#Chinatown ice cream shirt

[mcforwhatiam]

For the 20th anniversary of To the 5 Boroughs, sharing a photoset from the tour in Manchester, UK, taken in December 2004 by Jenny Lewis.

Sorry for the markings/blur in places, it's the best I could get on these.

[alientitty]

wearing this shirt rn i love it so much. this cute dragon is eating ice cream and he was designed by kids at after school program 🥺 also the ice cream is bomb i go there just about every time im in chinatown even when it's like 40 degrees out

[mcforwhatiam]

Found this shot on Instagram of Jamie Billett (BB camera operator during the Pageant tour- he's the one dressed as a clown here). Taken at Hip Hop Honors awards in 2004

And the crop cuz I can't resist

Found on Mic to Mic blog

[channel-z]

Dear Covy

I lost my brilliant friend and collaborator Covy Holland this week. I’m trying to work through a strange and difficult grief process that’s only beginning, so I’ve decided to write him a letter. If you knew Covy, I hope reading it can help you a bit out too. If you didn’t know Covy, I’m really sorry that you didn’t get to meet him, because he was the absolute best, and I hope you get to know him a bit through this letter. Trigger Warning: allusion to suicide.

Hello my friend,

I want to start this letter by telling you that I am so unbelievably sad that you have left us. You were such a joy to so many and were so, so loved. You leave this Earth with all of us proud of you and so much better to have known you.

I remember meeting you for the first time. When was that? 8, 9, even 10 years ago?? You were so excited that Shannon and I had come to Calgary to run workshops and have fun with all of you. You struck me immediately as such an engaged learner. You were so excited to pick up what Shannon and I were laying down. You had a youthful energy about you and a puckish spryness. I only remembered this week after hearing of your death that we're the same age. You always struck me as a bit younger because you always had so much energy.

What followed was one of the truly great pleasures of my life: getting to see you grow as an improviser and find your voice. You were always playful, but it was amazing to see your work get deeper, sometimes serious, sometimes wonderfully surreal.

You truly did the work, Covy, and we are all so much better for it. I'll miss your willingness to help me develop new shows, like APT 33, and your desire to "go there" whenever I was in town to try new things. I'll miss the weird onstage bits: the ones that didn't go so well and those that killed, like when you wore what felt like infinite shirts onstage to take them off one by one only to have the last shirt be one with holes for the nipples. I don't know if I'll ever really understand why that bit worked as well as it did, but it had something to do with your execution, for sure.

It was wonderful to see you grow so much during the time I knew you, Covy. I am so honored you and Stephen asked me to direct you for those several days in the summer of 2017. Now that you're gone, I cherish the time I spent with you and Stephen in that small rehearsal room, thinking of new ideas and ways to play together.

You were so generous with your time, input, energy, and love for us. We all know this. You were one of my biggest financial supporters when I used to fundraise for Story Pirates. Because of you, so many kids got to experience our creative writing and performance programs who otherwise would not have. This is part of your legacy, and I don't want it to be forgotten.

Remember that wonderful day when you and Cassie came to see me do a Story Pirates show in NYC? After, we walked several miles down Manhattan, laughing and chattering the entire way. It is such a happy memory for me. You just made so many people happy. It's so much about how you chose to live your life. We ended that day getting ice cream and Chinatown Ice Cream Factory. I went there yesterday and ate some ice cream and thought about you. I am in no way surprised that ice cream made its way into some of the stories that your family and friends told at your memorial today.

The day before I heard the terrible that you left us, a bird flew into the bakery where I work. At first, it casually flew in when I was at the front of the store, perched on our front counter, gave me a look, and flew right out. But it came back several hours later and caused a big fuss, which felt very much like you heightening an improv scene in a funny and strange way, and it took a lot of effort for us to shoo it out of the store. There was an element to it that was a little risky and part of it that was fun. Sort of like being on stage with you. Knowing what I know now about the connection that you had to nature, I'd like to believe that was you coming to visit me one last time and say goodbye.

I'm heartbroken that you're gone, Covy. Of course, there's no way to truly understand why you had to leave all of us now. I hope there's an aspect of you that's lighter now and free of what was ailing you. You have left all of us to carry the weight of your absence. It's a challenge that we are up for, but one that I don't look forward to. There are heart-shaped holes in all of the lapels of our jackets where there once were fanciful felt hearts instead. We're all going to have to learn how to keep going, day by day, in this new reality where the holes in our lapels are always there.

I will try to think of you and celebrate your spirit in small and big ways. You made such a huge impact, Covy. I truly believe that one day we'll meet again and there we'll be: in a room, with a stage and some folding chairs, and there will be much laughter and play. But until then, I'll miss you, my friend. And I'll remember you.

[twentyminutemiso]

Below is pasted from notes on September 2022 Los Angeles trip:

Dish soap Big water Cleanser Wound wash Towel Cash More milk Toilet roll £7

Shirley’s ihg number 430953641

Extraordinary attourney wu - netflix Mr queen

Go pocha Jay jay gastropub Studio city Venice canals Halloween horror night universal

G eazy no limit 1975 and gods plan in shirleys car

Poopourri Botanical curtain Fluffy pink headgear Verbena handwash Goldfish tank

Prawn ceviche Oyster shot Eggy cream with cinnamon Amanda’s eyes are red and watering because someone’s chopping onions

Do you wanna see my garage A tiny pink set with a pink bar and pink glasses on it A cockroach with cowboy boots She hands me a pair of inline skates, do you know how to rollerskate?

Amanda’s eyes are still watering Bo makes angie and cesar a sandwich each and he makes me a sub with a banana and cheese and orange slices in it Angie has stomach cramps and doesnt want to come to goodwill

A tiny light blue grandma dress with doilies on it for amanda but it’s for children Phil collins playing in goodwill

Does bo want to get ice cream. Pumpkin pie flavor. Lemon flavour for amanda. We’re dropping off jade how long until we get there? 3 minutes 1 2 3 we’re not there yet. No you have to count to 60 three times. Where’s my road it’s the left or the right i forget. Two okay signs in the sunshine

Los alcos plaza Melrose avenue Go rollerskating at the beach with amanda

Ben and joyce at the korean restaurant. Ben’s english but he tells me he’s really thrown by an asian person with an english accent. He also met a french chinese person recently and that blew his mind too. Joyce is a pretty korean american with her hair dyed light brown. She swears kookily and calls you bitch in not a completely authentic way.

Velvet sofas. A pair of bears reading in bed.

A crack in the window in the shower ktown. Sunny yellow building roofs palm trees satellite dishes.

Cool burger place chinatown vinyl flooring hipsters in window lots of picture frames breakfast sandwich restaurant called amboys

Older guy purple hat check shirt camo pants dog boombox hanging in right hand playing street fame waking kinda hunched

John chamberlain and larry bell The first foam contorted bodies the other mirrored glass cubes “west coast minimalism”. A small foam like a conch shell.

Mika rottenbeeg. A tractor plows the ground close up thundering. Gelatine tubes candy coloured slicing oddly satisfying. Plop. Water steams off metal surface. Tubes slap slap slap slap poke poke. Salt salt. Rotating hexagons like a gear turning. hun mming like a didgeridoo back of the space shuttle. Mongolian throat singers. Pink candyfloss melts red on the metal like bloody goo. Red outfit on mongolian. Kind of like educational childrens videos

Ppl browsing a 2 dollar store

Interactive sculptures ponytail flicks and plants go up and down and LED light grows cress

An eighties powersuited woman with a blow dry opens doors through liminal colourblocked office rooms and a soap bubble quivers and dips

Ppl in boujie gallery understand the british water request

Mazda miama

You owe shirley twenty for the dinner

My phone number 6263713004

Art picks me from a dark creepy san marino street. Most expensive place in all of LA, you can’t get away from crime anywhere.

capital_a_la Thursday Sunset rooftop - say art’s name Sunday - boardwalk venice beach Friday South central

Everyone wants to be friends here

Aiyi hands me a persimmon while I’m zooming. I leave the desk. We eat jujubes, crisp and bright white inside, green skins. and a chilled avocado and the persimmon skinned and quartered. I was peeling it and she said i was being wasteful so she peels it instead. She gives me an apple from costco.

I’m so excited that ive driven myself to cvs i feel untouchable. Is this self actualisation

Steve Lacy plays again on Kiss on the way to Paru’s place.

Get to Paru’s place, bart simpson pinata. Books. Sitting on the tatami. Little pea chips, a rice cake with kiwis and blueberries and coconut. Peanuts, small bowls set down gently from a tray. Water (with ice!!!). Paru plays us two songs, ones a space vibe, beepy with guitars that their mentor put over the top. Their voice is really good. Making bao with clay. Drying from the lacquer. They laugh say it seems to be the dumb creative phase they’re currently going through.

Tora i

At the art show. Hard seltzer. Very cute bartender boy with braces. Gives me apologetic smiles every time I ask for something because they don’t have it. We see Jem inside with her friend, Austin, a Korean fashion design boy who works for Levi’s she’s met 2 days ago at Byredo where she works. They went swimming at his hotel pool and today they went to a Nike party and Austin was the only one not wearing Nike. Jason comes to meet us because he has a crush on Jem and it only takes him like 5 minutes to get there. 30 dollar pizzas and we eat it family style. A pappardelle with ragu and I love it. Austin flirts with me and i’m technically flirting back cos I keep smelling his wrist, until I get slightly uncomfortable and then I’m trying to angle my body towards Paru. He’s a little more drunk than everyone else and has a rich international boy aura.

We’re in Virgil village. Jason and Paru realise they’re barely two blocks away from each other. You see that duplex? I’m on the left one. We pass a taco place that’s just been trying to start up. Paru wants to see what’s up with Jason and Jem and he should text her if he has some thoughts and he says let us know if we’re going to her show on Sunday.

Guangchangwu and fantuan and soy milk in garvey park. Kiki doesn’t make noise. She’s a quiet baby. Shirley says rubbing Kiki’s belly.

LACA

22.50 ramen

Root beer cheese burger lemon wedge with my ice tea.

Go utah its crazy

Four storey high fountains in echo park. Man fishing and ellaella says it’s like putting down a community lot in the sims and the townies come. Woman unbuttoning shirt and puts hubbys hand onto her breast and she’s gripping his arm. Lotus flowers on the corner of the pond.

Things i read at heavy manners Sunday in the park with boys - jane mai - depressed schoolgirl comic. Drawings of objects for titles. Bartkira. Steps and colors in the outer sunset (sf)

Passing by the heavy petting woman

Cotton on jungle park jc penney forever 21 macy’s.  Fashion nova store

An angel called osh at the tattoo store.

Nina molloy paints a copper koi on a panoramic ghostly blue canvas in a sheer green square pond with copper lily pads. Tidawikney lek’s napping girl in on the sofa with creeping hands and flower prints on the sofa and real flowers and a tiny island in the sunset through the balcony door and palm trees because i’m in LA. Dominique fongs orange deep dea diver in swampy water with many limbs holding vines catching fish but is she a statue covered in life spearing some fish. Bambou gili ghostly diners with summer rolls duck dark space.

Peach and black tea kombucha in a millenial brewery venture

Aunty brings a handful of pineapple guavas. Talking in the kitchen about taiwan, not liking tourism but liking driving around america because of the freedom, doing 100 miles stretches at a time and feeling relieved to see a petrol station, visiting a friend in colorado, going to yellowstone with her friend, not finding a hotel, deciding to go camping instead

Boba photoshoots at the library, Mariah in the car, windy on venice beach. Peas and feathery leaves on the street trees. Polly pocket houses. Wearing my rolex and mina rolls down the window and does a cheesy british radio announcer voice. Doja. 70s cinema and cringe rubbish bin act.

The red lion tavern. Cigarette vending machine. The smiths to die by your side. Green box of american spirit menthols. Never seen straights

Owe felix 50 for the baseball tix

Coffee Water Butter Bread Oil Batteries

Mina making blueberry pancakes. Gecko on the tree stump.

On the tram ella says it feels like when they go to westworld, getting off its like entering scientologist hq. Tinkling and euphoric music like the sims. Cy twombly exhibtion. Greek god names scratched into paint and written with oil pastels with urgency. A carnivalesque painting by belgian charles ensor and a guy has a chode face. Kampoinge. Three children long shadows on a new york street turned 90 so their shadows are vertical. Watching a video of rye crawling in the garden in edmonton while im looking at art.

… Who sanctions this violent dismemberment- Reaps the barren, crusty smell of denial- Archaeological masks, drums, look clumsily On museum walls

Hung twisted awestruck Witness to this absurdity

Louis Draper Camera magazine july 1966

Ballroom neon lights at the urban outfitters in downtown. Car trunk table for dining in the pa ord parking lot.

Eames house. Fittonia? Purple leaves with green edging. Mina notices.

Traffic loud on the road by santa monica. Three helicopters and we look up at each one. Teenage boys ask mina for squad pics. Three angles a serious one and a silly one and squatting. Purple building lights coming back from the toilet. An apartment block like a covent garden soup.

Pier. Cheesy guitar players. Northern chinese family with camping chairs fishing off the end of the pier. One mad one with four rods. Lettering man bumping guangchangwu tunes. Rasping aero smith in rusty’s bar.

Smokey robinson then dangelo cruising. Picking up ella’s hoodie from LA apparel the most gta scene yet.

At Watts Towers whose construction materials include ten thousand sea shells. 99ft cos city hall was 100ft. Simon loved hearts. Sankofas as well. Four year old girl sundress in gaps between white chairs still sunny. Kouman kele west African dance company

Outside seven eleven getting white claw for our night out, two chinese bros scratching their scratchcard on the car bonnet.

Dodgers, walking from top deck to centrefield because they had to put the bags away. Felix and nadia. Luke had to run to theater rehearsal. Didnt get my hotdog. Steward with a colourful beaded necklace tells me i’m not shy.

One piece playing on the tv in the japanese restaurant we went to pee in when me and mina are walking from the bus we got from Night+Market, to Felix’s. Hello kitty lipbalm in family mart.

Mina photoshopping me and ella into a picture of the beach, ella giving opinion

At the huntington library exhibition olde english vibes and ella says i love it when the letter s is the f. Square japanese courtyard garden bonsais around the perimeter. Wooden hut. Wooden bridge over the creek slosh slosh moss rocks glimmering. So many different biomes we’ve enjoyed today ella says it looks like legend of zelda. Sitting down on concrete bench and ella bobs around taking different angles of the Japanese gardens and saying wtf.

Beautiful multicoloured tins of coffee trader joes.

Kylie can’t get you out of my head in the sunset.  I love you wittle turtle boy everybody goes slow. <3 theres holes in the los angeles life. Pizza and bagels and sleet. (Not that much grass) bonnie tyler. Cant fight this feeling while driving in the night.Tacos at the place near Luke’s. Later on, I find out from Mina that they are discussing how our date is going and Felix is looking at Luke on find my friends and laughing because Luke’s getting tacos next to their house (assuming they are alone)

Karen on kost fm extremely lovely and sentimental.

Sad on the Flyaway, tired but trying to keep my eyes open so i make the most of this place. Palm trees and cars cruising on the freeway next to me always cars and the flyaway is the fastest. Aircon blasting.

Piccadilly back to the ends.  Listen to clairo to heal the pain. The west london terraces are okay. Memories of car journeys and bar conversations swirling. Kind of beautiful to notice the place you live even if you’re sad.

Fawziyah posts a story about unrelaxing into city life. ‘Being present is the meeting point between holding on and letting go’

[yespolkadotkitty]

Long Way to Go - Chapter 1

Ryan Brenner x OFC, Grace Lin

THANKYOU so much to @the-blind-assassin-12 for casting an eye over this and for friendship and enthusiasm and thankyou to @suchatinyinfinity and @something-tofightfor for being so friendly!

W/C: 1550 ~ Warnings: None? General audiences.

-----

It was hot as hell.

Sweat trickled down the back of my neck as I checked the thermometer in the pastry display case. Melted cream cakes didn’t sell, and I had to keep the served-cold meat bao from spoiling, but at least the fortune cookies, red bean cakes and mochi would be good for hours.

People bustled past, some holding mini electric fans, others cooling themselves with tall iced drinks from the nearby Starbucks.

I took a deep drink from my water bottle. I’d topped up the ice cubes just ten minutes ago and they were already just a memory.

The two girls I employed cleaned tables, their hair scooped up out of their faces, chattering about some party they were off to later, and which popular boys would be attending. Their giggling made me feel every one of my thirty-two years.

The overhead fan whirled silently as the bell above the door tinkled musically, letting in a gaggle of teenagers. They kept me busy for the next few minutes, ordering a bunch of fortune cookies and bao, barely looking up from their phones as they paid me.

As one of the teenagers pulled the shop door open, a gasp of music broke my train of thought (mango or green tea cookies tomorrow?). Curious, I peered out of the window.

On the street corner, sitting against the trunk of a large tree planted in the sidewalk, a man played guitar and sang.

His head was down, but thick, dark hair peeked out from under his battered hat, the brim shading his face from view.

His voice was deep and melancholy, and it pulled at something inside me. I kept the door open, listening.

Quite a little crowd had gathered around him. His fingers danced over the guitar strings effortlessly, his low, sultry voice carrying to me on what little there was of a breeze in New York in July.

I got lost in the lyrics for a moment, and must have leaned on the door too hard. The bell tinkled and I had to hang on to avoid falling face first on the pavement.

Smooth, Lin. Real smooth.

Without skipping a beat, the busker glanced my way. His eyes were the very dark brown of expensive Swiss chocolate, concern shining in their depths.

I smiled to let him know I was okay, and his gaze moved over me for a moment. I felt every second. His eyes smiled first, and then as he finished the last note in a line, his lips curved, too, a dimple flashing above his scruffy beard, and oh. I was a goner. He was the most beautiful man I’d seen in a long time, and this was NYC, so that was saying something.

“Hey, Earth to Grace! You gonna stand there all day?”

The Brooklyn twang jerked me back to reality and I blinked, looking into the face of my delivery guy. “Sorry, Mikey.”

The bulky Asian-American grinned, casting a thumb at the busker.  “He’s all right.”

I tore my gaze away again. “He sure is.”

Mikey wheeled his little hand truck to the storeroom and started to unload as I served a young woman who had questions about allergies. She read my ingredients lists and decided on three pork floss buns, the ones hot from the heated plate. Just going near it made me near-recoil with the steam that bathed my face.

As the customer paid and I thanked her, clipping a business card to the paper bag, I glanced out at the busker. He was drinking from a water bottle, his head tipped back to expose the line of his neck. The bottle was near-empty.

“Hey, Kristi?” 

One of the girls I employed stopped mid-chatter to her colleague about someone called Dwayne and how dreamy he looked in a football jersey, and whipped her head round to me.

“Can you man the counter for a sec?”

She bobbed her head yes and we swapped places. I grabbed a bottle of water from the tall fridge by the door, the shaped plastic cold against my palm. I hesitated, then grabbed another.

The wall of heat enveloped me as soon as I stepped out of the door.

The busker looked up at the sound of the bell, shoulders bunching in his worn white t-shirt as I approached, as if steeling himself for something.

The crowd had thinned between songs, people put off from standing by the sheer heat of a New York summer, but the open guitar case held a bundle of notes, some fives and tens, as well as several scatterings of coins.

“Hi,” I greeted him. “Ma’am,” he drawled, softly. His smile seemed easy, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. 

I suspected that he was wondering if I was gearing up to threaten to call the police on his ass. 

I wasn’t.

I held out the bottles of water. “Thought you might be thirsty.”

“Sure am.” He smiled up at me, fingers drumming on his thigh, but he didn’t attempt to take the water. “‘S very kind of you.”

You stepped closer, offering the bottles and he finally took them from me . His hands brushed mine, his skin warm and tan, a little rough. I noticed the unusual ink on his fingers, wanted to ask, but politeness stopped me.

“Your music is beautiful,” I said as he unscrewed the first bottle, the second held between his knees.

“Thank you, ma’am.” He took a deep drink, and I tried not to feel like a letch, admiring the line of his neck, the bob of his Adam’s apple. “‘S a nice bakery you got there.”

“Thanks. I, um, never thought it’d be a thing. You know? When you dream about something for so long and when it finally comes true, you can’t believe it?”

He met my gaze. “Can’t say I know a whole lot about that.”

For the first time, I took in his attire properly - large burlap backpack, battered army-style boots, the laces frayed, the near-threadbare edges of his hat. “God. I’m so sorry, I’m such an idiot-”

He shook his head, a shy little smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Don’ be. I like it better when folks don’t have to watch their every word ‘round me. I’m Ryan.”

“I’m Grace. The idiot.” I offered a hand and he shook it, and his palm was wide and warm, a little calloused, and sparks of awareness slid up my arm.

“Do you often play around here?” I gestured to the little stretch of the Chinatown of Flushing, Queens, that my bakery sat on.

“No, ma’am. I’m a traveller. Been t’ New York before, but not this particular spot.”

“And how is this particular spot?”

Ryan drummed his fingers on his guitar thoughtfully. “‘S good. Folk are nice, for the most part.” He started on the second bottle of water, his tongue flicking out to over bottom lip after he drank. “Hot as hell, though, and I say that as a Southern boy.”

I opened my mouth to ask where in the South he hailed from, but Kristi appeared in the doorway of my shop. “Grace? Sorry, Mikey needs the auth code for this delivery.”

“Oh, sure.” I turned back to Ryan. “It was good to meet you. Your music is really fantastic.”

He ducked his head, smiling, a little shy. “Mighty kind of you, ma’am.”

By this point another little crowd had gathered, waiting to hear him sing, and I left them to it. I wished I could have the shop door open to hear him, but that would defeat the point of air conditioning.

But even so, throughout the afternoon, I kept glancing over, seeing him still there, singing. During a busy point I asked Kristi to go and bring him another bottle of water, and I saw the smile he flashed her, feeling jealous of the attention, and called myself utterly ridiculous for it. I hadn’t even known Ryan existed a couple of hours ago.

Customers thinned out. It was a weekday, and business always slowed down around six pm. I shut at seven, so at six-thirty I sent Kristi and Susan home. As they opened the door, I caught a line of song in Ryan’s soft, smooth drawl.

Nine hundred more miles, and I’ll be doin’ just fine-

When he finished, after the small crowd had dropped dollar bills and murmured their appreciation, I called out to him.

“You want to come inside? Have a cold drink? Use the air con?”

I saw the hesitation flick over his face, the trepidation mixed with curiosity, and in the end, the latter must’ve won, because he stood up.

“That’s it for today, ladies and gentlemen,” I heard him say to the people circled around him. A man tossed a couple of bills in his guitar case, and Ryan touched his hat in thanks.

The listeners dispersed, and Ryan settled his guitar in his case like a mother swaddling her baby; with utmost gentleness. And then he looked up, smiling, that dimple winking, and walked towards me.

Taglist: @agirllovespancakes

[flamencodiva]

Hunter Encyclopedia: 2 in the Morning

Description:  Y/N has traveled the world and faced every kind of monster imaginable which is why the nickname Hunter Encyclopedia, or H.E. for short has stuck.  She grew up in the hunting business and knew all about the Winchesters and read the Carver Edlund books before they came to ask her for help. Sam is the researcher and Dean is the action man, or at least that is what she thought, but could she have been wrong?

Pairing: Dean x Reader (eventual), Sam x Reader (Platonic Friendship)

Warnings: Supernatural level Violence.

A/N:  written for @spndeanbingo​

Square filled: 2 in the Morning 

Word Count: 6717

This is also for @supernatural-jackles​ Bi-weekly Challenge. 

Prompts I used:  I dare you to kiss me and  I don’t owe you an explanation

A/N 2: Border by @talesmaniac89​ Beta’d by @emoryhemsworth​ and a special thanks to @waywardbeanie​ for the amazing summary!

Dean paced at the foot of the motel beds with his cell phone in his hands. It had been a few weeks since he talked to Y/N “Hunter Encyclopedia” Y/L/N. Even after the conversation they had last time they met, she still seemed to put Dean in a very peculiar box. It annoyed the elder hunter when Sam would get a phone call from her asking about specific research topics she would need, but never seemed to ask about him. Honestly, what made him hesitate to call was how she would react to it, but right now he and Sam were desperate. 

Right now they were dealing with some form of Chinese monster that they stumbled upon. Dean got excited because the witness they were talking to had said the word Mogwai. The first thing that popped into Dean’s head was the movie Gremlins, but he had to be careful. He, more than anyone else, knew that sometimes stories changed over time. Naturally, one only had to look at the vampire lore to know that garlic did jack shit to them. Lifting his head from the phone in his hand, he looked at the clock on one of the motel nightstands. 

2:00 am 

Would she even be awake? If she was a hunter, most likely, but could he really risk calling her and waking her up from the rest she needed? He could feel Sam’s eyes on him before the movement made Dean turn his head. 

“Don’t you dare,” he called out, finger pointing at his younger brother. “I’m going to call, I just need to know what to tell her.” 

“You mean you need to figure out how you’re going to flirt with her,” Sam sighed as he flipped the page of the book he was reading. “Can you just call her and tell her we have an unknown Chinese monster and so far all we got is the word Mogwai?” 

“I was not thinking of a way to flirt with her, I just… shut up,” Dean huffed. “I know what I need to say so I’ll call her,” he declared looking down at his phone once the screen awoke from its slumber. 

Sam watched as Dean started the call, placing his phone to his ear. The younger Winchester couldn’t help but smirk at the sight of how his older brother was acting. It was rare to see Dean stumble over a girl, let alone someone who brushed him off easily. Sam chuckled when Dean’s back straightened. He figured that Y/N answered his call. 

“Y/N, Dean Winchester,” Dean said as he smiled brightly. “Sorry for calling so late, Sam and I—” Sam watched as he paused and tilted his head in amusement. “Is that the Thundercats theme song?” Dean sounded like a kid being told he was getting ice cream. “Right, sorry, I just—yeah, about my call…Sam is a bit tied up at the moment, we have a very strange case going on.” Sam shook his head as Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s hard to explain, I think it’d be great if you could meet us where we are.” 

“Dean, if you could describe what’s going on it would save me the trip,” Y/N’s voice rang in Dean’s ear. He could hear the hesitation in her voice at meeting up with them again. 

“Y/N, we really need fresh eyes on this. I mean, all we got is one word out of one of the witnesses, an elderly Asian man,” Dean turned his back on Sam and bit his lip. “I’m not sure what it means or how to even say it, the guy spelled it out in Chinese,” he lied through his teeth. 

“I mean, my Chinese isn’t the best,” he heard her sigh. “You know you can send me the picture of the word and I can have an expert look it up for you if you can’t find one.”

God, she was being difficult. 

“Y/N,” Dean practically whined, “Sam and I could really use your help here. You helped us out with Ladon, you were quick on your feet,” Dean pleaded. “We could really use you. I mean, what better team could you have to hunt an unknown Chinese monster than the Winchesters and the Human Encyclopedia, Y/N Y/L/N, huh?” 

“Dean,” he heard her all but whimper. “Fine,” she gave in, “give me your location, but so help me, if this is information you could have just given me over the phone I will kick you in your balls.”

“Come on,” Dean chuckled, “you know you’re dying to get to know the real me, I can tell. Besides, who says we can’t have a fun little adventure figuring this thing out? You can write about it in your journal for future generations to find.” 

“I’d prefer it if this ended up as artifacts of things we never have to do anymore,” she grumbled. “Hunting is not something I would wish on even my worst enemy.” 

Dean let out a low whistle. “You have a heart of gold, sweetheart,” he licked his lips. “Sam and I are in LA. Seems this thing decided to hit up Chinatown,” Dean let out a soft chuckle. “You know they have great food here, not to mention all the iconic places.” 

“Are you asking me to be there for a hunt or to treat me like a tourist?” she asked. 

Dean heard when she stopped packing her things to go join them. 

“The hunt, of course!” Dean scoffed in mock offense, “After we take this thing down we can just kick back a bit and enjoy the scenery, you, Sam, and me,” he croaked out pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Oh,” she seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. “Okay, I guess hanging out with friends once this hunt is successful sounds fun.”

Dean could hear the hesitation in her voice but stifled the groan at the fact that he had to include Sam in their outing. He turned to glance at Sam and waved his arms while his brother mouthed what? at him and shook his head. Dean put his finger to his lips, signaling Sam to stay quiet as he continued his conversation with Y/N. He gave her their current location with the hope that they would see her tomorrow since it was already past 2 am. Knowing that Y/N was coming made Dean a bit more relaxed. 

“Come on,” he sighed before shedding his jacket, button-up shirt, and t-shirt to get ready for bed. “We should get some shut-eye before Y/N gets here tomorrow. Maybe we can talk to some more people and see if we can figure some things out on our own.” 

“Dean,” Sam sighed, “why did you ask her to come? We could have—” 

“You saw how she helped us with the Greek monster case,” Dean reminded him. “She’s a valuable asset and she can help us in a tight pinch! She helped your ass when the nymphs got a hold of you.” 

“True,” Sam smiled, “but then that would mean they liked me more than you. Night, jerk.” 

Dean scoffed. “They didn’t like you more than me, they saw me and knew they couldn’t entrap me,” Dean muttered. “Night, bitch.” 

Later that same day, after Dean and Sam got at least four hours of good rest, the brothers continued with their investigation. So far, Sam had been able to acquire a book on Mogwai, and unfortunately for Sam, it was all in Chinese. 

“Good thing Y/N’s on her way, right?” Dean smiled at Sam, who seemed to have a scowl on his face. “What?” 

“Dean,” Sam turned to face his brother. “What are we going to do once she gets here? I mean, we know the name of the damn thing. I can find a professor and you can call Y/N and tell her not to come.” 

“Not to come? Sam, we need her,” Dean said as he raised an eyebrow. “She could be an extra set of eyes.” 

“Why do you want her here so bad?” Sam asked, crossing his arms. 

“She’s a good hunter, and she helped us out the last time we went up against something we didn’t know about. I mean, do you know what a Mogwai is?” 

“No,” Sam ran his fingers through his hair, “but it’s not that hard to figure out. I mean, I can research!” 

“Awwwww,” Dean mocked, “are you jealous that I’m calling H.E. for help?” 

“H.E.?” Sam asked. 

“Short for ‘“Hunter Encyclopedia,” Dean shrugged. “I mean, you’re still going to do the thing you love, but she’s coming in as a fresh pair of eyes. Besides, we know she travels all over the world, so why not have her help us out?” 

Sam sighed and looked over at Dean. “You’re right, she can help us out.” 

“Knew you’d see it my way,” Dean leaned over and gave his brother a playful punch on the shoulder. “Let’s head back to the motel with the book and grab some food. I’m starving.” 

Sam stayed silent as they made their way back, but as they got closer, he noticed the familiar car. With a smirk, he slapped Dean on his chest and pointed to the compact 2005 Honda Civic. Dean rolled his eyes at the car. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate it, not in the slightest, it was just something he never thought a hunter would ever drive, let alone someone like Y/N. He would have pegged her for a convertible girl, a nice Mustang in her favorite color. Dean reached under his seat and pulled out a small package, ignoring  Sam’s call as he made his way towards the grey Civic.

Dean adjusted his jacket and knocked on the window watching as Y/N rolled it down. “Gotta say, H.E., I never pegged you as one to drive a Japanese sardine can,” he chuckled softly. “How about I take you out to a car lot after we gank whatever this is and get you a real car?” 

“Compared to your very sexy car,” Y/N smiled, “I don’t have to stop every few miles to gas up. Are you going to let me get out or keep leaning on my door all day?” 

Dean jumped back slightly and blushed in embarrassment, the package he had for her behind his back. “Sorry,” he waited for her to close the window and climb out of the car. “Gotta say, I didn’t really expect you to get here until tomorrow. You okay?” 

“Yeah,” she sighed as she turned around to flip her chair forward to reach for her bag, missing the way Dean tilted his head as he checked out her ass. “I sorta drove as fast as I could to get here, kinda stayed up all night.” 

“Shit, Y/N,” Dean cursed as he reached for her bag. “You can stay with us in our room. You should take a nap.” 

Y/N shook her head stifling a soft yawn. “This is nothing. I’ve done all-nighters before, and you said it was urgent.” 

Dean kicked himself mentally for doing this. Maybe Sam was right, maybe he should have just told her what they had found and sent her pictures of the text. 

“Were you on a hunt?” Dean asked curiously. 

“More like hunting for more artifacts,” Y/N sighed. “Got a tip on some more resources and books on some ancient things. I do have a trip to Turkey planned in the next couple of months. I have a contact who says he got some information on a different kind of Djinn, a real-life Genie. They’re not the ones we encounter here, but they seem more like a dying breed than anything else.” 

“So they actually grant wishes?” Dean asked as he led her to their room. “Because I can say I was captured by𑁋” 

“Djinn, yeah, I heard. How was that? I mean, I know they put you in an induced dream state that reflects your innermost desires,” she started to ramble, “but I know other Djinns induce fear and panic or just give you a recurring nightmare.” 

“You could say that,” Dean sighed as he placed her bag on his bed. “You can use my bed, I’ll take the couch.” 

“What? No, I can take the couch. I don’t want to take your bed away𑁋” 

“You’re not, I promise.” Dean held up his hand and walked over to the small table, placing the package on top of it. “You go ahead and nap, Sam and I will order food and show you what we found.” 

Y/N nodded reluctantly and let Dean help her into his bed. Something about the way the huntress curled up onto the pillow had Dean yearning to caress her cheek, but he thought better of it. They were just starting to become friends, he didn’t want her to think that she was a conquest. Then again, he wouldn’t mind if he was able to steal a few kisses from her, or more. Dean was amazed at how fast she fell asleep. 

Dean and Sam ordered Chinese food from a local place close by, making sure to save some for Y/N for when she woke up. It didn’t take long for the aroma of food to rouse the sleeping huntress. 

“Hey, Sleeping Beauty,” Dean joked. “Sleep okay?” 

Y/N simply nodded as she let out a small groan and stretched. Dean couldn’t help but bite his lower lip at how adorable she looked, her hair a mess, and her shirt slightly askew. With one last stretch and a roll of her neck and shoulders, Y/N got up from the bed and made her way towards the table where Dean helped her to her seat. He offered her a container of food, which she happily accepted while grabbing a pair of chopsticks to use. 

Sam and Dean seemed to have a silent conversation as she ate. She could feel the tension building between the brothers. She had read countless times how the brothers seemed to be able to have a telepathic conversation. She could tell it was from years of having to take care of each other. Y/N, on the other hand, never had siblings. She’d always been alone, having to fend for herself. Her father didn’t get into hunting later as John Winchester did, he was bred for it. Her mother was killed by a shifter pretending to be him, which led him on a crusade to end all the shifters he could. 

Her father every now and then remembered he had a daughter who needed him. Not to say he didn’t have his moments, but Y/N learned to be compliant and become a good soldier. The way he spoke of her mother and the heartbreak he endured caused her to turn to books and lore for solace. It also helped keep her father alive when she found information that he could use to his advantage. 

After swallowing a few mouthfuls of food, Y/N put down the container and took a sip of the beer Dean had placed in front of her. “So, what have you got so far in terms of information?” she asked, breaking the silence. “I mean, you guys are having trouble identifying the thing right? Are there any characteristics that you can tell me? Things that this thing might do that seem like a habit?” 

 “Oh, it’s called a Mogwai,” Sam said before his smile fell and he looked over at Dean who was ready to murder him. 

“Really?” Y/N turned to look at Dean and raised her eyebrow at him. “How did you figure it out?” 

“Well, H.E., you see,” Dean let out a small nervous chuckle, “we were coming back from talking to more people and found someone who could translate the word we got,” he let out beautifully, mentally patting himself in the back for being so smooth. “I mean, I was going to call you when we got back but then, well𑁋” he broke off and motioned to the bed and smiled. 

“Right,” Y/N gave him a suspicious glare and nodded while clicking her tongue, “ you know it’s a thing called a Mogwai, so what does it do?” 

“We don’t know,” Sam spoke up. “So far we’ve come across a shit ton of mischievous encounters and accidents that don’t seem normal.”  

“Okay,” Y/N turned to Sam and smiled, “did you guys find anything useful on your second go-around with witnesses?” 

“We found a book,” Sam answered, getting up from his chair and walking over to the bag on his bed and procuring the book. “We can’t really read it because it’s all in Chinese.” 

“You know,” Y/N said as she turned to Dean, “you owe me big time for getting me out here. You know you guys are more than capable of handling this thing on your own.”

“Y/N, come on!” Dean whined. “You know as well as I do that if it wasn’t for your sharp senses Sam would be under the influence of nymphs and Ladon would have made me his dinner if I went to attack him head-on.” 

“Dean𑁋” 

“Y/N, what’s so wrong with you giving us a bit of extra hunter power, huh?” Dean asked, giving her a slightly pleading look.

Y/N tilted her head at Dean before shifting her attention to Sam and giving him a silent look. When Sam shrugged she sighed, closed her eyes, and rubbed at her temples. When she opened her eyes she gave a nod and stood from her seat, grabbing the container and chopsticks. Dean watched as she paced at the foot of the two beds, shoveling the food into her mouth. Her face was pensive,  different from when they had to hunt Ladon. 

“Fine,” she let out, “I will help you out.” She pointed to Dean before speaking again. “The only reason why I am helping you is that for some reason, some of these monsters from outside the States seem to be coming here, and since I have been traveling quite a bit recently, I can be useful in getting things straightened out.” 

Dean happily slapped the table and let out a small cheer. “Yes! Thank you! See, you hunting with us, we are going to make an awesome team!”  

“Winchester,” Y/N shook her head and placed her now empty container in the trash before turning to the green-eyed hunter. “You are not to call me for Shifters, Vamps, Rugarus, Werewolves, Djinns, Vetala, Leviathan, or any other supernatural creature that I know you know how to gank.” 

By the end of her list, Y/N had walked over to him, poking his chest with every creature she named. Dean couldn’t help but swallow thickly as he gazed into her eyes. There was something there, he could see it, but he wasn’t sure what it was. When she backed away, Dean let out a sigh of relief. He continued to observe her as she went to her bag and began ruffling through it. Y/N had taken out her scanner, a portable printer, her laptop, and her battered up, almost full journal. 

“Okay, do you have anything that I may need to scan to try to run it through my translator app on my laptop?” She asked looking at Sam. “I can’t guarantee success, but it’s worth a shot.”

“Uh, yeah,” Sam snapped out of his trance having watched her handle his brother. “A guy gave us this book; he said it would tell us what we needed to know about the Mogwai.” 

“You know,” Dean let out trying to join the conversation, “that damn name sounds familiar to me.” 

“What? Mogwai?” Y/N let out a scoff. “I can’t believe you don’t recognize it. It’s what the fluffy gremlin was named in the movie Gremlins.” 

“Holy shit! That’s it!” Dean clapped his hands. “So is it anything like the movie? I mean, what, uh𑁋no getting it wet or feeding it after midnight right?”

“Not everything is like the movie genius,” Y/N almost sneered before taking a deep breath. “Look, it might be the same thing, there could be some truth to it, but who knows.” 

Dean was taken a bit aback at her tone and licked his lips, bowing his head. “So what do you need?” 

“Why?” Y/N asked him as she looked up from her laptop. “From you? Nothing, Sam and I’ve got it.” 

“Don’t do this again, Y/N,” Dean groaned. “I can help.” 

“Can you read Cantonese?” She asked, leaning back in her chair and raising an eyebrow at him. 

“No, but Sam can’t either,” he pointed out. 

“Yeah, but Sam knows his way around a good computer program,” Y/N shot back trying to get back to setting up her program. 

“Hey,” Dean slammed his hand on the table making her jump, “I’ll have you know I was shown how to hack and how to look through back doors by one of the best hackers I knew. His name was Frank, and he helped us stay low when the Leviathans were after us.” 

“I heard about that,” Y/N couldn’t help but smirk at his attempt to be helpful, “but this isn’t hacking. If you want to help, do you think once the pages are printed and translated you can start reading?” 

“I𑁋yeah, I can do that! I mean, I can read,” Dean let out before groaning in embarrassment. 

Y/N reached over and patted his cheek. “I know you can, big guy, you must be so proud.” 

Dean frowned and shot Sam an angry glare when he let out a laugh before coughing to try and hide it. Dean watched as Y/N put Sam to work scanning the pages of the book and waiting for the translated pages to pop up. 

“Okay, I’m not going to waste what little paper I have. Once I see the word, I’ll start printing,” she sighed and rubbed her eyes. 

It took an hour before Dean heard the printer come to life and start printing. Once the page was done, Y/N reached over and held it out to Dean. 

“It won’t bite,” she let out, “just don’t expect me to keep handing you the pages. I need to do my own reading to make sure I’m giving you the right pages.” 

Dean nodded as he took the page and began reading. For the most part, it gave a history of the different Chinese legends. He smiled when he read the next paragraph. 

“Looks like there was some truth to how the movie went,” he said. “Listen to this: ‘The Mogwai is a demon that reproduces during the rainy season but is careful not to reproduce when it rains as to not bring good fortune. It likes to cause mischief and self-destruction upon any unsuspecting humans they find as their prey.’”

“Okay, so the whole thing about getting wet is because they don’t want to bring good luck while they screw?” Y/N said as she nodded. “Okay, anything on where they might hang out?” 

“Sounds like it’s in every monster’s favorite place to hide,” Dean said with a smile, “any place dark and dank.”

“We’re in LA,” Y/N scoffed, “might as well say the whole city is its playground.”

“Well, let’s not waste time,” Dean said grabbing his jacket. “Let’s go and find it in Chinatown,” he suggested. “I mean, it’s where everything has been going wrong.” 

The trio had left the motel room heading right back to Chinatown for their search. It took another few hours before they found the demon: a woman with red eyes and sharp teeth, her ears pointy and her fingers long. Y/N and Dean both used the idea that fire could kill it, much like the gremlins in the movie. Once it was over, Dean pulled Sam aside and cleared his throat. 

“Okay, you are going to go back to the motel room and Y/N and I are going to stay out and hang out,” Dean said to Sam, placing a hand on his brother’s shoulder.   

“What? Why?” Sam asked, tilting his head in confusion, “I want to hang out with Y/N too!” 

“You two will have plenty of time to talk later,” Dean insisted, “so just tell her you’re not feeling too hot after I suggest we go out and explore the city.” 

“You want me to lie to her?” Sam said in disbelief. “You know she could have helped us over the phone and you dragged her here for what? Because you want her to not have this ‘man whore’ image of you?”

“Tell ‘er you’ve got a tummy ache,” Dean suggested giving his brother a pleading look.  

“A tummy ache, Dean? I’m not saying that.” Sam gave his brother his best bitchface.  

Dean ran a hand across his face before putting both hands on Sam’s shoulders. “Then tell her you’ve got intestinal distress, something, man! Tell her you can’t go!” He gave Sam a pleading look. “Please? Sam come on, let me just have alone time with her. If I’m going to have a chance to show her that I’m more than just a ruggedly handsome face, I need to spend time with her, please.” 

Sam looked at Dean’s face and sighed. His brother clearly had a thing for the huntress that had been given the title Encyclopedia. It was one of the few times Sam had seen Dean desperate to impress a girl. 

“Fine,” he conceded, “but you fucking owe me, big time.” 

“Absolutely!” Dean agreed, “But for now, you need to vamoose!” 

Sam gave Dean a smile shaking his head before turning to Y/N and saying his goodbyes. Dean wasn’t sure what Sammy had said, but he could see Y/N’s face grow with concern. 

“So, since Sammy is going back to rest,” Dean offered her a smile, “want to find a good place to hang out, eat some good food and drink?” 

“I appreciate it, but I should head back and pack,” she turned to walk away from him. “Thanks for this, it was fun.” 

Dean ran after her. “Whoa, wait there H.E.,” he said, cutting off her path and putting his hands on her shoulders. “What’s wrong with one drink, an arcade game, or a midnight snack?” 

“I𑁋” Y/N looked into his eyes and could see he really wanted her to stay. “I guess it could give me a chance to know the real you. I mean,” she offered him a small smile, “you did recognize the theme song to Thundercats, so I’m sure we can talk about a few things.” 

“See,” Dean pointed out, “this is the perfect opportunity for us to talk and you can know the real me.” 

The two of them walked down around Chinatown before finding a Korean barbecue spot that was open. The conversation flowed and they talked about their favorite books to read, To Y/N’s surprise,  aside from Vonnegut and Tolstoy, Dean actually had an extensive collection of books. 

“So how come no one knows this side of you?” She asked as she grabbed her chopsticks to pick up a piece of meat that was grilling between them. 

Dean gave a shrug before downing the soju Y/N had served him. “I mean, I never really thought about it. I always tried to make sure Sam was the smart one.  School for me was just a placeholder until I could hunt,” he said, grabbing a piece of meat from the grill. “I tried, don’t get me wrong, but then we’d move again and I’d have to start over and it just wasn’t my thing. I like being the cool guy, you know?” 

“I get that,” she nodded, “but who said you can’t be the cool guy and smart?” 

“You got a point there,” Dean said. “At the same time, I don’t really see myself doing anything else but hunting.” 

“Yeah, I hear you there,” she knocked back her own shot of soju and hissed as the liquid was warm going down her throat. “I mean, I dove into my books because it was all I thought I was good for, that and my dad didn’t want me to end up like my mom. I𑁋” she paused and offered him a smile, “you’re lucky to have Sam, and he’s lucky to have you.” 

“No siblings?” Dean asked and frowned when she shook her head. 

“It sucks I know, but Dad really did try his best. I mean, he wasn’t perfect, but he tried.” Her voice was barely a whisper as she stared at the hot burning coals through the metal grate. 

Dean rushed over to her side and pulled her in for a hug. “I know better than anyone about dads and their revenge kicks,” he muttered. 

“Yeah,” she echoed and pulled away, “thanks.” 

“So,” Dean decided to change the subject, “play any video games?” 

That threw them into a conversation about arcades and about trying to get as many prizes from the crane machine and learning all the different tricks to win. Y/N was letting go a little more around him, the handsome hunter who she never thought she could ever talk to,  yet here she was swapping stories and having a good time. The conversation turned to hunting and Y/N was laughing at a few of Dean’s stories. 

“So your brother is closing up the grave and he𑁋” she stopped to giggle. 

“He split his pants open, yup,” Dean chuckled. “Needless to say, I took a nice picture of it. I had to, it’s blackmail material.” 

“Of course it is,” Y/N laughed. 

Dean turned to look at her and his heart pounded in his chest. The way she put her whole body into it as she laughed really had him feeling something. He wasn’t sure what it was, but there was something about Y/N that had him wanting to spend more time with her. 

“I dare you to kiss me,” he said with a cocky smirk and a wink. “See if any of the stories gave you the right info about how I kiss.”

Y/N let out a snort, turning her face to hide the blush that rose in her cheeks. She blamed the soju for that. When she turned to face Dean, his face was slightly closer to her. Lifting her hand, she playfully pushed it away with a giggle. “You’re such a dork,” she let out shaking her head. “I’m not going to kiss you. Besides, you don’t want to kiss me.” 

“Who says I don’t?” Dean asked as he smirked at her. 

Y/N rolled her eyes before pointing to Dean and saying, “Fred Jones,” then pointed to herself, “Velma Dinkley.” She poured herself another small shot of soju. “We had this discussion before, remember?” 

“Oh, I remember,” Dean chuckled, “but I think you’re wrong.” Dean poured himself some more soju and smiled. “You really know how to kill a guy who’s trying.”

“Trying to what?” Y/N snorted, grabbing another piece of meat from the hot grill before placing some more on it.

“Trying to have a chance of getting a date?” Dean said casually and quickly moved to pat her back when she started coughing. “You okay?” 

Y/N nodded, swatting him away. She must have heard wrong; there was no way that Dean Winchester wanted to go out on a date with her. Her, the nerd of all nerds. The nerd whose head was filled with nothing but brainy information that would turn any guy away. She looked over at Dean, whose green eyes seemed to be awaiting an answer. It was a joke, right? So Y/N did the only thing she could, laugh. 

Dean raised his eyebrow in confusion. She was laughing? What was so funny about what he said? 

“Sorry,” she let out after her laughter subsided, “it just sounded like you were trying to ask me out?” 

“I, um,” Dean gave her an awkward smile, “I was. I mean, is the idea that funny?”

His words sobered her up really quickly. “Oh, oh gosh,” she covered her face with her hands. “I’m sorry.” Putting her hands down, she seemed to be focusing on a spot on the table. “That’s a bad idea.” 

“To go out with me? Why?” Dean asked, “I mean, we’re out right now.” 

“Yeah, as hunting partners, celebrating a hunt that was successful,” she pointed out. “Look, I agreed to get to know you so that I could shed the misconceptions I had about you, but right now, you seem to be trying to prove me right.”

“What?” Dean tilted his head in confusion. “Me asking you out on a date is proving the misconceptions right? How?” 

“Look, you’re a flirt by nature and I can’t fault you for that,” she grabbed a glass full of water and took a huge gulp, “but right now, you flirting with me is,” she took a small pause, “let’s just say that we are not each other’s type.” 

Dean let out a small scoff, shoulder slumping forward. “You’re still thinking that I’m just a playboy, huh?” 

Y/N swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat, “I don’t owe you an explanation, that’s how it is sometimes Dean,” she grabbed her wallet from her bag and pulled a few bills from it. 

“Put it away, it’s on me,” Dean said as he placed his hand on hers forcing her to put away her wallet. “Look, I will tone the flirting down if I need to but, I do want to be your friend Y/N,” he looked up at her. 

“Dean,” she found herself staring into his eyes. She couldn’t help but get lost in them. She could swear there was a small glint in his eyes, but she was imagining things. “Friends is all I can do. I’ve been burned before.” 

“You tell me who he is and I can guarantee I can kick his ass,” Dean offered with a smile. 

“That’s sweet, Fred,” she smiled back at him. “All I can say is that he used me for nothing more than my brains and said that my looks were nothing compared to the other huntresses he’s been with.” 

“Yeah, he’s a douche,” Dean huffed. “I can promise you, H.E.𑁋” he paused and snapped his fingers shaking his head, “nope, you called me Fred, only fair I call you Velma,” he declared. “Velma, I can promise you that, and I am totally saying this as a friend, you are beautiful, and if you let me I could be your wingman!”  

“My wingman?” she raised her eyebrow at him. “You can’t be serious.” 

“Why not? I can filter out the assholes from the good guys,” Dean said. “I mean, you’ve read Chuck’s account of me. Tell me, has he ever written me as some of the douches you know?” 

Y/N thought for a moment, and he was right: every story she read, every account she had heard all pointed to Dean being a playboy, but never in any of the stories did she ever hear of Dean treating a woman with disrespect. In fact, in some of her travels, she had encountered girls who had Dean for one night and they all said the same thing: he was a gentleman the whole night and a god in the sheets. 

“I’ll think about it,” she conceded. “I’m not really looking for anything. I mean, you know this life, it’s not very conducive for having a healthy relationship.” 

Dean couldn’t help but nod at that. “Yeah, I know, but doesn’t mean we have to hide and hole ourselves away from having some fun, right?” 

Y/N had to laugh. “Yeah, you’re right. I guess we should head back to the motel. I hope Sam is doing okay. Kind of sad he missed out.” 

“Yeah, he’s got a very weak constitution,” Dean sighed. “Poor guy eats healthy just to keep his body from falling apart, unlike me,” he gave her his best Dean Winchester smoulder. “I’m just stronger and fitter. It’s why the ladies love me.” 

“Can’t argue with you there,” Y/N muttered. 

“Why, Velma,” Dean acted in mock surprise, “are you saying you find me attractive?” 

Y/N rolled her eyes and bumped her hip with his. “Shut up, Fred.” 

When they got to the motel, Dean let Y/N change in the bathroom while he changed out in the room. Sam was laying in bed and awoke when they arrived. 

“So, what happened?” Sam asked as he sat up. 

“We talked,” Dean shrugged, “got to understand one another. We’re friends. Oh, and I hope you can still feel that tummy ache in the morning because you do have a weak constitution, Mr. Health Nut,” Dean said as he gave his brother a pat on the shoulder before grabbing an extra blanket and a pillow from Sam’s bed and made his way to the couch. 

“What? Dean, you𑁋” Sam stopped mid-sentence when the door to the bathroom opened and Y/N walked out. 

“Hey Sam, are you still feeling sick?” She asked softly, giving him a warm smile. 

“Had some ginger tea, so I’m feeling slightly better,” he forced out with a thin-lipped smile. 

“We should get some sleep, I have a long drive back home and I’m sure you guys have somewhere to be,” she climbed into the bed and laid down to sleep. 

The next morning as they packed their things, Dean couldn’t help but steal glances at Y/N. There was just something about her that Dean just couldn’t put his finger on. Sure she was easy on the eyes, but there was something else, something that kept nagging him about the way she talked badly about herself. Shaking off his thoughts, he finished packing the last of his things and zipped up his bag. 

“So I guess you head to Turkey in a few days, huh?” He asked, walking over towards her once she zipped up her bag. 

“Yeah,” she breathed, “but I’m sure I’ll be able to grab some good information and artifacts to bring back,” she smiled brightly, her voice giving off a hint of excitement. 

“If I wasn’t afraid of flying I’d definitely love to join you,” Dean said. “I mean, it’s the Mediterranean, so I’d love to see if you know how to belly dance,” he chuckled and wiggled his eyebrows, earning a smack on his chest from her. 

“Can you turn off the charm for two seconds?” She let out a soft giggle.   

“Nah,” Dean shook his head, “I wouldn’t be me if I did.” 

“Touché,” she muttered. “I’ll see you guys around,” Y/N said as she was about to turn to climb into her car when she stopped and turned back to poke a finger to Dean’s chest. “Remember our deal, only monsters that you have never hunted before mister.” 

“I’ll try,” Dean shrugged. “I make no guarantees. I might just want to hang out with you again.” 

Y/N rolled her eyes leaving Dean to chuckle by himself as he watched her climb into her car. Once she had started to pull away from the parking lot, he turned to the Impala and Sam who was leaning against the car waving at Y/N who waved back. 

“So, are you finally going to call her just to talk or will you only call her when you need her help again?” Sam asked, earning him a punch. 

“Baby steps, Sammy,” he sighed, “baby steps.” 

Watching the Honda Civic turn away from the motel, Dean found himself itching to call her again. He already missed the sound of her voice and the way her eyes shined when she was excited about a hunt. He swore to himself that he would call her the next day, even if it was just to check in. After all, the way to build a friendship was to take baby steps. 

HE: Impala

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[chaletnz]

Tokyo: A Day in Daiba

My morning began with a walk around the temples and gates of Yokohama’s Chinatown follow a delicious breakfast in the café attached to my hostel. The receptionist doubled as a barista and chef who lovingly prepared a latte and some French toast for me as we chatted. I was worried about the state of the coffee when I heard the milk screeching as he steamed it but actually it turned out fine! During my time working in hotels and having access to free stays on most trips I had forgotten how much better the vibe is when staying in a hostel – I definitely prefer it, the conversations are far deeper and you can meet some very interesting people. Generally, the staff in hostels can speak English better than the staff in hotels, probably because they also like to travel and have learned the “universal language”. After breakfast I made my way to Tokyo’s small island area of Daiba to meet my ex-colleague Sayane who would accompany me for the day. It was only 10am but sweltering already. Luckily I had arrived about 30 minutes earlier than necessary so I was able to store my heavy bag in a locker and sit down in a shady spot to wait for Sayane to arrive from her journey from Karuizawa. She arrived with our tickets to teamLAB Borderless which is a “light museum” I suppose... it’s a large space with no guidebook or map, you simply wander around the space to experience the light displays. We were almost the first in the queue so were instructed to scan our tickets, check away our bags and watch a quick video before we entered through the black curtains. Inside there were darkened hallways leading to rooms with different displays and unique atmospheres in each one. The art changes throughout the day so you can visit the same room or space a few times and it will be different. Characters like bunnies and tigers are projected onto the walls, flowers and leaves float around on the floor, some rooms had hanging lamps and strips of LED lights that changed colour with the music. One room had interactive figures that danced or made noise as it detected your presence nearby and another was a circular room with waves on the cyclorama and some couches in the middle to sit on. It is hard to describe the experience in detail, but the photos certainly came out nice! At ¥3200 per ticket it definitely wasn’t cheap but I guess their electricity bill is quite high... After about an hour and a half we felt that we had seen it all, including visits to the same place a few times to see how the art had changed, and decided to have lunch at a very convenient Wendy’s located directly opposite. The bacon cheeseburger was a welcome treat of fast food and for whatever strange reason, this Wendy’s was having a promotion of Dutch poffertjes so of course I had to try them! They were buttery, delicious, and dare I say authentic? Although the powdered sugar was lacking I think any Dutch expat would be satisfied. Next we visited the Venus Fort mall to check out the architecture, the entire mall was very well done – the roof was closed and designed to look like a sunny sky, the shops all had facades similar to a European town, and there were tiles, a fountain, church, and streetlamps to make it feel like you’re really walking in an old village somewhere across the world. Sayane and I sat down for a Starbucks coffee and a chat somewhere among this grand plaza and decided what our afternoon would involve. Not wanting to spend too much money we settled on walking to a nearby observatory but discovered it was closed due to the lockdown when we arrived. Instead we took the train to the Liberty Flame and a viewpoint for the Rainbow Bridge which was very impressive with the Olympic rings in the bay nearby. There was another mall with a huge Gundam statue outside (I think it’s something from an anime...) so we took some photos and watched all the cosplayers trying to get the best poses with it. It was still so hot so we wanted air conditioning and decided to have a look in this mall too. This one was a bit more within our budget so we both got carried away in the shops and I ended buying a few more T-shirts from Hollister that I didn’t need – but they were on sale! After our shopping escapades we finished up with the luxurious Cremia ice cream, they were unfortunately sold out of caramel but we had a chocolate vanilla swirl each. It started dripping through the cone immediately so I was forced to devour it before it melted. Outside it was now the perfect temperature so we finished our ice creams there and then cleaned up our sticky faces and hands with a wet wipe that Sayane conveniently had. We walked back to the train station together, via a hydrangea path, and then went our separate ways. I had to walk a bit further up to my train station so I took a sunset walk around and got a few more photos before riding back to Shimbashi Station to check into my hotel. As I walked there I passed the Park Hotel Tokyo and had to do a double take as a realised I would be staying just down the road from where I had stayed in 2015 with Bryce! Of course I had to take a photo and send it to him for old time’s sake. I was assigned a room on the 11th floor which had a great view over Tokyo. After ditching my heavy bag again I headed back out to check my route in preparation for tomorrow and found a bakery with discounts on everything and picked up some pastries for breakfast and some pizza for tonight to heat up in my microwave.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #348

“nothing will be free  /  nothing will be done  /  black out the sun”

Do you have any famous relatives? My third or so cousin is the author of Not Without My Daughter, but she's not like a smash hit or anything that most people know. I really do recommend the book, though. It's a long read, but a beautiful, true story. Do you care about celebrity gossip? Nah. Have you ever failed a science course in high school? No; I was very good at science. What’s your favorite breakfast food? Cinnamon rolls. Does your house have a basement? No. No house I've ever lived in has had one. Do you like Hot Topic? Well duh. Do you think imagination is valuable? VERY! Just imagine how many incredible things wouldn't exist without it. What was your reaction to your first time falling in love? Unspeakably happy, and I felt like I was building a future with someone. I felt like I had purpose, which I should mention to anyone reading is a mindset to NEVER adopt. No one gives you purpose; you're born with it. How much weight can you lift at once? Ha, not a lot. When you have your own house someday, what color Christmas tree do you want and how will you decorate it? I want a black one with faux snow on the branches, then maybe red ornaments. Kinda look like blood dripping off. Sounds metal. Name three YouTube channels you’ve been loving lately. Lately, John Wolfe, The Dark Den, and Aim To Head Mix. Have you ever bought a designer purse? No. Do you wear jewelry often? No. What color was your senior prom dress? Black. Are you colorblind? No. Name the people you know who are colorblind. Jason's older brother is colorblind to two colors, but idr which. Would you ever consider a career in writing? I'd love to. What was your first favorite color? Red. What do you think about horror movies? I love them. If you love them, what’s your favorite? I really enjoy The Crazies and both The Blair Witch Project movies. Oh, and of course Silent Hill. Got any cool Christmas presents picked out for family or friends yet? I don't have the money to get anyone presents... and while I sometimes get ideas about something I could make someone, then it wouldn't be fair to the rest of my family if I don't make them something, too. What’s your favorite word and why? I really like the sound of "serendipity," as well as its meaning. It's just a pretty, nice word. Do you like to do craft projects? If so, what’s the coolest thing you made? Not really... I think the coolest thing I made was when I put the clay heart I made in Art into a shadowbox, and a poem I wrote was in the background. It was a gift for Jason. I remember working really hard on the whole process and being really happy with it. I don't want to know what he's done with it since. What’s one occupation you think gets paid too much and doesn’t deserve to? I don't know. What’s something you are currently saving money for to buy? Everyone knows about Venus' terrarium by now... Do you smoke/vape? If so, what brand do you smoke/what device do you use? No. Ever done drugs? No. Tell me one of your worst habits. Catastrophizing. I take a tiny seed of something potentially bad, and in seconds it's a damn redwood tree. And I do mean "in seconds." What’s a weird quirk you have that no one else you know does? I don't know, I don't have any particularly unique ones, I think. If you game, what type of headset do you use? I just use earbuds. Do you think you would be a good therapist? You know, it's funny, I've actually pictured myself as one a few times, given my level of understanding and empathy for people, as well as how deeply I want to see others succeed and spread the word that recovery from things like depression is very possible. I've never truly entertained the thought, though, given I'm quite sure I legally couldn't be given my suicidal past and mental illnesses. There is also NO way I could listen to so many people's suffering and manage to stay healthy myself, so, no therapist position for me, thanks. Have you ever been to a Chinatown? No. Do you prefer chunky or creamy peanut butter? Creamy, 100%. Do you stop to pick up heads-up pennies? No. Do your pets have collars? Describe them: Roman has an adorable navy one with a bowtie. Do you have any friends that speak any languages you don’t understand? Old friends, sure. What is something you want to begin learning? I want to improve my ability to perform what in therapy is called "opposite action," where you do the opposite of what your depression (or other conditions) make you want to do. It always helps me feel good, like when I draw even when I don't initially feel like it, but it's rough to really force yourself to do it. What is a food you find comforting when you are sad? Ice cream is my comfort food. What is a quote you find comfort in? There are really a lot, but none come to mind immediately, gah. What is one Tumblr blog you really appreciate? I actually haven't been on my main Tumblr in months, but oh my god there is a Markiplier blog called "lady-raziel" and she is FUCKING HYSTERICAL. The meme quality is A+. What is a comfort movie/show for you? When I actually liked watching movies, I enjoyed watching Silent Hill when I was down. That whole franchise just makes me so happy. What is a recent creative project that you are proud of? That I'm PROUD of, idk. I'm not that happy with the last drawing I made, and I haven't done any serious writing lately that I find noteworthy. What is a video game that you find comforting? Shadow of the Colossus is probably #1. I find it so relaxing while equally epic as fuck. The soundtrack is to die for, and after playing it a billion times, it's pretty easy for me to kinda breeze through and just enjoy myself. Do you know how to bake bread? If so, what is something you’ve baked recently? No. Would you rather live in the mountains, city, beach, or the forest? THE MOUNTAINS!!! Particularly in the woods IN the mountains! Are you closer to your mother’s or father’s side of the family? Mom's. I don't even remember anyone from Dad's. Have you ever been in a “perfect relationship”? I thought so. Have you ever lost a fingernail or toenail? No. Were you a Disney or Nickelodeon kid? I preferred Disney. Have you ever been inside a jail/prison? No, and I don't plan on it. Have you ever dated a guy with a beard, mustache, or goatee? Jason had a goatee usually. He'd go clean-shaven sometimes. Did you ever name your stuffed animals? I named every single one I got as a kid. Now I don't, really, unless they're really special. What’s the name of the person who cuts your hair? I'd rather not share, given her name is very unique. Do you like cheeseburgers? Yes, they're one of my favorite foods. Do you have a Flickr? Yes, but I don't use it anymore. Did you ever want to be a fashion designer? No. Do you drink milk? Yeah, I love milk. Where was your FB display pic taken? My room. Have you ever burnt your tongue like REALLY bad? If so, what on? Yeah; white rice. My dumb ass didn't realize it had JUST come off the stove. My tongue hurt literally for weeks. Have you ever gotten your legs waxed? No. Do you own any CLOTHES from Victoria’s Secret? Er, are undergarments not clothes? But I know what you mean. No. What are your grandfathers’ names? William and... I can't remember Dad's dad's name. Have you ever seen a snake in real life? Well yeah. Are you against seances? I don't know if I believe in them being effective, but either way, they seem like a bad idea. Even risking luring a negative energy/spirit to you is something I'd stay away from. Do you own any superhero shirts? No, just Harley Quinn ones, some with the Joker on them, too. I need to toss 'em though because I am like, violently against romanticizing their abusive relationship. I used to just like them as a story character couple, but I got to a place where it just seemed... wrong to "glorify" it by wearing merch and stuff. What band has the best guitar solos? Metallica, durrrr. Who is the biggest jerk you’ve ever met? Can you believe that would be my former best friend? Have you ever swerved off the road to avoid hitting an animal? I've never had an animal in my path. Have you ever grown your own herbs? No. Do you like kissing in public? If you're my serious s/o, I could care less, so long as it's a simple peck. I'm not making out in front of people. Do you think someone has feelings for you? I don't know. Do you want to be in a relationship this year? I don't know. I'm lonely and love feels amazing, but I need to get my life on track before I can be a good partner to someone and not just dead weight. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Huh, funny, he's the one that walked away. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? Uhhh that would depend on how serious we are, where we are, and just what mood I'm in. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? ugh What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone? also ugh What’s your dirtiest secret? TMI AHEAD. Probably receiving oral while bare-ass naked on the chaise in the living room while we were home alone. Or having sex in my sister’s bed. Oops. Would you ever get lyrics tattooed on yourself? Yeah. I already do, anyway, and I plan on getting another. Can you photoshop images well? I'm decent at it. Where did you last drive to? Mom and I went to go get our Covid vaccines today. What’s the first verse of the last song you listened to? "I don't know what we're supposed to be, but I know we lost it along the way to something better, something so much more than pleasure that we seek, so blind inside to fill these holes left by these lies that we tell to ourselves as we manufacture our own hell." What do you hear right now? The aforementioned song: "BLACKOUT" by 3TEETH. What was the last thing you laughed about? This is so fucking immature lmao but when we were driving earlier, we passed a gas station that had a sign that was advertising Coke, but due to space limitations, it abbreviated to "2 liter Cok" and I cackled like a child. Mom laughed harder than I did. Do you know any gay people personally? Ye. What was the last thing that startled you? I think it was a car hoonking at somebody the other day. What was the last thing to make you even remotely sad? Today's been a kind of rough PTSD day thanks to Facebook. My old high school friend had her beautiful daughter, a childhood friend just got married the other day, another friend is due to have her baby in just a couple weeks... It's just weird but even more painful to know it was the life I once fantasized about with a guy that just dropped me and made a break for it. I hate admitting that there's this deep, deep bitterness in me about it, like he took my life away from me, even though that's of course very unfair to say. I don't want to talk about this anymore, so moving on with my day.

[randomoranges]

An Ode to the Summer of 2020

 Back in the days when I was in Cégep and university, when LJ was the place to post musings and fics, I would do a recap of all the things I had done over the summer. It was the first time I had such long summers (from May to the end of August and then from April to the start of September.)

 It made me look back to all the things I had done. It’s easy to forget what you’ve done and easy to feel as though you’ve wasted your time doing nothing.

 This year, with the pandemic and everything else, it turned out to be an even longer summer. For starters, I was only working one day a week as a teacher. So despite having to do Zooms and video capsules, I still had a lot of free time. I was fortunate and privileged that I didn’t need to worry about income, since I live at home and was already on employment insurance. I have no debts and no children to worry about. I know that this wasn’t the case for many, many people.

 It was also a very different summer since for the first time ever – ever, ever, I was actually free in the actual summer. I wasn’t working, since I returned to teaching, and was no longer working in the camps.

 It was – for as much as it was stressful and worriesome – a pretty decent “stay at home period”. The greatest thing, by far, was able to run on my own schedule. Follow my own rhythm. Go to bed when my body told me to and let myself sleep until I naturally woke up. That is, by far, the greatest thing I will miss.

 So, before I go back to getting up at the ass crack of dawn and the world of the packed lunch (I fucking hate packed lunches. I hate lunch as a meal. It is the dumbest meal of the day. I wish I could plough through without needing lunch,) I present the recap of all the things I’ve done over the summer.

 I like lists. I like keeping lists. I like looking back at lists. It makes me feel as though I did something. I also realise that for many, these uncertain times weren’t great creatively, but in my case, it was the first time I had so much time to be creative. And I did a lot. Which, I’m quite amazed at.

 I’m only sharing this list as a personal log of sorts, not to flaunt what I did to make anyone feel bad. I used to do it on my LJ and I am one of those people who look back on old entries and such.  So, by all means, scroll past this very long list of things and carry on.

 On that note, good-bye freedom and spring-summer 2020. You were certainly different, but you gave me time to do so many wonderful things.  I can only hope that the shit fest called “school” turns out better than the fears that have been keeping me up at night.

 TV SERIES

-          Tangled s3

-          Steven Universe Future

-          Broadchurch 1 2 3 4

-          Family Ties 6 7

-          Twilight Zone

-          Welcome Back Kotter 1 2 3 4

-          Radio Enfer 2 3 4

-          Kim’s Convenience 1 2 3 4

-          Staged x2

-          Senpai Club

-          Good Omens

-          Dr Who 1 2 3 4 5

 BOOKS

-          Sticks and Scones

-          Sybil

-          Le chasseur de lapins

-          Paul à la maison

-          Le cahier bleu

-          Dear Edward

-          Me Elton John

  MOVIES

-          Bugs Life

-          Alice Through the Looking Glass

-          Maleficient

-          The Jersey Boys

-          Montreal Main

-          Baaria

-          Primaire

-          Menteur

-          Goon Le dernier des durs à cuire

-          1991

-          Pirates of the Carribean 1 2 3 4 5

-          Harry Potter 1 2 3 4 5 6 7a 7b

-          Megamind

-          Bon Cop Bad Cop 1 2

-          The Road to El Dorado

 ACTIVITIES

-          Hochelaga + Évasia x2

-          Old Port and Chinatown x2

-          Avenue Mt-Royal x3

-          Drogheria Fine [for gnocchi]

-          Wilensky’s

-          Eye glasses

-          Downtown x3

-          Jardin Botanique

-          Serres Lavoie

-          Maison Lavande

-          Marché Jean-Talon x2

-          Trou de beignes

-          Sushi x2

-          Marché Atwater x3

-          Swan Pedal Boats

-          Many bike rides

-          Chinese food x2

-          Pont Jacques Cartier at night

-          Meteor showers

-          Pink and Green House

-          Ice cream x57

-          Finished off 34 teas

-          Went swimming a few times

 FOOD

-          Orange cake x3

-          Pouding chomeur

-          Corn flour muffins

-          Pudding

-          El gran pudino

-          Peanut butter cookies x2

-          Cinnamon buns

-          Coconut cake

-          Fried rice

-          Rice with meat

-          Failed carrot muffins

-          Non failed carrot muffins

-          Cookies

-          Brownies x2

-          Tiramisu

-          Ice cream x3

-          Smoothie x3

-          Banana muffins

-          Arroz negro

-          Matcha latte x3

-          Risotto

-          Pierogies

-          Chicken parmigiana

-          Chocolate cake

 WRITING                      

-          Kesha Kee Taen

-          50+ new parts to Amnesia AU

-          Advanced Prince Au

-          Birthday Kisses

-          Birthday Wish

-          Birthday Gifts

-          Safe and Tucked Away

-          Fly me to the Moon

-          Reposted all of Perfect Cities + Typed out chapters that had never been typed out

-          Finished Olympic AU

-          Finished Witchcraft AU

-          Finished Love Potion AU

-          Hug Me [And Please Don’t Let Go]

-          Old T-Shirt

-          Vroom Vroom Tabarnak

-          Merry Little Christmas

-          Novelty Mug

-          Layers and Oranges

-          Photo-Photo

-          Curtain Call

-          Shall we Meet Again?

-          Mischief

-          Drag Meeting AU

-          Routine

-          Morning After

-          Girl You Really got me Now

  ART

-          Finished Brunch Asks

-          Re –coloured Christmas photo

-          Beach

-          Bathtub

-          10

-          Birthday boy

-          Cal Ét Wall Kiss

-          Chest Kiss

-          Cuddle

-          XXX Digital Version

-          Ed and Ét on a bed

-          Vive 375

-          El Dress

-          Embrace

-          Forehead Kiss

-          Hug

-          Hug 2

-          Hug Cheek

-          Kiss 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

-          Lingerie

-          Loony Bin

-          Cabaret

-          Cozy

-          Culinary Delights

-          Ice Cream

-          Rainbows

-          Marie series x23

-          Nose to Nose

-          Pan-Demi

-          Rock Band AU tshirt

-          Self Hug

-          Spring

-          Teacher Au

-          The future looks bright

-          T-Shirt

-          Twins

-          Sprawl

-          Uniform

-          Lingerie

-          Genderbend kiss

-          Prom

-          Back

-          Mercury

-          Fugly shorts and t-shirt

-          On a hâte de vous revoir

-          Back 2

-          Lingerie Touch

-          Novelty Mug

 PROJECTS

-          Finished going through the Spain photos + uploaded them

-          20 different video capsules

-          Cleaned out the drawers in guestroom and my room

-          Sorted out my bin of letters I’ve gotten since birth

-          Bought 39 new plants (and 9 more that are on the way) + took care of them

-          Cleaned out the bins of my stuff

-          Painted my nails x3

-          Made 3 rainbows for the window

-          Did Figuary 2020

-          Made 4 masks

-          Deep dusted the guestroom and my room x2

-          Coloured my mom’s hair

-          Made a photo album for my students

-          Cleaned out the bookcases downstairs + sorted out the books

-          Built 2 Billy bookcases

-          M3 yr4

-          Painted bookcases

-          Painted plant box

-          Made an Adipose

-          Duolingo [156 day streak. My friends made me realise last night that I restarted doing Duolingo when I went to visit them over their last reading week in February, after we helped out a Spanish speaking lady. It - put things in perspective. February feels like a different life and a different universe.]

-          Rehydrated 2 orchids

-          Put up picture frames

-          Got rid of 24 boxes at Village des valeurs

-          Sorted through photo albums

-          Learned how to make patterns on Photoshop

-          Started typing Grandpas family book

-          Labelled the shells

[mcforwhatiam]

For the 20th anniversary of To the 5 Boroughs, sharing a photoset from the tour in Manchester, UK, taken in December 2004 by Jenny Lewis.

Sorry for the markings/blur in places, it's the best I could get on these.

[potterandpromises]

91 and 99 for Garcy, please?

Failed Analysis

Set a few months post Chinatown. 

Summary: Lucy has been dropping subtle hints for months. Unfortunately, subtle isn’t Flynn’s style.

Content warning(s): Self-esteem issues, non-consensual cuddling, food, & one (1) murder joke. 

Also on AO3

Flynn wakes to a familiar warm weight curled into this chest. He resists the urge to brush the hair from her face, for fear of startling her, and for ending this moment too soon.

It’s become a habit, after a particularly difficult mission, or when she simply needs to talk, or be with another warm body, for them to sit and talk and fall asleep together. He feels a pang of guilt: she must have needed him last night.

7:03, the clock reads. The others will be up soon, and he briefly considers waking her. But she’s peaceful now and that’s a precious thing, for her and for him, given this tradition won’t last the storm. Hopefully whatever caused her to come here didn’t steal too much sleep. They’ll talk about it later, he decides.

The Mothership alarm goes off.

-

For once, no one died or was seriously injured, which is a success in and of itself. It was the easiest mission he can remember. So, he is moderately annoyed with his joints for aching: there is no good excuse.

(No, middle-age isn’t a good excuse.)

(And he really can’t consider what would happen if he truly got too old for this.)

Perhaps Lucy will want to watch a movie with him, as has become a part of their routine on the less heavy of days—

Lucy.

Lucy is… sitting on his bed, book in hand, and… wearing his sweater. Yup, definitely his sweater.

This isn’t the first time she’s borrowed clothing of his— she’d had to help him with his clothes and sling after Chinatown, and it had been advantageous to borrow something loose-fitting. Then there was the night she’d broken down sobbing, which ended with snot covered shirts. And, most recently before this, she’d just said she was cold. His sweaters look good on her. But he can’t comprehend the scene before him. Maybe she’s cold again, or wants comfort. But she has her own clothes. This time, there is no reason for her to want—

“I can leave if…”

“No, no,” he’s staring, and his stupid face burns, “I’m happy to have your company.” She smiles shyly, and makes room for him to join.

As Flynn settles next to her with his own book, he’s glad for the queen bed this newest safe house provides— not that he hated their last arrangement: Lucy atop his chest. But it didn’t lend itself to casual affairs: they couldn’t read, silently, separately, but together, as they do now.

Flynn doubts he’ll get much reading done at present, though. They still have to talk about this morning, and for that matter, her current choice of fashion. But her contentment is enough to delay it, leaving him to stew.

Is she ignoring what happened out of guilt? they’d talked about that. Embarrassment? they have to be past that by now, right? Denial; simple distress at the memory? Maybe she just wants to move on.

“Lucy?”

“Mm?”

“Are you okay?”

She stiffens next to him, and it’s barely felt. Then she sits up, and he follows her example, licks his lips and waits. He won’t push any further. After a moment, she closes her book with more care then necessary and stares at him, on guard, analyzing. He swallows, it’s been a long time since she’s looked at him like that.

“I’m fine,” she says slowly. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

He gestures vaguely, and she flashes a playful smile. It dies unreciprocated. ”Well, last night—” he starts. “You’ve been more…” he searches for a word that won’t sound accusatory, “affectionate—”

She laughs involuntarily. “Walt, is that what this is—” Something shifts, her smile fades. “Do you not… want that?”

Flynn doesn’t understand the question. Obviously, he doesn’t want her to be in a bad place. But that doesn’t seem to be what she’s asking.

Without an answer, she comes up with her own, and she looks devastated. He reaches out, but she’s already moving away, almost felling out of bed. “I’m sorry.” She’s wiping away tears. “I should go—”

She’s already at the door, and his chest is tight. “That wasn’t a criticism.” She stills, and with one hand on the doorknob, turns back to him. Her eyes hold weariness, and something he can’t name. “I enjoy your company,” he continues, wondering how she’s not internalized that, and knowing the answer. “I’m just… concerned.”

Relief visibly washes over her, and he can breath easier too, but it’s tainted with confusion. “So you— I should go.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I’ll see you later,” she promises, exiting in haste.

The bed creaks as Flynn falls back, exhausted and deeply bewildered.

-

At the top of the stairs, Flynn watches Lucy make tea, which she only drinks to self-soothe. He doesn’t like seeing her this way, but somehow, it’s reassuring to know he isn’t the only one still affected.

Despite his best efforts at analysis, he’s no closer to understanding what happened. It seemed she wasn’t coping well, and he confronted her about it. But clearly, he badly miss-read the situation. And as a result, led her to believe she wasn’t wanted, that what she did and needed was a burden. It was only for one, horrible moment, and he’s knowingly done far worse, but still, it weighs on him.

They need to talk, need to understand each other. Flynn takes a deep breath, tries to cast a friendly face, and steps on the squeaky board he ordinarily avoids on principle. Lucy looks up, then away, uncomfortable.

Okay.

He tries to catch her eye, to offer a smile. But she avoids it, causing Flynn to give preparing his cereal the same focus he affords missions against Rittenhouse.

“That milk is low.“ When he turns, she’s looking into her tea. “There’s a new carton behind the casserole.”

With some reluctance, he sits down across from her. And as she stares to his right at an unappealing mark on the well, Flynn rather wishes he were defusing a bomb. But it’s not like they can avoid each other for long, so: “Are we—”

“You really don’t get what I’ve been trying to convey these past few months.” He stares, and so does she. And before he can ask for clarification, she sighs, frustrated. “Do you honestly believe that I couldn’t ever have feelings for you?” it’s enough for him to short circuit, “Is that it?“

Her eyes are glistening now, and before he realizes it, one hand is halfway to her. But he stops dead, and his fingers close around nothing. He isn’t— she can’t possibly mean…

But there is no other way to take it.

(Is there?)

It’s happening again; except no one’s about to die, and her mother’s body is long decomposed, and Wyatt is fast asleep. And it wasn’t an accident this time, she could have given any number of half-truths or told him to drop it and he would have accepted that. But she wants him to know. She wants him.

(Why?)

“Flynn?”

“I thought…” It comes out croaked. “When I saw you taking with Wyatt after— you know,” but she doesn’t know, “I sort of assumed that was where you wanted to be. Long-term, romantically.“

“No.” She looks more defeated than ever. “No, that’s in the past. Why would you even think that?” There’s offence in her tone on the latter part, and he doesn’t blame her: she deserves better. But clearly, that isn’t how it works.

“Well, there’s certainly plenty of reasons not to,” a million, “but I know love isn’t always convenient— ”

“And I fall in love with you!” she bolts up and the chair scrapes violently against the floor, “Not him.”

Flynn is certain his heart has stopped; her’s too, by the way she recoils in on herself. And they stay like that, faces turning bright pink, Flynn distressingly aware of how someone probably heard that and they’ll have to ether explain themselves or bury some bodies. Then Lucy grabs her tea with enough uncoordinated force to spill it on herself. And he’s far too eager to fetch a towel.

He wants to leave, to process or maybe ignore this (in love), but you can’t unring a bell, and the last thing he wants is for her to think she’s scared him away. So instead, he hovers nearby as she dries her sleeve off and avoids his gaze.

“It could have been a bomb,” he points out.

“What?”

“Our misunderstanding, it could have been about a bomb.”

Her lips twitch, then she gives in to laughter. And when she looks up again, he does his best to reflect her glory in a reassuring smile. “What I’m I going to do with you?” There’s fondness, and love, love, in her bright eyes, the one thing he’d never, ever wanted to hope for. But he did, and she is here.

“Whatever you want.”

With pursed lips, she tilts her chin up. “How do you feel about ice cream?”

-

They lay on her bed, empty bowls temporarily abandoned in favor of cuddling without excuses or false assumptions. “You know, I thought you were flirting back, I mean I guess you were, since you do— “ love, he loves her, she’s known for awhile, “Like me.”

She’d had doubts about the exact nature of their relationship, but he’d made his feelings, his expressions when he thought she wouldn’t notice, difficult to honestly interpret as friendship. So, she thoroughly examined the evidence, as any good academic would, and concluded that the butterflies must be mutual. And last night, she worried she got it all wrong, read too much into it, saw what she wanted to see. But no, the last six months could not just be written off as a misunderstanding; rather, they’re just bad at this.

“This um, isn’t the first time I’ve done that.” Lucy shifts in order to rise her eyebrows at him. “Lorena casually said we were dating, and that was news to me. Good news.”

Half atop his chest, she laughs. Somehow, it feels good to know he’s always been like this.

She climbs upward, so she can rest, and feel his heartbeat under her cheek. “So you want to do this,” she murmurs, because she has to, “Not hiding thing?”

He’s silent too long, and despite all the evidence, she’s scared. “Yes, my love.”

[mcforwhatiam]

Thanks for the gifs @rhyme-the-rhyme-well , this Yauch is so 😍

[x] Thanks @lilihornblower for sharing this vid!

[clowngremlin]

it’s time for a good things list, babey!!! under the cut because it’s a couples days worth of Good Things!!!

we’re starting with tuesday july 23rd:

-hung out with flynn and watched tcm

-got Vietnamese food from my favorite place

-my legal name change went thru!!!

-wore an excellent outfit that i didnt get photos of because i looked sick but i can always wear the outfit again

i was sick so it wasnt like super great and i had some bad feelings and a fight with my dad, but looking back on it, it wasnt as bad as i thought!!

wednesday july 24th:

-went to therapy and had a really good session!!! my therapist said some things that really helped me!!

-went to trans group with is always fun!!!

-was still over the moon happy about legally being spencer jimmy garfield

-felt just really happy and positive that day!!

-wore an excellent outfit and my hair looked good

thursday july 25th:

-didnt feel as sick as before

-went to go hand in my gender marker change form

-got a certain type of clown i collect from the thrift store

-talked to many friends!!

not much happened on thursday tbh

friday july 26th:

-my sister came over for dinner!!! it was nice to see her!!!

-my dad made a really good stew for dinner!!!!

-i got ice cream

-hope and i talked on the phone

not much happened on friday either tbh

saturday july 27th:

-went to the flea market and around vancouver with one of the Youths from group!! we went to grandville island, chinatown, and to the beach to watch fireworks!!

-i got the BEST earrings for $1 per pair at the fleamarket....one is rainbow squares that the lady selling them referred to as “pride earrings” which made me happy because she was so excited to show them to me because she saw my rainbow belt....im used to people assuming im gay in public and being mean to me, so it was so nice that she was nice and excited about it.....and the other pair is like a neon orange 80s triangle thing.....they’re SO funky....and for $1 each...wrow....

-got a EXCELLENT little clown for $1....will post him later....

-got an Weird Little Dude Clown....my friend saw him and was like “IT’S U, U HAVE TO GET HIM!!” and he was $4.....an excellent purchase....

-i didnt spend all my money at the flea market which was nice!!

-got iced coffees twice

-went 2 my favorite stores in chinatown!!! got a funny bart simpson pen at one, and at another, my pal got a funky shirt that he was so excited about and loves, and then at the last one, we found my exact shirt i was wearing but in pink!!! it was funny

-went to a neat rock store at grandville island....got to wander around a Rock Room....

-also went to a cool store where they custom make shirts and all sorts of other things and im gonna go back there when i have some extra money!!!

-went to the beach and walked around without shoes and socks which is HUGE for me because i HATE being barefoot but it was nice!!! the water was really warm!!

-had some really good talks with my friend and he said some really nice things to me!!! it made me feel good to know that like i actually help people and that i have a really welcoming and warm presence and by like being myself and wearing funky clothing, it makes him feel like he can be himself too!!!

-had the best pizza i have ever had

-saw fireworks!!! they were like so amazing and pretty and it was a lot of fun!!!

all in all, yesterday was like such an amazing and fun day and one of the best ones i’ve had in a while!!!!

[canaryatlaw]

okay, well today was good. up at 8:15 for our monthly justice center session, which went well. after that roommate and I ordered breakfast and ate that, then departed to the kpop store in Chinatown to see if they had the kep1er album, but sadly they didn't, so we left their empty handed, but stopped for bubble tea/ice cream (it's a bubble tea and rolled ice cream place) before leaving Chinatown. We were still on the hunt though, so we ended up driving up to a town in the northern suburbs that has a kpop store. they also didn't have the album, but roommate got another one for a band she likes. we walked around the mall for a little bit afterwards, I grabbed a wonder woman shirt that was on clearance at boxlunch, so that was good. once we'd finished looking at all the stores we were interested in, we drove over to the cracker barrel that's up there and had an early dinner. drove back after that, unfortunately stomach started hurting quite badly about halfway through, though I don't think it was the food, just my body being a pain because it's like that sometimes. we stopped at target so I could use the bathroom, then just went home after that. I suffered for a while after that, but it eventually evened out thankfully, and I spent the rest of the night with my heating pad, so that helped. we ended up watching the first episode of produce 48, which was the precursor to GP999 and had a few contestants on both shows, including a girl who went on to debut in kep1er, so that was fun to watch. and yeah, we finished that and I then showered and got ready for bed, and now I'm here. Getting up early for church tomorrow and I'm pretty tired, so I'm going to go to bed now. Goodnight friends. Hope you had an awesome Saturday.

[tripstaysnoided]

Seasons Tag

Thanks @atashi77 and @nickysimblr for wondering what I think.

1. What is your favorite season?

Fall, the start of sweater weather! I also live in Massachusetts so we get peak autumn foliage and pick-your-own apple orchards everywhere (and apple cider doughnuts, my fave!).

2. Do you prefer warmer or colder weather?

Definitely cold. I have way too many long pants and shirts with sleeves.

3. What do you do on a 🌧️ day?

Usually stay inside but it’s also the perfect weather to walk a mile and a half and get takeout and beer in.

4. How is a typical winter where you live? Cold or not?

Very cold and very snowy, though we just get Great Lakes/Midwestern leftovers like that.

5. Have you ever experienced snow?

Every year...most recently it was while waiting in a plane in St. Paul though. I was stuck for four hours with nothing but my laptop, snacks, and a frat guy from the University of Michigan next to me (he was okay).

6. True or false? “I 😍 🌧️!”

A half truth. I like cloudy weather more.

7. What is your go to food in the summer?

I don’t change my diet season to season but I associate summer with weekend trips to Boston/Cambridge and my favorite vegan restaurants as my lunch or dinnertime reward. If you’re ever in the area and feeling vegan: My Thai Vegan Cafe in Chinatown, Cuong’s Vegan Sandwiches in Chinatown, Veggie Galaxy in Central Square, Cambridge. (The Chubby Chickpea food truck is a good runner-up with its falafel wrap)

8. What is your favorite 🍨 flavor?

I judge every ice cream shop by its vanilla first, since you can’t cover up shitty ice cream with vanilla only. Plus I really like vanilla ice cream. I also like anything with coffee or peanut butter, if obviously not together.

This is just for a specific shop, but the Fomu chain in Boston has some unique, light flavors like Lavender and Earl Grey shortbread. Not many other shops even dare to try and go that subtle.

9. Coffee, tea or cocoa? EVERYTHING?

I drink two cups of coffee a day and about three to five of tea. Hot cocoa is an occasional treat and that’s it.

10. Describe your favorite seasonal clothing item!

Fleece-lined leggings, extra sweaters.

11. What is your favorite Holiday?

Christmas Eve, because I get to drink because I get to meet the family that I’m actually friendly with and have a jolly good time.

12. If you were a season, which one would you be?

Fall, playing some Type O Negative and smelling vaguely like smoke.

Idk. Atashi tagged everyone I wanted to.