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[lago-morpha]

It’s possible to diy ftm hrt???

yeah dude. you can do this all on your phone too though it is less secure to use tor on one. keep in mind it's not really the most anonymous thing to send people paypal money for crypto or use tor on your phone but the police could not give less of a shit about people buying steroids or drugs in general for personal use. if you're not selling or buying distribution amounts they doooon't care

all you have to do is download tor (google it and click the first result or use the play store)

go on tor.taxi and pick a market, open the market link in tor [I use incognito]

get a crypto wallet [I used cake wallet]

buy bitcoin/monero/whatever with a P2P market, basically crypto version of reddit marketplaces [I used localmonero and sent paypal money in exchange for monero, make sure to follow the directions the market gives you, like not sending any money unless it says it's ok, you can always cancel if you feel like you're getting scammed and make sure to pick someone with lots of reviews]

send the crypto into your wallet on the market, wait

look up testosterone and make sure that it is shipping DOMESTICALLY. don't bother with customs. keep in mind 10ml = ten doses, if you're like me and take 2[50]mg biweekly. it'll be twenty if you take it every week.

place order! just fill out your shipping info and pay lol

it's pretty simple, remember to log in and release the money once your package arrives! [go to your orders and click the button that says release funds]. the other person is waiting on their money and it's helpful to release it as soon as you get what you ordered.

I hope this helps anon

[smileythirteen]

love how btvs talks about real life issues using supernatural allegories. Or sometimes it’s not really an allegory it’s straight-up the real thing but just, supernaturally jazzed up

like “u have sex with a guy for the first time and then he suddenly treats u like dirt” or domestic abuse, or teen homelessness, or steroids on the swim team

[chrisevansonly]

𝑪𝒊𝒏𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒐𝒏 𝑺𝒑𝒊𝒄𝒆 & 𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑵𝒊𝒄𝒆 (𝒇𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒄𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒃𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒇𝒊𝒄 1)

☁︎harry styles x reader

☁︎there is nothing more comforting than the smell of cinnamon and spice to start off october

☁︎no warnings, just fluff and domesticity

☁︎day 1 of my fall celebration!! i’m so excited for this month and the fun little things i have planned, fall is my favourite season and time of year<3

There was nothing quite like the smell of cinnamon, fresh apples and the subtle hint of vanilla that had begun to filter throughout your home. It was well known that as soon as it hit October 1st, you were pulling out the fall scents, decorations and the month long baking streak would begin. Everything from pies to muffins, cookies, loaves: you name it you were probably planning to bake it. You made sure to inform Harry of this very early on in the relationship, and now nearing your 5 years together it came as no surprise to him to be hit with what he could only describe as fall on steroids. 

“I guess its October 1st then” 

Turning at the sound of his voice you smiled 

“Smells so good doesn’t it?”

“Cinnamon spice and everything nice as you always say right baby?”

Shrugging your shoulders 

“It is simply the best time of the year, and you’re in luck because I have some delicious cinnamon apple bread in the oven right now!”

Harry would be lying if he said the excitement on your face wasn’t the most adorable thing in the world. Especially when you stood in front of him with your smiley face pumpkin apron on, hair up and a little bit of flour on your cheek which he gently brushed off with his thumb.

“I do love when you bake this much…never really used to love fall this much until I met you, did you know that?”

“Really?”

Pulling you into his chest he nodded

“The time of year is pretty, and I do enjoy the fall treats, but I never appreciated it this much, and I think it’s because when I think of fall, now I think of you”

Your face flushed as you looked up at him

“And you don’t think this is too much?”

“Nothing is too much if it involves you…besides now I can’t picture our home not smelling this delicious all October or without the decorations you love so much”

“Thank you”

He chuckled softly, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear 

“For what?”

“Letting me go crazy and basically turning our home into a Martha Stewart catalogue” 

Harry threw his head back laughing, before shaking his head and bringing his lips down to yours, slowly your hands found their usual spot at the back of his neck, holding him to you. Eventually he pulled away so you could both catch your breath, the sound of the oven going off a few seconds later, the same smile of excitement spreading back across your face. Harry watched intently, leaning up against the kitchen counter, following your every move as you pulled out your loaves. The smell only causing your mouth to water, realistically you could make these recipes year round but they never hit quite as good as they did when the leaves began to change and the air got colder. 

“This needs to cool for a little while, so while that happens can you help me string the little pumpkin lights out front?”

With the puppy dog eyes you were batting at him he’d never be able to say no

“Pumpkin lights?”

He watched you smile as you walked to the dining room table and pulled out a box, sure enough inside there were little orange pumpkins that were lights, strung together with a string.

“Yes! See?! How cute are these!!”

“So cute m’love, very cute”

“Will you help me…? Pretty please?”

Harry smiled

“Well since you said pretty please..”

“Yay! Thank you!!”

He let out a laugh as you grabbed his hand and dragged him towards the front door, there was nothing else Harry loved more in the world than seeing you so elated over something as simple as pumpkin lights. What seemed like the most mundane object to others, was something of such great meaning to you, and it all tied back to the season. The season you loved and taught Harry to love too, and he’d be damned if he ever let you go, because October would never be the same without you in it.

It’s like you’ve always said, cinnamon spice and everything nice.

[looney-lovegood]

I know I'm angry but I truly need to vent. In Australia, one woman a week is murdered by her current or former spouse. On any given day, an average of 15 women will require hospital treatment as a result of domestic violence. The leading cause of death in pregnant women is being murdered by their partner/spouse. And yet, that despicable dickhead keeps popping up everywhere, talking about how being ~misgendered~ (primarily by servers who seem to speak English as a second language) is like a literal knife through his heart. A genuine act of violence inflicted upon him. The fucking male audacity. The sheer fucking gall to make such comparisons. I know women who have had knives forcefully held against their throats. I know one woman who has the scar to accompany the whole sorry tale. I remember looking at my friend Jess in her hospital bed, face swollen shut with broken ribs, the majority of her skin purple and yellow. The way it hurt her so much just to breathe. Jess is barely 5'1". She was savagely beaten by her 6'6" steroid-using boyfriend (and no, she was not aware of his haphazard cycling). If her gorgeous pitbull hadn't bitten the bastard's arm open, she wouldn't even be here to tell the story. Naturally, the pitbull was later ordered by the court to 'be destroyed', but I digress. This absolute (girl)cockwomble thinks he knows true oppression and violence, that no "cis" woman could ever comprehend what he has to face every single day. Not to sound like a moid, but spitting his face would be a waste of perfectly good saliva. Tangenitally related fact - I was 13 years old when a man tried to spit on me for the first time. TikTok bloke would not last five minutes as an adolescent girl.

[arale2126]

Cherik 「Jean-acquisition」 fic list

Went over my Pocket List and here is the list of dads!Cherik and Jean as their daughter.

For those who want to skip my personal ramblings: my absolute top top top favorites [one] [two] [three] [four]

— turning tables

I didn't even mean to search for Cherik fics at the time as I don't even ship them. The ship was huge so I had always knew of them and enjoyed watching people going crazy over them for more than a decade but I didn't get deep into the fandom or anything. Until that very fateful night. I was knee deep in Grindeldore feels for unknown reasons (still am, btw) and got a huge urge to read Dumbledore using legilimency to soothe his crying daughter. Being not the top ship as Grindeldore was, there simply wasn't any fic that fit the criteria. And what did I do? Searched the Cherik tag, obviously. It was just a logical shortcut: what telepath with kids wouldn't do that? Stayed up until 2am to finish the entire thing and the rest was history. The idea of Cherik with wee!Jean had taken root like the most normal thing on Earth.

— An Earlier Heaven

Pre-DOFP so Erik is characterized as only borderline-abusive instead of, you know, full blown, Charles-need-to-file-a-restraining-order-against-his-ex-who-is-incapable-of-being-anything-but-angry kind of abusiveness.

— Red Riding Hood | 5 times Jean said something embarrassing + 1 she didn't

pure chaos wee!Jean crack and two very embarrassed and exasperated dads

— Looking Forwards (Backwards)

grown-up!Jean reminisces about growing up with Charles and Erik as she fills in for all the history that Logan has missed after DOFP. I wish it was longer because it's so sweet and warms my heart.

— Four times Erik was called dad and one time he was called husband

fluff domestic ASMR basically

— Rest of their Lives

Prompt from Mnemo_ink: After Jean destroys Vuk by letting the Phoenix force free, the light descends back on Earth and envelops Charles. When the light fades away, Charles has a baby in his arms: it's Jean. I can't describe how much I love this idea. It's a cultural thing, I think. There is a notion that if the bond between people are strong enough, it would continue lives after lives. Whatever you incarnates into in the next life, in one way or another, you would find a way to be back together again and again. This prompt reflects that idea really well. Of billions others on Earth, once again, Charles is chosen. He is forgiven. He gets a chance at redemption, to be a father again. It is just indescribably beautiful to me.

— To Love and Be Loved

👌🏼👏🏼😫 have to use emojis because i'm lost for words at how *chef kiss this is. It's domestic fluff on steroid strapped to a rocket. 「 of course erik would give the kids little metal tokens so he could always sense them--and there is some COMPLICATED meta to be written here about how charles's wheelchair binds them together too 」

— For I Mean to Conquer Troy

This fic purifies my heart and ascends me. It's like I'm wrapped around by warm comfort and soothing lullabies. You know how in First Class Charles tells Erik "There is good, too. I felt it." That is the Erik in this fic, the characterization that is grossly overlooked, I dare say. And the author predicts who he could be in Apocalypse in 2011 as well. 👏🏼

[rauthschild]

We recently reposted news of an important Circuit Court reversal that affirmed the literal fact that mRNA injections are not "vaccines" by function and definition, and covered expert testimony from the creator of the mRNA product admitting that it is a bioweapon covered under the domestic biowarfare program that these mercenaries have attempted to legalize. 

Today, we bring more good news from the Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals -- the First Amendment guarantees owed to American Physicians have been upheld.  

They cannot be muzzled and punished and prevented from bringing forward their analysis of Covid-19 or anything else by unelected and unauthorized medical certification boards threatening to take away their medical credentials. 

As Americans, we are wondering exactly how such a situation could ever be allowed to exist, wherein certification boards issuing credentials for medical professionals could be turned into and used as instruments of political coercion.  

This, like so many other terrible institutions, comes to us directly from J.D. Rockefeller and his progeny, misusing their private fortunes to promote political and social and economic injustice. 

For those who are unacquainted with history, J.D. Rockefeller was the Chairman and lead shareholder of Standard Oil.  Standard Oil was not really an oil company despite the name.  It was a pipeline company in the business of building and installing and connecting oil pipelines and oil transfer systems. 

Rockefeller gained a choke hold and dictatorial power over who could move oil where and when and how much, and so, established an oil transfer monopoly by which he could dictate the ability of actual oil companies to deliver on their contracts. 

Standard Oil was busted as a monopoly in the 1920's. The disgraced moguls retreated to Europe and started the International Monetary Fund (IMF)--- and together with their European friends, the Rothschilds, they did the same thing to the banking industry that they had already been convicted of doing to the oil industry. 

These transfer control monopolies are unlawful, illegal, and immoral, but unbelievable as this is, they got away with it again in another industry, and weren't called out for it until 2015.  

They used Standard Oil to create a transfer and use monopoly on oil, and a transfer and use monopoly in the banking industry by controlling bank transfers through SWIFT....

Look around and what do you see?   Public utility monopolies.  Public transit monopolies. 

These are all very much in the same vein: 

In all these cases, a vital commodity -- oil, money, electricity, telecommunications, transportation -- is monopolized indirectly by controlling access to it.  

Could you indirectly monopolize the supply of medical doctors and apply coercion to them to assure that they recommend (and by omission of other options, induce the Public to buy) your drugs, your therapies and approved "countermeasures"?  

Enter the American Medical Association, the American Board of Internal Medicine, the American Board of Family Medicine, the American Board of Obstetrics and Gynecology -- and, of course, the Food and Drug Administration.  

Here's your pipeline system on steroids, controlling the supply and therefore access to medical services, defining the kind of medical service available, and dictating the availability and use of drugs and therapeutic protocols.  

All these "Professional Associations" and "Credential Boards" have been bank-rolled on Rockefeller money and "Federal" Grants -- that have also been largely awarded based on compliance with "standards" imposed by these same bogus "industry authorities" and promoted by the same monopoly interests. 

These "Professional Associations" and "Credential Boards" and unaccountable  "Administrations" were sold to the Public as watch dogs acting in the Public Interest.  

Instead, they have acted in the interest of unscrupulous and largely veiled corporate monopoly interests for profiteering and purposes of political coercion.  

As usual, the Perpetrators have used "storefronts" and proxies to do their dirty work, setting up these sanctimonious hidden monopolies to excuse, whitewash, and promote their criminal profiteering and political agendas.  

These self-important Associations and Agencies purportedly here to protect the Public from quackery and incompetence, dangerous drugs and fraud, have instead willingly promoted all the above, and worse, have expedited and unleashed an actual biowarfare program against the American Public -- for profit. 

Over the past five years these hidden monopolies have murdered millions of innocent people and maimed and poisoned millions more for profit -- and laughed all the way to the bank in the name of protecting the victims.  

They even charged you for killing your family, your friends, and your neighbors.  Ask Joe Biden and Donald Trump about the billions (with a "b") of Covid injections and PCR Tests they bought. Who paid for that?  Who profited from that? 

Their fellow-franchise pals in the Mockingbird Media have helped out by trying to cover it all up. Down play it. Spin it. Bury it, like the victims.  

These organizations are identified as Criminal Monopoly Interests so far as the American Government is concerned. They failed to protect the Public Interest to such a fantastical degree that there is no coming back. 

Like the American Bar Association, the American Medical Association needs to be dismantled and held accountable, along with these politicized Certification Boards, and the complicit Agencies. 

This Notification of Liability is not limited to pandemic injuries and may be freely applied to private monopolies and corporate government offices, agencies, and departments that create regulatory monopolies -- and which as incorporated entities, do not enjoy any degree of State Immunity. 

This Notification of Liability also applies to any incorporated court, insurance fund, or pension fund profiting from a direct or indirect monopoly.  

Promotion of Monopoly Interests, establishment of Monopolies, control of Monopoly Interests, creating a Monopoly by indirect means, obstructing the free flow of trade and commerce, impersonating a public government institution, office, department, or agency, establishing or enforcing fraudulent regulatory controls, engaging in monopoly inducement, and profiting from a monopoly are all Federal Crimes.  

Notice to Principals is Notice to Agents; Notice to Agents is Notice to Principals.

The United States of North America, in the Family of Nations, Law of Nations

[healthlineonline]

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[mattnben-bennmatt]

Ben Affleck on some advice he gave Matt Damon

From the SmartLess podcast, hosted by Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, and Will Arnett (3 April 2023)

-

WILL: You gave [Matt] a piece of advice that he has since paid forward and given. And he let us in on it last year, when he came to join us. Which was, apparently you said to him, "If somebody asks you to do something down the road, [...] imagine that you would have to do it tomorrow, and then let that be your answer." [...] BEN: Yeah, I did give him that— I never thought that was particularly wise. I just thought— Because Matt was constantly saying yes, and then be like, "Hey, man. Can you call them and tell them I'm sick?" [...] The thing about that that I can't completely cosign—and my dirty little secret is—I might pass on everything. I almost never want to get off the couch.

-

[Previously in the same interview]

BEN: [Matt] was a lot smarter about [acting] than me. He understood a lot earlier on. He was like, "It’s just all about the director. I’m just gonna focus on the direct.” He was like passing on parts when we were broke. “What are you passing on? You can’t pay the gas bill! How is this not good enough for you?” [...] I was like, “I’m doing after-school specials about steroid abuse, and you’re passing on movies.”

-

I found this little clip super interesting. First, we have another example of Ben's advice sticking with Matt, so much so that he keeps spreading it decades later—à la "Judge me for how good my good ideas are, not how bad my bad ideas are."

Then, we're gifted with the adorable picture of Matt regularly coming to Ben, asking him to break off Matt's plans for him. There's something very intimate and domestic about it. And Ben being protective of Matt's time and well-being and teaching him to say "no"? Amazing!

Finally, we have the apparent contradiction of Matt needing to learn to say "no" in the first place, when earlier in the interview Ben makes it clear he was much better than him at turning down parts. I don't know in what context Matt communicated this advice to the hosts of the SmartLess podcast. I could not find any mention of it when I listened to Matt Damon's episode. In Ben's episode, Jason Bateman gives an example of following this advice for what sounds like a professional commitment. But given that Ben just relayed how discerning Matt was about taking on acting jobs, maybe Matt was constantly saying yes in other contexts.

Regardless, I am endeared by the contrasts within and between them: Matt, who says "yes" to everything, but says "no" to a lot of movies, but also completely buries himself in his work. And Ben, who teaches Matt how to say "no", but would say "yes" to all work in the early days, but who also never wants to get off the couch.

[crmsnmth]

September Sky Chapter Seven, Part 1

"It is too. Hear me out," I said, almost spilling the cup of coffee sitting on the metal table in front of me. I was animated.

"Fine, I'll hear this crazy theory," Chad cut his laughter. We were meeting with Alana in a few hours. Chad had come early intentionally so we could hang out for a bit, just the two of us. Catch up. And we had done that, and now things were back to as if there never was any distance in this friendship.

"How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad? Trying hard not to smile, though I feel bad. I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral. Can't understand what I mean? Well, you soon will. That's all I should have to say. He's basically saying he's going to laugh at her funeral. The narrator of the song killed her. In each chorus he's telling you what stage he's at." We were sitting outside a local cafe called Fuel. It was a coffee shop on steroids, and their coffee was a hundred times better than the chain store Collectivo Coffee. It wasn't even a contest.

"You need to go outside more," Chad said deadpan. Chad was a bigger guy, but then again everyone seemed bigger than me. His shoulder length hair was held back in a high ponytail. A thick yet trimmed and taken care of beard covered the bottom half of his face. Without it, his face matched that of a five year old's. He was dressed in all black. The uniform of the alternative children.

"That's your reply? Come on. That song is about a domestic murder. Otherwise that line is pointless."

"Have you listened to the lyrics? I think it's supposed to be pointless."

"That's what I always thought too, but then I really listened to it. It's about murder, dude." I will die on this hill. That song is 100% about a domestic murder. Do not try me, I will argue this forever.

"You're really stretching. The verses aren't about murder. They don't even make sense." Chad said, taking a drink of his coffee. It didn't matter that it was close to 80 degrees out, we were still drinking hot coffee. Outside and in the sun, even. Fuel always put up some metal tables and some very uncomfortable metal chairs.

"Exactly. They're to throw you off the actual words. The verses weren't ever supposed to make sense. It's just adrenaline rushed nonsense. Just a distraction to the chorus and bridges." Every table outside was full. But it was also a nice day out. People walked up and down the sidewalks. Somewhere near, music was pumped into the air.

"You really need to get outside. Leave the house sometimes." Chad said.

"I do."

"I mean, more than just Addison's place and work."

"I'm at Fuel right now."

"Would you be here if I wasn't here?"

"It's possible. Hey, I have three places I could be in. There's nothing wrong with that." I said defiantly.

"You think of some weird shit." Chad laughed.

"So I've been told."

A couple walking hand and hand passed by our table. They were talking with exaggerated movements. For once I smiled at seeing it. It may not have been all that much of a change, but even a subtle change towards being healthier was a plus. The fact that I could see a couple and not feel the deep dark well open up in my stomach was a huge fact to me.

"How's things been with Addison anyway?" Chad asked

"Really good. I invited her to tag alone if she wanted, but she's on-call so she really can't."

"On call?"

[veryace-ficrecs]

IT Outsider POV Fic Recs

This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :) 

these idiosyncrasies didn't hide a thing by secxosatellite - Rated T

There's only a few things that Edward Kaspbrak's coworkers can definitively say they know about him.

One; he was good at his job. Like super damn good.

Two; that comes hand-in-hand with the fact that it seemed like he had a stick up his ass all the time.

Three; he was married. But for some reason, no one knows anything at all about his spouse.

And finally, fourth, sounding completely out of place from everything else they know about him; he likes Richie Tozier, the comedian. Dick jokes and all.

☆

Five (5) times Eddie's coworkers wonder about Eddie's strange obsession with Richie Tozier, that one famous stand-up comedian, and one (1) time they understand why.

Eddie Kaspbrak, Office Uncle Extraordinaire by kyaticlikestea - Rated T

Eddie has a surprising amount of muscle definition going on in the forearm region. Jamie has witnessed, on four separate occasions, someone do a double take at Eddie’s forearm. Karen from HR still bears the nickname ‘Mugbreaker’ after Eddie turned the corner near her office, coming face to face with her just as he rubbed a hand through the hair at the nape of his neck, exposing the wiry flex of muscle between wrist and elbow, and Karen famously dropped a cup of coffee all over the floor. Ergo, either Eddie goes to the gym, or he’s on steroids.

Eddie is the kind of man who keeps a makeshift itemised medicine cabinet in his third desk drawer, with a padlock on the handle, the key for which he keeps in the inside pocket of his suit jacket, and who administers a library style check-out system of medication whenever anyone asks for a Paracetamol.

Eddie is probably not on steroids.

Eddie's coworker finally convinces him to bring his elusive spouse to an office party. It goes about as well as you might expect, which is to say spectacularly.

Domestic Affairs by fairychangeling - Rated T

Myra Kaspbrak worked part time. She only came in on Monday, Wednesday and in the afternoon on Thursday.

That was because Myra’s husband was sick.

**

Eddie and Myra's marriage and divorce as seen through the eyes of Myra's colleague.

love is the thing with wings (tweet tweet, richie) by lizifer - Rated T

no · @raisedbyparrots•  5 h

 stuck in the window seat beside a sad tall dude who has 85 elbows somehow, thank god this is a short flight

 this is interesting- he's writing a text message LOVE CONFESSION and is concentrating so hard on it that I don't think he's noticed me reading every word 👀

 Love interest is named EDDIE, and he has a WIFE #planemanloveseddie

I killed a clown. AMA! by liesmyth - Rated T

I (39M) got stabbed twice today and now I want a divorce. Help?

Or: the one where Eddie is on Reddit.

Playing for Keeps by LogicalBookThief - Rated T

"Before the break, we asked our contestants: who was your first love? Richie, what did you write?"

 Your mom

"Heh. That's what we get for inviting a comedian on the show," Chet snorts. "Very mature, Mr. Trashmouth. Maybe your partner can illuminate us. You guys were childhood friends, right? So fill us in, Eddie. Who was Richie's first love?"

Rolling his eyes, Eddie flips over his card.

 My mom

* * Richie and Eddie go on a game show for couples. Nobody expects them to be such a dream team. And nobody suffers as much as the host.

Eddie's Famous Husband by schrijverr - Rated G

Eddie loves his husband and all his coworkers know that, because he loves talking about Richie. He just forgot to mention that his husband is famous comedian Richie Tozier. 

Observations on the Life of Edward Kaspbrak by fourteentrout - Rated G

When he's not busy hating his job, loving his girlfriend, and trying his best not to get caught gossiping with his work friends, Advik Kavali observes his weird boss. 

That Was Interesting... by smileyhobihoya - Rated T

The next day she makes a list on her phone about what she knows about Edward Kaspbrak

1. He has a husband 2. His husband calls him ‘Spaghetti’ and ‘Eds’ 3. He almost died 4. He cusses like a sailor when talking to said husband  

Not a very long list

--------------------------

Or Julie's new boss doesn't mention anything about his home life but Julie wants to get to the bottom of it

you're giving me some mean butterflies by robertmontauk - Rated T

"What’s going on in that weird old brain of yours?”

His shrug is stuttered and he avoids looking at her — Richie Tozier is many things, but a good liar is not one of them. “Me? Brain? Nah. Nothin’ up here. Ahaha.”

Bev’s eyebrows shoot up. “Did you just say ‘ahaha’ out loud? Did you get replaced by a fuckboy or a hey mamas lesbian on your way over?”

The Courtship of Edward Kaspbrak, Executive Asshole by queerxqueen - Rated T

Two weeks into her new job as Executive Assistant to the world's most anal-retentive, pent-up ball of pure fury and finance expertise known as Mr. Edward Kaspbrak, Lucy thought she was coming to grips with her boss's particular brand of crazy. Edward was in his office reaming some poor associate for “desecrating the carefully organized sanctity of his spreadsheets” the first time she encountered Richie Tozier.

When he walked up to her desk with two bursting bags of takeout, wearing a “Nobody Knows I’m Gay” t-shirt under a garish yellow short-sleeved button up with a pattern of little dinosaurs across it, and old Converse sneakers with the soles falling out from under him, Lucy almost called security.

“Why, hello, Madame Secretary,” he said. “I’m looking for Mister Eds Spagheds.” He flourished the takeout bags with a little bow. She recognized the familiar logo of Edward’s favorite Thai place, the one that was across town that she had to pay an Uber Eats guy double to venture out to, because her life was a nightmare.

pink cheeks, gold band by petalloso - Rated G

She doesn’t mean to eavesdrop. It just happens. Mr. Kaspbrak is hunched over in the corner of the hallway, speaking softly into the phone pressed to his ear. “I wish you were here, ” he says, his next words punctuated by pauses as the person at the other end speaks. “Yeah, she’s here. You asked her to come see me, didn’t you? Uh hu. I know. Okay, yeah. Okay. I love you.”

As she watches this, she wonders who the woman is, that was going to marry him, because his right ring finger glints with a gold band, and she had seen the post-its on magazines for cakes and suits and and flowers on his office desk. And sometimes during a meeting she caught him twisting the ring with his thumb. Who, she thought, made him so gooey, and happy, and made his voice sound that way, and his cheeks and nose dusted with a ruddy, pleased pink?