#Chester just wants to bite smbdy 😔

[not-5-rats]

I've been feeling sad recently (dw I'm just upset cause I'm sick lol, think I'm coming down with a cold :P), so now Chester has to suffer for it -

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Chester was alone

Well not physically, there's always somebody around to talk to but he still felt lonely. He was always hanging out with somebody, always going into town with them, laughing with them, enjoying their company yet he still felt alone

He appreciated the other Bugs, truly, they meant alot to him but he was worried. He didn't want to laugh with them, he didn't want to like them because he didn't want to get attached to any of them. He knew with the way they lived all the Bugs were constantly at risk of harm, if the Hunters ever found them it could end with his friends' deaths...if he grew attached this would hurt...well more than it would hurt anyways

He put up walls, he would still stick around, hang out with other Bugs but he refused to open up with them...he couldn't risk it...he couldn't risk losing another loved one. He promised himself he wouldn't love anyone ever again, he tried to remove the feeling from his heart...but there was somebody that wouldn't let that happen

Everytime Chester saw them his heart began to attack him, he could feel it kicking his chest, trying to escape...run to the one he admired. Whenever they were near Chester couldn't look away they were the only thing he could focus on.

They made him feel stupid, he was constantly embarrassing himself infront of them because they made him so fucking nervous. He once confused a Alstroemeria for a Lily because he happened to notice them across the garden! He could barely think when he was near them because he was so scared of messing up

He tried so hard to lock his feelings up, he tried to ensure that he never felt this feeling ever again, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't block them out. He adored them, he hated them for it, he hated how enamoured they made him feel...he hated how much he loved them

He was lonely

Lonely because he couldn't admit how much he loved them

Lonely because he refused to let himself care

Lonely because he couldn't let himself have the one thing he wanted

Couldn't let himself be near the one he craved to be around

Until he was allowed to embrace the one he adored he would always be lonely </3