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ii. "think about my offer" - t.w.
pairing: female driver! x toto wolff
word count: 2.8k
warnings: cursing, eventual smut, drug & alcohol usage, power imbalances, age gap relationships, flirting, banter, yearning, use of fic tropes, yadayadayada the works
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sypnosis: with the second grand prix of the season well on its way, there is a lot at stake. not only with the race, but other matters as well.
darkness creeps into the motorhome, the lights of the team motorhomes and paddocks illuminating the space. all around you, everything was brushed with a soft white glow.
his fingers remain under your chin, forcing you to maintain eye contact. in the dim light, you can barely make out the glint swimming in his depths. what was it? desperation? anticipation? you weren’t sure.
toto was a complex man. you were well aware of that.
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧˖⁺‧₊˚♡
there were days where you would see him glowering around the mercedes paddock, engaged in heated exchanges with engineers. there were moments where you would watch a glimpse of his radiant grin, dimples and all, as mercedes would successfully place or land a podium. of course you had heard the stories about him and his outbursts. his mood seemed to change in a matter of seconds, especially these days.
well, could you really blame him?
mercedes had dominated the world of formula one for so long. with lewis hamilton earning eight world championships, breaking barriers and records along the way, mercedes was the top team. it was a team many drivers dreamed of racing for. when you entered the world of formula one, you could barely get one foot in without hearing the word mercedes or the name lewis hamilton.
that was until redbull had entered the picture in 2022.
now, they were struggling to even maintain second place. hell, there were some races where the team would barely make finish without crashing a car. or suffering from a malfunction.
mercedes was no longer the team. they were on the same level to ferrari and mclaren, fighting tooth and nail for those second and third spots on the podiums.
additionally, you couldn’t help but face the glaring facts. lewis hamilton was leaving mercedes once the 2024 season was complete. their integral driver, the one who had earned them their reputation, their titles, was making an exit.
was there something behind that? something more than the speculations and gossip?
however, you squeeze your eyes shut, sucking in a shaky breath.
“why do you want me on mercedes? these days i feel more like a liability to my team than an asset. i’m sure you just saw the spectacle in the press room.”
“because you’re an inspiration,” the notes in his tone are gentle, “you have inspired so many women to pursue their passions in the world of formula one. not just in terms of racing, but for mechanics, engineers, journalists. you have encouraged so many people to do what they love. you are confident. you know your talents and you utilize them. you have so much fucking potential and it makes me so irrationally angry that james does not see that.”
brows furrowing, your hand grasps toto’s wrist, pulling it away from your face, “does this have something to do with james? it’s common knowledge that you like to hold grudges, toto.”
the principal coughs slightly, “that may have something to do with it.”
“then my answer is no,” venom oozes out of your words, “i’m not some pawn to be used as a ‘fuck you’ to james for leaving mercedes. i’m not taking any part in that. i’m going to need you to leave.”
“that’s fine,” toto nods, responding coolly, “i figured you’d react this way. you are extremely close with james.”
“well no shit,” you mutter, pointing towards the door, “mr. wolff, i am going to ask you kindly once again. please leave.”
“i will,” placing a hand on your shoulder, toto locks eyes with you once more, “think about my deal, little dove. in the meantime, i’ll be waiting.”
“waiting for what?”
“if you’ll accept my deal,” his thumb massages along your collarbone, “you didn’t say yes, but you didn’t say no. i can tell you’re considering it.”
“you’re stubborn,” you retaliate, yet the pressure along your collarbone is relieving, the sore muscles relaxing, “they weren’t wrong about that.”
“i am quite the stubborn man, schatz,” toto can sense your exterior crumbling as his hand glides towards your shoulder blade, massaging gently.
“i know you’re manipulating me with your extremely good looks and nice hands.”
“and yet,” toto’s voice is low and he leans in, mouth hovering by your ear, “you’re falling for it.”
“are you flirting with me, toto wolff?”
“maybe i am,” his breath fans against your ear as his hand delves lower, fingertips brushing along your ribcage, “it seems to be working. look at you, nearly crumpling to your knees at my touch. how long has it been since a man has touched you like this, schatz?”
it takes everything in you not to let out a groan as his hand rests on the small of your back, “y-you need to leave.”
“i will this time,” he murmurs, “but consider my offer, little dove.”
a vibration on the countertop interrupts the principal. snapping out of your trance, you pluck your phone, the illuminated screen notifying you that you had a couple of missed calls, and numerous text messages.
one particularly caught your eye.
it was daniel.
i’m going to be on my way in five. i hope you’re okay. i know you probably don’t want to talk about the press conference very much, but we can just cuddle or something.
“oh fuck.”
toto towers over you, eyes scanning over your phone, “i take it that is my cue to leave.”
“your cue to leave was fifteen minutes ago,” your tone is dry, yet he cracks a smile.
“i hope you know i’m going to keep pestering you until you give me an answer. have a good night, little dove. i’ll see you around, yeah?”
“sure,” you respond. placing two hands on his back, you give him a small push, “you need to go before daniel thinks something weird is going on.”
“is he your boyfriend or something?” toto obliges to your action, the austrian beginning to stroll towards the door of the motorhome.
for him, the exit was merely a few strides. but fuck, was he sticking around. daniel was going to be there in a matter of seconds. who knew what would happen if they happened to cross paths.
similar to toto, daniel was not one to let things go.
“no!” you snap, “leaaaavveee!”
“fine, fine,” toto huffs, “think about my offer, schatz. i will see you around.”
as the principal slides out of the door, you bring a hand to your temple, massaging it.
what the actual fuck just happened?
seconds later, a series of knocks breaks the silence.
“come in!”
daniel peeks his head in, concern painting his features as he notices your state, “why are you still in your suit?”
shrugging you point to your phone, “i was in the middle of an intense phone call when you texted.”
“ah,” he opens the door, a bottle of wine in one hand, a bag in the other, “i brought food, if that’s all right? i figured you would need some after that prick grilled you in the press room.”
“can we talk about something else?” you groan, crossing over to the couch. you flop on it dramatically, earning a laugh from daniel.
“we could talk about how max adores you. i think kelly has some competition.”
“i wouldn’t say that,” you lift your head up, fighting a smile as daniel pulls a series of parcels from the bag, “what did you get?”
“something i knew the american would like,” he teases, ripping open a few wrappers, “a classic cheeseburger with fries. i hope they’re not soggy. i ordered it plain since i know how you are about condiments.”
“no shake with that?” you giggle, sitting up. wrapping your arms around daniel, you bury your head into his shoulder, “it’s a been a fucking day, let me tell you.”
“yeah?” he stuffs a fry in his mouth, “tell me about it.”
“well,” you’re tempted to spill every single detail about what just occurred merely minutes ago. however, as daniel’s gaze meets yours, you hesitate, “i’m concerned about my future with williams.”
“why do you say that?” his eyes narrow, brow furrowing, “you’ve never said anything like that till now. did something happen on the way back from the press conference?”
“no, no, no,” you respond a little too quickly, “i just – i don’t know. you of all people know how quickly things change in this environment and–”
“hey,” daniel lays a hand on your thigh, “i think you need some rest. you’ve had a real fucking busy day. we can talk about your future plans in the morning.”
“but what if i want to talk about them now?”
“you of all people know that i am not one to tell people what to do or how to live their lives,” daniel’s eyes harden, the words stern, “but you need to decompress. take your mind off racing for a minute. your life is not all about racing. you need to take care of yourself too.”
“i know,” you allow him to wrap an arm around your shoulders, bringing you in close, “it’s too much to think about sometimes.”
“tell me about it,” daniel places a peck on your temple as you nestle your head into his collarbone, “how about we eat, and maybe we can talk about it later?”
“sounds like a plan to me,” you nod, “hey, i have a question for you.”
“and that is?”
reaching for a box of fries, you fiddle with it, “are there speculations that we’re dating?”
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧˖⁺‧₊˚♡
“how do you think that went?”
james is to your right, tablet in hand. absentmindedly, you fiddle with the visor on your helmet, “all right.”
“just all right?” james queries, “you have pole position for tomorrow and you think that went just all right?”
“well,” you shrug, “we all know that max is going to overtake me, so i can’t be too hopeful.”
“such a pessimist,” james chuckles, placing a tender hand on your shoulder, “you don’t seem like you’re quite here today. i don’t want to press, but is something on your mind? you know you can tell me, right?”
there was quite a lot on your mind, actually.
in the days following the bahrain grand prix, it was almost as if your mind was a torrent of anxiety, fear, and numerous emotions. there were too many to decipher, constantly overwhelming you, distracting you from the matter at hand.
although you felt like you weren’t quite on this planet, you somehow managed to breeze past max in qualifying. it was only by hundredths of seconds, but it was a victory nonetheless. charles leclerc was behind max in the third position on the grid. alex was twelfth, which was not great but not terrible.
the encounter with toto was ever-present, consuming your thoughts whole. part of you wanted to confess the entire situation to james, but you knew that you had to keep it to yourself. this was no time to stir up any drama or rivalry between the two principals.
you couldn’t stop thinking about the way his hand drifted, how his voice shifted when he spoke to you. it was a far contrast from the way he spoke in interviews or to his drivers. it was rich yet husky, brimming with lust. there were gentle notes inflected in it as well, almost if he was admiring you. it was reminiscent of how one would speak of their favorite piece of artwork, or their most prized possession.
from his point of view, were you really a prize to be won? were you really that important? or were you the latter?
were you simply a pawn in his game?
the way he looked at you told you a different story.
there was no calculation. no coldness. there was no trace of the hardened, steely gaze he usually presented to his peers, to journalists, and to the general public.
there was simply a softness. as if you were one of his weak spots. you could remember him looking at you hungrily, as if he was taking in every single detail of the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
since the encounter in your motorhome, you had only bumped into the principal twice. once was on your entrance to the paddocks with james, where you exchanged formal greetings. the other was after the last practice session, where he congratulated you for your time, wishing you luck in qualifying.
the most odd aspect of it all was that you could count the number of exchanges you had with the principal on your fingers. most of it was formalities, either with the press lurking around, or when you attended events. there were no personal meetings before. it was all business or related to racing.
so he truly meant it when he had mentioned he had his eye on you for a while.
the only thing you could remember was an afterparty after the monaco grand prix in 2023. although max had won the race, both lewis and george had placed fourth and fifth. those were significant placements, especially on a track like monaco. you had placed eleventh, which was pretty monumental at the time.
around four a.m. at the afterparty, toto approached you. his face was flushed, cheeks tinged nearly crimson from the alcohol. the scent lingered on his breath, his hair was tousled, and a sheen of sweat clung to his skin. yet he was still utterly gorgeous, offering you a brilliant smile.
“i didn’t think the golden girl of formula one would make an appearance!”
“golden girl?”
“well of course,” he nodded fervently, the words slurred ever so slightly, “you shine like the sun. so that means you’re a golden girl!”
“mr. wolff,” your laughter was like bells, ringing so beautifully in the principals’ ears, “i think you’re pretty drunk.”
“let’s get a drink or two together. then you can really see that i’m not the big bad wolf.”
you ended up declining his offer, but he didn’t persist, leaving you to join daniel, lando, and oscar on the dancefloor. your heart was racing, and you were sure it had nothing to do with the pounding bass or alcohol consumption.
it was due to the fact that you had a tiny crush on the principal.
ever since you had sat behind the wheel of a race car, you were attracted to the principal. in your teenage years, you had dreamed of racing for mercedes, under the wing of toto. you swooned whenever you logged onto tumblr and read fanfics. you were nearly breathless every time you saw him pop up on your youtube feed.
fuck, even when you watched drive to survive on netflix, you couldn’t help but catch yourself rewinding back to the interviews with toto.
so when he offered to buy you a drink or two in monaco, you had to bite your tongue to say yes. when he entered your motorhome and had you pinned against the counter, you were a little weak in the knees. when he used little dove or schatz, it did leave your heart skipping a beat.
since that moment in monaco, things had been strictly professional. now, that line was starting to blur thanks to the motorhome incident. every time you noticed the principal, you could sense the tension in the air. it clouded nearly everything, thick and electric, sending a shiver down your spine every time the two of you locked eyes.
there was no doubt that the team principal was breathtaking. yet, he was almost thirty years older than you. additionally, you couldn’t help but think about the way the entire formula one world would react the moment they caught wind of mr. wolff and the american girl. the horrible treatment from the media would only skyrocket.
there was also the other elephant in the room.
after you asked daniel whether or not there were speculations the two of you were dating, he distanced himself. although he had said no, you couldn’t help but wonder if he wanted the world to think the two of you were together.
before, the two of you were almost inseparable. after alex, he was the first driver to welcome you to the world of formula one with open arms, often encouraging you, offering advice, and defending your name tirelessly. he was constantly reposting videos of you all over his social media, captioning them along the lines of, “look at my american girl go!” or “go best friend, that’s my best friend!”
of course, there were little rumors swirling around on social media that the two of you were an item. fans often made edits of the two of you, saying things like, “they’ll never tell us they’re dating but in my head they’re together” or “that aussie boy loves his american girl <3”
now, you found yourself distracted. too distracted. between the whole toto debacle, questioning your loyalty to williams, the benefits of joining mercedes, and daniel leaving you out high and dry, you were a mess.
a hot mess, at the very least.
to make matters worse, tomorrow was the biggest race of your season. if not, the biggest race of your life.
and god only knew what tomorrow was going to bring.
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧˖⁺‧₊˚♡
thank you so much for reading! let me know if you would like to be tagged! <3 this is going to be a multi-chapter series so buckle up y'all. it's about to get juicy!
#f1#formula 1#toto wolff#toto wolff x reader#toto wolff x you#toto wolff x y/n#daniel ricciardo#formula one x reader#formula one x you#formula one x y/n#formula one imagine#formula one fanfiction#charles leclerc#max verstappen#lewis hamilton#george russell
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Always the same sequence. Latinos/gangs come up with an antagonism, and when it looks like it has an effect, the religious zealots take over.
There's one team (shinra) with everybody on it.
I have to guess what the intention is, or the desired effect.
Coat stalker on terminal 2 (the room is FULL of gang presence) says "crackpot greybeard"; I'm not a color, I'm not a gang member, I'm certainly not a number. (To name something is to have power over it, an ancient belief; a Goucher girl said I was "like A. Dial" as opposed to C. Dial, or N. Dial; so the "a's" as I call them, are fast becoming everywhere)
Ashland library front epp-248 or whatever sits on terminal 9 says "she's the police", and based on her earlier antics and habits; I don't think so. Says "latin king flavor text" to a gang infested situation.
Stalker cars and yellow says gang flagging until it looks like it has an effect (like everything else), and then the religious zealots take over.
People standing in judgement of me, implore me to "pass on judgement" or not be judgemental; of the "do what you gotta do" sort, where it's unfortunate and not at all their fault that they have choices.
White is something Mexicans desperately want, and I can't figure out who sold people to who; coopers says "that's a white Mexicans can have" Poland stuff "that's a white Mexicans can have" and on the heels of "Americans like their latinas to look Italian" (they don't, they don't like latinas at all, baring them from cultural integration to present day)
Drug pussy for someone I was staying with on arnos says Mexicans can't get credit (cards), so this arrangement of identity stuff will continue until I somehow award experian credit ratings to Mexicans as a whole
A charger costing a lot for someone who sleeps outside is being software moderated to some end, and both the flavor text and the dprk green stalker woman from mountain park path (and the only person I encountered) all say "phil lee". But that's a matter of chaddock convenience; they kill for less.
Bottom line is, this all seems to be leading up to the kind of life I should have been leading since childhood. Which is regrettable.
Why chastity? People don't have choices and being dead is "the other thing".
Why mass shootings? Either American stresses are so great that people are melting down violently at a rate of more than two a day or so, OR, the government wants Americans to "volunteer" their weapons in order to make America safe again. (And it has to be one of those)
There's even a substation down on "Nevada street" not that that ever amounted to anything. After a mountain and a golf course and swimming pools etc served as less than the power plant they were looking for; to wit, I think this is cop city based on Reinhold and Oharas insurance down from "Ashland's finest" jewelry pawn shop on the plaza. Because Eric is el chapo and they're still looking for him. And he's still here. Call him ganon or browser or smithy or even booster in booster tower, but here he remains. Ashland's municipal power plant of eating it's own tail.
Grandpa Dunn's sense of humor has East Main where the freeway was supposed to be before his dad washed it out. How do I know? Instant death is held off by a tiny "yield sign" in an island marked with paint, all on what appears to be a straight road. Don't think of giving Ashland a second chance on the way out of town? You're going to get into a head on collision and die. And the Hamilton house is along the way, there.
East main "dead ends" as everything at the small minded (back then) plaza worried of a freeway around it. So a gas station sits next to the "left turn of doom" visible from esther's teen section window tables. You get out going "one way" but not wanting to go back down east main and the light is there so you (the tourist) get to think about how tempting it is to turn left at a red, in front of oncoming traffic which does not stop. And people do. That's the temptation. Was supposed to be a housing development there; down from was windmill inn along that whole hillside. There's even a remnant unpaved road that became a driveway around the hotel corner down to east main. Again, where the freeway was supposed to go. Look at it from the air and notice it would've been a straight shot from sixty six all the way to talent with no curves in it. Where the city was supposed to be above the freeway whereas all the commerical industrial was supposed to be below the freeway.
Notice also, that that refined bridge entering town, beckons without signs like it's supposed to have; because they thought those platforms were for fancy light posts not for interstate signage. Ask how the sign indicating where you're going is able to be seen soon enough for an out of town driver to act on. It doesn't seem like much, but you can't read it in passing. This is real. This is how it is.
A bone being thrown to the latinos that they can't actually have though they can't summary execute me because greed; 20k for a reward for a murder solved and they can't figure out how to get the money.
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vegas part 2: still december 1st. still at it. yes i know its late. i do not care. lets fucking go
and so. what we’ve all been waiting for. the race. self described as james hinchcliffe as having “cold temperatures, [a] dirty race track, low downforce configurations and walls everywhere.”
franco was cleared to race. though there was some controversy over it because there was an article that came out with a quote from franco about the crash where he claimed to have a concussion. however, i would like to point out that the article in question is translated from spanish and things Could have gotten Lost in Translation (also to my knowledge it wasn't a very reliable news source).
in any case. people were annoyed about the fact that franco Could have been racing with a concussion and yeah williams has been a little bonkers this year but driver safety is something that Should be taken seriously.
this wouldnt be the first time that a driver raced with a concussion either. in 2021 after silverstone max had a 50g crash with lewis and admitted much after the fact to having vision problems at the next race because of it. though that was not caught because he didn't tell anyone about it. so. to my understanding. the concussion protocols that are in place only really can do anything if the driver tells someone about it.
regardless he was there to race. as was george, who showed up in a pinstripe three piece suit
and so they lined up
russell
sainz
gasly
leclerc
verstappen
norris
tsunoda
piastri
hulkenberg
hamilton
ocon
magnussen
zhou
lawson
perez
alonso
albon
stroll
bottas
and colapinto started from the pitlane
“its very simple for max,” crofty reminded us as the lights started to go out. he just needs to finish above lando and in the points and basically “hes world champion again”
and charles (cause remember, he is max’s pawn according to lando) must have known this because on lap fucking one he managed to fully launch himself from fourth to second, somehow getting past both pierre and carlos.
meanwhile, liam lawson continued his tirade against old men by fighting now kevin magnussen. and nearly hit the wall doing so. “great man putting moves on him,” one of the announcers said. “we know how feisty he can be”
kevin though was not pleased with the move. “lawson was moving in a straight line when i was slipstreaming!” he said
and so you know. there were something insane like over 90 overtakes at last years vegas race. this year was expected to be about the same.
so after lap 1, heres what we were working with:
russell
leclerc
sainz
gasly
verstappen
norris
tsunoda
piastri
hulkenberg
hamilton
ocon
zhou
lawson
alonso
magnussen
perez
albon
stroll
bottas
colapinto
george took the fastest lap on lap 3. which was good cause charles was only .4 behind him. and then charles took the fastest lap from george.
this was because while the mercedes was faster in the corners, the ferraris were faster on the straights. the mclarens were fast no where. and max was pootling along with his diy wing, managing to pass pierre for 4th on lap 4.
meanwhile oscar got noted for a false start.
george and charles had been battling ferociously for first but charles had to pull back to save his tires. so george was now 1.8 seconds in the lead, and he might have a plastic bag stuck on his car.
charles pulled back so much that he got passed by his own teammate and was now down in third. he was not happy about that. he was actually told that carlos was going to try not to pass him, that was not the plan. but before he did (and i really think this radio was here? im not sure it might have been later) he told his team to “maybe try in spanish” telling carlos not to pass him.
then he got passed by max, which he really was not happy about.
this was what he got for damaging his tires. unfortunately it was too early to bring him in, so he had to stay out and suffer.
lewis meanwhile had figured out that his car was Not Shit for once and slammed his foot on the accelerator. he managed to get all the way up past oscar.
lando, still chasing his title dreams, passed pierre and was now fifth, though he was now back behind charles (max’s pawn) (max’s extremely angry pawn)
or at least he was until charles was called to pit on lap 10, as was lando
lewis passed yuki, he was now up to 7th
“as it stands, max verstappen will be champion at the end of the grand prix,” crofty told everyone, as max was currently sitting in third.
and it really wasn't looking good for mclaren as oscar got a 5 second penalty for a false start.
and with all the pit stoppage that was happening around him, lewis had managed to work his way up to fourth.
and then max and carlos both pitted and he ended up in second, right behind george on lap 12
max came out of the pits in 12th, but crucially he was in front of both ferraris and lando
lando saw this and stepped on the accelerator, putting in a fastest lap.
and george pitted, leaving lewis out in the lead. (george had been 15 seconds clear of lewis, so when he came back out he was in second)
“we’re in for a while heap of overtakes tonight,” crofty said excitedly as the race really started to take shape.
it was at this point that the shenanigans began ensuing. esteban was called in to pit, but absolutely no one was ready for him so he had to go back out and do a whole nother lap before coming back into the pits Again, which was bad news for his track position and also bad news for alpine cause that was a massive screw up.
and lance’s tires were also not ready when he came into the pits. at first this looked like an aston fuck up, but then after the race it was revealed that he had absolutely no radio for the entire race, so he was just kind of raw dogging it. as in, he had no one telling him at all when to come in to pit, so he made the calls himself. hence why he had no tires ready at all. so his pit was delayed.
and yuki drove over the speed limit sign at the end of the pit lane.
lewis was called to pit on lap 14, and he came out 9th, behind lando. lewis was not happy about this. “what the hell man?” he said over the radio. “how many places have i just lost?”
“we wouldve lost another five places if we hand hung it out any longer,” his engineer, bono, said.
fortunately though, lewis was in a fast car. and he had fought to the front from 10th already once this race, he could certainly do it again.
lap 15 saw pierre gasly screaming over his radio for more power
“low on power,” he said, normally.
“everything is looking okay to us,” came the pit wall response, entirely unbothered.
“WAIT I HAVE NO POWER!” pierre screamed.
and then his car started smoking.
fortunately he was close enough to the pits where he was able to pull in without triggering a safety car, but he was pissed.
“oh man,” he said forlornly over the radio as he pulled in.
and then the cameras panned to a giant hole in the side of his car.
which he later posted on his instagram story
“you gotta feel for gasly,” the announcers said. “qualified third and didn't finish the race.”
meanwhile, checo, who had somehow ended up second when no one was looking, let max though and now he was in second. then carlos passed checo.
and on lap 17 lewis passed lando, also taking the fastest lap.
and then charles passed checo, lewis passed checo, and lando passed checo, who was now way down in 7th.
“the mercedes is flying,” martin brundle said.
by lap 19 we had
russell
verstappen
sainz
leclerc
hamilton
norris
tsunoda
piastri
albon
alonso
hulkenberg
zhou
lawson
perez
ocon
stroll
colapinto
magnussen
and bottas
and no, your eyes do not decieve you! that is the williams of alex albon up into 9th! and the sauber of zhou guanyu in 12th! it was looking good for them!
and then ferrari began their return to their roots.
what roots are those? you might be asking.
well lets take a look
“let me know asap if its going to go to plan c cause that changes everything,” carlos said over the radio on lap 19
“let me get back to you,” came the response from the pit wall. which was a classic ferrari “we are checking” moment (as crofty happily pointed out)
“norris is 4 placed behind max,” martin said. “he needs to be in front to keep the championship alive.”
“that mclaren doesnt have the pace,” crofty said. and he was right. there was also some speculation that that could have something to do with the fact that they couldn't use their revoked rear wing with the special mini drs flap on it that had been declared illegal a few rounds ago.
they called to the mclaren pit wall to ask zak brown his thoughts. and he said that they don't really have the pace at all.
“you must be cheering for mercedes to take the big points away from ferrari,” martin said, because remember, ferrari are trying to take the constructors championship title from mclaren
zak agreed that they were cheering for mercedes, and even went as far as to say “go lewis go!”
but back to the race.
carlos was told that ferrari were targeting plan a on lap 22 (which was speculated to be a one stop), george was 10 seconds ahead of max and mclaren was still suffering.
“the front right looks like its about to go any lap” lando said. and oscar could not get close to yuki to pass him.
“man these guys are fast on the straight,” lewis said about ferrari. martin pointed out that he was only three races away from being one of “those guys” and wondered if he was cheering for that in his cockpit. because remember he had expressed interest to quit mercedes early after the shit show that had been the brazilian gp.
and, kind of insanely. toto had insinuated recently that he would have gotten rid of lewis even if lewis had not gone to ferrari because he had a “shelf life” that was coming to an end. but that comment seemed to have only motivated lewis more.
he was certainly doing better than alex albon, who apparently had an overheating problem now. “can we just have one race without problems?” he said angrily over the radio.
“ted!” crofty said excitedly over the radio. “its almost time for your favorite part of a modern f1 grand prix! when sergio perez gets close to liam lawson!”
and it indeed was. checo was in 12 and liam was in 13.
also in an exciting position was zhou guanyu, who was in 11th and only one spot behind alex albon. stake could get a point! their first point! and it was looking like an even better position to be in because alex albon’s engineer came over the radio on lap 26 to tell him:
“alex, weve got a terminal problem here, we need to retire the car.”
and so the bad luck continued for williams.
oscar pitted on lap 26.
carlos also wanted to pit on lap 26. “lets get off these tires,” he said over the radio, once again trying to be his own race engineer.
but he did not pit. max pitted.
“box me guys, box me,” carlos said again on lap 27.
“carlos is trying to continue [his method of making his] his ferrari tacticians to do what he wants but they’re not” crofty said.
meanwhile max’s pit stop was called off, perhaps it was to trick another team into pitting.
and still, carlos was not boxed. he was instead told to swap positions with charles, who had come up behind him. which was interesting because lewis was quite literally half a second behind charles. but they still swapped. and managed to keep lewis behind.
carlos started to come into the pit lane. but then he backed out. not before he had already crossed the white line though, which usually means an instant penalty.
lewis pitted. and max pitted. max also complained about carlos crossing the white line on the pit entry.
crofty reported that there had been a very late call to “stay out stay out” from ferrari, in true ferrari fashion.
“what happened?” carlos asked over the radio.
“we were not ready,” said his engineer.
“wake up you guys! c’mon!” carlos yelled back. he pitted on the next lap
“so where does this all shake out?” martin asked.
well. we had one mercedes that was doing very, very well (george) and another that was putting pressure on max (lewis)
george had apparently “even admitted he had an afternoon siesta” and he was leading by 15 seconds.
and on lap 30 we had
russell
leclerc
norris
verstappen
hamilton
sainz
hulkenberg
tsunoda
perez
zhou
ocon
lawson
piastri
alonso
magnussen
bottas
colapinto
stroll
and, if you were wondering, lando was only ahead of max cause max had pitted.
esteban and liam apparently boinked eachother on lap 31, with esteban coming on the radio to say that he got hit.
and lando pitted as lewis took another fastest lap.
“lewis hoans in on the back of max, his arch rival,” martin said pretty dramatically. “anyone still angry about that? 2021?” im sure that across the world many people said yes (2021 of course was the year that max won the championship on the last few laps after a bs safety car call and effectively robbed lewis of his 8th world title).
matin said that he asks that question to fans all the time and fans always say theyre still mad about it.
lewis then slammed the accelerator again and passed max on lap 32 for third, then got up to second as charles went into pit.
you might be wondering why carlos hadnt gotten a penalty yet for crossing the white line on the pit lane. well out trusty commentators were wondering too. “ill be very surprised if we don't hear anything,” martin said.
george pitted. it was a free pit stop because he had been 33 seconds ahead of lewis, so he still came out in first.
“theyve got this race in the bag as it stands,” crofty said about mercedes. “but its a street track and theres several bags flying around. danger around every corner.”
zhou meanwhile was barely holding onto 10th (and a point!) in front of esteban ocon
by lap 34 we had george still leading, followed by
hamilton
verstappen
sainz
leclerc
norris
hulkenberg
piastri
zhou
ocon
lawson
tsunoda
alonso
magnussen
perez
colapinto
bottas
stroll
“what a driver from lewis hamilton,” martin said. and it was. hed come up from 10th now twice.
“are we going to get a finish like spa?” crofty asked. then quickly amended that to be “as in lewis hunting down george” at the end, not george getting disqualified for being too light.
there were 15 laps to go. lewis put in another fastest lap. and his gap to george was 9.1 seconds.
and if rb could hold onto their current track position, they would be ahead of haas in the constructors championship, which was roughly 10 million dollars
lewis took fastest lap on lap 37. but then charles, who was also on a rampage, took it from him.
“give it 10 laps and he’ll be right on the gearbox of russell,” martin said.
and there was still nothing in terms of penalties for carlos.
“i don't know how ferrari have managed to argue this,” the announcers said. and karun even came on from race control to read the rulebook out loud, the exact section that said under which circumstances penalties should be given for crossing the white line of the pit box extry.
and then checo pulled a move of all moves. crofty even branded it as “vintage sergio perez” as he managed to go right smack between liam lason and kevin magnussen, into a corner, and not a single one of them ended up in the wall as he did his double overtake on lap 39
lewis took the fastest lap again. and again it was taken by charles.
max was under pressure from carlos (who was 1.2 behind) and had no grip.
“you want me to try and keep them behind or what?” max asked his engineer, gp. cause remember, all max has to do is finish in front of lando and he wins the championship, something that he was currently doing. and even if both ferraris passed him, he would still be in front of lando.
“i think you should, yeah,” gp said passively and very confidently for someone who has, if you remember, a diy’d rear wing.
meanwhile checo passed ocon for 11th and lewis was now 7 seconds behind george.
carlos passed max on lap 42. he was now in third.
martin wondered if carlos was going to try and keep max in his drs, like he did with lando in singapore 2023, to try and protect himself from charles, who was definitely faster than him.
crofty said that carlos’s bosses wouldnt be pleased about that, especially since ferrari are actively trying to win the constructors championship, but his bosses were only his bosses for a few more races.
charles was still trying to pass max on lap 45. he was still failing.
then a little graphic popped up. if carlos had pitted earlier, when he had wanted to, simulation said that he could have finished second. martin found this very hard to believe. i guess we will never know for sure.
finally charles managed to pass max on lap 47. he was 1.5 seconds behind carlos.
and max was right in front of lando.
lando though was a ways back and boxed for softs to get a fastest lap.
george was still leading. if he continued to lead and won, we would have 7 different multi race winners. which has never happened before.
and if max stayed where he was he would win th championship. in vegas. like nelson piquet and keke rosberg in the 80s, who both also won their championship sby finishing in 5th.
and george won.
and max came in fifth.
so you know what that means.
“FOUR TIME CHAMPION OF THE WORLD, MAX VERSTAPPEN!!!!”
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“his driving and his ability has manhandled him to the win,” crofty said about max. cause remember, max didn't have the fastest car this year, it was not a dominating season like the last two gave been for him, he won with a diy rear wing for fucks sake!
THREE TIME RACE WINNER GEORGE RUSSELL
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george won, lewis came second. followed by carlos, charles, max, lando, oscar, nico, yuki, checo, fernando, kevin, guanyu, franco, lance, liam, esteban and valtteri.
george t posed on top of his car, then was so excited he jumped directly on top of the marshal holding the scale.
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and then, because vegas is Quirky and Cool and Different, the drivers don't do the podium and the interviews right where they pull up at the end of the race. no they do on a different part of the track, by the fountains.
so. how do they get there?
why, in a rolls royce of course!
and so lewis, george and carlos all hopped in one, and max and gp hopped in the other.
gp was very, very proud of max
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max was more interested in exploring the rolls that they were in.
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over in the other rolls, george had somehow wound up in the middle seat despite being 6’3, lewis was fixing his appearance in the mirror, and carlos was wearing a beanie
but they finally made it around, to the fountain where they were met with jenson button, who was absolutely slutting it up in a brown velvet blazer with a black turtleneck
and oh? what is this? “oh! jenson’s found a friend!” crofty said.
and he had! jenson was joined by terry crews
and unfortunately this is the part of my notes that i took entirely in the dark. so bear with me here.
first, i was incredibly confused why terry was there, and then it became very obvious that he was just a massive fangirl trying to hold himself together, which was incredibly funny to watch.
still
george was incredibly happy with his race. “i cant even describe this [feeling?], dominant weekend.” and later he said he was waiting for something bad to happen, like a tree hitting the track, but it never happened. also later jenson called george’s race “perfect” he said he was cancelling his flight and going out drinking. which he did do. though he didn't have any other clothes with him so he had to go out in the pin stripe three piece suit that he showed up to the paddock
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lewis was next and he started by congratulating max (which he had also done in the pit lane with the red bull crew) and then said that he “had fun coming from the back…best the car has ever felt!” and then speculated that maybe that was because it was cold. he definitely proved toto’s shelf life comments wrong (and damon hill agreed ) and even apparently out performed mercedes simulations of the race.
(jenson later on comically slid over to try to talk to lewis like a dude in a romance movie. he and lewis were called "slagclaren" when they were both mclaren teammates there and theyre never beating the allegations)
and carlos said that he had been “hoping vegas had something to offer me after last year.” with the man hole. he said he had actually been looking for every manhole cover while he was racing so he could avoid them
and max. who they interviewed as a special treat because he had just become a 4x world champion. “its been a long season, but as a team we kept it together. to stand here as a four time world champion us something i never thought possible….this season taught me a lot of lessons that i am very proud of.”
with this championship win, max becomes the second person to win his first four titles consecutively (the first was sebastian vettel, who also did it with red bull), though max did break sebs record of fewest days between first and fourth win by one day exactly, and only the sixth driver to ever win four or more world titles, joining the ranks of sebastian vettel, alain prost, juan manuel fangio, michael schumacher, lewis hamilton (the last two also both also won 4 consecutively, but not their first)
and then he said that his fans got a bit spoiled last year with all the wins, and had to wait awhile this year.
the podium was fun and filled with champagne and george doing his comical little hop hop and lewis and george holding the trophy like it was their newborn child for some reason.
and then soaking eachother in champagne
toto wolff even had good things to say about george and lewis, saying that george’s driving was from “another planet” and praised lewis for being able to get to p2 from p10.
lewis also gave some advice to younger drivers during the press conference that was very heart felt. the question posed to him was: Does your advice to young drivers about not being weighed down by the adverse criticism probably come from your feeling that you have been adversely criticized this year?
“It's not about this year. We're talking about youngsters, we're talking about eighteen year olds. And I remember when I was twenty two and you're thrown in the deep-end, you've been given training as a young driver through the younger series but you're not, most of them, probably don't have a PR person. The team will have a PR person but they're not looking out for you, they're looking out for the team. So, you're thrown in the deep-end and you're trying to be nice and people take advantage of you. So, my guidance, like, if I had a young driver and I was looking after him, I would put a lot of support around him so that people couldn't get to him. You know, the socials and media and stuff would not be able to affect that young individual's mindset. And I think that protecting that is really important 'cause then, you know, I think it's really about firstly them getting the opportunity and not knocking 'em down when they make mistakes. Which one of you or anyone here at eighteen years old-nineteen years old has not made mistakes? And when you do it in the spotlight it's really, really tough. And so we should be lifting these people up and giving them not just one chance, two chances, just continue to support them and just not slating them 'cause that's, it's just not nice.”
he also gave some advice for the rookies next year:
“...that I don't know! Don't do absolutely everything everyone tells you to do. Ask lots of questions. Take your time. Don't let the negativity get to you because people are so negative nowadays, judging you non-stop. So, stay off social media and keep your family and your closest friends close to you 'cause they are the only ones that are your true friends and know they are gonna be there for you when the going gets tough.”
also the vibes of this press conference were kinda funny. lewis had changed and was slaying, george was back in his puff jacket but over his race suit and carlos was still in his beanie
and when asked why george was in his puff jacket again, he said that no, he had not jumped into the fountain, he was just cold from getting soaked in champagne. and last year at vegas he said that he got pneumonia and had pneumonia from november to february and was not keen on getting a repeat of that.
but pretty much everyone had good things to say about max verstappen. including lando, who if you will remember, dragged max through the mud at the beginning of the weekend and was vaguely battling him in the championship for p1. he went up to him in the media pen and congratulated max on his win right away
and max was thankful for this, but he also told lando : “I told you, many times, there will be a day. You’ll be world champion.”
lando then said “Let’s celebrate in Abu Dhabi.”
and max said “will do”
lando also called him a motherfucker in his congratuations comment on instagram
in his interviews, lando said that he was proud of how he has improved this season and has realized how much more pressure there is when you're driving to battle for the championship. he also said that he was trying to give himself grace for not winning. he also said that he would have changed the whole car this weekend, it was that bad. though he did say that it had pretty much nothing to do with the rear wing that they couldn't use anymore
other drivers also had good things to say about max.
like franco: "its incredible what he has achieved, all the championships and races he's won. he's an incredible driver, in my opinion currently the best one in f1. he also did it with a car that wasn't the fastest…hopefully at some point we'll be able to beat him!"
and charles: "You know that he's not going to let any hundreths go and that whatever he can do to maximize the car he will do, I think like every other drivers but he's really on it every laps & you cannot really relax. But I like this challenge we've raced each other since a long time and I liked it."
george: "Max has done an amazing job and you know when he didn't have the car, he always got the best results possible & the guys he was fighting didn't. That's what makes him the champion!"
and esteban: “this year he has been the strongest out there and its been nice to watch”
max himself though was definitely enjoying his fourth championship. he said during his interview that he was “very thirsty” and then progressively started to get drunk. while in the paddock still. he started with the beer and said it was beer (after an interviewer asked if he was drinking dutch chocolate milk)
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at one point he was even double fisting gin and tonics
and i cant find my link but! he also made red bull vodkas for i think the sky sports team? which was unhinged of him.
and also possibly explains several of his highly unhinged (but very welcome) comments. including but not limited to:
max bragging that he would have won the championship in other cars as well: "Would I have become champion in the McLaren? Yes! And much earlier too. In 2021 l would have also won the title in a different car [Mercedes]. In 2022 that would have been more difficult, because Ferrari was perhaps a bit too fragile then. And last year? Well, that would have been a bit more difficult."
max absolutely flaming the hell out of zak brown TO HIS FACE over the fact that zak said that max could only win in the fastest car: “Like you said, you know, before I can only win in the fastest car, this year has been a little bit different?”
and then several interviews and several drinks later he was asked if it was true that he had “run into zak brown and tell him you can become world champion not just in the fastest car?”
“yes! and i ABSOLUTELY told him that!” max said, while drinking gin and tonic “live on sky sports.”
the red bull team were being pretty much equally as silly
i managed to lose the link somehow but one of the mechanics commented on a post about max being a 4x wdc that he knew they “didn't need that rear wing.”
and also, they did manage to remember to pack the max 4x wdc merch, but not the right rear wing
he also got very sappy about his childhood and what he would tell his younger self:
"I wouldn't tell small Max anything because small Max was not worried about anything. Small Max was just loving life: driving quadbikes, go-karts, motocross bikes, having fun with his friends, not enjoying school. Honestly? That's the beautiful part of it. You shouldn't tell him anything and just let him live his life. I wish I could see myself with small Max. It was a good time."
he also got absolutely SOAKED with champagne
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and went and did an interview for a spanish news outlet saying that charles was going to be the next world champion.
oh. speaking of charles.
he was not having nearly as good a time as max was. or even george was.
he was actually getting nearly possessed by american psycho.
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and in case you cant hear him , this boils down to basically this:
bryan (race engineer) : "pick up please"
charles: "yes whatever you want. as always."
bryan: "you did your job"
charles: "yeah, yeah, I did my job, but being nice fucks me over all the fucking time, all the fucking time. it's not even being nice, it's just being respectful."
fred (team principal): "Charles. CHARLES." charles: "i know I need to shut up, but at one point it's always the same. oh my fucking god"
bryan: "ok but anyway you did the right thing for the team"
bryan: "and pick up please" charles "yeah yeah fucking pick up what the fuck you want"
charles: "the radio is on. sorry"
(and team red line, max’s e racing team, really tried their damndest to get charles his community service date with max for this with one of their members tweeting “community service coming for you after that teamradio”)
but what did happen here?
well. this is not the first season that charles has done what ferrari tells him to do and then still manages to get screwed over. so this seemed to come from a place of frustration at the team more than anything else. he did have some other radios during the race that were angry, including “FUCKING STUPID” which i think was when carlos crossed the pit lane entry (which ne never did get a penalty for) and saying “NICE. AMAZING.” after being told they would swap cars (so charles would be ahead.)
he said in his post race interview that “But it's just frustrating when it's like this and it's been frustrating for me, but i can understand that nobody understands that.”
he also though said that "I am not happy about Carlos, but I won't go into details. Why? Because we talk about these things before the race, and I'm always the only one who respects those agreements. From now on I will be thinking about myself only. It's a shame that i couldn't get more points on lando."
carlos also had some, albeit not as intense things to say about it.
first he spoke about the pit stop fuck up, saying that
“I don't want to look for who's at fault. It's not the moment to talk or analyze. We need to look [at what happened.] I was already asking to pit 2 laps earlier because I knew Charles was faster and I wanted to let him by, but I wanted to get out of the way. Hamilton was coming behind him and I knew chaos was coming there. I asked to be pitted because there was a lot of graining and we couldn't do anything there. We didn't pit and I stayed out for 2 laps. Even on the lap where I wanted to pit, we made a mess at the pit entry and things didn't go well, but they didn't go well for me, they didn't go well for Charles. I also lost a lot of race time there. It wasn't a nice situation and it wasn't easy to manage. It went like this and that's why I prefer to analyze later and not speak in front of a mic.”
he did acknowledge that charles probably wasn't happy with him during the press conference, saying that "i guess he [charles] isn't happy but i'm also not happy with the way things were handled at the time,i think no one's happy today the in the team because we all expected a bit more [...]."
but he also repeated that “I agreed not to talk to the media because we always talk here, we always make a mess. I agreed with him not to say anything to the media.” and “It's stuff between me and him. I never open the radio, I never talk to the media because I don't like it. It's not a nice thing to do. It's not necessary.”
and planet f1 released a whole article that effectively backed carlos up.
still, charles was effectively still in time out because this was the statement that got released. usually these are with the drivers and done over video. charles just released a written statement:
“I finished the race where I started it today, so it wasn't that exciting, but if you look at the details it was quite an eventful one. Unfortunately, we degraded the fronts on the first stint on Mediums, then we were able to come back on the Hards which were working better. Big congratulations to Max (Verstappen). He deserves this championship title, he has had an [amazing season and always maximised his results which has paid off for him. It gives us motivation to be even stronger next year and hopefully we can put him under some more pressure then. We will push hard in the last two races to try to finish the season ahead of McLaren”
he also posted an instagram post that tagged max (but did not follow him back cause remember that whole stupid thing?) and in this poto fump there was not a single photo of carlos, but there was one with lewis which was relieving, save the caption:
“First of all, a huge congrats to @maxverstappen for his 4th title, fully deserved. Now only 2 races to go, got to maximise everything on my side to try and take that P2 in the drivers championship and the constructors title. Let's goooo”
he also posted a picture of lewis and tagged him in it.
but during the interviews in vegas, he was so caught up in the ferrari team drama that he forgot max won the championship.
"It was a track where we had to be pretty fast, the Mercedes were untouchable, we got the best possible result. Verstappen champion? Oh yes that's right &, I forgot, well done to him, he had an exceptional season, he deserves it."
though maybe that was all the weed that was still in the paddock.
charles wasn't the only one pissed over his radio. for example kevin saying “that's not a good thing. that's not a good thing” when his engineer praised him for doing a one stop.
and also zhou said “See you fucking later, Colapinto” as he passed him.
someone who was not angry though was one nico rosberg, who did not commentate this weekend but he was there, networking for one of his many side projects, finally not wearing beige, and busting out his only dance move in a club, the elbows
so the drivers championship is squared away. constructors is next. we will see how this one shakes out in qatar. only two more to go. see you then.
the 2024 formula 1 silly season and drama master post, part 2 (part 1 here)
Hello and welcome to ah fucking fuck auto caps fuck fuck fuck how do i turn off auto caps AHA there we go okay. take 2
hello and welcome to the great and very insane formula 1 2024 season drama post, part 2. if you are new here or are just looking for part one (which contains the previous 16 (?) races, the off season, pre season testing and everything else, that can be found HERE. (a word to the wise: open it in a browser, not the app, and preferably on a computer to avoid crashing. its fucking long).
what the hell is formula 1? car go fast. fastest cars in the world zoom around tracks at top speeds of over 300kph, piloted by the top 20 drivers in the world. it might not sound dramatic, but oh man. you will Not be disappointed. this post focuses on the drama, the insanity, the sheer what the hell how is this a serious sport. no legitimately. we've just about seen it all this year. grindr, dogs, watersports, ice cream brands, its all here.
the point of this post? to educate, to catalog the insane drama, and to just have a good time. people like to gatekeep this sport, there is also a lot happening. i try to make it easy to understand. again, probably best to start at the beginning of the post because it does a pretty good job of explaining things, which i began way back in january, and can be found HERE (again, shes long, be careful)
and, as usual, if you do not want to see this post EVER AGAIN, block the tag #saph explains silly season 2024
and a second caution, i assume this post will be getting long as well. including this one we have minimum 9 updates left!
anyway, those of you who have been following along the whole time, welcome back! i know we got a little delayed. and i know we’re on a new post, so lets just briefly take a second for me to explain what the fuck happened. first i had an anatomy test, second i work 2 jobs with fuck ass hours, third tumblr decided to stop letting me look at any of my drafts, fourth tumblr support ghosted me about the drafts issue and the post was half saving half not so i just decided fuck it, were going with post 2, electric boogaloo, and fifth, i decided to start typing this instead in a google docs so. many changes. if you're new here i am usually more on top of this.
but here we are. were back on street circuits. we’re in baku, azerbaijan, for the start of the last third of the season. 8 races remain, world championship titles are still within grasp of multiple people. the drama is dramaing. and today is september 22, 2024 and lets fucking go.
first and foremost, on account of the fact that this post is late (again, see above), were going to have to do a bit of a speed run. if you're new here, i promise that this is not representative of my normal dedication to the update post. and for those asking, yeah, ill probably compile it somewhere better than a tumblr post after its all said and done, but we don't have time for that now.
what we do have time for is the Off Week (and like some of the media stuff). and it was filled with silliness:
george russell decided to wear what can only be described as slightly ugly yellow short shorts with his taylor swift shirt that he got at the eras tour. this was baffling for several reasons, the main reason being that i don't think the internet knew that he was capable of wearing a graphic t shirt
fernando alonso got his aston martin valkyrie finally. in case you are unfamiliar, a valkyrie i think is the worlds fastest street legal car. he posted tweets about this that made it seem like he wanted to fuck the car. hilariously, the car broke down an hour later.
we also had the very thrilling conclusion to grill the grid. oscar won and he somehow managed to look more pleased about his grill the grid win than his first race victory.
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nico rosberg went to the green awards and he wore a fantastically insane teal blue suit. yes i know hes not a current driver. but you all like hearing about him so ask and you shall receive. unfornunately i cant find a picture of it though
and also not a current driver is mick schumacher, but my roommate asked me to include that he was seen on his girlfriends instagram being bad at golf. like. exceptionally bad at golf. like he hit a tree 20 feet in front of him.
also playing golf was lando norris. except he managed to look like try bolton from high school musical 2.
he also talked about the world driver championship with his friend max fewtrell while they were playing golf. unfortunately i lost this link in the sea of technical difficulties, but the gist of it was that he was saying that there is still hope for him to beat max in the championship (hes about 60 points behind right now). lando doesnt usually talk about the championship because he doesnt want news outlets to paint him as “desperate” so this was interesting
charles leclerc had an insane off week. first he rear ended someone in monaco. then he spoke at a yacht conference. he was not scheduled to speak at said yacht conference, he was there doing something else and they were like hey you're cool people know you, heres a microphone. he alsp ended up on a weather channel while promoting a karting event he was doing for the jules bianchi foundation (his god father, the one who died during the f1 race in japan 2014). he also changed his instagram pop and re centered it because some random tiktoker told him it matched his aesthetic better.
oscar piastri posted a photo of himself sitting in the cockpit of a plane and then promptly deleted it. because he posted it on 9/11. for anyone who doesnt know what that is, that was when some terrorists hijacked commercial planes and few them into the world trade centers in nyc and the pentagon in washington dc
max verstappen also posted a plane pic with himself and lando norris, but he did not delete it.
we also had the return of daniel ricciardo’s jpg instagram account, which is kinda like a finsta for photos that hes taken. i think lando started this a few years ago.
heading into the race week we certainly got a weird ass batch of pr. including but not limited to:
lewis hamilton was back on top and slaying in the fit game. as was yuki.
lewis hamilton also exposed george russell as listening to katy perry pre race. katy perry and taylor swift (this was after he claimed that he liked listening to old school rap music.) though, lewis then started singing wrecking ball???? confusing vibes all around
george was not off the hook yet tho because some intern definitely make him say skidibidi toilet or whatever the thing is idk, i might be gen z but im not insufferable, okay? actually george in baku was just all kinds of unhinged
george and alex also got up to something, what it is no one knows but it is clearly something
max pulled up to the paddock de aged about 10 years. picture one is of him in baku in 2015 (i believe he was 17) and picture 2 is this year. no i am not kidding.
and franco walked into the paddock telling everyone about argentinian mate (which is a drink, not a friend)
and max shoved a microphone out of the way so everyone could gossip
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then of course, we had some slightly more relevant drama
haas announced that ollie would be replacing kevin at baku. in case you forgot, kevin magnussen received a total of 12 penalty points over the season so far, which means he gets one race ban. how did he get the points? well he was mostly wreaking havoc on everyone else so that his teammate, nico hulkenberg, could drag his car into the points. lets all remember the time in saudi arabia where he managed to get 20 seconds of penalties by basically driving like a mad man just to make sure that nico could keep his position after he pit stopped. anyway, nico was kind of pissed about the race ban situation and said “maybe the guidelines for F1 penalties need to be reviewed as the stewards ‘want to get involved’ no matter the contact.”
in any case though, k mags was out. and ollie was in. we’ve seen ollie before. notably he subbed in for carlos sainz at the saudi arabia gp when carlos had appendicitis. he managed to get points as well. since then, he has been announced as a haas driver for 2025 and is now subbing in for k mags (haas, later in the week called him a super sub. clearly no gen z person read that over.) he can do this because ferrari has a haas engine so they share reserve drivers.
adrian newey finally got employed. i know! i can hardly believe it either! but he did! and youll never guess where!
ferrari? no that would be too obvious.
mercedes? nah
williams? no too much of a shit show
aston martin? ding ding ding! just the right amount of shit show!
that is right. newey is going to aston for 2025.
apparently he was offered a “good package” according to himself, which i assume means pay and also the fact that lawrence stroll made him a shareholder? stakeholder? whatever its called. in the team itself. basically he has a lot of power.
he said that he always wanted to work with fernando and lewis. and he couldn't do both. and aston had a better package than ferrari.
fernando looked positively evil during all the announcement pictures. and called the team "definitely the team of the future" and for those of you who don't know, fernando is positively evil. hes just been stuck in a shit box and we havent seen very much of him, but man does he know how to evilly slut it up. so that will be fun to see.
by contrast, people said that lance was not excited enough. and well. lance 1. has resting bitch face and 2. never really looks excited about anything. also he lives in a world where take your child to work day somehow became his job. (his dad owns the team).
lewis hamilton was asked what he thought about adrian not going to ferrari, and here's what he had to say:
"i feel like, while I have mentioned before that it would be an honor to work with adrian, i have been privileged to work with two championship winning teams that didnt have adrian."
mclaren announced pato o ward would do FP1 in mexico. who is pato o ward? hes one of mclaren’s indycar drivers and one of the f1 reserve drivers. he is incredibly charming and definitely runs his own social media as seen here:
mclaren Also claim they figured out who their number 2 driver is and they claim its oscar. i say they claim because the statements were a lot more complex than that. essentially, according to andrea stella, the priority is to the team first, then lando and then oscar. so they didn't outright say that oscar is the number 2 driver and i am willing to bet real money that this is because mr mark webber, oscars manager, has something in oscars contract that prevents him from being a number 2 driver. this is of course because mark webber was one of the most infamous number 2 drivers in f1 history to none other than menace war criminal sebastian vettel, who in their time as teammates, managed to win 4 back to back world champions. or, top to bottom if you're mrs darbus from high school musical.
lando was asked about this and he said that yes, the team does support him. though he would not expect oscar to give up a win for him and that it is more complex behind the scenes. i suppose we will see if there are any papaya rules coming out this weekend….
and oscar said "i think the main point is its not purely just going to be me pulling over for lando every single race, because thats how none of us, including lando, wont want to go racing, if we feel that someone has done a much better job on a weekend, whichever way it is, we want that person to be rewarded."
max verstappen commented on the mclaren situation as well. which was funny mostly because red bull has one of the most defined number 1 and number 2 drivers of any team. he said "you look at it form oscar's perspective, he is closer to lando than lando to me. they have to deal with that."
and allow me to put on a tin foil hat as we are about to talk about the future of the red bull seat. because all i have to offer here is a baseball hat and a red bull can.
a long time ago we talked about the red bull cans. the ones that red bull makes to promote f1. at the end of last season red bull put max and checo on the red bull can. this season at the start it was just max on the red bull can. well. now checo has reappeared on the cans too. and i will tell you what i think this means. it means that checo is not getting swapped this season, which was a possibility for awhile.
but! there is more!
daniel ricciardo made an instagram post this week. and it was very interesting. but most interestingly he was wearing a red bull hat.
which he does occasionally, no big deal really. he did race for the for several years, he technically does currently. BUT then he showed up TO THE PADDOCK wearing the red bull hat.
which is Big Interesting. usually you show up in a statement outfit or wearing the team kit. and daniel is not a red bull racing driver. he is a visa cashapp racing bulls driver. they might be owned by red bull but they are Not the same team. so why the red bull hat. in the paddock. well, the rumor is that hes taking checos seat for 2025. and the rumor is that this will be announced before mexico. so checo can have a proper send off.
and with that. the baku lore.
theres a lot that has happened at baku. as i said its a street circuit. and i think its the fastest street circuit. but over the years theres been some notable events.
such as the great kimi raikkonen radio for gloves and steering wheel:
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they gave mini kimi this week gloves and steering wheel in honor of that
the max and daniel crash in 2018 when they were running p1 and p2 respectfully
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and of course. how could we forget. charles’s infamous “i am stupid” radio.
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speaking of charles, he crashed again in fp1. not quite in the same spot, but nearly. he took a picture with the marshalls.
then in fp2 he rage quit, basically saying that the car sucks.
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but he was back and better than ever in practice three because he managed to top the time charts. welcome back fuck ass ferrari.
some other teams definitely experienced the lows but not really the highs of baku during practice. like lance stroll who came on the radio to say “this is not a car” (good thing they have adrian newey now, right?
franco colapinto also cut his ear before practice on the neck strengthener stretcher thing that they all use and the team wanted to give him stitches but he was like no no no i need to be in the car in about 5 minutes im not doing that. so he jammed on his helmet and jumped in the car. he also crashed and when he went to the medical center he took off his helmet and there was blood everywhere and they were like no no no you cannot race! and he was like no! this is not from the crash! and then explained it and they let him do qualifying.
also im pretty sure? ollie bearman crashed? in practice? but frankly i don't have time to google it so whos to say.
but alas. qualifying.
i know i know this is kind of a shitty update. i promise ill go all out in singapore. i PROMISE.
so as i said. its a street circuit. high speed. 90 degree corners. and also windy as hell. we also had the dynamic duo of karun and harry in the commentary box.
max led the first practice, george led the second and i think charles led the third. or some order like that.
slipstream here is almost essential (slipstream: going behind another car to reduce the wind drag so you can go faster)
charles has the last three pole positions (first in qualifying) here in baku, but he has never won. by comparison, red bull have never had pole here but they have won.
and franco has never been to baku before.
i think that's all the exposition that we need here.
q1 started with max complaining about his car. “the car is jumping around like crazy on the rear axle” he said. despite this he was sitting in p3.
the mid field battle though….the mid field battle was heating the hell up. mostly because none other than franco colapinto, who if you will remember, has never been to baku before, had split the two ferraris. he was in third for the moment, .109 seconds behind carlos sainz and .159 seconds ahead of charles leclerc. we still had a lot of qualifying left to go, so this was probably not going to stay, but it was still insane. he was pushing insanely hard, nearly kissing the walls. clearly he had learned from his crash in practice.
the two mclarens waited until the very end of q1 to do their final flying push lap, and oscar made it through, but tragedy struck for lando.
lando was in the middle of his last flying lap, time was ticking down, and there was a Very Brief yellow flag on the track. now, according to rules, you cannot complete your flying lap if there is a yellow flag. so lando pitted and was stuck down in 17th and out of qualifying. this would be the first time that he was out in q1 since vegas last year (which if i remember correctly was also not his fault)
now though, of course nothing is ever that cut and dry. people thought that there had been a mis showing of a flag. yellow flag means that a car is stopped on track, white flag means that a car is going slowly on the track. and people thought that there had been a yellow flag shown when it was actually supposed to be a white flag (if there had been a white flag then lando would have been able to keep doing his flying lap) lando himself said that he had no idea what people were talking about because there is a light on the steering wheel that lights up when flags are called and he had a big yellow light. so it was clearly a yellow flag.
if you're concerned about lando being able to pull it out of the bag, id like to point you in the direction of the mexican gp last year where lando qualified 17th and finished 5th. on a track that was hard to overtake on. he can be absolutely insane when he wants to be. worry not gentle reader.
in any case. also out in q1 was daniel ricciardo, valtteri bottas, zhou guanyu and esteban ocon.
and notably, williams, who was on fucking fire this weekend as we already saw, finished q1 with alex albon in second (ahead of oscar) and franco colapinto in 8th. pierre gasly had somehow managed to also get into 4th. and nico hulkenberg was in 7th with ollie bearman in 13th. i told you the mid field battle was heating the hell up.
q2. everyone zoomed straight out of the gate. they didn't want to get lando norris’d. but, speaking of that, if lando managed to get no points in the race and charles managed to win, charles would overtake lando in the drivers championship. mark webber himself told this to charles, who was absolutely baffled.
in any case, charles was kinda suffering right now and that was because he was not getting slipstream from carlos to make his lap faster. meanwhile, carlos seemed to be actively trying to give charles the slipstream because he came on radio to say “he keeps missing the tow”
and amazingly, franco colapinto was 4 tenths AHEAD of alex albon. alex albon who had not been unqualified by his teammate once since the start of 2023. ex red bull driver alex albon. that alex albon.
max topped the times in q2, followed immediately by charles. insanely, fernando alonso managed to drag the aston martin to fifth. and franco was right behind him in 6th. by comparison alex albon was in 10th.
and from q2 we lost ollie bearman, yuki tsunoda (who has never qualified lower than 8th in baku), pierre gasly, nico hulkenberg and lance stroll. so yes, ollie bearman managed to outqualify nico hulkenberg. this is ollies second ever f1 race.
steaming on forward to q3.
we had, for review, in q3 the following:
both ferraris, both red bulls, both mercedes, both WILLIAMS (has not happened since vegas 2023), plus fernando alonso and oscar piastri.
right out the gate it was wild.
“red bull! theyve re found their mojo! or have they!” karun said. red bull were in 5th and 6th and not entirely sucking for the moment.
everyone did one flyer and then came out at the end for a second flyer.
here were the standings:
charles, carlos, oscar, george, checo, max, lewis, alex, franco, fernando
and everyone was making it to the line and all was going smooth until-
wait a second what is that
could it be! alex albon! with the air box fan still on his car! surely not!!!
oh but it was! and harry and karun were like oh wow so unfortunate for williams tisk tisk
meanwhile ted jumped on the radio to Loudly announce to everyone that this was insane and if i have time here i will put the rant he ranted cause it was Fantastic.
and what do you know i have time
so we had 3 minutes left qualifying and everyone was pulling out of the pits for their last flyer when oscar hopped on the radio to say
"the williams still has the air box fan in"
"oh what an error! disaster for williams!" karun and harry said. they speculated if the marshalls could get it or if the session needed to be red flagged. but alex threw the fan off the car.
and then they asked "ted have you ever seen that before?" and ted did not hold back:
"ITS A MASSIVE YELLOW FAN HOW COULD YOU MISS IT???!!! HOW COULD THE MECHANICS MISS IT???? I CANT BELIVE THEY WOULD MAKE SUCH A MISTAKE DOWN AT WILLIAMS! SUCH AN EXPERIENCED BUNCH OF GUYS AND GIRLS! WHAT IS GOING ON AT WILLIAMS OPERATIONALLY? HOW COULD YOU SEND A CAR OUT LIKE THAT?"
alex, obviously, got fined for an unsafe release 5k euros. he also had to throw the fan off to the side and got slightly covered in dry ice. he did not get to the a second flying lap.
franco did tho!
and here were out qualifying results:
p1: charles p2: oscar p3: carlos p4: checo p5: george p6: max p7: lewis p8: fernando p9: franco p10: alex p11: ollie p12: yuki p13: pierre p14: nico p15: lance p16: daniel p17: lando p18: valtteri p19: zhou p20: esteban
oh ho ho but we werent done yet. because pierre gasly got disqualified from qualifying. for failing fuel flow regulations. and lewis was going to have to start from the pit lane for changing his power unit.
everyone, and by everyone i mean oscar max and checo, pretty much said that charles was going to get pole no matter what, they knew this coming in and the best they were trying for was second
onto the race.
notably, this is considered a checo track. this was one of the three races that max did not win last year. because checo won it. its a track that he does well on, evidenced by the fact that he qualified above max in qualifying. so people were expecting big things from him.
and so, we head into lap 1.
charles managed to hang onto the lead. checo passed carlos straight out of the gate for third and max managed to pass george to take fifth. lando had managed to get ahead of nico and up into 13th. notably, franco held onto 8th and ollie was able to hold onto tenth.
someone who was not doing well was lance stroll, who came on the radio saying that he had a puncture. this was from contact with yuki. lance had to pit for fresh tires and was pretty immediately thrown to the back of the grid.
by lap 2 lando had managed to get past daniel and was in 12th, he was trying to get past yuki next, which he managed by lap 3. yuki also lost a spot to nico.
also slaying in the mclaren was oscar, who took fastest lap. then charles took fastest lap.
and lewis hamilton, who had started from the pit lane, was up to 16th. already. somehow. though he was displeased with the tires, sayig that “this tire is pretty bad” over the radio.
yuki meanwhile was clearly having a problem because he had started going very very slowly. thought the pit wall said that he had no problems. this would later turn out to be false but we will indulge them for the time being.
franco was STILL ahead of alex albon on lap 6. STILL.
lando on lap 8 managed to push his way into points positions, overtaking ollie bearman for 10th. though this was where things were about to slow down for him because in front of him were alex, franco and fernando, who were all very close together and would be hard to get past.
george was back in bad luck hell as a plastic bag entered his airbox. will he ever catch a break.
on lap 11 nico hulkenberg finally caught up with ollie bearman and passed him for 11th.
and max’s car was not working. to potentially no one’s surprise. “i have zero bite in the car” he said. and this was probably true because checo was a whole 6.5 seconds ahead of him. insane gap.
several pit stops later that i will not detail out because we simply do not have the time, alex albon ended up in 4th and lando ended up in fifth. and oscar was about to get undercut by checo.
“mojo seems to be back for checo perez” harry said, correctly.
mojo was back for him indeed. and now he was right behind lando.
and if you will recall, according to mclaren themselves, priority at mclaren is the team first, then oscar, then lando. but oscar was ahead of lando. so what did mclaren do?
they asked lando do hold up perez, but not compromise his own race.
remever a long time ago when i said mclaren wouldn't have any internal drama this season? man how i was wrong.
lando managed to hold up perez for around a lap or two before he got past. this was crucial because this was during when oscar was in the pits.
thanks to lando and the power of the papaya rules teamwork, oscar ended up coming out in 4th, only .706s ahead of checo.
mclaren are working together everyone! mclaren are working together!
meanwhile, turns out that yuki did indeed have problems because he retired on lap 17 with a hole in his sidepod from the contact with lance on lap 1. this was now two races in a row where he had had to retire for reasons out of his control.
several more people pitted. and eventually charles was back out in front, oscar was in p2. until he wasn't. no, he didn't dnf. he overtook charles! he was in p1! he popped out of nowhere! nowhere being 2 car lengths back and just flooring it to spring around charles like a little silly slinky! karun called it a “good, fair and robust defense,” which sounds like its descibing notes in wine. but this was not wine. this was the baku gp. and we were only half done.
ollie bearman was defending against lewis hamilton, holding on tightly to 14th place.
charles was still behind oscar and he could not get past, despite the fact that he was still very much in spitting distance. “they are pushing like crazy or they have more grip than us” he said.
carlos got past both lando and alex albon and was up into 4th
this brought max up behind lando. max was on 11 lap old tires and lando was on 24 lap old tires. but lando still defended like hell and managed to hold onto sixth. max was 0.632 seconds behind lando on lap 25 when he said that “my brakes are not working.” this was hardly a surprise. max has hated the car since china.
also experiencing technical difficulties was sir lewis hamilton. he was stuck down in 14th and was first told to do “everything you can do to get the surface temp down” of the tires. he said “im trying” then several laps later on lap 29 he came on the radio to say “are you seeing how i have to drive this thing?” “yes,” bono, his engineer said. “quite effective though.”
max was still half a second behind lando. mclaren faked a pit stop call over the radio to get max to pit. he did not.
but, george russell did manage to pass him. which was “not good for max’s world champion aspirations.”
this was also when ted very bafflingly said that “if i had a sofa in the pit lane i would be jumping up and down on it” im not sure what that was in response to.
meanwhile, ollie was still holding off sir lewis hamilton. and charles was trying to get oscar to pit again by lying over the radio. it was not working.
lando did a pit stop finally and came out a whole 15 second behind max. he was hoping to catch max by the end of the race. but it might be tight. lets go last lap lando.
“lando, imagine andrea on your shoulder saying ‘zero wheel spin’ in every exit,” lando’s race engineer said. if you're confused, everyone else was too.
10 laps to go and here were the order of affairs:
oscar
+.449s charles +1.865s checo +2.989s carlos +16.530s george +1.909s max +11.535s lando +9.715s fernando +2.589s alex +2.451s nico +4.667s franco +1.590s lewis +1.261s ollie +1.791s pierre +9.205s daniel +23.919s esteban +.789s lance +3.862s valtteri +3.631s guanyu
lando was determined. he took fastest lap on lap 43 and was 8.8s behind max
at this point, the leaders were starting to lap the cars in the back. “the back markers are starting to come up,” checo’s engineer said to him. “its going to get messy.”
“hold onto your hats and if you don't have one go get one and hold onto it” harry said. harry would turn out to be correct.
we had the top 3 all running very close to eachother, that was oscar, charles and checo and “welcome to the party carlos sainz!” who was now 1.2 seconds behind checo in the four way battle for the lead.
definitely not leading was lance stroll, who retired on lap 47 with a brake problem.
oscar managed to pull ahead of charles by 1.5 seconds, finally knocking him out of DRS range. so now it was a three way battle for second. and charles had “no rear tires. no rear tires at all.”
and, just like i said he would, lando managed to pass max on lap 49. he was closing the gap slowly in the championship.
“verstappen’s day goes from bad to worse,” harry said. because lando still had fastest lap, so he would score 3 more points than max. which is important if lando wants to beat max in the championship (though i think hes still like 60 points behind)
meanwhile! franco managed to pass nico hulkenberg for 10th! he was in the points!!!! at his second race!!!
but this was short lived because there was a crash! a big smackeroo! between carlos and checo!! checo was mad, carlos didn't know what happened.
what happened was that carlos was trying to pass checo but checo did not move over. it was deemed an equal fault accident. both of them were utterly confused at what happened and apparently spent 20 minutes in the medical center being utterly lost and aparently saying that sometimes this sport sucks. and! contrary to what several people said! checo did not bang on carlos’s helmet after the crash.
the crash actually caused chef's dad to have a heart attack. he is stable now.
and well. this clip of george from the post qualifying interviews definitely didnt age well:
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but! since we were a matter of a few laps from the end, this meant that the rest of the race was finished under a virtual safety car.
which meant
OSCAR PIASTRI WINS THE AZERBAIJAN GP
and george inherited p3!
and on his own merit too! no safety cars, no team orders, no weird shit!
“yes!” he whispered over the radio.
he almost fell getting out of the car, then gave us all the “one moment” hand gesture before properly celebrating.
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he also got driver of the day!
(this was marginally better than george russell, who said over the radio “i cant get any rubber (to pick up on his tires) all im getting is leaves”)
gunther steiner also hosted the post race interviews. which was interesting.
george said that the most difficult part of the race was “driving full gas into a wall of carbon fiber on the penultimate lap…the vsc should have come out sooner”
charles bashed ferrari because they didn't do any high fuel runs in practice.
oscar was entirely pleased. “i managed to overtake and hold onto it for the next 35 laps..one of the better races of my career.” and honestly, oscar winning a race straight after mclaren basically announcing that he was their number 2 driver is nothing short of hilarious.
and! mclaren was now leading the constructors championship by 20 points! for the first time in ten years!!!!
the top three had a moment outside of the car that was filled with baffled:
and oscar's engineer tom got to stand on the podium with him. he usually takes a selfie with oscar after each race he podiums at, but he was too excited to so george took this picture for them
(george also aparently demomished oscar in a game of uno on the plane, immediately humbling him)
george also shielded himself from the champagne on the podium
the cooldown room reacted to the crash in a very straight forward manner:
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and very quickly cause its midnight and the singapore gp starts in 8 hours, the post race, speed ran:
-mark webber told off laura winter for thinking that oscar didn't have good tire management
-alex albon was “super happy, that's a lot of points for us” (williams finished in 7th and 8th). he cut his own interview short when ollie bearman arrived, saying “I can go, im happy to go” and then waving comically.
-williams was so pleased with this result they blasted everyone with champagne. and they overtook alpine in the constructors championship! this was also their best race finish all season
-(and a quick note, if youre going to really blame logan for being that shit of a driver here, please remember that the car he was driving was several rounds of upgrades behind alex's pretty much the entire time he was driving it)
-ollie became the first driver to ever score points in his first two races for two different constructors because the double dnf pushed him up to 10th place. he said that there was not much difference between the haas and the ferrari, the ferrari was just red
-franco continued to charm everyone and flirt with the reporters.
-they interviewed george and lewis and the camera had to be adjusted for george's height. it was comical and resulted in my favorite edit so far of the season (sound on)
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-lando looked pleased and happy for once. he said about holding off checo that “i didn't hold him up i just had to cool my tires a little.” he was delighted to be leading the constructors for the first time in ten years and he defended alex albon saying “i struggled to get past alex for a while, which is common, alex doesnt make mistakes.” he also ratted on max for going to fast during the VSC and said “i didn't complain, facts were stated.” and to sum it all up he said that “im executing things well, i’m very quick…i’m not going to be the happiest guy, but i am never the happiest guy….car is performing well everywhere…some red cars behind us seem to be our biggest competitors right now”
-by comparison george insulted all of pirelli. the tire people. “pretty infuriating that it (the pace) changes this so much….its black magic, people who make the tires don't understand the tires…..for 20 laps we had a car not worthy of points and for 20 laps we had a car fighting for victory and the only difference is the tires.”
-lewis was notably upset after the race and walked through the paddock with his helmet on, not wanting to talk to anyone. but he did talk to franco and ollie and congratulate them on a job well done defending against him and racing against him. franco even fangirled over this on his instagram.
-charles was clearly upset with ferrari. he was so upset he posted a thirst trap.
-and oscar. oscar was very happy this afternoon. and his mom was there! she doesnt usually come cause it scares her, but nicole was there today!
-mclaren celebrated with a hell of a lot of champagne. both oscar’s wina and lando’s insane recovery, and the fact that they were leading the championship. red bull have been dethroned, at least for now.
-there was so much champagne that lando took off his socks to spray it. all seems well at mclaren.
-at least one thing is for sure, oscar had a better time here this weekend than last year when he got food poisoning and only ate four pieces of toast
and with that. we head into singapore. quite literally as it is starting in a few hours. again, i apologixe about this post. its a little sad, but the next one will be better. pinkly promise.
see you all soon!!!
#not a tag#from saph#saph explains silly season 2024#every image on this post is 4 pixels im sorry#las vegas gp 2024#if this doesnt post i give up#Youtube#Instagram
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Sunday Spins #1
Welcome to Sunday Spins first post! Let me start by saying thank you for making your way here! This weekly blog will shine light on 3 new tunes that are currently on my radar, then rewind it back to 1 older song that I hold near and dear to my heart. Top 3 New Tunes of the Week #1. Give A Little - Maggie Rogers I've been listening to Maggie since her first EP, Now That The Light Is Fading (2017), which I ended up purchasing on a 10" vinyl because of how much I loved it. Give A Little comes from Roger's newest album that dropped on January 18th and it has been on repeat since. Although it was released in April of 2018, the day of the national school walkout in protest of gun control laws in the United States, it holds up as the perfect start to this album. With it's light-hearted, dreamy feel and bouncy beat, it keeps you bopping from start to finish. My favourite thing about this song in particular is layered vocals in the chorus that sings "give a little, get a little", it gives me major HAIM vibes, who I am also a big fan of, and I am here for it. #2. I Know - King Princess (Feat. Fiona Apple)
Though this isn't a "new song", this new recording and collaboration with King Princess brought attention back to the emotional track I Know originally performed by 90's queen Fiona Apple on her album When The Pawn... With some added electric guitar riffs and the rawness of King Princess's voice harmonized with Fiona Apple's, it adds another level of melancholy to the already emotionally charged lyrics. King Princess is quickly capturing the attention of the pop-music scene with her consistent releases starting with her debut EP Make My Bed released in June of 2018 followed by single Pussy is God (2018) and modern cover of the Velvet Underground & Nico's Femme Fatale (2018). I can't wait to see what this LGBTQ+ icon does next! #3. I Need Yoü - Ånanę This chill new track comes from local Toronto underground hip-hop artist Ånanę. Released just 2 weeks ago, I Need Yoü starts off 2019 with some simple blues guitar chord progression and relaxed beat along with Junior Anane's uniquely deep and smooth vocals. He sings "uninvited, uninspired, undesired" in such a way that portrays the exact emotion of feeling low in confidence and certainty; the feeling of when you just need to be held and felt understood by someone to get you through the storm of thoughts that crowd inside your mind. Ånanę is known for his emotional and honest lyrics about his personal struggles in life and his childhood. He has been releasing music since mid 2018 and you can find more of his tracks on both Apple Music and Soundcloud. Rewind << We're Going To Be Friends - The White Stripes (2001) This song comes from the iconic album White Blood Cells by The White Stripes. This is an adorable acoustic story of the simplicity and innocence of being a kid in grade school and making friends and it has come back into my life recently as I've made my own new friends. When I first started at Metalworks Institute for Music Business, my biggest fear was making friends. The first friend I made was Sebastian, who lived in Toronto and had just moved from south Africa only a couple days prior. I was also living in Toronto at the time and was lucky enough to own my own car, so I took the opportunity to offer him rides to school to save him the trouble of the terrible commute with the TTC and Go Transit systems. After a few weeks of early morning drives to class and sunset rides back to Toronto with a grand total 2 hours spent in the car daily, we had much to talk about and became good friends. We exchanged music that inspired us, discovered countless albums and artists and talked about the all things in life that we have yet to understand like politics, taxes and the education system; you know, fun stuff like that. During my first week of school, I also became friends with another group of pals who were already friends before coming to Metalworks. On the first day of school, I nervously gathered up the courage to talk to them. Mack, Moira and Pav all seemed to be interested in a lot of the same things as myself; indie bands, unhealthy amounts of coffee, patterned socks, memes, etc. it made sense. I kept hoping that I was cool enough to be hangout with them. One Friday afternoon, Mack invited me to join him and Moira for lunch since Pav had Music Theory class during our 2 hour break in-between classes. After a couple more breaks spent getting brunch together at the Crooked Cue and discussing what we had just learned, we became inseparable. Fast forward to now – 5 months later; we're living in a small house together in Hamilton and I’m cozied up in my twin-sized bed, just about to fall asleep until I hear the faint sound of acoustic guitars. It’s Mack and Sebastian strumming and singing away to We’re Going To Be Friends in our furniture-less living room. And I couldn’t be happier. I can tell that we’re going to be friends for a long time.
#king princess#anane#fiona apple#music blog#sunday spins#white stripes#maggie rogers#vinylly home records
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This is a first draft. I just wanna hear opinions
It's been three days without a new case. You know how boring that is? It feels like Chief is torturing me. Cases are assigned everyday, everyone else got a case, so why don't I?
"Villan, give me a case man."
"No. Captain gave these to me so back off." she said not even looking up from her files.
"Kels, give me a case will ya? I'm bored outta my mind."
"No can do Johnny, Palen said so."
"Okay, what reason can Palen have for not assigning me a case? I came to work on time for the last... Week?"
"You were late yesterday!" Villan said.
"No one asked you Theo!" I shout over, "Anyway, Kels man, give me a case! I'm dying over here!"
"Like I said John, I can't give you a case. Captain-"
"John! Captain wants to see you!" Zack,the captains secretary, shouts from his desk.
"Well, Kels, traitor." I jokingly say to her as I go to the Captain's office.
"You called for me, Sir?" I enter the room without knocking, which I know irritates him. There was another man standing in his office. He's in suit under a brown trench coat too, so either this dude is a fancy douchbag, a fancy political douchbag, a politician, a captain's friend, which is weird 'cuz he doesn't have friends, or an alien that doesn't understand human casual wear. My money's on alien.
"Adams, Knight." Captain pointed to me than him. We akwardly greeted each other and shook hands. By arkward I meant me taking my hand out from my coat pocket along with a dozen wrappers of candy, followed by me trying to frantically pick it up, almost whiplashing him with my head when I stand up.
"He will be your new partner."
"What? Come again? I thought you said partner."
"He will be your new partner." he said starting to get irritated.
"Does this mean you're finally assigning me a case? Why did you not assign me a case for the last three days?"
"I will and I didn't because your last report was unreadable because of the amount of coffee stains on it."
"It was a big case! You should be glad I solved that before Major Crimes stepped in!"
"You also didn't sleep for a week."
"Big case!"
"Anyway, Detective Knight will be your sitter."
"Sitter?! Come on! I worked here for the last... 2008,9,10... 5 years! I've been here five years and now you're assigning me a sitter? Does he even know what he's sitting?"
"Detective Knight is from the FBI, I'm sure he can handle whatever you throw at him. "
"FB- FBI?! You came from FBI!?" I turn towards him, what did he do to go from FBI to detective in this boring precinct?
He sighed "Yes." His voice is deep, I did not expect that. It's not batman deep though that's a dissappointment.
"Wow, what fucked up thing did you do to end up here?"
"I shot a superior officer." well, I fear for my life now, thank you.
"Nice." I say out of habit.
"Here's your case, now get out of my office." he shooed us out.
"So? " I started " Why the suit? "
"I fancy the style of detectives from 50's tv shows. "
"Where's your hat then? "
"Here. " he holds up his hand revealing a fedora. He must've been hiding it under his hands when I walked in. Or put it on the coat stand then took it while we were being shooed. Either way he's cool. I bet he smokes a pipe.
He sits down at my desk then puts his feet up, wait, he gonna have my desk, where's my desk gonna be? In the break room? Please be breakroom. Please, "Oh Captain" I enter his office again "Knight's sitting at my desk, why?"
"You're sharing. His arrives on monday. "
"Share? For a month? What did I ever do to you? I did all my stuff. Say it, what in the world did I do to you? "
"His desk arrives in 4 days. Also, might I need to remind you of the Stilton incident?"
"Nope! Goodbye, have a good day Captain!" I run out of his office, it's a miracle I didn't get fired because of that. Then again, I'm his star detective.
"So... " what the heck is his name again? How the heck did I forget, I'm a detective. Then again I left a marshmallow on my car heater and it destroyed it. "FBI, got a first name? " I'm 50% sure he didn't say his first name. Either that or his name is... Yeah, I can't remember.
"Henry. Henry Knight. " he has a cool name. Why the heck does he have a cool name. Imagine back in the bureau, Agent Knight. That's so cool! Then I'm stuck with Adams. Adams, John Adams. Oh like that president who mailed his diary pages instead of notes to congress? Like that president who hates Hamilton? ...yeah. Why couldn't I be named like Lafayette, Or even like Hercules. Im just named John Adams. Meanwhile my new partner is named Henry Knight. Henry is cool enough, because Henry is Indiana Jones' real name. And then he has a last name Knight, that amplifies the cool. You know what? I'm gonna change my name. I'm gonna change my name to Indiana Jones. Fuck you Henry Knight. Ha!
"Who are you? " Villan asks Knight extending her hand for a handshake.
"Knight, Henry Knight. Adams new partner"
The he kissed the back of her hand. "And who might you be, beautiful?" and he's a flirt. Just when I thought he couldn't be cooler, the only way he can be cooler is if drinks respects women juice and if he ain't racist. Why did I include racist? Well, If I remember my history class, colour segregation ended in like the 70's.
"Keep it in your pants Theo! " I shout while walking away to get a chair. Pretty sure saved Knight from Theo's horrible, horrible flirting.
Seriously last time I've seen Theo flirt was when I watched her on her date and you know how she flirted? "I like your tie, it's very blue. Like-uhm... Your eyes. " The dude's eyes were brown.
Ugh. The only chairs here is the crappy lawn chair and crappy metal chair. Which one shall I make my back endure for six days... Lawn chair that will break when I lean back or metal chair that will break my back when I lean back? Or, I can tell him to sit on this. Nah, he's too cool, if he tells me to sit my ass down on a smoldering fire pit, I'll sit. Crappy lawn chair it is.
When I come back from the Storage room he's there charming everybody, they all like him. You know how long it took for people to start talking to me? A year. And that was when they only need to. And he's here just getting along with everybody. I get that he's good lookin',but what is it about me that stops people from talking to me? Is it my hair? My jacket? What?!
They all stop talking and look at me. What the heck did I do? Maybe it's the chair dragging along the floor.
"Don't mind me, just gettin'a chair. " and I continued to drag it behind me awkwardly while everyone stares.
"Daisy, that's a lovely name... " Knight dissolves the silence. Knight, I owe you lunch. You're so cool!
While Knight is bonding with everyone else I get to work. I open the case file... And it's a classic B&E,it's easy,come on,video footage,fingerprints,the guy's unmasked.Easy.I run his face through the face scanner thingamajig aka The Seeker.
*bing* It's done. And our mystery man is... No matches? What do you mean 'No matches?'. This guy is off the grid? This case got more exciting.
Nope, it didn't get more exiting. The guy had a latex nose and cheeks on. Me and Knight caught him when we were visiting pawn shops, see if they bought or pawned any items that were stolen. A guy comes up the counter and says
"Sal! Check out what I got! " then put a game console on the counter, we identified it as the missing console because the owner custom painted it. I asked "Nice, where'd you get that? " then he leaned awkwardly close and whipered "I stole it down fourth street.Don't tell anyone. " then he laughed.
He had the disguise and all, then he just boasts that. Ofcourse I asked where he got the disguise dude said the his friend was practicing her skills as a make-up artist and he thought it was a good idea to rob people then boast about it. 'Course we asked the friend if she had anything to do with it,she said she didn't and provided an alibi.She was doing an interview and we confirmed it.
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space songs - redux
i posted the first version four months ago but newsflash, asshole! i’ve been expanding the list the entire goddamn time!
noor miracle of sound - amnesia miracle of sound - distant honor billy talent - don’t count on the wicked
singer billy talent - half past dead
kestra rise against - from heads unworthy miracle of sound - shadow of the ash rise against - re-education (through labor) billy talent - this is our war ashtar command - deadman’s gun
naras billy talent - kingdom of zod
kestra & naras billy talent - dead silence billy talent - horses and chariots john waite - missing you
alecto the overtones - gambling man sam butera & the witnesses - let the good times roll mark ronson ft. bruno mars - uptown funk miracle of sound - jet fuel heart
vim miracle of sound - going nuclear ac/dc - shoot to thrill alabama 3 - woke up this morning paul engemann - push it to the limit johnny cash - hurt
ninida miracle of sound - hell to pay two steps from hell - shoot to kill mgmt - kids judas priest - you’ve got another thing coming
ninida & harlei walk the moon - shut up and dance alice cooper - bed of nails rise against - this is letting go fall out boy - american beauty/american psycho fall out boy - irresistible ac/dc - you shook me all night long DNCE - cake by the ocean
vitriol miracle of sound - kickback
jens, elis two steps from hell - norwegian pirate
jens & hahen eric clapton - tears in heaven
rowan & elis frank sinatra - fly me to the moon
rosta/quail hozier - take me to church rise against - make it stop trans-siberian orchestra - christmas eve/sarajevo abba - gimme! gimme! gimme!
rosta & david derek and the dominoes - layla
charon gerry rafferty - baker street the smashing pumpkins - bullet with butterfly wings
rosta, charon rise against - the strength to go on
rosta & charon rise against - tonight we dance nightwish - amaranth
mor rioghain miracle of sound - commander shepard
joseph black strobe - i’m a man men at work - land down under
joseph & mor rioghain miracle of sound - the crush
shaina miracle of sound - khajiit like to sneak
jehan miracle of sound - digital shadow
mirad uriah heep - lady in black fall out boy - i don’t care mike posner - i took a pill in ibiza
mirad & jack maroon 5 - moves like jagger
mirad & joseph the black keys - lonely boy n’sync - bye bye bye nickelback - how you remind me taylor swift - we are never ever getting back together
maz & moran shakira - whenever, wherever reo speedwagon - i can’t fight this feeling anymore
hecate hamilton - you’ll be back
breanndán avenged sevenfold - shepherd of fire avenged sevenfold - hail to the king miracle of sound - hell in the headspace
onóra miracle of sound - the moment two steps from hell - victory
cäzilia cranberries - zombie
kiurz daft punk - harder, better, faster, stronger the black keys - gold on the ceiling (style and sound) duane eddy - rebel-rouser
the raptor nickelback - burn it to he ground chumbawamba - tubthumping
violeta bananarama - venus taylor swift - shake it off
nevan janet jackson - nasty kesha - woman spiderbait - black betty bad religion - fuck you
violeta & noor franz ferdinand - dark of the matinée
amil the killers - somebody told me
malachi miracle of sound - paleblood moon
taliesin jon licht & daniel licht - honor for all (voice headcanon) kansas - carry on my wayward son (lyrics, style not to much) metallica - the unforgiven bad religion - sorrow the white buffalo - come join the murder
dán & taliesin miracle of sound - pawns of war metallica - sad but true bon jovi - you give love a bad name rolling stones - gimme shelter metallica - disposable heroes
cäzilia & taliesin hiroyuki sawano & benjamin anderson - so ist es immer
radovan adam lambert - runnin’ elton john - i’m still standing phil collins - in the air tonight
radovan & aaron snow patrol - chasing cars tokio hotel - love who loves you back coldplay - yellow
jules daft punk - get lucky ac/dc - rock’n’roll singer
solinore old gods of asgard - balance slays the demon
#no doubt this is going to expand and then like four months later i'm going to post a new edition#but i've been tweaking this for long enough#i haven't spoken of taliesin and he's (she's? they're?) very much in the works anyways#all i know that they worked with dán and it ended nastily for them so now they just try to sap him as much as they can
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The man in the car. 2.7.17
“This song is from Hamilton.” I said to the man in the car as he drove, impressed that a song from Broadway had made it onto mainstream radio station.
He paused a moment. I knew he’d seen it.
“Well.. I liked the play, but their politics-”
“I didn’t mean to go down that road.” I said aloud, suddenly self-aware of my inadvertent collision of politics and pop culture.
“You know.. The play is good,” he started, “but I don’t need these actors to embarrass the Vice President of the United States during a show.”
“I’m sorry-” I repeated, now annoyed with myself, “I didn’t mean to bring it up.” I put my hand up in a wall formation between the two seats so as if to physically cull the conversation to a halt.
“I’m sure that the people in Hamilton, because they’re up and coming,” he made sure to assert, “are good and hard-working. But I don’t need these rich actors and Hollywood types telling me how to think. Meryl Streep- what an asshole.”
“With 8 golden globes.” I added.
The car fell silent.
“Okay..” I tried to politely re-engage. “Well, what about Scott Biao?” I offered for comparison. He was the only staunchly pro-Trump, outspoken (pseudo-famous) actor I could think of. Matthew McConaughey hadn’t surfaced in my brain yet. I’m on medication.
“Scott Baio is one of the few republican thinkers..” He said with some consideration. And a B-list forgotten actor from Baywatch, I silently added in my head. I found it strange the inexplicable slide in approval from Streep to Baio, but I didn’t attack. I just silently ‘computed.’
“You know, it’s just surprising to me..” I blurted out suddenly. But it was too late, I had to keep going. “I guess- I just thought that at some point in this campaign, you would have seen how radicalized this had become- whether from the comments about women to now the Muslim ban- and been able to stand back and say, as thinking, rational human, ‘this isn’t right.”
“I support everything Trump is doing.” He responded devoutly. (I cringed inside, but kept my eyes steadfast on the road.) “Everything he’s done has been legal. We need to keep this country safe from infiltration. You know, this country has swung way too far to the left, to the people on the peripheries.”
I knew what he meant by that. These were euphemisms. These were racist euphemisms. What he meant was, ‘We need to keep the country safe [from foreigners], free from infiltration [of anyone who challenges our old American ways of thought / who is different from us in terms of skin color or religion.]’
There is a divergence of thought here, for he and I. Whereas I embrace diversity and feel as though immigrants add to the brand of the US, and frankly, in many cases, are more highly-achieving and/or hard-working than many of the white “born here” (read: entitled) American counterparts with a high-school eduction and no drive or ambition but an axe out for competition, he feels this same paradigm can be summed up by the words “illegal” or “infiltration.”
‘This country has swung way too far to the left,’ he said, ‘[to minorities and people of color, women, gays, those who have been ignored for so long: the people on the peripheries.]’ It was as if he was saying, “It’s my turn again- it’s my turn again as a white man when times were good. It’s my turn to bring back the industrial revolution days of the baby boomers and ease when money just rolled in and there was no adversity / diversity in the workplace.
THAT DOESN’T EXIST ANYMORE, OLD MAN. Can I say that? IT DOESN’T EXIST. This isn’t 1965. This is 20-fucking-17. We Skype interview. We use drones at football games. I haven’t called a restaurant for a reservation since 2009, #opentable. Black people should start being paid what white people get paid. Gay people should be happily married and those who haven’t seen two men love one another should either make a lunch date to understand it or crawl back inside their Bibles and shut themselves inside because the world. is. changing, and no one is hiding anymore. We are beautiful in all of our resplendent shades of biodiversity.
Alas. It wasn’t my time to start the education process on how we haven’t operated this way for 45 years. I was more rendered speechless by the fiery sense of subjugation this guy was feeling from people ‘on the periphery’ finally having a voice.
The silence was heavy and hung in the car like a swamp.
“You realize you do have two gay sons and a daughter, right?”
“Trump isn’t going to touch the gays.” He stated, almost on touch-dial. He’s said this before and it was just as embittering this time as it was the first time I heard it.
“Don’t tell me that.” I snapped back.
“He isn't. He sees the gays as a productive, powerful group of society. He won’t touch them.”
I didn’t realize society was comprised of chess pieces, and that the gays, though a minority, fell somewhere in the realm of Knight to Rook category. I’d be inclined to perhaps go as far as to say ‘Bishop’ if we hadn’t been cast aside from the church for so long. And by this sort of understanding I suppose that meant blacks and women must be pawns.
“I don’t like that you support a government regime that you rest on a philosophy of ‘they won’t touch you,” like that is some kind of peace prize. “The other party-”
“I’m sick of having my rights revoked on behalf of everyone else.” He blurted out.
The car went silent again, but a hot, oppressive silence as if it were filled with smoke, and we needed to exit the vehicle. ‘This.’ I thought to myself. ‘This is what this comes down to.’
He pulled the car into the driveway into a corner spot near the door and chimed in, “If the gays were to come under attack, I would be the first one to fight for you.”
“No, you wouldn't.” I responded, matter-of-factly.
“Yes, I would.” He fought back.
“No. You wouldn't.” I stated, not as a rebuttal but as a declaration of truth.
I stepped out of the car and walked toward the front door, stopping to turn around.
“You realize that I was only legally allowed to get married around 2013, right?”
“So what does that matter?” He asked, opening the driver’s side door.
“To be able to get married like other people?” I asked rhetorically. “It’s humanizing.”
“Well, you don’t have that problem right now.. And.. Marriage isn’t what it’s cracked up to be.” I didn’t understand the inability to understand. The wall of ignorance to other peoples’ battles and vulnerability or perhaps the unwillingness to empathize that reduces it to comedic humor or flippant commentary.
“Good night, dad.” I said as I opened the door to the house, unsure of where we stand anymore in our relationship when it comes to politics. And with all of my might, I pulled from within my gut a recalcitrant and hard-fought, “I love you.”
@cnnpolitics @msnbc @newyorker @abcnews @newyorker @newsweek @mediaite-blog @theatlantic @newyorktimesofficial
#love#trump#donaldtrump#republican#democrat#democracy#tumblr#justinthecity#myblog#nycblog#personalblog#lifestyle#personal#lifestyleblog#dad#family#politics#politicalblog#funnyblog#instagram#share#like#read#reblog#follow#sharethisblog#likethisblog#readthisblog#followthisblog#facebook
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Applying For Quick Payday Loans in Hamilton
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Applying for a quick payday loan is quick, user-friendly and straightforward. Compared to its competition, quick payday loans provide a couple of benefits store front check cashing and payday loans location don’t. Using your computer or smart device you can apply for a quick payday loan in the comfort of your house if you’d like. There is no longer a need to hang out in crowded stores through this option. Standing in line waiting to get to the counter. Only for some disrespectful worker to yell commands at you. Applying online is much safer and more relaxed than going to a physical store or a lending institution.
Something Else To Consider When Applying For A Quick Payday Loan
Because it typically takes a few minutes to complete the online form, it is a serious time-saver. Quick payday loans are much more hassle-free compared to in-store loan applications. Which must be handwritten and will need to be completed in the store. And in the unlikely event an in-store applicant does not have all of the needed documentation and information, then their loan application will not be complete. And incomplete information will hold a loan up from being processed.
It Is Easy To Apply For A Quick Payday Loan in Hamilton
You will be expected to complete a short application to apply. The majority of the payday loan lenders will consider you eligible provided you have a steady job, and an active bank account. You might have to send a copy of your last pay stub to show proof of employment. But for 100% sure you’ll need to send then your bank account information. After all without that they can’t send you the money. Some payday loan lenders grant no-fax quick payday loans. These are an useful option for people who have their paychecks deposited directly to their checking accounts. The wonderful thing about a quick payday loan is that credit history isn’t a factor in consideration for approval for a loan. You can still get approved for a loan just as long as you meet the minimum requirements of the lender. Despite the fact that your credit is less than ideal. Once approved, the amount you've borrowed will be deposited into your checking account. Usually within 24 hours.
Paying Back Your Quick Payday Loan
Most payday lenders when it is time to pay back your loan will just pull the amount from your checking account. Unless you make the decision to roll it over or pay back a part of the loan. The majority of the payday lenders will require that you give them a 3 day notice before the due date. However, not every lender grants this option. And if they do it isn’t to all borrowers The most ideal absolute best way to go is to simply borrow no more than what you really need. If all you need is $200, only borrow that much. Remember these loans do have interest expenses associated with them. So borrowing more money right now than you need doesn't make any sense. If later you figure out you need another loan you can always go back to paydayrooster.com and apply for an additional loan.
Quick Payday Loan Terms
When applying for a quick payday loan, it is crucial that you consider the lenders terms. The term on most quick payday loans in the Hamilton area ranges typically from 5 to 30 days and often coincides with your next payday. When applying most lenders will mandate that you list your next two pay periods. To borrowers that have had repeat business have been extended a flat fee price once in a while by a lender. This is where the lender will lend to the borrower a sum of money. However, not set a time for when it has to be paid back. While others will vary their interest rates depending on loans duration.
Fees of A Quick Payday Loan
At the moment, the fee charged on a quick payday loan in Hamilton range anywhere between $10 - $15 for each $100 borrowed per week. However rates raise and lower. It all depends on the lenders and what they are willing to do. The cost of getting a quick payday loan should be regarded as a service fee. Making it a fair comparison. Keeping in mind that financial institutions charge a $35 non-sufficient funds fee per check.
Last Words
Since no one likes to borrow money from friends and family. Getting a quick payday loan is a terrific option. And other options like pawning something or bouncing checks isn’t always an option. Avoiding late payments which leave negative marks on your credit report is something a quick payday loan can help you with. If you need to apply today visit paydayrooster.com
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Fast and Reliable Car Title Loans in Hamilton. No credit or Bad credit a problem. You can still borrow up to $50000 at lowest interest rates. Just call us at Toll Free: 1-888-886-SNAP(7627)
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Women Facing Murder Charges in Stabbing Death of Little Havana Man
Two women are facing murder charges in the killing of a man who was found stabbed to death inside his home in Miami's Little Havana neighborhood last month.
Viviana Hernandez, 25, and Natasia Andrea Gonzalez, 21, are facing charges including second-degree murder and grand theft auto related to the killing of 63-year-old Jorge Aneiros Avila, arrest warrants said.
Tanker Hijacked by Rescued Migrants Arrives Safely in Malta
According to the warrants, the investigation began when officers responded to the building at 1928 Southwest 6th Street after tenants reported a foul odor. The officers discovered the body of Avila, who was wrapped in a sheet and appeared to have been dead for a few days.
Avila had been stabbed in the back, and his vehicle was missing, the warrants said.
Hernandez and Gonzalez were arrested in Hamilton County, on the Florida-Georgia border, on March 12, after they were found in a car that had been reported stolen in Miami-Dade, the warrants said.
Gonzalez admitted to killing Avila and said she returned to his home to steal some items that police believe were later sold to a pawn shop, the reports said. Hernandez also admitted to using a knife to kill Avila, the warrants said.
The warrants said fingerprints belonging to Hernandez and Gonzalez were found in Avila's apartment. When Avila's abandoned car was found, detectives found blood as well as the knife, which was concealed inside, the warrants said. A wallet with Hernandez's identification was also found in the car, the warrants said.
Hernandez and Gonzalez were brought back to Miami-Dade Thursday to face the charges. Both remained held without bond Friday, and attorney information wasn't available.
Photo Credit: Miami-Dade Corrections Women Facing Murder Charges in Stabbing Death of Little Havana Man published first on Miami News
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Hungarian GP: Jolyon Palmer column - Desperate Bottas risked massive controversy
Hungarian GP: Jolyon Palmer column - Desperate Bottas risked massive controversy
Hungarian GP: Jolyon Palmer column – Desperate Bottas risked massive controversy
Former F1 driver Jolyon Palmer, who left Renault during the 2017 season, has joined the BBC team to offer insight and analysis from the point of view of the competitors.
Mercedes Formula 1 boss Toto Wolff described Valtteri Bottas’ drive in the Hungarian Grand Prix as that of the “perfect wingman” – but it was a role he took way too far after playing it so well for a long time.
The Finn’s drive for two-thirds of the race was excellent in protecting team-mate Lewis Hamilton from the faster Ferraris.
But in the closing laps Bottas seemed to lose his head, and he came close to causing what would have been a massive controversy.
Had Bottas damaged Sebastian Vettel’s car in his clumsy attempt to regain the place when the German overtook him, the inquest would have been long and hard.
It’s worth exploring what happened, how Bottas came so close to taking Vettel out, and what it means for the rest of the season.
The first part of the race
Thou shalt not pass: Bottas kept the Ferraris at bay while allowing team-mate Hamilton to pull away
Bottas joined Hamilton on the front row of the grid at the Hungaroring. Behind in the wet in qualifying by a very respectable 0.26 seconds, he was off Hamilton’s pace throughout the race as well.
The Mercedes drivers converted their one-two on the grid into the same positions at the first corner, and when Hamilton built a 3.5-second lead after only five laps, it was clear Bottas was in a defensive race against the Ferraris.
Mercedes were particularly worried about Vettel, the big championship threat, who after qualifying only fourth had dispatched team-mate Kimi Raikkonen on the first lap.
And so Bottas’ wingman adventures began…
With Bottas’ pace still dropping away in the first stint, and Vettel behind him, Hamilton was allowed to build a buffer to the Ferrari of 8.6 seconds by the time Bottas pitted on lap 15.
With Ferrari seeming to have the faster car in the race, it was a crucial gap to have. It kept Hamilton out of Vettel’s reach throughout the pit-stop phase.
Bottas pitted early – too early.
The stop appeared to be in response to Raikkonen stopping the lap before, to stop his fellow Finn getting ahead by running faster laps on fresh tyres before Bottas pitted – the so-called under-cut.
In fact, the intention must have been to stop Vettel getting the jump with the under-cut, because a slow stop meant Raikkonen was too far back to be a threat.
Stopping so early meant Bottas’ job for the remainder of the race was always going to be extremely tough, because he now had 55 laps to do on a set of soft tyres – considerably longer than their predicted range.
From there, Bottas was destined to be a sacrificial pawn in the Mercedes victory bid.
The critical second phase of the race
Pitting early meant Bottas should keep track position from Vettel, because in theory with new tyres his pace would be better and he could ensure the Ferrari did not get far enough ahead to be able to pit and rejoin in front of the Mercedes.
But for a long time, the theory wasn’t working out, because while Bottas was managing tyres to ensure they lasted, Vettel was stretching his advantage. The result was that for nearly 10 laps Vettel had enough of a gap to pit and re-emerge ahead of Bottas. If he had, Mercedes’ gameplan would have been over.
Fortunately for Mercedes, a mix of traffic for Vettel, poor pit-stop timing from Ferrari, a slow stop and some sudden quick pace from Bottas – two fastest laps in a row – meant when Vettel pitted, Bottas managed to keep his second place.
So Bottas’ wingman duties resumed…
Once Raikkonen pitted for a second time, Mercedes might have been expected to pit Bottas to cover him off. After all, let’s not pretend Ferrari weren’t using Raikkonen purely as bait to entice Mercedes into pitting Bottas and paving the way for Vettel.
This ploy worked the first time, but not the second.
Mercedes chose to keep Bottas out for a couple of reasons.
Firstly, because overtaking around the Hungaroring is notoriously hard. So track position is absolutely key, and Bottas had it.
Secondly, because if Mercedes had covered Raikkonen, Vettel would have had free rein to chase Hamilton down for the win. On newer, softer tyres, the Ferrari would surely have been able to apply some pressure on him later in the race.
The build-up to controversy
Bottas and Hamilton have each signed contract extensions at Mercedes in recent weeks
Bottas drove a brilliant race from lap 40 to lap 64. On older tyres, with much less pace, he kept Vettel at bay. This was the exceptional wingman performance Wolff was describing, and it helped Hamilton win the race.
On lap 65, though, Bottas took his wingman duties to a new extreme.
Vettel’s attacks were getting more and more persistent and dangerous heading into the closing stages. Bottas’ rear tyres were visibly ailing, and when he couldn’t get the power down on the exit of Turn One, Vettel finally seized the opportunity to pass.
It’s fair to say Vettel arguably could have given Bottas more room on the inside as they headed to Turn Two. Vettel did close the door to take the apex and could have been more cautious, but Bottas never should have tried to recover the position in the manner he did.
Vettel was just about fully ahead, Bottas was coming at the corner from completely on the inside, hugging the grass, and he was never going to be able to make it stick. Bottas was behind Vettel, on older, less grippy tyres, and on the dirty part of the track. Vettel’s move was done.
Instead, Bottas kept coming, went partially over the kerb, locked his wheels, and hit Vettel from behind.
I think it was desperation from Bottas – he wasn’t fussed about crashing with Vettel at that point and put his car in a position where a crash was almost inevitable.
This comes just weeks after Wolff and Hamilton had accused Ferrari of unfair tactics after two incidents in a three-week period in which a Ferrari had collided with a Mercedes on the first laps of the French and German Grands Prix – accusations they later withdrew.
In my opinion, the Bottas incident in Hungary was the most questionable of the lot.
For F1’s sake it was good (and lucky) Vettel managed to continue unscathed – because if he had retired after that hit from Bottas, it could have put a real taint on what has been a breathtaking season so far.
In the end, Vettel finished second and Bottas picked up damage – ultimately his comeuppance – and Vettel was magnanimous afterwards.
If Vettel had retired, I think the inquisition from Ferrari and governing body the FIA would have been a deep one.
The Ricciardo battle
Bottas has been given a 10-second penalty and two penalty points for his clash with Daniel Ricciardo
Bottas’ demolition derby was not finished there. Having picked up damage from the Vettel incident, and with his tyres absolutely shot, he had Daniel Ricciardo’s Red Bull up behind him and lapping three seconds quicker on newer ultra-soft tyres and a fully intact car.
If Bottas’ move on Vettel was desperate, his defence against Ricciardo was plain foolhardy. With a damaged car and worn tyres, he braked as late as Ricciardo at Turn One as the Australian went for a fair move around the outside.
In a normal fight, Ricciardo is known as one of F1’s latest brakers. But with Bottas driving a hobbled car, his defence was nonsensical. He was never going to slow down sufficiently.
Inevitably he locked up, couldn’t stop the car and drilled into the side of the Red Bull. It was as if he had let his rational thinking go.
Somehow they both recovered and even when Mercedes, acknowledging Bottas was out of order, told him to cede the position to Ricciardo, he refused and fought tooth and nail once more with the Aussie.
All the wheel-to-wheel action showed the mental state Bottas was in during the latter stages of the race.
Out of character for Bottas
After the Bahrain Grand Prix earlier in the year, I questioned Bottas’ wheel-to-wheel race-craft, but since then we’ve seen a much better, more committed Bottas.
In Hungary, he was far too committed, but I think on this occasion it was the frustration of how the race had unfolded that had boiled over and he lost his head in the heat of battle.
It was the most un-Bottas-like few laps, and it continued after the race had finished.
He was asked about Wolff’s remarks calling him a wingman, and he said he was hurt by them.
Any driver would feel the same way, hearing that effectively they are reduced to number-two status. And Bottas looked as unhappy as I’ve seen him after a grand prix, even if later on he said he “understood” and had no problem with it.
A mix of a lack of pace, some bizarre high-profile crashes and probably most of all the team politics had made it a very tough afternoon emotionally.
A reality check for the Finns
The second half of 2018 is likely to see Bottas and Raikkonen thrust ever more into supporting roles
F1’s four-week summer break has come at a good time for both team and driver.
Bottas has driven brilliantly on the whole this year and undoubtedly deserved the new Mercedes contract that was announced before the German Grand Prix.
But only one pole position and no wins this season, despite some great drives, will be weighing on his mind, especially given his team-mate’s success.
Whether or not team orders have been applied so far this year is a moot point. But, for me, Budapest was finally the moment when both Ferrari and Mercedes clearly placed all their eggs in one basket.
Bottas was a sacrificed wingman for Mercedes, but over in the red corner, Raikkonen was exactly the same for Ferrari, just in a more lower-profile way.
Some people will not like this, but with this season being so close, and with only two drivers left in genuine contention for the championship, it has to be the right thing for the teams to do.
Both Bottas and Raikkonen have had their moments this season, but ultimately the second half of the season is going to be the Hamilton v Vettel show.
And the wingmen will have an increasingly important role.
BBC Sport – Formula 1 ultras_FC_Barcelona
ultras FC Barcelona - https://ultrasfcb.com/formula1/10745/
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[Eugene Volokh] Short Circuit: A roundup of recent federal court decisions
Please enjoy the latest edition of Short Circuit, a weekly feature from the Institute for Justice written by John Ross:
Friends, state laws restricting homemade (or "cottage") food sales may be needlessly hindering entrepreneurship, particularly among women in rural, lower-income households. That's according to Flour Power, a first-of-its-kind report on the industry from IJ Research Analyst Jennifer McDonald. Click here to read it.
FBI agents impersonate journalist, trick bomb-threat suspect into revealing himself. Journalists: That's a concerning tactic. Tell us more. FBI: We have conducted a comprehensive search of the relevant archives and are unable to find more. D.C. Circuit: The FBI Director himself said there was more in a letter to The New York Times. Search again.
Wholesaler sells imported versions of FDA-approved medicine, medical devices; is convicted of misbranding them as FDA-approved. Second Circuit: New trial. The wholesaler should have been able to tell the jury that a lawyer (a former prosecutor with experience in FDA compliance) advised them they weren't breaking the law.
Former Honduran soldier enters the U.S. illegally. Back in Honduras, gangsters -- whose compatriots the soldier once helped imprison -- assault his family and friends in effort to find him. BIA: He missed the deadline to petition for asylum. Send him back. Fourth Circuit: Not so fast. The escalating violence back home renders the deadline flexible.
Man is convicted of rape in 1986 after victim identifies him (though perhaps not reliably). Yikes! In 2009, it emerges that Detroit crime lab tech goofed up forensic test. At trial, she told jurors that testing did not exclude him; she now says he could not have been the perpetrator. Sixth Circuit: That's not new evidence; the foul-up could have been discovered at trial. Habeas denied. (The man has been eligible for parole since 1994 but maintains his innocence and so won't be released.)
Former employee programs ATMs to dispense $20 bills while only debiting $1 from bank account, steals $600k from the "infelicitously named SafeCash Systems." He's caught. But wait! The company takes the ATMs out of service (because they don't comply with new federal rules on accessibility for blind customers). Destruction of potentially exculpatory evidence? Sixth Circuit: Convictions and one-year sentence affirmed.
Low-IQ teenager confesses to grisly murder (the subject of Netflix's Making a Murderer documentary). Suppress the confession? No need, says the full Seventh Circuit; though many worry the investigators' tactics can elicit false confessions, the Supreme Court hasn't condemned said tactics. Dissent: A travesty. Investigators fed him the details they wanted him to admit to and harried him till he did. Another dissent: The courts need to start treating the risk of false confessions more seriously; we know of at least 227 of them.
One "might be forgiven for thinking there is not much question about whether attempted murder and attempted armed robbery are violent crimes," writes Judge Hamilton of the Seventh Circuit, but it ain't so -- at least when it comes to sentencing.
Pine Lawn, Mo. cop displays incumbent mayor's campaign sign in convenience store window over the objections of the owner; the opposing candidate removes the sign (which has her mugshot from a past arrest on it). The officer threatens to frame the store owner for drug possession if he does not help frame the opposing candidate for theft; he then arrests the candidate, has local TV film a perp walk. Eighth Circuit: The officer's conviction is affirmed. (Related: He was not a good cop.)
To promote student achievement, prevent bullying, and instill numerous moral virtues, Reno, Nev. elementary school requires students to wear uniforms with motto "Tomorrow's Leaders." Parents: Which is compelled speech. Ninth Circuit: The motto requirement does indeed violate the First Amendment, though we'd give it a pass but for precedent we are bound to follow.
Helena, Okla. prison kicks inmate out of kosher diet program because staff say he ate a non-kosher meal, which is grounds for suspension from the special meal program. Inmate: I took no cheat day; the staff retaliated against me because I annoyed them, and supervisors declined to review video that would have cleared me. Tenth Circuit: This suit should not have been dismissed.
Liquor store owner sues Marathon, Fla. officials in state court for misusing their regulatory powers to devalue the property. The city removes the case to federal court. Eleventh Circuit: Ah, but federal courts cannot consider regulatory takings claims unless the state court has first issued an opinion, so case dismissed. Try suing in state court.
Georgia man pawns his car, files for bankruptcy shortly after. Georgia law says the pawnbroker can keep the car; federal law says the bankruptcy court can "modify" a creditor's rights to such an asset. Eleventh Circuit (over a troubled dissent): "For better or worse," state law controls, and the pawnbroker now owns the car.
Federal officials decline to register trademark claimed by clothing company "fuct" because it is the phonetic equivalent of a scandalous term. Indeed, the company's products feature "hellacious or apocalyptic events" and "other imagery lacking in taste." Federal Circuit: Which is unconstitutional in light of the Supreme Court's recent ruling in favor of "The Slants."
Attention law students! Every summer, IJ hires the best, brightest, and most reasonable law students to clerk across all seven of our offices in Arlington, Austin, Chicago, Miami, Minneapolis, Seattle, and Tempe. Clerks get an unparalleled opportunity to impact IJ's cutting-edge constitutional litigation. Not only is the summer extremely substantive in terms of work product, but students also participate in intensive legal and communications trainings, attend seminars, and integrate fully into IJ's office and culture. Learn more about the program here and apply now.
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