#Don't know much about her other then her popular songs and I guess that one thing?

[lila-kriegerin]

OMG, OP!

I was just about to suggest "Now & Then "

but I saw it in your tags.

I'm so sorry this may look like an unhinged rant no one asked for, but someone has to tell people younger than me what I know, so I spent 2 hours crafting a reply/follow-up/addendum to you post, OP. Please forgive any formatting errors. I tried to keep things simple and engaging but a few things may look a little bit odd depending on what sort of device you're viewing it on. I couldn't take the risk of making all the text too small

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQLVzTtt2Ws

The biggest problem trying to find similar films is that they often involve at least two of the girls having some kind of relationship to boys causing drama (I'm looking at you, "Sisterhood Of The Travelling Pants "... and others) whereas a film like "Dead Poets Society " is definitely in that pseudo-homoerotic and explicitly homoerotic range of storytelling.

Why do you think "Little Women" was popular for so long? It was the 1oth century literary equivalent with the requisite brush with death and loss so common to an era before even antibiotics existed... and loss and grief still happen today.

It's true that so few are like "Newsies " and "West Side Story ", but DON'T sleep on hits like "Annie" &

🥁 drumroll, please 🥁

Want to guess what was the first obviously gay song featured in a film from Hollywood (after the Hayes Code)?

The First Gay Anthem: Calamity Jane's 'Secret Love'

It's not "West Side Story " because it's a western frontier musical, and they skirted the lines as hard as they could to have a nice Christian young woman fancying a "tomboy": Calamity Jane (who by historical record seems to have favoured women and men).

Though based on American Western folklore, this premise clearly imitated the successful 1950 film version of Irving Berlin's Broadway musical Annie Get Your Gun, about Wild West sharpshooter Annie Oakley.

But instead of a make-over, Calamity Jane gives its tough-gal heroine a powerfully symbolic pistol; her masculine aggression plays with sexual identity through gestures enlarged to the point of farce. And then it goes deeper--into emotional confusion that grows from Jane taking on supposed male habits. Doris Day brings comic overstatement to Jane's complex repression of her own instincts. Like many a closet case, she exhibits a self-defeating willingness to fit into a male-dominated culture. Her tough mannerisms are also designed to protect her hidden, vulnerable emotions.

You have to dig.

Dig deep, and be willing to watch a film with a different spoken language and culture, but there are some parallels.

Consider the Britney Spears film, which I believe is called "Crossroad(s)" in English. [Sorry, I don't have time to look up the title.]

Now— what if there were a film that's something a bit like a lesbian equivalent?

Touch

A Chinese movie produced/sponsored by the sapphic dating app Rela. It follows three girls on a road trip. Chinese language with English subtitles.

I've never, EVER seen any website draw direct comparisons to other films that way, such as:

If you loved "She's The Man" but want it more sapphic (though ultimately thwarted by the producer), you can't miss "Bend It Like Beckham"!

The photo which was posted by OP DOES contain valid points!! (No one is going to treat you "like a man/boy" unless they truly think that's what you are, and society DOES socialise people differently, so: how would a group of teenage girls or very young adult women ever have experiences identical to those in a film like "Dead Poet's Society"?)

Nevertheless, there are some similar films that are comparable:

"Superbad" — "Booksmart".

I decided to hyperfocus trying to think up some equivalents to "Dead Poet's Society".

Here's a quick comparison I spent far too much time on:

If you’re looking for a Dead Poets Society equivalent with mostly female characters, a few films capture that same blend of deep emotional intimacy, artistic passion, and repressed desire. Here are the best contenders:

1. Mädchen in Uniform (1931 & 1958)

This is the OG queer boarding school drama. Set in a strict Prussian girls' school, it follows a young student, Manuela, who falls in love with her teacher, Fräulein von Bernburg. The film is explicitly homoerotic in a way that Dead Poets Society is only suggestive of—there’s longing glances, whispered affections, and a stifling environment that tries to crush individuality and desire. Like Neil, Manuela faces tragic consequences for daring to express herself.

Cracks (2009) — If Dead Poets Society were darker and more explicitly about queer desire, it would be Cracks. This film follows a group of girls at a remote British boarding school under the spell of their charismatic teacher, Miss G (Eva Green, in all her seductive, unhinged glory). When a new student arrives, power struggles and hidden obsessions unravel. It has all the repression, poetry, and tragic queerness you could want.

Heavenly Creatures (1994) — Peter Jackson (yes, Lord of the Rings Peter Jackson) directed this feverishly intense drama about two schoolgirls in 1950s New Zealand—Pauline and Juliet—whose bond becomes so consuming that it leads to murder. Like Dead Poets Society, it’s about breaking free from repression, but it takes a much darker turn. The homoerotic tension between the girls is undeniable, and the fantasy world they create as an escape mirrors the way the DPS boys use poetry to carve out their own space in a suffocating environment.

Picnic at Hanging Rock (1975) — This one’s all about atmosphere—a haunting, dreamlike film about a group of girls at an Australian boarding school who mysteriously vanish during a picnic. While there’s no overt romance, the film is full of lingering touches, dreamy stares, and a pervading sense of longing and repression. The rigid Victorian setting and the contrast between the natural world and societal constraints make it feel spiritually connected to DPS.

The Falling (2014) — Starring Florence Pugh and Maisie Williams, this film is weird and hypnotic. It’s set in an all-girls school in the 1960s and follows a mysterious fainting epidemic that spreads through the students. It has the same themes of teenage rebellion, deep female friendships that tip into obsession, and an oppressive institution trying to crush individual expression.

Céline and Julie Go Boating (1974) — This is a more whimsical, surreal take on female friendship and creativity. It follows two women who fall into a bizarre, looping story in a haunted house, constantly re-experiencing and altering the narrative. It has a Dead Poets Society vibe in the sense that it’s about escaping rigid reality through art and imagination, but with a queer-coded, magical twist.

If you want the closest equivalent to "Dead Poets Society"...

..."Mädchen in Uniform" or "Cracks" are your best bets, and Cracks more than Mädchen in Uniform

because the latter is so old fashioned that to further scandalise viewers they paired a teacher with a student.

If you want something more poetic and atmospheric, "Picnic at Hanging Rock" or "The Falling" will scratch that itch.

If all of that is too gay for you (gofuckyourself, tee-hee)

You really, REALLY should try

"Mona Lisa Smile".

(...and if it's not too gay for you, then go watch CRACKS right now!)

"Mona Lisa Smile" [hereafter referred to as MLS] is often called the "Dead Poets Society" [hereafter, DPS] for women, and yeah, it certainly hits a lot of the same beats—

an outsider teacher inspiring students to challenge societal norms,

a prestigious school that values obedience over individuality, and

a group of young people grappling with expectations that threaten to suffocate them.

Where DPS is about breaking free through poetry and self-expression, MLS is about that sort of thing tosome degree, but more about feminism, gender roles, and the fight for intellectual freedom in a world that wants women to be just wives and mothers.

Similarities to Dead Poets Society

The Inspirational Teacher as a Catalyst for Change

In DPS, John Keating (Robin Williams) shakes up Welton Academy’s rigid, tradition-obsessed environment with poetry and passion.

In MLS, Katherine Watson (Julia Roberts) does the same at Wellesley College, using art history to challenge her students’ pre-ordained roles as perfect housewives.

Both teachers are NOT merely instructing— they’re awakening their students, making them see the world differently, and often doing so in ways that put them at odds with their school’s administration.

The Oppressive Institution and Its Ideals

Welton Academy is a suffocating prep school that values discipline over creativity, much like Wellesley College in the 1950s. They outwardly promote academic excellence but ultimately groom women to become ideal wives. (T_T)

Both films show how these institutions uphold deeply ingrained traditions that resist change, even when it's clearly needed.

Both films show some of the human cost of trying, and giving up.

A Group of Students at a Crossroads

Just like Todd, Neil, and the rest of the DPS boys who struggle between expectation and their own desires, the young women in MLS— Joan, Betty, Giselle, and Connie—each navigate their own battles between societal pressure and personal ambition.

Joan (Julia Stiles) mirrors Todd.

Betty (Kirsten Dunst) is like a mix of Cameron and Richard from DPS.

Giselle (Maggie Gyllenhaal) is the Charlie of the group.

The Tragedy of Repression

DPS’s tragedy is clear: someone's dreams are crushed & there is a heartbreaking su*c*de [all the trigger warnings apply]. MLS doesn’t have a singular moment that tragic, but its heartbreak is quieter—seeing some brilliant young women choose societal expectations over their own ambitions because it feels like the only option... that is definitely going to haunt some people more than it may haunt white cis-hetero male viewers.

In both films, someone (one you probably like most of all, in both films) will have something horrible happen to them by their own choice, and that is very haunting.

Additionally, I dont think it's too big a spoiler to say oth films end with the teacher leaving— but to say why would spoil the endings of the films.

The last scenes mirror each other emotionally: in DPS & MLS, a quiet, bittersweet goodbye with both endings suggesting that while the teacher is gone, the ideas they planted will live on.

Key Differences

The Central Conflict

DPS is about breaking free from repression through art and poetry. It’s about passion, self-expression, and the fight for creative freedom.

MLS is about that too, though with more of a (*cough*white*cough*cough*) feminist focus on gender roles, feminism, and intellectual independence to have intellectual and self growth as an individual— and it asks whether women can truly be free when they’re still expected to conform to outdated expectations.

Homoerotic "Sub"text

[be honest: if you miss it in either film you're in denial or unobservent and that is your own journey you need to take]

DPS is filled with homoerotic tension, especially between Todd and Neil. The intimacy between the boys—the longing glances, the whispered poetry, the emotional weight of their friendships—feels deeply charged.

If you DEMAND that level of queerness, MLS ain't it.

MLS has some queer subtext, particularly with [one character], who is coded as more fluid in her sexuality, but the film doesn’t lean into that as much as DPS does because it's focused more on the pseudo-historical narrative from the book upon which it was based.

Don't forget that DPS came out to cinemas...

THEN "The Craft" did,

THEN "Cruel Intentions" did,

THEN MLS.

DPS was intentionally pushing boundaries of censors for queer story-telling when the USA was still afraid for gay people to peck each other with a little kiss on the lips on television before 10 PM.

DPS ends in a tragedy that reinforces the cost of defying the system— [spoilers redacted], and the boys are [narratively] left in a state which leaves the viewers feeling a bittersweet limbo.

MLS is perhaps a bit more hopeful; and although the school seemingly remains unchanged, things in that world have definitely shifted for the characters.

Their worlds aren't fully transformed though for MLS, it’s beginning to open up, but MLS leaves viewers with their own bittersweet limbo like DPS[-lite] with a sliver of a dash of hope.

Final Verdict:

"Mona Lisa Smile" is "Dead Poets Society" through a differing feminist lens.

It swaps poetry for art,

an all-boys school for an all-girls college, and

queer-coded male friendships for female students fighting for their intellectual freedom.

It has the same spirit—

a teacher who inspires students to think for themselves, an oppressive institution trying to maintain order, and young people wrestling with societal expectations.

However, where DPS is a tale of tragic repression, MLS leans toward quiet rebellion— not a fiery "O Captain, My Captain" moment, but a slow, steady push toward change.

just saw this on pinterest and it hit me like a truck

[qstarhalo]

trick or treat!

Trick!! <3

[confessedlyfannish]

Writing Prompt #11

It's an innocent ("please," Jason sneers, "there's nothing innocent about a plagiaristic propaganda machine encouraging minors to dance for sick ol' pervs while it spews misogynistic hate speech.'"

"okay, boomer,"

"the fuck did you just call me, replacement?") TikTok, one of those ones that kind of simmers in the background for a few weeks until someone with a decent enough following posts it on the Platform Formerly Known as Twitter and from there it seriously catches traction, blowing up until Tim knocks on Bruce's office door, phone in hand. Damian stands behind him, arms crossed and clearly simmering.

Bruce, fresh off a series of zoom conferences, raises an eyebrow.

"Okay, so you haven't seen it," Tim decides, striding forward.

Bruce's eyebrow jumps a smidge higher, on the edge of concern, as Tim thrusts his phone into his grasp.

"So," he begins, reaching over to refresh the mobile page "there's a video that's been making the rounds on Twitter and—well you should probably see it," He sighs over Damian's scoff as he clicks through the pop-up asking him to sign in or join TikTok, and presses "Watch Again", unmuting the video.

🎶 "Doo, badoo-badoo-badoo Badoo-badoo-badoo-badoo,"🎶 an upbeat background song hums as someone, presumably a student, films a school hallway with their phone. They walk past students talking near their lockers, some of whom flash peace signs and silly grins as the camera swings their way before continuing on.

But the main point Bruce gets stuck on is the all lowercase white text at the center of the screen that an automated woman's voice awkwardly narrates:

"when you go to school with bruce wayne's other long lost lovechild"

The student filming comes up behind a much taller student who faces away from him, in conversation with a black haired pale teenaged girl. She spots the cameraman and shoots him a confused, disgruntled look, saying something to the boy who then turns around.

Bruce quietly observes as the camera zooms in on a boy around Tim's page, possibly older. Tall and broad-shouldered, with a strong jaw, he raises an eyebrow at the one filming, looking beyond the camera, pitch black hair with blue undertones falling into his blue eyes. The camera momentarily zooms too far into those eyes then abruptly pulls back as he quirks a puzzled smile at the viewer, mouthing out an easily understandable "hi?".

The TikTok ends and seamlessly transitions to a person balancing their cat on an exercise ball with minimal success and this time Bruce presses the Watch Again button. The heart on the right side claims 750k likes.

Damian scoffs, louder, as it ends. "Clearly it is a hoax, but it has been popular among my classmates."

"The board hasn't made much noise about it—" Tim starts.

"And they won't," Bruce says, lifting his eyes from his phone. "Wayne Industries doesn't give statements on videos like these, no matter how viral they become. I've been getting lovechild claims since before I adopted Dick."

Which Tim knows, which is why his insistence on showing Bruce this one raises his hackles. He pins Tim down with a stare and despite Tim's perfected PR mask, he can see Tim is unsettled.

"B...he really, really looks like you." Tim admits. Damian scoffs for a third time and Tim shoots him a glare, "I get it, you don't see it, but you haven't seen the pictures of Bruce when he was younger."

"I don't need to!" Damian says angrily. "You're all being ridiculous!"

"All?" Bruce asks. Tim shifts awkwardly. "The family group chat has been talking," he says.

"I see," Bruce says. Because he does. Many claim Damian to be his doppelganger, but the boy actually favors Talia not just in skin tone but in the shape and color of his eyes, as well as the soft slope of her mouth and ears. Whether those features will sharpen once he goes through puberty is anyone's guess.

But this young man has Bruce's eyes. Martha's eyes.

That night they have a suspiciously full house for dinner, with even Jason dropping in, but no one says anything until Barbara wheels in for dessert, carrying a manila folder on her lap.

"What?" she says, when everyone stares. "Dick told me it was crème brûlée today!"

Bruce extends a hand wordlessly, and Barbara sheepishly hands the folder over.

"Bruce," she says, before he can open it, "I wouldn't have looked into this normally, but,"

"Just say it," Jason says, leaning back in his chair. "Take away the gray hairs, the receding hairline, and the wrinkles and the kid's a dead match."

"Take it back, Todd," Damian growls, "Father has a very full head of hair!"

"Not to mention a failed track record at keeping it in his pants, Exhibit A," Jason continues, pointing a fork at Damian, "oh wait," he says gleefully, "kid is definitely 18, so I guess that would make you Exhibit B!"

The table erupts, cutlery tinkling as Damian gets a knee up on the table to hurl himself at a cackling Todd, Dick jumping up to grab him as the others lean out of the way—

"Ahem!" Everyone stops cold as Alfred stands in the doorway, porcelain ramekins of crème brûlée stacked perfectly on a silver tray. Under his gaze, everyone sits back down, Damian and Jason both quietly uttering a "Sorry Alfie/Alfred," as they straighten up.

Bruce is oblivious to the chaos, Barbara biting her lip beside him as he stares blankly inside the folder at the printed copy of an adoption certificate.

Two days and several million likes later, another TikTok goes viral from the same user. Caught in the moment as whoever is filming runs up to the group, the same young man is chatting with a blonde in a red letterman jacket, a partially formed crowd around them. Even with one leg still in the cafeteria table, he towers over everyone.

"—sh. Look, we're all possibly Bruce Wayne's son!" the boy snarks. He has his hands out, palms up as if he's making a great point, and as he looks around he catches sight of the cameraman and his smirk drops.

"Ah Mac, c'mon dude not again—" and the TikTok ends.

[grahstumhurts]

2. Putting it into gear

Cheerleader!Megan x Loser Band Member!Reader

A/N Not proof read lol so it might have some weird wording and shit.

Rekindling Masterlist

The late May air is starting to feel slightly humid and hot as it usually does by this time, Megan's waiting outside. Leaning on the side of the school fence looking effortlessly beautiful as she does.

“Hey” you greet her, “What did you need to talk about?” She looks up from her phone, then looks around behind you to see if people are watching.

“Look, I owe you an apology and-” 

“That's an understatement.” You cut her off. “Two years of ignoring me should get me something better than an apology”

“Just hear me out” 

She looks you in the eyes, Her pupils glistening with the caramelised apple colour it's always been.

“Please,” 

“Fine” You cross your arms in anticipation “You gonna tell me or what?”

“I need to fake date you, for friendship reasons I guess.” Obviously that stuns you, A girl you had a crush on for the past ten years of your life is suddenly asking you to fake date her. 

“What?” Your face contorts in a mix of surprise and confusion “Why me?”

“You're the only gay person I know, I’m trying to come out to them and they won't believe me till I date someone who fits their “Gay” vision” She sighs, her face portrays her obviously conflicted emotions. “Look its okay if you won't do it, You don't owe me anything especially since i abandoned you but at least sleep on it for me.”

She pauses, trying to read your face, noticing the slight differences in your eyes.

“I also needed to say sorry, I wasn't there when I promised I would be.” 

“I wont accept your apology for now, you need to earn my trust back, Megan.”

 You sigh at the dilemma, do you chose to help her with her fake dating thing, or do you leave her behind. 

“I’ll help you under one condition, We will stay friends afterwards.” 

You expect her to say no, the wavering tone in your voice saying so.

“Thank you so much, seriously I appreciate this. I owe you, N/n” She hugs you, Her scent lingering of fresh citrus and light berries. Her arms wrap around your waist, you instinctively wrap your arms around her shoulders.

“We need to figure out a plan for this whole situation.” You comment as you two break the hug, still feeling the lingering warmth of her. 

“Are you free this week to meet up?” 

“Tuesdays and Thursdays I meet up with my band, any other day we can meet up after school.”

“How about wednesday? I have practice, can you come watch and we can go somewhere after?” The thought of her friends seeing you makes your skin crawl as your reputation with these “Popular” people is not exactly great. Considering that you and Lara are the ones who stand up to Greg when he feels the need to degrade Yoonchae. You may or may not have gotten into some physical altercations with said Greg. 

“Sure, It’ll sell the idea that we are dating a bit more,” It’s a trade off that is worth it to make Megan happy. You shrug just as her phone rings, Her ringtone was not the same as the one you had remembered her to have. It had been her favourite song, Perfect Lover by Britney Spears. But now it's one of those default ones, Removing some of the personality from her.

“Yeah?"

"Oh, Okay."

"I’ll see you soon, Mom. Love you bye”

You can vaguely hear her moms voice throughout the quick phone call, her familiar tone isn't something you can forget easily. 

“You gotta go I assume?” you pick at your nails, “I can walk you home if you want?” You look up to her, trying to gauge her reaction through her body language. “Unless you dont want me to.. You know what forget i even said-”

“NO!” She suddenly cuts you off mid sentence “I mean, No” She clears her throat repeating her affirmation in a softer tone, “it’d be nice for my mom to see you again, She used to ask me about you all the time.” She presses her lips into a line, her face covered with embarrassment. 

“Lead the way,” You slightly smile at the thought that her mom still wondered where you had been all this time, She starts walking in the direction of her house. Making small talk to catch up on each others lives during the two years of absence, Your hands brushing together as you walk on the pavement.

“I missed you, you know that right?”

The smallness in her voice juxtaposes her usually large demeanour.

“I hoped you did,”

You chuckle slightly,

“I missed you too.”

“This is me,” she stops in front of the house you used to know, “You wanna stay for dinner? I mean you don't have to or anything.”

“Sure, It’ll be nice to say hi to your mom.” She leads you into her house, The recognisable scent of her moms cooking wafting into your nostrils. Filling your senses with memories of years prior. “Do we have to fake date in front of your mom aswell?” You tease her, Slipping off your shoes.

“Yeah, I guess so..” She replies nervously, just as her Mom wraps around the corner from the kitchen. “Hey, I brought home a special someone.” 

“Oh my gosh, YN! I didn't realise you were coming tonight for dinner.” She embraces you in a warm hug. “Feels like I haven't seen you in forever.” She lightly jabs at Megan with her elbow. 

“Just been busy with school work and college applications, you know how it is.” You lightly giggle at Megan’s mom’s actions. “Glad to see you Mrs. Skiendiel”

“Oh please, Yn. You know not to call me that, Just aunty is okay.” 

-

“Wow aunty, this is seriously delicious.” You moan as you wolf down the rice and pork on your plate. “I'm grateful that your cooking skills haven't deteriorated in the period I haven't seen you” You say in between bites.

“Im happy you like it, feel free to come over and eat when you want to, Honey” She chuckles

“Uhm Mom, We have something to talk about with you.” Megan’s words shift the energy at the table. You swallow your latest bite and glance at Megan, Giving her a reassuring look. 

“You guys are dating? I know, it's not that much of a shock.” Aunty takes the words out of Megan's mouth, “I've been patiently waiting when you two would realise your feelings for eachother. I have a standing bet with your mom, Yn.” She matter-a-factly comments,

“No funny business in my house alright?” 

“Yes aunty, I don't plan on doing anything with Megan till she's ready. Don't worry”

You try to clear the air quickly, Megan grabs your hand on the table. Interlocking her fingers with your ring clad ones, The slightly cold metal meeting her warm skin. The embarrassment of your words settling in with the two of you.

“I wouldn't dare hurt Megan, I hope you know that aunty.” You stupidly grin at her.

“I know, Yn. Just double checking, I know how you teenagers can be.” She lets out a deep sigh of relaxation. “I have some work to do. all I need you guys to do is the dishes, can you two handle that?” She squints her eyes at us, 

“Yeah, dont worry about it, Mom.” Megan stands and starts clearing the plates from the table, You follow her actions grabbing plates and silverware and bringing them to the sink in the kitchen. 

“I’ll be in the office working if you need me, Good night you two.” Megan’s Mom announces before the door closes.

“Oh my god i swear that was the most awkward i've been with your mom in forever.” You let out a deep sigh as you lean against the kitchen counter, Megan places down the rest of the dishes.

“Yeah no that was really awkward.” She giggles “Yes aunty i don't plan on doing anything with Megan till she's ready” She mockingly says in your tone of voice. You shove her shoulder lightly. 

“Come on lets finish the dishes, I rinse, you dry?” You stand over the sink, turn on the sink and scrub the dinner plates with a soapy sponge.

“Mhm, sounds like a solid plan” She hums, picking up the drying towel from the towel rack as you start to hand her some rinsed dishes. You cheekily smile to yourself as you get a devious idea. Megan is suddenly met with a warm splash of water from the sink head

“You did not just do that” She looks at you astonished, Mouth agape. “You little shit, Yn” 

“Such hurtful words require punishment” You giggle as you spray her with more water,

“What the fuck!” She squeals, feeling the water soak her shirt, “that's not fair, i don't have a sink to spray you too.” Suddenly it seems as Megan gets an idea for your payback.

“Come here, YN. Give me, your girlfriend, A hug. why don't you?” 

“No! I'm not gonna hug you, Meg. You gotta catch me first.” She roars with laughter as she chases after you in the kitchen. 

“Im gonna get you!” She loudly shouts, Running you into the corner of the kitchen.

“I’ve got you trapped now don't i?” She pants.

“I guess so, And what are you gonna do about it?”

You tease her, She pulls you into a wet hug “Eughhhh, it's so cold” You groan feeling her damp top spread the water on your shirt. She pulls away, Snickering at the sight of your now also damp shirt, 

“You get what's coming for you.”

“Can i atleast borrow a shirt or something?” You pull your shirt away from your chest to unstick it from your skin.

“Yeah, Come on. Let's go upstairs and dry off.” She grasps her hand with yours, Her nails graze your wrist. She drags you up the stairs into her room. You stare in awe, It looks similar to when you were last here but different at the same time.

“You took down the BTS posters?” You take a glance at her as she rummages through her closet for two shirts.

“Figured it was time to grow up i guess” She sighs and pulls out the shirts. 

“You sure it wasnt just your new friends pressuring you? Not that it really matters honestly, just curious.”

“Yes its fine, seriously, YN. I dont get whats your problem is right now, they were just posters.” She throws a purple oversized shirt at you.

“Just asking, No offence and all that” You exhale deeply, “Should i go to the bathroom and change or?” She just nods and you take that as your sign to leave the room.

You reenter the room and she's laying on her bed, Phone in hand. You knock on the door frame, she glances up then pats the side of the bed for you to sit down.

“Sorry by the way. Its not really my place to ask those types of questions.” You sit on the end of her bed.

“Its okay, I'm sorry too by the way. I overreacted a tad.” You observe as she hesitates to interlock hands, You take action as you interlock your pinkies together. 

"I guess i realized how much you've changed. And i guess i wasn't ready to fully realize it." You lay next to her, Brushing shoulders.

[wolfythewitch]

Hiui it is 8am and I'm on the zcholl bus and my broam has not shut up about them

There's a lot of discourse about the achilles portrayal in the song of achilles which I agree with for the most part because the sanitization I feel erases the suffering of women and slaves the period was built on by minimizing the raping and violent nature of war hero achilles that Homer wrote - - however, I don't think tsoa ought to be read as a stand alone; tsoa is entirely written from patroclus' pov and I think that idealisation of the man is brilliant because of how grossly codependent they were

I think I really liked one redditors take on it, being [in context of 'the silence of girls'; a breseis pov of the iliad, where in achilles participated in the culture which used her as a bed slave of war] The tsoa protector achilles which defended women who mattered to him and was endlessly devoted, and the achilles that was complacent in the ritualistic abuse of the women he enslaved by pillaging their homes are both coexisting, and possibly one and the same

I personally view the Greek cast as sort of vocaloids, they're tools by which we understand the culture of the ancients, the way we envision their interactions is just a means for our practicing the pragmatics of how we come to understand the period

Okay frankly I'm not the best person to discuss this because I've only read like half of tsoa, but there's two disagreements I have I guess, based on what I Have read

One, as much it's not meant to be a standalone or something like that (to me, it is meant to be a standalone), because of its popularity in contemporary media it is being taken as one, and many people will have Achilles and Patroclus' image forever frozen as tsoa' portrayal. God knows how many comments I've gotten on my videos treating tsoa as fact. I can't really blame the author for that, but it is what it is.

Two, the idealization of man through patroclus' eyes would hold more weight if himself was not changed for the narrative either. Patroclus was a soldier, he was a healer, and he also had his fair share of women (who he slept with). Both of them did. Violence was not shied from, and slave women were war prizes. There are these insidious little rewrites throughout the story to further the narrative of Achilles and Patroclus' only loving each other, and in turn erasing what they've done to the other women in the story. (Taking in slave women because they wanted to save them is. A choice.) Deidamia in the myths, they range from at best her and Achilles falling in love to the point of intimacy, and at worst Achilles raping her. In tsoa, Thetis forced Achilles to sleep with her. Deidamia also forced Patroclus to sleep with her. That flip in the narrative is kind of fucked up, seeing as how both in the myths and in tsoa Peleus raped Thetis.

Trying to make a statement that it is written through the idealized eyes of man, well it doesn't really work here. If anything, it feels more like an author writing with the intent of not having her MCs be morally reprehensible. So Patroclus cares when the plot demands it (saving briseis, outrage when she is taken away. Asking Achilles to save the other slave girls) and not when it doesn't affect him (talking about his mother nonchalantly, questioning why thetis hated Peleus when he also acknowledged how Peleus was involved in her rape).

[eddiezpaghetti]

Okay, so my experience with Stranger Things is a weird one.

I didn't care when it first came out, started to watch it out of "might as well" in 2020, wasn't interested in it enough to make it past S2, forgot about it outside of going "oh, hey, cool, there's a lesbian in it now, I guess," in S3, got really annoyed when "Running Up That Hill" got popular from it because it was a song I listened to on fucking loop after one of my best friends died in high school and I fully expected its appearance in the show to ignore the whole survivor's guilt theme of the song (and was very happy to learn later that it did the exact opposite of ignoring the lyrics), saw people drawing Eddie, suddenly got a lot more interested, watched just the fourth season like a fucking psychopath because I was seriously only there for Eddie, then got interested enough to start the show over properly, having mostly forgotten what I did watch of the show before.

And let me tell you something from the perspective of someone who started with the complete fourth season, who wasn't there from the start, who wasn't tainted by ship goggles or this internal battle of hope and despair, who wasn't theorizing about what the painting could be or expecting Mike and Will to kiss when Volume 2 happened or rooting for Mike and Eleven's relationship to go down in flames or whatever the fuck. Just someone who went blind into Season 4.

It's really fucking obvious that Will and Mike are gonna be endgame.

Like holy fuck. It's so fucking blatant I don't even know why people are nervous.

No sane fucking person would shoot this scene this way if they wanted the audience to care about El and Mike as a couple. Despite being all blurry in the background, Will's reaction to what's happening here is smackdab in the fucking middle, clearly showing that the important part is what's going through his head here. What he's feeling. It's like the opposite of that scene from Kingdom Hearts II where Sora and Riku reunite and Kairi just fucking vanishes into the aether while it's happening because, despite the fact that she was standing between them when the scene began, she doesn't matter to the scene, so she's just kind of gone when the camera angle changes. Will could have been behind one of their heads, or so far in the distance he blends in with the background, but he's not. He's so obvious that despite being massively blurred out, he's still the first goddamn thing you look at. What, you think that's an accident? You think he's in the middle of this dramatic fucking scene because of a mistake? He basically has a big flashing neon arrow pointing at him with "THIS IS THE POINT" being screamed through a megaphone.

And then this?

They're paired up like they're taking fucking prom pictures. Each one of these pairs is so fucking close to one another and so fucking far from everyone else. It's not, "Oh, they're standing vaguely near each other in a group shot," it's fucking Noah's Ark out here. Again, there's no way to take this as an accident. It's not just a framing issue. If they wanted to make the shot look balanced while still not hiding anyone else behind El, they would have scattered people around much more naturally. Even if they wanted to keep Nancy with Jonathan and Hopper with Joyce, there's so much room on that hill for three people to stand on El's left and three on her right. But they didn't do that. They put Mike and Will together on purpose in the most obvious way possible.

Like I get that coming up with crackpot theories is fun in and of itself and I'm not blaming anyone for having fun. I totally get the appeal of arguing a point and reaching for every stupid little thing to pull into it because it's like a game, okay? I've done that. But if you're trying to actually convince someone (whether it's someone who wants to believe or someone who's pissed at the very idea that Mike and Will could be in love), stay away from blue and yellow lights, stay away from costume design, stay away from the existence of closets in backgrounds. And don't worry about whether Mike's gay or bi when he's in love with Will either way. I'll give you a little tip about persuasion: You're only as strong as your weakest argument. Even if you've got strong stuff in there, too, the person you're trying to convince is going to dismiss anything you say as complete insanity the second you start going on an entire tangent about the shape of a character's fucking pocket.

Sometimes, clothes are just clothes. Sometimes, there's a closet in the background because it helps establish that a character is in a bedroom. Sometimes, blue and yellow are just a couple of colors that look nice together. And sure, it might be set designers and costume designers and cinematographers smirking and winking at the audience from behind the camera. But if the show was just those things, instead of those things in the context of everything else, they wouldn't be saying anything of note.

But this?

This tells a story all on its own. Someone with no context can look at this and automatically assume that each paired person is standing with someone they care about deeply, seeking comfort as they watch some sort of disaster unfold. And yeah, romantic couples usually come in twos, and we live in an amatonormative society, so that's going to be the first association anyone makes seeing a bunch of people paired off.

It's the same reason you look at this

And go, "Oh..."

"Those two are probably a couple."

And I genuinely don't understand how people could have watched S4 Vol. 2 and gotten scared. Because as someone who went in with no investment whatsoever, I just looked at these two--

--and went, "Oh, those two are a couple. Good for them." And I moved on. Shut up about the trees for five seconds and just see the forest for what it is.

Oh, and if you're still nervous? Little thing from a storyteller here: You don't leave a hanging thread like "Will confessed his romantic feelings for Mike by projecting them onto El, but Mike either didn't understand or at least didn't say he understood," without coming back to that later. That's Chekov's gun hanging on the wall, babes. It's gonna fire at some point. If Mike was going to reject Will's feelings, if they weren't relevant, they would have had that discussion in Argyle's van. There'd be no reason to leave you in suspense.

[will80sbyers]

I always write these letters in the middle of the night because it's the only moment when I think I'll have enough courage to send them to you, but then the morning comes and I feel completely powerless again.

I'm not as brave as I would like to be, I want to be like my character in d&d and just... I don't know, just tell you how I feel even if I think it's the scariest thing I will ever do. I mean, what if I am wrong and you don't feel the same? Or worse what if you find me revolting for being like this? What if you don't want to be my friend anymore because I have these feelings? It would be one of my worst nightmares becoming a reality... I just, I can't lose you, Will. I need you and I miss you so much and I don't even know what I did to make you decide to not talk to me anymore and avoid my calls every time but this whole situation is killing me slowly. I need to talk to you and I want to hear your voice. It's crazy how much I miss listening to you ramble about a new comic or a bad movie... I miss watching you randomly break out into songs, even when you're singing the most annoying ones. I miss having you close and just knowing that if I need your advice, or if I want to complain about some stupid thing my father said I can just take a bike ride to your house at any moment.

It feels so empty here now, I feel so empty... I'm, I dunno, I think the others have not noticed because everybody has their own problems, but I feel lost... You were always my compass, you put my mind on the right track every time and I never realized this before you left for Lenora but now I see it... and I don't know, it feels like everything is broken now and.. how am I even supposed to be a leader of a group with no group?

Everybody is pulling away from me here, except maybe Dustin... Lucas is trying to become popular, sometimes I think he's ashamed of being with us because we're still the same nerds we always were, and Max is dealing with her own pain by isolating, I'm trying to include her on the hangouts nights (yes, even if her and Lucas are broken up!) but she always says she's busy. If you and El were still here things would be different.

Jesus... El... I don't know what to do about her, I don't know how to tell her about all of these feelings I have for you and the realization I had this summer. I don't want to lose her either and I'm afraid she'll be angry at me.

I feel guilty for the fact that every night before I fall asleep I think about you. I think about you laying down in bed and I hope you're thinking about me too. I think about what I would do if you were here with me, how I would ask if I can kiss you... and I guess maybe I'm a horrible person all around for this but sometimes I just kiss you. You know, I wonder how it would feel every night... I think it must be different from what I'm used to, kissing a guy... less sweet? More rough? It doesn't really seem possible, I can't imagine kissing you wouldn't be the sweetest kiss I'll ever have... God, I'm sorry I don't have the courage to tell you how much I love you...

I'll tear this letter apart like I did to all the others.

Byler week - Day two: communicating

[ghostboneswrites2]

A Mess || Part 4

New account! @ghostbones was banned! Transferring everything here starting with this series since it was the most popular!

Summary: You struggle to recall your favorite songs. Daryl pushes you away.

18+ MDNI || Warnings: profanity, descriptions of child loss / child walker (zombie)

        Nothing had changed since the CDC. Well, except for your perception of life and how fragile it is. Being there, thirty seconds from evaporating, it was an eye opener to say the least. Then you were on the road again. 

        Shane's transgression was never addressed, at least not openly. He did, however, stay far away from you and Rick had barely spoken to him, so you guessed something happened there. By the time you all ended up on the Greene farm, Daryl had let up on you too, not worrying so much about you with Sophia's search on his hands. 

        You tried to help as much as you could, but the other women needed help around the camp too, so most days you were asked to stay behind. 

        Daryl and Rick seemed to be working well  together. Overall things were okay. You slept in the RV where Amy used to sleep, since you no longer had a tent. Plus, Shane couldn't get in there without someone noticing, so it was a win for you despite the guilt you felt taking Amy's place.

        Then came the day Shane lost his cool and opened up a barn full of walkers. You guys had no trouble taking them out, at least not until Sophia came stumbling out of the dark, snapping her jaw and growling. Her thin little frame contorting in the sunlight just shattered your heart.

        Of course Shane couldn't put her down. Rick had to be the one to step up and do the hard part. Shane was always claiming to be the one that could make the hard decisions, but in the end, when the task was actually hard to take on, it always had to be Rick. 

        Carol was a mess at first, but there was a calmness about her. She held her head high and kept her shit together, something you weren't sure you could have done yourself. You had lost a baby, years ago, but you had never met that baby. You never had the chance to hold that baby and shower it with love, to shape it and mold it into a person. Carol did, and she suffered such a loss yet she still remained soft and kind, something you envied.

        Just with the drama your life had become since the outbreak, you could feel yourself closing up, becoming harder, meaner, rougher. When your chores were finished you'd always disappear into the tree line, not far enough that you couldn't see the farm, but far enough that nobody could see you. It was peaceful there, and nobody tried to talk to you, which was exactly what you needed.

        Daryl and you had barely spoken, especially since Sophia. You tried to talk to him once but he just blew you off, telling you he didn't have time for whatever drama you had for him. You didn't have any drama, you just wanted to check on him, but you understood. He had gone out of his way for you so much and he owed you nothing, not even kindness.

        "What the hell are you doin' out here?" Lori shocked you as she approached you from behind. You were in the woods again, just sitting against a tree.

        "Sitting against a tree." You deadpanned. 

        "I can see that. We've been lookin' for you."

        You raised an eyebrow and looked up at her.

        "Look, I know you hate me. I get it. But things are hard right now and we can't afford more to worry about. So, please, just stop whatever this is." She begged.

        "I don't hate you." You sighed. "I hate Shane, and I hate that either of you were capable of hurting me that way."

        Her mouth opened and closed a few times, words dangling on a string, just out of her reach. 

        "I get it, you know? It sucks being alone out here." You nodded. What a funny little joke, now you were the one who was alone.

        "You're not alone. And I'm sorry about what I did but--"

        "I'll be back in a little while." You cut her off.

        "You need to come back now. Before Rick or Shane comes lookin' for you."

        "Why would either of them waste their time doing that? I'm fine, I'm safe, and I'm not far. Just tell them that." 

        "I'm not gonna tell 'em that. You are, right now, because we're goin' back."

        "Do you like music, Lori?" You asked suddenly, completely disregarding her.

        "What?" She shook her head.

        "I do. I love music. It was the only thing that soothed my soul, you know? I couldn't even tell you if I had a favorite song or musician because I loved so many songs from so many genres. Nothing amazed me more than the ability of a sing to make you feel understood. I can't listen to music, though, not anymore. So every day, I come out here, and I try to remember the words to at least five songs I used to listen to. You interrupted me on song number three."

        She just stood there, arms crossed. She shifted her weight impatiently before she sighed. "What song?"

        "I can't remember the name of it." You admitted. "Or all the words. Been racking my brain for like twenty minutes now."

        "What can you remember? Maybe I can help." She offered, sitting against the opposite side of the tree.

        "It was something like uh... My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' why I got out of bed at all. The mornin' rain clouds up my window.."

        "And I can't see at all." She began to sing with you, so you both continued in unison.

        "And even if I could it'd all be gray, but your picture on my wall. It reminds me that it's not so bad, not so bad."

        "So you know it? What was the name?" You asked her.

        "Thank You. Her name is Dido." She smiled, rubbing her hands together. "My friend used to play it on repeat."

        "Oh." You nodded. "You know, I'd kill to find a damn iPod or something."

        "Me too." She chuckled. "It would be nice to just tune everything out now and then. You know, Hershel's girl, Beth, she likes to sing."

        "Oh yeah?" You nodded. "Like church songs or something?"

        "Sometimes. She liked those songs that are sad but happy. You know?"

        "Yeah." You nodded. "Me too."

----

        You sat next to Carl that night by the fire, eating the concoction of boiled meat and vegetables. Carl had been telling you about a show he used to watch called Ben 10. You were giving halfhearted responses like "Oh yeah?... A watch could  do all that?.. Wow, dude... No, I would have never expected that.."

        Lori eventually  pulled him away to get ready for bed. Daryl finished his food before anyone else as per usual, and when you finished you decided to track him down. You decided he'd avoided you for long enough, and whether he liked it or not, he was your friend.

        "Thought I'd find you here." You said, squatting down in front of his opened tent.

        "Didn't take  much to figure that out." He said, laying on his back. He was still bandaged up from his fall in the ravine and Andrea's missed shot, but he was fine mostly. Hershel just insisted he kept it bandaged until it healed to prevent infection since he used the last of the antibiotics.

        "Funny." You rolled your eyes. "You gonna ignore me forever?"

        "Ain't ignorin' ya."

        "Kinda seems like it."

        "Why, cause I ain't watchin' over ya like a damn bodyguard?" He sat up now. "I ain't your fuckin' boyfriend."

        "Never said you were."

        "Well then quit actin' like it."

        "I know this is probably foreign territory for you, but I'm not acting like anything. I'm treating you like a friend. Clearly I misread the situation." You glared, standing up to your feet, but before you walked away; "Oh, and next time I'm in trouble, don't bother. I'll figure it out on your own. I don't need a bodyguard. I only needed a friend."

        As you walked away he threw himself back on his pillow, letting out a frustrated sigh. Why did he always do that? Lash out at people who were trying to be kind? He knew why, it was because he didn't need their pity. He tried to find Sophia and failed. He failed Carol, but he hadn't failed you, so he didn't owe you shit. 

        You shook with anger as you stormed off into the dark, across the open field and into the trees. On a normal day you'd pop your earbuds in and blast whatever song fit the mood as you strolled around the neighborhood, but you'd have to settle for the sound of your own voice in the dark this time.

        When you found a suitable tree to rest on, you sat against it, leaning your head back on the trunk and closing your eyes. 

        "Pardon me while I burst into flames         I've had enough of the world and its people's mindless games         So pardon me while I burn and rise above the flame         Pardon me, pardon me, I'll never be the same"

        "Shouldn't be out here singin' in the dark." Daryl spoke up. You jumped and looked up at him, rolling your eyes.

        "Jesus, can I never have a moment of peace?"

        "Could say the same for you. I was gettin' ready to go to sleep when you interrupted me in my own damn tent."

        "The difference is, I came to you as a friend, and you're here to give me some stupid lecture about not getting hurt." You shot back.

        "Is that why I'm here?" 

        "Yes, and you can save it for someone who needs it. I don't need a bodyguard, remember?"

        "Ain't here for that."

        "Then what?"

        "Just.. To uh, ya know. 'M sorry 'bout that back there."

        "Sorry? For what? You made yourself clear. It's cool. I get it." You looked back away from him, fixating on a tree.

        "I was just mad, ya know. All that time, still lookin' for her, thinkin' she was alive and I'd get her back to her momma. She was in that barn the whole time." He admitted. You sighed.

        "Yeah." You whispered. "She didn't deserve that."

        "Nah." He shook his head. "Just hate lettin' her momma down. Followin' all tem leads, gettin' her hopes up she was still out there..."

        "It was better than telling her she was dead and trying to get everyone to forget about it."

        "Was it though? I mean, what's worse?"

        "What's worse is feeling hopeless no matter what. At least you gave her some hope. It was more than anyone else could give." You told him. He fell silent, but you could hear him sit against the tree beside you, though you didn't spare him a glance.

        "This where you're always disappearin' to?" He wondered.

        "Uh-huh."

        "To sing?"

        "Trying to remember all the songs I used to like." You admitted.

        "Mm." He nodded. "Can't do that in your tent?"

        "No." You shrugged. "I prefer to be alone when I sing."

        "You and that farm girl would get along."

        "Now you sound like Lori." You rolled your eyes.

        "She talked to ya?"

        "Yeah. Helped me figure out one of the songs, too."

        "Mm. Y'all friends now or somethin'?"

        "Wouldn't say that. Guess you could say we're both victims of the same man."

        "Didn't seem like much of a victim to me." He scoffed.

        "He told her that her husband died and took advantage of her in her fear and grief. Think that's pretty twisted." Youo said.

        "Guess I didn't think 'bout it that way."

        "Why'd you come after me?" You asked, skipping over the small talk.

        "Didn't want ya out here alone. And I kinda wondered what the hell you were doin' in the first place."

        "Did you find your answer?" 

        "Guess so."

        "Well then why are you still here?" 

        "'Cause." He shrugged. 

        "You don't have to watch over me. I can take care of my own shit." You assured him.

        "I know." He said. You felt something warm wrap around your hand. You looked down and it was his own hand, laid over yours, fingers cupping under your palm lazily. 

        "What are you doing?" You asked, looking over your shoulder to him.

        "Dunno. Keep singin'." 

        "Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry, you don't know how lovely you are         I had to find you, tell you I need you, and tell you I set you apart         Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions, no, let's go back to the start         Runnin' in circles, comin' up tails, heads on a science apart"

Masterlist || Taglist

[9w1ft]

I'm a gaylor myself so this isn't coming from a place of hate but I really don't think karlie and taylor are still together, I think taylor still references her in her art and probably will for quite some time because that relationship -- whatever the nature of it was -- left such a deep impact on her. but I really can't see them still being together, I think she's forced herself to move on from karlie and has since dated a lot of other women. that doesn't mean her feelings for karlie have faded, just that they will probably always be there but they broke up for sure before 2019, I think. folklore and evermore, midnights even, are all breakup albums, I just can't see how they could still be together. especially all her anger and sadness in those songs that are thought of to be for karlie (like my tears ricochet or exile or mad woman) also the cover art being shoot in bedfords, new york, the exact same place where karlie got married feels more like taylor revisiting this place to really say goodbye and mourn her for one last final time so she can move on

sorry, this got a bit long, I just don't understand the appeal or the reasoning for lsk's because taylor has indicated so many times that they are over, she's been mourning her relationship with karlie quite publicly since 2019 (wearing all black during the lover era) so yeah

hi! i don’t usually respond to these but i’m not sensing any ill will so i’ve decided to give a reply a go.

first off, for me, i kinda just interpret her wearing black in the back end of lover era because her masters had gotten bought by scooter. and maybe the fact that she decided to not come out. there can be other reasons, but i really do not think that her breaking up with karlie has to be one of them.

another thing i can’t shake is the fact that it was a very notorious troll/manipulative person on tumblr who spread the first rumor that they broke up in 2019, a fact that is well understood by a lot of OG’s, and this troll got in the head of a few popular kaylor and gaylor swift accounts at the time and in doing so she got a lot of people to fold. she then went on to write all this progressively unhinged fanfiction about taylor and karlie trying to make one another jealous and sleeping with all these women, presented with the same level of seriousness with which she pushed the breakup agenda. even to this day, i see present day gaylors talk about stuff that stems from narratives this account and a few other power hungry accounts spread around many years ago and it honestly just goes to show how a lot of well known gaylors may be platformmed up but that don’t really know what they’re talking about.. i only write this because the troll deactivated about a year ago (maybe they’re lurking on platforms with more malleable minds—once a troll always a troll—but at least they’ve left here), they were a really dangerous person.. and several have wild receipts to prove it.

anyways sorry i recognize that’s a tangent, i guess what i mean to say by it is, a lot of the sentiment surrounding the idea of a 2019 breakup and the reinforcement of the narrative by a gaylor community none the wiser stems from the work of someone with disingenuous intentions. a lot of “masterposts” or “realistic timelines” draw from what this person made up and it’s gone through enough filters for it to seem like credible sentiment but like, if you were there and you read all of what she wrote you know how silly it all sounded and how incoherently it was all written.

okay so to circle back to more of a content-centric angle, in my interpretation of the events that gave us folklore, evermore, and midnights, taylor had so much to be sad about. her mom had been very sick, the pandemic arrived and she had to cancel lover fest, she had to come to terms with scott b having sold her work to her sworn enemy… songs on midnights and folklore, and on her lover era apple music playlist allude to certain other things that may have had her in a mournful mood. things were bad! and i don’t doubt that her and karlie have been through a lot. but for me, when you’ve got a ride or die love, you don’t just break up. this has been something frustrating for me and others, i think, to see so many people treat a relationship as either being all systems go or broken up, as if long term partners can’t experience sadness together, difficulty together, even heartbreak together.

i don’t like getting in to touchy subjects so much but there’s just been too much pointing towards what i consider to be a rather simple narrative that is a natural progression for people committed and in love. how did the lover music video begin and end? whats a randomly specific word in a song she performed at the grammys minutes after someone was announced to the world? what about taylor’s envisioned future stands out about the anti hero music video? i think i’ll stop here but idk man 😆 poke around my archive if you feel like wasting a few days of your life… there’s just been a consistent flow of the same kind of hijinks that we’ve seen from them for years, and i’d say that there are many songs that back up everything i’d want in order to stay invested in seeing if what i believe is true.

now, i know i just wrote what reads like a bunch of mumbo jumbo to people not following kaylor. but im okay with that. i’ve accepted that. and i know that the whole patterns and koincidences and twinning and symbolism beat isn’t for everyone and so i respect people’s decisions to believe they aren’t together, but in closing i’ll just say im sometimes at a loss to see time and time again people suggest that kaylors believe in kaylor because they find it appealing or because they want to ship it. when it’s literally not that— it just makes the most sense to a lot of us!

also, does this look like the face of someone mourning?

[notebookmusical]

I truly can’t pinpoint when/what exactly changed about Taylor’s fans/fandom but the last few years (especially the midnights release) has really soured things for me and it’s honestly quite disappointing as someone who genuinely enjoys her music and thinks she’s a great artists. how did we get to the point of not even being able to voice an opinion about taylor without being crucified online. or if heaven forbid you dislike a song/album or enjoy the work of one of her exes (john mayer, the 1975, calvin harris, etc)

i’ve always been very fascinated/intrigued by the relationship between celebrities and their fans. and i think it’s really interesting to look back and think about how taylor built her fanbase by making herself as palatable/relatable/approachable as possible. like secret sessions, t party/loft 89/rep room, swiftmas, lover diaries, etc — all of which allow for fan interaction — but also relies on people getting noticed which then in turn encourages people to be as vocal? extra? whatever it is. which then feeds into the "who is a bigger / better fan" competition. i'm speaking from personal experience here, as someone who has liked her since debut — but i think a lot of this is also rooted in how much of the world hated taylor swift prior to ... i want to say folklore, really — like it was deeply uncool to like taylor swift, to be a swiftie, etc. and because a lot of that early criticism was rooted so much in misogyny, i think fans felt the need to (over the years) defend her — and i was one of those! i still am, when i feel like people are criticizing her unfairly. but i think that lends into the "taylor swift has never done anything wrong, and she's perfect and if you disagree then you're against us and you're a fake fan" mentality.

and then i think there's an element of ... not necessarily a superiority complex, but a something among fans who have met taylor. it's a genius marketing move, intentions aside. taylor's music is very personal — and taylor's marketing, and persona is very personal, in a way that other artists prior to taylor weren't, i think. relatability sells. you can see it in the way that people talk about her, and her music. which is very different from the way people talk about other artists — and obviously there isn't anyone else out there with the amount of fame/popularity as her, but you don't see the same amount of fanfiction-writing personal-life-speculating-projection onto other artists' lyrics as you do with taylor. and i think that when someone is that vulnerable with their thoughts, it makes it easy for people to think that they know them personally.

and i think that — as much as i love taylor — it's important to talk about her white woman feminism mentality. and i think that also seeps into how her fanbase interacts with her. the ginny & georgia "joke" is what comes to mind the quickest, but there are countless instances of taylor's white woman feminism — and her benefiting from it. and obviously it was in her right to call out a misogynistic comment, especially one directed at her, but not saying anything when the actress got so much hate for a line she didn't write ... made me feel a bit 🥴. it's interesting to see who taylor will choose to align herself with, i guess is all i'm saying.

i've really taken a step back from taylor — not just because the fandom is exhausting ( the amount of things i've seen about her, joe, travis, etc. is ... something! it's all projection! we do not know anything about these people other than what they choose to show us! ) but also because of her saying that she wanted to be on the right side of history and then over and over again choosing to be increasingly passive and silent. she will call herself an ally but won’t even talk about queer rights; she won’t talk about the literal genocide that’s going on. gun control, abortion rights, anything at all. it's just "go vote" but even that is incredibly passive. but she will take time to remind us to buy new variants, and to stream her music, and that her ex sucks.

i think there was a huge shift that started with folklore/evermore, just given that there weren't a lot of albums being put out during that time, the overwhelming public reception to it — a lot of people who previously didn't care for (or disliked) taylor started to like her, to give her a second chance, etc. then we get into the rerecordings era/midnights/etc., which started off with fearless and nostalgia and then became "how quickly can i put out the next thing". and bailey @placeinthisworld posted this earlier, which i fully agree with. it's about the next award, the next milestone. it's just all quantity. it's overexposure.

and then we have the joe alwyn breakup and the public response to that was also ... interesting. like i saw people crying over it, or saying that love is a lie, removing things from their playlists, acting like they were the ones who had been broken up with. which is just ... odd, given that we aren't the ones in the relationship. and now there are all these comments about being a "joe defender". and then with taylor dating travis, it feels almost like some weird american pipe dream unfulfilled fantasy for so many people — the singer and the american football player. and obviously, i want her to be happy! i don't care who she dates! but i do think the public reception about her and travis has been ... incredibly odd, and i think that the way people talk about her and travis is just ... very ... off-putting and is very rooted in some weird ... stuff. "she finally gets to be small :(((((" is such a weird thing to say. it feels like there's even more projection and self-insert-y stuff with her dating travis, which is a level i did not think was possible from her fans (and more so, the general public).

i have not felt this ... detached and impassive about a taylor release, ever, and it just makes me incredibly sad because i love her music, and am excited about the work, just not excited about the public reception, the public autopsy of her and joe's relationship, or the noise, and i know that internet spaces (and spaces in general) are what we curate, but it's also difficult when she is everywhere.

[confess-ledzeppelin]

I know I'm probably crossing into controversial territory here, but I'm so sick of logging onto Tumblr just to find people talking shit about Jimmy and wishing the most horrible things imaginable over a single fucking thing. He's not a creep, he's not a pedophile, he's not a Satanist, he's not an asshole, and he doesn't deserve even a fraction of the hate he gets. I see it all the time and it's sickening what people wish on him.

I might as well address the elephant in the room first. Lori's story is pretty hard to find information for since she couldn't tell the truth to save her life (I frankly can't stand her because of that), but I did manage to find the actual facts:

First of all, it was never a "passionate long-lasting love affair", it was actually only a few months (they never hooked up again after that, even in the 80s) and they weren't "madly in love" or whatever. I'm frankly not sure which of them technically initiated the relationship (although it's something to take into account that Jimmy is much more reserved than most musicians (like, say, Jagger), and Lori was a groupie for a reason), but it wasn't the way Lori described it at all. She wasn't kidnapped by anyone, and the version about Jimmy waiting in his hotel room with a cane and no clothes on is the most ridiculous rubbish I've ever heard. This isn't fucking West Side Story. They did meet at a show, though. He recognized her as a model since she was at least decently popular, but it's not like he was just waiting on the edge of his seat for a chance with her.

Secondly, this girl was absolutely not groomed. While there are certainly some tragic stories about grooming and pedophilia in the music industry (or just the entertainment industry as a whole, really), Lori is NOT a part of it. Most of these girls, including her, knew what they were doing but didn't care. After all, why would they? It was (for the most part) socially acceptable at the time, even if it wasn't legal. There are lots of women out there who will admit to sleeping with older men while they were 12-17, I've heard it myself. Does that make it right? No, but it's not like she was pushed against a wall or coerced in any way, shape or form. Despite how her stories change every time she tells them, she has said she looks back on her time with Jimmy fondly (Jimmy was very good to all of his lovers, but whether they were good to him is a different story that I'll get to later). Does he? Not really, no. He hardly talks about it and I can't blame him. But if he could go back, it's something that wouldn't have been repeated. He is a human being who made a mistake that just like every single one of us has, yet for some reason he apparently deserves to go to hell for it. It makes no sense to me. One mistake shouldn't define who he is as a person. And by the way, the "Jimmy Page if minors" memes aren't funny and you know it. Stop.

Anyway, as for what I said about past lovers, it's honestly tragic. First it was Jackie DeShannon, the same girl that kept him physically retrained in a hotel room against his will and assaulted him at least once, all while insisting that she loved him. And he believed it. One of her two songs about him, "Don't Turn Your Back On Me", basically gives the message of "we are going to last last forever. And if we don't, yes we will. Fake it 'til you make it, or else." It creeps me out. Next it was Charlotte, the same woman who allegedly cheated on him several times (even though he was faithful to her just like every other woman he was with), started heated arguments with him constantly (one time during a fight she even slapped him hard in the face while wearing several rings, which likely drew blood), and always retained a very "well he's okay, I guess" view on him even when they were having a baby. Jimmy, on the other hand, adored her and tried to give her the best. He even once said something along the lines of, "as long as I have Charlotte, I'll be okay" when he felt threatened. Basically, he would've crossed an ocean for her while she wouldn't have crossed a puddle for him. Their entire story actually reminds me a lot of Since I've Been Loving You, and he deserved so much better. Maybe there were even more incidents like these that never made it to the public, even though I don't think they're very well-known. Naturally there was also Lori, who was - to put it lightly - way more trouble than she was worth, and just her existence unfairly taints his reputation. There were also a few times when screaming girls mobbed the stage and started taking his clothes off, although I suppose they don't count for this bit.

But imagine if that shit was reversed. He would be crucified. And the best part? People actually turn it around to make it sound like it was him doing all of that. Absolutely rich. I really think people hate him just for the sake of it.

Another thing is his interest in the occult and how he's typically assumed to be a Satanist, because he gets plenty of hate for that, too. I'll put it this way: if I were to be super interested in, say, sharks, does that make me a marine biologist? Even if I study sharks for hours and visit the aquarium every week, even if I buy a whole bookstore about them, does that make me one? No, of course not. I don't see a difference. I know many occultists practice witchcraft and worship Satan and a bunch of really creepy things, but he's not one of them.

People also dislike him just for being a general asshole, and that's just as wrong. He's a sweetheart, a gentleman, and he's actually pretty funny, too. This is the same guy who rushed to help Robert up back when he was on crutches and fell in a studio. Robert said he'd never seen him move so fast. He's been there for Robert through a lot, and I think it should be said that the only reason he wasn't present at Karac's funeral was because he was physically unable. 1977 was obviously one of the worst - if not THE worst - year for him as far as his health; I think we all know that. He had even lost so much weight that his clothes from school were huge on him. But when the media came after him for answers on why he wasn't there, he accidentally made himself look pretty callous (as far as Jones goes on the situation, my guess is that he just already had vacation plans or figured it wasn't his problem anyway).

Also worth mentioning, Jimmy has done TONS of work for charity. He joined and played a part in Task Brazil, the ABC Trust, the Ahmet Ertegun Education Fund, Childline, Mount Sinai Hospital, MusiCares, the AIDS Memorial Campaign and Racehorse Sanctuary (I believe these are also supported by Robert, naturally).

This is also the same dorky guy who was found in a literal pillowcase by a roadie who was sent to wake him up. The same guy who sneezed while recording the Stairway to Heaven solo and grew frustrated with himself and started apologizing while the rest of the band couldn't stop laughing their asses off. The guy who knows not to take himself obnoxiously seriously and can laugh at himself, and has a great sense of humor. He's shy and reserved, but he's always been kind enough to notice when other people have needed help. He's always been a very polite "yes sir and no ma'am" kind of guy who says gosh instead of swearing and has a very soft voice. He's also the ultimate mama's boy, and still is even with her gone.

Sometimes he even says the most beautifully poetic things ever. "I'm just looking for an angel with a broken wing." "I remember when I was young I used to run along railway bridges with 250 foot drops... just dancing..." I mean, come on.

I'm not sure what about this guy is worth hating.

Anyway, that's my soapbox. Thanks.

Also can't fit this onto a picture, so just sharing as is. Thanks, anon!

[joels-shitty-puns]

The Key To Your Heart - Track 8

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Musician!Reader

Series Summary: After writing your feelings for Pedro into a song, it gains a lot more popularity than expected. Ultimately it brings both criticism and support, with new possibilities around the corner.

Series Warnings: 18+ only (MDNI). Alluding to sexual scenarios. Kissing. Fat shaming, name calling. Mentions of food, weight loss, weight gain, dieting, weighing, potential eating disorder, food guilt. Potential for puns/dad jokes (name of my blog, and the fic) should give that away. This is my first fic which should be its own warning, lol. Also some cursing. Mentions of masturbation (f) maybe more smut later idk. Sadness, reader is pretty depressed. Poor body image. Rude people. Bullying-ish and just lack of support? Anxiety. Age gap! Reader is in her mid 20's, Pedro is current age (48).

Other stuff: Reader is plus sized. AFAB. Inexperienced. Also has a dog, but you can pretend it is another creature probably. Further, in case it isn't clear, italics almost always are the reader's inner thoughts!

Word Count: 2.8k

Series List: Here!

Miss Chapter 7? Here!

Hi all! I know this one took a lot longer than previous. I was on vacation and then went straight into my work week. I almost thought about ending it after the last chapter but I realized there's still some loose ends! Also I gotta say I'm really overthinking the voicing for Pedro, but I hope you all enjoy it nonetheless. This chapter entirely got away from me and wasn't the plot I anticipated, haha. Once again, thank you all for reading. I love all the comments, messages, and asks I get about my story and it honestly blows me away. Please continue to like, reblog, and let me know what you think! Love to you all!

Also I made dividers! Weeehooo

The rest of the evening was filled with kisses, cuddles, and sweet nothings whispered to each other through smiles. It was just a quarter after midnight when Pedro finally pulled his lips away from yours and looked at the clock. Turning to set his forehead on yours once again, he quietly spoke.

"I should probably get home, Princesa," he punctuated with another kiss.

You let out a whine, but knew you weren't ready for it to move much further than this too quickly. "What time is it?" You kissed him.

"It's already after midnight." He kissed.

"Hmm," you hummed with another press of your lips to his. "And I never even turned into a pumpkin." Kiss.

"I don't think that's how the story went, mi amor," he ran his hand over your hair, kissing your lips, your cheek, below your ear, and finally your neck.

"Mmmm," you sighed, tilting your head to give him better access. "I can't really think clear enough about how that story went right now." You ran your fingers through his curls.

He kissed down your neck again a few times before gently nibbling your earlobe. Your breath caught in your chest.

"We should really slow this down and call it a night," he whispered directly into your ear. You felt his nose brush your hair and his warm breath on the side of your face. 

You sighed with a pout of your lips. You knew he was right. It was too soon into the relationship - or whatever this is - to go any further. But damn, would you be lying if you said you didn't want it.

"I know, baby. I know." He sighed in response, caressing your cheek with his thumb.

He pulled back, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, and adjusting in his seat, pulling his sweater down further over his waist. You tried to ignore it, but you couldn't help letting your eyes drift down a little lower towards the area he was trying to cover. He placed his hands in his lap, clearing his throat. You looked back up at his face, noticing his cheeks turning a pink hue.

Guess I'm not the only one feeling a little excited here, you thought with a smirk at the idea of you making him react this way. You rubbed your thumb across his reddened cheek. "Don't worry, baby. Me too," you sighed, feeling a little antsy and frustrated yourself. His eyebrows raised, mouth pulling into a mischievous sideways smirk. 

The two of you let out a nervously happy laugh. "Maybe… I could take you on a real date soon? If you would like that?" Pedro asked, looking at you once again with those big brown eyes. "I would love that, Pedro. More than anything." You pecked his lips once more, running your hand over his bicep.

He kissed you back before pulling away with a small laugh. "Okay, I gotta go, baby. I'm enjoying this a little too much, and we should probably cool it down." He gave another nervous laugh.

"Sorry," you giggled. "You're kind of addicting, and you don't know how long I've waited for this. Kissing. Mutual feelings. Romance…" you trailed off with a grin.

"Love?" He asked, holding your cheek and giving a soft smile.

"Yes. That too." You closed your eyes, leaning into his cheek. "But that still sounds so wild to me.  I'm scared to say it to you in case you'll change your mind, or realize you don't feel the same, or that it's too soon for… that word, or…" you rambled quietly, your insecurities creating a wall you know all too well.

"That just isn't true, sweetheart. I know it's soon, and we technically just met, but we've been talking for several months now. We've talked nearly every day. I started to realize I might love you a while ago, but seeing you for the first time over video really made me know for sure. Getting to meet you in person somehow even made me fall harder," he held your hand in his.

"After just one meeting? I mean, it's just… people that have known me for years haven't felt that way, and someone like you? Someone famous and beautiful and so much more experienced and mature than me… I just.. I don't want to push you away, but I can't help but worry that you'll change your mind or it isn't real and it's all just going to… vanish," you looked down at your connected hands, closing your eyes to swallow your emotions.

"Hey.. don't do that. Don't put yourself down or build those walls. I fell in love with your music and your voice the first time I heard it. Getting to know you through text and finally talking to you on the phone, getting to learn all your quirks and your sense of humor, your personality. You. I don't know how anyone could not fall in love with you, and I was scared to let it happen. I told myself not to get wrapped up in relationships. That it would just cause more heartache that I couldn't go through again. But somehow you lured me in like a siren and I couldn't ignore it. I heard your song and wanted to know you. I talked to you and needed more. I don't care that you weren't famous before, and that you don't have a lot of experience with relationships. And any other insecurities you have can just go away, because they aren't true. You are beautiful. You're funny, smart, sweet, and you have the most beautiful voice and heart of anyone I know. I knew you were beautiful before I saw you, and I fell so hard when I finally saw you for the first time."

"Pedro…" you blinked at him.

"The constant thought that you already loved someone, and it, to my knowledge, wasn't me, hurt every day I talked to you. But I couldn't stay away. I just kept wanting to be closer. I want to be with you. If anything, I wonder why you would want to be with someone so much older than you. Someone who can't love you the way you deserve, without paparazzi and fans and spotlights. I hope you won't change your mind. Because despite my best efforts to avoid relationships, I fell in love."

You had tears in your eyes as you looked up from your lap to meet his eyes. "I love you Pedro."

"I love you too." He kissed your lips once again, and as he pulled away, he said your name in a whisper. "Believe me, having to stop kissing you is just as difficult for me too. Maybe tomorrow I can take you on that date?" He asked, standing up with your hand in his.

"I'd love to go on a date with you," you smiled at the ground, cheeks heating. 

"Great! I'll talk to you tomorrow," he kissed your cheek before kneeling down to give Skipper a gentle rub and receiving several wet doggy kisses. The two of you laughed as Pedro stood, wiping his face on his sweater. "What can I say, I like kisses from everyone in this household." He winked.

"Okay cheeseball, get outta here," you gently shoved him before giving a final kiss and waving goodbye to him.

The next day, you were sleeping in, feeling relaxed and happy, like you finally could rest easy. It was around 11 AM when your phone rang, waking you up from your deep, peaceful slumber. Blinking your eyes open to see the morning sun beaming through the window, you stretched and grabbed your phone, looking at the clock as you did so. It was Pedro calling.

Cheerily, you answered the phone, though your voice betrayed you, still sounding groggy and cracked having just awoken. "Morning Pedro!"

"Baby… were you crying?" He asked, sounding concerned.

"What? No? I just woke up. Why would I be crying after having such a nice night with you?" You giggled.

He didn't laugh. In fact, he was a bit quiet. Unusual for the bubbly personality he usually was. "Pedro?" You asked after a beat of silence, suddenly feeling nervous.

He sighed and said your name in a tone that sent a chill down your spine. "I think you should check your phone. It's… something's happened. You should see it yourself. I just… I'm so sorry. I hope you'll forgive me."

Your blood ran cold. What is he talking about?

"Pedro, I don't under-" he interrupted you. "Please. I'm sorry. Just, you should read through everything and think things through. I hope you'll still want to call me back and talk. Goodbye. I love you." He hung up the phone.

With shaky hands, you looked at your phone. 45 missed text messages, 10 of which were from Pedro. 200 notifications on your personal Instagram. 20 emails. 

What the hell?

You first opened Pedro's texts.

"Baby. I'm so sorry. I should've never dragged you into all this, I'm so sorry."

"I'm sure you've seen by now, I'm so sorry."

"Please forgive me."

"I know you probably want your space, but I hope you're okay. I love you."

"Baby?"

"Are you okay?"

"I'm getting worried"

"Can we talk?"

"I hope you're just asleep or something."

"I never meant for this to happen."

What. The hell. Happened?

The other messages were from family and friends, all seeming to be freaking out about something. Still confused, you finally came across your answer.

News articles flooded your page. 

"Pedro Pascal Seen Leaving Party with Mystery Woman"

"Pedro Pascal Enjoys Halloween Party with Date"

"Pedro Pascal: New Girlfriend??"

"Pedro Pascal: Matching Costumes with Unknown Girl"

Oh shit.

Photo, after photo, after photo. You kept reading.

"Mystery Girl's Co-Worker Speaks Out!"

"Unknown Woman Is Pedro Super Fan"

"Pedro Pascal Dating Obsessed Fan?"

"Pedro Pascal Being Stalked By Woman"

Okay this is getting absurd. 

You clicked on the coworker article. Sure enough, your coworker, one you always thought was rude, had thrown you under the bus. Your name was out there now, thanks to her. "She and I go way back. We're practically besties. And yeah, she's totally in love with Pedro Pascal. Obsessed even."

That. Bitch, you thought angrily.

It was time to call your agent, Rose. You already had several missed calls from her, and she knew all about Pedro and your crush. She had become your confidante. You dialed her number and she quickly answered on the first ring.

"Rose! What should I do? There's pictures of me everywhere. My name is out there. My coworker commented on it. I haven't left my bedroom yet, but I wouldn't be surprised if they've found out where I live. I'm so scared. I don't know how to deal with this kind of thing."

You were on the verge of tears.

"First of all sweetheart," she calmly answered in her southern twang, "take a deep breath." You did what she said, though it hardly seemed to help.

"Second of all, I've been working on some fixin' since it all caught wind this mornin'. Things are startin' to calm down. Nobody seems to know that you're that singer, either. They just think you're some girl who managed to meet Pedro. But, I will say I think this may be the push you need. It might be time to tell the world, sugar. How you choose to do that is up to you, but don't you worry, I'll put out the fires."

You took a deep breath and sighed. "I think you're right. It was only a matter of time."

"Have you talked to Pedro yet?"

Shit. Pedro.

"Sort of. He called and woke me up. He apologized and basically hung up, telling me to call when I read everything. But I had a bunch of texts from him. He kept apologizing."

Rose clicked her tongue. "That poor sweet man. None of this was his fault. You know that too, right, darlin'? This is just what happens in show business. It ain't fair, but it also isn't his fault."

"I know that, Rose. He didn't do anything wrong. I got so caught up in all the headlines that I immediately called you and forgot to call him back. I bet he feels awful. I should get back to him. I hope he's okay, too. He only seemed concerned for me, but most of those headlines were actually about him and his dating life. I can't believe I put him through that." You suddenly realized what he may also be feeling after his confessions last night about avoiding relationships, and the inability to give you privacy from paparazzi.

Rose sighed. "Now if you don't call that sweet man, I will! You two lovebirds are perfect for each other. Apologizin' and feelin' awful for one another when neither of ya did anything wrong. Go get 'im. And hang in there, love. It'll all work out, trust me."

Your cheeks heated at her words about you and Pedro. "Thanks Rose. You always know what to say."

You two hung up and immediately you called Pedro.

"Pedro… I'm so sorry."

"Hon- wait what? Why are you sorry??"

"Those headlines were about you too, and your dating life and history. I hate that you were dragged into all this drama."

"Honey, no, please don't worry about me. Are you okay?? I know this is new for you and some of those articles were pretty mean. And that coworker of yours!? Clearly not a friend. How are you feeling?"

You took a deep breath. "Honestly, P, I'm so stressed. But I talked to my agent and she really talked me down. She said she's been playing crisis management all morning and it's dying down. But she does think it's time I tell the world who I am."

"Oh… babe. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I was so selfish, I just wanted to see you and I didn't think about the consequences. I should have known this would happen."

"Pedro, please don't feel bad. None of this is your fault. She's right, it's time. I couldn't keep it a secret forever. And the party was not a great experience, but honestly, last night was one of the best nights of my life."

"So.. you still want to be with me?" He asked, cautiously.

"What? Yes, what kind of question is that? I love you, Pedro. Of course I want to be with you. Did you change your mind?"

"No!" He answered quickly. "I want to be with you."

"Good!" You smiled for the first time since seeing all the turmoil today. "I guess I better figure out my plans for the big reveal. I have some ideas, but…" you trailed off, pausing a few seconds.

"What is it, baby?"

"I don't want to make you feel like you have to if you don't want to, but… would you come over? I think I'll go on Instagram live, and I don't want to be alone. You don't have to be in the shot, I just want your presence there. You make me happy. Just you, me, and Skipper together today."

"Of course. Anything. I'll be there."

"Thank you, P. Give me an hour?"

"Perfect. I'll see you then. I'll bring you breakfast."

"Thank you, Pedro. You're really too good to me."

"No such thing, mi amor. You deserve it."

The conversation ended, and you showered, thinking through your words for the internet. Picking out the perfect outfit and place in your house for the big reveal, it wasn't long before the hour was up and Pedro was knocking on your door with breakfast and drinks in hand.

"Yum! Thank you, Pedro." You helped him carry, and then kissed him deeply, pouring all your love into the kiss, letting all your stresses of the day fade into pure love. He kissed you back, pulling you in closer by your lower back. "I wasn't sure if you were too stressed to eat, so I got things that would be okay to reheat, or leave out until you felt up to it."

"You're the best, you know that?" You rubbed his cheek.

"Mmmm, that's yet to be revealed, mi amor" he raised an eyebrow and winked, pulling you in for another kiss. You giggled, feeling bubbles of nerves and butterflies in your stomach at his implications. But now was not the time for those thoughts. You had more pressing matters.

Pedro noticed your stress shift. "You ready?" He asked while squeezing your arm. "I'm about as ready as I'm gonna be, I guess," you shrugged. "Let's do this." You stated, him answering with a curt nod.

The two of you made way to your music room, setting up your tablet in the right place near your desk. He sat in a chair just on the other side of you, outside of view, but close enough to make you feel more at ease. He was even close enough to hold your hand under the desk if you needed. Meanwhile, Skipper sat under the table near your feet, willing to keep you company when he could tell you were unhappy.

"Here we go," you breathed. You clicked the button to go live, and the stream began.

Want more? Track 9: Here!

Thank you for reading! Stay tuned for more!

Taglist: (Want in? Let me know!)

@pedrotonin @starcrossed02 @lightupsketchersperson @cartoon-garbage04 @tyferbebe @maryfanson @gwendibley84 @faithfullyyours2000 @brilliantopposite187 @hc-geralt-23 @jenniferpendragon @winchestergypsy90 @red-red-rogue @theendwhereibegin @lottieellz101 @oliversaurus @kyga01 @milly-louise @titabel @taz-97 @stefanibear003 @marantha @fandomoniumflurry @ilovemybrown-eyedbabygirl @leiadjarin

[bengals-barnesbabe]

Pairing: Joe Burrow x Singer!FemReader

Summary: When the secret relationship between a famous singer and a popular quarterback is revealed no one could be happier. But when lyrics to an unreleased song are released, the strength of their relationship is questioned and tested when fans, reporters and exes start coming into the mix. Will you get your happy ending or is this the beginning of the end?

Chapter 13: 'i love you, goodnight' tour

#Track9 Masterlist

Warnings: 18+, mentions of sex, foul language.

Part One🖤

Word Count: 1.2k

Anxiety courses through your veins like hot lava as you wait for your name to be announced. You haven't done a live appearance like this since before you and Joe went public with your relationship, not one with an audience that is. During rehearsals Jimmy reassured you that it would be more fun than stressful, but that does not include the buildup to it. Usually you’d be texting or talking to Joey right now but he’s knee deep in meetings across the country so thats not an option. So its just you and your nerves.

“For tonight’s musical guest, we have the incredibly talented and beautiful Venus, she will be singing her latest single off of her new album ‘Tell Me You Love Me,’ everyone allow me to introduce Venus to the stage.”

 I guess that’s my cue.

Walking out to the lively applause and the smiling host helps you shed some of the nervousness that plagued you earlier. You and Jimmy share a quick hug before turning towards the audience and smiling and waving back.

“Venus, everyone. Wow, they might love you more than me.” He jokes as you both take your seats.

“Well, I love everyone here equally.” You wink at the audience causing a wave of laughter. “Thank you so much for having me, Jimmy.”

“The pleasure is all mine, the last time you were here you had just won your first grammy’s and there was someone else with you backstage that we’re missing today.” He lightly smirked. Fantastic start right.

“Its crazy that it was only a little over a year ago when my life completely changed. Then even more so in the last few weeks, everything is absolutely insane and I wouldn't wish for it any other way.” You widely grinned, dusting off the last part of his question.

“Thats great,” he says then pulls up a photo of you at the SuperBowl. “You surprised everyone when you joined Usher at this year’s SuperBowl, tell us how this came about.”

Your eyes crinkled up as the memory flooded your brain. “Of course, so for those who don’t know Usher is one of the big industry people that discovered me way back when, so he’s been like my mentor ever since. He called me in about November and told me that he was going to

headlining it and I was ecstatic for him. It was about time we had an Atlanta centered show, and then he asked me if I wanted to join him. I immediately said yes, like Usher just asked me to perform with him, I don't care what stage we’re on or even the fact that I know him personally. The man is an absolute legend and it was an honor to share the stage with him. Being apart of his surprise guests was so exciting and I was starstruck the entire time.” 

“Thats incredible, you were amazing up there and I hope we see you headlining it someday.” He winked.

“Who knows what the future holds.” You chuckled.

Then a picture of you and a certain someone shows up on the screen behind you cause the audience to start hollering and your face to heat up a bit. “Oh what do we have here, I have no idea how that got up there.” You smiled then shook your head.

“I’m just going to ask the question and see how far you want to go. How did this happen, where did this romance come from?” He says hiding his face behind his cards.

“God, I’d like to say that I don’t know, but that’s not true. You can thank LSU for that, we met at the beginning of our senior year and became really fast friends. There was always some kind of attraction on both ends, but we didn’t do anything about that until two years later. And we’ve been together ever since.”

“That’s cute, you guys look great together. So were together during your first appearance?”

“Yea, he was backstage with me trying to stop me from freaking out about performing for y'all.” Everyone cracked up at that one.

“I don’t know how you could be nervous about this, you are absolutely killing it. Now lets talk about the album, this track 9 controversy, what happened?”

“My lack of media training happened,” you huffed. “Im joking, but not really. I was really excited to put out this project and even more ready to actually show the world who I dedicated it to. I worked on this album for a really long time, it was like journaling an adventure and the hardest part was finding a way to condense 5 years into one album. In the end, we were all satisfied with what we made then what I thought was going to be a fun little peak at track 9 turned into absolute chaos.”

“For a few weeks, it seemed like every media outlet could not stop talking about this song and really giving Joe a bad rep in the process.”

“One that wasn’t deserved at all. Joe was such a good sport through the whole thing because he’s such a laid back guy. While I was basically preparing for war, he was the one calming me down about it. Everything was so fresh to the outside world that people just took it to an extreme that it was no where near. When artists release a body of work, I think fans skip past the time element. That particular song was written before I was even signed, I was still working my regular 9 to 5 in Louisiana and using songwriting as a way to cope with my feelings. And its extremely dramatized. For something to be entertaining that might be banal to most, you amp it up and Track 9 was taken from a 4 to a 10 in one session. By the time we were putting together this album, Leon Thomas III, absolutely incredible musician and producer, heard it and decided to rework it. When he was finished, everyone in the room was in love with it, we almost made it a single.”

“Its funny how things like that happen. Before we let you go and hit that stage, give us a little about the song you will be performing in a bit.”

“Absolutely, earlier this week I released ‘Prayer for the Broken’ as a single because I wanted to be able to give to communities that are struggling right now. This song is about how love is the only thing that can fix our broken world so all the proceeds that it brings in will be donated to multiple charities around the world, to help people and communities in horrid conditions. These charities are on my website so if anyone wants to donate straight to them, please do. This song means a lot to me and I hope everyone loves hearing it live.”

“Tonight only?”

“Live tonight AND this summer when I go on my ‘i love you, goodnight’ tour. I hope to see you all there and maybe I’ll bring some friends along too.”

🝮

“Ladies and Gentlemen give it up once again for Venus!”

<<<Previous Chapter | Next Part>>>

Main Masterlist

[crumblinggothicarchitecture]

Hi, I absolutely love the way you breakdown tswift songs, and I just wanted to clarify something, that's been bothering me. In 7 she mentions this part "we'll move to India forever" at first I was just like yeah, but the more I listened to it, the more I was like what kind of fucking colonist/white mindset is that? You'll never tour to India but you want to move here?? LIKE??? NO!!!! Don't!!! We've had enough of you white people exploiting us without ever actually ever caring for our country.

Feel free to vent about whatever Taylor Swift lyric you hate. I literally love it. :)

Because you're right, I always saw the line "we'll move to India forever" in the most charitable light. I remember thinking to myself, when I first heard it, that maybe she just loves India.

It made sense to me- because during the pandemic I fell into reading a BUNCH about India's culture, religion, food, anything. (My interest was mostly a result of linguistic interest into how India has shaped the English Language over time). Despite English only being present in the region due to colonialism, India has had a remarkable impact on shaping the Language itself! I emphasize post-colonial theory in my real job- and while I don't write much on India's relation to English Linguistics, I enjoy reading on the subject. So that's why I find it so interesting- because it really speaks to human ingenuity and perseverance. You know? The linguistic diversity present in India alone is so cool- and I really could talk about it forever.

So, I heard the line, and my first thought was like "yeah, okay maybe she just loves India?"

I think I was being too kind with that initial response.

But dude- she's never even toured in India? Like she just refused to go? She's never once talked about India in a positive light at all. So then why would she write that line? Like she will go to any random country in Europe, go to any random state in the USA, and go to couple of select places in Latin America, but it seems like she outright ignores Southern parts of Asia? Except Singapore- because they gave her a boatload of money, I guess. So, why write that line? Why write all of "Karma" is she has no genuine interest or respect for the people from which that philosophy comes?

In combination with her obvious pro-colonialist imagery in her other work, like the "Wildest Dreams" music video, the line in "Bejeweled" about reclaiming the land, and the latest line in "But Daddy I Love Him" about how she wants to win the West, I now believe her line about moving to India to be pure Orientalism.

Plus, the whole issue with the "Karma" song in which she is denigrating the philosophical concept of Karma and making it seem like nothing more than a shallow idiomatic ideal on revenge.

I think she's just an idiot who wants to mention "India" like it's some fantastical realm far away from "reality" (Eg), to her, the USA, as if India is not a real place with a real history and real culture. This is what I mean when I say she offers India no respect or appreciation- you can't liken a place to a mystical realm removed from reality without removing it from its history, culture, and people.

If the whole line is "Pack your dolls in a sweater/ We'll move to India forever/ Passed down like Folksongs" ("Seven" 2020).

She is intuitively linking the concept of moving to India with that of a childhood fantasy- with the word "dolls"- one childhood fantasy which will be ultimately unfulfilled. Thus, I support the argument that her line about moving to India is only in reference to the fact that it's like an unreal fantasy- worlds away from reality.

In literary theory, we call this process of subjective reality removal, and fetishization of the East as a fantasy realm, Orientalism. Orientalism is the act of creating a fantasy of the East, in this case India, that is often full of stereotypes or predicated solely on the myopic lens of western perspective.

Naturally, this facet of literature was mainly popular during the height of British Colonialism in India- in the 19th century. So why is Taylor Swift negotiating Orientalist attitudes in a song in the year of 2020? WHY! Uh- (because she's a fucking Racist with no respect for anyone who's not White and from USA). I've been blind- I fear.

It's such a rude oversimplification of such a diverse and interesting place- and all of her many nods towards Colonialism are so disgusting - I'm actually pissed off about it.

Anyway- That was my long-winded way of completely agreeing with you. You're right it's a shitty colonialist attitude and she should not be getting away with it.

[helshollowhalls]

I have some thoughts. On Mysta's graduation. And the current state of Nijisanji in general.

At the end of the day, I am not surprised. I expected someone else to graduate first, hell I even expected Niji to keep more of an iron grip on their money makers aka Luxiem in order to milk them for more cash, but I digress.

Mysta is graduating and it only goes to show that their 'money first, talent... third? last?' approach comes back to bite them in the arse. This might be the potential wakeup call for everyone who has yet to realize that the entire English branch of Nijisanji is crumbling away in record time because of the absolutely abysmal talent management and treatment of the livers.

I refrained from speculating who would be the next ones to graduate after Nina - simply because I will leave that job to the anonymous leakers on the site/platform that shall not be named here. Apparently Shu and Vox were brought up as the potential next people to graduate (this is according to a recent Depressed Nousagi stream but he didn't show any screenshots so take that with a massive bucket of salt.) Mysta was allegedly also mentioned down the line, but he seemingly wasn't the first choice.

Honestly, if you think about it the entirety of Luxiem must be so done mentally. They didn't know what to expect when they signed up to become Nijisanji's first male English-speaking Vtuber group. They waltz onto the scene, explode in popularity all over the world out of nowhere basically and suddenly they're Niji EN's favorite child. The company is milking them for all they have because OH BOI do they rake in the cash - not to mention from a target audience that was completely ignored before in the EN corporate sphere - female viewers.

In a lot of things the boys weren't given any choice. Jazz On The Clock? The first ever second unit song in Niji EN ever and it was released even before their anniversary. With Luxiem being the fourth EN wave in total it felt a little counterintuitive - Wouldn't they start another potential wave of unit songs with LazuLight, their first wave? Well, now that Light Me Up is out and Pomu talked about the entire fiasco of LazuLight basically fighting management tooth and nail to be allowed a second unit song, I think most of us can guess how things are going at Anycolor. And in case you're not entirely convinced, just look at the amount of Luxiem merch Niji has put out compared to any other EN wave.

It's not just JotC, but their anniversary/irl Japan meetup stream as well. That stream was something that personally really rubbed me the wrong way because it felt very inauthentic. It felt like the five of them were just shoved into a room at the Niji HQ to play Smash and do some batsus while the executives and managers proceeded to lock the doors and breath down their necks for the entirety of the stream. The stream had a very different feel to it - Comparing it to other Luxiem collab streams or even other anniversary streams. Management didn't consider it necessary to order Obsydia or Ethyria to Japan and record their anniversary streams at the Niji HQ - Well, that would be because none of them make the company as much sweet sweet cash as Luxiem - Closest would maybe be Selen. And even she has been public about the management fuck-ups - I am talking about her outfit design contest here, of course.

But back to Luxiem. I don't follow them as closely as I used to in the beginning, infact I am only subscribed to Shu out of the five, so let's start from here.

The entire wave collectively tweeted very salty and sarcastic remarks about the official announcement of the EN 3D Live Concert being "postponed due to COVID" earlier this year. But out of all of them, it seemingly hit Shu the hardest. I noticed that he was streaming less and less, infact he still isn't streaming as much as he used to.

Ike... oh boi, where do I even begin. Judging from his spontaneous irl hangout with Vox recently and the amount of projects he has been involved in as a vocal mixer, not to mention his two recent songs of which one is an original, this man seems to be working 30 hours a day and is stressed to the max.

Mysta made his personal situation and his ongoing burnout/lack of goals to work towards very clear in his graduation announcement stream, so I won't go into detail.

Vox has also been streaming less frequently. During the course of his employment at Nijisanji he got diagnosed with ADHD and PTSD (I believe), started therapy and medication, had a panic attack during an ASMR stream, started new projects and also some personal issues in his private life to deal with.

I have to be honest about Luca - I don't really know anything about what is going on with him apart from the fact that he planned to move again and got a puppy.

In conclusion, I could see reasons for anyone of them graduating anytime soon. Management isn't treating them well - Management isn't treating anyone in EN well, it seems - and at some point that fact doesn't warrant staying with the company anymore. Plus, money isn't really an issue for any of them at this point I assume - Especially Vox and Mysta. Both of them have enough money to fulfill their potential aspirations as indies or under another agency or manager.

Infact, apart from a couple of livers I can see anyone graduating next because of how Nijisanji handles things.

Some may argue that it all started going downhill when they kicked Yugo or when Zaion got terminated - Regardless of what you think, at the end of the day, the entire branch is seemingly falling apart right in front of us and Nijisanji's reputation is tanking, especially with the English-speaking fanbase, while Hololive idly sits by and watches the drama unfold.

The consequences of Mysta leaving and the message it sends about Nijisanji and how they treat their livers can't be understated.

[storkmuffin]

reading some f your kpop analysis makes me think about how you feel knowing how much this is a manufactured experience as opposed to, i guess, art derived from a singular mind? if that makes any sense.

i was never into boy bands, so i have no frame for enjoying this at all, and i wonder how you enjoy them? which you clearly do?

i guess what i mean, if everything is perfectly catered to make as much money as possible for the longest possible time, do you not feel like you are simply part of a machine instead of enjoying a bit of pop music?

I have tried to give this due consideration, and I have to say I find both things you say a bit confusing.

I like Ateez because the music feels and sounds fun to me, and many songs reverberate in my mind's ear making me want to hear it repeatedly, and the dances and the performances are delightful to my eye. We live in a world of money, so being catered to, to be provided with a thing that delights me, in exchange for money, strikes me as very fair. Artists have a right to make a profit, and companies that invest in making performing art possible also deserve to make a profit, in the same way I think my hairstylist and dentist also deserve to make profits for the valuable service they give me.

Major chunk of writing below, which you are not obligated to read at all. TLDR: All pop culture from every country is manufactured with the purpose of making as much money as possible for the longest possible time, so if someone can't like kpop for that reason they shouldn't be able to stand any other popular art form either, for the principle to hold.

About the manufactured music part/ art derived from a singular mind: No music is organic (as opposed to manufactured). All music, to sound musical, requires unnatural action or polishing of the natural. I'm also not sure how purist you're going with this singular mind definition. A folk singer performing solo with her guitar, singing songs she wrote, by herself about her own life that can be backed up with documentary evidence, live - is this the most authentic form of music? Maybe?? But is authentic in this way of being authentic necessarily the best? I would say absolutely not. This kind of singer would be trying to express her point of view. And if one isn't interested in or aliented from her particular point of view, she's irrelevant in the extreme. I also would hate to live in a world where I have to listen to only people singing alone while accompanying themselves on one instrument. What a thin soundscape that would be.

The goal of kpop on the other hand is to create music that literally everyone on the planet can get into, jump around about, and sing /shout portions of, in one way or the other. Mass appeal is the goal of this music. In order to create mass cross-national appeal, you need inputs from lots of people. It requires collaboration. There's a formula for the genre, sure, but there's a formula for rock, punk, soul, EDM, and solo pop acts, too. My point is - all of recorded music is manufactured. Kpop does not seem more manufactured to me than the Rolling Stones, and the Beatles don't seem any more authentic to me than any kpop group.

The marketing approach is what's different - western bands sell the lie of musical authenticity. Kpop doesn't market that particular lie. What kpop markets is intimacy. But in the end, same-same.

I'd go even further, and say that in some ways, the more ambitious an art form is, the more manufactured it's going to be. Kpop contains within it contemporary R&B, hip hop, Western pop music traditions and so on, but it's also musical theater, it's also vaudeville, and it has gradually built itself, over time, into full blown 'complete' entertainment. You can just listen to the music. I did this for a long time without knowing wtf any of the bands were, or if I knew the bands, I didn't care who the members were. Still don't, for most part. You can also just like it for the music videos and visual aesthetic, using the music as backdrop. OR you can go fully into the fandom experience, of understanding the 'characters' the Idols are trying to be, and now, with technology, communicating with them directly, as well as with the rest of fandom to feel like you're on the same 'team.' It can become a way to engage with the world, and allow you to meet and socialize with people you would otherwise never meet. Kpop can make itself part of your lifestyle if you want it to be.

As for money, isn't every art form is always trying to maximize its earnings in order to keep creating itself?? The performing arts require money in order to have an audience. You need a venue, to do performing arts. Money sustains performing arts. The huge funding and donation drives done by opera and ballet companies, as well as orchestras, choirs, quartets, etc, non-stop, all year round, in every possible way, is evidence of this. Catering to the paying audience in order to sustain fandom loyalty is something all pop stars the world over do, as well. Name me any popular pop artist, and I am confident I wouldn't have to do that much digging to find evidence for how hard they're working in order to make as much money as possible for as long as possible, not necessarily for greed, but so they can keep doing the thing they're doing. I think what kpop has done is just be better at marketing and mass appeal than everyone else, for this particular time in globalized culture.

The more I get to know kpop, the more thrilled I get about how by making their creation process - from selecting who will be the featured players to how they put the sounds and visuals together using various songwriters and producers- very transparent, they're puncturing the lie of 'singular' creator. To me, what western pop presents as being authentic is just as deliberately, carefully manufactured for the purposes of maximizing profit and longevity as what kpop does, but it gives itself airs that it has no right to.