#DOES BESTIE KNOW??? BESTIE DID I EVER MENTION WHO POCKETS PARENTS WERE????

[socksandbuttons]

Eventually ill remember to share my traditional doodles from my sketchbook again cause um

I just wfound the cutest lunar in there

[roniscloud]

psh - love affair

park sunghoon [f. 8516 words] love affair

so when i’m gonna know what to feel inside, baby?

maybe it’s just all in my head, so

don’t overthink, this is love

maybe it’s just a crush

baby, is this your love affair, your love affair?

synopsis: what happens when two childhood best friends make a deal to help each other’s reputations? an unforeseen circumstance prompts sunghoon to approach you, intriguing not just you but practically every other student at your college. you believe your reunion with him can only end in one of two ways: you resort back to being friends and go on with your lives, or you use each other and once you’re both done, you fall out and never talk again. how will you two navigate your companionship? is it just the nostalgia coming up? a revival of feelings? a new crush? could it possibly be actual love?

genre + tropes : fluff. comedy. the slightest angst. childhoodbestfriends!au. enemiestolovers!au. college!au. fakedating!au. 

warnings: fem reader. a little swearing. slightly suggestive themes, sorta. a few cliches. mentions of underage drinking. the american collegiate school calendar. does them geeking out over fantasy/sci-fi sagas need a warning? unknown mutual pining. they’re so helplessly clueless of their feelings. also appearances of the rest of enha plus txt.

i. prologue

if someone told you that you would reconnect with your childhood best friend—let alone date him, you would’ve laughed in their face and told them to fuck off. park sunghoon is bad news. well, at least to you he is. one of the infamous campus playboys, you can spot him around the quad flirting with a different girl practically every day. 

but to you, he couldn’t have been anymore unlike the sunghoon you grew up with. you grew up with the sunghoon who couldn’t stand being around others, mind always focused on his own interests. you knew him as the little shy boy who would hide behind his mom whenever new people came around. the first person he opened up to was you. you can blame your mom for that. you can vaguely remember her words, something along the lines of mrs. park and i have been friends for longer than you have been alive. when we found out we were both expecting, we knew you two were destined to be besties. 

she was right. everyone thought you were two peas in a pod. wherever one of you went, the other followed. always stuck together, like true partners in crime. your close bond stuck for years. if anyone needed you, you’d most likely be found in the seats of sunghoon’s ice skating practices and competitions, cheering him on and being obnoxiously loud. likewise, he always attended your showcases, spending hours complimenting your artwork.

but then the villain of everyone’s lifetime eventually appeared. puberty. 

alas, your friendship did what anyone could predict of a couple of preteens entering high school. the usual “no matter what we’re gonna stick together!” leading to “sorry for blowing you off, got really busy,” to the imminent “what happened to us? we used to be so close,” and eventually the end of it all. senior year, the two of you attempted to leave on a good note. by that, you mean your parents made both of you apply to the same colleges to have a chance at sticking together. well, it worked, you got into the same university. funny how the universe does things.

back to present day, you’re now in your second year at hybe university. let’s just say, sunghoon isn’t the only one who went through a personality change. sunghoon traded his late night practices on the ice to one-night stands at frat parties. you, on the other hand, traded your once outgoing and fun-loving persona for a more… cold grunge meets artsy introvert. overall, let’s just say you both have reputations for not being the most approachable people. well at least you still have one thing in common.

ii. the cafe

the busy campus cafe was roaring with study groups filling every table. the aroma of fresh coffee and tea being brewed filling the air, creating a warm atmosphere—contrast to the cold winter weather just outside the walls. the college students scattered around, just like their minds scattered as they prepare for finals. not immune to the dreaded time of year, a group of four boys enter, immediately grabbing the attention of those already nestled inside.

a quick roll call of the four known by the student body as en-4, a combination of the dance crew name enhypen and the notorious f4. lee heeseung—the campus heartthrob, captain of the dance crew, center of the basketball team, and an unknown hopeless romantic. park jongseong, although everyone calls him jay—the resident bad boy and party animal, but those close to him know that he’s actually the responsible one. sim jaeyun, otherwise referred to as jake—the friendly and flirty frat boy who you can catch playing soccer in the quad almost every day. finally, park sunghoon—the handsome heartbreaker. he doesn’t need more of an introduction.

the four of them make their way to the counter, placing their orders. of course jake doesn’t miss his chance to sound extra sweet and send a quick wink to the barista, getting elbowed by heeseung in the process. after getting their drinks, they look around to see almost no where to sit. not a single table to fit all of them was available. 

in one of the tucked away areas, sunghoon spots an empty seat at a smaller table. the only catch was there was someone sitting across from it, hunched forward over her laptop. he can’t see much of her figure but he immediately recognizes her features. it’s you. well, a more mature and grown up you, but he couldn’t forget that face for the life of him.

sunghoon’s feet drag himself across the crowded room, catching the attention from the neighboring groups he passed but sneaking away quiet enough to not alarm his own friends. the three are too caught up arguing about what to do. sunghoon can hear the faint voice of jay suggesting going somewhere else while the other two shoot him down as he walks further away. he makes his way all the way up to your side. you look up, scanning him, confused but unamused. “this seat taken?” the first words he said in a year and half to you. still not not giving him any emotion, you hesitantly shake your head once, immediately bringing your focus back to your essay.

ignoring him only works for so long, his gaze not leaving the top of your head. you can feel his stare piercing into you, finally meeting his eyes. “what’s your deal?” the irritation and bluntness in your tone is all too evident.

he shrugs and answers nonchalantly, “nothing, just go along with it.” his answer is hushed, almost as if he’s a bit embarrassed.

“what are you trying to pull here, park?”

“can i not just sit here and peacefully drink my latte? am i that disturbing to you?”

“considering that the second you started walking in this direction, everyone had their eyes on us, then yes, you are that disturbing.”

“they’re not looking at us.” he pauses before continuing with his rant, “they’re looking at you.”

“and why the hell do you think that is?”

“they’re all trying to figure out what could possibly be so interesting about you that i would choose this seat.” he says it like it’s the most obvious answer.

you scoff and turn to see the lingering stares of the others in the cafe. “well, if it isn’t the god park sunghoon being as humble as ever, gracing me with his presence and having mercy on a peasant like me.” the sarcasm dripping off your tongue like venom.

he smiles warmly at your animosity and chuckles. “i’ve always loved your sense of humor.”

“funny cause i’ve always despised yours. i’m gonna ask one more time. what do you want, park?”

he only shrugs. hesitating before responding again, “i like it here. i like talking to you. it’s familiar… comfortable.” he sees your expression change subtly. it’s only for a second before you regain the prior look. he tries to read you. he caught you off guard and his pride brings a smirk to his face. 

by now, he finally tunes back into the situation around him and can feel his phone going off in his jean pocket. he pulls out the phone to see dozens of notifications, quickly stealing a glance back up at you to see that you’re already back to typing away on the previously forgotten assignment. he laughs as he sees the boys blowing up their group chat asking what he was doing. he looks up, finding the three sitting at a cramped booth with shock and confusion written all over them.

“enjoying the attention?” your turn to break the silence. when he turns back to you, you continue, “you’re no stranger to it but you’ve always loved it.” he gives you a slow nod, turning the question back to you. you answer him, “you know that it’s not my forte.”

“and why is that? scared people will get to know the real you?”

“oh please, like you aren’t afraid of me exposing all the dirt i have on you. imagine the buzz i could create with all of your old baby pics.”

he jolts up from his relaxed position, eyebrows raised, and completely on edge, “you wouldn’t dare.”

you lean forward in your seat, elbow resting on the table, cheek resting in your palm, and chuckle, “try me.” the words leaving your mouth quickly and a smile immediately replacing it.

“you’re finally smiling at me. good to know you still have emotions.” he gets you to laugh again. you spend the next 20 minutes catching up. looks like you two kept more in common than you thought. things run smoothly between the two of you, some of your old memories and inside jokes being brought up. “why didn’t this happen sooner?”

“what, us talking? i mean, you and i stopped running in the same crowd and school got the best of us. i will admit, though, freshman year sucked without you.”

he sighs when he hears your admission. “how about this? a proposition. i’m sure you’re aware that i don’t have the best reputation.”

you cut him off, “you can say that again.”

“haha, very funny,” he throws in another sarcastic comment. “you know you’re not exactly the most approachable either. hate to be the one to break it to you but you’re pretty intimidating.” he notices the expression on your face turned into one of annoyance at his last statement, “don’t look at me like that, you know it’s true.”

you dismiss the slight jab, telling him to continue. what you don’t expect is the next four words to come out of his mouth. “go out with me.” he sees your face drop, “oh come on, stop looking at me like that.”

“so i see, a little bit of time without me and you go insane.”

“look, i don’t mean actually date me, i mean… pretend to.”

again, you stare at him like he grew another head. “you want me to fake-date you? what are we, in a k-drama now? sorry hoon, you’re attractive but i would’ve preferred hwang in-youp or song kang.”

now he’s a bit annoyed, answering cockily, “i am so much better looking than them.”

“you wish.”

his jaw drops for a few seconds and then he chuckles. “i’m serious, think about it. we go out and spend time with each other like old times. i don’t look like i’m so incapable of being in a committed relationship and you don’t look like such a loner. no offense.”

“offense taken… but i see your point.”

“see, look at you using that smart brain of yours. this would be no strings attached. just two friends helping each other out while simultaneously deceiving everyone else. i know how much you love tricking others.”

you sit quietly, weighing the pros and cons in your head. “deal.”

iii. bro code

a few days later, sunghoon sits in his shared apartment with the boys, slumped on the couch as they eat dinner. “why are you guys so against it? i thought you wanted to see me in a relationship and now that i’m in one, you guys don’t approve. make it make sense. i should be free to date whoever i want.”

“yeah dude,” pausing to take a bite of his burger, “we get that.” jay answers, seeing how defensive his friend is getting.

jake interejects, “we respect your choices, but like… her? of all the girls that are falling at your feet, you chose her? the one that has no interest in you at all? i know you’re powerful but i don’t get how you managed to pull that off.”

“i feel like you could’ve consulted us about it first. bro code, man.” heeseung says as he shrugs his shoulders and sips on his soda.

“that’s kinda why i like her, because she isn’t all over me like the others. she’s cute and fun to hang out with. just give her a chance. honestly, what’s the worst that could happen? we go out and it doesn’t work. no harm in trying….”

that seems to do the trick as the boys lay off from the topic, going back to their own dinners and watching the latest episode of the penthouse.

later that night, sunghoon leaves their dorm to meet up with you. you agreed earlier that if you needed to meet up and talk that you’d go to the art department. perks of being an art major allows you a studio to spend your time in, secluded from the outside world. in this case, you and sunghoon don’t have to worry about nosy roommates.

when he arrives, he makes sure to take the back entrance like you mentioned. he makes his way through the deserted halls, glancing at each room he passes, and taking note of the various pieces framed along the corridor walls. he gets to the end of the building, finding a studio decorated with your name on the door. he silently enters. you don’t notice him at first with your back against the entrance and the music playing too loud through your airpods, focused on molding the clay on the pottery wheel. he grabs an empty stool, propping it beside you and taking a seat. he takes off one of your airpods, putting it in his own ear.

you finally turn your head towards him, “how long ago did you get here?”

“just now. how long were you waiting?”

you sit up, facing his direction. “i had a couple of classes today and came here to finish some stuff, been here for… what time is it?”

“um… almost 11.”

“then like four hours.”

“you’ve been working on that for four hours? what even is it, and when did you start doing pottery?” he points at the unfinished ceramic.

“not just that. i had some paintings that i needed to finish for my portfolio and those are in a separate room to dry. this,” you refer to the clay, “is just something i’m working on for fun. i got into it cause one of my profs suggested i try another medium.”

he nods along while you explain. “you can keep working on it while we talk.”

you hum in confirmation and turn back to the wheel, rewetting your wands. “so how do we make this believable? seems like people already know. word spreads quick when it comes to you.”

“we just need to act like a couple. so hanging out, going on dates, posting each other here and there, and being affectionate.”

“wow you finally found an excuse to kiss me,” you laugh as you joke with him, him following suit. “sounds reasonable, not much different from how we were as kids, just now we have to call them dates.”

“shouldn’t cause too many problems. just don’t fall in love with me, babe.”

you smile at the new nickname, “likewise, hoon.” you continue throwing the clay, molding it to your desired shape. you hyperfocus on the sculpture, tuning out the boy sitting next to you as he watches—he catches on that you still have the habit of pouting whenever you work on your art. you hunch forward, letting some of your hair fall in front of your face. too caught up, you don’t notice that sunghoon left his seat to stand behind you. he takes your locks and ties it into a messy ponytail. you snap out of your tunnel vision to ask, “why do you just have a hair tie handy?”

“i always had to carry some around for you because you always lost them. i never grew out of it, i guess.” he grins warmly, “do you remember how many times you had complained when you would get paint in your hair and i would have to clean it up for you?”

“how could i forget?” the night ends with more laughs and reminiscing on your childhood. time really does fly faster than you think.

iv. rated pg

the bell rings as you and sunghoon enter the convenience store. you two are discussing the movie you two just watched as you walk through the aisles. 

you split up agreeing to meet back at the register. you make your way to the drinks in the back while sunghoon goes to get snacks. you grab an iced jasmine tea for yourself and an iced vanilla latte for hoon. sunghoon yells over the stands as he browses, “hey, what should i caption for my insta post?”

you respond loudly, “i don’t know, something related to movies.”

sunghoon looks at the picture on his phone: a photo of you two snuggled up in the theater, most of your face hidden in his hoodie. he types in quickly “rated pg for park’s girl <3”, hits post, and goes back to browsing. he goes to grab bento boxes, honey butter chips, candy jellies, and practically everything his eyes landed on. 

when you make it to the cashier, you see sunghoon with his arms full. “you good there, park?”

a muffled “yup” is heard behind all the food.

you look around, walking away when you find what you needed. going closer to him, “why didn’t you just grab a basket?” you start to take some things from his arms, lightening his load. 

“i… uh… didn’t think of it.” he pauses in between, an embarrassed expression adorning his face. you giggle as you take everything to be rung up, missing how his ears turned red. you catch the worker’s name on his tag, jungwon. before you can take out your wallet to pay, sunghoon’s already entering his card into the machine. you whip your head around, ready to tell him off. “nope, do not look at me like that.” you roll your eyes at him as you grab the bag with what you just bought. 

“oh come on… you can’t seriously be mad at me.” no response from you. “really? the silent treatment?” he scoffs jokingly when you cross your arms against your chest. he comes closer to bend down and wrap his arms around your waist. “it’s snacks. it’s not that big of a deal.”

you release yourself from his grasp and walk out of the store, still faking being mad. you mumble, “whatever,” under your beath but still loud enough for him to hear.

he bids jungwon a quick “have a nice night”, not missing him calling the two of you a cute couple. sunghoon meets up with you outside, already sitting on the curb of the parking lot. 

v. pretty boy

the start of a new semester. en-4 are sitting out on the grass of the quad. surrounding them are various groups of students, typical for the buzzing campus on a crisp spring day.

“you need to cook the noodles first. end of discussion.” jake says sternly. he and heeseung are in a heated argument over the proper order of cooking ramen.

heeseung defends himself, “you are so wrong. you make the broth first to build the flavor.”

jay brings his attention up from his phone, “neither of you should be allowed anywhere near a kitchen.”

out of nowhere, a loud car horn is heard, drawing the attention of every student in the area. sunghoon looks up to find you leaning against the passenger door of your car and yelling, “hey, pretty boy! get in.” he chuckles at both the label and how bossy you sound, turning to his friends to grab his things. the three of them are stunned at him.

jake breaks first, “wait, what?”

heeseung lets go of his argument with the australian, “dude, are you seriously leaving?”

sunghoon only nods as he walks away, not letting them ask any more questions. he notices all the watching eyes and decides why not put on a show? he shouts out to you, “thought i was picking you up later, babe.” he makes sure to emphasize the nickname as his infamous smirk tells you exactly what his intentions are.

“lecture ended early, love. prof had some emergency. thought why not surprise you…” you wrap your arms around his shoulders as he reaches you and let him lay a quick peck on your cheek. “now come on, i’m taking you out on a date so either hop in or lose your chance. your choice but i don’t have that much patience so hurry up.”

“yes, ma’am,” he leans in closer and guides his hands lower from your waist. “but i’m driving,” he says as he sneakily takes your keys from your back pocket, 

“you sly fox.” he laughs at the new nickname as he opens the door, letting you sit down before closing it. he makes his way around the hood, noting that all attention is still on you two. he meets eyes with his friends again, the three looking much like the faces he saw in the cafe almost six weeks ago. as he buckles in and starts the car, you rest your hand on top of his on the gear shift. he raises his eyebrows and gives you a charming smile. “by the way, why’s your friend looking at me like that?”

he looks back up to face the boys, “which one?”

“jay. since we started doing this, he keeps looking at me weird—like weirder than the others.”

he tilts his head to the side when he realizes that jay is indeed looking in your direction, but his eyes are focused solely on you. “jay is… how should i put this? you know what i’ll tell you later. for now, tell me where to?”

vi. jukebox

the hazy red glow of the neon lights and checkered tiled floors welcomed you as you led sunghoon into the local diner. this place was a staple in your childhood, your go-to hangout spot with the aforementioned boy when you were still in your youth. 

“i will say, this is a nice surprise.”

you look up to sunghoon as he sits across from you in the vinyl booth seat, “i knew you would love it.” you laugh with each other as you get situated, seeing a young but tall—why is he so tall? he looks like he’s only a teenager—server coming towards your table.

“hey, i’m niki and i’ll be taking care of you guys today,” the giant says cheerfully. “anything i can start you guys with?”

sunghoon looks up at the boy to take your order swiftly, “two strawberry milkshakes, please.” you watch as niki nods and walks back to the counter.

“well, well, well, park… you remembered?” you question teasingly with a cocked eyebrow.

“you’ve always had a sweet tooth. no wonder you loved me so much,” his turn to turn up the typical park sunghoon charm.

you scrunch your face in annoyance, “you should become a comedian.”

“i will never get tired of your sarcasm. it really just… keeps me going.” his way of joking back. “stay here. i’ll be right back,” he says quickly as he looks behind you and gets out of his seat.

you wait patiently for him, assuming he’s just going to the restroom. unbeknownst to you, sunghoon is making his way to the jukebox on the other side of the restaurant. he flips through the song list, finally finding the one he wants. he quickly puts in the coins and sets it in the queue. as he turns to go back to you, he sees an engraving on the side. he runs his fingers along it as he inspects the writing. property of sunghoon and y/n. he thinks back to your last day of eighth grade when you two etched the label onto the wood. he joyfully walks back to your table, ready to let you know about the memory. he sits next to you now, resting his arm behind you and around your back,

“what took you so long, park?”

right as he’s about to explain, niki comes to your table, “two strawberry milkshakes. anything else i can get you two?”

you turn your head quickly to the boy sitting next to you, seeing his eyes are already focused on yours. “um… no, i, uh, think we’re good.” you stumble and stutter a bit. you watch him as he nods his head and walks away. regaining your composure, you ask sunghoon again, “so what did take you so long?”

once again, he gets interrupted. the sound of “purpose” by justin bieber playing over the speakers makes him stop. he gives you a second to register the song, “that’s why.”

you tilt your head down and look at him quizzically, “really? this is why?” you reach to your drink, sipping on the straw as you wait for his answer.

he mirrors your movement, nodding his head in confirmation. he too drinks from the tall glass, contrary to your use of a straw, he opts to drink straight from the rim. he pulls the milkshake away, leaving some on his upper lip.

you burst into quiet laughter, turning your gaze away to not spit out your own shake.

sunghoon furrows his eyebrows in confusion, “what’s so funny?”

you turn back to him, “you got a little something there, park.” you wipe away the liquid from his face with your thumb, popping into your own mouth to clean it up.”there, all good now.”

sunghoon freezes in his spot, trying to comprehend what just happened. it’s quick but he feels something. trying to shake off the foreign feeling, he turns to face forward again. he feels you lean into him, head resting on his chest. a small grin appears on his face, humming along to the justin bieber tune still playing.

“i missed hearing you sing.”

sunghoon looks down at the crown of your head, “really? you used to always tease me about it, though.”

you shake your head with a light laugh, “i never meant it. whenever you sang, it always calmed me. i used to think… if you didn’t pursue skating, you could’ve been a singer.”

“and then what? i would bring you around on tour everywhere and sneak you in backstage?”

“that could’ve been fun.” you now laugh louder than before, him along with you.

there it is again. sunghoon’s not sure what it is, trying to suppress the odd emotion. he sits there, cuddling up to you in the booth, finishing the strawberry milkshakes, just hoping you can’t hear the way his heart starts to beat faster.

sitting at the bar, snacking on fries, and trying to not be seen by you two are heeseung, jay, and jake. they ask themselves would they really be considered sunghoon’s friends if they didn’t follow them and stake out their date.

vii. nerds

sunghoon picked you up from the art department today. he showed up about ten minutes too early, and he got permission from your instructor to monitor your class from the back. he waited outside the door while you cleaned up, earning a few prying looks from your peers as they exited. as you drove back to his place, you agreed to have a movie marathon. 

opening the door to his dorm, you say “we are watching star wars. luke, leia, and han solo are a way better trio than three child magicians.”

sunghoon defends his choice, “first of all, they’re wizards. second, i’m offended. harry, ron, and hermione use magic with their wands. all star wars has is weird weapons and robots.”

“they’re literally in space and excuse you, but does something called—oh, i don’t know—the force ring any bells? they’re jedis, duh.” you rolls your eyes, making your annoyance clear.

sunghoon stops in the hall, “harry potter has spells and potions.”

“star wars has chewbacca.” you stand next to him with your arms crossed.

definitively and matter-of-factly, sunghoon says, “quidditch.”

“you can’t seriously believe quidditch is praiseworthy?” you look at him crazily.

“you two are such nerds.”

you both freeze, turning to see the rest of en-4 sitting in the living room. in the midst of your argument, you both failed to notice the others were home. you realize that jay was the one to stop you two. you also realize it’s the dreaded time for the best friends to finally meet the “girlfriend”. sunghoon seems to realize it as well, reaching to intertwine your hands to both sell the act to his roomates and to calm you down.

he leads you into the living room, meeting eyes with the boys. “so… guys, this is y/n, my girlfriend.”

“it’s so nice to finally meet you! i’m jake. sunghoon here has been holding out on us. i mean, come on, it’s been like two months and he still hasn’t introduced you to us.” the australian continues on with his energetic and positive ramble, asking you questions about your relationship.

heeseung butts in to tell jake to slow down. “i’m heeseung. jake’s right though, you two started dating before winter break and we’re barely meeting you now. sunghoon is always hanging out with you and telling us everything about it. honestly, all i can tell you is to run while you still can.” the others all laugh at his antics.

sunghoon scoffs, “hey, i’m not that bad.”

you excuse yourself to get a drink from the kitchen. you can hear jake spitting out more questions like rapid fire to sunghoon as you walk away. you reach into the fridge, fishing out a water bottle.

behind you, jay enters quietly. “you two are cute together.”

you flinch at his voice, “geez, dude. almost gave me a heart attack.”

he chuckles under his breath and leans against the counter, “sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. i met sunghoon at freshman orientation and we immediately became friends, but i’ve never seen him like this.”

“really hoping you mean that in a good way.”

“don’t worry, it is. you know… he only has a soft spot for you. the three of us are his best friends but he only ever smiles like that with you.” he sways his head back and forth as he rambles, taking a pause between his words. “stay with him. it’ll be good for everyone.”

you smile at his approval, “you wanna know something? he actually said you would be the hardest to win over. he said something about you being super protective over your friends… yet, at the same time you trust their judgement. he told me that when he and i got together, he wasn’t scared to tell you but more worried as to if you would like me.”

he smiles with you now, “that all he said about me?” he asks while raising his eyebrows in curiosity.

“he also mentioned that you’re a good cook.”

viii. proud

a professor of yours is holding their annual spring showcase for contemporary art. every year, a handful of students are chosen to join and display their art amongst other renowned artists. you happen to be one of the few, a top contender chosen for your abilities.

you’ve invited your friends, including en-4 to come by the studio and see your work—albeit a bit nervous for their reactions. you stand on watch by your section, greeting the patrons and waiting for the boys to arrive.

thankfully, they show up within the first hour of the gallery opening. they each show up looking professional and chic, sporting all-black fits—most likely at the hands of jay. sunghoon immediately finding you and leading the way for the rest. you welcome them in, explaining your collection, the concentration being “vulnerability.” the works are a mix of several mediums, majority being oil paint, each displaying a closeup of various people. the paintings show their bare faces, imperfections and blemishes with nothing to hide.

the night continues with more and more passing by, complimenting your collection. by the time the exhibition ends, you and sunghoon are the only ones left in the studio. he’s stayed in the same spot, eyeing one piece incredibly closely. throughout the entire showcase, he had kept going back to the one canvas. you join his side, linking your arm with his. “this one is my favorite,” you hear him say.

you look up to meet his eyes, “why this one?”

“because…  it’s you.” you takes your arm out and moves to stand behind you, now wrapping himself around you and resting his chin in the crook of your neck. he holds your hands in his, “i am so proud of you. times like this, i am proud to call you my best friend.” he turns his head, kissing you once on your jaw, and then pulling slightly back to kiss you again on the cheek.

you turn around, hugging him closer with your arms around his shoulders, “thank you.” you hold each other for a few minutes. when you pull away, you lock eyes. you feel your heart beating against your chest and your breathing getting faster. you snap back to reality when you feel sunghoon’s lips on yours. you’re not sure why you tangle your fingers in his hair and kiss him back or why he grabs onto your waist while backing you into the wall. he continues placing pecks on the corner of you lips, creating a trail down to your neck. when you let out a sigh and say his name, he stops. there he stands, a few feet in front of you, awkward and unsure of what to do next.

he breaks the silence, “it’s late. i should drive you back home.” he watches as you slowly nod your head. the drive back to your apartment was dead silent. you tried to occupy yourself by looking out the window.

when he drops you off, he bids you a quick goodnight. “um… text me when you get back home.” sunghoon just looks forward, muttering “ok” before leaving.

in the elevator, you look at your reflection on the metal doors. you make your way inside your place and take a seat on your bed. your mind is too busy reliving the moments with sunghoon before. you try to comprehend what you should do but find yourself too tired, instead falling asleep and missing his text.

ix. spring break

it’s currently the middle of april and the boys have made you an honorary member of en-4. you and sunghoon have been pretending to be a couple and successfully tricking everyone for the last four months.

everyone has the week off for spring break. jay, being the generous guy he is, rented out a cabin in the mountains for the now five members of your friend group. you all rode in one car on the way up, and you totally didn’t fall asleep in the middle seat while cuddling into sunghoon’s side. 

you all decide to settle into your rooms once you arrive. “so there are four rooms, two downstairs and two upstairs.” jay pauses, looking towards you and sunghoon, “i assume that you’ll be fine sharing one.”

you immediately answer, “yeah, for sure.” you look to see sunghoon avoiding your gaze, sensing knowing looks from the others. sunghoon and you already guessed that they would make the two of you share a room and truthfully, neither of you minded. growing up together meant a lot of sleepovers and sharing beds so this was no problem.

he continues on, “great, you guys can take the master bedroom on the second floor cause it has the most space. i’ll take the room next to you, heeseung and jake can take the two down here.”

everyone agrees and sets off to their assigned rooms. you and sunghoon drop your bags onto the mattress, starting to unpack. the interior is spacious, the tall glass sliding doors allow lots of natural light to come in. the room itself is cozy, king size bed with matching bedside tables, and a big fluffy area rug. you’re too distracted to notice that sunghoon has gone outside to the balcony. he leans against the railing, taking in the scenic views and the breeze, basking in the setting rust-colored sun. when you finally realize that he’s not next to you anymore, you silently make you way onto the balcony, wrapping your arms around sunghoon from behind.

he tenses up at the sudden contact, relaxing when he realizes it’s you. there it is again, his heart is acting up like at the diner. he’s noticed it more often—the way that whenever he sees you, his heart beats differently. this weird feeling in his chest, this warmth that only shows up around you. he gets lost in his thoughts, envisioning what could become of your situation.

“what’s got you so lost?”

your voice snaps him back to reality. he turns around to face you, “uh… nothing, just thinking.”

just when you want to question him further and talk about what happened at the showcase, a knock is heard on the door. sunghoon walks away, going to open the door. both of you can feel the awkward tension when he leaves his spot. 

“hey, we’re kinda hungry so we’re gonna order some food and watch a movie downstairs,” jake informs you two when the door opens. “feel free to come down and join whenever.”

“yeah, we’ll be down in a bit,” sunghoon tells him as heeseung nods before leaving you two alone again. you both finish getting settled before heading downstairs. you gather around the couch as ponyo plays on the tv and you reach for a tray of sushi. 

the night continues, the moon sitting high amongst the stars. after the movie, dinner, and some drinking games, everyone retires to their respective rooms. you plop yourself onto the bed, tired after the day’s activities. you hear sunghoon getting something from his bag along with the rustling of some plastic. you crane your head up to see him approaching you. he sits on the edge of the bed, now with fluffy headbands and face masks in hand.

you scoot back a bit, “nope. no way you are getting me to do that.”

he laughs lightly at your antics, “oh come on… let me take care of you, at least just for tonight. please.” he gives you a pleading look with pursed lips, dragging out the “please” to show how desperate he is. 

that was the deciding point that led to a spa night. you both changed into comfier clothes, you borrowed one of his hoodies and sweatpants. sunghoon got settled in closer to you and you reached for his wrist to grab one of the elastic bands. you adjusted your position to sit on your knees, reaching up to tie his hair back. he, on the other hand, took one of the headbands to bring your hair back and away from your face. 

by the time midnight rolled around, you two were snuggled under the comforter with face masks, surrounded by junk food, and on the fourth episode of some random netflix show. as the night continues, a wave of sleep starts to overtake both of you. you help each other take off the masks and clean up, getting distracted every few minutes because one of you would start messing around. the boys had stopped by to say goodnight, catching you two in the middle of a mild pillow fight. after sending them off, you fall asleep in each other’s arms, basking in the warmth of your shared embrace. heeseung had snuck in at one point and stole a few quick pictures to tease you two with.

the dawn breaking through the sheer curtains causes you to stir in bed. you turn to see the alarm clock on the nightstand say 6:02. untangling yourself from sunghoon’s grasp, you sneak outside. you climb up to sit on the rooftop, feeling the cool chill of the dewy morning. the time alone gives you a sense of serenity.

meanwhile, sunghoon moves under the covers, confused why he can’t feel you. his eyes open and he doesn’t find a trace of you in the room. worried, he gets up and quietly searches the house, making sure to not wake the others. he goes into the backyard, seeing a shadow on the ground with an unusual shape. he looks up to find you perched on the roof, facing the opposite direction. he eventually climbs up to sit next to you. he hesitates before getting closer and putting his arm around you. you sigh as you lean into him. there you both stay, watching the sun come over the horizon in a comfortable silence.

x. disaster averted

the following week, you all return to campus. needless to say, the break was well used—the days at the cabin mostly being spent at the lake or around the campfire. another day spent hanging out at en-4’s dorm after classes. sunghoon went out to pick up food for everyone. you are in his room, trying to cram for an upcoming test and failing miserably because the other three are all playing fifa way too loud.

while the boys are playing, the doorbell rings. jay gets up to check who it is, seeing a young girl and immediately recognizing her. he lets in yeji, sunghoon’s little sister. she casually joins the boys around the tv, catching up on whatever has been happening in their lives. sunghoon arrives back home within twenty minutes. 

“i’m back with the food,” he shouts out loud enough for everyone to hear including you behind his closed bedroom door. he places the plastic bags on the table, looking up to see another face. “yeji? what are you doing here?”

she gets up to greet her brother, giving him a hug, “it’s my spring break and i wanted to stop by.” sunghoon then realizes that his family doesn’t know about him becoming friends with you again or about your current situation. he drags her into the kitchen hurriedly, “ok so here’s the thing… you remember y/n?”

“of course! she’s like my big sister.”

his breath gets caught in his throat for a second, “yeah, don’t call her that. anyways, her and i are friends again,” he sees yeji’s eyes widen with excitement and continues with his explanation before she can cut him off, “and she’s my girlfriend.”

“what?!”

sunghoon panics and covers her mouth with his palm, “fake girlfriend!” he rushes out the whisper. “the guys don’t know that our relationship isn’t real and i’d like to keep it that way. they don’t even know that we were friends beforehand. yeji, i’m begging you to go along with it. please do this for me.” he clasps his hands together in front of him with a pleading expression.

the young girl crosses her arms in front of her and pretends to think about it, “hmm… fine.”

sunghoon blurts out a chant of “thank you’s” not knowing that his sister only agreed cause she always thought that you and sunghoon would’ve been a good couple. he tells her to help the others set the table while he goes to you. he quickly explains what’s happening and you’re just excited that you get to see yeji again. you both leave his room and you make your own way to the living room, spotting the other girl and exchanging glances.

yeji stops what she’s doing to turn and face you, “who’s this?”

you answer back casually, “y/n. i’m a friend of the boys, and you are?”

“yeji, sunghoon’s younger sister.” she says it proudly, bringing a grin to the aforementioned boy.

“oh, you’re yeji? hoon was right… you are pretty.”

she tilts her head and cocks an eyebrow, questioning you “why would he tell you about me?”

jake chimes in like it’s second nature, “i mean, why wouldn’t he tell his girlfriend about his sister?” he states like it’s so obvious. “they’ve been together since december.”

“girlfriend?” she takes a step back in false shock, “since december? why didn’t i know about this?” 

“what? i don’t seem like your brother’s type?”

“it’s not that. i’m just surprised he managed to get and keep a girlfriend. you’re like, way out of his league and he’s a loser.” one thing to know about yeji is that as much as she loves him, she will never miss a chance to tease her brother. 

with a scoff, you finally hear sunghoon join in beside you, “not gonna lie, that one hurt a little.”

“i’m so telling mom,” she says with a mischievous smirk.

you laugh at sunghoon’s shocked face and smile at the younger park, “i like you, i think we’ll get along just fine.”

“i like you, too.” she looks at sunghoon, “keep her.”

everyone laughs at the interaction as they settle in to eat. sunghoon sits to your right while yeji sits on your left, wondering how his two favorite girls learned to be such good actresses.

xi. returning the favor

fast forward another month, the end of the semester means the dreaded finals week again. sunghoon has been, for lack of a better word, slacking on some of his classes and is now juggling to prepare for exams and revisions. couple that with yeji telling his mom about your “relationship” and her nonstop questions, all of this stress has been piled on. this all amounting to him getting sick. 

now, sunghoon being sunghoon means that he pushed everyone away and hasn’t told you about his condition. luckily for him, you’ve been cooped up in your studio trying to finish your portfolio and also prepare for your exams. unluckily for him, the boys have gotten worried and heeseung called you. 

which brings us to the present, sunghoon stuck in bed with a fever, congestion, and neglected notes. a knock on his door does nothing to help his headache but seeing your face meekly peek in makes him relax. “what are you doing here?” he asks hoarsely.

“did you really think i wouldn’t find out?”

he avoids your glare, “i didn’t want you to worry.”

“honestly i’m not upset that you’re sick, but that i had to hear it from your roommates.” you come closer to him, clearing out the scattered papers and textbooks from atop his bed. you sit on the edge, taking out some medicine and cooling packs that you picked up from the convenience store.

“you really don’t have to do this,” he twiddles his fingers in embarrassment.

you tie back his hair and place one of the packs on his forehead, “you’ve always been the one taking care of me, so i might as well return the favor.” 

you busy yourself with getting the cough medicine ready and sunghoon takes an actual look at you. he notices that you’re wearing his old skating jacket, the same one he gave you at your high school graduation. he makes more room under the covers, allowing you to come closer and lay next to him. he drapes one arm over you and holds onto the end of the jacket sleeve, “i can’t believe you kept this.”

“we stopped hanging out and we weren’t in each other’s lives for a year and a half after being together basically since birth,” you pause, a little saddened thinking back. “this was the last thing i ever got from you. it’s all i had left.”

he brings you closer, neither of you caring if you got sick. “well… now you have me again. for good.”

xii. the party

the end of the school year has finally arrived. some seniors from the txt frat are hosting a big party to celebrate. of course, en-4 was invited—mostly thanks to heeseung being close with them. although you have made more friends and now have a more active social life, parties are still not your thing. 

yet, much to your dismay, being friends with designated party people means that you’re getting bombarded with pleas to go regardless. sunghoon took the lead on convincing you, “please, i promise that it’ll be fun.” the boys join in, their voices overlapping. sunghoon practically tackles you onto your couch while pouting and furrowing his eyebrows in desperation.

“stop looking at me like that. i can’t think properly when you do that.”

right on cue, the boys start to tease you. jay clears his throat and jake makes kissing noises, meanwhile heeseung starts singing y/n and sunghoon sitting in a tree… while you just glare at them.

“if i say i’ll go, will you all leave me alone?” 

they all shout “yes” in unison. which is how you ended up at the crowded frat house. although they had begged you to come, they practically abandon you and sunghoon when you get there. jake had yelled back to you that his friend sunoo from his econ class called them over for beer pong.

you and sunghoon find a big bean bag in the corner and stay there for a bit. he offers to get you both some drinks and leaves to the kitchen. you’re not sure how long he’s gone but you eventually get uncomfortable. you start wandering the house for some space to get some air. you find an empty room and make your way into the connected bathroom to wash your face. you take some deep breaths, then realizing that you didn’t tell sunghoon. as you’re about to step out, he enters the room.

“i figured you would want some space.”

“how’d you know where i was?”

he comes up closer to you, “in the sea of people, in this mess, in this frenzy… i will always find you. no matter what happens or who comes into my life, i always find my way back to you.”

“what the hell is that even supposed to mean, park?”

“i mean…” he stops to compose himself, “oh for fucks sake, i’m tired of this being pretend. i’m tired of being allowed to call you my girlfriend in public but not treat you like it in private. when i kissed you at the showcase, i had wanted to do that for so long, and i’ve been wanting to do even more.”

“sunghoon, look-”

“wait, i’m not done. what i’m trying to say is that i want you to be my girlfriend, for real this time—not as a joke, not as a trick. i want us to be together as an actual couple because i like you, a lot more than you could believe-”

you cut him off this time, kissing him like he did all those weeks ago. you kissed him in the way that you weren’t sure what words to say other than, “i would love to be your girlfriend.”

sunghoon shines with the biggest smile, picking you up and spinning around. when he lets you down, he incessantly leaves pecks all over your face. he holds you close, “now, how about we go enjoy the party?”

you nod and lead him hand in hand towards the door. you turn the nob, only to have the three remaining members of your friend group fall at your feet. heeseung landing on top, shouting out, “i fucking knew it!”

[whaleofatjme1920]

please scenario where him and his s/o have been besties with toby since they met as proxies when they were young and when they meet up later in life they confess 🙏🏻🙏🏻

Parking Lots, and Surrounded By Your Group and His

[Ticci Toby X GN!Reader]

[Warnings: mentions of death? Nothing major though.]

[AN: I changed the prompt,,,, ever so slightly,,,????]

When the crickets sing in the grass and the breeze is warm and gentle, Toby can’t help but be reminded of a simpler time when he would spend his afternoons catching bugs and eating ice cream on the front lawn with you. He can still hear your laughter as the sun begins to slowly sink below the horizon before the fireflies begin to make their appearance.

He used to spend hours on said front lawn catching them with you, listening to you speak and interjecting with his own jokes. The two of you always had such a grand time together, even when his father would angrily call him back into the house.

Toby didn’t know what love was when he was young, but only that he had it. Every little touch you gave him, the smiles and giggles, they were all small micro expressions of some kind of love - as much love as a child could give. Toby didn’t know how much he adored you. Growing up, the two of you had grown closer and closer. He saw you blossom into a young adult alongside him. Well, he didn’t really blossom, but more so choked his way into being a young adult. And you were by his side for it all, even the hardest, darkest days.

When he lost his mother and sister, he called you in a panic, his voice rough like sandpaper and creaking like wood. He was frantic, unable to form proper sentences. You threw out your evening plans and hopped in your car, driving like a mad man over to his house, ready to console him. The air felt still, cold and slightly clammy as you drove nearer and nearer to his house.

There, on the front porch waiting for you, head in his hands and tears drenching his form was Toby, unable to process the world and everything and everyone in it. He looked so broken and downtrodden as he clutched at his clothes tighter, rocking himself and hugging what physical part of him he could.

Your heart tore into pieces as you parked, then rushed out of the vehicle to hold him. “Toby, Toby!” You called out, tears welling in your eyes as you bounded up to the distraught boy.

He furrowed his eyebrows and blinked away more tears, letting out a strained sob as he picked himself up off the rickety wooden porch, meeting you part of the way. He felt the breath leave his lungs as you crashed into his arms, burying your face into his chest.

“I’m so sorry,” you mumbled like a mantra into his chest, letting him hold you tighter and tighter to the point you couldn’t breathe.

Toby didn’t let you go that night.

The last time he saw you was in the parking lot of your high school. Toby had been grieving the loss of his mother and sister, becoming more and more withdrawn into himself. He’d honestly been withdrawing from you as well, and that concerned you more than anything. So, to remedy this, you took matters into your own hands and forced him to meet you in the parking lot after school.

The two of you sat down on the hood of your car, talking about the world and its wonders and the things that are better left unsaid until late, late in the night.

Toby felt so at home in your presence that he was able to block out the voices for just a little longer. He reveled in the sound of your laughter and the presence of your being. He was just… Lighter than air to be with you.

But all good things must come to an end, and unfortunately, your parents desiring you home had brought the time the two of you shared together to an end.

“I love you, Tobes, you know that right?” You murmured as you hugged him for what you didn’t know was your final time.

“O-Of course I d-d-do,” he whispered back, nose burying into your hair. “I l-love you,” he said, tears threatening to spill once more.

The two of you remained in each other’s embrace before you parted from him, and he let you go for the final time.

And Toby felt alone, oh so alone.

So alone that he burnt down the village to feel its warmth.

There’s only been like, three moments in Toby’s life when he’s been surprised. The first being meeting you as a child, the second being the loss of the two most important women of his life, and the third? Being taken into the arms of the Operator.

He’s a proxy now, does his job well, and is with a group that sometimes tolerates him. He’s in a better place than when he was a child under his father’s roof.

“We’re going to work with another group tonight,” Masky says, a slight sigh lingering on his lips.

“W-Who are they?”

“You know Wallace, don’t you?” Hoodie suddenly cuts in.

Toby nods. He likes Ruth and Nyein, the other two he can live without.

“They got a new proxy,” Masky continues. “And they want us to take them for the evening. So, I guess we’re only working with their runt,” Masky finishes more to himself than anyone else. He brushes his fingers through his hair and pats his pocket for the car keys. “C’mon, might as well head over. Gonna be a bit of a drive.”

Toby glances over his shoulder at Kate, who is watching reruns of Judge Judy and slowly nodding off. “And s-s-she gets o-off scott f-free?” He teases lightly as he stands up, pushing his chair in across the checkered floor. He cracks his neck loudly before walking over to the sofa, his gloved hand rustling Kate’s hair.

She sleepily laughs. “Have fun and be safe, boys.”

“Get some sleep,” Masky chuckles, watching as Hoodie rustles her hair just as Toby did before heading out.

Toby zoned out a bit on the car ride to wherever the meeting place was. He always tended to zone out, but he couldn’t shake some weird buzzing in the back of his head. Something about the way Masky and Hoodie are talking about Wallace’s newest runt…

He doesn’t often remember things from his life before he became a proxy. The Operator made sure of that so he wouldn’t be too heartbroken to continue his job. But he’s always been able to remember you - more or less. Little glimpses, the feelings associated, you were never easy to get rid of.

Instead of mentally traumatizing him further, the Operator allowed him to keep his thoughts and feelings associated with you. Most days, Toby’s dim love for you spurred him forward.

“Time to go meet a runt,” Hoodie says, voice only slightly amused by the way the word ‘runt’ rolls off his tongue.

Masky parks the car and then shoves the keys into his pocket, nodding that it’s okay for everyone to get out of the car.

Toby stretches briefly in his seat before sliding out of the car, taking in the crisp night air. He takes a gander at his surroundings for a moment before locking eyes on a group of people. Wallace and his group - Toby narrows his eyes at the two men before catching Ruth and Nyein. His favorite proxy that’s not part of his group and his favorite independent other than Jeff and EJ. How nice.

Masky begins to walk over to meet the other group leader with Toby and Hoodie close behind. He looks tired, which is usual for him, but happy to see that Nyein is excitedly waving. “Heard you had a runt for us?”

“Sure do,” Theo says, looking over his shoulder. “C’mon out, they’re not going to bite you.”

“What, are they scared of us?” Hoodie chuckles as he puts his hands into his pockets. He glances past Theo to see a dark shape moving in the backseat of the car.

“It’s like, their first day working with people that aren’t us,” Wallace attempts to explain. “And from what we can gather, they only entered this life because of-”

“Toby.”

The name that pours from your lips sends Toby’s head and heart spinning. “E-Excuse me?” He barely manages to choke out as you step forward, pushing aside Wallace and Theo, looking at the much taller man with stars in your eyes.

“Oh my gods, Toby, is that you?” You whisper, still walking forward to meet him like a dream.

Toby’s eyes widen as he looks at you, no, stares you down. You look so much different than when he let you go as a teen - you’re all grown up now! Some things have changed about you, but other things have stayed the same.

Both your group and Toby’s give each other confused looks as if to ask the other if they knew about this before you rush forward, face planting into Toby’s chest.

He takes in a sharp breath and embraces you, laughter bubbling up from his throat. He takes in your sweet scent and picks you up, moving you from the group as he begins to twirl you and babble on about how much he missed you.

You giggle, tears falling like drops of rain from your eyes before you feel yourself planting back down into the parking lot, your attention focused on him and no one else. Your stomach is fluttering with butterflies as you look up at the teary eyed man. “How have you been?” You ask quietly, closing your eyes as Toby leans down slightly to rest his forehead against yours.

“Never better.”

[toiletwipes]

hoppípolla; part one

college!dream x afab reader but they pronouns

nervous college student you, smoked weed with dream one night and you couldn't ever forget it. starting a crush you knew would be the death of you. and at the moment, you had a terrible way of dealing with things. and things just kept happening, one thing after another.

a little author's note: i'm splitting it into parts because i like the attention and also because it feels right

2.37k words

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he literally couldn't get any hotter.

you sit at a mini-bar, crossing your leg over the other, sipping at your sprite. there was he was, in all of his fucking glory, was dream. your classmate in your english course and the one person at this party who you knew, for an absolute fact, smoked weed. and although he wasn't smoking right now, the beer in his hand said that he probably wasn't going to be, tonight.

oh you knew, this was a college dorm party, and people tried all sorts of party drugs, and weed was the tip of the iceberg. no, you knew that.

but no one was also that hot.

well.

maybe they were but they just weren't dream, not a stoner, not someone who had damn good genetics, and someone who knew how to roll a joint perfectly. not to mention, his best friend sapnap? also your best friend.

he's the one who introduced you two, despite having shared english for the past year. and he's the one who brought you and dream to the party.

(yeah, you sat in the back, pulling at the cords of your hoodie, watching the sides of his face move with quiet notions, talking to sapnap as he drove and playing soft music to match the rain.)

thinking even more, you wanted to just get up and go outside, just the urge to smoke something and anything, something to fill your lungs as your mind numbs just even the tiniest bit.

you sigh, taking one more sip of your drink before leaving it at the mini-bar, slipping your hands into the pocket of your hoodie and sliding out a cigarette out of its carton. taking a step outside, you sigh in relief seeing the dry porch. several others sat in a circle, passing around a beer and two decent blunts. sometimes sharing a kiss, sometimes the smoke between their lips.

what you would give to do that with dream, you bemoaned silently, as you lit your own cigarette, inhaling the bitter nicotine as you enjoyed the patters of the rain.

wiping your hand down on a bench, and seeing as it wasn't as wet as you thought it would be, you take a seat and take another long drag.

"so, what did he say?"

a girl with a bright green mullet and the sides of her head dyed pink, and several piercings in an non-existent eyebrow, she stares at you expectantly. as if you had an answer.

"don't know. haven't really talked to him." you shrug, trying not to think about any of your past conversations with him. all dull, all about school, all about homework. there would be no reason for him to agree to anything dealing with you in any romantic sense. or sexually, if you even dared.

"you know what that means right?" you look at her with a pinched expression. "it means you start talking to him, then ask him to blow your back out, or whatever it is you want" you almost choke on the smoke coming out of you but you mostly laugh it off.

"yeah like he'd want to talk to me," you muse, finding the stranger oddly comforting as she came over to sit next to you.

"well you don't know that, do you?" you had to give her that. you didn't know. but it wouldn't take a genius to guess the right answer. "does he smoke?" she asks, turning to you and feeling like there's nothing really stopping you from becoming besties, you pass your cigarette to her.

"i know he smokes weed but nothing else as far as i'm aware." you lean forward onto your knees, pressing your chin into your palms. "but honestly, i don't know him that much to begin with, so like, what's the point?"

the mullet hands it back to you after a pondering puff, and when you take a drag, she answers. "well, the way i see it, you can ask him out or you hookup tonight, or try to move on if you're serious about him." she pats your knees, moving to stand as she stretched. "but really, i hope it goes well, and if you need anything," she flicks out a card and watches you take it with disregarding eyes, "give me a call." and without as so much another word, she's leaving in a Beetle with her circle of friends.

glancing at it, it's a card to the floral shop but with a name on it. pocketing it and then snuffing out the bud, you leave it dead on the porch, hoping to find sapnap and beg him to take you home.

you appreciated the nice girl for the conversation and maybe the start of a healthy friendship, but even just being with someone other than dream made your heart twist in your chest.

you didn't have time to search for your best friend as he clung to dream, who was dragging his ass close to the door, where you stood now.

and when you finally appeared in his vision, you see relief and a smile sink into his face. you don't know why but you push down a smile as he approaches you with long strides. but what happens next is downright hilarious.

"we have to go right now, sap just puked all over minx and she's this close to blowing this house up," his nose wrinkles with his smile, you notice, but you nod without much thought.

"need me to drive?" you offer, though, you hates nothing more than exactly that.

"please, i've had a few beers and i don't want to risk driving tipsy," he says and you want to just cry.

you nod as you hold your hand up for the keys, and upon them being dropped in the center, you swallow down the dryest, biggest lump in your throat.

hearing several honks behind you, you don't even move above the speed limit in the neighborhood, which was five. it was fucking raining and you happened to have the biggest crush in existence on the person sitting in the passenger seat.

"i know you're driving right now, but have you heard of this song?"

the first ten seconds are tense, piano notes building up to a release after the next twenty with a guitar and drums in the back.

you recognized it easily, finding it comforting. you smile as you glance behind your shoulder and flick your turn signal on. "it's called hoppípolla, isn't it? from that one movie with the cursed girl?" he laughs and your heart clenches, wanting to hear it more.

"yeah, i just wanted to see if you'd recognize it, i've shown it to like, ten people and only a few knew it." you knew it was silly to be proud to know it but you couldn't help it. you felt easy, easy to ply with.

"yeah, well, i do have an eccentric movie taste," you smile as you turn onto the next street over, finding sapnap's house immediately. originally his parents, but they were gone for a small vacation while it was the summer.

putting the car in park, you let out a breath, just happy to be done with driving for the moment. "you okay?" you jump in your seat, finding dream already out of the car with sapnap in his arms.

the man in question babbled with incoherent words, but you paid him no mind.

"um, yeah, i uh, i just- just hate driving," you grimace as you pull yourself out of the car, getting hit with the constant pelting rain.

he frowns, of all things, walking to the porch as you beat him there already, unlocking the door.

he lays sapnap down on the couch as you make your way to the kitchen, helping yourself to the gourmet chocolate cake left there by his parents' anniversary.

tasting as sweet as you thought it would be, but somehow so fucking bitter at the same time. maybe it's the way you want to cry but how lame would that be? found in your best friend's house crying as you ate their cake?

not cool.

wiping your face with the sleeve of your hoodie, you pick yourself up and sit on the counter, desperate to change how your feeling. your skirt riding up your thighs, almost hiding in your oversized hoodie, not that you noticed.

and as if he could read your fucking mind, he walks in as he's ruffling his head of hair, as if he just got out of the shower. catching you on the counter, you had half a mind to stop eating cake and get down but you just didn't care at this point.

"want some?" you offered, sliding the platter of cake towards him while you tried to hide the fact that your face was blotchy and your nose couldn't stop sniffling. you hated the way pity looked in people. but when you turned to give dream a spoon, you saw nothing but a man with flushed cheeks and darting eyes. "are- are you good, dream?" you ask, almost disbelieving that this man is anything but flustered.

"you just, uh, well. i- i don't know how to say this but." he covers his mouth and face with one hand as he points to your lap. raising an eyebrow, you turn your head down to see the little, cyan bow on the front of your grey panties.

"oh fuck-" you dropped your fork as you yanked your skirt down and hopped from the counter, barely meeting his shoulders as you went to move away from him.

tears dropped from your eyes faster as you went to leave, when dream's arm shoots out to stop you, grabbing you by the arm as he protests you leaving.

"okay, it's bad but you can stay, um, let's just finish the cake and go to bed." you really didn't want to, dream seeing your underwear while you ate cake was forcibly checked off your bucket list.

turning around, you wanted to shrink and then be crushed like a bug underneath dream's shoe, but you settled for picking up your spoon and shoveling a bit of cake in your mouth until you couldn't think about anything else.

you flashed your crush, and he asked you to stay to eat cake. cake, of all things, you mourned.

wished somebody eat you out, you weep in your head, and come to your horror, dream starts choking on cake, coughing loudly as he punched his chest.

"i have a feeling i said something out loud." you feel humiliated as you just let the fork fall from your fingers, walking out of the kitchen, not hearing the man disagree and then as you're about to just pull your shoes on and leave, dream comes out of the kitchen and puts his hands on your shoulders.

"listen, uhh, i don't want to freak you out, but a few weeks ago, when- when we went to that party with george, he may or may not have said that you had, uh, that you have a crush on me and- is- is that right?" his words fell out of his mouth faster than he could trip over his feet. "do you like me like that?"

you wanted to melt into the ground.

"can i just go?" you whimpered out, turning your head as you tried to pull his hands off your shoulder.

"please answer the question," he begs, moving his hands from your shoulders to your cheeks, cradling it as he got closer. "because i cannot stop thinking about you, and every time we're alone, you always leave as soon as possible but then you looked so hot on the counter-" he breaks off, moaning under your stare as you listen with wide eyes.

"please say you feel the same," he begged pulling your face close to his as you gripped his arms.

"and what would you do if i did?" you whispered, eyes closing as you tried to hold onto your beating heart. his breath fanned over your lips, and all you could think about was him, him, him.

"anything you'd let me do," he says and you let out a broken moan when your two lips met, slotting against each other as if they were always meant for this. he moves his hands from your face to your shoulders and down as he moved to your waist. you grabbed a handful of his hair, the other holding the side of his face, and he moves his mouth from yours and licks a stripe down your chin to your neck.

"do you remember the day we first met," he murmured against your skin as you panted. "you were shivering while we waited for the professor, and you asked if you could borrow my jacket." it does ring a bell but you're not thinking too hard when he starts biting into your neck.

"and when you keep showing up, wearing my jacket, and that pretty, short skirt," he reaches up with one hand to hold onto your neck as he sucks a hickey right into your skin, painting as much as he could with such a pliable canvas as your skin.

"the things you do to me," he lets out a moan so broken, you wondered how he could be this affected by you and you not noticing for so long.

"we have all night, we can-" you let out a whine as he sucks hard into that sweet spot, "we can try to do it, everything, everything you and i want."

reaching down, he slipped his hands underneath your ass, picking you up with ease as he moved towards the guest bedroom. "i hope you're not planning on walking anywhere tomorrow," he pants in your ear, leaning you against the door as he uses the one hand to open it. kicking it behind him, he lays you on the bed, pushing up his hoodie to mouth kisses onto your stomach.

"as long as you'll have me," you spoke with need, your voice breaking just as much as his. and he nods hard, before he moves back over you to kiss your lips.

"you ready?"

[junicai]

Relationship with WAYV

➣ KUN ☾ karia

if it wasn’t for dotae potentially coming to kill him, he would steal aria into wayv

he’s the cool dad? 

they can’t spend a lot of time together because none of their schedules match up, but aria takes every third or so weekend out to come have dinner in the wayv dorms

she’s surprisingly close to the china line, and its a combination of ten dragging her to his dorm for an entire month and them just kinda adopting her when they realized she was a foreigner as well 

yuta can fight them, she’s one of them now

he doesn’t like to baby her a lot, and she really appreciates the break from being the “maknae” so to speak 

however does that stop him from giving her the forehead kithes? no

aria sad? forehead kith

aria mad? forehead kith

aria smad? forehead kith + kuddles (kun cuddles)

he has sent her a passive agressive text when he found out that she wasn’t eating enough again and had almost passed out

but he finished it with a heart so its ok

if she isn’t smiling at all times, someone will die

aria feels like she can trust him with a lot; that no matter what she tells him, he’ll never out her or make fun of her

kun actually took a two-week online course to learn how to make traditional japanese dishes when aria mentioned missing her parents

he originally was going to learn how to make irish dishes, but he changed his mind after seeing what they were

“im not giving my kids boiled cabbage and mashed potatoes what kind of post world war-”

wants to give her a chinese name but hasn’t yet because he hasn’t found the one that fits her right and he wants it to be perfect 

aria teaches him japanese phrases in exchange for him teaching her a little bit of mandarin

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

aria saw kun’s back as she entered the practice room, the man standing with three other members in the centre of the floor before the choreographer came in to start their practice. coming up behind him, she wrapped her arms around his waist, peeking her head around from where she was. “hi!” she smiled brightly.

“hi,” ten chuckled, showing her the camera that had just filmed all of that. 

➣ TEN ☾ tenaria

Whipped(TM)

so so gone for her its upsetting actually

yangyang and aria share the position of his baby 

except aria willingly accepts the title while yangyang would rather fling himself from a rooftop

ten’s instagram is half his cats, half miyazu aria

he posts her dancing practice on his story a lot, with a variety of captions ranging from “thats my baby  ♡( ◡‿◡ )” to “yah that’s not right...(눈_눈)”

such an enabler for her bad ideas 

aria wants to go shopping at 4am? ten agrees, now they’re sitting by han river eating ice cream

pls he’s gonna get her in so much trouble one day

when they walk together, ten likes to take her hand and put it in his pocket 

its under the pretense of not wanting her to get lost 

he just wants to hold her hand

yes he has lost her in a shopping mall, and NO it wasn’t his fault

ten always complains that they never have schedules together and he misses his baby 

“we have superm-” “I NEVER SEE YOUUUU (ﾉಥ益ಥ)ﾉ”

if they’re in the same room ten is either watching her out of the corner of his eye, or is actually wrapped around her like a boa constrictor 

hugs n kithes all around

only he is allowed make fun of her mistakes in dancing 

anyone else gets deaded. he will fight for her honor how dare you insult his baby 

sm give these ttwo a dancing duo video pls 

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

the first and only time aria and ten had a duet was during their last concert on superm’s first world tour. during the second half of ten’s solo performance, aria emerged from the left side of the stage, coming to join him in the centre stage. no one had ever seen aria as serious as she was then, both herself and ten becoming completely different people in the moment. midway through, aria spun with her back to ten and leaped backwards into the air - eyes closed - completely trusting ten to be where she needed him to be to catch her. 

➣ WINWIN ☾ winria

a love hate relationship at its finest

they don’t actually hate each other it’s just really funny to pretend that they do (especially because yuta complains that 2 of his favourite people aren’t getting along)

winwin is so savage towards aria but it’s ok she claps back twice as hard

at first, before czennies had seen enough of their dynamic they thought that they actually did hate each other

but that’s not true they just don’t know how to express, affection, without brutally insulting the other with a loving tone

they are, surprisingly, the most stable pairing in 127 - they have a dynamic and rarely stray from that, which is a good comfort for the fans

despite what they might say to each other, they don’t mean any of it - and winwin has been seen several times raising his eyebrows with a questioning look at aria to make sure she wasn’t taking any of his playful jabs to heart

oh god the flexibility

the entirety of nct is terrified of them

the day sm gives them a circus act is the day that kun and taeyong have a heart attack

quietly supportive of each other - catch aria “playing” with a water bottle and not getting up to get it when it conveniently rolls across the floor and into winwin’s leg

he makes sure to save some new chinese sweets whenever the wayv members get packages from their familes, and sneak it into aria’s room before the managers can catch her breaking her diet

not really physically affectionate with each other, which played into czennies idea that they didn’t like each other but aria cleared it up in a vlive

“winwinnie and I, well. we don’t hug a lot because i know he doesn’t like it as much as i might, so i try to show him i care with other things :)”

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

winwin and aria going in to each other on knowing brothers, to the point where the mc’s had their eyes popping out of their head and waved about to stop the segment before aria could start attacking winwin’s cooking methods-

nothing is off limits when it comes to them

➣ LUCAS ☾ arihei

besties 

please they’re so cute together - tol child next to tini child she barely comes up to his chest :(

bear hugs

he just swamps her in his arms, and when he doesn’t feel like being bent over he picks her up 

complains that she’s too heavy but then immediately after will throw her around like a softball 

someone tell this man to be careful with her she’s not a barbie doll 

singular braincell energy

don’t get it wrong, they’re both super smart 

so it’s just - being smort together, but then nearly dying because neither of them remembered that you couldn’t eat raw cookie dough when there are eggs in it

she adores how he’s so confident in the things that he does - like convincing the entire nct fandom that he was fluent in english? king behaviour

so aria looks up to him (literally) but also because she wants to have that confidence some day 

lucas says they’re not close and then aria pouts and he takes it all back

nczennies made a 14 minute compilation titled “lucas melting like a popsicle in australia for aria” 

and literally what the title tells you, this man goes :(( when he sees her 

lucas was actually the person to convince her to go ahead with the [redacted] proposal - and reminded her that it was too good an opportunity to pass up just because she felt like she was outgrowing the boys

he’s so proud of her

and she’s so proud of him 

they’re so proud of each other and it makes nczennies want to cry because they never are seen together 

sm stop separating the platonic soulmates first markhyuck and now arihei smh

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

during a photoshoot, aria was standing off to the side of the boys, dressed in white suit to contrast the boys’ black ones. the photographer was calling out to her to get her to move closer, but she couldn’t hear him from so far away, and so lucas (who was on the end) just walked over to her, gripped her by the biceps and lifted her vertically and to the left a little bit. 

“luc-LUCAS?”

“you had to move :)”

➣ XIAOJUN ☾ arijun

honestly these two aren’t super close, just because their schedules never matched up until the NCT 2020 promotions

even when aria was dragged to the wayv dorms, xiaojun kept his distance from her because he didn’t want to make her uncomfortable 

even so, when they were filming Make A Wish together, they seemed comfortable enough around each other

there was a mutual agreement to not try fill the silence with awkward small talk, so they sat in silence when left alone together

they’re both shy :( someone needs to get them to talk to each other :(

even so, aria was all supportive smiles and thumbs-up when she saw him getting nervous before their first public stage as the unit 

he was a little intimidated of her at first, but also really curious about how she was holding her own against the other members

not only physically, but her vibes are tiny let the man be concerned ok

his first impression of aria was just: small quiet? she was sitting apart from the other boys in the practice room, and he almost wanted to go over and ask her if she was ok; before she was approached by donghyuck and her face broke into a bright smile 

aria’s first impression of xiaojun was: eyebrows he was really handsome? at first, she thought he was in the wrong room, seeing as the SM modeling auditions were happening in the next room down

any arijun shippers are starved of content im so sorry guys 

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

currently still up for debate between the fandom :(

➣ HENDERY ☾ aridery

ah these two 

you might as well sign a waiver if you decide to do anything with them, because they can and will get you killed 

kun can testify

ten’s the enabler but hendery is the do-er

super giggly around each other, for no reason at all

hendery could pick up and throw a basketball and suddenly aria’s on the floor in literal stitches 

have a secret code 

no seriously

they don’t text in words, they just send various reaction memes and a colourful variety of emojis to convey emotions and scenarios 

it’s become quite a beautiful language actually 

got some nice proverbs in there

they’re like, cousins but the ones you only see at family reunions but get so hype to see them

that energy 

asides from the chaotic, murderous vibes they possess as a duo

hendery knows what it’s like to miss home, to miss your parents, etc etc

and so he tries to make aria feel as home as possible - especially with wayv, because they’re all foreigners who know how she feels 

whenever he gets packages from his parents who have sent things over, he always makes sure to keep some of the small treats/sweets back for aria

1. because he knows she’ll appreciate the thought and she gives good hugs

2. because he knows she’s on a diet constantly and never allowed eat these things when she’s in the dorms with managers around 

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

filming the Resonance “Wish” event, aria was put in a skimpy minimalistic mock-suit to differentiate from the others’ clothes. unfortunately, that left aria with a little too much shoulder and chest on display than she would like, and she was noticeably uncomfortable with her clothes, constantly pulling it up and even going so far as to just hold it with her hands. 

hendery saw this, and knew he was finished filming his segment for the time being, so he pulled off his own jacket and tossed it over to aria, who caught it with a grateful smile. “thank you,” she mouthed to him, tugging the dark blue material over her shoulders.

➣ YANGYANG ☾ ariyang

aria. has 9 days of age on this boy and will never let him forget it

“respect your elders you brat” “9. DAYS.”

european pals 

they feel so cultured when they get asked about europe, and then are kindly reminded by hendery that A. Germany started 2 world wars, and B. Ireland was just a British colony until 100 years ago. 

they both hit him for that

aria teaching him curse words in irish and yangyang teaching her curse words in german? more likely than you’d think 

they met before yangyang’s debut was announced, in a practice room that had let them accidentally overlap their practice times 

instead of working it out between them, they actually just started to alternate their songs - and the other gave them some good, constructive criticism 

most of the time

when they found out they were going to be in 90s Love together, they were so happy 

it was going to be their first official schedule together

all the behind-the-scenes videos are just aria and yangyang being children and then ten coming over and cooing at them 

they love ten, but they will trash talk the man behind his back 

yangyang confessed to her that he sometimes feels nervous when speaking korean, like he’s going to make a big mistake

so she tries her best to teach and correct him where she can, and make him as comfortable as possible 

if you look at any of the 90s Love promotions - aria is always beside yangyang

he bit her ear once

she doesn’t know why and he won’t tell her

but now when she makes fun of him, he threatens to do it again 

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

aria skating onto the rink during filming, and yangyang following her because she promised to teach him how to skate backwards.

“ok just, think like you’re leading with your heels. press your knees in, and push outwards, with you-no no that’s forwards. go backwards yangyang.”

“no no no thats a WALL YANGYANG STOP-” 

[nct-lian]

wayv’s relation to lian

KUN + LIAN: LUN

they have the cutest little interactions ever :(

was one of the members that kun was most comfortable around at first

she made him feel so welcomed!

when nct 2018 appeared on weekly idol, lian was placed in the front

but she moved her chair over to kun’s side to be closer to him !!!!!!!

lun stans found dead

they go out to eat food together a lot :D

now that lian doesn’t feel the need to look over him anymore, he stepped in and is now a very good parental figure for her

he bought her an expensive ass ring for her birthday

him and johnny both being her dad: 🤝

kun has been arguing back and forth with chenle about lian’s chinese name

he loves the name xiuying for her :(

they hype each other up all the time !!

lian and kun had the best time with each other when filming from home

we got so many adorable clips of them :DDDD

when talking to each other they can’t pick a solid language

like they’re always switching between mandarin and korean

they also slip in a bit of english at times as well

TEN + LIAN: LITEN

if kun is her dad then ten is her cool uncle

he lets her do whatever she wants

like he will just sit and watch as she teases the fUCK out of hyuck

HES TEACHING HER THAI

just like kun they switch between multiple languages in a conversation

they normally speak english with each other!

their fashion game is always on point.

no actually they literally wore matching shirts one time

liten supremacy breaking the internet: <3

ten once said “guys she’s like my daughter stop being weird~~~!” on vlive when people kept asking if him and lian were dating

as he should !

they mention each other ¿ everywhere ?

THEY DANCE TOGETHER ALL THE TIME

ten even helped her choreograph the new ver. of yoncé

don’t touch me i’m soft

no because ten ships her with someone in the group … just not who you’d think ;)

i swear he’s her #1 hypeman

ten was actually the one who made their ship name- goals asf sry i don’t make the rules

WINWIN + LIAN: LIWIN

lian is yet another member of nct who will sacrifice her soul to the devil for winwin

“winwin winwin winwin winwin is on the mind forever and always i love you winwin” was what she posted for his birthday

AND THE FEELING IS MUTUAL

winwin loves her just as much and he shows it

he likes hugging her DDDDD:

also ten ships them

so that’s that uh :p

lian cried so hard when he had to pause promotions with 127 :(

especially because they were super close!

winwin was actually another one of her first friends in nct because she was fluent in mandarin

and they were both super comfortable speaking with each other :)

winwin: i like lian the most :D

yuta + taeil: am i a joke to you?

no cause yuta is constantly losing in this thing

lian picks winwin and winwin picks lian what is happening

winwin’s current lockscreen is a picture of lian rolling her eyes at yangyang

yup yup their lockscreen tradition LISTEN AND WEEP

winwin’s selfies are lian’s favourite thing :)

LUCAS + LIAN: LULIAN

omfg the chaos these two bring

i’m crying because nct 2018 was chaotic in itself but lulian was something else

THEY WERE ALWAYS SCREAMING ????

taeyong was going through an existential crisis the entirety of 2018

AND BYE LUCAS WILL NOT STOP COMPARING THEIR HAND SIZES

leave it in 2018 sweetheart we been knew lian is the size of a jellybean

he had her react to his drama where he dances to replay after killing his girlfriend

lian confirmed it was 10/10 and would recommend watching

she genuinely thinks lucas should have been added to nct dream and she stands by that opinion daily

the MOMENTS we got during nct world 2.0 were chefs kiss

they were both so chaotic while mark was frying eggs

“MARK WHAT ARE YOU DOING (⊹つ•۝•⊹)つ”

the oldest + youngest in the 99’ line remain iconic

lian hates him but loves him at the same time

because he’s nice to her but he SPENDS TOO MUCH OF HIS TIME MAKING FUN OF HER HEIGHT

“lian you’re like literally two feet tall i could fit you in my pocket”

“i will drop kick you in 2.5 seconds if you don’t shut the fuck up wong yukhei”

lucas once said that their favourite thing to do together was play at playgrounds

XIAOJUN + LIAN: XIAN

what you’ve all been waiting for

xiaojun went so long thinking that lian was chinese (∩╹□╹∩)

like she speaks mandarin perfectly, has a chinese stage name

IT WAS A REASONABLE MISTAKE LET HIM LIVE

when they met the first thing he said to her was how pretty she was

“y-you’re so pretty uhh”

*cue distressed xiaojun*

he followed lian on instagram before nct 2020 was even confirmed

dedication

he didn’t know jaehyun or yuta liked her and accidentally patted her head in front of them and called her cute

AND THAT WAS RHE DAY BEFORE THE WHOLE “xiaojun is terrified of yuta” THING HAPPENED

PLEASEHANDHJEJSB

they’d like to do a duet someday :)

he couldn’t get her lyrics from kick it out of his head when he first listened to the song

sometimes still quotes them around her to make her laugh

lian hyped his drama up SO MUCH !1!1!1!€]£<]~\£>€{

“dejunnie is having an acting debut soon !! please go support him and his cast~”

xiaojun brags about that a lot ... and her nickname for him :)

HENDERY + LIAN: LIANDERY

the teasing

THE MF TEASINF THEYRE SO ANNOYING

besties ™

they would occasionally message each other before and they considered themselves to be pretty close but when nct 2020 happened they were chaos

especially when they ended up in the work it unit together

everyone was so sick of them like they would not shut up about random ass things

hendery and lian are like another version of haechan and lian

but minus the lovey stuff they sometimes do

with liandery it’s constant teasing and making fun of each other 24/7

and it’s all fun and games so they can go DOWN if they’d like to

lian roasted him so hard once bye

they were supposed to be a pair on “it’s awkward but it’s ok”

but they developed such a good friendship within like two weeks that they had to switch up the members

hendery is kinda soft for her though ngl

he’ll just randomly poke her dimples

BUT HE WONT LIE AND SAY HE WASNT INTIMIDATED BY HER AT FIRST

it was just the way she presented herself at that time because she was a little frustrated, but it wasn’t anything that wouldn’t change later on

hendery thought she was older than him by like three years rip

YANGYANG + LIAN: YANGLIAN

when lian met yangyang she gained another child

but yangyang’s not a baby anymore (҂⌣̀_⌣́)

yet he’ll 100% act cute so that she does stuff for him

she’s not complaining though anything for her son

they’re like yangyang and ten all over again

once had a whole ass conversation through memes

it started with spongebob ended with shrek

lian now knows how to introduce herself in german thank you yangyang

not lian teaching yangyang toronto slang :’)

yangayng for some reason gave her big haechan energy when they first met

because the first thing he did was mock her height

he literally bent down and said “can you see me better”

lian: hello i saw you perfectly fine before my neck isn’t broken sir

but it was okay because now they have a really playful relationship with each other :D

have teamed up on numerous occasions to make kun’s life harder

“i thought the chaos stopped with yangyang, lian when did you become such a problem child?”

but lian gets special treatment because well .. she’s lian what do you think

yangyang calls her lili :)

[blueeyedbesson]

The Christmas Carol ~Pope Heyward~

summary: Pope hates Christmas. He hates everything about it. The carols. The singing. The colors. But when he falls for the new addition to the group, what lengths will he go to just to make sure she has a good Christmas?

word count: 1.6k

pairing: pope heyward x lea

warning: there might be 1 swear in there somewhere. not proofread. christmas

note: this is my Secret Santa gift for  @possiamo-andare​​. I hope you don’t mind but I used your name, instead of a reader insert. I really hope you enjoyed this. If not, I apologize for the quality. Times have been tough. But, I love you & wanted to make something good for you. Happy Holidays! 

Also, thank you @ijustreallylovethem​ for arranging this event for all of us. It must not have been easy pairing everyone.

masterlist

Pope was a very valuable asset to the Pogues. He was also a hard person to figure out. Everyone knew that.

One thing they did know about him, however, was the fact that he hated the Christmas season. Everything about it always managed to irritate him, even one little ornament.

His friends tried hard not to be cheerful around him during the season & up until last year, they had been successful.

That’s when Lea moved to the island & quickly bonded with all the Pogues. It all happened shortly before Christmas and since she didn’t know that Pope hated it, she was super happy to give him a great gift. He didn’t want to upset her so he smiled kindly at her and accepted the gift.

This year, everything started to change. Over the summer, Pope and Lea spent a lot of time together. That was mostly due to Kie spending more time at The Wreck, John B spending more time with Sarah & JJ never being around.

It was only natural that spending all this time together would create some kind of special bond that neither of them wanted to break. However, Pope couldn’t help the way he began to feel about her.

“JJ, what do you do when you have feelings for someone?”

“I’m not sure, Pope. I’ve never really had that connection with a girl before. I usually just hook up with one and then dump her the next morning.”

“I should’ve known that coming to you would be useless.”

“Hey, that’s offensive.” JJ acted like he was hurt but he knew it was the truth. “Look, if you really like this girl, why don’t you just tell her how you feel?”

“What if she doesn’t like me like that?”

“Then she’s stupid. Pope, you are my best friend, I know you haven’t been very lucky in the love department, but everyone gets their shot eventually. You’re a great guy & I don’t see why she wouldn’t love you.”

“Maybe.”

“Who is this girl anyway?”

“It’s um...it’s Lea.” Popes words stopped JJ in his tracks.

“Oh, the cute redhead?”

“Yeah. That’s the one.” Pope shoved his hands in his pockets & kicked the little bit of snow that had fallen this morning. They continued walking to the chateau.

“Good job, buddy.” JJ slapped his friend on his back and Pope flinched.

“I don’t need congratulations, JJ. I need help on how to impress her.”

“Okay. Well, what’s the one thing she loves more than anything?” JJ raised an eyebrow, knowing that Pope wasn’t going to like his idea.

“No. I’m not getting into Christmas just for her. I like her but nobody is worth that much change.”

“Then you’re on your own.”  JJ shrugged and plopped down on the couch on the porch. “Or maybe you should ask Kie. She’s bet friends with Lea. She might know what to do.”

“Yeah. Plus, she’s a lot smarter than you.” Pope sat on the small chair opposite his friend.

“Hey, fuck you.” JJ smiled. Within seconds, Kie was sitting next to JJ. 

“What a coincidence.” JJ smirked. “We were just talking about you.”

“What are you talking about, JJ?”

“Well, it seems that our darling little Pope here, has a crush on someone else we know.”

“Lea? I know.” she laughed along with JJ and Pope just rolled his eyes.

“I’ve been trying to tell him that if he wants to impress her, maybe he should get interested in Christmas.”

“That’s a great idea.” Kie looked over at Pope. “Nothing would make her happier than seeing you be cheerful on Christmas.”

“Why did I come to you guys for help? I’m not getting into Christmas. That’s the last I want to hear about it, okay?”

“Okay.” they chimed in together.

But it wasn’t the last he would hear about it. He went home that night & did some research on Christmas. He tried to figure out the best present to get her. He tried learning some Christmas traditions. But nothing good was coming across as a great idea. That’s when he remembered that Lea has mentioned her favorite Christmas carol on multiple occasion. He’s even caught her singing it more than  once.

So, he searched for the lyrics to the song and stayed up all night trying to learn them. 

For the week leading up to Christmas, Pope stayed home & tried putting together a little performance for her. He hardly saw anyone outside of his family.

“Does Pope hate me suddenly or something?” Lea questioned Kie & JJ as the trio decorated a tree at the chateau. She slowly placed an ornament on the branch in front of her.

“What? No. Of course not. He’s just been super busy helping his dad.” JJ quickly covered for his friend. He was the only one who knew what Pope had planned.

“Oh, okay.” Lea wasn’t convinced and her face fell. She knew he had been avoiding her and she thought it was because of something she said or did, and  JJ’s excuse only made her feel worse.

“He doesn’t hate you, Lea.” Kie tried comforting her friend but even she knew it wasn’t working. “He’ll be here tomorrow. Maybe you can talk to him about it then.”

“Yeah. Okay.” Still, she wasn’t sure of herself. If she was being honest, she had recently taken a liking to Pope. She wanted to tell him before Christmas but he had clearly made that difficult for her. 

She stayed silent for the rest of the night as they decorated the tree together.

The next morning, she rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling of chateau. It was finally Christmas day but she didn’t feel any cheer in her heart. All she felt was sadness, caused by the absence of Pope.

“Merry Christmas, bestie.” Kie plopped beside her with a cup of candy cane of hot cocoa. 

“Merry Christmas.” she sighed.

“What’s wrong? You’re usually cheery on Christmas.” she set her mug down on the table and looked at her friend. “Does it have something to do with Pope?”

“Yeah.” she sighed. “Why hasn’t he texted me or hung out with me for the past week? Is it something I did or said?”

“Actually, and I’m not supposed to tell you this, but he’s been home preparing something awesome for you.”

“He has? Why? I thought he hated Christmas.”

“I believe he still does.” Kie smiled. “But he wanted this year to be different for some reason. He helped his mom bake Christmas cookies & he helped his parents decorate the house & tree.”

“What’s gotten into our Pope?”

“I’m not sure.” she looked at her phone. “But he’s on his way here right now.”

“I should probably get dressed.” she threw the blanket off her legs and searched for the outfit she had set out. Instead of the clothes she put out last night, there was a onesie that matched the one Kie was wearing. “What’s going on?”

“Just put it on. It was JJ’s idea and we wouldn’t want to upset him in any way, right?”

“Okay, fine.” she slid the onesie over her pajamas and went to the living room. JJ was sitting on the couch and his face lit up when he saw the girls.

“Look how cute you two look in those onesies.” he smiled smugly, causing Kie to grab a pillow and hit him with it. “Ouch.”

“Merry Christmas, everyone.” Pope walked into the house and set his bag down beside the couch. “Hey, Lea.”

“Hey.” despite him ignoring her all week, she smiled widely at the sight of him.

“Okay, so what’s up buddy? Why are you suddenly so giddy about Christmas?” JJ asked, already knowing the answer. He was setting Pope up for Lea.

“Someone very special to me really loves this time of year & I thought it’d be nice to celebrate like she does.” he reached into his bag and handed presents to Kie & JJ. They opened they gifts and looked over at their friends. “Sorry, LEa. I didn’t have enough wrapping paper for your gift.”

“That’s okay.” she looked at him. “What is my present?”

“You’ll see.” he smiled and took off his jacket. The onesie he had on beneath made him look like Santa Claus, just like JJ. He put on the hat & looked at Lea. “I hope you like your present as much as I like you.” not realizing what he said, Pope began his rendition of Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree. He danced around and sang every lyric to that song, which was difficult for him. Pope didn’t like singing, carols or Christmas, but he would do anything for Lea.

When he was finished, he looked over at Lea, hoping to see her smile, only to see tears.

“No, please don’t cry, Lea. I thought you’d appreciate-”

“I do appreciate it. I loved that so much, Pope. It’s just that nobody has ever done something like that for me before.” 

“I wanted you to have a good Christmas. I know last year, I wasn’t the nicest guy during the holidays & I wanted to make it up to you.”

“Well, mission accomplished.” she smiled and looked at him. “Thank you, Pope. This was the best present I’ve ever received.”

“Anything for you.” he smiled and kept looking at her.

JJ looked over at Kie as she watched their friends. He nudged her arm when he noticed where they were standing. Her gaze followed his and she noticed the mistletoe as well.

“Hey guys, look up.” she giggled and looked at JJ. Pope and Lea looked up at the same time and JJ noticed their cheeks darken instantaneously. 

“Wow. The mistletoe.” Lea rocked on her feet awkwardly and Pope rubbed his neck.

“Are you okay with that?” Pope asked.

“Yeah. I think it’ll be fine.” she smiled and when Pope pulled her in for a kiss, JJ & Kie jumped off the couch and cheered while high fiving each other.

“Yes! Finally!”

[scatterpatter]

15 w Corren!

15: What is your characters background story?

OHOHO, so I’m going to leave One Detail Out because there’s one part of his backstory I don’t wanna spoil for Jazz yet, but... >:3c

Also it’s under the cut because i totally infodumped and then some OOPSIE

oh also cws: serious illness, death, domestic violence, depression

Corren Hartwell grew up the youngest of 3 siblings, the oldest being his big sis Mila and the middle child being his bro Julian. Their parents were pretty detached emotionally, but that’s pretty par for the course where he was from, and they provided for the kids so it really wasn’t all that bad. Not a perfect family, no fam ever is, but they were happy.

His race’s culture is super inclined to intelligence and studying technology, the mind, etc, so Corren spent his childhood being a total bookworm. Studying history, arcana, all sorts of stuff... he never really minded it, though. He was actually quite good at what he did! 

Mila was a spellcaster- I honestly forgot what school of magic she was in OOPS, and Julian dual-classed as a Necromancer and Bard! Jules and Mila were both pretty close in age, and they were like besties on top of being siblings, and they’d often team up to do small adventuring jobs: hit up the help wanted board in town and take care of short deliveries or a monster stalking a farm or something like that- both for the thrill and to also earn some extra gold for the family. They loved Corren, but they couldn’t take him with them because it was too dangerous for him since he was still just a little kid. Still, Corren admired them and wanted to be just like them(better, even?) when he grew up! ... Oh yeah I always forget this detail but Corren’s totally trans XD He came out pretty young but his family was chill with it so like... ayyyeee

Though one day, Mila started getting sick. Corren doesn’t really know what it was, but for whatever reason she wasn’t able to heal from it with simple healing spells. It was a slow process, but she was just getting worse instead of better, and one day she passed. The family was a wreck, understandably. The issue is... Corren and Julian had... different ways of grieving. Corr was still young, the equivalent of like someone 10-12 in human years, so he didn’t fully grasp the concept of death just yet. He retreated into himself a lot, had trouble grounding himself to the present and really struggling with depression. Julian, about the equivalent of someone 16-18, had a better understanding of what was going on, but he was wrecked. He wanted their sister back, and was so upset he couldnt do anything... but he wanted to try. He ended up doing something rash, and... well, spoilers ;) (dont worry he didnt hurt Corren or anyone else, but... he Fucked Up in what he tried doing)

Things quickly went downhill from there for the Hartwells. There was often a lot of fighting between Julian and their parents, or Corren would be chided for being unable to focus, like, at all, and... Corren and Jules never really fought, but there was a clear rift between them after what happened. They still loved each other, but it was so obvious their relationship would never be like what it was when Mila was still around, and that hurt both of them so much.

A few months later, things reached a boiling point and Julian was kicked out of their home. Before he left, though, he found Corren and gave him something: a small amethyst pendant on a necklace chain, something Julian used to always wear. They made a promise that this wasn’t gonna be goodbye, that they’d find each other again, and then Jules was gone. It was just Corren and his mom and dad.

Things were still strained, and Corren just did his best to keep to his studies to distract himself from everything. Not wanting Corren to end up like his brother, his parents forbade anything necrotic in the magic he learned. The problem was... Corren still loved Julian. And still wanted to be like him, to a point, so... he would study necromancy in secret. It was kinda like his little lifeline like “hey Jules is still here to an extent if I know the spells he does”, and things seemed to be going okay, for the most part

Well uh... one day his father caught him practicing his necromancy and... well, was far from happy about it. An argument quickly erupted between them both, a lot of yelling back and forth, and before Corr could react properly, his father grabbed something from the desk and struck him with it, giving him a pretty bad cut across his right eye(the smol scar I always draw? Yeah...). In a panic, Corren’s flight of fight kicked in as he cast a magic missile at his father in retaliation. Corren isn’t sure if his attack just stunned, knocked out, or killed his father, but the flight of fight-or-flight kicked in as he just ran from the situation. He had no idea what he was to do or where to go, but he just knew he couldn’t go back home after that.

SO this poor kid, probably the equivalent of a 14-15 y/o, is out on his own now... and he sure does his best. He mainly spends his time hopping from town to town, taking up small jobs to get some gold in his pockets, and is just... focusing on surviving. Going from this sheltered lifestyle to suddenly on the streets was a wake-up call and then some, but he found ways to make it work. Luckily his background of studying all the time gave him enough intelligence to take up tasks others weren’t as capable of, but it was still... far from easy. But he made it work!

One day he’s in a city known as Lilenthemar, just taking a break in one of the town squares, when an Elven man takes a seat on the bench next to him. They both sit in a comfortable silence for a while... but the elf then strikes a conversation. Corren, socially awkward like no tomorrow, tries to keep up the conversation... key word tries. The man introduces himself as Jethro, and I imagine the conversation took a turn like this:

Jethro: I don’t see many Marelienths around here, are you new in town?

Corren: Yeah, just passing through I guess. ... Gotta say, wasn’t expecting to see the Dragon Saint of the Green as I came here, though.

Jethro, laughing: Ah, yes, Raerose. Don’t worry, he’s a kind dragon. Though, it’s certainly surprising to those who are new to the city.

Corren: Oh, no, I know all about Raerose and his connections to this city and the Edgewoods. I just wasn’t expecting to... you know, run into his path as quickly as I did.

Jethro: Oh, so you’ve done your research, I take it?

At that point, Corren does what any neurodivergent would do when asked about his hobbies: Infodumps the hell out of what he knows. He’s far from a great scholar, considering he’s only the equivalent of someone 16-21ish at this point and spent quite a few years away from studying in favor of surviving, but he was still very intelligent and knowledgable about what he talked about. Jethro, picking up on this, decided to offer Corren a temporary position as a Family Historian. Jethro was actually a noble, something Corr somehow didn’t pick up on, and not only could’ve used the help... but also, he kiiiinda picked up on the fact that Corren looked like a kid who could use a place to stay for a while. Corren, not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, immediately accepted the offer.

Now, Corren wasn’t intending to stay for long. A few months, maybe a year or two... but. He realized he was building a pretty stable life by having a consistent job for the elf- it didn’t make much sense to just leave that in favor of hopping from place to place with no purpose. Not to mention, he was actually growing quite close to his boss. They’d often spent time together during off-hours, sitting in a comfortable quiet, just taking comfort in each other’s presence. Jethro’s actually the only one Corren ever opened up to about his past, and over the years Corren really grew to love him in a strong platonic way. They both struggled with their own grieving, Jethro with his passed wife and son he hadn’t seen in years, and Corren with his passed sister and brother he hadn’t seen in years, which only helped them grow closer, since they understood each other’s pain, in a sense.

He still struggled with depression, but overall Corren was doing pretty damn well in life. ... Many years later, Corren being 44(idk which human-equivalent this would be. Mid-Late 20s? Early 30s?), actually gets to meet Jethro’s son, Jericho, and the party he traveled with... called the F.U.C.K.s. ... I couldn’t make this shit up even if I tried. They needed help getting to a place called the Menoa Tree, which Corren happened to have studied for a long while, so he offered to help the party. ... They totally broke him with their antics. He proceeded to have a mental breakdown in front of them, and essentially went “FUCK THIS IM GOING HOME AND TAKING A NAP”. Jethro got a laugh out of the furious rambling Corren came home with.

... But despite that, something stuck with him. He just couldn’t quite get the party out of his mind. Something about them, as frustrating as they were, was almost... magnetic? ... Well, weeks later, word came to Lilenthemar about a war that had been raging on for years now... but specifically of a battle at a city known as Joshua, the forces being lead by Jericho alongside many others. Jethro was of course worried about his boy... and Corren... well, something in him changed. He wanted to know more about the FUCKs and just WHAT their deal was, and he wanted to ease Jethro’s worries, so... he grabbed a sniper rifle and decided that he’d go help protect Jericho and his friends as they fought. 

He eventually caught up to the party, convinced them to let him help, and after many battles... the war was won(Corren kinda came in at the tail-end of it all). The only thing is... after that, Corren didn’t really want to go home just yet. He actually enjoyed spending time with the party... and then it clicked: They were powerful adventurers who were totally crazy, stupid, and had no sense of self-preservation... they were just like Julian. And Corren loved it, even when they drove him crazy. He felt alive, which is something he realized he hadn’t felt in a long time... and quickly grew attached to his party, Alistair now taking the reigns as leader as Jericho retired from adventuring. And, well, he’s stuck with them ever since!

He still has Julian’s amethyst, as they’ve yet to reunite(yknow, assuming Jules is still alive even), but... certain events are causing some concern with the story I’m telling. Mainly... Corren is slowly facing Aboleth Corruption(he doesn’t know this yet, but is starting to suspect there’s something wrong with him), and that’s causing parts of his memory to be... patchy. Certain things aren’t lining up, and there could be more(or just different altogether) pieces of this story than what I’ve just told... but we’ll have to wait and see until we get to the quest that deals with that before we find out what’s REALLY going on ;)

... HEY UM I HOPE YALL DONT MIND THE IMMENSE INFODUMP IF YOU MADE IT THIS FAR THEN THANK U FOR CARING ABT MY BOI ;-;

[rebelminxy]

It’s in the Little Things

Pairing: Jared Padalecki x Reader

Warning: Fluff, pure fluff, and mention of heartbreak

A/N: This will be the first of five pieces I am doing for Bug’s 100 follower challenge (or @1000roughdrafts if y’all didn’t know)! Again, congrats on reaching 100 and can’t wait to watch you grow even more darling! Hope you enjoy what I post in honor of your celebration! Prompt will be in bold. Of course, this is done for purely fiction purpose only. Much love and respect to the Padalecki family.

               Six months.

              It took six months for Jared to make a small crack at the wall around your heart. When you got the job at the Family Business Beer Company, your best friend almost had a heart attack. She was a huge fan of the show, Supernatural, and made you watch all 13 seasons. You thought it was a good show but nothing to make you go hoopla like her. Even your boss, Danneel Ackles, had asked first and foremost if you were a fan of the show. But you made it clear you were there to work, proving it when Jensen came in one day and all you did was greet him, moving back quickly to continue cleaning the counter. It was when he returned a few months later while on hiatus that you met Jared Padalecki.

              He really was a gentle giant like your best friend said. After a quick ‘hello’ and handshake, you couldn’t help but admire his wide smile. Made you wish you could smile like him. All carefree and without a second thought. He would come in almost every day to hang out with your bosses, behaving childlike when he was bored. Whenever fans would come in, you would watch how he and Jensen would willingly take pictures and sign things for them, thank them for coming by and to enjoy the place. Every fan would tell you how lucky you were to work there. But luck wasn’t in your vocabulary.

              Well, not at first.

“Hey, (Y/N),” Danneel said as you counted the register for the night. “We are throwing a barbecue at my place tomorrow, maybe take a boat out on the river behind the house. You are welcome to join us.”

“Umm, I think it would be best for me to catch up on some stuff I need to do since it’s an off day.”

“C’mon (Y/N), you have been working here for the past six months and have yet to attend to one of our get-togethers. Just come by for an hour or two and enjoy the company a bit.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive! Jay and I would love to have you over. The kids have been dying to show you their rooms and…Jared will be there,” Danneel said that last part playfully.

“Would be nice to see the kids…”

              Danneel sighed and patted you on the shoulder.

“Tomorrow at four, ok. Don’t forget your bathing suit either.”

====================

              When you arrived at the Ackles home, it didn’t really surprise you how big and beautiful their home was. They immediately welcomed you into their home, JJ and the twins guiding you around as they gave you a tour. You couldn’t help but feel how homely it was, reminding you of the days back when you still lived at home with your parents. Jensen and Danneel were out on the patio cooking while you played with the kids in the living room. You enjoyed spending time with them, growing to love them very quickly. That’s when you all heard a knock at the door. JJ ran towards it, you get up to follow the child to watch her. When you reached the front door, you watch as Jared lifts little JJ in his arms and twirls her in the air, her screams of joy causing you to smile.

“You really do know how to smile.”

              You shook your head quickly to stop from smiling.

“No, no, don’t stop because I noticed. It’s just, I never got to see you smile. Danneel was right, you do have a beautiful smile.”

              You couldn’t help the gasp that escaped your lips, couldn’t ignore how hot your face was turning. It wasn’t just the words, it was the look in his eyes, something in them was telling you how honest he was being. You watched as he let JJ go, her running back inside as you stood there, a bit in shock still. Jared closed the door behind him and walked up to you, smiling his typical childlike smile and looked down, brushing his hair behind his ear.

“Mr. Padalecki…”

“What have I told you about calling me that?”

“Umm…Jar…Jared. I do smile.”

“Yeah, but it’s never really genuine. Danneel brags about how you and the kids get along and that she gets to see a real smile from you with them. Glad I finally got to witness it in person.”

“In…person?”

              Jared then took his phone out of his pocket and fooled with it for a few seconds. He then turned the screen towards you and your eyes grew wide in shock. There, on the screen, was an image of you with the children in the back area of the brewery, Zeppelin on your back as the girls ran behind you. You could see the wide smile on your face, how much joy was there. You looked up at Jared and he locked his phone and placed it back into his pocket.

“Danneel sent it to Jensen and I got him to send it to me. Just, really loved how happy you look in it,” he whispered as he looked down to his feet. “Pretty girl like you should smile like that every second of the day.”

              And that moment, you felt the small crack against the wall you built around your heart.

====================

“Wait, so Jared invited you to Vancouver?”

“Well, Danneel and the kids are going, and she knows the only traveling I’ve done is my move to Austin…”

“BUT JARED ASKED YOU RIGHT?!”

              You winced at your best friend as she screamed through your headphones. You were packing a small bag for the weekend trip up to Vancouver. You had to call her to calm your nerves about the trip.

“Yeah but like I said…”

“Oh, bestie! Do you have any idea how lucky you are! Not only have you been welcomed into the Ackles family, but you are traveling to visit the set of the show AND getting a personal tour by none other than JARED FREAKING PADALECKI!”

“It’s nothing special…”

“How is it not…you do realize ever since he convinced you to exchange numbers you two have been in contact nonstop? And when he travels back home, where and who does he spend most of his time with?”

“We are just friends.”

“You might see it as just friends, but he has to want more.”

              You winced again and pulling your knees up to your chest, wrapping your arms tight around them. Your best friend watched via camera your reaction and sighed.

“You can’t let the past dictate your future. You even left your hometown to get away from it all.”

“I know but it’s still hard, after everything it’s still hard,” you whispered into the mic.

“Yet when you talk about those text and phone calls, I see a crack of a smile.”

              You couldn’t help the small smile that came out.

“See, plus he has been very patient with you. He doesn’t push, and he has done so much to show you really does care.”

              You deviated the conversation quickly with talk of the trip, your best friend making you promise to get as many pictures as you could, before ending the video call. As you closed your laptop, you thought back on her words.

              ‘You can’t let the past dictate your future.’

              You knew she was right. The past was the past, but you couldn’t help holding on to that fear, the fear of another heartbreak. You swore to protect your heart after picking up the pieces, building a reinforced concrete wall around it. But little by little, Jared had chipped off pieces of that wall. You did your best to cover up the cracks and missing pieces, but Jared had made his mark.

His kind words, his way of trusting you with things he wouldn’t tell anyone else. He would spend hours at the brewery, keeping you company when he was in Austin. Eventually, when you gave in to hanging out, he took you around Austin and showed you his favorite places in the city during one of his breaks. He would share his favorite books with you when he found out you loved to read and read the ones you favored. He always paid attention to the smallest details of your conversations. He even sent you flowers and your favorite cake for your birthday while he was out in Vancouver shooting.

              And he never missed a day to call you. You would wake up to a good morning text and fall asleep to the sound of his voice on the other end of your cell phone. No matter how much you tried to deny it, Jared had won you over little by little. And even though you loved the butterflies in your stomach every time you heard his voice or looked into his eyes, that underlining fear would bubble right up.

====================

              The flight to Vancouver was a bit stressful, it is your second time on a plane. But Danneel and the kids were the perfect distraction. When the four of you made it to Vancouver, there was a big man waiting outside. Danneel introduced him as Clif, the guys' bodyguard and best friend. He made the ride to the apartment fun by giving you a chance to sightsee during the ride. Once you at the apartment, he helped bring up the luggage to Jensen’s apartment and let you and Danneel know the guys would be home in an hour and would have the weekend off as promised. As you began to unpack in the guest room, Danneel came in with two glasses of red wine, handing one to you.

“Here is to a safe trip and fun times in Vancouver.”

              The clinking of the glass made you giggle before taking a sip.

“So, what are the plans with Jared? He did beg me to hire a babysitter if Jensen and I wanted to go out so as not to ask you.”

“Not sure, he just said he would handle everything.”

“Oooh, are things moving up the ladder?”

              You smiled and lightly punched Danneel on her arm, causing a laugh out of her.

“I’m not sure. We are great friends and I honestly don’t want to mess that up.”

“Hmm, well I can clearly say Jared wants more than friendship. But knowing him, he will take what he can get.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean, if you make it clear you only want to be friends, he won’t cross any lines even if he wants to. He is never one to push, that’s for sure.”

              You nodded as you took another sip of wine. Danneel was right, Jared never pushed for anything, more so taking his time.

“Just, remember, you aren’t the only one with feelings in the mix here. Be clear with him and trust me, he will understand.”

              You nodded, sucking your lips in as Danneel smiled at you. She patted your shoulder and walked out of the guest room, leaving you to your thoughts. You wondered, how serious was Jared about wanting more? And would he really understand your hesitation?

====================

              Your weekend in Vancouver was the best time. The moment the guys got home on Friday, Jared took you out to dinner. Nothing fancy, just a quick meal at a burger place he loved. You both sat there for hours, just talking and eating. Before you knew it, the place was closing for the night. You were so surprised how time flew by with just you two talking. Instead of taking you somewhere else, Jared took you back to the apartment, wishing you sweet dreams at the door. He tried to move in for a hug, but as usual, you backed away slightly. You hated yourself for doing that, but like always, Jared just smiled away and bid you goodnight, heading to the elevator to go up to his place.

              That night you went to bed mentally slapping yourself for not even able to give him a hug.

              Saturday was a fun day. Jared took you to bike riding in Stanley Park to enjoy a nice breakfast at a small café. Later you went to the Museum of Anthropology where you spent a couple of hours just looking and admiring. Then, he took you onto the set where all the filming happened. He showed you each set from the show and even let you take a few pictures for your best friend to send to her. He even dragged you to his trailer, which made your mouth drop from the size of it.

“This is huge for a trailer,” you gasped.

“If we have long days of shooting, we will sleep here so they got us ones that we felt comfortable in.”

              For lunch, he took you to an Italian restaurant on Commercial drive. And after that straight to the aquarium. You both looked in awe at the sea animals and fishes the aquarium had. He laughed along with you as you told him the story of how every time your parents took you to the aquarium when you were small, that you would run up to one of the workers and ask where the octopus was. After the aquarium, he took you to dinner at this restaurant close to the apartment. Again, you both sat there for hours, laughing, talking and eating. It was two in the morning when you made it back to the apartment and he bid you goodnight. He never made a move to hug you, but the urge to hug him was inside you. Instead, you let him walk away and headed inside, shutting the door quietly to not wake everyone up.

              Sunday was barbecue day with the Ackles and Jared. A few other folks from the show were there as well. Jared introduced you to everyone and suck to your side, knowing how nervous you got meeting new people. But you had fun, doing your best to be friendly and joke along with everyone. The food was delicious, and, in the end, you and Jared got stuck with cleaning the dishes as everyone relaxed after the meal. It was almost sunset when Jared asked you if you would go with him to the roof. You said yes and you both snuck out of the apartment like children, taking the elevator up to the top floor to then reach the door to the rooftop. Once you were both up there, you sat down on the cement roofing to watch the sunset, admiring the beauty in silence.

              Once the sun had set, and the night sky began to shine with stars, Jared spoke up.

“(Y/N), I want to tell you something, something I can’t hold back anymore.”

              You took in a breath, not able to look at him as your heart began to beat fast.

“I… ever since I met you, life has seemed better, brighter even. Getting to know you this past year, it’s been the greatest moments of my life. And, you make me feel like... like I can hope for a better future, a future I can share with someone.”

“Jared…”

“I just want you to know, no matter what, I won’t force you into accepting my feelings. I just want you to know that I’ve fallen in love with you.”

              You kept quiet for a few minutes, processing what he just said.

“(Y/N)? Are you okay?”

              You pulled your knees up to your chest, wrapping your arms around them, going into your cocoon.

“(Y/N), if it’s too much, we can just be frie…”

“Did Danneel ever tell you why I moved to Austin?”

“No, she never wanted to say.”

              You took in a shuddering breath before you started.

“I was engaged to be married before my move. Was with him for almost eight years when he proposed. Wedding plans were made, and I even bought my dress. I was madly in love with him and trusted him with my heart. I thought everything was right in life. But the night before our wedding, he ran off with someone else, leaving a note behind how he was only settling with me because he felt too comfortable. That I was safe.”

              You heard Jared gasp, making you continue.

“I was safe, and he was never in love with me. He fell out of love years ago but only tolerated because he didn’t want to hurt me. But after he proposed, he met someone else and felt like he was doing wrong by marrying me since he fell for her. But he didn’t know how to tell me he wanted to end things. So, when it was the day before our wedding, he panicked and ran. His letter was his way of letting me down easy.”

“How could he…?”

“Oh, that’s not it. Two weeks after our wedding got called off, his parents were throwing him and that girl a wedding. They had only known each other for a couple of months and felt so sure of her that he married her. He married her, the girl that he loved, not tolerated. I spent eight years with that man and all I had to show was a canceled wedding and an invitation thrown in my face.”

“He sent you an invite?”

              You could hear the anger in Jared’s voice.

“Not only an invite, but he was also asking me to be his fiancée’s maid of honor. That I could help out planning it all since I knew everything about putting up a wedding.”

“That ass…”

“Yeah, and since my hometown is on the small side, I was on the rumor mill for weeks afterward. The girl that lost her man to some random. So, I moved, went to Austin since it was far and quiet. Once Danneel gave me the job, she asked me why I moved there, and I spilled, thinking she should know at least the truth so she wouldn’t think I was some fangirl.”

“I am so sorry about what happened, (Y/N),” Jared whispered. “I understand why you wouldn’t want to get involved with someone. Don’t worry, we can act like this never happened and stay friends.”

“But that’s the thing, Jared, I don’t want to be just friends.”

              You turned to face Jared, your eyes were watery with tears.

“I have always had trust issues ever since, putting up a wall so as not to get hurt again. It sucks but I felt it was the best way to protect myself, to not feel the pain I felt. Learning how to trust someone is the hardest thing I’d ever have to do, but with you… you’ve made it so easy.”

              Jared’s eyes grew wide as he looked into yours. You reached out and grabbed hold of his hand, tightly.

“Ever since that day you showed me that picture Danneel sent you, you have been chipping away at my wall. And no matter how many times I tried to repair it, you would come right back and remove more. Every little thing you did, each precious moment chipped away at that wall. You showed me that maybe, I can throw myself out there again, to trust again. I know it won’t be easy, but I have to try. And if it’s with you, then maybe the jump won’t be so bad.”

              Jared grabbed both your hands and looked you dead in the eye, his shining so bright with love.

“You can jump because I will be there to catch you. I know it will take me a bit to prove myself to you, but I promise my love for you is real and I will do everything in my power to never hurt you to that capacity. Yeah, it’s a bit fast to say this, but I can’t see myself spending my life with anyone else but you. I hope one day you will come to see that truth.”

              At his words, you smiled brightly, feeling the wall crumble down to reveal your heart. You knew the risks of putting yourself out there, but something inside you made it clear, this time, you would fall in the arms of the right person. You leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his lips, chaste and sweet which he responded to. Once you pulled away, you pulled your hands out of his and wrapped them around him in a hug, molding your body into his. He wrapped his arms around you, his face pressing into the crook of your neck.

“I love you, (Y/N),” he whispered into your skin.

“And I love you, Jared.”

Tags:

@coffee-obsessed-writer @tumbler-tidbits

[honeykngdom]

souvenir for the road | fangs x reader

WARNINGS: mentions of alcohol, angst PROMPT: “You’re a Serpents who’s afraid of snakes.” A/N: I actually had a really hard time figuring out what kind of twist I wanted this story to have - while it is a fic written for @southsidejuggie‘s writing challenge; it’s the first Fangs fic I’ve posted and I really wanted to be nothing less than the best I can offer for such a small, neglected character. I sincerely hope you all enjoy! 

August 24th, 2017

Feet dangling over the ledge, I lifted the bottle back to my lips; the burning sensation travelled from my nose to my stomach, encouraging me to take a few deep breaths before I held it out. “Where did you get this? Why did you get Jäger?” I asked sourly, mouth pinched together.

He rips the bottle from my hand, eyes set into a hard glare before he tilts his head back and swallows a mouthful, “Jäger is delicious.” My eyes rolls, prompting him to continue, “Mix this with Goldschlager, and you’ve got yourself liquid cocaine.” 

“That sounds like a bad time.” I retorted wearily, leaning back on my hands. The night was unreasonably quiet and still; the water beneath us flowed silently, the crickets in the long grass on either side of Sweetwater River played their gentle melodies. It had been Fangs idea to drive out and sit on the ledge of the bridge, split a bottle in a toast to the summer days coming to an end — to celebrate. After months of building the courage, Fangs had finally gotten his chance to undergo the initiation process. 

Of course, this was all to be kept a secret from his mother. The mother whom I loved dearly, the mother who welcomed me into her home on numerous occasions, the mother I couldn’t stand to see in a state of unhappiness, or worry. He had made me promise not to tell her — and as much as I loved her, my loyalty to her son would always come first. Always. 

I stared at the bandage on his arm, watching as he inspected the freshly inked tattoo. His eye was still swollen, and his lip had a rather sizable split in the corner. “Are you sure this is what you want?” I asked quietly, returning my gaze to my hands folded in my lap. 

I was surprised when my question prompted him to sigh loudly into the night and fall back with his arms raised above his head. I examined the cuts and bruises on his fingers and knuckles, poking the nearly healed scabs on his palm. Fangs hissed in response, fist clenching tightly; I offered him a sad smile in apology and took the bottle at his side. “She’s dating losers.” He started quietly, although its softness didn’t hide his annoyance. Confused as to what he was talking about, I allowed him to continue,  “I’ve gotta do something that’ll offer her some sort of protection.” 

He was referring to his mother — this made more sense. “Paul wasn’t so bad.” I tried optimistically, tilting my head back to swallow another mouthful of the dark liquor. 

“And the Serpents aren’t so bad — there’s less of us than Ghoulies. We aren’t into drugs or racing. Just all about family loyalty and shit like that.” I quirked a brow as he paused, thinking to himself before he started to laugh — loudly. 

“What?” I asked, watching as his hands came down to clutch his stomach and he rolled onto his side, face pressing into the pavement of the bridge. “What?” I asked again, this time louder. 

“You wanna know what’s really funny?” He asked in between fits of giggles, resting his hands on his aching stomach as he stared up into the night, “I fucking hate snakes.” 

I blinked, hoping for a small moment that he was kidding, but when he continued to rest against the warm pavement, I let my eyes fall shut and dropped my head, holding the bottle between my knees. “So, you’re a Serpent who’s afraid of snakes.” I laughed once, shaking my head before I lifted my eyes and stared out at the river. “Great.”  

September 25th, 2017

I sat in the first seat just outside their chained fence, somehow still trying to remain close to my friends. So many of them had fallen into cycle after their parents, and if not their parents then their siblings or peers. Your loyalty in the Southside mattered to these groups of people that stood as one solidified unit of trust and unity and respect. Who you lie with defines who you are as a person, and that was a simple fact. 

I lifted my eyes, catching a quick smile and brow raise before he returned his attention to his new live-in bestie, Sweet Pea. Since his initiation, Fangs had started to fall into step with his fellow brothers like it was second nature. Like he was finally becoming the person he only ever believed he could be. And while his intentions were pure and good, they were equally dangerous. That made him all the more terrifying — he was all in. He wanted to feel everything all at once, and he wanted it raw. 

The Serpents were able to provide him with solid protection and family loyalty — to ensure his mothers well-being at all times. Being the man of the house could be exhausting, that much I knew. I watched the mornings he would arrive at school with tired eyes and sleepy smiles, each one always paired with disarrayed bedhead and thick heavy hoodies. He loved having his hair played with, at any time. How many lunch periods had I sat in the library with him so he could nap, and lull him to sleep by scratching his skull lightly with my nails. 

Now, no one played with his hair or lulled him to sleep. Sleepy Fangs never existed in this new version of himself; he was always, always on high alert. Always. Like he had to drink an extra large instead of a medium,l or have a red bull with his bagel. No one touched anyone, unless it was aggressively. Punching, slapping, hard back pats — you name it. It was intense and intimate. The only thing that made anyone on the outside more uncomfortable than the rough behaviour? Their calm and lulled conversation, when they’re in each other’s ears and careful, because something terrible was going to happen. And it was going to happen soon.

Wasn’t the point of joining in unity to protect the Southside is to be approachable, not intimidating?

But he was always Fangs whenever it was just the two of us, that much I was sure. While I ceased to exist within the school halls, I could count on gossip, and long walks home after class. We’d still do Sunday brunches at Pop’s — chicken waffles and milkshakes. We still called each other if the other was up late and couldn’t sleep, just because the screen hurt his eyes and he hated texting (his thumbs are just too damn big).  

Yeah, he was still in there. This version of him was exclusive to few people while he earned and grew into his hard exterior. He grew his stubble out longer, making him appear older, and started dressing the part. 

Couldn’t have lied to him if I wanted to, he looked too damn good in that leather jacket. 

There was a day he walked me home from Pop’s because he wanted to make sure I got in okay; we split a mickey (courtesy of Mama Fogarty’s  girl’s night out), and took the long path around the park instead of straight through. 

“I feel like you should be with your friends.” I started, staring at my shoes as we walked, hands shoved deep into my pockets. “Aren’t you like .. obligated to be with the community in all  your free time if you’re not with VIP’s like ma?”

“You’re not a VIP anymore?” He asked, clearly amused by my poor word choice. “C’mon, it’s not that bad. Ma gets her time, you get your time, I get me time.” Fangs smiled, holding up the empty mickey. 

I chucked it into the bushes, “Your time? What exactly are you doing in your time?”

“Y’know, the running, resistance, lifting shit.” He started to flex his muscles, brows wiggling in a very ha-ha Funny Man Fangs way. “Gotta keep the hot bod.” 

“Uh huh.” I laughed, deviating my eyes from his biceps. 

He snorted, “What, you don’t wanna look? Everyone else does, they made me cut off all my sleeves on my shirts.” 

I remember, I wanted to say but didn’t. Instead, I kicked a rock in his path, laughing when he kicked it up and away with his foot. We shared a knowing look, before he nudged me with his arm and sighed, “Lemme hear it, baby. What is it? I’m not pretty enough for you?” He laughed once and stopped to look at me, “Nah, we both know you’ve had it bad for me for years.” 

I stared at him over my shoulder for a moment; his smile was smug and sure, but eyes still appeared soft and warm,q so I caved. I turned to look at him and shook my head in annoyance, “So full of yourself; it’s becoming pathetic how much you sound like the Serpent Drama King.” Fangs knew better than anyone how self-righteous Sweet Pea could be with his alpha male attitude. Over the top, but hot and charming, nonetheless. 

Fangs fingers hooked into my belt loops, and he pulled me into his hips roughly, pulling the breath from my lungs. His eyes darkened, lips falling into my smile with a tainted twist. Something darker, more intense. I inhaled deeply, pursing my lips tightly as he examined my reaction, and then the intensity melted away, and his hands relaxed onto the exposed skin above my hips, holding me close. “Am I wrong?”

I shook my head once, tearing my eyes from his gaze. “Don’t.” 

“There’s still a lotta firsts we promised each other.” He reminded me, swaying his hips with mine. “I don’t know why you don’t let it happen anymore.” 

“Because it means more to one of us than the other.” I snapped, meeting his eyes with a hard glare. Fangs blinked, considering this for a moment before he dropped his hands and took a small step back. 

“That’s what you think?” He asked, almost amused, “That it’s just you?” 

“It is just me.” I hissed, unwilling to meet his eyes again. “So don’t.” It’ll complicate everything more — how unbiased could I be in the Southside with a Serpent for a boyfriend? That kind of influence? “Please don't.” 

“Who said I didn’t want that?” He asked abruptly, suddenly in my face (his eyes were swimming, but the intensity remained). “You can’t just assume.” 

I shook my head with a smile, taking another step away from him, “Everyone’s already thinking it,” I shrugged, adjusting the strap on my bag. “So it’s just better if you don’t.” 

Fangs squinted, a smile tugging at his lips, “Not even a souvenir for the road?” 

I paused, licking my lips slowly as I considered his words; I then took a step forward with a nod, no more than two seconds later he had roughly attached his lips to mine and tangled his fingers into my hair. And soon as I reacted, everything balanced. Hands traveled, our tongues worked against each other as though we were insatiable. When we finally parted, chests heaving and lips stretched in large smiles, he leaned down to gently lift my chin up and press his lips to mine, much softer this time. 

“See ya around, Pigeon.” He patted my backside as I turned, tongue running along his bottom lip before he retreated across the street towards the park. 

God, I wish I hadn’t let that night happen.

October 19th, 2017

I had been busier this year peer tutoring with the influx of Serpents; FPs absence was making the group anxious, so the younger gen had grown nearly doubled in size since the summer. Like they were preparing, knowing they would need numbers. Due to dedicating most of my lunch periods to tutoring, I wasn’t able to sit outside the fence as much, and therefore didn’t see Fangs within the school halls at all.

Which was fine — until one day his greeting in the morning across the parking lot had gone from a shared friendly smile to just simply a look. The first day he didn’t offer a smile, I felt my chest tighten, and my mood instantly dropped. After the first week, it stopped hurting. I usually waited until he and his friends and gone inside for the day, and if necessary, I walked around to the east wing door. 

He finally landed his hands on the motorcycle he had been helping Julio with in the shop over the summer. This meant we couldn't’ walk home together — and I was excited for him until I realized neither of us was willing to go without a helmet, so I had to walk as he rode off with his friends. 

We had only had Sunday brunch once in the last three weeks, and the brunch we had resulted in a lot of uncomfortable silence. Fangs was unable to talk about FP or what was going on with the Serpents, which I ultimately respected since they still scared the crap out of me in general. There was only so much I could fill him in on, and in all honesty, Fangs seemed too preoccupied and on edge for me to believe he was really paying attention to a word I was saying. 

So I didn’t bother to reach out and speak to him anymore.

There was that one day we bumped into each other at Mel’s; he was helping Mama Fogarty with the grocery haul, and I had walked in to grab some milk and conditioner (still used the strawberry, just because I knew it was his favourite. I still hated it). 

“Oh, hey.” Fangs waved, pulling his lips back in a warm, familiar grin as he took a step towards me. “How’s tutoring going?” It had been his idea for me to volunteer, having always prided me on my strengths. 

I shrugged, hugging the milk carton to my stomach, “Busier that normal, but it’s mainly just lack of patience, so it’s a working progress.” 

His mother — with her bright and beaming smile — came around the corner and rushed towards me, wrapping her arms around my frame in excitement, “Oh, baby! How are you?” She asked, rubbing my arms. 

Fangs’ mother was a wonderful woman; there was no getting around that. Only thirty-seven, having had Fangs during her teen years, made her the poster child for the typical Southside mom: single and fun. She had a warm, vibrant soul, and when necessary, she had her dark moments. Over the years, it wasn’t too difficult to tell where Fangs got all of his humor and anger from. 

After the awkward confirmation that neither of us had been able to see the other in nearly a month, she tsked her son and apologized for his rudeness. Reminding him that she didn’t raise him to be anything but a gentleman — or something like that, she always started to speak Spanglish when she got angry with him. She invited me over for dinner the following night — I promised to think about it and let Fangs know. I had to excuse myself shortly after, casting them a final smile before I darted for the self-checkout. 

I spent the remainder of my night thinking about the last time I had tasted him, the last time I had run my hands eagerly over his muscled chest, and how it could’ve been so much more. How all of the first times could’ve been fulfilled that night, and I had done everything I could to try and keep a distance to avoid any shift in my bias. 

I wish I had just gone for dinner. 

December 4th, 2017 

The head staff member for the peer tutoring organization at Southside High was imprisoned, and then later killed by the Black Hood. With nothing to do at lunch, I still didn’t sit outside of the fenced area that contained what was left of my friends. It was too bitter and heartbreaking, seeing him them all the time. It was better if I sat at my locker or outside, away from the clear divide between the students within the two gangs.

Fangs no longer waited in the parking lot after school when it let out for the day because he had started to miss class to leave early. Most of the Serpents had; faculty wasn’t oblivious to their collective disappearance but still took no punitive action. Our mornings consisted of silence. He never looked up across the parking lot for me, instead seemed too preoccupied with Sweet Pea or Toni to see anything outside of the three of them. He had definitely settled into his place among them, and seemed quite happy and at home. I tried to be comforted by that.

I still walked by him in silence. 

The last text I sent to Fangs was dated 10/30/17. He hadn’t responded. He spent plenty of time with Sweet Pea at the Wyrm; I’d seen his bike parked out front in a circle with the others. The rare occasion we did bump into each other, it was awkward side-steps around one another and muttered apologies. Looking on the outside in, you would’ve never known we had been best friends four months prior. 

There had been a raid, and I watched Fangs and his friends walk out of the school doors, cuffed and shoved into the back of the cruisers. That was the second visit from the Sheriff in two weeks. If Fangs hadn’t told his mom about his affiliation with the Serpents yet, I was sure she knew about it now. 

I walked out of Pop’s, hot chocolate in hand as the snow littered the ground and my breath spun in swirls into the bitter air. I had just made it past the train tracks and was passing the mini-mart when I rounded the corner and saw his beefy frame leaning against the side of the building. 

Fangs glanced up, hands shoved into the pockets of his leather, mouth and brows pulled together. His exterior had hardened significantly over the last three months; Funny Man Fangs didn’t live here anymore. What was left was merely a shell of the person he used to be. His eyes had grown tired, and he sported heavy dark bags underneath of them. His muscle had packed in bulk, ensuring his shoulders reached their full potential to give him a full, thick frame. 

Stop that. 

“You don’t say hi anymore?” He asked loudly, surprising us both. It had been the first thing he had said to me in almost six weeks — with the exception of the run in at Mel’s. 

I laughed once, shaking my head in slight disappointment, “You used to be the boy who hated snakes,” I replied, turning to look at him over my shoulder, “Looks like that’s changed.” 

I wish he had said something, or stopped me. I wish he had gotten angry, or offended. I wish he had gotten vocal, gotten loud, given me anything that reminded him of what we were supposed to be. 

Instead, he let me walk away in silence.

read part two here

[pandoraxharlow]

I Am the One // self para

“Hey, Harlow, where the hell have you been?” Pandora quit trying to light the tip of the cigarette hanging between her lips to turn around, the sight of Jason making her stomach plummet harshly. Jason, ex-boyfriend, all around douchebag she popped her cherry to, Jason. The very same one who couldn’t seem to leave well enough alone. He started out as one of those high school friends Pan either got high or drunk with on the weekends before those weekends turned daily and the partying turned into more than just simply sharing the joint. Jason may have thought they were serious and, okay, she might have given him the impression, but the relationship fell apart once she realized how undedicated to commitment she was. Not to mention, how toxic he became. “What’s it to you, asshole?”

“Ouch. You didn’t answer my question.” Jason breathed a chuckle and shoved both hands in his pockets as he approached the blonde, eyeing her with immense appreciation. That was another thing about Jason Pan could not stand, he couldn’t seem to resist staring at her like she was a piece of meat. “The fuck you disappear to? Me and Beca both tried calling you.” It’s how he and Pandora met. Through his younger sister. “I mean, you’re not even in Newford anymore.”

“That’s none of your business, okay?” Pan gave up on her smokes and stuck the unlit stick in her bag, “Since that bullshit with Vincent, my parents were up my ass more than usual. If I had to deal with another fucking boring lecture, I swore to all that is holy I wasn’t sticking around.” Liar, dirty, dirty, liar, thought Pandora, you know the real reason you stayed away from the faction and it had nothing to do with the folks. She didn’t want to keep her and Benji between her and Benji. She wasn’t ashamed or embarrassed even if she didn’t know what they were. All she really knew is how she felt, how she felt about him. All Pandora really wanted was something she could call her own. 

“You were never good at poker face, sweetpea.” Jason’s mouth turned in a curious frown, masquerading what he already knew with a faux pondering. “Is this the part where you pretend you weren’t in greenpoint? Or are you going to straight up lie about spending all of your free time hanging with Davenport’s ex golden boy?” Shit, he knew. Pan hadn’t made it that obvious, honestly, she was careful to cover her tracks and practice discretion. Maybe she didn’t try hard enough. “You realize what kind of company he keeps now, right, the band of psychos we all know do terrible shit for the dough.”

Pan couldn’t place her trust denying the truth would work in her favor, but it hadn’t stopped her nonchalant shoulder shrug, “Who I’m seeing or giving my attention to no longer became your concern the very second we broke up, Jason. We all do terrible things and we’re all terrible people, sweetpea, so how about you worry less on whose bed I’m warming and more on keeping your pecker away from my general vicinity.”

“So, you’re not even going to pretend that science freak hogs your efforts at normal romance. Come on, Pandora, you were never slow and steady.” Jason inched closer, too close for the young woman’s comfort, but she couldn’t stop him as she felt the small of her back gently press into the side wall of a brick building. His voice had always been silky smooth, seductive, demanding enough to make her do as he pleased. Some called it wrapped around his finger, she now saw it for what it truly was. Control. “You were always hot and heavy. Always in the moment. Impulsive. You lost your fun, Pandora, but you’re not going to find it with Evans.”

Pan breathed a shaky sigh and ran a tongue along her lower lip cautiously. “You want my confession, fine, here it is. I’m seeing Benji. We watch movies, we cuddle, he talks all adorable and nerdy and I’ll listen or I talk and he listens. He doesn’t pressure me. He doesn’t use sex to pull me under, in fact, we’re taking it slow. And I like it.” She pressed her head against the brick, almost hoping she could sink into the wall and disappear from this conversation as she shoved him backwards. “And he especially doesn’t treat me like his toy.”

“Look who turned into their sister.” Pandora watched the disbelief mar Jason’s expression. She couldn’t predict correctly what was going through his head, but she could guess he was in complete denial that is the way he treated her. A toy he could sweet-talk and reel in anytime he so desired. “That’s not who you are, Panny. Does he know who you really are? The drugs? Every nasty fantasy I fulfilled in that little head of yours?” Jason reached out a hand, gliding his fingers along her cheek delicately, the action sending shivers down her spine, “He doesn’t fuck you like I can and we both know it.”

Pan reacted to the touch almost instantly, instinct coming before thought as she pulled back an arm and sent her fist flying straight into his nose. She heard something snap satisfyingly, a small groan, and if the appearance of blood is any indication, Jason’s response told the blonde she broke it. “What’d you think was going to happen? You’d remind me of the good old days, dangle the many times I faked every orgasm in front of my face, and I’d come crawling back on my hands and knees? You were a piece of shit before, J, and you’re still a piece of shit now. You never deserved me, you self-righteous fucker.”

Jason’s already short fuse came to a sizzle since the first Benji mention, yet, the temper halted to a head as he shot out a hand and wrapped his fingers around Pandora’s throat. He ignored the gasp and even ignored as her hands moved to clutch his wrist tightly, and, while Pan may have tried, she didn’t possess the strength to pry him away. “Remember who was there when Mommy and Daddy thought you were the invisible girl? Remember who cared about you more than your own sibling? Who gave you the jacket, Pan, hm? You can tie your hair in a ponytail, ditch the heavy makeup, and lose the leather, but that doesn’t hide the fact, babe.” Jason tightened his grip exponentially, “I made you, Pandora, don’t you ever forget that.” He pressed a harsh kiss to her lips and released his hold altogether before taking one step back.

Pandora sputtered a significant gulp of air, the oxygen soothing relief as it filled her scorching lungs the second he let go. A hand lifted to wipe her lips, a hope to scrub the kiss away quickly fading. This is why she left. This is the reason why she avoided Newford at all costs. It may have been her family or the growing complications with Rosie, but with that relationship on the possible mends, it was Jason she was running from. “Fuck you.” She spat the words venomously, “If you ever touch me again...”

You’ll what? Rat on me to Benji?” He might take the risk, though, it never slipped his mind the rumors surrounding the kid’s new place of residence. Assassins capable to make it look like an accident? No one cared for Benji enough to grant his little lady friend a favor. “Oh, no, wait, you’ve been hanging around Cabello princess a lot too. You could spill the beans to your new bestie Eleanor and she’d pay to make me disappear. That’s how it goes, right? Doubt you’d want blood on your hands.” He scoffed, “Better yet, I’ll let slip to Savitri what a whore you’ve become, Pan. What certain disgraced scientist you’ve spread your legs for this time. Especially his personal connection to the same asshat who attacked your very faction. Naughty girl.” The man tsked, “What a conspiracy.”

“Of course, you could stop all of this if you just came and stayed home.” Jason continued, “You don’t need him or Cabello, Pan. I’m the one who’s here, I’m the one who knows you, and you know deep down I’m the only person who has ever cared about you.”

“Go ahead, tell that bitch what everyone probably already knows with their two damn eyes.” Pan’s eyebrows lifted as her voice barely made it past her lips, “I don’t hide who I’m friends with in this city unlike the entirety of St. Cascadia. I’m an open book. Oh, no, wait,” Her croaking tone turned mocking, “I’ll tell them myself because you know what? Even a disgraced ex scientist who never deserved banishment and a fucking hot ass Cabello doesn’t evoke half the vomit-inducing embarrassment being seen in public with you does, Jason.” 

“You’ve always hid the doubt and self-loathing pretty good, Harlow, I’ll give you that. You know where you belong.” He hissed through gritted teeth, blanching at the iron metal taste of the blood dripping into his mouth, “You’ll never be his, gorgeous.”

“And I’ll never in a million years be yours.” Even the attempt to swallow sent her throat screaming, “Jason, just get out of here and leave me the fuck alone.” He looked absolutely grotesque standing there, nose bent in several places, the scarlet red streaks causing a horror movie effect that pinched her nerves in real life than it did with a television screen.

“We’ll see about that, Pandora.” Jason began taking the slow steps backward, pointing his index finger to his nose as he did so. She tried ignoring the charming twisted smile he plastered on which hardly seemed to match the crooked state of the shattered body part he called a nose. “Fat chance you’d ever kiss this and make it better, right? I’ll forgive you when you get back.”

Pandora watched Jason’s figure grow smaller and smaller as he walked away, feeling herself fully breath a sigh of relief for the first time since he showed up. She was better than this, she was far from falling for his manipulative charisma. What if he was right? The leather jacket Pan was infamous for came from Jason’s collection and she didn’t truly don the black until he came crashing into her life. She did act in rebellion, but he pushed it further. Pandora slowly lifted a hand to her neck gingerly, knowing very well the physical attack would leave bruises. It was a strange thought considering how Rosie would respond or Benji or, hell, even Eleanor if she ever truly cared, but the first person to pop in her head she needed to tell, to ask for help, was Derek.

This, all of this...wasn’t over.