#Charms Seven Carat | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lily-blue · 3 years ago

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13 reasons why | reason no.4: it’s the perfect place to fall in love

☆ characters: lawyer!jeonghan & regular customer!you (Yoohyeon - ‘95 liner) ☆ genre: coffee shop au, humour ☆ summary: you have a crush on Jeonghan’s best friend, but this doesn’t mean you’re safe from his charms. especially when he gets his mind set on you. ☆ words: 11,6k ☆ massive thank you: to @dat-town for proofreading this chapter ♥ i’m forever grateful for you ☆ taglist: @soobin-chois

➼ chapter index

You had moved to the capital city, more than three hours away from your family and best friend, in hope of finding inspiration and an opportunity to turn your long-cherished hobby into a job. It had taken some time. Especially because writing books under a publishing agency had turned out to be nothing like writing for an online community. It was more demanding that could easily led even the most talented authors to writer’s blocks.

After your second dystopian book, Red Sun, had received a fairly positive reaction from the targeted audience, the pressure to write a hit had started to poison your creativity and turned your home office into a room that was slowly suffocating you instead of inspiring you with its beautiful scenery and pastel walls. What had previously pushed you to write full chapters with witty dialogues and fun albeit complex characters distracted you all of a sudden. It also made you question each paragraph you forced out of yourself even though that wasn’t necessarily a part of your job but your publisher’s reader’s. You should have written with confidence and at a much efficient speed.

When the realisation that your writer room was your enemy had hit you, your first reaction had been a mild mental breakdown. You had been scared of turning into a failure. You see, you had never liked writing outside of your room. Back at home, you couldn’t have even written a full page in your terrace or in the living room and then you had been working on 5-10k long fics for free entertainment.

Visiting public libraries, parks and coffee shops had become your new free time activity until one day you had stumbled upon a homey café called Coffee Carat and sipping on your black coffee, the urge to fill pages with your ideas had come back to you.

Nowadays, you spent at least five to seven hours at the coffee shop almost every day, content with your progress and the delicious goods you could be munching on during your stay. You liked the scenery of the park on the other side of the huge windows and how the workers never made you feel unwelcome when you didn’t feel like refilling your cup. You liked the friendly atmosphere and how you were already familiar with most of their regulars since you were one of them. Each day, hovering over your keyboard at Coffee Carat was like coming to work and staying at home at the same time. It sparked your productivity.

You were in the middle of a semi-detailed description about your protagonist’s thoughts on her future love interest when your fingers came to a halt in mid-sentence. With a blank facial expression, you shifted your gaze from your laptop’s screen to the sweet latte that a familiar, blonde man slid closer to you on your table.

As far as you knew, he wasn’t one of the baristas. He might have walked around in the coffee shop as if he had owned it, but he never wore a uniform.

‘Here, it’s on me,’ he stated with a smug grin, making you wonder whether it was a first for him or he had a habit of walking up to random women, throwing his money out the window just to pay for their drinks. He definitely fitted the playboy stereotype with his bleached hair, confident demeanour and those playful glints in his chocolate brown eyes.

However, if you had been right, he was either a sloppy one (as there was a half-empty cup of black coffee behind your laptop) or he had taken interest in you recently which would have been weird considering his friend group. Wasn’t he the same man you had seen with Josh and that girl who babied every staff member of this place all the time?

‘Thanks,’ you spoke up in a neutral voice when the silence started to feel too heavy. Because while you weren’t a big fan of sweet drinks, you had more cons against telling him the truth than pros. For one, he could have misunderstood you and called you rude in front of other customers - including Josh - that you would have rather avoided.

Your plan was to ask one of the baristas after the blonde man left whether they wanted your free drink to not let it go to waste, but before you could have turned back to your laptop, he pulled out the chair on the opposite side of the table, sat down and placed his chin on his right palm, observing you. So you took the cup in your hand and drank a little from the chocolate flavoured latte, praying that this was what he was waiting for, hence had no further business at your table.

It wasn’t that you weren’t friendly. You had a few close friends at home and you were also on good terms with your publisher. Sometimes, when there weren’t too many customers in the shop, you asked Seokmin about his day and listened to his fun stories about the others while your fingers were taking a break after all that writing. You had no problem with socialising, but this man tried to buy your time with something you didn’t particularly like and acted as though you knew him. Shouldn’t he have introduced himself first? Or asked you whether that seat was taken? Whether you had time for him?

‘You know, you could have walked up to us,’ he started as soon as your eyes met, disinterest written all over your face. It took you a moment to realise what he was talking about, but once his words registered in you, you needed every bit of your self-control to not bite into your lower lip like a fool. Oh. Oh! So they had caught you staring at Josh while you were brainstorming for the current scene in your story. That explained a lot. ‘I don’t bite.’

Keeping your eyes on him and holding onto your nonchalant facade, there were two things you could choose from. You could deny everything and ask him to leave, but then there was a big possibility he would tell Josh that you were not just a stalker, but a liar, too. Or you could pretend that staring at them wasn’t a big deal and keep going on with your life without embarrassing yourself further. For obvious reasons, you found the second option a lot more appealing.

Therefore, you took another small sip from the chocolate latte as a sign of gratitude and tried your best to shut out the unpleasant, sweet taste that remained on the tip of your tongue.

‘You’re a nice friend,’ you acknowledged with a polite smile that didn’t reach your eyes.

Based on your previous encounters with Joshua Hong, you would have never pegged him as someone shy, but it was also true that the two of you had never talked longer than a couple of minutes. Your story was like every typical meet-cute. He had swept you off your feet with his charming smile after he had mistaken your order with his, then bought you a cupcake to make up for the inconvenience. Apparently, his boldness back then and ever since didn’t mean he didn’t need a wingman to get the girl.

And while his choice of wingman was questionable, as your gaze pierced a hole between the blonde man’s eyes, you couldn’t say you hated the sudden improvement in your relationship. If anything, you were excited despite your calm smile.

‘I’m not sure what that has to do with the current situation, but I’ll let you know I’m much more than a nice friend. I’m an awesome friend,’ he claimed with his chin held high, proud like a child who was ready to do anything to receive more compliments. It was kind of lovely of him which made you wonder whether you should have used this side of him for inspiration as well. Your main character’s best friend might have appreciated more unique traits. He was still a bit two dimensional.

You quickly jotted down a few pointers in your online document, then turned back to the man and offered him a shrug.

‘You just said I could have walked up to you. Believe it or not, not many are so willing to be the third wheel even if it’s about their closest friends,’ you enlightened him, finding it a tad bit weird that this wasn’t obvious for him when really, you had never encountered anyone who hadn’t frowned at the thought of being the third wheel. Even you, who thought of being single as an opportunity to pave your own path rather than a state you should have changed in your twenties, hated the concept. Everyone did. Except the blonde man, so it seemed. ‘And you even came here to tell me all this.’

Josh’s friend, whose name you still weren’t familiar with, had a small tilt to his head while his gaze loitered over you with a barely visible furrow between his brows. At that moment, he looked both like a predator and a prey. The mere sight urged you to draft out his character for your later works.

‘Just to be clear…’ he started while you were staring at his right eyebrow that he raised either intentionally or unintentionally. His tone was screaming his previous, smug confidence, but his eyes told a completely different story. Was he nervous? Embarrassed? ‘You were staring at me back there, weren’t you?’

You wanted to tell him that no, you hadn’t. But to be fair, you couldn’t have sworn on your life that your eyes hadn’t lingered on him while you had been spacing out. You didn’t want to make him feel bad in case you had given him false signs. Even if his interpretation pushed you out of your comfort zone for numerous reasons starting with the fact that he was Josh’s friend.

‘I mean, I can’t say for sure that there wasn’t any moment when I was looking at you,’ you opted for the truth, willing yourself to look at him while you were talking. You preferred to clear up the misunderstanding immediately instead of dragging it out and acting bashful. You didn’t need him to think you were playing hard to get or worse! That you were lying because you were shy.

‘But?’

Your hands fell from the table into your lap and your knuckles turned white when you found your stable point in the firm grip you had on the hem of your loose, white shirt. This whole situation started to feel like when you were visiting your dentist and she told you that you had cavities. Yes, in plural.

‘I was looking at Josh. You know, because we have this thing,’ you explained in a neutral voice to avoid coming off too cocky. Truth to tell, it felt wrong that you were the one who broke this piece of information down to him when he had claimed to be an awesome friend. Shouldn’t he have known about your history with Josh then? Since you knew for a fact that men could be just as gossipy as women were if not more.

‘What thing?’ He raised a brow while he leaned his back against the backrest of his chair, not taking his eyes off you. At that point, looking at his linked arms, you wouldn’t have been too surprised if this whole interaction had turned out to be a test. Was he doubting that you were good enough for Josh? Was this a game to him?

To collect your messy thoughts, you reached for your own cup of coffee and took a refreshing sip from the bitter beverage to make a statement: you knew what and who you liked and your loyalty couldn’t have been bought with a few sweet words.

‘Well, it might not be the best word to use, but we kinda have a crush on each other,’ you said before the challenge in his posture could have enveloped you in awkward silence. You would have been a fool to let him intimidate you.

‘Do you?’ He asked still, pushing you with his tone. Your natural reaction would have been to raise one brow, but you didn’t. Instead, you kept your cool, because if you had learned anything during your childhood, it was that not reacting to certain things the way people expected you to was a strong enough weapon. ‘What makes you think that he has a crush on you?’

You didn’t like his confidence. You didn’t like the smile in the corner of his mouth. And you for sure didn’t like the implication that you might have been mistaken about Josh’s feelings for you. But you swallowed down your annoyance and refused to avoid his piercing gaze.

‘Just to pick one example from many. On Valentine’s Day, he was standing three people ahead of me in the line when suddenly, our gazes met,’ you started, voice stable albeit unamused. As someone who was not only in love with stories like yours with Josh, but tried to make a living from writing them, you should have felt ashamed by how lifeless you sounded while you recited the telltale, but you didn’t. This time, you weren’t aiming for entertainment. ‘We couldn’t exchange more than small smiles because he was in a hurry, but when I got to the counter I got a free cupcake,’ you said, feeling warm and mushy inside from the memory. You remembered how awful your agency had made those weeks for you, forcing you to write short story after short story about textbook tropes just to keep your social media platform active with their excellent idea of a holiday series. You had been drained by the time the actual holiday had arrived. So Josh’s kindness had meant more than a simple gesture.

But his friend seemingly didn’t understand the importance this incident held for you or the correlation between the two happenings, because he looked at you as if you had been wearing a clown costume.

‘He bought that cupcake for me,’ you helped him put two and two together before you took another sip from your black coffee and turned back to your laptop.

You didn’t mean to anger him. You just didn’t like when someone who hadn’t even bothered to introduce himself to you acted as though he knew better. Not necessarily because you were one of those people who believed that they could never be wrong, but because he was super cocky about being right. And this characteristic in a stranger didn’t sit well with you. Who was he to walk up to you so suddenly with a cup of disgustingly sweet drink and turn your world upside down?

When he stood up, chair cracking behind him, a teeny-tiny part of you wanted to apologise for your own attitude, but the moment you lifted your head and looked at him, he rolled his chocolate brown eyes and you made up your mind. You didn’t have to be the bigger person in every conversation. Especially when you were dealing with someone like him.

‘No, he didn’t,’ he scoffed before he placed both of his hands on the table and leaned closer to your personal space. ‘You got that cupcake because the barista thought you looked lonely. It’s all about marketing,’ he claimed, clearly enjoying his little victory; the subtle crack in your composed demeanour. You had no doubt that your eyes shone differently after the revelation. But you did an excellent job at putting yourself together in a matter of seconds.

The two of you kept eye contact for a while before you decided to acknowledge the news with a small nod instead of questioning his credibility. After all, you weren’t one who put up a fight when it was heading nowhere. And while you would have liked to think that he was a bluff, you knew that you didn’t know Josh as much as you would have liked to believe. While he was his friend.

Seeing your resignation, the blonde man clicked his tongue and narrowed his eyes. His voice was quiet albeit firm when he gave you the final blow:

‘And just so you know, Joshua is seeing someone else.’

With that being said, he pushed himself further from the table, dusted off his palms as though he had just finished a day of endless work, then turned his back to you. He didn’t look back as he walked back to his friend nor did he spare you a glance when Josh’s giggles blended in the buzzing atmosphere.

You didn’t write much after your conversation.

It would have been a lie to say that you weren’t thinking of Josh and his faceless girl for long days after that afternoon, because you were. Yet, there were hardly enough hours in a lifetime that could have prepared you for the sight of their affectionate duo weeks after your weird encounter with your (apparently) one-sided crush’s friend. Witnessing their innocent kisses in public, right in front of your usual order, felt like a kick in your stomach. And the worst part was that you couldn’t take your eyes off them.

You couldn’t turn away.

It hurt, but not in the way you would have expected it to wound you. It paralysed your body, but the cogs in your head were spinning at an inhuman speed. Hence, at one point, instead of those signs you had read incorrectly, all you could think about was how you could have saved yourself from this situation if you had believed his friend. Then, you wouldn’t have spent so many nights convincing yourself that Josh’s smiles had meant the same as yours.

It was the familiar, quiet clink of a porcelain cup that pulled you back to the present world. A smug grin and a pair of chocolate brown eyes that made you snap your head towards the new fill of black coffee on your table.

You furrowed your brows in confusion. You didn’t remember ordering a refill yet since your own cup was still half full. Had one of the baristas mistaken your ta…

‘You’re just making it worse for yourself,’ a familiar voice stated, pulling your attention at its owner who was casually leaning against the chair across from you. The blonde man kept his eyes on the couple, but you could see it in the barely noticeable changes of his body language that his focus was on you. ‘And I’m sure you don’t want them to catch you staring, either.’

You didn’t want that. He was right about that. So you turned back to your laptop and tried to keep your mind busy with the world you had created for your characters. Currently, you were working on a dystopian soulmate system and the scene you had just seen, the feelings you had just felt might have been able to help you portray your two protagonists’ situation more accurately.

You were determined to make something positive out of the bitterness and the disappointment that poisoned your otherwise dull day.

The blonde man took a seat on the chair he had been leaning against and linked his arms in front of his chest. The pout on his lips made it obvious that he was trying to solve the mystery that was you, but you didn’t think too much into the attention he was suddenly giving you. He wasn’t the first person who got intrigued or upset because of your attitude and just like any other time, you were sure his fleeting interest would subside with time. It always did.

‘Have anyone ever told you that your reactions are pretty anticlimactic?’ He asked when he eventually put his elbows on the table and intertwined his fingers so that he could rest his chin on top of them.

You were conflicted whether you should have ignored him, asked him to leave you alone or entertained his curiosity, but ended up choosing the latter simply because considering your previous encounter you knew that he wouldn’t leave that easily. He also seemed like the type who was used to getting whatever he wanted - either because of his charming looks or due to his hard work - and would have rather annoyed you until you snapped than let you ignore him after he had made the effort to walk up to you.

‘Not with this word,’ you replied as briefly as possible, refusing to give him too much of your time as you had already known the end of your story. He liked the thrill, the excitement, the games. You had no doubt about it that he had come up to you to see your sour face from the front row after the slap and stayed because he hadn’t gotten it.

He was going to leave as soon as he got to know you. You had no delusions this time.

‘Aren’t you upset?’ He asked next, confirming your thoughts way too soon, way too easily. It was like he didn’t even bother to hide his real intentions. And in a twisted way, it was almost refreshing.

‘I am,’ you admitted plainly instead of going into details to avoid future misunderstandings. It was something you would have done in many other cases, but he didn’t need to know how you weren’t sure what made you more upset. Your own foolishness, Josh’s mixed signals or the fact that he had told you so, yet the iconic line still hadn’t left his mouth.

The faint chatters of other customers mixed together in the background and filled the silence that settled between the two of you. It wasn’t as uncomfortable as it should have been, you had to admit at least that much, but you had always preferred working on your books without an audience and that hadn’t changed. You got distracted even by the least interesting things too easily to have any company.

‘What are you working on, anyway?’ The blonde man asked, his determination earning a few brownie points from you although your face was devoid of strong emotions.

You took your hands off the keyboard and looked at the black coffee next to your half-empty cup. There was no sweet latte this time, just your usual order. It meant he had either asked the baristas about your favourite drink this time or remembered. Both options screamed care and you wondered whether he had brought it for you to comfort you after the heartache.

It piqued your curiosity, too. The paradox in his motives. So you took the warmer cup in your hands and took a sip from the coffee. It tasted like it always did. It clearly wasn’t a part of a well-calculated plan for revenge. Therefore, you turned towards him and kept your gaze on his face, thinking.

‘Do you want to get to know me?’ You asked, although it was more like an unsure statement. You couldn’t see any other reason for his actions, but you had mistaken his friend’s kindness for affection from the get-go, so your faith in your observing skills reasonably dropped.

‘What? You say I cannot want that?’ He scoffed, most probably, because of the tone you had used. It wasn’t intentional. Not knowing enough about him or even his name, your mind put him into the stranger category and your walls were always thicker around strangers. There were only a handful of people in your life who knew how you were when you were carefree. ‘That just makes me more determined.’

And he wasn’t lying. Because soon after this claim, he threw question after question at you about what you were doing on your laptop all the time. He pestered you until you told him that you were an author and that you were working on your next book. Then, he annoyed you a bit more to coax complex sentences out of you instead of those curt answers you constantly gave him. He said he wanted to get to know you and how your brain worked. You reminded him that curiosity killed the cat.

If you wanted to be completely honest, you enjoyed yourself during your conversation more than you showed on the surface. There was something about Jeonghan - yes, he had finally gotten to introduce himself when he had remembered that he hadn’t known your name, either - that made you warm up to him despite your better judgement. However, it was still too soon to consider him anything but trouble. Hence, when Josh called for him from their table, you didn’t keep him at yours. You simply said your goodbye and turned back to your laptop, casually sipping on the cold coffee he had brought for you.

You didn’t seek Jeonghan’s friendship actively and you wouldn’t have said that he did yours, either. Yet, somehow you became a member of his close friend group and none of the others questioned why you started to sit with them in the coffee shop when you were taking a break from writing.

‘Here,’ Jeonghan said as he placed a cup of black coffee in front of you along with a seasonal cupcake that had the weirdest texture of all time yet tasted like summer days by the beach. It had tiny watermelon pieces in its dough which in itself was crazy, because you would have never thought that this fruit could have been put anywhere near an oven, but no matter how many times you tried to find out the secret behind their slightly juicy texture - shouldn’t they have been super dry? -, Seungcheol gave you no explanation. A part of you was convinced that he had absolutely no idea, either.

‘Thanks,’ you said with a small nod before you reached out for the prettily decorated One In a Melon and took a small bite from the still lukewarm dessert. Until you hadn’t been included in the ‘95 liner group, you hadn’t paid too much attention to the dorky names of each baked goods on the menu, but since you had gotten to know Hoyeon, you made sure to appreciate her creativity and her interesting sense of humour. Which meant that you started calling the cupcakes you ate on their names instead of describing them to the baristas behind the counter. Especially when she was around.

‘Where’s Joshua? Shouldn’t he be here by now?’ Seungcheol asked when he finally left his office to join your trio for a drink and some sweets before leaving for the movies in about an hour. It was supposed to be a ‘95 liner only programme that Hoyeon had been hyping up for you since last week, but that meant that Joshua’s girlfriend - who was two years younger than you - wasn’t included which left you with an odd taste in your mouth. You knew that couples didn’t have to do everything together, but you couldn’t get rid of the thought that this rule had been established because of Soyeon.

You stole a glance at Jeonghan from behind your coffee cup and kept your eyes on him until he shot a playful smile at you with a smug shrug. He didn’t seem to mind the younger girl’s absence nor did he seem surprised by Joshua’s. His entire attitude made you feel as if you had been missing the bigger picture.

‘I’ll call h…’ Hoyeon offered with her phone in her hands when a quiet ping drew everyone’s attention to Seungcheol.

With your lips around the edge of the porcelain, you watched as the guy’s happy smile turned upside down upon seeing the message he had received, although his gloomy mood didn’t take too long. At least, on the surface. You obviously couldn’t tell just yet when he was hiding his negative emotions from other people or whether he was the type to put on a show in public to begin with.

‘He isn’t coming,’ he said calmly, making his girlfriend pout with his words. The confused furrow between Hoyeon’s eyes resembled your own while you were patiently waiting for an explanation. ‘He just texted us. Something about a surprise date.’

It would have been a lie to say that you didn’t feel disappointed, but it wasn’t as bitter as you would have described it in any of your main characters’ case. It didn’t tug on your insides nor did it pierce through your heart. It didn’t even leave an unpleasant aftertaste in your mouth. You accepted it between two sips of coffee, then nodded to signal this to the others.

You clicked your tongue when Jeonghan stole a piece from your cupcake, but let him do so without putting up a fight, because unlike your drink, it was on the house which meant that it wasn’t strictly yours. At least, according to your logic.

‘What do you think?’ The blonde man asked after a second stolen bite. He leaned his elbows on top of the table and tilted his head in question as he shifted his gaze from Seungcheol to Hoyeon. ‘How long will he be ghosting us this time?’

Even with your limited knowledge about these people, it wasn’t hard to assemble the pieces. You could have walked up to their table five minutes ago and it would have been still as clear as day that they were talking about Joshua.

You kept your eyes on the man right next to you.

‘Three months,’ came the answer from Seungcheol, making you question the morals of their conversation. Especially when Jeonghan failed to hide the small, amused twitch in the corner of his mouth from you. Was this a game to him? Was their friend’s relationship a game to all of them?

‘Two and a half. They’ve already been together for a month now. Three is too long,’ Hoyeon shared her own opinion, earning a pleased hum from the blonde man. You might have never been in a serious relationship, but even you could tell that four or three months weren’t that long. Meanwhile, Joshua seemed too committed for them to have so little faith in him.

‘Four more weeks. The winner can kick everyone out of the apartment three times without giving any explanation,’ Jeonghan bargained, his posture and confidence fueling his friends’ spirit in ways you had never witnessed before.

You knew from Jeonghan that he still lived with his friends because it was more convenient, but you were also aware how thin the walls were at their apartment, so you weren’t surprised to hear his proposal. However, a part of you was curious whether he would have considered it a win-win suggestion or he would have done everything in his power to have the privilege to kick the lovebirds out of their place. You genuinely hoped he wouldn’t have sabotaged one of his best friends’ relationship for a stupid bet. You still weren’t a hundred percent sure when it came to him. (Though, he definitely wasn’t a bad person.)

‘He looks happy with Soyeon, though. Isn’t it a bit rude to make a bet on their hypothetical break-up?’ You asked plainly, hoping that they didn’t think you were judging them. You did not agree with their behaviour, but you didn’t know them for too long, therefore you weren’t aware of their shared history. You might have liked Joshua’s kind heart, but assuming that he had never done the same thing before was wrong as it was baseless.

‘Nah, he knows we do this all the time,’ Hoyeon chirped in light-heartedly, her smile urging you to believe her. So you did and allowed yourself a nod in her direction before you drank a bit more of your coffee. ‘So, are you in?’

You shook your head and declined the opportunity wordlessly. Mostly, because you knew yourself and it would have made you feel guilty from the moment the predicted time period fell from your lips. Partly, because you lived alone and didn’t wish to kick anyone out of their home.

When one of the waiters, Minghao, walked up to your table to collect the empty plates and cups, you said thank you for his hard work and asked him to pack you a few cupcakes to go that you would pay for at the counter before leaving. Your best friend from your hometown would arrive at your place with the last train and stay at yours for a couple of days. Knowing her, her disorganised personality and the high possibility that she might have skipped dinner to catch the vehicle despite her last minute packing, she would appreciate the cupcakes for midnight snacks before going to bed.

‘Just watch. This will be such an easy win. I just know when two people aren’t meant to be,’ Jeonghan claimed proudly, earning a scoff from Minghao that caught your attention, too. You turned back towards the Chinese waiter just in time to see him roll his eyes with no malice in his action.

‘Says the man who told Chan to go for one night stands instead of pursuing his crush. Yeseo wouldn’t be his girlfriend now if he listened to you,’ he commented while he put the empty cups on his tray one by one. You had never heard about this Chan before, but as a regular, you knew who Yeseo was and you had already seen the smiley girl with her boyfriend, so you could put faces to their names.

‘Unrelatable,’ the blonde man grumped at his friend, his behaviour tugging on the corner of your mouth lightly. Although, you were too good at masking your feelings for him to notice your amusement.

It remained hidden throughout your friendly movie date along with your happiness when he offered to (stated that he would) take you home.

Even though you never voiced it out, you were grateful to Jeonghan for making you a part of his friend group. Not just because this way, you could slowly get to know the real Joshua who was immensely more complex than you had assumed based on your previous interactions, but also because ever since they had taken you in, your motivation to write was on another level. They inspired you with the most mundane things in the world such as their mischievousness, those childish pranks they constantly pulled on each other and their caring side as well, like when Seungcheol had a mild mental breakdown over a two-day-long delay in supplies due to a wrongly filled order form or something.

You still didn’t consider yourself a close friend of theirs, but you were slowly getting there. If anything could have proved this, then the fact that you didn’t feel uncomfortable around them anymore without Jeonghan’s presence. In fact! You had already been on two girly dates with Hoyeon who might have been a bit too enthusiastic to promote Freefall’s biscuits and bubble teas to you considering with whom she was dating.

This time, you were once again alone in the shop, following your old routines and working on your book, whose first chapters were up to your publisher’s liking, when someone walked up to you and placed a cup of black coffee next to your laptop. Your first thought was that Han somehow finished at the court an hour earlier than he had promised or that he had lied about his working hours on purpose to take you by surprise - it wouldn’t have been a first; he never stopped trying to coax a reaction out of you -, but when your gaze shifted to the culprit, his characteristic smile wasn’t playful but kind.

‘I saw you when I got here and Seungkwan said you haven’t ordered a refill in two hours,’ Joshua said as though he owed you an explanation when in reality, he didn’t. Not to mention that you were physically unable to say no for free drinks or be mad at anyone who approached you with your favourite.

‘Thanks. I guess, I got too immersed in the current chapter to realise that my cup is empty,’ you admitted with a smile before you encouraged him to take a seat in case he had time. You really couldn’t have been sure with him as his friends had been right. He spent less and less time around them, thus at the coffee shop, the more serious his relationship with Soyeon got. Not that you blamed him. Because while you couldn’t see yourself do the same in a similar setting, in a way, it was somewhat natural that he prioritised his girlfriend over other people, wasn’t it? It was a part of who he was.

‘Anytime,’ he answered with a sheepish smile.

Joshua didn’t take a seat across from you, nor did he on your side. Instead, he kept standing while he asked you about your plans for the day. Unlike the others, he had no idea that your friend had gone back to your hometown last night which meant you had absolutely no plans if writing and grabbing something spicy for dinner at your favourite diner weren’t ones. You led a pretty mundane life despite how adventurous you appeared to be in everyone’s eyes whom you had left behind when you had left Busan.

It was almost funny, though, when it was your turn to inquire about him. Since one statement, one innocent observation from you:

‘You look happy,’ was enough for him to chat your ears off about his girlfriend.

He told you about their last date in that fancy restaurant she liked, the necklace he had bought for her for their second month together and the amusement park date they would finally go on after endless weeks of constant persuasion. He was actually waiting for Soyeon, because they had agreed on meeting here and grabbing snacks for the ride before they headed to Everland in Yongin.

If you wanted to be honest, while you were listening to Joshua, you finally understood what Jeonghan had been talking about when he had said that the two weren’t a good match. It seemed that their taste in dates were pretty different while they also valued different things in life. But who were you to ruin the magic for him and point out how materialistic his girlfriend sounded based on his stories? Maybe, Soyeon just accepted what he gave her anyway. The two of you had never had a real conversation before, so you tried not to judge her too hard.

Nonetheless, you weren’t particularly fond of the conversation you had with Joshua, because it felt like such a waste of time. It killed the flow you had been going with while working on your protagonists’ journey towards the no man’s land. What a shame!

But it was Joshua and despite everything that had changed between the two of you since he had become your friend, your soft spot for him remained the same. Therefore, you paid close attention to him and nodded here and there to signal that you were listening. You even offered him a smile when he admitted that Soyeon wasn’t a big fan of rollercoasters and had said no to the haunted house even before she had agreed to visit the park and its resorts.

And the small albeit friendly smile was still on your face when said girl walked up to the two of you and Joshua pulled her closer for a chaste kiss on the top of her head. It was a lovely gesture, you had to admit this much. However, Soyeon clearly didn’t think that it was enough as she took her boyfriend’s cheeks into her hands and initiated a real one full of passion. At one point, you swore, you could see their tongues clashing, too, while she put all her heart into the kiss.

Since you didn’t wish to violate their privacy further, you turned to the coffee Joshua had bought for you and took a couple of sips from it, savouring its bitter taste with a pleased hum. You did it out of habit, as some sort of appreciation for the fine coffee beans they brewed at Coffee Carat but the moment you felt Soyeon’s piercing gaze on you, you knew that she misunderstood you. Whether on purpose or unintentionally, you were yet to find out.

‘Could you buy me the usual, babe? Seokmin is so intimidating, I would rather catch up with your friend,’ she asked Joshua with a sweet smile, alerting you to the unnecessary drama that always followed these kinds of claims in ya stories.

She turned towards you with her entire body like a predator.

‘It’s been a while since we talked, hasn’t it?’ She dedicated her next question to you almost in a challenge as though she wanted you to call her out on her bullshit.

But you didn’t. Not because you feared her or the consequences, but because a voice inside of your head told you this was exactly what she wanted. Girls like Soyeon, those who played the intimidating in front of their potential rivals instead of believing in their own worth, liked painting them the devil. You had read too many books and fanfictions, observed too many different kinds of people to walk into such an obvious trap.

‘I guess so,’ you answered curtly, pondering on what exactly “a while” meant and finding it interesting how such vague phrases could mean so many things depending on the person who used them.

‘Of course,’ Joshua gave in easily, shooting a smile in both of your directions before he left to stand in the line in front of Seokmin.

This time, you didn’t encourage anyone to make themselves comfortable by your table, but you didn’t necessarily have to. Soyeon sat down on the chair on your right so casually as if she owned the place.

‘Look!’ She started once she leaned forwards, resting her elbow on the wood and her chin on her palm. ‘I’m sure people from where you lived before are all lovey-dovey with each other, but I would appreciate it if you kept your distance from my boyfriend. I don’t need your dirty, countryside folk hands on him,’ she barked, surprising you with how authentic she sounded with her jealous bitch monologue. You had only ever encountered things like this in fictional settings as your love life had been pretty much nonexistent in high school and university. Weren’t you too old to find yourself in such a ridiculous situation?

‘That’s stereotyping. Also, Busan might not be Seoul, but it’s still a very big city. Actually, it’s the second most populated city in our country,’ you stated plainly, using the same strategy you always used when you didn’t wish to drag out a situation: you put your indifference on display.

‘Not my point,’ Soyeon remarked with a click of her tongue, clearly displeased with where this conversation was heading. You took another sip from your coffee. ‘I know you have feelings for him, so quit the innocent act! Or else, I’ll make sure they will all drop you.’

A part of you wanted to tell her that Joshua’s friends didn’t like her. It wanted to tell her that they only tolerated her because they genuinely cared for their friend. But that would have been petty and childish and you didn’t intend to entertain her.

You could see it on her face that she wasn’t satisfied with how calm you took her threat, but fortunately, before she could have broken the momentary silence or pushed you more, Joshua came back and the couple bid their goodbye, wishing you a wonderful day.

Staring at the door that closed shut behind their back, your mind wandered to those memories you had made with your new friends. You slowly dropped your chin atop of the back of your hand and wondered whether you would have missed them badly if you lost them from one day to another. The answer should have been yes and yet, you couldn’t pinpoint the damage their absence could have caused if any. Did you consider them close friends already? Or were you just pleased with the idea that you weren’t that alone anymore?

‘Aren’t you tired of this? Acting like you aren’t affected?’ A familiar voice called you out, dragging you out of your messy thoughts. You turned your head to the right and looked up at Jeonghan. ‘She was a fucking bitch to you.’

You offered him a shrug and leaned your back against the backrest of your chair while he pulled out the one across from you. The action welcomed you with familiarity. He always chose that chair over the ones on your sides when it was just the two of you.

‘I’m not acting. I don’t care about her threats,’ you said while you kept your eyes on him. Now that the previous conversations had already broken your flow, you didn’t mind having some company for a bit longer.

‘Why?’

‘I don’t think any of you like her enough to act based on her wishes. Expect for Joshua,’ you stated in a neutral tone, face devoid of decipherable emotions. You treated this knowledge as a fixed fact. You didn’t need him or any of them to correct you or add details to your claim in order to comfort you. You didn’t need reassurance about this to feel secure.

Yet, Jeonghan gave you some anyway.

‘Well, that’s one hundred percent true,’ he started before he mimicked your posture and made himself more comfortable. He even linked his arms in front of his chest and raised a brow to appear more… cocky? You weren’t sure whether this was what he was aiming for, but this was the effect his aura had on you nevertheless. ‘However, this doesn’t mean you should let people talk to you like you were a piece of street trash.’

You knew he was right. No one should have let others talk to them disrespectfully, including you. It was just…

‘Some people just aren’t worth the reaction they’re aiming for,’ you said without thinking too much into how your words might have sounded or what they could have implied.

Honestly, you didn’t realise that you came off a bit too strong until you saw Jeonghan’s smile fade and turn into an ugly frown. Then, you couldn’t shake off the thought that he might have been reminded of your very first encounter. Or was he thinking of how you acted around him in general? Did he think he still wasn’t worth it in your eyes, either?

Just in case your assumptions were right, you showed him a grateful smile. Not a big one, but the first one that you dedicated solely to him as a person, a friend, instead of someone who told you an unexpectedly funny joke.

He seemed content with your gesture.

Joshua and his girlfriend had broken up after being together for two months and twelve days which meant that Hoyeon had won their bet and earned the privilege to kick the guys out of their own apartment three times without any explanation. She had used her first time a week after the sad news and spent an entire day with her boyfriend, lazing around in nothing but an oversized tee and panties, living off on cheap take-out and the ice cream Jeonghan had stored in their freezer. At least, this had been what Jeonghan complained about when he had told you the details of your date with Joshua.

A date that he had arranged for you behind your back and one that you hadn’t really felt like going on until you had gotten to know that he had already paid for the dinner and that the place he had found for you was too fancy to give their customers refunds when they couldn’t show up.

While you were waiting for Joshua to show up - he had sent you a message that he would be a few minutes late because of bad traffic -, your thoughts constantly returned to the very same questions: Why would there have been restaurants where people could pay for their food in advance with only a slim chance for refund? And why would anyone have lived with this odd opportunity when it was extremely disadvantageous? Yoon Jeonghan made no sense, his life decisions made absolutely no sense to you.

But a part of you liked his unpredictability.

‘Hey! I’m so sorry. Gosh. I must look like a mess! I just, I couldn’t not try to get here at least a bit less later, so I just… well, started to run,’ Joshua explained under one breath, without the slightest care about the other guests near your table or the employees who couldn’t take their eyes off his indeed dishevelled figure. He looked like someone who had been chased by wild gooses or chewed and spat out by starving, stray dogs. Not that you cared. If anything, you appreciated his futile attempt at arriving on time.

‘It’s fine,’ you tried to reassure him with a small smile and a casual wave of your hand that he accepted with a curt nod right after he took a seat on the chair across from you. Obviously, it wasn’t the first time that someone sat in front of you (and you were aware that this was more like the norm instead of an exception when it came to two people at a diner or a restaurant), but you couldn’t not think of Jeonghan while you were watching his friend fixing his elegant dress shirt and hair.

You wondered whether he could finally enjoy a nice afternoon at their apartment on his own now that Joshua was with you and Seungcheol was at the coffee shop. He had complained so much lately about how he couldn’t walk around half-naked anymore in his own home and how their living room was always occupied when he wanted to watch his favourite dramas on a bigger screen than his laptop’s.

You shook your head before your thoughts could have strayed towards dangerous territories such as Yoon Jeonghan in sweatpants on their couch. You didn’t want to disrespect Joshua by thinking of his best friend during your date. It didn’t matter that you weren’t interested in him romantically anymore.

‘Have you ordered yet? Jeonghan said their chicken steak is one of a kind,’ Joshua asked, his gaze stuck on the closed menu card in front of you. You took it in your hands. ‘Hopefully, in a good way, though,’ he added with an amused chuckle, making you smile as well with the way his broad shoulders were shaking from his suppressed laugh.

‘I don’t know. I have no idea what’s our limit, so I didn’t want to choose anything until you arrive,’ you admitted honestly as you opened the velvet menu card and checked the items in the soup, pasta and nonalcoholic drink categories. The Creamy Garlic Seafood Pasta sounded delicious, but you didn’t feel like wasting money on ridiculously expensive white wine just to go with their written suggestions. Some sprite should have been just as fitting. Or not. You were by no means an expert.

‘Our what?’ Joshua asked, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion that made you wonder whether you weren’t supposed to know that it wasn’t him who paid for your dinner. Should you have pretended that you were clueless to save his ego? Nah. It was too late for that and you didn’t particularly like lying, anyway. He wasn’t less in your eyes just because Jeonghan might have had more money and could have afforded eating here more frequently than either of you.

‘It’s okay. Jeonghan has already told me about their super fancy concept of payment,’ you said with a nonchalant shrug, putting a bit more emphasis on how much you didn’t care about materialistic matters. You would have been perfectly fine with splitting your bill, too, if only that had been an option to begin with.

‘I’m not sure I’m following. Having the opportunity to pay by both cash and credit card isn’t that rare anymore. It’s more like a reasonable demand if you ask me,’ he said with a big grin before he turned back to his own menu card, humming quietly while jumping from one item to another in contemplation.

‘Oh! Yeah, I guess,’ you mumbled under your nose, bewildered due to the sudden realisation. So this wasn’t a restaurant where people could pay in advance for their food. Or if it had been, Jeonghan had never done so. Did a place like that even exist?

In the end, Joshua went for the chicken steak his friend had recommended to him with lemon coke (unlike you, he had come with his car) and you asked for the seafood pasta that had caught your eyes while you had been looking for something safe but new. Fortunately, neither of you felt disappointed once your dinner was served and you finally got to taste the first bite. The food was otherworldly.

Munching on your own choices, you tried to enjoy your date to the fullest even though it felt more like a date between friends than anything more. You talked about your day and how you were conflicted whether you should have adopted a kitten for real or waited and saw if it was only a temporary obsession you had obtained because of your best friend’s new cat, Cracker. Meanwhile, he told you about his job - you had no idea until this conversation, but he was a potter! - and the seasonal workshop he planned to start in early June. It was nice getting to know him better and sharing little nothings about yourself with him in a new environment, without the constant reminder that almost every employee at your favourite coffee shop slash usual meeting place was his friend.

Your assigned waiter walked up to your table with your desserts before you realised how much time had passed.

‘I assume, you haven’t told him yet, have you?’ He asked between two bites of strawberry cheesecake. You raised a brow in question, cutting a bigger piece off your slim slice of carrot cake with your fork. Joshua shot a knowing smile at you. ‘You don’t like me anymore.’

It wasn’t a question. On the contrary, he pronounced every syllable with such confidence as though he was talking about universal truths. You pulled the dessert off the fork with your teeth nonchalantly and nodded.

‘Yeah, I mean, not in a romantic way at least. But I still think that you’re an amazing person and I’m grateful that I got to know the real you. To even have you as a friend,’ you confessed, because he deserved the truth. You might have had a crush on him a month ago, a few months ago, but not anymore.

If you wanted to be honest, you weren’t exactly sure when your feelings had changed. But you had already planned to tell him about it once you left the restaurant. You didn’t intend to lead him on and bid your goodbye without coming clean. You simply respected him enough to save his face in public. You hoped he knew this.

Joshua’s piercing gaze set your body on fire and painted your cheeks a light shade of pink, but despite your slight discomfort, you didn’t ask him to stop staring at you. You kept eating like nothing had happened. Because nothing had happened, had it? During your whole date, there hadn’t been a single misleading word that had left your mouth. You hadn’t been flirting with him nor had you invaded his personal space with inappropriate touches. You had treated him like a friend and honestly, he had done the same.

‘He’s a catch. I don’t blame you,’ he broke the silence before it could have embraced the two of you even tighter, the smile in the corner of his mouth indicating that he truly meant it.

You acknowledged his words with a nod and didn’t add more to the topic. Mostly, because you preferred to keep your personal life private. Partly, because you believed that it was something you should have talked about with Jeonghan first.

You finished your dessert in the same, light atmosphere that had described the first half of your dinner and asked Joshua about the movie night that Seungcheol was in charge of next Saturday. You had already promised the eldest that you would bring some snacks, but now that you had the chance, you inquired about Joshua’s favourites and whether you should have bought something healthy as well like fruit chips and almonds.

Too invested in your conversation about your favourite genres and movies, once Joshua took care of the bill, you accepted his offer to give you a ride back to your home, then invited him over for a cup of coffee or tea of his choice.

Eyelids heavy and limbs embarrassingly slow, it was already past midnight when he left your place, thus when you got to take a quick shower and drift off to sleep. Yet, even if you could have turned back time, you wouldn’t have chosen your beauty sleep over your night with him. Because moments like these were rare and you could always drink your coffee with an extra shot of espresso in the morning.

The day after your date with Joshua, you woke up to dozens of unread messages from him, Hoyeon and Jeonghan. But while the former had sent you links to movie reviews and photos of Jeonghan visibly pouting on their couch with a croissant in his hands, the latter two wanted to know everything about your dinner.

You promised to tell them everything in person later. Then, you turned around and put your head down just to fall asleep before either of them could have nagged you because of those answers Joshua apparently refused to give them.

You were too exhausted and coffee deprived to deal with reality. (And with those friends you now considered close and real friends even if you weren’t as affectionate as Seungcheol, as caring as his girlfriend, as friendly as Joshua or as playful as Jeonghan. You expressed your love for them differently. You observed things and remembered.)

It was nearing closing time when Jeonghan stormed into the café, ordered a cup of coffee and two cupcakes, then took a seat across from you at your table. You didn’t budge. Instead, you kept working on the scene you had been writing since you had arrived, confident with where your story was going. It had been a while since the sentences flowed so naturally under your hands, so you didn’t wish to put an end to your process ahead of time.

And Jeonghan understood this. You didn’t know whether it was the shallow furrow between your brows or the determination in your eyes that gave you away, but he understood. Because for the first time since the two of you had met, he waited in silence until you were ready to hear him out.

You could see it from the corner of your eyes whenever you took a small sip from your coffee to organise your thoughts and rest your sore fingers that he was watching you, but he did it subtly while pretending to be busy on his phone. Knowing how he was, you wouldn’t have been surprised if he had actually answered a few emails while he was waiting. Or maybe not. He could have just as easily killed some time on his friend’s meme page.

It took you one and a half pages more to finish your current chapter and close the tab of your online document. When you did, you turned off your laptop, then looked up at Jeonghan and raised a brow in question, encouraging him to speak.

‘So…’ he started with a mischievous smile, adjusting his position so that he could lean a little closer to you over the table. ‘How was your date? Joshua looked pretty delighted when he got home which, now that I think about it, he did much later than I’d have thought.’

You stared at him blankly, wondering whether he didn’t realise what he was implying (he was too smart not to) or it was one of his desperate attempts at coaxing a reaction out of you. Did he want to know so badly whether you had had sex on your first date with his best friend? Tsk. What you would have given if only Joshua had come clean in the morning instead of teasing him with those endless possibilities that were most probably still poisoning the blonde man’s mind. A part of you were almost terrified - and a bit curious - to hear the conclusions he had come to during the day.

But your date had been a one time thing because of your feelings. Of course, it had to be you who explained the situation to Jeonghan. You couldn’t have expected Joshua to confess on your behalf. That would have been ridiculous and pretty much inconsiderate. Not to mention that you liked to be in charge of your own life decisions. So despite the inconvenience, you were actually grateful that he didn’t pry.

‘It was nice. He was late because he was at mine,’ you started with those facts that he had most likely already guessed. After all, Joshua wasn’t the type of person who went for another girl on the same night he had a date with someone.

‘Oh?’ Jeonghan’s eyes visibly widened at the confirmation, but he swallowed down his shock and shot a half-assed smile in your direction that you found almost endearing. It didn’t reach his eyes, but it meant that the possibility that your date had been successful bugged him. His reaction was the same that you would have written for a kind-hearted but jealous second male lead. Hiding your smile, you couldn’t wait for him to find out the role you assigned to him in your story. ‘Congratulations, I guess.’

You accepted his words with a curt nod while you reached for one of the cupcakes he had bought and took a small bite from the fruity dessert.

‘I told him I don’t like him anymore. At least, not more than a friend,’ you admitted between two bites, observing the changes in Jeonghan’s posture and entire body language. His nervous gulp could have meant that he was hopeful, but he could have been just as confused, thus you chose not to jump on quick conclusions. Even if you knew you would confess your feelings for him whether he liked you back or not. In love and war, there was no win without risk. ‘He actually knew it before I said it. Called me out on it,’ you added with a nostalgic smile, happy to realise that such tiny gestures didn’t surprise him anymore. You must have smiled more in his company these days for him to get so used to it. This thought made you warm and mushy inside.

‘You don’t?’ He asked, unsure. ‘Is there someone else or he’s just not as great as yo…’

‘He’s great,’ you cut him off before he could have said something he would have regretted. It wasn’t Joshua’s fault. It was simply wrong timing. If he had asked you out a month ago or you would have been willing enough to take the initiative before he had gotten together with Soyeon, things would have turned out differently. ‘But there’s someone else.’ Because then, you would have never spent so much time with Jeonghan and would have never opened up about your insecurities to him like how a part of you still waited for the time, people around you realised you weren’t interesting enough under the distant facade.

‘No way! Why didn’t you tell me? Who is it? Is it someone from the coffee shop? Of course, it is. Is it Seokmin? Just so you know, I won’t set you up with any of my friends ever again. If you want me to pick you a place as awesome as that restaurant, you should like me,’ he rambled, frowning as he distanced himself from you and leaned his back against the backrest of his chair. ‘Why don’t you just like me?’ He mumbled, the question too quiet for anyone to hear who wasn’t sitting by your table.

You took a sip from your cold coffee, then placed it back next to your laptop and linked your arms in front of your chest. Why not him? You had your answer for that.

‘You turn serious situations into games. You tend to act petty when things don’t go your way. You’re too proud to admit you can’t watch horror movies and invade my personal space when you get scared even though you know I hate how my hands get clammy when you hold them. You’re stubborn. You would rather overwork yourself than talk about your feelings. You’re nosy and…’

‘Okay, I get it. Jeez. It wasn’t a real question. Why are you like this?’ Jeonghan complained, his voice whiny. You didn’t have to look him in the eyes to know that your words made him upset, but honesty was an essential part of your personality, so you figured it was better if he knew what he would have to deal with in case he accepted your feelings.

‘But you’re also attentive and caring, always ready to comfort your loved ones. You don’t mind going out of your way to help your friends and put them first in every situation. You’re a good listener, Han, and because of your stubbornness, I gained numerous close friends in the past months. You’re funny and you make life more interesting. I’m not sure you realise, but you gave me enough inspiration lately to finish my book. Well, it’s not finished yet, but I’ve only three more chapters left,’ you admitted with your softest smile, a bit of bashfulness painting your cheeks rosy because of your heartfelt monologue. You hadn’t planned to sound so sappy while telling him the truth, but every word had come to you naturally and had fallen from your lips way too easily.

You tore your gaze from Jeonghan’s face and decided to put your laptop in your backpack to busy yourself with something. Hell. Were you embarrassed? No, not really. You just knew that you had managed to fill his ego more than you should have. And you weren’t quite ready for the consequences.

‘Oh? Do I hear more pros than cons on your list? Are you confessing your undying love for me?’ Jeonghan teased, his foot tapping yours under the table for good measure. You rolled your eyes.

‘It’s a confession, yeah, that I like you,’ you corrected him, because honestly, love was such a strong emotion and an absolute overstatement. You didn’t love him. However, you could see yourself doing so in the future if the two of you were as compatible as a couple as you were as friends.

Jeonghan’s eyes became three times as big as they initially had been when your plain answer wasn’t followed by another eye roll, but he concealed his surprise quickly with a smug grin that dressed your arms in goosebumps. Seeing him leaning close to you once again, over the table, you could feel it coming: his thoughts on your feelings. Shouldn’t his confidence have put you at ease instead of making you nervous?

‘You’re in luck, angel. I happen to like you, too,’ he said with a flirty wink, coaxing a sound akin to a scoff and an amused giggle out of you. He was impossible.

Some might have said that your confessions were a bit anticlimactic as they were devoid of passionate kisses and gestures people could read in fictional stories, but you preferred them this way: with you munching on your cupcake and Jeonghan gifting you with a smile before he turned towards Minghao to order a latte. In your interpretation, this was perfect, because it fitted your personality which meant he put your comfort first.

Thus, when the Chinese barista reminded his friend that he should have ordered at the counter since he had better things to do such as cleaning the tables, you offered a sip from your own coffee to the pouty Jeonghan. It didn’t matter that you never shared your food and drinks with anyone, because you wanted to put him first as well.

You knew he wasn’t a huge fan of your favourite order and that your black coffee was already cold, but seeing the happiness on his face because of your gesture, you concluded that it was worth it. Even when his content hums and his over exaggerated happy dance made you blush which only fueled his dramatics.

‘I’ll take you home. Will you ask me to stay over, too?’ He asked with the porcelain in front of his lips that couldn’t hide his excitement.

‘Joshua didn’t stay over,’ you reminded him with a groan, wondering whether it was you all along who hadn’t known what you had signed up for with a menace like Yoon Jeonghan. ‘But you can come up for a movie if you promise to not fall asleep on my couch. I won’t hesitate to kick you out,’ you stated with a blank face as you threw the last pieces of your cupcake in your mouth and reached for your bag.

Jeonghan did the same.

‘So cruel. I like it,’ he cooed and once you were both standing, checking your surroundings for forgotten items on your table, you noticed that his gaze stuck on your empty hand.

Therefore, you let him take it in his own despite your better judgement, almost regretting it immediately when you felt a thin layer of sweat forming on your palm against his. Gosh. It was so gross. But you figured, it was a little less gross with Jeonghan, so you rolled with it.

➼ next reason

#seventeen scenarios #jeonghan x reader #jeonghan x you #jeonghan #ssbyme #coffee shop au #seventeen series #humour

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all1e23 · 5 years ago

Text

Honey & Whiskey [Pt.1]

Pairings: Alpha!Billy Russo x Omega! Reader

Summary: Falling was sweeter than honey and warm as whiskey.

Warnings: None for this chapter. Typical A/B/O dynamics.

A/N: I know I am your dealer for soft Bucky but I’m trying out some new product. Soft Billy Russo. Just take a little taste. I promise It’s worth it. This is largely a self-indulgent fic and also for my beautiful beta @moonbeambucky. If you like it write me a book report, sing me a song or come scream at me.

***My fics are not to be saved or posted on any other sites without my written permission. Reblogs are my jam, though! Thanks!****

You heard his car in the driveway before you caught the sound of the front door. This probably wasn’t the way to handle something like this. Prominent families didn’t behave like this. They didn’t cause a scene, and they certainly didn’t question a match this good. It was hard enough to find an Alpha that came from a good family, but one who wasn’t a complete knothead and genuinely cared for you? That was next to impossible. You managed to find that one in a million, and here you were pulling a stunt like this.

When you were a little girl, you read stories about the princess finding her prince, being saved from the tower, and living happily ever after in a big castle. So, you waited for your very own to come. You waited and waited by your window, but your prince never showed. You stayed locked in your tower with no sign of a savior. As you became older, you realized you didn’t want to be rescued, taken from one dungeon, and moved to another. You could take care of yourself without an Alpha there to defend your heart and fight the evil queen on your behalf.

Turned out you could handle her on all on your own.

Then you met James one evening at a friend’s wedding. He was sweet. Dark hair, blue eyes, and a charming crooked smile. He offered to buy you a drink and didn’t flinch when you reciprocated with the second. It was easy with James right from the start, and your parents were thrilled. They were simply over the moon. He came from a long line of senators, and his family were members at the club where your father plays golf. Everything was perfect. It was all working out the way it was supposed to, and in one short week, you would be married and bonded to James.

In the two years you’ve spent together, James has done everything he could to make you happy, not once has he abused his authority over you or made you feel as if you were less than him as his Omega. James has never given you a reason to fear him. Everything on the surface was perfect, but if you looked close, the cracks were easy to spot. Your heart had never had cause to race when he was near, and you never did learn what it would feel like to go weak from his touch.

It was doubtful you would ever know what it would be like to tremble from the brush of your Alpha’s fingertips. The odds you would find that love in this lifetime were slim, but if you stayed where you were, there would be no chance.

“Uh, Y/n…’ James stopped in the doorway to your shared bedroom and looked fairly amused, albeit confused by your attire. “What’s going on? Isn’t this bad luck?”

You glanced down at your wedding dress and grimaced. It wasn’t that the dress wasn’t beautiful, it was. It wasn’t you, though. It was huge for starters. Your mother had insisted this was the one from the moment it graced your frame. The skirt was so large you weren’t sure you would make it into the limo Saturday morning, and the bodice and lace sleeves were covered in so many crystals it felt like you were carrying an extra thirty pounds of glitter. This wasn’t the dress you pictured when you spent your days playing princesses in your bedroom, and all of this felt wrong.

You looked back up at your fiance, who was by your side in an instant when he saw fresh tears falling down your cheeks. James quickly wiped them away with only his thumbs. No tender kisses brushed them away, his touch was gentle but not in a way that soothed the restlessness in your soul.

“Do you feel something seeing me in this? I mean, really feel something? Because I don’t feel anything when I put it on. I’ve been trying so hard to feel something, anything but... I don't."

James tossed his keys on the dresser and stuffed his hands in his pockets now that he realized what this was. It wasn’t a simple case of cold feet or some cute moment you were going to bring up at the rehearsal for a quick laugh during toasts. He didn’t look mad, he was disconcerted, and you couldn’t blame him for that.

You didn’t fully understand why yourself, so you couldn’t expect him to.

“Okay. What is this, baby? What’s going on?”

As good and kind as James was, it wasn’t there.

“I’m not in love, and I don’t think you are either.”

The confirmation you needed flashed in his eyes. He didn’t feel it either. You stepped forward and held your hands out for his. James placed his hands in your hands without any hesitation, his fingers tightened around yours the longer the silence stretched between you. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and when his eyes opened again, there was something different about them. They were filled with acceptance and a little bit of relief you knew he wouldn’t want you to see.

“I do love you, and I would take care of you,” James offered as if he was giving you one last opportunity to change your mind. One more chance to do the right thing.

You kissed his cheek and pulled your hand back from his hold, leaving the three-carat oval cut diamond resting in his palm. People lived that lie every day. Your parents, James’s parents, and you wouldn’t be surprised to find out it was the foundation on which most of the marriages you knew were born. Its prevalence among your social status was hefty and typical, but that wouldn’t be fair to either of you.

It wasn't a lie you could spend the rest of your life telling.

“I know, but I want more than that. I want to feel it.”

-----------

“Okay, May. I am out of here,” You chirped. It had been a long, exhausting day. You worked a double shift after one of the other waitresses, an Omega, called out claiming she was in heat, but this was her third heat in four months. It was entirely possible that she was being truthful and not using her designation to get extra days off so she could play house with that Beta she’s been dating since Halloween. Maybe she was a medical marvel, and her heats really did come three times as often as every other Omega on the planet.

All you knew for certain? Your bed was calling your name, and you could not wait to get out of this diner.

“The rush seems to have died down, and I am dead on my feet, so I’m leaving before we get the late dinner crowd, and you beg me to stay.”

“Yeah, yeah. Always complaining,” May teased with a grin and a motherly gleam in her eye. “Take your cut from the tips, and then I want you to eat and get some sleep. You can come in for the dinner shift tomorrow.”

“You gonna clear that with Roger?”

May rolled her eyes at the mention of your boss; Alpha and every bit the knothead prick.

“I’ll deal with him. Don’t you worry about it.”

"Hey, Y/n.” You glanced at Karen, who had a taunting smirk making her pale cheeks flush, she was pointing to the far back of the diner with her order pad, and she mocked with a teasing grin, “Look who it is! Your boy arrived just in time to see you off."

Your eyes followed her bright purple pen, and your knees went weak the moment you laid eyes on him. You didn’t know he was coming tonight. It’s been four days since you last saw his pretty face (not that you were counting or anything!), and you hadn’t realized how much you missed him until that moment. The handsome, dark-haired Alpha was sitting at one of your usual tables and looked uneasy, his leg was bouncing up and down at a vigorous pace, his dark blue hoodie pulled up over his head, and he was wringing his hands together as he scanned the small diner for you -- what you hoped was for you anyway.

"Don't get any ideas about that, Alpha." May Parker huffed.

The older Omega was a little cynical from the cards life had dealt her, and from the second you showed up looking for a job, she took it upon herself to look after you the way a mother would. It wasn't as if your mother had any interest in your life at the moment, not after you embarrassed her and left a black smear on your family’s name. A mark didn’t suffice for the choices you made. Your actions affected everyone in the family, bled onto the very fabric your ancestors stitched together, and made a tear that thread and needle could never mend. Apparently, you should have married even though you weren’t in love and simply found a way to fall in love with James after vows and rings were exchanged.

At least May understood your choice, and you couldn’t blame her for the fire in her eyes and the ice in her touch when it comes to Alphas; life had not been kind to her. Despite losing her true mate at a young age, only to end up with a sad stand-in for the man she lost. He abused his designation and using it to control her and her son. It took years to rid herself of him, but she built a nice life without him. She obtained assistance from an Omega Shelter, went through therapy to break their bond, and even bought a place of her own. Even after all the good that has come over the last seven years, the clouded memories have left her jaded and wary.

"You need to find someone that will take care of you, and he's not it. You stay away from Billy Russo, you hear me? He's not a good Alpha. I’ve known him longer than you have.”

That was true. You’ve only been in the city for eight months and working at Sunrise Diner for seven. Billy was a customer long before you came around, but according to Karen, he would pick up an order to go, barely spoke to anyone, and never tried to get a table. May didn’t know him any better than you did. It wasn’t as if they had some long-standing relationship or history. You were grateful for the advice, but you could make your own judgments.

You’ve let someone else be your eyes and voice for far too long, and you weren’t about to allow yourself to repeat past mistakes.

Billy finally found you standing behind the counter, and the second your eyes locked his own lit up, his legs settled, and the smile on his face just about knocked you over. Your smile widened as you stared at each other for what felt like ages.

"Y/n, are you listening to me?” May snapped her fingers in front of your face, forcing your eyes to focus on her. “He's trouble. Ex-marine with more issues than one person can handle."

You tossed your apron under the register in the black bin that held all the dirty smocks for the night. You glanced at your reflection in the silver napkin holder, resting in the order window and swore under your breath. Your hair’s frayed and sticking out every which way, and your lip gloss faded the first hour into your shift. It was too late to do anything about that now. Not with May watching your every move and Billy sitting so close, his eyes trained on you now that he found you.

Having Billy watch you fix your lipstick because he came in would be an embarrassment you wouldn’t survive.

"That's why he should have someone he can lean on. We are friends. I have a feeling he needs someone that won’t judge him for a past he can’t change.”

"Trouble,” May huffed. “You're asking for trouble."

You practically skipped over to the table Billy sat at. Same one as always. The booth at the far back of the bright restaurant where he had a view of the bathrooms and the front door. He always sat with his back against the wall, and every few minutes, his eyes wandered over to the exit door on his right. You didn’t know what happened, but you knew it was enough to keep him on edge at all times.

"Hey, Stranger."

Billy's near-black eyes looked brighter now that you’re near, and he gave you that toothy grin that made your stomach flip.

"Hey, sunshine.”

Sunshine.

Billy has called you that from the moment you met, you weren’t sure why, but it made your heart race every time it rolled off his tongue. You have to admit you didn’t hate the feeling.

"You haven't been in for a few days. I was starting to think the mac and cheese scared you off."

That wasn’t really true. Though, you did question the state of the mac and cheese on a regular basis. The way the noodles all stuck together in that round ball wasn’t natural. This was more about you than sticky elbow pasta goop. You were slightly worried that he may have started seeing an Omega and would no longer be coming by for these late-night visits. Not that it was any of your business. It’s not as if you’re bonded or even potential mates. You haven’t spent a moment with Billy outside this diner. You had not an ounce of claim on him, and you certainly didn’t have a say in who he spent his days with -- or his nights.

Billy let his hood fall back, and he ran a hand over his buzzed hair. His scars were no longer as angry and red as they were when he first came in on that rainy Tuesday afternoon seven months ago. You can still recite every word he said to you that day like some silly school girl daydreaming about the cute boy in study hall. Some nights you did just that, on evenings when he didn’t come by or stayed far too late and left your heart aching for another ten minutes.

Scars or no, he was still the most handsome Alpha you had ever seen.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I, uh, it's been a tough few days is all, and I haven't had a second to come in."

You eyed him for a long minute, and you realized what he meant by a tough few days. More like it smacked you right in the face -- rut.

Did he share his rut with someone?

No. No, probably not.

Billy didn’t seem to give his trust freely, so you doubted he called a Service Center to help him through his rut. That didn't mean he didn't have an Omega in his life, one he trusted enough to share it with. It shouldn’t matter if he did, so why did you want to know so badly? It would be easier if you could simply scent him to find out. That’s what you wanted to do. You were aching to scent him right there in the middle of the damn diner in front of Karen, May, and anyone else that wanted to stare. You wanted to be sure there wasn’t a hint of another Omega anywhere near him, maybe leave a little bit of you on him.

What the hell was wrong with you?

You’ve never been this possessive before. Even with James, you never cared if he came home smelling like another Omega. Hell, you never gave it a thought. Billy wasn’t yours, and you needed to remember that.

"I’m glad you’re back. I missed you."

Billy tried to fight off his grin. He tried hard, but it still showed up brightly enough to make you simper. He must have liked that because his scent sweetened, and it was so thick it had your knees shaking. You stood up as straight as you could and locked your knees. Letting your legs give out over some handsome Alpha like a stereotypical Omega would be a shame you could never come back from.

"Is that right?" Billy drawled, smirking as he took in the tremble in your knees and the honey sugaring your scent.

"Yeah, you're my favorite customer,” you answered with a slight shrug. Billy chuckled and ducked his head to hide the pink spreading from his cheeks down his neck, but you caught the rosy hue regardless.

"Favorite." He recited the word as if he didn't like the way it tasted on his tongue like he was confused as to why you would use that word in association with him.

"Without question,” you assured him.

The hesitation in his eyes and confusion had your heart breaking. Someone along the way, recently or long ago, made him feel as though he wasn’t worthy of being someone’s favorite, of being that important to someone. The thought made your gut clench in the worst way. Billy was more than deserving of that title.

"So, I'm about to get off. My shift actually ended about ten minutes ago. Well, technically, my shift ended at two, not eight, but one of the girls is out making medical history, so here I am."

"Oh,” Billy murmured. He was disappointed, that was plain to see. The light in Billy’s eyes instantly faded, and he began to slide out of the booth. You had a feeling if he left now, he would end up picking tacos off the dollar menu at some fast-food chain, eating all alone back at his place. You couldn’t have that now, could you? Besides, friends have dinner together all the time. Isn’t that what Karen told you every time she had dinner with Frank?

Yes, friends could have dinner together, and it didn’t have to mean more than noodles and cheese.

”I can- I'll go eat somewhere else. I don’t want to keep you if you’re going home.”

You rested your hand on his shoulder to keep him from sliding out past you and shook your head, still smiling down at him. "Oh, no, you don’t. Unless you want to leave, of course. Food here isn't great."

Billy looked up at you, and his eyes have gone dark again, but it wasn’t in the way you liked. He was struggling to figure out what he wanted to say. You could see the moment Billy gave in to whatever it was, he was wrestling with and confessed, “I don't come here for the food.”

Your heart was pounding so hard you swore you could hear it in your ears. No doubt, Billy could pick it up in your scent. You never considered buying suppressants until you met Billy Russo. Then again, there were a lot of things you never considered until you met him. You blew out a shaky breath, and your words came out in as a stuttering mess, "Then… w-why do you come h-here?"

Billy held your gaze but didn’t elaborate further. It was probably for the best. If he had said what you thought could be the reason you might have melted right there at his feet and would have been forced to quit your job citing irremediable humiliation.

"Okay, um, well, I maybe thought I could eat with you? I haven't eaten since this morning, and I've been working all day, so I’m starving."

Billy frowned at that, and he quickly pressed for more, "You haven't eaten all day? So, that means you worked all day without taking a break?”

"Yeah, it happens. Some days it's really busy, and I don't get a second. Roger, our boss, he’s not great at following labor laws. If things get busy like they were today, there is no way he’s letting me take a break.”

If it was possible, Billy’s eyes blackened, and his normal candied scent turned sour. It was a subtle change to the whiskey and brown sugar scent you’ve come to know. He wasn’t on blockers, nor were you, it made his feelings easy to read. You weren’t sure he liked that fact at the moment. The scrunch of his nose and the wrinkle in his brow said he was trying to control his feelings to keep them hidden from you, or maybe he was attempting to understand whatever feeling was jumbled in his head.

“I don’t-- I don’t like that. You should be getting breaks so you can eat. You have to eat.”

You didn’t like it either, but there was little you could do. You had no way to prove that Roger refused to let you take breaks, and it wasn’t like he said he would fire you if you went on break. It only was heavily implied, and he knew when to use an Alpha command, with the tiniest drop in his voice, he had Omegas scampering to do as he wished. Thankfully, you have yet to be on the receiving end, and you had no intention of experiencing it. You needed this job whether or not Billy approved of your break schedule. You couldn’t do anything about Roger or your schedule, but you might be able to fix Billy’s spoiled mood and catch another glimpse of his pretty smile.

"How about you feed me then?" You suggested with a grin.

Billy’s frown quickly faded into a crooked smirk, a gentle chuckle followed, and everything turned sweeter. Whenever Billy was smiling, there was a little more sugar and a little less whiskey floating nearby, and it often left your head spinning for days after. You’ve never been one to fall for a sugar rush over a whiskey high -- until now.

"Okay, Sunshine. I can do that. Do you want to eat here or somewhere else?"

"Where are you most comfortable?"

"Where am I most comfortable…” Billy repeated the question, brows furrowed in thought, and he responded without thinking, “I’m most comfortable when I’m with you."

Billy quickly realized that was not what you meant when he looked up to see your eyes widen. He cleared his throat and sat up straighter as he tacked on an addendum, hoping you would ignore his first admission. "Nowhere that’s loud. Or, um, crowded. I’m not great in large rowdy groups. I need a place I can sit like this. My back against the wall and know my exits."

You knew that already and now you were mad at yourself for making him admit it out loud, but you had to confess not all of his revelation sounded so bad.

"I'll tell you what I live right around the corner. How about you come over, and I'll make you dinner?"

Inviting an Alpha you barely knew back to your place wasn’t the smartest thing you’ve done. Everyone knows, Omegas at least, you never tell an Alpha your address until you’re courting, and you know what kind you’re dealing with. You couldn’t explain why but your heart and your head were telling you to trust him and when they agree on something you listen.

“You want me to come back to your apartment?”

Billy seemed to be questioning your judgment, but nothing felt wrong about having Billy in your home.

“Only if it will make you feel more comfortable. If not, I know a pizza place a few blocks away, but we will have to catch a cab.”

You truly didn’t mind either way as long as Billy was comfortable. He took a few thoughtful seconds before he nodded. “Your place is okay. If you’re sure, you want me to know where you live.”

You grinned and stepped back so he could stand. “Let me grab my purse, and I’ll meet you by the door, okay?”

Billy didn’t have a chance to answer because you were bounding off towards the counter and the group of nosy Omegas watching you both with interest. Billy stuffed his hands in the pockets of his hoodie, watching you share a few hushed whispers with the older woman behind the register.

“You’re leaving together? Y/n, this is not a good idea. Why can’t you stay here together where we keep an eye on you? It would be safer that way.”

“I said I’m fine. I don’t need you to look after me just because I’m an Omega. I can handle myself, and I can handle Billy.”

“He’s not what you think. I only want you to be careful.”

You jerked your jacket out from under the counter and slipped your arms into the black puffy arms. You were already done with this. She didn’t know Billy any better than you did. Maybe she saw some things, or he came off like a typical asshole Alpha once when they first met, but the only conversation they have had revolved around grilled cheese sandwiches and you. You stopped in front of May, and you couldn’t keep the ice out of your voice even if you had wanted to. “Did you ever stop to think that maybe he’s not what you think? I’ll see you tomorrow. Have a good night, May.”

Billy glanced over your shoulder and back at you as you approached. “Everything alright over there?”

“Oh, you know.” You shrugged as you stepped out the door Billy was holding open for you. “Co-worker drama.”

There were tiny bits of moonlight shining down on the sidewalk next to you. It was awkward at first. This wasn’t your normal dynamic. Billy came in and ordered the same grilled cheese and fries every night; not that you could blame him for that, it was probably the only edible thing on the menu. You would make some cute comment about melted cheese and Billy would give you that smile that set skin on fire, he left a tip that was always triple the cost of the tiny sandwich and promised to see you real soon. You knew the risks that came with what you were doing. You are breaking the first rule they teach you in Orientation class, but you didn’t care, and it didn’t scare you.

Billy didn’t scare you.

“You know you really shouldn’t invite Alphas you don’t know back to your apartment. It’s not safe. I could be anyone. I could be some asshole Alpha using that sweetness in your heart to take advantage of you.”

Maybe that was the thing that should scare you -- your blind trust for an Alpha you barely knew.

“No, you’re not, Billy.”

“Yeah? How do you know that, Sunshine?”

Billy was teasing you, the mile-wide grin on his face told you so. You shook your head and matched his smile. The answer was pretty simple, really. It was the one thing missing with James. You felt the tension in your shoulders lift, and you told him the only thing about tonight that mattered.

“I can feel it.”

Masterlist // Part 2

#Alpha!Billy Russo x Omega! Reader #Billy Russo x reader #Billy Russo x you #Billy Russo x yn #Billy Russo #A/B/O au #a/b/o #a/b/o dynamics #alpha!billy #alternate universe

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