#Donald Chump sucks | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

preston-t-umber · 2 months ago

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Brazen, you never say what it is exactly that you think Democrats are being shitty to their own supporters about. (The existence of feminism is not the responsibility of any political party, and that's the thing you seem most mad about.) For that matter, I am unclear as to how that directly connects to losing elections: one of the downsides of being a partisan is that my political party knows I'm basically locked-in. I can resent that fact, can decide to sit out a race if it's not important enough or I don't see enough daylight between candidates, but what you're implying - that Democrats could win in a walk if they were better to their supporters - seems to be just as much a fantasy as anything you are rallying against.

And I won't sit out, because, like you say, Donald Trump was a historically bad US President. The Democrats can afford to alienate me on any number of issues. That sucks, but - well, you're on the center/lib side of things, right? This is exactly what folks on the other fringe of the coalition feel all the time too. One of the reasons Trumpism has succeeded, incidentally, is that it is indeed incoherent: while folks on the Left fringe are constantly tearing the Democrats down for being liberal sellouts and imperialism this and colonialism that; folks on the center fringe are also constantly tearing the Democrats down for (take your pick). The Democrats get to pay the "sane party tax" where everyone wants to talk about all the difficult contradictions that come with being a governing party in superpower, while Trump correctly figured out (or lucked into guessing) that is a chump's game.

I don't think Democrats, or any party, are entitled to votes: but I feel like you've taken your whole anti-woke thing and assumed nobody is an actual bigot, which is just not true. Describing people who seem to be motivated by racial or gender or whatever animus - and I have personally met people like this - as bigots is not claiming to be entitled to support, it is simply a recognition that they are not likely to be gettable; and further unlikely to be worth getting. Your post assumes that only Democrats have agency. It's true that Democrats only have agency over themselves, but they are not the only actors in this system.

You talk about the hatred of Hillary purely as a function of *her* and ignore that she was being negatively defined in the media for over twenty years before her eventual 2016 loss. Despite this, she got more votes than the other guy! It's weird to describe someone who, to my knowledge, has never got fewer votes than any of her opponents (the 2008 primary saw Obama get more delegates, but not necessarily more votes) as a "really, really bad politician". The Democrats are probably the most successful center-left political party in the world, but everyone and their mother knows they'd never lose again if only they'd just do (My Policy Preferences Here)

They know they're authoritarian, and they're proud.

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drkineildwicks · 4 years ago

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Hello!

This is your friendly reminder that a brain-dead misogynistic racist pig and a baby-killing socialist are NOT a good substitute for President Trump.

This is your friendly reminder that the brain-dead misogynistic racist pig at his best is miles worst than President Trump at his worst.

This is your friendly reminder that the brain-dead misogynistic racist pig is in the pocket of Communist China, who gave the world COVID-19.

This is your friendly reminder that the Dems wanted to change the way mail-in voting worked TWO YEARS AGO. BEFORE COVID-19.

This is your friendly reminder that the 2020 election was rigged, that it was a huge cheating scandal that YOU ALL don’t want to see, you want to plug your ears screaming LA-LA-LA-LA because OBVIOUSLY the brain-dead misogynistic racist pig is SO MUCH BETTER than President Trump.

Notwithstanding that the brain-dead misogynistic racist pig is going to be dead in a year, and the baby-killing socialist who couldn’t even get A FULL PERCENT DURING THE PRIMARIES is going to be “in charge.”

I use quotation marks because again, those piles of cold vomit are not, will not, and will never be my president.

“Oh you should just suck it up and accept the results!”

1) I will never accept the results of such an obvious cheating scandal

2) You all never accepted Donald J. Trump as President of the United States

SEE HOW YOU LIKE THE SALT SENT BACK TO YOU, CHUMPS

#never biden #not my president #biden and harris are piles of cold vomit and that's the nicest I can put it

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surflove808 · 6 years ago

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On Destiel and endgame hysteria

Sometimes I get fired up about some of the BS I see in this fandom and this is one of those moments. This post will be a layercake of sentimentality, disappointment, anger and maybe a wee bit (a lot) of profanity. So, you know. Back on my bullshit.

The show that we love, love to hate or hate to love, for better or worse, will see it's final curtain call at the S15 finale. You don't need me to tell you how impactful it's been and how much it means to so many people for a variety of reasons that extend well beyond it's entertainment value. All it takes is one scroll through social media to get a sampling of the reach of this little-show-that-could and by extension (and because of) it's cast, to see that it's beloved by so many. And it deserves the praise, and the end deserves to be lamented - but like TFW has said over and over, and to paraphrase Frank Sinatra, they're doing it their way. For that? I'm happy.

The show has been described as a "juggernaut" and an "institution", and it is. We all know the themes: Finding *your* family, struggle, perseverance, dedication, making mistakes and not always learning from them (but trying), acceptance, the beauty in humanity even when all hope seems lost, redemption, and love... to name the big ones. Now about Love. "Love" is not threatening to burn down houses if your ship isn't made canon. "Acceptance" isn't threatening the cast, crew, producers and network with lawsuits if your ship isn't made endgame. I saw a few posts like that today that had a very disappointing number of likes and reblogs and I'm kinda furious, to be honest. You fucking twits.

As someone who enjoys the show, and respects the determination, sacrifice, hard work, creativity, and yes - Love - that has been poured into this endeavor, I don't think I'm alone when I say - JUST. STOP. You whining, tantrum throwing, self-important, "wouldn't catch a social cue if it had a $100 bill attached to it and was tossed to you from 3 feet away", obnoxious, divisive children.

Accept what the cast, the writers and Eric Freaking Kripke have told you? No... can't do that. Must hop from one lily pad of delusion to the next and have the gall to be self righteous about it. And then pat yourselves on the back for being alternately clever, threatening and obtuse. You're like the Donald Trumps of the SPN fandom. You're not disliked because of your ship. You're disliked because of your personalities. Let that sink in. No one is marginalizing you. You chose to do this to yourselves AND your beloved ship via your words and actions. You sunk your own battleship and now you’re pissed.

I don't affiliate myself with any ship or the other factions of this fandom.... I don't get it. I'm just a fan. A fan of the story, the acting, the tragedy, the comedy, the characters and the character of the actors involved. I don't know what a good "fan" is... don't care. But I know what a bad one is. A bad one thinks that they can take ownership of someone else's art just because they've "invested" in it.

And I apply it to my own life in this way - Here I am doing my thing, putting my creativity out into the world... and what I create matters to me. Every little bit. I throw myself into the things I'm passionate about. And not everyone is going to be thrilled with what I produce. Some people will never see what I put out there, but word travels fast when you genuinely care about your craft. I do what I do because it drives me, and always has. And I do my best to stay true to MY story. And the thought of someone trying to insert themselves into my story because they think they know my creations better than I do, makes me want to punch throats.

And the thought of a group of people actually threatening me and the people I collaborate with because I'm not making their fantasy a reality?? Hey - get fucked sideways without lube, and throw some sand in there for extra discomfort.

I want you (and you know who you are) to have some accountability. Please tell me in what scenario is your behavior warranted or appropriate. Feel free to DM me. I won't "out" you, and I'll never be abusive - I just need to know why. (bullet pointing this because... reading comprehension)

1. WHY is Destiel is the only representation you'll accept.

2. WHY do you think it's funny or "OK" to harass the creatives on this show constantly when you have absolutely no right to their story?

3. WHY do you think that pushing something so hard will get you what you want?

4, And lastly.... WHY is this so important to you?

Can you possibly survive if Destiel isn't made canon? Do you have other hobbies and interests that can fill your time? Because some of ya'll are acting like this is the Be All End All of your existence and I'm here to tell you - it's really not. If it DOES happen, it will be at the discretion of the showrunner and creatives, and I promise you it won’t be because they caved to the small, yet omnipresent faction of Destiehellers that have annoyed the ever-living fuck out of everyone attached to this show. It’ll be on their terms.

The tantrum strategy stops working after age 4, usually....it just seems some of you are late getting the memo. Thanks to your folks. Well done.

Try to appreciate the show for what it is and always has been. If your expectations are unreasonable and are buoyed by years of manips, misquotes and over-analyzation of brief "moments" between ANY characters, and you feel emotional enough about it to behave badly - it's time for a factory reset. This show has never mislead you - you’ve bought into delusion and over-analysis and straight-up fiction pimped to you by fellow “fans” probably before you even watched your first episode. It’s the weirdest thing I’ve seen. And I’ve seen some shit.

If you’re going to be angry... be angry at your friendly neighborhood Destiel dealer. They chumped you to get more *buy* for their *supply*. Them’s the facts.

That being said.... Can We Just Appreciate The Final Moments That This Amazing Cast And Crew Are Going To Give Us (and you know they will), And Let It The Fuck GO?

You're welcome to block me (you probably should). But before you do that, could you let this sink in a bit? And if you see a fellow shipper being an entitled douche - maybe hold yourself to a higher standard than they do themselves and don't perpetuate it/like/reblog it? Because this behavior is well and truly a shitty way to treat the legacy of this groundbreaking show, and all those that are responsible for bringing it to life.

In other words....Behave. And have some goddamn dignity.

I’m not sure if I’m doing this right, but my response was so long. Eh...whatever. @jessiegail I understand, and please allow me to elaborate. When I was scrolling through the Jensen tags (because the Dean and SPN tags have been overrun by a lot of people with zero respect for the character/show canon, so I stay away anymore. That in and of itself should tell you something)... I was also sharing in the moment, and the news and wanted to see some SPN love and positivity. What I ran into almost immediately was, and I quote: "If they don't make destiel cannon (sic) for the series finale, I'll set their houses on fire. You've been warned." 87 people agreed with @moosewncstr on this sentiment. Now... if it was one shitty person and people steered clear of any affiliation with them for threatening arson because they're completely off their fucking rocker.... that would be easy to ignore. But 87 people?? That’s really, really bad. What I'm seeing and have been seeing, is a hive-mind mentality that doesn't care for acceptance. Doesn't care if it’s abusive. Doesn't care if someone gets their “feelings” hurt. And they absolutely Do Not Care if what they say incites the potential reality of violence, as long as they can force their ship down the throats of as many people as possible and Make It Canon.

And by hive-mind, I mean - NO ONE in the Destiel camp seems to have the degree of autonomy (AKA: Balls) required to rein in the bad apples in their bunch. They either agree or stay silent. So, because you can’t self-regulate, people like me with no concern or desire for your approval have to come in and tell you to knock your shit off. You won’t. But I feel better. And maybe others will feel more comfortable to express their disapproval when shit like this rears its ugly head. Anyone who would think threats (just a joke...hahaha), are acceptable, and those who are in agreement can suck it. And i will not roll over and sing kumbaya with anyone who thinks this is ok. I'm generally careful with the headers and lead-in paragraphs to posts that are potentially inflammatory. A courtesy that is not extended by your brethren. You had ample warning that this post would not be kind to asshole shippers. I don’t think you are one of those people - but, if you’re defending this behavior, I can’t really empathize with you. I also don’t want you to feel targeted. This isn’t about YOU. This is about endemic behavior that has become so toxic, it pretty much can’t be undone. As for paying anything forward, I do not owe people who act like this the time of day, much less a kind word. I have 2 choices: I can stand by and pretend I don't see these things and block, block, block so that I can stay in my bubble. Or, I can take my own little stand on my own little blog and address genuinely disturbing behavior using language of my choice. What I will never do is threaten or abuse any individuals who question my logic. Downside is... you'll get a very long winded explanation. Go, be happy. Enjoy your ship. No one is telling you not to. I'm telling you right now, though - I can't and won't tolerate the bad apples. Best to block me if you're sensitive to the way I word my posts, but understand - I'm not promoting hate or abusive behavior - I'm fighting it. And I will continue to do so as long as I'm on this dumpster fire of a website, because I love this show and I believe all of the creative's, crew and fans deserve some fucking respect.

#SPN Family #dean winchester #Sam Winchester #castiel #Destiel #destiehellers #supernatural #jensen ackles #jared padalecki #misha collins

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writtenconsiderations · 5 years ago

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Joan Rivers and her Heavenly Review (A Poem by Reza Ghahremanzadeh)

Each year each soul must sit with God,

A Heavenly Review,

Joan was late again this year,

And God began to stew.

Her entrance was the same as well:

Flashy, brash and loud.

She placed her golden Gucci bag

Upon the fluffy cloud.

“Joan, you're late again,” said God.

“It's quarter past eleven!

Now, have you any updates

Regarding my great Heaven?”

“Well, as for being late,” said Joan,

“I do not give two fucks!

And here's a major update, dear:

The Botox up here sucks!”

“Ms Rivers, I am truly shocked,

I must state my objection,

Nothing I make sucks, okay?

I only make perfection.”

“Only perfection? Can we talk?

You must think I'm a chump!

What about the Elephant Man?!

What about Donald Trump?!”

“Well, Ms Rivers, I think we're done,

But let me make this clear,

I want to see a different Joan

When you come back next year.”

“Here's a tip,” Joan said to him,

“Shave and buy a vest,

'Cause if you were on “Fashion Police”,

My dear, you'd be Worst Dressed!”

#Poetry #Submission #submission

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lynxgriffin · 6 years ago

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Here Comes The Sun

It’s already time for more KH3 commentary! Under the cut for anyone who wants to avoid spoilers!

All right! It’s time to move on down to Tangledtown, it looks like!

There were some terrible gummi ship messes in the way, let’s see if I can manage to get past them

Still suck at gummi missions but at least I can survive them after like…a try or two

And heck yeah we’re off to Tangledtown!! I mean Corona

Honestly the ultimate video game challenge will be rendering this super long hair

Sora: Why are we here? Who cares, it’s pretty!!

OMG Flynn

Once again, beautiful music here! And yaaay learned Aero!

Sora you giant dingleberry

Ugh this world is so dang pretty

Pretty much repeats of the movie so far

Flynn: I’m thinking exposition to myself!

You’re not quite nailing The Smoulder there, Flynn

There’s eel in this here river!

Ugh I found a lucky emblem but I can’t find a good spot to photograph it from!

Sora: First time outdoors?? Yikes…that’s dark

It’s okay Rapunzel, you got the order right, everything’s fine

That’s the fluffiest Heartless in existence

Okay heck yeah that was a fun battle type deal!

HIIIIII MAR MAR

Did Norted Marluxia just Mar Mother Gothel? HOW MANY LAYERS DOES THIS GO

Dandelions! WE FOUND ALL OF AVA’S KIDS

I think my fav attraction flows so far are the carousel and rapids ride

We have obtained: BUNNY TREASURE

You can make Sora splash in the water sooob

Oh we had Heartless flowers and now Nobody flowers!

I like how everybody’s like “Flowers? SUSPICIOUS!!!”

Gotta say that Mar’s lesser Nobodies are pretty kickass, tho

HAS-BEENS

HERE COMES THE SORA SASS

Aww Mar doesn’t want to remember getting his ass handed to him —I’m not counting data battles argh—

Well Mar that’s…not quite true honestly

Mar: And when I say “use the Keyblade to keep her safe” I mean “LOCK HER IN THE TOWER HURR HURR”

Oooh now getting into the spooky forest

Goofy: Well let’s use proper names for the terrible villain!

Sora: Well excuuuuuuuse me, evil stepmother

CALL YOUR MOM, SORA

Oh hey we finally found Maximus!

WE HAVE HORSEY SEAL OF APPROVAL

the flap-flaps are back!!

Pfff this Heartless monkey all like “EAT MY ASS, I HAVE A SIEGE TOWER”

Oh gosh this Heartless

SUPERJUMP??

I must give Rapunzel this halo of birds

I gotta agree, I think this is the prettiest world so far

I’M TAKIN ALL YOUR FRESH FRUIT AND VEGETABLES NOW

Don’t mind me, just swimming in your water digging for shellfish

WTF the dancing part was so ridiculously cute I can’t

Funny I don’t remember them actually having the satchel at this point?

Sora: EXCUSE U FOR NOT APPRECIATING THIS MOMENT

Must’ve told her that his name was Eugene while Sora and co were out

LMAO Marmar that was the most flat delivery of that line

LOL sure Mother Gothel just beat those giant Nobodies to death with a stick

SHE DISCOVERED THE POWER OF STICKBLADE

Damn they pulling up the chess metaphor again

No one told the other Princesses that their job was finished!

Oh wow so apparently Mar can just! Do that??

I do love that moment with the sun symbol tho

Mother Gothel: I’m extra the bad guy now because of the dark darkness smoke

Oh geez they’ve been there all night

He was awakened by the kiss of true horse

Maximus: I CAN CARRY FOUR PEOPLE IT’S FINE

STABB’D

Sora: Just let me get there I’ve got a cure spell!

AND THIS WHOLE SCENE

Marluxia, please, put any emotions at all into your voice

Oh now THAT’S a freaky-ass Heartless, nice nice

That was a pretty kickass boss battle, gotta say

Sora: WTF people can’t actually die that’s not allowed!

Sora: Told you sooooo

WHELP WE DID IT WE PLAYED THE MOVIE

Donald: “Rapunzel’s the tough one actually” HE’S NOT WRONG

Sora: EXCUSE U if I matchmake THEN I GET IN ON THE SECRETS

So yay! Finished that world! Will have to give this Keyblade a try, but I do really like the Toy Story one

Pete: WE KEEP GETTING SHAFTED

It’s Etch-A-Sketch’d

Please please let Maleficent and Pete end up being the monkey wrench in the Organization’s whole plan just because no one thought to notice what they were doing

Let Aeleus have a line!!

Oh well this looks ominous

HI SAIX

Even: Humanity is for CHUMPS

Vexen: Friendship ended with Basic Decency, GETTING NORTED is my new BFF

Oooh oh oh new worlds to choose from!!

Looks like the next spot we’re going is MONSTERS INC, YAAAY I’M EXCITE

But I’ll talk about that in the next commentary post, so this is already getting a bit long!

More very soon!!

#kh3 spoilers #kingdom hearts spoilers #lynx plays kh3

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fountainpenguin · 6 years ago

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Muse-Ic

I’ve had some people asking me lately about music and whether I listen to anything in particular when gearing up to write certain characters. I never listen to music while I actually write, but sometimes I’ll pull up songs in the morning and then carry them with me throughout the day while I plan things out.

So, here are some little character playlists for you guys, including some songs I’ve shared before and others I haven’t. Since the 130 Prompts are now on hiatus for the next year, it feels like a good time to share this.

You can find the entire 100-song playlist on YouTube HERE.

Timmy

“Proud of Your Boy” - Deleted Aladdin song / Part of the musical

“Welcome to My Life” - Simple Plan

“What the Heck I Gotta Do” - 21 Chump Street

“Let Me Be Surprised” - All Dogs Go to Heaven

“Nothing” - A Chorus Line

Cosmo

“Leading Man” - Will Jay

“Why Don’t You Love Me?” - Hot Chelle Rae

“Rude” - Magic!

“Make ‘Em Laugh” - Donald O’Conner

“Nobody Else But You” - A Goofy Movie

Wanda

“Who Are You?” - Fifth Harmony

“Everything You Want” - Vertical Horizon

“I Do Adore” - Mindy Gledhill

“Upside Down” - The A-Teens

“Mine” - Taylor Swift

Chloe

“The Story of Us” - Taylor Swift

“Dreams to Dreams” - An American Tail: Fievel Goes West

“Reflection” - Mulan

“Halfway Around the World” - The A-Teens

“A Guy That I’d Kinda Be Into” - Be More Chill

Crocker

“Almost” - Bowling For Soup

“Babel” - Mumford and Sons

“Unwell” - Matchbox 20

“Don’t Fall In Love” - Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas

“My Nemesis” - Phineas and Ferb

Kevin

“Blood Red Summer” - Coheed and Cambria

“Up the Stair” - 101 Dalmatians Animated Storybook

“Not One of Us” - The Lion King 2

“Get Off My Back” - Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron

“Who You Really Are” - Balto 2

Remy

“The Mine Song” - LazyTown (Okay, this one was a gimme)

“Wolf” - First Aid Kit

“Perfect” - Simple Plan

“Regret Message” - (Vocaloid)

“Never Been In Love” - Will Jay

Juandissimo

“Closer to Her” - Big Fish

“Say You Like Me” - We The Kings

“Fairytale” - Alexander Ryback

“The Man Who Can’t Be Moved” - The Script

“Version of Love” - Will Jay

Head Pixie

“Grow Up” - Simple Plan

“Cowboy Cassanova” - Carrie Underwood

“Wonderful” - Wicked

“Oh No” - Marina and the Diamonds

“Chomp and Munch” - The Brave Little Toaster: Great Animal Rescue

Sanderson

“Thank You For the Music” - Abba

“The Company Way” - How to Succeed In Business Without Really Trying

“Loser of the Year” - Simple Plan

“I’d Lie” - Taylor Swift

“Servant of Evil” - (Vocaloid)

Anti-Cosmo

“Take Me to Church” - Hozier

"Anything For You” - Ludo

“A Meticulous Analysis of History” - Pinky and The Brain

“Mr. Policeman” - Brad Paisley

“Bad Apple” - (Vocaloid)

Anti-Wanda

“Broken Glass” - Robbie Shapiro

“Takes One to Know One” - Maria Mena

“The Wolf That Fell In Love With Little Red Riding Hood” - (Vocaloid)

“Criminal” - Britney Spears

“Devil’s Backbone” - The Civil Wars

Poof

“Puff the Magic Dragon” - Peter, Paul, and Mary

“Popular” - Wicked

“18 Till I Die” - Bryan Adams

“Too Close” - Alex Clare

“Wildfire” - (Vocaloid)

Goldie

“Dear Future Husband” - Meghan Trainor

“Good Girls” - 5 Seconds of Summer

“Ex’s and Oh’s” - Elle King

“Self-Fulfilling Prophecy” - Maria Mena

“Boyfriend Kisser” - Total Drama World Tour

Foop

“Duality” - Set It Off

“Marry You” - Bruno Mars

“Led You On” - Noel Gourdin

“Evelyn, Evelyn” - Stars

“This Is How We Will End It” - Total Drama World Tour

Hiccup

“If I Didn’t Have You” - Quest for Camelot

“Shut Up and Kiss Me” - Orianthi

“The Portrait of Pirate F” - (Vocaloid)

“Battles” - Hudson Taylor

“Karma” - (Vocaloid)

Anti-Marigold

“Complicated” - Avril Lavigne

“Does He Love You?” - Rilo Kiley

“King of Anything” - Sara Bareilles

“Tell Me Lies” - Cats Don’t Dance

“My Life Would Suck Without You” - Kelly Clarkson

Cavatina

“The City’s Yours” - Annie (2014)

“It’s a B-Movie” - The Brave Little Toaster

“The Logical Song” - Supertramp

“Facade” - Jekyll & Hyde

“I’m Gonna Make It” - Total Drama World Tour

Happy Peppy Gary

“Shut Up and Dance” - Walk the Moon

“My Happy Ending” - Avril Lavigne

“Sad Song” - We the Kings

“Egoselfish” - (Vocaloid)

“My Songs Know What You Did In the Dark” - Fall Out Boy

Happy Peppy Betty

“Human” - Christina Perri

“Just a Friend to You” - Meghan Trainor

“What’s Wrong With Me?” - Singin’ In the Rain

“He Likes Boys” - Simone Battle

“Once Upon a December” - Anastasia

These are actually pretty dead-on if I do say so myself. Study them with heavy consideration if you wish. You think you know where these plot arcs are going, but you do NOT! ... Maybe.

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mandareeboo · 6 years ago

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Unfinished Work #18

Another one set after The Other Bin of Scrooge McDuck! It was basically gonna be one big Louie care-fest after how he got treated by his bros in the episode.

Louie takes getting curb-stomped by a herd of angry bigfoots with as much humor as he can manage. It sucks, it hurts, he cries- but y'know what? He still wins. He got the mansion. Those chumps gotta wipe with leaves and bark.

The youngest triplet yanks his hoodie up as he heads up the walk to the house, a plan in one hand and irritation in the other. Louie knows he can get some serious pity points with the black eye and swollen lip (and those are the nicer wounds), but it'd be in his best interest to wipe the blood off before he goes wailing to Uncle Donald. Dried blood is annoying.

He doesn't notice Webby. In a weird way, he's used to not noticing Webby. She's got top billings in the mansion; knows every nook, every cranny, every weird parkour angle she can and will take to get to places. So while he's surprised by her tugging the back of his hood back, he's not surprised surprised.

Webby lets out a quiet gasp at his face. "Did someone torture you?"

Louie breathes out his nose, gathering himself, then turns and nonchalantly shrugs. "Nah. Fell down some stairs."

She takes a step forward. "Who did this? I'll murder them!"

He held his hands up. "Relax, Webby. Murder isn't necessary. Also, it's incredibly illegal, and I ain't about the jail life."

#Unfinished Work #Ducktales 2017 #Louie Duck #Webby Vanderquack

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dragoni · 7 years ago

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There can never be too much mockery of Dear Leader #InternationalJoke

Adolf Twitler

Agent Orange

The Angry Creamsicle

Barbecued Brutus

Benedict Donald

Boss Tweet

Bratman

Cheeto Benito

Cheeto-In-Chief

The Combover Con Artist

Comrade Cheetolino

Creep Throat

Crown Prince of Politwits

Darth Hater

Donald Chump

Donnie Bratso

Donnie TicTac

Draft Dodger Don

Dumbelldore

The Fanta Fascist

The Fraud of Fifth Avenue

Fuckface Von Clownstick

Genghis Can’t

The Golden Wrecking Ball

The Great White Dope

Hair Furher

The Human Tanning Bed Warning Label

The Infuriator

Last Of The Mango Mohawkans

Little Lady Fingers

King Leer

The Lone DeRanger

The Lyin King

Macho McGrump

Mango Mussolini

President Gold Man Sucks

President If-Urine-You’re-In

President Rancid Velveeta

Prima Donald

Pudgy McTrumpcake

Putin’s Papaya-Flavored Pawn

Short-Fingered Vulgarian

Sir Sissypants

The Talking Yam

Tangerine Tornado

Tie-Coon

Trumplethinskin

Trumpty Dumpty

Vanilla ISIS

The White Pride Piper

#trump #donald trump #45 #45th president #trump nicknames #mocking trump #mockery #american embarrassment #trump laughingstock #international joke

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titheguerrero · 7 years ago

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More Dander Rising: Ditto to Dr. Poses

Let me second the emotion now recently and repeatedly voiced by Dr. Poses in these pages. It's getting real hard to separate the health policy and malfeasance fecaliths from the general Washington Scheißsturm raining down on us. We all feel pretty much buffeted non-stop, like (whomp!) badminton shuttlecocks in the corruption game the prevaricator-in-chief seems happily destined to carry on forever. Or at least until some better angels out there in America rise up to put an end to it. Because it's pretty obvious the party hacks clearly aren't going to. They're way too busy (padre you're fired! padre you're unfired!) doing other important stuff. And avoiding the wrath (why invite trouble?) of the prevaricator-in-chief. Maybe tweets are effective covering fire. Maybe it's not a kakistocracy we live in so much as a tweetocracy. In fact it's also getting pretty easy to find the links between the micro- and the macro-misdeeds in today's kakistocracy. I want to talk about two of those today. Both stem from recent months' events in the game of musical chairs at two of the most cost- and problem-ridden departments overseen by our executive branch. Of course, as the reader likely already surmised, these are health and human services and veterans' affairs. Dr. Poses has in fact just posted on the latter, given the zany events in the previously barely-known White House Medical Unit. (In fact, in discussing what happens with the current administration Dr. P has hit upon an essential mechanism liking the macro and the micro: "inbound revolving door" plants from the White House directed to administrations such as HHS and VA. Where a guy with some expertise in any given position may show questionable judgment in comporting himself--yes we're always talking about men these days--all too soon he's offed by the political hacks appointed to "help" him. This makes for great press but poor government. But since when is anything like good government even the point? Hacks make hay while the sun shines. They're out to satisfy their rich donors like the Kochs and Mercers. Some hacks get to stay in place if they're somnolent enough. I mean you, Carson. Others, including folks who're not hacks like David Shulkin at the VA, are out on their tushies before press or good-government critics get to prove much of anything.) Let's take these two agencies in turn. The VA. First there was David Shulkin. I've written about him before (e.g. here and here), as has Dr. Poses. Not much more to say here about the guy who came in with good intentions, inaugurated some important positive changes in information technology and elsewhere in a badly-battered organization, then made what might at worst be characterized as some slightly sloppy mistakes in his record-keeping and travel-planning while on official business. Then the jackals swooped and out he went. Next up: Ronny Jackson, ER doctor, erstwhile head of the White House Medical Unit and Navy frat-boy par excellence. Ronny was to be Shulkin's replacement, until his boss rewarded his sucking up with a now-standard distancing maneuver. Which might be described as "stir up a fuss, you go under the bus." Jackson, AKA "Dr. Feelgood" (ibid. and here), will never be VA Secretary now, or get his second admiral's star. (Or whatever it is that admirals get.) His unit's curiously isolated place in the hierarchy allowed him allegedly to abuse his reports, but at the same time seemingly left him, his boss, and anyone who's supposed to vet cabinet-level appointees, blind-sided about what it takes to run a large health care organization. Oh, wait, they actually started with someone who had what it takes. But none of this is any longer about good government or effectiveness or expertise. It's about ideology, or ideology as refracted through donors' eyes. And Jackson's boss, as his latest hapless subaltern edges closer to the undercarriage of the bus, says "[t]hey’re trying to destroy a man," Ronny's such a good guy--just look what he said about my health, my hands are clean, it's all fake fake fake. Fake news. Actually, classic gaslighting. Now the boss is going after Ronny's tormentor, Montana Sen. Tester. But my friends in Montana tell me Tester's got not so much to worry about. Montanans are a cussedly independent lot, They don't take too kindly to these bad-mouthing bad boys from out of swamp over there in Dee-Cee. So who's next in the cavalcade of stars for the truly humongous VA bureaucracy and its leadership? One name being bruited about is that of Jeff Miller, a lobbyist who once as a congressman chaired the House Committee on Veterans' Affairs. But according to Newsweek, Miller's real claim to fame is his work lobbying for insider trading hedge funder and Very Happy Guy Steven A. Cohen. Turns out Cohen is a major funder for the privatized health care that Shulkin quite rightly opposed. (See ibid. in Newsweek, and here.) Super-tight in with this crowd are also the Koch Brothers, the Daddies Warbuck for Concerned Veterans for America. CVA is a remarkable organization. It's lofty aims "to preserve the freedom & prosperity we & our families fought & sacrificed to defend" (where'd they find this copywriter?) include project such as "VA Fail." VA Fail is a "tracker" to which you can actually subscribe in order to follow each and every one of this department's "missteps, mismanagement and misguidance." A set-up to do away with an essential and in many ways still-vital branch of government. One that really needs help to change some dysfunctional internal systems, but still really helps people at reasonable cost. Right now I'm a long, long way from Washington. I'm in a place where government is equally corrupt and dufus-like. But at least the people are nice to each other and hip to their government's misdeeds. Still, it seems these democracies are having a really hard time right about now. Many have lost faith in their own ability to impact the bizarre bull-in-a-china-shop behavior of their leaders. Truth is, veterans want an effective and separate VA health system. I know, I worked there. The K-Stone Cops are giving them anything but. Profit motive über alles. An awful lot of members of "the Base" are veterans. Will they notice this scam? Health and Human Services. First there was Tom Price, who was soon out of that job because a minor corruption scandal far eclipsed by his own legal antics. Antics that were perfectly legal but perfectly dangerous, the attempt to make good on campaign promises to do in HHS and the Affordable Care Act. While Secretary, Georgia orthopedist and anti-Medicare activist Price approached the ACA the way he had most issues once arrived in Congress: undermine, undermine, undermine. Look at him now. While Secretary, the Post tells us, he was all

"The individual mandate is one of those things that is actually driving up the cost for the American people in terms of coverage” ... on ABC’s “This Week” last summer. So, what we’re trying to do is make it so that Obamacare is no longer harming the patients of this land — no longer driving up costs, no longer making it so that they’ve got coverage but no care.”

But in a preternatural paroxysm of honesty just a week ago, on May Day, Price told a health conference just the opposite. It was the Congress that knew that the lack of the mandate would drive up the cost of insurance. But ideology and the donors said do it, so with his help they did it anyway. Along with any number of other measures to try and deep-six Obamacare. Of course they failed in spite of themselves--Obamacare is hanging in there. But it's no thanks to the guy whose job it was to make it work. He did everything he could to make it not work. Following Price we got a drug company executive, Alex Azar. He's actually done a few good things in his short time over at HHS. I've known a lot of drug company executives, as well as a lot of right wing doctors. The former are often a lot less ideological and a lot more practical than the latter. I'm actually in conversation with one of the most successful members of the latter group--a widely recognizable pair of names, corporation and leader alike--and when it comes to steps that the left questions, such as lobbying, the responses are remarkably forthright and lacking in hysterical right wing cant. "We need to sell our product." Right wing doctors who go into politics have all sorts of extra axes to grind.So Azar sort of had a head start on Price. Thus the focus now shifts at least for the moment from insurance to drug prices, one of the bugabears both of Azar and his boss Donald Trump. At this year's World Health Congress, Azar teed up the trial balloon that floated around the campaign and still bears watching. Azar stated that "President Trump wants to go 'much further' to attack high drug prices," according to many sources including CNBC's Angelica LaVito. But what does this mean? Drug companies have recently upped their spending on both lobbying and campaign giving. This has caused heavy breathing in health policy circles--see here for example--but in my opinion is chump change. A doubling from spending in the low six figures to the mid six figures for activities that impact government drug-price awareness is, to me, just budget dust. The Big Nut is Medicare and active direct bargaining to get prices down. Will Azar be able to do the in-sell that gets his boss to come out swinging with the biggest weapon he has? The drug companies, when they spend the big bucks, are really playing a different game. There are so many players in the pharmaceutical sales-and-distribution space, most notably the separately powerful PBM (pharmacy benefits management) companies, that everyone's pushing on a wet noodle. The one really reliable weapon Azar and company have, if they're willing to use it, is Medicare spending. This one will be truly fascinating to watch. It will say a lot about whether the President wants truly to drain the swamp and hence really please those in his Base who need affordable meds. Or just refill that swamp in order to please the hacks with whom he's now surrounded himself.

TO PRESERVE THE FREEDOM &PROSPERITY WE & OUR FAMILIES FOUGHT & SACRIFICED TO DEFEND.

TO PRESERVE THE FREEDOM &PROSPERITY WE & OUR FAMILIES FOUGHT & SACRIFICED TO DEFEND

Article source:Health Care Renewal

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apsbicepstraining · 7 years ago

Text

Da Man Wit’ Da Money: 77 Hip-Hop Lyrics About Donald Trump

Donald Trump I cleared Forbes’ list this month!

Now I’m knocking like Jehovah; let me in now, let me in now Bill Gates, Donald Trump, let me in now

I’m so appalled Spalding ball, Baldin’ Donald Trump, takin’ dollars from y’all

So come on gettin’ lovely I’m gettin’ into the money The Donald Trump money

I buy vehicles wit straight cash, have convenes with Donald Trump Y’all meet wit Honda , no payments for 12 months

Going Donald Trump counts on the corner I made a million on that corner

Im bout to do a lyric with Bono Pocket Trump like I only impressed the lottery, lotto

Yo Ice, I did a concert in the White House And after that me and Donald Trump hung out

10.

I gotta say what’s up to Digital Underground and Humpty Hump Cause he makin’ more than Donald Trump

11.

Can I live? I make yo’ ass over the hump We tryna get money so we can be livin’ like Trump

12.

We can talk Trump talk, real estate, capitals, and bonds Or gangsta shit, my Rugers and Glocks in palm

13.

Trump change?( Chump change) Nah TRUMP change patnah not chump change

14.

The’ S’ in skypage certainly stands for sex Beeper’s goin off like Don Trump gets checks

15.

Suck a dick and lick an ass exactly to get a pump Fuck Black Caesar niggaz, announce me Black Trump

16.

I’m back with the funk, chump You crave funk, how many chunks? I went spunk I’m well-known like Donald Trump

17.

Warning you chump, psyche is out for lunch Given the dominance perforate, soon to be paid like Donald Trump

18.

He get apprehensive is seeking to startle I hit him with the pump Put more cash in my pockets than Donald Trump

19.

Got a business mind so if I lose the funk I’ll still be in the members of this house gettin’ paid like Trump

20.

Poisonous sting which thrashes up and act chumps Raise a heavy generator But yo, guess who’s the pitch-black Trump?

21.

You can boom shalock and move to the resounds I pump But I ain’t ceasing till I’m shitting on Donald Trump

22.

New Trump, brand new funk Keep the pocket full of California skunk

23.

Serena Williams, downtown unoccupied and Trump Who wanna slammed her rump, dunce, yes I fetch the pump

24.

Now I ain’t talkin bout no bullshit ass flippin z’s I’m talkin Trump type access, they comin off a mob of keys

25.

So all I’d wanna got the chamber stumped I’m smokin, make dough like Trump

26.

In hot pursuit of Donald Trump rap loot Produce what you feel with Navy Seal mic troops

27.

Im merely tryin to get rich like Trump The home run king is now in a slump, extend me a hunk

28.

The brand-new Don Trump is Bill Gates Not because his occupation, it’s’ cause we respect his cake

29.

Im the young Donald Trump, is yall listening me? Girls on the side path, yeah they cheerin me

30.

Niggas always expect to see us two together, stable The good duo they read since Trump and Marla Maple

31.

Doin’ it like Donald Trump I’m sendin’ this one to the women with body And all my hustlas with the grill front

32.

Teddy Riley, Michael Tyler, large-scale Trump thang Million dollars, sunny holler big bucks man

33.

Now they announce me Snoopy Trump I keep my heater open, cause I love to bust

34.

Throw my weight like Sherman Klump I gotta stand up my owned like Donald Trump

35.

I’m Donald Trump in a lily-white tee and lily-white ones The exchange is money nigga, you want some?

36.

Bill Gates, Donald Trump, them a require you In a the Pentium five them haggard wire you

37.

I’m Donald Trump, with raccoon hairdos I’m Lil Kim, so plastic , now it only really scares dudes

38.

Time to flip the labor move the block bump Boys from the hood announce me black Donald Trump

39.

I spend ludicrous money, private fowl money That Bill Gates, Donald Trump, Bloomberg money

40.

Resurrection of the real, time to get richer than Trump

41.

I’m lyin’ to Christ, put your fuckin’ sticker in a vice I’m like Trump in the Apprentice, merely fire at night

42.

You burnt mothafucka Donald Trump nigga I’m killing these niggas can’t fuck nigga

43.

Breathing off a Trump budget Fresh outa Bloomie’s with the Louie luggage

44.

Give me honour and fortune, me and Trump on golf courses With that being said, give me Tiger’s athletics endorsements

45.

And I’m gonna chopped this whole ki into a lotta lumps Next era you determine me I’ll have money like Donald Trump

46.

Homies on the blocking can say whatever they want I don’t wanna has become a trader, I wanna be a Trump

47.

The Apprentice but not Trump Im the nigga with Glocks and pumps

48.

1st of the month, Trump to the buyers Red toupe on the coupe you’ve been fired

49.

Get money like Donald Trump Double barrel on that pump

50.

Money buy the DIGITS I get Donald Trump callin’ me a fund wizard

51.

Richest nigga in my hood: announce me Donald Trump The form that count my coin while I inhale a blunt

52.

Take over the world when I’m on my Donald Trump shit Look at all this fund, ain’t that some shit?

53.

I’m tryna stuff em until I can’t fit no more I’m talking Donald Trump level I’m trying to get these dreamings off the ground All aboard for the shuttle

54.

Got enough, got enough Tryna’ get onto, til I’m on my Donald Trump, Donald Trump

55.

And we don’t stop my nigga I’m like Donald Trump nigga

56.

I started out transgressed, get rich, lost article then became it back Like Trump being up down up, play with cash

57.

I’m a good-looking rapper, I ain’t tryna stunt I’m a ardor my dampen like Donald Trump

58.

Hustle a palace, Donald trump 6 mil I got a 6th sense so known better 6 feel

59.

Walk up on you whiskey maskin’ punk And burn them kills just like I’m Donald Trump

6-.

Plottin’ on Donald Trump I was 15 years old when I hit that chopper

61.

You can hate, don’t frown, my nigga With Donald Trump in the stem, my nigga

62.

And Donald Trump, and Carlos Slim And call Obama, Oprah Winfrey then

63.

Hugo Boss, I only Donald Trump you Michael Kors sweater with cocaine on the garment Woke up in mansion but I grew up in apartment

64.

Trump Tower with Donald( Donald) I can’t drive a Honda( uh uh) Now I get options, you can detest me if you wanna

65.

No Donald Trump, Bill Gates or Bruce Wayne The only thing I had to my figure was a few dreams

66.

You makin’ patterns raise ya frost and Guinness And workin’ pussy that’s my type of fitness I’m countin’ fund like I’m Donald Trump

67.

Wit a pocket full of lint and a Big Meech letter And I’m fuck wat Donald Trump talk bout I like change when I convened Rosetta

68.

I’m fucked worse than Donald Trump On Lexapro in Mexico across from a Texaco in McDonald’s drunk

69.

Yeah thumbs up I’ve seen more punctures than a golf course on Donald Trump’s course

70.

Too much spinach to chew for niggas beefin ‘, So I’m out here trick or treatin ‘, can my niggas comprehend Bill Gates, Donald Trump , motherfucker let me in.

71.

Assassinate Trump like Im Zimmerman/ Now accept these terms as they came from Eminem

72.

Ah, my mention is Jibbs but they call me mighty Trump The kid down a live with an outerspace flow Stay brandished up, poking madden with a flow Jag chillin in the back with girls holla at a chump

73.

Ice Cube says you’re making more than Donald Trump So yo, go on and get your nose tied, Hump

74.

Cause ya boy’s in a slump I took her out of the jets The top floor of the Trump Had to hustle hard

75.

I’m on ridin’ humor my 12 -gauge pump Been a boss from the rush, croak getta like Trump

76.

Of a investigated off shotgun, hand on the pump Musty dead bodies and a catty bump, Trump

77.

Up like Donald Trump, chain moves like nunchucks She gon’ grind you up, twerk like she from Russia

The post Da Man Wit’ Da Money: 77 Hip-Hop Lyrics About Donald Trump appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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anthonybuddhawhite · 7 years ago

Photo

https://youtu.be/LunHybOKIjU ‪Eminem Rips Donald Trump In BET Hip Hop Awards Freestyle Cypher https://youtu.be/LunHybOKIjU via @YouTube‬🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 #fucktrump #fuckdonaldtrump #fuckracism #facts thank #repost (Eminem with you thank you for say something) Dear Mr President aka Hitler; I got a question for trump well maybe a few the first question is what the fuck is wrong with you If I could I would put a slug through your peep hole and you straight bitch for saying fuck Puerto Rico you can suck my Dick bitch and fuck what you say Truth is that you like kids anyway Fuck you wife fuck your life fuck your daughter but you probably did and ain't got nothing to say You orange face fuck if you go to hell I pray you make it fuck your supporters nothing you do can make America great again Why you fuckin with the Mexicans You be hittin off trannies. So chump like sexing men Resign you fuck. legalize marijuana’s national wide or listen to what we say soon latter warrior are coming out to play We had enough fucking with wrong Family. Mr. President aka Hitler. That for you memorize the words. Twitter this motherfucker.

#repost #facts #fucktrump #fuckracism #fuckdonaldtrump

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conservativeamericatoday · 7 years ago

Video

youtube

You just can't believe everything that liberal media says. Subscribe us now to get the REAL NEWS everyday. Click Here To Subscribe: https://goo.gl/Jak4Sa The Trumps made their way to France this week, marking the second international trip that they’ve taken in last 10 days. President Trump has been determined in his resolve to make America great again, and realizes the importance of mending the international relationships that Obama destroyed over the past 8 years. Predictably, liberals have been camped out and anxiously waiting for the moment that President Trump would “screw up” so they would have another reason to gripe about his presidency. But in their latest attempt to make Trump look like a chump, liberal media outlets have only embarrassed themselves on the world stage, in a major screw-up that will leave you completely astonished. CNN anchor Poppy Harlow was providing the live coverage of President Trump’s initial meeting with French President Emmanuel Macron on Tuesday, where the two men had planned to talk about the U.S.-France relationship and the role it plays in the fight against ISIS. As our nation’s colors were raised along side of France’s and our National Anthem played, Harlow then directed viewers to listen in, and that’s when she proved to the world just how anti-American she truly is.“Let’s just listen in to the French national anthem for just a moment,” she said, confusing “The Star Spangled Banner” for the French national anthem. Hilariously, the song went on for several verses where a CNN producer can be heard whispering in the background to inform Harlow of her error, after which she embarrassingly corrected herself. “The US — American national anthem I should say,” Harlow said. “Let’s listen.”It’s no wonder why CNN so vehemently despises President Trump, as he’s proving himself to be the most pro-American and patriotic president in recent history. But what’s appalling is just how anti American the anchors of CNN truly are, if they aren’t even able to recognize that the Star Spangled banner as an American song, not to mention the theme song for our country! Despite the liberal media’s negative coverage of Trump’s trip from the day he stepped into France, Trump has been kicking ass, setting aside his political differences with the pro-immigration French president to bask in the rich history that the United States shares with the French country. Trump’s trip is to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the entry of the United States into World War I, where he will attend the Bastille Day parade on Friday. White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer said “the two leaders will further build on the strong counterterrorism cooperation and economic partnership between the two countries, and they will discuss many other issues of mutual concern,” USA Today reported. President Trump is steadfast in his goal to make our country great again and forge better international relationships, despite the rhetoric-filled propaganda that the liberal media continues to slander him with. It’s pretty hilarious that no matter what they do to bring our president down, they only continue to make themselves look like the world’s biggest jackasses. Perhaps it’s time that CNN changes their slogan to “The Most Trusted Name in News” to “Holy Crap, We Really Suck.” Tags The Next News Network LATEST CONSPIRACY THEORIES NEWS Duterte Daily News Breaking News DONALD Donald trump TRUMP TRUMP LATEST NEWS USA morning news abs cbn aguirre ariana grande binira binuking breaking President Donald Trump President Trump RONNIE DAYAN Rais Magufuli news breaking news 365 fox news obama

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waitingtogogold-blog · 7 years ago

Conversation

(Putin’s private residence. The

Kremlin.)

PUTIN

Oh fuck . . . Donald. Donald. Donald wake up

TRUMP What?

PUTIN

Aw... I spilled beer down my front

TRUMP

Where the hell are we?

PUTIN

Relax, we’re chilling in the cut

TRUMP

Aw man... last night was the grand slam

PUTIN

Well guess what?

TRUMP What?

PUTIN

We bout to do it all again

TRUMP

Shut the front door

PUTIN

Shut the back

TRUMP

Shut the blinds, they get in through the cracks

PUTIN

What you talking bout? Donald, just relax

TRUMP

I’m talkin those pesky Mexicans, Vlad. Wetbacks

breaking for the border make me so mad

PUTIN

Well I’m talkin bout those wretched Chechnyans, Donnie.

Drop a bomb on em and watch them run like convicts

TRUMP

Yeah, or do like in the days when you were commies:

build a wall around em and watch em all go hungry...

Wouldn’t that be funny?

PUTIN

Donnie you sick.

TRUMP

And its contagious

PUTIN

Put me in a cage I’m a get outrageous

TRUMP

Stages, Vlad, remember what happened last night?

PUTIN Nyet

TRUMP

You got sick on Aung Sang then your tried to start a

fight

PUTIN

With who?

TRUMP

With Ban-Ki-Moon

PUTIN

Yikes. But it aint no G8 without an 8-ball, am I right?

TRUMP

Vlad you can summit up. But remember? I think we signed

some shitty deal about cutting emissions by November.

PUTIN

Fuck emissions! I’m on a mission to miss targets, kick

it down the road while I mix liquors, fuck deadlines

I’ll be doing lines, tell em all we gone fishing for

nuclear fission.

TRUMP

Yeah! Or fishing for poon-tang, bitches to bang

PUTIN

But watch they don’t come back to haunt you like a

boomerang.

TRUMP

What exactly do you mean by that?

PUTIN

I’m just saying watch your back.

TRUMP

What have you heard?

PUTIN

Not a word.

TRUMP

Are you sure?

PUTIN

Hey, cut me some slack! And lets get back to the matter

at hand, hand me that phone, I’ve got a headache like a

brass band playing in my dome.

TRUMP

So what do you propose?

PUTIN

I propose to blow my load, blow the national bank roll,

roll up a hundred thousand rouble note and stick it up

my nose, who knows? Once we get this bender started

there’s no knowing where it goes.

TRUMP

An early grave, some would say; that’s where we’re

headed if we keep behaving brave

PUTIN

You scared, Trump? Too much for you to handle?

TRUMP

Please! I ain’t no chump. You can’t hold a candle to

these N.U.Ts - Alright Putin, do your worst. I’ll put

you in a hearse before we reach the second verse.

BOTH (CHORUS)

WE GOT THIS, WE GOT IT LOCKED DOWN, APOCALYPSE

NOW!

PUT THE HAMMER AND THE SICKLE IN THE BLENDER WITH

THE EAGLE, BLAOW!

PUTIN

C’mon let’s go then! Bring me the blow then! Want so

much cocaine up in this bitch its gonna look like its

snowin

TRUMP

Bring in Snowden -

PUTIN

What? What did you say?

TRUMP

C’mon, Vlad. I’m kidding

PUTIN

Donnie you’re a villain

TRUMP

Fake news... but if you were willing

PUTIN

You’re trippin

TRUMP

Quit lippin and hear me out: I wanna kill em

PUTIN

Get real

TRUMP

Get a machine gun and riddle em

PUTIN

Or rip out his toe nails and play tiddly winks with em

TRUMP

Yeah! Hit em with some real KGB riddim

PUTIN

Rid em of his eyelids and make him viddy videos of

dying kids

TRUMP

Like in Syria

PUTIN

Seriously? You want to step into that arena?

TRUMP

I’d say we already did

PUTIN

Well let me make it clear to ya: you don’t ever mention

that shit when you’re near to me

TRUMP

Relax Vlad, you’re too easy! I’m just busting your

chops

PUTIN

Well watch it.

TRUMP

You know how it goes; the only chemical weapons I’m

trying to fuck with are goin up my nose. Where the hoes

at?

PUTIN

I’ll get them here in seconds flat - but these honeys

ain’t no playboy bunnies you best be prepared for that

TRUMP

What, you think this is my first rodeo cuz? I’ve rode

every miss universe that there ever was

PUTIN

I’m not talkin bout no pitch and putt I’m talkin bout

gettin a nut, these bitches from the bolshoi will make

your balls go oy-vey! Mia will make you mumble. Natalia

leave you stumblin. And when Natasha shakes her ass she

makes the Kremlin crumble

TRUMP

Oh boy I’m ready to rumble

PUTIN

I’m telling you man these girls are hardcore, they’ve

got superpowers - they’ll light a fire, satisfy your

every desire for hours - and if you get too hot they’ll

cool you off with a little golden showers

TRUMP

Think its time they visit Trump towers - whoa wait,

what have you heard?

PUTIN

Nothin... but a little bird told me bout your date with

those two Moscow girls

TRUMP

Well I don’t know what you been told but the only gold

I’m fuckin with is cold hard cash - I respect bitches

too much to let them piss on my fat white ass

PUTIN

Trump its true you rich as Ritchie - and Ritchie richer

than Lionel - but I hear you like gettin treated like a

human urinal

TRUMP

They’re lyin! Whoever said that, I’ll rip out their

spinal. There’s no excuse for fake news, its not true

and thats final!

PUTIN

Alright, keep your panties on before we get our rocks

off

TRUMP

Lets just get those girls in here before we both go

soft

BOTH (CHORUS)

WE GOT THIS, WE GOT IT LOCKED DOWN, APOCALYPSE

NOW!

PUT THE HAMMER AND THE SICKLE IN THE BLENDER WITH

THE EAGLE, BLAOW!

PUTIN

Gold is this interior, colder than Siberia

Seriously serving cinders to this Syrian hysteria

Hurry the fuck up with the beer and the chlamydia

Kidding you not, these bitches got us backing up like a

pack of hyenas

Heinous crimes they accuse me of misdemeanours

Like dealing from the bottom of the deck to feed my

minions

And maybe murderin a meddlin mogul or two

These apparatchiks are riddickin me tell me what would

you do

And the international community can suck a dick too

Coz this pipelines the lifeline and the hands on the

dial are mine

My oil rigs digging holes in the dirt, so I can fuck

the earthNow think on that before you scrap the sack

you tap may be your ownSo watch the thrown, homes, and

let me hit it while I spark this bone

TRUMP

All you donkeys suck my donkey dick quick, I’m the

elephant up in the room

Fat greedy and white although I look like a tangeroon

Silver spoon for the day-glo dego-hatin goon

Gimme a blunt and pass that ass till its red as a

babboon

Now plenty puny pitiful pedantic motherfuckers want to

pen a clever witty little trip about Trump

Well if Spicer can’t dice em I guess I’d better step on

And lay down the law of the land from coast to coast

Mirror mirror who do you figure is the most

Illest of the boastful ways, when I take the stage

Not one fuck given about what nobody says

Or whats written down in the script, scripts are for

bitches

Who needs to read to lead when you got riches

(MORE)

TRUMP (cont’d)

Ask any of my hitches, my pervious marriages

Soon as I flip my cheque book, they dropping those

assault charges

Like dope beats, put a gag order on them freaks

Gag the nation, now I’m the only one that speaks

Some say I’m a fascist antichrist, a messianic

psychopath

Tyranny of stupidity, pity the punk that fucks with me

When I’m rollin up the funk

Re-elect in 2024 before I give it up

PUTIN

Aw, fuck...

TRUMP

Whoa, I’m fucked up now

PUTIN Donald

TRUMP What?

PUTIN

Donald, I gotta say this while I got this vodka in me

man

TRUMP Yeah?

PUTIN

Man - you’re the fuckin best man, we’re a team man put

it to the test man - we’re allstars now, like Kennedy

and Khrushchev and shit now man

TRUMP

Kennedy and Khruschev...

PUTIN

When the fry dives off with China, lets just say theres

no one I’d rather have on the other end of that line,

so glad you’re in the white house man and putting you

there was the best decision of my life...

TRUMP

Yeah, fuck China - wait, what? You talkin bout, you

didn’t put me in the white house, fuck you mean?

PUTIN

Oh, sure Donald

TRUMP What?

PUTIN

No, thats cool. If thats the way you want it I can play

along too

TRUMP

I’m nobody’s fool

PUTIN

Never said that about you. But maybe just take a moment

to remember who you talkin to

TRUMP What?

PUTIN

Where you think all that cash came from? Rainin down

from heaven son? More like rainin down from the

Kremlin, cunt. We both know that, so why front, Trump?

TRUMP

Fuck you, I don’t know shit, all I know is that you got

some real strange ideas in that big bald head of yours.

PUTIN

Donald, you’re my bitch.

TRUMP

Now that’s steppin the line!

PUTIN

Settle down and let me put you on the truth one time.

What happened just now?

TRUMP

We got our nuts, kpaow! Put the hammer and the sickle

in the blender... etc.

PUTIN

Donald, there were no honeys here.

TRUMP

You mean, we fucked eachother?

PUTIN

More like I fucked you, my brother from another

TRUMP

What? Fake news! How can that be?

PUTIN

Its what we do in the KGB; its the only way we can be

sure of loyalty

TRUMP

But that’s gay! Vlad, thats gay

PUTIN

What the fuck you say?

TRUMP

Cmon, you fucked another man in the ass, I don’t see

how you can see it another way

PUTIN

No its not gay, its like the opposite of gay

TRUMP

How does that even begin to make sense - ay?

BOTH (CHORUS)

WE GOT THIS, WE GOT IT LOCKED DOWN, APOCALYPSE

NOW!

PUT THE HAMMER AND THE SICKLE IN THE BLENDER WITH

THE EAGLE, BLAOW!

(Suddenly the beat has stopped. The

lights are dimmer)

TRUMP

Whoa - Vlad! What happened to the beat?

PUTIN

I don’t know - shit - I can’t feel my feet

TRUMP

My nose is all runny - my hands have gone funny!

PUTIN

Hate to break it to you but they’ve always been that

way, Trump

TRUMP

No, Vlad, I’m telling you, something was up with that

last bump

PUTIN

Relax, Donnie, we ran out of coke so I crushed up some

of my girlfriends amphetamine I stole

TRUMP

Let me see the label

PUTIN

It says ’ketamine’

TRUMP

What? Vlad, we’re in the k-hole!

PUTIN

What are you talking bout? The only hole I’ve been in

yours

TRUMP

You say you stole this from your girlfriend?

PUTIN Da

TRUMP

What is she, a horse?

PUTIN

What you trying to say, guy?

TRUMP

This tranquilliser that we’re high on’s left us liable

to die. Don’t you see Vlad? The situations very very

bad - we could both have cardiac arrests, this trip

might be our last

PUTIN

Hey when did we leave? Why are we out in the street?

TRUMP

I don’t know, but it should be cold, instead I’m

sweating in this heat

PUTIN

It should be daylight, but with those clouds its like

its night

TRUMP

Where is everybody, there’s not a body in sight

PUTIN

What’s that smell in the air?

TRUMP

Are those bones over there?

PUTIN

I don’t like this Donnie

10.

TRUMP

Where the hell are we?

PUTIN

I think I saw a sign back there, it said ’this way to

Pyongyang square’

TRUMP

I think we’d best get out of here *cough*

PUTIN

Let’s just lie down a minute, until we’re thinking

clear

TRUMP

Good idea - no, Vlad, that’s the radiation sickness

poisoning our lungs

PUTIN

Donnie I’m so fucked up I... can’t think of a single

thing that rhymes with lungs...

TRUMP

Vlad - I can feel my hair falling out, my face turning

to jelly

PUTIN

I hate to tell you Donald but its always been... never

mind

TRUMP

Vlad - I don’t think we’re going to make it

PUTIN

Donald - if thats the truth I can’t take it

TRUMP

Will you do me a favour?

PUTIN What?

TRUMP

Help me savour these last moments together?

PUTIN What?

TRUMP

Once more, take me in your arms, before the both of us

have bought the farm, and so with our last breath, I

guess, attest that our loves all thats left

11.

PUTIN

*cough* Oh, Donnie

TRUMP

*cough* Oh, Vlad

(Spotlight rises slowly on the pair,

curled up together on the floor, along

with a menacing noise)

PUTIN

Look-look! The blinding light! Is it God?

TRUMP

No! It’s the mushroom cloud! Nuclear fallout!

PUTIN

Here it comes!

TRUMP

Oh, Vlad!

PUTIN

Oh, Donnie!

BOTH

PUTIN Whoa

TRUMP What?

I... LOVE...

(Spot cuts out. Lights are back up.

Beat. The two of them scramble up off

the floor, straighten out, get out their

phones)

PUTIN

Uh, hello? Yes, it’s me Natalia

TRUMP

Reince? Reince, listen... yes, bomb them, tomahawk the

shit out of them - what? No, they can’t have any

abortions, in fact give them twins, just for asking

PUTIN

They voted what? Well, kill them, and mail their heads

to Yeltsin. I know, but he collects them. Oh and

Natalia - get me the briefcase. Yes, the one with the

red button. I don’t know, I just want to look at it.

12.

TRUMP

Why would I want to hear my approval ratings, Reince,

oh, but listen - ehh, can you get me, the uh, the

briefcase? You know the one I’m talking about. The

nuclear, briefcase, yeah, ixnay on the uclearnay ombay

- the launch codes, Reince, for God sake get a grip

man. I don’t know, it just feels like one of those

days. Okay, bye. Love you, bye.

PUTIN So.

TRUMP So.

PUTIN Hmm.

TRUMP

Well Vlad

PUTIN

Well Donald

TRUMP

Quite the party

PUTIN Yeah

TRUMP

You should come visit me and...

PUTIN

Melania

TRUMP

Melania, at uh, Mar-a-Lago, y’know. Lie in the sun,

drink some pina-coladas.

PUTIN

Thank you, but I’m sure you and your melanoma can enjoy

the sun just fine on your own.

TRUMP

Well, ok. Bye Vlad.

PUTIN

Bye, Donald.

TRUMP

Wait, Vlad.

13.

PUTIN Donald

TRUMP

Don’t you think its time we changed our ways?

PUTIN

I don’t follow

TRUMP

Something happened last night, didn’t it?

PUTIN

I don’t know what happened last night.

TRUMP

C’mon, something happened. Something real. And I’m not

just talking about the anal date-rape

PUTIN

I think we’ve had quite enough of-

TRUMP

Vlad. I know you feel it too

PUTIN

Donald-

TRUMP

C’mon Vlad. A love like ours could change the world.

PUTIN

Well... maybe... one more bump. For Putin and Trump.

(Beat begins to rise again)

BOTH (CHORUS)

WE GOT THIS, WE GOT IT LOCKED DOWN, APOCALYPSE

NOW!

PUT THE HAMMER AND THE SICKLE IN THE BLENDER WITH

THE EAGLE, BLAOW!

0 notes

apsbicepstraining · 7 years ago

Text

Da Man Wit’ Da Money: 77 Hip-Hop Lyrics About Donald Trump

Donald Trump I cleared Forbes’ list this month!

Now I’m knocking like Jehovah; let me in now, let me in now Bill Gates, Donald Trump, let me in now

I’m so appalled Spalding ball, Baldin’ Donald Trump, takin’ dollars from y’all

So come on gettin’ lovely I’m gettin’ into the money The Donald Trump money

I buy vehicles wit straight cash, have convenes with Donald Trump Y’all meet wit Honda , no payments for 12 months

Going Donald Trump counts on the corner I made a million on that corner

Im bout to do a lyric with Bono Pocket Trump like I only impressed the lottery, lotto

Yo Ice, I did a concert in the White House And after that me and Donald Trump hung out

10.

I gotta say what’s up to Digital Underground and Humpty Hump Cause he makin’ more than Donald Trump

11.

Can I live? I make yo’ ass over the hump We tryna get money so we can be livin’ like Trump

12.

We can talk Trump talk, real estate, capitals, and bonds Or gangsta shit, my Rugers and Glocks in palm

13.

Trump change?( Chump change) Nah TRUMP change patnah not chump change

14.

The’ S’ in skypage certainly stands for sex Beeper’s goin off like Don Trump gets checks

15.

Suck a dick and lick an ass exactly to get a pump Fuck Black Caesar niggaz, announce me Black Trump

16.

I’m back with the funk, chump You crave funk, how many chunks? I went spunk I’m well-known like Donald Trump

17.

Warning you chump, psyche is out for lunch Given the dominance perforate, soon to be paid like Donald Trump

18.

He get apprehensive is seeking to startle I hit him with the pump Put more cash in my pockets than Donald Trump

19.

Got a business mind so if I lose the funk I’ll still be in the members of this house gettin’ paid like Trump

20.

Poisonous sting which thrashes up and act chumps Raise a heavy generator But yo, guess who’s the pitch-black Trump?

21.

You can boom shalock and move to the resounds I pump But I ain’t ceasing till I’m shitting on Donald Trump

22.

New Trump, brand new funk Keep the pocket full of California skunk

23.

Serena Williams, downtown unoccupied and Trump Who wanna slammed her rump, dunce, yes I fetch the pump

24.

Now I ain’t talkin bout no bullshit ass flippin z’s I’m talkin Trump type access, they comin off a mob of keys

25.

So all I’d wanna got the chamber stumped I’m smokin, make dough like Trump

26.

In hot pursuit of Donald Trump rap loot Produce what you feel with Navy Seal mic troops

27.

Im merely tryin to get rich like Trump The home run king is now in a slump, extend me a hunk

28.

The brand-new Don Trump is Bill Gates Not because his occupation, it’s’ cause we respect his cake

29.

Im the young Donald Trump, is yall listening me? Girls on the side path, yeah they cheerin me

30.

Niggas always expect to see us two together, stable The good duo they read since Trump and Marla Maple

31.

Doin’ it like Donald Trump I’m sendin’ this one to the women with body And all my hustlas with the grill front

32.

Teddy Riley, Michael Tyler, large-scale Trump thang Million dollars, sunny holler big bucks man

33.

Now they announce me Snoopy Trump I keep my heater open, cause I love to bust

34.

Throw my weight like Sherman Klump I gotta stand up my owned like Donald Trump

35.

I’m Donald Trump in a lily-white tee and lily-white ones The exchange is money nigga, you want some?

36.

Bill Gates, Donald Trump, them a require you In a the Pentium five them haggard wire you

37.

I’m Donald Trump, with raccoon hairdos I’m Lil Kim, so plastic , now it only really scares dudes

38.

Time to flip the labor move the block bump Boys from the hood announce me black Donald Trump

39.

I spend ludicrous money, private fowl money That Bill Gates, Donald Trump, Bloomberg money

40.

Resurrection of the real, time to get richer than Trump

41.

I’m lyin’ to Christ, put your fuckin’ sticker in a vice I’m like Trump in the Apprentice, merely fire at night

42.

You burnt mothafucka Donald Trump nigga I’m killing these niggas can’t fuck nigga

43.

Breathing off a Trump budget Fresh outa Bloomie’s with the Louie luggage

44.

Give me honour and fortune, me and Trump on golf courses With that being said, give me Tiger’s athletics endorsements

45.

And I’m gonna chopped this whole ki into a lotta lumps Next era you determine me I’ll have money like Donald Trump

46.

Homies on the blocking can say whatever they want I don’t wanna has become a trader, I wanna be a Trump

47.

The Apprentice but not Trump Im the nigga with Glocks and pumps

48.

1st of the month, Trump to the buyers Red toupe on the coupe you’ve been fired

49.

Get money like Donald Trump Double barrel on that pump

50.

Money buy the DIGITS I get Donald Trump callin’ me a fund wizard

51.

Richest nigga in my hood: announce me Donald Trump The form that count my coin while I inhale a blunt

52.

Take over the world when I’m on my Donald Trump shit Look at all this fund, ain’t that some shit?

53.

I’m tryna stuff em until I can’t fit no more I’m talking Donald Trump level I’m trying to get these dreamings off the ground All aboard for the shuttle

54.

Got enough, got enough Tryna’ get onto, til I’m on my Donald Trump, Donald Trump

55.

And we don’t stop my nigga I’m like Donald Trump nigga

56.

I started out transgressed, get rich, lost article then became it back Like Trump being up down up, play with cash

57.

I’m a good-looking rapper, I ain’t tryna stunt I’m a ardor my dampen like Donald Trump

58.

Hustle a palace, Donald trump 6 mil I got a 6th sense so known better 6 feel

59.

Walk up on you whiskey maskin’ punk And burn them kills just like I’m Donald Trump

6-.

Plottin’ on Donald Trump I was 15 years old when I hit that chopper

61.

You can hate, don’t frown, my nigga With Donald Trump in the stem, my nigga

62.

And Donald Trump, and Carlos Slim And call Obama, Oprah Winfrey then

63.

Hugo Boss, I only Donald Trump you Michael Kors sweater with cocaine on the garment Woke up in mansion but I grew up in apartment

64.

Trump Tower with Donald( Donald) I can’t drive a Honda( uh uh) Now I get options, you can detest me if you wanna

65.

No Donald Trump, Bill Gates or Bruce Wayne The only thing I had to my figure was a few dreams

66.

You makin’ patterns raise ya frost and Guinness And workin’ pussy that’s my type of fitness I’m countin’ fund like I’m Donald Trump

67.

Wit a pocket full of lint and a Big Meech letter And I’m fuck wat Donald Trump talk bout I like change when I convened Rosetta

68.

I’m fucked worse than Donald Trump On Lexapro in Mexico across from a Texaco in McDonald’s drunk

69.

Yeah thumbs up I’ve seen more punctures than a golf course on Donald Trump’s course

70.

Too much spinach to chew for niggas beefin ‘, So I’m out here trick or treatin ‘, can my niggas comprehend Bill Gates, Donald Trump , motherfucker let me in.

71.

Assassinate Trump like Im Zimmerman/ Now accept these terms as they came from Eminem

72.

Ah, my mention is Jibbs but they call me mighty Trump The kid down a live with an outerspace flow Stay brandished up, poking madden with a flow Jag chillin in the back with girls holla at a chump

73.

Ice Cube says you’re making more than Donald Trump So yo, go on and get your nose tied, Hump

74.

Cause ya boy’s in a slump I took her out of the jets The top floor of the Trump Had to hustle hard

75.

I’m on ridin’ humor my 12 -gauge pump Been a boss from the rush, croak getta like Trump

76.

Of a investigated off shotgun, hand on the pump Musty dead bodies and a catty bump, Trump

77.

Up like Donald Trump, chain moves like nunchucks She gon’ grind you up, twerk like she from Russia

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