#EEEEEEEEEEEH

[omarfor-orchestra]

ZIA PERÒ COSÌ È UN PO' TROPPO SANREMO

[zeldamphibiedalls]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOTW

AND WILD FROM LINKED UNIVERSE

[holykhepri]

I just kind of drew over Megalo Don's model and tried to guess his face shape based on that. I don't know if I'm content with it in the way that this is how I view him, I'm not sure. I like it! But I'm not sure. (he looks kinda young? maybe? idk.)

I also wondered about his personal flag, and why does it look like that.....so I imagined he has like ?shark bite? scars on his face that make his eye a bit droopy. Double idea that he also got bitten at his throat and that's why he BREATHES the way he breathes. I also imagine he has sharper teeth and (not pictured) a tongue piercing heh heh.

[mrghostrat]

You got me addicted to good omens human aus. Now I can't stop thinking of your fics and your future fic ideas and my own ideas. I can't focus on anything else you've rotted my brain. (I have not stopped thinking about the dreamland au since your first post about it)

[kakusu-shipping]

My mini contribution to @echoes-lighthouse's Evil Slasher Orphanage! My wife Anna and I are here to help, and brought a few more kids of our own.

I really thought I was a horror fan until I sat down to draw this and came up blank. I guess I'm not a slasher guy, because a LOT more Monsters and Beasts came to mind, so it took a while to form a list. Though I did include Sam who is certainly a Creeture but.. They're human enough.

[diwns]

ik for a fact the moment i bought the ps5 that it'd be my dead sims era

[shiroselia]

Ingen som känner för o stämma SVT för brott mot GDPR?

[convxction]

Walhart: You forget your place, BOY. I am the Conqueror! I will unite the world! Chrom: No! ...I will. And not by FORCING all the people to choose the sword or the knee. Peace will only come by stoking people's hearts...not their fear.

🇨​🇴​🇳​🇻​🇮​🇨​🇹​🇮​🇴​🇳​: a STRONG belief that is not likely to change, or the strong feeling that your beliefs are RIGHT.

Independent & Selective & canon & *headcanon compliment & **mix between Eng. & Jp portrayal & multi ship & multi verse & oc friendly ♔𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐦 of Fire Emblem: Awakening / 覚醒Kakusei / 13 Roleplay blog. Shepherd by Faty and you can find me also @/sentofight a multi muses blog.

*headcanon: I have built chrom for years now so he is mostly based on how I interpret some events & dialogues & interactions featuring him or other characters who have mentioned him.

**mix of eng & jp: I do not entertain the idea of chrom being the butt of jokes in the f.e. h.eroes universe or any other eng. localization. don't get me wrong, i love a good humor but only when it does not rib and butcher a muse's character. i add some elements from the japanese lines to compliment my own portrayal of him. you are free to ask me to elaborate more about this. i love to share no worries! that does not mean that all eng lines are crap ok? i stand by the "You deserved better from me than one sword and a world of troubles." best line for chrom and it is the english one. in your face haters.

the three big rules: ♔have fun & ♔be patient & ♔be respectful & ♔drink water--ah, these are four LOL

♔SHEPHERDS' HQ || ♔ RULES || ♔KING || ♔ INQUIRIES || ♔ VERSES || ♔HEADCANONS || ♔ THREADS || ♔ SUPPORTS

special posts section:

Birthday celebration tag | birthday celebration post

[crowshoots]

sometimes i get a little deranged and a little crazy about how. unfinished jesper's arc is, about the fact that they have years of unlearning a mindset of fear and finally letting a vital part of themself be free rather than hidden away. that kaz and jesper's original fight was left unaddressed and never fully smoothed over because jesper would not take the 'someone i didn't want to lose' as an excuse for how shit kaz treated him. and that he has so much he needs to fix and he's trying, gods, he's trying

[evilminji]

Oh god :Dc a Danny Summons Contract

No you guys DON'T UNDERSTAND-!

Just. Danny! Only Danny! He fucked up. Some ancient Warring States Ninja fucked up. They BOTH agreed to NEVER talk about it again.

Cause like? That ninja? Was a GROWN ASS MAN. A qualified BAMF of the highest order. He WAS the Danger, thank you very much. So, he? Will NEVER live down being saved by...well...

*holds up wildly struggling, noodle limbed, sad wet raccoon havin a terrible day lookin, meat thresher on legs*

THIS.

It's a BABY. Honestly, his Clan's TODDLERS know how to throw better punch. This scrawny infant baby child is both? His new son. AND an embarrassing trainwreck in motion. FFS kid, that's not how you- No! NO! Don't you DARE bite that opponent! You don't know where they've B-!

Kid they could have BEEN POISONED!!! Spit um OUT! DROP UM! Drop that RIGHT NOW! What are you? A dead Inuzuka? A god forsaken Hatake!? DROP IT!!!

It...sure is An Adventure™.

One of many early "here's how you DON'T make a Summoning contract" experiments, that Clans without seal masters were attempting. He's honestly lucky HIS attempt ended with him still... you know... ALIVE. Problem, though? After bunking for like... a few months? A year? In the command center?

And you know, terrorizing the GIW into complete collapse. Parenting him through some pretty serious life changes. Somehow making Sam MORE terrifying. And a whole host of off screen ninja shenanigans? They figure out? Oh. Only way to send him HOME is to either accept or refuse a Contract.

They gotta make one.

First they head to Frostbite for a recommendation, then? Off to a reputable Ghost Lawyer they go! They have to camp in the waiting room for like... a week. But? Worth it! The contract is AMAZING. And terrifying! Protects them both. Can't be used against EITHER. And that loophole you're thinking off? Ten pages worth of point 4 script, twenty three yards down, for why it's a BAD IDEA and breaks contract~!

Neither of them can make the other do SHIT! Only fully consensual, mutually beneficial, ass kicking here! If we FEEL LIKE IT!

Ninja dad insisted. Never sign a contract with anything less then extreme paranoia, kid! Leave no "implied" or "spirit of the rules"! Loopholes are holes in your armor, with which your enemy stabs you in the back!

Danny, tearfully, sends ninja dad home.

Gross. Emotions all over his armor. If only there wasn't all this sand in his eyes, he'd definitely complain about it. *stoic ninja hug*

Danny? Become a king. One of many. An Ancient. Becomes FUCKING HUUUUUUUUGE. Like? "Aw, your city is so pwecious~☆ n smol~♡! Whats it called again? New York?" Huge. A fuckin LEVIATHAN made of void, stars, and space ice. A Winter corpse, marked by lightning, that became the night sky itself. With a crown of aurora borealis, ever shifting, like flame.

Proportional, in a way, to Summon Bosses. Just as a normal human is to a normal toad, a normal cat, a normal slug. So too, is Danny LARGER then them.

You know... when he feels like it.

The contract? Passes down. Ninja dad does warn his kin. Prooooobably not gonna answer you. He only answers ME cause I'm, well, ME.

Fuckin BET. They declare. And lose. Repeatedly.

Time marches on. The Senju and Uchiha has their Drama. Dear KAMI do they Have Their Drama. Please Stop, says everyone. They... do not. The contract? Fuckin STOLEN. Because of course it is.

It's a HUGE, glowing, death radiating Summons Contract kept in a shrine behind like... SO MANY seals. It makes anyone less then a full grown JOUNIN physically SICK to even touch! Prolonged exposure kills people! Of COURSE it gets fuckin stolen. It's obviously a super, mega, ultra rare AMAZEBALLS Summon Contract... right?

Eeeeeeeeeeeh *so-so hand motion* KINDA!

It IS technically that.

They ain't wrong. Cause Danny IS an Adult now. A King. Connected to the Zone. An ANCIENT. Beyond and Above his mortal origins, even as, by being a Halfa, he is utterly the same. That contract is as close as one could GET to having a contract with the Sage himself.

You know... if he answered you.

Felt like your petty bullshit was worth getting up off the couch for.

Not to MENTION? He can make clones! Like.... billions of them now. Has a skeleton army. Is kinda one of the stronger Ancients. But that's not the point. The POINT? Clones. Don't have to be EQUAL facets of self.

You CAN make a .00001% clone of yourself!

Behold *summons poof noise* Lil Baby Man!

The harbinger of Danny! Here to Test Your VIBEZ™. He sends them each time. To be an adorable menace. Cause problems on purpose. Be gremlins, chew on table legs, maybe. You know, the works! They RADIATE his " I Am Death." Energy. But also his "winter, protection, and starlight" vibes... if you're brave enough to LOOK.

If you don't flinch away from a spirit of the dead. Can embrace the chaotic nature of a Zone ghost. Are kind to something that isn't what you expected, that you can USE, that appears weaker then you. Something that seems dumb. Distractable. Useless in battle.

Can you be kind? Do you immediately give up? To recognize a test when you see one? Is your first impulse cruelty? Distain? It tells Danny a lot. Saves him time.

Which? Is how a young Itachi, freshly Jounin'd, gets thrown through an old and rotting wooden gate into what LOOKS like a vaguely demonic death shrine. Hmmm, concerning. Baby 'tachi has been separated from his teammates. Is having a Bad Time™. The crows can't really help much here.

And, well, that IS a Summoning contract...

He's outnumbered. Low on both weapons and Chakra. Refuses to do anything BUT return home to his family. His baby brother. Is it WISE? No. It is in fact, incredibly, incredibly UNWISE. He has no idea what he'll be agreeing too. But... so long as he live just a bit longer...

He slams an earth wall against the entrance.

Falls back to the Glowing Contract.

Stumbles, as even landing near it makes his insides revolt. His skin prickle and burn. Colder then the nine tails Chakra, emptier, yet somehow endlessly more ABSOLUTE.

It's like the very Chakra in his body screams against it. Rejects it's mere presence. As though all thing alive REFUSE it with desperation and fear. He has no time to muse upon this. It hurt his hand to touch. He does so anyway. Struggling to hold the earthwall against enemy attacks.

He doesn't bother to read the contract. Flings it from the pedestal, to unravel, so he may sign quickly. There. With a practiced motion, he nicks his finger, and scrawls his future away. Whatever demons may come. Whatever monsters this brings. Please... let him live long enough to say goodbye.

The world CRACKS as he summons.

Death and the Shinigami are not the same.

Even those without the ability to sense are battered by the tsunami of... not killing intent. No. There is no intent. No killing. Just... knowing. Heraldry. That Death comes for us all. You can not escape. Foolish and small, is this what you waste your existence on? Ants before a god. Dust before the heavens. He... he can not... breathe...

Frozen. Eyes wide. Sharigan spinning, spinning, spinning. Capturing the delicate lace of nothingness, absence of life, as it drifts by. Unable to move from where he kneels, bloody hand pressed to the ground, in a Summoning.

What Has He Done?

Outside there is panic. Screaming. They flee. He... he wishes he could flee. W...why can't he-? *THHHWAP!* Mmmmph?! Something small and almost bird shaped smacks into his face like a flung ration. Tiny arms spread wide to cling to his bangs and dangle. The deathy power fades... almost... almost as though it were... a threat display?

He focuses on the tiny creature whining and hugging his face. It... is a floating snake toddler? Or is it dragon? They have sharp little claws and stars along their face, a tiny whispy mane of white. Likely a dragon child then. They stick their small tounge out slightly, eyes the blankly trusting stare of small children everywhere.

He clearly want to be carried. Ah. Of course, little one.

Did... did he agree to raise a dragon?

Just?

Itachi, smol. Serious. With lil baby man floped on his head or tucked lovingly in his arms. The TEXTBOOK definition of "he don't bite" "YES HE DO!!!" For everyone but Itachi and Sasuke. To whom he is, of course, an INNOCENT BABY who has NEVER done anything wrong EVER. An angel! Why is everyone being so MEAN to poor innocent baby man? Boo hoo~!

It fucks up SO MANY plans.

Because Itachi. A smol child. INSISTS he is a Father now. What are you going to do? Say he can be? Why? Because he's a CHILD? Which is it? Is he a Jounin or a Dependant? An adult in the eyes of the law or a child to be protected by said law from pushing him off to war? Old enough to die, old enough to parent his dragon son!

And SORRY Father, he CANT join Anbu. Who would be there for his child? Ah, he should join a parenting group. *various competent parent instincts go haywire over this tiny Uchiha child in need of parenting* Danzo? For some reason his son seems to really, REALLY hate him. Better avoid him. His child doesn't know yet not to bite respected elders.

Sasuke? Gets to be an UNCLE! To a DRAGON! He takes his job very seriously.

It's the best PR the clan has ever had.

@hdgnj @babbling-babull @hypewinter @nerdpoe @the-witchhunter @legitimatesatanspawn @lolottes @mutable-manifestation

[ask-ikepriemma]

Beware of the princes on this app 😳...

Haha, you think they’re crazy on this app? Try dealing with them in real life @-@

eeeeeeeeeeeh….

[mossygirl333]

Tiramisu, Flourless cake, Daiquiri (One night stand), Boba Tea

Astarion x Reader

A night at the tavern turns steamy after the (drunkenly audacious) reader coaxes Astarion into playing a card game, and instead of betting with gold, they bet with "I'll do anything you want,". Reader thinks they can never have the handsome elf for themselves, but the reader's sudden victory surprises both of them.

AN: OMG OMG OMG EEEEEEEEEEEH! YES YES YES!!!

Astarion x f!reader

Bakery Order: Tiramisu- "Oh you're a drunk stupid thing arent you?" + Flourless cake - “A promise is a promise.” + Daiquiri- One night stand + Boba Tea - body worship

Cw/Tw: porn w/ a tiny bit of plot, drunk sex, cunnilingus, fingering, protected sex, degrading and praise, male masturbation, one night stand <333

SMUT UNDER THE CUT!!

You knew you were gonna lose, to this smart little bastard. It made you sick. He was a stupid, little cheating asshole. A stupid smirk on his face, half hidden with his cards.

The flush in your cheeks, tongue heavy with alcohol, you're head swam with frustration at the game and frustration with how good that man looked drunk.

Hair mused, thick white curls silver in moonlight and hiding his darkened wide pupils. Tongue sliding across those slick white teeth. His shirt was unbuttoned, the slight smell of sweat coming off his body from the too hot room. Only amplifying your feelings.

You ignored the cards he had hidden under the table, because even with the stupidity of it all and your hate for cheaters. You both wanted what you betted.

High on life in the beginning, freshly drunken and flushed. Mind swimming happy and heart lilt you spoke out,

"I bet for sex. I win, I have you for the night, you devious bastard."

He agreed too. Freshly drunk as well, the sexual frustrations of the day boiling over. You needed a good fuck, but you truly wondered if you would be in control or-

You look down.

He's done with his cards.

"I win..." He whispers, slightly slurred and sultry. Eyes darkened and blown out wide with desire. "are you sure you want this my sweet?"

"...a promise is a promise."

His rough hands pushed you into the bed, lips on yours. Wanting and devouring, barely coming up for air. You bared your throat, his tongue sliding across sharp fangs.

"Oh you are just a drunken stupid thing huh..?" He mocks in that sultry saccharine voice, nails digging into the soft flesh of your belly. "I like it."

Kissing down your jugular, pausing against your pulse before tasting it. Licking at your salty skin, before ripping open the front of your blouse.

"Astarion-" You moan out, tits bouncing forward out of your bodice. Sensitive and now exposed to the cold air, his mouth closes around them.

"Say my name darling...say it. Say it like you want me to fuck you." His words were harsh, swimming around in your foggy head. Pinging around in slow receptors, finally processing his voice.

"Astarion please." You plead, so softly. It was truly music to his ears. Your voice, the taste of your skin, he could smell your blood beneath it and how it made his head dizzy, delight creeping up. "Please fuck me..."

He chuckled, low and mocking under his breath as his kissed down your stomach. "Such. A. Beautiful. Delightful. Sinful. Creature you are..." He punctuation with each kiss, purring out your last name. Shocks of pleasure shiver down, settling in your core. A wave of fire, of heat and want rolled down your body slowly like a fog.

You laughed, his teeth scratching against your soft skin. Your pants soon unbuckling. Your cotton white underwear was slicken, full of your dew. Nectar for him to feast on.

His red eyes meet yours, blown out as he breaths in the smell of your arousal. Practically growling as he tosses your clothes aside. "Now you...are a treat I wasn't expecting." His nose nudges against the bottom of your panties, breathing in your slick. "But I am not complaining my dear."

You shudder, his sharp fingers sliding your underwear aside. Pushing his fingers into your wet folds, a pornographic squelch filling the room.

"Fuck-" You curse, the pad of his thumb brushing against the bead of your clit, pressing down.

"Such bad language from such a good girl." He chuckles, pumping his fingers in and out. "Do I have to punish you?"

"No." You whine, grinding against his hand. Desperate for him to hit that spot, that sweet spot deep inside. "Please, no."

"Please? Well, at least you know your manners." He curls his fingers up, sliding against that gooey spot. Eyes rolling back, a loud groan erupting from his chest.

"I need to taste you." He removes his fingers, hooking the glistening digits around your underwear and tossing them aside before promptly shoving his face in between your trembling thighs.

His tongue slides into your dripping hole, swirling around your clit as he moans, hips jerking up slightly as he swallows mouthfuls of your slick.

His pants unbuckle, hand wrapping around his thick cock. Head red and leaky drops of pearly sweet precum. He languidly strokes his dick, other hand forcing your hips to stay still as he laps at your cunt like a dog. Eyes rolled back in pure bliss.

"If this is how I feel tasting you-" He groans, whimpering into your folds. "God I need to feel what it's like to be in you, you pretty little drunken slut."

You shudder, feeling the coil inside you snap, a gush of slick entering his mouth. Pleasure ripped through your body like a cord finally giving way. Head swimming, body trembling, you felt as if you were on cloud nine. Your vision blurred, riding out the waves of pleasure as he cleaned your hole up.

Heady and tangy on his tongue, he gets up finally, chin still glistening. He forced you into position, grabbing something from his pocket and holding it in his mouth as he undid the rest of his pants.

"what's that..?" You slur, blinking languidly.

"Condom. Don't want any little hellish mistakes running around, with my genes, you'd have your hands full."

You nod, barely registering his words as you sink into the mattress. Hearing the package open and him slide the rubber onto his lubed up cock.

"Now just sit back...let me take care of you." He settled between your thighs, rubbing your hips.

You feel the covered head of his tip bump against your twitchy clit, body jerking slightly at the feeling. Searching for a moment before sliding in. Both of your groaned out a 'fuck' in unison, holding onto each other as you got used to the stretch.

"Ready?" "Ready."

His hips start to move, slow, setting the pace before quickening. Hips slamming into yours, balls tight and firm. slapping against the fat of your ass. His cock head nudged against your cervix, kissing it gently as you shuddered.

The headboard slammed against the wall, you knew your neighboring guests knew exactly what was going on- if not evident from your loud incessant moaning and drunken babbling.

He moaned deeply in your ear, heavy hands groping at anywhere he could reach. Kissing and exploring in reference as he took you. Hitching and shuddering as his thighs tremble.

"Oh you whore, what you do to me is heaven itself." His smooth words turn to whines and whimpers, going faster and faster, desperate to reach that edge.

"Fuck...M'not gonna last long." You grind against him, slick coating his curly white pubic hair, shining in the low lamp light of the hotel room.

He can barely hear you over his ringing ears, eyes rolling back as he sinks himself in you, cum filling up his condom. Gushes of slick covering the rubber, coating his stomach.

He stays there for a moment, softening inside of you before pulling out. Huffing for air. You were worse for wear, on the brink of sleep. Muscles felt like jello, bones heavy in your body. Eyes barely able to stay open.

"goodnight." He whispered, kissing your forehead.

When you woke up the next morning he was gone. The only thing left of him was the Hickies on your skin and the ache in your cunt.

[howlingday]

Nora: (Koala Faunus) Um, excuse me, sir, but when is my order going to be out?

Ren: (Looks at her full bowl) Did you want to order something else?

Nora: No, no, just waiting on my salad. It's just been 20 minutes since I ordered it.

Ren: Wh- It's sitting right in front of you.

Nora: Heh, I think I know when there's food right in front of me.

Ren: ...Wait. Here it comes now. (Puts stick in bowl)

Nora: Ohohoho~! (Claps)

Nora: (Stick falls out) Eh... Eh..!

EEEEEEEEEEEH!

Fun Fact! Koalas live on a diet entirely of eucalyptus leaves. These leaves are potently toxic to the point that it is unsafe for koala cubs to eat normally, requiring the mother to consume and digest her meal first, then the baby can eat the post-digestion mush. Koalas in veterinary recover are given an addictive eucalyptus milk that they become so dependent on that they will injure themselves upon release to get more of it. Worse yet, koalas will only eat eucalyptus if they recognize it on a branch.

[tophatandboots]

Eeeeeeeeeeeh (unnecessarily high pitched due to frustration) I really don't like mending buttonholes! It is dull and fiddly and gives me eye strain!!

But I would hate not being able to wear my favourite coat much more, and they've worn away to weirdly shaped raggedy fraying holes.

[sprunkimortality]

[Of course, a few seconds later, Simon notices and sees the box on the ground, he's not frickin' blind, dude.]

"Eeeeeeeeeeeh! A present?! With my name on it?! Thank you-thank you-thank you!" [Simon squeals, he's over the moon right now, he bounces and jitters up-and-down on the spot] "To answer your questions; Yeah, I ate dirt (sarcasm), and I used my hairspray 30 minutes ago (also sarcasm, but it did happen)." "Anyway--

[Of course, Pandi's being sarcastic for the third time about him being Sherlock Holmes (duh), but that's not important. New nickname given (hopefully will upset him somewhat): Sour-face! Get it? Lemon? Sour? You get it.]

"Now, wanna guess what's inside? No peeking...." ~~~ ooc: first time editing a drawing (1st one)! I hope xr not upset!

(it's alr! also x use normal you/your/yourself prns ^^ /nm)

[He seems to already be anticipating it, rubbing his paws together excitedly. His antennae seem to wiggle, too.]

Simon: "Is it a toy? Or a new plushie? Oh- Or maybe it's a treat! I'd really like that, that's for sure!"

[teddybeartoji]

HERE'S MITORU AS THE PRINCE AND THE KNIGHT FROM "IHTCTAOT"🌻🌸🌼🌳☀👑🤺

+ link ; we're beautiful and we're hurt and we're in love<3

+ link ; another version of us:333 (i wish i could've put some blood on us too smhh)

+ link ; AND COMFY LOVERSS!!! EEEEEEEEEEEHE'S SOOOCUTEEE!!!!!!!! HE'S MY BABYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!