#ConsciousnessandtheLayersofMind

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Episode 32 - What Occurs in the Mind When We Meditate?

Exploring The Mysteries Of Meditation In this episode, I dive deep into the world of meditation and explore how it affects our minds. I discuss the assumptions we make about others' thought processes and consider how meditation might influence the depth of our thinking. I also examine the challenges faced by beginners starting meditation later in life due to the multitude of conscious thoughts and memories they must wade through. Throughout the episode, I explore the distinction between thought and mind, and how meditation can help us differentiate between the two. By understanding this difference, we can gain more control over our thoughts, improve focus, and ultimately achieve a sense of genuine freedom. Join me as I share my personal experiences and insights on meditation, contemplating the mysteries of the unconscious mind, and the power of self-reflection. Together, we'll unlock the secrets of taming the mind and delve into the benefits of meditation for enhancing mental clarity and well-being. Timestamps:- Mental activity of meditation nad its connection to the unconsious mind (00:22)- Assumptions and self-reflection (02:17) - Mental freedom and clarity in the Age of the Algorithm (03:40) - Carving the path t0 mental freedom (05:04) - The Battle of Meditation (06:24) - Yoga is yoking the mind (07:25) - Increasing the Mind while decreasing thought (08:53) - Learning the difference between thought and mind (10:19)Click to Read Full Transcript Read the full article

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Podcast Transcript - S2EP20 - The Veil of the Unknown

Podcast Transcript - S2EP20 - The Veil of the Unknown

Audio and Show Notes I knew after the first season that I’d get much more personal and detailed with the personal details, but I didn’t expect it to get as in depth as I have. Speaking about each of the mysterious experiences I’ve witnessed, especially from a chronological order has been eye-opening. If you’ve been following along and meditating and contemplating on the entirety of this season, perhaps you understand what writing and recording the audio for these episodes has done for me, and what doing these exercises periodically does for an individual. I’ve essentially just done the examination of conscience prayer, or what has been expressed by others with near-death experiences—including myself—as the life review, or one’s life flashing before their eyes. Doing it in this reflective manner occurs at a much slower and steadier pace of course versus the feeling of timelessness that occurs during the mystical experience itself but is still essentially the same thing. I actually don’t know what to add to this episode that wasn’t summarized in the first episode of the podcast when I gave an overview of the months leading up to the mystical experience of Ascending to the Temple of the Father. Everything that occurred is so condensed, so compact, in such a short period of time, one day after another new revelations exploding in my mind that it’s difficult to talk about in a way that makes sense for the listener or reader. With my mind now exploding anew, dozens of books read, coupled with dozens of Great Courses, now called Wondrium courses, listened to and watched, all knowledge that existed within me began to coalesce in rapid fire towards piercing through the veil of illusion and seeing the eternal and real. So, I will have to go to my notes in this episode and as such, I’m already anticipating that I may sound much more mechanical and boring versus the previous episodes. Though I have mountains of journal entries and notes for everything that’s been explained throughout this season, sitting down and actually drafting it has been rather easy. These experiences have always remained in my conscious memory as giant foam fingers pointing to the spiritual and to the experience of God. But much like there was very little I could point to prior to the near-death death experience, specifically because that event became such a catalyst for the next phase of my life, so too during these brief three and a half months after my dream of the statue of Anubis and the goddess Isis, all is a blur, since the new nexus point in my mind has become the mystical experience of Ascending to the Temple of the Father on March 25th, 2018. But I will try to put the pieces together, both for myself, as well as for those listening and reading. I was still heavy into conspiracy stuff at this time, and as I mentioned, there’s something about holding different paradigms of thought in the mind that aids in this explosion of seeing the exact same connections and patterns and symbols, though apparently different, hidden behind the veil of the seen that ultimately reveals the unseen. All conspiracy stuff ended though after these experiences beyond what I’ve expressed as the media driven politically motivated stuff, and even that has rarely seeped through over these past four years. I’m mentioning this because I was reading about the Virginia elections, today being November 4th and two days after, and I was thinking about why was I reading into this and how long has it been since I even peered into these political type things? Well, I’m exactly a year removed from last years elections and the podcast episode that spoke on such things, so the cyclical nature of my mind seeking political news returned at the exact same time it had returned last year. Almost as if on cue, or due to the seasonality of politics and voting occurring in November. It’s a weird thing I’ve noticed after skimming through so many notes and meditating on such things, but it’s as if the mind, or consciousness itself has its own seasons. Like if you’ve ever woken up and wondered why on this day you were suddenly thinking of this song or movie or book, or this memory appears, or these thoughts are crossing your mind when they hadn’t the day before, especially without any external stimuli to conjure the memory or thoughts up, it seems as if there’s a cyclical aspect to the mind itself. I’ve spoken repeatedly of time being cyclical and though we can calculate and quantize time as humankind has for thousands of years, the concept of it still requires mental activity and thought for it to actually exist. Kind of like the old Buddhist riddle of if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to witness it, does it make a sound? Without humanity to contemplate time, does time exist? Anyways, there’s a seasonality of thoughts, as if whatever that part of consciousness that is consciousness and wherever it dwells in the mind revolves through the physical brain like a planet. It has its own grounding or the common and frequently used thinking, but during it’s revolutions within the physical aspect of the brain, the mind remembers or thinks of things that it hadn’t prior since it’s now moving through a storage section of the brain it hadn’t in a day, week, month, year, whatever the time period. Just a quick detour comment that I figured I’d toss in here. I’m only saying this because the conspiracy stuff I’d come across, was essentially conspiracy stuff I was coming across again. Right off the top of my head, I know that at the end of 2017, I’d come across the flat earth theory, or I guess a better way of wording it is flat earth revival during these handful of months leading up to March 25th, 2018, and the months after. If you read carefully in Lucifer Revealed towards the end, I express this a bit as the lies of a spherical universe shown through television as a way of taking a snapshot of what my thoughts were then. There are many aspects to this flat earth idea though, and I’ll give you all the details just so you know how at the very least seeing and contemplating the potentiality of lies having been slammed in your mind your entire life can aid in piercing the ultimate illusion and lie of one’s false self, versus the true, spiritual and immortal self. There were three aspects to the flat earth revival that had me thinking and even as I watched it, I remembered that back in 2010, when I said I’d first gotten into some of the conspiracy stuff, I’d watched things then that I’d forgotten, but had now revived in my mind while watching anew. I also expressed many of these various theories I’d come across as confusion in my mind in the opening of the Vision Explained Deeper work found at the logosofexperienceandtruth.com, and that all of this confusion required clarity. These are the three aspects to the flat earth and the questions that are raised by it that are either presented by the theory or what I came up with as well: 1) Obviously, is the Earth actually flat, and half a sphere and not an entire sphere? 2) Did we actually go to the moon in 1969? 3) Is there a firmament, or dome-like something up in low-earth orbit that creates the spherical shape and prevents us from leaving low-earth orbit regardless of what’s been shown on television and slammed into each and every one’s mind since birth for the past couple of generations. Now, I already stated my current stance on school and media driven material versus online conspiracy material. Believing one and denying the other is no different than believing one and denying the other, at least as it pertains to one’s perceptions of what is true and what is not true. For what is true and what is not true ultimately exists in the mind of each individual and regardless of what’s been shown, explained, or said to be proven, the acceptance and belief of whatever is seen as truth still rests in the mind of each. The issue for the mystic, or those that dive deeply within these understandings arises when a difficult question is asked of oneself in the search for truth. Did I choose to believe in everything I believe, or were those beliefs implanted into my mind by any of the various forms that could’ve transmitted the implantation of said belief? As an example, let’s use something non-conspiratorial that I’ve mentioned a few times: my stance on the Lotus position for meditation. Up until I’d actually tried to meditate, I’d seen people seated in the Lotus position but did not know that’s what it was called. I only tried to meditate in the position because I’d read and heard and seen a diagram of a straight line for the spine while meditating in this position and that it’s seen as the best position for meditating. So I tried it, and tried it, and tried it, but hated and hated it. However as a newbie, my mind wanted to accept what I’d read of it being the best position for meditating, but since my own personal experience and bodily sensations told me otherwise, I was able to reject this position as being the best for meditation for myself, understood even way back then in 2001 or 2002 that seeing it as the best position, though attested to with much proof and many millennia of examples and proof, it was still something that I had to conform my mind to believe. And if I believed it, then I’d believe it because I was being told to believe it, not because my experience was yielding the belief for me since my experience was telling me otherwise. The belief and understanding of the Lotus position as the best position for meditation is a paradigm of thought that revolves around its status as the best position. A paradigm of thought though, when looked at carefully, does not require conscious belief to be seen as true, for if dwelling within the paradigm one does not see any alternative for the alternative doesn’t exist within the paradigm, especially if the paradigm itself forces other paradigms out, and or fights to keep them out. Not saying that’s what occurs with the Lotus position in whatever religion or culture it’s held to such high regard, I’m just stating the reality of most paradigms of thought. Thus, the belief in the Lotus position as the best position for meditation doesn’t necessarily mean that it was consciously chosen by those that believe this postulation, and thus for those within the paradigm that the Lotus position is the best position for meditation, this can itself, now become part of the illusion of maya. There’s a famous scientific work on this paradigm idea. I can’t remember what it’s called, especially because I haven’t read the entirety of it and don’t own a copy of it and have only come across excerpts of it, but it’s on my buy list for future books to find when I make my round back to studying science again. But without any knowledge of this work, I understood this concept by meditating on which of these millions of voices and ideas within my mind were my own, and which ones had been given, injected, or slammed into my mind, specifically seen while meditating on if I believed in God, and why did I believe in God? I’ve already explained the why I believed in God: due to my near-death death experience, but that eventually because of the influence and obvious paradigm insertion into the works and ideas of St. John of the Cross, I began to purge this experience away from my mind as the basis for my faith and that it eventually led to a deeper Desert of the Soul experience versus solely getting rid of teachings I thought were whack, or abandoning spiritual phenomena that though cool to see and experience, didn’t really bring me any closer to both the understanding of God, or to experiencing God again. So again, the question, much like how in the first season I asked you to ponder if you’ve ever really had your own thought, so too if we dive deeper. Since thought is conscious and belief is subconscious: Did you come to believe each of your beliefs consciously, or were they implanted into your mind unawares due to living within the paradigm of belief and structure itself in whatever family, town, city, state, country, religion to which you were born, and that such beliefs simply insert themselves into the subconscious minds of those that dwell within the paradigm of belief? So let’s use a more hot button topic to explore this with. I’ll ask a question, two questions, and the question applies to both sides, since both sides are equally a paradigm when looked at carefully. And only you listening or reading can be honest with yourself on the answers to these questions. First question. Have you already made your decision regarding abortion? I’m positive that was probably a quick answer for most especially in the USA. Second question. Prior to reaching your decision on abortion, did you read the actual law and what the Chief Justices at the time said about Roe v Wade? I’ll pause for a bit, though I’m positive the majority listening or reading, on both sides, had to think about this one and that the majority have a “No,” response in their mind. The next question, which again, reveals the paradigm to which one exists, is if you didn’t read the actual law of Roe v Wade and yet reached your conclusion and decision regarding abortion, then how did you come to that conclusion or decision, and did you actually make a conscious decision that was not utterly dependent on the paradigm to which your mind exists, regarding abortion? If you’re within the paradigm and everything in the paradigm in which you exist is telling you and reflecting back to you the paradigm, then is the decision actually conscious? Are all beliefs that are believed in conscious, only some, or are any? You can ponder on this yourself and meditate and examine pretty much anything that you’ve accepted as truth: if you actually accepted it consciously, or if all you did was accept what the paradigm that you exist within has told you, and further, is doing this an actual conscious choice? For instance, and I may have done this already and if I did, sorry for repeating myself. The old Coke or Pepsi challenge. If I put a can of Coke and Pepsi in front of you and tell you to choose to drink one, how many choices of drink do you have? The majority will say Coke or Pepsi, for those are the two paradigms that one is being presented with and since its easier for humans to dwell within a paradigm, they will choose either Coke or Pepsi. But there are two other options that exist. Not partaking in the Coke or Pepsi challenge and or not drinking either if presented with the choice, or getting an empty glass and pouring them both into the same glass. So denying either of the paradigms one is presented with, or combining the different paradigms in some way are also options, though not quickly seen. See where I’m going with this? And as a caveat to the atheist or scientist that has listened thus far that thinks perhaps I haven’t actually considered the not believing side of God, hopefully my explaining the nature of the paradigm and my understanding of it as it pertains to actual conscious choosing and believing, and my desire to understand, root out, and find and fully make true conscious decisions, has washed that potential idea away. I said I’d been knee-deep in conspiracy stuff didn’t I? And that after my dream of Isis and Anubis, I had to dive into ancient history, right? Unfortunately, You Tubing ancient Sumerian for instance, brings with it a lot of conspiracy stuff. Going further, for the Catholic that delves into conspiracy stuff, there’s a whole megaton load of conspiracy stuff about the evil Catholic church and the evil popes and black popes. Then it got into the ancient alien theories of the Sumerian Annunaki beings and that the royalty in the world, including the Vatican, are really preserving these ancient blood lines of the aliens that came down and formed the world and that royalty are the descendants of the nephilim of Bible lore and thus contain blood or DNA of these otherworldly god-like beings, while the rest of the world are the mud-people that were created to serve them and many other such theories. Interesting that several other cultures have the same type of creation myth, but far pre-date modern conspiracy stuff. I think it was the Chinese or Japanese where the goddess first formed human beings, but got tired and exhausted from doing it by hand one at a time. So instead, I think she threw a bunch of rocks into the mud like in the Greek myth, or dragged a stick through the mud or something like that and the rest of the subservient humanity came from the flakes and dust, while those first handmade people become the elite or royal ones. If you understand this about thought, belief and the paradigms that exist within the mind, then the question is, or at least for me, how does one change the paradigm, truly? If I for instance believed everything these conspiracy things were speaking about regarding the Church and then moved or merged into the paradigm of disbelieving the Church and believing the conspiracy, then I would do nothing more than switch one paradigm for another and would still be subservient to the new paradigm. I could choose to ignore the paradigm to which I exist and/or ignore the paradigm of the conspiracy, but then I’d be choosing ignorance, and the learning mind of the human being typically won’t allow that, at least for very long. I could choose to shatter the paradigm to which I exist, or the new paradigm, by destroying either/or with knowledge of either/or, but then all that means is I destroyed one for the other and was simply existing in whichever paradigm I chose to champion. If I ignore my paradigm for another though, then in a way, I am ignoring my life, my past, the culture to which I was born, and will lose all memory and learning prior to the shift, for the shift itself would skewer the mind and the acquired ideas towards seeing the old as worthless compared to the new, even though one would have done nothing more than change one paradigm for another. Quite difficult when you break it down like this. But there is a path. There is a teaching. There is a way and it is the most difficult path possible when it comes to the paradigm of thought that exists within ourselves. It is quite possibly the most difficult of all the teachings of the Christ: love your enemies, which itself, was Christ creating a new paradigm of thought. This is not to say that every single paradigm one exists in creates an enemy out of every paradigm that is different, but it does have a tendency of occurring. For instance during my gaming years at first it was Nintendo versus Sega, then Sony versus Nintendo, then Sony versus Xbox. And the vitriol that both sides would heap upon one another for who’s system was the best was omnipresent everywhere anybody started talking about video games, even though both sides were doing the exact same thing: playing video games, though within the paradigm, or system, of choice. And the same patterns would arise. Some exclusively chose one or the other, some tried both but favored one over the other, and then some would buy all video game systems and say they were all the same, and then others would leave the console wars and go PC gaming since Apple wasn’t really a gaming system and thus wasn’t seen as a separate paradigm. Read the full article

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Episode 20 - The Veil of the Unknown

Piercing Through the Veil of the unknown The Bible states that at Christ’s death the veil to the temple was torn asunder. Though dramatic when viewing this in light of the claim of Christ being the rejected Son of God and this moment thus confirming His royalty, there is a deeper more mystical meaning behind this. There is a boundary buried deep within our mind that separates the known from the unknown, the physical/external and the invisible/internal, the chasm that separates Man from God. Entering into this boundary is the essence of mysticism, was and is the goal of both the ancient and modern Mysteries and the accomplishment of this merging of the duality of the internal and external, the microcosm and the macrocosm, body and mind, conscious and subconscious, even if it only occurs for an instant is what brings about the mystical experience and shows the Beatific Vision of God to the individual. But the veil must be removed, and it only occurs when Jesus dies on the cross or when we’ve died to ourselves to allow for the spiritual rebirth within. Many know of what I speak but how this is accomplished is difficult to convey. This episode will focus on the types of thoughts and the method of thinking and questioning that occurred during this time period that led to the drug-free mystical experiences I’ve spoken of across these 20 episodes of Season 1 and Season 2 of the Logos of Experience and Truth Podcast. Click Link for Transcript Timestamps: - The exercise of writing and speaking of these experiences is like the life review discussed in the near-death experience, just now in reality-land and not in some mystical experience (01:13)- Near-death experience in 2001 created a nexus point of thought and the next experience in 2018 shifted that center of gravity into the new (03:22) - Questioning and positing the cyclical nature of the mind and its seasons especially if no external or internal stimuli has triggered it (04:06) - Conspiracy material I’d been exposed to (Flat Earth Theory) and was contemplating during the time of the mystical experiences in 2018 (06:05) - Contemplating the lies purported in a conspiracy theory are meant to stimulate your mind to see the lie of the illusion of reality automatically created by your brain, what neuroscience calls simulation (06:44) - Stance on such conspiracy or alternative theories alongside one’s perceptions and beliefs if one can truly ask if they chose to believe in any belief that dwells inside of their mind or if the belief was slammed into their mind unawares (08:05) - The use of my stance on the Lotus position for meditation to illustrate the idea of whether or not choice determines a belief (09:01) - The use of the scientific concept of a paradigm to further illustrate this question of whether or not belief is actually chosen or implanted into the mind (10:19) - Do we believe consciously or is it subconscious? (12:43) - Next example of a paradigm of belief surrounding a more hot-button topic of abortion (13:14) - Another benign example using the Pepsi Challenge to further explore paradigms of thought and belief (15:09) - Further conspiracy material found online during this time period in 2018 (16:36) - Getting real after understanding that there are paradigms that exist in the mind and wondering how to change them (17:52) - The path Christ taught when it comes to paradigms (19:19) - Paradigms tend to create animosity or enemies of the opposing paradigm: video game wars used as an example (19:39) - The problem with paradigms of thought and beliefs is we think we’ve consciously chosen them all and thus assume our enemies have chosen their paradigms as well (21:19) - The venomous USA political media climate and the paradigms citizens exist in (22:28) - Challenging one’s paradigm or seeking to change it is difficult for it is like causing one’s own inner death (23:23) - Mysticism teaches one to identify the false self within and to find the real self but until one accomplishes this, the false self is seen as the real self (23:51) - To find God one must be willing to lose God (24:17) - Paradigm shift that occurred to me during this time was studying the Ancient Egyptian and Sumerian having never done so and causing a paradigm shift in my mind regarding religion and the mysteries (25:06) - Thor’s explanation in the Avengers of impermanence to speak on the paradox of duality (26:32) - Holding the paradoxes of duality in the mind are what pierce through the veil of the known and the unknown (27:32) - Remembering a video seen of Stanley Kubrick and the moon landing long ago (28:48) - Overview of the conspiracy topics considered regarding the moon and Flat Earth (29:34) - Using body/physical mysticism to make sense of the Flat Earth versus the Solar System ideas of the microcosm and macrocosm (31:35) - Clearest explanation of how merging the duality of the external and internal within the mind is what brings about the mystical experience of the Beatific Vision (33:54) - Using this mystery of the microcosm and macrocosm to explain a “reason” for Christ Incarnating physically (34:43) - You only see Christ in your mind when you realize that you only see Christ in your mind (35:25) - Mystical understanding of the Second Person of the Trinity (35:32) - There is no reconciliation between paradigms unless common ground is found (38:31) - The ultimate goal and hope and reason for the Logos of Experience and Truth website and podcast (38:43) - The image that unites each of these apparently different paradigms can be seen and studied at the logosofexperienceandtruth.com (39:40) - The current paradigm as determined after seeing the connection between the images of the Beatific Vision of God (40:57)

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Podcast Transcript - S2EP17 - Dissolution Experience and the End of the New Age

Podcast Transcript - S2EP17 - Dissolution Experience and the End of the New Age

Click link for Podcast Page I’ve mentioned the experience that I’m going to talk about in this episode several times but never the details to it since it’s too horrifying to my mind to place myself back in my shoes and relive it. Even though the near-death Awakening mystical experience was a far more visceral experience, this one terrified me and has continued to terrify me far more than thinking about whether I actually died or not, which is very interesting as I type these words. Maybe because it was the lack of drugs or drug use at this point and how immediate the presence, judgment and activity of God could so instantly send me and by extension, anybody else, straight to Hell, actual Hell here in the living present moment of now, without any of that fire and brimstone imagery, that renders this experience as not a fun one to draft or speak about. Just looking back at it, you would think after reading at least a hundred spiritual type works and having blasted through the Bible and sayings from the Saints and the Upanishads and the Quran and everything else I’d read, that there’s no way that God would send me to Hell, but that’s exactly what happened. And I can’t keep saying God. It was entirely my own fault and entirely my own doing, so the better way of saying it was that I’d created the opportunity that led me to this experience that left God no other option than to send me straight to Hell for an instant of time, but eternal time, since the experience was one of timelessness as well. How could I have fallen so decisively after having so decisively seen, experienced and accepted the reality and truth of God? It’s shocking. My hands are somewhat trembling as I type this right now. I know I’ve pointed the finger at New Age type teachings as being responsible for my fall, so though I have zero recollection of the names of the works read, I will try to explain the ideas that I had acquired and held in my mind at this time and how they contributed to my downfall. The experimenter in me is also responsible and because of this, I ceased experimenting on spiritual phenomena for many years after this. Let this be a warning ahead of time for the listener or the reader of this work. There are teachings that seem and appear to be genuine and authentic, but they are ever so subtly just a bit off, ever so subtly not truth, and ever so subtly lead one down the road to perdition. And I can say this because I experienced it. I may get flamed for this by any that practice New Age type teachings and have never been given the punishment of God that I received for thinking these ideas and thoughts and practices and beliefs, but maybe it’s because they never took them to the extremes like I did, like when I spoke about my idiot trust walk as I tested the limits of synchronicity. The point is if one takes these at first glance amazingly written teachings to their ultimate endpoint, the subtle differences, the subtle lies that are exposed the further one treads upon these paths, those that follow them as I did, may find the result is not as pleasant as at first glance. The primary teaching that directly led to this experience is the one of self-divinity. And explaining this is difficult because the gift of faith as I read directly from the Catechism of the Catholic church in episode three of the podcast is a type of divinity, or an idea of divinity as the prize or gift of faith in God, much like the parable of the pearl Jesus speaks of. But if you’re listening closely or closely reading that sentence, it is a gift, and not something that is claimed or taken or self-proclaimed. And thus, we come full circle to my book Lucifer Revealed and the discussion of the taking of the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil and what was received from this and as the ancient story presents it, what all humanity received, along with what was given up, or withheld by God because of this. “That they had become like the gods,” by eating the fruit, is what Genesis tells us is the real reason God gets angry, and thus the fruit of immortality, or life, had to be removed because being like the gods had been taken by humanity, instead of given by God. I’ve also mentioned that this is what is referred to in the Gospel of John when Jesus says that thieves and robbers enter by other means, but the good shepherd enters through the gates, and that there is a guardian at the gates almost all mythology and all religions speak of in some way since the robbers may reach the gates, but they cannot enter fully by such means. It’s all very mystical, very difficult to see and understand this stuff if you haven’t ventured this far down the Narrow Path of the mysteries of the Christ, God the Father and the Holy Spirit. I have a theory that I’ll present right now that the mystical aspects of the Bible are meant for those of us that have seen and experienced, that have been tempted as Jesus was in the desert with the use of the spiritual powers of transmutation, when the Devil tempts him to turn the stones into bread and to eat, or to call down the angels to carry him from falling, or trying to use spiritual powers or energies in magical ways. The normal practitioner of Christianity, one that lives a life of faith alone, never has these types of experiences and such temptations never come their way, for they’ve never pierced that veil of the known and the unknown beyond what the sacraments are meant to bestow upon the believer. But those that have pierced through, and especially in this modern age but still very much alive throughout the pages of the history of the Bible and the world, those that have pierced through, especially through drug use, are the robbers and thieves that have arisen to the loftiest of places mentally but have not actually traversed through the Narrow Path to find or be blessed with it. And thus, for the drug using mystic, if it can be seen within the microcosm of the self, the story in Genesis becomes the story of the self having reached for the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil and acquired it without God’s permission, and thus the fruit of life and immortality is withheld or removed, even if you’ve already been baptized since you’ve literally undone the baptism that washed away the Original version of this that occurred to humanity at whatever unknown mystical time it occurred. I know there’s different ideas regarding this within different sects of Christianity, of whether salvation can be lost or not. I’m not going to sit here and say yay or nay for anybody other than myself, but since I came to understand that reaching this interior holy place where I witnessed God as a complete sinner was the taking of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, I do believe that one can lose their salvation, primarily if they’ve already seen and experienced what can be called divine. If you know any of the inner theology around the Devil, or the reason why the Devil is cast out eternally, you will see the similarity to what I’m trying to illustrate here. Only difference at least in that case is that since the Devil was an eternal being the choice to turn away from God was an eternal choice, where even if we gained salvation through baptism, experienced God, and turned away from God, we are still capable of receiving forgiveness if we turn back to God, for we are mortal. The other reason for this distinction in my mind is that as opposed to those that haven’t had any spiritual experience and rely entirely on faith, if they falter, they have nothing to fear since they have no actual experience of the reality of God beyond that faith. But if you have had experience, and have seen already, then to turn from this is a super-giant big no-no on the level of the Devil turning away from God. Thus the story in Eden and Genesis doesn’t just begin the story of humanity in the Christian idea or worldview, it also begins the story of those of us that took the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, or reached for divinity on our own before having it gifted by God through the walking of the Narrow Path of the Christ, regardless of whether we were aware of what we were doing at the time, like through drug use. Again, difficult stuff to explain and probably to hear or comprehend. And I can offer little to no recourse unfortunately. You either know what I’m talking about because you’ve either been there or you are there, now as you’re listening or reading this, and you’re realizing that the fount of your spirituality comes from reading some cool stuff online or from a couple of You Tube videos, or from a book Oprah recommended, or like me, from seeing some crazy shit while doing drugs. Or you have no idea what I’m talking about. Plenty of myths alongside the opening of the Bible that speak of the punishment given by the gods to those humans that try to scale Mount Olympus for instance. So let me at least try to discuss this idea of self-divinity as I understood it from the reading of New Age type texts so that perhaps what I’m alluding to can become a little bit clearer. That Jesus himself says that we are like the gods is the oft quoted verse that I came across in these works that spoke of realizing our own self-divinity. Yet the entire lesson of Jesus found in the mysteries is that though fully God, he emptied himself of the fullness of that divinity to become man, specifically so that he could follow the will of the Father as a man. Let’s dive deeper. When you become Christian, especially in the Catholic Church, if you’re a baby when baptized obviously you’re not conscious in the sense that we’re conscious when we get older of the words used in the prayers, but that’s why there’s the confirmation sacrament, so that you accept the baptism as a fully conscious person. But in the prayers for confirmation, just as during Baptism, just as in the Nicene Creed, what is being acknowledged? That Jesus Christ is the only Son of God. The very act of doing this, negates, relinquishes, releases the person from the Original Sin as most clearly spoken of and taken up by the Church ever since St. Augustine explained it. How is this achieved? By acknowledging Jesus Christ as the only Son of God, in a mystical, eternal, universal way, we are saying as well that we are not gods ourselves and are thus acknowledging the sovereign nature of God the Father, through the mortal expression of Himself as the Son, Jesus Christ. It’s strange stuff I know but the only way to explain further is to contrast this with the New Age type teachings that have permeated throughout the modern world and aren’t really called New Age anymore, but twenty years ago that’s what these types of teachings and interpretations were referred to as. The Mysteries are very clear. Jesus says we are like the gods, Jesus says that in the coming Kingdom we will be like him, adopted children of the living Father, but Jesus only says this after his temptation in the Desert when he’s renounced all spiritual powers that activate or enable one to control reality. If one has not gone through this process of the Desert of the Soul, or the walking of the Narrow Path, and one is engaged in these spiritual practices, then one is using essentially the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil that conferred upon humanity a likeness to the gods and is thus denying the ultimate sovereign nature of The Father by claiming their own divinity through their own freewill. The theology of the Devil should be chiming in your mind after that last sentence. For further proof of this, you have to venture out of the canonical works in the Bible and into the Books of Enoch. Whatever your idea about this work in the present moment is must be placed aside so that you can see it in the context of the time of Jesus. The work had been seen as holy and inspired back then. I think if I remember correctly, several copies of Enoch were found in the Qumran tombs of the Essenes where the Dead Sea Scrolls have been found. So the ideas found within this work were the ideas present in the minds of those that came before Jesus, those that came after, and most likely Jesus himself. In it, it says that the lawlessness that God refers to in the Bible in the start of the Noah story, or the reason for bringing the flood, is all manner of esoteric magical practices like divination, soothsaying, fortune-telling, etc, that were taught essentially by angels, evil angels, to mankind. And if you interpret this beyond the classical idea of angel or devil, they were all spiritual practices that had been discovered or channeled and used by human beings, and such things would actually continue to plague both the Israelites as well as all the ancient world and even right on up to today, even after the flood. Again, regardless of your belief level in such things, such things were believed to be true and possible throughout the pages of the Bible and across the entire ancient world. If you go way back to King Saul I think it was, he consults essentially a witch to raise the spirit of the dead prophet Samuel since the King is desperate for answers from his now dead former prophet. And this witch was capable of achieving this, which alone should be an eye-opener if you’ve never bothered to read the Old Testament or have forgotten this story from Sunday school. There was also the strange Urim and Thurim divinatory medals or stones or medallions that were on the breast plate of Aaron and beyond that provided some sort of yes or no divinatory 8-Ball of knowledge response to the high priest of Israel. First thing that popped in my mind when I read that with new eyes was why did Aaron need these when Moses was still present with the people and was speaking to God on their behalf? Considering some of the other strange things in the text of the Old Testament and the different epochs of composition scholars have been able to identify, seems like an easy editorial addition to my mind during the priestly editorial time period to give credence to the divinatory practice the high priests had now become addicted to after their contact with Persia and the high divination that Persia possessed, and further, the reason why the prophets in the Bible were constantly thrashing such practices to bits. So, the modern idea of being self-divine or realizing your divinity, which as you can see, isn’t really a modern idea, is that understanding the concept and bringing it into your conscious mind will awaken the divine consciousness within and thus grant one divinity. Or rather, kind of like Plato or one of the other Greek philosophers taught, I can’t remember exactly which one, but that ancient philosophical idea that we learn nothing in life and what we are actually doing is remembering what we already knew somehow in the pre-existent past or by piercing through to seeing and understanding the archetypes of existence. Those familiar with the Gnostic texts will see the similarity to this idea, remembering that we are light beings or a fragment of the eternal that has been speckled across the face of the Earth and the act of remembering this through gnosis, releases this enchained speckle of the eternal from the mortal and returns it to the eternal upon death. Much the same is taught in the Eastern religions though with different language and variations of course. But the West, to my eyes at least, seems to have always been far more obsessed with humans, especially humans of high station being called gods. The Pharaoh’s of Egypt considered themselves gods. Caesar after his death was called a god and then all Caesar’s afterwards were also seen as living gods. This might also by why in the Old Testament Moses himself is referred to as God in a couple instances that can be real head scratchers when you come across these passages if they haven’t been edited out in a weak translation. Several of the Greek Philosophers, especially Pythagoras was seen as a god after his death, and as I stated earlier, the Catechism of the Church even teaches that there’s a type of divine life that is achieved or lived or blessed upon when one enters the Kingdom of Heaven or has experienced the Beatific Vision that could be seen and or renders such a person as being a type of god since such a person is now placed in Heaven, just with a different name in the Church, as that of a Saint. I’m trying to lay each of these things so that you can see the subtle differences that I was referring to. While living, being called a god, or after death, being called a god or a Saint. Being born into royalty and somehow automatically being conferred with the title of god or having lived a rigorous life of devotion and study as Pythagoras or St. Anthony of the Desert, and in turn, those generations afterwards calling them a god or a Saint. Smoking some dope and seeing the invisible realities and suddenly you’ve become a self-help guru that has self-realized divinity, or constant daily meditation and the rigor of a devotional life and abandonment of the spiritual powers to receive the mystical experience as blessing and gift that essentially accomplishes what all have spoken of as the prize of spirituality. Or as Jesus puts it: many will choose the wide-open path; few will follow the Narrow Path. Again, I can speak on this because I’ve gone through both. As soon as I started coming across the ideas found in these works, and realizing I’d seen what I’d seen and experienced what I’d experienced, and that the overwhelming majority of people I spoke to, along with the overwhelming majority of the works I’d read with authors that never spoke of their own personal experiences, I realized I’d encountered something rare, and since rare, valuable, and since valuable, high and lofty, and since high and lofty, exceptional, and since it had occurred to me, thus I was each of these, and since each of these, it meant that in reality, I existed on my own as my own self-made divinity, and since I was my own self-made divinity, the thought that began to form in my mind was that I no longer needed God the Father, since as my own god, why was I continuing to pray to this imaginary God the Father? I had healed myself and others. I was manifesting empty parking spots in crowded supermarket parking lots before I showed up. I would dream or meditate of experiences and then experience them in a way. Not always exactly what was meditated or dreamt, but enough to where I could make the connection to what had been experienced. I was in complete control of my thoughts by this point and had conquered that impressionistic empath effect I mentioned in an earlier episode and capable of not only detaching my thoughts from the swarm of voices surrounding me in a crowd, but also not thinking anything in my mind other than the periodic thought of returning to the state of emptiness of mind when I caught the mind wanting to wander and attach itself to whatever mental stimuli it was trying to attach itself to, and obviously the awareness of all of this occurring. Read the full article

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Episode 17 - Dissolution Experience and the End of the New Age

The Dissolution of the Experience and Idea of Self-Divinity The Near-Death Experience of punishment explained in episodes one and two of this season can be entirely attributed to drug use. The dissolution experience explained in this episode cannot. If there is an experience that I’ve had that most clearly shows that there is some ground to the many and varied versions of occult, esoteric and new age teachings of how thoughts manifest reality, this is the experience, though not in the I won the lottery type riding into the sunset experience, but in the God sent me to Hell for an instant of time manner as punishment and there weren’t any drugs used to take me there. Be careful what you wish for as taught in several of the ancient myths and be careful what you read and most importantly believe, especially as it pertains to spiritual and invisible things, especially if it has to do with calling yourself divine. I hope by listening to or reading my example of numbskullery that you will avoid such trap doors into the inner pits of hell as I found myself in on this day, long ago. Click link for Transcript. Timestamps: - The immediacy of this experience is what has terrified me (01:25)- How did this experience come about even after meditating and studying spiritual materials? (02:29) - Warning to the student to be wary of teachings that seem just a bit off (03:05) - Primary teaching that led me astray (04:13) - Theory of drug use and the mystical aspects of the Bible (05:57) - Piercing through via drug use is as Jesus states the robbers (07:00) - There are different rules for those that have seen and experienced, even if through drug use, versus the normal believer (08:51) - My attempt at describing what I thought of as self-divinity back when this experience occurred stemming from Jesus saying that we are like the gods (10:29) - Jesus teaches this only after he’s been tempted in the desert (12:35) - Diving deeper with a brief intonation of the Books of Enoch and what it says iss the reason for the Flood (13:25) - Some Old Testament stuff to talk about the belief level in spiritual powers in the ancient world and that they have still been passed on today (15:04) - My understanding of the modern idea of self-divinity and the pervasiveness of humans being called gods among the various traditions (16:20) - Contrasting the various polarities of this idea (18:27) - Describing how these types of teachings and thoughts brought about my downfall (19:26) - The subtle shift and change in my mental ideas mentioned earlier (21:15) - This experience occurred end of winter and beginning of spring much like the other experiences I’ve spoken of (23:19) - The Dissolution Experience begins (25:10) - Comparison to sleep paralysis, but instead, it’s thought paralysis (27:58) - As I fight the experience, a voice of chastisement responds (29:13) - The chastising voice speaks again (31:23) - Timeless and eternal moment of actual hellish punishment (33:16) - This experience dissolved away the idea or notion of self-divinity (36:10) - Explanation of this experience as a removal of the sensation of gravity (36:35) - Religious and scientific concepts merging within my mind (38:08) - Mythological understanding of this experience 13 years later revealed through a synchronous event while commuting to work (38:29)

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Podcast Transcript - S2EP16 - Dreams and Dream Experiences

Podcast Transcript - S2EP16 - Dreams and Dream Experiences

Click link for Podcast Page In this episode we will continue where we left off last time and explore the realm of dreams and their import or non-import spiritually. I know in modern times there are many sects, especially in Christianity, that frown upon dream interpretation, which is rather strange since it was an essential aspect of understanding God in the Old Testament. There is obviously the danger of trying to understand and interpret and then implement a dream depending upon one’s station in life, but the general consensus in the Old Testament is that they were worthwhile to explore. No clearer examples of this are to be found than in the book of Genesis with Joseph interpreting the Pharaoh’s dream of impending drought and in Daniel, where Daniel interprets the Persian king’s dream and gains favor from the king. Interesting that the two books share similar thematic elements. I won’t go into possible interpretations about this, though obviously by saying that I have my own internal theories as to this. Moving forward in time through the Old Testament, I think I mentioned it prior, but when you get to what are called the minor prophets, they exclaim that God has become silent, for there are no more visions and no more dreams as they wail and wail in lamentation for God to return and help His people. Interesting as well that they distinguished between the two: visions and dreams, so clearly, they knew and understood them to be two different spiritual phenomena as well as desiring that the Word of God would come to them in either or. So, I find it strange that there are some circles in Christianity that say that dreams are of no importance and are the work of the Devil, almost as if they don’t want their parishioners having contact with the mystery of God. To be fair though, since I’m remembering I think the stance on dream interpretation is more geared towards not placing your entire spiritual existence on them, let’s do something boring right now: math. If we calculate the number of days over the twenty-year span from my near-death experience in 2001 to this year, 2021, twenty times three hundred sixty-five days would give us seven thousand three hundred days during that span. Since I’m not going to count, and I have journals from these early years that were handwritten and are utterly incomprehensible to me due to how fast I was writing them and I can’t know exactly how many dreams I wrote about during these early years, let’s just say I have detailed notes of a spiritual nature of about one hundred dreams in my database. That equals about 1.3% of all the days during a twenty-year span giving me dreams that I felt were spiritually important enough to jot down. We’re only going to be exploring four maybe five dreams here, or the most important dreams out of those hundred or so dreams, which is like 0.0007% of the number of dreams I’ve had since my near-death Awakening Experience being of a certain level of magnitude and gravitas. So, I can definitely appreciate the Christian voices that say not to put too much trust in one's dreams, just as I can say that building the habit of keeping track of those dreams, even though tiresome and tedious, will every now and then give spectacular dreams of a spiritual nature. Genuine spiritual experience is rather rare, so why not stay open to that possibility occurring a few times over a lifetime through dream journaling and interpretation? Only you dear listener or reader can decide if building that habit of dream journaling is worth the time, alongside following the words of the wise, or the Saints, that teach the importance of discernment, since this is one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit that is incredibly important when it comes to the interpretation of dreams. Unfortunately, I’m unclear on the exact timeline of the three to four dreams we’ll discuss during this time period, and I say three to four since one of these is such a strange experience that I still don’t know if I was dreaming, had a vision of some sort, or had just gone bat-shit crazy for a brief five minutes since I have no idea what the heck this was. I would later have a similar experience that was in fact a dream, after my more recent mystical visions in 2018, along with understanding what this experience and the unclear experience meant at both times, personally and mythologically, since this is one of those experiences I had that revealed the mysteries of the ancient Classical Hellenistic world of mythology to me. Cryptic I know, but you’ll understand further as we move along. The first of these dreams if I remember correctly, I’ve already discussed in a previous podcast episode in Season 1, while briefly mentioning that I think more in terms of pre-existence versus reincarnation. I was inside of a brightly lit room that appeared to me to be a library of sorts since I was seated and reading through some sort of book and the wall next to me had more books. The door opened behind me and an incredibly luminous being was standing at the doorway with things floating to the side off its back which obviously in the dream told me the being was an angel. It had no face so I can’t describe that to you, but the being spoke. He said, “You are needed on Earth,” and nothing more. The primary element I remember was my reaction to what this being had said to me. I wasn’t happy, wasn’t thrilled, wasn’t excited at the prospect, wasn’t heroically ready for the challenge. It was more of an annoyance, more of a setback or more of a grievance that I had been called up since my only verbal reaction to this in the dream was, “Ah crap,” or something to that degree. But I closed the book, got up and walked out into the doorway alongside the being and in the dream, I wasn’t in the shoes of myself, but was seeing myself walk out of the doorway and down what looked like a hallway with the angel in tow. At the time, I felt this dream was giving me a sense of purpose to all that I was reading and studying, that my methods were worthwhile to the world in a way and that I must continue for I existed with a purpose. It wasn’t until later on when I started seeing this in the pre-existent manner since it took time to work my mind around the differences in understanding a spiritual or soul-filled human body and if this existed in eternity with God after death, then the question of did it also exist prior to life on Earth as well naturally arose. In an interesting foreshadow, I would have a similar dream when I finally emerged out of the Desert of the Soul phase and returned back to walking the Narrow Path towards the mysteries once more, which I’ll recount in a later episode. The next dream might get me flamed by Christians, but I know what I dreamt and some of the thoughts I’ve had regarding what I saw in the dream can’t be held back for the sake of existing within any one paradigm of thought or religion for I exist in many paradigms of thought. If you haven’t understood this about me quite yet, hopefully I’m being crystal clear. My eyes opened up inside of the dream and I found myself surrounded by space. But I looked ahead of me and there was another body seated right in front of me, and we were moving. When I turned to the side and looked at what else there was, I could see the planet Earth beneath or to the side of me, however you want to imagine the vantage point, with many, many rings stretching out of the planet, like conveyor belts stretching out and into space and upon each of these ringed belts that moved almost mechanically, were seated innumerable bodies of seated beings. The only thing I’ve ever seen that matches this in popular media, just so you can understand and get a second visual, was in the Matrix, when Neo takes the red pill and wakes up for the first time and looks and sees all the other people in their little embryo sacks and the ringed skyscraper looking buildings with the machines attending to them. The key detail that I noticed in the dream though was that the colors of each of the bodies on these conveyor belts streaming and extending outward from the planet were different. Now just to be clear during this hyper-racial time period, I don’t mean color of skin. It was more their luminosity, their inner light, or if we get esoteric, New Age or Eastern, their aura. But there were only two different colors to these hues. It was either black, or merging into space, or disappearing I suppose, or blue. I say disappearing because those that appeared to lack the blue hue to them and only had a tiny portion of this light within them, I knew intuitively to be in a state of misery. And there were many with this different space color gradation upon their bodies. If you need another visual, I just bought my daughter a Marvel action figure called Genesis-Vel, and his body is like a star body. So, these beings on this conveyor belt looked like this, but without the star light actually upon them, though sort of being reflectors of the lights that surrounded them, and more of a merging into or a dissolving into space. There were other bodies with various gradations of blue with the overwhelming majority of them just a barely visible blue hue, and I remember seeing one body that was intensely blue and was seated fully upright as it sat upon this conveyor belt thing and when I looked at this being, I intuitively knew it experienced no misery as all these other ones did. Another of the details was all those that were without the blue light seemed to be crouched and hunched in their seated position, where the blue-hued bodies appeared to be more upright, especially the brightly lit blue being. Now I could easily lie and tell you what my color was, but I honestly don’t remember checking what color my body was before waking up from the dream. So, where I may get flamed on is from the comment I’m going to make regarding this. I am positive that whoever it was, whenever it began in India since I don’t know the fullness of the history of India or the Hindu religion, but whoever it was that first began artistically depicting the Hindu pantheon of gods in the color blue, probably saw what I saw, or something similar that they would understand in their world view and time period compared to what I saw in my world view and time period. There could’ve been a multitude of other colors on the bodies especially considering this was sort of a vision and definitely a dream, but no, it was either space-like disappearing black, or blue, with only one of the beings on these infinitely numerous belts extending out of the planet, intensely blue. And obviously if you’ve seen any depictions of the Hindu gods, they are all depicted with their skin as the color blue. That’s all I’ll say about that, and you can take it for what it’s worth. I think there’s also some esoteric stuff that says Heaven and the spirit are blue as well. And now that I get to this next dream, I may get flamed for it as well, especially when I give the same type of interpretation of where in the West, I’ve seen this experience depicted as something to be feared, evil, the work of the devil, especially since it arose during the superstitious medieval time period. I mentioned this type of dream experience briefly in a previous episode. I have compared it to the experience of sleep paralysis and can’t find the similarity to it since I’ve had a few actual sleep paralysis dreams, and though elements of that are found in this dream, this dream contains far more to it than just not being able to move. It was actually a lucid dream since I woke up in my bed and could see and realize that I was still sleeping. So, you could also say it was sort of an out of body experience, though after waking up and seeing that I was sleeping, I was almost instantly back in my body, especially because I was pushed back into my body by various unseen other invisible bodies that suddenly had their invisible hands upon me as they pushed me back into my body. I began to thrash my arms and legs as they held me down and even though a gentle voice told me to calm down and that I needed to go through this, I continued to fight. It felt as if something were pressed against the side of my head, on both sides, and then it felt like I was being electrocuted. Having recently at the time watched the horrifying movie Requiem for a Dream, in the dream experience itself I remembered the scene when the old lady gets electro-charged on both sides of her head in the psych ward and instantly attributed whatever I was experiencing in the present lucid dream to what I had seen in the movie. This dream actually messed my sense of reality up for a while since I wondered if I maybe wasn’t in a psych ward somewhere and just didn’t realize it and that the Jonathan that lived and experienced life as he saw it was just the imagination of the real Jonathan that was actually inside of a psych ward and was a crazy person. The electro-charge kept happening on the side of my head and what was weird was I wasn’t just feeling it in the head, but it began to course throughout my body, especially my belly which is where the feeling of immovableness was most pronounced since it felt like Thor’s hammer had been dropped on me and I was unable to move or lift myself up because of it. I don’t remember the experience actually ending, I just suddenly woke up in a hot sweat terrified of what I’d just dreamt. It wouldn’t be until I had the experience two more times in the negative and then once in the positive when I understood this was some other type of the experience of vibration I explained occurs during an actual mystical or spiritual experience, or the lowest form of the sensation of this when one meditates deeply and starts to feel the vibratory pulse on their foreheads between their eyebrows or on other parts of the brain. The next two negative times I had the experience, it felt again as if beings were holding me down, but when I consciously turned it into a positive experience the third time, there were no sensations of beings, and I knew it to be some type of raising of the consciousness within. I know that sounds weird but that’s how I processed these experiences. If we use more esoteric language, these experiences were like the raising of my vibration. As stated prior, I was reading and meditating like crazy during this time period with an actual regimented time frame of making sure I meditated in the morning after I woke up and before going to bed, along with slamming my head with book after book after book. So, my mind was changing. My thoughts were changing, so naturally, I was changing, and I suppose when this occurs to the degree it occurred with me, some type of re-tuning of the spiritual inside occurs, a higher attainment, a higher level of being. If we use other esoteric language, or that of the New Ager or the Eastern religions, we can say that my auras were being cleansed or that my auras were being heightened, or that the flow of energy within my auras or chakras had been enhanced or unlocked or opened up further and maybe these unseen beings were helping and or causing this to occur even though I fought it the first three times this occurred to me. I don’t know, but I’ve given you every concept I’ve come across when trying to understand whatever this experience is. In contrast, when I’ve had just sleep paralysis, there were no feelings of beings around me, there was no vibratory sensations pulsating within my head, no vibratory sensations around my navel that made it feel like I couldn’t move my torso. It was more like I couldn’t move my legs since I was in between sleep and waking and I was telling myself to move my legs or arms and it didn’t seem to be occurring. That’s not at all whatever it is this experience has been the times I’ve had it. Now the superstitious interpretation of this experience. It matches perfectly what has been described as the succubus from medieval lore, coming to take the sleeping person down to hell, especially due to the feeling of another worldly being, or in my case, other worldly beings in the plural being felt in the dream. But the voice I heard wasn’t trying to scare me, it was trying to calm me down and reassure me that whatever this was, needed to occur. It was me that was scared, so I assume the legend of the succubus was created to answer this strange experience in much the same manner, since obviously feeling like invisible beings are holding you down is a terrifying experience to have in that half in, half out, lucid dream. Next, let’s discuss the bizarre experience I have no explanation for and don’t know if it was vision, dream or crazy person in a temporary state of insanity for like five minutes, since I honestly don’t know what this was, though as I’ve said, I have since understood its similarity to one of the myths of antiquity, and have a theory as to what this is using scientific language as well. So, I’m in my apartment, its nighttime, and I get a phone call. I answer it and on the other line is a girl saying what’s up to me by name. I have no clue who she is, and I say, “Hello, do I know you?” And she says, “What do you mean, of course you know me.” I answer, “No, I have no idea who you are. Where do I know you from?” She responds, “I used to be your girlfriend.” Mind you this isn’t the girl I was dating I mentioned during the near-death experience. “When and where were you my girlfriend?” I ask. “When you were living down here in Orange County,” she responds. At this point, I think my heart is exploding out of my chest. Why? Because during the entire ten or so months I lived in Orange County prior to moving out to West LA, I didn’t have a girlfriend. Other than some partying and stuff, I didn’t even have a periodic fling while I was out there, and sure as heck wasn’t on friendship terms with any girl that would’ve had my number or anything deeper than just macking at a party or a club. I was in destruction mode during that time, constant drug and alcohol use and could barely keep a job, barely get my schoolwork done, let alone attempt at a girlfriend. I said in the previous dream that my sense of reality was out of whack for a time and this whatever it was only added to that confusion since in all truth I think this occurred after the being held down vibratory dream I just recounted. I tell her I’m seriously confused because I didn’t have a girlfriend when I was living in Orange County, and I really needed her to tell me her name and how she knew me. She responded, “Look that’s not important. What’s important is your answer to this question: what type of woman are you more interested in being with?” She then gave me two different options, or personality types I suppose. “A woman that will love and honor you but seek only to please you, or a woman that will love and respect you by challenging you to be your best?” I gave her my answer and she said, “Great, that’s all I needed to hear.” I tried to ask her again who she was, and she simply answered that she had to go. I asked if I’d hear from her again, and all she said was maybe. And that was it. Read the full article

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Episode 16 - Dreams and Dream Experiences

The Experience and Interpretation of Dreams The Bible is littered with dreams of a high spiritual nature, dreams interpreted by those with a high spiritual acumen, dreams of portent, dreams to come and dream experiences of a high prophetic or mystical nature. To dream during sleep is human and to seek meaning from an activity we do for one third of our entire life is natural. Not everybody does so anymore in this day and age, but I’ve taken the effort of keep track of my dreams and have found them, every once in a while, to be profoundly spiritual and mystical. Let’s explore some of these dreams I’ve had and hopefully spur you to do the same if you don’t keep a dream journal already.  Click link for Transcript. Timestamps: - Dreams and dream interpretation were worthwhile to explore in the Old Testament (01:31)- Old Testament minor prophets distinguished between dreams and visions as being different spiritual phenomena (02:17) - Mathematical calculation of the number of important dreams I’ve remembered and written on over a 20-year period (02:50) - First of the dreams discussed in this podcast episode, one mentioned prior in a previous episode that has to do with possible pre-existence, or at least why I think more in terms of pre-existence (05:22) - Second dream experience that spoke of the wheel or the chain of souls in this Earth-realm and the auric color of their bodily hues (07:22) - The color of these bodies that I saw reminded me of the color used in the depiction of some of the Egyptian and Hindu deities (10:19) - Third dream experience of either out-of-body or other beings holding me down (11:19) - Understanding this dream to be something attributed to the principle of Vibration found in esoteric works and the raising of one’s consciousness (13:42) - Comparing this dream experience to sleep paralysis (15:30) - Comparing this dream experience to the medieval succubus myth (16:03) - Fourth experience that can’t fully be said to be a dream since I’m not entirely sure what it was (16:39) - The mythological-like question asked by the woman on the phone in this mythological-like dream (18:19) - Fifth dream experience interpretation along with the second of my third stated healings performed, this one specifically a laying on of hands healing (19:55) - Example of a spontaneous healing from a book I’d read during this time (21:00) - Context of physical pain my future wife was dealing with at the time (22:11) - Further details of the laying on of hands to ensure there was no subconscious/subliminal stuff going on (24:13) - My future wife tells of her dream that was occurring as the laying on of hands was taking place without her knowing it (25:29) - Final experience spoken of in this episode and the last time I smoked any marijuana (27:27) - The humorous reason for me coming in contact with the Hermetical works (27:54) - Possible vision seen within and during a thunderstorm out in Las Vegas (29:40) Movie reference aid to this possible vision that was seen years later in a possible experience of synchronicity (31:10)

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Podcast Transcript - S2EP14 - The Conscious Spiritual Journey

Podcast Transcript - S2EP14 - The Conscious Spiritual Journey

If you’re catching the rhythm of this season of the podcast, it’s very sequential. I spent a great deal of time plotting out my database of spiritual journal writing and note taking in a sequential manner with these eventual podcast episodes in mind. I personally find great value in seeing the various steps along the path, the experiences that stimulated or blocked growth, along with the decisions made that furthered me along my spiritual journey. I hope that you find value in this as well, especially as we move along, and you start to see more of the cyclical nature of time alongside the linear method of seeing time that I’m plotting out for you. Many of the things I’m speaking about right now return in the future and were already mentioned in summary in Season 1. Many of the things I began to learn and assimilate into my mind at this early juncture, mature and return in full knowledge in the future. Many of the things I read but did not understand at this point, are revealed in full in the future. So just as I stated in Season 1, that I had a mini-revival ten years ago where the mysteries returned and were attempting to penetrate my mind further, though I was not ready for it at the time, they all returned again cyclically, in almost the same exact patterns and symbols seven to eight years later. The same applies to many of the things I saw and experienced from this early time period that I’ve called the Awakening Experience and the Expansion of the Mind. I obviously can’t run through absolutely every single experience I would now come across, but I will do my best to at least speak about the primary ones. And what I mean by primary ones, are the ones that cyclically returned in the future with greater force of understanding and revelation regarding the depth of the mysteries as they existed in the ancient world when I’ve spoken regarding classical mythology, but also the Christian world after classical mythology. I’ve already given a snippet of it in describing my near-death death experience and that for some reason I slept for three days afterwards and how strange and what does it mean and how does it match the time frame found in the mysteries of Jesus the Christ, but I will work through more of these other mysteries to delve into these philosophical and theological concepts further. But I will still speak about these things in a linear fashion. I’ve already plotted it out in a general timeline since I can’t remember the exact dates for some of them, so the way my mind has typically worked throughout my life is based on my geography. Though I wasn’t a military kid, I was moved around like a military kid, and the way my mind has framed experience A or experience B is based around the years I was living in apartment or house X, or apartment or house Y. So, each of the next several experiences that we’ll dive into all occurred after the near-death death experience end of March, beginning of April 2001, until I left West LA in the summer of 2002. If the near-death experience was the snowball that hit me over the head, what transpired over the next year to year and a half was the avalanche that followed. I was never a competitive kid or person. Or rather, I lost interest in competitive type activities that kids get into because it didn’t seem like my parents cared at all, and so I stopped caring about such things as well. But in the third grade I won a contest for the most books read. I mentioned somewhere that in the third grade I read the Odyssey front to back even though I didn’t understand everything I was reading, but the words entered through my eyes and into my sub and unconscious where they were stored, nonetheless. Once Mary Jane entered into my life in the eighth grade, I would say I lost this part of myself, along with love of learning music, which is weird since most musicians that do drugs gain the music through the drug use, where I stopped caring about and playing the piano when smoking weed entered into my life. But I also said that I’ve never considered myself an addict since I would periodically stop everything I may have been doing at will, instantly, to finish a paper or study for a test so I’d still from time to time go through spurts of reading. Summertime was when this would happen to the greatest magnitude since not having access to buying the drugs or hanging out with friends throughout the day that wanted to steal liquor or smoke weed, my mind would return to itself and this always led to heavy bouts of reading over the summertime for me, when hordes of other kids wanted nothing to do with sticking their noses into a book. If you haven’t noticed yet, even after thirteen episodes, I was and am weird like that. It’s also why I hated school so much. I never felt like myself while in school. It was only during the summertime when I was out of school that I felt like myself once more. Freed now from the influence of hard drugs, freed now from the influence of marijuana, freed now from the influence of alcohol even, my mind needed to find an outlet. And find an outlet it did in reading like a madman, once more. While we’re on the subject still, before moving forward, I said in a previous podcast that playing video games was the lesser of two evils, but that I’ve wondered if maybe it wasn’t considering how long it took to break that habit compared to breaking the bud smoking habit. This is when it took place. If you don’t understand transmutation, or don’t understand in a scientific sense, chaos versus order, or the principle of entropy, at least as it pertains to your own self, to your own being, and not just in an external universal sense, let me touch briefly on that here as it pertains to obsessions or addictions. . . Read the full article

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Episode 14 - The Conscious Spiritual Journey

The Spiritual Journey Begins with an Open and Conscious Mind The royal art as it was called in the ancient world included many different areas of expertise ranging from astrology to memorization of prayers or incantations to the alchemical art of transforming one substance into another. The true transmutation occurs in the conscious mind versus the traditional lead into gold external idea and this episode focuses on this underlying and explicit concept and the actions taken that helped to formulate the new internal spiritual gold as I transitioned from the state of mind and being that I lived and existed in and through prior to the near-death mystical experience, and then by the process of mental transmutation transitioned into the mental state after having the experience that was one of being one in and through a spiritually minded lens and life. Timestamps: - Displaying the strange intermingling of linear and cyclical time through these podcasts and the similar themes that reoccur through the span of my spiritual experiences and lessons (01:24) - The reader in me from youth returns in full force with the mind now freed from the addictions of drugs and alcohol (04:07) - Esoteric principle of transmutation as it pertains to shifting out of an addiction of an unwanted habit, like smoking weed, into a desired one (05:56) - Using modern science and neurological ideas alongside transmutation of thought states (07:25) - The aftermath of the near-death experience and the need to study what the experience meant, in particular the study of God (11:27) - The purchase of the Bible and the incompetence of being Christian and yet not knowing the differences between Catholic and Protestant Christianity and the purchase itself signaling the path that would follow (12:22) - When and where the Gnosticism interest came into play while purchasing my Bible (17:04) - Synchronous event that helped push me towards the study of many religions and spiritual ideas versus a solely Christian one while not having the slightest idea of what Synchronicity actually was (19:24) - Laying the foundation in the mind by reading the Bible even if understanding it wasn’t fully there yet (24:26) - My earliest attempt at reading the Gnostic works and getting lost in the concept of Aeons (25:37) - How reading Dante opened up my mind to the memories of its own existence before being blinded by smoking weed (27:07) - My first conscious meditation triggered in one of Dante’s circles of Hell that brought about an examination of conscience that is compared to the hypothesis of what is potentially seen during a mystical experience (28:40) - An attempt at a theory of what is shown during a mystical experience (31:15) - College course that told me I had to dig deeper to understand the near-death experience since I couldn’t answer how it could point to God without the use of the drug that had been the catalyst for the experience (33:20) Read the full article

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Podcast Transcript - S2EP13 - Remembering the Ignored Signs

Podcast Transcript - S2EP13 - Remembering the Ignored Signs

Just as the previous episode, this is a disclaimer that if you have not listened to the first two episodes of Season two, episodes eleven and twelve, I highly recommend you listen to them before proceeding forward with this episode or this episode will make little sense from a timeline perspective. Let’s get into it. To start, just to further drive home the timeline of the experiences recounted in the previous two episodes, I had school Monday through Thursday. It was on a Thursday when I smoked the speed and either that early Friday or Saturday morning since I can’t remember the exact number of days when I experienced what to me appeared to be near or actual death, I slept finally, and it wasn’t until late Sunday when I awoke and needed to drive back home in West LA since I had school the next day. Everything is somewhat of a blur as you can imagine. All I know is even though my mind felt like it was back in order, since I was back in the crowded campus of Santa Monica College, the same impressions that I explained were occurring while in the nightclub kept creeping up here and there, whenever I put any attention to it. So, I went about my days as cautious as I could, struggling with all my might to keep my thoughts in order, to think only of what I needed to think about and nothing else and not to give any attention to any thoughts I wasn’t consciously thinking. I’m not sure how long it took, whether it was the next weekend, or two weekends after my death experience, but at either interval, it felt as if my mind had grounded itself once more, and regardless of the depth of experience I knew I had witnessed, the dumbass in me crept back in, the dumbass in me that needs to experiment and confirm, probably gained from a lifetime in school of the scientific method ingrained upon my mind. But I wanted to see if I could still smoke weed or not. I knew there was no way in hell I’d ever touch anything stronger than weed. I knew that for a fact then and there. But I’d been smoking weed for a long time already, seven years at that point and even though I never considered myself an addict, still will say that I wasn’t an addict since I’d periodically stop smoking weed and drinking while in high school and college when I knew I needed to get my shit together to get a paper done or pass a test or something, but I still didn’t really want to give it up entirely. Also, the skeptic in me returned. It was just a crazy drug experience, just like in the Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas movie and book, nothing more. There’s not really a God. There’s not really a devil. There’s none of that. It was just drugs. And obviously, the dumbass experimenter that I was and unfortunately am, I told myself, lets test this, by smoking some weed. I know I took one hit, I’m not that sure if I took two hits. Two years later I’d experiment again, and when I recount that, I’m certain it was only one hit. But at this moment, I know it wasn’t more than two, but it may have been, and it may have been one hit. All I know is I sat back into my sofa after the hit, or hits, and simply watched. I looked around my apartment, didn’t see anything pressing in through the walls, no weird voices, nothing. I even remember telling myself, see, smoking weed is fine. And then, all I remember is ever so slightly glancing up towards the ceiling in front of me. And there was the Vision again, the Mindstream ribbons piercing the fabric of space, coming in through the roof of my apartment, no apartment above it actually, and I was actually looking out into the night sky with the swirling vortex of the Vision right in front of me again. When I glanced at it, it began to perform the same actions as the ball of light I’d seen in the death experience, trying to suck me into looking at it and the extension of thoughts over eternal time in the present moment of now started, and time began to slow. A four letter bad word starting with the letter F, is all I thought. It didn’t last long though. Didn’t draw me in to gazing at it with the same gravitational pull as what occurred in the life review death experience, but I knew without a doubt that whatever this was that I was seeing was just as real a part of reality as anything else, and that smoking weed and doing drugs opened one up to it, or at least, since I’d already been opened up to it via this route, it was now always going to occur. By this point I was also thinking further of the experience having to do with judgment or having judgment passed upon oneself when one sees it, and essentially, I saw it in the negative sense and would only see it in the negative sense, especially if experienced through drug use, for quite some time afterwards, until my more recent mystical experiences. I don’t remember what occurred after. The Vision just sort of went away. Or by looking away and telling myself I can’t do that again and acknowledging that this spinning vortex looking thing of eternal thought was real and that it had something to do with God and Judgment, I think I fell asleep. Only reason I say that is because I know it was daylight when I threw out my bongs, pipes, papers and the last sack of weed I ever possessed. Though I’ve drank liquor since then of course, at the time, I also poured out all the liquor that I had in my apartment, and I think I went close to a year without even drinking a drop of anything but church wine. . . Read the full article

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Podcast Episode 13 - Remembering the Ignored Signs

Seeds and Signs of the Mysteries of Heaven and Hell The skeptic mind is a powerful one. Give me facts and make sure they are only based upon the scientific paradigm of rules I want to follow and trust in, or I will label whatever you give me as false and untrue. I came across many things leading up to what was described in the Descent into Hell and Near-Death Experience episodes.  I thought about these experiences as strange and weird but utter nonsense even as the evidence was staring me in the face. Why? I answer this in the podcast, but it was because if I truly did believe in God, which is what these experiences were pointing towards, then it would mean needing to change the life that I was living. And who truly wishes to do that, especially at age 19?Timestamps: - Back in reality land I struggle to keep the mind together after both the effect of the drug and what was seen or experienced as hell and death (01:45) - The skeptic in me returns and the experience begins to be questioned (03:13) - The idea of Judgment to this experience finally enters into my mind (05:15) - The root of my skepticism was not wanting to change (06:08) - Disclaimer to turn back if one does not wish to open this door further (07:09) - The first acid experience remembered along with the signs and symbols that were engraved upon my mind (07:19) - The worst thing possible to be exposed to perhaps during drug use is talk about the Devil and this is what began to be presented and spoken of to me by a former Satanist or Devil Worshiper (10:09) - Dream that occurred as a result of this lecture on the Devil (14:02) - The second acid experience remembered along with what was seen (15:57) - If there were more guidance during a psychedelic drug experience would more people experience mystical type things (16:57) - Century Club acid experience (17:39) - Crossing the barrier and leaving the mortal world (19:34) - Another Hellish type experience follows after another time skip as well (21:03) - Thinking that something was trying to speak or get my attention from this experience and slamming it away with skepticism (23:24) - Understanding that if I chose to believe in God for real, it would mean life changes and responsibility (24:55) - Third experience in this podcast; speaks of some sort of evil presence or feeling from within (25:29) - Drugs are the easy route to experiencing the Mysteries and it was my reflections on the drug use that had me continue to search for the answers to my skepticism (29:19) Read the full article

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Podcast Transcript - S2EP12 - The Death Experience

Podcast Transcript - S2EP12 - The Death Experience

If you have not listened to the first episode of this season, episode number 11, please do so before proceeding forward as this episode will not make much sense if you haven’t listened to the previous one. Let’s get right into it. Time skipped again after that phone call. I don’t remember anything else occurring in the parking lot outside of that nightclub, I don’t remember driving, nothing. I was just suddenly in an apartment, on the couch freaking out over what I’d witnessed in that nightclub. Because of the time skipping, I’m not entirely sure on how much time had passed sitting there in this apartment, on this couch, trying to process what I’d seen and experienced. I remember seeing the daylight, but then I could just be imagining it. The point I’m making is I’ve thought that the entire contents of this experience, both the previous episode and what I will relate in this one, could’ve happened entirely in a single night, but also could’ve taken place over the course of two nights. I’m not entirely sure due to the time skipping experience. All I know is I was plastered to this couch, immovable, sweating, trying to organize my mind and thoughts, being incapable of it due to the drug effects coupled with the realization of having seen Hell on Earth, and that it seemed like I saw daylight, but then it was also as if it was nighttime again, and people kept coming and going from this apartment I was in. I will try to relate what I felt at this point since it’s very strange, is coming through a fog of memory and gets mythological even. Even though I fully knew and was taking responsibility for having smoked the drug at an internal level, that those around me knew that this would happen if I did it, was paramount in my mind. But since I’d seen those strange internal presences within all those in the nightclub, including the people I was with, I couldn’t make out if the people I was with were actually conscious of this, or if it had been these inner presences within them that had taken part in influencing me with or through these people around me, towards smoking the speed. Let me word it directly. All those that I’d been with, including each of these coming and going persons into this apartment seemed to be benefiting from the experience I was having in some very strange otherworldly manner. It was as if they had gained something, were gaining something from it, from my suffering, and that it was as if they had offered me, or sacrificed me to this hellish realm, is another way I was thinking and seeing at this point. I know that sounds super strange, but that’s what it felt like. And it angered me. It angered me that I’d trusted these so-called friends, angered me that I’d chosen to hang around with them, angered me that I’d chosen to join in and smoke that drug. But though I could recognize the anger and frustration, since my mind was still all out of whack, it was as if I was chained to that couch, immovable and incapable of leaving, incapable of escaping the experience, essentially. Obviously my sense of time was distorted since I can’t place if there was or wasn’t daylight or if it was all one night, but eventually I found myself alone in the dark, still seated on the couch in deep night. There were no more coming and going of people in and out of that apartment, the lights were off and I was alone with my heart pounding out of my chest. I turned the television on since I was hoping it would take my mind off of what I’d experienced at the nightclub. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I’ll give you the movie and television imagery that sort of speaks of what I experienced next, and honestly may have merged with the drug experience or something to that degree and created what I saw from the depths of my subconscious. There’s an old horror movie staring the late John Ritter called “Stay Tuned,” that I’d watched as a child. I don’t remember the details of it, I only remember that it’s either he gets sucked into television world, or television world gets sucked out and into his reality. The television reference would be one of the old Simpson’s Halloween specials when Bart and Lisa get sucked into the television and are in the Itchy and Scratchy show. That gives you a hint at what I next witnessed. . . Read the full article

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Podcast Episode 12 - The Death Experience

NDE: Near-Death Experience An NDE or near-death experience is somewhat of an interesting definition considering many that have the experience say it is life-changing, me included. Being so near to death brings life or rebirth or renewal. It is a fact within nature all around and within us. I cannot say this experience was a pure mystical experience for it was drug induced, though not intentionally. The psychedelic quality of the experience existed and/or was the medium to the Visionary experience yet considering the death aspect I’ve never been fully convinced it was solely psychedelic drug mysticism of some sort, again, especially because I had zero intention or motivation or training for such an experience. Either way, I saw what I saw and will detail what was seen and how it was seen and much as I stated in the first episode, hopefully by providing such details the listener or reader will know that this experience was not made up in the creative sense but witnessed or endured as the ordeal found in the ancient mysteries. Timestamps: - Time-skipping effects or feelings due to drugs explained a bit more (01:12) - The memory of my mind trying to process the hellish experience (02:24) - Attempt at describing the feeling of having been sacrificed to this infernal realm and being incapable of moving (03:02) - Television horror comes to life (04:37) - The moon transformed into the Skull of Death amidst the red sky (06:42) - When I knew and saw that Death was upon me (09:56) - My own thoughts create the experience of physical pain that leads towards death (11:08) - The first experience of feeling and hearing the esoteric teaching of Vibration (11:19) - Transitioning through a cloudy fog and then finding myself in space (12:58) - The Vision appears (13:36) - Description of what the Vision looked like (14:13) - The life review within the spinning rings of the Vision begins (14:33) - Being incapable of looking away from the Orb of Judgment (16:33) - Acceptance of this experience as being Death and Judgment and looking within the life review to see what it wanted to show me (16:47) - The childhood memories the spinning planet Saturn Vision showed me (17:35) - A pause in the life-review as acceptance and awareness seeps in (22:03) - The observer from the seat of the Self distinguishing itself from the mind and idea of self (23:36) - The Demiurge identified within (24:37) - Prayer of Repentance and the Light Shines forth (25:36) - Awakening in the land of the living once more (27:37) - The Mindstream tears through fabric of space to merge the internal and external experiences of the father (28:26) - Exiting and walking through the cold of the deepest circle of Hell (30:29) - The primary reason for spending so much time studying the mystical experiences and the mysteries before speaking about them (32:12) Read the full article

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Podcast Transcript - S2EP11 - Descent into Hell

Podcast Transcript - S2EP11 - The Descent into Hell

After a general overview of the mysteries, highlights of the various mystical experiences that I have experienced, or undergone, however you wish to view it, a detailed description of my mystical ascension experience in the first episode, followed by a summary examination of that experience through the lens of knowledge gained from the history books of those that have experienced and expressed similarly the movements that occur, it’s time to delve back into the past. Way in the past. Exactly 20 years ago to be precise, which is an interesting interval and again a reflection of both linear and cyclical time as we human beings experience time, as the ongoing flow that changes since it moves forward, yet also remains the same since it repeats itself always.  If you have had a chance to visit my website at logosofexperienceandtruth.com, perhaps you have already delved deeper into the mysteries. If you haven’t, make sure to visit and become a member since I break down the image of that which is seen during the mystical experience across the pages of human history specific to each of the various cultural and religious groups across time. What I left out in Season 1 of the podcast and within the contents of the member content found in the Vision Explained Deeper will be spoken of more clearly in these ten episodes for Season 2. Due to the nature of the contents found in this season it will be heavy on the non-fiction auto-biographical sort but will also expand into the questions and answers about the various phenomena of spiritual experience I’ve spoken of. As I stated in the first season of episodes, though I thoroughly enjoy reading the philosophical and theological and spiritual stuff, without the actual experiences of the various personages I’ve read it’s felt like much was being left out if it had actually occurred to them or the writers were simply rehashing things they’d learned but hadn’t actually experienced themselves. I was recently combing through You Tube and reading through what others have spoken of regarding subconscious re-programming and such things as that, and over and over again nobody seems to speak about any type of mystical experience, images seen, visions had, etc. I won’t name these speakers since I’m not bashing their work, there’s some very good speakers out there and perhaps they haven’t had actual mystical experience and are simply experts in the philosophy that is extracted from such experience, but I do find it very curious that such experiences as I will relate are not spoken of very often by others. Or I suppose I’ve just seen and experienced and comprehended some pretty wild stuff. This is why I started this podcast with my most recent mystical experience and then unpacked much of the underlying mystical philosophical underpinnings of that experience and this season of the podcast will continue down that path but with much more detail of the personal sort. Some of what I will recount will obviously sound made-up. Hopefully the discerning listener of this podcast or reader of this ebook will be able to pick up the type of details that will render it impossible to have been made-up. Fantastical, drug-induced and hallucinatory perhaps, but definitely not made up in the creative sense. As spoken of in another episode, I’m sure there’s something to be said in trying to give a disclaimer at the forefront saying that I’m not lying in what I will retell as a way of priming your mind towards a laundry list of lies, but hopefully by now, you know I ain’t lying. Telling the truth is far more interesting to me regarding these mysteries than lying or making it up. And if you still believe I’m just crazy or was solely under the influence of drugs then at least you’re getting some of the visual content that such experiences may bring if that’s all you come to believe may have been occurring in my mind. So let’s get into it. There was an experience I had in 2001. I have mentioned it, spoken of it in various episodes of the podcast and member content when it made sense regarding it, summarized it through one of my characters in my book Lucifer Revealed, but I have yet to tell the entire tale of that which occurred and was seen and experienced. As before, I will do my best not to provide interpretation of what was experienced and seen during the time of the experience unless it was seen and interpreted and understood during the experience itself. I will instead tell the tale to the best of my abilities and will then unpack it along with everything that I could reflect upon and see that led up to the mystical experience followed with all that came afterwards. So, I won’t provide too much context to what led up to this experience other than what I feel is necessary so that you understand to a degree what I may have immediately understood during the experience and at the very least, understood very quickly afterwards. Also, just as a disclaimer, this story will get deeper into my previous life’s drug use along with graphic depictions of the possibly supernatural scary sort. You have been advised. I was 19 at the time. There is that obvious comment to be made that through the course of time and aging and the gaining of knowledge, experience and wisdom, we all grow. We change. We either devolve into something more bestial or rise higher as human beings and then further rise into spiritual beings. It’s the flow of life whether we know it or not. To put it as bluntly as I can: who I was prior to this experience is both who I am now but then is also not who I am now. Obviously if I look in the mirror, I know I’m still the same person in a way, but then when I look in my mind I’m definitely not the same person, even if the memories of the past arise or even as I draft this podcast and have to conjure up the memories from a time long ago that no longer exists other than in my mind, I am not the same person that experienced this experience. . . Read the full article

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Episode 11 - The Descent into Hell

Descent into the Eternal Hell that Exists Now Is Hell a place one goes to after death or is it something here, now, all around us? This was a question I’d never once asked myself truly until I dabbled with a new drug that uncorked my mind into a hellscape of subliminal desecration. Whether a physical place or not in some afterlife matters not for it most definitely exists within the mind and the experience of and within the mind. This was the experience that opened my eyes to the dangers of mental manipulation and subliminal conditioning. I’d had a sense of such things over the course of the previous year and half but I’d fought to ignore the premonitions and sights I’d seen leading up to this Descent into the Hell of the mind. This was the experience that unveiled the Mysteries of mysticism. Probably at too young an age but it is what it is. “Abandon every hope, all you who enter,” said the poet Dante upon entering into Hell in The Divine Comedy. The path is long and hard to exit such a state of mind as I fell into but it is possible. Journey with me and I will show you the steps I was led upon and perhaps it can help you to decipher the signs all around you as well. Timestamps: - Quick overview of Season 1 and what to expect in Season 2 (00:58) - Start of the Descent into Hell episode and reflection on the mystical experience (04:58) - Attempt at grounding the mystical experience that occurred over twenty years ago more precisely (08:02) - Recalling the precursor night of heavy marijuana use a week before the Near-Death Experience (09:21) - Video games and The Doors and the mind visualizing pain (11:22) - First time thoughts of Death entered into my mind (12:43) - Theorizing if this precursor night of contemplating death may have attracted the Near-Death Experience a week later in a Law of Attraction type of manner (14:29) - The Descent into Hell via a new drug used (15:23) - Witnessing the subliminal effects of influence as it occurs within the mind (16:39) - The experience of the subliminal effects of external influences given by a few examples (17:54) - Entering into the Nightclub of Hell (22:20) - The Dead are Living and the Living are Dead (23:59) - “You ain’t gotta be in jail to be doing time,” (25:24) - Comparing what I saw to what has been seen in other psychedelic experiences (27:00) - Sexuality temporarily tossed into disarray from the temporary reading of minds (27:45) - The Eternal Hell that exists Now (30:36) Time skipping to receiving a call outside of the nightclub (32:24) - Theory of what is potentially seen in these types of horror hell experiences (33:49) Read the full article

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Logos of Experience and Truth Podcast Transcript: Season One Summary

Transcript: Season One Podcast Summary

00:00:10,690 --> 00:00:36,140 Hello and welcome. This will be a 10-episode summary of Season 1 of the Logos of Experience and Truth Podcast. I will provide each episode's key points with a timestamp so you can navigate these lengthy recordings. For further navigation and timestamps, click the link in the episode description to go to the podcast page where I provide a detailed 00:00:36,150 --> 00:01:02,730 timestamped outline in the show notes. If you haven't listened to the Season 1 trailer for why these show notes and this summary episode may be important, please do so. Let us begin. Episode one. First part is an intro to religious, spiritual, visionary experiences with a quick example and reading from a poem by Saint John of the Cross. Second part goes into the reason, purpose and 00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:37,090 question I sought to ask, answer and prove. With stories, myths and scriptures of God found across the face of the Earth, there must be a way to show this in some way, and if so, what is that way? The major goal I have is to prove God. The minor and more realistic one is to prove the experience that has led to belief in God. The mystical experience of the Beatific Vision. Third part is retelling the mystical visionary spiritual experience of ascending to the Temple of the Father 00:01:37,340 --> 00:02:01,960 and the key knowledge learned that led to this. I talk about the Ascension experience at 28 minutes 11 seconds, but it includes the entire day and everything that led to the religious spiritual vision later at night. If you just want the knowledge learned and the vision witnessed, jump to 41 minutes 41 seconds. Episode 2. This episode continues after the first chronologically and deals with astronomical and/or 00:02:01,970 --> 00:02:35,890 astrological phenomenon seen in the sky at 3:00 AM after the Ascension visionary experience. I discuss my stance on such things in the process of retelling what I saw in the sky. This is followed with dreams and dream Interpretation and how they relate to the previous day. Episode 3. First part of this episode contains lots of third-party material that I read. I read what the Catechism of the Catholic Church has to say on the Beatific Vision since they're the ones that coined the term. 00:02:35,900 --> 00:03:07,230 The second part contains a brief summary of the phases of a mystic as I paraphrase the various experiences I'll talk about and reference throughout this podcast. If you just want to jump to my overview of the personal experiences I've witnessed, jump to 19 minutes and 24 seconds. Episode 4. I'll be honest and when you listen, you'll agree. I was nervous talking in the first three episodes even though I was basically reading a script. 00:03:07,940 --> 00:03:45,260 This episode is when I found my happy place in talking about the mysteries. I explain how the mystic sees the world, how it compares with what neurology has and is showing and work through differentiating the known and unknown, especially the True Self versus the false self. Episode 5. First part is describing a synchronistic event that occurred between the recording of episode four and five. Carl Jung described synchronicity as meaningful events that occur in life that don't appear random but ordered or meant to occur or fated, etc. That is probably a terrible 00:03:45,270 --> 00:04:16,050 summary, but I go deep into the details of what I observed. The second part talks a bit about my history with science, the experience of vibration, where this term comes from in the occult work, "The Kybalion," a bit about the mystical and historical Hermes and a bit about my questioning the traditions of the Old Testament Bible versus scholarly work on it and a bit of Akhenaten, the Heretic Pharaoh of Egypt. The third part has me ramble topic to topic and I wind up reading some Bible stuff and interpreting them from the lens of a mystic. 00:04:16,740 --> 00:04:45,070 Part four is very serious mystical stuff in describing the Logos, the Word, the Christ, and how Christ is Christ in the grand scheme of the Trinity and Christian theology. I've never been satisfied with the explanations of the Trinity I've heard. I'm honest about still being somewhat baffled by the Holy Spirit, but I hit a home run in describing the relationship between Father and Son and how this very clearly reveals the precision of the words in the Nicene Creed. If you want to jump straight to that, advance token to GO at 30 minutes and 46 seconds. 00:04:50,600 --> 00:05:28,360 Leave a comment and discuss whether this description of the Logos within the Trinity was awesome or if it sucked royally. Episode 6. I start where the previous episode ended speaking about gender. Not physical gender, but the gender of the mind. Very mystical stuff I explain deeply in my work: "The Vision Explained Deeper" that you can purchase at logosofexperienceandtruth.com. The specific sections are the ones on the labyrinth and on nature. Part two has me wander into the Catholicism versus Protestant argument. Part three gets into what meditating 00:05:29,290 --> 00:05:58,810 gets you, followed by interesting words you can jump to at 7 minutes that begins discussing the True self and the will of God. Part four wanders through different topics in the previous episodes, like speaking more on eternity and such. Part five. This is when I get on topic with discussing the Image of God as described in Genesis. It does have to do with the first part of the episode when speaking about the gender of the mind, so you may want to listen to the entire episode to fully understand the Image of God. 00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:48,530 Part six I do a guided meditation on the uniqueness of you, the listener, having been made in the Image of God. Jump to minute 20 for this one. Episode 7. Many things spoken of here. If you're catching my drift, I was concerned with recording and saying as much as possible as if these were the only ten episodes I was ever going to record. I discuss the self, more in depth after having identified what the self would most likely be In Episode 6. I speak on the Buddhist concept of Anatma, compare that to the Gnostic ideas and then get much more into the process of self-purgation or the Dark Night of the Soul, or what I like calling the Desert of the Soul as the process of analyzing the self against what is not self. This episode also begins a deeper process of reflecting on the 00:06:55,770 --> 00:07:29,970 image that denotes the mystical experience and vision and why I try to focus more on this common ground versus the differences between religious faiths and ideas. This is important since at least you as a listener will understand the reasons for my stance on this especially if you find yourself on the other side of the table. Especially for my Christian brothers and sisters that say Christ or nothing. If you listen to the overall trailer for the Logos of Experience and Truth Podcast, you will have heard me say I always return everything back to Christ. 00:07:29,970 --> 00:08:08,480 There is reason for this. It has to do with understanding the eternal Christ, Word, Logos, not just Jesus. Again, you can purchase "The Vision Explained Deeper" on the logosofexperienceandtruth.com for my in-depth analysis of this common image and decide for yourself and at least be at peace with my having given my reasons for this stance, even if we remain at opposite ends. I finish with an expose on understanding self through meditating on what one would die for and relate that to the apostles and the belief in Christ being raised. 00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:48,130 Episode 8. Part one is a rant on real versus not real and the power of belief and the stigmatic experiences that the Saints have had. Part 2 speaks about my search for the Mysteries through being a married person versus some type of religious person and further inquiries into the nature of gender in the mind. Part three speaks on paradox and the mystery of the micro and macrocosm and starts at 10 minutes and 18 seconds. Part four speaks on maya, or the illusion of reality the senses create and I compare this with the scientific experiments of why light is a wave or a particle. 00:08:48,140 --> 00:09:15,990 I wrote a post addressing this since I was still contemplating it after the recording. Part five is a humorous story about Jesus's face found on toast. Part six is a rare political rant since this episode was recorded on November 6th, 2020. It doesn't get into politics as you might be expecting, but instead the nature of subliminal messaging, mind control, media manipulation, et cetera. The Golden Shower ticket starts at 23 minutes 55 seconds. 00:09:18,470 --> 00:09:51,610 Part seven gets to the topic of fact or fiction in the gospel narratives, using the mystical understandings of seeing what we see. Jump to minute 36 and 22 seconds to get into the meat and potatoes of this episode that gives a secret on how to read the gospel texts and how to ask yourself the questions Christ continuously asks the Apostles in the text and what asking these questions does and reveals to us, the listener or reader of the text if we ask them of ourselves. 00:09:52,420 --> 00:10:33,100 Episode 9. First part is me rambling about many of the various topics already discussed but in new ways and with new examples. I also get into creative thought or manifestation or law of attraction and how it relates to synchronicity with a few more examples that occurred in the process of recording the episode. Second part is where I start reimagining Pascal's Wager by exchanging belief in God and Punishment or reward at death with belief in the Self. This is obviously using the summaries of Episodes 4 through 8 to reach this point, so listen to those episodes before 00:10:33,110 --> 00:11:08,780 listening to this one. The talk on Pascal's Wager starts at 17 minutes and 31 seconds. Episode 10, Terrible title is all I'll say, though I do eventually speak about the seed falling on good soil and interpret that parable mystically. First part, I ramble about some stuff and then start talking about a conversation with the wife about the True Self and the great difficulty of finding it in today's world. Second part compares this exact difficulty with the gospel story that contrasts Mary and Martha. I then go in depth with understanding myself when the comparison 00:11:08,850 --> 00:11:41,810 of whether I'm more like Mary or Martha is made. Third part I return to rambling about Many different things too numerous to enumerate, like how randomness has to be purposefully inserted into reality, if not all would be random, including the sentence, words and sounds I am making right now, et cetera. I hope this summary and the timestamps given for key sections within several of the episodes helps you to navigate through my recorded mind. For even more details and timestamps if those mentioned 00:11:41,820 --> 00:12:06,360 in this episode are not enough, please click the link in the episode description and listen with the timestamped show notes available to skip around when I start ranting. Hit SUBSCRIBE so you can get notified when the 50 new Episodes I've recorded are released. And yes, I am working towards releasing these on a scheduled basis. And I will leave you with this. Until next time. Read the full article