#Do you want to bring back the fucking Hays Code? Because this is how you get the fucking Hays Code

[malice-mercy-miracle]

I normally stay out of interpersonal fandom drama because it's exhausting, pointless, and I'm too old for that shit. But I've been in online fandom spaces to varying degrees for about 20 years, and my short stint with the Bad Omens Tumblr fandom thus far is, without question, the most toxically selfish and immature community I have every stepped foot in. And I was in the A:TLA ship wars.

I'm going to try to keep this very simple.

Don't like; don't read. I truly cannot fathom the fact that this aspect of fandom etiquette has fallen by the wayside. If you don't like fic/art/ships/tropes or whatever else, just don't look at it. It's that simple.

You are responsible for your own triggers. Now this comes with a heavy caveat, in that anyone writing dark/traumatic content should tag it as such. But ultimately each individual is responsible for their own mental health. If a fiction has dark content and has appropriate warnings, just don't read it and you won't be triggered. If a fic has dark content and it's not tagged, politely ask the author to use appropriate warnings. And if they refuse? BLOCK THEM. Because 1) that's bad etiquette on their part, and 2) blocking someone who typically posts triggering content is a great way to not deal with triggering content!

Writing about illegal things is not illegal. I can't believe I have to say this. Depiction of illegal, taboo, or harmful things in media is allowed. The only context in which it should reasonably be constrained is when the target demographic is likely to try to replicate it - AKA children's media. I'm pretty sure no one here is an eight year old?

People can have any variety of reasons to read or write taboo, traumatic, or illegal content into their fics. It's not your business why they do it. Genuinely. You are not entitled to that information. Nobody owes you justification.

Harassment IS illegal. Sending people repeated hate messages, threats, comments on their children or personal lives, etc. could all be construed as harassment and is actually fucking illegal. You do not respond to someone portraying something taboo, triggering, or "but that's illegal!" in a work of fiction by harassing them until they leave the fandom space because they feel unsafe. Given that these behaviors are typically happening on anon, I'm pretty sure you know this.

I'm coming at this as someone who is not only in fandom spaces, but also reading, writing, and reviewing outside of fandom. I have read books that contain wildly problematic content, but there's still a time and place for how I respond to that. I don't send authors anonymous hate mail because their book had a gratuitous SA scene for cheap drama; I write a professional review calling it out, explaining why it's an issue in terms of how it's framed and in context with the genre and target demographic, and I do what I can to make sure there's content warnings available for future readers.

Now you might be thinking, "This is Tumblr. We don't have any professional review spaces here."

You'd be right.

Because this is fandom. We're talking about fanfic. Something people write for shits and giggles as a hobby. For free. Chill the fuck out.

Anyway, that's my piece. Any and all vitriol or I Have Zero Reading Comprehension responses to this will be blocked/reported as needed. ✌️

Edit: Also wanted to add really quick: YOU CAN STILL BLOCK AND REPORT PEOPLE ON ANON. Here's a guide.

[thegayestofagendas]

Seeing people with "proship dni" in their bio specifically interacting with my posts is still so fucking funny. I personally really don't care if you interact with me, but I'll be taking your advice.

Also it will never not be fucking weird to see fans of horror and creature features have problems with "proship". Be fucking serious buddy, horror is the problematic genre. Like I don't want to be all high and mighty, but in my short yet devastating stay in an "anti" community, aside from having fun being virtually banned, I certainly would not have been caught dead enjoying a little gore, a little monstrous monster, a violent haunting. The most extreme you could get was a little halloween special. You should not be with the "anti problematic" people. Just join me in the pool.

Idk it always seems pretty funny to me seeing "proship dni" from accounts gushing over the magnus archives or death by dying podcasts because "antis" as far as I've seen fucking hate redemption and character growth or, on the flip side, descents into becoming worse. How do you enjoy the events of Magnus Archives? Idk... I dont really want to know because more power to you, but like... if in 2011-2012 I had encountered them and I had enjoyed them like I did in 2019 to now, I would have felt sick to my stomach as soon as something a little fucked up happened for the sake of enjoyment.

(I do feel sick to my stomach when I hear the sounds or the voice talents of Magnus Archives now, but it's more because I originally listened to it during one of the most stressful times of my life and my brain just goes back to that state when I hear them, I wish I could hear their voices again without this happening)

Horror, psychological or physical, and creature features, just don't fit with an "anti problematic" mindset in my opinion.

Tho I guess if you think we might need to bring back some of the hays code, you might appreciate hays code era horror in a completely different way than I do.

[lilac-castle-in-the-sky]

Ulterior motives - part two

Summary: An unexpected opportunity and a hard choice to make, will the reader follow the path of the rightgeous or give in to temptation?

warnings: reader has a bit of a villain arc, swearing, violence, smut, unprotected sex, zemo eats ass, fingering, dirty talk, age gap, John Walker.

A small but important note: So apparently Daniel Bruhl is in my city this weekend to speak at some conferences at the Hay Festival and i only realized because i saw him today from afar just walking around the general vicinity where this is taking place and i got the feeling that if we made eye contact he would know so i spent the rest of my day feeling self-conscious about this fic lol.

Part 1

Sam and Bucky were mad at Zemo after his little stunt at Madripoor, you couldn't say you blamed him for his decision, or that you hadn't seen it coming, as soon as he started wandering around the lab, letting Sam and Bucky take control of the interrogation you knew he was plotting something, but by the time you tried to warn Sam it was too late.

At least he was consistent, you could admire conviction in a person, much like Steve Rogers, Zemo had a strict moral code he adhered himself to, albeit way less altruistic, few people from your old life believed in a thing the same way he did, and well, apart from Sam, so adamant about saving the little psycho running around playing revolution, you hadn't met anyone else who did.

Donya was your only piece of the puzzle now, but with the last couple of days being so intense with the traveling and fighting, you all agreed a few hours of leisure in the Baron's fancy apartment was much needed for the mission.

If Sam and Bucky had heard your nightly activities in Madripoor, they had said nothing about them, but this entire mission had you thinking about what you were going to do once everything was over and you had to go back to the States, and Sam, being the type of friend that he was, had noticed you were quieter than usual, so he waited until Bucky went out and Zemo occupied himself in the kitchen to take a seat next to you on the couch.

“Are you ok?” It was so weird to have someone asking you that question, even after all the time you spend with him moving from one place to the next, that kind of company and friendship still felt foreign.

“I told you I can handle Zemo, stop worrying” the man in question was currently opening and closing kitchen cabinets, mumbling about Turkish delights.

“You know I didn't bring you here to be my bodyguard right? Just for the muscle. I know you are having a hard time adjusting back in the States, i thought you needed the reminder that you did the right thing once and it was the correct choice”

“I know” you didn’t regret joining them when you did, or helping out with Thanos later, but the aftermath of your good choices had been unexpectedly underwhelming.

“But it is a choice you gotta keep on making, y/n” you groaned, falling back against the couch.

“I'm trying” you said, finally able to look Sam in the eye, his hands were full enough already, he didn’t need to worry about your own internal drama.

“Your boss told Sarah you threatened a client”

“He was trying to use an expired coupon and started calling me names when i wouldn’t let him!”

“it happens, i get it, people are dumb like that, but you can’t threaten every client that comes into the store with an irrational request” in your mind if you did it enough times maybe they would stop coming, but you could see how that would be bad for business.

“listen i know you have your own internal struggle with being Captain America and what not but….your government, they don’t want me to do good things, or to be the good guy, do you know how many times i found CIA operatives fucking shit up in other countries? If this is the correct choice, why doesn’t it feel like it?” he seemed to think about it for a second, sinking down into the couch with you, he gave you a soft smile and sat up straight with new resolve.

“I'll find something when we go back, I promise" he chuckled and stood up, giving you a friendly pat on the shoulder "If not for your sake, for your poor customers”

“Sam?" he turned around "thank you for worrying” you had the urge to say sorry too, but couldn't figure out why.

Bucky came back not much later, putting a time constraint on your mission with the information about the Dora coming to take Zemo, you were smart enough to know that wasn't a problem you could punch your way out of, either you found Karli or they would take your golden goose, Zemo however seemed not at all worried to have the Wakandans after him, which made you believe he had a plan.

you kept an eye on him on your way to the refugee camp, you knew he wouldn't try to scape until he could make sure the super soldier serum was destroyed, but he was also a methodical man, if he was going to scape he was probably already moving all the pieces on his board, and if he could plan 3 moves ahead, it was your job to plan 5.

You didn't see any harm in him wandering off to talk to the children, you hadn't miss the sadness in his tone when he explained the sweets he kept in a jar had once been his son's favorite, you knew what it was like to lose people you loved, the longing for the warm feelings they once provoked paired with the fear of losing it all over again, maybe that was the reason why you felt so uncomfortable with your new life, it was starting to resemble a life you had once loved and lost, you had always thought you weren't the kind of person to run away from your problems, but maybe you were wrong.

You realized too late of his true intentions, by the time you came close to the small group of children he had gathered, they were already running off with the pile of candy the Baron had used to bribe them, the smile he gave you as he stood up only confirmed the fact that he had managed to get the upper hand, so you returned to the apartment with no other alternative than to wait for the memorial service to happen.

Bucky went out again after losing his temper and breaking one of Zemo's teacups, you gave him a bad look as the super soldier left the place and then observed as Sam retired himself to one of the rooms to work on his wings, he definitely knew how to push their buttons, but he had yet to learn how to push yours. You took the cherry blossom tea he was offering and sat on one of the stools by the kitchen isle, observing him as you took a sip of tea with enough of a death glare to make him uncomfortable

“I don't expect your motivations to align with ours" you started "but Sam and Bucky are my friends, so if you do something to hurt them, or that could cause them to get hurt, i will make you pay"

He observed you, brown analytical eyes scanning your face, but your expression didn’t change, you needed him to know you were serious, and a few orgasms weren’t enough to make you forget who he was.

"Understood" he said finally, and took a sip of his tea, you nodded.

You hopped off the stool and looked around before finally deciding you were in the mood for a long bath, he had been spending a lot of time in that bathroom so the tub was probably heavenly.

“Do you have any clean towels in there? I want to take a bath” you asked, pointing to the door, the Baron’s head tilted as a grin transformed his lips.

“I know something to help you relax even better”

You laughed.

“An orgasm won’t make forget who you are, Helmut”

“Just one?” he teased, smiling even wider when he noticed the blush taking over your cheeks “my hours of freedom are counted y/n, won’t you grant me one last wish?”

“Depends” you said playfully as you approached him.

“On what?” he grabbed your waist to push you closer to him.

“On what I’ll get in return” you got close, lingering over his lips as a smile grew on your lips, his hands dug into your waist.

“I promise you’ll like it” his voice was a whisper, and then you were kissing.

Hungry, passionate kisses as he guided you towards the master bedroom and then into the bathroom, he kissed you like it was the last time, like the moment he let you go you would evaporate in front of his eyes, his hands moved up your body to cup your face and hold you in place when the need for air became too big to ignore, he kept you in place, foreheads touching as you recovered your breath.

You tried to take your clothes off, but he stopped you, gently lowering your hand he whispered close to your face “let me”

His eyes were very intimidating, in the best way possible, even while fully dressed his brown gaze made you feel completely naked. He didn’t take his eyes off yours as he took of your shirt, his stare only interrupted when he passed it over your head, he didn’t lose any intensity as his hands moved around your body and to your back, unclasping your bra, his fingertips dancing lightly over your skin as he took the straps off your shoulders, it was impossible to hide the shivers.

You kicked off your shoes when he started unbuttoning your pants, he pulled them down along with your underwear, maintain eye contact even as he kneeled in front you and brushed the tip of his nose lightly against your naked sex, with your center already throbbing with need, you gasped at the contact and he smiled.

“my turn” you whispered, pulling him up, he didn’t protest when you started taking of his shirt, looking straight into his brown eyes like he had done with you, you took your time touching the naked skin of his torso you hadn’t touched before, feeling the way his breaths got shorter and shallower.

You could feel his hardness pressing against his pants when you started to unbuckle his belt, you maintained his gaze as you lowered yourself, pulling them down along with his underwear and leaving his erect dick right in front your face, you took him into your mouth and it was him the first to break the eye contact, throwing his head back and whispering in sokovian.

You took in as much as you could and then backed away, working your tongue around his tip and sucking it, he opened his eyes to look at you again, he gathered your hair with one hand and started to guide you to take more of him, gently pushing you until you gagged, he let you go back to the tip before pushing you again to go further each time until your eyes started to water and his dick hit the back your throat.

He groaned, keeping you in place with your nose touching his base until tears blurred your vision and then let go, letting you work him with your mouth and hands pushing him almost off the edge.

“You have a sinful mouth, krasivaya” he pulled you up, wiping the last of your tears with a gentle hand “how should I reward it?”

He kissed you then and started to walk you to the shower, closing the glass door behind him, he turned you around and started kissing your neck, he reached around your body with one of his hands to pinch your nipple and used the other to turn on the shower, but not even the water suddenly falling over you was enough to distract from the way his mouth moved in your neck, on the weak spot right behind you ear as he switched his hand to give attention to your other nipple. You didn't realize the showerhead was mobile and he had taken it out of the base until you felt the water teasing your inner thighs.

the first contact of the pressurized water with your core almost made you come, you fell forward to lean against the wall, feeling Zemo pressing his body against yours to give you more support, he moved the showerhead closer to your cunt making an almost pathetic moan escape you lips.

He moved the shower head then to make the water fall all over your body, your shoulders and abdomen and your already weak legs before teasing its return towards your cunt, the feeling making your legs shake and then gone when he moved the shower head again. You felt his other hand over your body, washing you with liquid body wash, slowly torturing you with every brush of his fingers against your skin as he teased you with the pressurized water on his other hand.

You held onto his wrist to keep him in place.

“I thought you wanted to shower” he whispered in your ear, doing circular motions with his hand, making it harder for you to answer.

“I wanted to take a bath”

“Isn’t this better?” it was, it was a thousand times better, until he moved his hand again letting the water fall over your inner tight, you let out a pathetic whine.

“Fuck! Helmut, let me come please”

“How can I say no when you ask so nicely?” he aligned himself with your entrance and entered you as his other hand directed the water at your cunt again, you moaned, moving your hips to meet his as the combination of the stimulation over your clit and him going in and out of you pushed you over the edge.

He didn’t gave you any time to catch a breath, turning you around again he grabbed one of your legs and hooked it around his hips to give him a better angle, he grabbed your face to make you look at him and only then he entered you in one swift motion.

You gasped, eyes widening as your pussy stretched around his length, you tried to throw your head back but his grip on your face wouldn’t give.

“No, no, no, no look at me” he moved inside you, drawing pleasure from the way your expression colored with ecstasy with each thrust, he started to say things in sokovian you couldn’t understand, he leaned in to whisper them into your ear and the only thing you could master as a response was to moan his name "you're fucking beautiful like this"

He held onto you, going faster and deeper until you walls started to pulse around him again, he moved his hand between your bodies to rub on your clit, so very sensible and responsive, you came with a cry, an almost painful pleasure as he readjusted your leg to be able to reach that spot inside of you that made you keep seeing stars and prolonged your orgasm enough for him to release his seed inside.

He caressed your cheek as he dropped your leg to the ground, kissed you again and washed you and himself and held your hand to help you step out of the shower, he was a perfect gentleman and it confused you. How could someone so ruthless be so gentle?

“My clothes are in the guest room” you said, he wrapped a towel around your body and used it to push you closer to him.

“Does that mean I get to keep you here for as long as I want?”

“No” you tried to push him away, but failed when his head fell to your neck and he started kissing the weak spot behind your ear.

“I think it does” he kept on kissing you, pulling the towel until you both fell in the bed and kept kissing even then until you were both out of breath, tangled around each other.

You stopped for a moment, examining his face, you couldn’t resist the urge to pass your hand over his hair to mess it up, or descend your finger over the side of his face, feeling the stubble he had yet to shave, his head tilted to the side and you could feel the question coming.

“Would you take the serum if you had the chance?” It made you laugh despite the seriousness of his tone.

“I would be a menace” the old you would’ve taken it, it could make you job a lot easier, and having superpowers was objectively cool, but the new you thought about the consequences of her actions more thoroughly …sometimes “I don’t have enough trust in my good qualities to do it”

It was weird to realize how much you had learned about Zemo in so little time, he didn’t say anything, but looking at his expression you realized he believed you, and respected you for it.

“Are you really going to let the Dora Milaje take you?” you knew it was a bold thing to ask, and for a moment you thought he wouldn’t answer, but he did, being honest with you for whatever reason.

“I no longer have a country to serve or a family to protect, after my mission with Karli is done I’ll pay for what I did” you rolled over on the bed to look at the ceiling, you had told Steve something similar when you decided to follow him, wanting to redeem your past sins by helping them, Natasha had recognized the burden you were carrying and accepted you with open arms.

“I don’t have one either” you confessed “country or family. When this is done, I’m going to leave”

Perhaps it wasn’t such a great idea to open your heart to a man that used secrets to manipulate people, but he was the only person you felt good confessing your thoughts to, he didn’t say anything more, and you stayed in the bed looking at the ceiling until it was time to go again.

You found an unpleasant surprise on the way to the memorial, or rather, it found you. John Walker in the middle of the street in full clown costume, proudly displaying the shield he didn’t deserve on his back, helmet on like he expected to find himself in the middle of a fight at any moment for whatever reason, he walked towards you, laser focused on Zemo until he seemed to register the fact that there was a person in the group he had never met before.

Your luck had run out, sadly. John walker was the result of a machine constructed to protect the interest of a few at the expense of the many, and you would've felt bad for him had he possessed even an ounce of self-awareness.

"Who the hell is she?” with you right in front of his face there was no need to address the other men present.

“An independent contractor, who the hell are you?” It was impossible not to know who John Walker was with the propaganda machine working so hard to make him look like a hero, but you knew how much it would bother a guy like him if someone didn't know his name.

“Great, so you break Zemo out of prison and then hire a hitman” he didn't have to be an asshole about it, he chose to.

“Not a hitman boy, but i can be if you don’t get out of our way” you took a step towards him, but felt Sam's hand pulling you back.

“Not now” he whispered, you hoped it meant you could do it later.

Walker and Jenkins joined your group then as you followed the little girl Zemo had bribed to take you to the memorial, she led you to a back entrance, to a room full of old machinery and you kept quiet as Sam negotiated with Walker for some time to reason with Karli, you thought he needed to stop picking up strays and making them his responsibility, but you weren’t going to argue with him on it since you were currently one of those people.

Zemo got handcuffed to one of the machines, which got a chuckle from you, and then Walker started pacing around the room adjusting every button and belt on his uniform like he were about to face the Chitauri all by himself. He clearly had issues that the people in charge were apparently not interested in solving.

And then, he started to push Bucky, you were planning on staying quiet, not wanting to provoke a fight within the group while Sam was trying to do the right thing, but Walker started to guilt trip him, which you weren’t going to accept.

“Sam said to wait, so we wait, he can handle himself” Walker scoffed at you, but didn’t get out of Bucky’s face.

“C’mon Barnes, you know this isn’t right” you could see Bucky’s jaw pressed so tightly together his teeth had to be hurting, the plates on his metal arm shifting as he opened and closed his fist, he didn’t dare to look at you, and you knew he had made up his mind.

“You don’t need to go Bucky” you tried, but there was determination in his eyes when he looked in your direction.

“I trust Sam, I do, but I don’t trust Karli” you didn’t trust her either but you thought if someone could reason with her it would be him.

“You can watch him if you don’t want to come” Walker ordered, pointing in Zemo’s direction, who had been oddly quiet during the entire exchange.

You observed as the three of them went after Sam and took a deep breath, the plan had gone to shit in less than half an hour and now you were stuck as a babysitter. You turned to the Baron, everything was fucked up already, there was not much damage he could do.

"Do you need any help with that?" you asked, right as he freed himself from the handcuff, it had been naïve of Walker to believe a former high ranking military officer like him would be stopped by a pair of handcuffs.

"No, i will present however, my most sincere apologies" it took you a second too long to register his words, by the time you processed what was happening he was already bending your arm behind your back and securing your wrist.

"what?” you should’ve expected something like this to happen, ending up in handcuffs was entirely on you, you reached for your gun as the Baron ran out of the room “fuck you!" by the time you fired the first bullet he was already out of sight.

It took you all but thirty seconds to get rid of the handcuffs and run after him, the place was a maze, corridors leading into closed rooms or circling back to the start, you had to stop and take a deep breath to pay attention to any sounds that might alert you as to where everybody was, You sprinted towards the gunshots as soon as you heard them, gun in hand ready for the action.

It took you way too long to find the room where they were coming from, which was now quiet as Walker stood over a mess of broken vials and Zemo seemingly unconscious lying on the floor.

He gave you a death stare as you approached, relieved – much to your own concern- to see the Baron’s chest going steadily up and down.

“I thought i ordered you to look after Zemo” either the man was provoking you on purpose, or he didn’t think you would actually do something no matter how many times he poked the bear with the stick.

“I'm not a babysitter and I don't take orders from you”

Sam and Bucky entered the room before Walker could respond or you could make the threat that had been lingering on your mind, they looked at Zemo, at the mess on the floor and Walker’s barely contained anger. You were relieved to see them well, things hadn’t gone according to plan, but it could’ve been a lot worst.

You regrouped at Zemo’s apartment, the Baron laid on the sofa putting ice on his cheek after having taken a pill for the headache, but even then, and he couldn’t keep himself from speaking. He asked Sam the same question he had asked you earlier, he didn’t hesitate in his answer, but you already knew he had that conviction with him, you admired him for it.

You listened in silence as the two of them discussed Karli and the serum. She was on the run again, but at least there was no more serum for her, or anyone else, to misuse, Zemo had completed his mission.

“Something’s not right about walker” Bucky entered the room announcing what everybody else already knew, and proceeded to blast Sam about giving up the shield again, you leaned against the kitchen counter, observing their exchange with a tired expression.

The repetitive discussion was interrupted by Walker barging inside the space like it was his own, demanding for Sam to turn Zemo in to him, the Baron stood up from the sofa as the brand new Captain America threatened Sam, you almost wished for a fight to break out so you could have a valid excuse to punch him the face.

Sadly for you, the Dora stepped in before anything could happen, entering the room with the spears looking regal, you were jealous of them when the fight broke out and they started kicking John’s ass.

“We should step in” Sam said, but you and Bucky were enjoying the show quite a lot. Not to mention you weren’t about to fight a Dora for John Walker.

Bucky gave in eventually, stepping in to help stop the fight, Sam jumped into action as well and you sighed as you observed the bodies flying around knowing you would have to step in sooner or later, except something caught you eye.

He thought nobody would notice him sneaking away in the middle of the chaos, but you did, or perhaps he expected you to notice, perhaps he wanted you to. You followed him inside the bathroom, gun drawn out, unsure of what to do, you had never expected this mission to bring you to the place you currently were in.

Zemo was waiting for you when you opened the door, he didn't look surprised at the gun you pointed in his direction and stood calmly as you took in the scene inside, the bathtub was pushed to the side revealing a tunnel in the ground, your mouth opened and then closed, knuckles turning white around the gun as you pondered what to do, a single word from you and Zemo's scape would be over...and yet.

“Step away from the tunnel Baron, or I will be forced to shoot you” your voice was firm despite the insecurity in your stand, something he picked up on, as well as the fact that you let the door close behind you.

“Ah, but those are not your only choices y/n, are they?”

Choice.

The world had changed so much it felt like a lifetime ago when you had decided it was worth leaving the life you knew behind to follow Steve Rogers, that world no longer existed, the person you were then no longer existed either. You couldn’t just go back and try whatever life Sam thought he could help you live, not in the store accepting insults with a smile, or working as tool for his government doing all the dirty work and being called a hero for it.

You hated being reminded of your own insignificance in the grand scheme of the world, but that was exactly the way you were feeling then, like your destiny was not your own, it was a feeling you didn’t want to get used to, a feeling you would have to live with if you stayed.

A choice.

Your life had been full of bad choices, forced choices you had to make to survive, and then the one you had made because it felt right, the one that had brought you here, Sam had said doing the right thing was a choice you had to keep on making, except the right choice wasn’t always so clear.

“With my resources and your contacts we can disappear, you know they will never let you free”

Sam may have good intentions, but your destiny wasn’t his decision, your stay in the US depended on the government’s hyper vigilance of your every move, after all you were just a foreign mercenary.

You lowered your gun took your phone out of your pocket and the intercom from your ear and placed it on the bathroom counter, was this the right choice? Was this just an easy way out for you? You bite your lip, listening to the commotion outside, you were going to miss Sam and Bucky, but leaving them behind didn’t have to mean a step back for you, this could be your next step forward.

You didn’t know into what, but you had to try.

The Baron extended a hand towards you and you took it, standing on the edge of the tunnel looking down into the darkness, you felt something hard pressing against your lower back, Zemo’s eyes were dark when you met them.

“I don’t take betrayal very well” he gestured towards all the things you had left behind, everything they could use to track you “is that everything?”

You grabbed the barrel of the gun and forced it away from your body without breaking from his eyes “I have made my choice”

He smiled then, a polite charming smile like he hadn’t just threatened you a few seconds ago.

“After you, dorogoya”

You jumped in, falling into the dark uncertainty with one of the most dangerous men you had ever met, not knowing where or how your partnership was going to end, if ever. Perhaps it would be an amicable goodbye, or perhaps a big fucking mess, but you had made your choice, and now had to live with the consequences.

[firelxdykatara]

I’m just really confused as to where this idea that Zuko is gaycoded came from. Like people are allowed to have that headcanon but I don’t understand where people are coming from when they try and claim that he was undisputedly gaycoded and trying to deny it is homophobic when he’s only ever shown romantic interest in women.

I made a pretty long post on the topic a while back, but the ultimate gist of it is this: there are a lot of elements of Zuko's status as an abuse victim and trauma survivor that resonate with queer folks. This is understandable and completely fine! However, there are some parts of the fandom who have taken that to the other extreme and will now insist that those elements are uniquely queer, and that they can only be read as some sort of veiled gay/coming out narrative, even though that doesn't make much sense since there is no part of Zuko's narrative which is unique to any sort of queer experience.

I think the problem really does stem from two things being conflated--Zuko's history of abuse and trauma, and trauma&abuse being something a lot of queer people have experienced. I suspect it goes something like 'I see a lot of myself in Zuko, and I was abused for being gay, therefore Zuko must be gay too in order to have had similar experiences.' This can then lead to feeling dismissed or invalidated when other people point out that those experiences are not unique to being queer--but on the flip side, abuse victims and trauma survivors whose abuse&trauma do not stem from queerness (even if they are queer themselves) can feel invalidated and dismissed by the implication that their trauma must be connected to their queerness or it isn't valid.

This is also where the 'people don't actually know what gay coded means' part comes in, and I realize now that I didn't actually get into what gay coding (and queer coding in general) actually means, since I was so hung up on pointing out how Zuko doesn't really fit the mold. (And the few elements that exist which could be said to count are because of the 'villains historically get queer coded bc Hays Code era' thing and mostly occur in Book 1, not because of how he acts as an abuse&trauma survivor.)

Under a cut because I kind of go on a tangent about gay/queer coding, but I swear I get back to the point eventually.

Queer coding (and it is notable that, with respect to Zuko, it is almost always framed as 'he couldn't possibly be attracted to girls', rather than 'he could be attracted to boys as well as girls' in these discussions, for... no real discernible reason, but I'll get into that in a bit) is the practice of giving characters 'stereotypically queer' traits and characteristics to 'slide them under the radar' in an era where having explicitly queer characters on screen was not allowed, unless they were evil or otherwise narratively punished for their queerness. (See: the extant history of villains being queer-coded, because if they were Evil then it was ok to make them 'look gay', since the story wasn't going to be rewarding their queerness and making audiences think it was in any way OK.) This is thanks to the Motion Picture Production Code (colloquially and more popularly known as the Hays Code), which was a set of guidelines which movies coming out of any major studio had to adhere to in order to be slated for public release and lasted from the early 1930s until it was finally abandoned in the late 60s.

The Hays Code essentially existed to ensure that the content of major motion pictures would not 'lower the moral standards' of the viewing public. It didn't just have to do with queerness--cursing was heavily monitored, sex outside of marriage was not allowed to be seen as desirable or tittilating, miscegenation was not allowed (most specifically interracial relationships between black and white people), criminals had to be punished lest the audience think that it was ok to be gay and do crime, etc. Since same-sex relations fell under 'sexual perversion', they could not be shown unless the 'perversion' were punished in some way. (This is also the origin of the Bury Your Gays trope, another term that is widely misunderstood and misapplied today.) To get around this, queer coding became the practice by which movies and television could depict queer people but not really, and it also became customary to give villains this coding even more overtly, since they would get punished by the end of the film or series anyway and there was nothing to lose by making them flamboyant and racy/overly sexual/promiscuous.

Over time, this practice of making villains flamboyant, sexually aggressive, &etc became somewhat separated from its origins in queer coding, by which I mean that these traits and tropes became the go-to for villains even when the creator had no real intention of making them seem queer. This is how you generally get unintentional queer-coding--because these traits that have been given to villains for decades have roots in coding, but people tend to go right to them when it comes to creating their villains without considering where they came from.

Even after the Hays Code was abandoned, the sentiments and practices remained. Having queer characters who weren't punished by the narrative for being queer was exceptionally rare, and it really isn't until the last fifteen or so years that we've seen any pushback against that. Buffy the Vampire Slayer is famous for being one of the first shows on primetime television to feature an explicitly gay relationship on-screen, and that relationship ended in one of the most painful instances of Bury Your Gays that I have ever personally witnessed. (Something that, fourteen years later, The 100 would visually and textually reference with Lexa's death. Getting hit by a bullet intended for someone else after a night of finally getting to be happy and have sex with her s/o? It wasn't remotely subtle. I don't even like Clexa, but that was incredibly rough to witness.)

However, bringing this back to Zuko, he really doesn't fit the criteria for queer coding for a number of reasons. First of all, no one behind the scenes (mostly a bunch of cishet men) was at all intending to include queer rep in the show. This wasn't a case where they were like 'well, we really wanted to make Zuko gay, but we couldn't get that past the censors, so here are a few winks and a nudge', because it just wasn't on their radar at all. Which makes sense--it wasn't on most radars in that era of children's programming. This isn't really an indictment, it's just a fact of the time--in the mid/late 00s, no one was really thinking about putting queer characters in children's cartoons. People were barely beginning to include them in more teen- and adult-oriented television and movies. It just wasn't something that a couple of straight men, who were creating a fantasy series aimed at young kids, were going to think about.

What few instances you can point to from the series where Zuko might be considered to exhibit coding largely happen in Book 1, when he was a villain, because the writers were drawing from typically villainous traits that had historically come from queer coding villains and had since passed into common usage as villainous traits. But they weren't done with any intention of making it seem like Zuko might be attracted to boys.

And, again, what people actually point to as 'evidence' of Zuko being queer-coded--his awkwardness on his date with Jin and his confrontation with Ozai being the big ones I can think of off the top of my head--are actually just... traits that come from his history of trauma and abuse.

As I said in that old post:

making [zuko’s confrontation of ozai] about zuko being gay and rejecting ozai’s homophobia, rather than zuko learning fundamental truths about the world and about his home and about how there was something deeply wrong with his nation that needed to be fixed in order for the world to heal (and, no, ‘homophobia’ is not the answer to ‘what is wrong with the fire nation’, i’m still fucking pissed at bryke about that), misses the entire point of his character arc. this is the culmination of zuko realizing that he should never have had to earn his father’s love, because that should have been unconditional from the start. this is zuko realizing that he was not at fault for his father’s abuse--that speaking out of turn in a war meeting in no way justified fighting a duel with a child.

is that first realization (that a parent’s love should be unconditional, and if it isn’t, then that is the parent’s fault and not the child’s) something that queer kids in homophobic households/families can relate to? of course it is. but it’s also something that every other abused kid, straight kids and even queer kids who were abused for other reasons before they even knew they were anything other than cishet, can relate to as well. in that respect, it is not a uniquely queer experience, nor is it a uniquely queer story, and zuko not being attracted to girls (which is what a lot of it seems to boil down to, at the end of the day--cutting down zuko’s potential ships so that only zukka and a few far more niche ships are left standing) is not necessary to his character arc. nor does it particularly make sense.

And, regarding his date with Jin:

(and before anyone brings up his date with jin--a) he enjoyed it when she kissed him, and b) he was a traumatized, abused child going out on a first date. of course he was fucking awkward. have you ever met a teenage boy????)

Zuko is socially awkward and maladjusted because he was abused by his father as a child and has trouble relating to people as a result. He was heavily traumatized and brutally physically injured as a teenager, and it took him years to begin to truly recover from the scars that left on his psyche (and it's highly likely, despite the strides he made in canon, that he has a long way to go, post series; it's such a pity that we never got any continuation comics >.>). He was not abused for being gay or queer--he was abused because his father believed he was weak, and part of Zuko's journey was realizing that his father's perception of strength was flawed at its core. That his entire nation had rotted from the inside out, and the regime needed to be changed in order for the world--including his people--to begin to heal.

That could be commingled with a coming out narrative, which is completely fine for headcanons (although I personally prefer not to, because, again, we have more than enough queer trauma already), but it simply doesn't exist in canon. Zuko was not abused or traumatized for being queer, and his confrontation with Ozai was not about him coming out or realizing any fundamental truth about himself--it was about realizing something fundamental about his father and his nation, and making the choice to leave them behind so that he could help the Avatar grow stronger and force things to change when he got back.

TL;DR: at the end of the day, none of the traits, scenes, or behavior Zuko exhibits which shippers tend to use to claim he was gay-coded are actually evidence of coding--they aren't uniquely queer experiences, as they stem from abuse that was not related in any way to his sexuality, and they are experiences that any kid who suffered similar abuse or trauma could recognize and resonate with. (Including straight kids, and queer kids who were abused for any reason other than their identity.) And, finally, Zuko can be queer without erasing or invalidating his canon attraction to girls, and it's endlessly frustrating that the 'Zuko is gay-coded' crowd refuses to acknowledge that.

[vanderlindemorgans]

Cross My Heart (Chapter 3)

Pairing: Agent Whiskey x Reader

Rating: Explicit/18+

Summary: A traitorous Agent Whiskey returns to the United States on the run. Being cast out by Statesman, he soon finds that you’re the only person he can turn to - the embittered former flame from years long passed

Word count: 3.4k

Warnings: Eventual smut, some references to alcoholism and drug use. Reader is in her late twenties but there is an age gap between her and Whiskey. Chapter specific warnings: none really but the reader is a tsundere, and there’s some vague awful knowledge on how horse ranches operate. 

Read on AO3 | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter | Masterlist

The next two weeks were about as awkward as one would expect them to be. Even without their already tense history with each other, it wouldn’t exactly be a situation that would be any easier to adjust to. For god's sake, he was hiding out in Texas and was wanted for treason against his former organisation. What about that was supposed to be easy for him?

The two of you had largely avoided each other during this time, sometimes even barely seeing each other during the day. For the first couple of days, Jack had spent most of his time upstairs at your insistence, in order to properly let his wounds heal. No matter how much he protested against you, you weren’t having a single second of his nonsense and told him rather firmly that it was for his own good to stay up there. Those were the days where he’d found himself utterly bored out of his brain - there were only so many books that were kept in that little guest bedroom, and even though the thought had crossed his mind a few times he’d already swore to you he wouldn’t go poking through the closets for anything.

When you’d finally deemed him in good enough shape to help around the ranch, then things had gotten better. Or at least, they’d gotten less boring. No matter what a part of his mind instinctually lingered on Statesman, whether that be on how so many years of loyalty to the organisation ended in a crashing blaze or how long he would have before they were able to track him down. He didn’t give himself much time on the run - a few months maximum if he was lucky before they inevitably caught onto him one way or another. Sometimes he wondered what the point of running even was if he believed so thoroughly that Statesman would catch up to him. The only answer he could ever give for himself to that was four simple words: I have to try. It may be a longshot, he may spend the rest of his life evading his former agency at every turn but goddamn he had to at least try to get away from it all. The things he’d done in Cambodia, the threat of death ever looming over him. He’d gotten lucky once escaping with his life, so who’s to say that couldn’t happen again? 

Stealing a brief glance over to where you were only metres away from him, cleaning out one of the older horses stalls, he couldn’t help but wonder about you. There was no doubt in his mind that you loathed him for what he did, and rightfully so he had to admit. The few words you had exchanged with each other during this time were terse and brief, and were mainly condensed to matters with looking after the animals or mundane things like asking where the keys were. Even from the start your demeanour hadn’t been remarkably bright, which in a way struck him as odd. You certainly weren’t the same girl he remembered dating years ago. Jack never expected you to be happy at his return into your life but there was something more too - even when you weren’t around him, when you were putting on a happy face for the different guests and customers something was missing still. When Jack had first met you, you were still only in college, and while on the surface you had that same snark that he found himself loving more and more about you with every time you’d spoken, there was also a sense of innocence there. He remembered how your moral code was always focused on doing the right thing, how you wanted to believe that deep down everyone had some good in them. It was something he’d admired about you - even back then he was jaded by the world, having witnessed so much wickedness firsthand both through his position at Statesman and from his own life before that. Some would call you naive for having that much faith in humanity, but he’d found it endlessly endearing. 

He wasn’t inclined to say that you no longer believed in doing what’s right - you had taken him in when there was nowhere else to turn. But that brightness in your eyes, the unwavering trust you’d always been willing to give. That was what was gone, extinguished like it was never even there to begin with. He had to wonder if he was largely responsible for this change, if the reason you’d become so passingly apathetic and distrustful was because of his actions. Most likely that was the case, and from what you’d said a couple of weeks back about your parents passing away it was no wonder you were no longer that spunky wide-eyed girl from Texas, that you had become so sullen and moody. A lot had clearly happened in those seven years of silence, and for that he felt truly remorseful for how he’d hurt you.

You hadn’t mentioned that night so far, so a part of Jack felt willing to leave things as is and only focus on being as little of a hassle to you as possible during this time. If you mention the breakup you run the risk of making things worse, he reasoned with himself. As much as he wanted to apologise, explain himself a little bit, he knew that you were never going to believe a word he said. You believed him to be nothing more than a lying son of a bitch who was only interested in the thrill of the chase and not ever after anything truly committed. He could still hear those cutting remarks slip from your lips as if it were only yesterday. “You know what you are? You’re a fucking liar, Jack Daniels. What happened to forever and always? Or did you forget that?”. 

“Hey, Jack, there should be a new delivery of fresh hay coming through for the horses in the next couple of minutes. Do me a favour and go greet them for me, will ya?” he heard your voice ring out, interrupting his train of thought and bringing him back to reality. “Sure thing, darlin’” he nodded, setting aside the bag of grain he’d been giving each of the horses and stepping aside over towards the stables entrances, only just missing the hasty look you shot him out the corner of his eye.

___

You didn’t know what had come over you. All morning you had been distracted by him, your eyes wandering over to where he was feeding the horses, running his hand across their manes and giving them a gentle pet. Jack had always been great with animals, something the both of you had in common. Rolling your eyes to yourself, you continued to direct your focus on raking out all manner of gunk and mess from the stalls, somewhat annoyed to even be reminiscing on such long forgotten things. Normally you were level headed and focused but ever since Jack had appeared back in your life out of the blue things had gotten a tad stranger for you. It didn’t surprise you in the least that his presence in your house ignited old memories, coaxing out both the bitter and bright from their place dormant at the back of your mind. The two of you had barely said a word to each other in those two weeks and yet here you were, being plagued by ghosts of the past. You wondered if Jack felt the same way, if he could also feel the awkward tension ripe between you. In your opinion, you’d have to be an idiot not to notice.

It didn’t make sense to you. You’d thought you’d long since moved on from the pain he’d caused you, focusing on maintaining a steady rhythm and pace in your own life and being far too busy with the ranch to even let your thoughts wander to your ex-boyfriend. With him around though, it was bringing everything back, almost as if none of it had ever left in the first place. Safe to say, all of it made you more than a bit agitated

But you couldn’t have just left him out there to fend for himself. No, you weren’t heartless, and taking him in was the right thing to do. You could handle the irritating flashbacks and echoes as long as it meant he was safe and alive. And besides, this was only temporary. He’d no doubt find somewhere else to jet off to in a matter of weeks and leave you to return back to your normal routine. It was odd having someone else in the house anyway, after spending so many years alone. Suddenly you had to be considerate for someone else, integrating them into your own routine, your way of life.

And, truth be told, a small part of you didn’t mind the company one bit. Not that you’d ever say that outloud of course. No, you’d rather kill yourself before admitting to anyone, lest Jack himself, that you actually liked having someone else around. Even if words exchanged were few and far between, there was an element of comfort to having someone stay with you. Though you largely chalked this small feeling up to spending too long in solitude. 

Another thing that had taken you by surprise was Jack’s behaviour. You’d fully expected to have to once again deal with his antics, the annoying and frustratingly devilish charm he exuded in every quick witted remark, that smirk of his you’d come to know so well that once upon a time was enough to make you bend to him, and you’d prepared yourself the best you could to combat him back. You were determined to not let him get under your skin and not be taken in by his charm: you knew better now. Strange as it was though, none of that ever ended up coming to pass. In the few interactions you did have with each other a day, Jack was being mostly polite and keeping to himself. Sure, there were a few banter-like comments sprinkled here and there, this was Jack Daniels after all, but they were few and far between. He still hadn’t told you the finer details of what had happened between him and those other agents but it must have been enough to knock him down a few pegs in the ego department judging by his demeanour. That, or he felt the stifling awkwardness between you two and felt it best to dial himself back a bit. Maybe it was a mix of both. You really couldn’t say for sure though. 

Shaking your head, you shifted focus back on to the list of tasks you needed to get through that day before the ranch opened for business. It was around seven in the morning, and opening hours were from eight-thirty to six, and it was a Wednesday so business was moderate. You had a couple of kids booked for riding lessons later on as well as some people coming to rent out specific horses for rides, plus a doctor coming to look at one of the pregnant mares for a checkup. Not exactly what you would call a hectic day but still not a walk in the park either. You also had a couple of deliveries coming in that day, speaking of which, you remembered, one was scheduled to arrive in only a few moments.

You shouted out for Jack to go meet with the delivery guy, and you watched him as he sauntered out of the stables in search of the van, your eyes catching a glimpse of that ridiculous oversized belt buckle of his as it glinted in the early morning light. There were some things about that man you just never understood, his affinity for that tacky buckle being one of them. 

You turned your attention back to your current task of cleaning out the horses stalls. Years ago when you were a young kid you’d turned up your nose at the idea of having to shove around manure and urine soaked hay twice a day, though years passed and you barely even noticed or cared about the grossness of the stench. Shoving the last bits of hay into a large plastic garbage bag, you turned back over to where the old mare was standing in the corner, looking disinterested as usual and blew on a stray strand of hair that had fallen into your eyes. “Looks like I’m all done here, Jack should be back with the hay for you in a moment” you mused, to which the animal in question lightly grunted back at you, as if it could understand exactly what you’d just said.

“Yeah, yeah, I know old girl. Just sit tight, ok?” you replied, stepping out of the stall and dragging the gate behind you, clearing the latch click just as Jack walked back in with an armful of hay bales. “I got the guy unloading the rest from his van, this should last ya a little over two weeks” he informed you, eliciting a general nod in his direction as a reply. “Good, that’s what I was hoping for. Just put it over by the door and I’ll sort it out in a bit” you instructed, looking down at your wristwatch for the time. 7:40 am - perfectly on schedule. The rest of your employees would be arriving soon, so tasks would be able to be knocked out faster too. 

The low sound of a yawn pulled you from your thoughts as you looked up over to where Jack was stacking the bales of hay, lightly rubbing a hand over his face. “Tired are we, Jack?” you commented, raising your brow slightly at him. 

“A little” he admitted. “Forgot to make myself a coffee this mornin’, and truth be told I didn’t get the best sleep last night”. 

“Is everything alright up there? I’d hate for you to be uncomfortable” you said, a little bit of sarcasm working its way into your tone. You just couldn’t help it, and in your mind, he well deserved every little lick of ire you could throw his way. 

“Everythings perfect, darlin’, I’m just...my mind tends to wander late at night. Things to do with Statesman and such, nothin’ for you to really be concerned about” he dismissed, shifting on his heel towards where the delivery man was bringing in the last of the stock he’d brought over. You didn’t move a single step, instead watching him thank the man and take the supplies off him, a small feeling of sympathy sparking that you quickly shrugged off like it was nothing. People dealt with insomnia all the time, you reasoned. And he said himself that it was nothing to worry about so that was that.

Neither of you said a word for the next couple of minutes, yet some part of the conversation was still at the back of your mind. You didn’t understand why - it was a pretty mundane exchange of words overall however you couldn’t help but still feel you needed to say something more.

“Sometimes I find it hard to sleep too. Usually that’s when I get up and go get a book or something. Anything that works as a distraction to whatever's on my mind” you found yourself saying out of nowhere. You could feel Jack glance over at you but you didn’t meet his gaze, keeping your own eyes trained down on the floor that you were sweeping. “I’ll have to keep that in mind then” you heard him say in response, to which you acknowledged him with a small nod and a slight side glance. In an instant afterwards, you minorly chastised yourself for saying something so stupid and random to him. Great, now you’ve made it even more awkward. You should have just kept your mouth shut. Even still, it was hard to miss that sweet look in Jack’s eyes when he’d replied back, when your eyes had met briefly for that small moment.

___

The loud sound of incessant beeping awoke you from your deep slumber, the noise becoming more and more grating with each second that passed. Mumbling under your breath you reached your hand out from underneath the sheets to flick the alarm off, your eyes only just beginning to adjust to the room around you as the last remnants of your dream melted away into nothing, being replaced by the stark wooden panelling of the walls and the feeling of textured quilt on the edge of your feet. There was barely any light in the room as the sun hadn’t come up yet, and wouldn’t rise for another fifteen minutes or so, leaving your vision time to adjust to the world around you as you rose up in bed and sighed.

Every morning it seemed you told yourself that you needed a vacation, a couple of days off to get away from it all and kick back a little. Sometimes you’d indulge yourself in the thought - taking a plane off to somewhere and not coming back for a couple of weeks. You never actually did it though, not due to a lack of finances but moreso that you didn’t even know what you’d do with yourself with all that time. As much as ranch work dragged on some days, the methodical nature of it kept you grounded and focused. What the hell were you supposed to do without it?

Shuffling off to the edge of the bed, you fumbled around for a pair of socks in your bedside drawer and slipped them onto your feet, your mind starting to wander off to that ever present list of tasks and chores you kept for yourself. The harder you thought on it, the more muddled your brain seemed to get. Leave the to-do list for after you’ve had coffee.

Your body was practically on autopilot as you moved out into the hallway and down the stairs, wanting to hurry to get that invigorating rush that caffeine gave you. The actual taste of the drink you were never totally partial to, truth be told: drinking it had more to do with the fact it woke you up and made you feel less like wanting to die every early morning. No matter how many years passed or long you kept doing this for, you just never became a morning person.

You didn’t notice it at first when you’d reached for two mugs instead of one out of the cupboard, only really caring about attempting to make yourself a coffee as fast as possible that hopefully wasn’t totally shitty in quality. You didn’t notice when you loaded up the espresso machine that you put enough coffee in for two instead of one, or when you put in extra milk in the frother. Really, it only had come to your attention that you’d done any of those things when you suddenly stared back at the kitchen counter and noticed two full mugs of coffee instead of one.

Staring back and forth between the two, you felt your brow crease while you moved your hand up to your neck, lightly rubbing on the back. Huh. Guess I must be really spaced this morning if I made two. As if on cue, you started to hear the sounds of Jack stirring upstairs, and without a second thought you grabbed both mugs in your hand and glided over towards the kitchen table, setting them both down and taking a seat in one of the well worn chairs.

“Hey. I made two by accident. You can have the other one I guess” you announced while watching him transcend down the stairs, gesturing vaguely over towards the other mug. You saw Jack glance up at you, his mussed hair and semi-dazed expression showing that he was probably half asleep still. He hadn’t bothered to dress himself yet, wearing the tight fitting white t-shirt you’d managed to fish out from a back cupboard somewhere and a pair of equally plain pajama pants. He looked...good, somehow, though you weren’t about to say that outloud. You could only imagine the smug self-satisfied smirk that type of remark would garner. 

He slowly walked up towards the table and gently scooped up the mug in his hand, running his thumb over the edge lightly. “Accident, huh? If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were starting to warm up to me a little” he teased. You rolled your eyes back at him and took another sip of coffee. “Oh, shut up”.

[slutsofren]

Danger Days Chapter 2: Kill All Your Friends

missed chapter 1? read here!

summary: things get thrown for a bit a loop at the dam when two strangers appear, revealing to be Joel, Tommy's younger brother and a young girl. their presence makes things a little tense but soon gets heated as danger follows them to thr power plant.

word count: 3,352

read on ao3 here

warnings: slight cursing, guns and well, canon-typical murder, hunter attack

notes: does anybody else look at joel and just wanna,,,, punch him in the face with kisses? just because he deserves it? no? only me? 

Humid. It was always fucking humid. The lot of you have been out at the dam for nearly a week with little to be shown as progress. Things in Jackson were doing fine, wonderful even, and then the power went out. Turns out one of the turbines busted, it’s taken you and the whole group working day and night to repair it.

You leaned against the wall, taking in the greenery that was slowly encompassing the whole hydroelectric dam. It was rather beautiful. You glanced over to David, one of the few engineers from the old world, was hunched over the table mumbling softly to himself looking over a rather poorly drawn map of the turbines, trying to figure out what was going wrong. Then glanced to the far side of the courtyard where Tommy and Maria were, both engrossed in some tense conversation. 

Whatever they were whisper-arguing about wasn’t going to be any of your business… until Maria finds you later on to vent at least. A little push off the wall and you grabbed your rifle before swinging it onto your back, groaning that your little break was probably over by now. Today you had guard duty. How fun.

You approached the duo, hoping to simmer down whatever was going on between them, likely both were stressed beyond hell for the turbine to come back on. Maria saw you first and put her hand on her face, rubbing away some tension. She said your name and pulled you into a half hug and you didn’t miss the small thanks she whispered in your ear for interrupting.

“Goin’ back on duty, want me to keep near the front gate?”

Maria nodded, “Sounds good. I’ll follow you in a minute.”

Tommy looked at you and gave you a friendly smile. Although you were casual friends with the man long before you met Maria, he knows where your loyalties lie but also knows you have his back on the field. When you first arrived at Jackson, bloodied and bruised, Maria didn’t trust you as far as she could have tossed you, but as things go, you both wormed into the others hearts through sheer sarcasm and your ‘take no shit’ attitude.

That’s when Tommy knew he was fucked being the only person between the two of you.  

You left and went to go to your post, fanning out the jean jacket you were wearing to help relieve the humidity on your skin. The entrance to the hydroelectric dam was hellbent on attracting unwanted attention. For the near week you’ve been out here you had two bandit attacks, not to mention the ones back at Jackson, causing you to feel even stickier.

You found a spot up top the entrance to keep an eye out through the scope of your rifle, not noticing anything for another couple of hours, Maria not even coming by to her post. Just as you were going to call your shift, you noticed some slight movement across the concrete jungle of the remains of the power plant.

And some more movement.

Then more.

You grabbed your radio and phoned in, “Activity to the east. Two spotted.” The radio clicked and produced static until another click sounded.

Maria called back, “Eyes.”

“Noted. Out.”

With that, you knew exactly what to do. Everybody did. When it came down to it, nobody really did want a gunfight. When the code ‘eyes’ is spoken, it means shut up and watch. If the people pass, they go on their merry way. If they don’t, well, they typically don’t leave alive if they so much as hint at being a threat.

It’s unfortunate this is the way life is now but who are you to fight the changing tides.

You peek through your scope again, watching a dark haired man and a smaller woman work their way through the maze, figuring out how to cross the water. You took your eyes off the scope and began to watch them without the tool until they both began pushing at the gate. You grumble, “Contact made.”

Maria pops in behind you on your left and together you two and two more of the on duty guards on the other end of the gate point your rifles at the duo, revealing yourselves. The man doesn’t take notice until the girl points a gun at your companions then you and he backs off the entrance.

“Don’t even think about drawing your weapon! Tell the girl to drop hers. Now,” Maria shouts besides you.

The man backs up a couple steps, sticking his hand out to the girl, “Ellie, so as the lady says.”

She looks at him and puts her arms up in surrender, “Okay.”

Maria, still holding her rifle at the two strangers, says to the man, “Please tell me you're lost.”

“We didn’t know the place was occupied, we’re just trying to make our way through,” he points through the gate.

“Through to where?”

Then a deep voice picks up, “They're alright.”

You and Maria look away from the two down to the voice, seeing Tommy approaching the gate. “What, you know these people,” Maria asks him.

“I know him,” Tommy grumbles as he opens the gate, “He’s my goddamn brother.”

Oh.

You’d heard stories of the man before, of Joel Miller. From what Tommy has said before you recalled that the man was a bit of a brute, shut off from everybody after losing his daughter. He was a hunter and did some goddamned awful things in this world but quite frankly, who hasn’t? You know you have in the past to ensure your survival. It was something Tommy hated that his brother participated in but you couldn’t blame him, not after the shit you’ve seen and done.

Joel looked at his brother and his shoulders slumped, “Tommy.”

“Holy shit,” he said and moved past the safety of the gates and went straight to Joel, wrapping his arms around him.

“How you doin’, baby brother?”

Maria shot you a look that clearly stated she didn’t trust the man, despite being her brother-in-law, she heard the same stories you did. The man was a hunter, a murderer, even a smuggler. The very kind of people that don’t bode well with Jackson. With a sigh, you both put down your rifles and headed down to the gate to meet Joel and the girl, Ellie. She walked right up to the two men and you could faintly hear Tommy say, “You got fuckin’ old.”

“Easy - it’s gonna happen to you too,” Joel quipped.

Tommy took a step back, you watched how he shuffled on his feet and introduced Maria. “Be nice to her, she sorta runs things around here.”

“Ma’am.” Joel nods his head towards her. “Thanks for not blowing my head off.”

You roll your eyes at this from where you’re watching this all unfold, internally gagging at Joel’s whole ‘southern charm’ bit. Although he should be more grateful to you for not shooting him. Maria looks at Tommy beside her, “Would’ve been embarrassing, considering you’re my brother-in-law.”

An amused smile immediately hits your lips as you watch Joel try to absorb that information. He looks between the couple a few times before Tommy says, “We all gotta get wrangled up at some point.”

Maria turns to you and you lose the smile as she extends a hand for you to approach. “And this here is my second in command,” introducing you to Joel by giving him your first name and he nods his head, both of you deciding to not say a word to each other, silently sizing the other up. His eyes don’t leave yours but for a brief moment you swear his eyes flash down your body and back up as he lets out a low huff.

Oh, it’s on old man, you think.

Maria chuckles, noticing whatever the hell is happening between you two, and she turns towards the girl. “Ellie, right? What brings you through here?”

Ellie looks towards Joel for guidance, “Uh… it’s kind of a long story.”

Tommy immediately notices all the other eyes and ears watching this interaction unfold and puts his hand on Maria’s back, picking up the clear signal for some privacy. “Why don’t we bring ‘em inside?”

“Yeah, you hungry,” she asks Ellie.

“Starving,” the girl groans. You smile a bit, feeling pretty amused at this whole thing. From the stories you’ve been told about Joel it seemed very unlikely he’d be traveling with a companion, much less a child.

Tommy steps aside as you walk back through the gate first, Maria and Ellie behind you. “False alarm. They're friendlies,” you shout, walking further in the power plant leading the group. You take a quick glance around at the other scouts on shift, watching them watch the newcomers. Everybody was on edge, everybody was wary. The fact Tommy and Maria were letting some strangers in, in the midst of repairing an essential component to Jackson functioning properly, was not going past anybody.

You can hear Maria as she explains the stares and the heavily armed posts to Joel somewhere behind you, “We’ve been dealing with raids. Lots of bandits in this area.”

“It’s been quiet for a few days,” Tommy adds on, explaining why they answered at the gate so aggressively, as if it was any consolation of almost killing his brother and the girl.

“What the hell are you doing here? I thought I’d find you in Jackson.”

“Been trying to bring the plant back to life,” Tommy explains.

This time you chime in, “We had it working before, but one of the turbines went south about a week ago. Been tryin’ to fix it up.”

Tommy adjusts his rifle on his shoulder. “We have electricity Joel… had. We’ll get it running again.”

Ellie runs past you, approaching a few of the horses. “No way! You guys have horses.”

“We got a whole lot of ‘em,” Tommy tells her. You watch as she puts her hand on the brown and white one, petting it softly.

Beside the horse is Cherry, one of the few horse wranglers in Jackson, she was kind and sweet, pretty young too all things considered. She was tall and bulky from years of shoving heavy loads of hay, sometimes you’d wonder what it’d be like to get tossed around by her. She’s kind of notorious for winning hand-to-hand combat scenarios in the training hall. Not that you ever went.

Cherry tells Ellie about the horse and they get to talking about the animal. You also hear Charlie over your shoulder asking Tommy for help with one of the iron shoes on another horse. You take a few steps back then marching towards the warehouse, settling against the wall next to Earl and he gives you a brief nod acknowledging you. He’s sweet, you think, you’ve never spoken to him much but you recall he’s one of the maintenance men around Jackson. Thankfully he’s the silent type and you don’t have to try and make polite small talk with him.

As you both lean against the wall quietly, you begin watching both Ellie and Joel and how they’re assessing the environment. Ellie seems very excited petting the horse and talking to Cherry but Joel looks on edge, mirroring everyone else. He catches you staring and looks away slowly, now watching Ellie talk to Cherry about going riding later on.

Maria and Tommy make their way towards you and you push off, walking up the stairs and opening the door, you faintly hear Maria talk to Earl about heading back to Jackson. The door creaks open and you let Tommy, Joel, Ellie, then Maria into the warehouse until both your and Maria’s radios crackle. “Maria, we’re in the control room. Steve’s about to start it back up. Do you wanna come check it out?”

Maria sighs and mumbles back to you, “I’d rather eat with Ellie.”

You stifle a bit of a laugh at her candor in front of the others and Tommy interjects, “It’s my turn anyway. I’ll go.”

Joel then volunteers to go with his brother, telling Ellie to go with you and Maria but not before flashing you a look that says something akin to ‘try something and I’ll hunt you’.

Before Ellie could protest, Maria pulls her along. “C’mon, Ellie. Let’s give the boys some space.”

The three of you are relatively quiet leading back to the office room where the food was. Ellie kept looking over her shoulder, likely for Joel. You started wondering how he came across her, doubting any possibility she was his daughter. Tommy would have known if that were the case.

You gave a look over at Ellie, now seeing her a little closer. She looks slightly gaunt, likely hasn’t eaten in a few days you suspect which worries you a bit. No kid should have to go without.

“When was the last time you ate,” you ask her.

She ponders for a moment, “Before we got here I was pretty sure that the next squirrel I saw I was gonna eat.”

You and Maria raised your eyebrows at her admission before gently laughing as you reached the room. Maria pulls out some jars of fruit and a container of jerky from underneath and hands it to her, “Here, eat some of this. We have better options back in Jackson but while we don’t have a full service kitchen out here, this is the best we got.”

“That’s okay! I’ll eat almost anything at this point,” she openly admits. You take notice in how expressive she is, likely warming up to you and Maria now.

The three of you get to talking, making idle chatter over a few opened mason jars and a hefty supply of jerky. The more you talk with Ellie, the more you grow to like her. She’s got a mouth of a sailor and sarcasm that’d turn any old man running. 

Wonder if she’s annoyed the hell out of Joel, you muse. Now you sit, chewing on fruit and imagining how easy it’d be to get under his skin. You’re torn out of your thoughts when the lights suddenly turn on, “Thank the damned stars! I’m ready to get out of here. Everybody is driving me up the wall.”

Maria throws a loose grape at you, “Thanks a lot, asshole.”

“Anytime,” you wink.

“How long have you two known each other,” Ellie asks you both. 

You pop a piece of fruit in your mouth, “Just two years. She was already married to Tommy when I arrived.”

“Can’t believe you’re married to his brother,” Ellie groans. “Joel is such a grump, can’t imagine how the other one is.”

Maria nods and smiles, still eating some of the peaches. “Oh, trust me. Some days I want to strangle him. Didn’t expect to ever meet Joel, if I’m bein’ honest.”

“I couldn’t recognize him, not even by that photo,” you say mindlessly, reaching for your canteen and drinking water.

Ellie picks her head up a little more, “Photo? What photo?”

Maria gets up from her seat and walks to one of the duffle bags in the other room, she searches around before she pulls out a photo and when she returns, hands it to Ellie. She gestures to you, “Her and Tommy went down to Texas about a year ago, he wanted to see what was left of his and Joel’s old life and scavenge what they could.”

“We didn’t find much,” you continue, “Tommy didn’t think he’d ever see his brother again, it was like his way of saying goodbye so he took this photo of him and a couple others.”

“Who’s the girl,” Ellie asks looking at the picture.

“Sarah.” You shift in your seat, not feeling entirely comfortable with this conversation anymore. 

Maria finishes your sentence, “She was his daughter. She didn’t survive very long after the outbreak.”

Before you could try to steer the conversation in another direction, a loud siren echoed through the hall as shouts filled the warehouse.

“Bandits,” someone shouted as gunshots rang out.

You stand up and push Ellie behind you, looking for your rifle. It was too far away, tucked under one of the abandoned desks. “Fuck,” you shout as you see a handful of hunters enter the room.

Drawing the two handguns strapped to your thighs, you begin to take shots at them, not exactly hitting them where it was vital but enough to make them stumble and drop. Maria grabs you by the shoulder, “Let’s go!”

You retreat backwards into the closed off manager-type office and from the corner of your eye you see a man rise from the other side of a broken window and take aim at Ellie behind you. You whipped around and shoved against her with an ‘oof’ just as you hear something whizz past you and hit the wall above the two of you.

Hovering above Ellie, you keep her head down with your right hand, abandoning the gun beside her as you and Maria take alternating shots at the invaders. “Move, Ellie,” you tell her, lifting yourself up to give her room to maneuver into the office while shielding her.

Maria shuffles into the room after you and the girl, “There’s more coming in. We can’t take all of them.”

“Shit, okay,” you look around frantically. You were running low on bullets now, the rest of your spare ammunition was left in your backpack. In an entirely different area. Your eyes searched around the small room and you got Maria’s attention, together you pulled a nearby table into the office, barricading yourselves. 

“Under the table, now,” she yells at Ellie then looks at you.“Guess we’ll have to wait for the men to save us,” she says a little bitterly.

Together, the three of you hid. Waiting for the echo of bullets to cease after what feels like a lifetime.

Faintly, you could hear the familiar voice of Tommy yelling and a gruff one responding, likely his brother. You released the breath you had been holding onto as the last gunshot rang out. Between you and Maria, Ellie had her hands over her ears and she slowly lowered them until jumping up and shouting “They’re all dead!”

Maria rose to her feet as Tommy and her called out for each other, “The kid’s with us!” She jumps out the shattered window and runs to her husband as they check over each other.

You help Ellie out the office room the same way and Joel looks over her the same way as she recalls the attack.  “Joel, oh, man…,” Ellie begins talking so fast that she’s out of breath. “They were coming in from every direction and they were both like ‘we gotta run’ and so we dove over these tables and this huge guy blasts in with a shotgun-”

“Slow down, slow down. Listen-,” Joel cuts her off. He puts his hands on her shoulders and looks her in the eye, “Hey, hey, are you hurt?”

“No!” She looks at you, “She protected me!”

Joel follows her gaze and you look him in the eye, cocking an eyebrow at him. 

You’re not really competitive, you don’t really like attention either, but there was something about Joel fuckin’ Miller that really got to you. Maybe it was the way he seemed to be mindful of everything, maybe it was the way his eyes roamed over your body, maybe it was the fact he was unfortunately making you squirm where you stood as his hardened glare seemed to see right through you, asking you to try him.

Whatever it was, his hardened stare made you quiver ever so slightly. You took a few very mindful steps away from the man, walking towards Maria and Tommy when you caught the tail end of whatever he was saying to your best friend, “- to talk.”

It seemed like that was not what Maria wanted to hear as her already pale face grew paler and her signature scowl etched back across her face.

[reynie-muldoons]

'Depends on the Wagon' liveblog!

I saw someone do timestamps in their liveblog and it was absolutely lovely, so I think I'll try that too

1:55 why does Curtain sound like an mlm ceo LMAO

2:07 WOW ASSHOLE 😂😂 waving off your own teacher when he was complimenting you is not the vibe

2:17 so Dr. Curtian is only available through chain emails. Got it.

2:27 he seems like the kind of asshole to say that people on welfare are lazy and exploitave but then like, not pay his taxes

2:42 I DON'T LIKE HOW HE SAID THAT, THAT WAS CREEPY

2:47 oooooh Constance, always asking the right questions

3:05 Kate, why are you yelling, it's literally past curfew 😂

3:35 oh hai Jackson.. gtfo

4:22 oh yeah, the best way out is through the hallway that Jackson just entered. Good plane, babe.

4:25 soooo Kate Depending On Friends arc :)

4:59 AYYY HI RHONDA!!

5:13 why do I kinda fucking love then all deciphering the Morse code together

5:20 so the kids use the gemini riddle? Not the adults???

5:36 his face when he figures it out 😭😭😭

5:46 Nathaniel? Guess that's Dr. Curtain's name now. Less ridiculous than Ledroptha, but you dont get the badass Let Drop the Curtain reference

6:53 okay so no one knew he had a brother? But he did???

7:21 his faaaace 🥺

7:29 AWWW HE COULDNT BRING HIMSELF TO SHARE 😭😭😭 okay I'm kinda on board with the change if they can make it work in the long-haul

7:42 hi Milligan, good timing 😂

7:56 "not the time.........I'll take a dozen" Number Two my LOVE

8:23 interesting. I dont think Mr. Benedict was adopted in the books? He certainly didn't let Violet's family, the Hopefields, because he knew their financial troubles would be even worse. So who?

8:54 ohhhh dear, stages of grief at work. Maybe don't do that

9:05 I talked about this in the MBS discord server, but I think the show is really nailing Mr. Benedict's feelings. He's always been an emotional person, but he has to be so careful. Bottling up your feelings only leads to bigger feelings later. It makes so much sense for Mr. Benedict to be a whirlpool of strong, repressed emotions.

9:11 MILLIGAN'S FACE JAHAHS

9:34 RHONDA'S FACE HAGSKDGDJ

9:40 Mr. Benedict, sweetheart 🥺❤

10:01 "brothers stick together" why does it sound like he's talking about Reynie here 😭😭😭😭

10:12 that is a good ass point, Mr. Benedict already lied to them once

10:21 it makes sense for Sticky to be the one questioning the most because of his anxiety, but damn

10:46 AWWWWWW

10:56 KATE MAKING A BED FORT KATE MAKING A BED FORT KATE MAKING A BED FORT

11:00 I dont like how aggressive Kate is but it makes sense considering she's been in the circus for years, taking care of herself for far longer than she hasn't. She's not good at depending on people, and she's not good with difficult people.

11:10 Yeahh, Constance gets it!

11:40 Yeahhh, Constance gets it

12:55 that teacher seemed pretty nice last episode, nice to see that they're not what they seem just the same as Dr. Curtain lol

13:28 CONSTANCE I LOVE YOU 😂😂

14:00 "check again" okay so Krista from the tests and Martina give off the same vibe.. perfect 😂

14:16 "yeah......hang in there :D"

15:05 all of the apologies to the general class.. he's such an anxious sweetheart. He's really reading as autistic to me.

My sister just called me 😑 it's like 8 am, I answered her like "did you ever consider that you might be waking me up?" She did not consider that 😂

15:22 Martina's face just growing more and more annoyed and disgruntled HAHA

15:29 that was CORRECT?? WHAAAA

15:51 throwback to when I compared Dr. Curtain to an mlm ceo.. definitely like a cult

16:44 ohhhh Martina

17:30 CONSTANCE HEARING VOICES HELLOOOOO

18:22 ayyyyyy helper man

18:40 he seems too cheery to be a helper .-. The helpers all being super sad made [redacted]'s story make a whole lot more sense

19:35 aaaand now we get to it. You know, it really does seem a lot more cultish on screen than in the book

19:53 WAIT CONSTANCE GOOD JOB PUTTING THE PIECES TOGETHER 😂😂😂😂

19:53 that cut to Milligan making that exact face was INCREDIBLE

20:05 was he tryna leave? Yeah, good fuckin luck bucko

20:10 "critical papers at home" my ass, they packed everything up

20:24 the stages of grief back at it. 🥺

20:38 their relationship >>>>

21:00 "located in the..?" *description of envelope* "located in the....?" *more description* "located in the????" 😂😂😂😂

21:34 ohhhhh Thursday must be the student ranking day

21:56 Martina seems like the kind to throw out "pick a god and pray" as a crit quote 😂

22:07 I don't see any of the Society'a names on the list. Maybe they havent been there long enough

22:17 OH SHIT JK THERE THEY ARE

22:25 ohh Kate and Constance

22:55 the combination of the ferry horn and the bell makes it weirdly grim

23:55 them bringing Kate up and reminding her that she's needed 😌✨

24:29 hi Milligan bb ilyyyy

24:35 real good lookout guys, y'all are so well hidden

24:52 AYY HE'S DOING IT KATE STYLE

26:31 "visionary" is a word for it

26:31 I really kinda love that Number Two and Rhonda are going to such depths to try and help Mr. Benedict figure this out for sure

26:56 Mr. Benedict fully walking away while they talk about his brothers accomplishments 😂 I'm laughing, but poor guy

27:08 his FACE 🥺

27:28 HERE'S THAT TANTRUM FROM THE TRAILER

27:28 take your guesses how many times will he fall asleep

27:50 "he just has to work through some things" you dont fuckin say

27:55 you mean to tell me he had a full blown meltdown and they didn't show him falling asleep once??

28:35 like father like daughter 😌✨

29:10 ayyyy secret desk compartment

29:19 honestly I'm surprised there were actually papers he needed and it wasnt an excuse to go confront Dr. Curtain

29:32 oh shit, how'd they manage to get that far inside? No one was there to guard it, but the maze itself is a security measure

29:42 KATE STYLE STRIKES AGAIN

29:47 ooooh I like Dr. Curtain's office

30:01 WAS THAT SQ AND DID HE JUST CALL DR. CURTAIN HIS DAD

30:41 birds have careers. Got it 😂

30:50 JOURNAAAL

31:02 the fox?? Reynard the fox???

31:27 ohhh here we go, Dr. Curtain sees himself in Reynie only to resent it later

31:37 Mr. Benedict called Reynie a leader once too.. the parallels have ✨begun✨

32:12 is this the "keep your enemies close" conversation??

32:15 I'm honestly surprised he called him Sticky and not George

32:42 IT IS SQ IT IS SQ IT IS SQ

32:59 sooo that starts by not letting his caution down with you

33:11 Dr. Curtain congratulating himself mid-conversation on saying something deep is so in character

33:20 "I was betrayed by someone very close to me" so that was Mr. Benedict. Who the fuck else would it be

33:23 WHAT DID I SAAAAY

33:31 oh noooo Reynie starts doubting Mr. Benedict here? Is that the move?

33:43 that transition was so pretty stoppp

33:53 again how hasn't he fallen asleep

34:55 ayyyy journal snooping

35:05 Constance, my love, you are cut throat

35:11 Milligan is in the DRYWALL? ohh buddy be careful

35:21 omfg are they talking about water polo 😂 I love that that's the sport of choice

35:51 ayyyy they put the Milligan dots together too. Shame the guy's not with them rn

36:36 so Mr. Benedict brings up cheating first? I really like how we get to see the adults riddling out what to send back, we didn't get that at all in the books

37:46 I LOVE THAT THEY KEPT "don't get caught"

38:51 Kate riddling out the island schematics engineer style is so like her

39:07 they're just walking out the door?? Huh???

39:29 babe... turn off your flashlight

39:33 AND THAT'S WHY

39:58 is that the precursor to chuckroot?

40:38 the papers were from his orphanage 🥺🥺🥺

41:14 why does that break my heart

41:19 Dr. Curtain and SQ doing shit together it just.. so heartwarming

42:00 HAHA

42:16 okay, so show!Curtain is a kissass 😂

42:35 wait wait wait so Dr. Curtain is actively trying to contain his brother? That would explain why the Recruiters were looking for him and weirdly not the kids

43:25 "power wants to be free" sounds more like a personal mantra than a conversation between engineers

43:41 YES A LETTER TO MISS PERUMAL

44:02 more voices. Poor Connie girl 🥺

44:36 he loves her so much 😭😭😭

44:45 SHE TRIED TO SEND HIM A CARE PACKAGE

45:13 WORRIED MOM TIMEEE

[tellywoodtrash]

immj2 08.04.21 lb

why the fuck is vansh glaring at riddhima for dadi's dumb accusations???? does he not remember that siya's whole makeover came as a reaction after riddhima's "death" which means, she wasn't in the fucking house when it happened????? i swear to god, every raisinghania has horseshit for brains.

angre's back with a new injury and ishani's reacting like anyone would if their husband came back from work bleeding every single day. she's spitting nothing but facts and is so fucking right to hate vansh.

yessssssssssss ishani is here to take vansh ki class, and i fucking love it. vansh isn't even smirking this time around, coz ishani is really fucking angry and will literally snap his neck like a toothpick if he tries.

phewwwwwwwwww, ishani really going off today and I AM HERE FOR IT.

ofc he's doing that bullshit macho thing of punching shit in his anger and putting the blame on riddhima for all of it. sis idk why you're still with this man. you've obviously grown a brain now, why don't you see him for the abusive loser that he is????/

lmaooooooooooooooooo he's like "WHY WON'T YOU JUST TELL ME?!?!?!? don't you trust me riddhima????" NO BRO. NO. THE SIMPLE STRAIGHT ANSWER IS FUCKING NO. YOU'RE THE LEAST TRUSTWORTHY PERSON IN THIS SHOW. I'D TRUST A RATTLESNAKE BEFORE I'D TRUST YOUR MANIPULATIVE PSYCHO ASS.

suchhhhhh bad dubbing in this scene for rrahul.

anyway riddhima's like "nahi bataana mujhe", lol. i love it.

he stormed off in anger and she's lamenting not being able to tell him the secret until the black box is handed over to vyom. ugh. so lame.

cut to next morning, he woke up and riddhima's nowhere to be seen.

he goes and bangs on ishani's door and he's like "ishani plsssss darwaza kholo.......... main vansh." LOL OK???? BECAUSE WHO ELSE WOULD WE MISTAKE YOU FOR???

angre ready to leap outta bed but lmaoooooooo the look ishani gave him scared him back into lying down. anyway the moment she turns around he jumps up anyway.

ishani's like can you pls leave my husband alone?!?!?!?!?!?! which is well within her rights, coz vansh bhai really be doing bhangra tapdance all over the boundaries one should have as an employer, let alone brother-in-law.

lol vansh's first comment to angre is "ishani is really angry at me for you. i like that she loves you a lot." i'm sure this means more to angre than ishani's confession of love even.

anyway, he got the deets of that random jhopda from angre and is gonna go chaapa maarofy there. angre's like i'll come with, and ishani tears vansh a new one about respecting angre as the damaad of the house. phewwwwwwwww, i love it so much.

idhar bechare not-rrahul se covid ke time mein bhi kaam karwaaya jaa raha hai. baksh do bechaare ko yaar. rrahul se toh nahi karwaaya tha jab usko hua tha, aur woh lead hai. isko 2 hafte ke liye chutti nahi de sakte? kapde bhi nahi pehnne dete.

anyway riddhima is pissed at vyom for acting overfamiliar with his "partner"/"baby doll" nonsense, and is like jaane kaunse manhoos ghadi mein iske saath deal kar liya maine............ anyway, she gotta do black box shit fastttttt.

anyway, he's given her some apt or safehouse or something.

lollipop ladki and her incredibly toned legs (god, i'd kill for them!!!) are following vansh around, saying i gotta talk to youuuu. vansh is like behen, mere se meri ek bandi nahi sambhal rahi, i don't have time or energy for any sidechicks, pls baksh de. jaake aryan ko tang kar tu.

she's bc poori baat toh sun le. goes to show him the tattoo, but he gets a call and leaves. you know what, she shouldn't tell him it's the code to opening that stupid box. let him come beg. and then she can extort 2500 crore outta him.

idhar chained-up kabir is trying to attack riddhima who's like

can't say i'm not masssssssively enjoying this. i love kabir, i do, but he deserves this for all the haraamipannaa that he did to her and ruined her fucking life.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh she shot at KABIR while in the red leather catsuit, not vansh. a pity. shoulda shot both when she had the fucking chance, and lived a free life.

ugh she's doing all this coz he tried to kill vansh? not just for her own shits and giggles? how fucking disappointing.

i love helly's unbothered acting tho. too good.

riddhima's promising to kill him badeeee itmenaaan se.

she's like v 1.0 of me was a basic bitch who just wanted to marry you and live happily ever after. but you planned differently, so............... thanks for teaching me all the ropes of being an absolute bastard.

kabir warning that yeh jo abhi mera haal hai, vansh gonna do it to you, or worse. pftttttttttttt. tell us something we don't already know, loser.

aaaand now he's calling her a fool. she's not the one in chains rn, my man. matlab hadh hai, rassi jal gayi par bal nahi gaya.

anyway blah blah vansh will find out about your deal, he'll kill us both, blah blah blah. whatevs.

riddhima tells guard fellow ki vansh found out about the place and kabir needs to move. guard veryyyyy wisely removes all the chains on kabir, who then gives dhoka by shoving them out the room and slamming the door shut. wonderful.

aryan/ishani bitching about vansh bhai and plotting to bring him downnnnn so that his tyranny will finally end. good. VERY GOOD. get yours, bitchy kanji aankhon waale sibs. main tumhare saath hoon.

vansh reached the jhopdaaaaaaaaaaa. lord i hope riddhima has become nau do gyaraah with kabir by now.

god all these low angle shots of rrahul...................... UNF, man; fucking UNF. 🥵🥵🥵

phew thank god, place is fucken empty.

has something scrawled on the wall tho.

an address......... IN BLOOD. but........... how the fuck would kabir know where riddhima's moving him to and have the time to write it out on the wall???

bwahahahahahahahahahaha and they're bringing kabir to the exact same set, saaaaaame room. man i know budget kam hua hoga OTT ki wajaah se, but there's a million rooms on this set, koi bhi doosra choose kar lete.

anyway, this is the safehouse vyom gave riddhima. good on her for asking for and getting the resources she needs to carry out her nefariousness.

ohhhhhhhhhh, address kabirrrrr ne nahi, RIDDHIMA ne likha tha, galat waala.

loving how she's playing alllllllll these suckers. i know she's not gonna stay winning for long, so imma just enjoy it for the time. *sigh*

precap: vansh's dumb ass finally figured out address fake tha, while riddhima finally gets her hands on the black box. and now he's following her around as she goes to make the drop. BORING!

[phati-sari]

Hello Phati Sari. I asked the question about the suicide attempt. And I just saw the answers about Arnav’s abuse. That is what I am getting at. I feel like he reflected on his feelings for Khushi and realized her innocent or not didn’t matter because he loved her. But I’m not sure he ever reflected on how his actions drove her to the state of mind where she would carefully plan a suicide based on the reasons she gave. And jumping from a one story building could have caused multiple broken bones.

This continues my earlier ask. Couldn’t type anymore. Besides broken bones, head injuries and lacerations could occur. I am at a disadvantage because I don’t speak Hindi so depend on blogs for translation and analysis sometimes. He does say sorry on the way to remarriage but in the light of the real abuse he did I am not sure it showed effectively enough his understanding of that. I just discovered the rewinds where he reflects and I understand he does show it there sometimes but I can find no

To continue. Sorry so long. I can find no English translations for his dialogs in the rewinds. Is there a place you know where some might be available or can you throw some light on pieces of his dialog that shows some deeper understanding of how his actions were abusive and he takes ownership for that abuse aside from Khushi letting him off the hook because she knows he loves her and her tears hurt him too. Sorry that isn’t enough for understanding even in fiction. Please edit ask if need. Than

Hello!

Firstly, I have to say that I think I’ve answered your question already. I realise it was not to your satisfaction, but in my mind I’ve already given my answer. I’m going to answer using specific quotes from your ask to make this a little easier because I think you’re actually asking a different question entirely.

But I’m not sure he ever reflected on how his actions drove her to the state of mind where she would carefully plan a suicide based on the reasons she gave.

But explicitly on-screen, no.

And jumping from a one story building could have caused multiple broken bones. Besides broken bones, head injuries and lacerations could occur.

Well yeah, I wasn’t minimising what could’ve happened. Your earlier question, however, explicitly asked whether Arnav could chalk it up to drama, and I said he could. 

That you didn’t like the answer doesn’t change my outlook -- yes the outcome could’ve been serious but a man who thinks he was duped by this woman’s faux innocence, that she was always trying to entrap or confuse him, could absolutely have come to the conclusion that she was faking her attempt at suicide because she wanted something from him.

To clarify, I’ve never thought her attempt was anything but serious, and have written essays about how much I disagreed with the track being given a comedic treatment.

I just discovered the rewinds where he reflects and I understand he does show it there sometimes

Does he though? I mean, Arnav spends most of his time spouting poetry in the Rewind, not genuinely reflecting on his behaviour. I’ll admit to my bias -- both EJ and Rewind strike me as out-of-character bullshit that I enjoy if the mood strikes me, but they’re not canon in my eyes.

Is there a place you know where some might be available or can you throw some light on pieces of his dialog that shows some deeper understanding of how his actions were abusive and he takes ownership for that abuse aside from Khushi letting him off the hook because she knows he loves her and her tears hurt him too

You’re not going to find this in the canon. I’m sorry, I understand why you’re looking for it, really I do. The closest we get are vague statements in EJ and in the Rewind. 

(This turned into a bit of a live-blog on the Rewind.)

In Episode 1 of the Rewind, Arnav reflects on their first meeting. He says that he was angry at Khushi because his show was ruined. He says that he rained upon her like lava. (Lava?? That’s taken straight from fanfiction my God.)

Arnav: “Aaj yaad karta hoon toh lagta hai ki kitna bura bartaav kiya maine uske saath uss din.” -- When I think about it now, I think of how badly I behaved with her that day. 

He admits to wrongdoing but as it immediately follows a justification, I’m not convinced it’s particularly reflective or deep. He always knew he was wrong -- the countless flashbacks to this meeting showed this in the canon.

In Episode 2, when he talks about the release of the video footage, Arnav smilingly tells the camera that he didn’t realise it would ~complicate~ Khushi’s life so much. This one action invited Shyam into her life and he smiles while he recalls it???

Ugh, this is the episode with the naaaaaavvvvvvv. Naaaaaaaavvvv. Fuck me dead I hate the Rewind so much, anon you’d better send me loads of virtual potatoes for this!

Episode 3, in which Arnav reduces his abuse of the employer-employee relationship with Khushi to a video game in which one has to defeat their opponent.

At least she apparently took the raksha bandhan seriously.

OH MY GOD THE MUG I’D FORGOTTEN THE MUG, BLISSFULLY WIPED IT FROM MY MEMORY. MY EYES. MY EEYYYEEESSS.

In Episode 6, Arnav admits he feels guilty when he thinks of the things he said and made Khushi do on the night of the photoshoot. His punishment is taking his wife to eat parathas -- a punishment Arnav admits is inadequate because he made so many mistakes.

In Episode 7, Arnav admits that regrets many of his decisions in his and Khushi’s story. But he hedges, saying that his mind wasn’t listening to his heart at the time. And then tries to justify his anger by bringing up that she told everyone about Lavanya.

In Episode 8, Arnav says that he gets goosebumps when he thinks about something happening to Khushi at the guesthouse. He says he still gets tears in his eyes when he thinks about how her arm was hurt. And yet, no examination of physical abuse.

In Episode 9, he admits that he’d crossed too many lines and Khushi’s anger was justified when she resigned. He admits that he made her life miserable, that he was “torturing” her. He says that he’d never send her where her life was in danger, though, and that she was wrong in saying that.

Ahh I’d totally spaced on him saying that he’d heard his dhak-dhak for the first time on Teej. 

In Episode 14, Arnav reiterates that he regrets how he treated Khushi, and he wishes they knew what they know now: that they were falling in love.

And then Arnav disappears from the Rewind. His behaviour in the contract marriage and beyond is not reflected on.

I’m not seeing anything in the Rewind that constitutes Arnav showing a deeper understanding of his abusive behaviour and taking ownership of it and its influence on Khushi. I mean, it’s there in the edges of what he says, but it’s not actually what he says. And what he says was always in the serial -- in his monologues, in his flashbacks, in his moments of introspection. It should not be news to anyone.

When I say IPKKND is set in a fantasy world where Arnav’s behaviour is not coded as abusive, I don’t mean and so we shouldn’t examine it through that lense. I mean that the characters will not admit to it being abuse any more than Aragorn is going to comment on the lack of women in LOTR or Aslan is going to say “I’m actually Jesus.” The conclusion that his behaviour is abusive is external to the serial, internally he’s driven by the trauma of the Tragedy and has the blessing of Devi Maiyya.

And so, there is no examination -- internally -- of this behaviour. Even in Lavanya’s case, Arnav never mentions the gross power imbalance and her ready acceptance of his abuse as reasons for the breakup. The show is silent on the topic (though my recaps aren’t) and the audience is left with the genuinely absurd idea that it was about how he didn’t love her. It wasn’t -- he knew he didn’t love her when they first broke up lol. It was about their interaction at the poolside where she admitted he’d never been nice to her. Ever. And that she just accepted as it as a given in their dynamic. Even in the Rewind, Arnav emphasizes that he didn’t love Lavanya, that he only saw her as a friend, instead of admitting he was emotionally abusive.

Coming back to Arnav’s reflection -- Arnav always, always, will be able to justify his point of view. Everyone is the Hero in their own story -- the entire thrust of this blog is to show that.

Now, I don’t need Arnav to say he was abusive -- I know he was, but I also think the redemption he was offered in the serial was fine (I’m qhsahil in that exchange, but I reckon you will agree with the others). I think it was in keeping with the characters shown in the serial and I have absolutely no desire to see any come-upperance or vengeance on Khushi’s behalf.

In conclusion, I get where you’re coming from, and I even understand why you want to see him say and admit these things, but I disagree that we see (or ever will see) them in the canon, or that we even need them in general.

Thanks for asking!

[365days365movies]

March 8, 2021: The Thief of Bagdad (1940) (Part One)

ARABIAN NIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHTS

Aladdin is actually the first film I ever saw in theaters, according to my Mom, and I do adore this movie. In case you’re wondering, I thought the remake was...OK. Not great, not terrible, but...not bad, y’know? But yeah, I love this movie, even if it’s not exactly the most accurate to the original story of Aladdin presented in The Book of One Thousand and One Nights.

Interestingly enough, though, this movie instead takes from a much more recent, much newer source for a lot of its inspiration. And this is going to begin a chronologically-ordered foray into cinematic fantasy. So, back to 1940, in a time period where fantasy films began to explode in popularity, thanks to one film that came one year before.

Yup. The Wizard of Oz, considered one of the greatest films of all time, is still a classic that holds up today, as well as being arguably the most high-profile fantasy film in all of film history.  But a year later, Hungarian-British film director Alexander Korda came out with an often-forgotten film: The Thief of Bagdad. Which was ACTUALLY a remake of a silent film from 1924!

But I’m going with the 1940 British film instead! And honestly, I’m excited enough to just get started here! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (1/2)

Before I get into all of this, I think I need to say this at the jump: this is a film from 1940. Most of the main actors are White. Yeah. Duh. Not ALL of the are, but the two love interests definitely are, alongside the villain. And NONE of the actors are from the region that the film takes place in, except for possibly the extras. So, yeah, thought I should bring that up before anything else. ANYWAY

A ship pulls into port somewhere in ancient Arabia, and before we start here...I can’t even SLIGHTLY comment on the authenticity of this film, costume wise. But in the meantime, I can at least enjoy the color of this film, which are beautifully bright and technicolor.

A mysterious man has come into port, seeking a sleeping princess and a blind beggar. I won’t say the name of the traveler yet, as I don’t know it from the film itself as of yet. He and a young woman named Halima (Mary Morris) go into town to find the blind man, named Ahmad (John Justin).

Speaking for the mysterious traveler, Halima invites Ahmad to a palace, alongside his trusty dog, Abu (a good boy). At said palace, a princess is afflicted with a ceaseless sleep. The man would appear to be an advisor of some kind, and also does not know how to end her sleep. She is apparently in love with the blind beggar.

Said blind beggar is being attended to by many maidens, and to them (and the advisor), he tells a story of his dog’s past life, a street thief also named Abu (Sabu), who’s stealing food, pursued by a group of angry salesman and citizens. He parkours away from them all, keeping one jump ahead of the bread line.

There will be MANY Disney puns, I’m warning you now.

From a rooftop, he sees the young Sultan of the kingdom, Ahmad’s past life, named...Ahmad. He is accompanied by his Grand Vizier: Jaffar (Conrad Veidt). Yup. Really. Also, he’s the same guy playing the advisor from earlier, meaning that this is also HIS past life. Neat!

Like a Vizier do, Jaffar whispers in Ahmad’s ear, trying to get him to do less-than-great things in order to show his power. Ahmad, however, is a kind man, who wishes to show such kindness to his citizens. He goes into the city that night, with Jaffar’s encouragement, in order to discover more about his people. He begins this by listening to a sermon, prophesying that the tyrant Ahmad will fall to Allah’s will. Awkward.

Not that it’s about to matter, since Jaffar tells his men to arrest Ahmad, as he’s now dressed as a citizen, and to claim that he’s a madman if he claims to be the Sultan. It works, and Jaffar is crowned Sultan as Ahmad is thrown in prison. It’s there that Ahmad meets Abu, who’s also been arrested. A madman and a thief.

The two plot to escape from the jail, and Ahmad learns that he’s presumed dead by the populus. After Ahmad realizes that Ahmad’s not mad, but the actual Sultan, they decide to flee to the kingdom of Basra by travelling down the river for three days. Time for a cruise!

We skip ahead quickly to the glorious city of Basra, which is...impressive. It’s genuinely gorgeous, and it was filmed in...THIS ENTIRE THING IS A SET? HOLY SHIT!!! That is legit impressive, goddamn. In Basra, Abu trains Ahmad in the way of subtle thievery and trickery, and they learn of the Sultan of Basra, who has the world’s largest collection of toys, like a proper nerd. He guards his toys more carefully...than he guards his daughter. Well, OK!

Speaking of the Sultan’s Daughter, a commotion clears the marketplace in order to clear a way for a procession, at the center of which is the beautiful Sultan’s daughter, Jasmine. No, not really. But considering that she’s only credited as The Princess (June Duprez)...I’ll be referring to her as Jade.

Attended to by Harlem Renaissance legend...the Singer (Adelaide Hall, who is one of the big figures from the early days of jazz), Jade would appear to be a somewhat bored young women, disaffected by her upper-class life. So, yeah, Jasmine. And Ahmad is, of course, wildly in love with her at first sight.

Ahmad has to see her again, and when Abu notes that they have tickets on a ship helmed by Sinbad the Sailor (trying to set up a 1001 Nights Cinematic Universe, nice), Ahmad insists that he has to see Jade again. Abu agrees, and helps him get into the palace garden.

There, he pretends to be a genie in a pond, using reflections while he hides in a tree. She falls for it (somehow), and he just simps all over her. She notes that she’s come to the pond to bathe, and he notes that he’s paid good money for his OnlyFans subscription, and wants some of that sweet, sweet bathwater. Which sounds like a semi-topical humorous exaggeration, but is BASICALLY THE TRUTH I SWEAR

He reveals himself to be a real live simp, and she responds by IMMEDIATELY kissing him. Goddamn, they’re fuckin’ perfect for each other. They agree, but her father will not be pleased. Still, they pledge to see each other again. Which pisses off Abu, because now he can’t go on that trip and set up this film franchise. He agrees to stay with Ahmad to help him get Jade.

Which is gonna be WAY goddamn harder, since Basra has a new visitor in the form of the usurper, Jaffar. He’s come to meet with the Sultan of Basra (Miles Malleson), a man who is absolutely obsessed with toys, big ol’ nerd that he is. Which, again, is SUPER used in Aladdin. To win over the Sultan’s favor, Jaffar brings in a mechanical horse. And that horse can FUCKING FLY WHAT THE SHIT

And this is when the GF (she says hello) informs me that this is ANOTHER REFERENCE to One Thousand and One Nights! Apparently, there’s a flying mechanical horse called the Ebony Horse, given to a King! It really IS a 1001CU! But back to the original story, and the Sultan WANTS the goddamn horse. In exchange, Jaffar wants only one thing: his daughter. And he immediately agrees.

She ain’t havin’ that shit, and she tells one of her handmaidens to find Ahmad in the garden, and tell him to meet her in Samarkand (another reference!), where she flees to avoid the forced wedding to Jaffar. However, that message doesn’t get to Ahmad soon enough, and he’s arrested in the garden by the palace guards, along with Ahmad.

Overjoyed to finally be able to stab the EVER-LOVING FUCK out of Jaffar, he tries to tell the truth to the Sultan. However, Jaffar uses his magic to...make Ahmad blind. Abu tries to tell the truth instead, only to be...turned into a dog. Wait...it’s not past lives? THEY’RE LITERALLY THE PRINCE AND ABU? Abu is a FUCKING DOG? Damn.

Back in the present day, Ahmad finishes his story, where the maidens tell him of Jade’s fate: she was caught by slave traders and brought back to Basra, where she quickly fell into a trance that she hasn’t awakened from. Although, she apparently still talks in her sleep about the Genie of the Pool.

They take him to see her, and she IMMEDIATELY wakes the fuck up! The two embrace, reunited at last, only for that reunion to be interrupted by Halima, sent by Jaffar to “end the masquerade”. That can’t be good. She takes Ahmad away under false pretenses, and she’s told that she can cure his lost sight by seeing a doctor. Ahmad leaves Abu with her, for protection.

However, this whole thing was just to get Ahmad to wake Jade up, so they could kidnap her and put her on a ship back to Basra. He throws Abu overboard (MOTHERFU-), and goes to speak with the Princess. As she notes that she was roised a cure to Ahmad’s blindness, he claims that the second the two of them embrace, Ahmad will see again. Damn...dude really wants a hug, huh?

AND IT WORKS! Not only is Ahmad able to see again, but Abu is a human again, as both of their curses are broken by a fucking hug. Um...somebody hug this man. Goddamn. The Hays Code is STRONG with this one, holy shit. And it’s ESPECIALLY weird, because Jaffar literally admits that he could MAKE her love him, but wants her true love instead. Um...fuckin’ YIKES, buddy.

As she runs away, he pursues her outside, and they look out to see that they’re being followed in a boat by Ahmad and Abu. And then Jaffar pulls an Elmer Fudd, and goes “NOWTH WINS BWOW”, and summons a storm after the two on the sea.

GREAT place to pause, I think! See you soon, in Part Two!

[ericsonclan]

Strike One

Summary: Minnie and Violet go on a mission together for the first time.

Read on AO3:

Minnie and Violet leapt across the roofs together, silent and graceful as they pursued their target. Someone must have tipped him off that the Order had put out a hit on him because the man had been scurrying from place to place ever since they tracked him down, trying to secure safe passage for himself out of the city. Little did he know that death already awaited him, it was simply a matter of when they would strike.

Minnie looked down from her perch where she knelt upon the roof, studying the man as he desperately argued with an associate. “I wonder what he did to earn the Order’s wrath,”

“Does it matter?” Violet asked, standing beside her. They rarely knew why hits had been put out on their targets. They simply followed the orders, putting their faith within the Order’s judgment.

“It’s something my partner often asks before we go in for the kill. I’ve told he’ll drive himself crazy wondering things like that. Looks like the habit’s rubbed off on me as well,”

“You and your partner have a no kill code as well,” Violet remembered the moment she’d met the pair. They certainly had a different vibe about them than her and Louis, but there was a mutual understanding that came from sharing such an unusual code among assassins.

Minnie nodded. “Wasn’t ever expected to meet other assassins with that same line in place. Mercy extends only so far though. It won’t reach him,” She nodded toward their target. “He’s moving. Looks like we’ll have an opening round the corner,”

The assassins made their way over to the next roof. On the other side was an alleyway, one their target would need to cut through if he wished to stay away from prying eyes. Like clockwork he came round the corner, his eyes darting back and forth in paranoia. Then again, was it paranoia if his fear was well-founded? Without giving the idea further consideration, Minnie shot the grappling hook from the device on her wrist, swinging down from the roof to the alleyway below.

The man looked at her with terror. “So the rumors were true. You have come for me,” His hand shook as he revealed a gun tucked away within his robes, his hand shaking as he pointed it at his would-be killer. “I won’t let you take me that easily,”

Resistance was as futile as his haggard attempts at escape. While Minnie had stood before him, Violet had sneaked up behind. With a quick flick of her blades his throat was cut and his life blood spilled onto the dirt below. The pair of assassins walked out into the open without hesitation, leaving all evidence of their kill in the darkened alleyway.

After the hit had been carried out, their time was their own. Not wanting to return to the bunker so soon, the two girls decided to spend their time roaming the marketplace, tasting local delicacies and examining wares until they both grew weary of the crowds and returned to the roofs. Since this was Violet’s city, she led the way across the rooftops, pointing out different sights and monuments along the way. Eventually they stopped, sitting upon the edge of the roof of a particularly fine home, watching the clouds crawl lazily across the sky.

Minnie found herself enjoying the time together with Violet. It wasn’t often that she worked with other assassins besides James and she’d never spend more than a mission with a single one of them. With the Order calling so many pairs of assassins together however, all of the young assassins seemed to have decided to make the most of whatever time they had and get to know each other in as open a fashion as assassins could. Violet’s willingness to share her city with Minnie warmed the girl’s heart. Though a part of Minnie told her to hold back, there was a deeper part that wanted to pursue things further.

“So, Violet, do you bring others here often?”

“Almost never. No one really knows about this spot besides Louis,”

“I suppose you couldn’t really guide a civilian up here for a date,”

Violet’s brow wrinkled in confusion before her eyes widened. “Oh, uh-”

“Not that this is a date!” Minnie waved her hands, desperate to correct what she’d implied. “But.. maybe it could be?” She sighed, looking out at the skyline. “I’m not good at this. I don’t ‘put on the moves’ very often. Not much reason to most days. But I figured seeing as we’ll be stuck together for who knows how long-”

“I don’t date within the Order,” Violet’s face was flushed, her eyes downcast. “Not like I’d ever had reason to before, but it’s a rule I’m sticking by. It keeps things clean, uncomplicated,”

“Oh… right. It’s a good rule,” Minnie looked over at Violet, studying the blonde. “It’s not like I was looking for a lifelong commitment or anything. Just thought we could have some fun before-”

“I have to go,” Violet rose suddenly, stumbling for a moment before correcting her footing. “Shit. Sorry. It’s not you, it’s me. No, that just sounds like a fucking line… Bye!” With that she leapt from the roof, turning in midair and falling safely within a cart of hay before crawling out and scampering away.

Damn. Didn’t mean to scare her like that. Rules are rules though, I guess. She has them in place for a reason. Minnie lay down, her back resting against the roof as she watched the clouds above her. What a bummer.

---

It was nearly a week later when Minnie saw Violet again. They’d both been gone with various missions, staking out other places in the city and coming back to the bunker rarely. The Order was certainly keeping them busy. Minnie hadn’t even been able to meet all the other assassins yet, only Violet and Louis and Ruby and Aasim. Minnie wondered if there would ever be a time when all the pairs would meet at once.

She currently had no mission but was out and about in search of food. Maybe she could get those kebabs again at the one stall Violet had shown her. Minnie located it quickly, paying for her food and continuing to walk along as she enjoyed her meal. It was then that she saw something that caused her to freeze in her tracks.

Violet was standing by a stall with another girl, a tall Indian woman dressed in teal robes. From the cut of her clothes and her bearing Minnie immediately recognized her as a fellow assassin. She seemed to have bought something from the stall beside them and was turning around to offer it to Violet: a white jasmine flower. She tucked it carefully behind Violet’s ear, smiling at her new look. Violet was smiling as well, clearly charmed by the girl. She took her hand in hers shyly, the two of them making their way through the marketplace together, neither noticing that they had been spotted.

Minnie felt her heart sink inside her. So those lines about it being a rule that she didn’t date within the Order was a lie. Minnie kicked her foot in the dust, feeling crummy. She could’ve just been honest with me. She didn’t feel hungry anymore. Handing her food off to some street urchins she’d seen playing nearby, Minnie headed off once more, her eyes scanning the rooftops for a suitable perch. She needed time to think, alone.

[luciens-one-and-only-sea-otter]

Five Otome/Romance Game Men I Adore

Hai hai many thanks for thinking of me for this tag game @justine-the-guillotine !!

 I always feel pressure to do these things perfectly, even though it’s just talking about things I like :’) so please bear with me in my, probably, screaming appreciation. I’ve been thinking of a list a characters for a whole day and honestly I’m suddenly blanking,,, who do I adore? lol who knows,,, Well actually you are about to know cause I am going to tell you LOL. OkAY. Enough of this blabbering, onto the list of many mens.

Please know I am excluding Lucien (MLQC) because it is obvious that I adore him to a fucking fault. If you want to see me do a whole appreciation about those him just hmu in my asks or message me and I will go on for days bby

This list is in no way order of most to least adored, I physically could not make that kind of decision jkdfjksdfh. ALSO PLS KNOW I DO SWEAR LIKE A FUCKING SAILOR AND I TALK OF SMUSHING LOVELIES OFTEN. IT”S JUST MY PERSONALITY SO SHHHHH IF YOU DON”T LIKE IT DON”T READ IT BOO, THAT SIMPLE!

Takeda Shingen (Ikemen Sengoku) - Okay, I will be honest, I was very skeptical of sengoku period romance games because I had played some in the past,,, but holy shit, Shingen blew me away. He quickly rose up the ranks of otome men in my heart, and I think about him at least once a day now. I related so much with his MC because it was so hard not to lust and swoon over that man. I have no idea how or when I fell hard for him but it happened and I am not mad at all. I self insert so much with my games,,, and it’s easy for me to slip my real feelings into my fantasies. And honestly I really wish I could have Shingen IRL, ~~though I’m sure I would absolutely freak out and hide under a rock if he ever paid me any attention. He represents the perfect man, lover, and husband to me; he’s on a god level kind of man. Shingen is compassionate, knows boundaries and has never restricted MC from doing anything she loved (without good reason), he’s reliable and strong in a way that makes my heart melt. AND  LET’S NOT FORGET HOW FUCKING BRILLIANT THIS MAN IS, HE IS SO FUCKING SMART AND I WISH CYBIRD LET US SEE HIS EXTREME INTELLIGENCE MUCH MORE,,,, He’s just so damn perfect it is near infuriating how good of a man he is. He fits my normal type so well; me saying “Tall, Handsome, Flirtatious, Sexy as Fuck and Infuriating” might of as well have been about Mr Takeda “I’ll marry you and give you everything for one smile” Shingen. I also really like characters that are loyal to their loved ones (yes in contrast to my bastard villain type kink, I also love those who show loyalty and devotion to the people they love) Shingen does more than enough of all of and I really do look up to him as a person and model for character,,,,, oh gods, and the way I imagine he would make sweet baby making love to ---*cough cough* ALRIGHT LETS STOP HERE BEFORE THIS BECOMES A WHOLE ASS SHINGEN APPRECIATION POST!!!

Sirius Oswald (Ikemen Revolution) - I’m really tempted to just insert a daddy kink meme and leave it at that,,,, He is my absolute top otome man, or rather,,, one of my top “I wish you were real and we were married” men. As much as I whore around and claim to love a new man the most (besides Lucien because they’re on the same level now) every week,,, I will always come back to Mr. Flower Daddy. He holds such a precious spot in my heart, I can only try to explain the things that he makes me feel. Like a giddy school girl in love for the first time, but in this story they end up together. High school sweetheart kind of love that lasts till they’re old and wrinkled with time. Gods, thinking about Sirius makes me sob and my wallet sob harder . I must have a thing for men who keep denying their affections for MC (aka me self insert) because of things like responsibility, friendship, being labelled an old geezer,,etc. I have played his route about eight times over (probably) by now, it’s a little upsetting that his route wasn’t as spicy as his side content. Please Cybird, let Mr. Flower Daddy be the sexy and dramatic man he can be. I love the way he cares for others, how hard he works to achieve the bonds and peace he has now for not only everyone he loves, but for the country they all live in as well. His many layers intrigue me, seeing his reactions as well ughhhh I love this man so fucking much, how do people irl deal with love like this? I’m sitting here dreaming over Sirius Oswald,,, and his,,, big hands,,, Never have I held such large and terrifyingly real emotions and lust for an otome character. The man just screams let daddy take care of you baby but also let daddy wreck your pretty whore mouth, little lady or maybe that’s just me projecting my kinks onto this pure (lol) man. Not only is his body, heart, and morals absolutely stunning, HE IS ANOTHER INCREDIBLY INTELLIGENT BEING AND I CANNOT STRESSSSS HOW MUCH I FIND SMART PEOPLE INCREDIBLY SEXY AND THE WAY HE USES HIS TALENTS TO SUBTLY AID HIS LOVED ONES UGHHHHHH I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEE. GODS PLEASE LET ME BREAK INTO THE SIXTH DIMENSION AND MARRY THIS MAN!!!! 

Kent (Amnesia Memories) - OKAY LET ME JUST SAYYYY HE IS THE BIGGEST BABY AND BIGGEST MAN AT THE SAME TIME AND YOU CAN FIGHT ME ON THIS IDC BUT HIS OUTFIT IS THE SHIT!!! FUCK YOU BELT HATERS!!! His outfit and his love slaps like the wholesome man he is. Absolutely I would love to h*ld his h@nds and give him the best smooches I can give. Because that is what he deserves. I really loved this game, growing to love Kent was easy despite his big brain fucker throwing math questions at me from time to time. I’m not sure what makes me like Kent so damn much, but I do and that’s what matters skjdfdskjfh. He is so damn precious,,, you all know those  “you so fucking precious when you smile” song video thingies? That is exactly how I feel about Kent. He’s so damn precious I want him to be happy always. And I will fight anyone who bullies him hnnn. 

Myeong Hwi aka Theodore Wilson + Lee Gun Wook aka William Harris (Mystic Code) - Mystic Code used to be one of my favs, till they did the whole updating and redoing the story thing, with no full voiced lines etc (I really hope they bring that back). But two stood out to me the most was Captain Wilson and Lieutenant Harris. Both have very strong personalities and care for the greater good, and thick as fuck lets be real with that dom energy . I adore men with strong and noble (?? is this the right word??) personalities and also possess a compassionate heart. As Theo is with the MIU team members and Will is with MC. 

Theodorus Van Gogh (Ikemen Vampire) - whoallowedthismantobethisfuckingattractiveandlegal??????  *insert his magic mike CG* I have played Theo’s route in JP a few times, once to completion but knowing him in the EN version I am already absolutely in love with this man. How this came to be? Maybe it’s his bittersweet personality, the way he cares for MC in the same way Sirius does, but he’s a bit more brash about it than Sirius. I absolutely adored his character growth in his route and as you get to know him better he opens up more and more, ahh the tsundere is quite the cute trait XD. He is strong willed and passionate, he is caring of his loved ones, he is loyal to his family, blood or found, and he is an absolutely attentive loving person. Why ask for more when you can just love Theodorus Van Gogh? He is the absolute softy packed into a large brooding and brash package with a shiny 8-pack abs that I wish to slather maple syrup on and lap up for the love of----  for someone who loves pancakes so much. And I very much admire his drive to do what he wants and needs to do to the absolute best of his ability. His will to thrive for the best he can get has me swooning. He truly is a breath taking man,,, whether that be because he is being a complete sweetheart all of the sudden or he’s whipping you some nasty insult that is itching for a rebut.

Alright, that’s it! I cheated a little lololll but there aren’t any rules so >;3c I can do as I wish. 

I uhhhhhhh don’t interact with many other otome blogs T^T (but maybe you can change that hwehwe) so I won’t be tagging anyone. However, if you do see this and want to join in and tag your friends pls do!!! Share the love, pass it on, scream about more 2D mans.

[just-come-baek]

with friends like you, who needs enemies?

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader ft. mentions of Jimin and his girlfriend

Themes: smut | fluff | friends’ friends to friends to lovers!au | domestic!au | roommate!jimin |

Word count: 11.1k

Summary: Setting up my friend with my roommate is one thing, but walking on them banging on my fancy couch is just… plainly wrong. Not only have they profaned my comfy piece of furniture, but also they’ve neglected our friendship. Completely forgotten, Jungkook and I start to hang out together, but after some time things become a bit too comfortable…

Warnings: overuse of cringe-worthy euphemisms for sex, lots of complaining, unprotected sex and so on;

***

Me | 22:43 | don’t you want to hang out with Jimin???

Me | 22:43 | I need him out of the house

It was my first time texting Jungkook. It felt weird, but it needed to be done. Ever since Jimin and Jiwoo started dating, they were bumping their uglies in Jimin’s room, and I was done with hearing their lewd moans.

These damned thin walls.

Jeon | 22:45 | what did he do this time?

I read Jungkook’s reply, and with my bottom lip puckered, I wondered what I should type so he wouldn’t think I was exaggerating. I couldn’t straight out ask him to call Jimin over to his place because the sex noises coming out of my roommate’s bedroom were louder than my film on the maximum volume.

Me | 22:46 | he’s porking Jiwoo

Jeon | 22:46 | HE’S DOING WHAT???

Jeon | 22:47 | oh, nvm

Jeon | 22:47 | just googled it

Me | 22:48 | yeah, they’ve been screwing everyday this week

Me | 22:48 | can you cockblock him?

Me | 22:48 | just this once

Me | 22:49 | please???

Jeon | 22:49 | can’t do

Of course, he wouldn’t do it! What had I expected? Jimin and Jungkook are best friends with their bro-code and what not, while Jungkook and I are mere acquaintances with maybe five hellos exchanged through the entirety of it.

Jeon | 22:51 | sorry, I’m gaming with Tae

Me | 22:53 | of course you do

I was a little bit angry when I wrote it, but I understood him. It wasn’t his problem to deal with, and if he were struggling with a similar kind of issue, I wouldn’t help him either. I’m the one who had agreed to share a flat with Jimin, and regardless of how much I regret it now, I’m the one who suggested them to go on that fucking date.

It was my first attempt at matchmaking anybody, and since it backfired so terribly, I was sure, it was also my last attempt.

Jeon | 22:52 | you can crash on my couch if they bother you so much

That was unexpected; Jungkook was showing me kindness, and I had no idea how to react. We had never hung out alone, and he was offering me a place to sleep. Admittedly, if he had such an annoying roommate, I’d let him suffer.

Thankfully, he was a good guy.

Jeon | 22:53 | I’m going to game all night but I still think they’re louder

Me | 22:54 | seriously?

Me | 22:55 | no take backs

Jeon | 22:55 | you remember where I live, right?

Jimin had taken me once to a small party at Jungkook’s, and though I couldn’t remember the building number, I knew how it looked like and how to get there. It would probably take me fifteen minutes of walk to reach it.

Me | 22:56 | sure

Me | 22:56 | thank you!

Me | 22:56 | I owe you one 

***

Jungkook didn’t lie when he said he’d be quieter than Jimin and Jiwoo; when I entered his apartment, he just smiled and muttered make yourself at home, and with that, Jungkook was gone in his bedroom, gaming.

It wasn’t unpleasant, but it was weird – to be in his living room alone.

His flat was rather tidy and comfortable, and it was evident it belonged to a man. Lazily, I fished a book out of my bag; it was the second book of a shitty trilogy, and despite wanting to pull all my hair out whenever I flipped the page, I couldn’t stop reading it.

I started reading, but it was difficult without acceptable background noise. With my finger marking the page, I paused, stood up and marched toward Jungkook’s room. Having knocked, I pushed the doors slightly open, and asked, “Do you mind if I hang out here for a while? It’s still early, and I have a fucked-up sleeping schedule.”

Jungkook turned his head toward me and nodded. Smiling, I closed the doors behind me and lay down on his bed. He was sitting in his fancy gaming chair, and had an expensive-looking headset; it was evident he took his hobby very seriously.

“Are you having a girl over?” I heard, probably Taehyung, since he had mentioned his name earlier, say through Jungkook’s headphones since this boy apparently didn’t mind loud game sounds.

“It’s just Jimin’s roommate; Jimin and his girlfriend are shagging way too loud, so I let her stay at my place,” Jungkook explained, and I shrugged, returning to my book.

“She’s at your place? You should totally hook up with her,” Taehyung encouraged Jungkook, and I giggled, ignoring the indecent advice. We barely knew each other, and no matter how good Jungkook must be at sex, it wasn’t happening. Tempting – very tempting, but I wouldn’t let it happen. I didn’t need more drama at this point in my life.

“You better focus on the game or else I’m gonna let them kill you!” Jungkook yelled into the microphone, and Taehyung immediately stopped teasing him. Though I wasn’t sure, I presumed that Jungkook was a skilled player that no one fancied getting on his wrong side.

It was a calm night, yet a few annoyed groans still escaped his mouths whenever Jungkook’s team was losing. I wasn’t better at keeping my reactions at bay, especially when the lead character did something incredibly stupid, and I wished her boyfriend turned out to be a serial killer, obsessed with the idea to murder her.

“You know what? I’m done playing with you for tonight,” Jungkook barked when they lost another battle because of Taehyung. Angrily, he threw the headset on the desk, and running his fingers through his hair, he swiveled in his gaming chair, staring at me lying comfortably.

“It wasn’t your day, was it?” I asked though I was still focused on the book.

“It’s them,” Jungkook said, pointing at the computer behind him. “It wasn’t their day; I’m way too good to have bad episodes.” He explained, and I hummed, even though I didn’t care. No matter how Jungkook seemed to love gaming, it wasn’t my cup of tea, and I wasn’t going to pretend to enjoy it so he would like me. I was still polite enough to listen to whatever bothered him, though.

“Is it interesting?” Jungkook asked, tilting his head, mentioning the book in my hands.

“Oh God, no,” I sighed in relief as I slammed the novel close for dramatic purposes. “Do you want to watch a movie or something?” I proposed, and Jungkook smiled casually.

“I’d drunk five energy drinks before you came here; I won’t fall asleep for at least two days, so a movie sounds pretty awesome.” Jungkook clarified, and I sat up, staring at him.

“Do you have anything in mind? I’m fine with whatever,” I said, smiling. As long as I hadn’t seen a film before, it should be alright.

“We can just look through my Netflix recommendations; there should be something interesting.” Jungkook proposed, and I nodded, following him to the living room. “Do you want anything to eat?” He asked politely, but before I answered him, he added, “I have only unhealthy snacks, though. I hope you don’t mind it.”

“There’s no such a thing like a healthy snack,” I remarked, sitting down on the couch, while Jungkook pranced to the kitchen to get us food. Within two minutes, he took a seat beside me and placed a large bag of chips and a six-pack of beer on the coffee table.

“So… how are the lovebirds?” Jungkook asked curiously, as he took a sip of the chilled beer.

“They’re good, maybe even too good for my liking,” I admitted honestly, looking at Jungkook who grabbed the remote and turned the TV on. “Jiwoo has her own flat; I have no idea why they keep hitting skins in Jimin’s room. I was the one who set them up! I swear they’re trying to spite me!” I ranted on, and Jungkook chuckled while looking for a catching movie title.

“They've probably forgotten you exist. Do you know how many times Jimin came over here ever since their first date?” Jungkook asked, and I shook my head. Yes, Jimin’s my friend, but no, he doesn’t relate everything he does – for which I’m very thankful. “Zero.”

“Oh, it is nice knowing I’m not the only one left out,” I muttered.

“It doesn’t have to be a bad thing,” Jungkook carried on, and I raised my head, looking at him, waiting for elaboration. “You finally can do whatever you want without getting disturbed. Spoil yourself before they start to cling to you again.”

In some odd way, he made sense. Jiwoo and Jimin were so busy rolling in the hay; I might as well use my free time to relax.

“I just might.”

***

The very next weekend, Jimin asked me if I minded him throwing a party at our apartment; it was their third week together, and they decided to celebrate it with their closest friends. What kind of anniversary even was that?

“As long as you’re the one tidying I don’t mind,” I snickered, trying to get something extra out of this situation. I was actually in a mood for a small gathering, but Jimin didn’t have to know that. “What do you say?”

“Ugh, fine,” Jimin gave in quickly, looking around the mess in the living room which was solely my creation. “What did I tell you about getting your shoes on the shoe-shelf? I’m not perfect, but you better put them there, or I’m gonna throw them away,” Jimin warned me, as he picked up my trainer and threw it across the room.

“I love you, too,” I cooed, smiling at Jimin who was cursing me under his breath. “Do you want me to cook anything?” I shouted before he disappeared into the confines of his room, dramatically slamming the doors.

Two hours later, he cooled down enough to hold a conversation with me, and although he said I didn’t have to cook anything, he gave me a long-ass shopping list. He didn’t want me around when he was cleaning up because he knew I’d make another mess, so sending me to the supermarket was the only reasonable option left.

“I told them to bring booze, so don’t but too much alcohol,” Jimin told me, as he handed me some cash which should cover most of the costs.

“Don’t worry, I’m really good at shopping,” I assured him before I put the money in my wallet. “Have I ever failed you?”

“Only today you’ve failed me like four times,” Jimin stated straightforwardly, and I wanted to jab him in the eye with a pencil for giving me that attitude. “And it’s barely noon!”

“Wow,” I said, sounding a tad bit overdramatic. “You did not say that!”

“I did yes,” Jimin retorted, and I refrained myself from harming him regardless of how much pleasure it would bring me. “And now get going, don’t hurry.”

***

Though I could invite my friends, no one could make it on such short notice. Well… except for Jiwoo, but she was too busy making out with Jimin to keep me company. I was still convinced I’d have a great time, though. I knew Jimin’s friends, and since he had better things to do than mingling with his guests, I took the role of the host on myself.

“Hi, what’s up?” I asked as soon as I approached Taehyung and Jungkook who were enthusiastically chatting with each other. Probably about that game which they had been playing the last time; I understood none of their jabber, so it must’ve been it.

“It’s cool, but I still don’t get it; they’ve been dating for three weeks. What kind of anniversary is that?” Jungkook whined, and I giggled, hearing my previous thoughts leave his mouth. Thankfully, I wasn’t the only one wondering about it.

“My words exactly,” I exclaimed, interjecting him. “Do you know any drinking games? I think it’s about time we play one.”

“What about most likely?” Taehyung proposed, and I looked at him curiously. I had never played that game, and I didn’t know the rules, so he had to explain it to me. “It’s quite easy, and hopefully, we can get drunk really quickly.”

One person asks a ‘most likely’ question, and then all players point at whoever seems most likely to do so. The person, who gets the maximum number of fingers pointing at them, drinks. It sounded easy, and when Taehyung explained it to me, Jungkook looked for more players to make it even more interesting.

At first, we started with easy questions, but after a couple of rounds, everyone got a bit competitive, and it became quite dirty. I wasn’t surprised, it was bound to happen. We all were college students, after all.

“Who would be most likely to have a threesome with twins?” Hoseok asked, and without thinking, I counted to three and pointed at him. Pretty much like everyone else. Hoseok was a fuckboy, and I was sure he had tried it before at least once.

“You know the rules,” Namjoon mocked Hoseok when the latter tried to bullshit his way out of his punishment. “Bottoms up!”

“Ugh, I hate you guys,” he complained but emptied his bottle anyway.

“Who would be most likely to give a shitty head?” Yoongi inquired, being another one in the queue. It wasn’t as easy as the previous question, but I only got three seconds to make up my mind, so I panicked, randomly pointing my finger at Jungkook.

“What are you guys playing?” Jiwoo asked as she approached our group, Jimin being right beside her. They were sickeningly in love, but eventually, they remembered they had guests. “You don’t mind if we play, do you?”

Taehyung quickly explained the rules for the fourth time this evening, and when they were filled in, Jiwoo was the first one to play.

“Who would be most likely to have sex in a public place?” She voiced, and without even counting, I pointed at Jimin. Maybe I hadn’t walked on them knocking boots yet, but I had a feeling neither of them would be expressly turned down by the prospect of hooking up in such circumstances. They were unquestionably too sex-crazed to care.

The game continued for another thirty minutes; it was fun, but Hoseok grossed everyone out before they managed to discover all my dirty secrets.

“You seriously think I give the worst head?” Jungkook straightforwardly asked when he caught me alone in the kitchen when I was getting another bottle of beer.

“I wouldn’t put that much thought to it if I were you,” I stated casually, hoping he would dismiss that subject. “Don’t take it personally, my choice was completely random.”

“I’m just messing with you,” Jungkook declared, and I chuckled as the alcohol started kicking in. I was feeling lightheaded, and whatever Jungkook said made me beam at him.

“Shame, I was about to lash out at you for choosing me as the most likely get pregnant with a one-night stand. I mean… what the fuck, Jeon?” I asked dramatically, but after three seconds of looking into his eyes, I cracked.

“Well… you were the only single girl playing with us, who should I pick?” Jungkook spoke defensively, and I shook my head, laughing. “I didn’t have a choice, did I?”

“You did not,” I answered, as I sat on the kitchen counter. “There’s a bag of shredded cheese in the fridge, do you mind handing me some?”

“Should’ve thought about your snack before you put that cute butt on the counter,” Jungkook snickered, as he opened the refrigerator only to get a chilled bottle of beer, completely ignoring my humble request.

“So you’re gonna be a mean friend,” I wondered out loud, swinging my legs from side to side. “I should’ve seen it coming.” I sighed, hoping I could shoot lasers with my eyes because Jungkook was being a dick.

“What about some shots instead?”

***

Though it was weird, I didn’t particularly hate their odd anniversaries. However, when Jiwoo forgot about the horror marathon, I seriously thought I was going to pour acid on her face for ditching me like that. The tickets were pretty pricey, yet she dared to stand me up one hour before the screening.

What a selfish bitch!

How dare she pick Jimin over me?

At first, I weighed the pros and cons of going alone, but then I decided to find a replacement; it’s not like Jiwoo was my only friend…

Maybe I had plenty of friends, but none of them were available at such a short notice. A friend in need is a friend indeed… such bullshit! Apparently, I was surrounded by fakes.

Sighing, I scrolled through my contact list looking for someone who would like to tag along. And then my thumb hovered above Jungkook’s name. We hadn’t talked since that party, and although it was so out of the blue to ask him to go to the movies with me, he seemed to be my last resort. He hadn’t let me down the last time, and I didn’t expect him to do it now.

Me | 20:46 | are you busy tonight?

Me | 20:47 | Jiwoo stood me up again

Jeon | 20:51 | oh… she did?

Me | 20:51 | yeah

Me | 20:51 | there’s a horror marathon tonight, and she canceled on me

Me | 20:51 | and the tickets are nonrefundable!

Me | 20:52 | they’re going to meet his parents

Me | 20:53 | can you believe it?

Jeon | 20:54 | wow

Jeon | 20:54 | at this pace they’re gonna marry in two months

Me | 20:55 | I guess

Me | 20:55 | what about the cinema?

Me | 20:55 | do you wanna go???

Me | 20:56 | I can go alone but that’d be lame

Jeon | 20:57 | it’s tonight?

Jeon | 20:57 | I was gonna hit the gym, but I guess I can skip once

Me | 20:57 | thanks!!!

Me | 20:58 | you’re the best!!!

***

“Do you want anything?” Jungkook asked me when we walked beside the cinema bar; the popcorn smelled delicious, and if I hadn’t eaten a large supper at home, my mouth would definitely water. “You don’t want me to give you money for the ticket, so the least I can do is buy you some snacks,” Jungkook argued, but I dismissed him.

“No, you don’t have to,” I assured him, as we sat in a vacant sofa in the lobby. “Jiwoo paid for her ticket, and she said I could do anything with it, so I’m treating you. You’re the only one who could make it anyway.” I explained, and Jungkook sighed, not knowing how to convince me to agree to his proposition. “Besides, I owe you for the last time,” I remembered, and Jungkook almost growled in irritation.

“But seriously, it’s just a cup of coke and a bucket of popcorn. It’s not a big deal,” Jungkook carried on, and I just rolled my eyes.

“But it’s so overpriced,” I reasoned, and Jungkook ran his hand through his hair in frustration, not knowing how to win this argument. I had a point, and what was wrong with me treating him? I owed him, so I was just paying my debt with no attempt to hurt his ego whatsoever.

“Ok, fine, so I’ll go over there and buy something for myself,” Jungkook announced before he walked off to stand in a line. “And if you happen to try to steal some later, I’m gonna smack that hand,” he warned me shouting from over his spot in the queue, making a dozen of heads turn, suddenly curious about our small quarrel.

Smiling, I got off the sofa, joining Jungkook by his side. I knew I was right, but Jungkook was so adorably stubborn, and I just had to give in. And the crowd which was pressuring me wasn’t making it any easier.

“Which popcorn do you want?” Jungkook asked me when it was finally our turn to order. “Personally, I prefer regular one, but if you like caramel one, I can make an exception.”

“I prefer regular one, too,” I answered casually, not wanting to order longer than necessary; the first movie was about to start in five minutes, and around ten people were still in the queue behind us. “So hurry up, we’re gonna miss all the commercials!”

“Ugh, fine, and what do you want to drink?” Jungkook asked, and I quickly said coke. “It wasn’t that difficult now, was it?” He added mockingly, handing me the bucket of popcorn.

Quickly, we found our seats.

Well… one double seat. I should’ve known better not to let Jiwoo buy the tickets. Even though she had Jimin to cuddle with, she wouldn’t miss a chance to sneak her arm around mine. And while I was used to Jiwoo being clingy, with Jungkook sitting next to me, it felt awkward. Thank God, I hadn’t seen the projected movies yet, so I was going to focus on the screen, and not the handsome man beside me.

The lights went out, and the eerie music began to play; I was excited, and I hoped for the first horror movie to be exciting and spooky. It was okay; it didn’t frighten me at all, and I predicted the ending correctly, but at least I laughed when someone in the audience shrieked at one of the jump-scares. The second one was much worse, though. Somehow through it, I fell asleep, only to be stirred awake by Jungkook during the third movie when my head slid on his shoulder.

“Sorry…” I whispered, rubbing my eyes, trying not to fall asleep again.

“It’s okay, you didn’t miss anything anyway,” Jungkook added, and I smiled, wrapping myself in my jacket warmly before I dozed off again.

***

The next time I messaged Jungkook wasn’t because I was annoyed with the lovebirds’ shenanigans; I really liked his company and frankly wanted to hang out with him. He was the only one within my circle of friends who had time to meet up. Among my friends, he was the only one I could actually rely on these days.

Me | 18:43 | what are you up to?

Jungkook didn’t disappoint; two minutes later I saw three little dots as he typed his reply.

Jeon | 18:46 | I was just about to leave for the gym

Jeon | 18:46 | what happened?

Jeon | 18:47 | are they bothering you again?

Me | 18:48 | Nah

Me | 18:48 | I’m bored

Jeon | 18:49 | oh

Me | 18:50 | we could go together to the public gym...

Jeon | 18:51 | but they’re shit!

Jeon | 18:51 | and only old people exercise there!

Me | 18:52 | please???

Me | 18:52 | I’m really bored

Jeon | 18:53 | ughhhhh

Jeon | 18:54 | meet you there in 20

***

“You have to warm up first,” Jungkook announced when I was about to start my workout. “How about doing two laps around the park?” He proposed, and I rolled my eyes, thinking it wasn’t that great idea to join him on his training.

“Are you serious? It’s not a warm-up, you’re trying to kill me,” I whined, having no intention of running. “When I said I’d join you, I meant that I would laze around beside you when you work out, and not actually working out myself, you know…”

Jungkook tongued his cheek, glancing at me from head to toe. “If you’re going to laze around, you’ll never get rid of those spaghetti legs, you know…” he mocked, and I gritted my teeth, staring at him angrily.

“You did not say that,” I spoke slowly, and Jungkook just shrugged nonchalantly.

“Oh, I did,” he replied, and if I didn’t hate running so much, I would sprint toward him and smack that smirk off his face. “A little bit of sport won’t do you any harm.”

“You could cut me some slack, it’s my first attempt of exercising in months,” I reasoned, hoping he would understand me. “Besides, I don’t want to be ripped like you,” I added, and then an idea popped into my mind. “How about you run those two laps and I’ll time you?”

“Or maybe we should bet?”

“What are you thinking about?”

“If you run one lap faster than I run two, you win, and I treat you to some ice-cream later,” Jungkook explained, and I tried my best not to smile mischievously. Sure, I hadn’t done sports in a while, but back in the day, I had been a rather fast runner. Maybe, I was a little out of shape right now, but I couldn’t be that bad to lose this bet.

“I’m not sure…” I trailed on dubiously.

“Come on, don’t be a chicken,” Jungkook egged on, and I gave in without further complaining. “I knew you wouldn’t back out of a challenge.”

“What can I say? I’m competitive, just like you.”

Having sealed the bet with a firm hand-shake, we established the finishing line. It was a long distance, but Jungkook had no chance running two laps faster than I did one. Perhaps, I’d lose one lung during the run, but it was the risk I was willing to take if that meant free ice-cream.

“Good luck,” Jungkook said, winking at me before he took off at his maximum speed. Shaking my head, I sprinted as fast as I could, even though I knew he wouldn’t outpace me.

My legs were hurting, my breath was shallow, and I could feel the blood taste in my mouth. I was definitely out of shape, but the finishing line was within now 100 meters, and Jungkook was still way behind me.

“Oh shit,” I looked over my shoulder and saw Jungkook who was running like his life depended on it. He didn’t seem to tire at all, so I sped, using the last bits of energy.

The second I ran through the finishing line, I almost collapsed on the ground as my legs felt like noodles which weren’t able to support my weight. Panting, I sat on the grass and leaned in, having my head between my knees as I gasped for air.

“Okay, you won this one,” Jungkook muttered, breathing heavily. “And I hope you’ve warmed up for the rest of the training.” He stretched his arm, helping me to stand up.

“I have enough of this training already,” I complained as I followed behind him.

“Fine, I won’t torture you today; let’s just get ice-cream.”

***

It has been almost two months since the first time I initiated contact with Jungkook in order to keep my mind off Jimin and Jiwoo’s antics. Ever since then, Jungkook and I became very tight, and at some point, I considered him a better friend that Jiwoo or Jimin have ever been. At least, he was flexible enough to meet up with me when I really needed someone. Out of all of my friends, Jungkook proved himself to be the only one I could always rely on.

Without any hesitation, I could call him my best friend.

Usually, it was me who initiated contact, but this time, it was Jungkook who reached out to me, asking me if I had any plans for tonight. I had three exams on Monday, but I still had two spare days to study, so I asked him what he had on mind.

Me | 17:41 | What are you planning?

Jeon | 17:42 | Nothing much… I’m just bored

Jeon | 17:42 | I thought about a movie marathon

Jeon | 17:42 | What do you say???

Jeon | 17:42 | I have snacks

Having hung out with me, Jungkook already knew what to say to pique my interest.

Me | 17:43 | Ok, I’m interested

Me | 17:43 | What are we watching tonight?

Jeon | 17:44 | I don’t know…

Jeon | 17:44 | maybe some action movies?

Me | 17:45 | sounds good

Me | 17:45 | I’ll be over at your place in 30

Jeon | 17:45 | OK, I’m waiting

Quickly, I put my phone away, quickly getting ready to leave. I took my books out of my purse and packed some clothes to sleep in, cosmetics for washing off my make-up before sleep and an extra bottle of plum wine in case we would run out of alcohol.

Within ten minutes, I was ready to leave. Quietly, I exited my room, and then, screamed in shock when Jimin scared the shit out of me. “What the hell are you doing here?” I asked as I pressed my hand against my chest, trying to calm down my beating heart. What was he doing inside the house? What was he doing without Jiwoo? They were attached to the hip – ever since they started going out, I have never seen them separately. Did they have a fight? Did they break up? What the hell was going on?

“Where are you going?” Jimin asked me as he sat up. Staring at me, and then at my bag, he furrowed his eyebrows, trying to figure out where I was headed. “So…” he waited for my answer, but I didn’t want to tell him about Jungkook, knowing he was going to tease me about it, and probably, even try to set me up with him. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind taking our friendship to another level, but if anything was going to stem from it, I wanted it to happen naturally, and not because friends in a relationship wanted me to be in a relationship, too. “Have you finally got yourself a boyfriend?”

I’d love to sneak out to see my boyfriend, but it wasn’t happening, so I only rolled my eyes at him. “What boyfriend? You know I’m not seeing anybody.” I answered honestly, and Jimin sighed, as he evidently wanted me to get laid. “But what is really weird; what are you doing here? Trouble in paradise?” I fired the question as I sat down beside him.

“No, it’s nothing like that.” Jimin quickly denied, and I nodded my head in acknowledgment, waiting for the explanation. Regardless of them forgetting about my existence, they were still my friends, and I cared about them. “Jiwoo’s mother has sent her to a dieting trip, and although I told them that she’s perfect and she doesn’t need to lose any more weight, they didn’t listen to me. She’s going to come back next week; until then, we can only text.”

“You will survive.”

“Of course, I’m going to survive, but I’d rather didn’t have to, you know,” Jimin trailed off, and then, I smiled, trying to disguise my disgusted reaction; they were so sickeningly in love, and I wanted to vomit whenever I witnessed the affection they were showering each other with. “So where are you going? Can I tag along? I need something to keep myself busy when Jiwoo can’t reply me.”

“Sorry, can’t do,” I quickly answered as I stood up and took my bag off the floor. “Lisa’s boyfriend of two years dumped her, and we’re going to console her. She likes you, but you’re too happy with Jiwoo to be any help to her.”

“Oh, I see,” Jimin said, a bit disappointed that he couldn’t accompany me. He understood that it wasn’t the best idea for him to go with me. Thankfully, he didn't inquire any further. “Tell her that this guy is a jerk. She deserves better, anyway.”

“Sure,” I answered, as I ran to the doors. In no time, I put my shoes on and threw my jacket over my shoulders. I told Jungkook that I'd see him in 30 minutes, and because of this chit-chat with Jimin, I was running a bit late.

***

“You’re late,” said Jungkook as soon as he opened the doors for me. I looked up, trying to apologize and explain that I was trying to blow Jimin off, but Jungkook just shrugged, smiling at me. “I’m just kidding. It’s no big deal. Come on in, I’m making cheese nachos.”

“Ooh… sounds tasty, I have never eaten cheese nachos,” I said, as I closed the doors behind me and took off my shoes.

“You can’t be serious! It’s impossible, everybody has eaten it at some point,” Jungkook spoke, very confused that I have never tasted it.

“There’s always a first time for everything,” I replied, as I followed behind him, sitting in a chair, inhaling the delicious smell of nachos. “So… what are we watching?”

“I don’t know; what about some Marvel movies?” Jungkook proposed, and I sighed, not convinced about his choice. He was a hardcore fan, so he was probably trying to force this hobby on me, too. Spiderman was kinda cute, but it wasn’t enough to convince me to start watching all of the movies from the superhero franchise.

“I don’t feel like it. Maybe some other time,” I trailed off, as I watched Jungkook prepare the nachos. It looked like a simple recipe, but I still appreciated the view in front of me and the effort he put into making it. Although it was actually inappropriate to have these kinds of thoughts about friends, I couldn’t help myself; Jungkook was a snack, but when he was bustling around the kitchen, he was just irresistible.

“OK, let’s go,” Jungkook spoke, pulling me out of my train of thought. Carefully, he carried the trey with nachos to the living room. “I’m actually fine with anything,” he said as he sat down on the couch, turning on his laptop.

It was difficult to pick anything. One of Jungkook’s friends, Namjoon, recommended him Friends to polish his English, and since I had seen the majority of episodes, I proposed to watch Criminal Minds. After what it felt like an hour, for the sake of the stiffing cheese, we decided to compromise – every two episodes of Friends, we were going to watch one of Criminal Minds, and since the duration was almost even, I complied.

 “It is fun hanging out with you like that,” Jungkook said during the third episode of Criminal Minds. Currently, Spencer Reid was in the frame, and I was grinning like an idiot while munching on the rest of nachos. “I mean it; even when you fan-girl over that guy way too hard,” he joked, and I looked at him sternly, not liking his tone.

“Excuse you, but Spencer is a genius. He’s every girl’s favorite,” I remarked, and once again smiled when Spencer said something smart. “Besides, I can lust after whoever I want. I didn’t say anything when you fanboyed over Iron Man the last time.”

“It’s different,” Jungkook argued, and I giggled at his strange behavior. Having paused the video, I put the trey on the table and turned to look at him. “Besides, I’m way cooler than him, anyone would confirm that.”

“Yeah, right,” I snorted, shaking my head in disbelief. What was going on with him? Was he feeling insecure when compared to Spencer? Well… Spencer is a character, and Jungkook’s a real person, and I like him much more. “But seriously, you’re both great.”

“But I’m way more handsome,” Jungkook stubbornly claimed, and I agreed with him, knowing there was no point in arguing. Although it was a little arrogant of him, he was correct. Jungkook had his own charm, and it made him ridiculously attractive. “I was right,” Jungkook admitted, and I rolled my eyes at him, “although I have never caught you drooling over me, I’ve always known you liked me.”

“That’s not what I said,” I fought back, but Jungkook just smiled sheepishly, ignoring whatever I could say to defend my situation.

“Yeah, but you didn’t deny it,” Jungkook admitted smugly, and I smacked his thigh, urging him to stop embarrassing me. I came to watch something, not to get teased.

“Well… in that case,” I started, as I smiled at him and looked straight into his beautiful dark eyes. “You must like me too since you’re so curious about my feelings,” I said, and Jungkook looked away, a bit startled by my bold words. “Am I right, Jeon?”

“Maybe.”

***

After our conversation, we continued the marathon until it was four o’clock in the morning. Despite that we basically confessed to each other, nothing exciting happened; we carried on our marathon as if we didn’t just have that talk.

Not that I minded, though. I had no idea why it was possible, but it didn’t feel awkward at all.

Not even when we woke up in the afternoon cuddled on the couch. We probably should’ve discussed this unusual confession, but none of us felt like it. Nothing has changed, and everything seemed fine, so why should we change something that’s good?

The thing that we silently agreed on was giving each other some space. We didn’t part ways with an awkward hug or anything, but we didn’t reach one another throughout the rest of the week. And then, during another week, either, but I didn’t put that much thought to it. I was a pretty hectic week for me, and I suspected Jungkook to deal with similar problems.

Next Thursday, having done the groceries, I was on my way back home. It was past 9 o’clock, and I was tired after many hours of work, and right now, I couldn’t wait to reach the apartment, bake the damn pizza I had been craving the entire week, and doze off during another TV series.

When in front of the doors of my apartment, I put the grocery bag on the floor, as I sought for the keys in my bottomless purse. Quickly, I inserted the key and opened the doors only to shriek in disgust when I saw the scene occurring in front of my eyes.

Jimin was nailing Jiwoo on my fucking couch!

How could they? On my couch! That’s despicable! On my couch!

It was Thursday; she wasn’t supposed to be back until tomorrow! Fine, she was back, but couldn’t they have enough decency to Wam Bam Thank You Ma’am in his bedroom, or at least, give me a heads-up that they were going to defile my couch?

“What the fuck?” I hollered, as I closed my eyes, took a step backward, and slammed the doors shut. I saw them for 2 seconds tops, but Jimin still managed to flash his fucking dong in front of my innocent eyes.

Instantly, I grabbed the groceries and walked out of the apartment complex. The moment the fresh air hit my face, I pulled out my phone and dialed Jungkook’s number. Right now, he was the only one I could turn to, even after what happened the last time I saw him.

“Are you busy right now?” I asked Jungkook, not even bothering to greet him.

“Oh, hi. I’m fine. Thanks for asking,” Jungkook mused, and I rolled my eyes. “I’m waiting for Tae; we’re having a Marvel marathon tonight. Why? What happened?”

“Oh,” I hummed, “I’ll tell you when I get to you,” I stated before I hung up, not waiting for his approval. I had caught them humping on my couch – I was pissed, and I needed to distract myself. Needless to say, hanging out with Jungkook and Taehyung didn’t seem that bad.

They were great, it actually seemed dope.

Within fifteen minutes, I reached Jungkook’s apartment.

Quickly, Jungkook swung the doors open, and then I blurted, “I came back home only to catch Jiwoo getting boned on my fucking couch!”

“What?” Jungkook asked in confusion, but he took a step to the side, letting me in.

“I think I am traumatized right now,” I said lifelessly, as I sat on his couch, dropping my groceries by my feet. “You know what? This couch was very expensive, and they just… profaned it,” I spoke, not caring if Jungkook was listening to me. I just had to get it out of my system. “How could they? On my couch!”

Jungkook sat beside me, as I stared blankly at nothing in particular.

“I came back home after doing shopping, and then I caught them fornicating on my cute couch. And I’m pretty sure I made eye-contact with Jimin’s dick. The worst two seconds of my life. Jungkook, do you have bleach?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Jungkook reprimanded me, but I casually wrapped my arms around his neck, not even asking if he minded being my shoulder to cry on. Maybe I was being a bit overdramatic, but how was I going to face Jimin after seeing him in his birthday suit?

“Are you hungry?” I asked as soon as I pulled away, jumping on my feet. Usually, hard work kept me occupied, and right now, cooking seemed to be the only activity I could engage myself in. “I was going to bake pizza, I have all the needed ingredients,” I announced, picking up the grocery bag, moving toward his tiny kitchen.

“Do you need any help?” Jungkook offered, sitting by the kitchen island, watching me rummage around the kitchen.

“You can shred the cheese,” I told him, giving him one of the simplest tasks.

Jungkook turned on the radio, and we cooked in peace, talking about everything and nothing. He knew that I had to be kept busy, and he helped me. And I really appreciated it.

“When is Tae going to be here?” I inquired when I unpacked the groceries.

“Oh, he should’ve been here by now,” Jungkook said when he checked the time. “Wait a second,” he mused when he pulled out his phone. “That bitch ditched me!” Jungkook yelled, showing me their conversation in which Taehyung picked a hot Tinder date over Jungkook.

“What kind of friends do we have?” I asked rhetorically, but then I smiled at him. “Don’t be sad, though. If he’s not coming, it means there’s more food for us.” I said, reminding him that there’s always a blessing in disguise. “And my pizza is to die for!”

“Do you want a drink? I think we both need to get drunk,” Jungkook offered, and I nodded – he must’ve read my mind. If he didn’t want to hand me a bottle of bleach, then I’d have to resort to alcohol. “That fucker.”

Quickly, Jungkook poured us drinks, and although it was a bit too strong for my liking, I was going to drink it because the urge to erase Jimin’s dick from my memory was stronger than my common sense.

“So… is he big?” Jungkook asked me when he finished shredding the cheese. He was sitting on the opposite side of the table, supping his drink, staring at me knead the dough. Having sighed, I looked up at him, and flicked some flour on his face, hoping that he would shut his mouth. I wanted to erase that image, and talking about it wouldn’t make that picture to go away. “What? I wanna know.” Jungkook whined, and I shook my head, having no energy to comment on his statement.

Why do men need to know if they’re bigger or not? What does he need this validation for?

“Why don’t you focus on something useful… like turning on the oven, for example,” I said, and Jungkook listened to my command.

“So you’re not going to answer me, are you?” Jungkook asked me again as if he hoped I’d change my mind.

“Sorry to disappoint you, but I have nothing to compare it with,” I started, as I spread the sauce over the dough. “If you really wanna know, just flash me your dick, and I’ll tell you who’s bigger,” I added boldly, and Jungkook choked on his second drink, as he did not expect me to ask him to do that.

“On the second thought, I don’t wanna know,” he said, returning to his previous spot. “A simple no would work, by the way.”

“I’m not so sure it would,” I said confidently, as I put all the toppings. Now, we just had to wait for the oven to heat. “So what do you want to do? I need to do something to keep myself busy, so I could forget what I saw. I’m literally down with everything.”

“Everything you say?” Jungkook repeated after me, cocking up his eyebrow, probably thinking of something naughty. If I was right, I couldn’t blame him for any indecent thoughts of me. I would be a hypocrite because I had been thinking about him every night when I had been trying to fall asleep. And then, he had often haunted my dreams, too.

“What? What are you thinking about?” I inquired, though I had already a few possible answers to my question. Jungkook’s embarrassed smile could only mean one thing.

“Oh, I don’t think you wanna find out, baby,” he answered cockily, and I looked into his eyes, as I didn’t expect to hear that kind of reply. My boldness had successfully shied him away, and he was trying to intimidate me in the same way.

“What a shame,” I muttered, as I turned around to put the pizza into the oven. “As I said, I’m down with anything. So, what? Should we continue our marathon from where we left it last week?” I proposed innocently, but Jungkook didn’t seem excited about that option.

“You know what? Screw this,” Jungkook said before he approached me, turned me around, and forced his lips against mine. The kiss was rushed and sloppy, but it conveyed our frustration and urgency, and to me, it was perfect.

Almost instantly, he pushed his tongue into my mouth, and I let out a moan. His hands were holding my face, while mine quickly found purchase on his firm butt and pulled him against me. Unsynchronized, our lips moved together, desperately making up for the lost time that we had spent not kissing each other.

“Jungkook,” I moaned his name, and as if being urged, he hoisted me up and sat me down on the kitchen counter. With his lips tightly pressed against mine, he spread my legs and quickly slipped between them.

Although Jungkook barely touched me, I felt the flame kindle within me. Jungkook’s hands wandered down my sides until they reached my hips where he dug his fingers in. I loved it when he was feeling my body.

When I wanted to moan his name again, Jungkook bit on my bottom lip, stopping it from rolling off my tongue. Right now, he only cared about one thing, and it was me reciprocating his passionate kiss.

“I wanted to do that for quite a long time,” Jungkook confessed, as he pulled away. His eyes were shut close; his forehead was pressed against mine, while his hands dragged me over to the edge of the counter so I could feel his hardening cock.

“Me, too,” I admitted, as I wrapped my legs around his waist. “I won’t tell you how many times thoughts of you fucking me kept me awake at night,” I added, and Jungkook chuckled before he captured my lips again, already missing them.

“I’m hoping you thought of me every night,” Jungkook whispered against my mouth before he began to suck on my bottom lip, playfully pulling it. “I couldn’t fall asleep before I jerked off to you,” Jungkook confessed, and I giggled, as I imagined his veiny hand moving up and down his erection, his hips thrusting against his grip, the little hisses which left his mouth before he moaned my name.

“Do you want to go on a date with me?” I blurted out when Jungkook’s lips left my mouth, as he desperately wanted to mark my skin. Gently, Jungkook nipped my neck, as he wanted to imprint his feelings on my body. I didn’t mind hickeys, and I was sure that Jungkook wasn’t going to stop with one. No, he’s the type of a guy to mark me everywhere.

“Are you asking me out?” Jungkook inquired, and I purred when I felt his cold breath on the wet skin of my neck. “I should be the one doing that,” he concluded before he returned to his erotic ministrations; his teeth lightly scratched my skin, and his tongue licked the grazed area, and I probably enjoyed it more than I should. “Tomorrow, we’re going on a date.”

“You’re so hot when you’re so controlling,” I admitted honestly, and if Jungkook didn’t believe me, my wet panties could confirm that I indeed meant my words. “Which is strange because I hate being bossed around,” I added, and Jungkook grinned as he looked up, innocently pecking my lips.

“I wanna be inside of you already,” Jungkook whined, as he rubbed his erected cock against my sex, showing me how desperate he was to feel me. “I wanna feel how you squeeze around me; I wanna hear you scream my name when I make you come.”

“Jungkook, I…” and when I was about to tell him that I wanted him to take me on that kitchen counter, the oven started to ring, signalizing that the pizza was ready. As soon as we realized that the oven just cockblocked us, we began to laugh. “I think it’s a sign that we shouldn’t be doing that,” I said as I pushed him away and jumped off the counter, so I could take the pizza out of the oven before it would burn.

“I highly doubt that,” Jungkook answered as he sat down by the table, watching me bend over. “Your ass is amazing by the way,” he spoke in admiration, but I only rolled my eyes, even though I was flattered that he visually liked my butt.

“Thank you, but if you think that flattery with help you get into my pants, then you’re right,” I said playfully, as I put on mittens and placed the tin-ware on the stove. “But in your case, I think you could do all of the worst things to me, and I’d still let you fuck me, Jeon.”

“I’m honored to hear that you’re whipped for me,” Jungkook said casually, still observing my moves. “What kinky things would you let me do to you?”

“Probably all of them,” I said as I sat astride on his muscular thighs. “Wow, your muscles are no joke. Let me guess; you never skip the leg day, do you?” I asked him while playing with his hair as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

“I actually do sometimes, but usually it’s when you wanna hang out,” Jungkook admitted, as he grabbed my butt and pulled me closer, so his dick was pressed against my clothed entrance. I was feeling him through the fabric, and it felt absolutely erotic – if he would bury his cock inside of me, I’d probably squeeze around him immediately. “You’re the sole reason why I slack off sometimes.”

“I’m sorry, I had no idea I’m such a bad influence,” I whispered into his ear, rubbing my sex against his throbbing cock. “So… are you hungry? The pizza tastes the best when it’s right out of the oven,” I said, mentioning the food, but Jungkook ignored my proposition, as he was dead set on devouring me.

“It looks and smells delicious, but I fancy something else,” Jungkook stated, and I leaned forward to peck his swollen lips to shut him up. He didn’t want to eat me out, did he? I didn’t mind, I knew what his tongue could do, but more than anything, I was desperate to feel his cock fill me. “I’m so hard, baby,” Jungkook hissed, as he cupped his dick.

“Do you want me to suck you off?” I asked sounding unfittingly innocent what really threw him off for a while. Slowly, I slid off his thighs, waiting for him to stop me if he didn’t want to. Just as I expected, Jungkook didn’t protest, he only admired me when I got on my knees between his legs. “It’s my first time, so don’t expect a pro,” I warned him when I cupped his crotch through the material of his jeans. The moment my hand gently squeezed his erection, Jungkook let out a hushed moan of pleasure.

“That’s right, baby. Touch me,” Jungkook breathed out, and I obediently undid the button of his jeans and pulled the zipper down. Biting my lips, I grabbed the hem of his trousers and yanked them down to his calves.

Apparently, Jungkook’s a boxers kind of guy. His budge was impressive, and I couldn’t wait until I’d see what’s hidden under the material. Having licked my lips, I leaned forward to press my lips against his clothed erection. Jiwoo had told me a few months ago that guys liked a little bit of teasing, and it appears that, Jungkook likes it, too.

“You know how to tease me very well for someone who has never done it,” Jungkook nonchalantly commented, but I just shrugged. I wanted to taste him, and I didn’t want to engage in useless conversation with him.

“You will change your mind when I graze your dick with my teeth,” I said jokingly, but Jungkook panicked even if it was for about a second.

“I think I like you too much to get seriously mad at you,” Jungkook admitted, and I smiled shyly, hoping not to blush at his strange confession. With my eyes trained on his erection, I freed his cock out of the boxers, giving it a few delicate strokes. “Oh, your hands are so cold,” Jungkook hissed, kicking his head backward.

“Hints are very much appreciated,” I added, reminding him it was my first time stroking and blowing a man, so if he had any pointers for me, I’d gladly use them.

“You can squeeze your hand a bit tighter, I barely feel your touch, and it drives me insane,” Jungkook instructed me, and I followed his tips, making him bite his bottom lip, as he tried to remain cool. “You can spit on it, you know,” he added, but I ignored him this time, deciding to lick his cock from its base all up to its tip instead.

“Shit,” Jungkook cursed, shutting his eyes close. “Just put it in your mouth already,” Jungkook urged, and I wrapped my mouth around the tip of his cock just as he demanded. “Oh, yeah, just like that,” Jungkook panted out, enjoying the way I ran my tongue around the tip while simultaneously squeezing his balls.

“I’m so turned out right now,” I moaned, feeling excitement flare up inside of me. “I’m so wet for your thick cock,” I added before I once again put his cock into my mouth, this time taking more of him. His response was immediate; although he was trying to stay still because of my lack of experience, he couldn’t stop himself from buckling his hips up, desperate to fuck my throat.

“OK, that’s enough,” Jungkook whispered, as I probably did something wrong. Well…, if anything, it was his fault – he was thrusting into my mouth when I was evidently not prepared for it. “It’s my turn to take care of you; don’t you think?” He added as he offered me his hand to help me stand up.

“You want to eat me out?”

“Damn straight I do,” Jungkook answered quickly, as he jumped up to his feet in front of me and threw me over his shoulder. “You remember that drinking game we played? I’m gonna prove to you how mind-blowing head I give,” he added and spanked my butt playfully.

“If I knew that my choice would hurt your ego so much, I’d just point at Hoseok,” I answered, trying to refrain myself from giggling. The situation was ridiculous; Jungkook was trying to prove me wrong, although I had no doubts in his skills.

Quickly, Jungkook stepped out of his boxers, leaving them behind on the kitchen floor as he carried me to his bedroom.

“To be completely honest, I thought of eating you out ever since,” Jungkook admitted as he placed me on his bed carefully. “How you would moan my name, how you would arch your back and buckle into my face,” he continued, and I hid my face behind my hands too embarrassed to look at him. “Is it too much?”

Hesitantly, I lowered my hands to look at him; Jungkook was sitting on the other side of the bed, staring at me. He looked incredibly nervous, and I couldn’t believe it was me who made him stressed like that. It was just me; he didn’t have to worry about what I was thinking.

“What are you talking about? It’s nothing compared to what I was thinking,” I stated confidently, trying to ease the tension between us. “Maybe I wasn’t pining for you as long as you were for me, but my thoughts are way kinkier. You don’t have to be embarrassed in front of me,” I explained, and with that, Jungkook surged forward, getting on top of me, kissing my breath away.

“You’re too great to be real,” he whispered when he pulled away for a second. Before I managed to reply, his lips returned to my mouth, while his hands started to once again roam around my body. Jungkook completely dominated the kiss, and I moaned into his mouth when he squeezed my breast and rubbed his erection against me.

“Just fuck me, Jeon. I don’t care if it’s your cock, tongue or fingers. I just have to feel you, please,” I urged me, as grinding my sex against him wasn’t the best sign of what I wanted him to do. Kissing him was beyond amazing, but my pussy was throbbing for his attention.

“I just love how needy you are,” Jungkook whispered as he kissed my neck, undoing my trousers, pushing his hand under the hem of my panties. “And your pussy is drenched,” he stated matter-of-factly, as he began to rub my juices across my clit.

“Yes,” I breathed out, pushing my hips upwards, wanting him to apply more force. “Oh my God, Jungkook, please, more,” I moaned, hoping that my desperate cries for pleasure would make him stop teasing me.

“Undress,” Jungkook ordered, and I quickly grabbed the hem of my shirt and pulled it over my head, while Jungkook yanked my jeans and panties down my legs, tossing them on the floor. “You look even better than I imagined,” Jungkook admitted before he leaned forward, placing delicate kisses on my stomach, down to my sex.

Firmly, his large hand held my hips in one place. With one last look at me, Jungkook dived in, shaking my world upside down with his tongue. All of his attention was focused on my clit, he massaged it, tugged it and swirled his tongue around it.

Though it was my first time when a guy went down on me, I could tell that Jungkook was amazing; I enjoyed it more than all of my past intimate endeavors. Unlike all the other men I had been with, Jungkook wasn’t only a taker. He gave so much from himself, while at the same time; he wasn’t trying to force me into returning the pleasure. He was perfect.

“You’re so hot,” Jungkook praised me before he started to fuck me with his tongue; it was so nice, I thought I could easily come on his mouth. “I could bet that I could make you come with my fingers,” he added smugly, as he inserted his middle finger inside my pussy.

“I’m not going to bet when I know I’m gonna lose,” I replied genuinely, as I had no intention to boost his ego even more. My desperate moans already stroked it a bit too much.

“Shame,” Jungkook spoke before he started to suck on my clit while curling his fingers inside of me, as he tried to make me come around his fingers.

“You’ve proven your point, Jeon. You’re amazing at giving head,” I said, as I gripped the sheets when Jungkook’s fingers found my sweet spot. “But I really want to come around your cock. Jungkook, please, I want to feel your cock inside of me.”

“Is it weird that it turns me on when you call me Jeon?” Jungkook asked as he pulled out, once again getting on top of me, placing his chin between my breasts.

“No, it’s not, Jeon,” I answered, watching his reaction when I called him by his surname. He didn’t lie, he evidently enjoyed it. “Is it weird that I want you to fill my pussy with cum and then make me come with your fingers with your cum inside of me?”

“A bit,” Jungkook admitted, and I giggled along with him. “But shit, now when you said it, I want to do that,” he added, and I smirked, glad that he didn’t find my fantasy too weird for him. “So… how do you want me to fuck your pussy?”

“I was wondering if I could ride your dick.”

“Baby, this seat is yours,” Jungkook said, as he lay beside me, letting me climb on top of him.

“Take off your shit, I wanna see these abs you’ve been working on,” I commanded, and Jungkook complied, showing off his beautiful muscles. Admiring the view in front of me, I reached behind my back to unhook my bra, releasing my breast.

“Do you like it?” He asked, but instead of answering him, I just grind my pussy against his throbbing cock. “You love it,” he concluded, tensing his muscles, so when I touched them, they were hard as rocks.

“I do, but I’d still like you if you weren’t ripped,” I admitted before I managed to bite my tongue. We had confessed to each other before, but it had never been that direct.

“And I’d still like you if you were just as ripped as I am,” Jungkook jested, and I rubbed him harder, excited to finally feel him inside of me. “Ride me.”

Slowly, I grabbed his cock and aligned it with my entrance, carefully sinking down onto it. He was thick, and despite being incredibly wet, I still was tight for his cock.

“Oh my God,” Jungkook moaned when my walls stretched around his length. “It feels so good,” he added, as he gently moved his hips, and I moaned, loving the feeling of him inside of me. It felt like heaven.”You’re so warm.”

At first, I rocked my hips slowly, but gradually I increased the pace. His cock was filling me so good, and whenever I sank down on it, I let a loud moan.

“Yes, baby,” Jungkook hissed, as he sat up. With his fingers digging into my flesh, he helped me reach the tempo which satisfied us both. “You’re so hot,” he added again, as he pressed his lips against my skin between my breasts. “You will make me come ridiculously fast,” Jungkook said, and I giggled in between desperate gasps for air.

My stamina was nonexistent when compared to Jungkook’s.

“Oh my God, yes!” I screamed when Jungkook hand rubbed my clit. “Fuck,” I panted, picking my pace, riding him using the last bits of my energy. My walls started to hiss around Jungkook’s throbbing cock, and judging by a multitude of hushed breaths which left his mouth, Jungkook was close too.

“Please, don’t stop,” Jungkook begged, as he began to thrust from underneath me. He was desperate to reach his orgasm, and I couldn’t wait to hear him shout my name when he’d release his load inside of me. “I’m coming, I’m coming, shit,” Jungkook loudly whined as he came, milking my walls with his sticky cum.

“Please, don’t stop!” I shouted as I continued to chase my release. “Fuck, Jungkook, I feel so good,” I said before the wave of pleasure surged through me, making me scream his name and arch my back. It was by far the best orgasm of my life.

“It was amazing,” Jungkook said as he kissed my temple, watching me descend slowly on the ground after the blissful peak. “You are amazing,” he added, but I only wrapped my arms around him, hiding my face in the crook of his neck.

“We have to keep doing that,” I commented, feeling incredibly euphoric. “I had no idea that sex could be this good,” I added while absentmindedly caressing his sweaty chest.

“I had no idea I’m this good,” Jungkook teased, and I lightly hit him. He was getting too smug for his own good. “So, you wanted another round, is that right?” Jungkook asked as he pulled out his cock, letting his jizz slowly leak out of my pussy. “It’s a lot of cum.”

“I know what I said, and I’m still turned on when I think about it, but now, I can only think about a hot shower,” I explained, even though I suspected Jungkook to be disappointed with me changing my mind so quickly. “Are you mad?”

“Are you kidding me?” Jungkook asked me as he propped on his elbow to be able to look at me properly. “I could never be mad at you.” He stated, pecking my forehead. “We’ll have a quick shower, and then, we’ll eat your pizza.”

“I like that plan.”

“I am not finished,” he said, making me curious about his plans. “Tomorrow, before our date I’m giving you two orgasms,” Jungkook proposed, and I eagerly nodded my head. “And another two orgasms after our date.”

“That’s crazy.”

“No, it would be crazy if I wanted to make you come during the date.”

“You’re crazy,” I corrected myself, trying my best not to giggle.

“Maybe a little bit.”

[tessatechaitea]

Justice Society of America #8

Oh no! Hate! It must be stopped!

That caption sounded sarcastic, didn't it? It sort of sounds like a centrist arguing against somebody saying something that nobody should be on the other side of. "Of course Black Lives Matter! Nobody is saying they don't! Why even bother bringing it up?! You're just causing trouble!" is the kind of thing that has made me hate people who identify as "non-political" or "centrist" or "libertarian" or "Proud Husband. Father. Christian." Nobody needs to hear from you if the only thing you have to say is that nobody needs to be fighting for the things they need to be fighting for! "If it's already a crime, why do we need more stringent laws for punishing crimes motivated by hate. Aren't all criminal acts hateful?" says the person ignoring reality for their own selfish interests of which I can't even begin to guess. Enough about people who have chosen to be non-people. Let's discuss a comic book from 1993 that probably takes a stronger stance against fascism than a frightening large number of Americans today.

This advert on the inside front cover would be better if the picture over "very rare" was a cow. I mean, it wouldn't work for baseball cards but I would like it better.

I think the best part about actually living in a world where superheroes are real is that day in 5th Grade when Hawkman and Hawkwoman visit your class to talk about Egyptian archaeology. The issue begins by catching up with Hawkman and Hawkwoman as they continue their quest to steal Egyptian cultural artifacts. You have to give them a pass on this though! In 1993, people just believed archaeology was a thrilling way to bring treasures into museums for everybody to share! It's not like we had hundreds of years to reflect on how terrible this practice was. You have to do some cultural math by subtracting the number of years Western culture believed whatever it did was right and just from, I don't, negative 100? Do you think we'll have learned some humbleness and respect in one hundred years? Most kids who grew up in the 70s wanted to be boring ass truck drivers but by the 80s, thanks to Indiana Jones, they wanted to be boring ass archaeologists. Kids aren't the greatest at determining what a fun adult job might be. Did you know there are people who get angry at the supposition that digging up and taking cultural artifacts and treasures from other countries to bring back to your own might be theft? Generally they're the same type of people who believe that all advances to civilization were brought about by white culture. They hold this opinion through absolutely no evidence at all. How do I know they don't have any evidence? Because if they looked for evidence, they'd wind up reading history and realize their claim was too ludicrous to continue defending.

You might think Hawkgirl is commenting on the gigantic sarcophagus the native archaeologists are opening but I know she's making an innuendo about Hawkman's cock because she's doing that thing with her hat where she lifts it up and down and waggles her eyebrows.

It's not really much of a joke though because nobody expects Hawkman's penis to be as large as a fifty foot long sarcophagus. I mean, I'm sure it's big but it's not going to be unwieldy! It's probably almost exactly the same size and shape as his mace. Interlude: here are some Facebook posts I made on several different July 26thes because I guess I think of it as a holiday to entertain my future self every July 26th? Whatever the case, I love Past Me more than Future Me and possibly even more than Present Me. Because of the Hays Code, Alfred Fatcock had to change his name to keep making films. How patriotic would you consider a person who got a flag pregnant? War Games is my favorite movie because it taught me that trying is pointless. The first item on my bucket list is to buy a bucket. End of Interlude. Can you tell I'm stalling because maybe eight issues of this comic book was too much? Here's an adult riddle: What's twenty-five feet long, wrapped in bandages, and has an eye in the middle of its head?

This guy's penis!

I don't recognize the guy with three eyes but I'm sure he's some immortal wizard named Amn Thoth or something. While the Carters discover ancient mummy curses, Johnny Quick tries to convince Rex that his hour of strength doesn't come from a drug at all but deep inside him. He doesn't need to pop pills to be a superhero; he just needs to balance his chakras and figure out his mantra. Then he'll tap into some deep spiritual part of himself that is probably just a meta(l)gene and whammo! Hourman is back and straight edge! But Rex doesn't buy it. Especially since learning his mantra isn't going to cure his son's cancer (which he got from taking Miraclo). Also in the hospital is Wesley Dodd who is doing therapy to recover from his stroke. Plus his friend Bishop Tumutuu who was some guy who fought against Apartheid. And because the Bishop is in the hospital, the white supremacists are gathering outside to not wish him well.

Shouldn't they hear what they have to say and debate them to better strengthen their own side of the argument on why all people should have equal opportunity with all rights and freedoms promised by this country?

I'm absolutely for freedom of all speech. But the problem that the American media and a lot of people on the Internet have fallen into is the idea that all speech needs to be discussed and debated equally. That's the whole "freedom of speech" trap. Whenever somebody on Twitter wants to debate some terrible topic that nearly all kind and forward thinking people realize is a monstrous and terrible idea and you simply mock them for their terrible beliefs or tell them to shut up, they think you're clamping down on their free speech. No, sir. You were able to say the stupid thing you wanted to say. What you actually want is for a Constitutional Amendment that forces me tor respect what you said and debate it as if the matter has yet to be resolved. The media does this all the time by allowing both sides of an opinion to debate which only legitimizes the side with the terrible take. Sure, we should allow racists to go on CNN and declare their stance on race relations. But the people on the other side shouldn't be debating that topic with them. They should just laugh at them and point and tell them how terrible they are. Maybe get some of that slime from You Can't Do That on Television for rebuttals. Freedom of speech needs way more mockery and far less debate if it's going to recover. Hourman responds to the white supremacists with a "None of my business!" because he's a terrible centrist who believes that if the status quo isn't making his life rough, why rock the boat? Also his son is dying of cancer so maybe he's a bit distracted. I shouldn't be so hard on him when he's wracked with the guilt of probably killing his son with his drugs. The white supremacists begin making trouble so it's time for the JSA to put an end to hate! Or will hate win out? I mean, this comic book was written in 1993 and I don't feel like hate has backed down.

Sure, he's against metahumans now. But just wait until one of them decides to wear on of those stupid hats and silly robes!

Watching the speedsters begin to get pummeled by the huge mass of white supremacists, Hourman accidentally balances his chakras! He's suddenly powerful without the drugs or the black lights or the Doctor Fate deep muscle massages! Now if he can convince his son that the power of Miraclo has been inside him all along, his son will have the strength to battle the cancer! Why did I use an exclamation point on that previous sentence when I don't really fucking care about Rex Tyler and his son! Hourman crashes out of the hospital window to save Johnny Quick. He lets Jesse do her own thing because he's heard about women's lib and also she's not an old man whose powers have significantly dwindled over time.

My adrenal gland just got bigger too!

In the end, the Bishop is saved and even Wesley Dodd joins the fight! Or he just absentmindedly shot off his sandman gun and coincidentally put the Bishop's assassin to sleep. It's hard to tell since he's still suffering from his retirement party stroke. The issue ends with Green Lantern surfing the television when he comes upon Carter Hall's interview program where he's interviewing the mummy they dug up, a man named Edmund Kulak. Since Green Lantern recognizes him, I guess he's one of the JSA's foes. According to the Who's Who, Kulak can use his third eye to cause everybody on Earth to hate each other. I guess that's why the white supremacists were acting up (and also wearing eyes on their hats and robes). Having a magical reason for racism is always a better comic book story than acknowledging a lot of people are racist of their own free will. Imagine all the angry letters that the pre-Comicsgate generation would have had to write in! "I'm not racist but I don't think you should portray all white people as racist because that is racist! Logic for the win!" That might seem like I created a 1993 Strawman but have you read the letters reacting to the Tales of the Teen Titans Spotlight on Starfire about Apartheid? My pretend letter was practically verbatim of one or two of the letters Mike Gold had to respond to on that series! Justice Society of America #8 Rating: B-. I think I've read enough old stories about old people fighting immortals. The whole mortality angle is really bringing me down!

[lilnasxvevo]

A few months ago I watched The Great Lie (1951) and it’s not a great movie but if you want to see Bette Davis playing someone who’s actually a nice person just out of curiosity it’s great for that. But the reason I’m bringing it up is because I want to compare it to a movie I just watched.

A lot of old movies have plots that seem pretty bonkers or just plain dumb to modern audiences. This one has a pregnancy plot. But because it’s 1951 and the Hayes Code is a thing:

there’s a weird thing where a man impulsively marries a woman because he thinks his divorce papers from his last marriage have finally gone through and he throws a party and things get a little crazy so much like the Bruno Mars song they just kinda get married and they have a night together as man and wife, but then the next morning he finds out his divorce papers didn’t actually go through which is great because these two found out in the light of day that they don’t want to be married to each other;

this bullshittery is very important because due to plot reasons they need this woman to be pregnant with this man’s baby without being married to him and this was the least scandalous way they could think of to do it;

that guy marries his childhood sweetheart who is bette davis and i don’t remember why she isn’t the woman he married the first time;

that guy goes off to war as a fighter pilot and his plane goes down over the amazon and he’s missing presumed dead;

bette davis is devastated and for some reason instinctively Knows that this other woman is pregnant with his child and goes and chases her down and asks her to have the child when it’s born;

BUT HERE’S THE THING. THE MOVIE DOESN’T USE THE WORD “PREGNANT” ONCE. BECAUSE THE HAYS CODE DIDN’T LIKE THAT WORD.

THEY ALSO NEVER SHOW HER PREGNANT BELLY EVEN ONCE. Once she gets further along in the pregnancy she is always either swathed in enormous robes and such or she is in bed under blankets or something similar. The audience MUST be protected from knowing what pregnancy looks like.

Once she gives birth we are not allowed to see or hear any part of the labor and while that’s going on the camera cuts away and shows us Bette Davis for a while;

and then Bette Davis takes the baby and both women don’t tell anyone that it isn’t actually Bette Davis’ biological child.

The rest of the plot is not necessary, but I need to impress upon you that this is a movie that literally revolved around a pregnancy and yet the filmmakers were not really allowed to call it a pregnancy or to really show the pregnancy. They WERE allowed to communicate that the baby is inside that woman’s body and what she eats and drinks affects the baby, so that’s good.

TEN years later, 1961, sees the movie People Will Talk.

I have no fucking clue how this movie got so much through the censors. I watched it on TCM and obviously they always have smart people talking about the movies before and after and in the after segment they had literally the director’s daughter and nephew talking and even they had no idea how he got all this through the censors.

Here is what this movie got to do, an entire year before Lucille Ball became the first visibly pregnant person on TV but still wasn’t allowed to say the word “pregnant” on the show:

The main character is a gynecologist. The word “gynecologist” is used.

He meets a young lady who is pregnant and unmarried. The word “pregnant” is used and they very explicitly state that she barely knew the man who is the father of the baby. Her plight is treated with sympathy.

Here’s a line I loved too much not to share: Behind this young woman’s back a nurse comments, “Well, she’s old enough to know what’s coming to her,” and the gynecologist guy rounds on her and says “I never want to hear you say anything that idiotic or heartless ever again! You should know better both as a nurse and as a woman, and I’m ashamed of both of you!” (it’s a joke she’s only one person geddit)

The gynecologist recommends that she get a regular obstetrician. The word “obstetrician” is used.

The woman tries to kill herself but only manages to graze herself with the bullet. She is hospitalized but she’s in pretty good shape, she’s not that hurt. It is important to note at the time that suicide was considered a sin. Oftentimes in movies of the era, a particularly sinful character had to die in order to satisfy the censors. (This is why any movies with explicitly gay characters from this period usually end tragically. It was a concession they had to make in order to get the movie out there.)

The woman recovers. She and the gynecologist fall in love, and the gynecologist is a kind and intelligent man played by Cary Grant, so he’s a real catch. They get married. They have a discussion about her pregnancy and the Cary Grant character is adamant that the biological father of the child doesn’t matter because when the child is born it is going to be their child because they’re going to be the ones who raise the child and love them and keep them warm and safe. And also they’re going to make more biological babies after this one...obviously.

THE WOMAN LIVES HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!! SHE DOES! THERE’S NO CATCH! She did so much ~sinning~ and the movie says it doesn’t matter and she gets to be happy forever!

And also??? The movie is a very obvious commentary on McCarthyism. There’s a whole other plotline where the Cary Grant character is brought before a panel of his peers because of a bunch of variously of trumped-up and dishonest and half-baked charges and they demand that he explain himself to their satisfaction. A big thing they drill him about is his close association with a man they consider to be unsavory and suspicious.

The Hays Code didn’t officially ease off on its prohibitions on showing pregnancy until 1968 when there was a weird specific incident I won’t go into here.

[fuckyeah-nerdery]

I was tagged in a question thing by that knave, @spyderking83.

01. name  Jason

02. nicknames  Jay, I guess. I used to be called “Stick Boy” when I was a kid because of how thin I was, and my brother still calls me “JKL;”.

03. zodiac Ted Cruz

04. height 6’1 or 6’2. Really depends on which liquor store I’m robbing at the time.

05. orientation Grey Ace, maybe? I’m fairly sure I am, but I still want to do more research before declaring myself.

06. ethnicity The one that’s basically easy mode with cheat codes, aka white.

07. favorite fruit Cantaloupe or melon of the water.

08. favorite season Any of the three that isn’t the devil’s season, aka Summer. Fuck Summer and it’s ball sweat heat.

09. favorite book series Vorkosigan Saga for sci-fi, Heralds of Valdemar and maybe Dresden Files for fantasy, and Inspector Rebus for mystery/crime. I don’t have rock solid favorites, really, but these are the ones I typically enjoy reading.

10. favorite flower Which rose was it for House Lancaster?

11. favorite scent Anything that smells nice and isn’t overpowering.

12. favorite color Shades of blue.

13. coffee tea or cocoa Cocoa. Coffee makes me piss like a racehorse. Running to the bathroom several times in a short period of time is no fun.

14. average sleep hours I typically get ready for bed around 11:30 at night and it’s close to midnight by the time I hit the hay. I usually wake up around seven or so because of my doggo.

15. cat or dog person Dog. We’ve only had cats once, when we still lived back in the boonies when I was a kid. We had to leave them behind when we moved because it was hard enough to get permission from the new landlord to bring our dog. Our former landlords promised to look after them, but it was a moot point because both cats - Tigger and Socks - were wildly independent. I wouldn’t say that they were even semi-feral because they hung around the house, but spent a lot of their time in the woods. I figured that they took care of themselves and lived nice long lives.

16. favorite fictional characters Most Star Trek characters, too many to name. Miles Vorkosigan and Cordelia Naismith, among others.

17. dream trip  Visit the homes of all the sci-fi and fantasy writing greats. Riverside, Iowa too.

18. blog created 2010.

19. number of followers 7300. A small few are bots, but most are those people who only follow people to get a follow back. Boy howdy, are they ever barking up the wrong tree. Then you have the mutuals, which are so few in number that I doubt you could crew an Archer-class starship with them.

So now I have to tag ten people, so here goes: @nicejewishgirl, @pirate-autobot, @omnificoctopus, @rtahuniverse, @starklord-dude-of-the-north, @ragingfembabe, @godzillaslipstick, @armoured-escort, @breakfastwiththesun, @nerdwithabrush