#Chapter Twenty-Two: Drag Me to Hell

[punkshort]

i'll be home for christmas | part two

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: Having just caught your fiancé cheating on you, you decide to come back home from the big city to Austin for the month of December to try to figure out your next step. You had no idea you would be getting more than you bargained for with the handsome single dad who built your parents' house.

Chapter Warnings: no outbreak, modern day but Joel is 40, language, fluff, very soft!joel, flirting, kissing, hallmark movie tropes up the wazoo, mentions of infidelity, mentions of divorce, reader's sister is pregnant, hurt/comfort, explicit smut (18+MDNI), (somewhat) unproteced piv sex, angst (but you know there will be a happy ending, this is Hallmark, after all)

WC: 12K

A/N: I am so overwhelmed at the response I received for part one. No contest, it's my most successful story to date, and I can't thank you all enough ❤️ I really hope you enjoy this part just as much. Please read the warnings, this has some (very sweet and soft) smut at the end, so if it isn't your thing, feel free to skip it.

Series Masterlist

Joel sat in his truck, the engine long cooled down by now, as he stared blankly at his garage door, waiting for the stupid grin to leave his face before he went inside to face his brother. But he had been sitting there for almost twenty minutes, and he was still smiling behind the back of his hand.

That date with you was perfect. Well, he could have done without getting knocked on his ass by some kid, but it worked out for him in the end, so he didn't mind.

Goddamn, did you make him feel good. There was no way he would be able to sleep that night, he was sure of it. Not after the way you looked at him, touched him, kissed him. A big part of him wondered for a long time if he would spend the rest of his life alone, believing that lightning doesn't strike twice, that he would never find anyone who would look at him and want him the way you did.

He ignored the nagging voice in the back of his head that reminded him you didn't live there, that you would be going back to New York in a couple short weeks. He couldn't let that bring him down just yet, that was a problem for another day. Right now, his only problem was resisting the urge to drive back to your house and scoop you up in his arms so he could make you feel as good as he felt.

It was close to midnight, so he caved and went inside, hoping his brother would be too groggy to interrogate him. When he walked in and saw Tommy and Sarah lounging on the couch, wide awake and watching some action flick, his face fell.

"Hey, it is way past your bedtime, the hell are you doin'?" Joel scolded, sliding off his boots.

"Dad, c'mon, it's the weekend," Sarah whined.

"Don't care, you know the rules," he told her, trying to sound firm, but he had such a soft spot for her that he never succeeded in sounding threatening.

"But it's a special occasion, I wanted to hear how your date went," she grinned, sitting up and wiggling her eyebrows. Joel's jaw dropped and shot a glare at his brother while stretching his arms out at his side in disbelief.

"Oh, come on, she practically dragged it outta me," Tommy smirked.

"Unbelievable," Joel muttered, collapsing on the end of the couch and rubbing his eyes.

"So?" Sarah pushed, tucking her legs underneath her excitedly.

"I ain't talkin' about this with you," he said, biting his cheek as he stared at the TV.

"Why not?" she pouted, but Joel just shook his head.

"Go brush your teeth," he said.

"Fine," she replied, rolling her eyes as she made her way to the stairs. "But I'll get it out of you one day."

She stomped upstairs and it wasn't until Joel heard the water running that he turned to his brother.

"What the hell, Tommy? You know I didn't want her knowin' about that," he said, exasperated.

"Oh, relax," Tommy said, stretching his arms above his head. "She's sixteen, Joel. She's smart. She figured it out herself, I just confirmed it after gettin' the third degree."

Joel sighed and tipped his head back onto the sofa, closing his eyes.

"Christ," he muttered.

"What's the big deal?"

Joel sat up and opened his eyes.

"Big deal is, she lives in New York. There's no future there, we were just hangin' out, and I don't need Sarah gettin' her hopes up," Joel explained, trying to downplay his feelings, but his chest squeezed at the thought of you leaving one day.

"Ever hear of long distance?" Tommy asked, raising an eyebrow.

"That never works," Joel replied, shaking his head.

"Well, maybe you should make it work," he said, sitting up and muting the TV. "You know, Sarah just wants you to be happy, Joel. We both do," Tommy said somberly. "Told me tonight she's worried about you bein' all alone when she goes off to college."

"I'll be alright," he said gruffly, although the same thought was plaguing his mind recently, as well.

Tommy stared at his brother a moment as Joel watched the TV, pretending to follow the story even though there was no audio. He decided to drop it for now and changed the subject.

"So, you gonna tell me how it went or what?"

Joel bit his lower lip, trying to keep himself from smiling, but he failed. Tommy noticed right away and grinned, leaning forward to tap his knee.

"I know that look," he said, still grinning.

"Yeah, alright," Joel finally said with a smile. "It was great. Really fuckin' great."

"Hell yeah!" Tommy yelled, and Joel immediately shushed him, pointing upstairs.

"She's funny and she's sweet, we had a real nice time," Joel said, his grin permanently etched on his face now.

"I figured it went well since you got home so late," Tommy replied with a wink.

"I ain't gonna sleep with her on the first date," he whispered, just in case Sarah was listening. He settled back into the couch as Tommy turned the TV volume back on, letting the movie play for a minute before adding, "She's a good kisser, though."

"Oh, I can't wait to meet this girl," Tommy chuckled with a shake of his head. "Haven't seen you smile this much in years."

"Yeah, well," Joel replied noncommittally, still smiling like an idiot and staring at the TV. He decided to stay downstairs that night, finishing the movie and then starting another one on the couch long after Tommy left, unable to quiet down his mind long enough to fall asleep until nearly three in the morning.

You woke up the next day, stretching your arms above your head with a big yawn, not ready to get out of bed yet but the voices downstairs told you it must have been late. With a groan, you reached over and snatched your phone off the charger. When you saw you had a text waiting for you, your heart skipped a beat until you read Sydney's name and not Joel's. Your eyes flicked to the top of the screen, noting it was close to ten in the morning, before sliding open the text.

Sydney: sorry forgot to reply yesterday. I saw will at black & blue, he was hammered and falling all over the place

You scowled, not interested in whatever your ex was up to, so you replied with just the thumbs up emoji and set your phone back down.

Staring at the ceiling, you dreamily thought about your date with Joel. God, he really took you by surprise. You were proud of yourself for taking that first big step forward and putting yourself out there again, but you had no idea it would feel like this. You weren't even sure you ever felt like this with Will. Even when things were good, Will never treated you the way Joel did last night. He was so earnest and respectful, opening doors for you and actually listening to you talk about work. And he didn't even try to feel you up, either, although you probably wouldn't have minded. Maybe it was those Southern manners you were missing this whole time.

With a groan, you dropped your phone back on the nightstand and swung your legs over the edge of your bed, wrapping yourself in your robe, still not expecting it to be so cold in Texas. Even though it was December, it was unusual.

You made your way into the kitchen and made a beeline for the coffee, tossing a wave in the direction of your parents sitting with your sister and brother in law in the living room.

"She lives!" Cassie exclaimed with a smug look on her face. You held your mug up to your lips and blew on the liquid, frowning when the whole family was looking at you with matching, goofy smirks.

"Why are you all looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" your mom asked innocently. You squinted at her as you sat down, not buying it.

"How was your date?" your sister asked. You took a sip of coffee before replying.

"Good," you said simply, nodding your head. Your mom and dad exchanged a look and you frowned again, getting annoyed.

"What?" you asked loudly.

"Nothing!" your dad said, looking back down at his newspaper. Who even still gets the newspaper delivered anymore, anyway?

"Josh, what's going on?" you asked your sister's husband, knowing he was the weakest link. He glanced nervously between you and Cassie.

"They saw you and Joel on the Ring camera," he blurted out, and your family all groaned in unison. Your face flushed beet red, gawking at them all in disbelief.

"Are you kidding me?" you screeched.

"We didn't mean to, Bucky. Dad was reviewing the footage because he couldn't find the newspaper this morning and, well..." your mom trailed off, trying to hide her smile.

"Oh my god," you whined, tucking your legs to your chest and hiding your face.

"Looked like the date was a little more than good," Cassie teased, and you smacked her on the leg.

"I can't believe this," you mumbled to yourself, hiding your face behind your coffee mug and praying someone would change the subject. "How much did you see?"

"Just from when he pulled in the driveway til when you went inside," your mom said with a shrug.

"That's, like, everything, Mom! Oh my god!" Your face was hot with embarrassment now.

"He looks like a good kisser, is he a good kisser?" Cassie asked.

"Shut up!" you whined, covering your face with your free hand.

"There's nothin' to be embarrassed about, he was a gentleman. Held the door open for you and everythin'," your dad murmured, and you groaned.

"Can we talk about literally anything else, please?" you begged.

"Of course!" your mom said, her eyes flicking around the room, waiting for someone to say something, but nobody spoke.

"I'm sorry, Buck, but you gotta see the the smile on his face after you went inside, it was so cute," Cassie said, pulling out her phone.

"I'm going upstairs!" you announced, jumping up from the couch.

"Wait! Are you still coming by later to help paint the nursery?"

"I don't know, are there any cameras there?" you shouted over your shoulder as your climbed the stairs with your coffee to hide in the sanctity of the guest bedroom.

"Well, no. Only because I haven't set the baby monitor up yet," Cassie called back and giggled when she heard you slam your door.

Grumbling to yourself, you flopped back into bed and picked up your phone, looking for a distraction from your embarrassment. You quickly found one when you saw you had a missed text from Joel.

Joel Miller: Question for you - when is the earliest you should text someone without looking too pathetic after you've had the best date of your life?

You grinned as you typed out a response.

You: answer - whatever time you sent this text :)

Joel Miller: Oh, good. Thought I scared you off, sent that about ten minutes ago.

You: sorry, I was downstairs talking to my family, forgot to bring my phone. And I don't think you could ever scare me off

You almost told him about the doorbell camera fiasco, but decided against it. Picking up your mug, you tried not to stare too hard at your phone as you waited for a reply.

Joel Miller: What are you doing later?

Your heart skipped a beat at the thought of seeing him again so soon, then quickly stopped yourself, remembering your promise to your sister.

You: I told my sister I would help paint the nursery...

Joel Miller: That's a shame. I was hoping you could teach me something again.

You: oh? lol

Joel Miller: I just realized how that sounded - I meant wrapping Christmas presents for Sarah. I'm awful at it and I have another hunch gift wrapping is a secret talent of yours.

You giggled and rolled over in bed, your embarrassment long forgotten now.

You: you might be right... how about tomorrow?

Joel took the porch steps two at a time, eager to see you again and it hadn't even been a full two days. His finger barely pressed the doorbell when he heard your voice call out I got it! and the door swung open. You smiled up at him, your eyes lighting up before dropping your gaze to his mouth.

"Hi," you said breathlessly.

"Hey," he replied, swallowing roughly.

"Have a nice time, Bucky!" your mom's voice rang out somewhere behind you as you shut the door quickly. Joel grinned, his gaze drifting from your eyes to your mouth before leaning in. You put your hand on his chest and tilted your head back before grabbing his hand and leading him to his truck. Confused, he followed behind and tried not to stare too long at the way your jeans perfectly hugged your ass.

You led him to the passenger side of the truck, but when he reached out to open the door, you snaked your hand up to wrap around the back of his neck, pulling his face down for a searing kiss only when you were sure you were hidden from view.

"Would I sound crazy if I said I missed you?" you whispered.

"No," Joel replied, shaking his head and trying to calm his pounding heart. "Couldn't stop thinkin' 'bout you."

"Me, too," you admitted softly, gazing up at him with your beautiful eyes all wide and burning with desire.

He cradled your face in his calloused hand, the other flattened firmly against the truck door behind you as he stared into your eyes, fighting the urge to pick you up and wrap your legs around his waist so he could pin you against his truck and let you feel just how badly he missed you.

Then, you heard your dad's SUV unlock and your eyes widened in panic.

"Shit," you muttered. "We should go. I think they're heading out."

"Alright, maybe I should say 'hi' real quick," he said, pushing himself off the truck and letting his hand drop from your face.

"No! That's okay, we'll be stuck here forever if you do," you said hurriedly. He gave you a curious smile but agreed before opening the door for you and hopping into the driver's seat.

He waited until he backed out of the driveway and was heading down your street before shooting you a sideways glance.

"Everythin' okay?"

You sighed and rubbed your palms over your face before clearing your throat.

"So, remember the other night on the porch, after you dropped me off?"

He smirked and nodded.

"Yeah, I think I remember," he teased.

"Well," you began. "My family saw us on the doorbell camera the next morning," you cringed.

He laughed, throwing his head back just a bit so he could still keep an eye on the road, and shook his head.

"Oh, I hate those fuckin' things," he said, but he was still laughing.

You grinned, your nerves and unease dissipating quickly.

"You're not embarrassed?"

"Nah," he said with a shrug, then turned his head briefly to look at you. "I'm sure we put on a good show."

You giggled, your cheeks tinting pink, and turned your head to look out the window.

"Alright," he said after a minute. "I've waited long enough and I gotta ask."

You swiveled back towards him, waiting for him to continue.

"What's the story with the nickname?"

You groaned and squeezed your eyes shut.

"It's so unbelievably stupid," you said, but he shook his head.

"Well, now you gotta tell me."

"Fine," you said, rolling your eyes, but your playful smile gave you away.

"It's Buck, or Bucky. Short for Bucket," you began.

"Bucket?" he repeated, bewildered.

"I warned you it was stupid!" you protested, and he chuckled. "Anyway, when I was little, my sister and her friends had a sleepover one time, and I overheard them swearing."

"Okay," Joel said slowly, nodding along while he kept his eyes pinned to the road.

"I always looked up to my sister, I was like her shadow when I was younger. So, when I heard them swearing, I wanted to be like them, too, you know?"

"Yeah, I follow," he replied, still not sure how the story related to your nickname.

"Well, thing is, I misheard them. They were saying 'fuck it', but I heard 'bucket'," you explained. "So I went to school and, thinking I sounded cool, I would say 'bucket' to all my friends. We were little, they had no idea what I was talking about, so I explained to them it's a swear word. Before I knew it, I had the whole class saying 'bucket' any time someone dropped something, or got a bad grade on a test, or whatever."

Joel howled with laughter, gripping the steering wheel for dear life as he tried to make it safely into his driveway.

"The principal called my parents and told them what was happening," you continued, joining in and giggling. "They got me home, and-" you doubled over, clutching your stomach as Joel put the truck in park and slumped over the steering wheel, his body shaking as he laughed.

"And I had to tell them the whole story, about why I kept saying it and-" you wiped the tears from your eyes as you took a deep breath. "And - oh my god - my sister got grounded for two weeks-" Another fit of laughter washed over Joel, tears streaming down his face.

"Wait, wait," he gasped, unbuckling his seatbelt so he could turn to face you. "You got in trouble in school, and your sister ended up gettin' punished?"

"Yes!" you squeaked, still giggling.

"Oh, shit," he breathed, panting as he leaned the back of his head against the seat rest. "Can't believe you thought that was stupid. That's gotta be the funniest thing I heard in a long while."

"Well, I'm glad I could brighten your day," you said, still grinning.

He rolled his head back towards you, his soft gaze drifting up and down your frame quickly before stopping on your eyes.

"You really do, y'know," he said quietly, and you furrowed your brow, tilting your head in confusion.

"Brighten my day," he clarified.

You bit your lower lip and smiled, looking away as the flush began to return to your cheeks.

"Come on, charmer. Why don't we go teach you how to wrap presents?"

You never really gave much thought as to what Joel's house would look like, but once you saw it, it immediately felt like him. It was a smaller, two bedroom house. When you first walked in, you entered a living room with a leather couch and an oversized recliner. A big screen TV was front and center across from the couch, with a few framed pictures of Joel and Sarah mounted on the wall next to it.

"You want somethin' to drink?" Joel asked, making sure to slide the coat from your shoulders before shrugging off his own.

"Maybe just water," you said, following him into the kitchen. You gasped when you saw his cupboards and immediately rushed over to them while he pulled two bottles of water from the stainless steel fridge.

"Oh my god, Joel," you whispered, running your fingers gently over the designs. Each one looked different but somehow they all were cohesive. Some had small flowers or butterflies carved into the corners, while others had simple, yet intricate designs grooved into the wood.

"Had to practice somehow," he said, feeling his cheeks flush as he walked over to hand you your water.

"God, it's so beautiful," you said breathlessly, unable to look away from the dark, stained wood. Your fingers danced over some stars etched into one of doors, your eyes wide with awe, but he was focused entirely on you. He couldn't get enough of watching the delicate features on your face light up whenever you found something new that pleased you.

"How long does this take for you to do?" you asked, finally dragging your eyes away to look up at him. Your throat tightened when you noticed the heat behind his stare, your pulse fluttering in your neck.

"Depends," he murmured. "Some are faster than others, but I prefer to go slow and take my time. Anythin' worthwhile takes time. Gotta show it respect, gotta care for it."

His low and sultry tone made your face flush, forgetting for a moment you were talking about woodworking.

"Y-yeah," you stammered, clearing your throat. Suddenly, you were feeling short of breath. "That makes sense."

He gazed down at you for another moment, his eyes slowly raking over your face as if committing it to memory before speaking again. Your entire body felt hot, and you cursed yourself for wearing such a thick sweater.

"Ready to go upstairs?" he murmured, still staring at you in a way that made your spine tingle.

"Huh?" you whispered, completely entranced by his deep, brown eyes.

"The presents?" he reminded you with a small smirk.

"Oh, right," you said, finally blinking and looking away. You shakily opened your water bottle after he turned around to lead you to the stairs, your mouth suddenly extremely dry.

As you walked up the steps, you tried to get a look at the pictures that lined the wall, but it was difficult to do without tripping. You thought you had finally gotten your head on straight after that moment in the kitchen, but when you realized he was leading you to his bedroom, you felt the tremble return to your hands.

"Sorry, had to hide everythin' in my closet, she's too nosy," he said over his shoulder.

"No problem," you squeaked, trying not to stare at his neatly made bed. Your eyes briefly drifted over the end tables filled with personal effects. You thought you saw a chapstick, a cord for a phone charger, and a worn paperback book, but you didn't want him to catch you, so you looked away quickly.

He opened his closet and you were surprised to find his clothes packed away so neatly. For a bachelor, he kept a really clean house. He pulled out the bags of gifts from the shelf above his clothes, then the wrapping paper, which was leaning against the corner.

"D'you think we got enough room?" he asked, glancing around at the floor.

"Yeah, of course," you said, sitting down crossed legged on the carpet. You reached out for the wrapping paper and rolled it out in front of you as he sat down at your side, taking out her gifts one by one. You felt yourself involuntarily clench as you watched his large hands deftly lay out each item on the floor, his muscles twitching slightly under the tanned skin of his exposed forearms.

"I know what you're thinkin'," he said, and your eyes widened in surprise. "I spoil her, I know, but she's such a good kid, I can't help myself."

That was definitely not what you were thinking, but you chose to keep that to yourself.

"I think it's sweet," you told him. "You seem like a really good dad."

Now it was his turn to blush. He tried to turn his head away so you wouldn't see, murmuring his thanks as you each picked an item to start. After a quick tutorial, which included way too much tape and ripped paper, Joel finally seemed to get the technique down. It only took until about halfway through the pile for you to muster up the courage to bring up a topic you couldn't help but be curious about.

"So," you began, hoping you came off nonchalant. "Is Sarah with her mom this Christmas, or..."

Joel's fingers fumbled for a moment with the wrapping paper, but he quickly recovered.

"Uh, no," he replied, keeping his eyes cast down on the shoe box in front of him. "She's not in Sarah's life anymore."

"Oh," you said, unable to keep the surprise from your voice, but you didn't push him any further. Your mind was scrambling, trying to think of something else to talk about, when he sighed and leaned back, abandoning the gift.

"I'm sorry, this is all so new to me, I probably should've told you about her sooner," he said, feeling guilty, but you quickly shook your head.

"No, you don't have to-"

"I want to," he said, cutting you off. You clamped your mouth shut and turned your body so you could give him your full attention, leaving the hair dryer you were wrapping on the floor next to you.

He drew a shaky breath in and looked up at the ceiling before speaking.

"There's not much to say, really. I'm still not always sure what happened," he began. You nodded, staying quiet and letting him take his time. "We were together since high school, ended up stayin' together after graduation. Sarah was a surprise, we were both still so young but we made it work. It was hard, but once me and Tommy got the business goin', it made things a bit easier."

Your fingers tangled together in your lap as you listened, refusing to say anything until he was done. His gaze drifted towards a fixed point on the wall as he continued.

"From what I gathered, she felt like havin' Sarah so young robbed her from doin' certain things in life," he said heavily. "Said she couldn't do it anymore. Didn't want her life to pass her by and be full of regret."

You bit your lip. The pain was clear as day on his face and it was making your chest ache.

"Well, anyway. I thought maybe she would go off for a couple months, do whatever it was she thought she was missin' out on. Parties, college... other men," he added the last part quietly, and you dropped your gaze to the floor. "Get it out of her system, y'know? But she just... never came back. Eventually, the calls came less and less, and I put two and two together. Didn't even get a courtesy call before I got served with the papers."

He rubbed his eyes, trying so hard not to look like a blubbering idiot in front of you. You reached your hand out and placed it gently on his knee, giving him a reassuring squeeze. He dropped his hand from his face to cover yours, staring at your coupled hands for a moment.

"Joel-"

"It was just so fuckin' hard on Sarah, y'know?" he said, his voice cracking. "I had no idea what to tell her. She cried almost every night, askin' me why her mom didn't love her anymore."

"Oh, Joel," you whispered, unable to hold back any longer. You closed the small gap between you, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and pulling him into your chest, your fingers gently raking through his hair. "I'm so sorry," you told him, burying your nose in the hair on top of his head, breathing in the citrus scent from his shampoo.

He didn't say a word. He just tugged you closer and closed his eyes, leaning into your comforting touch with a deep sigh.

"I'm sorry," he finally managed to croak out. "I'm throwin' way too much at you, I know you didn't sign up for this."

"Shh," you whispered into his hair, then tilted his face up to look at you, his dark brown eyes glassy with unshed tears. "It's okay," you murmured, pressing a soft kiss against his lips. A solitary tear slipped down his cheek when he pulled back to look deep into your eyes.

"It's okay," you repeated, wiping away the tear with the pad of your thumb before placing another gentle kiss against his lips.

He hummed contently against your mouth, sliding his hand up to the back of your neck and pressing his lips more firmly against your own, scared to let you go because if he did, he was sure he would fall apart.

Your grip on his hair tightened as he leaned forward, one strong arm wrapped around your midsection and the other pressed against your back. You mumbled something against his mouth when he tried to lay you down and knocked over a small pile of DVDs.

"Fuck," he whispered and, oh god, the way he said it made your legs turn to jelly and your cheeks flare with heat.

Frustrated, he tightened his grip around you and lifted you up, refusing to break the kiss. A tiny, high pitched squeak slipped past your lips as you wrapped your legs around his hips, letting him carry you to his bed.

He laid you down carefully on top of his plush, navy striped comforter. You sighed into his mouth, your legs loosening around his waist and falling open while you dragged your hands out of his hair and down to his shoulders, wrapping your fingers around his biceps to keep him close. He hovered above you, balancing all his weight on his elbows while his fingers played with the ends of your impossibly soft hair.

He slipped his tongue easily past your lips with a low groan, the noise going straight to your core, making the ache between your legs almost painful while your tongue danced with his, the two already so familiar with each other.

You tipped your head back with a gasp, desperate for air, but he kept going, unable to stop himself. His lips brushed against your jaw before his teeth and prickly beard scraped against the sensitive skin behind your earlobe. You let out a needy whimper and arched your back at the sensation, pushing your breasts into his broad chest as goosebumps spread over your whole body.

"Oh god, Joel," you whined softly, squeezing your eyes shut.

"Yeah, baby?" he replied, his voice thick and muffled against your neck. Baby. Jesus, this man was unraveling you so fast, it was making your head spin.

"I-I know we said this was casual, but-" the words got trapped in your throat as you cut yourself off, unable to finish your thought.

"I know," he said, his voice strained. "Fuck, I know."

He lifted his head away from your neck as he stared down at you, patting your hair back and away from your face as he panted slightly for breath.

You looked up at him, eyes watering as you tried not to think about your time coming to an end in a couple short weeks. You could tell he was thinking the same but didn't want to say it, the pain behind his eyes was obvious.

He blinked a couple times, the clouds clearing as he forced himself to focus on the present. He had you here in his arms, in his bed, underneath him right now. And he was going to be damned if he didn't soak up every single second.

He leaned back down and locked his lips on yours again, this time moving slower, more gentle and tender. He wanted to treat you right. You deserved it, and he wasn't going to give you anything less than what you deserved while he still had you.

You loosened your grip on his arms and allowed your hands to drift to the buttons of his flannel, slowly and shakily undoing them. His heart began to slam against his chest when he realized what you were doing, his mind going fuzzy with desire.

He pulled his head back when you were about halfway down his shirt, looking down hazily at your fingers working open the buttons as he desperately tried to think straight.

"Dad?" Sarah called from downstairs, the front door slamming shut. "Are you here?"

"Shit," Joel mumbled, scrambling off of you as he clumsily tried to redo his buttons. You jumped off the bed, leaning over so you could see into the mirror above his dresser, raking your hands through your tangled hair and quickly fixing your sweater.

"Yeah!" Joel shouted back, glancing over at you to make sure you were decent. "Sorry," he whispered, but you just grinned. Then his eyes fell to the half wrapped presents on the floor.

"Wait! Don't come up-" he called out as he heard her skipping up the steps. Joel grabbed your arm and pulled you out of the room, closing the door behind you both just in time.

"What? Why?" Sarah asked, then froze when she saw you. She looked up at Joel, then back to you, and a slow smile spread across her face.

"Ohhh..." she said with her hands on her hips. "Now I see."

"N-no, it's not what it looks like, she was just helpin' me wrap some gifts," Joel stammered, jutting his thumb over his shoulder. You shifted your weight nervously as you looked back and forth between them.

"Then why are you missing a button on your shirt?"

You both glanced down at his flannel, and she was right. He missed fixing a button in all the chaos. Your face flushed beet red as you stared at the ground while Joel hurriedly fixed the button, cursing under his breath. When you dared to look back up at his daughter, she was smirking playfully at you. Joel cleared his throat.

"Sarah, this is-"

"Yeah, I know, I remember from the party. The pretty dress, right?" she asked, and you nodded.

"Yeah, that's right. Nice to see you again," you said awkwardly.

She nodded, still smirking and looking at you and Joel. You could tell she loved catching her dad in this uncomfortable situation.

"Oh, crap. I forgot. Uncle Tommy is waiting for you in the driveway, said he needed your help unloading some work stuff out from the back of his truck," Sarah said.

"Ah, dammit, alright. You okay for a couple minutes?" he asked you, eyebrows raised.

"Of course," you said. He nodded, walking down the hall past Sarah, muttering "be good" to her as he walked by.

You listened as Joel made his way down the stairs and out the front door, leaving you and Sarah in silence, still staring at one another.

"I'm sorry, we really were wrapping gifts," you assured her.

"It's okay," she said with a shrug. "Last year he used duct tape on my presents, I know he needs the help."

You giggled, causing her to laugh, as well.

"Do you play an instrument?" you asked, just noticing the case on the floor next to her feet.

"Yeah, violin. I had practice after school today," she said, picking it up.

"Oh, cool. I played piano growing up, but I was never any good," you said, sliding your hands in the back pockets of your jeans.

"I have my school's Christmas recital on Friday," she said. "My first solo."

"Oh my god!" you said, clapping your hands together, genuinely impressed. "That's incredible! You must be so excited!"

"Yeah, at first, but now I'm getting nervous," she said, glancing down at the case in her hand. "You wanna hear me play?"

"Duh. Absolutely," you said with a grin. Her eyes lit up and a huge smile spread across her face again.

"O-okay. This is my room right here," she said, turning to her right and opening the door. "Sorry it's messy, my dad's gonna kill me."

"It's totally fine," you said, walking in and sitting down at the edge of her bed. You glanced around the room as she set up her music stand. On the pink walls, she had posters up of her favorite bands with a calendar and string lights draped across the room.

"I really like your room," you said, squinting to look at the stickers and drawings she had on her headboard.

"Thanks," she said sheepishly. "My dad let me do whatever I wanted."

You were about to comment on the various trophies she had on her windowsill when Sarah spoke again.

"Just so you know, I don't mind that you're seeing my dad."

Your eyes shot up to hers in surprise, not sure what to say. You hadn't really had a chance to talk to Joel about your relationship and how that would affect his daughter.

"He's been in such a good mood this past week, and he won't tell me but I know it's because of you," she said, pinning you with a familiar brown gaze.

"Oh, that's so sweet, Sarah," you said, finally finding your voice. "Thank you. That means a lot."

"You're welcome," she said. "I just want him to be happy again."

You dropped your gaze to your lap, your chest tightening at the thought of Joel being so lonely all these years.

"Me, too," you whispered, still looking down. Sarah regarded you for a minute before slapping her palms against the tops of her thighs and leaned down to pick up her violin.

"You ready?" she asked. You looked up and nodded, giving her an encouraging smile and sat back to listen as she began playing a hauntingly beautiful version of 'Silent Night'.

Sarah got about halfway through the song when she hit the wrong note and abruptly stopped, dropping her chin to her chest in frustration.

"Hey, it's okay," Joel heard you say softly as he walked back up the stairs. He paused at the top, right outside Sarah's room to listen.

"It's okay to make mistakes. Just go slower, take your time. Anything worthwhile takes time," you told her, and he smiled when he heard his earlier words to you repeated back to his daughter. He took a step forward to lean against the doorframe and watch the two of you, your back to him as you sat on her bed.

"Okay," Sarah said, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes before lifting the violin to her chin and starting over.

Joel listened to Sarah play the same song he's heard a million times already in just the past month alone, but kept his eyes trained on you. The way you gave her your full, undivided attention and encouraged her with a smile or a thumbs up when she would glance over at you shyly made his chest ache.

When Sarah successfully finished the song with no mistakes, you jumped up from the bed, clapping and cheering for her, making Sarah giggle and hide behind her hands.

Fuck, this was going to be so hard.

"Dad?" Sarah asked the next morning over her bowl of cereal.

"Yeah, baby girl?" he replied, frowning as he pulled his bread from the toaster. He sucked his fingertips into his mouth, trying to bring some relief to the quickly reddening skin.

"Can your friend come to my recital tomorrow?"

Joel froze, his fingers still pressed against his tongue as he slowly turned around to look at her. He dropped his hand and took a deep breath.

"I don't know if that's such a good idea," he replied.

"You don't think she would wanna go?" Sarah asked, her eyebrows pinched together.

"No, it's not that, I'm sure she would," he said, trying to find the right words.

"Then what's the problem?"

Joel sighed and picked his mug up from the counter, then walked over to join her at the table.

"She doesn't live here, baby. She's goin' back to New York in another week or so, I don't want you gettin' too attached," he finally admitted, watching Sarah closely as she considered his words.

"Well, you guys like each other, right?" she asked, and Joel smirked.

"Yeah, but it ain't that simple."

"Yes, it is, Dad," she said, rolling her eyes and dipping her spoon back into her bowl. "My friend Katy was dating this guy last year and he switched schools over the summer. They're still together, it doesn't matter," Sarah said with a shrug, taking a bite of cereal.

If the topic didn't fill Joel with a sense of dread, he would have chuckled at the comparison, but instead he just sat there quietly, watching his daughter as she finished her cereal and scrolled on her phone.

Sarah pulled on her backpack and was sliding on her sneakers to catch the bus when she called back to Joel over her shoulder.

"Just ask her, okay? Please, Dad?"

Joel sighed, hanging his head between his shoulders and paused his hands over the dishes in the sink.

"Alright," he relented, and he heard Sarah clap her hands behind him before slamming the front door shut.

You: good morning :)

Joel Miller: Good Morning, sweetheart. I didn't think you would be up this early.

You: couldn't fall back asleep. What are you doing

Joel Miller: Just getting to work. Why couldn't you fall back asleep?

You thought about it for a minute from under the pile of blankets on your bed, rolling to your side before answering.

You: I was thinking about you...

Joel Miller: Good thoughts, I hope?

You: VERY ;)

His throat went dry when he opened the text. He glanced around outside his car window, making sure he was still the only one on the job site before replying.

Joel Miller: What are you trying to tell me, baby?

You smirked and bit down on your lip.

You: I was wishing you were in bed with me right now

"Shit," he muttered to himself, glancing around once again before adjusting his pants.

Joel Miller: Me too, what are you wearing?

The answer came back almost immediately.

You: nothing

He groaned and rubbed his palms roughly over his face.

Joel Miller: You're killing me, baby. I have to get working in a minute.

You: i'm sorry ;)

You: I promised my parents I would go to dinner with them tonight, but are you free tomorrow?

Joel took a deep breath, trying to clear the onslaught of inappropriate thoughts from his head when he remembered his promise to Sarah.

Joel Miller: It's Sarah's recital tomorrow night. She asked me to invite you this morning, did you want to go?

He nervously chewed his cheek for a moment before sending another text.

Joel Miller: No pressure, I can tell her you're busy.

He sent his second text right as your reply came through.

You: I would love to!

He grinned and raked his fingers through his hair. Tommy's knuckles tapped on the outside of Joel's window, making him jump. He held up a finger before sending you a quick answer.

Joel Miller: Sounds great. I'll pick you up. Try to go back to sleep. Dream of me.

Joel opened the door and slid his phone in his back pocket, a stupid grin etched across his face as he joined his brother in the half-built storefront they were working on.

"Oh man, you got it bad," Tommy said with a chuckle when he saw the look on Joel's face.

"Alright, what do you think of this one?" you asked Cassie as you stepped out of the bathroom modeling the sixth dress of the day.

"I liked the red one better," she said, glancing up from her phone.

"Are you sure? This one is a little more chic," you said, twisting around to look at your backside in the mirror.

"It's a high school recital, Buck. I don't think anyone is expecting 'chic'," she teased, and you rolled your eyes.

"Well, I just want to look nice, is all," you said, sitting next to her on your bed in a huff. You tapped your phone screen, frowning when all you had was another text from Sydney and nothing from Joel. You opened it up anyway, curiosity getting the best of you.

Sydney: OMG!!!!!!

You sent back three question marks and locked your phone with a sigh.

"You still wanna get together next week so we can look at apartments online for you?" she asked.

"Yeah," you said sadly, looking out the window.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," you told her. "Just not ready to go back yet."

"Could that be because of a certain sexy contractor?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at you.

"Shut up," you smirked, tossing a pillow at her lightly.

"Ooo you like him! Lookit how red you're getting!"

"I'm gonna kill you when that baby's out, you know that, right?" you giggled.

"Yeah, yeah, sure," Cassie said, looking back down at her phone as the smile slowly faded from her face. "You know you don't have to go back, right?"

"What do you mean? My job is there, my life is there... everything is there," you replied. "Of course I have to go back."

"What life, though?" she asked, and you frowned at her. "Seriously, Buck. Aside from your job, which you hate, what's left?"

"Well, my friends are there. And I don't hate my job that much. I mean, everyone hates their job a little bit," you said with a shrug.

"Is this what you expected to do when you were in college? Is this what you wanted?" Cassie pressed, sitting up on the bed. "Are you even happy?"

You paused, letting her words roll around in your head for a moment.

"Well, I mean..." you trailed off, not sure how to answer her question.

"If you have to think about it this long, I think you know the answer," your sister said quietly. You groaned and rolled off the bed.

"I'm going back. I have to. I can't just give up because some guy broke my heart," you said, turning around so she could unzip the back of your dress.

"I'm just saying, think about it," Cassie replied. "I wouldn't hate it if my child's aunt was in their life more than twice a year!" she called after you as you shut the door to the bathroom.

Joel eagerly jogged up the porch steps and rang the doorbell, very aware of the camera this time while he fiddled with the cuffs on his dark red button down shirt. He heard high heels clicking on the other side of the door and the corners of his mouth turned up into a smile, which quickly vanished when you opened the door and he saw the dress you were wearing.

"Hi," you said with a shy smile, pulling a soft looking white cardigan on over your shoulders.

He thought he had greeted you. He could have sworn he said something, anything, that didn't make him look like a complete idiot, but apparently nothing came out because you scrunched your eyebrows together when you saw his face.

"Are you okay?" you asked, pulling the door shut behind you.

"Yeah, it's just - Jesus, you look so good," he managed to finally say, tilting his head back to stare up at the roof of the porch for a moment, taking a deep breath.

"Thank you," you said with a giggle. "You don't look half bad, yourself."

He rubbed his forehead, exasperated and flustered before pulling you quickly into his arms and latching his mouth onto yours with a groan.

"Joel," you pulled back breathlessly with a small smile and leaned your head to the side, trying to silently remind him of the doorbell. His eyes raked over you hungrily before shaking his head and pulling you back into a deep kiss.

Fuck the camera, let them see.

You giggled against his mouth, causing him to smile and break the kiss.

"Come on, I wanna get good seats," you said, rubbing your thumb over his lower lip to wipe off your lipstick that transferred. It caused his stomach to clench. That sweet, little intimate gesture made him ache for more so badly that he could hardly breathe.

He walked you around the front of his truck, opening the door and giving you a hand so you could hop onto the seat, the gorgeous red dress you were wearing hugging your curves just right and distracting him to no end.

On the walk around to the driver's side, he mentally scolded himself, reminding himself over and over that tonight was a big deal for his little girl and he needed to stay focused.

As he drove down the street, he realized that his hand instinctively found yours across the seat, his body craving the warmth and softness of your own. How on earth was he going to go back to the life he had before, now that he knows what it's like to bask in the heat of your touch?

Once he got to the school, he found a parking spot and jumped out of the truck. You had figured out by now that he preferred you to wait so he could open the car door for you, so you did. Swinging your legs over the side of the seat, you slid down into his waiting arms, your hands gently coming to rest on the tops of his shoulders. He gazed down at you with his arms loosely hanging around your waist. You saw his adam's apple bob in his throat while he let himself get lost in your warm, beautiful eyes. You lifted a finger from his shoulder, tracing an invisible line down the side of his cheek as you stared up at him with your plush lips parted so invitingly that it made his knees weak.

"Joel! Hey!" Tommy's voice called out from behind, snapping you both out of the moment. Joel sighed and untangled himself from you, taking your hand and leading you forward so he could shut the door before turning around to find his brother.

You could see the family resemblance immediately as Tommy approached you with a wide grin. His hair was a bit darker and a lot longer, and his beard was less full than Joel's, but he had the same soft, brown eyes that you had grown to know and love.

Love? Oh, no.

"Hey, Tommy," Joel said as he got closer, his hand pressed firmly on the small of your back. "This is-"

"Oh, I know who she is. How're you doin', darlin'?" Tommy asked, pulling you into a bear hug, taking you by surprise.

"I-I'm good," you squeaked shyly once he released you. "Nice to meet you."

"I've been dyin' to meet the little lady who's got my brother all wrapped up," he replied with a grin.

"Tommy!" Joel seethed warningly at your side, but you just giggled.

"I'm just messin' around. She knows that, right?" he said, shoving his hands in his coat pocket and rolling on the balls of his feet. "Supposed to snow next week, can you believe it?"

"Yeah, I heard we might get a couple feet," Joel said, steering you toward the doors to the auditorium. "Better get your shovel ready."

You settled in between the two brothers as you found a decent spot in the fourth row. Joel draped his arm around the back of your chair while he chatted with Tommy about work. You inadvertently leaned to the side and rested your shoulder against his chest as you glanced around the room, admiring the lit up garlands around the windows and Christmas trees on the stage with fake presents underneath.

When their conversation died down, Tommy pulled out his phone and began scrolling through social media, holding it low between his spread knees with his chin tucked into his chest.

Joel tilted his face forward to press his lips on the top of your head, breathing in a deep and contented breath. A small smile played across your lips as you turned your gaze up towards him, resting your cheek gently on his shoulder. He looked down at you with a smile and planted a chaste kiss on your forehead, and as each of you slid your eyes closed for a moment, Tommy angled his phone to snap a quick picture, smiling to himself and making a mental note to show his brother later.

The lights dimmed and you all straightened up in your seats. You listened to the music teacher make a small speech at the beginning and politely clapped afterwards. You saw Sarah twice throughout the concert as part of the orchestra, smiling at how focused and beautiful she looked in her white dress. As the concert wound down, Sarah finally came out on stage for her solo, and the three of you eagerly leaned forward. At the last minute, you remembered to pull out your phone and start a video, telling yourself you were doing it for Joel so that he could be in the moment, but you knew you would end up watching it by yourself when you went back to New York City.

The performance was flawless. When it was over, the three of you lept up from your seats, cheering, jumping and clapping, making her wave and blush as she exited the stage. You sat down, giggling, as the people surrounding you gave you all polite smiles and chuckles, then quieted down for the finale.

When the lights came back up, everyone stood from their seats, murmuring and laughing while waiting for their kids to come out from backstage and take pictures. You saw a flash of white out of the corner of your eye and moved out of the way just in time for Sarah to run and jump up into Joel's arms, burying her face in his neck. He squeezed his eyes shut, his arms wrapped around her tightly, murmuring praise in her ear. You felt warmth spread across your chest as you watched them have their moment, the corners of your mouth turned up into a smile with your hands clasped together against your chest.

He let her down gently and she turned to give Tommy a quick hug. He spun her around, making her giggle and fidget with her dress before she turned to you.

"You came!" she exclaimed, wrapping her arms loosely around your waist. Your eyes widened in surprise, not expecting such affection from her, but you quickly returned the hug.

"Of course I came! Thank you for inviting me," you said, pulling back with a grin. "You were absolutely perfect, I took a video, I'll send it to your dad so he can show you later."

"I did exactly what you told me, I slowed down and took my time," she beamed, and it gave you a new feeling deep in your chest that you never felt before.

"That's great, Sarah," you replied, your throat tight with emotion. Tommy dropped his gaze from you and ticked his jaw to the side, finally understanding why Joel was hesitant to let Sarah know about the two of you.

"Dad?" Sarah asked, turning away from you. "Can I sleep over at Katy's? She's having a bunch of girls over and her mom said it was okay."

"Uh, sure, baby girl. Don't you need clothes and stuff?"

"I have stuff I keep here in my locker for gym," she said.

"Well, alright, lemme talk to her mom first," he replied, glancing around the room.

"Thank you! She's right over here," she said, grabbing his hand. "Thanks for coming!" she called back last minute over her shoulder to you and Tommy, and you both smiled and waved as she dragged her father across the room.

"She's so talented," you said, turning to Tommy. He looked down at you and gave you a weak smile.

"Yeah, she's somethin' else," he said with a nod. "Hey, listen. I'm havin' a get together next week at my house. Little Christmas party, I guess. I invited a guy I met at your parents' house - Josh? He's comin' with his wife, Joel and Sarah'll be there, I'd love for you to come by if you can."

"Josh is my brother in law," you clarified for him. "That sounds great, I'll be there, thank you."

"You're welcome," Tommy said, then his brows pinched together as he opened his mouth again to speak. "Joel might kill me for sayin' this, but you gotta know how happy you've -"

"Ready to go?" Joel asked, sneaking up beside you. Tommy cleared his throat and gave his brother an innocent smile.

"Yep," you replied, dropping your hand to find his at your side, lacing your fingers together and giving him a gentle squeeze.

After saying goodbye to Tommy, Joel slowly led you through the parking lot to his truck, desperately trying to think of something else you could do, not ready to drop you off yet. He knew the time you had together was coming to an end, and he wanted to soak up every precious second. Especially after the way he saw you with Sarah: so warm and sweet and patient. He couldn't remember the last time he saw his daughter's eyes light up that way.

He prided himself on being a good father since his wife left. Always making sure to put Sarah first, that she got everything she could ever want or need. Especially his love. When his ex abandoned them, he made sure Sarah got every ounce of love he had, hoping it would help make up for the loss. But as hard as he tried, he could never fully fill both roles. There were just some things that a mother provided for her daughter that Joel couldn't give.

He didn't realize it until he saw you with Sarah earlier that night, and then it felt like everything shifted into focus for the first time in his life.

He held out his hand to help you get back into his truck, making sure your legs were safely tucked in before he gently shut the door.

Sitting in the driver's seat gripping the steering wheel, he stared straight ahead for a moment in complete silence, the keys still in his coat pocket while his mind reeled.

"Is everything okay?" you asked timidly. He blinked and turned to you.

"Yeah," he said hoarsely. He swallowed and looked at his watch.

"You wanna get coffee or somethin'? I know it's gettin' late but I'm sure some place's open," he said, deep in thought as he considered the cafés nearby.

"Don't you have coffee at your house?" you asked shyly. His eyes snapped up to yours and he saw the flush creeping up your neck and the rapid rise and fall of your chest.

Oh.

"Yeah, yes," he croaked, nervously clearing his throat. "Let's do that. I have- yeah, good idea," he stammered, fumbling with the keys in his pocket.

You smirked as you watched his shaky hand turn the key in the ignition. He twisted around to back out of the parking spot, and this time you gave into temptation, unbuckling your seatbelt so you could slide over and tuck yourself under his arm. He immediately pulled you closer, not even caring that you weren't wearing your seatbelt. He would make sure to drive safe. Nothing could possibly ruin that night. He wouldn't let it.

At stop lights, you would run your hand up his chest and plant small kisses against the corner of his mouth, filling him with a radiating bliss he never felt before.

Once you got back to his house, you shrugged off your sweater and trailed behind him as he made his way into the kitchen. You leaned against the wall and watched as he opened one of the cupboards - the one with the small birds carved into the bottom - and pulled down a can of coffee.

"I don't think I have any decaf," he said turning to look at you.

"I don't want coffee, Joel," you said lowly. He swallowed roughly and put the can on the counter.

"What d'you want, then?"

You pushed yourself off the wall and slowly walked towards him, his eyes skating up and down your body as you approached. Wrapping your arms around his waist, you tilted your face up to gaze at him, your mouth hovering over his own.

"I want you."

His eyes fluttered closed as your lips slotted against his, his rough hands immediately coming up to cup your smooth face, holding you firmly against his mouth. Christ, he would never get tired of kissing you. If he could do it every single day for the rest of his life, he would. He knew it seemed crazy. He knew you just met, but he couldn't help the way you made him feel.

"Let's go upstairs," you whispered, nipping at his lower lip.

He couldn't speak. He just nodded in a daze and let you lead him coyly up the steps, then turned around to walk backwards down the hall towards his bedroom so you could pull him tightly against your body. His big hands gripped your waist while his tongue slipped past your lips, searching for its mate.

You reached behind you blindly, your hand fighting with the doorknob as his big frame caged you in against the wood, his masculine scent invading your senses and making it difficult to think. Finally, the door swung open and you both stumbled in, a giggle erupting from your throat as your fingers got to work undoing the buttons on his dress shirt.

You hurriedly tugged his button down off, leaving it in a heap on the floor as you slid your palms underneath the white t-shirt he had on, feeling the warm skin of his stomach and chest for the first time.

"Off," you whispered, your heart getting stuck in your throat when he yanked the shirt over his head, leaving his upper body completely bare to you. Your mouth went dry as you drank him in, then lunged forward, your lips brushing up his sternum until you reached his collarbone. You sucked on a bit of tanned skin there with a moan, then slipped your tongue out to press wetly against the red mark you left, feeling drunk off the taste of his sweat.

He gently pushed you backwards so he could ease you down onto his bed, his breath growing erratic and desperate with each little bite you left on his chest. God, has anyone ever desired him this much before? Has he really been missing out on this his entire life?

"Baby, we're gonna have to stop soon if you don't want this to go any further," he murmured. He found himself in the familiar position of hovering above you while his hand slid down your leg and toyed with the hem of your dress.

"I don't think I can take much more, tell me to stop," he whispered when you didn't answer, running the tip of his nose softly against your cheek.

"I don't want you to stop," you gasped as his fingers slipped underneath your dress. You tilted your head back and moaned when you felt his fingertips brush against the damp fabric of your panties.

His mouth hungrily devoured the exposed cleavage of your breasts, growing frustrated with the fabric of your dress keeping him from seeing all of you.

"Sit up," he demanded, leaning back and pulling his hand from between your legs. You obeyed, and he made short work of your zipper, pulling it all the way down so you could shimmy out, leaving you in just your underwear.

"Oh, fuck," he whispered when he realized you weren't wearing a bra. You let yourself fall back gently on the bed, spreading your arms out above your head so he could see every inch of you in the moonlight.

He couldn't believe this was actually happening. He kept waiting for his alarm to go off and reality to slap him across the face, but it never came. His heart was pounding so fast, he was sure you could hear it as he leaned back down and nibbled at your exposed jaw while his calloused hand cupped your soft breast, his thumb flicking over your hardening nipple.

You scraped your nails over his shoulders and down his chest as you arched your back, pressing into his hand, needing to feel the heat of his skin against your own. Your stomach flipped as you made your way down to his belt, and with shaky fingers, pulled hastily at the leather.

Yanking the belt through the loops with one swift motion, you flung it across the room, making him chuckle against your skin. When you started to work on popping open the button on his dress pants, a devastating thought suddenly occurred to him.

"Shit, wait," he said, putting his hand on top of yours. You frowned up at him, your chest heaving, as you gave him a confused look.

"I don't have any protection," he said through gritted teeth. He hung his head and squeezed his eyes shut angrily. "I-I haven't been with anyone since my ex, and I never thought... fuck," he said, clenching his jaw.

You weighed your options for about half a second before tugging his chin up, forcing him to look at you.

"I'm still on birth control," you told him, searching his eyes. "I mean, only if you're comfortable with it, we don't have to," you said, but in your head you were chanting please, please, please.

"Are you sure?" he asked, panting for air. "I don't wanna make you feel like -"

"Yes," you said, cutting him off by grabbing his face. "Yes. I'm sure, Joel. Please," you whimpered, pulling him back down to you, his mouth crashing down on yours again.

"Please," you whispered again, tipping your head back as his lips left a trail of soft kisses down your throat. "Please, Joel, I need you."

His mouth stuttered against your neck. Hearing you beg and say you needed him when he never thought he would ever be needed like this in his whole life made his mind go blank.

"Okay," he rasped. "Okay, baby."

He tugged at the zipper on his black pants and pulled them off as quickly as he could without leaving you. You reached down to help him, hooking your fingers over the band of his boxers and shoving them down. He kicked them off before yanking down your panties, dropping them on the floor next to his clothes.

You eagerly spread your legs so he could settle his hips between them. You glanced down with a small gasp when you saw the size of him and you felt your cheeks flare. Jesus Christ.

He didn't seem to notice your reaction when he was too wrapped up in staring at the wet heat between your legs, pulsing and waiting, just for him. He slid a finger gently between your folds, making you moan and your back arch. Fuck, he loved how responsive you were to his touch.

He readjusted so he was kneeling between your legs. His palms slid up your calves, past your knees and to your inner thighs, pressing them down into the mattress so you were spread wide.

He lined himself up at your center, glancing up at you quickly to make sure you were ready. You swallowed and nodded, your eyes filled with desire, desire for him, something he still couldn't fathom but decided not to question. He pressed forward gently, notching himself against you before falling forward on his elbows.

He kissed the tip of your nose as he eased himself inside you, pausing when he heard you gasp and felt you tense under him.

"More," you finally croaked, your nails coming up to rake against his scalp. He let out the breath he was holding and pushed in further, his eyes fluttering shut and his mouth falling open as he felt you slowly stretch around him so perfectly, like you were made just for him.

"Oh, god," he sighed, dropping his face to the crook of your neck after he fully sheathed himself inside you. He dragged his mouth across your chest, leaving a wet trail from his tongue and red marks from his scratchy beard in his wake. He waited until he felt your muscles relax under him before he slowly rolled his hips, dragging himself in and out as his teeth scraped over your tightening nipples. You moaned his name softly, the sound permanently etched in his brain, a sound he will refuse to forget for the rest of his life.

He began to roll his hips faster at your encouragement, becoming obsessed with the way you felt and the sounds you made, and it was all for him. He spent so much of his life giving to everyone around him, he never truly felt like anyone was able or willing to give him what he needed in return until now. The recognition was depressing and freeing at the same time. Now that he finally had what he always wanted, what he always needed, he was going to lose you and there was nothing he could do about it.

Each moan from your throat and each kiss from your lips dragged him down deeper and deeper until he collided head first with the stunning, yet so painfully obvious, realization that he was deliriously in love with you. It was insane, he knew that. But it didn't make it any less true.

"Joel," you gasped, pulling him out of his trance and back to the present.

"Yeah, baby? I'm here. I'm right here," he whispered, planting soft kisses all over your face.

You bit down on your lower lip and squeezed your eyes shut. The sheer intensity behind his gaze coupled with the agony of only getting to experience this for one more short week made tears burn in the backs of your eyes.

You felt your orgasm begin to swell deep in your belly while your breath became more ragged and your vision went spotty. It shouldn't feel this good. This was cruel, to be able to experience something like this just to have it brutally ripped away from you. It wasn't fair, yet you never wanted it to stop.

He could feel it. It's been years, and it was never, ever like this, but he still knew. The way you whimpered and clawed at his back while your walls squeezed him so tightly, he thought he might pass out.

"Open your eyes," he panted. "I wanna look at you."

You forced your eyes open, now unable to hold back the tears that pooled there as two drops trickled down the side of your face, getting lost in your hair.

"It's okay, I got you," he whispered lovingly, staring deep into your eyes, seeing everything you didn't dare say out loud.

"You can let go, baby," he told you, his hips snapping against you ruthlessly, desperate to come at the same time.

You felt the wave rip through you like fire, the power and emotion behind it unlike anything you ever felt before. More tears poured from your eyes as you cried out his name, your thighs squeezing his hips so tightly you weren't sure you would be able to stand after.

He followed seconds later with a deep groan, spilling himself deep inside you while murmuring praise and wiping away your tears with his thumb.

"Why're you cryin', did I hurt you?" he asked, his voice filled with so much concern that it broke your heart. You shook your head, wiping the tears away with the back of your hand, but fresh ones just took their place.

"C'mon, talk to me," he urged, leaning up a bit as he softened inside you.

"What are we gonna do, Joel?" you blubbered pathetically. He took a shaky breath in and tenderly tucked your hair behind your ear.

"I don't know, baby, but we'll figure somethin' out. We gotta," he said with a sigh.

"I can't lose you," you whispered, pressing your forehead against his and closing your eyes.

"You'll never lose me, I can promise you that," he replied, pressing a gentle kiss against your swollen lips.

He waited until your tears slowed down before sliding out of you with a hiss. Rolling off to your side, he wrapped his arms around your middle and pulled you close against his chest, and as you finally drifted off in his embrace, he thought about all of the options available before you, determined to find a solution.

Tag list: @lola8888673 @pedropascalsbbg @nandan11 @sushiumex @serenadingtigers @jjlevin @survivingandenduring @amyispxnk @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @merz-8 @wonyoungismind @fandomscollide @anoverwhelmingdin @cayleejx16 @msjjekyll @lizzie-cakes @hexedbywanda @harriedandharassed @joeldjarin - lmk if i missed anyone, if your name is crossed out it means it won't let me tag you

[lovecla]

IF YOU LOVE ME, LET ME KNOW | jack hughes.

chapter five:

<last chapter> <next chapter>

➴ warnings: fighting, misunderstanding, mentions of cheating

➴ word count: 3.2k

➴ author’s note: shit hit the fan yall… who the hell is going to fix this mess..

YOU woke up at ten to two after sleeping for seven hours straight. One thing about stressed you, is that you'd sleep for twenty-four hours if given the opportunity.

But you were thirsty and you needed to get your hands on a glass of water before you died from dehydration.

So, you got up, and made your way to the kitchen, only stopping when you saw your phone blowing up on the counter.

Frowning, you picked it up, confused with the hundreds of notifications on your lock screen.

You completely forgot about your need for water. With your heart on your mouth, you sat on one of your stools, unlocking your phone and texting Grace.

Usually, you didn't care about gossip. You'd always just joke about it on Twitter with your fans and move on.

People liked to invent things and you couldn't exactly stop them. So you just let it happen.

But apparently, Jack was involved in this too. Which left you confused because people didn't know about you two. Or at least, that's what your media team would say, whenever you had a meeting with them— a weekly occurrence, ever since the album was announced.

Typing your name on Google, you didn't have to dig too deep: an article published five hours ago was the first to show up. "Former Flames: NHL Star Jack Hughes Moves On with New Flame After Breakup with Pop Singer, Sophia Montenegro".

What the fuck?

Opening it, you could swear your heart would stop any moment. Hands shaking, you read every line, thinking of everything and nothing at the same time.

It seems love off the ice is just as fast-paced as the action on it for NHL star Jack Hughes. The hockey player, known for his fierce plays and competitive edge, is making headlines for his personal life as well. After a low-profile breakup with pop sensation Sophia Montenegro, Jack Hughes has already moved on-and he's not keeping it a secret.

According to our anonymous sources, the athlete and singer had started dating back in April, after they met at the New Jersey Devils [Jack Hughes' team] charity gala, and kept everything in the dark for six months straight: nothing more than a few Instagram comments and likes to prove anything.

However, despite the chemistry, the relationship ended after Jack was seen with one of his exes last night, Ava Mitchell. Jack Hughes is known for his short-term relationships so it wouldn't be anything new.

We hope Mrs. Montenegro is okay, after her second break-up in less than two years. Maybe our sweet girl, Sophia, has bad luck with relationships.

You didn't bother reading the rest, locking your phone and gently placing it on the counter again.

The rational part of your brain was telling you that none of that was true, and that this was just a gossip magazine doing what’s supposed to be doing, but you recognised the girl in the photo, it was the same girl on Jack’s lap yesterday. And that was obviously Jack, holding her hand like some kind of loving boyfriend.

You sighed, running your hands through your hair. You knew that something like this would happen. All of the good moments you had with Jack apparently were just that: good moments. And now, bad memories.

You knew what you had to do. Keep going, just like you did when Harris broke up with you over text after cheating on you the night before. Keep going, just like you did when your name got dragged into the mud because of that.

But doing that with Jack, for some crazy reason, was harder than you thought it’d be. Maybe because you had a lot of expectations and watching them getting crushed right in front of you sucked.

Your phone buzzed in front of you, Grace’s picture shining. You sighed, before picking it up. “Hi,” you whispered, remembering that you were still thirsty and this was the first word you said in seven hours.

“Hey, baby, how are you?” She sounded worried, and you understood her. This was the first somewhat scandal you’ve had in months. So yeah.

“I just read it…” you took a deep breath. “Gosh, what the hell. What happened after I left?”

You heard Grace move something around before she started speaking again. “Honey, I wish I could tell you something entirely different but… I did see Jack leaving with that girl. I am so sorry. Like, genuinely.”

Your entire body felt like it weighed three times more. Your heart shrank to the size of a pea and you could feel your hand tremble a little bit.

You had seen the picture, you knew that Jack had left the party with the girl but still. It hurt.

“Did you talk to him?” Grace asked, voice worried.

“No, I— Grace, I don’t know what to do,” you whispered, feeling something tickle your cheek. You wiped it with your hands, just to realize that it was tears. You were crying. “I like him so much. I had finally accepted it, I told you— I thought he felt the same.”

“I did too. I don’t know what happened. Maybe… God I hate to say this but maybe you should talk to him?”

You let out a wet laugh. “No way in hell I’m talking to him. I made that mistake with Harris. Every time he’d do something shitty, I’d go after him and talk to him, accept his excuses, his behavior. I’m not that Sophia anymore.”

“I know, I know… I just…” she sounded uncertain. “God. Why are men like this?”

You wiped your tears, smiling for the first time in hours.

“I don’t know.”

“Also, that song you sent me… is it about him?”

You were confused just for a second, before remembering the song you wrote last night— morning?

“Yeah,” you mumbled, feeling just the tiniest bit of embarrassment. “Couldn’t get it out of my head. What’d you think?”

“It’s perfect. Just like everything you write,” you could hear her smiling. You smiled too. “I love you so much, Soph.”

“I love you too, Grace. Don’t worry, I'll be fine,” you sounded like you were trying to convince yourself, and not her. “Let’s just focus on the album and the launching party, right? Fuck Jack Hughes.”

“Yes, you’re right. Fuck him and not in a good way!”

You laughed, feeling the pain inside your chest ease up a little bit.

It was going to be fine.

— ♡

JACK called you three times in the past three days.

You felt shitty not picking up any of his calls because you knew he was away for the entire week, but honestly, you weren’t ready to hear any of his excuses.

So drowning yourself in work was the answer for all of your problems. Day and night, you went to photoshoots and interviews, none of the questions being about you and Jack, thankfully. You knew it was all your team’s doing but still, it felt nice to talk about yourself and your work, and not about men who did nothing but make you hate yourself.

Grace thought you had to at least hear Jack out. But you knew that if you did that, the chances of you forgiving him were high. Higher than they should be. Because you’re still very much in love with him and want to be with him at all times.

“Good work today, guys,” Russel, your choreographer, shouted, everyone clapping together. You were all rehearsing for your launching party, a mini-concert with only a couple hundred people, something to introduce your album.

“Thank you, guys, love you.” You breathed, remembering how you should go back to the gym because singing and dancing at the same time required a lot of effort.

You headed back to your house, staring at the sunset through your car’s window, sighing loudly at the traffic in front of you. It was seven p.m. and you were tired and famished, thinking about all of the take-out options you could order when you got home.

“What the…” you muttered, when you tried entering your garage, but was unable to since there was a car there already. A car that you unfortunately knew very well. “The hell is he doing here?”

Jack was leaning against his car, a crazy thing to do during winter but whatever, wearing a beanie and a Devils hoodie, while looking at something in his phone.

He was supposed to be away. For a week.

Opening your door, you welcomed the cool breeze on your skin. The workout clothes felt too tight on your body and the bag on your hand felt too heavy but you held it tight. He still hadn’t noticed you so maybe you could walk past him without him noticing you?

“Hey, baby,” and yes, of course that didn’t work. “I’ve been waiting for you.”

You looked at him like he was out of his mind, but he just kissed your forehead and grabbed something from inside the car. A Five Guys takeout bag. Fuck him for knowing your favorite burger place.

“I got us food but I think the guy there messed with my order on purpose because he recognised me and he was wearing a Rangers pin which I thought was forbidden during work hours? But I never had a nine to five job so I can’t really tell.”

You continued to move, asking yourself why the hell Jack was so talkative today. Usually, he’d just answer your questions and leave it at that. But he must’ve spent too much time with Luke because damn, this man was a yapper now.

Opening the door, you let him in, not really sure why. Maybe Grace was right and you did need closure, but you expected to have this conversation with him through texts, and not face to face like right now.

He looked so dreamy. He’d shaved, so he looked eighteen years old all over again. His hair, hidden by the beanie, looked longer now and you desperately wanted to run your hands through it. He was standing there, cheeks and lips red, blue eyes looking directly at yours.

Why did he have to be so handsome? It’d all be much easier if he was ugly.

“You’re so quiet today, did something happen?” He asked, yanking you out of the train of thoughts about how handsome he was.

And suddenly, you were back in Harris’ living room, one year ago, watching as the man cried on your lap, apologizing over and over again, saying that he’d never lie to you and that he’d never let you down.

Your stomach was starting to hurt and you felt yourself breathing faster.

“I ran this conversation in my head a thousand times, but I never once imagined you’d just not talk about it and move on, y’know?” You mumbled, heart racing in your chest. “Was it worth it, Jack?”

His confused face made you hurt even more because, somehow, it looked genuine. “What are you talking about? Was what worth it?”

“So you’ll keep denying it?” You raise one eyebrow, feeling the sorrow being replaced by something uglier, something heavier. Something like anger.

“Denying what, Sophia?” He stepped closer, hands reaching to your body, which you dodged. If you’re going to do this, you’ll need every ounce of space in your house. “Sophia, what—”

“I know I have no right to be mad at you for this, because I know we were just fucking,” you smiled, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “Hell, I was the one who said I didn’t want a relationship first. So I understand why you didn’t reach out to me, why you’re not apologizing, why you’re playing dumb, but—”

“Sophia,” he cut you off, his voice one octave deeper. You shivered, watching as he frowned at you. “I don’t know why you’re saying all of this shit. What the hell happened?”

You looked at him, analyzing his face and, once again, seeing nothing but pure confusion in his expression. You found it hard to believe that he didn’t know about the article, didn’t know about how people were saying that no one stayed with you for a long time, didn’t know about his ex announcing to everyone on her Instagram page that they were together again.

But unfortunately, you also knew that Jack wasn’t a liar. He’d never been, and probably would never be.

“So you don’t know about the article?”

“Article?” He furrowed his eyebrows. “Are you talking about gossip pages on Instagram? Soph, you know the only thing I do in that fucking app is like your photos, watch the weird ass reels you send me, and send pictures of ugly animals to my brothers and say it looks like them,”

Pulling your phone from your pocket, you google the article that you had every word memorized by now with how much you’ve read it. Showing it to him, you saw his face go through all stages of emotions: confusion, anger and understanding.

“You didn’t know about this?”

“I don’t read the articles people write about me. I don’t give a fuck about people’s opinions,” he growled, handing your phone back to you and taking his beanie off so he could run his hands through his hair. “I don’t know who the hell sent that information about us.”

“Can’t you see that the problem here isn’t people knowing that we were fucking?” You snapped, almost crushing your phone with how hard you were gripping it. “The problem here, Jack, is you leaving that fucking party with your fucking ex, after she spent half of her night on your lap.”

“The hell is wrong with that, Sophia?” He snapped too, looking angry and annoyed at the same time. “You left with fucking Quinn and didn’t even say goodbye to me. Me leaving with Ava isn’t any fucking different.”

“‘Isn’t any fucking different?’ Fuck you, Jack. Fuck,” you touched his chest with your index finger. “You.”

“Sophia, what is going on? You’re mad at me because I left with Ava? She was fucking out of her mind, drunk as hell, and I just took her home!” He raised his arms, like that was enough of an explanation. “It’s not my fault someone took a picture of us leaving and wrote a fucking article about that.”

“I’m not mad at you, Jack,” you whispered, staring into his eyes, losing yourself all over again, just like you did six months ago. “I’m mad at myself for falling in love with you.”

You were both taken aback by your statement. You had zero intentions of telling Jack how you felt about him because that would just be too much humiliation to handle but now the shit hit the fan and he knew.

“It’s…” he stared, biting his lips and averting your gaze. “It’s not like I cheated on you, Sophia. We aren’t dating.”

Oh.

Right.

You knew something like this would happen and still. Your heart hurts all the same. It isn’t that serious, your brain was yelling at you, get a fucking grip.

“I know,” you whispered, trying to count your breathings. “I know that, Jack. You don’t need to tell me.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He stepped closer. “About how you feel?”

“Was it going to change anything?” Your voice quivered with sadness and you hated yourself for it. The plan was to tell him to fuck off and leave him but now you were almost crying and losing your shit in front of him.

“Yes, Sophia, fuck,” he put his hands on your arms, squeezing you slightly. “Of course it was!”

“Jack, no,” you freed yourself from his touch, walking around your living room, with your hands on your head. “I didn’t tell you that just to watch you pity me, I was trying to make a point. Don’t start lying now just for the sake of it.”

“Lying? I’m not fucking lying, Sophia,” he sounded angry now. “If you had told me this before, I would’ve—”

“‘Would’ve’ what?” You raised your voice too, tears now streaming down your face freely. “Would’ve said you’re in love with me too? Would’ve abandoned your whore days just to be with me? Fuck off, Hughes, we both know that isn’t true.”

“Just because you like to paint me as the man whore of the Devils it doesn’t mean that that is true,” he snapped, again. “I’ve been with you for six months now, and I never, not even once, touched another woman, or even thought about doing it. Because I just wanted you, Sophia, can’t you fucking see it?”

You sat on the couch, covering your face with your hands, trying to hide the fact that those words affected you more than you would ever admit.

“I get it that your fuckhead ex-boyfriend fucked you up and I am sorry for it, baby, I really am, but I’m not like him—”

“Jack, no,” you stopped him and removed your hands from your face, not caring if you looked ugly or destroyed. “Just leave. It’s better this way.”

“Leave? Are you insane?” He raised his voice. “No, I’m not leaving. I’m telling you that I am in lo—”

“Don’t you fucking dare, Hughes,” you got up, walking until you were toe to toe with him, looking up until your eyes met his. “I don’t want to hear it. Leave, please.”

“What the hell, man, you’re— you’re not even hearing me out!” He sounded desperate.

“I don’t want— I don’t need any more of your lies or pity. Sorry if you lost a good fuck, but I’m sure you’ll find someone else to get your dick wet.” It hurt you saying this but you needed to hurt him in order to make him leave, even if only God knew how much you wanted him to stay.

But the people you loved, the men you loved, never stayed.

Eventually, if you both started dating, he’d get tired of the routine and he’d find someone else. He’d start lying and cheating and apologizing just to do it all again, stepping on your heart like he did to the ice.

So you needed him to leave.

“So you think that you were just that to me?” He scoffed. “A good fuck? I took you to my parents’ house. I introduced you to them. I talked to my friends about you and I made time for something else besides Hockey. I wanted you in my life and now you’re telling me that it was all just sex to me?”

His eyes have never looked bluer. Your entire body felt cold, and you knew it wasn’t because of the weather. It was because you could feel Jack distancing himself from you, and it hurt.

“Leave, Hughes.”

He stared at you for a full minute, the room quiet. Then, he nodded once and twice, before stepping back and making his way to your door.

Opening it, he turned back and looked at you again. “I hope you know that you can’t keep your heart locked away forever, Soph.”

Wanting nothing but to be in his arms, you stared at him until he softly closed the door. You don’t know how much time you spent looking at the wooden entrance, feeling like you just watched your forever walk away.

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

Chapter 23: Extreme Makeover Backyard Edition

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV, Soldier Boy POV

Summary: When the reader left Payback 40 years ago after a falling out with her childhood best friend she never looked back, but when two men show up to her apartment and start asking her questions about the past, the reader begins to think those things can’t stay hidden and starts to question what’s real and what’s fantasy.  This is a re-telling of The Boys Season 3, where the reader is a supe who's known Soldier Boy since 1927. The chapters will fluctuate between past and present. This is chapter twenty three of my "You Call It Madness But I Call It Love" series. (I'm so bad at summaries please forgive me!)

Word Count: 9.1K

Warnings: I'm going to label this one 18+ because it handles some heavy subjects!  Angst, Cursing, Nudity, Mentions of Abuse (sort of- it's more the reader being used without knowledge of it and I'm not sure what to call that), Numbness, Depression, Mental Health, Brief mentions of graphic death, Brief mentions of graphic torture, Mention of gore, Mention of death, Mentions of character going through some HEAVY EMOTIONS and INTERNAL TRAUMA, Fluff, Sexual References, Family Problems. Soldier Boy might be, is, really, absolutely, completely a little OOC. Soldier Boy is really all you need as a warning.

Note: This is told from the Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. Reader is described as "curvy" occasionally. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal Monologue is in first person and is in italics

Series Masterlist

Masterlist

Reader POV

You fall on your hands and knees in the soft grass of Legend's front yard, falling from the sky like a comet as it's glow fades and burns for the last time before striking the earth. You don't remember how you left Stan's apartment, don't remember flying here, don't feel anything, not the humidity that comes with the rising sun, not the cold kiss of dew against your skin, all you feel is the cold creeping numbness that trickles through your veins.

The memories of what you did come in flashes, but they do nothing. They do not evoke remorse nor pain, they haunt you, but do not bring tears to your eyes.

You open and close your hands, letting the blades of grass crush beneath your fingertips, but you don’t completely comprehend where you are, or how the hell you got here. All you feel is weakness tugging at your every muscle, threatening to drag you under the rising tide. You felt electrified, but so tied at the same time, everything and nothing. What happened seemed centuries ago and also seconds ago.

There was no anger, no remorse, no pain, no horror, no shock, there was nothing, only the chill that clung to your skin on the warm summer morning. You could see Stan’s death in your mind, watch his body collapse in on itself under your power and yet it did nothing to you.

You're not sure of anything anymore. Who you are, who Rosemary is- everything you knew is gone and you're not sure what's left behind, not sure what will come crawling out of the shell you were now. You knew you should be afraid, but another voice in your ear whispered so should they.

Someone grabs you by the shoulders, hauls you up off the ground, raising your gaze from the wet grass.

Ben looks furious, mind you, he always seemed to be angry when it came to you. You wondered if that was because he loved you or if it was because the two of you were fated to kill each other one day.

Or maybe it's a healthy combination of both.

He's wearing his jeans again, his dark hair falling forward into his eyes that burn with the force of his rage, but as soon as he sees the dried blood coating your cheeks, hair, and body, you watch worry begin to spark behind his glowing green eyes.

You register that deep down his anger and worry comes from a place that he'd hidden from you for eighty years, his love for you, the love that he was no longer hiding. But the chill still rose in your chest like the first frost of winter.

"Fuck." Ben mutters, moving his hands along your body, boldly looking for injuries, but he doesn't find any. "What the fuck happened? Why did you leave?"

You don't answer him, instead you take in a shallow breath, filled with the smell of fresh cut grass and Ben's musk. You're trying to find your voice, but it's difficult for you.

"Y/n are you alright?" He asks it, firmly gripping you by the shoulders, trying to shake you back into reality. You can hear the way the anger in his voice has shifted to something else.

"It's not mine Ben." Your voice is no more than a whisper as you stare blankly at him.

"Whose is it?"

You can't answer him, the only thing in your mind is Stan's words to you, the secrets he kept for forty years coming to light, the terrible things that he and Vogelbaum did. You want to tell him, tell him about what you know, but you can't find the words, can't find the thoughts to follow them.

"Sweetheart?" Ben furrows his eyebrows together, tilting your face to look at him. His hand softly strokes against your cheeks not understanding why you’re acting like this. “Are you alright?” 

His voices sound like you’re underwater, a murmur, a buzz, just a shadow of the deep rumble you love so much, the voice you thought you'd never hear every again.

Ben says your name again, with such urgency that it snaps you out of it for only a moment. The smoke clears, but what’s left barely has the strength to cling to him as you collapse into his chest. Your body shakes uncontrollably, tears soaking through his thin t-shirt, unable to do anything else, but clutch him tighter against you.

"He's our son Ben. They stole my-" You can't find the words, can't find your voice, it sounds hollow. "Stan he and Vogel-." But your voice breaks again and you shudder against Ben's chest, the numbness coming back to drag you under.

Ben doesn't hesitate, he picks you up as if you weigh nothing, tucking your head under his chin as he goes and turns back towards the house. You barely register his picking you up, can’t seem to focus on anything, breath coming in shallow gasps, body still shaking. Ben tightens his arms around you as if trying to comfort you as he walks through the front doors.

“Is she alright?” Rosemary’s voice is close, but you don't raise your head from Ben's body.

“Fuck, there’s so much blood.“ Hughie adds and you can imagine him standing beside her, his eyes wide.

Guess that means he survived Mindstorm.

Your only hope was that Lou was already in bed, that she wasn't watching Ben carry you soaked in blood through Legend's house.

“It’s not hers.” Ben replies gruffly, still moving towards the staircase. He wasn't stopping and you were thankful for that, you didn’t want to talk to anyone and didn’t want to have it out with Rosemary. You were so tired, tired of fighting and of trying. You didn’t want to yell at her, didn’t want her to yell at you, all you wanted was to slip deeper into the darkness.

"Shit, she's just as fucking unhinged as Soldier Boy is." Butcher mutters under his breath wherever it is he's standing.

“Wait mom talk to me-“ Rosemary tries again.

“No.” You murmur into Ben’s neck. Stan’s revelation rings in your ears once more, betrayal momentarily clawing its way from the pit before the cold feeling comes back to drag you under.

Because it felt like she had betrayed you. All these years you thought that Vought left the two of you alone, but no, it was a lie. And if she'd done that, what else had she done to ensure your freedom?

“Please-“ She sounds broken, and it strikes something inside, because she's never sounded like that before. Rosemary was strong, stronger than you ever were.

But then the word makes the memory of Stan’s body snapping and twisting beneath your control come roaring back, his pleas for the mercy he didn’t deserve exhaled on his dying breath, as you turned him into nothing more than a lump of flesh.

You gasp, another shudder shaking through your body and you don’t answer and don't raise your head.

"Wait Ben-" She says his name, but Ben doesn't stop.

"She doesn't want to talk right now." Ben's tone is controlled, but you can hear the trickle of his rage just on the edge of his inflection. "And I'm not going to make her." He continues walking down the stairs and Rosemary does not follow.

Ben doesn’t put you down on the bed, instead he takes you to the adjoining bathroom. It’s bigger than your bedroom back at your apartment with a walk in shower big enough for five people to stand in, a giant vanity with two sinks, a jacuzzi, and a bathtub big enough for three. Legend never spared any expense when it came to that sort of thing.

Ben slowly places you on the vanity but when he pulls back you grab the front of his shirt. “No.” You breathe suddenly terrified. The terror of Ben leaving cuts through it all, followed by a wave of horror and fear.

If he leaves they’ll come for me again. They’ll come take me or Lou.

You were afraid to be alone, didn’t want him to go, not after everything that happened.

“Shhh.” Ben soothes you, brushing your hair back, “It’s alright sweetheart I’m just getting a washcloth.”

You relent, hand unfurling from his shirt, and he comes back with it, wetting it with warm water before he begins to drag it over your face as gently as possible. His eyebrows are furrowed with concentration, but you don’t move, you only stare at a point over his left shoulder not really comprehending what’s happening.

What happened to Stan comes back in flashes, black and white photographs followed by the bits of conversation that unmade you, the revelations that would haunt you for the rest of your life.

Ben sighs. “Well. I don’t think this is helping at all.” He throws the washcloth into the sink and gently cups your chin, turning your gaze on him.

You blink a few times to focus your eyes.

“Look sweetheart I know you don’t want me to leave, but you gotta get in the shower. I can’t get it all with this washcloth and the last thing I want is to put you in bed covered in blood.” He searches your gaze trying to make you understand what he was asking but you don’t respond.

He leans his forehead against yours. “Honey please you gotta say something. You’re scaring me.” Ben’s eyes meet yours, wide and for the first time in years you see genuine fear.

You let out a shallow breath, but don’t say anything. You can’t find your voice. Instead you gently touch his chest just over his heart. It’s a small gesture, but it’s enough for Ben.

Ben closes his eyes for a minute as if trying to make sense of it all. “Okay.” He breathes, opening his eyes again to look at you, care and concern charging the air between the two of you. “Can I take off your clothes?”

You nod once, eyes still focused on the white tiled wall behind him.

“Okay.” Ben gently pushes the leather jacket back from your body. It falls back on the counter in a bloody heap, staining the white countertops with flecks of dried reddish-black blood. “I need you to stand up for me sweetheart.” Ben says, holding you firmly by the waist and pulling you off the counter.

You stand there for a moment, unsteady on your feet, staring blankly ahead of you.

“Arms up.” Ben whispers.

You raise them above you head and Ben removes your shirt and bra before moving to your pants. “Hold on to me.” He places your arms around his shoulders as you step out of your shoes, pants, and panties.

If you’d been in your right mind maybe you would have worried about this moment, worried about Ben seeing you naked again after all these years. He’d only ever seen you the one time, but somewhere deep down registered that this was different. It wasn’t sexual. There weren't any expectations and there was nothing to be embarrassed about. This was Ben keeping his promise and taking care of you the way that he always had.

He steps over to the bathtub, running his hand under the stream of water to check the temperature.

"Come on.” Ben gently leads you over, your small hand in his and helps you step over the side of the tub and into the warm water.

Steam rises around your body, but the water feels lukewarm. Your gaze levels at the water that streams from the spout on the edge of the tub, not looking up at Ben as he switches the water to the handheld shower head.

"Tilt your head back for me honey." Ben murmurs, touching your chin with your free hand to tilt it back. "Eyes closed."

You do as he says and feel the water trickle through your hair and down your back, followed by the gentle scrub of Ben beginning to work shampoo through the strands. He works quietly, catching the suds that threaten to fall into your eyes. Your hands are folded in your lap, eyes still closed, feeling the steady way he cleans your hair and then your face.

As you sit there the memory of everything that happened with Stan begins to trickle in, causing an uncontrollable shudder to shake through your body. Ben's ministrations were doing little to make the cold feeling dissipate, if anything you could feel it sinking into your bones.

"It's alright sweetheart, I'm almost done." Ben says, and you feel his thumb stroke against your cheek for a moment before he continues to wash your hair.

"Sit here for a second. I'm going to go get you some clean clothes."

You open your eyes and watch him go. The water in the tub is red now, the last remnants of Stan's blood scrubbed clean from your body.

The fire would destroy any evidence that you'd been there and washing the clothes that you killed him in should take care of any other problems.

When you're dried off and in your own clothes, you stand in the bathroom and catch a glance of yourself in the mirror. You look hollow, broken, eyes miles away, skin a little paler than normal. You don't look like yourself, but you also don't feel like yourself.

"Come on, let's get you to bed." Ben says and you feel him pick you up again, carrying you to the bed as if you weigh nothing.

You mechanically go through the motions of getting under the covers, pulling them up almost over your head as you curl in on yourself, making yourself as small as possible. You shut your eyes to try and make the images of what happened go away, but you can't fight the ebbing darkness that comes to welcome you home. It's familiar. The same one that you fell into when Ben broke your heart and you thought he died. The pit was opening beneath your feet once again, and you wondered if you'd be able to pull yourself out this time.

Ben changes into a pair of faded sweatpants, before he crawls into the bed behind you under the covers, putting his arm up over your waist to pull you into him. You turn in his arms so that you're chest to chest and can bury your face into his shirt, inhaling the familiar scent, trying to rid yourself of the images and of the things you learned a few hours ago.

"It's alright Sweetheart, I'm right here." You can feel the rumble of Ben's voice in the palms of your hands where they curl against his soft shirt. The weight of his arm over your waist is familiar as is the heat of his body, the warmth you expected to wipe away the cold feeling that crept along your spine drowning everything else out of your head.

It's quiet for a few moments. Ben's hand is gently trailing up and down your spine, but sleep is miles away for you.

"I'm trying real hard not to be mad at you Sweetheart, especially when you're like this but-" Ben sighs, rubbing his hand up and down your back. "You lied to me. What were you thinking going off alone and-" His tone has shifted into more of a growl, the one he gets when he's about to yell at you.

If he had yelled at you, you wouldn't have reacted, you were just so tired of everything, couldn't focus on anything.

Ben's body tenses. It was as If he was physically trying to hold himself back from being upset, but you couldn't answer him. It had seemed like a good idea when you went, seemed right, but now you weren't sure.

What you had learned changed you, and you weren't sure if you'd ever be able to go back to the way you were.

He's quiet for a minute, before finally he presses a kiss to your forehead, and you bury yourself further into his chest. "I love you." He murmurs. "I promise I'm not going to go anywhere."

But you barely hear him, the only thing you hear is the low buzz of fluorescent lights and Vogelbaum's voice telling his staff to keep you quiet.

Soldier Boy POV

He didn’t know what to do. In all the years he’d known you, Ben had never seen you like this. He’d seen you upset, angry, sad, but never this.

It had been three days since you came back covered in blood, three days of you laying in bed refusing to speak, curled up into his chest.

Ben had tried to get you to eat something, but when you wouldn’t do it by yourself he had to spoon feed it to you, as if you couldn’t remember how to eat.

It scared him.

Ben hadn’t ever felt fear like this before in his entire life, but now, seeing you so distant and cold, he was terrified. He worried that you’d never come back.

Mindstorm had told him the truth about Homelander and as angry as Ben was about that, he couldn’t understand how Homelander was also your son. He’d never heard you say anything about them taking something from you for genetic testing, never spoken about willingly giving up your genetic material.

So then how the fuck did they get it?

There was something sinister that danced on the edge of his mind, something that seemed too horrible to consider, something that meant that Ben had failed to protect you, had failed to keep the promise he made eighty years ago.

But deep down Ben wondered if it was true, because as much as he knew you hated killing people, this seemed different than you usual reaction.

He held you closer to him, curving his body around your back as you slept soundlessly. You were holding on to his hand while you did, fingers entwined with his, holding it against your chest while you found some peace.

Ben was honestly waiting for another nightmare. Each time you’d fallen asleep over the past three days you’d woken up gasping for air, shaking uncontrollably, with tears rolling down your cheeks. Ben did what he could, brought you into his lap and held you tight, reassuring you that it was okay, that it was only a dream.

He was trying not to be angry, but he was. He was furious when he got back to Legend’s two days ago and discovered that you were gone, that you’d left to go off and do God knows what with Homelander flying around. Rosemary refused to tell him where you were only told him that you left but that you’d be back. Ben hated that you made him wait around like a fucking woman waiting for her husband to come home.

He had intended on yelling at you, at making sure you knew how pissed off he was that you did the one thing he told you not to do, but then he saw you land in Legend’s front yard looking like you had taken a shower in someone’s blood and he couldn’t. Not when he feared that the blood was yours and not when he saw how broken you were.

Ben had loved you for a long time, understood you, saw how strong you were, saw that you always spoke your mind no matter what, and to see you like this was… petrifying. He didn’t know what had happened, didn’t understand how something you learned could effect you this much.

He too was still reeling from the revelation that Homelander was his son, felt an even greater sense of betrayal because Vought should have let him give the team to his son, pass it off like a king giving up his throne. And after the night that he had spent with you all those years ago, Ben was ready to give it up, to walk away and give you the life that you always wanted away from the spotlight.

Ben figured that Stan had told you Homelander was your son, and maybe that’s what this was. Ben had been dreading the conversation with you when he got back to Legends, the conversation in which he was going to have to tell you that Homelander was your son too. He didn’t want to hurt you all over again with news like that.

I guess I don’t have to.

Ben thinks to himself listening to the soft beat of your heart, pushing his face further into your hair where it hangs over your shoulders. But he's not sure that this is better.

When he wakes the bed is empty.

“Sweetheart?” Ben says looking around the bedroom. He strains his hearing to see if you’re in the bathroom or upstairs but he doesn’t hear you. Fear grips his heart.

Fuck. Where did she go?

Thunder shakes the house, rattling the windows as Ben looks around the room, brief flashes of lightning illuminates the vintage furniture, but you aren't sitting on anything. The sliding glass doors on the back wall of the bedroom are open, allowing rain to sweep through onto the carpets, water flooding towards your now cold side of the bed.

Shit.

Ben all but jumps out of the bed and rushes to the sliding glass doors, looking beyond into the darkness of Legend’s backyard. Lightning skates across the night flashing bright white, and catching where you stand in the grass. You’re looking up at the sky, soaked to the bone, but seemingly unnerved by the weather.

“Sweetheart?” Ben shouts over the sound of the thunder, but you don’t move. “Are you okay? Did you have another nightmare?”

“It’s not a nightmare.” You murmur into the storm, your eyes still focused on the sky, looking up at something that he can't see.

“What do you mean?” Ben gets closer to you, his feet sinking into the wet grass, rain saturating his clothes every second he stands out there with you. Ben was trying to understand, was trying his best to do what you needed, but he was worried that he was failing, that maybe he needed to take you to a hospital. He wasn't sure how to explain that to anyone if he did take you to one.

If anything he thought that you'd want to talk things out with Rosemary, but you hadn't wanted anything to do with her at all. That was the most surprising, that you didn't want to speak to her, didn't want her around. She had tried to come down to the bedroom, but you hadn't looked at her, you'd only clung tighter to Ben and said no. He wanted to know why, what Stan had told you to make you not want anything to do with her.

He was happy that Lou hadn't come down with her, he didn't want Lou to see you like this, didn't want it to haunt her the same way it was haunting him. He had heard Lou ask about you when he was laying in the basement beside you, and she had found him in the kitchen getting you something to eat and had hugged him tight and asked where you were. There were tears in her eyes when she did so and Ben told her that you weren't feeling well, but that he was taking care of you. There was a hand-drawn card on your bedside table from her filled with a picture of Lou holding out a bouquet of lavender to you that she asked him to give you.

“It really happened.” You close your eyes, head tilted up at the sky.

Lightning crackles across it, striking close to where you're standing, but you don't move an inch.

Ben stops mid-step. Your words sink into his soul, burn against his ribcage, anger surging up to replace the chill of the rain that clings to his skin. Because it meant he failed. It meant that the promise Ben made to you all those years ago was worthless, that he'd failed to protect you.

He thinks about all the time he wasted with other women, chasing after them, ignoring you. He thinks about all the moments he should have spent with you instead.

Maybe I would have figured it out if I wasn't so damn selfish. If I hadn't fucking cared about those stupid movies, or commercials, or the shitty interviews. I failed because I didn't put her first and I allowed this to happen.

“Stan told me.” You continue. "I wasn’t supposed to remember, but my mind knew. It was trying to tell me all these years but I just ignored it. Fucking pushed it away because I thought my mind was messed up from living this long. But it really happened."

“When?”

“I don’t know. All I know is that he said they did it when you were on location shooting a film. That they were too afraid to take me when you were still there.”  You're still not quite looking at him.

Ben felt the words like a punch to the gut. Why did I ever shoot any of those stupid films? Why didn't I take her with me? Why didn't I make up some stupid reason why I needed her there with me? Why didn't I tell her sooner how much she meant to me?

Ben remembered the first time you had the nightmare in front of him, he had just gotten back from shooting a film overseas, one that he could barely remember only that he literally had sand in every crevice of his body after each day of shooting. He remembered how happy he was to see you when you answered the door of your small apartment, how you smiled at him, but you seemed more tired than usual. Ben had missed you more than he knew, he had tried to call while he was away, but you hadn't picked up. He remember thinking that was odd. You always picked up the phone or at least always called him back, but you hadn't.

“They knew I’d say no. Knew that I wouldn’t want to raise a child under Vought’s watchful eye and instead of respecting that, they-" You stop mid sentence, your body has begun to glow bright purple, not just your eyes, there's a thin film of purple radiating out from your body, tracing your outline with a heavy hand, glowing brighter than the lightning that flashes across the sky. "Stan wasn't even ashamed. He was proud of what they made. Proud of what they did to our son."

As soon as you utter the word 'son', the ground begins to shake under Ben's feet, grass shreds in the air all around him, and the storm grows worse by the second. There's a terrible cracking sound and the trees on the edge of Legend's property snap, loosing their limbs to flashes of purple energy that wash away into the darkness with the force of your power.

Ben could feel the same power trying to push him back from you, push him inside the house, but he fought it, continuing to take more steps towards you.

“After all these years he wasn’t afraid of me. He was afraid that you would show up and make him pay.” Ben can see your body shake. “Everyone was always just afraid of you. All those years I worked so hard to make sure you didn’t kill anyone and for what? So they could take advantage of me?”

Your body begins to rise off the ground, glowing brighter and brighter. Until Ben almost has to look away, his body still being forced backwards. In all his years of watching you use your powers, he's never seen you do anything remotely like this. This didn't seem like just telekinesis and Ben wondered who else had killed you over the years, if it had happened before and you just hadn't cared to tell him, or if it had happened in the years he'd been away.

"Sweetheart please." Ben tries to say again, but it's swallowed up in the howling of the wind.

"All those years I gave Vought everything. I let them dress me, tell me what to say, inject me with that shit. I was everything they wanted me to be, and they used me just like I was a fucking doll for them to play with!" Ben can hear your teeth clenching together in rage, your powers spiking again so that now there is shredded earth, grass, and trees, whirling around the two of you swirling together in a vortex that flashes with purple energy. "But no more. They're all going to pay."

"Y/n-"

You were still rising off the ground getting further and further from Ben's reach and he was scared. He'd never seen you like this before, never seen you lose control or seen you this angry. Sure he pissed you off and you'd occasionally throw a couch around the room, but this was almost insane.

Fuck I should stop pissing her off.

Ben could feel his own rage surging in his chest when he understood exactly what Vought took away from you, when he understood exactly what Vogelbaum had done. But at the same time he was ashamed that he hadn't been there for you, that he hadn't been able to protect you from them, and that he hadn't known the first time you had that fucking nightmare and woke up screaming when he was in bed beside you.

"Sweetheart!" Ben finally shouts, grabbing your hand. As soon as his skin touches yours he feels like he's stuck his finger in an electrical socket,  as if the energy from your body jumping into his is almost painful, but he doesn't let go. He couldn't lose you to this, whatever the hell this was, wouldn't allow himself to lose you again.

Your glowing purple eyes flick to his. "Are you going to tell me that I shouldn't do that?" Your voice is cold. "That my revenge isn't as important as yours?"

"No." Ben shakes his head. "It's important. It's justified. I hate that they did that to you, that I wasn't there to stop them. That I didn't understand until now."

"It's not your fault what happened to me." You shout back, eyes flashing bright purple. "This isn't about you. This isn't your fight!" The vortex swirls faster around the two of you now, blurring everything beyond. "This is about what I need to do!"

"Yes it is!" His hand tightens in yours. "It is my fight if it involves you. I love you and that's what it means. It means us working together-"

"I don't need you to protect me! I am strong enough to do this on my own. I am so sick of people underestimating me and what I can do."

"Y/n please, listen to me!" Ben pleads. He could feel you slipping away and it scared him more than anything he'd been through in his entire life. He wasn't afraid to admit that. The look on your face and the display of power was so different than the person he knew.

You watch him silently, body glowing brightly in the night, floating off the ground as you stare down at him.

"I don't want you to do this alone." Ben says. The storm was still raging, thunder shaking the ground, lightning surging all around him. "I'm asking you to let me help you. Please."

"What?"

"You say that I hide what I'm really feeling, but you do too. You still hide things away from me. You think that you have to be perfect, controlled, some version of yourself that has everything together all the time, but you don't." Ben gently tries to pull you down an inch from the sky. "You've done that since we were kids, always done what you think is expected of you. That's why you almost married that asshole, because you were afraid to just let it go. So I'm asking you to do that now, to let go of all of it, because I promise that I will be right here for through every step of it."

"But-"

"I know I made promises when you chose me, and I'm sorry I let you down, I'm sorry that I let this happen, that I wasn't able to protect you from them." Ben's voice breaks and for a moment he sees a flash of the two of you in your bedroom the night that he asked you to come with him, how young and innocent you were, how much you cared for him reflected in your eyes. "So I'm promising you this now. That I will protect you, that I won't let anything happen to you and that you never have to be alone ever again. Because I love you. So please, just let go and let me in.

The whirlwind slows around the two of you, still ripping up the ground and the grass in the backyard.

"I have to be in control." You say in almost whisper.

"Why?" Ben asks.

"Because if I'm not I don't know what will happen!" You snap. "Someone dies, or you leave again, or they come to take Rosie or Lou away and I can't-" You shake your head, the glow on your body fading for a moment. "I'm not strong enough-"

"Sweetheart, you don't have to be." Ben says, and this time he pulls you from the air so that your bare feet swish in the grass again. His hand falls under your chin to raise your face to his. "That's why I'm here. You don't have to do this alone anymore, you don't have to carry this all on your shoulders. I am here and I am not going anywhere."

"But-"

"Please. I'm asking you to give me your pain, your anger, your burdens, your sorrows. Give me all of you. It's not going to scare me away." Ben whispers, taking your face between his hands. "I know that in the past I haven't been as dependable, but nothing is going to scare me away. I love all of you, even the pieces of yourself you keep from me, that you think you have to, to keep me here with you."

Fuck I sound like a pussy, but it's true. She's all I have and all I've ever wanted. And why shouldn't I say this to her? It's what she says to me. It's what she tells me and I believe her. I believe her when she says that I can rely on her, that I don't have to be strong all the time, that I can break.

He searches your face, brushes his thumbs across your rain soaked cheeks. I just want her to know that she can too and trust that I'll be here for her.

The vortex stops, the pieces of earth, trees, and grass falling to earth, the purple fading from your eyes as they do. You're no longer glowing, no longer a beacon in the night, you're just you, the woman that Ben loves more than life itself, and the woman that he thought he would never have ever again.

"I love you too." You whisper leaning into him, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck to lean your forehead against his.

He can feel the curves of your body against him, your wet clothes sticking like a second skin, hair stuck to your head, but you're just as beautiful as you always have been. And Ben understands that this time, he's not going anywhere, that he's going to stay with you for the rest of his life, and nothing can keep him away.

Reader POV

"Mindstorm told me." Ben says dragging his hand up your arm. You were laying on his chest in the bedroom, hair still wet, but now wearing dry clothes.

The residual thrum from your use of power was still charging through your cells, but lessened. Honestly you didn't remember going outside, didn’t remember standing in the storm, didn't know how long you were out there before Ben came out.

You were glad he did. You weren't in your right mind when you were out there, and if he hadn't come out you were sure that you were going to charge Vought yourself, tear it down and send it to hell where it belonged. You still wanted to, but you wanted Ben to do it with you. He was right, you didn't have to do it alone, and you didn't want to.

You nestled further into him, remembering what he shouted outside, remember how he held your face with the storm raging around him. He looked so afraid. You had only seen him look scared a handful of times in your life, but out there in the storm was different. It shocked you back into reality, brought you back from the pit, made you feel like you again for the first time in days.

And what he said hauled you further out of the darkness. You had said it to him countless times since he came back, that he didn't have to hide away what he was feeling from you, but for him to say it to you meant that he was listening. To you, Ben saying that made all of this more real, that he really wanted every part of you, that he loved you as much as he said.

The storm still raged outside, thunder occasionally shaking the windows, and lightning flashing behind the closed curtains, but you stayed curled up against Ben. Your head was tucked under his chin, arm wrapped over his bare chest. He hadn't put a shirt back on after the two of you changed, but you weren't complaining about that, there wasn't anything to complain about when it came to that. He was just so wonderfully warm, that you didn’t think you would get used to it. You also hoped that you didn't turn radioactive because of him, but you being here with him, laying on his warm chest made it worth it.

"Did he know about what Vogelbaum did?" You whisper.

Ben's muscles tense beneath your body when you ask that question. You knew that it hurt him, that it made him feel like he'd failed to protect you, but you didn't blame him for that. Even if he had been around, you knew that Vogelbaum would have figured out a way to do it, to get around him. And you didn't like it when Ben felt like he failed, it made you think about all the terrible things that his father used to yell at him when he was a kid. Ben had told you bits and pieces, over the years, and it was enough to make you want to travel back in time and kill his father yourself.

Honestly, you thought about killing him all the time when you weren't a supe as well.

"No. He didn't know that. All he knew was that Homelander was our son." When Ben says the word son he hesitates as if it's difficult for him.

It was also difficult for you, understanding that you had another kid and one that you didn't have anything to do with for forty years was hard. You suddenly understood how Ben felt about Rosemary.

"I should have known." You mutter into his chest.

"What do you mean?"

You sigh loudly. "At the premiere, Vogelbaum was pushing for me to come to the lab, said he was working on raising the "next generation of heroes" or whatever. And then Stan tried to come by and get me to do the same thing after you died, but I broke his nose."

"I remember." Ben mutters.

"What do you mean you remember?" You sit up to stare at him.

Ben raises an eyebrow. "I might have been there with Countess, but do you really think I wasn't listening to everything that was happening around you? He was dancing with you, I was making sure that everything was okay." Ben clears his throat awkwardly. "I mean I know that there was a lot happening that night, but I still wanted to make sure that you were okay."

"I wasn't."

"Yeah I-um- I know." His eyes flick away in shame.

"Ben?"

"Yeah?" He murmurs.

You gently turn his face back to look at you, fingertips under his chin. His green eyes are downcast, brows furrowed, lips pulled down into a frown. You knew how much he was still beating himself up for everything that happened in the past, and it was difficult for you to pretend that you didn't still feel the sting. But you knew he wasn't going to do it again, you believed that.

"It's okay. We're starting over. Just you and me." You brush your thumb over his bearded cheek. "No one else. This time what we're doing, it's different, it all feels different. Don't you think so? I mean I still love you just as much as I always have, but I-" You could feel yourself blush just a little, you weren't sure if Ben could feel that too.

"I know. It does." Ben whispers gazing at you. His fingers push back the strands of your hair that have fallen forward into your face. The way he's looking at you is the same way he did the morning you woke up on his chest after you slept together for the firs time. "I love you too Sweetheart." His lips find yours, gently pulling you up further on his chest so he can kiss you deeply, show you how much you mean to him, and you can’t help but smile into his mouth, feeling warm and happy for the first time in ages. His love dragging you out of the darkness that loomed over you and consumed your heart when Stan told you the truth about Homelander's heritage. 

You sit up, folding your legs beneath you, pulling Ben's right hand into your lap, gently tracing the lines with a finger tip, noting the rough callouses that he'd developed over the years. You weren't really sure what to say next.

Ben sits up so that he's leaning towards you. "Are you feeling better?"

"A little." You continue to trace the lines. His hands were so much bigger than yours, everything about Ben was big, but you liked his hands, mostly because how small yours were when you held his. "I think destroying Legend's backyard was just the right amount of therapy."

"That was a little much, but I'm glad you're feeling better. I was-" Ben swallows. "I was really worried about you."

"I know." You whisper. "It's never been that bad before. The last time I got close was-" You stop mid-sentence.

"Forty years ago?" Ben asks quietly.

You nod.

"I figured." Ben scoots closer towards you so that his thigh is brushing against yours. "I'm-"

"No." You squeeze his cheeks, eyes narrowing. "No more saying sorry. Not again."

"Okay." Ben's gaze is still apologetic. He waits for a minute, watching you in the silence. "What are we going to do about Homelander?"

"I don't know."

It was the truth, you had no idea what to do with your supposed son. You had seen the coldness in his eyes, heard about the horrible things that he was doing to other people, the horrible things he had threatened to do, and you'd seen the way he didn’t seem to care about human life.

Then again maybe I can't judge him, not after what I did to Stan. You think, your frown deepening. Stan deserved what I did to him and my only wish is that Vogelbaum somehow survived getting his head fucking blown off so I can make him pay.

"Do you think we should try to talk to him?" Ben asks.

"I don't think that's possible."

"Why not? He's our son, somewhere deep down he's got to be willing to do that." Ben's voice rumbles up through his chest. "Maybe they brainwashed him into the person we saw at Herogasm, maybe he's just being controlled and told what to do just like we were."

"I don't think that’s possible."

"Why not?" There's an urgency in his eyes that is unfamiliar to you, almost as if he's pleading for you to understand.

But why? Yes he's our son by blood but we don't know anything about him. We haven’t been in his life for forty years, we don't have any connections to him.

"You saw how he was at Herogasm. How he was almost happy to kill Butcher, how he was happy when he tried to kill you and me. I don't know what kind of person is okay with that. I mean you and I have killed people and we feel remorse after, or there's some kind of justification, but there was something in his eyes, it's almost not human. It's predatory, it's-" You shake your head trying to comprehend it. "I don't know what the fuck Vogelbaum did to him, but there's something inside Homelander that's not able to be saved."

"You don't know that."

"Ben, do you think that I want to believe that? To believe that our son is not a good person?" You drop his hand from your lap. "It's taking everything I am not to go to him, not to try and work this out. I keep trying to tell myself that maybe all he needs is family, but I don't know."

"My old man said that blood mattered. That it was the only thing that defined family-"

"Now you want to listen to your dad?" You sigh looking at Ben who is frowning at you. "We both know that he's not exactly the best role model."

"Well neither am I okay?" Ben snaps, his eyes flashing. "Maybe he just needed someone and there was no one there. I mean I wasn't there for Rosemary, but she had you and she turned out fine!"

"That's not your fault Ben. It's not your fault that you weren't there. You can't forget that they sent you to Russia to replace you with him."

"I'm not forgetting I'm just saying that they did the same fucking thing to me!"

Your next thought fizzes to a stop in your brain. What is he talking about?

"What are you talking about?" You try to reach for him, but he pulls back from your touch.

"They force fed him all that shit about what it was to be an American, they made him a supe, they brainwashed him with all my old fucking films." He spits. "But in the lab when we got the serum the first time, they did the same thing to me. They told me that I was going to be a god, that I was going to be the symbol that America needed to get through the war, that I was everything that would save America from destruction."

"Ben." You say again, this time taking his hands and he doesn't pull away. "Ben listen to me. You were older when you became a supe, we both were. You knew what reality was, you knew what the world was like when the scientists started spouting all their crap. You were old enough to understand. Homelander was raised in a lab, he didn't have a family, he didn't have friends. He was told that he was a god every day and he's not. He was raised to believe that he was something more than human, something unbeatable."

"But-"

"They told me that too." You push his hair back out of his eyes, trailing your fingers against his forehead. "That I was a god, that everyone would want me, would look at me and understand that I was beyond human. And at the beginning maybe I believed it for a few years, but that doesn't make him anything like you or like me. He's twisted, his mind is gone, any semblance of humanity he had has been warped away into something dark. He never had any light to begin with."

"You don't know that."

"I do. I can see it in his eyes. I saw it when I fought him at the Herogasm. There's nothing left to save. He's done terrible things."

"I have too." Ben mutters.

"No. You lost control, we all do. It's unrealistic to think that it won't happen, especially not for people like us who have lived this long, but him? He did those things of his own volition, because he believed that he should or maybe it was because he believed that no one could stop him." You cup his cheek, pulling his face forward into the space between the two of you. "The things you've done you feel remorse for. I was there for you every time you messed up. I saw what it did to you, saw how broken you were when you hurt someone."

"Because I'm a hero." Ben sighs. 

"Messing up once or twice does not make you less of a hero Ben, it makes you human." You lean your forehead against his, cupping his cheeks with your palms, feeling the way his beard tickles against your skin. "But Homelander, I don't think that there's anything human left."

Ben's hand comes up to hold on to your left wrist. "Then what do we do?"

"I don't know." You sigh. "I wish I did. If you really want to try to talk to him, we can, but I don't think that it's a good idea."

"He's still our son."

"He's our blood, but I don't think that makes him our son." You murmur.

You really didn't know how to deal with any of this. You wanted to believe that there was some semblance of humanity left in Homelander, but you didn't think that there was. You hated that Ben believed that he was like his son. Maybe that was some weird misogynist thing and Ben kept thinking like father like son in his head, but there wasn't any way that Homelander could be anything like Ben. Ben wasn't around for him, wasn't in his life, but maybe.

Ben pulls you back down on his chest once more, and you nestle into him once more, your head directly over his heart, the warmth of his skin comforting against your cheek.

"I think Noir knew." You breathe, tracing your hand over Ben's right pec.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Stan kinda hinted that he did, said that Noir was obsessed with me after I saved his life-"

"When did you save his- oh." Ben sighs.

"I think I should have seen that coming, given how much he kept showing up to my sparring sessions, the interviews, even some of the commercial shoots I had he seemed to always be around." You frown with a sigh. "I can't believe that I didn't know he was stalking me."

"What?"

"Stan said he kept breaking in to my apartment when I wasn't there, that he stole my necklace, you know? The one my dad got me for my birthday-"

Ben sits back so he can look you in the eye. "You're shitting me right?"

"No. That's what Stan said." You shrug. "Might have been just Stan trying to take some of the heat off, but that's what he said."

"That piece of shit." Ben almost growls. You can see the flash of jealousy and possession in his eyes that makes your heart thud a little faster in your chest. He clears his throat. "You-um- you never liked him right?"

"What?"

"The two of you were never that close?"

"Why are you asking me that?"

"Well you did save his life."

"Ben I've saved plenty of people from your temper. But no, I never liked him that way. Irving was sweet, but he was always so eager to prove himself to Stan it was just sad."

"Good."

"Why?" You sit up further, smirking at him. "Does that make you jealous? For you to think that Noir and I were together?"

Ben's eyes darken. "Watch it Sweetheart."

"Watch what?" You bat your eyes innocently. "I'm just asking a simple question."

"You keep poking the bear and you're not gonna like what happens."

"Poking the bear?" You snort sitting up and poke him in the ribs. "Are you the bear in that scenario?" You poke him again with a wicked smirk.

"Yes."

"Hmm. Well I think you're all talk. Because I have definitely poked you several-"

You're on your back in a second with Ben hovering over you, his green eyes shining as he flashes a roughish grin at you. One of his hands is pressed into the pillow next to your head, the other is at your waist, slipping beneath your t-shirt to rub circles over your hip bone with his thumb. "You were saying?" His voice is the low rumble that makes it hard for you to think.

You clear your throat. "I was saying that," You thread your hands behind the back of his head, working your fingers into his hair. "You have nothing to be jealous about."

"Really?"

"Mhhmm." You smile sheepishly. "Because it's always been you. No one else. Not Howard, Not Noir, just you." His hair is soft between your fingertips, his gaze unbreakable.

Ben returns your smile and collapses on top of you. You gasp out a breath, in a loud 'oof' sound as he does. His arms go around your waist and he buries his head in your chest breathing deeply. "I like it when you say that." He murmurs, turning his head so he can look up at you from your chest, with a smile that catches you in your heart.

"I know." You continue to scratch your fingertips through his hair.

"Sweetheart?"

"Yeah?" You breathe as you close your eyes, comforted by the weight of his body on top of yours. It was familiar, almost like he was a weighted blanket that took all your anxiety away. You felt safe with his arms wrapped around your waist, as if no one could touch you. You needed that now, needed that after you learned that without Ben someone had taken you from your home.

"I know that I can't say that there hasn't been anyone else." He whispers. "But you're the only one who mattered. You're the only woman that I've ever loved, and I swear that as long as I live I'll never love anyone else. You are all I've ever wanted and everything I thought I'd never have."

"You have me Ben." You whisper, beginning to fall asleep. "You always have, you always will."

And with those words you drift into the first fulfilling sleep you'd had in days, wrapped in the warm cocoon of Ben's love, allowing it to send you under into oblivion.

A/N: I know this one was mostly fluff and talking, but I thought that the reader deserved that after everything with Stan, and also after she well -you know- made a tornado in Legend's backyard. We're going to pretend that no one else heard it. 😂

As always thank you so much for reading! If you'd like to be added to my taglist please let me know :)

And if you'd like to read something a little more bantery then try my series: Take A Chance On Me

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[slayfics]

Explosive Tendencies a slow burn fan fiction about the readers developing relationship with Katsuki Bakugo.

Chapter Twenty: Planning for the School Festival.

Chapter links

After Mina dragged you out of Katsuki's room and forced you into what she called "girl's study night" a screaming match ensued between you and her.

She insisted you explain why you went "crawling back" to Katsuki when he didn't even apologize.

You kept telling her that's not how things happened, but she wasn't satisfied. To be fair you weren't giving her the whole story. But- how could you?

Katsuki had come to you confidently to vent about the guilt he had been carrying around due to All Might losing his power. Katsuki assumed it was all his fault for getting kidnapped and had been carrying that weight around all this time.

You weren't about to break his trust and out his vulnerability to all the girls in the class.

Why couldn't Mina just trust you had a good reason to be friends with him again?

"Listen, I get you have a big crush on him but- that doesn't make it ok for you to let him treat you like garbage!" Mina yelled. You felt your face become hot as the rest of the girl's mouths had dropped open. What happened to Mina waiting for you to be ready to say that? This fight was really all it took for her to expose you in front of the rest of the girls? You felt your hands begin to shake with anger.

"I don't know why you're so invested in this Ashido! Is it because you're jealous?! You're the one who's been obsessed with who likes who and going around saying you want to fall in love someday! Why do you even care what I do? It doesn't concern you!" You yelled

Mina stood stunned by your words for a moment before defeatedly exclaiming, "You're right- it doesn't concern me," and walking away.

You two hadn't talked since.

She kept her distance from you in classes and training, and in the common room you could feel her staring daggers at you any time you were near Katsuki.

You tried to brush it off and stay focused on your work, but it became increasingly annoying to feel her negative energy around you every day.

The next day in class Aizawa announced that the School Festival would be occurring as it does every year, and your class needed to choose an event to put on.

The class erupted with ideas and arguments about ideas that never reached a conclusion. Aizawa had told your class that if you didn't have an idea by morning you would be going with his idea of a public lecture.

After class, almost everyone hung around in the common room to discuss ideas. Katsuki walked past everyone discussing and said he was going to sleep.

You looked around and made eye contact with Mina who was giving you a nasty glare. You let out a sigh and followed after Katsuki.

"Tch- following me?" he asked as you stepped into the elevator with him.

"I'm not trying to stay down here with Ashido giving me side eye all night. Besides you heard them in class. They didn't care for our ideas anyway," You responded as Katsuki pressed the elevator button to the fourth floor.

Katsuki grunted in agreement. "Whatever they choose is going to be lame as hell anyway, and I don't give a fuck. I've got enough to deal with from the supplement classes for the provisional license," he said as you both made your way into his dorm.

He sat on his bed, and you sat on his rolling chair.

"How have those been anyway?" You asked, trying to keep the worry out of your voice. You knew it had to be a lot, juggling those classes on top of everything else in the hero courses at U.A. 

"I'm fine- you don't need to ask," Katsuki said then looked away from you glaring at the floor as he contemplated. " You and Raccoon Eyes still haven't talked since that day?" he asked.

Katsuki wasn't dumb, he knew Mina was upset at you because from her perspective it looked like he had ignored you for three days then seemingly came back with no explanation. He knew you didn't tell Mina the truth- how he had cried like a damn baby to you that night shortly after his fight with Deku. He was grateful you didn't- but also felt guilty for putting a wedge in your friendship with Mina.

"No," you answered. "But I don't give a damn, she's just an extra anyway, right?" You teased.

Katsuki let out an amused huff. He knew you were lying. Of course, you cared. He noticed Mina was the only other person in the class you had gotten close to besides him and Eijiro.

"Yeah," he said still staring at the floor. If he could have, he would have thanked you for keeping his privacy and he would have apologized for rupturing your friendship, but... he just couldn't. So instead- "You want to get working on one of the dumb assignments we have due soon?"

"Yeah," You smiled at him excited for the invitation to work with him.

Katsuki glanced at your smile before making his way to grab his study materials. You were always so happy to be around him even when he knew he had to be a miserable company. It didn't make sense to him- but... he didn't hate it.

You two worked on your assignment until Katsuki declared it was getting too late. You looked at your phone and rolled your eyes.

"Still on grandpa time, huh?" you teased.

"Hey! I have a good sleep schedule and I need it with all this extra work alright!" He barked.

"I know I know- I'm just messing with you," you said and began to pack up your study supplies.

Katsuki eyed you putting your stuff away for a moment and then laid down on his bed stretching out.

You swung your backpack on your back, "Get some rest then Grandpa," you said playfully at him.

"Hm?" He said eyeing you. "You- don't have to leave," he said.

You froze and stared at him, returning his gaze. He was asking you to stay?

You dropped your backpack and sat back down on his rolling chair eyeing him curiously.

"You comfortable over there?" He asked.

"Uh-," You mumbled unsure of how to answer. You were unsure what he was trying to get at?

"You fell asleep over here before brat- you can make yourself more comfortable," he said in response to your quizzical look.

You felt your breath catch in your throat. Was he asking you to join him on the bed?

You moved slowly as you sat on the bed awkwardly.

Katsuki scoffed, "So- what stupid event do you think those extras are going to choose?"

"No idea- but if they choose Kaminari's maid cafe, I will be murdering someone," You responded laughing.

"Hm- too bad you wouldn't look bad in a maid outfit," Katsuki said laughing.

A bright blush illuminated your face.

"Oh shit- relax I'm just kidding, no need to turn into a damn tomato," he said laughing again.

You tried to brush off your reaction and turned away to hide your face. "Hey- you sure you want me in here much longer?" You asked.

"The hell do you mean? Would have told you to get the fuck out if I didn't," Katsuki said.

"It's just- I don't know- I'm sure you heard."

"Heard what?" He asked.

"Some of those rumors that spread around when Ashido pulled that stunt and dragged me out of your room when I tried to hide from her in the restroom," You explained After that night when the boys had seen your fight with Ashido, someone had run with some assumptions of why you were hiding in Katsuki's room.

"Oh," Katsuki exclaimed now understanding. "Look you can go if you want. Those extras are nosy as hell and need to mind their damn business. But- I don't give a damn about what any of them have to say so-," Katsuki said.

He was never good at words, so he couldn't just simply say he liked your company and didn't want you to leave. Especially now that you brought up those rumors he heard. He didn't want to feel like he was forcing you to stay.

"Just go if you're uncomfortable," He concluded.

"No! I- I don't care either... I just- whatever it doesn't matter," you said deciding to leave the conversation alone.

To Katsuki's surprise, you laid down next to him, "Ok- so who had the worst idea of an event?" You asked.

Katsuki let out an amused laugh, "Iida, who the fuck would come to a history lesson?!"

You laughed at his response, and the two of you talked until you had both dosed off into sleep.

Tags: @anon-mouse223 @unofficialmuilover @maddietries @sikuthealien @queenpiranhadon @melrs21 @poemzcheng @kazuumii @bakunianadecorazon @ur-crusty-uncle @reads-stuff-quietly @chixkadee @perfectsukii @faetoraa @fem-weeb @nagicats @lees-chaotic-brain @maelibo

Just wanted to thank you all for reading and update you that there are 4 more chapters left!

[thornsnvultures]

bucky barnes x plus size!fem!reader

cw: smut (18+ minors dni), thigh riding, breast play, fluff, <1k words

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"Honey, I'm home!"

You don't turn from your book, too determined to finish the page you're on before Bucky bogarts your free time. You swear sometimes he's more needy than his precious cat, but really you can't complain.

His keys land in the bowl by the front door as he toes off his heavy boots. You have about five seconds from when they hit the ground to wrap things up before you get a lap full of boyfriend.

"Whatcha readin'?"

You finish just in time, reading the last line of the chapter and shutting the book, flinging your arms open so Bucky can dramatically settle his weight on top of where you're laying on the couch. He always acts like he hasn't seen you in years even if it's only been a day or two, but you wouldn't want to stop being the person he clings to for anything.

"Buck," you laugh, slapping his shoulder as he nuzzles into your neck. "It's too hot, you gotta get up!"

He's blocking the fan you had oscillating next to you while you read and between his body heat and the lack of air flow it feels like the room temperature went up about twenty degrees.

Bucky peels himself off of you, hovering over you with his forearms and biceps bulging. Yeah, it's definitely hotter now that he's here.

Your thighs squeeze together as he takes in your "it's too ungodly hot today" outfit of a tank top and barely-there panties. It's not fair how good he looks, his shaggy hair falling in his face, a light sheen of sweat making him glow. Unlike you, glued to the sofa as you are, feeling sticky from the heat. And he's wearing jeans! It's a crime.

"The a/c still not working, beautiful?" Bucky takes your book and places it on the floor. His knee nudges is way into the space between your legs and you forget what he just asked you. His lips feel too good on your neck, why would anything else matter?

"Y'know you should just move in with me. I've got that fancy central air, keeps the whole apartment cool."

Bucky smiles against your sweat slick skin when you laugh again. Sometimes you forget he's from a different time until he says stuff like that, like it's this new fangled invention that'll rock my socks off.

"You're right," you gasp, his thigh grinding into your core. Your breath stutters when he licks a stripe up from between your breasts where your tank top has ridden down.

"Of course I'm right," Bucky captures your parted, gasping lips in a kiss. Your eyes flutter shut and you melt even further into him, letting your hips grind against his denim clad thigh.

"Please," you whine. It's too hot. The air, his body enveloping yours, your molten core soaking a wet spot into his jeans. All of it. It's too much.

Bucky grips your hip with one hand, digging into the cushion of your flesh so he can help you move faster, harder. You can feel his cock, hard and heavy, pressing against the bulging zipper at the front of his jeans. It digs into the space where your hip and mound meet, thrusting against you in a teasing approximation of what it feels like when he's inside you. Fucking hell, you need him inside you. But right now you need to come, you're so, so close. Your panties are pulled tight between your pussy lips, soaked and dragging against your puffy clit.

"Please, Bucky, pl-aah!"

You cry out, gripping Bucky's biceps to the point of pain as your body seizes.

"That's it. That's it, beautiful. Make a fuckin' mess for me. Come all over me, baby. That's it." Bucky doesn't let you go, his hand on your hip, working you through your orgasm as you slow and twitch under him.

He presses kisses down your cheek, your jaw, down to your breast where he sucks a sensitive, peaked nipple through your thin top. You whine and shudder again, his dick twitching against your thigh. He doesn't seem in a rush to take care of his situation, fully engrossed in circling your nipples with his tongue just to watch your squirm.

"Bucky, what--it's too hot," you whine, trying to push him off now that you're even more sweaty than before.

"Move in with me then," he tosses out before returning to your breasts, happily nibbling and sucking marks into your skin.

You run your fingers through his hair, tugging when he bites a little to hard. Not that you'd want him to stop, he knows your limits.

"I don't know, Bucky." Would you love this kind of treatment every day, all day? Hell yes. Is the idea of taking the next step with this man whose life is constantly on the line, whom you may or may not...love absolutely terrifying? Uh, duh.

"Think about it," Bucky stops his errant tongue for a moment to press a kiss to your forehead. He cradles your face in his big hand and it's so hard to not melt like ice cream. It's a lot, sharing a space with someone, being alone in his home while he's away. It would be your home too, hopefully. Would he let your bring all your plants? Would Alpine eat your plants?

"I'll think about it. I promise," you whisper as you turn your head in his hand to kiss his metal palm. It's surprisingly cool to the touch. "Is not fair you made me come like that before you asked me."

Bucky chuckles and kisses your forehead again before sliding down your body. He gives your thick thighs a squeeze and kisses your mound. Your pussy flutters, clenching and begging for his touch. Bucky inhales deep and smiles at you from between your thighs.

"Oh I'm not done convincing you yet, beautiful. I got a key in my pocket with your name on it."

---

--

-

🖤

[fushigurioo]

look after you - megumi fushiguro

Chapter 1 - Those eyes

cw: sexually suggestive (all characters aged up), breaking up, angst, crying, illness

WC: 2.4k

Return to masterlist

  -8 months ago-

  It happened very naturally, and rather fast, your relationship with Megumi Fushiguro. 

Your dorm rooms were almost next door to each other, separated only by Yuji Itadori in the middle, and you both found yourselves paying each other impromptu visits late at night when one of you couldn’t sleep. And each visit became ever so slightly more intimate than the last. Developing from a 10 minute chat across the room, to watching a movie together, to eventually sharing a bed together. Falling asleep on your respective sides and waking up spread out over each other, legs tangled together. 

You’d been friends for years prior, having both attended Jujutsu Tech together as students from 15, and now working here as fully fledged sorcerers in your early twenties. 

That one fateful night, you were sick. You had been hit with a terrible cold and you were simply miserable, tossing and turning but not being able to sleep because you couldn’t breathe out of your nose. 

“Goddammit, fuck.” Is what you muttered to yourself as you finally lost your own internal conflict. You were trying to stay clear of Megumi’s dorm, not only because you didn’t want him to catch your cold, but also because of the lingering feelings you had developed for him. I mean, it had only been one night, but damn you were trying to stay away. Each visit had the tension rapidly rising between you both. Something was bound to snap eventually.

You dragged yourself out of your bed, slipping on a pair of fuzzy socks and wrapping a fluffy blanket around yourself. Your hand hesitated slightly on your doorknob, but the longing to have your best friend next to you was a lot stronger than the warnings that your brain was screaming at you. Too late to go back now.

You inhale deeply (or, try to through your stuffy nose) and sigh aloud, before tapping on his door gently with the back of your fist. You grin to yourself as you hear his bed creak, before his quick footfalls toward the door. Simp.

“Y/n, where have you be - uhh…” Megumi stumbles over his own sentence, looking you up and down and furrowing his brows in confusion. “What’s with you? Why are you dressed like that?”

You look down at your chosen attire underneath the blanket that was draped around your shoulders. Lifting your head again to meet his questioning gaze, you raise a brow and open your blanket further, giving him a better view of what’s underneath. 

“What’s with you, Fushiguro? You never seen a girl in a Charmander onesie before? Are you gonna let me in or what, can’t you see I’m dying?” You question, clasping your hands together and raising them under your chin, looking up at him with your best puppy-dog eyes. 

Megumi tries his very best to ignore his increasing heart rate as he sighs, standing aside to let you in whilst rubbing the back of his neck with his right hand. “Just get in here, dumbass.” He watches as you wander in, making your way over to his bed as though it was second nature to you. “And no, I’ve never seen a girl in a Charmander onesie before. Pikachu socks too? Gone all out for me, huh?” He teases, following you and flopping back down onto his bed beside you, resting his head on his hand and propping it up with his elbow, studying you intently. 

“Mmm, shut up, Megs.” You sigh, curling up contentedly, turning your back to him. “Sorry. Couldn’t tell if I can’t sleep because I can’t breathe properly, or if I’m codependent on you now… Hope you don’t mind.” You laugh nervously, trying to subtly initiate a conversation about just whatever the hell is going on with the two of you. Normal friends don’t do this. Right?

“Well…” Megumi starts, edging ever so slightly closer to you, “I’m not sick. And I couldn’t sleep either. Does that make me codependent?”

You tense as you feel a single index finger running from your shoulder, down your arm and back up again. Is he feeling the fluffy goodness of your Pokemon pyjamas?? Is he showing you physical affection? 

“Depends..” You start, deciding to take a leap of faith and one hell of a risk. “Would you miss me if I wasn’t here to share my disease with you?”

Megumi hums, raising even higher on his propped up elbow trying to catch the faintest glimpse of what your current expression is in the darkness of his dorm room. His heart is POUNDING in his chest, are you fucking with him? 

“Maybe… not your disease,” Megumi starts, slowly, trying not to let his speech tremble with nervousness. “But you? I guess so. And this?” He runs his hand down your arm again, lifting your wrist by your onesie and flopping your hand around like a puppet. “I suppose. I never thought Charmander could look so…”

“Pick your words wisely, Fushiguro!” You warn him teasingly. 

“Shh. Let me finish.” He retorts, snaking his arm over your shoulder and gently placing his hand over your mouth. “As I was saying,” he moves his hand upwards on your face, giving your cheeks a sweet little squeeze. “I never thought Charmander could look so.. pretty.” 

Your brain short circuits and your breath hitches in your throat. Pretty? You did NOT expect to hear that coming from Megumi’s mouth. Especially not this suddenly. 

You freeze, trying to gain composure, starting to splutter your words. “I… you think I- me?” 

“Mmmhm.” He cuts you off, snaking his arm around your middle and pulling you into him. Your back is right up against his front, and he leans over you from above, his face just mere inches from yours. “So yeah. I would miss you if you weren’t here to share your disease with me. Thought you wouldn’t come tonight. Didn’t like it.” 

He exhales and adjusts his body so his top is level with yours, and buries his face into your neck. “Missed you today.” His breath on your neck makes you shudder and giggle, your hand shooting up to lift his head up by his forehead, making him groan in response. 

“Stop. You’re warm.” He says, opening his eyes again and looking down to meet yours. His breath hitches in his throat. 

You’re looking up at him with wide eyes, the moonlight shining in through his window highlighting the subtle pink blush on your cheeks. He’s convinced he’s never seen anything more ethereal in his life than you in that very moment. As sick as you may be, with your hair scrunched up and sporting your Pokemon pyjamas, Megumi had never seen anything so beautiful in his life. 

He gazes into your eyes for a few more seconds, but it felt like forever to you. “Damn it..” He ends up muttering to himself, gritting his teeth and moving quickly, his body now hovering over you with his arms on either side of your head, caging you in. 

He gazes at you once again from above, as though you had hung the moon and the stars before he dips his dead and places a tender kiss to the side of your face, resting his forehead against yours. 

“Y/n,” he speaks gently, his breath tickling your cheek, before he presses another kiss to your face. “I’m sorry. If I’m wrong about this, you can laugh at me. You can ask me to leave you alone. But I need to know - do you… feel for me, the way I feel for you?” 

Your heart races once again, feeling like it’s going to burst through your ribcage at any given moment. You bring both of your hands up, one running through the messy hair at the back of his head and one cupping his cheek. You stay silent, looking into his eyes. 

“Just say it y/n. Tell me what you’re thinking.” He pleads, his face edging ever so slowly closer to yours. 

“I’m thinking,” you start, flashing him a bright smile. “That I should’ve stayed over in these pyjamas sooner. If this was all it took to get you to make a move, we could’ve done this ages ago.”

Megumi hums, giving you a soft grin before closing the gap between you both and pressing his lips to yours. The kiss is tender, gentle. You smile against his lips and wrap both of your arms around his neck. He leans in impossibly closer, one arm holding himself above you and the other trails down your body to your hip, down to your thigh before hooking your leg around his waist and settling against your body. 

Megumi pulls away to catch his breath, but not before burying his head in your neck, peppering a bunch of gentle kisses against your sensitive skin, pulling the most adorable laugh from you. 

“So, just to be clear.. This means we’re.. together, right? Like - we’re a thing?” You probe, feeling your cheeks flush hot when you feel him chuckle into your neck. He lifts himself up again, head hovering above yours, midnight blue eyes staring into your soul. 

“Don’t be dense, y/n.” He presses another long kiss to your lips before pulling away again. “Of course we’re a thing. You’re mine, my girl. That is, if you want to be.”

You immediately pull him back down, gaining a slight growl from him as you kiss him feverishly, both of your tongues fighting for dominance after a moment. You feel him harden against your clothed core for a split second before he pulls back.

“Why’d you stop?” You whine, looking up at him with the same wide eyes that you know he folds for every.single.time. 

Megumi audibly moans out loud before lifting up again, fingers messily trying to pull at the zip to your Charmander onesie. “Please… get this damn thing off. I need you, Angel.” He growls. 

To say this was the most intense and intimate night of your life to date would be an understatement. You and Megumi gave each other your all, resulting in you both being each other's first sexual experiences. 

It was messy and (sorry Megumi) rather quick, but for the two of you, it was perfect. Because this was the very start of the relationship that you would treasure so dearly for the rest of your life. 

-Present day-

You’re standing facing the dorm room door, one hand on the handle, with your back to your boyfriend. Or should I say; now ex boyfriend. 

A single tear escapes, falling down your cheek. You bite your bottom lip in a weak attempt to stop your composure from snapping. You didn’t want him to see you like this, to give him the satisfaction. 

“I… I don’t want you to be upset…” He starts, his voice soft and strained. He runs a hand through his hair and glances down at his feet, his brows pinched together in frustration. “I just want the best for you, y/n. Can’t you see that? Our jobs are dangerous. I’m tired of having to deal with my own shit on top of having to worry about you, too. It’s been this way for a while and it’s just not… working… for me anymore.” 

His words pierce your heart like a knife. For a while???

Your lip trembles beyond your control as your entire relationship flashes before your eyes. From your arrival at Jujutsu Tech for your first year, to your close friendship, to your blossoming relationship. All those nights you spent together - they couldn’t all be for nothing, surely. 

You take a deep breath in, and exhale, trying to gather enough composure to ask one final question before you leave, before your emotions cave and you break down right in front of him. You turn around and face him entirely. “Is there someone else?”

His heart cracks at the question. How could you possibly ask something so.. - no. 

He was the one that just broke up with you out of the blue. Of course your mind is going to wander to the impossible. This was the inevitable truth that sadly, Megumi couldn’t come up with a way to avoid when he was planning this. 

“No, y/n. There isn’t anybody else. I just..” He’s no longer looking at you, instead he’s looking through you, trying not to take in your reaction. “I just don’t don’t love you anymore. I’m sorry. You didn’t do anything, you just… need a lot of reassurance. I guess I just fell out of love. I’m so-” 

“Stop.” You beg, the tears burning your eyes, threatening to spill. “Stop saying sorry. Just stop explaining. You’ve said enough, I hear you loud and clear. I’m sorry, I won’t bother you anymore.” You’re talking so fast you’re stumbling over your words. 

“Bye, Fushiguro.” You choke out, turning around and leaving through the dorm room door as quickly as you possibly could, sprinting past Yuji’s door and back to the privacy of your own room where you lock your door and throw yourself into your bed. 

Curling up into a foetal position and letting your tears flow freely, trying and failing to catch your breath, hyperventilating into your pillow. 

Megumi Fushiguro broke your heart that day. 

Megumi Fushiguro broke his promise to you, and himself, that day. That he would never make you cry.

There’s no way it can end like this. Right?

Wrong. It can, and it has. 

Megumi stares at his door for a minute after you leave, half hoping you’ll come back, but knowing deep in his heart that you won’t. 

After hearing your door slam, and internally cursing himself for a moment, he backs himself toward his bed, sitting on the edge and placing his head in his hands, rubbing his eyes hard. 

Once he opens his eyes again, he catches sight of something, something fluffy and orange folded up neatly at the bottom of his bed. 

Something that shatters his heart entirely. His breath is suddenly knocked out of him, and he’s doubled over the side of his bed, letting his tears fall into his hands. 

It was your Charmander onesie. 

“Dammit.” Megumi shouts to himself, throwing his phone across the room, gritting his teeth and pulling at his hair while tears fall freely down his cheeks.

What the hell has he done to you?

Note:

AAAAAAA!!! This is my first ever fully written fic - I'm so sorry about the angst loool I promise it will get better!

Sorry if it's a bit messy - I'm really not used to writing anything that isn't an SMAU heheh

If anyone's interested in being in a taglist for this fic, please do let me know and I'll create one <333

Much love and mwah!

[givethemsmut]

Cody Rhodes x Reader

Made of Gold | Chapter Four

Trigger Warning

- Mention of abortion (not how you think, prob why I hate to give trigger warnings)

C O D Y ‘ S P O V

I was riding the high of being the first man between her legs, still wearing her orgasm on my cock when I yanked the door open enough to see who was standing there.

A middle aged man stood there, dark wild eyes, when his shrill voice hit my eardrums. “Where is my daughter? I know she’s here.”

Barging past the door I gripped the blanket hanging low on my waist, securing it from exposing myself. I was in a state of shock and the urge to fight ignited from the bottom of me like a brush fire. “Excuse me?”

Stepping toe-to-toe with me, whiskey on his breath, “Don’t play dumb. I know she’s been hiding out here. I’ll find her myself.”

He went to move past me but I side stepped, blocking him from the stairs altogether. “I was trying to be nice but I guess you’re picking the hard way. I wouldn’t step another foot inside my house, you might see something you don’t wanna see like your daughter in bed.”

“She’s under age,” his finger dug into my chest and my hand closed into a tight fist. I wanted to lash out but he had a point.

“And ruin the most important night of her life so far? I’m not naked for the fun of it, pal. You are the last person she wants to see after losing her virginity.” My words were sharp, heavy, assaulting the way I meant them to be.

Her father looked up at me as I took another step, towering over him now, “I want her home before I press charges for kidnapping.”

“Family dinner sounds great. How about Friday at your place?” I smirked knowing I won and her father did in fact hate me the way she wanted. I was a family’s dream unless you’re a few months shy of eighteen and a virgin than I’m considered a nightmare.

Heading upstairs I took two at a time and without even making it past the threshold I heard the light sound of her snoring. Wrapped in a blanket that covered only her boobs and pussy she was curled up on her side fast asleep. Exhaling I could sleep easy know she didn’t hear a single part of that chat.

Now I had to convince her to go dinner with people she had been avoiding. People who didn’t make her feel safe or happy.

Hell, I even hated them and I didn’t know them.

I wanted to protect her, keep her from every ounce of harm and I didn’t care how fucking wrong it is that I’m older than her. Age was bullshit concept when we fit together like we did twenty minuets ago before her dad stormed my house like a maniac.

The next morning we fell into our routine of me working out before she woke up and her joining me in the shower. She was washing the shampoo out of her long hair while I scrapped soap around my muscles. “I want to meet your parents…”

She turned out with a hostile look on her face, “Why?”

“You know so much about my family, my dad, my brother and sister. Hell, last time I FaceTimed my mom she wanted to talk to you but I don’t know much about your family.”

We swapped spots under the water and I could feel her resentment on the topic. “They aren’t like your family. There’s not enough good to even tell you about. Let’s just drop it.”

Exhaling I let the water beat on my face, swiping it off, I pushed. “Please. Just call them. Let’s do dinner on Friday.”

“Cody. Why are pushing this? Do you regret what we did and this is your way of pushing me away?”

Fuck.

I had pushed and now she created some monster of an idea why.

Turning around I dragged her close, holding her against me, her perfect ass wedged against me. “I’m sorry, okay? I don’t regret anything. Your dad showed up last night… he’s gonna press charges unless we go to dinner Friday.”

Pushing me away in anger, she shout, “Are you fucking serious?”

Before I could even answer, she had exited the shower, grabbed a towel and slammed the bathroom door. It was our first fight.

Giving her space, I showered like normal and wrapped a towel around my waist all too similarly to last night when her dad showed up. Leaning against the door frame of the bathroom I watched her franticly get her makeup on.

“Babe. I didn’t wanna have to tell you he showed up.”

“You want to meet them so badly then let’s go to dinner tonight. I’m not doing anything on his terms, why, so he can be in control? I don’t think so. Get eady for all your demons to served up with dinner.” Texting furiously, her fingers clicked against every button, before dropping it in her lap.

Moving closer, standing behind her, I softened my face even more. “Just talk to me. I wasn’t going to let him storm our fucking room and harass you ten seconds after losing your virginity. This was settling, a family dinner.”

“You don’t know him. That’s not settling, it’s what he wants and probably to ruin us.” She was still running hot when I gave her space, letting her decompress while I occupied another part of the house. If dinner was all we had to do to make them leave us alone I was willing to do it. I was willing to do a whole hell of a lot more actually.

R E A D E R S P O V

Did I want to be drunk for family dinner? Absolutely. I knew exactly the kind of tactics that would be weaponized for not coming home then to be found with Cody, someone older and not of my father's choosing.

It made our love story seem like a tragedy, the forbidden, albeit taboo relationship when Cody was so much more than that.

He felt safe, something I haven't truly felt since I got old enough to talk back.

My father didn't have expecatations - he had demands and when those demands weren't met, well, than he had retalation. It wasn't a dynamic I wanted Cody to witness and think of our age difference even more.

Doning a simple black maxi dress with an open back and a pair of comfortable heels I finished smearing my lipstick in while Cody changed his tie for the millionth time. He was nervous and I didn't want to make it worse for him.

Taking my hand, wordlessly, I stood up and took the lead down the stairs. "We should do a shot before we go. We both need it," I suggested it but knew my tumblr was already coated in whiskey I had been drinking.

"Maybe you had enough babe."

Disregarding him entirely I poured two healthy shots of Wheatley Vodka and pushed the shotglass towards him. "I don't want you to get in trouble when I pushed you to take my virginity... that's the only reason I am doing this."

Not yet shooting his back he came closer, hands hoovering and his face full of concern. "Just tell me what I need to know before we go over there. Why are you scared of your father? That’s not normal.”

My eyes started to well up rapidly and I kept looking up, avoiding eye contact and the unavoidable tears ruining my makeup. It was too much to explain, too much to live through again as I explained it and the way I knew he could judge me felt like a deathwish on us.

"Let's just go,” I mumbled before downing another shot.

Cody opened every door until I was safely tucked inside his car, foot pressed down on the gas in his truck that felt more like a tank. Sitting back with one hand on the wheel I could feel his eyes glance over at me. His vest tight to his frame and the white button up with the subtle tie only made him look more like a dirty secret. His features were haunting and his toned body only made the threat to devour you seem so much more real. Everything about him scream predator yet all of him was nice enough to care.

“It sounds silly saying it out loud… Every boyfriend I had he would blackmail into dumping me, every friendship ruined, every chance he had to isolate me he did. Controlling, overbearing, abusive. I remember he drugged me just to keep me home after I vanished for a week. I was at Layla’s but it didn’t matter, no permission, no warning was all it took to earn his wrath. I’ve been at your house for much longer, wonder what kind of punishment it will be this time.”

His hand shook my leg like he wanted to wake me up, “I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. Do you know how hard it was to not hurt him when he showed up? Hurt him for just wanting to drag you away from me.”

Forcing myself to relax, I tried to melt into his touch, keeping my mouth closed and wishing I was more drunk.

By the time we got past the gate that protected their castle I felt my heart pick up speed. I wanted to burn the whole place to the ground and hope the memories went with it.

Taking his hand, I followed his lead, knocking at the door like a gentleman. The door flew open and my mother presented her best rendition of perfect housewife. “Come in, you must be her friend, Cody, right?”

“Yes, ma’am, Cody Runnels.”

She nudged me out, leading him inside and leaving me by the door like discarded trash.

Not bothering to pick up the pace to catch up I strutted behind them, watching her try to dazzle him the way I expected. “Tell me about yourself. Come have a seat.”

“I’m a legacy wrestler, I wrestle for WWE now, I grew up here, my father passed away last year, and I’m falling in love with your daughter.” He sounded so sure and I felt hit by his confession like a ton of bricks.

He falling for me? Did I even want that?

I wanted him to take my virginity so badly I had thought of what I wanted next.

I whispered a warning cry, “Cody…”

His 1000 watt smile flashed in my direction as his hand came up my leg. “We can talk about it later.”

Feeling the air sucked out of the room my father’s signature glass of ice and scotch pierced my ears. “Falling for my daughter? Does she know all the skeletons in your closet, son? No woman should fall for just the good version. They have to love the bad too.”

My mom placed the last dish down on the table and sat down with us when my eyes tried to beg her to hold him off but it was no use. She was brainwashed by the good life and ruining that was never going to happen.

“Everyone had demons, sir.” Cody wasn’t afraid and the puddle in my panties now was distracting. “Like tracking your daughter to my house after losing her virginity? Storming my stairs trying to ruin that moment? Like those kind of demons.”

“Watch your mouth, son. I did some digging on you. Don’t forget you’ve lived a lot of life that my daughter hasn’t at seventeen.” He paused dramatically and Cody goated him to continue. “There’s been a long string of woman, hasn’t there? A few virgins, a few abortions, a dropped compliant after a bar fight with a female. Sounds like you can’t treat woman well so you imagine my surprise when you say you plan to love her.”

Cody shifted in his seat but still not scared of my father the way I was taught. “I can’t warrant any response to that. I’ve been with virgins when I was younger, of course. Are you implying I can tell by glancing at them? Absurd.”

Sipping his scotch until the end, my mom bounced up to get him a refill. “No, son, I’m saying you have a habit of liking young woman who are guaranteed virgins.”

Cody shot up from his seat, “We’re leaving. Come on.”

Dragging me behind him to the door my father matched his energy. Standing with a new glass, shouting after us, “She’s still seventeen, son. That’s still against the law.”

Stopping at the door, he swiftly turned around, taking the steps to stand toe-to-toe with my father. “I already took her virginity, cats out of the bag, she’s eighteen soon and you can’t do anything about it.”

“Son, she’ll get bored of the thrill of you like she always does. This is just a long string of bad behavior to piss me off.”

“Trust me, sir, no one was thinking of you while she was screaming my name.” Cody stood there proudly of those details and I could feel my cheeks flare up red.

“Least wear a condom son, she doesn’t need to be one of those girls you paid to have an abortion,” my dad shouted after us as Cody yanked the door open and the cool night air felt like new oxygen to our lungs.

Neither of us had talked about skeletons, neither of us shared the uncomfortable traits we carried, not yet.

Climbing into the truck Cody nearly did a burn out in the driveway before leaving, scaring their perfect castle. “I didn’t pay anyone to get an abortion. Let’s make that clear. I helped pay for a mutual solution.”

Every part of him was tense, even the muscles around his perfectly chiseled jaw. “Okay, how many?”

“Two.”

Keeping my voice just above a whisper I watched his hands grip the steering wheel hard, “I didn’t expect to be the only virgin, Cody. No one is questioning you. Everyone has a past.”

“He’s trying to imply I seek out fucking virgins. You’ve seen my dick, do you think I need virgins to get off? I didn’t even want to hurt you last night.”

“Cody,” I said sternly trying to keep last night out of my mind because every time I thought of it I got goosebumps and the space between my legs would ache for more.

Glancing over at me he caught me lightly rubbing my legs together and biting my lip. “Oh, shit, babe. You’re still riding that high.”

I felt like I could come just thinking about his cock, about being inside me, feeling those memories wash over me like I was there again. My legs started shaking a little and I tried to compose myself in the passenger seat.

Requested Tags:

@alyyaanna

[tothosewholisten]

Forever Healed | TUA insert

Chapter: 05

<<previous chapter | next chapter>>

Masterlist

…

Five and I discussed our new plan on the way back to the academy.

“We need to go back, now.” Five insisted as he paced around his bedroom.

I stood by the door trying to distance myself from the angry teen.

“I know..” I pause. “But you already saw how demanding works. And also you're a kid, of course they didn't take you seriously.”

“Why is this eye so important anyway?” I ask.

He huffs. “Whoever has this eye brings upon the end of the world. I need to figure out who it is.”

Every time Five repeats that the world is ending I try to ignore it. But with the D-day getting closer and closer I realize I need to do a few things on my bucket list.

“We need someone else.” He mutters, breaking me out of my thoughts.

He's right, our story wasn't convincing at all. You need a strong narrative to get information out of suckers. So we need a dramatic person who can play a part.

Suddenly it dawned on me. We need-

..

“You know, I am so thrilled to join your guys' spy mission! It's just like old times.” Klaus reminisced with sappy tears in his eyes.

“I don't think we've ever done this.” Five retorts.

I know that the boy wasn't the most excited about getting help from Klaus but I told him if Klaus puts his mind to it, we're getting that information.

Five and I went over to the dining room where Klaus was snoring on the couch. In his underwear.

At first he wouldn't get up, that was until Five offered him twenty dollars and he bolted upstairs to get ready. We trailed after him back to Five’s room where he was waiting on Five's bed.

I love Klaus but his outfit choices have always been questionable even when we were teens.

“What are you wearing?” I asked disgustedly.

I did not receive an answer because Five heard a noise and peered his head out the door.

An annoyed look on his face appeared when he turned back around to us. “Vanya's here. Klaus hide.” He whispers.

Klaus gets up from the bed and dashes around the room, looking for anywhere that's big enough to fit his lanky body. I point to Five's closet.

He contorts himself to fit inside and closes the door behind him. Just in time too because Vanya walks into the room.

“Thank god, I was worried sick about you two.” She expressed her uneasiness.

I frowned. “Sorry, we left without saying goodbye.” If only I wasn't dragged by that little boy I would've loved to talk to her more.

“No look. I'm the one who should be sorry.” Vanya turns to Five. “Yeah, I was dismissive, and I– I guess I couldn't process what you were saying. And I still can't to be honest.” She stutters out.

I couldn't tell if it was an act but Five’s face turned almost sad. “Maybe you were right to be dismissive.” He says.

I'm not sure where this acting was when we were at Meritech. But I match his hurt look.

“Maybe it wasn't real after all. It felt real. Well like you said, the old man did say time travel could contaminate the mind.” Five continued.

Five is interrupted by a loud crash that comes from the closet. I ran over to stand in front of it trying to distract from the noises Klaus was making as they kept talking.

“Then maybe I'm not the right person for you to be talking to. Look, I used to see someone. A therapist, I could give you her information.” Vanya shares.

Five is quick to feign a smile. “No thanks, but I think I'm just going to get something to eat. It's been a long time since I've had good food.”

Vanya nods and steps back out of the room.

As soon as Five goes back to the door to make sure that she is gone, the warm look on his face disappears and his permanent scowl returns instead.

The closet behind me starts to shake and I take a step away hoping that Klaus doesn't decide to fall on me.

His curled body leaps out of the closet. “That was so… touching!” He trips over fallen junk from the closet. “All that stuff about family and Dad and time. Wow!”

“Will you shut up, she'll hear you.” He yells.

“I'm moist.”

“What the hell Klaus.” I scoot further away from him.

Five takes a moment to look him up and down. “I thought I told you to put on something professional.”

The outfit he put on was a green button-up shirt with frilly red-lined sleeves. Honestly atrocious.

“What? This is my nicest outfit.” Klaus cries.

“Let's go look at the old man's closet,” I suggest pushing Klaus out of the room.

Five groans before following us out.

“As long as I get paid,” Klaus exclaims.

“When the job is done.”

He stops us. “Okay, but just so we're clear on the finer details. I just gotta go into this place and pretend to be your dear old Dad. Correct?”

“Yeah, something like that,” I replied.

“What's our cover story then?”

“What? What are you talking about?” Five gives him a puzzled look.

“I mean, was I really young when I had y/n? Like, 16? Like, young and terribly misguided. Then yada yada some years later you came along, Five.” Klaus rambles putting his hands on his chest.

“Sure.”

“Your mother, that slut.. whoever she was. We met at.. oh! The disco.”

I cackle at Klaus’s backstory but Five couldn't look more concerned.

“Remember that.” The man snaps. “Oh, my god, the sex was amazinggg.”

“What a disturbing glimpse into that thing you call a brain.” Five turns to go down the stairs.

Klaus holds out his pointer like a stern dad. “Don't make me put you into time out.” He yells.

..

“Like I said to your son and daughter?” The same doctor questions us from before.

We arrived at the same part of the building but this time the man had the decency to bring us to his office.

“Yes, these are my children,” Klaus replies affirmatively.

He now had on one of Reginald's many suits; it made him look the part.

“Yeah, can't you tell?” My hand messaging my temple as I throw that in, trying to mask my sarcasm, cause well none of us looked alike.

“Well, like I told your children earlier, any information about the prosthetics we build is strictly confidential.” The man emphasizes each word to us like we are all babies.

Klaus sat in a chair across from the man's desk and I sat in the other, but Five stood up in the middle of us with his hands on the doctor's glass desk. Getting ready for round two of his yelling match.

“Without the client's consent. I simply can't help you.”

“Well, we can't get consent if you don't give us a name.” Five yells.

The doctor looks defeated. “Well, that's not my problem.”

I’m sure Five wished his powers were laser eyes instead of teleportation because of how he was staring at the man so intensely.

“Sorry. Now, there's really nothing more I can do, so–”

Klaus looked up from his lap. “And what about my consent?”

“Excuse me?”

Everyone turns to look at him.

“Who gave you permission… to lay your hands on my son?” Klaus cried.

“What?” Five, the doctor and I all say at once.

“You heard me.”

“I didn't touch your son.” The man states matter of factly.

Klaus slowly gets up from his chair “Oh, really? Well, how did he get that swollen lip then?”

“He doesn't have a swollen-”

The man didn't have time to finish his sentence because Klaus suddenly swung at Five and slapped him in the mouth.

I hide my expression with my palm and watch.

He inhales sharply. “I want it. Name, please. Now.” He slaps his hands onto the doctor's desk.

The man stutters trying to think of something to say. “You're crazy.” He replies.

Klaus fakes a chuckle. “You got no idea.”

He picks up the snow globe on the man's desk. “Peace on earth? That's so sweet.” He reads out loud.

He then smashes the snow globe into his head causing everyone to let out a shriek as it breaks into tiny pieces. I cringe looking at all that blood on his head.

He screams out. “God that hurt.” Water from the snow globe dripped all over his face.

The man doesn't break eye contact with Klaus but hurryingly reaches for the telephone on his desk.

“I'm calling secur– what are you doing?” The man yells out but Klaus takes the telephone right from his sweaty hands.

“There's been an assault… in Mr. Big's office, and we need security, now. Schnell!” Klaus screams into the telephone before slamming it back onto its post.

He sighs. “Now, here's what's gonna happen, Grant.”

“It's… Lance.”

“In about sixty seconds two security guards are gonna burst through that door, and they're gonna see a whole lot of blood and wonder ‘What the hell happened?’ And we're gonna tell them that you… beat the shit out of us!” Klaus rambles.

“While making googly eyes at my young daughter!” He sobs.

Five stares at Klaus admirably.

“You're gonna do great in prison, Grant. Trust me, I've been there. A little piece of chicken like you. Oh my god, you're gonna get passed around like a…” He moves his hips in a circle to make a point.

Then shutters thinking back at old memories. “You're just– you're gonna do great. That's all I'm saying.”

Lance almost cries out looking at all of us. “Jesus, you are a real sick bastard.”

Klaus stares at him blankly. “Thank you.”

He spits out a piece of snow globe glass. The look on Five face is priceless, I'm for one so proud of Klaus right now. He never went Broadway but this was pretty close.

Lance rushes over to a long line of filing cabinets. Searching for the information that will satisfy us. Klaus sat on top of the cabinet making the doctor go even faster, fearing for his life.

“Oh, that's strange.” He says.

“What.” Five ask.

“Uh, the eye. It hasn't been purchased by a client yet.”

Klaus jumps off the cabinet and gets up into Lance's face. “What? What do you mean?” He whispers.

“Well, uh, our logs say that the eye with that serial number… This can't be right. It hasn't even been manufactured yet.” Lance looks up at Five. “Where did you get that eye?”

Five huffs. He walks away from all of us to the elevator and leaves us with Lance.

I grab onto Klaus to move him outside as he blows Lance a smooch before we go into the elevator as well.

We walk out of the building's doors when Five starts to talk again. “Well, this is not good.” He says.

“I was pretty good, though, right? ‘Yeah. What about my consent, bitch?” He laughs.

“Klaus, it doesn't matter.” The boy sighs and we stop walking.

“What? What, what's the big deal with this eye, anyways?” The hurt Klaus asks.

I grab onto the two men to heal them of their injuries before answering for Five who looks like he's about to explode.

“There's someone out there who's going to lose an eye in the next seven days. And they're gonna bring about the end of life on earth as we know it!” I say, rubbing my forehead.

“Yeah, can I get that twenty bucks, like, now, or what?”

I stare at my adopted brother with my brows furrowed. “You're not gonna question what I just said, at all?”

Five steps closer to him. “The apocalypse is coming and all you can think about is getting high?”

“Well, I'm also quite hungry. Tummies a rumblin.” Klaus wiggles his fingers to imitate grumbling.

“You're useless.” Five shakes his head while walking away from the two of us to sit on the building's steps.

“Oh come on, you need to lighten up old man!” Klaus mocks. I move from Klaus to sit near Five and listen to the rest of Klaus’s spiel.

“Hey, you know, I’ve just now realized why you're so uptight. You must be horny as hell!”

Klaus’s laughter is matched by my own as he sits next to us. “That’s not funny Klaus,” I reply still giggling. Five on the other hand wasn’t amused, he looked deep in thought not even staring in our direction.

“All those years by yourself, it's gotta screw with your head, being alone.”

Five concentration breaks, “well.” He starts. “I wasn't alone.” Klaus and I immediately go silent and stare at him.

“Spill,” I say.

“Her name was Delores. We were together for over thirty years.” The small bit of happiness on Five's face was very easy to see.

“Thirty years? Oh, wow!” Klaus chuckles. “God, the longest I've been with someone.. I didn't know for three weeks. And that's only because I was so tired from looking for a place to sleep.”

Klaus went on like that for a good five minutes rambling about his love life and how hard it was not having anywhere to stay. I yawned in desperate need of a break from whatever this was. And it looked like Five was ready to blink away.

I turned to him and signaled that we should leave by nudging my head to the busy road that was right in front of the building. He nods back at me.

“He did make the most fantastic osso buco, though. It was..”

Five takes hold of my sleeve and we blink from the steps into a taxi. “Don’t stop, just keep driving.” Five demands of the panicked driver.

“Hey! Where’d you guys go?” I hear Klaus yell as we drive past him. Five turns to the window and gives Klaus a wave that makes him instantly stand up and try to run over to us.

“Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, what about my money?!” He shouts but we’re long gone by then. I would’ve felt bad if this wasn't so funny.

Five was bleak at times and angry, and a lot of other things but he had his fun moments. We missed a lot of time getting to know each other but, this made up for it.

“So where to now?” I ask.

“I am going to run, uh an errand. I'm dropping you off at the academy.”

“Sounds good to me.” I smile. I needed this break to rest today. It was exhausting. “Our adventures have been fun, we should do it again.”

He turns to me, “Oh yeah?”

I hum in response.

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

The sky turned a vibrant shade of dark blue by the time we reached a familiar street, we were almost at the academy. I kinda wanted to join Five on his errand but I didn't say anything.

I paid the taxi driver the spare tens in my pocket for not freaking out and reminded myself that I'd pay Klaus tomorrow too. And walked up to the doors of the Umbrella Academy.

“Goodnight Five!” I call out as I open the front door. But I walked in before hearing his response, only hearing the sound of the taxi driving away.

..

I found myself in a spot I always went to when I needed to escape my ‘father’. It was a storage closet-like room that had a tiny balcony where Ben and I would hang out in the late hours of the night.

But now I was by myself and Ben was nowhere to be found. So I lit a cigarette and stared at the night sky. It’s a bad habit that I picked up during all my time with Klaus, It did help me calm my nerves though.

“Y/n?”

I turned around to see Alison in the doorway. A frown was painted on her beautiful face.

“It's good to see you, I didn't expect you to still be here.” She expressed while sitting down next to me.

“Me neither but I had a busy day chasing around a fifty-something-year-old. Thought I'd stay just to see what else happened around here. Or the truth could be I just kinda missed it around here, I'm not sure.”

Alison nodded. “I'm glad you're here, we haven’t really talked at all I've just been so busy with trying to get in touch with Claire and-“

I briefly cut her off. “Yeah, is everything okay with that?”

“My ex-husband, Patrick is trying to make it seem like I don’t care about this court stuff. Since I'm missing a session of mandated therapy.” She huffs.

“Can I have a cigarette?”

I reached into my black jacket pocket and pulled out the pack. Half of it was already empty but I just bought it before I came here, I guess I need more.

“Wouldn't the court recognize that as like, certain circumstances?” I ask.

“Yes! That’s what I tried to tell him. But he won't listen at all.” Alison groaned, holding the now-lit cigarette.

I smirk. “He sounds like an ass.”

“You don’t even know,” we both shared a good laugh.

“But,” she says while laughing. “What’s been going on with you? I know that's very broad because we haven’t seen each other since my wedding but, have you been doing anything new?”

I look forward to the pitch-black sky. “Yeah uhm, not much,”

Alison thinks for a moment, “Oh! I know. Whatever happened to your boyfriend? The guy you brought to my wedding.”

I froze, my mouth slightly open and the cigarette I held between my lips fell to the balcony floor. “Oh him..”

“Did something happen Y/n?”

“No no, we just broke up I guess.”

Alison grabs onto my hand, squeezing me tightly. “I'm so sorry.” She says.

It’s not that I forgot about my ex, no I couldn’t. I just liked to pretend that he was a part of my childhood nothing more. But in reality, we only broke up about half a year ago.

“We didn’t have the best relationship,” I told her. “He wasn't the nicest guy but I stayed. We were on and off but I officially broke up with him a couple of months ago.”

She fiddled with her curly hair. “I would’ve never been able to tell, he just seemed so nice at the time. I thought you guys were the perfect match. Y/n I'm so sorry, forget I brought him up.”

“It’s okay, I mean you didn't know,” I reassured the woman.

“If you need anything I'm always here for you, you know? I don’t think we were ever the closet but. I'm here for you.” Alison states.

I wasn't sure how to respond, this was all so surreal. Telling someone how I felt was like a boulder being lifted off my chest. I was comfortable enough to do it again.

“Thank you, Alison, I appreciate you.” I grinned

“Miss Alison, are you up here?” Pogo's voice called out. The ape walked into the room as dapper as ever in his suit. “Ah, Miss Y/n you’re up here too good.”

“I was looking for you.” He said to Alison.

We quickly put out our cigarettes and turned our attention to Pogo.

“How did you, uh.. How’d you know I was up here?” She asked.

“Well it wasn't hard, this is where you two would always come when you were upset. I remember it, yes.” He nodded.

I didn’t know that Alison would come here too. All of our childhood I felt myself slightly put up against her when really we couldn’t be more alike.

“Who told you I was.. Luther.” She sighs.

“It was Miss Vanya. She called to make sure you were okay.”

“What happened?” I blurt out.

Alison stretches her legs by walking around the room. “I said some pretty

unkind things to her earlier.”

Pogo shook his head. “She’s your sister. She knows you didn't mean it.”

“Doubt it” Alison scoffs. “She doesn't know anything about me, which is fine because I don’t know shit about here either.”

That was the downside of all of us branching out, we never stayed in touch. If I had moved to a different state I would’ve never known how Klaus was doing and how I could help him. How different my life could’ve been, I mean what if I didn't come to the funeral? Life would’ve died without me having the slightest clue.

“Language”

Alison chuckles at his humor. “Sorry.”

Afraid of just sitting there, I cut into their conversation. “It has been a while since we’ve lived under the same roof, you know?”

They both agree with my sentiment.

“Almost thirteen years,” Pogo said

“Wow,” Alison and I both remark.

“How did you do it? Also in this big house for so long?” I ask.

“Well, one grows used to things, even if sometimes.. one shouldn’t.” He replies, the sadness evident in his voice.

I should’ve visited him, I'm an adult, Reginald can’t scare me anymore and no one was here. I was so close to them but still, I never wanted to come back without a reason. This place was my home for many years, yes, but it wasn’t my first home.

Pogo senses that we’re both down in the dumps. “You two should come with me. I want to show you something. It might just cheer you up,” he says.

..

We followed Pogo downstairs into one of the mansion's many rooms. But I don’t think I’ve ever seen this room before. The hallway was dark with only a few orange lights that barely helped see anything.

The tiny room was filled with rows of old TVs and controls with glowing buttons. Most of the tvs were black but there were a few Pogo must've turned on. Then he went into a box and pulled out a tape. He placed it into the TV closest to him.

The tape played old security camera recordings of us as kids, probably around thirteen from what we looked like. It would’ve been creepy if it didn't make me sad, these memories are some of the good times at the academy that I ignored because of all the bad.

Alison and I gawked at the footage. We sat in two chairs that were in front of the TVs as Pogo talked to us from behind. “Your father stopped recording years ago. But I still come here from time to time. When I'm missing you kids.” He said.

Alison was the first to speak. “Pogo, this is..” she sighs. “Most families have home movies to look back on. We have surveillance footage.”

“I hoped it might cheer you up.”

I laugh. “This definitely does.”

Previous to the new tape Pogo just put in, some of the other TVs had more footage. My eyes drifted from screen to screen soaking up all the cute moments.

“Oh my god look how little we were,” Alison tells me.

One screen was Alison and I in her room trying on Grace’s clothes. “Ohh, I remember this,” I said.

And Alison turns to see the one I'm looking at. “This was so fun! Mom always had the best clothes.” She exclaimed.

Grace's dresses were obviously too big for us, but that didn't stop us. Her clothes were modeled after old housewives of a different time and might look strange and out of date to others. But we loved them.

I moved to another screen of me, Ben and Klaus talking. We were sitting on one of the main staircases. I wish I could freeze time to that moment forever, just the three of us again.

Alison follows where my sad eyes are staring. “I miss him so much.” She said upsetly.

“Me too” I whisper.

The screen next to that was of Vanya, playing her violin alone. You could hear the sound of us children in the background and Alison’s voice while she played by herself. It was the heartbreaking reality of our childhood.

“Why didn't we include her? I mean if anyone ever treated Claire like that, I can’t even imagine.” Alison wonders.

“You were children, Miss Alison,” Pogo replies.

“Yeah.. but I'm not anymore and neither is she.”

Pogo straightens up like he’s getting ready to head out. “If you two aren’t in a hurry. There’s more tapes in that cabinet.” He nudges his head to a large cabinet overflowing with tapes with all different labels.

The man drops the key into my hand. “Make sure to lock up when you're done, things have been disappearing lately. These are too important to lose.”

I tell him I will and Pogo heads back out through the door. But before he leaves he gives us one more look. I turn back towards the screens and rethink back to those happier days.

Alison stands up to go over to the cabinet, she picks up a similar-looking tape. But above the box, there was a rusty tape. The label was gone and it looked scratched up.

“What’s that?” I ask. She opens it and slides it into a screen.

“I don’t know but I guess we're gonna see.” She hits rewind and it starts to buffer before playing. The video was harder to make out than all the other black-and-white films. Alison and I both leaned in and once my eyes focused it was clear what was going on.

“Oh god, Dad.”

…

Aug 14 update:

If you'd like to be added to the tag list for rest of the series (starts at chapter 10) say taglist in the comments!

[zeltqz]

𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒 [𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐌𝐏𝐄𝐃] SIX

pairing. ex!ran x fem!reader

word count. 7k

series synopsis. bonten is forming and in the midst of it all, you find yourself caught in the sticky webs of your ex boyfriend and current bonten executive, haitani ran.

content. smoking, mild drug use, SMUT, mentions of past alcohol addiction, murder/implied death threats

a/n: i am so SORRRY you all had to wait like two fucking months for the next chapter. I came back from my summer vacation and had my birthday recently so i was inactive sorry sososrryryryryr 😔😔 hope you enjoyed this chapter ily all

2006

You tried concentrating as you poured some milk into your cereal but the sounds of the TV channels being flipped every two seconds drove you to borderline insanity. “Would you chill out?” you asked, glaring at Ran over your bowl of cereal.

“Can’t find anything worth watching.” He was lounging around in your living room, his feet kicked up on your table and shrugged, turning to look at you and flashing a cheesy yet charming grin in your direction. 

Your mother walked down the stairs, rubbing her eyes tiredly. When she saw a shirtless Ran sitting on her couch, she almost passed out when she saw the litter of tattoos on his chest, trailing up and down his leg and arm. 

Ran felt her stare and glanced at her, raising a curious eyebrow and anything she had to complain about instantly faded as she shut her mouth and walked over to the kitchen. 

She dragged you to a corner of the kitchen, one where Ran couldn’t hear. “Is this the guy…you were telling me about?” she asked, concerned.

“Yes?” you responded, looking at her weirdly and scooped your spoon back into your cereal. “Why?”

“Why is he here..? At ten in the morning?”

“Oh. Because he slept over.” You took a bite of your food, satisfied with the small unhelpful answers you were giving her.

“Oh. I didn’t see him last night. What time did you get home?”

You shrugged. “Around 2-3?”

She pressed her lips together, firmly. “Where’s his shirt?”

“I got hot during the night,” you laughed but she didn’t find it funny.

“Well couldn’t you give him another one?”

“Unless you want to see him in one of my tank tops then no.” The amusement slowly drifted away when you realised she wasn’t humouring you at all and she was being serious. “Why are you asking so many questions?”

She gave you a concerned look, like she expected the answer to be obvious but it only pissed you off more. Who the hell was she to judge who you liked?

Reading the look on your face, she instantly dropped the topic, not wanting to get into another argument with you, especially not sober. “Okay, fine. I won’t ask any questions.” She crossed her arms and leaned against the cupboard. “Are you at least going to school today? It started three hours ago.”

You shook your head. “I’m staying here with Ran today. You’ll be gone, right? For that job interview?”

“...yeah. My AA sponsor said I should start getting back on my feet.”

“Good.” You put your cereal bowl down. “I can stop carrying the household on my back and you can start doing your job as a mother,” you said sweetly, tilting your head condescendingly to the side. 

She returned your incredibly fake smile for a second and then sighed, dropping the act and returning back to concerned mother. “Skipping school for a boy though…? Is that really smart?”

You glared at her, pushing your side off the counter to stand in front of her. “Don’t start this. Not now. I’m happy, and he makes me happy. If you cared about me, you’d accept it. Hiro likes him too!”

She shook her head and took a deep breath, trying to come off as gentle yet firm. “You may think he makes you happy, but—”

“I think I know what I like mom. I’m eighteen! I’m not some child that doesn’t know what she’s doing.”

“You’re dating a guy that looks at least twenty—”

“I’m nineteen,” Ran called back from the living room, his eyes glued onto his phone. 

Your mother’s mouth closed shut as she ate down her words and you looked at her, waiting to see what bullshit she’d come up with next. She lowered her voice to a whisper, “I didn’t know he could hear us.”

“So?”

Your mother grabbed your hands and squeezed them reassuringly. “What you’re going through, baby, is what every teenage girl goes through at your age. It’s a phase.”

“It’s not a—fuck! Mom!”

“It is!! I went through the same thing at your age. Next thing you know I got knocked up by a—”  she lowered her voice to ensure Ran couldn’t hear this time, “a delinquent. And how do you think that turned out?” You shrugged your shoulders. “Exactly. He fucking left. Where else do you think your dad is right now?”

“I don’t care about that man. Ran is nothing like that. He actually cares about me. He got me a job, taught me things and even let’s me stay at his place when I don’t want to stay here.”

“Wait, you stay at his? Like live with him?” 

You nodded slowly. “The fact you don’t even know when I’m gone is concerning. What’s the problem anyway?I use protection if that’s what you’re so scared of—” 

“I just don’t want you fucking up your life like I did mine. Especially at your age. Okay?”

“Who said I’m—”  Your mother shushed you when your volume was starting to rise. You cleared your throat and spoke again, but more quietly, “who said I’m fucking my life up?”

“You’re literally skipping school!”

“It’s the first time! Just for today! It’s his only free day, okay? I dunno when I’ll be able to spend time with him again. Just let me have this. Please? I’ll catch up on my school work tomorrow. I promise.”

“He’s not a good influence, baby. You’re smart, you can do better than this.” 

“Are we done here?” You sighed, rubbing your temples in irritation. Your mother looked like she had more to say but closed her mouth and slowly shook her head. “Good.” You walked away from the kitchen, into the living room and flopped down on the couch next to Ran. 

You waited until your mother walked back up the stairs before turning to face Ran, putting your head on his shoulder.

 “Hey, pretty girl. You done arguing with your mother yet?” He said, attention fully on his phone and lifted his arm up to wrap around your shoulder, holding you tightly against his side. 

“Hiya,” you smiled and nuzzled your face in his chest, taking in his strong scent. “My mother thinks you’re a bad influence.”

“Can’t say I disagree,” he said, grinning. You playfully slapped his arm and he slid his hand down to your sides before lifting you up and to straddle his lap. 

“I’m sorry you had to hear that,” you said softly, lacing your arms behind his head and leaning down to peck him on the lips. “She’s just a hypocrite.”

“It’s fine baby. C’mere.” You shifted on his lap to rest your head against his shoulder. “You worry too much. Who cares what people think.”

“I don’t care. I just hate her fucking opinion. She always judges everything I do. Then once she starts drinking again she becomes the most irresponsible person on the planet, but expects me to be a saint? It’s so tiring.” 

Ran hummed and kissed your forehead. “Want me to make you feel better?”

You bit your lip and looked up at him before smiling. He tossed his phone on the opposite couch and flipped your positions, your back resting flat against the couch as he hovered over you. You erupted in a fit of giggles and laughter as he kissed his way down your stomach, making you squirm and squeal with excitement. The buzz of butterflies flew in your stomach as he kissed down your belly. Your shorts were short enough to show him the lace of your panties Mira helped you pick out during your shopping spree last week. You watched intently, bunching his long hair up and out of his face as his lips lingered close to your thighs. Your breath hitched as he stuck out his tongue, running it along the thin fabric, then licked a trail back up your body, to your face, kissing you deeply. 

Your mother watched from the staircase shaking her head in disappointment as she watched you fall for someone like him. She's had experience with guys like Ran, she knows what kind of monster they are deep down inside and knows exactly how they were. After all, she fucked around with a guy like that and got pregnant at 20. Your dad was a deadbeat, refusing to accept you as his own and left when you were four. Ever since that night, she's been drinking to cope with the loneliness, unable to function by herself after getting so attached to him. They'd be on and off for a couple years, and constantly get your hopes up that you'd be a happy family, but they just weren't meant to work out.

In all honesty, she would have loved for you to meet someone else, a nice guy who could give you a stable relationship, but that's impossible. In her eyes, Ran was bad news, he was all fun and games, but deep down he had no feelings for you other than lust. And once you fell for him, he would use you until he got bored and moved onto the next girl. She couldn't imagine why you would fall for him. But it was obvious how happy you are with him. So you can only hope that she was wrong. That maybe one day you will meet someone special, and not end up like her.

So she let out a heavy sigh, and went back upstairs. 

Present day.

It had been a week, and the phone Mikey gave you remained eerily silent, devoid of any notifications or messages. You spent the weekend at Shion’s house, keeping conversations to a minimum, only sharing faint smiles when he’d place his hand on your waist for a kiss. You weren’t in the mood, and you felt guilty for taking your sour mood on him, but the conversation with Dona and the plan Mikey and Sanzu formed had put a damper on your entire mood.

You hadn’t left Shion’s house either; instead, you laid on the bed, consumed by your thoughts about what you’d have to do with Mira. Your finger hovered over Mira’s contact for a few moments before you finally decided to get over yourself and text her.

You: MIRAA i missed you so much. Are you free anytime soon? 

You cringed at the text but sighed and hit send. Mira seemed likely to be busy, what with her engagement to the head of police, or chief of police? Frankly, you couldn’t be bothered to remember Naoto’s job title. While waiting for her response, you managed to clean both Shion’s bedroom and the living room. Boredom had driven you to it, there was nothing else for you to do anyway. 

Ran’s number remained blocked, even though you knew it wasn’t his fault that lackeys broke into Hiro’s house and beat him half to death like you thought initially. But at the end of the day, you still promised Hiro you’d stay away from Ran. It wasn’t as simple as it sounded, especially since the initial anger toward him had faded now that you knew the incident wasn’t planned, not even Mikey had been aware of it.

You were in the midst of wiping down the kitchen counters, earphones playing your favourite song in your eyes when your phone suddenly buzzed in your back pocket. The vibration startled you, and you hastily set the cleaning wipes aside. After drying your hands on the sides of your jeans, you grabbed your phone from your pocket.

Mira: HEY!!!!!!!!! ITS BEEN SO LONG I MISSED YOU SO MUCH :( SORRY BUT I’M BUSY ALL WEEK. I’M FREE THIS WEEKEND THOUGH. IS SATURDAY ALRIGHT?

You chewed the inside of your cheek, taking a moment to think. Next Saturday seems fine, but you feel by then it’ll have already been two weeks and you don’t want to wait too long before Mikey and Sanzu think you’re stalling. You brought out the burner phone in your dresser and unlocked it, pulling out Dona’s saved contact details and called her for advice.

You had a few questions on your mind to ask her. How long does it take to piss Mikey off, how many bodies does Sanzu have, how to quit this Bonten agreement with all your limbs and organs intact. It still angered you to even think about asking Dona, especially after the argument, but you had no other choice.

It seemed like the idea of talking to you pissed Dona off as well since she practically growled, “What the hell do you want?” the second she picked up the phone.

“Oh grow up, would you? This 8 year one sided grudge you have isn’t cute.”

“Did you think for a second that maybe it’s not a ‘one-sided grudge’ and I just genuinely don’t fucking like you?”

You rolled your eyes so far back in your head and settled down on the bed with a hefty sigh. “Cool. Anyway, are you free on Saturday?”

“...why?”

“Is it not fucking obvious why?” you snapped. There was a long silence on the other end before you groaned loudly. “Mira? The plan? The whole entire reason we’re even talking right now?”

“Oh. That. Can’t, sorry. I’m busy on Saturday.”

“Well that’s the only day Mira is available so clear up some damn room and cancel your plans.”

“I’ll think about it.” Dona said.

“‘Kay. Thank you D—” There was a beep and the disconnected sound blared in your eyes. “Bitch.” You tossed the burner back into the dresser with a thud and you quickly made sure you didn’t crack the screen. Inspection over, you grabbed your main phone and texted Mira saying you couldn’t wait to see her this weekend, smiling when she sent a string of emojis mixed with hearts and smiley faces before disappearing offline.

Your heart warmed knowing she hadn’t changed a single bit, always sending those same string of emojis whenever you both parted ways during texts. You left your phone on the bed, about to head back to the kitchen when your phone buzzed against the sheets. You picked up the phone, only to see there were no notifications. Confused, you looked around, remembering the burner phone and grabbed it. 

The phone only had 9 saved numbers: Mikey, Sanzu and Dona were the only ones that you knew of. You didn’t bother checking the rest. Pulling up the contacts, you saw the names of all the other executives: Ran, Rindou, Kokonoi, Takeomi, Mochizuki and Kakucho.

“Oh my god, Kaku,” you said to nobody but yourself. You were faintly acquainted with Kakucho, only saying hello and exchanging waves whenever you crossed paths, which wasn’t often either. You barely saw Ran’s friends back then except Rindou. 

You checked the recent messages on the burner. You couldn’t help but feel lightness in your chest when you saw the message was from Ran. 

Ran: so this is where you’ve been hiding

You smiled at the text, shifting onto your back on the bed and typed back a response. 

You: how did you find me

Ran: you forget who I work for?

You: oh. yeah makes sense

You: so what do you want

Ran: i miss you

You: u went 8 years without me. You’ll live

Ran: and I joined a criminal organisation, cut my hair short and dyed it pink and purple. What does that tell you

You: that I’m amazzzingggg

Ran: ik u are. 

Ran: come over tonight 

You: I can’t sorry. I made a promise that I can’t see u again

Ran: I would take that seriously if you didn’t make that same exact promise to ur mother ten years ago

Ran: and I still got u in my bed

You: …

You: fine. But I don’t want your drivers driving me around anymore. 

Ran: thought you would like the princess treatment 

You: no I don’t. You can help buy me a car tho?

Ran: ?

You: plsplsplsplspslspslssss

Ran: I’ll think about it

You: and I���ll see you tonight 

Ran: alright baby

“I’m back!” Shion called from the front door. 

You turned your phone off and entered the living room, approaching Shion from behind. You wrapped your arms around his waist, pulling him into a bear hug. He stumbled forward from the impact, taking a second to catch his footing before peeking behind his arm at your face dug into his back. “Aw, you missed me.”

He turned around and you let go of his waist, his hands rising to hold your face and plaster a wet sticky kiss on your forehead. 

“Ew, gross,” you mumbled, a hint of a playful smile on your lips as you wiped your hand over the leftover spit. He grumbled for you to shut up and walked over to the kitchen, opening the fridge door to examine its contents. “I’m not gonna be home on Saturday,” you said as you followed behind him.

“Really? Why?”

“I’m hanging out with Mira. A little reunion thing, you know?”

“That’s cute.” He pulled out the milk and opened it, sniffing it, then grimaced and tossed it in the trash. “But who the hell is Mira?”

“You really don’t remember her? Me, her and Dona?”

Shion removed his head from the fridge and looked at you and shrugged. “Oh wait.” He took a moment and you crossed your arms, waiting. “Oh! Her! Didn’t she have a crush on me?” he smirked.

You rolled your eyes. “She found you cute at first, then you got knocked out in a fight. Instant ick.”

His eyes narrowed. “That fight wasn’t fair and you know it. Nobody told Hanma to bring a goddamn bat.”

“Like you’d win if he didn’t have the bat—” You just about dodged the empty water bottle he tossed at you. You quickly grabbed it and threw it back in his direction. He swiftly swatted it away before it could hit him and you scoffed. “If only you could fight as good as you could dodg—”

“That’s it.” He picked you up by the legs and carried you over to the couch, ignoring your complaints which eventually turned into laughter when he set you onto the couch. He swatted away some cushions and pinned you against the surface. 

“You caught me off guard. That’s all.”

“Yeah okay.” He laughed and dipped his head down towards yours. You parted your lips when his tongue slid past your teeth, hot against your own. You giggled, closing your eyes as he nipped at your bottom lip. 

“Lemme borrow your car later,” you said in between kisses, wrapping your legs around his waist as he started nibbling at your neck.

“What?” he mumbled softly, breaking the kiss and looking down at you. “Fuck it’s been so long since I fucked you.”

“I said,'' you wound your arms around his neck. “Can you lemme borrow your car tonight?”

His eyes travelled down your body and his gaze lingered on the swell of your tits through your shirt for a moment before moving back up to your eyes when you purposefully moved your head to his eyeline. “Please?”

“Uh. What for?”

You shrugged and lolled your head back against the couch, your finger rising to wrap your finger around the silver chain dangling from his neck. “I just want to drive around. I’m bored. Please?”

“I mean sure…but—” You swiftly sat up and kissed his cheek as a distraction. His cheeks were flushed slightly and he bit down on his lower lip, a satisfied grin forming on his face when your lips slowly trailed from his cheeks to his lips, kissing him slowly and passionately, the way you know he likes it. 

You pulled away and brought his head down to your lips, whispering, “please?” into his ear. He groaned and kissed you one last time before thoroughly agreeing. “Thank you thank you thank you! Mwah.” You planted one more kiss on his lips before pushing him off of you and slipping off the couch.

~*~

“What exactly is this supposed to be?”

Ran shrugged, finished downing his drink and placed it back on the counter top before leaning forward to get a closer look at the little baggie you had in your hand. “Kokonoi gave it to me.”

“Yeah okay, but—” You let out a noise of doubt and put it back on the table. “I don’t trust it.”

“Since when were you a pussy?” 

You looked up at Ran and glared at the smug smile on his face. “I’m not a pussy Ran. I just don’t want to eat a random pill that you yourself said you don’t know what it's called!”

He rested his elbows on the marble countertop and his grin widened. “I took it earlier and I’m fine.”

“That’s because you barely have brain cells left to scramble.” You reached over the counter and ruffled his perfectly styled hair. “I’ll do it because I trust you.” You removed the pink pill from the baggie and held it up to your eyes, examining it cautiously. “If this kills me—”

“It won’t, you big baby. Eat it.”

You bit your lip and thought for a moment before looking back up at him. “Fine. Get me some water.”

“Just swallow it.”

You huffed, “I need some water to help. I can’t just swallow it.”

He looked at you, amused, and crossed his arms. “Why not?”

“Because! Ugh, shut up!” You put the pill back on the counter and stormed over to the cabinet, grabbing an empty glass, then to the tap to fill it with tap water. Ran laughed from his corner of the kitchen as he watched you stomp your way around his kitchen, like a storm. You turned to glare at him, his laugh only making you even more annoyed. “What the hell is so funny?”

“You,” he cackled again when your eyebrows furrowed deeper. “Your temper. It’s hilarious.”

“I don’t have a goddamn temper.”

“You explode at anything small. It’s cute.” He walked over towards you and booped your nose, the tip of his finger skirting down your cheek to your chin, lifting your face up to his eyeline. “You really haven’t changed a single bit. It’s reassuring.”

“Well, thanks.” You looked down at the glass of water with an uncertain look on your face. “This’ll get me high right?”

“Yeah.” You took a second for motivation and Ran moved to grab the pill off the counter. He returned in front of you, “Open your mouth.” He waited until your mouth was open before slotting the pill on the flat pink of your tongue. You brought the water up to your mouth and took a sip before digesting it. 

Thanks to the water, you couldn’t feel the full effects of the pill hitting you until a few hours later, you resting on top of Ran’s chest, drifting in and out of sleep. He had you locked tight around his arms, enjoying the warmth and weight of you atop of him. He felt you shuffle around, trying to get comfortable.  

“What car do you want?” Ran asked, looking down at your head resting against his chest. Your head was tucked under his chin, one arm wrapped around his waist as the other clutched onto his shirt. 

Your head felt heavy when you tried to lift it from his chest and squinted up at him. With the drugs running through your veins, everything looked brighter and crispier, colours seeming sharper than usual. It was hard to focus. “Ummm, what car?” you asked slowly.

Ran chuckled softly and leaned downwards, pressing his lips against your forehead. “The one you asked me to buy you.”

“Hm.” You sat up from his chest and straddled his lap. He slid his hands up your thighs to hold onto your hips. Your hands rested beside his head as you hazily looked down at him. “I wasn’t serious about that. You know?”

“Serious or not, I’ll buy it for you. Anything you want. Just tell me.”

“Really?” you smiled and bit your lip.

He shifted upwards, inching closer to your face, your nose brushing against his. “Anything you want.”

You couldn’t resist the close proximity anymore and dipped your head downwards, kissing him gently. You lifted one hand from the bed to rest on the side of his face. He pulled your hips closer, pressing you hard against his erection. The friction and the heat of his body against yours made you moan softly, which he eagerly swallowed up with each kiss. 

You could feel his cock begin to harden against your inner thigh and bit down on his lip before sucking it back into his mouth, relishing in the low groan he left out when you slowly pushed your hips back against his lap. Your hands gripped onto the pillow under him, digging your nails into the fabric as you latched your lips onto the skin of his neck, biting and sucking gently on the flesh. His hand skimmed past your thighs, along the curve of your ass and gripped it, squeezing whatever he could grab and groaned at the feeling of your soft lips against his skin, sucking softly.

You broke the kiss and licked down his neck. His skin tasted sweet and tangy, sending tingles throughout your entire body. 

Your world was flipped when he switched positions in the blink of an eye and hovered above you, gazing into your eyes with lust filled desire. You looped your arms around his neck and pulled him close, locking your lips together.You felt Ran’s hands slide across your leg and hitched it upwards to wrap around his waist, and you whimpered in response, your back arching as you let yourself loose around him.

“This okay?” he murmured softly against your lips as his hand slowly entered inside your jeans. You nodded vigorously and pulled him back down for a kiss, slipping your tongue desperately between his lips. The sheets got tangled beneath your bodies as you both kissed passionately. 

You pushed him onto his side, his hand lifting your thigh to rest over your leg. His fingers unzipped your jeans and helped you toss them off before lifting your thigh to rest over his leg, sliding his hand down to rest against your ass, his grip creating a heat wild enough within you and sending a jolt of electricity to your core.

With every inch of his body pressed against you, you couldn’t help but moan. “Fuck me please Ran. I need it.”

Ran hummed deeply against your lips and pushed you onto your back. He knelt between your legs and you giggled as he parted them open with his big hands. You reached downwards, his fingers teasing the waistband of his pants and you helped him push it down and off his hips. You grabbed his cock, the tip wet with pre and positioned it by your entrance. He braced his hands beside your head, his forehead touching yours as your pussy twitched when he moved closer to you, trailing kisses along your neck.

“Oh fuck,” you gasped, closing your eyes shut when you felt his cock slowly enter you. “Fuck fuck fuck oh my god.” You dug your fingers into his shoulder blades and arched your back, feeling the head slide past your barrier, stretching you out.

“Almost there baby.” He kept thrusting slowly, taking his time and going further inside of you with each stroke. You cried out loud, louder than before, moaning constantly as he pushed himself deeper into you. “God, you’re so tight.” He groaned out your name and your body shivered at the raspiness of his voice.

“More,” you panted desperately, your eyes meeting his gaze for the first time since entering you. 

He snapped his hips forward, filling you completely and pulled all the way out, his cock wet with your juices before fucking back into you. The heat of his skin searing your walls as you sank your nails into his shoulders. His lips found yours again, soft and warm. Your fingertips flipped across his back and you felt his cock throb within you. Each thrust had you clenching around him, clutching him tight to your body as he fucked you with slow, methodical strokes.

You tossed your head back, panting and crying out, clutching onto his hair, the back of his shirt, anything you could possibly muster. 

“Arms up baby,” he ordered and sat back, his cock still warming your sides. His hands held onto your hips, digging into the soft flesh as you shrugged your shirt off, reaching behind your back to unclasp your bra and toss it off the bed. It landed into a sorry puddle on the floor along with your shirt and Ran’s jeans, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care, not when you looked back and saw Ran in the middle of shedding his shirt off. 

“I always loved this tattoo,” you giggled, running your arms along the pattern before bringing him back down to your level, arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him down for another steamy kiss. 

You spread your legs wider apart and pressed down on his lower back to get him deeper inside you. His mouth travelled to your breasts where he started sucking on your nipples, biting down softly and nibbling on them. He slipped his hand beneath your body and grasped your clit, rubbing lightly in circles causing you to gasp loudly. You came apart in his arms, shattering into pieces and screaming his name in his ear. He pumped faster and harder, his hips slamming against yours as you tightened around his cock once more. His climax shot through him, thrusting every inch of his cum spilling inside of you. Every drop was heaven, you felt yourself tighten up once more and seconds later your orgasm arrived, intensifying everything. You dripped on his cock and held onto him so tight you swore there were permanent nail marks on the bone of his shoulder.

He pulled out and collapsed beside you, breathing heavily. Your muscles relaxed slightly and your eyes fluttered closed as he pulled you to lay close against him. He kissed your neck softly, stroking your thighs with his hands. 

“You alright?” he asked quietly.

“Mmmm. I’m amazing,” you hummed in agreement, resting your head against his chest and nuzzling against him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you. “I really missed you Ran.”

His eyes traced your face and he saw the genuinity in your eyes. “Me too baby.” He smiled softly and his hands slid down your bare back and cupped your ass, pulling you tighter against him. “Missed this too.”

He leaned in and kissed you on the lips. Anything you had to say melted away as you indulged in him, humming softly into his mouth before pulling away. 

~*~

The supermarket was busy and bustling as Mira walked through the aisles with her shopping cart. She had a whole list ready and was looking for the dairy aisle when she bumped into someone’s cart. “Sorry!” she apologised and gasped when she looked up and saw who it was. “Dona?”

Dona smiled at her and waved, putting her basket on the floor as Mira practically pounced on her, pulling her into a suffocating hug. 

“I thought I’d never see you again! What the hell?!” Mira pulled away and rested her hands on Dona’s shoulders, practically buzzing with excitement. “You look so good!”

“Oh stop,” Dona pushed her hands off her shoulders. “You’re still so damn energetic, it’s crazy.” She put her hands in her pocket. “What’s up though. What’re you shopping for?”

“Oh this stupid party Naoto wants me to host for his cop buddies.” Mira sighed and walked back to her cart. “I love Naoto but fuck, those damn cops are so annoying.”

“Really?” Dona asked, grabbing her shopping list. “Wouldn’t expect nothing more from a buncha cops. I’m surprised you’re even with one to be honest. Thought you hated them.”

“I do!” Mira said, hiding her face behind her hands while laughing. “No but Naoto’s…different.”

Dona stared blankly at her. “Different…?”

“Yeah! He’s not like those backwards, misogynistic asshole cops. He’s so sweet and treats me like a queen and he’s so sweet! Oh my god! He does this cute thing in the mornings and brushes my hair out of my face and whispers “good morning beautiful” in my ear every morning. I pretend I’m asleep just so I can hear him say it and he kisses me goodbye before work and—”

“Okay I get it! Sheesh, rub in your relationship more in my face would you?” Dona sighed and picked up her basket, following next to Mira as she began walking with her trolley. 

“I can’t believe you’re still single! Guess he really broke your heart, huh?”

“Don’t even talk about him right now. Fuck Shuji. That fucking asshole.”

Mira laughed. “That was like what, ten years ago? You need to let that go.”

“I’m trying! Okay?! But my minds been occupied with…stuff.”

Mira stopped by the meat aisle and began searching for some chicken breast. “Stuff or someone?”

“Someone as in a boy?” Dona asked and Mira nodded, checking the back of the package before dumping it into the trolley. “No, I'm not seeing someone.”

“You should.”

“I’m good.”

“You used to be so boy crazy! What happened?”

Dona shrugged and looked down at the floor for a short moment, biting the soft tissue of her cheek. “I just grew up I guess. Anyway, this party thing. When is it?”

“Tomorrow night. I have to cook for a bunch of weirdo cops. Not looking forward to it.” Mira paused for a moment and then gasped. “You should come with me!”

Dona blinked at her. “What?”

“Yes! Oh my god please please please. I’ll need someone to keep me company.” She clung onto Dona’s arms as she begged. “I’m so sick of all the other cops' wives. They’re all judgemental and yucky and like three times my age. Definitely jealous of my youth.”

Dona laughed and Mira pouted, hoping it’ll be enough to convince her. With a final sigh, Dona finally gave in. “Fine. But only for two hours. I have work.”

“Really? What do you work as?”

“I uh…it’s complicated.”

“At least you have a job. I’m just known as Naoto’s wife and stay at home all day. Maybe I could come visit you on your free days?”

“It’s oof.” Dona thought about it for a moment. “I can take you to a club I work at whenever you’re free. Sometimes we gamble and stuff. You wanna join?”

“Gambling…? I thought that was illegal.”

“Never stopped us back in the day.” Dona winked, playing around and watched the conflict flicker all over her face. “It’ll be a little secret. You don’t have to tell Naoto anything.”

“Of course I won’t! I may be marrying a cop but I’m not a snitch. Especially on my best friend. I’m just worried about what Naoto would think about me going to a gambling club. He’d definitely lock the place up, haha.”

Dona rolled her eyes. “You don’t have to tell him anything. You’re allowed to have secrets.”

“Legal secrets, yeah.”

“Come onnnnnnnnn. Join me! It’ll be fun, I promise. I’ll even invite (Name) over.”

Mira’s face lit up even more. “Really?! She can come!?

“She fuckin’ better come.” 

“Oh my god the gang's back together!” Mira chirped and jumped before pulling Dona into a big hug. “I can’t wait! Lemme go text (Name) right now!”

“You go do that.” Dona checked her phone. “I gotta go anyway. My boss wants me to clock in now.” She pulled Mira in for another hug. “I’ll see you as soon as I can, okay.”

“Okay, bye bye!”

When Dona left the store, she quickly typed a message to you before entering her car and driving off.

~*~

“Are you busy tomorrow?” you asked hesitantly.

Ran laughed softly. “I’m working tomorrow. Probably be gone for most of the day.” He shifted onto his back and laced his arms behind his head. You propped yourself onto your side and frowned. “What’s wrong baby.”

You shrugged and looked downwards at the mattress, speaking in a quiet voice. “I dunno, I'm just lonely. And bored. I don’t really have anything to do lately.”

He ran his thumb down your cheekbone. “You wanna come with me?”

“Depends. Do I have to witness a murder?”

He grinned widely. “If everything goes well tomorrow night then there’ll be no murder.”

You snorted. “So there’s still a possibility, huh?”

“People die everyday,” he mused and you looked at him with a serious face, pursing your lips together and he sighed. “Fine. Fine. Even if things go to shit tomorrow I promise I won’t kill anybody. I’ll…think of other things.”

“Good enough for me.” You leaned in to kiss him again but stopped short when your phone buzzed. You groaned and reached behind you, fumbling for it on the dresser, bringing it up and reading the text from Mira and Dona. 

Mira: I RAN INTO DONA AT THE SUPERMARKET AND SHE WANTS TO HANG OUT TOMORROW!!!! ARE YOU FREE?

Dona: got mira to come to the club. Be there tomorrow at 7

“Oh fuck,” you muttered under your breath. 

“What’s wrong?” Ran leaned his head on your shoulder and read the text message. 

“Guess I won’t be following you to work tomorrow then,” you said, turning your phone off. You looked over at the heavyweight on your shoulder and rested your head against his. “I’m seeing Mira tomorrow. So I guess you know what that means?”

“Is this about that stupid plan you made with Sanzu?” He asked, pulling away from your head, reaching inside his drawer for a cigarette. You nodded and watched him light the end and shifted back on the bed, bringing the covers over your naked body to cover you. 

“You know about that plan?”

“Little bit.” He lit the cigarette and tossed the lighter back into the drawer. “If it’s not affecting me or any of my business, I don’t care enough to ask more.”

“It’s not affecting you? This Naoto dude?” you asked, trying to get a bigger picture.

“I mean he is, but I’m careful. He’s not catching me anytime soon.”

“Still cocky as ever huh,” you said and he grinned widely around his cigarette. “Anyway I hate the plan a lot. But it's for Hiro's benefit and I’m willing to do anything for him. Even if it means fucking up Mira’s marriage and her fiance’s career forever.”

Ran could feel like there was something up with you and eyed you for a moment. To anyone it was clear the plan was bugging you and as much as you tried acting cool about it, he could tell the guilt was slowly eating you inside. He exhaled cigarette smoke out before putting it on the ashtray beside his bed, shifting back against the bedframe and opened his arms for you to fit in. “C’mere.”

You looked at him and his open arms and shifted forward, crawling the distance between you both and rested between his arms. He enclosed them around you, the side of his face resting against your forehead.

“Do you need some advice from me or want me to shut up and stay silent?” he asked for a moment.

You let out a silent laugh and nodded. “Advice please.”

“Okay.” He cleared his throat and began speaking. “Sometimes in life you gotta do bad shit. Even if you don’t wanna.” He finished talking and you waited a couple seconds for him to continue. 

You were confused when he unwrapped his arms around you and slid off the bed, putting his boxers back on and stretching. 

“What the hell? Is that it Ran?”

“Yeah.” He walked over to his closet and began rummaging for tomorrow’s outfit.

“What kind of advice was that?!” You groaned, stopping your eyes from rolling back. “Sometimes I forget how useless you are.”

“Temper baby,” he responded back, flicking through the range of suits and blazers hung in his closet. You took a moment to admire his closet, impressed with his collection of suits, ranging in different colours and couldn’t help but imagine anybody but Ran pulling it off.

He found an old dress hung up and tossed it in your direction. “Try this shit on for me.” 

The dress landed on your face and you grimaced and pulled it off. Holding it up in the air, you examined it, front to back. “Why the hell do you even have a dress? It’s so small it can’t even fit me!”

“Some girl must’ve left it over,” he said casually, picking out a purple form fitting suit from the hanger and left it on the edge of his bed. All forms of amusement on your face slowly melted at the mention of another girl and you deadpanned in his direction, but he missed it as he began changing back into his clothes. “Does it fit you?” he asked, fitting his shirt over his head.

“Don’t tell me you expect me to wear this? I’m not wearing some recycled dress.”

“You want me to buy you a new dress?” he asked, looking at you.

“Duh.”

He knelt down on the edge of the bed and grabbed the dress, tossing it towards the end of the bed. Your complaint was cut short when he grabbed your ankle and tugged, successfully tipping your back onto the mattress as he inched forwards, climbing over you. His hands laced between yours and you looked up at him, wide eyed. 

“I wonder what it’ll take to get rid of this attitude of yours, hm.” You tried to struggle out of his grip but your attempts were pointless. 

“I don’t have an attitude.”

“Yeah you do. Now ask nicely and I’ll get you what you want.”

You bit down on your tongue and swallowed your pride before lowering your voice to a whisper. “Can you buy me a dress?”

“Can’t hear youuu,” he leaned his ear down lower to your mouth to hear better. “Use your words.”

“You heard me. I’m not saying it again.”

He pulled away and stood up from the bed. “Baby steps. But fine. I’ll take you shopping tomorrow.”

“Not tomorrow. I’m busy.”

“When are you free then?”

“Any day that’s not tomorrow.” You stood up from the bed. “But I’ll probably have to see you tomorrow if you’re going to be at the club Dona sent me.”

“Maybe.” He pulled you closer for a hug. Your arms wrapped around his midsection and you dug your face in his chest, enjoying how big and warm he was. 

“Can I stay over tonight?” you asked after a moment, looking up at him. 

“You’re gonna be home alone though. I’m not coming back till late.”

“How late?” He pulled his arms away from you. “Dunno. Maybe three? Four?”

“Jesus what the hell do you do all day?”

“Don’t worry.” He booped your nose and you scrunched it in response. “Get some sleep okay? I can see your damn eye bags.”

“Fine. Goodnight and thanks for letting me stay.” You got into bed, grabbing the big warm sheets and covering your whole body. 

“Anytime baby.”

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[anonymousewrites]

One Hell of a Love (Book 2) Chapter Twenty-Five

Sebastian Michaelis x Demon! Reader

Chapter Twenty-Five: One Hell of a Confession

Summary: As the Campania sinks, (Y/N) and Sebastian face the remaining reanimated corpses.

            As the Campania fell into two pieces, (Y/N) and Sebastian leapt out of the ship pieces. Ciel clung to Sebastian, and the demons ran up the deck of the ship to the tip of the bow.

            “It does not seem that the bow here will hold for long either!” said Sebastian over the roar of the sinking ship breaking apart.

            “Sebastian!” (Y/N) tossed him a lifesaver.

            He stuck it onto Ciel, who gaped in surprise. “Take a deep breath,” said Sebastian.

            “Eh?! Wha—?!” Ciel stammered.

            “The situation being what it is, please do forgive me!” Sebastian lifted Ciel above his head.

            “What are you do—Aaah!” Ciel cried out as Sebastian through him into the air.

            Water. It just has to be water. (Y/N) took a deep breath and leapt from the bow of the Campania as it fell underwater.

            The chill of water instantly seeped into them, and if they weren’t a demon, the iciness would be paralyzing. Sebastian was beside them beneath the water and nodded to a lower lifeboat that hadn’t been lowered. They swam lower and grabbed the boat. Sebastian grabbed the other end, and they pulled it to the surface. Sebastian broke away and grabbed Ciel as he slipped below the waves. (Y/N) pushed the boat onto the water, and Sebastian tossed Ciel inside. The Earl coughed and shivered.

            “Please put this on,” said Sebastian, tossing his tailcoat to Ciel. “I do apologize that I cannot prepare some hot tea for you.”

            Screams and cries for help pierced the night, and the three glanced over to see the people that hadn’t escaped to the lifeboats in time fighting each other to keep on the surface, nearly tearing each other apart.

            “We’ll be dragged down if we go there,” said (Y/N), resting on the side of the boat.

            “Let us depart,” said Sebastian.

            The demons tired, bloody, pained demons pushed the boat away from the wreckage and towards the other lifeboats. Ciel sat listlessly in the boat, holding himself tight and shivering. His eyes drooped.

            “Young Master!” warned (Y/N).

            Sebastian called out in alarm, “You must not fall asle—!” A sharp pull on his leg had his head snapping back. A bizarre doll had his leg in its grasp and was opening its jaw. It snapped closed, and Sebastian kicked it away as it tore into him.

            “These things can move in the water?!” cried Ciel. That has snapped him out of his daze.

            “Since they do not need to breathe, it would follow that they also do not drown,” said Sebastian.

            “That means—Mph!”

            (Y/N) covered Ciel’s mouth. “Hush. I hear something.”

            All around the lifeboat, bubbles broke the surface of the ocean.

            “Don’t tell me…” breathed Ciel.

            Hundreds of heads broke the surface. Bizarre dolls were moving towards them from every direction.

            “These are all—?!” Ciel couldn’t finish the thought.

            “Get in!” said (Y/N), grabbing Sebastian and pushing him up. He pulled them up behind him protectively.

            A moment later, the bizarre dolls were climbing for them. Sebastian grabbed an oar and slammed through several skulls. (Y/N) grabbed the other and smashed some more heads.

            “Just how many of them are there?!” cried Ciel.

            “I cannot say…however they will likely only search for souls until their bodies are no more,” said Sebastian grimly.

            “And that means you are the sole living human in this vicinity,” said (Y/N).

            Ciel looked between the swarm of bizarre dolls and the faint lights of the lifeboats. “Then…we can’t run. If we do, Lizzie and the other survivors will be targeted. We can’t expose them to danger.” (Y/N) and Sebastian defended the boat from the next group of attackers. “Call it good fortune or ill, they seem only to attack the soul nearest to them! We will stop them here! You can do it, can’t you, Sebastian, (Y/N)?”

“(Y/N)?” said Sebastian.

            “I’m with you until the end,” said (Y/N).

            Sebastian smirked and glanced at Ciel. “You do not need to ask your servant,” he said. “Simply command what you will of me.”

            “I command you!” said Ciel, exposing his contract seal. “Exterminate them!”

            Together, (Y/N) and Sebastian spoke. “Yes, my Lord!”

            Sebastian slammed through a group of bizarre dolls. “We will pitch around a bit!”

            “Hang on to the boat!” said (Y/N), spinning and striking behind Ciel.

            The demons showed their true colors, keeping balance on the waves as they whirled and struck and smashed skulls, blood splattering over them. Around them, countless bizarre dolls swam forward.

            It was going to be a long night.

l

            “I-Is it over?” Ciel glanced up from where he was curled on the bottom of the lifeboat. The tinges of sunlight were finally streaking the sky.

            “Yes…” (Y/N) swayed and collapsed to their side.

            “(Y/N)!” Sebastian went to their side, but he stumbled and fell to his knees.

            Ciel’s eyes widened as he saw the demons that were usually so calm and collected feel pain and injury. “Sebastian? (Y/N)?”

            “The blow of the Death Scythe was…hard, even for us,” said Sebastian, panting. (Y/N) groaned in agreement, leaning their head back in exhaustion. Sebastian’s hand unconsciously reached out to them and lay on their arm in silent comfort.

            Ciel looked down and gazed at the lockets in his hand. “Undertaker…what on Earth was he after…?”

            “I have no idea,” said (Y/N). “But as long as you keep that chain of lockets, I’m sure you’ll see him again.”

            “He seemed to have no intention of harming you, Young Master, but personally, we could do without the reunion,” said Sebastian. He coughed up blood, and (Y/N) uselessly tried to sit up to attend him. They curled up onto their side, clutching their wound.

            “This is the first time I’ve seen you two in such states,” said Ciel.

            “Pardon us for being so ungraceful,” said (Y/N). “Unfortunately, we did sustain a few injuries. Next time, we’ll be more efficient as Phantomhive servants.”

            Ciel scoffed fondly and looked up. His eyes widened. “A rescue boat.” A proper ship was sailing towards them. They were saved. “I can’t afford to have servants of the Phantomhive family stay in that state forever. Make sure you rest up when we return to the manor. You did well tonight.”

            Sebastian and (Y/N)’s eyes widened in surprise at the praise.

            “Young Master…” Sebastian smiled. “Please stop. I cannot believe I am hearing you say these words.”

            “I’d prefer to not deal with another crisis today,” said (Y/N) tiredly, head leaning to the side. With Sebastian’s hand on their arm, they rested their hand on his leg and waited for the ship to arrive.

l

            (Y/N) sighed as they stretched, finally alone in the room provided by the rescue boat. Their wounds ached as they repaired themselves, but there was nothing (Y/N) could do but use the towel provided to wipe away the blood on their skin and clothes.

            A knock at their door sounded, and (Y/N) breathed in relief as they felt Sebastian’s energy. They opened the door, and Sebastian stepped in.

            “How is the Young Master?” said (Y/N).

            “Recovering from his bout in the cold,” said Sebastian. “The doctors deemed he simply needed rest, so I am giving it to him.”

            “We deserve rest after everything we went through,” sighed (Y/N).

            “It is not my place as a servant to request such a thing, but I admit that I agree,” said Sebastian.

            “Well, if you’re looking to avoid rest, don’t come to me. I intend on taking it after everything I went for,” said (Y/N), stretching and wincing as their wound pulled as it sewed itself together.

            Sebastian’s eyes flicked to the tear in their uniform and the injury it revealed. He felt a tide of worry for (Y/N)’s condition and anger at Undertaker rise within him. He forced his gaze back to their eyes. “Yes…everything you went through.”

            (Y/N) knew him well enough to sense the undertone in his words. “Yes, Sebastian, everything I went through in this life and the last. I didn’t enjoy reliving it in the slightest.” Their eyes narrowed and flashed fuchsia. “If I am to share my past and truths of my human life, then I want to on my own terms. Not forced out of me by some reaper trying to kill me.”

            Sebastian chuckled.

            (Y/N) paused and looked at him. “What’s so amusing?”

            “The fact that you believe I care for your human life,” said Sebastian. “You hide it because you feel the perception of your demonic self now will be tainted by the being you were then.” He leaned towards them. “But I do not care. I saw a strong witch in your memories, and I see a powerful demon now.”

            (Y/N) blinked at the intensity. “You don’t care?” You don’t care that I was once a witch playing with magic, a human with no true power when it came to the eve of their death, helpless?

            “I do not. Not about the difference in your power between your mortal life and your immortal one,” said Sebastian. His eyes darkened. “No, I care for the fact I nearly saw your death come again.” He reached out and brushed a hand across the skin showing in the ripped dress, tracing over the exposed skin as it finished repairing itself. “I care for the fact I almost lost you.” The hand at their stomach smoothed across their waist, and his other hand raised. Sebastian was nearly caressing their face, hovering but a centimeter above their skin. “I cannot lose you. I refuse to. Not to humans, reapers, demons, or any other creature.”

            “Corvus…” (Y/N) spoke softly, invitingly. To hear such words from the demon they loved…they nearly couldn’t bear it.

            “Dear Felis,” murmured Sebastian. “To see your blood…I could hardly bear it.”

            (Y/N) reached up and cupped his hand, pressing it to their cheek. “And I couldn’t bear the blood you spilled. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you.” They gazed into his eyes and spoke the words that rested for so long on their heart. “I love you, Corvus.”

            Sebastian was silent for a moment, and then… “Say it again.”

            “I love you.”

            Sebastian pulled them to him and kissed them. He cupped their jaw and tugged their waist closer, pouring all his emotions into his act before leaning his forehead against theirs as they panted. His fuchsia eyes gazed into their catlike ones.

            “I love you, Felis.”

            (Y/N) pulled him back into a kiss at the words, the two stepping backwards. (Y/N) hit the edge of the bed and leaned back, and Sebastian pushed on top.

            “Dear, dear Felis.” He kissed down their neck. “Dear, foolish, stubborn Felis, running into danger for a demon like me.”

            (Y/N) sighed at the feeling of his canines scraping along their neck and tilted their head. “Dear Corvus, foolish enough to love a demon like you.”

            Sebastian smirked. “Then allow this demon to show just how he foolish he is.” He pulled back and gazed at them, raking over their appearance partly beneath him. “I have imagined this moment vividly.”

            “As have I.” (Y/N) smirked coyly and leaned back, dragging a hand up their side and sliding their skirts up to reveal their legs. “Who should show who?”

            “We have all night,” said Sebastian. “I’m sure both of us have an opportunity to show their love precisely what they’ve imagined.”

            “Then what are you waiting for, Corvus?” (Y/N)’s voice was a purr. “I love you.”

            An invitation.

            Sebastian smirked. He’d take it.

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[staygoldfics]

They See Right Through Me

Summary: Darry's only sixteen when his parents die, and after two years in the foster care system he makes it his goal in life to bring both of his brother's home. But what happens when Sodapop has spent his time in the system on the west side? And what happens when Ponyboy spent his time in the system in New York?

Chapter One: I Remember It All Too Well

Warnings: Very lightly mentioned hitting/abuse, lightly mentioned bruises and cuts. If I forgot anything, please let me know.

You can also find this on AO3

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Darry hasn’t known much since the night his parents died, his life since has been a whirlwind of nothingness, a vacuum in space pulling him in and suffocating him. He’s only had one goal in mind since his sixteenth birthday, get his brothers home, keep his family together.

People told him he was lucky after they died, lucky because a kind couple in Tulsa had heard the news of his parents passing and wanted to take him in for the next two years, let him finish high school in the same place he’d grown up. They couldn’t take in his brothers, could hardly even care for him, not that they really tried. Their home was safe and warm, but they never cared much for him, only his grades, football and him keeping out of trouble. They said he was lucky when Sodapop got a placement on the west side, close enough to see each other at school and when Darry wasn’t busy working and Soda’s foster parents weren't parading him around town to show off what a good deed, they were doing by taking him in. They were lucky cause Soda’s foster father only hit him occasionally, lucky because he still had food on his plate and a place to sleep at night.

People tell Darry he’s lucky because he’s smart, a good football player, because once he turns eighteen, he has an out if he’s smart enough to take it. College waits for him, or at least that’s what Sodapop says when they sit in the lot together, looking up at the sky. There’s dirt covering the light blue polo shirt Sodapop wears, Darry has to walk him to the border between the east and west side to keep him from getting jumped, and then have Paul walk Soda back to his foster parents. Soda doesn’t look like a greaser anymore but he sure as hell ain’t a soc, he’s not safe on either side of town anymore.

Darry doesn’t feel lucky when he applies for colleges to keep everyone off his back and then throws away his acceptance letters. Doesn’t feel lucky when he visits his parents grave alone and wonders how the hell, he’s supposed to fill shoes that could never be his size. Doesn’t feel lucky when he patches up Sodapop’s bruises and cuts and holds his brother as he sobs.

Darry remembers the day the state separated them like it was yesterday, has nightmares almost every night of the feeling of his baby brothers being pulled out of his arms. Sodapop at only 12 had been screaming, he was always the most emotional, always the loudest.

“Get away from me!” Soda had yelled, fists flying into their social worker, Miss.Cowell's arms. Darry was the only one not crying, his eyes were trained solely on Ponyboy, the ten-year-old was shaking like a leaf in his arms, silent tears rolling down his cheeks. “Darry! Stop! Let go!” Sodapop had been the first to be pulled away from their childhood home.

Darry hadn’t been willing to let go when a different social worker, Mr.Fisher had stepped forward. “Come on Ponyboy, say goodbye, it’s time to go.” Pony had his arms wrapped so tightly around Darry’s middle the oldest could hardly breathe. He’d cried silently into Darry’s shoulder, and after only a minute of silence Fisher had stepped forward, wrapping his arms around Ponyboy’s middle, trying forcefully to take him out of Darry’s arms. It was a silent struggle besides Fisher’s repeated “Let go now boys.”

Darry swears it took at least twenty minutes for them to rip Ponyboy out of his arms, the struggle had felt like it lasted hours. As Ponyboy was dragged away, sobbing so hard Darry wondered how the boy was even breathing, he dropped his favorite bunny plushie, Boots. For years it was the only piece Darry and Sodapop had left of their baby brother. Darry didn’t cry until late that night, alone in a room that would never be his.

Darry spent the next two years going to school and working as much as he possibly could, saving every cent with a promise to get both of his brothers home the moment he turned eighteen. On his eighteenth birthday, only two months before graduation, he moved back into his childhood home, saved by the state and his parents life insurance. He hadn’t shed a single tear as he cleaned the thick layer of dust off everything in the home, as he avoided looking up at the pictures hung loosely on the walls, as he set Boots down carefully on Sodapop’s old bed. Darry got a full-time job roofing houses, graduated early and three weeks later he started the process of bringing his brother’s home.

It was time consuming to say the least, the constant home visits and paperwork, not to mention the cost of the court visits. The most ridiculous part in his opinion were the two months of supervised visits and overnight stays he’d had with Sodapop. As if they didn’t spend every spare moment they could together. But that was the deal, the state wanted him to get Sodapop home first, to make sure he could handle the responsibility before he could bring Ponyboy home.

Sodapop is halfway to 15 when Darry finally brings him home, bruised and tired but still wearing a smile brighter than the sun. On Soda’s 16th birthday Darry isn’t able to give him much, but what he can give is a small party with the gang, Steve, Two-bit and Johnny. Darry makes chocolate cake that is devoured in seconds, and carefully wraps a gold chain from their mother’s jewelry box in an old newspaper.

Sodapop already has tears in his eyes, hands carefully holding the gold chain, when Darry delivers the news, his biggest present. “Ponyboy is coming home Soda.”

There’s a pause, everyone’s eyes on Sodapop, and then suddenly Soda is slamming into Darry, arms wrapped tightly around his older brother, his shoulders shaking with quiet sobs. Darry holds his baby brother just as tight, running his fingers through Soda’s greased hair as he continues. “We’re skipping the supervised visits, since Pony’s placement is so far away, they're letting us go straight to weekend stays. Miss.Cowel says if all goes well then it should only be a month before he gets to come home permanently.”

Darry and Soda spend the next two weeks getting the house ready for their brother to come home. Which leads them to now. Darry doesn’t know much, hasn’t since his parents died. But he knows the 13-year-old kid in front of him is not his kid brother. This boy's eyes are too cold, gray storm clouds glare at him underneath bangs that are a little too long and covered in a thick layer of grease. The kid has his hands shoved deep into the pockets of an oversized leather jacket, there’s bruises blooming along the boy’s jawline, his left eye is red and surrounded by black and blue. The kid's shoulders are hunched, his jaw clenched, he looks ready for a fight.

There’s an awkward silence as Darry, Soda, Miss.Cowel and Ponyboy all stand on the Curtis front porch on a sunny Friday afternoon. Darry isn’t sure what he was expecting to happen when he finally saw his kid brother again, but tense silence hadn’t been something he prepared for. Miss.Cowel, never one for wasting time, hands over a trash bag that doesn’t even look half full. Darry feels like throwing up when he realizes this bag is Ponyboy’s things. “I’ll be back to pick him up on Sunday.” She says and then without another word she leaves the brothers alone, Darry watches as her car disappears down the street and wonders how anyone could ever think he was lucky.

Sodapop is the first to speak and Darry doesn’t need to look at his brother to know he’s on the verge of tears. “Pony?” Soda steps closer, reaching out for their baby brother. Darry’s fist tightens around the trash bag when he looks back at his kid brother just in time to watch as Ponyboy flinches away. Sodapop’s hand freezes between them and then drops lamely to his side, the kids’ hands are shaking. “Baby what happened to you?” Soda tries again voice hardly above a whisper.

Darry’s suspicion that this is absolutely not his brother is confirmed when the boy rolls his eyes and in a thick New York accent he responds. “I ain’t a baby.”

[midnight1199]

Fated To Meet You

PAIRING: Jake Sully x Reader

WARNINGS:slight!angst, avatar!reader, fem!reader, AU, happy!ending hopefully, not beta read, mild swearing

NOTES: Hello lovelies, let me begin with how sorry I am for the delay in posting. I'm still trying to figure out a schedule, so please be patient as I work some things out. As of now, we're still on track with the movies with just minor changes in plot. I completely forgot to add translations in the last chapter sooo here you go, end notes with translations! Hope you like this next installment, I can't wait to hear your thoughts!

SUMMARY: The first time you saw him, you felt pity for him—Jake. Maybe that was the spark that would lead to the inferno of feelings you would hold until your last breath on Pandora.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

The link room looked exactly like the rest of Hell’s Gate, an amalgamation of mechanical greys and hospital room whites. Coffin-like pods lined the walls of the circular room with a round desk and chairs in the middle; holographic screens flashed data and live feed from the inside of the link pods. Scientists were running to and fro between one link pod and the other. Grace was already in the link room by the time you had arrived, cigarette in hand. Max signals the three of you toward your respective pods, starting with Norm.

“So how much time have you logged?”, Grace turns to Norm but you’re sure this question carries for both Jake and you as well.

“Uh, about five hundred twenty hours.”

“That’s good”, she motions to the first pod to Norm, “You go over there”. You see her turning towards you, “How about you, L/N?” "Roughly three hundred hours”, you respond. Grace hums lightly and motions to the pod next to Norm’s. A scientist is standing near the computer next to the pod waiting to calibrate you to your Avatar— decanted and ready for the neuro link. You head towards your pod and distantly you can hear the same question repeated to Jake, but you don’t end up catching his response, though you assume it wouldn’t be something Grace would be happy with.

You run your hand over the gel bed and press a finger in, the squishiness of it takes you aback a bit. “That’s gonna take getting used to”, you mutter. A giggle reaches your ears, and you look up to see your link tech smiling at you in amusement. Blushing lightly, you quickly gather yourself and lie down in the link pod. Both Norm and Jake do the same, with Jake snapping at Grace as she moves to help him. You pull the attached brace over your torso as the link tech steps in to attach and check the neural sensors to your forehead.

“Ready?”, she asks.

“Ready.”, you shoot her a thumbs up. The pod lid is closed on you, and you can’t help but compare it to the inside of a coffin, although your training has you used to the sensation, it still feels eerie nonetheless. Inhaling deeply, you close your eyes. The world behind your eyelids erupts into colours and the next thing you know you’re overloaded with a cacophony of voices, and the light in the room is entirely too bright for you. Blinking slowly, you see two med techs speaking something to you, you open your mouth to respond and are surprised to find how grainy and dry it feels. “Sorry guys didn’t catch that”, you smile sheepishly. You feel your ears flick on your head and wow doesn’t that sound weird.

You sit up slowly on the gurney and swing your legs down, on either side of you lie Norm and Jake. Though Norm, it seems, has been awake before you and is well into getting his motor functions tested. A commotion from the right of you drags your attention to Jake and it is not a moment later that you see his bare ass disappear through the now-open lab door as alarms start blaring all around you. Scrambling to your feet, you stumble along behind him. “I’ll bring him back, I promise!”, you exclaim to the med techs as you race after Jake. You feel your tail swinging to balance you as you run after the blue Marine. Naked feet digging into the dirt, you nearly bowl over a few avatars in your haste to catch up to Jake. The man is still as you approach him but turns around as you get closer. The laugh that he lets out as he turns to you makes your heart stutter, makes you stop in your tracks, breathless (you’re not sure if it’s because of the running or the mesmerizing man in front of you). You’ve never seen him laugh as happily as the one you hear now.

“Hey Marine!”, a call rings out. There’s an avatar walking towards you, and it is only as she gets closer that you’re able to put a name to the face.

“Grace?”, Jake is faster than you.

“Well, who’d you expect, numbnuts? Think fast!”, she tosses something at the both of you. You instinctively catch it and look down to see it’s a Pandoran Banana fruit. A squelch and a groan shifts your attention to Jake and he’s halfway into devouring his. Not one to be shy, you take a bite out of yours. The sound you let out is distinctively obscene and judging by the way Grace covers her face in amusement, you haven’t been as quiet as you hoped you would be.

The stomps of another pair of footsteps drag your attention to another figure entering the clearing–Norm. It seems he had finally caught up to you. The poor guy is bent over, breathing hard and you’re getting concerned. “Are you okay, Nor-“ “I… am a living God!”, he interrupts and poses. The ridiculousness of the statement is all it takes and the group of you are laughing like crazy.

The rest of the day is spent acclimatizing yourself to your new Avatar body. As promised, you drag Jake back, kicking and screaming, to the med techs. You catch his eye and smirk as you watch him get berated by humans less than half his size. As night approaches, you are herded by Grace into an outhouse on the RDA compound. Laying down on your charpoy bed and hear Jake do the same, there’s a silence that fills the air around the both of you and you don’t wish to be the first one to break it.

“Don’t play with that, you’ll go blind”, you murmur.

He drops his braid and huffs lightly. Slowly turning to him, you whisper “Goodnight, Jake” and just as you feel yourself linking out you hear his whispered response.

“Goodnight, Y/N”

The next day finds you bathed and ready in the link room at 0800, as you wait for the others to gather. Today you’ll be allowed to step foot into the actual wilderness of Pandora. Grace had wanted to collect a few root samples and as the fresh new hires, Norm and you were chosen to shadow her along with Jake, who would be accompanying you as a security detail should anything go wrong. A few minutes later, you are linked up and gathered near the Samson with your utility bag thrown over your shoulders. Grace introduces Norm and you to Trudy, your pilot for the day. You don’t miss the fact that Jake already seems to know Trudy and to some extent, Lyle- the RDA soldier accompanying you as human escort, and soon after you’re ready for liftoff.

The sky felt alive, the air was rich with life. You lean out the door from the Samson, and even the trees look more lively in comparison to those planted in the Avatar compound. You make a note to look into the scientific aspects of that once you touch the ground but for now, you let yourself close your eyes and feel the air rushing past you. The exuberance you feel in that moment is incomparable.

“Careful!”, a voice snaps you out of your enjoyment and you turn to Jake who is currently manning the MG on the helo.

You pull yourself back and send him a sheepish grin, “Sorry!”.

Twenty minutes later, you find yourself on the ground as Grace walks around to relay further instructions to Trudy. Lyle is left back with Trudy and the Samson, with Jake tasked with the duty of looking out for dangers.

The trees were much bigger than you had expected, much more vibrant, and to an extent much more dangerous. Your ears flick around with the sounds of the forest, the chirps of the creatures hidden in the foliage. You see Jake’s hands tighten in a white-knuckled grip over the gun as a few Prolemuris swing from the branches overhead and it is only after Grace snaps at him to calm down that he finally loosens his grip over the weapon. Stumbling your way over the vines, Grace leads you to a very man-made structure in a small clearing. It’s long been abandoned, with nature reclaiming parts of the small building.

Grace enters first, and you follow soon after. “This was our school, now it's just… storage”, the disappointment in her voice is evident. “The kids were so bright, eager to learn. Picked up English faster than I could teach it”, she reminisces as she sets a book down on a nearby shelf. You bend down to pick another book up; the title catches your eye- The Lorax by Dr. Seuss. Maybe English wasn’t the only thing Grace wished for the children to pick up on.

She guides Norm and you as you gather the supplies needed for the tests. The place is incredibly dusty, but the supplies are undisturbed and in good condition.

“What happened here?”, Jake’s question prompts the three of you to turn around and you are unable to silence the gasp that you let out at what you see. Bullet holes, a blackboard riddled with bullet holes in a school. Grace doesn’t reply, instead snaps at Jake to help out with the gear. Even without her answer, it was quite clear what had happened— The RDA had opened fire in a school full of children.

With the mood now turned grim, Grace ushers your group out of the school to continue with the task you had intended to accomplish. Walking for a few minutes, you are stopped by Grace gesturing for Norm and you to kneel, she proceeds to pierce the root of a nearby tree with a needle attached to a holo-tab. Both Norm and you switch your attention to the holo-tab held in Norm’s hand as the screen erupts into a colourful cacophony of violets and blues. “That’s signal transduction”, you gasp, “it's that fast!?” “Amazing, isn’t it?”, she responds. While Norm proceeds to collect samples under Grace’s instructions, a flash of glowing white in your peripherals makes you whip your head in its direction; you don’t see anything suspicious but you can't help but squint into the bushes. You look around the clearing for an answer but are soon distracted by Jake wandering off toward a cluster of Helicoradians. Meanwhile, Grace and Norm are busy discussing the collected sample. Seeing your chance, you amble off towards Jake. It’s your first time seeing the plants you’ve seen only in pictures, in person. Orange and cream-coloured spirals that retract at the slightest hint of disturbance.

Jake reaches out to touch one of the Helicoradian before you get a chance to stop him, you hurry toward him as you watch the chain reaction of the entire cluster coil and retract into the ground in mounting horror, which is further increased as now the both of you are face to face with a Hammerhead Titanothere. An angry Hammerhead Titanothere.

You freeze in terror and you see Jake raise his rifle to aim at the animal.

“Don’t shoot. Don’t shoot, you’ll piss him off.” Grace’s voice rings out in your coms, you see her and Norm crouched behind a few trees.

“It’s already pissed off.” You hear Jake respond, unknowingly you have your hand clasped on his arm.

“Jake, that armor’s too thick. Trust me. It’s a territorial threat. Do not run, or he’ll charge.”

“So what do I do, dance with it?”

“Just hold your ground.”

Unfortunately, you holding your ground did not mean the Titanothere wouldn’t as it charged towards you. Jake rushes by you with both his hands up and screaming, surprisingly the tactic seems to work, and you see the animal back away towards its herd. You laugh in disbelief as Jake continues to mock the retreating animal.

“Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about, bitch. That's right, get your punk ass back to mommy.”

The snapping of twigs behind you makes you turn around. Chilled to your bone at what you see you slowly call out to Jake. “Jake? Turn around slowly, no big moves”, maybe it’s the fear in your voice but you hear Jake follow your instructions and his breath hitching lets you know exactly when he sees the creature in front of you.

“Ah, shit.”

The Thanator jumps over you and chases after the Titanothere before it turns around and snarls at you, the tentacles on its head flaring as a sign of aggression.

“So what about this one? Run? Don’t run? What?”

You’re already yanking Jake after you before Grace even manages to reply, “Run! Definitely run!”

Admittedly, running through the jungles of Pandora with a bloodthirsty Thanator chasing your asses was not something you had on your bingo card for the year. Neither was getting separated from Jake as you leap from a waterfall to escape from said Thanator. You hit the water with a splash, the impact forcing the breath out of you. “Don’t let go!”, you hear Jake scream as he tries to grab onto your hand tighter, but you feel your grip slipping. Panic seizes you as the current pulls you away from the shore.

“Jake-!”, your voice is lost as your grip completely loosens and you’re swept under the water. Your lungs burn as you struggle to breathe only to inhale more water. Your vision swam in shades of grey as you get tossed about in rocky waters. You close your eyes and let yourself get carried by the current, you’re too tired to fight anymore. The adrenaline of the chase has leached out every ounce of your energy.

Just as you’re losing the last bit of your consciousness, you feel a tug on your clothing. Had the Thanator finally managed to catch you? Oh well, that was just your luck. You just hope Jake is safe.

A soft tingle on your eyelid manages to tickle you back to consciousness. Eyes closed, you lift your hand to rub your face only to grab hold of something soft and warm. Your eyes snap open and you jerk yourself up in a sitting position.

“I’m alive? I’m alive!”, you laugh in delight before it strikes you that you have something in your hand. Opening your fist, you’re surprised to see a small jellyfish-like white creature float up to your eye level.

“Atokirina”, you whisper in surprise.

It bobs, gently, before you and floats away towards the treeline only to stop and continue bobbing as if beckoning you to follow. You shrug and push yourself up to your feet, it’s getting dark, and you certainly aren’t anywhere close to base camp. Following the sacred spirit seems like the best option for now, especially considering how you’ve lost your voice com and have no fucking idea where the hell you are.

“Well, here goes nothing.” You follow after the Atokirina as it playfully floats ahead of you, deeper into the forest, guiding you.

You’re not sure how long you walk, but the sky has completely darkened and Polyphemus shines high in the night sky. Sometime in the middle of your walk, you are surrounded by more woodsprites. A few rest on your head and arms, while the others bob around you encasing you in a gentle white halo. You wonder if Jake is fine, you haven’t seen any movement around you aside from yours and can only hope Grace and Norm are on their way to send help to the both of you. You’re now sure how long you’d be able to survive in the forest with just your utility knife as a weapon, currently strapped to your outer thigh. You thank your lucky stars for that bit of mercy.

The dispersion of the woodsprites snaps you out of your thoughts and gone with them is the gentle glow that acted as a torch for you to navigate through the uneven forest floor. You scramble around on the ground and stumble upon a piece of wood which you quickly turn into a makeshift torch by tying a ripped section of your tank top. The fire is easily lit, and you turn around to figure out the next course of action to be taken. With no navigation or communication to base, you can only hope to stay safe until daylight.

The chittering of unseen creatures makes the decision easy for you, holding the torch in one hand, you scamper towards a sturdy-looking tree. Scaling the tree comes surprisingly easy, the avatar body is much more muscular than you and you find yourself sitting on a higher branch in no time.

A movement on the ground alerts you to an unknown company, and you hurry to snuff out the fire lest you give yourself away. Blinking to adjust to the sudden darkness, golden eyes flit about the forest floor in search of answers. As if magic, the forest erupts in the majestic colours of blues, greens, and purples, the bioluminescence of the flora acting as natural lighting. A flash of shiny black brings the answer to your unspoken question quickly.

‘Viperwolves’, your mind supplies unhelpfully. A hyena/wolf-like carnivore, extremely adept at hunting prey in packs. You watch its head tilt as if listening to something, and before you know it, it disappears in a flash of black in the direction opposite to yours.

Letting out a breath, you collapse back onto the branch only to be poked in the back by something sharp. “Ow!”, hand on your back, you turn around to be met with an arrow pointing to your face.

Angry, golden eyes narrow at you before the strange Na’vi male barks something at you; you scooch back in fear and confusion only for your hand to meet with air. In a split second, your panicked eyes meet disbelieving ones before you're plunging towards the ground in what is sure to be a gruesome death.

The air is knocked out of you as you hit the floor with a thud. Groaning, you try to push yourself up but collapse again as your hands give out under the pain you feel. A grip lands on your arm, forcing you to your feet. Stumbling by the abruptness of the motion, you lift your head and meet the frowning face of the Na’vi male. His hair is shaved along the sides, almost like a mohawk but with braids. His jaw is set tight, brow furrowed as he glares at you.

“Pesu lu nga?!”, the Na’vi man snarls at you, his grip on your arm tightening.

“I don’t know what you’re saying. I- oe tsun't kame!”, you gasp out, pulling your arm back certainly isn’t the right move. Panic building, you rush to explain yourself. “I’ve lost my way. Th-there was a… a… Thanator, it chased my friend and me”, you pause to swallow, “We got split in the river. I just want to go back, please!”

The Na’vi glowers at you through your explanation, his eyes widening only when you reach the part about your encounter with the Thanator.

“You meet palulukan?”, he asks in English. You nod your confirmation; your eyes are blurry with unshed tears.

You watch as his eyes flit to somewhere above your head before with a yank, he pulls you with him.

“Sutx! sì lu fnu!”, he commands. Meekly you follow his order and stay quiet. It is only once you calm down, you realize that you’re surrounded by other Na’vi, both male and female. The Na’vi holding you captive leads you to a Direhorse; fishing what looks like a rope from a sack, he ties your hands together on one end while keeping the other end looped around his arm. He swiftly mounts the Direhorse, and with a violent yank, you stumble long behind him.

The rest of the party follow after you, whoops and cheers ringing out in the forest as you’re marched on feet to what you feel is a definite death sentence. 

A sudden stop has you bumping into the back of the creature in front.

“Oìsss!”, an angry snarl rings out behind you moments before sharp pain shoots from the base of your head. “Ah!”, you whimper in pain as your braid is pulled with a sharp tug. You hear a hiss from the Mohawk Na’vi, as you so creatively named your captor, before the grip on your braid is loosened and the pain ebbs away into a dull throb.

You move to thank the Na’vi for helping but are stopped short as he takes out a bola, his eyes trained overhead. In a flash of blue, the bola goes flying and you see someone distinctly familiar drop down in front of you.

Jake jumps to his feet and is quick to pull out his knife. Gasping, you rush towards him but are pulled back by your bindings. The warriors following you are quick to surround Jake with their bows drawn, yowling at him. A second later, you see a Na’vi female jump down to stand in front of Jake.

“Mawey, Na'viya! Mawey!”, she speaks. The warrior pulling you dismounts from his steed and walks toward her. She turns around and you see them converse, though your broken Na’vi is hardly sufficient for you to understand everything, you get the gist of the conversation. You are to be led to the Tsahik, the spiritual leader of the People.

The warrior, Tsu’tey, turns toward you and that’s when you see Jake has finally taken notice of you.

“Y/N! You’re ok?”, the worry is clear in his voice as he rushes to you, his eyes flicking down to your tied up hands. You stay silent but nod your head, the relief you feel at seeing Jake is palpable. Soon after, Jake is tied up beside you, the same way you are.

“They’re taking us to their Hometree”, you whisper, “Are you hurt? You look dreadful”

“I’m fine”, motioning to the female with his head he continues, “She saved me.”

“Good. I’m glad you’re ok.”

Along the way, you and Jake fill each other on the happenings after you were dragged underwater. One thing is for sure, you were much lucky compared to him.

Much too soon you feel the party slow down from a trot to a walk. You are entering a massive tree, much bigger than any that you’ve seen in Pandora yet. Na’vi are standing on either side of the party, with a variety of expressions on their faces; curiosity, anger, fear, and rage. It is only when the female walks towards an ornately dressed much older-looking Na’vi male, clearly the Clan Leader, that your stomach erupts in butterflies, nervousness emanating in waves around you. Jake must feel your internal struggle because soon after you feel him pull you closer to himself as he subtly shifts to stand partially in front of you, his gaze hardened and trained on the approaching parties.

Chapter Translations:

Pesu lu nga- Who are you?

Oe tsun't kame- I can't understand

Palulukan- Thanator; dry mouth bringer of fear

Sutx! sì lu fnu!- Follow! And be quiet!

Oìsss- Watch it!

Mawey, Na'viya! Mawey- Calm, people! Calm

[blckbarbiedoll]

Ghost Of You (M.B.)-Chapter 1

Just Trust Me, You'll Be Fine

2005-Chicago, Illinois

The warm spring air was kissing Angie's brown skin. Under different circumstances, she would've taken the time to soak it in. 

"Don't even think about coming back until you've reapplied!" Her father yelled from the front porch. He slammed the door and quickly locked it.

"Shit." Her mind raced trying to think of what to do next. Tears were staining her shirt as they fell from her face. As she put her bags in the trunk, she pulled out her phone and called the one person who could help.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Nat."

"Hey. Are you crying?"

"No." She sniffled. "Yeah."

"What's wrong?"

"Do you think your mom would mind if I stayed with you guys for a few days?"

"Probably not. Why?"

"My dad kicked me out."

"Holy shit. Like for real?"

"He took my fucking key, so yeah."

"Oh my god, Ange. Of course you can come over. I'll talk to Mom."

"Thank you, Nat. Seriously. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Be homeless, probably."

Even in the situation she was in, Nat still made her laugh.

"I'll see you soon."

🤍

'Knock knock'

"Oh, Angelina!" Donna exclaimed as she opened the door.

"Hi, Donna. I hope this is okay."

"More than okay! You're family!" She pulled Angie into a tight embrace and kissed her cheeks.

"Thank you. I won't be here long."

"You can stay as long as you want, honey."

"I really appreciate it."

"Of course. Sugar just stepped out to get some snacks for you two. Do you need help with your bags?"

"I think I'm okay-"

"Michael!" She yelled into the house. "Get down here!"

"That's really okay. I can handle it."

"It's no trouble for him. Seriously."

The dark haired man came down the stairs and gave her a soft smirk. "Hey, Ange." He placed a cigarette between his lips and took a long drag.

"Hey." She smiled.

Mikey Berzatto was the kind of man who got whatever he wanted. He was confident, funny, and handsome as hell. Which is why Angie had such a hard time focusing whenever he was in the same room as her. Throughout the course of her friendship with Natalie, Angie had a crush on her brother for most of it. And he wasn't like the typical older brother. He was nice to her. She would even go as far as to call him her friend. The problem wasn't even that he was her best friend's brother. It was that she was twenty and he was twenty-five.

"Michael, be a dear and help Angie with her bags."

He nodded and put the cigarette out. "Bags? You staying?" He followed her to her car.

"Uh, yeah. My dad sort of...kicked me out."

"Shit. You okay?"

"I guess." She opened the trunk and grabbed the lighter bags. "Aren't you gonna ask what I did?"

"You want me to ask?"

"I dropped out of college."

"What? Why?"

"Because, I don't wanna be a fucking lawyer."

"Well, what do you wanna do?"

She followed him up the stairs to Nat's room. They both set the bags down on the floor and sat on the bed. "Can I be honest?"

"Of course."

"I have no idea what I wanna do."

"That's okay. You're still young."

She rolled her eyes and leaned back on her elbows. "I'm not that young." Ever since she turned eighteen two years ago, Angie had been trying and failing to convince Mikey she wasn't a little kid anymore.

"Fine. You're not that young. But, you're still young. You've got time to decide."

"Shouldn't you be working?"

"I had to take care of some bills. Richie's running the place for me."

"Uh oh."

"Tell me about it."

They heard footsteps approaching the room. The blonde walked through the doorway and grinned. She dropped the bag of snacks on the bed and leaned down to hug her friend.

"Death grip much?" Angie laughed.

"Sorry." She sat next to them on the bed. "I'm just so glad you're here. I'm not happy that you got kicked out, obviously."

"I know. I'd rather be here than home anyway."

"I gotta get back to some paperwork." Mikey headed towards the door. "But I'll catch you later, Ange."

"Bye."

He winked before walking out and closing the door behind him.

"I'm gonna barf." Nat groaned.

"Why?"

"You and Mikey. It's so sweet that it makes me sick."

"What?"

"The girl falling for her best friend's brother. It's a classic."

"Well, that's definitely not what's happening."

"Yeah it is."

"On my side maybe. He still thinks I'm a kid."

"Can you blame him? He's old."

"He is not."

"If you two get married, you'll be changing his diapers."

"Can you not?"

"Fine. But seriously, you guys would be so cute."

"Don't get your hopes up. It's never gonna happen."

"Hey." She rested her hand on hers. "How about we have a movie night?"

"Can I pick?"

"As long as it's The Notebook."

"Duh."

[saikolikes]

Aki’s P5R  fanfic recs! (part 2)

Hi and welcome to another one of my recs posts! As you can see, this is part two: part one of this post can be found HERE and includes fics I bookmarked between April 2019 and December 2020. This second post will deal with everything I bookmarked during 2021 and 2022 (... so yes, part 3 is bound to happen some times in the future)

Here a brief disclaimer:

Everything in here is spoiler for either P5 vanilla, Royal, or Strikers;

I won’t report the tags, as it would take too long, so if you’re interested in a fic, please open the link;

Fic recs obviously reflect my tastes and preferences. For example, I love suffering and I don’t like fluff or domestic works, so browse this list knowing that;

The stark majority of the works here is shuakeshu

If you want more recs you can find them in my bookmarks, most of them are public!

MY ONGOING RECS Again, I don't read a lot of ongoing works (although, admittedly more than in the past) and these are the ones I'm subscribed to that I'm adoring!

The Lovers, Reversed by salexectria, Terra5 (E) | Royalty a/b/o AU | akeshu | series in three parts, ongoing "A Thief is caught stealing from the Northern King, and is sentenced to death for his crimes. The Alpha Prince intervenes, but at what cost to them both?" What I love about this AU is the amount of politics and worldbuilding put into it, as well as the uniqueness of double povs who constantly switch from Akira to Goro creating one back and forth that acts literally like poking into their minds. Plus the slow burn and the pining are just on point.

never die when I'm dead by threerings (E) | Royal & post-Royal | akeshu | series in 2 parts, ongoing Two one shots featuring one of my absolute flavors of this ship: sad, intense and unhinged

IDC FOR UPDATES I resolved to defeat my abandoned-wip trauma one excellent fic at a time so here's a list of works that haven't been updated in a while or the author straight up confirmed they won't keep writing them, but they are so good you just have to read them and let them remodel you. Do it. Do it now.

the year of the knife by theexistentiallyqueer (M) | No powers AU | shuakeshu | 2 chapters "The plan for Akira's junior year of high school was to keep his head down and his nose clean, but he hadn't counted on his new high school having more trouble than it was worth--and he specifically didn't plan on Akechi Goro, the haughty, machiavellian vice president of Shujin Academy's student council, dragging him face-first into political scandal and a series of encounters that would change his life." Please let teq bring you through a journey of spot-on characterization and stunning prose that will rewire your brain chemistry completely. Their take on machiavellian Akechi is really good, and the snark Akira spits in this fic is really something I cherish.

kiss & cry by MajorGodComplex (T) | Figure skating AU | shuakeshu | 2 chapters "Goro’s first thought when he hits the ground is some combination of the words ‘shit fuck hell fucking bullshit bitch fuck motherfucking hell.’ His next thought is wondering whether Akira Kurusu, senior debut, constant thorn in Goro’s side, and the only person anyone this season seems to talk about, is also trying to land a quad axel at the moment." I don't know what to tell you, the prose of this one is so witty and funny you just have to read what's published of it as of now!

honeybrains by succubused (T) | Time loop | shuakeshu | 4 chapters "a chronicle of the twenty-fourth time akira kurusu lived through the month of january 2017" What can I say, I am really a sucker for time loops and this fic took me by the heart. Tagged as character study and with rights because the characterization here is very interesting!

in the snow globe by aminami (E) | Time travel | shuake | 1 chapter "It’s your heart,” Joker says like it’s the most obvious thing. “Your desires, your hopes, your fears. I’ll carry them with me always. My little snow globe." This fic will hurt you so badly but it will be so worth it, I swear. It's just so melancholic and tender and angsty and it carved a place in my heart.

my love has never lived indoors by rhodophytae (E) | a/b/o | shuake | 1 chapter "Ren Amamiya knows he's an alpha, and he's comfortable with that, but he's pretty sure that being an alpha is, well...different for him than it is for other people. He resigned himself a long time ago to the fact that he'd probably go his whole life without finding anyone else like him. And then he meets Goro Akechi." This fic has such an interesting take on omegaverse! Paired with a stellar characterization and delicious pining, it's no surprise it's a fic I will never forget.

GENERAL RECS The fics I’ve enjoyed the most and that I go back to reading sometimes.

how joker and crow survived the coronavirus pandemic of 2020 by shntlvs (T) | Royal | shuakeshu | series of 2 works "Escaping from Maruki's false reality gets interrupted by the Coronavirus pandemic." Could you have ever imagined reading a fic centered around the pandemic? Me neither, but this one and its sequel work so well and have very compelling bits of characterization for the boys. Unexpected premise, but I utterly loved it.

straw house, straw dog by caelam (T) | 3rd sem | gen | one shot "In the saccharine utopia of Maruki’s reality, Goro Akechi’s mother is still alive." I admittedly don't read too many fics with mamakechi so I won't claim to be an expert, but this one really left me impressed with how clear and tangible the tangle of feelings is.

Knight of Pentacles, King of Spades by Naometry (M) | Medieval AU | shuakeshu | 11 chapters "“Hifumi passed on your greetings,” Akira Kurusu says, fury simmering beneath his conversational tone. “And I’m polite enough to give you my own in person. So greetings, General Goro Akechi. I am the man who will kill you.”" I started reading this fic for the war captive trope but this story has so much more to it than just that. Nao's superb skill with writing violence and viciousness will have you thrust into a cruel world where two boys seem to be bound to kill each other... unless?

Ripples by Riona (T) | gen | canon compliant | one shot "Ten people know exactly who the news is talking about, and now they’re going to have to deal with that." A peek into the heads of 10 of Joker's confidants upon learning about his death. The fic I would never imagined myself reading, but I did because it was recced to me, and now I'm recc'ing it to you, too.

When Your Eyes Meet Mine by seths_dream (E) | no powers AU | shuake | one shot "The way the bellboy lingered on him made his heart jolt, made him think that maybe, maybe the bellboy was looking at Goro the same way Goro was looking at him." I've lost count of how many times I read this fic because the horny is just so juicy, it's unironically one of the fics I come back to when I need to remind myself how to write horny stuff. (the same author also wrote this delicious pegoryu that you have to read)

a study in what not to say by succubused (T) | 3rd sem | shuake | one shot "Akira has finally had enough of Akechi's bullshit; they resolve it the only ways they know how." If you like the boys being really nasty to each other, this fic is a must. It has excellent dialogue, dynamics, and a tad of homoerotic wound tending which can't hurt no one!

MY ALL-TIME FAVOURITES The fics that rewired my brain chemistry, took my heart out, slapped it, put it back, and left me a whole new person.

27 steps to seduce a crow by relationshipcrimes (G) | Royal | shuakeshu | one shot "A handy bullet-pointed list on how to flirt with, seduce, and keep your local Akechi Goro." Still to this day, I think of this fic in terms of Goro's characterization. If I have a thing for post-canon shuake chasing each other, it's probably due to this one.

The Brigverse by TzviaAriella (E but most works are M) | Pirates AU | akeshuake | series, ongoing I admittedly don't care that much about pirates but the og fic from this series (A Brig Too Far) was being passed on so much that I gave it a try and. Oh boy. Not only is the characterization impeccable, the story compelling, and the action thrilling, but at least one scene and/or line from each work in this series has altered my brain permanently. I am a new person after reading Brigverse.

wild and free by bangandawhimper (E) | a/b/o | shuakeshu | one shot "Akira Kurusu hasn’t always been an omega. But now everyone he meets in this city assumes he’s an omega. He’s treated like an omega. He feels like an omega. He knows he feels like an omega because he remembers what it was to be an alpha." This work might have my favourite take ever on shuakeshu omegaverse, it's so fitting for them, so thought out, and the characterization is so on point... my god. Read this fic now.

The Diamond Chest by kinneas (E) | post-Royal | shuakeshu | 3 chapters, complete "Who says you have to see Morgana speak in the Metaverse before you can hear him in the real world? Not the few hundred officers who arrested Ren in Sae’s Palace two years ago, that’s for sure." Honestly everything kinnes writes is gold but I'm shouting this fic out because I reread more than a few scenes from this fic more than once, and it's a 100k-words baby. I am a sucker for heist stories, I am a sucker for dealing with trauma in very tangible ways, and I'm a sucker for kinneas' characterization of the boys.

before midnight by specterthief (Not rated) | 3rd sem, canon compliant | gen | one shot "“I—” Swallowing past the lump in her throat, Sumire sets down her chopsticks and rubs her face with both hands. “Um—who told you I was going to training camp?” (On January 9th, Sumire goes home.)" This is the stellar Sumire characterization fic you're looking for. Read this. Read this right now.

I HOPE THIS DOESN'T AWAKEN SOMETHING IN ME (DELUSIONAL) I clicked on these fics solely due to my trust in the authors/the summary/one rec and now I find myself with a new kink. Thanks.

Containment Breach by salexectria (E) | Space pirates AU | akeshu | one shot Akira gets stranded on an abandoned spaceship seemingly infested by a terrifying creature. He finds the lonely survivor of the crew and they begrudgingly start to work together to contact help and survive. I am just going to say that I clicked for salex's name, I stayed for the stellar characterization, pining and top-tier bantering, and got overwhelmed by the tentacle sex. (/pos)

it takes two by lumensd (E) | 3rd sem | akeshu | two-shots By all means, this series has some things I usually am not interested in (phone sex, degradation) but Jay is so skilled and his akeshus are so fucked in the head that now I've signed up for the masochist Joker agenda. Hurray!

i dream of you draped in wires by rime (E) | 3rd sem | akeshu | one shot "Maruki's Shadows don't want to fight; they just want to collect data. Wait, are those cat ears?" You would think a work with the tag "catboy shibari gunplay fuckordie" can't be too serious. Wrong! Excellent character study attack 🔪🔪🔪 (from the same author there's also this P5 vanilla fic that is excellent)

Darken my doorway by EnlacingLines (E) | 3rd sem-post canon | akeshu | one shot ""I don’t need to test my theory. You should be thanking me, really. Opening this door for you.” “A door to what?” Akira says, exasperated by just how self congratulatory Goro still sounds.“ Submission.” Or: I am a firm switch shuake shipper, I don't vibe with too-extreme dynamics *proceeds to go ballistics over this fic regardless*, *awakens to the wonder of d/s a lil fucked up dynamics*

[entomolog-t]

Bite Me - Chapter 9

Aedes deals with his 5 senses while June cleans her room.

Some last minute changes made this update brutal- but we made it.

I also incorporated a promptober prompt!! Sunrise

Taglist: @smallsday @ratcatcher0325 @not-a-space-alien @bittykimmy13 @naive-bias

- - - -

Previous Chapter: Chapter 8

Next Chapter: Chapter 10

Word count: 1816

CW: Mentions of blood, Adult language, depiction of sensory overload/Panic

June Murphy blinks- the act in and of itself far more effort than it should be. Her eyes dry and sore from crying- eyelids heavier than should be physically possible, as if some invisible weight hung off them. Face raw from a tear stricken night, she stares at her wall, watching as the first light of day creeps into her room. Even her thoughts feel heavy as she stares blankly ahead. 

Had she slept? She wasn’t really sure. It certainly didn’t feel like she had- though… it certainly didn’t feel like she’d been awake either. 

Her joints groan in protest as she stands, neck stiff from the awkward position she’d held while slumped beside her bed. June tries in vain to rub the tiredness from her eyes, but all she manages to do is to further irritate the rawness of her tear stained face. 

June chews her lip- Memories of the night still fresh in her mind. Closing her eyes, she could almost feel him in her palm- the way he twitched and squirmed under her touch. The thoughts felt dirty now with the context of hindsight. He’d been terrified, and she… she had liked it. Her hands claw through her tangled mess of hair. What the fuck was wrong with her? Who likes that? Why would she ever like that? He was so small, and had been so terrified, how could she- 

June pauses. 

She had been sure it was real, but now as daylight crept around her room so did doubt creep into her mind. It was all so absurd. A tiny vampire sneaking into her house? It had to have been a dream right? She just had the strangest nightmare imaginable. That was it. Maybe it had been a bit more lucid than her typical dreams. That wasn’t that weird right? It was just abnormally lucid and..  and she just thought she’d been awake.

June swallows the dryness in her mouth- not keen on thinking about what the contents of such a bizarre and emotionally charged dream must say about her psyche. 

Her movement is stiff and tired as she drags herself to the washroom, desperately washing her face with cool water, as if temperature could somehow shock her back to fully believing in some version of reality. June winces. The sight of herself in the mirror should have come with a warning. She looked rough. Painfully red eyes stare back at her behind swollen lids- Her skin sallow and dull - looking  just as exhausted as she felt. 

As her eyes scam her reflection, her breath catches. 

Two impossibly small punctures on her neck - nearly imperceptible, if not for the slight redness and bruised halo around them. 

She watches her reflection as her lips draw into a tight line. 

It… it had happened. It had all really happened. 

The reality of the situation felt heavy- oddly enough, it was not the absurdity of the situation, but the implication that the emotions had all been real. The realization that she had gotten off on some twisted sort of psychological torment on a man she had known for what? All of twenty minutes??

June chews her lip, thoughts of his wide eyed expression filling her mind- those hushed pleas uttered between sobs. Her throat tightens. 

You’re fucking vile

The echo of his words in her mind seem to tie her stomach in knots. She was, wasn’t she? She was fucking sick to have wanted … that.

God, what was she thinking? She didn’t even know him? Hell, he wasn’t even human. His existence didn’t even seem real- yet the desire that he incited was all too real- and all too potent.  

A quiet part of her resents him. The way he’d played along- how he seemed to untangle some deeply knotted part of her- how he let her loose only to choke her with the slack. How could he make her feel that way, only to rip it away from beneath her. 

June frowned at the way her logic twisted in her mind. 

He’d been splayed out in her palm- restrained by her hand… so why did she feel like she’d been struck at her most vulnerable?

June groans. Her mind far too exhausted to try and decipher the reasons behind weird hypocritical thoughts. There was a heavy weight that seemed to reside in her chest, an impending sense of dread that loomed within her. Aedes was gone. 

Aedes was gone because of her.

Because she was sick. 

There was nothing left- no way to apologize, no way to make it right... Nothing to do except sit here and fester in her shame. She hated that it wasn’t just guilt gnawing at the edges of her mind. She was still so curious- and she resented it. 

The same curiosity that cornered him- that had led to all of this. 

And yet… she couldn’t rid herself of her nature. 

Her mind begged for answers- Why was he so small? How could vampires exist? Who else knew? Could he turn into a bat? Did they congregate in … flocks? Colonies? 

June flops to her bed- desperately wishing for the sleep that evaded her, but the soft morning light and whirring thoughts in her head make dozing off an impossible feat. 

There was nothing she could do. 

The finality of it was sickening. No apology, no reconciliation, no answers. All she was left with were questions and shame. 

June sits up. If there was nothing she could do, she might as well make herself busy. Busy hands make for a quiet mind, or something like that. 

----

Aedes leg shakes - irritation plain on his face. 

She hadn’t slept. 

She hadn’t slept one fucking minute. 

An uneasiness crept over him as the room slowly became lit with the light of day. The dark of the night offered discretion- plentiful security within its shadows. The day however, was a different beast entirely. 

The woman idles around her room, picking up various discarded items off the floor. He grimaced as she removed more and more of the potential cover leading toward the window. There was no way he’d be able to sneak off unnoticed in broad daylight. 

Aedes felt the all too familiar ache of bloodlust rising in his chest. He hadn’t drank nearly enough. With nothing to occupy his hunger other than his thoughts, a familiar clarity rolled over him as his senses sharpened, instinct trying to direct him to the meal he was all too aware of. 

Aedes swallows- mouth wet. 

The beat of her heart pounds on steadily. 

Thud after thud.

Continuous. 

Just for one second he needed silence. A moment to think- to gather his thoughts. He bounced his leg, a steady tension mounting within him. Fuck. Each beat seemed to stop his thoughts in their track- drawing his focus away from any meaningful planning and back to her. The steady thrum of her heart a sirens song, begging him to forgo hiding. Beckoning him to dive into her. To drown in her. No. The last thing he wanted was to be anywhere near her again. He’d been hungry before- he could go hungry again.

Aedes grit his teeth. 

Thump.

He would wait this out. 

Thump.

Come nightfall he would leave. 

Thump.

He would absolutely leave- 

Thump.

He just needed to- 

Thump.

To figure a way out- 

Thump.

To get to the window- 

Thump.

To feed- 

His claws dug into his scalp- his hands desperate to hold himself together as her pulse throbbed in his ears. Loud. Everything was too loud. The steady rumble of her feet on the floor grates at his nerves. She meandered around the room, never staying still for more than a moment or two before moving on to another spot. Every thundering step sends a jolt through him- The world buzzing around him. 

Why couldn’t she just fucking stand still?

He took a breath, his inhale shaky, and unfortunately deep. He caught her scent hanging thick in the air, her very essence an overwhelming caress. Like velvet, her scent thick and warm, teasing his desire- whispering promises of indulgence. She smells of sweet cream and soft spice- her skin of milk and honey. Of cardamom and comfort, of passionate glances and carnal desires. 

Carnivorous desires. 

He remembers how she tasted on his tongue, the allure of her scent paling in comparison to her taste. She was ambrosia on his lips and transcendent on his tongue. She tasted of life-  of potential and passion- she tasted of more. 

God he wanted more. 

Needed more. 

Aedes gnashed his teeth. He felt the world around him consuming him. Picking him apart- biting into him. His breaths came quickly- air feeling numb on his lips. Never enough. Never enough air. Never enough of her. The sound around him was chaos. Her blood seemed to roar in his ears. Her heels thundering on wood. Wood that trembled beneath him. It shook- he shook. 

He shouldn’t be here. 

Every breath was sugared with her. Drowning in her. His stomach twists- hunger gnawing away at his rationality. At his resolve. Her overwhelming presence devouring him from the inside. Mouth open he gasps- though not for air- for her. His mouth drips with desperation. Longing. Need. Aedes bites into the flesh of his hand- his teeth breaking the skin as easily as wading through water. The tang of his blood foul in his mouth. Wrong. Grotesque. An insult to the memory of her on his tongue. His jaw clenches- twitching against his will. 

He bit harder. His face slick with blood and drool. 

He needed to stop this. 

To think- 

To breathe. 

He needed blood. 

Her heart beat in tandem with his own. Calling him- begging him. Each pulse was a promise- of air. Of quiet. Of life. 

A siren's song. A sweet harmony crying out between each and every pulse.

He froze.

A voice- both stunning and haunting cut through his senses. All else seems to fade- the rush of her blood, the beating of her heart, even his own desperate thoughts became white noise in the presence of her voice. Silken and opalescent- it carried air to his lungs on its warbling melody.

It beckoned him, yet nothing like the beating of her heart. This compulsion was all his own, not some ancient instinct clawing its way through his consciousness. 

Head ducked, Aedes half crawled half walked to the edge of his cover under the dresser. 

She sang of crumbling, of breaking down- stolen kisses and stolen glances.

I fall to pieces

Each time I see you again

His breath caught in his throat.

She was …. Beautiful.

Incredible in her immensity-  Her entirety more akin to a landscape than a body- her beauty that of a sunset. 

Warm. 

Vast. 

Untouchable. 

He stood in the light of her song, feeling as though he was blinded by a second sun. 

[doe-eyed-fool]

Prey | Chapter Twenty Four

Warning(s): Electrocution, Abuse

"B-But, I read over the contract you made me sign!" You cry. "It didn't mention anything about me giving up my soul!" Vox scoffs. "Haven't you ever heard of 'reading the fine print'. Said fine print being, don't be so trusting of Overlords."

You had no one to blame but yourself for this, you got yourself in this situation. But that didn't make you any less furious, or any less terrified of what will happen next.

"What are you going to do with me?" You ask, fear evident in your voice. "What I've been doing. You keep working for me, and in the meantime, I get to watch your precious fiancé get worked up by it." Vox says with a chuckle. "How smoothly this will go entirely depends on you. So, are you going to behave yourself?"

You grip onto the collar of the chain tightly, embarrassed and outraged by how he was talking down to you. Your silence angered Vox, and suddenly, your body seized with pain.

A silent scream left your agape mouth, every muscle in your body felt as it were exploding. You couldn't move, you couldn't scream, you couldn't breathe. All you could do was suffer as Vox sent volts of electricity throughout your body.

Shortly after, the pain faded and you felt to your knees gasping for air. "I'll ask one more time." Vox's voice made your head snap up at him, eyes pleading for mercy as you still could not find your voice.

"Are you going to behave?"

You sniffle as you shamefully nod your head, too afraid of more pain that would come if you didn't do as he said. "Good." The chain disappeared, and your held your sore neck in your trembling hands.

"There's gonna be some new rules from here out." Vox started. "Number one, you will do as your told, including orders from my partners. Two, you will be under surveillance to assure you don't try anything stupid. Three, and most important of all..." Vox grabs your chin, forcing you to look him in the eyes as he spoke.

"You are not to go anywhere near that fucking hotel or Alastor, ever again. Do I make myself clear?"

You nod your head, sniveling pathetically. "Good girl." Vox lets you go. And with a much cheerier voice says. "No run along. Get some rest, prep that singing voice. Remember, you have a show coming up soon."

You slowly pull yourself up on shaky legs, and drag yourself towards the elevator. The whole ride down, you felt wave after wave of dread hitting you all at once. Your soul belongs to an Overlord. Not just any Overlord, a very powerful and dangerous Overlord. And you did that all on your own.

The elevator doors open, and you stepped out. The people in the lobby, their voices, your surroundings all became nothing but a muffled blur. Your eyes focused on nothing in particular as you stared off into space.

The muffled noise of the lobby started to grow louder and more intense, until it was a sharp ringing in your ears. The thumping of your heart did nothing but add to the overwhelming noise.

You almost didn't notice when your bumped into someone.

"Hey, watch where your...Oh it's you." You look up. A tall white and pink spider demon looked back at you. "You're Alastor's little hottie, ain't ya?"

You blinked a few times before gathering your senses. "W-Who are you?"

"Ya haven't heard of me?" The spider raises an eyebrow. "Eh, never mind actually. You're as about as old as Freaky Face, ya probably don't even look at any screens. Anyway, the name's Angel Dust."

"Oh?" You murmur. "H-How do you know me?"

"Charlie was telling us about you." Answered Angel. "The hell are ya doing here anyway? You look a wreck." Tears started to flood your eyes, causing Angel to panic slight. "Ey uh...ya good? Something the wrong..." Angel trailed off. "Oh, ya didn't." He muttered.

"You sold your sold, didn't ya?"

"I didn't sell him anything!" You yell. "It wasn't my choice! I wouldn't have never...I didn't...H-He said he wouldn't..." You couldn't form a proper sentence before you broke down sobbing. Angel, clearly uneased by your outburst, tried to calm you down.

"H-Hey it's alright! Well...it's not but uh...It'll be fine!"

"I'm so stupid. Of course this was going to happen!" You cried. "What am I going to do?"

"Well, I mean. Ya are Alastor's fiancé. Just tell him what's goin' on." Said Angel. "I can't." You tell him. "I'm not allowed to see him. I'll be under surveillance. Vox will know."

"Well, he's gonna know you're gone sooner than later." Angel shrugs. And you feared the worst, if Alastor does come looking for you. He's powerless at the moment, if he tried to fight Vox, he would most certainly lose. He'd be killed. You couldn't let that happen.

"Angel, will you send a message for me?"

“Alastor!” Charlie’s pleading voice wouldn’t reach Alastor’s ears. “You can’t go! You just recovered after fighting Adam!” She chased after Alastor, who stormed his way down to the hotel lobby. A thick ear piercing static buzz imitating from him, his smile twisted up as wide as it will go, threatening to split his jaw open.

“What if you get hurt!?” Charlie grabs onto his arm. Alastor, in a flash, grabbed her wrist in a near bone crushing grip. She flinched, not from the pain, but from the look on Alastor’s face. “Let. Me. Go.” Alastor growled. A warning, not a request.

Vaggie grabbed onto her spear, but was stopped by Husk. He shook his head at her, and before Vaggie could push past him, Charlie spoke again.

“Alastor, please!” Charlie begs. “We’ll figure this out. Just, please, calm down first.”

“There is nothing to figure out. Vox is keeping Y/n captive and doing who knows what to her! I will not rest until I get her back, and I will not allow anyone to stop me!” Alastor ripped his arm away from Charlie’s grasp.

“I told ya, he wouldn’t like the news.” Angel murmured. “I don’t care if he liked the news or not!” Said Vaggie. “He doesn’t need to take out his anger on us! Let him get himself killed instead of thinking of a proper plan!"

"Boss, think about it." Said Husk. "Going alone straight into a fight with Vox, is exactly what he wants. He's probably planned ahead of time for this. If you go now, there's a chance you'd be throwing your life away."

Normally, Alastor would have quickly silenced Husk for daring to go against him. But he had a point. And unfortunately, Husk was too clever and observant for his own good. Alastor didn't miss the way Husk eyed him after returning from the battle. Alastor suspected Husk knew something was wrong, and unfortunately for Alastor, he was right.

The buzz toned down from Alastor, but he was still visibly tense and irritated. "Then what do you suppose I do? Just do nothing, while Y/n could be suffering?"

"Not do nothing." Said Charlie before turning to Angel. "You said Vox owns her soul now, right?" Angel nods. "From how she acted, she got tricked into it."

"Maybe my dad can help?" Charlie wonders. "I mean, if he says to give her soul back, Vox would have to listen."

"Hate to say it, but that's not how it works." Alastor muttered. "The only one who can return a soul back to it's original owner, is the Overlord who possess it. And Vox isn't going to do that anytime soon. Just one of the conditions made by your father when it comes to human souls."

Charlie huffs angrily. "Well there has to be some way out it!" She pulls her phone from her pants pocket. "It can't hurt to ask." It wasn't very long before Lucifer arrived at the hotel after the phone call.

"Sorry about the wait." Lucifer said after portaling into the lobby. "Moving my stuff over here is taking longer than exacted. Now, what's this about needing help, Char Char?" He asks his daughter.

"It's a bit complicated." Charlie starts. Lucifer shrugs his shoulders. "Nothing's too complicated when it comes to you, sweetie. Go ahead, hit me!"

"We need your help breaking a soul contract."

"O-Oh! Ohhhh uhh...yeah....no. No I can't do that." Lucifer murmurs. "Is there really nothing you can do?" Charlie asks. "Alastor's fiance is in big trouble, and we have to help her!"

"Wait. He is engaged to someone?" Lucifer looks to Alastor, who returned a look of offense and pure hatred. "That has to be one of the most shocking things I've ever heard."

"Dad this is serious!" Said Charlie firmly. "She could be in danger!"

"Ok, ok. Let me think." Lucifer rubs his chin. "I can't break their contract. And smiles over here would have to kill Vox in order to get her soul back, and by doing so, taking possession of all souls he owns."

Charlie shook her head. "If we can avoid a fight, then we should. Especially after what happened to the hotel."

"Well...You see you're not gonna like this buuuuut..." Lucifer rubs the back of his neck. "It's most likely going to have to come down to that. Not unless Vox gives up Y/n's soul willingly. If Alastor and Vox agree to it, they can make a deal of their own. In which they battle for the souls owned by the other."

"This is the first I'm hearin' of this." Said Angel. "How come no Overlords have ever done it?"

"They use to. Way before this era of Overlords were around, that is." Lucifer explained. "At a certain point, Overlords found it unnecessary. No one's tried it since."

"If killing that pompous prick means Y/n is safe again, then so be it." Alastor hissed.

"Yeah but uh, Y/n said that she didn't want you to come looking for her, because of exactly that. Remember?" Said Angel. "She was dead set on making sure a fight wouldn't happen. Which confused the hell outta me. You're stupidly strong, why would she not want you to come get her?"

Before Alastor could come up with an excuse, Husk spoke. "He's hurt."

Alastor's head snapped towards him, if looks could kill, Husk would be dead where he stood.

"Hurt!? Alastor, you're hurt?" Charlie gasped. "Why didn't you say something?"

"Ignore him, Charlie. He doesn't know what he's talking about." Alastor near growled. Husk, unphased, continued. "Come on, boss. Drop the act. Are you really gonna get yourself killed over your pride? What good to Y/n would you be dead?"

Husk knew damn well he could be next in line for a radio broadcast for this. But there wasn't much Alastor could do to him now. He'd deal with the consequences after the situation would be settled.

"Alastor?" Charlie asks. Alastor looked away with a deep sigh. "My fight with Adam proved to be more difficult than I had planned for. I am...not at my best at the moment."

"I'd say." Lucifer chimed in. "I can sense that more than just your health was damaged. Spit it out creep, what else is wrong?" If Alastor were able, he'd shove Lucifer's stupid looking cane right up his-

"Alastor, please tell us." Said Charlie. "We can help you."

"If it will cease this barrage of questioning....Adam damaged my staff, the very source of my power." The hotel lobby fell silent. Everyone, unsure of how to react to this news.

"So, you're completely powerless now?" Asked Vaggie, perplexed. "And you were just gonna storm into the Vee's tower and demand for Y/n's soul?"

"Yeah, not the best plan Bambi." Lucifer chuckles. "Lucky for you, I might be able to lend a hand. If, you ask nicely, of course." He says with a smirk.

"Dad, please don't start-" Charlie's words were cut short as Alastor walked past her towards her father. "I hate you." Alastor began. "Words can't not describe just how much I absolutely loathe you. And I'd sooner tear out my own innards one by one than to ever grovel before you of all demons...But..."

Everyone, including Lucifer, watched in stunned silence as Alastor lowered his head slightly. "I love Y/n more than I hate you so...please...help me."

Lucifer blinked a few times before finally speaking. "U-Uh yeah, sure. Wow. You uh, you must really love this Y/n person, huh?" Alastor nods, his voice surprisingly gentle as he answered.

"More than anything."

Vox was serious when he said you would be monitored from here on out. Ever since you left the Vee's tower after finding out your soul was no longer yours, drones, cameras, and constant phone calls from Vox had been a daily occurrence for you.

Vox's "eyes" would not follow you in your apartment, but as soon as you step foot outside, he'd have a full and clear view of you and would track you where you might go.

And God help you if you missed one of his calls, it was another way for him to keep track of you, and if you ignored it. There would be hell to pay.

And what's more, Vox assigned two Hellhounds to keep watch over you. 'I'll let you have security, just like you asked.' You remember him saying. You never thought you'd regret having someone to look out for your safety until now.

Needless to say, you were very on edge. Being watched nearly at all hours of the day, it was driving you crazy. The only privacy you had was when you were inside your home, and even then it would not last long. You were constantly being called back to the tower for photoshoots, advertisements, or whatever else he wanted you for.

There were only a few more days until your next performance, and you were such a wreck, you considered canceling. Though, you were certain that would not be an option.

You walked into your living room after getting dressed. You took a long shower, thinking it might relax you. It didn't. And that was when you saw it. A shadowy figure making it's way out and into the open.

You gasped backed away. The shadow noticed you and smiled wide, then it hit you. This shadow was no ordinary shadow, or some demonic creature that had snuck it's way in.

"It's you..."

This shadow, belonged to Alastor.

You recognized it's pointed deer ears, and most of all, it's unsettling smile. The shadow kept it's distance, looking at you one last time, before beginning to fade. As it did, something else took it's place.

Where the shadow once was, now sat a small vintage radio. You walked over and picked up the radio, looking it over. You turned the dial, hearing it buzz to life, and nearly dropping it as you heard Alastor's voice coming from the speaker.

'Y/n, dear? Are you there?'

"Alastor?"

'Ah, good. My shadow was able to reach you. Wonderful news darling, I'll be on my way to come get you soon.'

"Alastor you can't. You'll be killed without your powers." You tell him. "I can't let you do that."

'And I can't allow you to suffer at the hands of that bastard. Listen to me, my love. My powers are near fully restored, thanks to a little help. You won't be waiting much longer, I promise you.'

Even so, the risk of Alastor getting hurt or worse was still there. Vox was no one to underestimate. As he said himself, he holds the title for most powerful Overlord.

"Please, Alastor. You just can't."

'Y/n, I will be fine. If anything, you should worry more for Vox. By the end of this, he will know true suffering.' The radio fizzed with static towards the end of Alastor's sentence.

"But Alastor-"

'Y/n. I mean it, I will get you back. Your soul will be yours, and this whole situation will be a thing of the past. I assure you, everything will be fine.'

"But what if it won't be? Alastor...I'm just...I'm so scared." Your hold on the radio tightened to keep your hands from shaking. "I'm scared of what might happen to me. More than that, I'm scared of what might happen to you...There's so much I have to say to you. And if you die because of me...Because I was stupid enough to get myself into the situation in the first place, I'll never forgive myself!" You cried.

"I just...I want to go back. Back before all of this happened, back to when everything was so simple and nice. I just can't help but wonder, Alastor...what our lives would have been like. You and I, we were going to get married. And then...everything took a turn for the worst. And it only got worse from there...But I know deep down, we would have been so happy. Just you and me."

'We did have happy times back then, didn't we? I have no doubt we could have had much more. But that doesn't mean it has to end there. Y/n, I have no right to ask you this but, if you will have me...I will make sure there will be more of those times. I will do everything I can to make it so. Anything you want, will be yours. You'd only need ask it.'

"Anything?" You murmur.

'Anything.'

You look at the radio you hold in your hands, the faintest of smiles growing on your face. "All I want...is for you to be here with me."

'Then it shall be done. Just hold on a bit longer, my love.'

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