#Ciaphas Caine

[championsandheroes]

I'm actually making some progress on the Ciaphas Cain books and there's just something awkward about reading his memoirs as edited by his girlfriend, when he's very much a kiss and tell sort of a guy with a girl in every harbor/ship/planet/moon until he meets Amberley. Exactly how many explicit details has inquisitor Amberley removed? We will never know (until a particularly suicidal clerk dig through the original documents).

Points for correctly guessing which of the descriptions were how he actually described colonel Kasteen's butt.

Over at Patreon and society6 there are butts, rears, buttocks, and even the occasional cake.

[the-random-hamlet]

Not Mine. Thought to Share.

[commissar-yarrick]

the boiz being boiz

[blazingcakes]

scribbling...

what did he say to gramps?

[beethereal-knight]

The very hero of the Imperium, doin' his best

[zoshbox]

I’m going to make everyone look at my bad takes.

[frogblast-the-ventcore]

[cursed-40k-thoughts]

Who is the biggest Chad in Warhammer 40k?

Jurgen was an unwashed porn addict who was also a null and had the two jobs of making tea and carrying a giant blowtorch around for the express purpose of incinerating things at his own discretion. He never elaborated on anything in his life and died of old age. That motherfucker won 40k, as far as that setting goes. Absolute gigachad behaviour the entire time.

[shampoopheasant]

X上的1000粉点图

[madame-helen]

[thethronezone]

Service top Ciaphas Cain. Not because he's an experienced lover but because he's so nervous he'll disappoint you that he gives it all he got. He's got such performance anxiety he can barely get it up meanwhile you're having the most mindblowing sex of your life.

[stainlesssteellocust]

Concept: What if Sulla’s dull and purple-prosed memoirs are actually just as bullshit at Cain’s official propaganda, and she’s just like him fr fr.

She (wrongly) believes that a Hero of the Imperium has the utmost faith in her and can’t bear the consequences of failure should she not live up to his high expectations (which he doesn’t have) and masks it behind her eager soldier persona so hard that even Cain doesn’t see it. And then when she becomes famous a whole generation of Militarum girls read Valhallan Valkyrie at a formative age and start thinking they need to live up to her. Just an endlessly recursive loop of imposter syndrome.

Like what if in For the Emperor when she leads her command squad in a risky flanking attack and nobody is quite sure afterwards whether she was being brave or stupid and she hyped the whole thing up in her memoirs, what she actually wrote in her private diary was:

Obviously the last thing I wanted to do was leave my nice safe command vehicle, which could shield me from the heretic lasbolts until His Majesty got down from the throne, and head out into the open where they could cut me to bits. But the only reason I had a command vehicle at all was because all the real officers had been torn to bits by Tyranids and I’d been shoved into a position I didn’t deserve. It had been made clear that our commanders were counting on me, and if I showed myself to be unworthy I could expect to be back on the frontlines within a week, if not in a penal legion.

Worse, an honest-to-the-Emperor hero had put his trust in me. How a man such as Ciaphas Cain didn’t see at once through my ridiculous persona I will never know - but if Cain had one weakness, and as a woman who had the honour to fight along side him for many years, I think I know better than most his hidden heart - it is that he was perhaps overly trusting of the men and women in his command. Such a noble warrior could not imagine that a regiment such as ours could hide a coward as craven as myself, and if there was anything other than the Emperor’s own grace that forced me out the entrance ramp that day, it was the need not to bring our company shame in his eyes.

Besides, if I didn’t live up to that utterly undeserved faith there’d be no more commands for Jenit Sulla, and I’d probably dead within the year. The only way to keep myself out in danger going forward was, ironically, leaping feet-first into it today. And so, cursing myself every step of the way, I fixed the old “Valkyrie Warrior” expression back onto my face, stepped out of my Chimera, and gave the order to advance.

[commissar-yarrick]

[ppkukel]

A couple of sketches with a new pen I've been sketching since I was bored at my part-time job. The Cain`s portrait is made with a fountain pen, but the rest is made with a gel pen

[wh40kartwork]

Commissar Cain

by Jan Drenovec

[xixneo]

ciaphas cain is so boyfailure radiohead-core