#Danny: Dan is child… Dan is baby… without memories… HE IS MY BABY NOW

[noxcheshire]

I go absolutely FERAL for this trope with Danny and Vlad.

It’s just so SCRUMPTIOUS, and then adding in Jason Todd as having once been Dan BUT NOT EVEN REALIZING IT?!

He’s a mama’s boy and he WILL get vengeance.

Danny himself had been looking for Dan for such a long time, furious at Vlad for his actions and the results that came from it. Dan was lost Ancients KNEW where, as a helpless baby! He kept the missing person’s report as active as he could because Dan was still out there, he was alive in some way for his soul and ghost had not returned to the Infinite Realms.

Dan was still alive.

He had to be.

And then Danny is visited by Jason Todd, a young boy so painfully familiar that Danny feels his core shake.

Dan, bound to a clone body and experiencing a relatively calm life with the Fentons, gets de-aged by a jealous Vlad and is held hostage by the man, who wants to be involved with family things. Vlad, somehow, loses the baby.

14 years later, Jason Todd is desperately looking for his mother, only for the DNA test to match him with a 30-year-old transman and a billionaire over 60.

Oh, and his own missing person's report.

[dakotafinely]

I mean if you want too u do that to tho.

(Also let's call the baker lady carol grey she's a serious badass but has a heart of gold. And has 2 granddaughters)

I am LOVING HER ALREADY!!

Alright, alright now I gotta do it, so buckle up kids!

Man, this gets long because I have ideas~ so-

The bullet’s hailed on them like a hell-storm. The sound of them ricocheting scratched against their ears. Leonard lifted himself to take a few shots back whenever he felt he could take the risk.

Danny had a bullet graze his shootin’ arm. And Mickey was trying to find an exit that the police wouldn’t notice. So Leonard was the only thing keeping the police from capturing them completely. Leonard himself was just surprised that the police’s aim was getting better.

“I found one!” Mickey practically shouted, barely heard above the gunshots being fired at them. Mickey lead them into an shaft that had barely enough space to for them to wiggle through. None of them relaxed, even as the hail storm of bullet’s began to fade. Even when they reached the other side and landed themselves in an alleyway of New York City.

Actually, how’d they get topside through a shaft anyways?

“Mickey, why’d you take us topside?” Leonard asked as he helped Danny up. Mickey shrugged “You said you wanted outta there, this was the only exit that didn’t have popo hanging around it.” Mickey responded before he winced. The adrenaline now fading he felt a sharp pain in his tail. Looking down to see a gunshot oozing with blood.

Mickey let out a quiet curse at the pain and curled himself up so the wound would be off the floor, placing pressure on it to stop the blood.

That’s when Carol came by. A white woman with grey roots slowly taking over her hair, placed in a tight floofy ponytail. She was short and hefty and had freckles that looked like constellations on her skin. She was walking by whistling a tune she’d heard on the radio when she overheard the Mud Dogs.

“Mickey when’d you get shot?”

“You act like I’d actually know, all I know is it hurts.”

To see three tall Yokai standing in an alleyway, two with injuries and the third clearly trying to figure out how they’d even get to patch themselves up. She couldn’t help but step in.

“Excuse me,” she spoke, catching the three’s attention with startled stares “you look like you could use some help, I have a good first aid kit in my bakery just down the street. Come on,” she offers with the small tilt of her head out the alleyway. She begun slowly walking over to them as she spoke, trying to get a closer look at them.

Danny has bruises on his face, his clothes torn up from scrapes when they were running away. He held caution as he stared at her, trying to find any hidden motive in her movements.

Leonard had more cuts than Danny did. Scrapes and bruises covering his arms and his torso too. As he kept frequently turning around to shoot off the police and make them lag behind. He was too busy taking a look at Mickey’s most recent gunshot, trying to make sure it hadn’t been infected due to it being on Mickey’s tail.

Mickey also had a gunshot graze his torso, tho it was mostly scab by now and barely bleed when it first appeared. It was what had started the chase, as the police caught them off guard. Shooting at them ruthlessly the whole way through.

“Okay!” Mickey stated enthusiastically, Danny looked at him with a small glare.

“Mickey!” Danny hissed at him, Mickey looked at the rat Yokai with confusion. What? She offered, and they kinda needed the help.

“Danny’s right,” Leonard spoke up, standing up and pointing his pistol at Carol. Who stared at him, un-phased by the gun pointed at her forehead “how do we know you’re not a policemen with a cloakin’ broach?” he growled.

She let out a light huff and a small smiles as she gently moved the gun from her forehead.

“Do you honestly think a policeman would offer help to you?” She asked, almost amused by the idea. Leonard hesitates, before putting his gun away. Danny scoffs a bit.

“Are you kiddin’ me Loathsome? That proves nothing!” he states, begin right in his statement completely.

“Not like we have many other choices Dan,” Leonard retorts before picking up Mickey. Danny reluctantly following behind with no where else to go. Plus, who else was gonna bail his idiot’s out of trouble they get themselves into?

The small group walks down a basically empty street, cars driving by occasionally as they turn to find a small and homey Bakery awaiting them. A small sign hung outside the building that said “Knead Bread? - The Grey’s Family Bakery” in beautiful calligraphy.

Mickey looks smugly at Danny, who sticks his tongue out back at him. Leonard rolls his eyes, knowing what the two are doing without having to look at them.

Carol pulls out a key, hearing the door give a soft click as she unlocked it. Opening it up and turning on the lights.

“Go ahead and take a seat boys, I’ll bring out the first aid kit for ya,” she said, gesturing to the only table in the room with exactly three seats. Leonard plops down Mickey onto the chair and Danny plops himself across from him.

“See Danny, you should know better than to doubt my instincts!” Mickey stated with pride.

“Mickey, your last instinct told you to put jelly and mustard on a sandwich,” Leonard spoke with obvious disgust at just the idea. Crossing his arms and staring with a little bewilderment at the Eel Yokai.

“And it was good! It’s not my fault you didn’t try it!” Mickey retorted with a tiny pout. Carol chuckled as she walked back over, overhearing the boys conversation as she put down the first aid kit. Opening it up and pulling out some bandages and cleaning alcohol.

Silence over fell the room as Leonard and Carol began to patch up the other two with gunshot wounds.

“So, do I get names for you three or is that confidential?” Carol lightly jokes as finished cleaning Danny’s wound.

“Mickey!”

“Danny.”

“Leonard, and you?”

“I’m Carol, so what’s three boys like you running away from the police for?”

Silence again, the three glancing at each other. Carol picks up on the unexpected tension from the question and sighs.

“You don’t have to tell, forgive me. I grew up in the south and being noisy is a way of life there. Sometimes I forget big cities like this don’t like people who ask to many questions,” She rambles a bit, trying to put the boys at ease. It seems to work as Leonard let’s out a small breath of relief. Finishing up on bandaging both Mickey’s wounds.

“So then why’d you move here instead of staying south?” Mickey asked earning a light wack from Leonard. Getting a tiny “Hey!” from the eel Yokai.

“We shouldn’t be askin’ about her life when she’s not askin’ about ours,” Leonard crossed his arms like a parent scolding a child. Something he often had to do with Mickey, who had no sense of boundaries or when something was inappropriate to ask. It was about the respect of privacy.

Carol gave a light chuckle as she finished wrapping up Danny’s arm.

“No, I don’t mind! Call me an open book if you will, now why don’t you kids stay for a little while and have some cookies,” Carol offered, before Danny could reject for the group. His own stomach rumbled, than Leonard’s followed suit.

Carol chuckled at the response “I’ll take that as a yes, come on, I have a fresh batch in the back just from yesterday.” Carol lead them past the counter, the displays empty today. As she hadn’t opened up the shop yet.

Mickey took a glance around, stopping at three pictures.

One was of Carol standing with two beautiful women, one Asian and the other Indian, holding up a small Asian baby with joy. Standing as close to each other as possible. All joyously coddling the baby in the center.

The other was of a black man and a Hispanic woman with Carol in the center. Holding up a baby equally as prideful as the other picture. The two held their arms around her as the grinned at the camera.

The third was of both families with Carol, looping arms with the Asian woman and the black man. Two girls, looking around ten or eleven, sat in front of them, one Asian and the other clearly mixed. The Indian woman hung off the Asian woman, with a gentle hand on the Asian girl in front of them. The Hispanic woman was standing, clearly pregnant with a hand on the black man.

“Who’re they?” Mickey asks Carol, who’s handing out peanut butter cookies to the other two. Who are eating them like it’s their last meal they’ll ever have. Carol walks over and offers a cookie before looking at the photo’s with a smile.

“Ah, that’s my daughter, Evelyn. And her wife, Anika,” she points to the Asian woman “And that’s my son, Dajuan, and his wife Daniela. Those are their kids, Dakota and Valeria respectively.” Carol explains point to each person in the picture.

“Daniela is pregnant with twins we just found out! Due sometime next month,” Carol adds with a glowing smile, Dan and Leonard walking over in curiosity.

“Okay but they don’t look anything like you,” Dan states getting an elbow from Leonard, who shoots him a glare. Dan stares back, come on! Most of the time humans look similar to each other when they’re related!

“Ah, that’s because Evelyn and Dajuan were adopted. Dajuan’s the oldest by a couple years. I adopted him when he was twelve and when Evelyn was ten,” Carol let’s out a small sigh at the memory.

“It wasn’t easy, but eventually the three of us became an inseparable family.” She add as Mickey takes another cookie off her plate. She looks to Danny with a fond smile.

“You act a lot like my boy. Very wary of everyone ya meet, but once you get to know him. You’ve got someone on your side through hell and back.” She hums looking back to the pictures. Danny down at his cookies with a small smile on his face, man she hit ‘em in the soft spot.

“Of course, you’re just like my Evelyn,” Carol says looking to Mickey, who immediately lights up “always curious, always willing to go where ever the wind takes you. But when she sees something or someone she grows close to, she will drop anything to help you.” Carol looks back at the picture and smiles again before sighing.

“Alright you three, best you get home. I have customers due soon and I need to get ready, plus I don’t think other human’s will take so kindly to three Yokai in my kitchen,” she jokes shooing them out through the back door.

They all say a quick, oddly heartfelt, goodbye to Carol. Who directs them to a portal just down the next alleyway that’s far from any police down in the Hidden City. The boy’s have more questions, but as the bell dings in the front, signaling a customer. They part ways.

Heading to one of their three bases to lay low until the police are off their trail.

[The only thing I hate about writing mini-fics is that I NEVER know how to end them, so I hope you liked it! I also hope it’s okay how I made Carol. I just got a whole flood of ideas for while writing this so I had to add them. I hope no one seem ooc, since we don’t see much of the Mud Dogs it’s kinda hard to create pin their personalities ya know? But I hope you guys like it as much as I had fun writing it!!]

[filmstruck]

BALL OF FIRE (’41): A Barrel of Fun by Susan Doll

According to film historians Gerald Mast and Wes Gehring, Howard Hawks is the quintessential director of screwball comedy. This opinion can be backed up with facts and films, but I am always caught off guard by this assertion. When I hear the name Howard Hawks, I think of his rousing adventure-driven stories in which men bond because of a devotion to their profession or because they are caught up in adversity. In these stories men are men, and women are. . . well, also like men. That is, they are beautiful, tough-talking dames who have no problems fitting in with the male group. And yet, Hawks directed more screwball comedies than any other Golden Age director.

FilmStruck celebrates Hawks’s contributions to this much beloved subgenre by offering four titles, including his first, TWENTIETH CENTURY, which was released in 1934, the same year screwball was jump-started by Capra’s IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT. Thirty years later, and long after this subgenre had waned, Hawks directed MAN’S FAVORITE SPORT? (’64), a loose fit into screwball but a logical one. MAN’S FAVORITE SPORT? is not available on FilmStruck, but the director’s most celebrated screwball comedies, BRINGING UP BABY (’38) and HIS GIRL FRIDAY (’40), are part of the tribute.

My favorite on the list is BALL OF FIRE (’41), starring Barbara Stanwyck and Gary Cooper as Hawks’ standard archetypes for screwball. Cooper plays absent-minded professor Bertram Potts and Stanwyck costars as burlesque dancer Sugarpuss O’Shea, who bowls over “Pottsie” with her feminine charms. The dotty professor archetype figures prominently in screwball comedies in general. Cary Grant played professors twice for Hawks in BRINGING UP BABY and MONKEY BUSINESS (’52). Henry Fonda offered his interpretation in Preston Sturges’s THE LADY EVE (’41). Even Rock Hudson, who stars in MAN’S FAVORITE SPORT?, is a learned writer and scholar rather than the sportsman the other characters assume him to be.

BALL OF FIRE wins the award for the eccentricities of absent-minded professors. Not only is the male lead an eccentric scholar but his seven associates are equally as quirky. The group lives and works together in a kind of think tank, compiling an encyclopedia of all human knowledge. The contribution of Professor Potts, a grammarian, is to include contemporary slang. While gathering research in a nightclub, he meets Sugarpuss O’Shea, who is not impressed until she needs a safe place to hide from the cops. Her gangster beau, Joe Lilac (Dana Andrews), is on the lam, and she decides to hide out with the professors. The culture clash between low-brow but hip Sugarpuss and the out-of-touch professors drives the humor. In Hawks’s dramas, war films and adventure stories, the female lead is like one of the guys; in his comedies, she overwhelms or confounds the protagonist with her female identity, especially professorial types who tend to be naïve, even child-like. As the housekeeper says of Sugarpuss in BALL OF FIRE, “That is the kind of woman that makes whole civilizations topple!”

One of the reasons that I enjoy BALL OF FIRE so much is the screenplay by Billy Wilder and Charles Brackett, which explores and exploits language. Several of the character names verge on the outrageous. Aside from Sugarpuss O’Shea, Cooper’s nickname is Pottsie, Dana Andrews plays Joe Lilac, who depends on henchmen Duke Pastrami (Dan Duryea) and Asthma Anderson (Ralph Peters). Given the colorful names of the gangsters, the professors’ monikers don’t quite live up to their potential, though there is a Professor Oddley and a Professor Magenbruch, which is German for “stomach rupture,” or “stomach ache.” But, Wilder and Brackett have the most fun with the slang of the era. As Pottsie collects words and phrases for his project, the audience learns along with him as he jots down “oolie droolie” and “solid sender.” The local garbage man fires off phrases like “a mouse with a pair of gams,” “smackaroos,” and “quizola.” Sugarpuss adroitly explains the differences between “corn” and “baloney,” and when she arrives late for a meeting with the professors, she declares, “Don't tell me the jive session has beat off without baby!” And, you can probably guess what happens when she shows Pottsie the meaning of “yum yum.” My favorite is the word for the telephone, which is the “Ameche,” because Don Ameche played Alexander Graham Bell in the Hollywood biopic.

The last example displays the in-house Hollywood jokes in BALL OF FIRE. The film playfully references movies that would have been familiar to audiences of the day, though lost to many of us now—like “the Ameche.” Pottsie aside, there are seven professors who are enamored with Miss O’Shea, suggesting SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS (’37). While the fairy tale exists beyond the boundaries of Hollywood, a marquee with the title of Walt Disney’s animated version looms in the background of the scene in which Professor Potts gathers research in the streets of New York. Elsewhere, Dan Duryea, who plays henchman Duke Pastrami, holds the professors hostage in their library. He begins shooting at random artifacts in the room, noting, “I saw me a picture last week.” He licks his thumb and rubs it on the sight of his gun, an in-joke about Cooper’s previous film, SERGEANT YORK (’41), in which sharpshooter York uses this technique. For those with good visual memories, the painted portrait of the professors’ benefactor—a white-haired, crossed-eyed gent named Mr. Totten—is the same portrait found in the home of Fred MacMurray’s aunts in REMEMBER THE NIGHT (’40), Stanwyck’s Christmas movie from the previous year.

BALL OF FIRE was one of four films Howard Hawks directed for Samuel Goldwyn, which was not a happy union. Seven years after BALL OF FIRE, Goldwyn forced Hawks to direct a musical remake titled A SONG IS BORN as a vehicle for Danny Kaye. Goldwyn pushed actress Virginia Mayo onto Hawks to star in the Stanwyck role, which the director resented. Mayo was just not Hawks’s kind of woman. In interviews at the end of his career, the director dismissed the film. But, A SONG IS BORN is not a screwball comedy, so it lacks the clever conventions of that genre. Instead of general knowledge, the focus of the professors’ work is subgenres of popular music. Renown big-band leaders and jazz musicians pop up in the film, including Benny Goodman, Louis Armstrong, Lionel Hampton, Charlie Barnet, the Samba Kings, the Page Cavanaugh Trio and others. In that way, the remake is a reflection of postwar America, just as the slang makes BALL OF FIRE a sign of its time.

NOTE: It is with some sadness that I announce that this as my last post. I have been proud to write for StreamLine, and before that the Movie Morlocks, for almost a decade. It is time to move on to other projects and endeavors. I will continue to read the work of the other StreamLine bloggers, because they are a knowledgeable, talented group of writers. As the saying goes, all good things. . . .

[monotype-on-phantom]

Ah, I’ve been waiting for this moment since I started this blog. After all this time, I’m going to talk about a fascinating TUE exclusive character. One who’s both tragic yet disturbing in his very existence. One who could’ve so easily been the future of our beloved protagonist.

The traumatized, psychological mess that is…

This kid:

Did...anyone actually believe I was talking about Dan? I won’t be surprised if nobody fell for that. I have mentioned in the past that I find TUE Fenton fascinating, and the recurring word in those screenshots is “human.”

Still, with the number of fans Dan has, I couldn’t exactly resist the opportunity to try a trick like this. It is strange that I’m talking about the character who appeared on screen for like a second before the main antagonist.

I debated whether or not to cover Dan first, because really, I can’t talk about either half without talking about the other. Unlike Identity Crisis, though, this situation is complicated and talking about both in one post would go way too long.

So, I’ll just do my best to cover each half individually.

I’d recommend reading my Identity Crisis analysis in order to fully understand this post, but if you don’t want to read through the whole thing, I’ll give you a summary.

The conclusion I came to is that when Danny splits himself in half, the result is the two halves becoming the extreme of his intentions for them. Ghosts need some sort of consciousness to exist, or they’re just puddles of ectoplasm. In order to maintain itself, Danny’s ghost half has to take half of Danny’s consciousness with it. What it takes is up to Danny, though. Just like any other ghost’s consciousness is formed around their obsession (the thing keeping them from moving on when they died), Danny’s ghost half will take what Danny wants it to, allowing his human half to play out the other intended role.

The events of Identity Crisis were probably what made Danny aware of this fact. The fact that he’s half ghost allows him to remove parts of his personality simply by splitting the two parts in half.

Moving in with Vlad was probably the worst possible thing for him in this situation, because this couldn’t happen anywhere else. Vlad’s the only human left in the world who knows his secret, and he’s more than a little messed up himself. On top of that, living with Vlad, Danny was probably allowed to do whatever he wanted. Vlad’s rich ass can pay for cleaners, so Danny probably had no chores. I doubt he’d make Danny go to school or anything, and fighting ghosts was something Danny made himself do.

With nothing to occupy his time or mind, Danny would only have to sit and sulk day in and day out, which would only make him more miserable and depressed. There’d be nothing to help him cope and nobody for him to talk to. Just sitting all day feeling sorry for himself and missing his family. It makes sense that he’d start thinking that essentially surgically removing his emotions would be the only way to stop the hurting, and Vlad’s probably the only person in the world who would agree when the child under his care asked him to do that.

While we’re never told the details of how this was supposed to work, the wording “human emotions” and “rip out my humanity” implies that the emotions were intended to be left with the human half. Perhaps they were planning on keeping the human half comatose or something, or hell, maybe Danny secretly planned to off himself from the start. We don’t know, but the only conclusion I can come to is that Danny planned on living as a ghost, leaving all his baggage behind in his human body.

All things considered, it’s probably a good thing that human half didn’t exist for long. If the ghost half was going to be the extreme of lacking “painful human emotions,” then the human half would be the extreme of nothing but that. He’d lose any ability to feel apathetic or, possibly, even mild emotions. Danny’s already a child who cares too much, and this would only make things worse for him. He’d be left with nothing but amplified, painful emotions. Guilt, grief, sadness, loneliness, anger, and even the emotions that made him care about his loved ones in the first place.

He’d be a mess, and it wouldn’t be too long before he either completely lost his mind and made himself unbelievably ill.

Of course, that doesn’t mean his death was pleasant, either.

We don’t know exactly what happened to him. There are only two individuals in this timeline who know, and they’re not talking. Dan, despite usually loving to brag about the horrible things he’s done and plans on doing, just leaves this at “I surrendered my human half.” And Vlad? He visibly cringes upon being asked.

It’s worth noting that when he talks about Maddie’s death, he does so with ease. Everything up to that point wasn’t a problem for him. This, however? He turns away and says “some things are better left unsaid.” Not “I don’t want to talk about it.” The words he used were “better left unsaid.”

Why couldn’t he just say “he was killed”? If Vlad’s been able to tell Danny everything up to this point, even talking about everyone Danny loved dying and the pain he felt as a result of that, why is that sentence so hard to say?

It could be that the writers just wanted to leave things ambiguous, but the only explanation for all of this I can think of is that, for whatever reason, Vlad’s unable to leave it at that or he’s unable to bring himself to think about it.

Whatever Dan did to his human half, it was horrible enough to actually traumatize Vlad Masters. And horrible enough that Dan won’t even talk about it (whether it’s because it’s something he considers a good memory that nobody else deserves or because it’s the one time where he went too far even for himself is up for debate).

I wonder a lot about this human half of Danny. What would he have been like had he survived? Did he have a funeral? Was there, perhaps, a reason he couldn’t? What would he be like if he somehow came back as a ghost, perhaps unable to move on without the other half he’s likely terrified of at this point? If he did come back as a ghost, what would a reunion between him and any of his loved ones be like? Dan mentioned that it would’ve been very touching if he had any humanity left, so what would the other extreme look like? Or would he even be able to remember them any more behind everything else that made up who he was?

This is why I find him so fascinating, despite the fact that he only appeared onscreen for maybe 2 seconds. To me, there are more “what ifs” and other questions here than there are with any other character in TUE.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch an episode of My Little Pony or something to make myself feel better, despite pretty much never watching it in the past aside from with my baby cousin and a couple times out of curiosity. I am depressed.

[littlellamalittlelion]

My Little Baby Llama - Part 12

N/A: I’m sorry it took too long. I’ve just graduated and I was trying to get into grad school, what I did, and now I have a couple of weeks to dedicate to my writing and the phandom again! I’ve missed you guys. 

For those of you that might be a bit confused, this fic is happening around the end of January/2016. Before the tour dates release.

Words: 3000+

Disclaimer: Nor Dan or Phil belongs to me, and while I wish I had a Lizzie in real life, I do not have one either.

Masterpost

Phil's POV

No, no, no. This can't be happening on the only day that Dan is alone in the house with Lizzie. The only day that I'm not there to help, to secure him that everything is going to be okay and that he doesn't need to panic. I'm panicking. I need to go home and there is no train that leaves now. I need a car but I haven't been driving for the past 10 years. I call my mom for help and she joins me in the room, trying to calm me down.

"Have you tried calling him?" She asks.

"Yes! He is not answering his phone or the house line. I have to go back home." I start packing my things and run around the room. My mom holds me in place and tries to calm me down.

"How do you plan on going home? There are no trains leaving now. It's past 11pm Phil, you should try to sleep and wait until the morning. It's your birthday in just a few minutes, we can celebrate tonight and in the morning you catch the first train."

"Mom, I'm sorry but I don't feel like celebrating tonight, okay? I just wanna go home and make sure Danny is okay." I don't want to sound rude, so I give her a little smile and continue packing. I have an idea. "Can you call Martyn for me please? Probably he is still awake. I'll see if he can drive me back to London tonight."

"I'm ready. Cornelia is finishing grabbing her stuff. We just saw it all over twitter, there is no way we would let Dan pass thru this alone." Martyn said joining us in the room. "I'll load your bags in the car if you are done packing. Try calling Dan again, or anyone that could get there before us. I don’t think he should be alone for the hours we’ll take to get there.” He grabbed my bags and left the room before I could thank him or say anything else. I tried calling Dan again, no answer. I trow the phone on the bed.

“I should go with you then. To check on Lizzie, make sure my boys will be okay.” Mom said, holding my arm.

"No mom. Dan is probably going crazy right now. The last thing he needs is a crowded house and people around him. He needs space and time, and he needs not to be worried about anything right now so he can figure out what to do next." I try to explain without being rude.

"How do you know so well what he needs?"

"We've been living together for years, we've been friends for way longer than that. Dan and I, we have a deep connection. Trust me mom, I know what he needs right now, and it's me back in our home, taking care of our little girl, while he takes a time for himself." I turn to leave the room, but I go back to hug her. "I'm sorry this messed up our family weekend and the birthday party you were throwing me. I love you mom, I'll call once we figure things out." I leave and Martyn meets us downstairs. Everything is happening too fast, I almost forget to say goodbye to my father before getting into the car and driving out of the garage. Just hang in there Dan, I'm coming.

Dan's POV

For those of you who have never passed out in your life before, I have something to tell you. Different from what some of you may think, when you pass out, your vision doesn't just get dark, like closing your eyes. When you pass out you feel your head getting lighter, and you start to see little glittery and blackish spots appearing all around you, and when they multiply enough they just cover your whole vision. Also, there are a few levels of how passed out you can be too. You might completely blackout. You can just go off for a few seconds and come back. Or you can loose all of your vision, loose your sense of life, but still be able to hear things around you, as if you were underwater. As scary as the first two might sound, nothing is worse than this last one. You can hear life passing around you, but you just aren't able to be a part of it. You can't speak to tell people that you are okay, but you can hear their despair and the things that are happening. It feels like you are a blind ghost. You can’t see shit, you can’t interact, but you are scaring people around. This is how I felt at the moment I realized that everyone knew about Lizzie, but I was a lonely ghost, with no one around to be afraid or worried about me.

My brain tries to find something to hold on to, but all I can find is the memories from Clary's funeral. I need someone to wake me up and tell me that things will be alright, I need Phil. I feel my phone buzzing in my pocket, I hear the house line going insane, but I'm floating in darkness, with nothing I can do to turn the lights on. And then I blackout.

"Daddy! Wake up daddy I'm scared!" I hear a little voice far away in my brain, crying. I start to feel things. First I feel Lizzie's cold little hands in my face. I focus in my arms, to regain control of them so I can hold her. I open my eyes, and in a few seconds I'm able to see again. Light is coming back to me, as all of my senses are. I know Lizzie is crying when I feel the tears in my shirt. I get up as fast as my body allows me, and I hold her tight. "I... I thought you went to live in heaven with mommy." Cried my four years old, holding her little hands in my shirt.

"No baby llama, of course not! I told you that I'm not going to leave you anytime soon." I try holding my tears, until she calms down. My phone starts ringing again, but I don’t feel like answering it. All that I can think about is where in the world I could run to, that people wouldn’t bother us, where Lizzie could grow up as a normal child, with no fans around to destroy her childhood. Maybe Alaska. Or Greenland. I should pack some winter clothes.

“Your phone is ringing daddy.” Lizzie says after the fourth time - in 2 minutes - that my phone started buzzing. I think about telling her that I give no fucks for my phone right now, but I decide not to do that. And then I remember: Phil. Phil isn’t home. Phil might have seen what happened, I need to talk to Phil.

I grab the cellphone in my pocket, and I have tons of missed calls, most of them from the one and only Phil Lester. I’m typing his number to call him back, and the phone buzzes again, his picture in my screen.

“Phil.” I answer. My voice breaks in the minute I hear his breathing, and then I’m crying. I’m crying everything that I haven’t since the picture leaked. I try to hear him, but I can’t hear a single thing over my sobbing. I know that Lizzie is still holding on to me, sat on the floor by my side, but I can’t hear her either. It takes me a few minutes before I’m calm enough to talk.

“I’m so sorry Dan. I’m really sorry. I wish I was there. Martyn is taking me home, I’ll be there soon enough.” He is saying, and I try to focus on it. “Don’t go online. Don’t take any other phone calls, don’t try to fix it. We will work things out together.” He is trying to take the control, so I don’t feel overwhelmed. But I’ve made my mind already.

“I think I’ll move to Greenland.” I say, and he is quiet on the other side of the line. “You don’t need to come. I know you don’t want to move far from your family, but I need to take Lizzie out of this madness. We will live in a cabin and she will grow up with polar bears. Safer than the fans.” I  burst out. He is speechless. Lizzie is holding me tight, just paying attention on what I’m saying, almost sleeping.

“Dan, I think we can talk about that once I get home, okay? No rushed decisions, we will discuss everything we can do, and after that if you still want to move to Greenland, we will discuss the moving plans. But don’t go around packing bags.” He is calmer than I think it is possible for someone to be in this situation.

“You don’t understand Phil. She can’t go to school here, there will always be one or two people that won’t respect our wishes and will follow her to her class. There will be phans trying to work at her school to be around her without saying that this is what they are doing. There will be phans trying to find out her entire past and phans making shifts around Clary’s grave waiting the day that we will visit her. They don’t know the meaning of the word “limits”. There will be no peace. I can’t make her grow up in this madness.” I make a pause and then I continue making my case. “We are used to bumping into fans in the streets that claims that they were just “passing thru the neighborhood” but we both know that they have being walking in circles around our block just to meet us once we leave the flat. We are used to screams, we are used to privacy invasion. We are used to pretend that we don’t care about what they say about us. But I don’t want Lizzie to get used to any of this.”

“I do understand Dan, and I agree with you, I don’t think that she should grow up in any of these situations. But Greenland is a bit excessive. We can think of better solutions, Martyn is saying that he can help us with that if we need. We can move flats, we will find something. Please don’t go to extremes right now.” He is worried about me. He doesn’t understand.

“We can talk when you get home.” I cut the conversation, because I don’t wanna fight him. “How long until you get here?”

“Two hours, maybe a bit more, Martyn isn’t running that much, now that you answered the phone.”

“Please be careful.” I ask, and he knows what I mean. I don’t think I can deal with another accident in my life time.

“Don’t worry, Martyn is a great driver. I’ll be home safe in a while.”

“Please do. I don’t wanna be alone right now.” I open my heart to him. I’m not alone, since Lizzie is sleeping in my arms, but I need him, and he gets it, he knows it.

“You won’t. You should go take a bath. Have you eaten anything in the past 4 hours?” I deny with my head, even though he cant see it, figures it out by my silence. “Go make us some really late diner, to take your head out of things, I’m hungry and technically it’s my birthday already, so I deserve some homemade food.”

“Happy Birthday Phil.” I say, trying to sound excited, but I’m not that good of an actor. He can see that too.

“It won’t be a happy day until I know that we all are gonna be fine.” He answers, but he thanked me anyway. “I’ll turn the phone off, so you can take a relaxing bath and start diner. I’ll be there before you can say “diner is ready”.” He laughs, taking a smile from me.

“See you soon.”

“I want cake.” Thats all he says before turning the phone off. I have a sleepy Lizzie in my arms, sat on the floor, and I have no idea of what to cook or if I have enough things to make a cake. I make a schedule in my brain, trying to fit everything into three hours. First I’ll put my daughter back on our bed, than I’ll make the cake, and while it bakes I’ll take a bath. Then I’ll start diner, maybe a salad and some grilled chicken. If I’m correct, I’ll have just enough time to finish everything and decorate the cake, so we can have a 4am diner. Late diner it is.

I start my plan, leaving Lizzie with the bedroom door open, and I move to the kitchen with my computer so I can youtube search a cake recipe. It isn’t until, I start grilling the chicken, after the whole bath and cake thing, that I notice what Phil had done. He took my mind completely out of the crazy mess it was. That son of a bitch.  

Phil’s POV

“I’ll call you later, okay? I’ll let you know what the plan is once we figure it out. I have to go.” I tell Martyn before leaving his car and sprinting to my flat.

The stairs never felt so high in my life. I ran over them, expecting to find a existencial crisis Dan, in the middle of the hall. But what I found was as far from that as possible. Daniel James Howell was dancing around the kitchen, decorating a birthday cake, at 3am. He didn’t notice my presence until he turned around and saw me standing in front of the kitchen door. We didn’t say a thing, we just stared at each other, happy to be finally together to stand against all the things trying to destroy our little family.

The grill biped making us both jump. Dan laughed, turned around to get us whatever he was cooking, and placed on the counter.

“Dinner is ready.” He said.

“Told ya i would be here before you could say that.”

“Well, I could have said it earlier, I just waited for you.”

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t, I just baked you a birthday cake from things I’ve found around the kitchen. You love me.”

“Since you’ve started in this subject, am I gonna get a birthday hug or you are going to continue there starring at me? You know, I’ve just skipped my birthday party for you, I should at least get a hug.”

Dan walked in my direction and placed his arms around my body. I knew this was supposed to be my birthday hug, but it didn’t feel like that. I confirmed that as I felt his tears making a wet spot in my shoulder. He didn’t deserve that. All the worries, all the craziness. He always gave all of him to make sure everything was fine, there’s no way that he was one to deserve all the problems he was dealing with right now. I wanted to put him in a little jar and keep him safe from all the world problems.

“I’ve decided what I wanna do.” Dan said, after a few minutes.

“And what are we going to do?”

“We are going to run away to Brazil.”

“We’ve been over this already. Greenland, Brazil, Madagascar, this is all a bit excessive. We can deal with things without having to move to another time zone.”

“Where did Madagascar come from?” He left my embrace to look at my face.

“Well, Brazil isn’t a good idea, too much people. If you want a tropical remote place, we should move to Madagascar. But that’s not the point. We are not moving. We shouldn’t have to run away and change our whole lives because some people don’t know the meaning of ‘privacy’.” I let him go, and start making a plate with the diner he prepared for us. “We’ll have diner, I’ll take a shower, we’ll go to bed and sleep, and in the morning, we will decide what to do. If you wanna leave London a bit, to get some clean thoughts and try to run away from social media, great. We will find a place in the UK to go, because Lizzie still doesn’t have a passport. But we are not going to rush things, okay?”

“Okay.” He agrees with me, grabbing a serving of the grilled chicken too. “Can we watch some Attack on Titan while we eat? I need some blood and destruction to get my head out of things.”

“Go put it on, I’ll put my bag in my room and I’ll be right back.” I leave my plate on the table in the lounge, put my things in my room, and check on Lizzie, before going back to Dan in the sofa, waiting for me. “Just one episode because it is really late already, and I do need some sleep.”

“You’re gonna watch one. I’ll need at least two more to fill in the time you are gonna be in the shower for.” He teases me.

“I’m too tired to stay there for more than 5 minutes. I wouldn’t take a shower if I wasn’t really needing one.”

We eat, finish the episode, and I go take a shower while Dan stays in his sofa crease, watch more Attack on Titan. I only take 15 minutes in the shower, but I decide to do the dishes before returning to Dan. It’s almost 5am when we move to my bed and decide to lay down.

“How’s Lizzie doing?” I ask, trying to make some conversation.

“She’s fine. I don’t think she has any idea of the shitstorm happening right now. I wish I could keep her like that forever.” I take a few minutes thinking, before saying what is actually going on in my mind. We are laying down facing each other, and he is so much calmer than he was before, so I think it’s a good time to raise my hypothesis in all of this mess.

“Have you ever considered the fact that this isn’t a big deal at all?”

“What?” He sits on the bed.

“Please don’t freak out. Just think about it for a second. How much easier it’s going to be your life now. We can go out with Lizzie without worrying about anyone finding out about her. She won’t have a normal life, but being locked in a house isn’t a normal life either. Once all this fire extinguishes, no one will care about who she is and why she is here. I think we should just come out and tell them your story, and everything will be alright eventually.” I try to reason with him, but it doesn’t go well.

“I can’t even believe that you are saying that. I…. Goodnight Phil.” Dan got out of the bed, and left the room, smashing the door closed. Well, I think I fucked up.

Part 13