#Dazai for menace reference
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triplethewinds · 1 year ago
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posting Q before Kouyou feels like a crime but they’re up there in my favs so
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ukumiii · 1 year ago
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skkitties
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osamucide · 2 months ago
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⊹ FOR SURE
RELATIVELY STABLE AND TENTATIVELY ABLE TO SAY FOR CERTAIN WHETHER THIS UNCERTAINTY IS FOR SURE
wc: 2k
cw: sad and probably ooc dazai but he’s my husband so i actually know how he falls apart, pretty straightforward references to anxiety+dissociation, references to self harm+suicidal ideation but nothing graphic, angst+hurt/comfort, dazai cries and then you feed him that's all
reid: a little spur of the moment something i started when i wasn’t feeling so hot a bit ago. ethel cain’s cover of this song has altered the course of my life anyway enjoy me projecting
⊹ ⊹ ⊹
He was quiet when he got home, which is uncharacteristic, unless he’s scheming. But there was no glint in his eyes and no menace behind his grin, only exhaustion. What’s more is there was no downcast expression, no particularly sluggish movement to suggest he was upset; granted, he would regularly go on performing his usual persona even if he was upset. He was always all moving puzzle pieces, all thick mask and mystery.
It’s a good thing you’ve learned to read him so plainly.
You owe it to the little shared space you’re in, wrapped in a blanket on the couch, reading a book of his as he shakes his coat off and tosses it across the small dining table with two chairs side-by-side at it instead of across from one another. Dazai usually hangs his coat up on the rack by the door, slips his shoes off mindlessly and comes to flop his entire body weight on top of you, but tonight he pulls his laces undone and leaves his shoes tucked neatly against the wall, walks by the back of the couch to press a ghostly kiss to the crown of your head, and heads straight to the bathroom, which he locks himself in.
You swallow as you hear the shower start. You had specifically picked out an apartment with a standing shower, no tub, when you moved in with him. You’d emptied it of razors a handful of times and you probably would a handful of times more, and you kept all of both of your medication in your bedside table. Still, you can no longer quite focus on the words in front of you.
So, you flick the television on. A little more noise in your brain helps tune out the shower that’s just that—a shower. He showers, most often, because he’s feeling strange and not because he needs to feel clean. Maybe he needs to feel clean, but not in a way that a shower will allow. He does it anyway. You wait.
When the water turns off and he doesn’t immediately bounce out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist, singsonging which leftovers you should heat up for him, you turn the TV volume down a few notches. When it’s been five minutes or so, you find yourself in the kitchen putting day-old bibimbap in the microwave. When it’s been ten, you’re knocking on the door.
"Osamu?" Your voice is soft as your knock. "I waited for you to eat." Dirty trick, you know. But you also know he won’t otherwise; not on a night like this.
You hear a bit of shuffling before the bathroom door creaks open. His eyes are red, his nose flushed, and he’s rubbing his face with the corner of his towel like he’s just awoken from a nap. He’s got no bandages on. He nearly whispers, "You didn’t have to."
"Wanted to." You work the towel from his hands as he turns the light off. He’ll hide behind the darkness if nothing else, but it’s alright; you’ll let him. You pat water from his shoulders before you sling the towel around him like a cape. You whisper back, "I’ll get you clothes. Please get silverware, yes?"
You don’t give him much of a choice, but he’s in a state where he’s pliant enough to listen to corporeal orders. Getting silverware will be a marginally easier task than dressing for him right now.
After pulling a sweatshirt and pair of pajama pants out of your drawers—they’re his, or maybe yours, doesn’t really matter; what does matter is they cover as much skin as possible—you return to him on the couch, two bowls of cooling bibimbap with chopsticks stuck in them on coffee table. He’s got as much of his bare body under the towel as it will allow.
When you set next to him and peel the towel back he looks nearly catatonic. It spurs tears to your lash line, but you hold back. "Arms, please."
He shoves himself into the hoodie, tousling his wet mop of hair in the process, and takes the pants from you, which he stands robotically to step into. When he sits you wrap five fingers across the top of his flannel-clad thigh and press a short kiss to his cheek.
As if sparked by your touch, he curls himself into you.
You’re quick to receive him; you unlock his hands from where they latch behind your neck, gently, like everything else, and you lean back, back, until your head is hitting the pillow you were lounged up against earlier. His fingers scramble for somewhere to land; you will his weight down onto you, his shoulder and hip to tuck beside yours on the inside of the couch, his free arm and leg to sling across your body and his sweet face in the side of your neck. The water from his hair soaks through your shirt. You don’t care. You feel his breath; your fingertips trace circles along his spine, and your outside hand comes to tangle up with his. Eating will have to wait.
You don’t waste time asking if he wants to talk. If he did, he would’ve started by now.
So you focus on his breathing, and how lucky you are to have it ghosting along your collarbone. He’s gray, then white, then gray, then blue in the light of the TV as his thumb moves across the back of your hand, stiff, like it’s just been freed from paralysis.
You wait for his breath to shake; you know it will.
And he knows you know, because he squeezes your hand in a pulsing rhythm like a heartbeat. He hates this. He hates that you've seen him crumble so many times that you know exactly what he needs.
You say it so softly, again, almost a whisper: "I've got you, my love."
He doesn't want you to say it's okay or let it out or talk to me; this is another thing you know very well. He feels like he's floating away from what little sense of self he has to begin with and it's not okay, and he doesn't want to talk about it, he doesn't want to be told when to cry or not, but he does need reminded that you're here, and you're real, and so is he, and so is this thing that both have; you'll grab his ankles and pull him down out of the air. You always do. You always do.
So he cries anyway.
It's like hearing a foreign language leave his mouth. There's something so assured about Dazai even while he believes he's all smoke and mirrors and seeing—hearing—his voice jump between heaving breaths and cracking sobs has always jarred you in some way. Moreover, now that you're so attuned to the way he breaks, it fills you with a tired anger that you can't place on anything concrete. It's a frustration you're glad to shoulder with him, but a frustration no less. You would set fire to everything you could touch, strangle it all to death with your bare hands, if it guaranteed his peace. But you know he wouldn't want that, not anymore; you quell the rage inside you between strands of his hair, fingerpads combing over his scalp with all that anger channeled into love, pure love. For as terrible and rotten as he's convinced he is, he's truly turned you into something softer than you thought yourself capable of being.
You feel his heart racing double-time against yours; you briefly wish you had no chest, no ribs, no physical form to separate you from him, so that your heart could cradle his, give over to his troubled body the time of the breath yours breathes.
He's all jagged edges right now and you're holding him like he's made of cotton. It makes him worse, momentarily, and he tears his hand away from yours; he knows wrapping around you like this, like a boa constrictor around its prey, will make his arms lose feeling but he does it anyway, like he's worried you'll go up in a cloud of dust if he doesn't hold onto you tight enough. He knows it's probably uncomfortable for you, too, laying back on his knotted fingers while he shoves every piece of himself as close as he can get to you, but you don't say anything, don't even make a sound when he hyperventilates into your shoulder and pushes out pathetic whimpers between his stuttering. He knows his face is twisted into that expression he long ago deemed too ugly to look at in the mirror. He gasps like he's underwater, and you just press your cheek to his temple while you lose track of if the wetness on your shoulder is from his hair or his eyes. It doesn't matter. You love him so fucking much.
He weeps against you with his constraint surrendered, loud but muffled by your shirt, at least until whatever movie was on is over. When he finally lifts his head, your eyes flutter open. You hadn't realized you closed them.
You tilt to look at him; the seam of your shirt collar is imprinted into his cheek. His bangs have dried wildly; you push them away from his eyes which are raw with sorrow, and Dazai's hands unclasp from behind you, settling back to how they first were with one curled up into the couch and the other interlaced with yours. He's devastatingly beautiful. You can't help the ghost of the sad smile you wear; it's because he's so gorgeous, and also you want to let him know you're content to be here—not content with what's upset him, not at all, but content to pick him up and help him haul himself forward. He does not reflect the smile back to you. You don't blame him.
"Let's eat." You leave the please unspoken, but it hangs there anyway.
"It's cold," he complains, still distant, but with a glimmer of a pout you think may be him. He's not getting out of it, though.
You sit him up, keep him close to your side and pick up a bowl; it's indeed cold, but you take a bite anyway, as if to show him it's not so bad. When you hold sliced carrot and broccoli to his lips, he looks at you like you're trying to feed him dirt, but opens his mouth anyway.
And it may as well be medicine going down. Not that he particularly cares for reheated and recooled leftover bibimbap, but your fingers being at the other end of the chopsticks makes it appealing. More than appealing. Delightful, even. He never really understood how things like food, music, or art could be healing until he met you and you doodles silly pictures of him on slow Sunday mornings, sang old love songs to him while you shooed him away from the stove as you cooked dinner, fed him leftovers in your shared home, on your shared couch, surrounded by all the things that were both yours and his, sweatshirts, books, blankets, chopsticks alike.
And he tells you that in his own way.
"Heat it up again for me? Please?"
He speaks the plea this time, and you grin—not sad this time, but wholly, as he relights slowly in front of you. And as already established, you'd do anything for him.
"Mhm."
"I love you," he blurts. Tags it on. You stand, gathering both bowls, still grinning.
"I love you." No question about any of it. You press a kiss to the crown of his head. He unfurls the blanket from where you'd slung it over the back of the couch earlier, picking up the remote to flick through the channels, finally breathing steadily as he waits for you to return from the kitchen. Your kitchen, his kitchen. He hears the microwave hum, in another room, not on another planet. He knows he'll be alright.
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astro-pioneer · 2 years ago
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chapstick!
your chapstick is too good to not share with him. 『chuuya, dazai, ranpo, honourable mentions』
chuuya!
didn't even realize it was yours at first
just saw it on the counter and went 'yoink you're mine now'
he thought it was one of his that he forgot he had tbh
it smelled and tasted similar but couldn't recall
your text to him made him realize he was very wrong
"I didn't know it was yours! I just saw it and realized I needed some so I took it." This is embarrassing; all of his subordinates were watching him 'argue' on the phone. "Yes, I understand it was hard to find. I promise I'll find a new one!" His sigh was full of defeat. Some of his men felt a little bad, having experienced the wrath of a significant other. He was already in a losing battle long before it even started.
His face erupted into pink over what you said through the receiver. "I- no! Listen, let me finish this mission and we can continue talking about this when I get home? I'll have a new one with me too, okay?" He can't believe that you called him when he was busy about something as small as chapstick. He'll just have to make it up to you, it seems, huh?
dazai!
menace to all of your items
likes to refer to everything as "our items"
knew exactly what he was doing
he once??? bit your chapstick?? out of nowhere????
loves to fluster you too which so it's a win-win to him
You were just sitting at your desk. You didn't bother anyone so far, did all your work for now, everything. So why, oh why, must the brunet get interested in what you're doing as soon as he sees your tube of chapstick come out of your drawer. "Ah, hey, can I borrow some?" He practically towered over you as he leaned against your desk.
You didn't even have the chance to open it before he started to bug you. However, this wasn't the first time he did this, so you just ignored him. The last time you offered it to him, he didn't even use it; it stayed in his pocket for a week before it took a swim in the river. He pouted when he realized you were still hung up on the last incident. He waited for you to look up after applying it to kiss you. "Vanilla? Good taste." He smugly massaged it into his lips as he left your desk.
ranpo!
makes sure every one you purchase is even mildly related to candy
"if you're applying it all the time at least make it taste like something we'll both enjoy!"
he slowly started to use your chapstick as time went on and he liked it more
got to the point where he'd somehow use the whole thing in a week? sir calm down
you carry two on you at all times now
Ranpo groaned while leaning back in his chair. Atsushi and Kyouka watched him blandly. "(Y/N) is so mean! Who buys a new flavour of chapstick out of nowhere?" He's been whining about the same thing for the past hour. You had to buy an emergency chapstick due to a misplacement of one of them. Ranpo was throwing a fit because he saw the different coloured tint and couldn't believe you decided to not have matching chapstick with him.
"But can you believe that? What about all the memories we had together with the same chapstick? I've been betrayed!" Something rolled off his desk and plopped onto the floor. Everyone in the room deadpanned while Ranpo refused to look. The very same chapstick he was complaining about laid at the bottom of his chair. "Oh."
honourable mentions!
sigma! man remembers every little detail about your favourite chapstick, down to every ingredient - had a mini meltdown in the store when he realized one changed and didn't know if you still wanted it
akutagawa! what's lip care? in all honesty the only time he'll go out of his way to apply it is if you offer it to him or he kisses you when you freshly applied it - wouldn't go out of his way to use anything other than that
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lnkedmyheart · 2 years ago
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Holy shit.
I am going through my annotations in sb and like Dazai, this 16 year old child, was repeatedly refered to as a monster, a demon, an evil of the worst kind, soulless etc.
The only people who viewed him as a person were Oda, Ango and Chuuya. Even Oda slipped up a bunch of times and refered to him as being born for the mafia.
No wonder Dazai was so hung up on Chuuya's comment during dragon head. One of the few people who repeatedly treats him like he is a teenaged menace rather than a demon getting mad at him to that extent that they felt the need to remind him why such a perception of him exists must have hurt like a bitch. No wonder Dazai decided to do what he did.
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soupthatistohot · 1 year ago
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BSD: An Absurdist Analysis - Chapter 6
The Absurdity of Ranpo Edogawa
[Masterpost]
This chapter focuses on introducing Ranpo Edogawa to Atsushi and the reader, as our protagonist is forced to accompany this quirky yet mysterious agency member on a mission to solve a murder case. 
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Ranpo is presented as blunt and childish, and ridiculously so. He goes around telling everyone about how he’s the greatest detective and is better than them, yet Atsushi has to assist him on a case simply because he doesn’t know how the train system works. 
The only thing I’ll say about the murder case itself is that it’s BSD’s earliest example of governmental and police corruption, a theme that will appear multiple times throughout the manga, especially in the Hunting Dogs arc later on. Corruption of this sort is in of itself an absurdity of life, and a very common one — and an organization like the Armed Detective Agency is a force that pushes back against this absurdity. In this chapter, Ranpo serves as the rebellious force doing so. 
Detective Minoura is very dismissive of Ranpo and the agency, claiming multiple times that Ranpo basically an immature hack who couldn’t possibly solve the case. He’s clearly very frustrated by Ranpo’s presence and is very quick to assume the worst in him just because of his childish demeanor. This is played up for the sake of dramatic irony, but I also think it’s representative of Minoura’s (and the institution of police as a whole’s) tendency to overlook those who don’t hold power over them. 
Dazai joins the gang once he’s pulled from the river, claiming to have been “enjoying the current” and seeking a woman to enact a double suicide with. I do believe this is a front, though, and he just needed an excuse to be a menace and to be involved with the case so he could point out to Atsushi later that Ranpo does not, in fact, have a special ability at all (although this is just a theory of mine). 
The fact that Ranpo doesn’t have an ability but pretends he does is extremely important to his character. While I have not read the Untold Origins light novel, I did watch the adaptation in season 4 of the anime, and although I understand the anime adaptations of the light novels leave a lot out, it did emphasize Ranpo’s struggle to connect with others. He referred to himself as a “monster,” and was unable to relate to the people around him after his parents died. I bring this up because it's the reason he pretends he has an ability, it gives him an excuse for being different from others. 
What absurdists often do in their storytelling is exaggerate something absurd about our reality in order to bring the reader’s attention to said thing, and the presence of abilities in BSD allows for that to happen. Those with abilities are often outcasts of society, and abilities are also the catalyst for conflict in the BSD world. Akutagawa in chapter 3 was a great example of this — because random violence does exist in our real world, but it was exaggerated and made even more horrific because of Rashoumon’s destructive power. 
Ranpo’s non-ability ability is an absurd paradox, then.
Up until the end of the chapter, we’re made to believe that Ranpo is an ability user. While the idea that someone can simply solve a mystery in mere minutes because they have a magical superpower is already absurd, you know what’s even more absurd than that? The person in question just pretending to have a superpower and solving the case solely by use of their intuition.
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Ranpo’s masquerade of having an ability is his way of combating an absurd reality because if he’s not an ability user, he’s a freak. But because he gets to pretend to be an ability user, he not only has an excuse for his crazy intellect, but everyone has to at least tolerate his odd personality. It makes him feel less othered. 
Is it convoluted and a bit insane? Perhaps. But that’s kind of the point of embracing the absurd. The ways in which characters often revolt against the absurdity of life is by being somehow even more absurd, by doing something even crazier. 
So why does Dazai make a point of allowing Atsushi to believe Ranpo is an ability-user for the whole case, only to reveal afterward that he is not? He could have told Atsushi from the get-go, or he could’ve not told him at all, so why do what he did?
Apart from the fact that it just makes for more suspenseful storytelling (remember, this is only the sixth chapter, Asagiri is trying to keep the audience engaged right now as he builds his character and world), I think that Dazai is teaching Atsushi to not take everything at face value. Ultimately, he’s training Atsushi to be a detective, and that means that he should be questioning everything, considering every possibility. 
This idea lends itself to absurdism because if you don’t question the supposed truths of reality, you’re essentially giving in and allowing the absurdity to control you rather than pushing back against it. To Dazai, this is a way to train Atsushi to look at the world differently — he presents him with an apparent truth (Ranpo is an ability user) and then forces him to bring that into question, to expose the absurdity (that Ranpo is just ridiculously smart).
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gildeddlily · 2 years ago
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finally reading Fifteen and not only analysis ab it on tumblr
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alr, I watched those episodes a million time but a lot of things weren't clear and I don't trust bones with their light novel's adaptations. it was... the fight against Rimbaud was like longest than everything, and they cut off a lot of parts of it, but also of the interactions between skk. I understand it but it's a pity alr?
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i love him. no fr dark era dazai pisses me off (try to ask me why idk, I just do), agency dazai is alright, but fifteen Dazai is my heart and soul and I love him with all my heart. stormbringer Dazai too, I just love so much how he is...
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...alr I already knew like everything that was ab to happen in this, cause I watched the anime and read analysis ab the light novel on tumblr and other social, but to see it written down like this hurts. I just love the way Asagiri writes, it's so forward and simple but so enjoyable and sad I'm gonna spend all my money on his light novels
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CHUUYA IS HERE CHUUYA IS HERE MY DARLING IS HERE btw Chuuya is perfect in every single era. In every panel he's in, in every light novel he's even slightly nominated, in everything. even when he has his little twenty seconds appearance, I just can't help myself. "-a person that had personality"... good luck bby
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are they flirting? Yes? No? yes they are shut up (I can hear chuuya's voice actor saying that, and that intonation is like the "aww poor baby want me to pick up where he left" IT IS DON'T LIE TO YOURSELF) and reading fifteen was so beautiful cause it clashes so much with innocent/sweet potato!chuuya that a lot of people seems to love. he's just menacing and hurting and killing people every two sentences
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the anime really isn't enough (here he's talking about Mori after he admits he has killed the former boss: Mori's always referred as a demon, shinigami, the evil itself- and a non-human who act as such and knows it, and the connection to what Dazai thinks about himself is making me cry)
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HE JUST DIDN'T yeah he thinks shit like "he's the most vicious thing on heart" and then calls him a timid street doctor
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...he didn't just him a fairy did he?
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yeah bud he kinda is a child. like, you're one too, so admit it and go on with your life. I just have to hug that chaotic energy chuuya has.
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it's a pity it was cut, cause it would have been hilarious. and scary but still hilarious (chuuya's so dramatic and for good reasons) (dazai wants to go home) (no alr he wants to die but wait a little cm)
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...what is this kafka love
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It's so sad, and kinda beautiful too, the way he acts so freely when he's fighting anyone, and when he's with dazai. He's known him for like a day and already is more honest with him than his so called family. (chuuya beliefs about what his role is are heart shattering, and I'm gonna found another shirase hate club. he pissed me off a lot when I read stormbringer but now he really is making me rip off my hair)
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dazai was manipulating all of them from the beginning, and in this scene he's also doing everything only to make the Sheeps betray Chuuya, but I don't think this was necessary (the "is that not enough/he's your friend"). he definitely knew that they wouldn't have understood and ignore that and straight up leave Chuuya behind, but he said that for a reason, like he was testing them- and chuuya. he said it was fun to mess up with him- and chuuya sees his family refusing to trust him and a guy he hates understanding him better than them, and I guess it doesn't feel good
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he's actually being genuine!? he already is a bastard manipulator, but I like to think that 15!dazai was more honest and childish. not really was, more act, tried to impersonate that part of him.
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this is Dazai, at the idea of pranking Chuuya by making him fall in a pool of mud and pour flour over him
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that's dazai right after he killed the GSS man from the oh so famous clip where he shoot him like five times. and this is dazai around chuuya, in the like two days the got to know each other. is the opposite thing. he laughs, he smiles, he fucking flushes at the idea of making fun of him.
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this is hilarious. asagiri actually is a comedy master. I laughed. and I'm not ashamed.
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gay behaviour. homosexual tendencies. romantic tension. he had to fight himself not to blush (not really but inwardly awkward 15!dazai is my life)
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"do you trust me?" it's their line, and theirs only. like even if you don't want to see them as a romantic couple, the trust they have in each other is so beautiful. everybody always talks about chuuya trusting dazai with corruption, but dazai's survival in dead apple was assured by chuuya himself, so our guy just put (another time, remember the hostage situations) his life in chuuya's hands trusting him? trust is their thing, and you people saying that it wasnt the same after dazai's deflection, fuck no. they were the same, with the rich-girl-act that really was the "are we alright?" silent question, and the we-are-partners-even-tho-i-said-ex
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CHUUYA'S LAUGHING AT DAZAI'S DOG JOKE CAUSE HE ALSO ADMITS THAT HE WANTS TO LIVE he's so precious and even tho I'm the number one fan of dazai-fell-first-and-harder I love Chuuya starting to care, starting to get used to dazai.
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and more of this. asagiri is screaming at us that chuuya basically saved dazai. or at least, he made the life mori constricted him to carry on more enjoyable (in the anime they switched the sentences, chuuya saying "don't tell me what to do" but this is actually better)
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I love rimbaud, my bby is doing all of this to know what happened to verlaine and it's so cute (the fact that they completely cut off verlain's name and just left the "I killed him with my own hands" says a lot ab bones future plans ab stormbringer and asagiri introducing him in the central plot. it's not gonna happen guys or the anime only are gonna get their brains blown up)
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chuuya struggling with his humanity since he was able to understand the concept itself is canon, and I wanna die
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"if they were with eachother they didn't have anything to fear" and it's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. verlaine and rimbaud were the original soukoku. fuck zskk, we hate mori and we love the cold man and his made-in-a-laboratory boyfriend (they had a (fr terrible) relationship in real life, so asagiri is telling us something. that they're just canon)
now, to end this, just more screens of chuuya surprising dazai (with official illustration too), the most canon and pretty thing of this light novel after the love confession ab rimbaud and verlaine
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im done
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rainythealias · 2 years ago
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Spring's Flowers
(This references day 4's fic!) Spring was abloom in the air. And so were Akutagawa's pollen allergies, coming in full swing just like the daffodils.
Chuuya groaned at the loud sound of another sneeze followed by coughs. School was almost out, and he'd already heard Akutagawa sneeze eleven times. It's not that the kid wasn't great, it's just that loud sneezing followed by loud coughing was just not a good environment for schoolwork. Plus, he had a majority of his classes with him and hearing this all day was tiring. He offers a tissue, and the other accepts it gratefully, holding it to his runny nose. Chuuya scribbles down a few more answers, then gets up to turn in his worksheet, passing a certain boy as he walked. 
A tiny shred of paper tickles the back of his neck as he walks back, Dazai having flung it at him. He sighs in annoyance, sitting back down and pulling out his phone. 
It wasn't scheduled to rain later, he noted. He'd have to drag the scrawny mackerel outside for some fresh air and good old vitamin D.
Getting bored, he scrolled through his various social medias before the bell rung and he could finally leave. He walks over to Dazai, asks if he wants to hang out, then practically pulls Dazai outside by the collar after he was given a yes. They walked back, exchanging quips and comments, yelling at each other occasionally. When they reached Chuuya's house, Dazai immediately went over to the pile of small rocks and pebbles that had accumulated under Chuuya's bedroom window and chucked a small one at him. 
Upon impact, Chuuya shouts angrily, stomping over and throwing it back at him, careful to not actually hurt him. Dazai falls theatrically to the ground, clutching his head.
"Oh! The chibi has mortally wounded me! I shall spend my last moments in great suffering and devastation! Whatever shall I do!? Chibi, do not be so cruel! Embrace me in my final moments on this depressing mortal coil!" 
Dazai proceeds to shuffle over on his knees, slumping over onto Chuuya's shins and squeezing them with his arms. Chuuya huffs and picks him up by the armpits. The other dusts himself off.
"Why are there so many rocks over there?"
"My menace of a neighbor throws them at my window every night at 9:14 exactly. Every single night. If he misses a night, he doubles the amount he uses the next night."
One of them eventually switches the topic, and the two go fill up their water bottles and grab quick snacks, Chuuya watching Dazai to make sure that the other didn't practically glue himself to a piece of furniture in order to avoid the outdoors. Since Chuuya lived in a more suburban area of Yokohama, he had access to a grassy hill in the back, complete with asphalt road for people and a small dirt path from being tread on so often. 
They walk up the road, going into the grass once they spot the path. They walk quietly, their usual chatting kept to a minimum as the sun shone down on them.
At one point, Dazai bends down to inspect a pretty blue flower, the pollen dusting his fingers and the sun making his eyelashes and hair look slightly amber.
Chuuya smiles.
It was a good day.
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dazais-crab-addiction · 2 years ago
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The headcanon that Dazai is nonbinary but like doesn't understand shit about it and is like yeah its just whatever and doesn't tell anyone. Like he figures it out while he's in hiding and not talking to anyone or whatever so he never really established the whole, yeah im enby and I have ever right to be referred to as they/them.
So he starts working at the ada and doesn't mention it cuz he thinks it doesn't matter, and he's just a goofy menace so no one picks up on the fact he gets super uncomfortable when referred in any way as a man. Except Ranpo of course, but like he'd recently been given a talking to about not outing information about people without their consent so he doesn't say anything. For some reason no one picks up on the fact that Ranpo never refers to Dazai as masculine or uses he/him.
But Dazai is Dazai so of course he never gets his shit together and it reaches a breaking point where he's absolutely miserable and its worse than usual and he can't figure out why. And Ranpo is like fuck all of this everyone is so stupid! And just stands up in the middle of the office when everyone's there and just announces that Dazai is nonbinary and to only use they/them pronouns or Ranpo will come for their bones (have i mentioned i also have a fondness for protective Ranpo).
And everyone immediately respecting that and enforcing it to anyone who interacts with Dazai too is just mind blowing to Dazai. And they finally start thinking of themselves as solely they/them and it makes them feel so much better about themself.
Obviously they're still an absolute menace because in what world is Dazai not ya know. But it really opens up a new world of trust between them and their coworkers. Anyways yeah, I just think about that sometimes.
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sigmadolos · 2 years ago
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@nonhumen​​ said: ★ (pwetty pwease for dazai....)
send ★ for greek nicknames/phrases/terms sigma might give UNIQUELY to your muse
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whispers how about i sweeten the deal for you, i give you some terms for main verse aND DOA Dazai hmmm?
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ADA DAZAI:
ἀνακλώθω  -   ‘ to undo the thread of one's life, to change one's destiny ‘  (although technically it’s more i change my destiny since ancient greek does definitions by masculine singular from what i understand.) more fitting than Sigma probably knows, but knowing enough of how Dazai was from information from Fyodor and others to how he is now in the ADA, Sigma thinks it applies to Dazai quite well even just on that principle from Port Mafia Executive to ADA. He’s also ended up changing Sigma’s. Or at least is trying to.
κελαινεφής - black with clouds, shrouded in clouds ; especially pre-mersault, it’s definitely a way Sigma would choose to think. He knows Dazai is dangerous, he’s like Fyodor but Not, hence the black clouds. He also knows a storm is inevitably coming. It can also be a fun POST one in that clouds can look bad from a distance, but turn out to not be so bad or not bad at all. Refuge even, especially on hot days (and heat of the battle hM)
ἀνεμοεπάκτης - windbringer ; someone who brings about change essentially, be it for better or worse. It’s a word that could potentially be used also in term of troublemaker (in which case, he also says this for DOA Dazai too), but more serious/poetic, where Dazai appears, so do the winds.
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DOA DAZAI:
αστερόσκονη / ἀστέρος κονία  - star dust (modern / ancient )  ;  to be honest he just likes the sound of it and it’s probably his favorite to start calling esp post kiss. bUT!! also he thinks it fits well. for the abyss that Dazai can look like, but the movement and sparks that can show up. like stardust in the night - sometimes too small to notice, but also can be beautiful when you do, like a comet’s tail.
σεληνόβλητος - moonstruck ; he’d probably use this teasingly any time he manages to stun Dazai or get his brain to shut down. very teasingly just murmur it and point out that he notices Dazai’s been thrown off rhythm. Sometimes it can be sweetly shared , other times its 100% menace with a smug smile.
ενόχληση - annoyance / nuisance  ; listen this is straight forward. He’s a Menace to this manager sometimes.
Ο άνεμος μου - my wind ; i promise the fact there’s so many wind references was not intentional but i guess we know what Sigma ties Dazai to regardless of verse. But in all seriousness, an affectionate term from him, said either gently or exasperated, but more often the latter. Dazai can be like a gust of wind, although it can cause chaos, it can also be refreshing and just what someone needs, it can push him further/higher or tug him back into reality. 
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ao3feed-fyozai · 1 year ago
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A Farce in Four Acts
read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/KdL8ltr
by olympiansally
“It’s fake” Dazai assures him, sitting with his legs crossed on his unmade bed “Totally, completely, absolutely just a pretend thing” Chuuya just stares at him, digesting it in silence as he slowly blinks at Dazai across from him and hopes some of his discomfort can pass for confusion. He wonders why Dazai sounds so desperate to convey this to him when this shouldn’t be any of Chuuya’s business. But Dazai huffs an annoyed breath at his lack of answer, wrinkling his nose in impatience and the soft sunlight catches in his face just right and he is so beautiful, with his stupid silly pout and Chuuya can’t even hold the denial in place for half a second apparently. So alright, Dazai is in a fake relationship and maybe Chuuya does care.
 Or, that one College AU where all the tropes apply, featuring Dazai’s attempts at communicating that only make things worse and the ensuing chaos
Words: 11041, Chapters: 1/20, Language: English
Fandoms: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Categories: M/M
Characters: Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs)
Relationships: Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), fake - Dazai Osamu/Fyodor Dostoyevsky, side - Fyodor Dostoyesvky/Nikolai Gogol, side - Akutagawa Ryuunosuke/Nakajima Atsushi
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Requited Unrequited Love, Mutual Pining, so much mutual pining, the pining is there and mutual the entire time, Yearning, Jealousy, taps hood of this fic - this baby can fit so many tropes, Fyodor Dostoyevsky is a menace (affectionate), illegal rooming arrengements, Slow Burn, Smut, Switching, Top Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Bottom Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Top Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Bottom Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai-Typical Suicide References (Bungou Stray Dogs), Cussing, a whole lot of cussing, but like as much as they probably would in canon if the rating allowed it, Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya's Unconventional Mating Rituals (Bungou Stray Dogs), but they are wholesome as shit in this one, like so badly in love it's actually enraging, mutual simping, that should be a tag
read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/KdL8ltr
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sskk-ao3feed · 2 months ago
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A razor blade to cut through my tongue
read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/QnRS3I7 by Thefy0z4il0ver Words: 469, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con Categories: F/F, F/M, M/M Characters: Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Ryuunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs), Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Fyodor Dostoyevsky (Bungou Stray Dogs), Bram Stoker (Bungou Stray Dogs), Lucy Maud Montgomery (Bungou Stray Dogs), Izumi Kyouka (Bungou Stray Dogs), Miyazawa Kenji (Bungou Stray Dogs), Fukuchi Ouchi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nikolai Gogol (Bungou Stray Dogs), Sigma (Bungou Stray Dogs), Yosano Akiko (Bungou Stray Dogs), Edogawa Ranpo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Edgar Allan Poe (Bungou Stray Dogs), Mori Ougai (Bungou Stray Dogs), Elise (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Jouno Saigiku (Bungou Stray Dogs), Suehiro Tecchou (Bungou Stray Dogs), Ookura Teruko (Bungou Stray Dogs), Tachihara Michizou (Bungou Stray Dogs) Relationships: Dazai Osamu/Fyodor Dostoyevsky (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nikolai Gogol/Sigma (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Gin/Higuchi Ichiyou, Akutagawa Ryuunosuke/Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Lucy Maud Montgomery/Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Ryuunosuke/Lucy Maud Montgomery/Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Ivan Goncharov/Shibusawa Tatsuhiko (Bungou Stray Dogs), Izumi Kyouka/Miyazawa Kenji (Bungou Stray Dogs) Additional Tags: Dazai Osamu is a Mess (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions (Bungou Stray Dogs), Top Fyodor Dostoyevsky (Bungou Stray Dogs), Bottom Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Rape/Non-con Elements, Fluff, Smut, Angst, Lace Panties, Chains, Abuse, Mental Health Issues, Nikolai Gogol is a Menace (Bungou Stray Dogs), Sadistic Fyodor Dostoyevsky (Bungou Stray Dogs), Triggers, Drugs, Rough Sex, Genderfluid Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Trans Male Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Silly, Clowns, Sigma is So Done (Bungou Stray Dogs), Scared Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), broken dazai, Bottom Dazai, bottom Dazai Osamu, transfem sigma, She/Her and They/Them Pronouns for Sigma (Bungou Stray Dogs), nikolai gogol is crazy, Dragon Shibusawa Tatsuhiko (Bungou Stray Dogs), Trans Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Fyodor Dostoyevsky is Bad at Feelings (Bungou Stray Dogs), BDSM, Master/Pet, Sex, Sex and Drugs, References to Drugs, Dazai is mentally ill, Vomiting, Sick Character, Sadism, Knifeplay, Homophobia, Misgendering Kink read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/QnRS3I7
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fyodior · 2 years ago
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⋆ SLEEPING ALONE? ⋆
headcanon ➫ BSD boys when they come home to find you sleeping with their clothes (ft. dazai, chuuya, akutagawa)
notes ➫ mostly gender neutral reader, 1 or 2 references to afab, some sex references
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dazai
Dazai came home in the middle of the day because he got bored at work and he’s a fucking menace to society
You had spent the night and then stayed because you had the day off, were not expecting him to be home until later
(But honestly you should expect anything and everything from Dazai)
You had been picking up clothes that were thrown on the floor last night after some ~fun~
Picked up his button down and had this weird moment where you really missed him even though you just saw him, and he was coming home later
(You were probably about to start your period)
You laid back down with his shirt but accidentally fell asleep
(He kept you up very late)
Anyway, back to Dazai showing up
Evil laughs while he slips out his phone to take a pic that he would probably harass you with later
Re: menace to society
It does really warm his heart though, he absolutely adores you in every single way
He crouches down next to you and gently brushes your hair out of your face so he can press a little kiss to your forehead :”)
He jokes around and is a silly little man but truly no one has ever loved him as fiercely and deeply as you do
So he just sits next to you for a little bit, thinking abt this and how much he loves you back
He sighs before pulling back the covers and laying down with you, gathering you up all tight in his arms
You unconsciously toss the shirt to the side before fuckin bear hugging the poor man (still asleep, not much can wake you)
He sees you smile a little bit since you get to hug an actual Dazai :)
Realizes he absolutely cannot get up no matter what now, lest he disturb your slumber
Texts Kunikida that he can’t come back in for the day, puts his phone on DND because he knows its about to get absolutely blown up by the poor man who just wants to do his silly little job
Kisses your forehead a billion times before getting all comfy and falling asleep too :-)
⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹
chuuya
Returns back to his apartment after a weeklong trip away on some sort of evil business trip who knows
He opens the door to his bedroom to see you sleeping in his bed, with one of his black trench coats wrapped around you
Slightly catches him off guard bc you don’t live together, but you obvi have a key so like not that weird
Laughs a silly little Chuuya chuckle before getting ready for bed himself
He doesn’t want to disturb you just yet
Idk I just love to imagine the boys and their silly little nighttime routines
I like to imagine Chuuya’s isn’t anything complicated but does take the time to brush his teeth, wash his face and moisturize (only uses the right things bc you bought them for him), and brush his hair before conking out
Makes his way over to the bed to gently shake you awake, whispering your name
Your eyes flutter open and take a second to take in the situation and the person waking you up
But as soon as you do, you’re wide awake and absolutely throw yourself onto the poor man who is probably very tired
He catches you but laughs, petting your hair as you squeeze the absolute shit out of him
“I’m so happy you’re finally home :’)”
“Me too, baby”
He asks why you have his coat wrapped around you, surely that cannot be comfortable to sleep in
Your cheeks heat up because you’re just a lil embarrassed
“I really missed you, and having your coat on felt like you were hugging me :(“
He feels both adoration because that’s so sweet, but sadness because he hated that him leaving you made you so sad
He pulls the coat off you and tosses it off the side of the bed
Pulls you into his arms and hugs you so tightly, bc damn he’ll be better than a stupid coat
You relax into the touch that you missed you so so much
You stick your hands up his shirt to feel his skin
He yelps because your hands are fuckin cold
“Is this better, my love?”
“So much better”
⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹
akutagawa
Comes home after a long day with the pm to see you curled up on the couch, holding his t-shirt to your chest
(we’re assuming he has to own t-shirts I mean c’mon there’s no way he sleeps with that frilly ass blouse on)
You very clearly had been folding fresh laundry when you conked out
For a reason Akutagawa cannot understand his t-shirt comforted you enough to lull you into an accidental nap
(You knew why; he is cold to the entire world but an angel to you)
He’s annoyed at first, old Akutagawa kicking in where he does that thing of getting pissed at nothing
Reassesses the situation and actually realizes it’s very endearing
Still absolutely cannot grasp why you find so much comfort in him
He crouches down to try to take the shirt from you to wake you up so he can shoo you to bed (nicely, of course)
You have that shit in a death grip
He sighs the Akutagawa Sigh™
“Love, c’mon, let me take you to bed”
“hMppHHH, Ryuuu” (you are not roused easily)
He is finally able to wake your ass up
Takes you by the hand to lead you gently to the bedroom so he can put you to sleep, obvi with the intention of joining you
Must undress from earlier mentioned frilly ass blouse
That shirt will have to be pried from your cold dead fingers
Sheds frilly ass blouse, brushes teeth, makes last minute evil phone calls, etc, before crawling into the futon with you
As soon as he lays down with you, you immediately toss the t-shirt and throw yourself onto him
He does a little oof
- You wrap your arms around him and he does the same, pressing a kiss to your forehead
“Love, can I ask why you fell asleep with my t-shirt”
“Mmmmm, smells just like you. Dryer made it feel warm and cuddly like you.”
Aku hmmphs at the warm and cuddly part, but it secretly endears him
“But don’t need the shirt anymore, I got the real thing. Smells and warmth and all,” you whisper before nodding back off to sleep
You reach for him unconsciously and he pulls you even closer to him
Again he literally cannot grasp the concept of someone loving him for the entirety of who he is, but has come to accept it from you very gratefully
He has a very hard time saying it, but your love for his little things, something as small and specific as his scent (which he was not aware of), makes his heart swell with joy
Grinch moment where his heart grew 3 times its size or something
Will happily take the place of cuddled t-shirt any day <3
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midnight-strays · 4 years ago
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Hello! Could I request a scenario or headcannons for Mori who has a doctor S/O with an ability similar to Trafalgar Law's Ope Ope No mi? Like they are probably the most friendly person in the mafia but on the battle feild they are a raging badass that does weird things like play golf with their sword and enemies heads while their conscious. How do you think everyone would to react them (Mafia + ADA)?
//I added a few references to Law and his ability but shifted more to what they think of them instead of a reaction towards them.
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The wind seemed to pick up as you held out your hand in front of you, clenching it into a fist and after a moment, opened once more, a bright orb releasing and expanding around your form. It grew and grew until the perimeter was completely enclosed by what now looked to be a translucent dome that disappeared as quickly as it came. Your sharp eyes searched the area for your fellow Mafioso's, your ability allowing you to not just feel where they were but to lock onto their presence and move them at will. The smell of blood was thick in the air and upon finding three of the sources, men on your side, you reached out again, swept your hand in a grabbing motion and pulled your fist towards yourself. For a split second, the injured disappeared from sight, before reappearing once more a few feet behind you where they would be safe. 
“Stay there and don’t move around too much. I’ll fix the three of you up when this is all over and I don’t feel like losing friends today,” you directed to them, receiving no response in return, but knowing all too well that they would not disobey. With the injured out of harms way, you shifted your attention back to the battle, just on time to see the enemy firing at you. With a sweep of your hand, just like last time, the bullets were gone and redirected at the offender, shooting him down with his own ammunition. 
“This is boring, let’s add some excitement shall we?” You hummed with a growing smirk, stretching out both your arms, fingers spread apart and then crossing your forearms together. Anyone who had their eyes on you may have had a clue what you were doing but those who didn’t and were your enemy noticed and felt nothing, even as you uncrossed them, severing limbs and heads from bodies. 
Screams and yells of terror and confusion filled the space before you and with a sharp laugh, you found a leg and a hand in your hands. “Batter up!” 
With a swing and a loud cry from the conscious head once in your grasp, it went flying through the air and through a window with a distant crash.
“Home run!”
Port Mafia
Needless to say, the members of the Port Mafia are very aware who you are and what you are capable of. 
For starters, as Ougai Mori’s significant other, what you say pretty much goes as no one really wishes to face is wrath if you were to be dismissed.
Not to say this is the only reason they listen to you though. You are also their top doctor. Not only do you have your medical studies backing you up but your ability and nickname, Surgeon of Death, allowed you to do just about anything. 
Ever since joining the mafia, many lives had been saved, surgeries performed without risk of being caught and thrown in prison, and all in all, you had just gained so much respect by being so reliable, that people listen to you regardless of your standing with the boss. 
Most do find your ability to be a little intimidating and thus find your intimidating considering you can technically dismember and rearrange their limbs at will if you so chose to. 
Being as nice as you are though, no one really thinks you would do that to them but it does surface every now and then when you’re brutal towards enemies. 
Mori loves every part of you. He loves that you’re super sweet to everyone you meet but the moment you need to, you put all that kindness away and let your inner freak out. He tends to find it really amusing when you start messing with people, especially since you can walk around with a conscious head in your hands without there being any blood loss. It’s that sick side of him that finds it really hot.
Someone like Chuuya though hates working with you. You’re great and all and you’re a good friend but with his ability being way different to others, you have a hard time detecting him with your ability. This means there has been more than one occasion where you have accidentally removed a limb or two from him in the middle of battle.
“Oh shit… uh, sorry about that Chuuya, let me just uh, reattach that for you.”
Armed Detective Agency
For starters, you joined the mafia long before Dazai left so the suicidal maniac is very familiar with you. It was interesting to find that having him in your dome didn’t cancel out your ability so you were still able to work with him but it’s best to keep your distance from each other so you didn’t accidentally make contact. If that happened while using your ability, it would become incredibly messy. 
So now as a detective, he is very aware of how much of a threat you are. When up against you, he tries to disable you as quickly as possible so there are no casualties. Once you’ve got your grasp on someone though, he stays back, trusting that you won’t needlessly kill someone.
The rest of the ADA is very weary of you too, knowing how dangerous you can be and are. However, while they wouldn’t verbally admit to it, based on what Dazai has told them, they would much prefer your medical methods than that of Yosano considering it would hurt way less and be a hell of a lot less scary. 
Most of them think you’re incredibly twisted though, especially those who are aware of how kind you are when you’re not in the middle of a job. To be able to switch from sweet to menacing in a second just isn’t normal. 
I feel you’ve probably known Mori for a long while so chances are, Fukuzawa is also very familiar with you. You’re probably friends to be fair but he is not fond of many of your decisions.
If for whatever reason Yosano is out of commission, Fukuzawa will call upon you if it’s an emergency because he knows you’re not cruel enough to turn down an urgent request from him or anyone in need really. 
Most ADA members have had at least one limb removed by you at some point in the last few years but you have never gone out of your way to harm anyone as they are good people.
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chazukekani · 5 years ago
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Analysis - Chapter 79
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To begin with, let’s talk about the coloured illustration before the chapter actually starts (this one👇🏻)
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Take a look of the birdcage in the middle and the upper left hand side of the illustration, which they are both absent with birds. I bet you all familiar with the ‘birdcage’ quote delivered by Gogol, where he says he wishes to be as free as the birds. Shortly after Asagiri demonstrates Gogol’s revival with his realisation of being free - killing his best friend - this illustration appears. Does it symbolise that Gogol has already found the ultimate way to achieve his life goal? Does it mean that his action is justified? I am happy about Gogol finding a resolution to achieve his aspirations, but killing of your loved ones (general love I mean) is surely heart-breaking. Would Asagiri justify his action? How will his action be resulted as the story develop? It is left to your thoughts.
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The chapter begins with Atsushi figuring where The Page is. As predicted from fan theories, Sigma transferred his knowledge about The Page to Atsushi at the moment when Atsushi holds him while Sigma’s fall. I think the action of Sigma gives out two messages. First, it shows the strong ability of empathy that Atsushi possessed. The nature of pure kindness, plus his tough past, has shaped the personality of Atsushi. His vicissitudes of his life allowed him to be sympathetic about other’s past and experience, as portrayed before through his attitude towards Kyouka, Lucy, or even Margaret. Even though Sigma meant to be his enemy, Atsushi manages to treat him heart to heart, and listen to his thoughts sincerely despite the emergency and priorities of his mission. Kindness allow one to influence others, and this is the strength of Atsushi. It may sound cliche, but altogether with his special ability, bravery, it shapes Nakajima Atsushi.
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Secondly, Sigma’s action obviously further consolidate his personality. He is a man who claimed himself with no talent. Sigma is also a man with no shelter except the Casino. I therefore perceive him a rather down-to-earth person comparing with his colleagues. He does not have a lofty ambition, or an epic master plan for his ideal world. He knows what it feels as a mortal (even technically his is not an organic human :p). As a man who works hard, and communicates with lots of people, he surely has a deeper/alternative understanding towards humanity. That’s why he can be moved by Atsushi’s lines. Two men who both experienced toughness and worked very hard, may possibly thus manage to understand each other.
The flashback of Ango is quite interesting. However there is not much detail I can refer to, so I will just talk for a little bit. Ango mentions that the countless amount of information he receives from his ability had resulted in his brain malfunction before. It is possible that Ango, as a government agent, be asked to process different kinds of materials, or even human bodies. The memories that Ango has accumulated should have created a huge burden to him. I am so surprised that he is able to maintain his self-consciousness despite having such large amount of different memories. I mean, I can’t fit in a textbook before exams! Even though you managed to forget about the memories you have gained, there must be some unbelievable or shocking memories that you can never abandon. The mental pressure that Ango bears must be beyond our imagination. Respect!
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Okay let’s talk about what you guys thrilled for after the chapter once released - Kamui. I read different theories about who possibly Kamui will be, and it’s all really insightful! I, who have a small brain, cannot think of any hint who Kamui will be… but I do wanna talk about his name: Kamui. Kamui (神威), which means to threaten/menace the God. I personally find it a rather dodgy/old fashioned name in terms of Kanji if you understand the context( ・᷄ὢ・᷅ ) But our beloved author will never do meaningless things and as big brain right? So let’s continue.
Such frank recognition of God reminds me of the constant reference to existence of God in previous chapters and arcs. Particularly referring back to the previous chapter where Dazai and Fyodor chatting about the will of the God, it reminds of Liberalism, the political/philosophical ideology established in 17th century. It is a theory which believe human should be embodied with freedom and rights, and overturns the previous definition of human - we are born with original sin, which underpinned that humans should obey God. Fyodor argues that God arranged everything in order perfectly; while Dazai thinks humanity struggles, and will be managed to figure they own way out.
For me, it is like a debate between ‘divine’ and ‘human nature’. Liberalists believe that humans are able to learn from experiences, and act rationally, and this fits with Dazai’s general perception towards humanity. So I think Kamui, along with the Decay of Angels, may see themselves as the executioner on behalf of God, and to bring ‘good deeds’, and to restore the order of the world. While Dazai’s belief of human nature, has to counter the war, and lead by Atsushi, in order to demonstrate the central message that needs to be conveyed by Asagiri Kafka. I think it is no surprise that Liberalism can be seen as a reference for this story because ever since Gogol has raised the ‘birdcage’ lines, the issue of liberation, freedom, has to be discussed one day. Asagiri once mentioned in the Setting Catalogue of Dead Apple that the key theme of Bungo Stray Dogs is about ‘the meaning to live’. By coining the definition of humanity, it is a decent way to then further establish your analysis and argument of the best way of living as a human. Such well-organised plot is indeed the reason why I love Bungo Stray Dogs so much.
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fraink5-writes · 7 years ago
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Human Qualification- Chapter 14
December 24
The day after this chapter takes place I would publish the first chapter—wild. When will the chapters catch up? Hmm...
I would like to thank my beta-readers ( @missmizpah @gracieuxetoile and @deathly-oreos) once again for all that they do!
Summary: To slowly lose all your functions until you are nothing but a trapped mind in a deteriorated shell, that’s what it means to be ‘No Longer Human.’
This chapter can also be found on Ao3 here. Without further ado, please enjoy!
“It’s Christmas. What do you want for dinner?” Chuuya nudged at Dazai’s head, which was resting on his chest. The boundaries of personal space and of who claimed what (the bed or the couch) had blurred over the past week. With his legs stretched across the couch, Dazai could have been sleeping. He hardly moved—which was okay with Chuuya; it would have been uncomfortable otherwise.
Dazai responded without missing a beat (“KFC”); he must have been awake.
“Since it is Christmas, I could make something special—what do you mean ‘KFC?!’”
“It’s Christmas, so KFC.”
“You just don’t want to eat my cooking!”
“You put those words in my mouth,” Dazai peeked up at Chuuya briefly before turning away. “But, no, I don’t.”
“It’s gotten better—I fucking swear! If you actually ate it, you would know!”
Dazai quickly pulled away from Chuuya in order to avoid his wrath “Chuuya, I’m forced to eat your cooking every day.” He sighed. “Anyway, it’s Christmas, so why can’t we have KFC?”
“They’re probably out by now,” Chuuya spat.
“I already ordered one.”
“YOU DID?”
“Yeah. As you said, they sell out fast, so I ordered one a while ago.”
“Wait, what did you order?”
“PARTY • BARREL • PARTY • BARREL • PARTY • BARREL...” Dazai continued to chant even as the words garbled together. There was a childlike glimmer in his eye, which Chuuya couldn’t ignore.
“Fine,” Chuuya sighed. “But that’s a lot of food. You better actually eat some of it.”
“The only reason I don’t usually eat is because of your cooking.”
“Fucker!” Chuuya stood up from the couch, slightly miffed. “Alright, I’m going to pick it up then.”
“Wait,” Dazai’s hand clamped around Chuuya’s arm. “I want to come too.”
“Are you sure? Are you up for it? It’s just KFC. I’m just going to go and come back.”
“But. It’s Christmas.” Still hanging onto Chuuya’s sleeve, Dazai averted his gaze.
“Yeah, so? It’ll be a little crowded, but I’m sure they have it under control with staff. This does happen every year.”
“But, the lights. We’re a couple. I thought Chuuya would want to see them. Together.”
Honestly, Chuuya had seen the lights so many times on his commute—he didn’t need to see them again. “Aah, that’s embarrassing. How did you know?”
“It was just a guess.” Dazai smirked, standing up by Chuuya’s side.
After throwing on his coat, Chuuya met Dazai by the door. “Oh, yeah, since you’re leaving the house, you should use this.” Chuuya handed Dazai the walking stick which had previously leaned by the door, unused. Dazai grimaced. “Use it.”
“I hope this isn’t your gift for me. I don’t need it.” Despite his gripes, Dazai took the cane. He clutched it almost desperately with both hands as though if he used only one hand, it would be too difficult to hold. Even with the support of the stick and Chuuya, Dazai, quaking violently, threatened to fall with every step.
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m just cold. I’m fine.”
Dazai wouldn’t accept an argument from Chuuya, so Chuuya just let the subject fall silent, although it never left his mind. As they slowly walked, Chuuya couldn’t look away from Dazai, making sure he was alright.
Dazai, for his part, had quickly moved onto other things. His attention lingered at each decorated storefront. The strands of colored lights seemed to twinkle in his deep brown eyes. Even as his mouth hung slightly agape, he was awed to silence. Maybe it wasn’t a mistake to bring Dazai along.
The walk back wasn’t nearly as pleasantly surreal. Dazai had surrendered to exhaustion; the walking stick became ineffective—thus, Chuuya had to drag him home. For the most part, Dazai was silent except for the occasional shiver or grunt.
When they arrived back at the apartment, Dazai immediately flopped onto the couch, his eyes flickering closed.
“Aren’t you going to eat, Mr. KFC?” Chuuya called from the table.
“Later...”
Chuuya stomped over. “Are you really sleeping now? I got this bucket just for you.”
“I’ll eat it… later...” Dazai yawned. “Wake me up… for presents.... I have something to give you...” With that, Dazai’s head hit the cushion, and he was still. It was impossible for Chuuya to wake Dazai up when he was sleeping so peacefully—not after the nights when Chuuya had to coax Dazai into sleep, not after the restless moments when Dazai jolted from his sleep, gasping.
Chuuya waited a few minutes, watching Dazai’s labored breaths lull, then headed to the table. He would enjoy the chicken at least. As much as he hated to admit it, it was probably better than his own cooking.
After finishing his fair portion of chicken (there was still too much left), Chuuya sauntered into the living room. For a moment, he deliberated letting Dazai sleep but decided against it—Dazai would be annoyed if he woke up the next morning. He ruffled the brunet’s hair.  “Hey, idiot, time to get up.”
“Nnn… oh, is it present time?” Dazai peered at Chuuya through his half-lidded eyes before forcing himself up. “Lemme get yours.”
“Are you sure? You can sit still. I can get it.”
“No, that’s no fun! I don’t want you to spoil it!” Dazai left the couch on shaky footing and hobbled into the bedroom. On his way back, he took a detour into the dining room and inspected the chicken. “Hm, it’s warm enough.” Shoving a wing into his mouth, he returned to the couch. “I’ll eat more tomorrow.”
“You better.” Chuuya grin was menacing under its sweet facade.
“Okay, I guess I’ll present mine first.” Dazai beamed and thrusted a sparkling bag into Chuuya’s hands.
“Hmm… knowing you, you probably got me fake booze.”
“Maybe I did. Open and find out.” Dazai’s smirk neither confirmed nor denied the truth.
Challenged by his partner, Chuuya tore out the tissue paper and peeped inside. His eyes widened before he snatched the disk from the bag. “Moroi Saburou? A vinyl copy?” He stared at Dazai for a solid minute. “Holy shit.” With an irrepressible grin, he threw his arms around Dazai.
Dazai returned Chuuya’s affection with a soft smile. “Merry Christmas, Tsuuya.”
‘Tsuuya?’ Since when? Dazai’s voice had always been so clear and articulate; it flowed from his lips like a song—an extremely attractive melody at that. So when had his voice become so foggy? When did the words start blurring together? Why hadn’t Chuuya noticed earlier?
Without thinking, Chuuya recoiled. Concern was painted over Dazai’s previous smile. “Ts—Chuuya?”
“Oh, sorry,” Chuuya laughed (which was only half-fake). “I forgot to give you my gift! I should do that now. Yeah.”
“Okay.”
“Here.” Chuuya handed Dazai the box he had neatly wrapped in shimmering green paper with red ribbon. It nearly fell through Dazai’s grip, so Chuuya decided to place it on his lap. “Be careful.”
Dazai picked at the paper, but his progress was too slow—practically non-existent—even for the pace he was working at. His trembling fingers just couldn’t get a solid grip on the edges of the wrapping.
Chuuya didn’t want to rush his partner, but he could tell even Dazai was growing impatient—gritting his teeth and muttering frustrated comments under his breath. “Did you try just tearing at it?” Chuuya suggested.
Dazai shook his head, resigned to his inability to open the gift.
“Do you want me to open it then?”
As if powered by spite at Chuuya’s offer, Dazai forcefully tore at the paper, creating a large hole in the wrapping. “See? I donneed you tado it.” Dazai grinned in his forced pride, but Chuuya couldn’t help but wince. He couldn’t hear the meaning over the jumbled sound. Each slur seemed enunciated as to remind Chuuya of his recent discovery.
“A camera?” Dazai’s gasp drew Chuuya back from his thoughts.
“Yeah, you seemed to take an interest in photography, so I thought you would appreciate an actual camera.”
Dazai delicately placed the box back into his lap, staring down at it with dejection. Although his eyes held such longing, his words said otherwise. “I can’t use this.” The silence which overtook his words spoke loudly of his sorrow and regret.
“Well, I can take the pictures, if you want. Just consider me an extension of your camera. Of course, they’ll be your photos.”
Dazai’s smile was hollow. “Then whowill take pho tosof you?”
“Oh, I, uhh..” Chuuya’s face lit up brighter than his hair. In an attempt to calm down, he cleared his throat and gulped down whatever embarrassment remained. “Actually, I also bought a tripod… I didn’t wrap it though—fuck.” He shuffled away from the couch and grabbed the tripod in order to redeem himself.
“Shall we uze it?”
“Do you want to? Because sure.”
“Ya, in fronnof the deccerations. That seemz like a good place.” By ‘decorations,’ Dazai was referring to the tiny tree they had bought and decorated for the hell of it. After draping it with garland and so many lights it could be considered a fire hazard, Chuuya put a drunk Colonel Sanders decoration on top, and then it had been forgotten until that moment.
“Mm, it is Christmas, after all. We should light that thing at least once.”
“Hopeflly, we don cause a power outage alover the city—or worz, a giant fire.”
Ignoring Dazai’s sinister predictions, Chuuya lit up the tree, pulled over chairs for Dazai and himself, then went to work setting up the tripod. “You ready? 30 seconds.” He hurried back to his chair, but when he was sitting, Dazai pointed at the ceiling with a large grin on his face. Hesitant and seriously confused, Chuuya tilted his head up. A few green, leafy branches were dangling from the season.
What the fuck.... When did that get there… Meeting Dazai’s eyes, Chuuya understood.
“Mistletoe,” Dazai said with a smirk. For some reason, that word was as clear as day.
“You piece of shit.” Chuuya rolled his eyes before leaning in to kiss Dazai.
“Mmhmm.” Dazai smiled into his kisses, and it contagiously spread to Chuuya and erased everything else from his mind: the presents, the fire hazard behind them, the—click.
Chuuya’s eyes fluttered open, and his gaze drifted towards the camera before he finally separated himself from Dazai. Well, slightly—he was a breath away. “You fucking tricked me. I can’t believe I fell for such a basic prank.”
Dazai only grinned. Eyes still closed, he was waiting to return to their merriment.
“Don’t you think we should take a fucking decent photo?”
“We don’t need to. We tested it, and it works.” With a whisper, Dazai pulled Chuuya closer and played beckoningly with the curls of his hair.
“Alright, fuck it.” Chuuya brought his lips right up to Dazai’s, but then he paused again. “Can we at least go to the fucking couch?”
Chuuya turned off the blinding Christmas tree then escorted Dazai, who wouldn’t stop teasing at his neck. They soon made themselves comfortable, Chuuya wrapped in Dazai’s arms, on the couch that was no longer Chuuya’s alone, and time flew by thoughtlessly until the good times had to end.
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