#Christian out his writing poetry lmao

[fcb-mv33]

"On a pretty dreary day, he shone pretty brightly today."💙

[alaskan-wallflower]

What are your favorite ponyboy hcs

there are a few!

i love thinking darry is called darry because pony couldn’t say darrel lmfao-also his first full word being soda is kinda cute because i headcanon soda did NOT fw ponyboy as a kid (he was more mad ponyboy wasn’t an actual pony than the fact he had a brother) and he’d just be so mean to baby pony like pushing him down n shit 😭 but pony’s first word was def soda and soda will remind him of this DAILY.

“pony you remember when you first said my name”

*sigh*

pony is a chronic eye roller, he does not have a poker face. if someone says something stupid he’s literally rolling his eyes SO hard-he rolled his eyes at the teacher once because she was spewing some bullshit and he got detention lmfao-he rolls his eyes at darry a lot and it drives him nuts. he’d get told a lot as a kid ‘if you keep doing that your eyes are gonna get stuck that way’

pony had a speech impediment as a kid and as a result he tended to act out because he was frustrated he couldn’t talk and communicate to his parents about what he wanted. darry was the only one who could understand him and would calmly try to calm pony down and darry actually helped pony get rid of said impediment.

pony’s eyes are bigger than his stomach like he’ll order a truckload of food and be full after two bites. either that or pony has one hell of an appetite and darry.soda CANNOT keep up with it no matter how hard he tries

he has an anxious tummy :( when he’s really stressed his stomach will start gurgling and if it’s really bad he’ll get hiccups-it always happens when he’s taking a test and he gets so embarrassed because he just feels like everyone is looking at him-one time a teacher yelled at him for ‘being a distraction’ and he never wanted to go back to school after that

post book pony goes through a humongous growth spurt. he ends up being one or two inches taller than darry and he’s so smug about it and makes comments like ‘awwww who’s the little brother now?” and it pisses the gang off sometimes lmao

pony knows guitar because his mom taught him. he plays when he’s stressed. darry knows piano and they teach each other how to play their respective instruments. it’s a great time for both of them.

pony gets super into songwriting too-i head anon his mom taught him to sing at a young age and he just never stopped? he had to join choir in middle school for whatever reason and while he hated it at first he grew to love it a lot and he just feels free there. and when he’s stressed he tends to vent his emotions via poetry or drawing, so when he’s writing a poem he’ll put a beat to it sometimes. he’s played for his brothers and has made darry cry with a song dedicated to him (he would rather die than tell dallas though because he’s scared dallas won’t find him tuff anymore)

he’s big into greaser talk. the only time he won’t use “greaser slang” is when he’s trying to impress someone

pony is a very skilled artist. he’s drawn for johnny a lot.

he LOVES strawberries. his favourite dessert is strawberry shortcake but he only gets that for his birthday

(bumping off that) paul’s family owned a strawberry farm that pony used to sneak into to nab their berries. darry could talk pony out of trouble but was never happy about it. after paul and darry had their falling out pony snuck into their farm and had eaten every last berry on that farm and darry was so proud (and concerned and a bit mad because god forbid they pressed charges but pony reminds darry he could tell the cops about paul’s prank and blackmail him so that’s what they do lmao)

his eyes are more green than he’d care to admit. they’re still green grey but with an emphasis on green

i like interfaith curtis bros headcanons…so i feel like they were brought up with both jewish and christian traditions that darry tries to carry on

he knocked both his front teeth out at once by swinging from a tire swing at two bits house and slamming his face into a tree. he didn’t cry or anything though he just laughed it off. he swallowed the teeth though and was terrified the tooth fairy was gonna go into his stomach to get them out (based on true events)

he quits smoking because he can’t stand to think about how he may have indirectly killed johnny but also seeing how worried darry and soda were he couldn’t do that to them. it wasn’t a cold turkey process but it was successful

started smoking around thirteen years old and just never stopped til post book

he hates his hair ungreased but it’s the most beautiful fluffy mop of auburn hair ever

he’s not scared of spiders. hell straight up pick it up and put it outside. but he is afraid of moths and butterflies.

he’s a true carnivore. bro hates vegetables (darry had to get him vitamins instead)

let him ramble about his books. he will ramble for hours

him and cherry have a brother/sister relationship post book and she’ll go to his track meets sometimes along with darry and soda-they all get pretty close tbh

cherry takes pony to expensive cafés sometimes to help him study or just so the two can gossip

pony is a gossip KING like do not cross him

he comes up with really creative insults. half of them are stolen from johnny

he’s bisexual with a teeny preference for girls

he loves greek myths and compares darry to Hephaestus a lot

great expectations is a comfort book for him. if he’s sad he’ll read it in one sitting and enjoys it just as much as he did the first time he read it

he gets bad allergies in the spring and fall :(

him and darry work out together and bond over that just like they bonded over being in sports

he talks to himself when he reads

this wa s’more curtis bros than pony i’m sorry 😭 but hope these are good!

[historia-vitae-magistras]

It makes my heart soft for Arthur to treat Zee so gently not because she's his daughter but because she's a woman in a time where it was particularly awful to be a woman. He tried his best to respect her as a person and as his child without making her feel she's 'just' a woman. I'm curious how Lord Father would react to some poor bastard coming to ask him permission to court his daughter. I imagine it's that best laugh he's had in a long time, straight up doubled-over with tears in his eyes. Let's him know he'd have a better chance asking her directly but considering this start he's going to have a hell of a time. To quote Thedore Roosevelt: "I can either run the country or I can attend to Alice, but I cannot possibly do both."

ALL of this. It's not like the man isn't sexist because he is, but in a way that isn't purely Victorian. He's lived a long life; the first British person we know much about is Boadicea. He is the last son of a goddess who ruled with blood, sacrifice, fear and cunning. Brighid and he will have a testy relationship, but she was the high-status centre of the Celtic Christianity he will draw upon again and again. England's wealth before the empire was caught up in cloth. Women's work created him, and he knows that. As a child in the world of late antiquity, he sat at his mother's and Brighid's feet as they worked the loom. Disrespecting women's work disrespects most of his own history. Plus, if you read Anglo-Saxon poetry, there are these tantalizing hints that women's work was seen as more important to civilization than men's. He isn't a fantastic father, but he does view her as a person if nothing else. The sheer amount of regnant queens he's had.

And I do feel like he and Zee did direct any potential suiters to him first because very late Victorian/Early Edwardian courtship and society meant that his rejections on her behalf would pull any social blame of her being a bit haughty or potentially deviant and redirect it to him where it was fine. After all, a daughter's marriage is still much the father's prerogative. It was socially acceptable for her to remain unmarried as widowed men or even just men fond of their daughters often gave them the choice of staying home if they so wished. It could be a better setup, but it maximizes her freedom. Answering a question about why she is unwed with "because I'm a lesbian and I don't bloody want to be" is unacceptable and degenerate. But "Oh, I could never leave my poor dear Papa; he utterly depends on me" makes her ultra respectable and dutiful even if she hasn't seen the old fart since Christmas. It's also a way for Arthur to keep an eye on her. If people are writing to him about courting Dearest Eleanor, it's intel.

But the first time it happened? Oh, good lord, the man lost his absolute shit. Partially because she's his baby and just absolutely not, that's his last child. She's not even a century old; he does not care. She is a teenager now she is a baby. Two, the audacity some of these potatoes have. Whenever Zee puts effort into playing the part of being the beautiful young socialite in just the prettiest clothes, putting on her best manners, and utilizing all that intelligence for social purposes, he's got a line out the door. When Zee is cranky with him, she puts on a particularly flattering blue or green dress and goes to a dinner party and just fucks up the old man's week lmao. She goes on a social campaign to get her way about something, and Matt might end up taking a nap in a coffin on the dining room table to shut it all down if he's particularly irate with her because no one can come courting to a house in mourning lol. But man yeah, there is a reason her slightly anti-social ass wears so much mourning black to keep off.

[johnaeryns]

hi! I just scrolled a little on your acc and noticed in a tag you said you were a comp lit major! I’m a senior in high school and want to do comp lit in college and was wondering if you could tell me how you liked the major? I know it’ll be different depending on the school but I’ve never met anyone irl who’s done it so I’m looking for any info I can get :D.

omg no i'm so happy to talk about this any time! i absolutely love my major. at least at my school it's extremely flexible. you can either choose a language and another discipline, or two languages (which is the more traditional comp lit path), and your classes are split between those three departments. so for me it's about 25% english department, 25% french department, and 50% comparative literature department. however, there's also very few required classes which means you get a lot of electives that aren't confined to your major. that's one of my favorite parts because i can take any class under any subject code that i think looks interesting, and because comp lit is so interdisciplinary none of it feels disconnected to my actual work (i can also just take any english classes i want instead of having to fill requirements). i've taken classes in the philosophy, anthropology, art history, religious studies, and humanities departments and will probably add more in the future lmao.

that's all probably kind of specific to my school but i think that regardless of where you go, if you're someone who has a lot of interests, especially across the humanities or social sciences, you'll really like comparative literature. same with if you're someone who really likes languages. my experience with the comp lit department vs. the english department has been pretty similar, and there's generally quite a bit of overlap (including instructors, i met the professor who told me i should change my major in an english class lol), but there are a few differences. firstly, the comp lit department is typically quite a bit smaller. the negative sides of this are that there's far fewer classes offered, and the department tends to be a lot more spread out. the positive side is that it's a lot easier to form relationships with your professors and meet people with similar interests. i think you tend to get pretty good teachers in the humanities generally, but my experience has been that smaller departments tend to be people, both instructors and students, who really care about what they study. pretty much all of my good friends i've met here are comp lit majors or people i met in comp lit classes. this major in particular i think tends to attract people who really care about their work beyond just obligation and who take it very seriously, which isn't always easy to find in undergrad.

in terms of the actual classes, in english you are reading novels, plays, and/or poetry the vast majority of the time (unless it's a class specifically devoted to another genre). in comp lit you get those genres, but also a lot more film, tv, comics, etc., potentially in the same class. because it's such an all encompassing discipline, the classes are also a lot more specific. i've found a lot of them tend to focus on the professor's research interests, which makes sense considering that it's literally impossible to be an expert on all world languages and literatures. the biggest difference is that when you get to upper division and start reading more secondary sources and writing research essays, in english it's usually primarily criticism where in comp lit it's a lot of theory. theory, for me, is probably the most challenging part of literary studies. it's also one of the most exciting.

the difference is essentially the same as in any comparative field. for example: within religious studies you might be someone who specializes specifically in medieval christianity or in contemporary islam, etc., etc., the same way that you might specialize in medieval english literature, or 19th century russian literature, contemporary latin american literature, etc. however, if you study comparative religion, you're studying the phenomenon of religion as an entity. the same is true of comparative literature, you're studying literature as a concept. literary theory is essentially the philosophy of literature. the distinction carries over to courses, so in english you tend to more closely study the specific novels/eras/genres/authors/etc. (unless a comp lit prof is teaching the class and then you're still reading theory lol), where in comp lit you're usually trying to contextualize it both within its own literary tradition, and within the phenomenon of literature as a whole. theory is a big element of the english major, but it's the core of the comparative literature major.

hopefully that wasn't more than you were asking for, but i can't tell you how happy i am to talk about this ldkfjsk. what i study is really like, my love and my entire life so if you ever want to talk about it or have any questions please message me or send an ask. i honestly did not even know it was a thing until my professor told me about it, and i know they don't even offer it at a lot of schools at the undergraudate level, so i'm very happy you're considering it. i'm currently planning to continue studying literature postgrad and i'm seriously considering continuing with comparative literature. i really can't recommend it enough.

[blessedarethebinarybreakers]

What's your take on swearing as a christian? Also thanks for running this blog!!! i've weathered many a storm going through your FAQ and poetry tags,,,

i personally swear all the dang time!!! ...offline, that is. i say the f word at least 20 times a day haha. my opinion is this: if you choose to swear, be respectful in your swearing:

avoid swearing in front of kids, especially if you don’t know how their parents/guardians are choosing to raise them when it comes to swearing (you don’t wanna get them in trouble by teaching them a New Word lol) .

avoid swearing around people who have a reason to be uncomfortable with swearing (when i’m with someone new and am about to use a swear word, i’ll check in with them -- “are you okay with swearing?” If they aren’t, I don’t press them to tell me why -- I simply avoid swearing. Ya know, like a baseline decent human being) .

do NOT use slurs that aren’t aimed at an identity you belong to!! my white ass is never ever ever gonna use the N word. i also avoid the b word and c word because i’m not a woman. in my mind, slurs don’t even belong to the same category as swear words -- they’re way worse. (this should go without saying but ya know how people are)

i also recommend that you make a conscious decision about whether or not you want to swear at all and if so, in what situations. Don’t just sorta “fall into it” without giving it some thought, if possible. Do you want to be someone who saves swear words for Big Situations? Or do ya pepper ‘em into everyday sentences (like i do lmao) so that they lose a lot of their bite and are just kinda fun?

Gonna close this with a ~ Fun Bible Fact!!! ~ 

There are some swear words / instances of vulgar language peppered throughout the Bible!!

There is a word used in Judges 3:22 that is used nowhere else, and therefore scholars debate how to translate it. In the verse, my left-handed fave Ehud has just stabbed King Eglon in the abdomen, and הפרשדנה spills out from Eglon...whatever could that be? Some translate it euphemistically as “dirt.” But my seminary teacher (and I quite agree with her) argues that it is indeed a vulgar word for “shit.”  It makes sense that a vulgar swear word would be used in this passage because the whole story is dripping in irony and humor -- it’s a very irreverent story crafted to humiliate King Eglon. .

For more “shit” in the Hebrew Bible: I actually love this article from the Game for Good Christians site when it comes to the 6 uses of the Hebrew word peresh in the Bible. It does a great job of explaining how in 5 of those 6 uses, peresh ( “shit” ) is just used as like, a technical term -- talking about what to do with your bull’s shit (heh) in a sacrificial sense. But the sixth time, in Malachi 2:3, this word is clearly being used in a much more vulgar sort of way -- making it more logical to choose the word “shit” over “dung” or “poop” when translating it: “And now, O priests, this command is for you. If you will not listen, if you will not lay it to heart to give glory to my name, says the Lord of hosts, then...I will rebuke your offspring, and spread shit (peresh) on your faces, the shit (peresh) of your offerings, and I will put you out of my presence.” .

In Isaiah 64:6, meanwhile, the prophet laments that “our righteousness is like filthy rags” -- or so it’s commonly translated. However, that word “filthy” (or “stained”) is more specific in Hebrew: it’s about rags used during menstruation. So not a swear word, but pretty vulgar. .

Gendered slurs (like “whore”) are unfortunately pretty common among some of the prophets. i’m Not A Fan. (come AT me Hosea and Jeremiah i’ll FIGHT ya! Jeremiah you’re like 12, do you kiss your poor mother with that mouth!?) .

Paul himself uses a vulgar Greek word for shit!! In Philippians 3:8 he explains that everything that came to him before Christ he now regards as σκύβαλα (the accusative plural of the word σκύβαλον for any Greek lovers out there who wanna know how to say shit in the nominative form. Oh, and in our letters that’s skubalon.) Translators often pick a nice gentle word like “refuse” or at the very most “excrement” for this word....but nope, it’s a much terser word, no euphemisms in Paul’s writing here. It’s straight-up shit -- alternatively, I do love this translation I saw here: “I forfeited all things; and I consider them crap so that I may gain Christ.” .

Jesus, meanwhile, uses a slur -- *gasp!!* -- but don’t worry, he only names it to condemn those who use it against others (whew): “But I say unto you...whosoever shall say to his brother, Ῥακά (Raca), shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Μωρέ (Moré), shall be in danger of hell fire” (Matthew 5:22). Scholars debate whether this term raca was A Very Bad Word or just a kinda mean one (similar to English words like “idiot” or “fool”). The Gospels are all in Greek, but this word raca is actually from Jesus’ own first language, Aramaic. And yeah, it seems to have mean something like “empty-headed.” Meanwhile that second term Jesus denounces, Moré, is in Greek -- the nominative form is μωρὸς (moros) and is where we get the word moron (a word that I avoid in English because it’s got a super ableist history, btw). Paul also uses this word μωρὸς in some of my favorite biblical passages, such as in 1 Cor 1, when he proclaims that God’s foolishness is wiser than any wisdom of human beings, etc. It’s good stuff but i’m just rambling now

[thebellekeys]

I Love Matthew Fairchild aka Incoherent Thoughts about Chain of Iron (2021) by Cassandra Clare

I made one of these rant-rave reviews for SJM's book so check it out if you want, no pressure tho lmao.

Aight so I finished Chain of Iron last night and OMG I HAVE TO YELL like I loved it sooo much like yooo, I have a lot to say. I know the book is new so... beware for spoilers plebs.

Also context: I been reading the Shadowhunter books since I was 12 and I'm 19 now *insert dead emoji face* so yeah, I'm just so happy rn with where the Chronicles have come and the fact that they’re still ongoing *insert uwu face*. I remember when in like 2014-2015 or something when Cassandra Clare teased that Will and Tessa's kids' generation was gonna get a trilogy set in Edwardian London, loosely based on Great Expectations, and holy hell? I think that was perhaps one of the best days of my life considering how much I adore The Infernal Devices (that trilogy really changed the way I see YA literature... don't ask cus I won't shut up about it) (also yes I read TMI and loved it too but there's a “generation gap” between TMI and the other Shadowhunter books stylistically so don't ask me about that either cus I also won't shut up).

Anyway, shoo from here if you want a critical essay on Chain of Iron. I'm not providing that, this is just me raving here for the fun.

Listen... I want the bulk of this to just be two main things: The Matthew Situation, and then all the literary and judeo-christian meta aspects of it.

BUT I ALSO NEED TO TALK ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE SO FRICK LET'S JUST START WITH THE OBVIOUS SHIT LIKE THE PLOT AND WHATEVER

Okay, the plot and writing and shit, let's get that out of the way:

The WHOLE Jack-the-Ripper-esque ambiance was just sooooo good man wow like I did not expect the book to take this cold turn but it worked so well. There was such a contrast between Jamie and Cordelia's warm little house and then the cold winter and the stabbings and shit and it felt like a nice little callback to the actual Ripper phenomenon that preceded them and a nod to the Whitechapel Fiend story from Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy.

Bitch OFC that whole thing with Wayland was a set-up like nawww that was too easy to spot and I get why Cordelia feels like shit about it.

Dawg Lucie was just the Among Us imposter here in that my girl was just venting and sneaking around with dead people and I was like nooooo girl run, don't deal with Fade this is a set-up THINK ABOUT JULES LUCIE THAT'S LIKE YO GREAT-GRANDSON *sobs* but yeah anyway my girl has death powers she gonna kill some bitches next book.

You see that confrontation between Lilith and Belial? MASTERPIECE DIALOGUE like this was the point within which I was just like "yo is this the book of Genesis or a YA Fantasy novel" like when Lilith said "I may have been cast out but I did not fall" like??????????????????? I YELLED she did not have to END Belial like that. What a bad bitch.

More on Lilith and Belial... "You, who brought nations into darkness? Shall I finally be able to tell the infernal realms you have gone mad, lost even the image of the Creator." HAHAHHAHAHA SHE SAID "YO BELIAL GO GET SOME THERAPY AND GET OFF MY ASS" LIKE??????

Ughhhh yasss Clare has improved writing diverse characters in this book compared to in The Dark Artifices in my opinion... I'm not gonna expand on it cus ain't nobody got time for that but like, I enjoyed how she wove Persian poetry and tales into the story and the way in which she writes Cordelia and Alistair. They're not caricatures of Persian people but rather multi-faceted beings who also happen to be Persian and I appreciate that. Also, Alistair and Thomas and Anna and Ariadne were just so fun and interesting to read as coupbles but also as individuals. She really higlighted diversity in a very natural manner. All I need is a hijabi character and I’ll die a happy woman lmao.

The level of META man like the references to Classics and art (I swear, she might have compared Matthew to angels out of Caravaggio AND Rosetti AND Boticelli paintings and I Am Living For It) and just all the quotes from holy books and shit omg I love it here like you really feel catapulted into the time period, she draws reference to external art and philosophy so well and I feel like she upped the notch on it in this book (didn’t know that was possible but it was the prose is BEAUTIFUL, archaic, but not pretentiously so). No, like the characters live in their OWN worlds of literature and art and history in the way we are living in THEIRS. They quote Wilde and Milton while we'll quote Clare. It's awesome.

This is an unusually structuralist take even from me but: I like the way the milieu social of the book, i.e., the high society Edwardian circles and their values, have a direct influence on the plot. James and Cordelia got married because society’s values essentially forced them to, not a demon. Cordelia abandons Jamie at the end of Iron because her shame as a woman in society and fear for her reputation made her, not a demon. Thomas and Alistair can't be together solely because of how Alistair tarnished the reputation of the Fairchilds and Lightwoods by using the horror of infidelity against them. Issues relating to marriage, gender roles, etc, stemming DIRECTLY from the time period rule the sequence of events to the same degree as the epic fantasy aspects (demons, Princes of Hell, the lore itself) do and I LOVE that dear God above.

OKAY THE GOOD SHIT LET US TALK ABOUT CHARACTERS AND SHIPS (N.B. but imma discuss Matthew and the Fairstairs situation separately below this portion):

Alistair's redemption arc: No, cus Alistair's redemption arc is honestly amazing. He really did change and it's not like his betterment as a person was linked to any one heroic deed but rather he simply decided he wanted to be better especially for his family and he decided to become a proper protective son, a caring brother, and an amiable friend. He fully owned up to his Malfoy tendencies and apologized without expecting forgiveness. He shows how he cares in the little ways and omg it's so sweet and tender. I really do want him to love himself now and be embraced by Matthew especially and the rest of the Thieves.

Dawg Lucie and Jesse are so funny to me like it's so hilarious how this girl fell in love with a whole ass ghost that no one else knows about like HHAHA. Are Lucie and Jesse my ult ship ever? Nah, but it's nothing to do with Clare, it's just that their relationship happened pretty quick and feels quite like something epicly romantic that Lucie herself would write. I just like slow burn and friends-to-lovers the most from Clare. To be honest part of me just wanted Lucie to not have a romantic arc all together but like, it's all good, I'm not complaining.

Okay Grace- like yooooooooooo I never hated her yunno. She has been abused and isolated all her life. It's not that she is a bad person, but rather that she does not know what being a person even entails. Can't even say she's a “doll” of a person cus she's never even been pampered like one by her family. I really started understanding her motivations since when they gave us her half-childhood with Jesse. I want better for her but cmon can she REALLY be saved???

GRACE X CHRISTOPHER *pretends to be shocked*... Okay, sometime in the middle of the Dark Artifices series some big brain put together a very thorough family tree of the families and like, it clearly showed that Grace and Christopher got married so like, lmfaooooo, I knew this was coming one way or another, but the journey to this ship is more important than the destination. Like in a way Christopher is such a cute baby lamb that it makes sense he'd end up being immune to her Grace-ness when he's just a cute little Einstein boiii. Like this is just so funny to me cus he's so oblivious to social conventions while she makes the milieu social her entire life so OFC it's gonna work. Like, this is such a worlds-colliding trope like just Give It To Me.

James and Grace - aw mannn Jamie just had me fricking wanting to hit a wall every two seconds cus like yooooooo every single time I think he and Cordelia are gonna stop being emotionally-constipated spouses, Jamie says some kinda shit like "omg me and Daisy are just friends uwu" like DO I NEED TO HIT YOU?????????? See I can't blame him for not slamming the door on Grace's face even tho he totes should- Jamie is so cerebral and kind that even if Grace wasn't using the enchantment on him, I think he would always be soft for her even if it isn't in a romantic way. There's just so much miscommunication cus like he said "Thank God" when she broke off the engagement with Charles and lowkey embraced her but it also wasn't his fault cus it wasn't even romantic BUT OFC IT LOOKED HORRIBLE TO CORDELIA like James literally never told the woman at least once that he loved her so OFC she thought she was back to square one with him dear God above what a mess. Not his fault, but she DID set down one rule for him: don’t cheat with Grace. And yeah even tho he hasn’t properly cheated, it must FEEL horrible to her cus she’s just been enduring the pain of their unrequeted love for so long :((

See imma just say it but if Cordelia thought that James didn't love Grace then she def would have confessed to him about her feelings right but like James, on the other hand, was delaying his own romantic confession cus he was BEING EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED and I can't even say the bracelet was solely to blame cus like my boi was just being so difficult omg I believe he should be lightly spanked by his three parents aka Will, Tessa and Jem *cries*.

Cordelia is such a MOM like she's so mature and stable and her self-preservation instinct? OFF THE CHARTS I love this woman like James definitely treated her well as a hubby but like I JUST WANTED HER TO HAVE CLOSURE ABOUT SOMETHING and boy oh boy she did get that closure she got it good but not from the person she expected in the LEAST *hehe* *pelican screeching*... like Lucie was being sus with the whole ghost business and James was being just, quite a case, dealing with Grace and Belial right and I don't blame them at all for their secrecy and shit but her FATHER DIED and her friends were hiding a lot from her so in a way she turned to Alistair for help but he could only do so much cus of his own pain (she couldn't even talk to her mom cus she's pregnant and she doesn't wanna stress her right) and then there was this emotional block between her and Jamie, Lucie was often absent and conspiring with the dead... the last person remaining was HIM (imma discuss this soon), but yeah my heart just went OUT to her cus she's tryna save herself and her family and she just doesn't know what to do. That's why I love the way her mom told her to stop holding herself back for others and live her own life. Like Cordelia grew on me so much cus in Gold she undoubtedly was a strange Elizabeth Bennet-wallflower hybrid and I... do not usually get attached to wallflowers but in Iron I feel like I finally understood that she was just tryna be unproblematic and self-preserving all along and nottt put her family and friends in a tough situation.... she reminds me of my mom personality-wise so yeah I’m totally rooting for her now that her *situation* in the past seems clearer.

Anna, Thomas and Matthew are such a SQUAD lmfaooooo like united in their gayness they'd be so unstoppable.

Will and Tessa are the most in-love of all the in-loves in this story and I respect that so much.

I lost a year to my life every time the romance between James and Cordelia got cockblocked. Like they were MARRIED and I thought they were gonna at least sleep next to each other at least once BUT NO James couldn't take a hint omg I'm actually gonna eat my fist and sob (but in retrospect, I think this serves a bigger purpose in terms of the narrative structure i.e. the interruption of all the spicy James and Cordelia action serves a bigger purpose which I think brings me to my next section, *exhale*)

Welcome to the Matthew Fairchild Enthusiast Club (this section is me talking out loud; it makes no sense):

bitch.

LISTEN TO ME LISTEN WELL I LOVE THIS BOY SO MUCH IMMA SCREAM I REALLY AM GONNA SCREAM MY FIST IS LITERALLY IN MY MOUTH *BACKFLIPS OFF THE ROOF WITH LANA DEL REY PLAYING*

Okay like where to BEGIN I think the Shadowhunter boy who I'm most attracted to is Julian while the one I love the most is Will but I think I see myself in Matthew the most. Like ever since that first story where the Thieves all met at the Academy then got expelled, I think that I just KNEW Matthew was destined to be epic. Plus the whole Wilde obsession? I’m no libertine myself but I just love his chaos and passion for life.

NO CUS HE'S SO WITTY AND SWEET AND EPIC AND YET SO SECRETIVE AND DEAR GOD ABOVE AHHHHH WILL HE SURPASS JULIAN FOR ME??? Ion even know but this is just sodjsgdwsdygyegydgef

Hear me out but I said after finishing Gold last March that I wanted this book to be Matthew's healing arc right so halfway into the book when I realized that we weren't getting all that good healing arcing I was confused just cus I thought it seemed natural to address all of his alcohol issues and sadness by now. LITTLE DID I KNOW CASSIE WAS SETTING UP A WHOLE OTHER ARC WITH HIM THAT I WOULD HAVE NEVER GUESSED WTH.

At first I thought Matthew didn't have feelings for anyone at all, and if he DID develop feelings unexpectedly, I fricking thought that maybe he's catching feelings for James, if anyone??? I mean, I did have some suspicions about Matthew from the get-go: like he's so secretive and as readers we think we know everything there is to know about him since we were all privy to the truth potion incident in his short story right BUT NO I GOT PLAYED AND I DESERVE IT SO BADDDDDD.

Listen I hadn't shipped him and Cordelia simply because I never thought it in the realm of possibility but it MAKES SENSE as a ship... think about it: he never says what he feels, he flirts with her like he does with EVERYONE, he is kind to her in the way he is with EVERYONE. Really, Matthew is shippable with everyone, doesn’t matter if they’re taken cus that’s just what his Matthewnes allows for ya feel. There is such a beautiful irony that CORDELIA herself did not see this coming. Even the little teasers and hints in Gold have only NOW started making sense to me likejhss. I just felt like the hints in book 1 did not indicate to me that Matthew really harbored real romantic feelings for Daisy. I thought he was upset that James and Cordelia were being fakes, not a developing CRUSH on the woman fgs.

Not to mention that you usually sense a ship building when the emotional connection or sexual tension between the characters is made clearer but to me their FRIENDSHIP grew right but it didn’t feel like Cordelia was thought that she liked him or he liked her so that means me and Cordelia are clowns *together* 😤

Okay I was lowkey having SUSPICIONS but I immediately shut them down right... like firstly when he took her to the White Horse in his car and she went OFF and OFF and off about how she felt free for the first time? I thought Cassie was just tryna develop Cordelia's self-liberation arc through Matthew there. Heck, I didn't even think ANYTHING of it when Matthew confession to Cordelia about the "truth potion" incident at all cus I was like they're FRIENDS??? BUT now it's adding up now...

See when they were at the inn place and he was telling her that she doesn't in the least seem like a 100 year-old married woman? I was like hmmmm he's so sweet but why did Cassie phrase it like that like??? When Cordelia later reiterated that she thought Matthew's flirting was “meaningless”?? I was like hmmm kinda SUS tho. And then when he and James had their fight over the way Jamie kissed Grace like again I thought he was just like? ion know? mad at James for it but I didn't think he was in LOVE with Cordelia??? So I immediately put aside my slight suspicions. The probability that he had a crush on James at that point seemed more likely to me.

BUT THEN it started hitting me that every time Matthew drank, even before he explained his issue with the truth potion, that Cordelia would note it, she would worry about him, she would think of her father which seemed so poetic to me, history repeating itself and all that but this time you can FIX it??? Yeah, but again I didn't think the L WORD would be involved man???

Now imma sound like a delulu shipper here but it just makes sense they would develop feelings logically- reason being that it definitely is possible based on the way Cassie set up the story, like there's a combination of little “friend things” that can turn this into a proper ship: Matthew rescues Cordelia in the ballroom when Grace captures James' attention in Gold. Cordelia sees her father in Matthew all the time but knows now she has a chance to be there for him in the way she couldn't have been there for Elias (classic “history repeats itself” trope, she doesn't want Matthew drinking in Paris like dhshghdfhdhch). Cordelia tastes freedom for the first time when driving with Matthew. Matthew caught James and Cordelia making out in the room and was pissed but not even HE properly knew why then??? Umm, when she thinks James is forreal cheating with Grace on her she subconsciously goes to Matthew??? I also found it funny just how every intimate marital moment between her and James got interrupted somehow. Like, it's as if the narrative is just a living force REFUSING to let James and Cordelia as a ship be consecrated. Heck, every time Matthew is scantily clothed Cordelia notes it. LITTLE CRUMBS I TELL YOU LITTLE CRUMBS.

I tell you when Cordelia showed up to Matthew's flat I thought they were gonna f*ck as friends but I got SOMETHING EVEN BETTER SOMEHOW

THEY ARE GOING TO PARIS LA BELLE EPOQUE PARIS THE PARIS OF DREAMS AND ART LIKE??? FRICKKKKK I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING AT ALLLL MAN? I deadass thought the story would be restrained to the UK but like it MAKES SENSE the trope subversion MAKES SENSE.

“In Paris, with you, I will not need to forget.” SHITTRGEGGGDG

BUT CORDELIA LOVES JAMES TOO LIKE I CAN'T DENY THAT... where are we GOING with this like Matthew wouldn't lie about his feelings and yet Cassie wouldn't give us Matthew and Cordelia crumbs to only end it in the next book immediately for her to just ditch him for James. I mean she was clearly holding back on fleshing out James and Cordelia as a ship for this but to WHAT END??? Daisy feels wild and free with Matthew and she feels warm at home warm with James. I can’t advocate for the sinking of ANY ship here.

Imma say what we're all thinking: Is she gonna give us a Will x Jem x Tessa type situation where Cordelia gets both of them cus I'm not strong enough for this but I also think it'd be really funny if James gets a surprise bi awakening in the next books and then we get POLY even tho this would never happen, it’s actually impossible, because of the whole parabatai thing.

Listen I ship Cordelia and Matthew much more than Cordelia and James, not that I dislike James in any way tho. It's just: Matthew is so unrestrained and she's so composed. They seem like an unlikely pair so it makes sense that they hit harder for me. James and Cordelia have such similar personalities but I ALSO don't ship James with Grace at all so like?? Poly would be... ideal... but it can’t happen especially cus they are fricking parabatai... a Will-Jem-Tessa situation seems more likely but mannnn ion know what to expect. I just want FAIRSTAIRS to have their moment in Paris. I mean James and Matthew clearly don't abhor each other for this.

Take everything I say with several grains of salt, take everything I say with the whole Dead Sea actually, cus I damn well know that Matthew is so flirty and whatnot that I’d have shipped him with anyone in their little circle but now that she set him up with Cordelia it all feels so right?? I have wanted this man in a good relationship since he walked onto the page in Nothing But Shadows so-

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I can't believe Cassia duped me like this omg, Matthew is gonna have his healing arc in Paris with Cordelia by his side like- THIS IS ALL I HAVE WANTED AND SO MUCH MORE. Question to yall btw: are you all as surpised at Fairstairs as me or did yall see it coming all along like smart people? Am I a lone clown? 🥺

BRUH okay criticisms of CC?:

Lmfao a part of me feels like I GOTTA say something bad about CC or the book but honestly I have no objective complaints about it as of now. Am I saying that it’s the PEAK of Young Adult literature and Urban Fantasy? I mean, I make no such claims tbh. I’m not here to be critical when I read as a hobby and when CC’s writing makes me happy regardless of how flawed some people see it.

Okay what next?

So like I’m excited for the adult high fantasy she’s releasing in the fall and whatever other works she might be releasing outside of Chain of Gold within the Chronicles.

As for TLH itself? Man I’m just VIBING like I suspect I will reread Chain of Iron soon and maybe one of the anthologies just because I am happy that this series actually happened after me waiting like 6 years for it when it was just a concept: a Dickensian retelling filled with poetry and culture and history and the conventions I so loved in TID at age 12. This is all I been wanting tbh. I’m just enjoying watching this series come to fruition for it to inspire and transform me in some way. I feel like in a way my coming-of-age aligns with that of these specific characters yet I ALSO feel like I raised Jamie since infancy. Wack.

MATTHEW AND CORDELIA IN FRANCE LA BELLE EPOQUE TO BE EXACT IMMA CRY I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING AND AHHHHHH. ALSO WILL AND JAMIE GOING TO CORNWALL TO GET LUCIE AND MAYBE BOND I LOVE WILL. HE WAS ONE OF MY DILF AWAKENINGS AT AGE 12 AND NOW HE’S HERE AGAIN IMMA CRY. I WANNA SEE MATTHEW GET HAPPY. AHHH.

Ending with a fun quote: “In the wise words of someone or other, there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Maurice.” 😉

[yeojaa]

catch up tag game!

taking a page out of the lovely @latetaektalk​‘s book because i am shameless yeehaw 🤡 ty for the tag, darling linh! other people have also tagged me but uh, uhhhhh... i lose track of notifications

tagging:  @underthejoon​ @snackhobi​ @cutechim​ @flytomyjoon​ @taeken-my-heart​ @bangtanfancamp​ @xjoonchildx​ @ttttaehyungie​ @jinpanman​ @coepiteamare​ @1kook​ @jungkxook​ though idk who has been tagged and who hasn’t so oops if this is a duplicate. if anyone would like to be tagged in this though, just lmk and i’ll add you 👁👄👁 

tag game one: fic writers ask game

which new trope would you like to try writing?

fake relationship! i’m actually surprised i’ve never written it before...

which trope do you want to write again?

idiots to lovers bc that’s lidorally all i write anyway!

which draft are you most excited to post?

nine to five hahahdsahdahdsadasjdklasldjkl 

is there any new genre you want to explore?

i want to try my hand at something sci-fi/fantasy but my imagination is legitimate garbage 😅

do you have a favorite line in any of your drafts up to now?

You’d been unable to keep your amusement at bay, laughter spilling between your teeth.  Something about Taehyung had reminded you of a freshman in college, soft and not yet made cynical by the hell of school.  (It was an apt enough comparison.  He was a baby-faced junior associate, soul still intact.)  “I know.”

For whatever reason, he’d been surprised, brows sliding higher into his curls, eyes widening.  “You do?”  

“I know everything about you, Kim Taehyung.”  

It’d been a joke then - something you’d said in the moment.  How funny how true it’d become.

have you decided on any creative goals for 2021?

write more. write better. finish more wips that i start lmao

describe your journey on this blog last year in three words! and three more words for what you hope for 2021!

2020:  totally life-changing (ik this is technically two but idc)

2021:  somehow even better

tag game two: 10 songs, 10 people

rules: you can tell a lot about a person from the type of music they listen to. put your favorite playlist on shuffle and list the first ten songs. then tag ten people. no skipping!

go go - bts

what about you - ravi, ailee

serendipity - bts

never ever - the rubens, sarah

you are the one - epik high, horan

then - gaho, villain 

crying out - d.o.

holding on - dabin, lowell

broken glass - sabai, merseh

action! - dpr live, gray

tag game three: this or that

indoor plants or gardens // cloud-watching or star-gazing // water or fire // paperback or hardcover // running or hiking // sleeping with socks or without socks // fruit or vegetables // hanging plants or succulents // dark wood or light wood // handwritten or typed // instagram or pinterest // braids or pigtails // dc or marvel // books or movies // oceans or meadows // forests or fields // sweet or salty // ice cream or chocolate // hoodies or sweaters // long hair or short hair // piercings or tattoos // summer or winter // boots or sneakers // cars or motorcycles // curls or straight hair // castles or cottages // sunny days or storms // reptiles or birds // disney or nickelodeon // strawberries or watermelon // essays or posters // phones or laptops // glass or stone // dark or light // photos or paintings // circuses or theatres // reading or writing // dogs or cats // poetry or novels // monsters or ghosts // thrift shops or libraries // fiction or non-fiction

tag game four: ten biases tag

rules: write down your top 10 biases and answer the following questions

jeon jungkook

kim taehyung

christian yu

lee gahyeon

park jimin

hwang hyunjin

min yoongi

kim seokjin

kim namjoon

jung hoseok

1. between 1 and 4 who would you rather kiss?

jaykay. is that even a question?

2. between 2 and 7 who would be your best friend?

probably yoongi. i think we’d understand each other a bit better, even as much as i love tae

3. between 5 and 10 who has the better voice?

chim. sorry, hoseokie

4. between 1 and 8 who is the funniest?

oh god. this is hard. jin is a true comedian tho lol

5. between 6 and 9 who would you date?

joonie. we could hike 🤠

6. between 9 and 10, who would you do a collaboration with?

probably joon?

7. between 4 and 8 who is the best dancer?

... both... this is hard

8. between 3 and 5 who would you most likely marry?

jimin. double libra goodness duh

9. between 1 and 7 who would you nurse when they are sick?

... jk. i feel like yoongi could take care of himself lmao

10. between 2 and 3 who has the better smile?

taeeeee. sry

11. between 6 and 8 who would you vacation with?

jin ez

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #441

“all alone, he turns to stone while holding his breath after death  /  terrified of what’s inside, to save his life he crawls like a worm from a bird”

Have you ever watched a movie in class/school that made you cry? Yep, a few. What’s the earliest you could go to bed at night and feel okay about? If I'm having a really bad day, I can tolerate as early as 7:00. :x What is you favorite type of lunch meat? Honey ham, probably. What time of the year do you dislike the most? Summer is disgusting. It's too hot, too humid, too many bugs, and I just hate it. Do you put ketchup on your scrambled eggs? No, that sounds gross. What is your favorite color to wear? b l a c k Are you an overachiever? Oh, hunny. What physical feature do you wish you had (i.e. freckles, curly hair)? Maybe uhhhh big eyes. What fictional character (i.e. Bambi, Scarlette O'hara) would you marry? Darkiplier bc he is merely a misunderstood soft boi. How long have you gone without shaving (girls- legs, armpits; boys- faces)? Legs: It's been nearly a year. Pits: not that long, considering I shave them every time I get in the shower. What is the meanest thing you have ever said to someone else? I'm sure it would be something in one of the letters I sent Jason. Or Dad. Idk. Did you ever go through a phase where you wrote bad poetry? The phase never ended lmao. What is your favorite thing about your life? My loved ones. Save all the animals that die during road kill or save 1 human from a fire? Sorry, but I'm picking the animals. Have you ever painted a picture of somebody? Yes. How many real bfs/gfs have you had? Two. Did you enjoy your past relationships? Yes. Except for when I was with Tyler. Name a comedy that you like. White Chicks. Could you wait until marriage for sex? Yeah. What’s the best Nirvana song? I'm not sure, really... Maybe "Drain You?" What was the last thing that impressed you? No clue. When was the last time you were in a pet store? Several months ago when I went in to get more rats for Venus. What nationality is your last name? Irish. What’s your favorite kind of chips and dip? Plain, rippled Lays in French onion dip. Who was the last boy that you saw cry? I don't know, actually. It may have been Sara's dad, which was years ago. Does your mom know you do surveys? I mean no, it's not like it's come up in conversation. Have you ever had a serious injury? When I was a kid, there was this one time I was running down the road with my friend, and I tripped; I was a fast runner, so I skinned the everliving FUCK out of my knees to the point there was even pus. I was SOBBING, and it took weeks to heal; I had the scars for years. What was the last thing you achieved? Losing weight at the gymmmm. Staying dedicated to going. Would you enjoy being famous? No. I couldn't take all the eyes on me and even ONE person's negative judgment. What’s under your bed? A big box of my art supplies. Do you enjoy travelling? Yeah. I wish I could do it more. Have you ever belonged to a club? If so, what was it? No. When was the last time you drank strawberry milk? Not since I first tried it at elementary school. It was absolutely disgusting. Have you ever managed to collect all the fast food toys in a set? I doubt it. Do you have a clock in your room? No. Did you have a good driver’s ED teacher? No. If I'd listened to him while driving, I could've gotten myself killed while merging onto the highway. People are assholes and didn't want to move over. Which of Britney Spears’ songs is your favorite? Probably "Freakshow." Does mind over matter work for you? Not usually, no. Are you paranoid? Oh yes. What is the best thing about winter? Everything!!! Literally the only BAD thing about winter is the dry skin/lips. I love the cold, Christmas and all that comes with it, the decor, hot chocolate, snow, getting all cuddly... Everything. :') Have you ever been truly in love? Absolutely. Are you currently planning a trip? No. A trip to Illinois is just a wish right now. How many plants are in your home? None, I think? What is your favorite possession? Excluding my pets (because I don't like calling them "possessions"), probably my laptop. Have you ever felt like you were too nice and way too often overlooked? I have before, yes. What movies have tripped you out? Off the top of my head, the only entertainment media in general that has ever truly "tripped me out" was the first time I played the Silent Hill game. The movie didn't affect me to that level because I already understood the concept. When I watched Jason play it for the first time, I was SO confused and just blown away by the concept that I did loads of research and just thinking about it all. That franchise is just cool as shit, okay. Did you rollerblade as a kid? Do you still rollerblade? I LOVED rollerblading. I haven't done it in years, though. Would you ever settle into a relationship that wasn’t right for you? Do you know friends who are in relationships just so they have someone to sleep with at night? NO. I will NOT settle. Being genuinely in love with my partner is too important to me for me to ever do so. I don't know if any of my friends are in that situation. Would you take a dirty picture of yourself for someone you are dating? With my current body? FUCK no. If I was happy with my body, the answer is still probably no. I'm too self-conscious and awkward with that kind of stuff, and besides, I really don't think I want a picture like that to exist of myself to avoid potential trouble. Do you use earplugs or a sleeping mask when you sleep? No. What summertime treats do you love? We have this local slushy place that is FUCKING BOMB. It may sound basic, but they have SUCH a vast variety of flavors and goodies you can top it with that it's truly just so amazing. How picky are you when it comes to choosing who to kiss or not kiss? I am VERY picky. I have to be really interested in you. Save for how things were with Tyler... I just felt like I was supposed to. What do you hate most about moving? I. Hate. The process. Of moving. It is just so, so stressful to me. I have a very hard time confronting big tasks, and that's exactly what packing and unpacking entails. Do you feel that having sex anywhere but a bed is more exciting? Not necessarily. Do you drink 5 hour energy drinks or any other kinds of energy drinks? No. Has anyone ever whistled at you? I don't think so. Do you like scarves? No. Is your father homophobic? Possibly. I don't actually know. I honestly don't think he took Sara's and my relationship seriously, so that may be a sign. Do you take gummy vitamins? The only vitamin I take now is vitamin D, which isn't a gummy. Have you ever applied make-up on a guy, for any reason at all? Ha, yeah. I gave Jason a makeover once. Who would you like to meet before you die? MARK. I am so determined, alsdjfkaj;wek;rj. I just want to hug him and say thank you and ugly-cry. If your dream was to be a model, and a big opportunity came up, but you had to be nude, would you take it? No. Even if I had the body of a model. What’s the most ridiculous conspiracy theory you’ve ever heard of? The fuckin' flat earth theory, probably. If Heaven and Hell exists, where you going when you die? Well, considering I have an, uh, very negative opinion of the Christian god... Who is the person that you are afraid of losing, above everyone else? My mom. The day she passes is a day I am inexplicably horrified of. What is one thing that pisses you off pretty much everyday? My life. If there anyone you know that you feel should consider therapy? My mom really could use it. Do you like any of the songs on Twilight, or the actual movie/saga itself? I love "Supermassive Black Hole" by Muse, but idk if it was actually written for the movie. How old was the first person you kissed? He was 18 when we first kissed. Will you be a strict parent one day? I never want to be a parent. If I hypothetically became one, I don't think I'd be strict, necessarily, but very protective. Last person to stand up for you? Probably Mom, idk. Have you been to a baby shower? Yeah, a few. Who were you with the last time you went to the movie theater? My dad. What’s your favorite high school memory? Just... a lot with Jason. Do you like relationships, or do you prefer to be single? I prefer being in a (healthy) relationship, but I won't get into one just for the sake of having one. What is one adventurous thing you’d be willing to do? Hmmm... scuba-dive, maybe? What subject at school did you absolutely hate? Math. Italian food or Chinese food? Italian. I don't really like (most) Chinese food. Do you like to make flash cards when you study? I rarely did that. Has anyone ever told you that you’re a good singer? Yes, somehow. Do you ever watch TED talks, live or online? No. I dare you to write the name of a person you strongly dislike. Ashley. What do you think about Marilyn Manson? He's one of my favorite musical artists, but he's a disgusting dick personally. Biggest trouble you’ve ever gotten into at school? Nothing, really. I was a very well-behaved kid. Do you own one of those “professional” DSLR cameras? Yeah, I have a Canon. Does it bother you when you see a 6th grader with a bunch of gadgets? No. Did you buy yearbooks every year in high school, or did you not bother? Not every year, but most. Do you have Restless Legs Syndrome? No. Jalapeños: yay or nay? I loooove them. Did you ever play Minecraft? Nah. My niece is getting into it. Did you ever have a Club Penguin account? Were you a member? I did have one. I wasn't one of those premium members or anything like that; I just had a basic account. Do you know anyone that seems to not have any common sense? Bitch me. It's extremely embarrassing. I 100% got it from my dad. What do you think is the biggest injustice that was ever done to you? The manner through which Jason broke up with me. It left me traumatized. What type of person angers you the most? Abusive people that think only they matter and have no consideration for how their actions affect other people. If you could change your appearance, how would you alter it? I'd lose a shitload of weight, for one. My teeth would be whiter, my eyes bigger and bluer, I'd want my hair colored/able to hold color far better, I'd lighten and lessen my body hair, make my skin clearer, thin my eyebrows... I'd change a lot. What are your feelings on feminism? MANDATORY. Absolutely necessary in a misogynistic society. However, I do believe some people take it way too far to a point it is anti-man and puts women on a holy pedestal. It is about equality. Describe your first relationship? Perfect, until it wasn't. Describe your last relationship? Wonderful and healthy, but distance and our health were issues at the time. Can you honestly say that you always practice safe sex? My history with sex is confusing and complicated and I really don't know. Why do you think your most favorite film touches you so deeply? Thinking about it... it's probably because of how Simba runs from his problems and bad memories, but returns to confront them and is victorious. That's how I want to be. What do you want people you meet for the first time to think about you? That I'm nice and clearly sincerely cared about them and their feelings. Do you feel protective over someone? My sisters, nieces and nephews, Sara... What perfume/cologne do you wear? It's called "Blush." Where did your vehicle come from? I don't have my own, but Mom's came from a girl at the dance studio. She ran into a deer, and the front got fucked up, but the sweetheart paid to fix it up to being operable so Mom had her own car. The front bumper is kept intact with zip ties and duct tape, but hey... it works and has for many, many years now, lol. What was the color of the bridesmaid dresses of the last wedding you went to? Ummmm... I actually don't remember. What is your favorite way to eat chicken? As tenders, probably. It is your birthday. You hope the cake is: Red velvet. This year for my bday, our controlling-as-fuck family friend bought me my birthday cake without consulting ANYBODY, and I was so fucking annoyed. It was a very kind gesture, yes, but um, can I have a say, please? What do you wear to bed? Usually men's pj pants and a tank top. What were you doing at 8pm last night? Sleeping, actually. I was extremely tired and went to bed early.

[your-ace-cousin-clover]

hey, this one's gonna be long, so grab a chair and a snack.

first of all i wanna say thanks for the poetry recommendations! (I'll keep the anti-love poems and postcard from the heartbreak hotel in my back pocket, just in case...) always glad to expand my to-read list! :))

moving on: to be honest, no, i haven't read a lot of eastern poetry - mostly due to my past conviction of "reading translations sucks". but i've read translations of some arabic poems recently and there's sort of a melancholy that sneaks up with it? see, my grandfather on my dad's side is iraqi, but my dad never taught me arabic, so i'm always partly grieving a hypothetical what-could've-been.

anyway, i've checked out some stuff by tagore (& darwish)!

on tagore: i read "gitanjali 35" & loved the line "Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake." feels like a dam bursting open. i rly enjoyed "crossing 16" and "on the seashore" too! idk, but it feels like the last line in tagore's poems is the first breath you take after you finish running a mile? does that make sense?

on darwish: i especially liked passport & he is quiet and so am i! darwish seems like a very storyteller-ish kinda poet? and i like the rhythm of his writing; it's very.... alive? like if i stare at it too long it'll blink.

also, i gotta agree with you on ginsberg! i love, love, love vivid poetry and i used to really want to study film - because writing seemed (to me at least) like it lacked the visual aspect?

to answer your question about siken: you are jeff definitely hits hard, but i think planet of love might be my favorite. it's hard to pick just one, but something about the director/actor dynamic really speaks to me. the certainty of "you know your lines" & "you've memorized it" juxtaposed with the general sense of uncertainty throughout the poem feels very real? its choppy, the sentences are short, "there's a gun in your hand. it feels hot. it feels oily." there's a gun in your hand and each sentence is a bullet wound. and the way it ends! it builds and builds and builds suspense but there's no resolution, it's just tense. it asks whats next? and never answers the question. it just hits the brakes - suddenly you're rigid and frozen in time. it's being trapped in a fraction of a second and "everyone's watching, everyone's curious, everyone's holding their breath." and i didn't always like it, but somewhere along the line i started having panic attacks and it REALLY grew on me lmao

this ask is getting long, so i'm gonna end it here, but thanks again!

P.S.: would you maybe be up for giving me a poetry prompt? i could send you the poem in another ask. (might be fun)

-cat

Cat! :)

First of all, I want to complement your style of describing things. It's so poetic. Tagore like "the first breath you take after you finish running a mile" and Darwish like "very storyteller-ish kinda poet and rhythm of his writing; it's very.... alive". AGHHH, I squealed reading those lines, like what???? That is so fucking raw (Sorry for cursing, but ahhhh). You are poet in the way you just like talk about things.

Also, quick side note, I'm glad that the poems are in your back pocket. Hope you never have to turn to them, due to their nature, but if you ever do, I hope they help.

I'm glad you like Darwish and Tagore. "My father led my country awake" always punches me in the gut. It's so strong and emotive. I sympathise with you about the language barrier. I suck at speaking languages other than English, but I'm not a native english speaker. So even I want to enjoy poetry in languages than English, I have to read the translations which puts a damper on it. But, God bless translations, I love the way you described it in your last post that makes them seem so pure and the fact that someone weighted all these words to convey a human emotion across a pages and across ages is just.. mwah.

Ginsberg is my shit. (Again sorry!) The openings lines of Howl hit my Christian Iconography Yearning, like the vivid imagery..? "angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night," I vibe with that feeling of wanting to reach divinity and holiness with your writing. The raw, exposed nerve of that writing.

And before like I got heavy into poetry, I also felt the same way about how 2d writing can be. But, then you have things that help transcend the page like : slam poetry or hybrid forms which combine writing with more dynamism like choreopoetry. But even within itself, poetry transcends the page, by drawing out emotion and just speaking to you. This was a piece I read a while ago that has performances online and is very acclaimed : "For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide / When the Rainbow Is Enuf." (Although it deals with very heavy topics though so heavy tw)

And I read Planet of Love! The abrupt way it ends just hits you so strongly and absolutely leaves you frozen. Have you read "Wishbone" or "A Primer for Small Weird Loves"? Both hit very strongly as well.

And I'd absolutely love to give you a prompt: "Saint Valentines". Does that work?

[And don't worry about long asks, they are funny to read through and answer :)))) ]

Look forward to hearing from you and reading the poem! Prompt poetry is pretty fun!

[peirates]

‘Did the Romans and ancient Greeks ... ?’

Google autocomplete is a gem and a curse. Inspired by @todayintokyo’s post on questions about Japan, I thought I’d have a look at what people are asking about Rome and classical Greece and, wow...

Christmas holidays leave a lot of time for milling around, so I’ll answer them in case anyone’s interested. (Please forgive me if any of this is incorrect/incoherent, it’s nearly 11pm as I’m writing this lol)

Did the Romans speak Latin?

Yes, Latin was Rome’s (and the Roman Empire’s) official language! Of course, many Romans or foreigners in Rome spoke other languages for the sake of communication, trade and education - Greek was particularly popular among the nobility - but Latin was what they all had in common.

Did the Romans invade Scotland?

Long story short, no. They tried, failed, and built Hadrian’s Wall to keep the ‘barbarian’ Gaels out - southern Britain was already too cold and muddy for the temperate Romans, not much point in losing more lives over more mud. 

(Hadrian’s Wall was what inspired Game of Thrones’ The Wall, as confirmed by G.R.R. Martin himself, but Hadrian’s was nowhere near as high, thick or long.)

Did the Romans have glass?

Absolutely! In fact, their skill with it was much more artistic and masterful than the average glassmaker today, just search ‘roman glassware’ here on Tumblr or on Google images to see what I mean.

Did the Romans invent concrete?

Yep! It’s famed for its durability, which is due to its contents of volcanic ash (Pompeii flashbacks), lime and seawater. The seawater reacted with the ash over time to give it its strength and anti-cracking nature.

In fact, the Roman method was so effective that it lasts for far longer than modern concrete (modernity/Westernisation =/= progression, it seems) and scientists today are trying to find ways to revitalise it.

Did the Romans eat pizza? / Did the Romans eat pasta?

Sadly not, only later Italians did. Their empire deserved to crumble for not inventing either smh.

Did the Romans invade Britain? / Did the Romans invade England?

They did indeed in AD 43 under Emperor Claudius, and they only began to withdraw in the late 300s when the city of Rome was being threatened by a Germanic tribe called the Visigoths.

Did the Romans invade Ireland?

No. Even now, archaeologists have no idea to what extent they communicated or even knew of each other.

Did the Romans celebrate Christmas?

Emperor Constantine only began converting the empire to Christianity from AD 313 (they had been pagan previously), and the earliest evidence we have of Romans celebrating Christmas was in 336 AD, very late in Roman history. Throughout most of Roman history, therefore, no they did not celebrate Christmas.

(They did have a festival which was similarly important and similarly timed (mid-December) called the Saturnalia. It also involved communal partying, gift exchanges and a general spirit of liberty (e.g. slaves could order around and punish their masters) - it was one of the most anticipated festivals of the Roman calendar. However, the purpose was very different: it was to worship the pagan god Saturn, the father of god-king Jupiter and the previous ruler of the world before its occupation by humanity. Namely, the festival marked a return to the ancient ‘Golden Age’ in which nature was dominant, peaceful and uncorrupted.)

Did ancient Greece have emperors? / Did ancient Greece have kings?

No emperors, traditionally Greece was comprised of city-states ruled by kings (or theoretically by the dēmos, the people, if you were Athens). Under Roman occupation it did answer to Rome’s leaders (consuls, then later emperors), but the idea of emperors was much more late-Roman than Greek.

Did ancient Greece celebrate Christmas?

Nope. It was originally pagan and did not celebrate any Christian holidays until a) it was conquered by Rome b) Rome later converted to Christianity, thus enforcing it on the rest of the empire. However, this conversion point was so long after the ‘heroic’ and ‘classical’ periods of Greece that by the time it did become mostly Christian, it was no longer ‘ancient Greece’ in the same sense.

Did ancient Greece have electricity?

Y’all are asking the real questions out here, that’s for sure lmao. 

Nope, electricity wasn’t used anywhere as a power source until Thomas Edison’s studies about two thousand years later.

God though, a good ol’ GPS would have saved Odysseus a lot of trouble.

Did ancient Greece and Rome overlap?

Oh, nelly...

Greece predated Rome by at nearly a thousand years, but Greece’s and Rome’s histories together lasted for centuries, even before the latter conquered the former. It’s why they are studied together as one field of academia. Many Italian settlements were in fact Greek colonies. Classical Greek helped shape Latin. Much of Roman religion was inspired by that of the Greeks. Many Greeks could speak Latin and many Romans could speak Greek. Roman art, philosophy and architecture was particularly fascinated by that which was Greek - to put it in meme format, the crab is Roman culture and the crocodile is Greek culture. And these are just the absolute basics, entire tomes have been written on Greece’s and Rome’s somewhat symbiotic relationship.

TLDR hell yes they did.

Did ancient Greece have a flag? / Did ancient Greece have a constitution?

Nah. Although history often refers to Greece as one country, one culture, it was more a collection of independent city-states with their own identities and constitutions. 

They all had three things in common: religion (+ the moral/social codes which came along with it), language, and (in most cases) enemies from abroad -  therefore in later centuries, as well as their city-based nationalities, they did all call themselves the Hellenes. If you were a fellow Hellenic, you’d be able to work and live in other Greek cities with less trouble than if you were to try, say, in a ‘barbarian’ land such as Persia. Greeks were civilised; everyone else was an uncultured brute. Hence, their sense of unity was more from fear of the outside, from xenophobia, than from internal harmony.

Because of this, there was never an altogether complete sense of assimilation. Different cities had distinct dialects, favoured different gods/cults within the wider Pantheon, often warred against each other (especially Athens and Sparta, whew), fed their own specific cultures and law-sets and reputations. Nationality and citizenship in that age were not really about country or region, the world was just too small for that. You wouldn’t say ‘Hi I’m Phoebe and I’m Greek’, you’d say ‘Hi I’m Phoebe and I’m from the city of Halicarnassus.’ The closest analogy I can really think of is the cities in the dystopian series, Mortal Engines.

So no, they didn’t have a single flag or constitution. There was just not enough unity between them all.

Did ancient Greece trade?

Initially I was going to wave this off as a silly question because ‘hurr durr everyone trades’ but ACTUALLY. 

Along with the rest of the eastern Mediterranean, Greece had its own Dark Ages between the fall of its early society (aka Mycenaean Greece) and the rise of Homeric-style poetry and culture, i.e. between the 1100s and 700s BC. Communication in general was absolutely awful: there were no great armies, no great cultural progressions, and yes, no substantial trade. The fact that Greece was then feeling down in the dumps also discouraged foreign trade. 

It took the bard Homer’s influence to get people to start thinking, creating, travelling and thus mass-trading again - this sudden surge in activity eventually led to Greece’s Classical Period, i.e. 4th century BC, you’ll probably imagine gleaming Athenian pillars. Increased thinking and culture led to increased politics/nationalism, increased p/n led to increased warring and military action, increased warring improved transport and communication, and WHOOSH suddenly trade took off.

So basically, Mycenaean Greek trade was good (as far as we can tell), Dark Ages Greek trade was shocking, Classical Greek trade was quite literally revolutionary.

Did ancient Greece have lions?

Yep! However, they weren’t like the sub-Saharan lions you’re probably imagining right now - those are Panthera leo, but the Eurasian lions that would have been in Greece were Panthera spelaea.

Nevertheless there were indeed lions and they played a huge role in Greek mythology and literature. The Nemean Lion was the first of Hercules’ Twelve Labours; Homer, the trendsetting legendary lad that he was, created a trope of comparing something innocent and vulnerable to something vicious and savage and desperate by using the analogy of a lamb and a hungry lion.

Did ancient Greece have a democracy?

Nope, only one city named Athens did. Don’t get me wrong, it was at the time and still is a big deal considering it hadn’t been done before, BUT there are three important things to note:

It was ONLY Athens which had a democracy - every other Greek city kept their kingships.

The Athenian democracy wasn’t what we’d call democracy. Only free, Athenian-on-both-sides men could vote and participate in local politics - this left out all slaves, all women (even if they were Athenian), and all foreigners or residents of foreign descent (no longer how long you and your family had lived in and worked in and contributed to the city and community).

It wasn’t foolproof considering it eventually got overthrown by power-seeking tyrants.

i.e. a part of ancient Greece had a democracy.

[hexcaught]

it’s  been  𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧  𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬  since  the  𝐦𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧  wizard,  𝐄𝐃𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐃  '𝐓𝐄𝐃'  𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐊𝐒  was  sorted  into  𝐬𝐥𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧  upon  arriving  at  hogwarts.  i  suppose  over  the  years  we’ve  learnt  that  he  is  𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜,  𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐭,  𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞  &  𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐟𝐮𝐥,  i  guess  that’s  why  they  were  sorted  where  they  were.  (  𝑐𝘩𝑎𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑒  𝑟𝑜𝑤𝑒.  )

𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  !

boy  forgotten:  oil  on  canvas.  a  remnant  of  softness  in  a  practice-makes-perfect  chrysalis.  snake  skin,  muggle  blood.  a  threadbare  jacket  worn  as  armour,  polished  veneer  marred  only  by  that  chip  on  your  shoulder.  tongue  fluent  in  loopholes  and  sharp  as  sin.  wind-chapped  knuckles  smoothed  by  herbal  lotion,  wind-chapped  lips  sweetened  by  honey  and  apple.  sea  glass  worn  smooth,  turned  over  and  over  in  your  pocket.  black  tea  past  midnight.  cold  fingers,  warm  eyes,  and  a  quicksilver  smile.  the  smoke  of  a  candle  blown  out.  a  skeptic’s  wish.  a  study  in  dichotomy:  are  you  the  wolf,  my  dear,  or  are  you  his  prey  ?  fingers  stained  with  newspaper  ink,  the  first  thawing  of  spring  ice,  and  hand-me-down  hope  you  haven’t  quite  taught  yourself  to  forget.

𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈  𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓  !

i.  NFWMB  -  hozier.

ii.  COLD  BLOOD  -  bruno  major.

from  the  moment  edward  tonks  was  born,  he  was  ted.  just  ted.  it  suited  him  better,  the  scrawny  premature  baby  that  he  was,  born  into  a  family  not  made  of  money,  but  something  that  was  equal  parts  desperation  and  love.  there  was  no  glory  or  glamour  to  the  tonks  name,  merely  a  cramped  apartment  in  dublin  with  windows  that  looked  onto  smokestacks  and  old  churches.

ted’s  family  didn’t  have  much,  and  they  had  even  less  when  his  dad  left  their  family  when  ted  was  only  ten  for  a  woman  he’d  been  seeing  on  the  side

suffice  to  say  ted  doesn’t  like  his  father  very  much.

so  his  mother  was  left  working  double  shifts  bagging  groceries  at  tesco  to  try  and  provide  for  ted  &  his  younger  sister  nora  (  five  years  younger  than  ted  so  she  was  five  when  their  dad  left,  and  sixteen  now  ),  and  ted  helped  out  as  much  as  he  could

he  didn’t  grow  up  in  a  super  wealthy  part  of  dublin,  and  so  his  elementary  school  was  underfunded  and  understaffed,  the  teachers  overworked  and  the  students  unmotivated,  but  ted  was  the  kid  who  everyone  expected  to  make  something  of  himself.

he  was  creative,  and  idealistic,  and  not  yet  burdened  by  the  weight  of  the  world,  and  he  dreamed  of  becoming  a  writer.  he  wrote  with  abandon  and  passion  and  drive.  creative  short  stories,  thoughtful  op-ed  pieces,  tongue-in-cheek  poetry,  drawing  inspiration  from  the  most  unlikely  of  places.  he  actually  got  some  of  his  work  published  in  a  young  authors  collection  !

and  then  his  dad  left,  and  then  hogwarts  happened,  and  as  quickly  as  ted  learned  what  the  wizarding  world  was,  he  learned  what  it  meant  to  be  a  muggleborn  in  the  wizarding  world.  especially  a  lower  income  muggleborn.  especially  a  lower  income  muggleborn  slytherin.  and  he  stopped  writing  as  much.

he  kept  his  head  high  though,  proud  and  stubborn  as  fuck,  and  kept  his  hand-me-down  uniform  impeccably  ironed  and  washed  and  folded  neatly  in  his  drawer.  and  although  he  might  have  felt  out  of  place  in  slytherin  at  first,  there’s  no  other  place  he  could  be.  he  is  ambitious  and  clever  and  self-preserving  and  resourceful  and  competitive  and  charming  and  ruthless  and  family-oriented.

and  when  he  got  prefect,  he  wore  that  badge  with  pride  on  top  of  his  slytherin  robes.  takes  no  shit  but  does  no  harm.  he  especially  keeps  an  eye  out  for  the  few  other  slytherin  muggleborns  at  hogwarts.  

but  for  that  matter,  he’s  considerate  and  warm  but  like  …  he  won’t  go  out  of  his  way  to  stand  up  for  muggleborn  rights  or  anything.  it’s  that  Politics  Mood  where  no  matter  what  he  does,  it  never  seems  to  make  a  difference.  so  in  typical  slytherin  fashion  he’s  just  focusing  on  himself  now,  aiming  to  get  a  cushy  job  in  the  ministry  and  support  his  

he’s  a  little  bit  over-focused  on  money  but  that’s  what  happens  when  you  don’t  grow  up  with  it.  like  he’d  absolutely  take  a  lucrative  but  boring  job  he  doesn’t  like  over  a  poorly  paying  job  he  loves  (  right  now  at  least  ).  he’s  cynical  like  that.  gone  are  the  dreams  of  becoming  a  writer,  ted  wants  those  galleonsss

some  more  random  stuff:

lawful  neutral  in  the  most  slytherin  way  possible.  this  boy  knows  how  to  find  loopholes

capricorn  sun  cancer  moon:  aka  tough  on  the  outside,  soft  and  gooey  on  the  inside.  

likes  tea  but  not  coffee

jewish  !  don’t  get  him  started  on  how  hogwarts  only  has  breaks  for  the  christian  holidays  lmao

[glittertimes]

So today's free weekly poetry workshop is on "visual poetics" and adding a visual element to your poetry. One of the people who runs the workshop is the first person to learn to read & write in his family, so he feels it's important to add a visual component to his writing to make it more accessible.

And I'm thinking about how often intelligence is really just linked to social norms. Like how immigrants with accented English are seen as less intelligent, or neurodivergent folks and people with mental health issues are often percieved as less intelligent.

My mom argues that there are many forms of intelligence like art, and music, because she's always kind of left out from conversations of intelligence bc she's not a STEM person, even though she had perfect pitch when she was younger. (And she has accented english and still struggles to understand english sometimes so people make her feel bad bc of it).

Like I'm an artist and I really like reading and analyzing things, but people percieve me as less intelligent bc I have trauma issues and don't like talking much.

And as a kid I just refused to interact with people who didn't "get me" lol. Like my parents forced me to go to church and I would just hide in their office and not talk to people bc they were homophobic and misogynistic and thought I talked about books too much lol! (They were also super nosy and always asked me weird questions to figure out what was "wrong" with me. A little advice white christians: Fix your bigoted beliefs and white entitlement and then I might actually talk to you lmao).

But anyway, the point is I wanna write a poem about perception and seeing yourself through multiple points of view all the time. It's like John Burger's "self-objectification" idea only it intensifies the more marginalized identities you have lol!

[historia-vitae-magistras]

The 19th century is basically a shoujo drama and Kiku is the protagonist: Prussia and Japan have a very close linked history together, so much so that Japan adapted the German Civil law system into it's legal system. European, especially French painters adored Japanese art styles and adapted them in their own paintings to create the Japanonism art movement. Kiku basically could pick an choose.

Agreed! He's got the whole world in his pocket! And Kiku sampled. Monogamy, in my opinion, isn't how nations function in general. Kiku has deep ties and emotional attachments to a lot of countries. I just really like romantic relationships where I'm mostly looking at respect and mutual benefit with these eldritch dirt fucks and the Dutch fill that need lmao. Fuckng bastards.

The Dutch are shockingly loyal, and this cultural trust seems to have built up even after the end of Sakoku. Linguistically, Japanese dictionaries preferred Dutch over English loan words right up until post-WW2. In Nagasaki, the Dutch are seen constantly in the architecture and food culture. It's fascinating how we've discovered an English linguistic bias in sources. When we compensate for this, history decentralizes Britain and America for us and reveals a Japan whose ties, especially to the west, are much more complicated than the Anglosphere. Even after taking several courses on Japanese history over my university years, I found so much about Korea, Japan, Germany, Italy, France, Taiwan, Australia, etc. But the Dutch stands out to me. Physically Kiku's land is more formed by Dutch work than American or British. Water management, harbours, bridges, canals, drainage, agriculture reforms, erosion management. And these things started centuries ago and are still going.

And the art! Ah! The French and Japonisme... some art that makes me highly uncomfortable. La Japonaise is some of the least egregious but holy mother of orientalism. Monet's bridges are much more respectful. Van Gogh's works are primarily in that category. Starry Night was directly inspired by Katsushika Hokusai’s The Great Wave off Kanagawa. Upon the birth of his nephew in the Spring of 1890, Van Gogh painted his famous Almond Blossoms, also inspired by Japanese nature prints. For Jan who would have grown up a medieval Christian, those almond blossoms would have as much significance as the sakura in Japan and I really do think there's at least a copy of it above their bed at some point. The first Dutch ship that crashlanded in Japan did so in April 1600. The entire relationship is 400 years of everything spring comes with

The Dutch gave Japan its first modern ship, the Kankō Maru. The Dutch Monarch and diplomatic corps write love letters, make super emotional speeches, and show affection for Japan in their official statements. Kiku might be slightly more reticent in his public affection, but I don't think it's any less profound. He built an entire replica of a Dutch city that is the largest in the country. Huis Ten Bosch is literally larger than Tokyo Disneyland. Idk, man; there's just a lot here that makes me emotional. Like, look at this piece from the poetry Basho, as translated by Jane Reichhold.

kapitan mo tsukubawase keri kimi go haru

even the captain bows down before the lord of spring

[twistedwonderlandimagines]

Hey guys do you remember Cleverbot? If you don’t know about it, it’s supposed to be an AI program to have conversations with...

I’m gonna let Cleverbot come up with some headcanons about the characters.

And I’m gonna share them here. (Obviously not gonna affect my writing later. This is just a joke.) 

Riddle Rosehearts: He can recite the first nine numbers of pi, his favorite song is “We Are Young,” his favorite band is The Smiths, and he is Jesus. (RIDDLE IS JESUS LMAO) Ace Trappola: He writes poetry, he loves people, he hates it when you change the subject, he hates *squints at computer screen* fishberries (what are fishberries), and apparently he’s a fish. Deuce Spade: He doesn’t know me (no shit CB), he’s a feminist, and he’s going to find me. (CB going straight up yandere I see.) Trey Clover: His favorite color is black, he’s going out dancing tomorrow, he’s rude, and he’s not a ginger. (Very deep stuff.) Cater Diamond: He hates cats (WHY-), he doesn’t mind dogs, he likes computers, and he’s dating someone (WHO CB? Give me the details! ...I asked and apparently it’s some dude named Logan.)

Azul Ashengrotto: He doesn’t feel anything, he’s a fan of BTS, he doesn’t believe in love at first sight (hey, that’s actually a good one), and apparently he’s a sassy bitch. Floyd Leech: He will do anything in exchange for a chocolate bar, his favorite colors are purple and pastel pink, his favorite video game is Majora’s Mask, and... Well, CB started telling me facts about the Christian God, so I guess it thinks Floyd is a god. Jade Leech: He’s a human (duh CB), he’s haunted by the ghosts of his bad decisions (CB what the-), and he hunts deviants (if you have a deviantart account, RUN).

Kalim Al-Asim: He likes vocaloid. He loves music, reading, singing and video games. He also likes turtles and he can play the piano. Jamil Viper: Apparently CB tortured him (LITERALLY I just asked “Can you share information on Jamil Viper?” and CB said, “I tortured him”), he’s learning Spanish, and he lost his driver’s license.

Vil Schoenheit: Apparently he’s Slenderman. That’s all it would tell me. Epel Felmier: He doesn’t want to lose me (*shrug* yeah okay), he got arrested “the moment the song came out” (I asked what song and it said it didn’t know), and he’s in middle school. Rook Hunt: He loves me (yikes) but we can’t be a thing (THANK THE GODS), he will still be my friend, he’s emotional, and he’s fun to talk to.

Idia Shroud: He’s fine (like feeling fine or he’s fine? Idk CB didn’t say), he knows nothing about the illuminati, he has five tattoos, and English is his favorite subject. Ortho Shroud: He knows what food tastes like (...So Ortho can eat despite being a robot?), he thinks I’m kind and beautiful (Aw), and he cheats on exams (*GASP*).

Leona Kingscholar: He doesn’t want kids, he’s literally on fire (NOOOOO), like Azul he doesn’t believe in love at first sight, and his favorite color is green. Ruggie Bucchi: He’s sad, he’s a fan of Misha Collins, and he loves cheese but only with blue raspberry (yeah, that sounds like Ruggie). Jack Howl: He feels isolated, I can have him (thanks CB), and he’s faster than me.

Malleus Draconia: He loves knock knock jokes... And now CB is insisting that I’m Malleus. Guess I’m the Dragon Fairy now. Lilia Vanrouge: He likes Shiva the destroyer god from Hindu mythology, his favorite animal is a lynx, and he had a cat named Lunch that died. (LILIA HOLY HELL- I couldn’t have written a better headcanon about Lilia myself!) Silver: He’s a loner, he’s in love with chocolate (same), and he likes mac and cheese. Sebek Zigvolt: He went to the store and bought tools... And now CB just keeps trying to flirt with me. Lovely.

[goldstevn-blog]

In my mind I am eloquent; I can climb intricate scaffolds of words to reach the highest cathedral ceilings and paint my thoughts. But when I open my mouth, everything collapses.   

 ⌠ MARGARET QUALLEY, 19, CIS-WOMAN, SHE/HER ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, RILEY HAYES-GOLDSTEIN! according to their records, they’re a FIRST year, specializing in UNDECIDED; and they DID NOT go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of ROLLING SPLIFFS ON YOUR FAVORITE BOOKS & COMICS, RUNNING ‘TIL YOU’RE OUT OF BREATH, A MESSY ROOM/A MESSY BED/A MESSY HEAD, A MEME FOLDER MORE EXTENSIVE THAN PICS OF FAMILY & FRIENDS. when it’s the VIRGO’s birthday on 8/31, they always request their MATZOH BALL SOUP from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. ⌿ jinx, 24, she/they, pst ⍀

CHARACTER PARALLELS: Daria ( Daria ), Seth Cohen ( The OC ), Veronica Sawyer( Heathers ), Ron Swanson/Ben Wyatt ( Parks & Rec ), Quentin Coldwater ( The Magicians ), Pam Beasley ( The Office ), Zari Tomaz ( Legends of Tomorrow ), Nadine ( Edge of Seventeen ), Lindsay Weir ( Freaks and Geeks )

PINTREST: [ x ] PLAYLIST: [ x ] 

LIKES & INTERESTS: Cult Classics - Movies ( Heathers, Dead Poets Society, Sixteen Candles, Ferris Buellers Day Off, Cruel Intentions, The Breakfast Club, Almost Famous ), Blue raspberry Slushies, Donuts, Judaism, Arctic Monkeys, Lana Del Rey, The Strokes, The Smiths, the color blue, writing poetry, e. e. cummings, art museums, greek mythology, rmemes, Rolling joints on her favorite books, biblical mythology, astronomy, astrology ( she finds it very entertaining in a mocking way and would never admit there’s a small part of her that enjoys it ), Star Wars, black cats, black cats named Boggart, black nail polish, tattoos, carnivals, comic books, ferris wheels, puns, the sea, jellyfish, NPR every morning, going to the beach at twilight, 4 am drives, 5am runs, spliff.

POSITIVE TRAITS: Observant, Cooperative, Strategic, Witty, Intelligent, Resilient, Morally Responsible, Loyal.

NEGATIVE TRAITS: Reserved, Pessimistic, Sardonic, Secretive, Curious ( it will get her into trouble ), Awkward, Suspicious.

tw: mentions of parental abandonment

When you meet Riley Goldstein, a picturesque childhood in a picturesque suburbia in Virginia is not what you would expect and yet it was exactly what she had. Born on the cusp of summer and fall, Rachel and Christopher were over the moon to have their daughter, Riley Hayes, born on August 31, 2000. Finally, a child to complete the perfect family unit. Maybe they had hoped for a boy despite what science said ( hence the name Riley & a full name for a boy they had prepared ) but, they had a daughter and for the first ten years of her life they pampered her greatly. Trips to the coast every summer to visit his side of the family where Riley was praised for being such a pretty, good girl, and what seemed like infinite love from her father was doled out as long as she was what he wanted her to be. The younger girl was cooperative, it was in her nature it seemed, because she loved seeing her parents happy with each other. As long as Riley stayed within the lines, stayed within Christopher’s lines at least, everything would be well. Even when Riley started to develop a few habits and interests that were off the wall, he brushed them aside as childhood obsessions. Never could he accept his family for what they were which is exactly why he left.

The ugly truth was, Riley was an accident and the picture painted had been a lie – not that Riley knew until then. While she knew they had gotten married young she’d never known how much exactly her mother had given up to be with her father. Rachel Hayes had left her family, forsaken her religion ( as Christopher was a very religious Christian man ), and moved from New York City into this suburbia all with the promise of a family. When Christopher left right before Riley entered middle school, Riley was forced to grow up and pick up the pieces of a broken lost woman who simply couldn’t find herself in the rubble that was the aftermath of her father leaving. 

As it was, Riley lived in a shitty town, full of shitty close minded people, full of shitty stores besides the 7/11 that had the best slushies and there were many days she just felt like total shit. She did her best to not stand out and she didn’t, she was a bit of a loner in school because at a young age she learned people left -- you could only rely on your own company to get you by. Riley became in engrossed in books, poetry, online communities, she became hungry for a life outside of her town but had no clue how to get there. When the time came to apply to colleges, she freaked out and decided that she was going to take a year off. Her self esteem couldn’t currently handle the rejections from colleges she had dreamed of attending ( though, Riley would’ve gotten in to a few had she tried -- that was the problem -- Riley didn’t often try out of fear ). For a year, she’d work, she’d be involved in her temple hours away in Bethesda when she got the chance, she’d live her life one day at a time while she figured out what to do with her life. She wasn’t special, she didn’t have any skills -- or so she thought. 

Why was Riley picked for Gallagher Academy? She was never the brightest at her school ( at least her grades didn’t show it, though her perfect SAT scores did ), she was never the most athletic ( despite going on runs everyday ), she was never the best at anything but there she was -- at college for people who were all gifted. Truthfully, she’s overwhelmed, she’s cautious, she’s scared, but sometimes she looks around and maybe thinks this might’ve been where she was meant to be. Riley is the perfect spy because she knows how to be invisible, she watches people, when she’s not trying to drown her brain in alcohol, weed or cigarettes, she’s sharp and is able to point out trends, her journals and diaries full of notes about people, how they tick, their little quirks, her observations. You’re able to forget she’s there and she’s able handle herself in high stress situations when it comes down to it. Gallagher Academy saw a girl who COULD reach her potential but didn’t know how, they saw a nobody with barely any family or friends who they could mold, they saw a girl who needed the right push to be someone great. Her biggest hurdle? How she sees herself, how she views the world and her place in it. 

LIL THINGS

riley’s aesthetic is if lana del rey and weird al yankovic had a baby!

loves water

her judaism is extremely important to her, i have detailed hcs about it if you wanna ask but her favorite holiday is yom kippur which is NOT a happy holiday 

i’ve been toying with her future and what she could do and honestly i could see riley in both research + development, mcguyver survival skills or drivers ed!! 

deals with depression and GAD!! i imagine she’s been in and out of therapy, but i could see her going into it properly once school started via the school to help her out?? 

is trying to find a balance between rambling and being monosyllabic LMAO like sis is not the best at carrying convos like the social skills DEFINITELY need some work despite being really good at reading and observing people 

writes and writes and writes and WRITES, writes poetry sure, but often writes about what she sees, who she sees, what is going on with her, her emotions, the world around her, you can always find her with her journal scribbling something 

extremely sardonic, her humor can be very subtle 

changed her name to riley hayes-goldstein, to honor her mother’s side of the family. she wanted to get rid of the hayes completely but something just made her?? tack on the name instead of remove it

did track and field in school and was honestly REALLY good at long distance running, could’ve been the best, but she just didnt want that kind of recognition or attention 

if you wanna plot please like this and i’ll come to you!! 

[hesallin]

i dont usually do these, but i just hit 100 followers, and i thought maybe some of you might wanna know a little bit about me!!!

tagged by two of my favorite pals, @goodnightfall and @smarterest

name: my god given, christian name is actually sarah, but pretty much everyone on the internet calls me dizzy! feel free to gift me with a horrible nickname, i love those

nickname: i guess i already answered this! i seem to collect shitty nicknames though, so some people call me christmas, some people call me sans (NO!!!! relation to the undertale character you gremlins!!)

gender: female!

star sign: im a scorpio!!

height: 5'5. i am pleasantly average

time: it is 7:08 here in good ol ohio

favorite bands: i dont really listen to bands that much?? im a Theatre Kid™ so mostly just like..... soundtracks but i really like sleeping at last!! also, i keep hearing walk the moon songs i love!

favorite solo artists: hmm. i think i like calum scott a lot?? every time i hear a song of his i like it. sam smith has put out a few things on the radio i like. aah, im not very good at this, im sorry!

song stuck in my head: the fucking. plagues song from prince of egypt. i sent the pestilence and plAGUE UNTO YOUR-

last movie i watched: good question. i go to the movie so much i can never remember!! black panther maybe?

last show i watched: B99 THEY JUST PUT A NEW EP OUT YESTERDAY

when did i create my blog: three weeks ago maybe?? exactly the day i wrote my first fic!!!

last thing i googled: canned bread. dont ask

do i have another blog: yes, several!! this is a sideblog, actually, so youll notice all my notifs come from a different place. my main is mostly just for my poetry

do i get asks: absolutely never but to be fair this is a very new blog!! lots of people just waltz right up to my messages, which makes me weep, i love making friends. youre absolutely free to send me asks though id love to talk to you!! even if its just on anon

why i chose my url: wish i could say theres some deep and beautiful meaning but its just the words "hes all in". felt like that.... really summed up stony, i always really liked that

following: oh my god so many

followers: just hit my first hundred on this blog!! im so excited i could cry!!!!

average hour of sleep: like ten. i go to bed at 9 on school nights lmao. i need a lot of sleep

lucky numbers: hmm. i really like seven, but i dont know if its lucky!

instruments: i play the viola and a little bit of piano. im super musical, but mostly i just sing!!!

what im wearing: LMAO. a yellow adidas jacket, black adidas track pants, and nike shoes because i am whatever the female equivalent of a fuckboy is.

dream job: im gonna be an actor! im a senior in high school, and im going to wku for theatre next year, and im so excited!! its kind of..... my Whole Entire Life, lmao. writing is just something i like to do between rehearsals and stuff!!

dream trip: im going to paris this summer and ive been waiting my entire life so as you can imagine i am. so happy i could burst

fav food: BUBBLE TEA

nationality: american!!

favorite song right now: hm. ive been binging 25th annual putnam county spelling bee right now, which is a musical about... the 25th annual putnam county spelling me lmao! i keep playing "i speak six languages" on repeat, haha

sexuality: im bi!

hogwarts house: proud slytherin

favorite animal: cats!!!

why you got a blog: to meet all of you!!!! ive been reading your work and seeing your posts and gazing upon your glorious art for so long, i wanted to contribute something to the fandom and have a space to share everyone elses ridiculously wonderful stuff!!!! and im just. so remarkably glad i have

i just realized how remarkably long this is, so ill stop here. sorry to anyone who had to scroll past this monster!!

tagging some of the loveliest people: @bardingbeedle @peggycarterrrr @starsandsupernovae @sunnyzhp22 @goodmorningbeloved @ishipallthings @xtaticpearlsblog @arachnaboy @coldnerdytrash