give yourself some freedom to work with. His erection stood tall against his abdomen. Harper glanced down at you momentarily, meeting your eyes right as you were bringing your lips onto the tip of his cock.
His fingers tensed against his pen in his hand but he said nothing.
"Doctor Harper?" The nurse was worried about his sudden shift in focus, which prompted his gaze away from you. "Are you okay?"
"It's fine," Harper answered a bit too quickly. His face was lightly flushed pink and he was trying his best to not give himself away. You enjoyed how swiftly he could lose his composure.
You hollowed out your cheeks and took in the head of his cock, rolling your tongue around to tease the head.
"Are you sure?" the nurse pushed further. You wrapped your lips around Harper and swallowed his cock deeper, inch by inch. A jagged inhale sounded through the office. "Should I go get you a coffee or some water? You don't look very well."
Harper coughed. "That's unnecessary. I- ah -just get back to work. Please. I-I'm busy. Very busy."
As much as you could get annoyed with him, he was cute stuttering like a mess above you. It wasn't a common sight, so naturally you'd want to take advantage of it. You took a slow, teasing drag up his length, stopping just as the tip left your lips. Harper was used to you being needier and greedy by now. Something as simple as a painfully slow blow job threw him for a loop. His hips jerked for the feeling of your hot mouth to be back on him, which you complied.
Once he was sure the door shut behind the nurse, Harper put down his pen, rolled his chair in further, and bucked into your mouth without warning. You sputtered from the intrusion of your throat being filled.
He wrapped his lithe fingers into your hair, holding you in place. Your throat swallowed around the thick length, and Harper shivered from the pleasant feeling. He was frantic to chase his release.
With a shuddering breath, he bucked into you a final time and came, keeping your head pushed down as he did. He looked down at you with a proud gaze. "Make sure to swallow, dear. It's good for you." He freed you from under his desk, still panting. He caressed your cheek once you resurfaced and kissed over your sensitive lips. "Good job."
"It was supposed to be my birthday, and here I was pleasing you," you grumbled.
Harper didn't seem to mind your pouting at all. He glanced at the clock in the top right of the room. "Don't worry, darling, you still didn't tell me what you want for your birthday." Harper's fingers brushed through your hair, straightening any stray hairs and loose strands. "I'm afraid we don't have any more time now, but I could pay you a visit tonight. Would that make you happy?"
Happy wasn't exactly the emotion you'd associate with Harper visiting your room late at night. Yet you nodded. "Can I have some birthday cake, too?" You couldn't recall the last time you had sweets like that. The hospital's version of sweets were fruit cups and yogurt. Harper must've noticed how excited you were at the simple mention of a cake since he smiled, a toothy and genuine smile. You found it a bit hard to believe that Doctor Harper of all people could do such a thing.
"I'll see what I can do."
#yandere#harper the doctor#harper dol#dol harper#dol#degrees of lewdity#smut#dol smut#i've never written smut on here i hope i did ok
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Yandere!Batboys as Villains with Robin!Darlings AU Masterlist
Bro I had an idea for this AU, what if some of the rouges like Scarecrow, Poison Ivy, Harley Quinn, Riddler were good in this AU, like they never became villains or enemies of Batman and or even allies of the Robins.





Like I could imagine that Dick’s darling developing extreme claustrophobia (fear of enclosed spaces) and hemophobia (fear of blood), along with a number of other traumas and phobias after being kidnapped and missing for over a month. It gets so bad for her that it does not just impact her vigilante work but even her day to day civilian life. So Bruce makes a few calls, looking for someone who may be able to help her in her current mental state and stumbles upon a psychologist who is a current professor at Gotham University and has a specialization in phobias, Dr. Jonathan Crane.
In this AU he would not be obsessed with fear like he is in other iterations of him, but instead due to his own trauma that his father put him through, he wants to help people who have gone through other highly traumatic experiences. So when he gets the call from Bruce Wayne about his adopted daughter and the things she had gone through, he accepts almost instantly, besides her story about getting kidnapped by a serial killer with a hero complex and highly unstable emotions was everywhere in Gotham.
He would drive to Wayne Manor after his lectures everyday and sit down and have sessions with Dick’s darling, psycho analyzing her and moving in to break down her trauma to get to the root problem. But he hears the stories about what exactly happened to her from her adoptive father, the GCPD files he got access to for her case, and then from her and then the things that happened to her is anyone’s worse nightmare.
Eventually they do make progress and after that is when Bruce green lights her for patrol again and that is how he finds out her identity. Dick’s darling saved his life during a mass attack on the city, she swings him out of the way and when she sets him down in a back alley and immediately makes sure he is okay is when everything clicks in place, he knows her mind inside and out by that point so when she is about to leave…
“Get somewhere safe, a basement or-“
“We’re going to discuss this at our next session, yes?”
“You knew?!”





I can picture Poison Ivy in this AU as a friend from school to Jason’s darling, a law major and a biology major hitting it off. They were originally supposed to be roommates but with the chaos that the life of a bat brings, Jason’s darling commutes to school. They are really close friends and a lot of their classmates joke that Jason’s darling is like Pamela’s sugar mama since she has access to Bruce Wayne’s credit card and she likes spoiling her friends.
In this AU, Pamela never becomes Poison Ivy but still she is an ally of her college friend. She found out about the identity of Jason’s darling when she was walking back to her dorm and she finds the injured vigilante hiding out behind the engineering building and immediately takes her inside to hide her and the mask accidentally falls off and there is a long awkward silence and…
“Is this why you dropped me as your roommate at the last minute?!”
“Um… ya…”
“…you bitch.”





Along with Ivy in this AU, I think Jason's darling would be friends with Edward Nygma, like I imagine him as another college student in this AU, a psychology major with an english minor, and it would be a trio with Ivy and Jason's darling. Unlike Ivy, I imagine he figures out her secret identity very quickly, so when he sees her as a vigilante, running and pretty badly injured at night, he just pulls his car over and yells at her to get in.
"Does everyone and their mother know my identity?"
"What, like it was hard?"
I also think it would be somewhat funny if they started helping her or became small-time vigilantes themselves. So say one time Jason's darling gets kidnapped by Jason most likely, Edward causes a distraction while Ivy knocks the goons out, so just Edward just walks up and like...
"I crack when I’m weary, tingle when I’m scared and stretch when I’m proud. What am I?"
"Really?"
"What?! You asked me to distract them!"
Or like the idea of Edward setting up traps to delay enemies so Jason's darling can move quicker but accidentally ends up catching the Batman in it and it is just a look of pure fear on Edward's face as he tries to apologize.
#yandere dc headcanon#yandere dc x reader#yandere dc#yandere batfam#yandere batfam x reader#yandere batfamily x reader#yandere batfamily#yandere dick grayson#yandere dick grayson x reader#yandere jason todd#yandere jason todd x reader#yandere tim drake x reader#yandere tim drake#yandere damian wayne x reader#yandere damian wayne#yandere bruce wayne x reader#yandere bruce wayne
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Lin Kuei bros get pegged like little bitches
I had someone DM me asking me to do this so no request window :( sad
Tw/cw: separate hcs, hand cuffs in Tomas' part, Bi Han being a bitch, pegging obviously, AFAB reader rimming and anal fingering(m! receiving)
No beta I will die like a man
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Bi Han
No.
This man is not letting you anywhere NEAR his ass.
It took him an extremely long time to consider it, but once he did start thinking about it, it was only a matter of time before he actually let you.
You guys ended up having as long talk about it, mainly for Bi Hans comfortability.
When you guys actually got to the session, it was a lot of stretching. Like, a lot.
Bi han hasn't really ever thought of putting something up is ass and because of that he isn't stretched. So, like a good girlfriend, you did it for him.
A fuck ton of lube later and you'd be pushing the strap slowly inside him.
He was trying his hardest not to make any sounds and make it seem like he wasn't having a good time, but you could see his face twitching in pleasure as you pushed in further.
You stay for a minute or two for him to adjust, as per request, and you could see his chest rising up and down, much faster than usual. His breath became heavy and he was holding the sheets slightly. He was enjoying this, but he wasn't going to admit it.
Once you did start moving, every small bit of his facade started to fade. He was desperately gripping at anything he could: the sheets, pillows, you. Anything.
He was desperately holding onto you as his head fell back in pleasure, biting his bottom lip so hard he ended up bleeding.
Slowly, his groans became more and more audible. His fingernails were digging into you harshly as his cock began twitching and leaking precum.
He'd be cursing under his breath and you could hear him silently begging for release, saying please over and over
Once he did cum, it was the harshest you've ever seen. He'd let out a guttural moan as ropes of cum would spew out of his cock, painting both you and himself.
He'd be practically panting throughout the entire aftercare. His head would still be back as he overcame his high and he'd flinch at your touch.
He wouldn't look you in the eyes afterwards. He'd have a rosy blush painted across his face as he'd avoid your gaze.
He'd give it a 2.5/10. He'd pretend he didn't like it, but deep down, he gives it a 9/10. He's probably thinking about asking you to peg him more often
Kuai Liang
Very open to try it. You propose the idea to him, explain what it is, and he's willing to try it
Kuai Liang seems like the type of person that would try anything at least once, and pegging is no exception. When you get the strap and show it to him, it suddenly hits him that he's about to do this, but he overcomes that when he sees how excited you are
He was admittedly nervous, but having you rim him was all he needed to get that out of his head.
When you begin to ease in the strap, he's begging you to move, almost immediately after it's all the way in.
When you do start moving, he's squirming. Like, everywhere.
Hes panting like a dog and he can't keep still, his hands are very indecisive on where he thinks they should be, flying from your waist, to the bedsheets, to the pillows, to your waist again, to settling on hanging onto the headboard.
He'd probably also be crushing you with his thighs. Like, instinctively, youre in-between them and so he's wrapping them around you, pulling you closer while also crushing you.
He probably wouldn't last long, you can see him twitching after a few minutes and he cums soon after.
Luckily, he's pretty vocal during sex, so he was also vocal here. He was showing you he was being pleasured, so he has to give it a good score, right?
He gives it a 6.5/10. He doesn't dislike it, far from it, but he'd do it very sparingly
He was also very energetic afterwards and insisted on pleasuring you, something he'd much rather do than get himself off.
Tomas
100% recommended it.
He even went out and bought one for you to use before asking 😭
Once you said yes he'd be ECSTATIC
He's always been really into rimming/anal fingering so stretching him out was no problem.
He'd probably like... Want you to handcuff him to the bed before you pegged him.
Full on CUFFED to the bed. Legs too probably he a freak like that
Hes probably really into sensory deprivation which is why he wanted his first time to be like this, would probably go vanilla next time around
Once you got the strap in, he wants you to move, like, immediately
He's begging for you to move
So you do
And he cannot handle it
He's squirming, he's twitching, he's trying to touch you but he can't. All of them above. And he loves it.
He can feel you hit his g spot I've and over and his head falls back, mouth agape as he moans your name repeatedly
His back began to arch and you can see his cock twitch repeatedly. At this point, you can't even see his face, but you know it's contorted
Also wouldn't last long. Like, at all. He's so sensitive and knowing you, his girlfriend, is pegging him, something he always wanted, has him cumming very early.
He wouldn't be lying if he said this exact scenario has gone through his head consistently
And because of that, he practically screams your name as he releases
Back still arched, he'd be thanking you over and over for doing this and he'd fall asleep immediately after
He'd rate it a 10/10. Most definitely asking you to peg him multiple times a week now
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A/N:eil Gaiman????? What are you doing in my falafel??!!
#mortal kombat smut#mortal kombat x reader#mortal kombat x reader smut#bi han mortal kombat#bi han x reader#bi han smut#bi han x reader smut#kuai liang x reader smut#kuai liang x reader#kuai liang smut#tomas vrbada#tomas vrbada x reader#tomas vrbada smut#tomas vrbada x reader smut#lin kuei x reader
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Could you do Johnny, Kitana, Kung Lao, Syzoth, and/or Smoke w/ a reader who has a Katya Zamolodchikova type personality/sense of humour? I'm talking pure chaos, but with a loving and caring vulnerable side. :)
──★ ˙ ̟ Johnny Cage, Kitana, Kung Lao, Syzoth and Smoke x GN!reader with a Katya personality
Note: I watched so much rupauls drag race just for this request because i was so scared of getting something wrong oh god i really hope you like it also @rueschronic you saved me i love you bitch
「 ✦ Kung Lao ✦ 」
* SHIT TALKING DUO
* you and Kung Lao are competitive and like to show off both of you can walk into any place and all eyes are on yall
* Both of you lift each other up as much as you can because you and Kung lao both know what it feels like to put on a character/facade or joke around people even when your hurting on the inside or try to hide it to appear fine
* When you called him queen he wore that like a badge of honour
* He picks up your vocabulary extremely fast and manages to confuse everyone around him
「 ✦ Johnny cage ✦ 」
* THE duo not a duo it’s THE duo
* I feel like Johnny has wanted to try out more ,,feminine” things but due to holywood and it being looked down upon he hasn’t yet until you gave him reality check and remined him that no one cares (bitch)
* Like Kung lao you and Johnny have that one thing in common: a character. Both of you act a certain way and have built a character to show off to people. People know ,,Johnny Cage” but do they know John Carlton. As more time passes you and Johnny start working on tearing those walls down and showing your true honest selves of course without loosing those confident attitudes
* Clubbing, going out, after party’s all the time most weekends will be endend with you and Johnny at his house not knowing how you got back home but not really needing to know because you’ll be too busy cuddling one another
* Has definitely asked you to be stunt performer because he knows that you can strut your shit like a its a performance
「 ✦ Kitana ✦ 」
* You captured Kitanas attention right away
* Kitana enjoys her status and work as a princess of Outworld but it does become dull at points. The people being careful around her, underestimating her and treating her almost like a porcelain doll
* Not you tho you treat Kitana like a normal person, tell her things honestly and aren’t afraid of what she can do
* Kitana is very observant she sees that you hide behind jokes and when she finally confront you about you let eveything out. All the toughts of self doubt, anxiety are washed away with promises from her to protect you and keep you safe for as long as she is alive
* A lot of time with Kitana and you is spent sparring or you telling her about Earthrealm, languages and culture (Kitana is prob a history nerd sue me)
「 ✦ Syzoth ✦ 」
* He was enamoured by you at first sight
* Because of his zetteran liniage Syzoth understands your struggles. Wanting to be yourself but the world rejecting it deeming it ,,too much” or even distasteful. He assures you to the best of his abilities that he’ll never leave you and will stay by your side no matter what
* ,,mother? But im a man” ,,slay ? Slay what ?” Her a little confused when it come to slang but slowly starts to understand it
* If you do drag or are interested in drag TELL IT ALL TO THIS MAN. Syzoth absolutely loves learning about earthrealm its cultures and norms and how people express themselves
* You insulted him once in a joking way and he didn’t understand that you were joking and it ended up in a hugs and kisses session for like 30 min and a long as hell explanation
「 ✦ Smoke ✦ 」
* The walking definition of polar opposites
* Smoke is quiet ,reserved and introverted meanwhile your loud, not afraid to make a scene and get dirty and extroverted
* ,,Excuse me he asked for no pickles” you say as Smoke stands in the background like a wet puppy
* Smoke is the only person who knows about your anxiety’s he does his best to assure that you are loved for who you are
* If you do nails he’s constantly asking you to do his. Smoke just really enjoys having pretty nails that match with his beautiful partner
*. ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚
#mk1#mortal kombat#mortal kombat x reader#mortal kombat 1#mortal kombat 1 x reader#mortal kombat x gn reader#kung lao#johnny cage#mk 1 smoke#tomas vrbada#syzoth#reptile#kitana#kung lao x reader#johnny cage x reader#mk1 smoke x reader#smoke x reader#tomas vrbada x reader#tomas x reader#syzoth x reader#reptile x reader#kitana x raiden#mk headcanons#mortal kombat headcanons#i got addicted to watching katya and trixie because of this request#im gay but i dont watch rupauls drag race#:3
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sorry if this is old/annoying disk horse, or it's addressed later on in canon (i haven't been in the fandom long and i'm on season 6 of the show), but what do you think about john winchester being another righteous man? do you think he really was, or it was mostly just a manipulation tactic (from, if i am remembering correctly, the angels)? i remember the show saying he went through 100 years of torture and didn't break, which was a bit wild to me, but y'know what, sure. alternatively, any thoughts on the fan theory from samgirls that sam is (unintentionally) the righteous man?
feel free to ignore if this is not your thing, or if it really is just annoying disk horse to go through, but i'd love to know your thoughts.
"The righteous man" is a story familiar to the angels and the demons. The prophecy foretold about the righteous man was that he would 1) shed blood in hell, breaking the first seal, and 2) be the only one who could end the apocalypse.
The bit about John being the original righteous man and not breaking on the rack was Alastair's manipulation tactic in 4.16 "On The Head Of A Pin":
I had your pop on my rack for close to a century. [...] John Winchester. Made a good name for himself. A hundred years. After each session, I'd make him the same offer I made you. I'd put down my blade if he picked one up. [...] But he said nein each and every time. Oh, damned if I couldn't break him.
And then a little later:
ALASTAIR: You know, it was supposed to be your father. He was supposed to bring it on. But, in the end, it was you. DEAN: Bring what on? ALASTAIR: Oh, every night, the same offer, remember? Same as your father. And finally you said, "Sign me up." Oh, the first time you picked up my razor, the first time you sliced into that weeping bitch... That was the first seal. DEAN: You're lying. ALASTAIR: And it is written that the first seal shall be broken when a righteous man sheds blood in hell. As he breaks, so shall it break. We had to break the first seal before any others. Only way to get the dominoes to fall, right? Topple the one at the front of the line. When we win, when we bring on the apocalypse and burn this earth down, we'll owe it all to you, Dean Winchester. Believe me, son, I wouldn't lie about this. It's kind of a religious sort of thing with me.
John was never "the righteous man" meant to shed blood in hell though, so Alastair is lying at least in part (when he says it was "supposed" to be John). The concept of "the righteous man" originates with the angels/god, and Gabriel says in 5.08 that the archangels were always told it would be Dean and Sam who would be the vessels of the apocalypse who would end things, for the purpose of narrative symmetry with Michael and Lucifer.
You sorry sons of bitches. Why do you think you two are the vessels? Think about it. Michael, the big brother, loyal to an absent father, and Lucifer, the little brother, rebellious of Daddy's plan. You were born to this, boys. It's your destiny! It was always you! As it is in heaven, so it must be on earth. One brother has to kill the other. [...] Why do you think I've always taken such an interest in you? Because from the moment Dad flipped on the lights around here, we knew it was all gonna end with you. Always.
@swordofsun makes an excellent case here that while the angels knew Dean was "the righteous man" the whole time, the demons may have believed it was John they needed for a time. However, there's also reason to suspect the demons found out rather early that John wasn't the person they needed to break (Dean is offered a crossroads deal to trade his soul for John's by 2.08) so it's unlikely John was tortured for anywhere near 100 years in Alastair-torture-chamber-time. Alastair has a motive to twist the truth. He's noticing water dripping from a pipe about to break the devil's trap, and wants Dean distracted so he doesn't have time to warn Cas and Uriel. Alastair is also an extreme sadist, and he knows that John is a sore spot and that telling Dean not just that he broke the first seal but that his father was supposed to break it but was unbreakable would cause Dean immense emotional pain. It's not only something that causes Dean to feel incredible shame and guilt, but continues the narrative of Dean inheriting burdens intended for John that he can't carry.
any thoughts on the fan theory from samgirls that sam is (unintentionally) the righteous man?
Alright. So. In the sense that Sam shoves Michael and Lucifer in The Cage thus "ending" the apocalypse it was foretold only "the righteous man" could end, I get what the argument is here. The problem is that from a practical standpoint, Sam doesn't break the first seal, so he already isn't the righteous man because of that. Additionally, Dean's arrival at Stull Cemetery is what actually allows Sam to take control over his body again. Without Dean showing up, Sam would never have taken back control of his body and the apocalypse would have happened anyway. So in a sense, the prophecy still transpires in a roundabout way through Dean breaking the first seal, then ending the apocalypse by showing up at Stull, making Lucifer angry (which destabilizes his control) while drawing Sam's consciousness to the surface so he can shove Lucifer and Michael into The Cage.
Practicalities of whether Sam fits the prophecy aside, I think the desire to frame Sam as the righteous man likely comes from a misplaced belief that the title of "righteous man" conveys actual status. The title of "righteous man" itself was a manipulative tactic intended to instill a sense of duty in Dean (that honestly worked very poorly because Dean simply isn't like Michael) and a sense of envy and inadequacy in Sam that would drive the brothers apart. The concept of "the righteous man" wasn't ever an honor or reward. It was a burden and a horror. It was a title bestowed on someone intended to be horrifically tortured, used, objectified, and forced to kill his own brother for the (alleged) "greater good". It is a huge mistake to envy that title and see it as a sign of status instead of shoving aside the curtain hiding the Wizard of Oz and recognizing that "the righteous man" and "the boy king of hell" were glorified titles for angel condoms being manipulated and used.
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Butterfly demon reader pt. 2 - Wing care group hc/drabble-y
Cw: SFW, total fluff, gn!reader - in which Vaggie, Husk, and reader preen each other's wings
< Part 1
- In the beginning, Vaggie is hesitant to let you or Husk touch her wings. She just got them back, she doesn't want them to get harmed at all.
- However, not letting anyone help with upkeep would be leaving her wings even more vulnerable to damage. So she agrees to it eventually.
- The topic originally came up because Vaggie was concerned about your wings
- They are so delicate and prone to being damaged by so many things. If you even just brushed up against things accidentally and had too much of your scales come off it could be bad!
- Assuring her you had a lot and could replenish them after a certain amount of time didn't do much either.
- After the Angel's attacked the hotel, your wings were left tattered in places, and she had absolutely fretted over it. Helping you take care of them until they healed up.
- She was taken aback when you asked if you could help preen her own wings, but after some convincing let you.
- After she got over her initial hesitance and slight discomfort with having them touched, she couldn't lie that after so long, having delicate touches gently correcting her feathers and brushing them out felt incredible.
- That's how wing care group began.
- Every Monday at 8pm, you and Vaggie meet up for an hour (or more if it turns out that way) to help one-another clean and maintain one-another's wings.
- In these sessions you usually just talk about random stuff and gossip a bit.
- You make tea and snacks, and essentially just chill out together doing whatever.
- Sometimes other members of the hotel will join you two to do whatnot while you work on each other.
- One of these times is how you two rope Husk into it.
- You'd set up in the TV room (you usually met for it in your hotel room) because you saw a movie you thought Vaggie may have liked, and Husk was there watching you two go about stuff with disgust on his face from behind the bar.
- "Do you two have to do that shit here?" Husk asks with clear distaste.
- A remark he'd regret making because next thing he knows, you and Vaggie are picking him up by either arm guiding him into the seat of wing attentionTM and are sitting him down in it.
- He of course tries to get out of it, but you end up convincing him to stay miraculously.
- By the end of you two working to groom his wings, he's purring begrudgingly with the bitterest look on his face, trying to say he doesn't like it.
- You call his bullshit and he goes quiet with an even more sour look on his face.
- Despite 'not liking it', he ends up showing up next Monday again.
- He flips you off as you grin at him and say you were glad he was joining you two again.
- And that's how the three of you as your strange trio begin to weekly preen one-another. All the while getting in some great shit-talking and bitching sessions about stuff that's been going on in each of your lives.
- Other members of the hotel sometimes join in, but they don't ever get in as deep into the bond from it as you three share.
- Charlie often comes in to gawk and join in on your discussions, but usually doesn't consistently show as although she wants to be part of the stuff she sees this as really important bonding time just for the three of you (which is true)
- Angel sometimes comes in to the meetings while he's bored and wanting to bitch or asking Husk about the location of different booze in the bar.
- Pentious keeps trying to join you three saying you can help him with his tail and he'll help you with your wings, but it doesn't work as he isn't gentle enough with your wings the first time and ends up tearing one.
- The other two are extremely protective of you and your wings in particular, knowing first hand how easily they are harmed, so even with you saying it was fine with your wing slightly torn, the other two chuck him out.
- Niffty sometimes tries to crash the meeting to try get pieces of you, but the other two keep her from getting to you. You placate her with the excess feathers from the other two's wings and things your scales have brushed off onto. You don't tell the others about this.
- Alastor comes in to watch you all to make you uncomfortable even though he thinks it's gross.
- Especially Husk.
- You and Vaggie usually throw him out of there as soon as he randomly materialises in there without warning to be an asshole.
- It's an odd sight to see a fallen angel, an avian cat demon, and a butterfly demon preening each other, but the three of you become rather close due to it and you all would not have it any other way.
- You are all very protective of one-another after everything - especially Vaggie and Husk of you. If anything ever happens to you now, there's gonna be absolute hell to pay.
- You three all love the time you spend together every Monday night.
- Even if some people (Husk) would never admit it.
Rare fluff content from me 💀
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel husk x reader#hazbin hotel husk headcanons#hazbin hotel husk#hazbin hotel vaggie#hazbin hotel vaggie x reader#vaggie x reader#vaggie headcanons#hazbin hotel charlie#hazbin hotel niffty#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel pentious#hazbin hotel headcanon
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Tbh this is more me bitching about once again wasting money on a game I probably won't be able to finish due to cripple-itus but we're going to pretend it's a serious discussion on game design.
So to preface: my vision is fucked. Irrevocably. Like get discounts on insurance levels of fucked. But games, even very difficult ones still Often very doable and fun.
One of my favorite genres is "white dot goes on a combat platforming adventure" Ie metroidvania/soulslikes that either Are hollow knight or heavily inspired by hollow knight
And I just want to compare a Good white dot, against an extremely irritating white dot.
This is yi. He is an edgy cat boy. he is a good white dot.
No matter the amount of bullshit on screen or the background color, you can always quickly find the white dot that is Yi or his lil robe.



This Bo. They are a bad white dot. they look like they'd be a Good white dot, what with the really clear silhouette of their ears and strong red markings
This is Bo in the game.





Bo breaks the number 1 rule of being a white dot: they end up the same color as the background because neat light effects which do look Great, were more important than the ability to find you're guy while doing minute long don't touch the ground style parkour sessions.
Like Hollowknight and Nine Sols, Path of the teal lotus uses a lot of forground and back ground layers to create a very nice sense of depth. However the foreground layers frequently completely cover the lower half of Bo's body. often making them a light colored dot on a noisy light colored back ground.
The fact background and play ground elements are often the same color does not help. Nor does the fact the camera is . Bad. it just is. It zooms in and out in the middle of a screen making it extremely difficult to keep track of an already hard to follow character in a setting where. losing track of your guy means getting sent back to the beginning of a tedious boss fight or a prolonged parkour session (which to be clear, would be good if you could track your player character. not the bosses though. They are. bad. they need to attack faster, have more than 2 attacks, or at least have a fraction of the HP they do. so you're not just standing around waiting for them to decide to start up another attack to open a vulnerability window.)
And I'm just going to say it, Someone on the team knew the game had this issue. Because they gave you a fix that doesn't work. You can adjust brightness, contrast, and saturation. None of these fix the issue of Bo disappearing. The game is so blown out that no combination of settings produce a result where bo is consistently visible, and also you can tell whats background and what's something you can stand on.
Anyways Demos are an accessibility feature, and when they're not available don't be lazy like I was and just pirate it. If the devs aren't going to give you a way to check if their shit is busted or not, you'll just have to find one yourself.
Anyways anyways tldr absolutely Gorgeous game, Should've been a silent animated movie instead because it's nearly unplayable and the translators either did a Really bad job, or the writers just didn't get why the jokes they're copying were funny
#elden ring is also a 'white dot goes on an adventure' game. the white dot is just the auto targeting reticle instead of Scrimbly#My horrible son who i made as white dot adjacent as i could. He doesn't get to wear hats unles theyre funny or cat heads#im having trouble finding screenshots bc i Cant Find Bo in them and so don't know if bo just. isnt there.#its like wheres waldo. But its the player character.#i shouldn't be questioning whether or noth the Guy is there in a normal screeny of your game#idk maybe im over exaggerating#also potl is the first game ive ever played where on my first play through. before ive gotten to know all the movement and combat#ive wanted to be able to speed up the game. Like Celeste lets you turn the speed down? This needs the opposite. Extremely sluggish and it's#made worse because it slows down even more Constantly#near an edge near something you can pogo on near an enemy projectile you can do the Ori redirect thing with#near an enemy#when you're pogoing#it just feels bad man.#its not even Consistent#anyways play nine sols. Its really good#I like Ji. <Anyone who knows my vibe of character and also this game just rolled their eyes#Jiequan is cool too but im still mad they didn't draw his dick. iykyk
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S/O is interested in fashion (alternative, cutesy, bold, etc.) And they're really want to try some outfits with their boyfriend! (Main skellies but you are free to add anyone you want!)
Undertale Sans - Whatever suits your boat. Sans doesn't mind playing along with whatever you're doing, but he's also doing it with minimal effort or wrongly just to tease you a little. Well, you're still not sure if he put his shirt backward on purpose or not if you're honest, he's good at making you doubt if he's messing with you or not. He's clowning around, but that's fun.
Undertale Papyrus - He's happy to help, but he's also very dissipated and wants to try other things too. You leave the shop with so many clothes you know your wallet is so going to regret it later. Papyrus likes matching clothes, but as soon as you're home, he goes in his room to Papyrusified them because he doesn't like matching too much.
Underswap Sans - He says yes at the first thing you're both trying and then looks at you with hopeful eyes, begging you to say the torture session is over and that he can go do something else now. He's not patient enough for this. If it lasts too long, he will start whimpering loud enough just to be annoying.
Underswap Papyrus - He likes fashion too, even though he doesn't have an opportunity to show it too often because money is tight. He's glad he can have a bit of fun with you. He can even show you how to handmake clothes a bit, as he's good at it.
Underfell Sans - Please kill him. It's booooring. Please do whatever you want with his body but for the love of Asgore, do it quickly. That's definitely not what he had in mind when you said you wanted to spend time with him. Well, it's maybe not too late for his vision of hanging out together, you know 😏
Underfell Papyrus - It's a nightmare. You realize you both have a very different fashion sense. Edge is pouting and refusing to try anything not going the way he wants and won't stop criticizing the clothes if you insist anyway. It ends with Edge telling you to buy whatever you want while he buys whatever he wants. You don't match, but it's better than screaming at each other.
Horrortale Sans - He doesn't mind playing along but, uh, you quickly realize it's not exactly easy as Oak doesn't fit in most human clothes. It would probably be best to go handmade if you want him to match you. He also has a strict rule of nothing on his head. Oak is a bit sad nothing suits him, but you're cheering him saying it's just humans who don't deserve monsters.
Horrortale Papyrus - He's extremely uncomfortable. He's fine to try one or two, but his fear of people looking at him quickly comes back and he starts to get really anxious, to the point he randomly leaves the shop to get some fresh air. He really wants to do better than this, but he's not ready yet. His body is a sensitive subject, and he has a hard time finding anything looking good on him. It's best to let him initiate this next time.
Swapfell Sans - If accepts to do it, at the only condition the clothes are handmade. He hates the clothes everyone has. And don't even insult him by saying handmade clothes are expensive, he's literally the heir of the queen so the old bitch is paying for you two to look good. You have a lot fewer regrets now that you know it's Toriel's money you're spending.
Swapfell Papyrus - You agreed on picking each a piece of clothing you like. Rus chooses the ugliest ones on purpose, just because your reaction is funny. You both look like clowns, but you refuse to change clothes purely out of spite and to show Rus you don't care about his humor. Rus is the only one parading when you're getting out of there though. He thinks it's hilarious how everyone is staring at you.
Fellswap Gold Sans - Well, yes, but he's definitely choosing lol. Fashion is his thing too and he wants only very expensive clothes which you clearly have no experience in. You're a little offended by that but you have to admit Wine's choices are really good. And surprising. He picks things you really don't use to wear, assuring you it will look perfect on you, and damn he's right. It's witchcraft how good he is at that.
Fellswap Gold Papyrus - Hum... He's not sure about that... He understands you want to match and everything but his little autism hates all the textures of the clothes you tried so far and he's more and more reluctant to try others. He's fine with just his hoodie, you know? He really doesn't need something more. It's kinda stressing him out too, as he can see you're expecting him to like at least something after two hours, but, uh, that's just not working. He's scared you might be mad at him too.
#undertale#underswap#underfell#horrortale#swapfell#fellswap gold#sans#papyrus#undertale ask blog#undertale asks#undertale imagines#undertale headcanons
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