#lynx plays kh3

[lynxgriffin]

I like that old time rock and roll

AS I PROMISED, IT’S TIME FOR RUNNING COMMENTARY WHILE I PLAY THROUGH KH3

It’s under the cut for anyone who wants to avoid spoilers!!

BUT YES OH MY GOODNESS, IT’S HERE NOW

OKAY EVERYONE

AFTER 13 YEARS OF WAITING

THE TIME IS HERE

THE TIME IS NOW

LET’S

B E G I N

Really, autosave? Okay then!

IMMEDIATE CUTSCENE

The whole series as chess match between Xehanort and Eraqus, this is so Homestuck

THIS VERSION OF DEARLY BELOVED. GUHH. MY HEART

UGH SOMETHING IS SQUEEZING MY CHEST

What are these little loading screen dooblydoos?

WOAH what is this town, I want to live here

Young Eraqus babe!!

Xehanort blames the Furry Squad

THE OPENING

WELL NOW I’M JUST THOROUGHLY FULL OF FEELINGS FOREVER

Also where do I learn to storyboard something like that

Well ain’t this just familiar!

Sora, THIS WAS YOOOUR LIFE!

I desire TRINITY FRIENDSHIPS

And hmmm I usually like to just attack a bunch, so we’ll go path of the warrior

He’s on the salt flats all of a sudden!

Ahh good ol Darkside, can’t go along without you, can we

OMG HJO sounds so older

Okay this scene was earlier in 2.8

TIME TO START FROM LEVEL 1 AGAIN

Also this version of this song is so pretty nnngh

THE GOOD BOYS

And there’s that line again!

2.9 YOU DONE PLAYED ME FOR A SUCKER

Hades it never works to use the FF sadboys

HERCULEAN EXPOSITION

Sora’s heart has bad aim as usual

NNGH I JUST LOVE THESE THREE

He can just run up walls now, it’s fine!

Aw man I was kinda hoping for field chatter, do we not have any of that?

Dat title crawl!!

I love Sora just casually sassing the god of the dead

We’re blasting off agaaaaain

HI AGAIN MALEFICENT AND PETE

I love how everyone is just like “oh great it’s you again”

Oh Maleficent you’re too smart to fall for that

YES CORRECT NAME ORDER

Hey I remember these guys from when Aqua fought them!

OH GOSH you can set the poor boy on fire!!

Aw yay no longer Junior Heroes!

I MUST GO FAST AND RUNNING TOO SLOW

Aw we didn’t get to do the actual saving people part

“He’s inconsequential” Oh that’s gonna come back and bite you, Maleficent

Aww I found some food ingredients! Probably for Remy later!

Man could really go for some blizzard spells about now

Lady how did you even get up there??

Here have you been standing there Atlas-ing the whole time??

Ahaa so that’s how we do forms around here!

OH HIIIIII XIGBAR

Is his hair getting more silver or am I imagining it

Good question there, Sora

Xigbar: Well, I’m here to be cryptic! And I’m done now! BYYYYEEE

Oh no them big sad eyes

Oh woah that’s a big fella

That we took out mostly via pirate ship, YEEEUH

I FOUND A HIDDEN MICKEY but I have no cell phone yet!

THE SPIKY FRIENDS ARE BACK

Okay that was a pretty heckin cool finisher

You know I was kinda worried about the textures in this earlier, but I gotta say in motion everything looks real great

Oh man they know how to make these battles satisfying

I BLEW UP A ROCK TITAN WITH A SPARKLY TRAIN

Oh hey check it out guys, we’ve arrived at heaven

Oh dang they did a nice job with the area here

THESE HEARTLESS SO COOL BUT ALSO TERRIFYING

HECK YES GOT SHOTLOCKS

WE got all the good candy now!!

Holy crap air stepping is uh! Nutty!

Oh hey there, all the remaining Titans

Wow okay first death because I had no clue what to do in that situation

Uuuugh okay I got FARTHER that time and I even got Antiform! But I’m still a bit confused as to how to get past this part, esp with no way to heal

THERE we go, got it on the third try!

And finished it off with a shotlock, niceeee

SASSED AT BY THE TRES CORNY BOYS

Sora: I’ll find my strength through the old-fashioned way: LEVELING UP

Holy cow the extra Keyblade stuff looks like it’ll actually be extra tricky in terms of technique

Dig faster, Pete! IT’S UNDER A BIG DOUBLEYOU

LMAO they just find Pandora’s Box and are like NEVER MIND THAT’S NOT THE SCARY BOX WE NEED

M E A N W H I L E

The good darkness boys!!

HE’S DONE SO MUCH GROWING

Back at this good ol’ darkness beach

He’s gonna sniff her out like a bloodhound!

PLAYING AS RIKU RIGHT THE HECK NOW

Oh he is a lot tougher, and good thing because it’s another demon wave

Well that was weird

WHAT it seriously got broken by a demon wave??

GOOD QUESTION RIKU

THE OTHER M E

Dang I love these title crawls and new remixes

Let’s Just Tease Sora Relentlessly: The Game

Ohhh man Aqua’s theme

YES LET’S FINALLY SEE KAIRI AND LEA HERE

*bangs fist on table* GIVE. LEA. NEW. CLOTHES

And yay Sora gets his new clothes!

HI THERE JIMINY

Awww it’s got the Dream Eater symbol on it!

New plaid outfit!!

Ohh I’m excited to see where we actually go next

HIS CELL PHONE RING IS HIS THEME

Sora: WHAT IS CELL PHONE???

HI IENZO

Ienzo: Come on Aeleus, just get over your horrific betrayal and murders like I did!!

Ienzo: We’ve discovered a Heart Hotel in you Sora; turns out it’s been there for awhile

Chip and Dale: Please help Sora he’s terrible with technology

OH NOW THERE’S THE TITLE HAHAHA FUUUUCK YOOOU

Holy cow the gummi ship seems way harder to control now is it just me??

Okay whelp, makes sense Twilight Town is next!

“Hurting is part of caring” THAT MUST BE WHY I’M HURTIN RIGHT NOW

HOLY HOLY SHIT THAT HAS SO MUCH HP—oh we don’t have to fight the whole thing THANK GOODNESS

ALSO CURE THANK GOODNESS

“This is underprecedented!”

HAYNER YOU GIANT DOOF

Everyone here to find the Roxases!

Oh nooo photo cuties

WE FOUND THE HIDDEN MICKEYS

OKAY I actually really need food in order to live so I need to take a quick lunch break but

THIS WILL CONTINUE ON ALMOST IMMEDIATELY

AAAAAA

[lynxgriffin]

Led Zeppelin was right all along

It’s my FINAL PIECE of KH3 commentary! That’s right, I’ve finished the game! Commentary for me finishing it is under the cut!

Okay guys, this is it

It’s time to finish this sucker

It’s time for all of my feelings to get curbstomped and then cracked in half over a knee

Turns out I’ve caught a cold so this might be tougher to do

But I’m still going to do it

AWAY. WE. GOOOOO

And after beating this gummi boss again…

Ahhh there he is at last

The old fart

…So weird that it’s not Leonard Nimoy though

Xehanort: Let’s just try out this whole apocalypse thing and see how it goes

It’s rainin’ Heartless, hallelujah

LMAO there isn’t even an enemy counter, it’s just:

ENEMIES. YES, ALL OF THEM. ALL THE TIME. FOREVER

And I just blew up ten million Heartless with a train, THIS IS THE SHINIEST APOCALYPSE EVER

Ohh, once again, hate that tunnel

IT’S A TRAP

At least Aqua didn’t fall for that

Oh dang he’s got No Name there

NOOOO SUNSHINE BOY

Oh well now that’s cheating

FUKYEAH GOOFY

Donald’s fukkin pissed

Did Donald just Megaflare this bitch

ArE yoU kiDDinG mE

Oh great, one of you again

Aqua: Never mind, that is way damn too many Heartless

HE SCREAM, AGAIN

SORA PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER WE’RE STILL EARLY IN FINAL BATTLE MODE

Well that was five different layers of OH SHIT

Oh hey back at that chess metaphor HI AGAIN YOUNG ERAQUS

Wait the hell kind of chess move was that

MEANWHILE, BACK ON THE SALT FLATS

ThE FINAL WORLD, HUH

Chirithy!!!!

Chirithy: So yeah you’ve kinda died a couple times previously just by being unconscious a lot

Sora: YEAH WELL time to get back to life

Sora: THERE’S PUZZLES IN HEAVEN, TOO??

THERE’S PUZZLES IN HEAVEN YUP, BETTER GET TO THAT

Ohhhh no the sparkly stars are KHUX Keykids, aren’t they :(((

Ugh it’s the little star soul stories that are getting to me :(

Sora bein’ a pal even to all the souls in heaven, gosh darn

OH SURE JUST KEEP THAT FROM THE AUDIENCE

OMG this soul is longing for his kismesis, what a nerd

“What a weird place” YEAH NO SHIT

Well it’s nice to see THESE Soras are having a great time

Perhaps this game was taking the idea of Sorabits a tad too literally

Also actually two quick questions here:

1) Why is Chirithy in heaven?

2) Sora were you instagramming from heaven??

Sora: So heaven’s been a trip and all but I’ve still got endgame to do, STAY COOL FUZZY FRIEND

Wait a bloop it sent him back in time too??

Insert 2001 Space Odyssey reference here

Oh now we’re in DIFFERENT heaven??

Okay yeah now I have no clue where we’re going from here

Man here I was expecting to fight all the Norts and instead it’s…Heartless…Grim Reaper

I’m starting to suspect this is not the real Jiminy

This is kind of a weird callback to KH1, innit

Yeah I was just wondering that myself

Oh hey Youngnort

See? Grim Reaper Heartless, I knew it

I gotta say that after Sora dying and going to KH heaven this is…kinda weirder coming afterwards

I’m kind of worried about where this is going

This is like Three Days of the Condor, I TRUST NO ONE

WE FINALLY GOT A TITLE CRAWL???

WHELP. ROUND TWO, I GUESS

Guys, let’s…let’s not do this again

You ever get a sense of deja vu

OHOHOHOOOOO THIS IS DIFFERENT

“WHO ARE YOU??” “I’M YOU BUT STRONGER”

Terra: I’ll kick every ass! I’ll kick your ass! I’LL KICK MY OWN ASS

Gad damn the bullshit never stops around here, does it

We’ve done this before but I DUN CARE since this is my favorite boss battle music

Meanwhile the Unreal Engine’s just huffing and puffing trying to keep up

:O!!! EPHEMER!!

WHATRE U DOIN IN A HEARTLESS TORNADO

And all the dead Keykids came to help!

Ohhhhhh myyyyyyyyy goooooooooooosh

HAHA SO THAT’S HOW THEY INTEGRATED THOSE PEOPLE THAT WON THE THING

Congrats Keykids, U ARE ATTACKS

That’s…that’s really sweet actually

That’s a whole lot of Unicornis and Vulpes in there

OMG I was so busy watching those names I didn’t even realize I was supposed to avoid dying

FINALLY CURAGA???

I dunno Lea that was already a pretty big bad

Aw darn they Norted Repliku

Or wait no Pastku?

Pastku you’re such a little shit

Lea: That wasn’t blundering! That was failing, WITH STYLE

HE LOOM

Unreal Engine: Please…help…I’m dying Squirtle

Oh hey FINALLY super powerful magic users like Yen Sid get involved!

And Moses parted the Heartless Sea

And hey finally got Starlight!

Well ain’t this a familiar setup

I miss Leonard Nimoy :(

Well I’m glad we get to save and shop before we all die horribly!

….Wait haven’t we all already died horribly??

FINALLY We get to fight some Norts!!

Took out Xigbar first

Yeah Xigbar I’m really not sure all that hoohah was worth it

Are we gonna do this for each one or do we have to pick and choose?

Oh well that takes care of Pastku so maybe not

SKIRT RIKU VS SKIRT RIKU

Oh that’s creepy actually

OH NO! Repliku :(((

Sora…you just gonna leave that…okay

So now we got some Neophytes to deal with

Well I was gonna go after Mar first but I guess Luxord is our opponent now

AW DAMN I hated this part from before!

Oh wait that wasn’t hard at all you just look behind those stupid cards

Luxord: Well it’s been fun, time to die

Why does everyone’s teeth look blue??

Really liking all these remixes of the old boss themes tho

Aaaaand down goes Mar

And what’s nice is partners have mostly worn down the last Nort present!

Larx is an asshole to the very end

Door puzzles ohhhh nooooooo

Well thank goodness we worked out that nonsense

Who to help first? REDHEAD SQUAD

If that’s Xion I’m going to be SO UPSET

At least we get to fight WITH Kairi even if not as her

Lea is SO ANGER

Ohhhhh BUUUUUURN

Oh well that ain’t good

XION NOOOOOOOOOO

Absolutely not, Xemnas!!

*throws hands in the air* OHHHHHHHH

HE KNOWS

Oh fuck you Xemnas HDU

Ohhhhh sheeeeeeet

THE BOY IS BACK

JUST STAB ME IN THE HEART WITH THE OTHER PROMISE, OKAY

Called out by Roxas daaaayum

Gah dammit not again! STOP DOING KAIRI DIRTY

GET READY FOR: TRIPLE KEYKIDS ASSKICKIN

Hot damn but it’s satisfying to beat the crap out of Saix with Sora, Roxas and Xion all at once while The Other Promise just blasts in the background

Lea: I’m not mad I’m just disappointed

Awww maaaaaan

OH GOSH SEASALT TRIO HUG

THEY’RE ALL TOGETHER AGAIN SOB SOB

Now to the Wayfinder family! Took out Vanyeetas first!

Sora: Hey WTF that’s my face you got

Yeah I gotta agree I don’t know which part of that was okay honestly

WHELP no time to think on it gotta take out Terranort

Since we got back Roxas and Xion can we finally get Terra back??

Sora: TERRA PLEASE STOP, IT’S TOO WEIRD

OHHHHHHH!! OH OH OH

That was metal as all hell

YAAAAAAY

WAYFINDER FAMILY IS HERE

Ohhhh gooooosh

Everyone’s together and I’m full of rainbows

MAN so we got…three Norts left, don’t we

Guess the only way out of this is up

What we’ve just been cloning No Name the whole time??

Okay, FOUR left, we gotta deal with Ansem, Xemnas and Youngnort first

Oh sheesh that was Youngnort dying, thought it was me for a second

Youngnort: Just one last piece of cryptic bullshit to leave you with! BYYYYEEEE

Aaaand that’s Ansem down

Ansem: Must…pontificate more…before…I die

Haha took out Xemnas with flying rocket punch nanobots

Xemnas: Regrets…I’ve had a few…

But then again, too few to mention?

Sora: Life is pain, Xemnas! Anyone who says otherwise is Norting you

Oh boy oh boy, all we have left now is…the old fart…

Oh this is gonna piss me off good, ain’t it

YUP, I’M PISSED

YOU DONE HER DIRTY AGAIN

Nomura do we need to sit you down as a group and learn you some things about NOT DOING THAT

That was…kind of a cool moment I guess?? BUT I’M STILL MAD

Oh shitcakes

The world to come is death from above I guess

Donald and Goofy just coming in like “Hey…what’d we miss?”

I’m honestly really glad they’re here tho, TRINITY ALLLLL THE WAY

The whole gang here together again IRONING OUT THE PLOT POINTS

Trophy here???

OH HEY WE’RE BACK HERE

A town of nothing but Norts

OH I forgot THESE WEIRDOS were in trailers somehow

The hell is happening anymore

An Organization so nice we fought ‘em twice!

The scary music is playing but I have no clue where to goooo

Well it took me five minutes just to find the dang guys before Thundaga finished them off

Oh really now!

ONE MORE TITLE CRAWL FOR Y’ALL

HE WAS AN ANGRY GOAT WHO SAW THE MOVIE INCEPTION ALL ALONG

SHEESH that was a nutty battle that took awhile

Well I think I won THAT battle anyway

Is this gonna be a THAT WASN’T EVEN MY FINAL FORM or what

More callbacks!

This is the fight that never eeeeends, yes it goes on and on my frieeeends

OH that was fuckin weird but COOL

I LOVE THE TRINITY

EVERYONE ELSE AGAIN TOO

HAHA OH DAMN

EVEN ERAQUS GETS TO REAPPEAR

Yaaay my favorite terrible dad

That look from Eraqus OMG

Babbeh Eraqus so cute

Now YOU get the goofy apocalypse weapon, Sora!

More dad reconciliations sob

Oh gosh I’m so glad we get this before we end

ohhhh noooo

Oh no you know shit’s serious when you enter a blocked scene

DOES EVERYONE FINALLY GET TO GO HOME NOW

Man everything’s just so shiny now

A CHIRITHY FOUND A VEN

NEW OUTFITS FOR SEASALT GANG FINALLY

THE EXPANDED SEASALT GANG

YAAAY NAMINE BACK

LET HER LIVE HER LIFE NOW

MOTHAFOCKIN BEACH PARTY FOR EVERYONE YES

FOR REALLY EVERYONE FOR REAL??

Also dang sing us out Utada

*points and points* THAT? FINAL SHOT???

WHERE’S THE BOY

What did you do to my son Nomura

LOOK IF YOU’RE GONNA POP HIM OUT LIKE THAT I AT LEAST WANT TO BE VALIDATED FOR MY THEORIES

THE CREDITS ARE ROLLING AND THERE’S STILL THINGS I FEEL LIKE I’M MISSING

Also just interjecting here but damn that endgame was so long IT FELT LIKE A WHOLE ‘NOTHER GAME

And now the pretty march music with the Super Longer Credits—I CAN’T BELIEVE DRAKE BELL WAS YOUNG ERAQUS

*points* WHY IS FURRY SQUAD VOICED HERE??

Well if nothing else gonna get me a kickass OST out of this

HERE we go, post credits stuff

Here’s the Furry Squad!

LUXU WAS XIGBAR WELL OKAY

What fresh bullshit is thiiiiiiis

OH HEY WE’D ALMOST FORGOTTEN ABOUT THEM

Hey where is Ava

Oh fuuuuuck yoooou Luxugbar

Whaaaaaaaat

THE BOY

SHIBUYA????????????

*throws hands in the air* I GOT NOTHIN FOLKS

I GOT ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN

THE END PAGE!!!! SURE AS HELL IS WHAT THAT IS

OKAY SO LIKE

PLEASE, HELP ME OUT HERE, SECRET ENDING

IS THE NEXT GAME JUST GONNA STRAIGHT UP BE VERUM REX?

NOPE THERE IS NOTHING MORE THAT’S JUST IT

WELL THAT WAS

A WHOLE DAMN LOT WASN’T IT

Nomura I am in fact going to die and go to your house and haunt it and push all of your things off shelves like a cat

ALL OF THE THINGS

OFF OF. YOUR SHELVES.

Okay so overall I did really enjoy the game but also I’m just ????

?????????

??????

Like my reaction is pretty much just

LATER NERDS THIS HAS BEEN LYNX SUFFERS THROUGH KINGDOM HEARTS 3

I HOPE YOU HAD FUN CAUSE I DID

I think I’m gonna go lie down now

[lynxgriffin]

Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots

Got even further today! And here’s the running commentary! Under the cut again for spoilers!

Okay! Time to get back to it!!

Aww we found the nephews!

And another hidden mickey!

Aaaand I think we’re about to find Remy too

Let me in I want to cook with my rat friend!!

Oops looks like we stumbled into the woods anyway

MONKEY HEARTLESS

Awww yes I got the roaring rapids kinda ride deal!

THERE IS RATTY FRIEND

CONTROL THE SORA VIA HIS HAIR

I can’t save you right now Roxas, I HAVE TO COLLECT PARSLEY FOR THIS RAT

Aaand we’re back at Ira’s mansion!

Sora all like NO SUDDEN TOUCHIES

VERBOTEN

Ienzo: I could smell your computer incompetence from across the worlds

Told you guys virtual reality is just magical bullshit!!

Oh geez someone get this poor boy a cot and a pillow

Sora: I don’t computer good, please help

Uh oh Even got Norted didn’t he

Hayner: I FORGOT I HAVE TO GO SWAT SOME BEES

Suspiciously no music here

Hiiiii Norty Guys

Sora: DATA IS REAL PEOPLE TOO

AGAIN, GOOFY IS THE SMART ONE

Press X to doubt on that, Xemnas

DEATH BY TEACUPS

Gotta say that attraction flow is kinda OP

HIIII SCROOGE

Donald is always making a menace of himself, Scrooge, that’s normal

OMG I want cake now too

Remy no longer cooks for the love for food, he’s HOOKED INTO CAPITALISM

No I love Remy Ratatouille is a good movie

DON’T YOU TRY AND SPOILE ME TOO, GAME

Oh I see Bee Swatting Alley has turned into a little drive-in theater

There was a hole here…it’s gone now

Roxas has to collect Nobody emblems, I get to collect chocolate and caviar. SUCKS TO BE YOU, ROXAS

“Skateboarding is passe now” INCORRECT

Scrooge is just like I RUN THIS TOWN NOW

GET YOU SOME QR CODES SORA

Scrooge: THAT’S CAPITALISM BABEY

If we wish for Roxas with all our hearts and clap our hands HE’LL COME BACK TO LIFE

Ansem: Just look at them…COOKING…PASTRIES…

Another vessel? Don’t you guys already have like fourteen??

I just realized: are the loading screens just. KH Instagram

OKAY IMMA GONNA COOK WITH THE RAT NOW

I AM NOT GOOD AT THE COOKING BUT I LIKE DOING IT

Okay, I THIIIINK the thing to do now is head on to the next world!…

YES YES YES KAIRI’S HERE

REDHEAD SQUAD PLZ

REMEMBERING XION SOB

The Twilight Town trio ice cream music ohhh noooo

just pulls the damn ice cream out of his back pockets IT’S FINE

ooooooo nooooo

OH NO HE CRYIN

Lea: I’m not crying there’s just extra testosterone leaking out of my eyeballs

LEA WHAT we just got used to Lea now back to Axel MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MIND

Riku and Mickey doing more investigatin’

Eeeeeexposition time~

FINALLY PUT THE PIECES TOGETHER, MICKEY

GAH DAMN THEY FINALLY FIGURED OUT THE DEAL WITH TERRA

Well thank goodness these two finally got a case of the Smarts

Okay okay okay! FINALLY CAN GO TO NEW DISNEY WORLDS

It looks like Toy Story is the better choice so I’ll do that first!

After I snag hidden mickeys in Olympustown, anyway!

Okay, those are all the ones I could remember for now, guess we’ll move on to advance the story!

Yikes I absolutely stumbled into a gummi boss battle that I was not ready for

I am so so so bad at the gummi missions in this game, sheesh

BUT IN ANY CASE I FINALLY GOT TO TOY STORY WORLD YAAAAY

OMG is this the game that Rex thinks Sora is from

so fukkin Squeenix

LIL TOY HEARTLESS

Oh wow the music here is so fun

FINALLY GOT FRECKIN AERIAL RECOVERY

Watch out Sora you gonna get laser’d

Sora: I am not Noctis but I know it’s easy to get confused

I love how all this nonsense is basically in canon in the Toy Story universe, thank you Squeenix

Oh wait the humans are missing too that’s a problem

DID THEY GO AND MAKE A XEHANORT ACTION FIGURE TOO

I thought he was just regular size

Guess Al’s Toy Barn went under

Buzz is so dang suspicious

DANGIT we ALMOST had parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme outside the house here!

That is a honkin huge toy store WTF

HIIII Youngnort

BEAT UP THE ROBOTS

Okay this is a pretty fun take on Shrouding Dark Cloud

“Oh that’s right, you’re from a video game, where the rules are BULLSHIT”

Buzz is being such a stick

EXCUSE U but before we rescue our friends I need to find various selfie spots/weird rocks/groceries

sheesh I don’t even care if using Antiform ends up being bad it’s so much fun to do

Oh no I forgot to take out the security cameras, WE’RE DOOMED

OMG if you hit a helium can it makes Sora’s voice all squeaky I CANNOT B E L I E V E

All these bigass dragon toys have me like 

VALIDATE REX’S FEELINGS GUYS

I popped out of Antiform for the cutscene and then popped back into it??

THEY HAVE THE BATTLESAURS FROM THAT ONE TOY STORY SHORT

Why are there such nice dolls in Babies and Toddlers?? You don’t give dolls this nice to babies!

Everybody’s playin’ his theme song!

Corporal: I can’t believe…I got tuba’d…

OH I don’t like that, NO SIR

Yes just give this horrible doll to your baby, that’s fine

FINALLY high jump!!

Sora never say never on horrible things like that!!

The claaaaaaaww

WE HAVE DEFEATED THE CLAW

“Nirvana will not be reached” o o p s

Oh gosh what is this game where I’m stacking flans…

The video game section is just labeled 999999999 FLOWEY I KNOW YOU’RE HERE

Sora: Actually I think this is Riku on the cover

YOU. ARE. A. VIDEO GAAAAAME

Oh Rex I wish they still made strategy guides :(

Ohh I knew the bad thing that they mentioned would happen would happen!

Okay I wanna play Space Cats tho

THE HECK JUST HAPPENED

No Sora you are the videogaems

Well that took way too long but I ended up beating KING ROBOT in antiform

Wreck-it Ralph summon!! YAAAAY

I can’t believe that Buzz Lightyear got Norted

At last, we’ve reached baby jail

This isn’t a friggin toy store it’s Discovery Zone!

We just fuggin cactaur’d our way up here

AT LAST, SORA GETS TO SPEND AN EXTRA HOUR IN THE BALL PIT

Oh well this looks like a boss battle spot

Now we’re in what? Lego hell??

Woody: So you were never loved as a child, were ya

OHOHOHO

HE JUST HOOKSHOTTED THAT BITCH WITH HIS PULLSTRING

These are things you already knew Youngnort!!

That was an appropriately epic battle music for DEFEAT UFO TOY IN TOYSPACE

Awwwwuuh

You’re really not, Donald

Awwww FRIENDS ALL AROUND

Okay we have! Finished that world! And YAAAY new Keyblade!!

~~The Perfect Body~~

WELL WE GOTTA FIND SOMETHING TO STICK THAT HEART IN

OF COURSE RIKU WOULD THINK OF THAT

It’s cloning, Riku, it’s basically cloning.

Sora: CLONES! GREAT, BRILLIANT

Oh okay thank goodness they’re actually KEEPING EACH OTHER UPDATED SOMETIMES

OKAY I think I’m going to need to stop here because I’m starting to go crosseyed and my thumbs are sore

WE’LL MOVE ON TO THE NEXT WORLD TOMORROW

HOT DANG

[lynxgriffin]

The boys are back in town

KH3 commentary continues! We’re getting closer to the end now!! Under the cut for spoilers!

WHELP OKAY as we approach the ending sooner and sooner WE CONTINUE ONWARD

TO SAN FRANSOKYO

I’m excited for this world because I looove BH6 BUT I’M ALSO NERVOUS

HEEEEERE WE GO

Cosmopolitan??

Sora: EVERYTHING’S SO SHINY AND COOL :DDD

I love everything on this world so far

OH LAWD HE COMIN’

I love…Baymax…

Wasabi: Damn fake news!

Excuse U I think we beat them pretty good

Sora: Look Fred I’ve seen and been actual monsters I’d totally buy you were one

Sora YOU DORKUS

Never tell me the odds!

NO LET THE CUTE BOYS AND GALS HELP

Tadashi :((((

Sora: I dunno, that sounds suspiciously computers

MORE MINIGAMES

Probably didn’t do that obstacle course great, but oh well, managed it

Gogo all WHEN DO I LEARN TO RUN UP BUILDINGS

It’s magic, Gogo, it’s just magic

And then they all learned from Sora’s example of BE OP AND KICK ASS

STITCH SUMMON

Now we’re all 20% cooler

Man an actual news report treating a Heartless invasion like it actually would appear

Whole lotta fighting on the side of buildings here!

HEARTLESS KAIJU

Well that was a fun boss battle there

TIME TO LEARN TO FIST BUMP SORA

ba-lalalaa

Oh no now everything’s sweet and perfect HOW LONG CAN THIS LAST

OH NOOO

*clutches chest*

Oh well that ain’t good

Slooooow headtilt

Ummm I can’t target this scary moving block of pixels thing

THIS CITY IS TOO DANG BIG FOR MY TEENY TINY BRAIN

SHEESH OKAY finally got everyone for that, that took awhile

OH NO WHO’S THIS

Whooooo isssss iiiiit

DATAKU? OR REPLIKU?

Seems like it should be Dataku what with…the theming here

Sora come on that wasn’t Riku he didn’t have the right haircut

Man that’s the kinda boss battle that’s gonna hurt a person’s eyes

Sora: Are we seriously still on that kick again??

THIS IS GETTING CONFUSING

Okay seriously, is this Dataku, Repliku or Pastku?? I’M NOT QUITE FOLLOWING YET

Sora: Seriously guys this is total BS

OH NO WE’LL HAVE TO FIGHT BAYMAX 1.0 WON’T WE

OH HI Pete and Maleficent we haven’t seen you in awhile

Is Somebodykunort finally recognizing the fact that they’re maybe someone to follow

WELL SOMEBODY TELL ME FROM WHEN BECAUSE I’D LIKE TO KNOW

Fred is so genre-savvy

Okay those are definitely the blox things from Re:Coded

YUP I WAS RIGHT IT’S EVIL BAYMAX

DARKMAX

Oh I don’t like at all where this is going

I like his scary cube claw tho

Well that was appropriately epic

Just put another good chip in him??

Or not :( Sob poor Hiro

Uuuugh just that offscreen CRUNCH

OH WE DID FIX HIM

NOW THERE’S DOUBLE BAYMAX

WOW WE’RE DONE that was a heck of a deal

I’M KIND OF NERVOUS ABOUT WHATEVER’S NEXT

Oh that is bad news

Oh of course Sora’s gonna run off to realm of darkness THIS WON’T END BADLY AT ALL

LET’S JUST JUMP INTO THE GATE WHERE WE DON’T KNOW IT GOES IT’S FINE

HEY IT’S OUR HOME

*gasps* MASTER KEEPER

SORA WRONG TAKE DONALD AND GOOFY WITH YOU

EVERY TIME YOU DO THIS

TERRIBLE THINGS HAPPEN

YOU WILL NOT BE FINE YOU DUMB CHILD TAKE YOUR GUARDIANS WITH YOU

*tears out hair* jdsakldjal they NEVER LEARN

OH NO IT’S DARKQUA ISN’T IT

Well time to wreck Mickey’s shit absolutely I guess

“GREAT NOW I HAVE GUILT”

OH. OH HI REPLIKU

Oh damn here we go

Sora: HEY GUYS WHAT’S HAPPENI—ohhh

OMG IT’S THAT KEYBLADE

The power to explode everything

LMAO Aqua just zipping over the water like that

Oooof okay okay okay now it’s a proper versus Aqua battle, this is gonna be a toughie

Well that was indeed challenging but we managed it!

Aqua noooooooooo COME BACK TO US QUEEN

TAKE MY HAND I’M A STRANGER IN PARADISE

Yessss aaaaaaaaa

OH NO SOB

WE SAVED THE QUEEN

WE DID IT

SHE SO RELIEVED TO NOT BE IN HELL ANYMORE

Wow okay, back at Radiant Garden

Benched Nort Buddies

Demyx: Backstabbing sounds like a lot of work actually :/

REALLY, Vexen? You’re doing the actual backstabby for atonement??

Xehaort this is what you get for splitting your soul 13 ways, you never agree on anything ever again

DID YOU REALLY JUST SAY DEMYX TIME? DID YOU??

IDK about that in this universe you probably could grow bodies on a body tree

Ienzo: TF is happening here

IT’S SURROGATE DAD

OH NO IENZO. OH NO :(((

*clutches chest* They reconcile…

ARE WE REALLY GETTING TO WAKE UP VEN NOW??

Aqua please don’t blame yourself, you were in hell

Castle Oblivion lookin’ good anyway

THAT WAS REALLY FUKKIN COOL

OMG I’m so happy…I love Land of Departure…

THERE HE IS

THERE’S THE BOY

Ohhhhhh noooooooo

The OTHER The Boy

Venty-Wenty, seriously??

PLAY AS THE QUEEN, PLAY AS THE QUEEN

THE POWER OF THE QUEEN COMPELS YOU

Sora: Can we get to the helping part now??

C’MON VEN WAKEY WAKEY EGGS AND BAKEY

It was in you aaaaaaall along

Lie down / Try not to cry / Cry a lot

SUNSHINE BOY IS HERE

FUCK YEAH

HE’S HERE THE SUNSHINE BOY IS HERE

And Vanyeetas just nopes out of there

Yes they are realizing all the things!!

*flails* ThE GOOD BOYS!!! ARE FRIENDS

Man yeah this is seven now, isn’t it

Reunite all the families!

I love…everyone…

Aqua: It’s okay you don’t remember you were like four years old

Aqua all like I’M FINDING ALL THESE CHILDREN I HELPED OUT I’M SO PROUD OF YOU ALL

Please let them girl bond now

Lea: Will y’all start paying attention to me now

Lea: THIS IS AN INSANE AMOUNT TO GET MEMORIZED   —YEAH NO SHIT

I’m just 100% full of delight at this bullshit

WE’LL JUST HAVE TO FIND EVERYONE ELSE

YES COUNT DONALD AND GOOFY

HO BOY that sounds like an indication to run around and do what’s needed before we jump into the start of endgame stuff

VEN…YOU ARE SO GOOD…

M E A N W H I L E

Pete: Please…stop making me dig up everything…

What’s in the booooooox

Oh Lea…still needs his two friends back :(

OHAI SAIX

Hey you took Xion’s ice cream

Man that must’ve been a hell of a week

Lea: I don’t need dumb tattoos anyway I CAN CRY ALL I WANT

I’m kind of worried about some things mentioned here tho

Man this is just cutscene city ain’t it

Hi again Repliku!

Riku: Don’t talk to me or my edgy son ever again

Get it, time to himself, HURR HURR

PAOPU FRUIT TIME??

LET THE KAIRI FIGHT PLZ

OKAY SO. I suspect this is my chance to go around and do stuff before things totally go to shit!

So that’s what I’m gonna do next! Level up, find lucky emblems, cook rat food, all that goodness

MORE COMMENTARY WILL BE…AT SOME POINT

[lynxgriffin]

Here Comes The Sun

It’s already time for more KH3 commentary! Under the cut for anyone who wants to avoid spoilers!

All right! It’s time to move on down to Tangledtown, it looks like!

There were some terrible gummi ship messes in the way, let’s see if I can manage to get past them

Still suck at gummi missions but at least I can survive them after like…a try or two

And heck yeah we’re off to Tangledtown!! I mean Corona

Honestly the ultimate video game challenge will be rendering this super long hair

Sora: Why are we here? Who cares, it’s pretty!!

OMG Flynn

Once again, beautiful music here! And yaaay learned Aero!

Sora you giant dingleberry

Ugh this world is so dang pretty

Pretty much repeats of the movie so far

Flynn: I’m thinking exposition to myself!

You’re not quite nailing The Smoulder there, Flynn

There’s eel in this here river!

Ugh I found a lucky emblem but I can’t find a good spot to photograph it from!

Sora: First time outdoors?? Yikes…that’s dark

It’s okay Rapunzel, you got the order right, everything’s fine

That’s the fluffiest Heartless in existence

Okay heck yeah that was a fun battle type deal!

HIIIIII MAR MAR

Did Norted Marluxia just Mar Mother Gothel? HOW MANY LAYERS DOES THIS GO

Dandelions! WE FOUND ALL OF AVA’S KIDS

I think my fav attraction flows so far are the carousel and rapids ride

We have obtained: BUNNY TREASURE

You can make Sora splash in the water sooob

Oh we had Heartless flowers and now Nobody flowers!

I like how everybody’s like “Flowers? SUSPICIOUS!!!”

Gotta say that Mar’s lesser Nobodies are pretty kickass, tho

HAS-BEENS

HERE COMES THE SORA SASS

Aww Mar doesn’t want to remember getting his ass handed to him —I’m not counting data battles argh—

Well Mar that’s…not quite true honestly

Mar: And when I say “use the Keyblade to keep her safe” I mean “LOCK HER IN THE TOWER HURR HURR”

Oooh now getting into the spooky forest

Goofy: Well let’s use proper names for the terrible villain!

Sora: Well excuuuuuuuse me, evil stepmother

CALL YOUR MOM, SORA

Oh hey we finally found Maximus!

WE HAVE HORSEY SEAL OF APPROVAL

the flap-flaps are back!!

Pfff this Heartless monkey all like “EAT MY ASS, I HAVE A SIEGE TOWER”

Oh gosh this Heartless

SUPERJUMP??

I must give Rapunzel this halo of birds

I gotta agree, I think this is the prettiest world so far

I’M TAKIN ALL YOUR FRESH FRUIT AND VEGETABLES NOW

Don’t mind me, just swimming in your water digging for shellfish

WTF the dancing part was so ridiculously cute I can’t

Funny I don’t remember them actually having the satchel at this point?

Sora: EXCUSE U FOR NOT APPRECIATING THIS MOMENT

Must’ve told her that his name was Eugene while Sora and co were out

LMAO Marmar that was the most flat delivery of that line

LOL sure Mother Gothel just beat those giant Nobodies to death with a stick

SHE DISCOVERED THE POWER OF STICKBLADE

Damn they pulling up the chess metaphor again

No one told the other Princesses that their job was finished!

Oh wow so apparently Mar can just! Do that??

I do love that moment with the sun symbol tho

Mother Gothel: I’m extra the bad guy now because of the dark darkness smoke

Oh geez they’ve been there all night

He was awakened by the kiss of true horse

Maximus: I CAN CARRY FOUR PEOPLE IT’S FINE

STABB’D

Sora: Just let me get there I’ve got a cure spell!

AND THIS WHOLE SCENE

Marluxia, please, put any emotions at all into your voice

Oh now THAT’S a freaky-ass Heartless, nice nice

That was a pretty kickass boss battle, gotta say

Sora: WTF people can’t actually die that’s not allowed!

Sora: Told you sooooo

WHELP WE DID IT WE PLAYED THE MOVIE

Donald: “Rapunzel’s the tough one actually” HE’S NOT WRONG

Sora: EXCUSE U if I matchmake THEN I GET IN ON THE SECRETS

So yay! Finished that world! Will have to give this Keyblade a try, but I do really like the Toy Story one

Pete: WE KEEP GETTING SHAFTED

It’s Etch-A-Sketch’d

Please please let Maleficent and Pete end up being the monkey wrench in the Organization’s whole plan just because no one thought to notice what they were doing

Let Aeleus have a line!!

Oh well this looks ominous

HI SAIX

Even: Humanity is for CHUMPS

Vexen: Friendship ended with Basic Decency, GETTING NORTED is my new BFF

Oooh oh oh new worlds to choose from!!

Looks like the next spot we’re going is MONSTERS INC, YAAAY I’M EXCITE

But I’ll talk about that in the next commentary post, so this is already getting a bit long!

More very soon!!

[lynxgriffin]

Out you pixies go, through the door or out the window

What’s that? More commentary during my KH3 playthrough? Of course, that’s pretty much all we’re doin’ this week! Under the cut for those who don’t want spoilers!

Me: OH yay, I got to this world without having to do a gummi battle! (Boss Appears) Ahh NVM

Here we go here we go LET’S BE A FUZZY KITTY MONSTER

THE HEEBIE JEEBIES

Sora did you not notice you just weren’t wearing any pants

KITTY. FACE

Oh I guess he became CEO while we weren’t looking!

THE BLUE WAZOWSKI

Oh no, it’s cuuute

AHAHAHA UNVERSED

…That they do not know are Unversed

I’m so happy to be here because I love Sulley…

OH YEAH DONALD AND GOOFY SHOULD REMEMBER THIS THANK YOU FOR THAT

Sora constantly fails at the “world order” business

Does this imply we could power the gummi ship by screams but it just wouldn’t go well

WE’RE GONNA MAKE IT AFTER ALLLL

oh hey there Randall

Okay, the door sliding stuff was pretty badass

Ahahaha finished that off with the bowling Mike Wazowski deal

Admiral Ackbar voice: IT’S A TRAP

Aim high, Randall

Did…did Vanitas go to hillbilly trailer park to help out Randall

LASER’D

Oh they’re Lisa Frank edition now!

Okay Randall I know we’re in the middle of this death maze and all BUT I NEED TO STOP AND LEARN HOW TO CRACK AN EGG HERE

OR USE SALT AND PEPPER SHAKERS

Boo: I do what I waaaant

Revenge is sweet, but not as sweet as this cheese I just found at the bottom of a take-out container, Randall

Sora don’t you remember that you don’t computer good??

Man I hope Roz shows up

Sora: BUT I WANNA SMASH COMPUTER

Sora: Please explain the joke to me

OHGOD HERE IT COMES

HERE IT IS

I cannot believe we got that kind of callback

Randall: Why won’t weird scary machines do my bidding??

VANITAS ARE YOU STILL WEARING THE MASK UNDER THE HOOD YOU GIANT DOOFUS

WhoTF set the factory on fire

Watera will, in fact, be useful in this situation!

Ahhh I got Simba summon YAAAAY

DRAMAtIC EXPLOSIOOOONS

Boo is the MVP here, honestly

Honestly this is pretty intimate knowledge for a CEO to have

Vanitas in league with the black oil aliens now, I see

Mike do not approach the spooky oily leaky death machine thingie

M E G A W E A P O N

Seriously Vanitas, the hell negative emotion was that supposed to be, nausea?

Randall gave in easily, but I guess he is a noodly nerd

Sora: HAHA I just locked him in the hillbilly trailer park

VANITAS TAKE OFF THE MASK YOU DUM DUM

OMG HJO you are just having a ball being a dingus here aren’t you

Vanitas: TIME TO EXPOSIT

Sora: GAH DAMN how many heart hotel rooms did I rent out??!

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAA

OMFG

HE JUST FUKKIN YEETED VANITAS OUT THE WORLD I C A N N O T

IM DYING

I don’t even care how the rest of the game goes, it was worth the price of admission just for Sulley picking up Vanitas like a sleeping bag and fastball hurling him through a door into whereverthehell

Sora: Well yanno I could have died and/or gotten force joined with my evil twin BUT IT TURNED OUT FINE LET’S PLAY WITH THE CUTE TODDLER

OMG Sora at least tell Riku and Mickey about the Ventus thing!!

HE SCREAM

Sora: I RENTED OUT THREE HEART HOTEL ROOMS???

Ienzo: Good luck with that whole multiple hearts in you thing, byyyyeeee

*bangs fists on table* REMEMBER! XION! REMEMBER! XION!

THE QUEEN!!!!

SHE IS HERE

Uh ohhhh

No seriously which girl, are we talking about Namine, Xion, WHOOOO

Aqua seriously where IS your Keyblade??

OH NO THE QUEEN

*points* But that is NOT the same thing as Norting, I KNEW IT

Goofy: It’s okay I can decipher weird chipmunk nonsense!

Whelp I guess we’ll stop by Twilight Town anyway and do any postcards/Bistro stuff we need to

IMMA GONNA GO COOOOOOK ohai Merlin

YAAAY WINNIE THE POOH

Go put every character into your giant pockets right now

Oh good they didn’t forget him this time

OMG IT’S LUMPY

Oh no I’m overwhelmed with warm fuzzies

Well I’m honestly not sure how that minigame worked, but whatever, I did it and I got GROCERIES

WHIPPERSNAPPERS AND THEIR BOUNCING

Pooh: Hey Rabbit, when do we get to the honey part, HINT HINT

So this has basically been the same minigame three times in a row, but the song is lovely so I can’t complain…

Help I’ve been overcome with Enchantment

*clutches chest* MY HEEEEART

He’s back on the cover!

ARE YOU GONNA ELABORATE ON THAT LITTLE STAB TO THE HEART THERE OR NOT, GAME

OH FINE JUST TWIST THE KNIFE WITH THAT FORESHADOWING

Okay, I think I’ve done all I can in TT for now, so I think I’ll get established in the next world here and then stop!

Oh okay, note to self, you actually DO need to open the dang prize spheres so you can use better gummi blocks

And now we’re in Frozenland!

GIVE THE POOR BOY A COAT

Sora: Sad girl?? Must fix!!

In any case! That’s fixing we’re gonna need to do tomorrow, since here’s a place to stop

MORE ON THAT SOON