#DESCRIBE YOURSELF ON ANON AND ILL SAY IF ID DATE YOU

[pineapplerightsideupcake]

hello im on anon bc im new to radblr and im a crypto but just wanted to say thank you for standing up for bisexuals on this blog. idk why but for some reason i expected radblr to have better opinions on bi women than the whole ‘sexually promiscuous bihet’ and ‘traitor for being osa’ and ‘more privileged than homosexuals’ bullshit that everybody else spews. the alphabet cult is actively erasing us in favor of ‘trans inclusive labels’, radblr is invalidating us by blatantly ignoring so many bi women’s experience with sexuality. the biphobia here is almost worse than any offhanded comment ive heard from a straight person. i also don’t think many understand that some women know they’re bi and are confident in that, but others may use bi during a time when theyre unsure if they’re actually attracted to men. ive gone a few of my teenage years acknowledging to myself that im bi, but now in my 20s im questioning if i ever truly felt attracted to men. the things i feel sexually in my most recent relationship with a woman are things ive never felt or even imagined were possible when ‘crushing’ on a guy. i acknowledge that *some* men are aesthetically pleasing for me to look at, but i’m also penis repulsed and always have been. theres nothing sexy to me about penis. truly. it makes me ill thinking about it. and that is confusing for me, bc seeing so many lesbians on here say how sure theyve been about liking women makes me think they did not grow up in an area like i did where homosexuality was truly thought of as demonic, even by the most ‘liberal’ people. i had no idea ssa was normal until i was probably 12 or 13 years old, and before then i just. repressed those feelings. i still did until i was about 17 and fully admitted to myself that ‘hey, i like girls’.

also i didn’t even know what the ‘comphet masterdoc’ was until exploring radblr, but i had heard comphet before and felt that it was very accurate in describing how i feel about men. idk anything abt what’s on the doc. regardless of my ‘true’ sexuality, it feels like theres a very hostile attitude towards bisexuality here, or even someone saying ‘ive tried to have a crush on guys before but only feel sexually/romantically attracted to women’ is met with ‘if youve even THOUGHT about having sex with a man then youre not a lesbian.’ no room for nuance.

sorry for the rant in your inbox, i hope this is okay. but yeah. thank you for being open about bisexuals here and standing up for them.

Thank you! I realized a while ago that radblr had a lot of issues that need to be challenged but I’ve also come to appreciate why these issues occur.

At the end of the day, almost nowhere allows women to speak this freely. Lesbians have had even their online communities absolutely destroyed by the TQ. So more than a few lesbian women on here really don’t want to talk to or about non lesbian women. And I think they’d be happier if they created a separate space for themselves on here where they didn’t feel pressured to, which I think is where a ton of this negativity comes from.

Bisexual women also need to stop offering themselves up as social sacrifices. I see a lot of the anti bi stuff come from bi women themselves sadly. A lot of women on radblr never unlearned that deeply unhelpful ID pol hierarchy from their TRA days.

As for your own personal journey, don’t let other people’s pain, no matter how legitimate, compound your own pain. The way I navigated my sexuality was I called myself a lesbian in my head because men did repulsed me. But it felt like a lie. I’d see a handsome dude jogging and feel a pang of attraction. Men still crept into my fantasies. I have zero desire to sleep with or date men. But that’s got nothing to do with my attraction to them. It’s a conscious personal choice I’ve made for my own happiness and safety.

So call yourself a lesbian just inside your head. Do it everyday. Look in the mirror and say “I am a lesbian” and if after a few months that feels like a lie then you’re bisexual and that’s amazing! If it feels like coming home, if everyday it feels more true, then you’re a lesbian and that’s amazing!

Please love yourself no matter what 💛

[pressedfloral]

female, 18, 5’2 with an attitude, brown hair with hazel eyes. i like taking pictures, music, studio ghibli films, ballet, nature, and bunnies. my ideal date would be going to a botanical garden and i’d take cute pictures of you! or we can go to an art museum💖

Wow you sound like such a cutie! Heck those date ideas are cute I love botanical gardens and art museums ! I’d totally date you!

[angebisoux]

hi im 16, with short curly red hair and brown eyes. I'm a lil over 5 ft. I'm a demigal that loves theater, drawing, cartoons, music, etc. Im either punk and a sassy lil ish or really just a big baby there is no in between. I would take you to a book store or maybe ice skating ooh man I fricken love ice skatingggg I dunno where im going with this here

ice ,, skating,,, ICE SKATING. AAAAAHH ILYILYILY 💙💙💙

[invejja]

nb girl, 14, brown eyes and brown hair, my main interests are drawing, anime, editing and rap music kfjdkdkd and my ideal date would be touring a city and then getting some ice cream or like a video game cafe or smth

yeah!! id date u!! u seem super cute!

[coolguycy]

i think the "describe yourself on anon and ill say if id date you!" thing is so funny when people submit fictional characters because i fall for it every time

like oh youre a tall guy with brown hair and youre favorite color is green? how cute! and then its fuckin luigi

[wholyfrick]

23! f! 5'7", blue eyes, half brunette half blonde but would like to be all blonde again really bad!! making things, anything! any music but really like the b52s! we could go to the museum or walk around a park n point out interesting things to each other!

your hair sounds really cool (im imagining it as a split dye) also sorry if i talk abt hair a lot i dye mine all the time so im always interested in what other people are doing to theirs. i havent heard of the b52s but ill add it to my queue. omg i love museums! the way to text is cute and id probably go out w u

Describe yourself on anon and I'll say if I'd date you!

[sakiye]

FOR THE "DESCRIBE YOURSELF AND ILL SAY IF ID DATE YOU" ANON : I love movies and series (absolutely adore the animation industry especially things like ATLA and She ra) and live to binge. I'm told that I'm funny but I don't really see it. I am tall and am told to be very cuddly. I have both big brain moments and zero(0) braincell moments, both tend to happen whenever I'm in need of the other. I can cook. I tend to gush alot about the things I love, which is mainly whichever show and characters I'm into at the moment. I love dogs and cats alike. I also have excellent hindsight (anxiety things) if that means anything, for example I realize I may have just written too much and that this is more rambling than anything, so imma quit while I'm ahead. ALSO I LOVE YOUR BLOG AND HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY WHENEVER YOU SEE THIS💕

AHHHHHHHH 

ANON ILY <3 <3 <3 <3

AND THANK YOUUU I HOPE U ARE HAVING A GREAT DAY TOO <3 <3 <3 <3

[meltedberrycake]

hey remember that post you reblogged that said "describe yourself on anon and ill say if id date you"? here's a hint: im already dating you :D hope you can figure it out or this is gonna be REALLY awkward

i would totally date u, nora because i am jsjsjs

[sweet-marie]

remember "describe yourself on anon and ill say if id date you"..... god that was nuts. and it was so funny when people were like sorry no

[unfortunatematchups]

(Hello is this blog dead because I haven't seen you post since February)

nope, this blog aint dead. i have it open on a browser tab as long as im online to check on any new asks and messages. im going to leave a short explanation here for those who dont want to waste their time.

weve been busy with other interests and ive gotten something like a writers block. matchup block? since im the primary writer here, theres pretty much no activity as long as im not writing. thats it. no reason, nothing to do with personal problems. just a block. 

keep reading for the real reason. you might not like it, but here it is.

im going to use these john sprites to convey my emotion so it might clear up any doubts on how im feeling. lets start with the process of how i write a match.

this is what a draft looks like. i write out how i would rant about this pairing, errors and all, then i leave it for the next day to come back to this and clean this draft into a polished, three-pointer paragraph. the thing is, im the only one doing this, so its obviously going to take long. i dont mind, i love to type and see something spawn from my effort. 

the problem? these rants are people-specific. right. whatever im rambling about in the draft, its about the ask and the ask only. it wouldnt fit if you crammed it into another ask, it wouldnt make a lick-a-sense if it was used to answer someone else. but, when i start to polish it up with clear and coherent sentences, suddenly it becomes… static. it becomes plain and simple, uninteresting and linear. think of it like youre hearing about a book from someone you know and trust versus a review. the person you know describes why the book is great with a lot of passion and love, but theres a lot of errors in delivery and some awkward bits they havent flushed out yet. 

nevertheless, its enjoying and persuasive, because you can see how they love it so much to the point where it gets them like that. they dont plan out how theyll describe the book to you word by word, because theres no need to. seeing how it gets them excited gets you excited, so you buy their faith in the book. 

what about a review? its clean, its cut, its perfect in delivery. it has a flow, introducing you to the story and overall appeal, then maybe it digs down for a spoiler or two. it gels with you in a simple fashion, doesnt quite have that connection a passionate ramble has. because its professional. 

thats what ive been making this blog to be. professional. i answer the request with a polished, pretty and perfect answer. theres no personal connection. i could take a match, swap out a couple of words, maybe cut out a bit, and it would be clear for another match. it feels static to write those paragraphs, and it progressively gets worse each time i repeat the process. im chipping away at something so close, so personal and unique into something dull and professional because i want it to look clean.

but thats my end of the problem. i dont like how it comes out, so what? people enjoy it. they must be, seeing how theres fifty three fucking asks for matchups and 73 followers. 

i wont show all the asks i have in the inbox, but ill tell you what majority, if not all of them, sound like. 

“I’m bi/pan”, “I have brown hair/eyes”, “I’m chubby/short”, “I like art/gaming/reading/writing”, “I’m shy around people I don’t know, I’m crazy around people I know”, “I’m a nerd”, “I have ADHD/Anxiety”. 

of course, there are some exceptions. not everything i say is as is, but from 50+ asks, these are what about three quarters of them sound like. there are personal differences, like music tastes and obscure hobbies, but the general gist is there. 

im not going to say anything about the sexuality orientation, because im in a friend group where majority, if not all, are not cishets. yes, people like art and gaming. 

but thats it? these descriptors are such shallow answers. i can personalise a match for you, sure, but does it feel like its right? you like gaming. so what, do you like ALL games? from FPS to Dating sims to Horror games to Sports games to Adult games? do you like ALL art? Surrealism, sculpture, comics, abstract, even those where they splash paint and call it a day? really? i dont think im asking for a lot when it comes to being specific. some asks literally just go ‘im a bi female, 5′3, i like gaming and drawing, im sometimes shy but i can be sassy at times’. 

with everyone being so similar and vague, how am i supposed to give a match i feel is right? i might as well take everyones favourite boy david elizabeth strider and talk about how he likes your art and how he likes gaming and oh isnt it so great that you two like music. 

there are some unique ones, and its pretty obvious which ones they are because ive put in more love into them. and i havent been able to do that to many asks. 

and the physical descriptions. while im sure some of the characters do have types and preferences, i dont care for appearances. i dont care if youre fat or skinny, i dont care if youre tall or short, brown hair or blonde. you being morbidly obese or morbidly skinny may affect the match depending on how i feel the characters might respond to someone with those physical traits, but they shouldnt matter. 

i dont need how you look. i dont want how you look. its shallow and unimportant. it takes up space in the ask, because you could be using it to describe your personality or interests in detail. not that youre limit to one ask, you can send in an entire fucking fourteen page essay and id match you, as long as youre telling me something i can pair you with. 

telling me youre ‘chubby’ or ‘blonde’ doesnt help visualise shit. this shouldnt be new information to you or anyone else. writing shit like ‘he loves your curves!’ or ‘she likes how short you are because it makes you cute’ is bullshit and is simply self-serving nonsense. yes, its an additional bonus if your lover likes how youre short or fat, but that shouldnt be why theyre in love with you. a paragraph based on how much they like to hold you are appreciate your body is utter fucking nonsense. you appreciate your own body, and thats it. 

i dont feel inspired when i look at some of these asks. i dont feel like i should answer any of these because a) im not obligated to, this blog is just a side hobby and b) id be writing something i dont enjoy for people who might also not enjoy it. i dont deserve to sit at my laptop and write something i feel doesnt represent my work or ideas well, and the person who im matching doesnt deserve the half-assed boring paragraph of nonsense im pulling out of my ass just to clear the inbox. 

ive taken some time away from this blog and upon receiving this ask, i wanted to use the same old excuse every other blog uses: ‘we’ve been busy, so we went on an unannounced hiatus’. 

but thats not true. with the pandemic forcing lockdowns, theres essentially nothing else for us to do. if anything, this would mean that we have more time to write. 

so there it is. my truthful answer as to why nothings coming out of this blog.

part of this is my fault. i thought that maybe i could force myself to match all those vague asks that feel like theyre about the same person, just with a couple of changes. but i cant. i wont. im not going to keep writing shit i dont like, and im not going to keep giving half-assed matches, giving characters people are at the very least sure to be okay with. 

i want to write exciting, unique and adorable relationships. i thought that with the homestuck fandom being so vast and creative, maybe i would get the chance to meet and write for a couple of people who were just so different it would make pairings id never thought of. 

but nah, it looks like everything is the same. all the anon asks start to bleed together. the responses start becoming the same. im given descriptions that sound so tame, so generalised. like somehow, youre afraid of letting me know who you are as a person. or not, perhaps you just struggle with expressing yourself. thats why youre using anon to send in your ask, isnt it? 

i turned anon on because i wanted to respect privacy. i wanted people to be able to send in each and every detail about themselves while remaining behind a mask so they could get the best match without exposing every inch of themselves on a blog. maybe that was my mistake. 

ill leave the matches open, but im only going to do the ones that interest me. but if you decide that you dont give a fuck about the quality of the match, tell me or something. i have drafts that i can just post. maybe youd like that. 

-pretty obviously, mod olio.

[pressedfloral]

hi isla! i'm female, 17, an infp and 1,55 (very little ^·^) i have brown eyes and brown hair. i love reading, writing -especially poetry-, watching old movies and walks. i would take cute photos of you and write about you 7/24. my dream date would be visiting a museum then walking down the streets of the city and a picnic on the beach maybe? love you!!!

Hi anon! Oh my goodness you sound absolutely lovely and those date ideas are super heckin adorable! I’d 100% date you!

[angebisoux]

Hi hello liana I am 17, pan??? idk but I’m sure into girls, I’m nonbinary and 5’8. I’ve got light blue eyes (which don’t fucking work so I’ve got glasses), I’m v pale and I’ve got mid length bright purple hair. Interest include reading, journaling, yoga, volunteering and learning languages. An ideal date would be a science or history museum, a cat cafe with tea and a walk around a park or somewhere before just getting to be all cosy with blankets, movies and hugs -🤸🏼‍♀️

OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU HAD ME AT CATS WITH THE DATE THING. ALSO. YOU SEEM SO CUTE 💜💜

[gaskarth-omg]

yeah i know that u r a person too. so we can make love like normal people?

no, it’s not all about sex. i could care less about that as long as i have someone who loves who i am as a person. i care more about if they value and respect me as a human being.

DESCRIBE YOURSELF ON ANON AND ILL SAY IF ID DATE YOU

[missjanjie]

hi hi hi I’m 5ft 3 but I wear heels literally all the time because I have a deep need to be taller and if I wear flats I might cry I’m 19 and I love pink and pastel colours so I basically dress like a 5 year old but cuter and more weeby I had a hardcore emo phase for a few years and at this point I’m overcompensating and making everything in my life as pretty and pink as I can to make up for the Lost YearsTM where I only wore black and was sad all the time- I love drag race and comic books (1/2)

very relatable and adorable u sound v v cute, would date ✨

describe yourself on anon and ill say if id date you

[a-genderfluid-bitch]

"DESCRIBE YOURSELF ON ANON AND ILL SAY IF ID DATE YOU" I'm a 5"8, 16 y/o girl with brown hair and hazel eyes. interests: reading books, i like fantasy and historical fiction, i like to draw. Ideal date: we just go around town and do fun things(such as an arcade or swim or a go to a park, literally anything) we'd eat at a diner, then we'd get some ice cream cones and make our way to a house where we'd cuddle under some soft blankets and watch t.v. I'd like to laugh w/ people. -💜

YES I would date you. Going to a park would be so fun and cute (even though it’s impossible right now because of social distancing). I love cuddling and watching TV! Historical fiction is awesome but I haven’t found any books in that genre that I’m interested in at the moment (but I do love the genre, I just haven’t found a good book in a while). Ice cream is amazing and I would fall in love with anyone who offered to get ice cream with tbh. In conclusion: YES, I would date you.

[official-lucifers-child]

is the describe yourself on anon and ill say if id date you or not thing still going or is it dead

still going!! have fun!!