#Cartman x reader

[nwjn-z]

𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐌𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐅𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐏*𝐫𝐧 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬

warning(s): nsfw, swearing, straight up p*rn

author’s note: i was going through my bookmarks and thought of this, they are aged up to be in their 20s don’t be weird

⭑ kyle broflovski

is such a love maker but can also be so rough. absolutely loves using your clothes as leverage to fuck you. has ripped multiple skirts, panties, and dresses before bc he doesn’t realise his own strength when he is pulling on them bc he gets so lost in how good your pussy feels. he’s addicted. (it’s okay bc he bought you new ones to say sorry)

⭑ stan marsh

love love loves lazy but still rough sex. he loves laying back and watching you bounce yourself on his dick while pulling your hair and slapping your ass. music in the back is a must when yall are fucking. loves praising you.

⭑ kenny mccormick

loves hitting it from the back. he’s a certified freak but sometimes he likes to really enjoy simple sex yk? but what he loves most is when you rock yourself back on him and use his cock to get yourself off. he thinks it’s the hottest shit ever seeing you eagerly fuck your self with his dick.

⭑ eric cartman

rough. hard. and fast. would best describe sex with eric. one thing him and kyle have in common is being the roughest guys in bed. he literally fucks you into the mattress. loves pushing down on your waist and drilling himself in you.

[halliestinks]

Random silly texts between the main 4 (PT 3!!)

a/n: made another one of these cuz I have no motivation to finish the request i’m currently working on 🤗 (part 1) (part 2)

stan marsh

kyle broflovski

kenny mccormick

eric cartman

[oniikabuto]

one bed!

-- sfw --

characters: kyle broflovski, kenny mccormick, stan marsh, eric cartman

a/n: i did this for a different fandom like a year ago. i love the one bed trope i just had to write a new one for south park....,,, lmk if you want part 2

notes: fluff yayyy; gn reader; characters have a fat crush on you live laugh mutual pining;

guys requests are very much open rigjt now pleasseeeekksflkdfnkjs

— ⛧ k. broflovski

sweetest guy. he doesn't want to take your bed, but you insist.

he also hangs his jacket on the door and keeps his hat neatly on your desk... which is kinda funny and cute that he tries so hard to be neat

freezes up and goes red when you slide into the bed next to him. poor boy is about to melt.

"dude why are you so sweaty are you okay"

"huh- what? yeah, yeah it's cool i'm fine it's..,,,,,,,"

wakes up with a puddle of drool and a wet cheek. he panics and wipes his face and looks over to see if you're awake. you pretend you aren't for kyle's sake. he's so cute.

his nose also does that stupid whistley thing it's so funny

a relatively still sleeper. he just kinda curls up and.. sleeps. sometimes he murmurs something in his sleep.

"cartman.. shut up..",

"what?", you murmur groggily.

"no"

"kyle??? are you awake??"

(no response)

genuinely cannot remember any of that when he wakes up.

— ⛧ k. mccormick

it's like 1am and you turn off the movie as the credits roll.

when you look over at kenny, he looks like a baby that had just woken up.

"dude, what time is it..", he murmurs.

"um.. late." you definitely did not mean to have him over for so long.

"do you wanna go home, or like.. stay with me?"

kenny perks up immediately when you offer to let him spend the night. huge, shit-eating grin spread across his face.

"dumbass", you laugh. but you kinda wanted him over, too.

he sits in your room and pokes at all of your plushies while he waits for you to go get a change of clothes for him. ("no way you're sleeping in that eyesore of a parka!")

almost faints when you change your shirt in front of him

youre the only person that can fluster him like that.

sleeps curled up like a little car

(I MEANT TO TYPE CAT BUT THATS REALLY FUCKING FUNNY)

makes funny noises

like when a dog is sleeping

you'll wake up with his face in your chest and he'll swear it was an accident. it was not

— ⛧ s. marsh

you were at your desk doing homework and stan was on your bed on his phone, both doing your own thing as music played from your speaker.

it's not until that last math problem that you realize it's late. really, really late. you look over at stan, and he's face-down dead asleep on your bed, phone still in one hand.

you don't want to wake him up and tell him to go home, so instead you take his hat off and leave it on your bedpost.

he's splayed across the bed right in the middle.

how?? are you supposed to move him???

after a moment of deliberation, you hold your breath and roll him over, praying he doesn't wake up.

he does obviously

"ow..???? y/n??"

"shit. sorry. it's late, just go back to sleep. you can walk home tomorrow morning."

"wha- okay"

he's too tired to object

plus he secretly loves being in your bed. it smells like you

snores and breathes kinda funny once in a while

no matter how still he looks when you get into the bed with him, somehow you wake up with his limbs sprawled out like a spider.

in the morning, his leg is on top of you and his hand is on your face.

— ⛧ e. cartman

actually such a bitch about staying over

he definitely tried to distract you so that he would HAVE to spending the night

he just loves spending time with you but he doesnt wanna ask :(

"but the couch will make my back stiff! i'll be soo sore in the morning!"

"just say you want to sleep in my room with me, cartman."

"whaat?? if you insist, i guess!"

makes himself absolutely at home. if you want to sleep in your own bed, you'll have to sleep on top of him or touching him.

he definitely does that on purpose

as much as it pains you to admit it, cartman is actually like really really comfortable.

even if he's squishing you to death

and he claims he has no idea he does that in his sleep

smells like a dove soap bar or like. baby shampoo and its actually really nice

snores like a monster truck engine

leaves his shit all over the floor but also offers to help clean up to impress you

(he cant clean for shit but at least he tried??)

[oldwritingm]

congrats on 400 & i'm so happy to be here!!!

for the event, if you still write for south park, could i get headcanons of maybe the main 4 + butters receiving genuine, heartfelt compliment and love from their partner? male or gn if that's okay/needed!!!

i've been craving soft comfort qwq

- 🍡

Here you are love!

South Park - Main Four (+ Butters) Reacting to Genuine Affection

Kyle

Okay, so you guys definitely have quite a bit of banter in your relationship

So at first it takes him a minute to figure out when you're actually being serious

"Kyle, you're so pretty."

He'll just blink at you for a second

When you don't give him a teasing smirk or burst out laughing, that's when he knows you're being real

And then his cheeks turn a few shades darker, and he looks away bashfully

He'll mutter something semi-coherently, not looking at you at all while he says it:

"Yeah, well... you're prettier..."

It's not that he doesn't believe what you say, or that he's embarrassed, he's just taken off guard

He actually really loves when you surprise him like that

He will be thinking about it for the next week at least

He'll totally zone out, too—just replaying that moment over and over in his mind

A little smile comes to his lips involuntarily, and he might even start blushing a little

He's just got to be careful not to do it around the guys... he'd never hear the end of it

Stan

He's convinced you're being fake or joking at first

Especially if it just comes out of the blue

"I love you, Stan."

He'll just blink, waiting for the "just kidding" or the punchline

When it doesn't come his face scrunches up a little

"You're... being serious?"

He's not trying to sound rude, he's just having a hard time believing you

He struggles with insecurity :(

No matter how long you've been together, he still doesn't know why someone like you would ever love him

But when you just smile sincerely and tell him that yes, you are being serious, his heart flutters

He definitely gets that huge lovesick grin of his (you know the one)

And he'll look at you with the purest loving gaze

Be prepared for a bear hug :D

And maybe some happy tears on your shoulder

Butters

It doesn't even occur to him that you might be joking

He believes everything you say, unless it's ultra-obvious you're joking

And even then he's more inclined to take whatever you're saying/doing as genuine, if only for his own delusional enjoyment

So, even if it comes out of nowhere, Butters accepts your affection

"You're the best thing in my life, Butters."

He'll put on a huge grin, taking your hand and squeezing it excitedly

"You're my favorite ever, Y/n!"

Cue the tooth-rotting fluff

This is how you two often fall into bouts of sickeningly sweet affection; cuddling, hand holding, "no-I-love-you-more" competitions...

It is very cheesy

But Butters LIVES for it

He loves it when you can both be all genuine like that; it increases his own confidence, plus it gives him a chance to show his unending love for you :)

Kenny

I feel like Kenny's really good about reading your emotions

And matching them as soon as he's aware

So even if you're in the middle of the goofiest goof session, he'll flip the switch just as quick as you

He'll know you're being genuine right away, and wastes no time being dumbfounded or anything

"I'm so in love with you."

You can see his cheeks going a little pink, but he smiles the brightest smile and hugs you tight

Then he returns the affection in full; both physically and verbally

It doesn't matter if you were being verbal or physical with your affection, he'll give you both in return

"I'm in love with you, too."

Depending on if you're in a silly affectionate or serious affectionate mood (again, he'll know), you may or may not end up in a hybrid cuddle-tickle fight

Otherwise you'll settle down somewhere and just bask in each other's arms

Maybe playing with each other's hair, mumbling sweet nothings, listening to heartbeats and breathing

Cartman

He is NOT going to take you seriously (or at least that's how it'll seem)

Even when he realizes that you are, indeed, being serious, he's going to make fun of you

"I love you more than you even know."

He tries to play off the way his cheeks turn pink and the way his heart flutters

He'll look away, waving his hand dismissively at you

"Pff, whatever. You're so cheesy, Y/n."

In reality, he's internalizing what you said and it's getting him higher than the moon

And he can't help just hugging you, at the very least

Or pretending to suplex you as an excuse to get you laying on top of him with his arms around your waist

Then he'll start to think about what you said more, and after a while he'll mutter, almost inaudibly:

"I love you more, stupid."

He'll never admit that he said it (activate gaslighting mode), but he secretly hopes that you really did hear it, and that you believe he said it (despite what he'll try to make you believe)

Because he meant it, and he wants you to know that he feels the same about you :)

Thanks for this request! And thank you so much for reading, take care doves <33

(divider by saradika)

[se0nghwaaa]

🦩 being in the main 4s friend group !! (fluff obvi) ☀️

if u get a crush, be prepared to here 2 diff things.

“y/n how many times have i told u, stop being delulu” from cartman and kenny

and then

“y/n don’t listen to them, yeah u should shoot ur shot!” from stan and kyle

imagine ft calls at like 11:36 pm.. ON SUMMER BREAK TOO

“hey y/n i’m jealous of ur heart.” -kenny

“and why is that 🤨” -y/n

“because it’s pounding inside of u and i’m not.” *white tee by summer walker starts playing* -kenny

“W RIZZ🔥🔥🔥🔥” -cartman

*kyle and stan just privately texting each other*

imagine y’all did talent shows and like one of y’all is a judge.. LMAOO

“alr next is kenny mcormick.” -kyle

*body by megan thee stallion starts playing*

“BODY YADYYADYADY” -kenny

“ur fucking weird… next.” -kyle

* u and cartman r rofl while stan records *

don’t ask why but kenny would smack ur ass like randomly. like when he’s behind u and he realizes he has the chance to smack that dumptruck of urs hes gonna do it.

*smack*

“OW WTF KENNY?..” -y/n

“it wasn’t me it was kyle!” -kenny

“r u serious rn.” -kyle

y’all go over to kyles to study! (y’all never study)

“look at how ___ looks rn😭” -y/n

“they look like a dehydrated horse.” -cartman

“can y’all actually do work instead of copying me.” -kyle

“sowwy kylie wylie… i didn’t mean to….” -y/n

“get out of my house rn.” -kyle

_____

im sorry that’s all u guys get😭..

requests r open *giggles cutely*

[steggyisnthere]

HCs of what it would be like dating the main 4+ butters Fem!Reader

(characters aged up to 16-17)

word count (607)

warnings - a couple swear words and a bit of suggestiveness

🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

stan 💙🌿💨

he would definitely tease you a lot, but lovingly for sure

‘y/n you’re so stupid’

‘my stupid tho...’

he would be okay with a little bit of PDA in public, like holding hands or a small peck before class but anything else will legit make him puke lol

he’d be a bit hesitant to introduce you to his family, because of Shelly and Randy but yk he would do it eventually

If you don't like him smoking, wouldn’t do it near you <3

would defo talk to you about the most stupid things but you two were chill with that

dates would be a lot of movie nights, in and out 💙

calls you ‘babe’ or your nickname, ‘

kyle ��️💚🏀

Kyle would try to be really romantic and want you to feel comfortable in your relationship 

he’d try to be THAT guy because he’s a bit worried you might leave him

he likes some PDA in public like holding hands, leaning on shoulders, and kissing but he would be WAY more cuddly in private

he wouldn’t mind introducing you to his family at ALL, Shelia legit loves you the first time you meet

you two would talk about deep sentimental things a lot of the time, to be honest

for dates, you two would like to read in together or go to the library, and sometimes breakfast or brunch dates 💚

he would call you ‘love, honey, sweetheart’ and if you were fortunate ‘darling’

Kenny 🧡🐈‍🧸

Kenny defo the biggest dirty mind out of all of these guys

he is so overconfident with his rizz it’s hilarious 💀 

‘hey babe, are you a highway cuz I wanna ride you all night i lost my phone number, can I have yours instead?’

LIVES FOR PDA, bro is all over you, smooching, hugging, holding your arm, hugging, public and private 

would also be hesitant to introduce you to the fam because of how poor he is 😭 

if you get along with Karen tho, he’s gonna be so happy 

you two talk about a lot of sex-related stuff, like ‘how do girls even jerk off’ but you two are very open-minded about it, don’t worry

If you don't like him smoking, will try his best not to do it in front of you

For dates, you and Kenny would go to the park or some cheap-ass diner (all he can afford is the water but it’s the thought that counts, right?)

He would call you the most ridiculous names to annoy you ‘pookie, honey-babe, sexy, wifey’ but would mostly call you ‘babe.’

Eric ❤️🍟🍗

He’s mean to you, but deep down he really loves you, promise

Thinks you and him are the shit, for real

PDA is a no unless he’s trying to be nice, but in private he won’t mind a few kisses and cuddles here and there

Won’t be bothered to introduce you to Liane unless you asked first because he is a lazy piece of shit

You two talk shiz about EVERYONE at school

Ya’ll are either feared as a couple or like ‘wtf how did they get together’

For dates, he’d take you out to eat or you’d play Roblox and bully kids together <3

He would call you your normal name, but sometimes, just sometimes he calls you ‘babe’

Butters 🧈 🦋 💙

He is the sweetest most innocent boyfriend everrrrr 😭

Will always be around, a little needy at times

PDA, he’s all for it. Butters is all over you, hugging and kissing and always holding your hand aww

Is also hesitant to introduce you to his family because his parents are fkn idiots meany poos

You guys talk about Hello Kitty and literally everything nice under the sun

Practices how to ask you on dates in the mirror-

He would take you to the park to go on a walk, and sometimes to the movies too <3

He would call you your name or sometimes ‘lovely’ because that's what he does best

[bunnihoshiki]

★ (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ 𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐃𝐎

🐰 . . 𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 ⋆ None

💭 . . 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠/𝐬 ⋆ The main 4, CATG x Reader

🐰 . . 𝐒𝐲𝐩𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐬 ⋆ Basically what it said in the title!

💭 . . 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠/𝐬 ⋆!! All aged up and this can be seen as romantic or platonic but cartman's part is strictly platonic !! very ooc but aside from that there's none!

🐰 . . 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞 ⋆ hoshiki loves this prompt! He will be making this but in another fandom soon

Navi | Masterlist

𝐊𝐲𝐥𝐞 𝐁𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐬𝐤𝐢

Sends Candy crush requests on Facebook. I just have that feeling

He would wake you up 2 hours early before school to make sure you don't come late. Also lies about the time to wake you up easier...

Also turns off your fan when you aren't waking up

He definitely points out grammatical errors or the spelling of someone💀

Probably tags everyone he knows in a Facebook post

Keeps his phone sound notif on

Always asking his mom for permission, yes he also asks permission to hang out with you

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𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐧 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐬𝐡

missed calls. Always.

Replies with a thumbs up and in rare occasion replies with K or Hmm

Borrows your charger.

Never returns it.

Listens to songs in a really loud volume to sound cool

Finishes the leftovers and puts the container back, don't blame him, it's a force of habit

Leaves the door open since he has a sister to do that to and does it so much to the point it's normal

─────────────────────────────────

𝐄𝐫𝐢𝐜 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐧

Takes your phone without permission and uses it for HOURS, like full on texting your friends and checking your browser history/gallery

and when he gives it back to you it's always on 1%

Did I forget to mention he also took your charger

Farts infront of you

Eats your food when you aren't looking and lies about not eating it despite having crust around his lips

Feel lonely with 69 others on facebook

He sings to a song like hes at some kind of talent show

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𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐌𝐜𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐜𝐤

Begs for likes and fame

Uses all caps

Steals your cologne/perfume and uses it until there's one drop left

Tries to sneak in the middle of the line instead of going to the back then claims he was saving time

Sometimes he accidentally makes himself too comfortable at your house

Throws a pencil at someone and say he dropped it

𝐂𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐠 𝐓𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫

Leaves you on read or takes days to respond

Doesn't hold the door for the person behind him

Takes up both armrests or takes the whole couch to himself

I don't think he'll even return his shopping cart

Cuts people off on the sidewalk while he's walking to piss them off

He would "accidentally" snap a pencil that he borrowed not because he hates the person but because he felt like it

Would also probably enter your room, stand there for a few minutes, then leave

Leaves the door open 2

─────────────────────────────────

𝐓𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐤 𝐓𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐤

Eats loudly. Like he chews loud with his mouth open

He doesn't know what he wants to order when it's his turn.

Ends up getting one of his friends to order for him

Sends a series of text instead of a long one

He will borrow a pencil and then brings it home with him. No he doesn't realize that

Sucks out of a straw even when nothings left in the cup

─────────────────────────────────

𝐉𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐲 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐦𝐞𝐫

I think he'd invite himself to plans he wasnt part of

He'd follow you when he's bored

Also sings an annoying song on repeat when he's bored. It alway takes HOURS due to his stuttering and you'd have to wait through all of it.

Goes into a Walmart at midnight to asks if it's hammer time to all of the employees as a joke. I don't think they like the joke tho

Makes up weird sayings, writes it on a sticky note and post it throughout the town.

In social studies he'd joke about other countries

Pretends to tell jokes to his pencil

─────────────────────────────────

𝐂𝐥𝐲𝐝𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐧

Accidentally humblebrags to you

It's canon that he leaves the toilet seat up.

Probably doesn't even change the toilet paper roll too

Talks while a movie is playing

Complains instead of trying to find a solution, ends up resolving on its own anyways.

Definitely, 100% gushes about his new relationship

On the last day of school, he would celebrate loud and obnoxiously after he exits

Calls an "important" friend group meeting and then asks "does this colour look good on me?"

─────────────────────────────────

𝐓𝐨𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐞𝐧 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤

Sometimes he accidentally turns passive-agressive

Talks like a baby to all the animals he sees, force of habit too btw

Writes a poem and always sends it to you in mail

Tweets pictures of random animals.

Leans on your head when you're shorter

Uses big words and doesn't explain it to someone

Wins every game night with the gang so much he pretty much gets waited out the entire game after that

─────────────────────────────────

© 𝐁𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐤𝐢 2023 do not repost, copy or modify without my permission. All rights reserved.

[hannah-h-pleb]

Back with some more Cartman content because I love him 🤭

I’m going to give y’all some “Bully Cartman” headcanons. This is basically a scenario in which Cartman bullies you but only because you make him, “frustrated” if you catch my drift

Once again, everyone depicted in this is 18, so this will take place in late high school. Reader is female (or AFAB). There will be NSFW content so minors, dni

Bully! Eric Cartman x Reader Headcanons

Content Warning: NSFW content (minors dni), aged up character

In a scenario where Eric bullies you, just know that he doesn’t actually hate you, he hates what you DO to him

He watches you and how you interact with others. How you laugh with them, how you let loose and act all silly, how you smile with them, it disgusts him. Because you’re not doing it with HIM

It doesn’t help that you’re as attractive as you are either. He glares at you while staring you up and down. He likes what he sees, but that bulge in the front of his pants gets painful after awhile. You get him so turned on it hurts and you’re not even trying

Can imagine late at night when he’s thinking about you, he’s jacking himself off with a scowl on his face muttering about how stupid you are and whispering “I hate you…mh..I hate you” over and over until he cums all over himself. That’s when he finally draws the conclusion that he’s indeed attracted to you…

So, instead of taking a rational approach and trying to get your attention by acts of kindness or trying to initiate a conversation, he starts to act like a dick towards you to get your attention

How he does it varies day by day. One day as you’re passing him in the hallway he might knock your books out of your hand and tell you to “Just pick them up, it’s not fucking rocket science”, another day he might trip you as you’re walking to your desk and go “Aww, did the stupid bitch fall down and hurt herself?”

Hes not BRUTAL towards you, but he definitely harasses you every chance he gets. Here’s what he doesn’t realize though: While he’s acting like a pure ass (because he’s sexually frustrated af), you’re absolutely eating it up

You had secretly thought Eric was a very good looking guy despite how he acted towards people. But when he began to target you, that only added fuel to the fire. There was something about how cruel he could be towards you that gave you butterflies

In a way, he was winning. He had gotten into your head which is exactly what he wanted. What he didn’t account for was that you were going to play his game with him

So you fight back and mouth him off. Oh boy. He didn’t like that. Well, he did but only because it spurred him on even more knowing he was getting to you. What he didn’t like however, was how you were trying to take back power that was his

Can imagine that at some point he shouted “RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH” at you and you responded with, “Fuck your fucking authority 🙄✋” (you don’t know who you’re messing with do you.)

Eventually he finds out he’s right, you do like him back. And in true Cartman fashion he would devise a plan to get you alone and make you his (and force you into submission). And when he does…

He degrades you. He spanks you and smacks you around. Bites you. Chokes you out with his hands, and his cock. Absolutely ruins you by any means necessary. Most of all…he makes you cry. Whether it be by edging you or overstimulating you to the point of which you become so overwhelmed with pleasure that all you can do is cry and babble about how it’s “too good”, he will ruin you and he just loves it (corruption. kink.)

Remember how I said he’d make you get off on his shoe? Well, in this case he would probably say something about you being so desperate for him that you’d get off on his shoe. And when you do, oh best believe he won’t let you live it down

Don’t think he won’t punish you for all the times you mouthed him off either. Through orgasm denial yes, but he would make you cum on one of his toys before he fucks you because “only good sluts get his dick” (Harley you inspired this one too I know you’re reading 🥰)

“Awww, you DO like me~” he would whisper as you moan out when he slowly slides his cock inside you

Pulls on your hair as he takes you from the back. Leans down and gives you hickies all over your neck. He wants people to ask you about them so you’ll get all embarrassed before telling them who gave them to you. He wants people to know it was him and you were his

As he fucks you he would remind you that you’re just a needy little slut who loves his cock. Not only does he bully you in school, but he’s a bully in bed too. He would mock you for even wanting him, someone who was oh so cruel to you, and he would remind you who had all the power. Who made you feel good. Who owned you. And it was him

Wooooo. Definitely feed y’all a whole meal here. I had even more written than this but I had to cut out lots because it was super long. Needless to say a one shot is definitely in order so stay tuned 🤭

[cloudy-skyes]

General Main 4 Headcanons

Notes: Hi Harleyy <33 Sorry I accidentally lost your actual request (thank god i screenshotted it) Thank you for the request :)

Warnings: Slightly suggestive, smoking (Kenny)

Relationship: Established romantic relationship

Gender: Gender neutral, no pronouns mentioned

Kyle:

Not only is Kyle an amazing boyfriend, he’s also an amazing study buddy with you. If you’re struggling with homework or you have an upcoming test, you two will have a study date at one of your houses.

These dates often include you being held in his lap, while he points at homework/test questions and explains them to you.

Breaks are always important in studying though!! So when you two get sick of studying, you have cuddle sessions where you calmly run your fingers through his curly hair.

Speaking of his hair, he secretly LOVES it when you play with his hair. Kyle won’t let anyone else touch it but you. It’s just something about your touch that is so relaxing to him.

He is SUCH a gentleman. He’s the type to hold doors open for you, pull seats out for you, and other acts of service. He likes holding your hand in his own hands and kissing your knuckles. It’s a little bit cliche but it still makes you feel so loved.

Kyle adores it when you get along with his little brother, Ike. He’s such a family oriented person, so seeing you play with Ike makes his heart flutter with adoration. Ike totally acted like Kyle’s wingman before you and Kyle started dating too.

Kyle tends to have a short temper, especially with Cartman. He looks to you as a source of serenity when he needs to calm down. I swear if you just hold him and give him a kiss it soothes him right away.

Kyle also has some abandonment issues because of his history with failed relationships. Please just reassure him every now and then that you love him, he loves you too <3

Stan:

First off, Stan is absolutely head over heels for you. He loves being around you. He’s practically living at your house at this point, he’d rather be with you than at the farm with his dad.

Stan does struggle with depression, and goes through depressive episodes pretty often. You know it isn’t your responsibility to care for him, you do anyways. He always tries his best for you so you return the favor by being there for him.

This includes SOO many cuddle sessions. When he’s cradled in your arms, one wrapped around his torso and the other gently holding his head in your shoulder, he feels much better.

Stan also plays the guitar, he often brings his guitar over to your house and plays songs for you. Sometimes he’ll even have you sit on his lap, his guitar on your own, and guide your hands with his to learn to play the guitar :)

He’s also a HORRIBLE texter. It’s a little bit ironic because he shows his affection to you constantly in person, but this guy cannot get any more dry over text with you. That’s why he prefers to hang out in person anyways.

Stan has gotten better with his vomiting issues over the years, but he still struggles to hold back nausea when he’s with you. He’s just so overwhelmed with how much he loves you that he can’t help it.

Despite the fact that Stan cannot stand his dad, Randy ADORES you. His son? Got a girlfriend?? He tries so hard to be friends with you (and sell you weed). Stan always tries to get his dad to knock it off, ashamed by Randy’s antics, but Randy doesn’t really care. Even though Stan’s dad is super overbearing, at least you’re always welcome at the Marsh house.

Kenny:

I’m sure we’re all aware of this by now, but Kenny is SUCH a flirt. Even before you two were together he was constantly dropping flirty and suggestive lines on you.

Occasionally, when you and Kenny are hanging out with other friends, he’ll lean into you and whisper the most suggestive shit into your ear and then continue to act like he never said anything to you.

Kenny is also very physically affectionate, when he’s with you he’s always touching you, but he’s usually just holding your hand. He probably does that thing where he swings his arm back and forth while walking and holding your hand and it’s really cute.

Like Stan, Kenny is with you most of the time. He loves you so much and he literally cannot get himself away from you. He finds himself often escaping his shitty home life to go hang out with you.

You and Kenny also become smoke buddies. Usually when you’re over at his house you chill in his room and share a joint, and talk about whatever comes to your mind. He thinks it’s so fun to get high with you.

But when you’re not in his room smoking, you find yourself playing with Karen. Karen sees you as an older sister figure and looks up to you so much. Kenny is so protective over Karen, so when he sees you two doing something cute like playing dolls, he knows he found the best s/o he could possibly have.

Kenny is really generous, and although he’s poor, he does his best to spoil you. He still works at City Wok, and he uses his extra money to get both you and Karen gifts. Besides physical affection, this is one of his biggest ways to show his love for you :)

Cartman:

Your relationship with Cartman is the type where both of you can insult and bully each other as a form of affection. Sometimes it sounds so real that others are unsure if you love or hate each other, but you two both know well that it’s the first option.

Cartman will hit you with an insult, and you return one right back to him. Maybe that’s why you two are so close? Since you can tolerate Cartman’s crude humor and behavior and reciprocate it right back to him he fell for you.

Nobody really has ever enjoyed being bothered by him except you. Cartman LOVES anyone who understands his humor and plays along with his banter, especially when other people like Kyle or Butters are involved.

Cartman takes you out to KFC and other restaurants on the regular. One time he even convinced his mom to buy tickets for the both of you to go to Casa Bonita. That date was definitely one of his favorites with you.

You’re good at calming Cartman down when his anger issues get out of hand. When he starts taking arguments with his classmates too far, you’re there to help cool him down. You’re often his source of sense when he’s too upset to think clearly.

If you ever give Cartman any gifts, no matter what it is, he will always keep it around. He’ll treasure it as much as he treasured his stuffed animals from elementary school. He’d have a shelf of his bookcase dedicated to things you’ve made for him or gave him, and he thinks of them very fondly.

His mom is surprised that Cartman found someone he gets along so well with, and you manage to keep his temper in check better than anyone else has. She loves having you around, you treat her and her son so kindly after all.

[nwjn-z]

𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 - 𝐌𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝟒

warning(s): none

authors note: i was feeling really down about myself so i made these (so i did project on the first one lol), let me know if these cheered you up!

⭑ small chest - kyle broflovski

He honestly doesn’t understand why you are insecure about your chest. He just doesn’t get it bc he’s always thought your chest was cute. He always encourages you to wear low cut tops, body hugging dresses, or whatever it is you are insecure about wearing bc of your chest. Loves seeing the shy look on your face when he tells you that you look pretty when you wear something that reveals your chest a little more. Kyle reminds you all the time how much he loves your body and so should you.

⭑ hip dips - stan marsh

He is so obsessed with your hips. Loves just staring at you when you wear something tight fitting, he just can’t take his eyes off you. He panicked when you told him that his staring made it seem like he was judging you. He literally felt a pain in his chest when you thought he was judging you. Reassures you all the time that he loves your hips by hugging you from behind and rubbing his calloused hands over them.

⭑ scars/stretch marks - kenny mccormick

He also has lots of scars and even a couple stretches marks and he doesn’t see anything wrong with them. He loves tracing and caressing the stretch marks you have (especially if you have some on your chest), and giving all the cuts and scrapes you have kisses. Kenny isn’t a man of many words so he likes physically showing how much he loves all aspects of you.

⭑ being chubby - eric cartman

I know, i know this one sounds cliche BUT hear me out. He’s never viewed your weight as a bad thing if anything he prefers you to be chubby. he likes having someone he can be a foodie with. like most things, he would never admit how much he loves your plush figure but he will physically tell you by laying his head down on your thighs and kneading the softness of your tummy and thighs when you cuddle.

[halliestinks]

Random silly texts between the main 4

a/n; this is just for fun, you can take these as either platonic or romantic !! (they are the grey texts) (part 2) (part 3)

stan marsh

kyle broflovski

kenny mccormick

eric cartman

[maxs-extra-clutter]

Happy birthday Eric!❤️

[oldwritingm]

Hi!! I wanted to ask a reader with abusive parents and the main 4 reacting to this

Sure thing!

National child abuse hotline: 800-422-4453 / National domestic violence hotline: 800-799-7233

TW for (implied) abuse!!

South Park - Main Four With a Partner Who Has Abusive Parents

Stan

He understands the struggle

Honestly he’d be the best out of the four to vent to about this, he can absolutely empathize

And you can empathize with him when he needs to vent

You also share tricks that you use to avoid the abuse

Whenever it gets to be too much, you both sneak out and meet at Stark Pond

You don’t always talk when this happens, because sometimes you just need some silence and a hand to hold

Oftentimes you’ll vouch for each other in public when you try to hide it

And you’ll help change the subject

“Oh, that bruise? I just fell down the stairs.”

“Yeah, I was there. Okay, new subject—”

But deep down you both know the truth

If/when you finally decide to tell someone about what’s going on at home, you have a pact to do it together

Kyle

He invites you over a lot just to get you away from home

And when he walks you home he goes veerrry slow

He’s constantly reminding you that you can always come to his place whenever you need

When you vent to him, he SEETHES

He HATES your parents

He has refused to meet them on multiple occasions

“Wanna come inside for a snack?”

“Are your parents home?”

“I think so.”

“Then no.”

Will absolutely indulge you in making “hypothetical” plots to violently murder them

He wants you to get help, but won’t push you

He has offered to help you speak up about it though

In the meantime he just wants to always be there for you and offer a safe space

Kenny

He also empathizes with what you’re going through

He knows his house isn’t that much better, but he’ll still invite you over when you need to get away

Goofing off with him and Karen usually cheers you up

If that doesn’t do the trick, Kenny loves to cuddle you while you vent

It does make him sad, but he just holds you tighter and reiterates how much he cares for you

“I’m so sorry baby. You don’t deserve that. You deserve the world.”

The few times he’s been around your parents, you’ve noticed him glaring at them with clenched fists

He really wants to punch them

He won’t though, he knows that’ll just make it worse for you

Whenever you tell him something particularly shocking, he tries to convince you to get help

Gets a little frustrated when you decline, but knows that you’ll do it when you’re ready

He just doesn’t like seeing you suffer :(

Cartman

Out of the main four, he empathizes the least with your situation

Genuinely doesn’t understand why you “let” it continue

“Why do you let them treat you like that?”

“It’s not that simple, Eric.”

“Do you want me to do it for you?”

“…Do what?”

“Kill them. Torture them. Whatever. I dunno.”

“Pfff—”

Unfortunately, he’s more bark than bite; if you agree to let him “help,” he’ll most likely chicken out when he actually meets your parents

When he bosses his mom around, he’ll tell you to take some notes

This both baffles and amuses you

He’ll only ask you to get professional help once; he’ll drop it if you decline

He’ll listen to you vent, but the most he can do in terms of comfort is say “that’s stupid/messed up” and give you snacks

He does use your situation as an excuse to have you over like. All the time

Thank you for this request! And thanks for reading, stay safe guys <33

National child abuse hotline: 800-422-4453 / National domestic violence hotline: 800-799-7233

(divider by saradika)

[weridpersonhelp]

pariings south park stans gang

Kyle: she fell first he fell harder. nerd and band geek, angry and sweet innocent roll. Friends to lovers. . give random things and collect them. prince charming easily flustered, dumb but smart x smart but dumb. Shy/insecure x think they're incredible.

Stan: moon x sun, giant calm short gremlin, childhood friends to lovers, literal god x-tired collage student, likes tea x loves coffee, loves cats x loves dogs. the mum and dad friend. hates talking to people and is the one exception. depressed x i would die for you. Warm hands x cold hands.

Kenny: Wide eyed and cruious x the cool one that admires them, does make up x lets them, strangers to lovers, two idiots, inaproiate x angry and trying not to laugh, love langue is gist giving x cuddel forever. warm hands x cold hands. shy awkard x LOOK AT MY PARTNER!

Cartman: Enemies to lovers, golden retiver x chihuahua, ray of sunshine x literal devil. evil crime duo, shy idiot x loud idiot, chaotic duo

comment to add some or to pick your favriot

[local-new-kid-super]

Raccoon/Eric Cartman x Hero!New Kid

"Power couple"

Featuring: Eric Cartman, the New Kid, and guest star Liane Cartman!

Warnings: Coerced relationship, I guess abuse of power if you read into it, but no one takes The Raccoon seriously so I wouldn't take it to seriously, New Kid.

Synopsis: Leader of the Raccoon and Friends franchise, The Raccoon, has called you on your comm (home phone) to tell you of a super last minute meeting. However, it's quickly becomes obvious he's only invited you, and not because of an 'emergency'.

A/N: I'm back!

"Ah, New Kid. About time, please take a seat at my impressive new table set up." Eric Cartman, donned in Raccoon garb, motions to the second folding table he managed to get into his mom's basement. Admittedly, two tables is more.impressive than one, but you can't help but feel like the Freedom Pals probably have a nicer set up as far as a meeting table. "Hey! I said sit down, god, are you fucking deaf?" He kicks the metal chair next to him, and you take a seat awkwardly. Even with no one else around, he insists at sitting at the head of the table.

"Where is everyone?" You ask, adjusting your hero mask as you glance around the empty cave/basement. "I mean, didn't you comm for an emergency meeting?"

"Not quite, New Kid. I'm afraid this was a ruse." He puts a clawed glove to his mask, grinning smugly. "Thats right, this is a private meeting with the Raccoon himself, I'm sure you're honored but hold your thanks." You roll your eyes and remain silent.

He suddenly grows serious, folding his hands to intertwine while his lowers his brows. His elbows rest on the table, the air thick with tension. "However, this is still an emergency. The Freedom Pals have been real dickbags lately, New Kid. As I'm sure you've noticed, they recently got some decent coverage in the 'South Park Times' for finding that missing kindergartener in the park. It's stupid, of course, kid wasn't even kidnapped. Just wandered off like a fucking idiot-" He slams his hand on the table, but then takes a breath. "But, that's only part of why we're here. We need big moves, New Kid. Big changes."

Hopping from the creaky metal chair and hitting the floor with a 'thud', he grabs a rolled up piece of poster paper from a nearby cabinet, which you know to be his franchise plan. Unraveling it, it's filled with a web of movies and shows, including 'The Raccoon and Friends Civil war', 'Rise of Chaos', and 'Fastpass: a new beginning.' "So, what are you thinking?" You ask, leaning forward to look at the well crafted board. "Another miniseries, or maybe a Civil war? You seem to really like the block busters."

"I admire the tenacity, New Kid. Your drive to make the franchise a shitload of money is one of the reasons you're perfect for the team, but those ideas-" He leans in, hand dramatically over his heart like he's feigning pity. "Are fucking stupid. Stop talking and listen to the genius plan I've already concocted." You just sigh, frown spreading as you lean back. Your chair makes a squeak, heavy with your now relaxed posture of nonchalance.

"A power couple. All great franchises have them." He grabs a few poorly but out comic panels from his pocket, crumpled and stained with what looks like 'Cheesy Poof' dust. You wince in disgust. "Batman and Catwoman." He holds up a panel. "Superman and Lois Lane," Another. "Aquaman and fish-"

"What?" You cut him off. "Aquaman isn't in love with fish, he's just from Atlantis?" You tilt your head in confusion.

"What? Obviously he's fucking the fish, he can talk to them." He scoffs. "What normal guy who can talk to fish, and spends all his time with fish, and has no women in his comics, wouldn't be with a fish. A gay fucking fish and Aquaman." He says this heinous stuff as if it's the most reasonable thing in the world. "Just stop interrupting, New Kid. I pay you for hero work-"

"You don't pay me-"

"SHUT up! Jesus christ, its like having Kyle in the cave god-" he rubs his forehead, then takes another dramatic, calming breath. "What I'm saying is, Power couples. We need one. And i have run all the numbers." He makes some fake bleeps and bloops at the cardboard super computer with his Toshiba Handi-book taped on. "Compatibaility wise, you and me are the perfect match. See, I'm the leader, and you're the new kid. It would bring more attention to your pwrsona while keeping me at the front." He turns back to you as he clicks off the Handi-book. "I'm sure you're thrilled, I'm an absolute stud." He pouts out his lips in an attempt to make you more... enticed?

"What? Cartman, no, I'm not gonna date you!" You exclaim, pushing your chair back a bit. "You're like, a dick all the time! To everyone."

He seems genuinely shocked you're turning him down, immediately flying into a typical Cartman tantrum. "What? I speak the truth, what happened to free fucking speech!" He rants. "And you've been given a lot of special treatment, by the way. I let you multi-class, I gave the the number for the direct line to the Raccoon cave!"

"You use it to send me pics of you that you think made you 'look ripped'. Is this actually about the franchise, or have you been trying to hit on me for a while?"

"If anything, you're crushing on me!" He sputters, pointing an accusatory finger at you. "I mean, you're the one who likes all of my totally ripped pics. That's creepy. And you're drinking from a bottle with my face on it." He points to the 'officially' licenesed Racoon and friends bottle.

"You gave these to everyone-"

"Just say yes!" He sputter, his face actually a bit red, though you're sure part of that is from anger. Cartman doesn't beg, he manipulates, so to see him actually want something he can't have is amusing. "Just- just say yes, and we'll make a ton of money, and everyone will want to know all about our relationship. We can be on magazines, and I'll even take you on one monthly sponsored Raccoon and Friends trip to Casa Bonita. How's that sound?"

"No."

"What the FUCK? What's wrong with that, it's Casa Bonita?!"

"That sounds like a date." You argue. "Why can't you date one of the other heroes for your power couple?"

"I'm not gonna be with Fastpass, I hate comedians. Kyle's a Jew, gross, Clydes a crybaby bitch, and Craig is actually gay which would make it weird. I'm not asking that much, we pose for pictures, say we're dating, and get famous!" He exclaims, fists balled up as he glances away for a second. "... and hold hands in school all the time in front of the guys." He mumbles under his breath.

"What?"

"What?" He responds. "First your deaf, now you're hearing things. Look, I offered to be nice, but now you're pissing me off, New Kid. We date, or you're out of the franchise. Clearly you're not as dedicated as I thought you were if you can't see the financial genius behind this plan." He tilts his chin up, posing with nonchalance in an attempt to feel like he has the upper hand. "And if you're not a hero, you're a villain. You really want to make me have the team kick your ass? You wanna be all chummy with Chaos, cause that's what's gonna happen."

You frown, suddenly feeling discomfort creep up your spine, the basement/Raccoon cave feeling more claustrophobic suddenly. You heard Cartman has done some awful things, but he's always laid off of you for the most part. You guess his apparent crush must've been why. You just moved here. You need friends, your home life is shitty. You can't risk pissing him off and losing the little hero team you actually like being on despite it all. "Fine." You mumble. "Okay, you win."

He perks up, throwing a free arm over your shoulder. "Great! I knew you'd see it my way, New Kid. Come on, we'll take some photos for press releases, I'm sure they'll be calling soon, then hit the town. Get some Ice Cream and flex our power-couple status." He immediately grabs your hand, but not in a way that reads as particularly affectionate, more possessive. Its an iron grip, and the slight claws of his gloves leave little red marks on your palm. You just sigh.

"Hey meeeeeehm!" He yells up the stairs. "I need some money!"

"What for, pookums?" Liane calls down, chipper as ever from her spot upstairs.

"I'm in a power couple mehm, god!" He groans. "Just bring down some money, were going out! And take some photos to Staples and have them make copies!" He screeches, urning back to you and shaking his head. "Fucking bitch..."

Meanwhile, upstairs, Liane sigs for some money from her purse. "Hmm hmm hmm, how nice! I'm so glad Eric asked out his little friend!" She hums to herself. "I told him to go for it, and he did! I'm rubbing off on my little Eric!"

[ava-imagines]

Hello! Can I request a South Park headcanon of the four main boys (Stan, Kyle, Eric and Kenny) with a reader who is a transfer student and also happens to be a princess that comes from a royal family? (Sorry if this request is weird lol 😅)

Of course!!

Stan's gang x Royal!Reader: Does that mean you're rich? 💙💚❤🧡

Honestly, them finding out that you're part of a royal family makes them quite surprised

As Mr. Garrison was introducing you to the class, he decided to point out that you're from a royal family

Upon hearing this, the entire class was surprised and looked impressed, however, Stan and his friends hit it off with you right away!

Now, if you were to buy anything for any of them (as you're very rich), it's usually for Kenny as he's the poorest

He's so grateful honestly. Since he can't really pay you back, he decides he'll protect you as his superhero identity, Mysterion.

You don't really mind buying things for the others either

^ Okay it can get sort of annoying if you're shopping with Cartman but he tries paying you back with Cheesy Poofs and saying that you're way better than Kyle

Speaking of Kyle, whenever you offer to get him anything he'll usually decline as he'll feel pretty guilty. But even if you go ahead and buy something for him anyway, he'll try his best to save up enough money to pay you back

Onto Stan, he tries buying things for you too. And there's a major contrast in each other's presents. Like you'll be giving him a few expensive video games and he'll be giving you flowers and a plushie.

Now, back to you being royal, the boys make sure nobody's mean to you. Like, you're part of their friendgroup now!

For example, if somebody's accusing you of looking down on everyone else for being not as wealthy, Cartman will give them hell as Kyle and Kenny try holding him back and Stan tells you that they're just jealous

"Man, you're so kind getting us stuff dude!"

"Yeah, I'd do anything to pay you back!"

"You geys, they're sew tewtally awsum!!"

"Mmmph Mmf!!"