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daughterofhecata · 11 months ago

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Reading List 2023

Ocean Vuong: Night Sky With Exit Wounds

Alena Mornštajnová: Hana

Wolfgang Benz: Theresienstadt. Ein Geschichte von Täuschung und Vernichtung.

Jáchym Topol: Die Teufelswerkstatt [org. title: Chladnou zemí]

Ocean Vuong: Time is a Mother

Richard Siken: Crush

Ben Nevis: Die Drei ??? Die Yacht des Verrats

Frank Wedekind: Frühlings Erwachen (reread)

James Ellroy: Die Schwarze Dahlie [org. title: The Black Dahlia]

André Marx: Die Drei ??? und der Puppenmacher

Evelyn Boyd: Rocky Beach Crimes #2. Mord unter Palmen.

Peter Hallama: Nationale Helden und jüdische Opfer. Tschechische Repräsentationen des Holocaust.

Brigitte Johanna Henkel-Waidhofer: Die Drei ??? Späte Rache

Kim Newman: Professor Moriarty. The Hound of the D‘Urbervilles. (reread)

Vera Schiff: The Theresienstadt Deception. The Concentration Camp the Nazis Created to Deceive the World.

Evelyn Boyd: Rocky Beach Crimes #2. Mord unter Palmen. (reread)

Josef Bor: Die verlassene Puppe [org. title: Opuštěná panenka]

Kari Erlhoff: Rocky Beach Crimes #1. Tödliche Törtchen.

Susanna Partsch: Wer klaute die Mona Lisa? Die berühmtesten Kunstdiebstähle der Welt.

Kathy Reichs: Virals #1. Tote können nicht mehr reden. [org. title: Virals] (reread)

Arthur Schnitzler: Reigen (reread)

Evelyn Boyd: Die Drei ??? Teuflisches Foul

Faye Kellerman: Der Zorn sei dein Ende [org. title: The Hunt]

J.D. Salinger: The Catcher in the Rye

Władysław Szlengel: Was ich den Toten las [org. title: Co czytałem umarłym]

Hanna Krall: Dem Herrgott Zuvorkommen [org. title: Zdążyć przed Panem Bogiem]

Ursula K. Le Guin: The Dispossessed

Thomas Mann: Der Tod in Venedig

James Oswald: Natural Causes. An Inspector McLean Novel.

Sylvia Plath: The Bell Jar (reread)

Christoph Dittert: Die Drei ??? Melodie der Rache

Maria Rolnikaitė: Mein Tagebuch [org. title: Ja dolžna rasskazat']

Mark Thompson: Leatherfolk. Radical Sex, People, Politics and Practice.

James Baldwin: Giovanni‘s Room

Christopher Tauber, Hanna Wenzel: Rocky Beach. Eine Interpretation.

Lorraine Vivian Hansberry: A Raisin in the Sun

Jonathan Kellerman: Unnatural History. An Alex Delaware Novel.

Robert Arthur: Die Drei ??? und die Geisterinsel. [org. title: The Three Investigators in the Secret of Skeleton Island]

Evelyn Boyd: Rocky Beach Crimes #3. Eiskalter Rausch.

André Marx: Die Drei ??? Labyrinth der Götter

John Barth: Lost in the Funhouse

Langston Hughes: Selected Poems of Langston Hughes.

Claude McKay: Harlem Shadows. The Poems of Claude McKay.

Jonathan Kellerman: Exit. Ein Alex Delaware Roman. [org. title: Devil‘s Waltz. An Alex Delaware Novel.] (reread)

David Henry Hwang: M Butterfly

James Oswald: The Book of Souls. An Inspector McLean Novel.

Jonathan Kellerman: Time Bomb. An Alex Delaware Novel. (reread)

Manuela Günter: Überleben schreiben. Zur Autobiographik der Shoah.

Birgit Kröhle: Geschichte und Geschichten. Die literarische Verarbeitung von Auschwitz-Erlebnissen.

Alexander F. Spreng: Der Fluch (reread)

Sibylle Schmidt: Zeugenschaft. Ethische und politische Dimensionen.

Sibylle Schmidt: Ethik und Episteme der Zeugenschaft

Kari Erlhoff & Christoph Dittert: Die Drei ??? und die Salztote

Jeanette McCurdy: I‘m Glad My Mom Died

E.T.A. Hoffmann: Der Sandmann

Hendrik Buchna: Die Drei ??? Drehbuch der Täuschung

Michael Scott: The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel #2. The Magician. (reread)

Alain Locke: The New Negro

Mascha Kaléko: Großstadtliebe. Lyrische Stenogramme.

Marco Sonnleitner: Die Drei ??? Der Tag der Toten

Georg Heym: Gedichte [herausgegeben von Stephan Hermlin]

Rose Ausländer: Hinter allen Worten. Gedichte. [herausgegeben von Helmut Braun]

Vladimir Nabokov: Lolita

Paul Celan: Ausgewählte Gedichte. Zwei Reden. [herausgegeben von Günther Busch]

Rich Cohen: Lake Shore Drive [org. title: Lake Effect]

Jan T. Gross: Neighbors. The Destruction of the Jewish Community in Jedwabne, Poland.

Kathy Reichs: Virals #2. Nur die Tote kennt die Wahrheit. [org. title: Seizure]

Jonathan Kellerman: Bones. An Alex Delaware Novel. (reread)

Akwaeke Emezi: You made a Fool of Death with your Beauty

Friedrich Schiller: Maria Stuart

Bret Easton Ellis: American Psycho

Christian Handel: Die Hexenwald-Chroniken #2. Palast aus Gold und Tränen.

Maurice Leblanc: Arsène Lupin und der Schatz der Könige von Frankreich [org. title: L'Aiguille creuse]

E.T.A. Hoffmann: Nussknacker und Mausekönig

Marco Sonnleitner: Die Drei ??? Panik im Park

Ben Nevis: Die Drei ??? Tal des Schreckens

Michael Borlik: Ihr mich auch

Robert Arthur: Die Drei ??? und der grüne Geist [org. title: Alfred Hitchcock and the Three Investigators in the Mystery of the Green Ghost]

Barbara Köhler: Niemands Frau. Gesänge.

Christoph Dittert: Die Drei ??? Hotel der Diebe

Cornelia Funke: Tintenwelt #4. Die Farbe der Rache.

DNF:

Thomas Ziebula: Paul Stainer #1. Der rote Judas.

Faye Kellerman: Mord im Garten Eden [org. title: The Garden of Eden and Other Criminal Delights]

#end of 2023 #reading list #bookblr #readblr #to my utter surprise i just breezed through some books in december and did end up reaching my goal of 80 books #read books that were originally published in: german - english - czech - polish - lithuthian (i think) - french #read more poetry than ever before i think #read some real 'classics' and enjoyed most of them a lot #if you're curious about anything on here or just wanna talk about any of these books *please* send me an ask or something #i love talking about books

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goalhofer · 7 months ago

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2024 Chicago Cubs Players By Nationality

American: 22 (Yency Almonte, Cody Bellinger, Ben Brown, Michael Busch, Garrett Cooper, Yan Gomes, Ian Happ, Kyle Hendricks, Nicholas Hoerner, Caleb Kilian, Mark Leiter; Jr., Luke Little, Nick Madrigal, Miles Mastrobuoni, Julian Merryweather, Todd Smyly; Jr., Justin Steele, James Swanson, Jameson Taillon, Mike Tauchman, Jordan Wicks & Patrick Wisdom) Dominican: 2 (Christopher Morel & Héctor Neris) Japanese: 2 (Suzuki Seiya & Imanaga Shōta) Venezuelan: 2 (Adbert Alzolay & Daniel Palencia) Mexican: 1 (Javier Assad) Panamanian: 1 (Miguel Amaya)

#Sports #Baseball #MLB #Chicago Cubs #Celebrities #U.S.A.#U.S.#Dominican Republic #Japan #Venezuela #Mexico #Panama

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parfumieren · 1 year ago

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Amanda (Amanda Lepore)

Of all the celebrities in the world, I chose her. I could have had Britney, J.Lo, Maria, Fergie, Celine, or Elizabeth Taylor-- heck, even Tilda Swinton, if androgyny was so compelling….

But no. My very deliberate first choice of celebrity perfume came from an aging transgender socialite with a rampant cosmetic surgery addiction and four dance-mix EPs that can best be described as unlistenable.

Why her? Why Amanda Lepore?

For those not in the know, Amanda Lepore is the steely-yet-vulnerable, thoroughly unshockable, plastic-fantastic queen of Manhattan's stygian depths. During the legendary '90's, Amanda ran with the likes of James Saint James, Richie Rich, DJ Keoki, and the Club Kids' notorious Svengali, Michael Alig. Her über-smooth, surgically-enhanced visage -- complete with cherry-red lips pumped full-to-bursting with collagen -- provided photographer and lifelong friend David LaChappelle with decades of inspiration. On the other hand, it's also attracted a particularly nasty brand of social editorial, scathing in its rejection of the blurred gender line.

But rest assured, I am not here to wield that weapon.

On the surface, Amanda's world is as far from my world as Pluto is to the sun. But I have been attracted to it all my life. I myself have walked the gender identity tightrope, as have many of my idols: David Bowie, Patti Smith, Nico and Candy Darling, Lili Elbe, Justin Vivian Bond, Kate Bornstein, Charles Busch, John Cameron Mitchell, Eddie Izzard, Divine. I identify more with these outlaws of the gender frontier than I do with Britney & Co. any day. And because of all this, I desperately wanted Amanda not to fail. I longed to see her perfume blow away all the haters and baiters and nasty naysayers.

Due to its limited production (only 5,000 bottles released) and prohibitive price tag ($900+), it appears that precious few samples of Amanda ever made their way into the hands of reviewers. Most journalists, online and off, merely recycled the most shocking snippets from the office press release. Its bottle (encrusted with 1,000 Swarovski crystals!) and its preposterous ingredients (red lipstick! Steamed rice! A dash of real Cristal® champagne"!) set Amanda up to be a magnificent train wreck.

Yet Luca Turin swore up and down that the damned thing had merit. He raved about the marvelous job done by Christophe Laudamiel to harness and tame its sizable iris content (which -- more than any amount of tacky bling -- surely accounted for that massive price tag).

If this was the Holy Grail of trash fragrances, loyalty drove this kitten to undertake a quest. In the end I found a tiny decant listed at a 60% percent discount-- perfect for me, since naturally I don't have a month's rent to spend on a single perfume. What else could I do? I snapped it up.

While waiting for its delivery, I confess I began to suffer from buyer's remorse. Had I really stopped to consider what a former Club Kid's perfume might smell like? I envisioned sweaty cleavage encased in a cruelly boned corset, whose black organza and lace had absorbed an evening's worth of subway stench, cigarette smoke, spilled bubbly and lightly toasted ketamine. (What can I say? I've read AND watched Party Monster far too often for my own good.) Even worse, I imagined the smell of the corset's matching black lace panties. A boozy, sexy, sticky, spent-all-night-at-the-club-and-can't-be-bothered-to-shower-now sort of smell. An ANGEL sort of smell.

What the hell had I done?

When Amanda arrived, I sat staring at the spray sample vial as if it held Eau de Kryptonite. I decided to apply it after a shower, not bothering to dress in case I found myself forced to break a land-speed record to get back under the hot spray.

Please, god, please-- don't let it be a scrubber, I found myself chanting. Come on, Amanda….

The first note shocked me cross-eyed. Are you fucking serious? I heard myself saying aloud. Apparently, yes she is. Delicate, delicious, and without a doubt feminine, here was the scent of steamed rice. When I first read those words in the press release, I'd thought it was a joke. But what now rose from my wrists was a remarkable facsimile of steamer-cooked Japanese short-grain brown rice, bran-rich and faintly woody. A mandarin note rode atop it, veiled as daintily in curls of steam as Lady Godiva in her long golden tresses. (Again, Amanda: are you fucking serious?)

A faint hint of fruity plastic -- the so-called "lipstick" accord -- followed, tailed by a tinge of something alcoholic. Cristal®? More like Gekkeikan. Yes, it was the unmistakable scent of warm plum sake. After expecting to be clocked in the head with a disco ball, to be ushered instead into the tatami room of a traditional kaiseki restaurant was near about the limit. The repast Amanda set before me was simple, impeccable, refined-- but she wasn't finished with me yet.

After ten minutes, the iris kicked in. The scent of iris shares so many olfactory characteristics with the notes that came before it -- rice, steam, gluten, wood, even plastic -- that I found myself whispering, Yes, yes, of course, I see it! It's not listed, but I trusted my own nose and that of Luca Turin: there's iris in here, all right. (In fact, I think that perhaps it alone creates that starchy-steam accord.)

After an hour, I was still fully engaged with the interweave of Amanda's three main accords: iris, rice, mandarin. At any given moment, one seemed more prominent than the others-- but a moment later, it gracefully ceded the foreground to another. I kept expecting a hostile takeover by something loathsome a la Angel, but it never came. Over and over, eternal, tranquil, they braided closely around one another - iris, rice, mandarin.

The watershed moment came when my spouse came home from work. I'd warned him that morning that my pulse points would be the staging area for an experiment-- possibly hazardous. Now I held my arm out to him. Correctly gauging the smile on my face as a green light, he leaned in cautiously to inhale, then nodded.

"That's really nice; what is that?" he said.

"It's Amanda," I replied.

"It's quieter than I expected," he said. "Pleasant."

"A keeper?"

"A keeper."

That night I wore it to an art gallery opening. With my spouse by my side and Amanda on my skin, I felt as though I was in the best of company. How does that song go?

Well she's all you'd ever want; She's the kind you'd like to flaunt and take to dinner. Well she always knows her place; She's got style, she's got grace-- she's a winner. She's a lady… and the lady is mine.

--Tom Jones "She's A Lady"

Scent Elements: Iris, mandarin, strawberry, woods, cucumber, "red lipstick", "steamed rice", and "champagne" accords. And Amanda. Beautiful, fascinating, unforgettable Amanda.

#amanda #amanda lepore #perfume review #parfümieren

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korrektheiten · 8 days ago

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Tatort: Guter Polizist, böser Polizist war gestern

Tichy:»Wer nach dem reißerischen Titel „Unter Feuer“ etwas von dem Geist erwartet hat, dem Kriminalrat a.D. Otto Winkler (Uwe Preuss, spielt den Vater von Kommissarin Winkler) zuprostet: „Ich trinke auf Mut und Opferbereitschaft!“, der hat sich getäuscht. Vielmehr hat Autor Christoph Busche da angeknüpft, wo der Tatort vom letzten Wochenende („Dein gutes Recht“, Ludwigshafen) aufgehört Der Beitrag Tatort: Guter Polizist, böser Polizist war gestern erschien zuerst auf Tichys Einblick. http://dlvr.it/TG0CfY «

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brookstonalmanac · 2 months ago

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Beer Events 9.9

Events

Louis Pasteur visited Whitbread Brewery (England; 1871)

John Smith died (1879)

David Ripley patented a beer Faucet (1890)

Harry Torchiani patented an Apparatus for Racking Off Beer (1902)

1st National CAMRA beer festival held (Covent Garden; 1974)

Anheuser-Busch patented a Beer Foam Enhancing Process and Apparatus (1986)

Christopher Beauchamp patented a Foot Operated Beer Keg Pressurizer (1997)

American Eats: Beer, Season 1, Episode 11, debuted (2006)

Stone 09.09.09 Vertical Epic released (2009)

Belgian Beer World opens (2023)

Breweries Opened

Continental Brewing (Philadelphia, Pennsylvania; 1866)

Buffalo Bill's Brewery (California; 1983)

Sharky's Brewery & Grill (Nebraska; 1992)

Lakeside Brewery (Canada; 1993)

Fredericksburg Brewing (Texas; 1994)

Matsushima Brewery Pub Restaurant (Japan; 1997)

Airbrau (Germany; 1999)

Milton Brewery (England; 1999)

Phoenix Nest Brewing (Arizona; 1999)

#Events

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horseweb-de · 4 months ago

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#Claas-ChristophGröpper #CSE #Ehlersdorf

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folkbellies · 4 months ago

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Chapter 1 Humble Beginnnings

Chapter One | Humble beginnings part 1 November 19, 2014. This is the most influential date of my lifetime, or maybe that’s June 10, 2023. It was the day my life changed for better or for worse, or whatever they say. No, that’s not the day I got married, but it may as well have been.

November 19, 2014 is the day I fell in love at first sight with Christopher Ryan Willey (WILL-Lee). He would have wanted me to put emphasis on the pronunciation of his last name.

I’ll give a little background on me. I was born on a Friday, June 14, 1991, as Alexandria Christine Taylor. I was raised by my mom, Sheila, a true badass hippy lady who didn’t take shit and my dad, Leroy, a marijuana advocate musician that struggled with addiction and has a strong faith in Jesus.

The youngest of three with my sister, Camille, the artistic, quirky, intellectual middle child and my brother Daniel, the quiet, nerdy, intelligent oldest child. As far as families go, I believe we are all pretty close and have a rather unconventional, yet deep love for one another.

In my childhood years, the motto was ‘Never go a day without a hug’ and ‘Do as I say, not as I do.’ We all vibe really well and bonding over a fat joint isn’t beyond us. I met the best of friends any girl could dream of having as soon as I moved to Florida when I was 4. Her name was Tiffany Crystal Worman and I met her after my families very spontaneous, unplanned move from Dillwyn, VA because an undercover FBI agent was apparently investigating my dad for getting mailed hundreds of hits of acid from New York.

I met Tiffany in Van Doren Avenue in New Port Richey. Tiffany and I lived on the same street and her mom waitressed at the Denny’s my dad cooked at.

I did not want to be friends with her when I first met her. Pink bow, pink sparkly dress and matching sparkly Mary Jane’s against my disheveled long hair, oversized Pocahontas T-shirt and purple pants and I was either barefoot or my laces weren’t tied.

But, after our parents forced our friendship we immediately clicked.

She had everything I ever wanted from a family. A nice house, family portraits, lots and lots of toys! Tiffany and our families spent every holiday and birthday together. Her mom even got us season passes to Busch Gardens every year. We went through our phases of worshipping Eminem and The Used and I’d spend weeks at a time at her house like a second home, going to Youth Group and summer camps. We were inseparable.

I spent my younger years wondering about the swamps, feeding gators little frogs I’d find and coming home with a missing shoe.

Around age 6 I saw firsthand the fight that resulted in their eventual divorce. Looking back on it, I remember the pain in my mother’s eyes and her screams from all the years of being mistreated and cheated on. I saw it break her down until she couldn’t take it anymore.

I saw her lunge at my father with a boot horn and him back up and fell into the ironing board. But, I also remember my mom making me walk with her to the pay phone outside of the Big lots in the Southgate shopping center to call 911, she made me say I saw daddy hit mommy and he spent the night in jail.

I remember being so very little and having the police pull me Camille and Daniel to the side and ask us if we ever saw daddy hit mommy and us all say no and then ask if we ever saw them smoke something that smelled funny or wasn’t a cigarette and being trained at a really young age we all knew to say no.

When I was 8, as a means to fix their broken marriage, my parents decided to sell everything we owned and put the rest in storage. They bought an RV and we drove to New Jersey to spend some time with our cousin Megan, then hopped on a plane in New York City to London, England. I thought I was saying my very last goodbye to the most important person in my world, Tiffany.

We backpacked from London to Wales and took a ferry to Dublin where we spent Christmas Eve and Day. Then, we took a bus to Sligo and spent time up there with my Great Uncle Christi and got to see the town my maternal grandmother lived in. Ireland was absolutely incredible with the greenest grass a shade you weren’t even aware you could see, castles built in the sides of every mountain and sheep as large as buffalo.

We almost moved Chapter 24 | Treatment My mom picked me up almost immediately after Chris had left and we drove to my dads house 3 hours away in a small town called Crescent City. My dad had a small plot of land with a single wide trailer on it as well as the 5th wheel that my sister and her family lived in.

There was a lot going on for the two or three days that I was there. I tried my best to be as festive as I possibly could, at least for my Nephew Axle, but I just didn’t have the energy for it.

I spent most of my time catching up on sleep in the back bedroom in my sister’s RV and I ate. I ate like I hadn’t seen food in ages. Granted, the traditional meal cooked on Thanksgiving and Christmas happened to be my favorite dishes to speak of.

I sat my whole family down at one point during my stay and I apologized for my most recent fuckery when I came back from Seattle. I told them about my plans to go to detox so that they can get me into a rehab and after rehab I would be going into sober living. I told them I was finally done with my life of drug use and addiction and I was ready to heal.

Then the question they had all been waiting for me to answer: Was I going to go back to Chris? Of course, I had every intention of going back to Chris but for the sake of my family I decided to lie. I said I had no intentions to ever speak to him again. I said whatever needed to be said in order for the subject to be changed.

On the way back to Pasco County my mom stops by the BayCare Harbor in Port Richey and I get out of the car with all my bags and I rang the doorbell at the front entrance of the detox facility.

They let me right in the door and I gave my mom a hug and a kiss goodbye.

This was a huge step for me… admitting I needed help and actually going out to seek it on my own. All by myself.

I hardly remember detox. I did happen to meet two very nice gentleman while I was there – Stephen and Jacob. I gave them both my contact information for when I got out of rehab they could hit me up.

I spent 5 long days in detox. But, it was just the amount of time needed to facilitate me going to a rehab center. I was accepted at two different facilities. One was the Phoenix House in the Ocala area and the other one was called Acts Keystone which was much closer in Tarpon Springs. I chose Acts.

On December 30th of 2022 BayCare had placed me in my Uber and sent me to my very first rehabilitation center. It was a 90 day program and I had every intention of staying the entire duration of that time. Phone calls would be made once a week to one number only, computer use was prohibited and there was no smoking (or vaping) allowed.

I brought everything I owned with me and luckily for me my amazing mother had my back and bought me a small AM/FM radio, my own pillow and blanket, and I was allowed to have my gel pens.

At admission, they took my belongings and put them inside a heat treated bag that was meant to kill off bedbugs or any other germs. I met a girl in my intake who was also just arriving and her name was Caelon (Kay-Lynn). Caelon was roughly the same age as me with a fentanyl and meth addiction and she had just moved to Florida in the previous years from St. Louis MO.

We hit it off really quickly and to our surprise they decided to make us bunkies in dorm number 2. I met a lot of people while in rehab but the ones who stood out the most were Caelon, Kayla, and Allyson. Kayla and Allyson had been in treatment together for a while, having waited on a bed to open up while having to sit in a jail cell, they arrived at Acts together too.

The very first thing I found to complain about was the food. Who cares that the food was borderline uneatable but the portion sizes were for toddlers. I couldn’t order my restricted diet because if I did I’d have to eat nothing but a salad for 90 whole days and I don’t think I could have handled that.

But, men ran the kitchen so there wasn’t anything we could do about it.

I dove right into my recovery as soon as I got there. It took a minute to transition from the holiday schedule and Covid outbreak that happened before I got there but once we got back on schedule and they figured out which therapist they were going to assign me I made sure to complete the Phase A packet and start working on my step work.

The schedule for rehab looked a little like this:

730 Breakfast

800 clean

900 roll call/stretch/walk

10-12 groups

12-1 lunch

1-3 groups

4-5 free time

5-6 dinner

Doors to outside closed at dusk

615 coffee

7-8 AA/NA

As far as the curriculum was concerned, I was a rock star! Apparent not very many clients bother with doing the step work because you can’t really get a sponsor while in rehab and they don’t want to do step work without one. I was blowing through a step every week. I tried to be an overachiever and finish my Phase packets ahead of schedule but they only accept the packets every 30 days.

Caelon and Kayla got voted into the kitchen with me as a back up which quickly turned into me taking Kayla’s spot because she sucked at waking up in the morning.

A new girl came into Acts right around the same time we got voted into the kitchen. Her name is Amanda and she was an adorable southern bell.

It started off with just me and Kayla going out into the tall grass field after dinner and laying down to watch the waves in the sunset or to catch a group of deer frolicking at the base of the woods. Then, after sharing with them the magic we seemed to always share together soon it was me, Kayla, Caelon and Amanda every day after dinner just laughing, listening to music and telling each other stories of our life.

Those girls got me through rehab like they wouldn’t believe. I don’t know what I’d have done without those stress relieving magical nights sitting in the tall grass with my best friends. KEYSTONE KILLERS!

I tried my very first red meat burger while I was in rehab and I absolutely fell in love with burgers from that day forward.

There was a man at Keystone, his name was Michael or Big Mike for he was like 6’5. He practiced witchcraft and he had a very intense yet powerful outlook on recovery. He let me borrow a book that belonged to him called “The Power Of Now” which was all about living in the present moment and nothing else. But, not in the sense that you can set goals for yourself because that’s just preposterous. Living in the Now is more of a mentality than anything. It was an incredible book.

Big Mike frequently would lead the meetings for AA or NA whenever our guest speakers wouldn’t show up. He was very insightful and there was more than one occasion I sat with him to pick his brain about how he thought I could heal from my trauma.

I cried a lot in rehab. Actually, when I had first got there they had put me on a prescription for Wellbutrin and it took just about all of me not to kill myself right there. My depression got so bad that I actually handed in my razors to the BHTs. I immediately stopped taking my meds and talked to the psych doctor about switching my meds and he put me on Abilify, remeron and a low dose anti anxiety medication which ended up working much better for me.

By the time I was halfway through, I was over being there. I was able to get in contact with Chris’ mom while there and she informed me he had made it to Maryland and wanted to file for divorce. He wasn’t coming up off of his phone number for me. The entire time I was there I had this gut wrenching feeling that he may overdose while we were apart. I knew from his mom that he had made it to Baltimore and from there his grandfather bought him a ticket to Salisbury.

I knew he was with his family but I also knew that was prime opiate stomping grounds and I was worried.

My teeth started giving me a lot of trouble while in rehab so I scheduled a day to go to the dentist. At Dr. Monticello’s office I had 5 teeth pulled.

By day 50 I had enough of rehab and checked myself out. for good but by the Grace of God something changed my parents mind, and we unpacked the shipping container and stayed in New Port Richey, Florida.

To no surprise, the efforts to save my parents marriage failed and as a result my father decided to take off, pursuing the life of a rock star and headed to Amsterdam to find his dream band. I remember the heart breaking feeling I had watching him leave on that greyhound bus. I thought I’d never see him again. He was gone for a few months before flying into Miami and getting arrested for cocaine possession.

Driving 3 hours there and back just to have to see him through a glass window in the wall talking through a corded phone. Saying goodbye and holding our hands up to the window, pressing them up to one another through two-inch thick glass. I was a codependent daddy’s girl, and I was so hurt, seeing him in his blue jumpsuit every couple of months or so for almost a year.

My mom drank a lot back then. But, she had it rough raising 3 kids all about to go through puberty, fighting all the time, her working full time and paying all the bills herself while her party animal, drug using husband partied and traveled the world and ended up in jail. There’s no way I could have possibly done any better, but a kid remembers.

There were bad days like the time my brother sucker punched my sister and made her cry, so she grabbed him by the rat tail and slammed his face into the coffee table. Or the time I got in a bike accident and instead of taking me to the hospital my mom told me, and I will never forget “Suck it up and don’t bitch!” Meanwhile I’m staying at Tiffany’s and eating mashed potatoes and applesauce for months after. But, I still remind myself that mothering never came naturally for my mom.

#elevatedellie #humblebeginnings #drugs #addiction #recovery #therapy #lifestory

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newagesispage · 5 months ago

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JUNE 2024

THE RIB PAGE

*****

Climax Foods won at the Good Food awards for their vegan cheese but they were disqualified! The rules claimed the product had to be retail ready and could nnot contain kokum butter. PETA ended up giving them an award. Why does Ted Cruz pronounce it, “vagan?” ** Why is Cruz against Biden’s help for airline passengers?

*****

The Stones are still on tour. They played Jazz fest in NOLA. They sure did justice to Let it Bleed but Out of Time was a bit loooong!!

*****

Seinfeld’s movie, Unfrosted is not getting the best reviews but I did love what he said on Kimmel. With disdain he said, “I don’t do twitter.” Yes! ** But.. Jerry has finally brought some controversy into his life. Protestors are ruining his gigs and students walked out at Duke U for his commencement address because of his support of Israel.

*****

Days alert: The character Rita is fucking awesome. I am reminded of Elinor Donahue from earlier Dimera times. EJ needs an assistant who knows the secrets and puts up with no shit! ** Holly really is horrible. OD ing did nothing to help her attitude. ** Bring Jen Lilley back!! ** I couldn’t be more thrilled about Diedre Hall and Christopher Lloyd’s successful turn on Hacks!!!!! ** Hooray.. Lucas is back on the scene! More Please!! ** I miss Wendy and Tripp!! ** The gang is meeting up in Montana. Do we have a summer adventure?? Just don’t kill off Clyde.

*****

Protesters attempted to storm the Berlin Tesla factory. ** Neurolink’s first brain chip has malfunctioned.

*****

So loved Jodie Whittaker but also hooray for Ncuti Gatwa of Dr. Who!!!!!!

*****

Joe Manchin has registered as an independent.

*****

The French Open put an alcohol ban in place.

Giuliani thought he was so funny when he taunted those trying to serve him a warrant. It was the last day and he teased on his podcast that they could not find him. This made it easy to find him and the warrant was served.

*****

Judge Judy has sued the National Enquirer and In Touch magazine.

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Riley Keough and Elvis Presley Enterprises had to put a halt to a company called Naussany Investments and their attempt to auction off Graceland. Word is they had fraudulent paperwork that claimed Lisa Marie had taken out a loan and never repaid it. This company will probably be shunned, Elvis fans don’t fucking kid around.

*****

Vermont is the first state to require oil companies to pay for damage from climate change.

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Israel shut down an Ap news feed in Gaza. They later said they would return the equipment. *****

Ricky Stenhouse Jr. Was fined $75,000 by Nascar for a brawl with Kyle Busch. Busch knocked him out in the 2nd lap of the race. Stenhouse waited the race out to confront Busch. Stenhouse Sr. and 2 other teammates were also punished. Most think the $75,000 fine was too much. ** Christopher Bell won the Coca Cola 600. ** Stewart Haas racing will fold after this season.

*****

Watched a couple of Apple’s newer offerings. Sugar, with James Cromwell and Colin Farrel gave us that film noir vibe and held surprises. And Cromwell was lookin’ fine as hell!!!!Palm Royale took a bit for me to get into but once Mindy Cohn and Julia Duffy got going, forget it, I was hooked. Hooray for Carol Burnett and the cliffhanger that makes me suddenly very excited for this show to come back!!

*****

In Virginia, Stonewall Jackson high’s name was changed to Mountain View and Ashby-Lee was changed to Honey Run elementary. Locals have now voted to change them back. I guess they can’t celebrate their traitors enough.

*****

On her 18th birthday, Shiloh Jolie-Pitt has filed to drop the ‘Pitt’ from her name. Other siblings have dropped the ‘Pitt’ as well.

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An appeals court has upheld Steve Bannon’s conviction.

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An investigation is looking into Matthew Perry’s death.

*****

Camryn Manheim has left Law and Order. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! No Sam? No Camryn? Ok.. Tony Goldwyn makes sense to replace Waterston but Manheim was my favorite part of the new L&O. We were just beginning to learn her character’s story. She was perfect!!!!! Also.. NBC boneheads have moved Organized Crime to Peacock. Way to ruin a perfect line-up!

*****

I am so happy for Cole Escola and his Broadway triumph with Oh Mary!

*****

Every society gets the kind of criminal it deserves. -Robert Kennedy

*****

Daily weed use has surpassed the daily use of alcohol.

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Uvalde shooting victims families have a $2mil settlement with the city. They are now getting ready to file lawsuits against dozens of Texas department of public safety officers and the school district.

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Louisianna has approved a bill to classify abortion pills as a controlled substance.

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The U.S. has sued Live Nation to break up the Ticketmaster monopoly.

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Kristi Noem has now been banned from ALL tribal lands in her state of South Dakota.

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Carlo Acutis died in 2006 and is now on track to become the youngest saint.

*****

Farm Family Foods is opening a farm to table grocery in Benson, Il and hoping to expand. Small towns are slowly losing their grocery stores. Some are left with Dollar stores, convenient stores or nothing. Good luck!!!

*****

So.. Harrison Butker, who I had never heard of, seems like a real pig. The Kansas City Chief seems completely unaware that he does not live in1824. He attacked pride month, the transgender community and working women. His commencement speech at the Benedictine college has been poo poo’d by nearly everyone including the college itself and especially the Benedictine sisters. They released a statement: The Catholic, Benedictine, liberal arts college don’t believe this represents what the founders envisioned. Instead of promoting unity, his comments seem to foster division. One of our concerns was the assertion that being a homemaker is the highest calling for a woman. We sisters have dedicated our lives to God and God’s people including many women whom we have taught and influenced over the past 160 years.** The NFL has also spoke up to let us know these are not their views.** The only people afraid of a strong, financially independent and successful female, is men like this. And the only reason they are afraid is because it diminishes their power and their control. -Celeste Yvonne

*****

The International Court is requesting the arrest of Hamas leader Sinwar and Benjamin Netanyahu. Yes! ** What happened is not genocide. We reject that. -Joe Biden

*****

Get ready for a new Downton Abbey film with Paul Giamatti!!!!

*****

In Kansas, Ricky Alderete went to court for a stolen Jackie Robinson statue taken to scrap the metal. The community raised money to replace it but now MLB has replaced it.

*****

Frankie Valli and the four seasons got a star on the Hollywood Walk of fame.

*****

Roger Daltrey is working on a biopic of Keith Moon.

*****

Jordan Klepper has really been on fire lately. So you think you can Pence?

*****

The Arizona Senate repealed the 1864 abortion ban.

*****

Mystik Dan won the Kentucky Derby.

*****

On his visit to Biden : “The most legislatively successful President in my lifetime”. -Mark Hamill

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Trump only seems to pay attention in court when they are looking at clips of Trump .** Why do we have to hear about the gas and his general odor? ** I can see why the man looks up to President Jackson because this sounds familiar. “He assumed upon himself authority and power not conferred by the constitution and laws, but in derogation of both.” - Andrew Jackson’s Senate censure which was removed 3 years later. ** Does Fox news know how a trial works? They sure want special treatment for their boy. They kept up the mantra: “Is this America?” Yes, the process is working. Duh?! ** Rod Blagojevich endorsed Trump. A bunch of the minions put on their red ties and showed up at the trial. J.D. Vance who once called out Trump is now one of the biggest VP wannabes. Is he a psychopath or did he also drink the flavor-aid? ** It seems that this is what it all comes down to. So many people think they can do any fucking thing they want with no consequences. Was he more influenced by Nietzsche or Cohn? ** As the defense began, witness Robert Costello was a smart ass to the judge and the courtroom was cleared. There is no respect for anyone. Trump vowed to testify but he did not. ** Eric was there every day and Don Jr. Showed up on the final day of testimony. On May 30, Trump was found guilty on all 34 counts. He will be sentenced in July. I know we’re all glad that he is starting to pay for his sins but we can’t drop the ball now. November is coming. **“I’m a very innocent man.” -Scary Clown 45/34. The trump trial is done and the Hunter Biden trial begins. ** Chad Daybell was also found guilty May 30, a great day for justice.

*****

Now that Trump has been found guilty, his cult members are angry. They do not seem to want to face reality. Why is violence always their answer? ** Justice has been served. Donald Trump is a racist, a homophobe, a grifter and a threat to this country. He can now add 1 more title to his list- a felon. - JB Pritzker ** People keep saying, “How can he run for President when he can’t even vote?” I do not understand this because from what I can tell, When a Florida resident is convicted, the state defers to the state the conviction came from. In NY, he CAN vote IF he is not incarcerated. But, I mean it’s time.. Lock him up. ** Social media went crazy with pics of Hillary outside the jail cell and gold Trump sneakers with ankle monitors. ** I wonder how many people in here have cars? - Trump

*****

Colbert called Trump’s campaign The complaining for Applause tour. ** DC Weekly is a publication out of Russia. It is said to be widely read by republicans. The paper loves to call the Truth Social crowd, “useful idiots.” When I hear Trump trying to make sense of what they, “believe,” It seems like wrestling with dementia. ** I nearly escaped death. - Trump ** I often think that the left gets so perplexed by some of the right is that this country should have progressed so much more by now. People should be much more educated now and with more knowledge there should be less racism and differences to fight over. There should be some common ideas we agree on but ignorance keeps that from happening. It is like the old slavers and successionists have just begat Trumpers.

*****

Truth Social lost $328 mil. ** So what is it? Is Biden a mastermind or is he a dottering old fool? Trump claims both. ** Trump issued a cease and desist for the Trump movie that premiered at Cannes. Of course he did. The man lives for court! It will be great publicity. ** This is my country. This guy wants to destroy it. -Robert DeNiro

*****

Queer Planet sounds interesting!!

*****

Night Court was renewed for season 3. ** Hacks was renewed for season 4!!

*****

Randy Travis with the use of some A.I. has new music with More life!! And he still looks great!

*****

The Black Keys and J Lo have cancelled their 2024 tours.

*****

CBS is bringing Hollywood Squares back AGAIN!

*****

Thanks to Holly and Beekeeper Mel for restoring my faith in nice people.

*****

Jennifer Aniston is producing a reimagining of 9 to 5.

*****

New research shows that part of the River Nile was right near most of the pyramids at the time of construction. This would make transport so much easier. This answers one of the big questions.

*****

The Pace Program in Illinois is a new all -inclusive care for the elderly. The program, which should be available in June, will simplify access to services and prevent fragmented care. The elderly should be able to stay in their homes longer and things should be more streamlined. I sure hope this works because it can be a mess to get started in the system.

*****

David DePape who was found guilty of attempting to kidnap Paul Pelosi and was given 30 years.

*****

Every Rainbow Fades.

*****

El Califade Leon in Mexico City is the first taco stand to ever get a Michelin star.

*****

Richard Blumenthal informed us that Justice Alito had a ‘stop the steal’ sign at his house. He flew an upside- down flag outside his house in January along with other pro Trumpers to show support. Alito claims it was his wife (just like Menedez), retaliating against the Pro Biden neighbors. This is not the only flag that they flew. Other property flew the appeal to heaven flag. Dick Durbin has asked him to recuse himself from the Jan. 6 cases. He refuses! Pretty fucking unpatriotic Mr. Alito!! It figures that you would have no respect for our flag. ** Hey.. Thomas! Alito! Resign!!

*****

It turns out that RFK Jr. has a lifeless worm in his brain. A past divorce claimed he couldn’t earn much for the ex because of memory loss etc. from worm and mercury poisoning. Kevin Spacey and Rob Schneider have endorsed him. So... Candidates in their 80’s or in their 70’s with worm? What? ** RFK Jr. Says that he opposes gender affirming care and hormone therapy for minors. So.. Do you want the government in your life or not??

*****

Joe Biden is holding back some weapons to Israel just as Reagan and Bush did before him. ** The State Department gave $275 mil in aid to Ukraine. ** Oreos are being made again in Ukraine after the factory was repaired.

*****

Biden and Trump claim they will debate on June 27 and Sept. 10.

*****

Giuliani says that he is a pauper and can’t pay his legal bills. Why are these greedy fucks still free?

*****

The Green Goblin (MTG) is at it again as she tries to belittle others. The house got heated and in retaliation, she was called a blonde bad built butch body.

*****

The Florida Republicans wanted Barron Trump to be at the convention this year since he is 18. The Republican convention will be held in Milwaukee July 15-18. Scary Clown 45 gave his blessing but Melania’s camp said, “no.” Apparently, he has prior commitments. ** Mike Johnson and other court jesters showed up dressed like Trump to support him in court. Talk about showboating! ** Jeff Sessions was back in the news when Michael Cohen testified about trying to quash investigations into campaign contributions. ** Cohen was stealing from the Trump organization. Cohen still lives in a Trump building. What?

*****

Cannes brought controversy this year. Francis Ford Coppola with Megalopolis and Kevin Costner with Horizon have bet their own $ on their epics. Other films include The Apprentice, about a younger Trump that stars Sebastian Stan and Jeremy Strong as Roy Cohn. The film is having trouble finding a distributor. Bird and The Substance are getting lots of buzz! There is also Kinds of Kindness and All we Imagine as light. Meryl Streep and George Lucas received honorary awards. There are rumors that the French media would release a list of alleged abusive actors and directors. ** Black Dog won the Un Certain Regard, Anora won the Pale d’Or, the women of Emilia Perez won best actress and Jesse Plemons took best actor. Best screenplay went to the Substance.

*****

Red Lobster has filed for bankruptcy and closed dozens of stores. Everybody blames the endless shrimp. I am telling you, it’s the biscuits. Switching to using frozen and not fresh makes all the difference. Besides, middle of the road eateries are falling away.

*****

There was a Tom Brady roast. With tempers the way they are, it might be best to put those to bed for a while.

*****

The Conners will end after a shortened season 7.

*****

Turkey has halted trade with Israel.

*****

Camryn Manheim will leave Law and Order. NOOOOOO! She is the best thing there. Goldwyn is good but no Sam and no Camryn? Bummer.

*****

Now that Barry is done, A Gene Cousineau film from prison would be great.

*****

If my uterus shot bullets, would you stop regulating it??

*****

The late- night hosts make fun of local news that all repeat the same lines. The latest was,” I can’t believe it’s May1st.” I grew up with the people who said this stuff all the time. This generic dialogue really works for those people. I have never really understood those who say the same things every year, are surprised when the first snow comes or wonder at how it gets dark so early. These things should no longer be a surprise to adults!

*****

Kristi Noem seems to have gone down for killing animals. I guess there is a limit! ** Her book was changed before it even came out. She talked of meeting Kim Jong Un but she didn’t and won’t admit it but took it out of the book? What other lies are in there?

*****

Millie Bobby Brown married Jake Bongiovi.

*****

Natasha Lyonne will join the Fantastic Four.

****

Slovak Prime Minister Robert Fico was shot.

*****

Sexual assault news: Liam Neeson and others are starting to stick up for Kevin Spacey so he may come back. ** David C. Field has a new batch of allegations by 16 women. He has been accused of sexual abuse, lewd conduct, groping, drugging and rape. ** Video was released of Sean Combs beating and kicking Cassie Ventura. Big surprise.. Another lying abuser! ** Writer, producer Eric Weinberg has been charged with 28 counts of rape and sexual battery.

*****

The Met Gala came. The garden theme brought such interesting looks. Mindy Kaling and Demi Moore had such structure. J Lo showed it all and Cardi B needed 10 men. My favorites were Zendaya, Bad Bunny, Gigi Hadid, La La Anthony, Nicole Kidman, Lana Del Ray, Ayo Edebiri, Usher, Lily James, Cole Escola, Kieran Culkin, Jazz Charton, Sydney Sweeney, Michelle Williams, Meg Ryan, Daniel Levy, Cynthia Erivo, Odell Beckham, Josh O’Conner and Sarah Paulson. Greta Gerwig looked so uncomfortable. Tyla was in sand!

*****

Russia is apparently using North Korean weapons and Cuban soldiers to kill Ukrainians.

*****

Knives Out 3 with Daniel Craig is in the works.

*****

I want some Bob Schieffer art!!!!!!

*****

R.I.P. Duane Eddy, Taji the giraffe, Richard Tandy, Susan Backlinie, Darius Morris, Edgar Lansbury, Bernard Hill, Daniel Kramer, Andrew Davis, Susan Buckner, Sam Rubin, Bob Ellison, Rudy Moreno, Jim Simons, victims of the Houston storms, Gayle McKinney- Griffin, Pete McCoskey, Ian Gelder, Alice Stewart, Jon Wysocki, Bill Walton, Sam Butcher, Richard Foronjy, Iowa tornado victims, Chester, Pa. Shooting victims, war victims, Richard Sherman, Johnny Wactor, Memorial Day storm victims, Mexico election victims, Morgan Spurlock, Darryl Hickman, Haiti missionaries, Alice Munroe, Charlie Colin, Caleb Carr, President Raisi, Hossein Amirabdollahian, Jeannie Epper, landslide victims, Grayson Murray, Gujarat fire victims, Mark Damon, Dabney Coleman and Roger Corman.

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