#Crowley is not really very sneaky

[acheemient]

If part 3 of 1941 is not "A Nightingale Sang In Berkeley Square" coming on the radio and Crowley standing from the table where they have been drinking wine and coming around to Aziraphale's side and offering his hand to Aziraphale to dance, and Aziraphale looking a bit wonderstruck and a bit delighted and taking Crowley's hand, and they slow dance, holding each other so close, and they look into each other's eyes, and Crowley whispers, "Angel," and he's looking at Aziraphale's lips with all the wanting in the universe written upon his eyes, and Aziraphale with a face that says he's never wanted anything more than to swallow Crowley whole so he can Keep him, and they lean in, and at the very last second, Aziraphale stops them and they are standing there breathing heavily with their foreheads pressed together, and Aziraphale whispers, "I want to; oh God, I want to," and Crowley whines and tries again, but Aziraphale pulls back but doesn't leave Crowley's arms, and says, "We can't," and Crowley looks like he's been slapped, and Aziraphale looks so heartbroken and says, "They almost caught us tonight, and they would have destroyed you" and then continues so quietly, like it's a secret, "I don't know what I would do if I lost you," and Crowley tries to protest saying they can be sneaky, they won't get caught, they can have this, together, and Aziraphale looks so sad and says, "Oh Crowley," and Crowley knows Aziraphale is so close to agreeing and so close to pulling away, and he whispers, "Please," and for a second Aziraphale looks like he is going to give in, but he can't put Crowley in danger, so he makes his face colder, and he steps out of Crowley's arms, even though it nearly kills him to do so, and he says, "Besides, you know Angels don't dance," and Crowley remembers himself says, "No I don't suppose they do," and he straightens up and puts his glasses on and pretends nothing happened and says, "Of course you're right," and they nod at each other and Crowley moves to leave the bookshop, and Aziraphale feels like he's about to lose something so precious that he will not be able to ever get back, so he calls "Crowley," and Crowley turns to look at him, and Aziraphale says, "Perhaps someday...," but he can't say what he really means (some day we can have that, someday we can be together how we want, someday I will stop pulling away), so he visually changes his mind and finishes with, "we can dine at the Ritz," and he prays to a God that he, in this moment, hates so, so much for keeping him from the demon he loves more than anything, that Crowley understands his true meaning, and Crowley looks like maybe he does and like maybe he still has hope, and he nods and says, "Stay safe, Angel," and Aziraphale nods back, and then Crowley leaves, and Aziraphale is left looking absolutely devastated and heartbroken and angry, truly angry, for the first time in his long and lonely existence that he has to be loyal to Her rather than to him, and he takes a moment, takes a breath, and walks silently over to the radio and turns up the volume on the song and closes his eyes and gives himself that moment to remember what it felt like to be held, to be loved, to imagine what saying yes would bring, then honestly what is even the point of all of this?

[noneorother]

The secret timeline inside of Good Omens season 2 revealed, *part2*

Part 1 l Part 2

The ineffable cut is explained in part 1. Please read that first. (I’ve burnt a timecode into this ineffable edit to help pick up the rhythm.)

So now that I've shown you XX:X6 is the number of the beast in the last installment, what else can we glean? Well, it turns out angel numbers (sequences of repeated numbers ex: 22:22 or 20:02) are quite important events in the S2 universe! I've cut together every "Angel Number" I could find in the timeline and put them in order. I first noticed this near the end of the ineffable cut, where Beelzebub and Gabriel hold hands, so I've started with that one just to give you an idea how bonkers this whole sequence is. Don't forget, sound on! Breakdown below the cut.

So we start off with this Beez and Gabriel sequence near the end of the cut. They start singing to each other a little out of time, but lo and behold, at 02:03:20 the music comes in right on time with the seconds ticking by to line them up. By the time they reach 03:33 they're gone.

Aziraphale is excited to get his "record"! He's doing something sneaky, and as a result opens the door to go off to said covert activity on 00:02:22.

Crowley asks "Do they know?" on 03:33. Who are they and why does he want to know? This whole scene is on a St-James park bench so spying and double speak is in progress, clearly.

Crowley then asks "Something big?" on 00:04:44. We get the hint for the main action of the entire second season here. Something's up with the up...

Now the real fun begins! I'll come back to the ones I just skipped in a later post because they're more subtle. Here's the first "real" angel number at 11:11. Aziraphale discovers THE box and touches it for the first time.

At 22:22 Nina and Maggie's signs are "mysteriously" ignored by a human passerby.

This is wild. Aziraphale is learning about the Everyday record and something funny happens. 33:31 Aziraphale says, " Do you have a copy?" 33:32 Maggie says, "Mm, too many of them" and at the same time a car horn beeps twice. 33:33 Aziraphale is startled by the fact that a double car horn happened on a XX:X2 and looks out the window in concern. So the question is: does Aziraphale feel or know the rhythm of the timestamps?? And are things that line up with numbers a signal he's paying attention to?

A funny one! At 44:44 Aziraphale seems to be wanting to check if Gabriel is really who he says he is, and is watching him like a hawk. Gabriel does all he can to do nothing at all and look innocent while the angel number passes by.

Another funny one. Nice. 55:55 reveals that the Bentley likes Aziraphale more than Crowley, and does whatever he wants, including not speeding when he puts his foot down.

This next one's a little peculiar. It seems like an exchange about Gabriel's whereabouts, but it's the halfway point of the edit (1:11:10-11:11:11) of the ineffable timeline and we seem to be having two conversations at once. Shax says on 11:11 "He hates you." Does she mean that she thinks Crowley hates Aziraphale, or... that Gabriel hates Aziraphale. Aziraphale looks noticeably shocked at her reply. After the eyebrow raise of "You don't seem like his type at all" I would bet we're not talking about Crowley anymore. How did she get this information?

01:22:22 Gabriel does a little laugh to himself while signalling with the lamp. What the fuck? Does someone know morse code?

01:33:33 Maggie extends her had to Nina at the ball, to invite her to dance. Nina looks pleased, but doesn't move until... a very odd miracle sound on a XX:X6 happens and she jumps up to take Maggie's hand. That miracle sound is not Aziraphale's, and besides, he would never miracle on a 6. Who's the demon making Nina dance...

Aziraphale's halo toss is the flip from ACT II to ACT III of season 2, and as such, get's a special time right before rolling over to the second hour. He decides to throw it down on exactly 01:54:45, and at 01:54:54 gets a giant tubular bell ring in the music to highlight the action. It lands on the ground at 01:55:01, and incinerates the demons at precisely 01:55:10.

01:59:59 Beez and Gabriel hold hands, and a magical chime sounds at 2:00:00. Maggie start her sentence "Aww, that's really sweet" at the same time, and manages to finish it on 2:00:02. (Dagon politely waits to pretend to barf on a XX:X3 after she's done.)

The last one is a big one : 02:02:02 gets "to face CELESTIAL punishment" by Michael. This is what we've been waiting for the entire season, the Checkov's gun of the book of life. But, where is it? We then get an odd cowboy showdown style stare-off between Michael and Shax. I'm predicting that missing chunk of time in the bookshop before we come back to Michael threatening Aziraphale with the book of life is going to be a pretty interesting reveal in season 3. -------------------------------------------

People, this is the short version of this post. There are SO MANY things to unpack. Next up is doubled numbers. If you want an ides of what it takes to break things down, here's my workflow timeline right now. The stuff after the first big space is numbers I haven't shown you yet... This show is insane.

[badaziraphaletakes]

Submitting this... it's a long one, sorry 🥲

*Shakes out very, very long scroll*

*In Bildad voice* "Shall I summarize?"

✅ Demanding that an ab*se victim have a plan for how to fix their ab*ser's Evil Scheme

✅ Saying you would handle the situation better than they did

✅ Acting like outsmarting an ab*ser would have been as simple as writing a sneaky lil note on a sneaky lil piece of paper, like I'm sorry but holy sh*t y'all that is just the most patronizing, trauma-invalidating BS I've ever heard

✅ Saying "idiotic"

✅ Using it to describe an Autistic-presenting character

✅ Who is also an ab*se victim

✅ Calling an ab*se victim "egocentric"

✅ Which is even more problematic given that that ab*se victim is also feminine

✅ Assuming Aziraphale actually wanted Crowley to come back with him, when we aren't yet in full possession of the facts

✅ Assuming Aziraphale meant literally anything he said in the entire Final Fifteen

✅ Assuming that, if Aziraphale really did actually want Crowley to come back with him, he didn't have a valid reason for it (maybe he actually thought it was the safest possible option for Crowley! We don't know!)

✅ Obliquely blaming Aziraphale for maybe being scared to go back alone? Or just not wanting to be lonely when he knows he might very well die up there?

✅ In short, eviscerating an ab*se survivor for having the audacity to respond to the horrendous situation their viewer has trapped them in, in anything short of an entirely morally irreproachable manner, and acting like their (supposed) moral failings gives us license to pronounce judgment on their situation

✅ Accusing Aziraphale of thinking he's always right and Crowley is always wrong, when we know Aziraphale says all that stuff like "You, I am sorry to say, are evil" in the knowledge that heaven and hell might be listening in at any moment

✅ Calling the things Aziraphale said under the ever-watchful eye of his ab*sers "starting a fight"

✅ Ignoring that, if Aziraphale is to blame for "starting a fight" , then just maybe Crowley might share some of the blame. (For the record, we don't think either of them are to blame here, considering Metatrash deliberately trapped both of them in a pressure cooker and turned up the flame, while simultaneously trying to manipulate each of them into thinking the situation was their husband's fault. A strategy which, incidentally, to have worked on a good portion of the fandom... << But we digress. :p )

✅ Saying Aziraphale "meant" the things he said while those ab*sers were possibly listening to him, and had literally just made an extremely explicit death threat

✅ Implying Crowley "doesn't have any spirit left"

✅ Accusing Aziraphale, rather than his and Crowley's ab*sers, of bearing the real responsibility for Crowley's distress

✅ Ignoring that Aziraphale was every bit as distraught as Crowley

✅ Saying Aziraphale "refuses to listen" because he cut Crowley off, even though he was stressed at the time and that's something all of us, especially the neurodivergent folk, do when we're stressed (AND even though he also probably stopped Crowley from saying something that would might have gotten them both roasted on a spit in the flaming cesspits of Abbadon)

✅ Saying that an ab*se victim has been "ignoring" their problem and needs to

✅ "confront"

✅ the "consequences" of

✅ "their" actions

✅ Acting like Aziraphale hasn't already (like any other ab*se victim/survivor) suffered more than enough for a million lifetimes

Did I miss anything lol?

(And okay, yes, the OP is responding to the "Aziraphale has a perfect plan to fix everything" take, which is an arguably slightly-problematic take in itself - but honestly, given that they responded to it by piling on a bunch of crap that was a thousand times more problematic, I'm not feeling disposed to make allowances.)

[blues824]

Can we get the TWST dormleaders with an S/O that is a FBI agent for the BAU? I enjoyed reading the one with the Obey Me brothers!

My search history looks like I’m committing every single crime to every single degree. But, this fic is a victory for Yuu/YN/Mc, and you’ll see why.

Riddle Rosehearts

He is definitely intrigued, since you don’t seem phased by your chosen profession. You’ve been faced with actual serial killers to try and find the motive as to why they did what they did, and you don’t seem to be affected mentally or emotionally.

What freaked him out was during a small date between the two of you in the labyrinth. You both were taking a small break for tea, when you told him that one of the leading reasons for homicide was because the perpetrator had suffered through too much abuse. 

That’s when he realized that he might want to consider therapy, since he is one step away from actually killing someone. After living with his mother for the 17 years of his life, he doesn’t want to risk hurting you because of a psychotic break.

Leona Kingscholar

He didn’t care at first, until you started digging into the issues within everyone. You told him that jealousy was one of the leading motives for murder, and you tried to make a light-hearted joke about him being one step away from just offing his brother.

Well now he’s really looking at and assessing himself to see if he needs to go to counseling because you were right: he was one step and a psychotic break away from just killing the monarch of the Sunset Savannah because he was tired of being seen as #2.

You give him an overall summary that everyone at NRC already has a motive for committing a serial crime, so now he’s definitely concerned. Mans will stray as far away from anyone (*cough cough* Malleus *cough cough*) since they’re all ticking time bombs.

Azul Ashengrotto

For someone in your profession, you seem calm. It does make sense, however, since if the person you’re assessing can get under your skin then that wouldn’t be any good. You still terrify him though, since you fly through NRC with ease.

You were unsettling and intimidating to him, even though you were very polite and courteous. It was during a Housewarden meeting where you brought it up to Crowley that he might want to consider investing in a school counselor. Azul was genuinely frightened when you explained that everyone was a pin’s drop away from killing a peer, and the Headmage couldn’t argue against you since you were a professional.

Well, the campus has been more stress-free because they now have the option to talk with a different professional rather than dumping all of their issues on you. Even the sneaky cecaelia himself went to counseling and felt a large burden being lifted off of his shoulders. 

Kalim Al-Asim

He honestly didn’t know what a BAU agent was until you told him that you basically found the reason why someone committed a federal/serial crime. Then he was very worried about how you survived for this long.

This man would one day ask if you could read his psyche, and he was pleasantly surprised. He was one of the most mentally stable people on campus, but then you told him that Jamil was one step away from going batshit.

Your efforts in trying to establish a system of mental and emotional support paid off, and Kalim took part in funding it. You both made a huge difference and now there is a school counselor at Night Raven College. 

Vil Schoenheit

He’s only heard of the occupation through films, so as he does your makeup he will ask you more questions about it since movies don’t always get it right. This man’s eyes went wide when you told him how you had to sit with federal criminals and try and evaluate them to determine their motives.

So, what you were saying is that you constantly put yourself in danger by sitting with criminals who could attack you at any point? Oh, no. This wouldn’t do at all. All he can say is that he’s glad you’re here and not risking yourself for your job (don’t let him hear about the field operations of the FBI).

Then, you made the mistake of telling him that since he’s constantly jealous of Neige, he’s only a few steps away from just ending either himself or the Snow White look-alike. He’ll be right back, he’s booking a therapy session right now.

Idia Shroud

He’s also only heard of your job through movies, so when he gets more comfortable around you he is asking questions left and right. Instead of being appalled, he’s intrigued as to the most common motives that you’ve seen.

Mans could listen to you until his ears bleed. Idia comes from a family that studies blot, which is accumulated through strong emotions. So, aside from the obvious, the jobs you two had were more similar than one would think.

This man also supported you in getting Crowley to establish a system of support for the students, but he didn’t help financially. He helped by making a threat to the old crow and told him that if he didn’t, he would use his family’s influence to link the bird not hiring a school counselor to the overblots.

Malleus Draconia

He didn’t know anything about your job until you brought it up during one of your nightly walks. He tried to keep calm as you told him that you were constantly put up against federal criminals to try and find the motive behind their crimes, but it was taking all of his willpower.

The Prince found it interesting, sure, but it shouldn’t be at the expense of your mental or even physical health. He was angry that your employers would put all of this responsibility on you, but you assured that the more dangerous people were put in a straight jacket. That totally made him feel better.

You teach him about the power that emotional support can have, and he helps establish a system at NRC. Since he is one of the five most powerful mages, Crowley couldn’t exactly refuse. He can see the difference that you made, and he congratulates you by giving you a rose on one of your walks.

[honey-milk-depresso]

Could you do a deltarune Kris!MC with the dormleaders and staff?

I decided to this with the staff since I wanted to give them more content :')) Also MC is a student, and this is platonic. I could only do 3 because I don't have the strength- at all-

You're rather… quiet, a bit too introverted that people would find it astonishing to be able to converse with you in anything. You aren't very energetic, and you tend to distant yourself from people, even the few friends that you have. Even so, you do seem to have a wide array of things you're interested in, love to pull pranks and interest in magic, perhaps why you were so fascinated in Twisted Wonderland.

TWST The Enigmatic, Introverted by somehow funny, MC (Kris)

Dire Crowley

A bit concerned for you to say the least. You're just awfully quiet, and you barely utter a single word to almost anyone! You okay?

Beside you, he looks like an overly enthusiastic father with their super quiet child. It's a rather funny dynamic to see, and Crowley helping you (well, trying-) to make friends with the other students was a rather challenging part of his whole career-

Somehow, though, you always manage to surprise him with your pranks such as how you replaced his writing ink with soy sauce, and he wondered why his ink smelt so salty.

Perhaps you really are a troublemaker deep down. He sighs, placing his top hat on his work desk as he took the bottle of ink from you.

"Hehehe..!" His eyes widened, twisting his neck to you with a shocked look on his face. You… you really just… laughed… OH MY SEVENS-

He's ecstatic, and he's smooshing his cheeks against yours. "AHHH MC, You laughed! I'm so delighted!" <3

Divus Crewel

Well, at least you're quiet and paying attention, he first thought. At first. After some time, he realizes just how awfully… quiet you are. Gosh, how you made him want you to talk.

Divus pulls you aside one day after class as you stared at him blankly yet expectantly. "Well, pup, you know you don't really bark or woof in this class. Or anywhere for that matter. Is there something the matter?"

You shook your head, only having him feel skeptical. Regardless, he keeps close tabs on you, and tries to partner you with new students during projects instead of the few same people (much to A*e and Deuce's dismay-), just so you can mix around and interact with more people, and it sort of worked (although some people made fun of you for being a weirdo… which Divus promptly took care of them).

Divus is a bit annoyed by you pulling off (harmless) pranks on him… but seeing you giggle quietly to yourself…

Ah, he'll let this one slide, pup. <3

Sam

Aren't you a quiet fella? You barely talk when you and your friends come over to his shop. You simply point to them what you want, and they do the ordering.

Even if they didn't come, you don't utter a single word to him at all.

He wonders if you don't talk at all, if you are mute, but it turns out that you actually can talk and speak (according to Adeuce), but you just choose not to.

Sam wouldn't force you to speak, but he'll mostly encourage you to. "Hey, wanna help me promote sales? I'll pay ya, promise!" Once he gets you to do the job, he'll start to pull the strings just the way he wants it.

"You gotta use your voice and spread the good deals, MC! Otherwise, no one's coming into the shop!" and hopefully you'll be more open to speak. Sneaky from Sam, but very smart of him to think of such.

Pranking Sam with a water balloon when he enters the door, the water splashing on top of his head makes him blink in surprise. He sees you laughing at the side, as he finally gets to hear you. He smiles and laughs with you. <3

Reblogs help! ^^

[bagofburntcreampuffs]

ʀʜʏᴛʜᴍ ɪɴ ᴏᴜʀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛꜱ

In a Crowd

« previous · masterpost · new accounts! »

➼ now playing...kaleidoscope

warning: Switching POV

(Jamil’s POV)

Jamil has been dealing with a dilemma. You.

For the longest time (since freshmen year), Jamil has been avoiding the devastating money-grabbing trio. Only for him to fall into the hands of their favorite little junior, you. You weren’t like your older counterparts, they were terrifying and sneaky. Unlike, you, who was always honest and genuine. Traits that are hard to come by in NRC, but even then sometimes he feels like he needs to be on guard. You were too powerful, luring him so easily, like a siren.

And a siren you were, when you sang during practice it was enchanting. Your voice lured him in that he felt as if he was drowning. 

It was 10:50 when Jamil sent you that text, his whole face was flushed with embarrassment. Fiddling with his hood he was questioning himself, was that too straightforward? He’s never personally texted you, but it shouldn’t be odd considering you two constantly talk. He doesn’t understand what has gotten into him recently. He can’t seem to keep his mind off you, continually looking for you in a crowd of people. Willing to always start a conversation. What was wrong with him?

He made a promise to himself, to keep away from any Octavinelle students. He’s pathetic, he made the sound realization that he was pitiful. But in the end, he guesses it’s alright, you weren’t bad. You weren’t bad at all.

The clock struck 11 and he watched Crowley walk onto the stage, microphone in hand. 

“Our last and final performance! Our school’s very own music club!” The crowd cheers immediately once Crowley heads back and the curtains draw open.

The stage was dark, Jamil heard Kalim go off on the drums and everyone soon followed in. Just like how they practice. Jamil had memorized the setlist, remembered the lyrics, and watched your movements. Except this time you were on stage, with a blue light shining down on you, and your voice echoing loudly to his seat. For someone who looked so nervous, you were really in your element. 

There was something about blue that looked beautiful on you, he could only imagine what you looked like in your merform. A thought bubbled in his mind of a new dream where he could be by your side in the deep sea.

His seat was in the middle, but a little further behind your friend group. He can see you perfectly in all your glory even with the distance. So, when a bright smile appeared on your face looking in his direction, he couldn’t help but think if you could see him too. Maybe you were looking at someone else, after all, he was somewhere in the middle of the crowd. You probably didn’t see him at all, but he smiles back anyway. Just on the slight chance you did mean it for him.

(Your POV)

You always hated your enhanced abilities when you first joined NRC. The noises were overwhelming and the smells were all so different. Floyd complained all the time when he was home during spring break last year. When you first appeared during orientation, you felt empathetic for Floyd immediately. The smells were nauseating and it felt like you couldn’t breathe, even with the potions Azul supplied you. 

Walking with your new legs was a struggle, but Azul was there to help you to make sure it wasn’t such a pain. Even so, you still find yourself tripping over your legs. The real reason why Azul never lets you work at the lounge. You were just too clumsy.

But at this moment you’ve never felt more grateful for your enhanced vision. Sure, you had to drink potions to muffle out the noise because of your sensitive hearing. Yet, it’s worth it.

Within the flashing lights, you can see Floyd, Jade, and Azul right below you. They’re so close to the stage and Floyd’s glowsticks are frantically waving through the air hoping you notice him. You quickly wave toward him as you walk to the front of the stage, there’s a shrill scream that immediately happens right after (It’s Floyd). 

Continuing to search in the crowd you manage to spot your silly group towards the middle of the audience. Deuce and Ace bump into each other to get a good look at the stage, Yuuken carrying Grim on his shoulder, Epel with his glowsticks, and Jack standing all tough (you swear you can see his tail wagging). 

Then as you continued to walk across the stage, microphone in hand, you were able to catch Jamil’s eye. Your smile widened and there you were met with Jamil’s small smile back. Ever since coming to NRC, you have one thing to be grateful for your enhanced abilities. Being able to see him smile, even with the distance.

Taglist: @ars-tral @bookworm666 @cecil-garlicbread @mysme-stuff @doughnuts-eater @kirexa @s7-evermore @jub1l1fe-c1ty  @frootloopscos

a/n: I'm so happy to finally finish the first part of this series, even though it took me a while. But I will be going on hiatus due to all of my upcoming exams! I'll be back near the end of May with the next part of this series! The taglist is still open if you wish to be added to it!

[fellthemarvelous]

I really want to see Crowley take up the position of Duke of Hell primarily because it would be his chance to finally have a James Bond moment of his own.

Crowley isn't evil and he isn't cruel. What he is, though, is clever and sneaky and very, very smart. If he refuses to act like the other Dukes of Hell, there will be questions.

He's averted an apocalypse once, with the help an angel. An angel who is now Supreme Archangel. Crowley could use Aziraphale's position as Supreme Archangel as leverage to get himself into a high position in Hell. He knows more about Aziraphale than anyone else, and it would be a great opportunity to act as a double agent without the rest of Hell entirely realizing what he's doing. No one is as creative as Crowley is, and that has been made obvious.

I can see Crowley and Aziraphale causing unrest in their head offices by going against the grain.

I don't think anyone envisioning a Duke of Hell Crowley is picturing him doing anything evil. He will simply get to do what he does best by fooling everyone around him. He and Aziraphale will act as though they are on opposite sides, but in the end, they will reveal that everything they have done has been a part of their own plan all along.

Or, if anything, they will prove that their end goals are the same when they choose to stand with humanity. They're once again preparing for a magic trick that could be fatal for one or both of them. They will force the angels and demons to question who they truly stand with.

Regardless of whether or not it actually happens, I think it would be fun to watch Crowley and Aziraphale ultimately prove that they can accomplish anything when they work together, but they need to get more angels and demons on their side to prove that there is more to live for than war and destruction.

[aziraphalesdiaries]

31 st. January 2024

Dear diary.

It has been a while now, since I departed to Heaven.

Since I left earth.

Since I left my bookshop.

Since I... left Crowley.

Crowley... He was so angry, when I offered him to come with me to Heaven. To be an angel again. To be my second in command. I was confused first, wondering, what was wrong with him. Why wasn't he happy? But I was confused by the entire situation. His words.. they didn't make any sense.

He ... confessed that we'd been a team for at least 6000 years, denying that we are. Then, he brought up the idea of running away again. But this time, he seemed so... desperate. He seid, that we 'could have been...us'.

Before I could get any of my thoughts together, he stepped towards me, grabbed me by the coat and ... kissed me.

Good heavens, I can't describe the feeling, can't describe what happened to me.

All these years of disguise, of performing a charade ... a charade of not liking that nasty, courageous and caring, brave, sneaky, charming, dashing, daring bastard... all this collapsed over me like a gigantic house of cards.

I didn't even have the chance to sort out the pieces, when he suddenly pulled away. His eyes, these wonderful yellow eyes, glared at me, awaiting what I had to say. And me? I stuttered, stumbled over my tongue and could onlz think of the sentence, I always said after we had a fight. The sentence that always made everything well again.

'I forgive you!'

Not this time.

I could see his eyes shadow, something broke within them.

'Don't bother!'

He went pale, turned on a heel and stormed out of the bookshop.

I stood there like back in Jericho again, when the walls came tumbling down. Or those poor humans of Sodom who were turned into pillars of salt.

My trembling hand touched my mouth... where his sweet lips had been moments ago. It already felt like eternity.

Before I could calm my thoughts and blink away my tears, The Metatron entered and urged me to leave.

It must have been a reflex. An escape reflex.

The next thing I remembered, was crossing the street at The Metatron's side, stepping towards the lift. Where he told me, what the ineffable plan really was.

The Second Coming.

All colour drained from my face. They're trying it again. And this time, it was, as Crowley had said 'The Big Thing'.

I was wrong.

He was right.

He'd been right all along.

I turned to my bookshop, where Muriel was about to close the door. But my eyes were on Crowley. My dear Crowley, as he stood next to the Bentley, waiting for me to turn away and run to him.

I could feel my heart breaking.

Because I didn't.

I had been tricked.

But if I wanted to save Humankind, if I wanted to save Crowley, my dear beloved Crowley, I had to go to Heaven. I had to be in charge and make a difference. It was the only way.

Heaven would never change.

So it had to be stopped from the inside.

I need some time to get used to my new title. Supreme Archangel Aziraphale is way too complicated, but Heaven insisted on that. So I go along with it as long as I can.

The first days and weeks were just a blurr, since there were so many things to be done. Michael and Uriel hadn't been very helpful. The Metatron kept a very close eye on me, but since I hadn't brought Crowley, his suspicion faded day by day.

I tried to feel at home, at least a bit, but every day without earth, the streets of London, Nina and Maggie and food and coffee and my 4 o' clock tea and - all over that- Crowley, was just bitter and empty. It drained all laughter from my face, made it a cold and stony mask.

I start to understand Gabriel, why he was, like he was. I even feel pity for him.

So I spend my days existing, listening to the orders given from above and give them to others

But today I miracled a small book, a pen and I allowed myself some time to process all those things that happened.

I have to be very cautious, listing all that happens up here in Heaven so that dear Crowley will know properly to make the right preparations.

Because I won't let them down.

Not after I gave away my flaming sword .

I won't let him down. Not again.

Sincerely yours

A. Z. Fell

[sonkitty]

The Sideburns Scheme Post #78

(For reference: The Sideburns Scheme)

Crowley, Good Omens 2, Episode 5, The Ball, rules

...

Sideburns Check

The sideburns are still longer but not quite longest-length. That's consistent with what they've been since Crowley exited the room of his last scene with Gabriel.

...

Brighter Red Streak Check

Because it is so, so dark in this scene, Crowley's red hair looks more like brown. It is very, very difficult to find the streak and questionable that I did. I am not showing these images with massive saturation increases, but I have indicated where they are for when I did check them with massive saturation increases. It is brightened at least. If you really want to to test it yourself, you can take the versions further up and use your own preferred method.

...

Hairstyle Changes

With it being so dark, the main thing I can notice is that the hair above Crowley's right eye has indented further and curls upward.

The saturation of red in his hair has lowered with the darkness.

...

Earthly Objects

(For reference: Earthly Objects)

These are guesses as usual.

Maggie is using keys, then confirmed to eventually be holding them when she puts them in her bag would be point #1.

Maggie is touching the bag by zipping it to put the keys away as point #2.

The demons stalking her count together collectively as a group. They receive one point for the fog touching them as they walk. That is point #3.

That's the first set.

Maggie is then shown to have the fog touching her lower legs as point #1.

She's switched from holding the bag for zipping to holding it as a bag with the handles. That's an altered enough touch for point #2.

She has an odd little self-mouth touch for point #3.

That's the second set.

Crowley is watching the scene happen. When he realizes what is going on, he runs to stop the demons from doing anything to Maggie, representing himself as with her. He is visibly touched by the fog and receives point #1 for him and Maggie.

The demons are shown running and stopping, so their touch with the fog has altered to receive point #2 for them.

Crowley asks the question "Who are you?" as point #3 for him and Maggie.

That's the third set.

Maggie gets a point for the step in front of the bookshop as point #1.

She gets another point for the doorknob with her thumb visibly touching that doorknob as point #2.

Crowley is saying the question, "Who sent you?" at the same time Maggie's touches are happening as point #3.

That's the fourth set.

Crowley removes one of the masks on a demon. That's point #1.

He asks the question set, "What are you doing here? What are any of you doing here?" The questions are probably too similar to be separated so that's point #2.

A demon removes a mask as she answers, "Give us the Angel," so that's point #3.

That's the fifth set.

Another demon removes a mask as point #1 and says Gabriel's name for point #2.

Now the game is really messing with me on this part, so I am very unsteady in telling you my play here. I am amused if I'm right though.

Crowley yells, "You are out of order!"

That is a statement of place. The game treats statements like those as a Hello, but we are well past when a Hello should be said since they've been interacting for a few sets. Oh! The "Hello" is out of order. He's playing with the words to get away with his variation of a Hello here. Crowley is such a sneaky snake in this game.

To further signify, that this "Hello" is out of order, it's his good-bye because he doesn't say anything to the demons and leaves. That's the end of the interaction instead of the start of one.

That's the sixth set.

Crowley makes a run for the bookshop. He receives a point for the touch on the rug, a point for a touch on the doorknob with his thumb, and a point for a touch on the push plate with a good chunk of his hand while showing that the thumb is touching the astragal. That's his solo set to close out the scene. He crossed the threshold that is the edge of the sidewalk and the threshold that is the door to the bookshop in the process.

That would be a seventh set.

...

Time to pay attention to the pockets.

The Tied Hands still do not look to be retied.

If Crowley receives Overhead Lights, he gets one for his actual head based on a light in the coffee shop as he sees the demons arrive.

The Belt Head then gets one that is also in the coffee shop, visually above one of the headlights for Crowley's Bentley.

The main self-pocket made of interest is that if the Tied Hands are still tied as they are nonetheless, they help make a pocket. It forms when he says, "Who are you?" Part of the tie strands are visually over Crowley's left hand.

He brushes his left thumb joint against the back of his jacket soon after.

Lights are reflected in Crowley's sunglasses before he yells, "You are out of order!" There's also a conceivable pocket of hair in the movement.

...

Story Commentary

Maggie is the only visible human in the street in this scene, indicating the supernatural zone is nearly finished taking shape at the start of the scene. The other humans in the street have been phased out from the supernatural zone. Crowley's car is the only visible car in the scene as well to further clue into this zone existing and that its existence stems from Crowley himself.

With so many demons around, the zone has taken on a greenish tint, reminiscent of Hell.

Crowley saying, "You can't just manifest and cause trouble, there are rules," was my choice for a quote to introduce the Earthly Objects game in my main post about them way back before I split the post into three parts with a main link. I still use it in the first of those 3 posts.

I think it is a clue the story gives about the existence of the game. I'm not sure on this part, but I rather like to think that what he means is that with his high tier play, if the rules are followed properly, then you can manifest and cause trouble.

When Crowley closes the door, that's my best guess for the indication that the supernatural zone is officially finished taking shape.

...

It has been pointed out by other people I follow who also post about Good Omens 2 that this wording of, "You are out of order!" implies the scene itself is chronologically out of order.

Such as a thing is currently over my head since the scene itself otherwise fits into the story we are given based on things like Crowley's sunglasses, the meeting known to be intended for Thursday, Shax saying they would leave at nightfall, the clues Maggie was already invited, and the known scene of Crowley reminding Maggie of the meeting. I think the story has at least two drafts, but if this scene is from a different draft compared to scenes around it, I currently don't really see any advantage to such a conclusion.

There is a matter of rank that I'll mention too.

The "order" is a potential clue about Crowley's past rank as an angel.

Crowley is not working for Hell at the given moment, but he makes it sound like he would outrank these demons if he did still work for Hell. Additionally, the sideburns have implied a potential rank status from the bookshop and latent memory in Gabriel as an angel.

The bookshop space and the car space are connected with this supernatural zone active, so that rank is possibly activated.

Granted, if the rank is activated, Crowley either can't or still won't use his power to actually remove the demons from the supernatural zone.

...

That's it for this post. Sometimes I edit my posts, FYI.

...

Main post:

The Sideburns Scheme

[love-has-a-way-ofgrowingbackward]

look guys there's something weird as HELL going on with aziraphale. all three minisodes we saw gave us an insight on how his brain works and his beliefs and everything and how it leads to him making the choices he's made. right.

crowley said something weird has been going on before the attack and we know he has a sixth sense for these things but WHAT IS IT.

i think i REALLY REALLY THINK there's going to be flashbacks to season 2 scenes in s3 and we'll get context and ohhh moments. like.

1. at the mystic shop crowley puts his cap on a snake. maybe just a sneaky nod to how he was wearing a cap but maybe something more?

2. i think the way metatron says "how predictable" and when he says "are you going to take it" so deliberately. they're huge huge clues i think. i feel like the metabitch knows something i dont which pisses me off.

3. i dont understand why the job scene was shot a little different to other ones and also why crowley and aziraphale sounded so different from the scene chronologically before and after that we see in s1. except maybe the seaside bit the whole thing was. definitely odd. and its also mentioned again and again and again. biggest question i have and also one of the biggest foreshadowing in the show is the job quote from the matchbox. what is that WHY IS THAT.

will we realise parts of the job scene were fake or left out and see in s3 how the line was relevant.

4. WHAT does metatron want from aziraphale sooo badly that he went to the trouble of going through his entire earth file and carefully construct manipulation plans a through to z to convince aziraphale to come up.

unless he was unnerved that they together blocked gabriel from him and left him in the dark while actively trying not to do something powerful and he wants armageddon 2 so he can destroy earth because he's the bad guy. and he cant even feasibly start on that as long as aziraphale and crowley are together/friends/as long as, metaphorically, the bookshop is theirs.

(the bookshop wasn't 'theirs' by the time crowley left i think. they'd sort of mentally given up on that which is why at the end muriel could enter without permission i think. if the south downs thing ends up being canon then maybe the bookshop will be destroyed for real because otherwise at the end they would end up at the bookshop)

5. look one of the most terrible thing in the whole ep6 was aziraphale not paying any attention to crowley in the beginning of the confession. he's really really flustered and there's a heartwrenching theme of him staring out of the window. he's absolutely terrified of the metatron seeing them and half his mind is on him.

aaaaaghhhh losing my fucking mind. you could almost hear the quote about the straightforward love life when crowley looks at nina and maggie. that feels like a conclusion kind of? like a really happy ending just like beelzebub and gabriel had. they're both good and loved. which is why i dont feel like we'll be seeing them majorly again... maybe we will i hope we will but idk. there's.

season 2 was soft gentle romantic definitely but it was also a sherlock holmes level of mystery. except we're at the start of the story when holmes doesn't get all the facts to solve the mystery.

also random not plot related questions.

why does the sandwich woman blink so much in the seamstress scene and why does aziraphale blink so little during the last lift scene. these probably dont mean anything other than the womans mascara got in her eye or something

how does the bentley play classical music which doesnt change for aziraphale but doesn't do that for crowley? is it love i hope its love

why does aziraphale's face do something odd when he leaves crowley to talk to nina ep5? or am i reading too much into it? he was very forthcoming with the rest but with nina he was sort of quiet (?) and reserved and went away looking uncomfortable.

why did aziraphale want so badly to drive crowleys car? was it meaningful or connecting to him? i know a lot of people say the dont hesitate to ask me any questions about love scene was aziraphale giving crowley horny eyes but i thought he seemed itching and really eager to get the keys? why does he want them sooo desperately. i don't fully understand their relationship which makes me WANT TO. what happens to a person when they spend six thousand years with their only friend and companion being a hereditary enemy, watching every single thing they do?

also why was he willing to give away a book and bribe out a book for the meeting? seems overboard for someone who doesn't really seem to think about heaven checking on nina and maggie. i think tbh it had less to do with heaven's suspicions than aziraphale being the kind of person who would love an excuse to host a night of dancing and food and love (mood) and he even got to participate by dancing with the demon he loves instead of just watching! (though i suspect he really likes that as well). hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

guys the brain rot has set in someone tell me im not imagining things

[rebeccasteventaylor]

Can’t help but wonder, after the Metatron says ‘the second coming’ and Aziraphale is obviously shocked, when he glances over, very quickly, to Crowley, is he trying to convey a message?

They were never really good at talking to each other but they could say a lot in a glance at moments of stress. Centuries working together, they must be able to communicate something about danger and warning in a glance.

I mean, he knows Crowley is there, he glanced out of the window towards him a few times.

Perhaps when he went into the bookshop he truly believed he was going to heaven to do good, to fix things and give Crowley what he thinks Crowley has always wanted - his angelic status back - but as soon as he’s hears the words ‘the second coming’ he knows he’s made a dreadful mistake. You can see the ‘oh shit’ look on his face. And that final glance at Crowley is one last desperate try to get a message to him, somehow, to warn him, to let him know what Aziraphale is doing.

I mean, Aziraphale can be sneaky. He is clever. I think that lift ride up to Heaven is him preparing himself to play the role of a lifetime - saving Earth, and hoping than somehow Crowley understood on that one brief glance.

[kayaa18]

i have a sneaky feeling a very particular demon wrote Aziraphale's description but had to fake not knowing how to spell. Who else will write AVVOID like a complete tool but then say Repulsively soft hands. And also the "report any interactions to the demon Crowley" like yeah lover boy, tell 'em. No one talks to your boy without supervision.

btw i really love the spelling of suspishus. It's exactly how I read words in my head as a non-native English speaker

Edit: just wanna add, Aziraphale is slaying in that picture

[ineffableigh]

Thinking a lot about Crowley's 'modern' costume/style when I...

I love that Aziraphale is perceived as having Old Fashioned Unchanging clothes and Crowley dresses 'modern' but he really, really doesn't.

His shirt is in the style of early 20th century men's shirt without the separate collar (those were separate pieces for a long time, like Beelzebub's collar! It's a heavily starched separate item.) and his jacket is very much styled like early 20th century women's jackets were. Not sure about the pants yet.

His Sneaky Spy Turtleneck is an exception of course lol.

WAIT MR BROWN OF BROWN'S WORLD OF CARPETS WEARS A TURTLENECK TO THE BALL HE DOESN'T WEAR ONE AT THE PUB MR BROWN IS A SPY????

man now i gotta rewatch the whole thing again and log turtlenecks

Edit: OK turtleneck log from The Ball:

Mrs Sandwich - no turtleneck

Mr Brown - TURTLENECK. Doubly weird now that he does also still have his damn clipboard and duck headline. Also that he throws himself into the woodchipper so to speak, and magically survives AUDIBLY being crunched up by demons. Could also be a Red Herring turtleneck since it only appears during the Ball, so it could represent Aziraphale not really trusting him, since we know he's been very actively avoiding Mr. Brown forever.

Ms Cheng - suspiciously watching the Hellevator, but NO turtleneck before or after the ball.

Mutt - TURTLENECK!!! Spouse does not. It's a turtleneck UNDER his regular garb. Now I gotta check the invite scene... OK, he has one here too so it may well be a red herring OR the Truest Turtleneck of All. I WAS wondering about "Under no circumstances can I therefore be..." as it's just such an odd phrasing.

Justine - tall collar, bit iffy on calling it a turtleneck but very possible.

Mr Arnold (music guy?) - no turtleneck

Nina and Maggie - interestingly, neither have anything close to a turtleneck

Lady Dressed in Leopard Print - I'd assumed this was one of Mrs Sandwich's ladies but now I don't know who it is. She DOES have a tall collar.

Uhhh okay but there were WAY MORE PEOPLE partying in the bookshop than Crowley brought out with them. Maybe just the camera angles/framing but that's. Very odd and noticeable. No sign of Leopard Lady for example.

[purpie-goddess]

On The Crow Road by Ian Banks in Good omens.

Sharp-eyed watchers may have noticed this book's appearance in the opening credits, on the back of a chair beside Terry Pratchett, or that Gabriel reads the first line in the bookshop "It was the day my grandmother exploded". Most watchers will have noticed the emphasis the camera puts on the book Muriel reads, which they hold at an odd angle, reminiscent of The Truman Show's hidden advertisements. Having noticed this in the intro, I had to look more into this book.

The Crow Road follows a man called Prentice at the age of 22, but also as a child. It's a slice-of-life book with romantic subplots and a strong nihilist theme as Prentice wrestles with religion. The book is non-linear and non-chronological, jumping from present to past at will. The cast doesn't change either, and the only clue the audience is given to understand if a chapter is past or present is tenses- present Prentice is first person, while child Prentice is third person.

The memories are seemingly random and although they sometimes have links to present Prentice, the only real connection is Prentice himself.

The other important thing to mention here is that when everything shifts at page 300, so does the genre. It's no longer a cutesy slice-of-life book, it's a murder mystery.

And religion is very important to this story. Prentice's desire to believe in afterlife is staunchly rebutted by his father's atheism. It all seems very pointless and random. His father (spoiler) does actually die during the book, leading Prentice to wonder if his father went to heaven, or as an atheist, was condemned. "The Crow Road" is his grandmother's name for someone who's died- they've gone to the crow road.

That is, until page 300, when the story actually starts, and you realise all this has been a set up. The payoff in this book is late.

Now comes the murder mystery. In reading this I wondered if this is a setup/payoff format for Gabriel in Good Omens- as Prentice looks into the disappearance of his uncle Rory many years ago and finds out (spoiler!) he was murdered. The book ends with Prentice understanding what love really means (his soulmate has been right in front of him all along!) and coming to terms with religion and loss.

There are a few things I can see very obviously linked to season 2.

the non-linear storytelling. The minisodes are inserted seemingly at random and sometimes barely have any reason to be there. The book of Job, for example, was offhandedly mentioned by Gabriel at one point in the episode. Why show us forty minutes of it if all we need to know was that they met Job once?

Religion and nihilism- obviously. Aziraphale grapples with his understanding of good/bad through a religious lens, while Crowley has disregarded it all.

the romantic subplot and slice-of-life genre- season 2, for the most part, feels a lot more romantic than season 1, and most scenes with our favourite angel and demon do feel very slice-of-life.

first person/third person. Aziraphale narrates the minisodes via a journal he keeps. In the present, however, we aren't guided by a narrator at all, implying it to be third person omnipotent.

But why is it so important to the story?

I can't say for sure. Maybe Neil Gaiman was trying to emphasise the three things I've already pointed out. I believe it more likely, however, that good omens hasn't reached page 300 yet. Having read "The Magic Trick You Didn't See" essay just last night, the Crow Road seems to back up this theory perfectly. I'll link it in case you don't know what I'm referring to.

I wish I could come up with a perfect theory based on what i've found, but right now I'm at a loss. I'm sure you can do more with this than I can :)

[ddagent]

Merry Christmas for you have any John and Dlenna holiday hcs? Or some ineffable husbands?

I didn't have the chance to answer this before Christmas, so please have some Ineffable Husbands NYE headcanons!

Being immortal beings, the passage of time doesn't really affect Aziraphale and Crowley. Having said that, Aziraphale has always enjoyed the sense of community and joy heralding the new year - Crowley has always preferred the after (specifically failed resolutions; he was, at least according to Hell's records, responsible for the up-tick in gym memberships and the concept of Dry January).

In the early 1600s, Aziraphale and Crowley were both in Scotland to celebrate Hogmanay. Aziraphale was there for a blessing; Crowley was there to sow the seeds of discontent (he liked the bonfires). But while Aziraphale hoped to bring joy, local tradition kept him from being the first-footer for the locals. So, with a mild persuasion, Crowley completed Aziraphale's blessings for him - and was the first person to enter Aziraphale's cottage after midnight.

1853, New York City. Aziraphale is there to guide a young woman of fortune into a suitable match. Crowley uses the festive traditions on New Years Day of an open door to encourage as many young men (and a few women) to visit the household, leading to Aziraphale swatting Crowley on the arm and them sharing a sneaky tipple of champagne in the parlour.

1906, London. The Ritz opened the previous May and Aziraphale has a table there to celebrate New Year's Eve. For some reason, he booked a table for two. It's a subdued evening, although Aziraphale is kissed by a redheaded waiter who had been rather attentive all night. The next time Aziraphale attends the Ritz on NYE, its with Crowley and the year is 1949.

2019, Soho. The Whickber Street Traders Association hosts a big blow out on New Year's Eve, with a food truck and live music and actual fireworks. Mister Brown is never sure how the permits were arranged but Aziraphale thought they all deserved a nice treat after, well, the apocalypse. Crowley and Aziraphale get very drunk and there is a hastily pressed kiss to Crowley's cheek when the clock strikes midnight that is never, ever mentioned again.

[fuckyeahgoodomensfanfic]

Good Omens Fic Rec: Enemies Closer

He still wasn’t sure how he was going to explain this to head office. Probably something along the lines of keeping his enemies closer. Though ‘enemy’ didn’t seem to fit Aziraphale anymore. Certainly they were still Enemies, but Crawly had never put much stock in the whole hereditary destiny crap. [6000 years of Crowley adapting to humanity and this terrible, sneaky thing called love.]

Length: 69,086 words

AO3 Rating: Explicit / Spice Level 🔥🔥

Best for: Mostly Safe in Public, Through the Ages, Comedy, Slow Burn, Taking Breaks

Triggers: None

Read it here, fic by Laur

*Minor Spoilers* If you've ever wished for an extended version of the historical montage from S1 E3, then you need to read this story. This is an excellent through the ages story that fits so well into the established canon. It's not necessarily a comedy but it's hilarious! There are dozens of moments I laughed out loud in this. The dialogue is so reminiscent of the show it's just delightful. This story has such good pacing, never dragging out scenes for too long. You'll go through many years but in a more vignette form, small moments that our pair can reminisce over later. It'll tackle some rough patches, moments of grief and despair during human wars and plagues, but it doesn't give into melodrama.

An ongoing theme here will be questioning Heaven, Hell, and God. A line I saved for myself was, "It's incredible what violence humans will commit when they think God's on their side". I think some fics forget what these concepts mean in real life and just use them to keep Crowley and Aziraphale apart. This story isn't afraid to make us think about what religion has done to humanity over the years. In the end, it invites our characters, and us, to try to make peace with the fact that we will never get our questions answered.

Couple other highlights that I want you to look out for: an actual demon/angel on your shoulder moment, birds, a hug, don't get high with your crush, all of chapter 10, the deleted bookshop opening scene,*waves hands* gay vibes, and Turkish baths. I just really recommend this one. It's very entertaining and feels like it belongs in the canon. Some minor sex scenes towards the end but you'll be fine in public for the most part. It's not a super long read but if you can't commit a full sitting and need something to go back and forth with, I think this is a good pick.

Read it here, fic by Laur