#Caldwell fields

[chaoticdesertdweller]

[elenitrack]

Abbey Caldwell and Jessica Hull 🇦🇺

2023 World Athletics Championships (Budapest)

[beatrack92]

Abbey Caldwell 🇦🇺

2023 World Cross Country Championships (Bathurst)

[cosmicfocus]

The Jewel Box

The sparkling Jewel Box cluster and a wide field view of the Southern Milky Way

An Open Star Cluster Caldwell 94 in Crux Image exposure:25.5 minutesImage Size:Size: 1.79° x 1.19 °Image date:2024-05-13 The Jewel Box (NGC 4755) is one of the most popular star clusters in the Southern Hemisphere, famous for its dazzling beauty and a great hit at public outreach nights. The brightest stars in the cluster form an “A” shape (although in this image the “A” has fallen on its…

[divinebronzegoddess]

Grey Reflections: Episode 27—A Kinder, Gentler Christian Grey

If you would like to “Buy Me a Glass of Wine,” you can click this link or the ***DONATE*** link at the bottom of the menu on the left. All previous disclaimers apply. Episode 27—A Kinder, Gentler Christian Grey CHRISTIAN My son is due to be born in six weeks. In a little over a month, I’ll have two strapping young boys and a gorgeous little girl. I’m one lucky bastard. It’s Sunday morning and…

[dirtylaundryshow]

🤫🍸Now presenting: the trailer for Season 4 of Dirty Laundry - premiering August 13th only on Dropout!

Join host Lily Du and bartender Grant O'Brien for new season of secrets, drinks, and ridiculous stories with guests: Anna Garcia, Jasmine Bhullar, Carl Tart, Ify Nwadiwe, Siobhan Thompson, Amy Dallen, Rekha Shankar, Yvie Oddly, Kim Chi, Naomi Smalls, Meatball, Geoff Ross, Adam Conover, Jeremy Culhane, Jess McKenna, Amanda Lehan-Canto, Mike Trapp, Becca Scott, Sam Reich, Caldwell Tanner, Jordan Myrick, Pallavi Gunalan, Angela Giarratana, Priscilla Davies, Eugene Cordero, Tawny Newsome, Gillian Vigman, Noël Wells, Natalie Bolton, Cirie Fields, Parvati Shallow, Ethan Zohn, Noah Grossman, Arasha Lalani, Chanse McCrary, Spencer Agnew, Tommy Bowe, Shayne Topp, Daniel Kountz, Andrew Lawrence, Raviv Ullman, Davida Williams, Adam Chase, Sam Denby, Ben Doyle, and Michelle Khare!

[boujiestpoet]

STARCROSSED

SOCIAL MEDIA/NEWS chapter 1: Appaled

NEXT CHAPTER.

MASTERLIST

Summary: Two people and the rest of the world discover that their partners ain't shit

FACECLAIM: The extraordinary Tems

THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION. THE BEHAVIOUR OF THE CHARACTERS DOES NOT REFLECT THE REAL PERSONALITIES OF THE INDIVIDUAL UPON WHOM THEY ARE BASED. I AM MERELY BORROWING THEIR PHYSICAL LIKENESS AND THE PROFESSION THEY HAVE FOR THE SAKE OF THIS NARRATIVE

TW: Cringiness from the writer, grammatical errors (have mercy english is my semi firsr language)

Heartbreak in Hollywood: Renee Bennett’s Devastating Betrayal by Boyfriend Ben Field and Best Friend Leah Dawn

By: Sarah Caldwell | Celebrity Insider

In a shocking twist that has left fans reeling, beloved actress Renee Bennett has found herself at the center of a scandal that could rival any of her on-screen dramas. The star of the upcoming epic “Northern Winds” has been blindsided by the ultimate betrayal—her boyfriend, model Ben Field, and her best friend, influencer Leah Dawn, were caught in a scandalous embrace that no one saw coming.

The Scandal Unfolds: A Shocking Revelation

Renee Bennett, who recently returned from a grueling five-month shoot in Norway, had been looking forward to reuniting with her boyfriend, Ben Field. The couple, who had been dating for nearly two years, were widely regarded as one of the most stable pairs in the industry. But all that came crashing down when Ben and Leah were spotted kissing in New York City, a moment that has sent shockwaves through Hollywood.

Paparazzi captured the scandalous moment late last week, with Ben and Leah sharing a passionate kiss outside an upscale Manhattan restaurant. The photographs, which quickly went viral, have left fans in disbelief and sparked a media frenzy. To make matters worse, Renee had just returned to the U.S., believing she was coming home to her loving boyfriend—only to discover this devastating betrayal.

Best Friend Betrayal: Leah Dawn’s Double Life

What makes this betrayal even more heartbreaking is that Leah Dawn wasn’t just any woman—she was Renee’s closest confidante. The two had been inseparable for years, often seen vacationing together and supporting each other through the ups and downs of fame. Leah, a well-known social media influencer, had built her brand on the image of friendship and loyalty, making this act of treachery all the more shocking.

Leah Dawn was also dating F1 driver Charles Leclerc, a relationship that had its own share of drama. Rumors swirled that Charles was on the verge of proposing to Leah, but according to a recent blind item, his mother was reportedly not in favor of the union. The news of Leah’s infidelity has now thrown that relationship into question, leaving fans to wonder if the engagement is now off the table.

Renee’s Response: Silence Speaks Volumes

Since the scandal broke, Renee Bennett has maintained a dignified silence. Friends of the actress describe her as “heartbroken” and “utterly blindsided” by the betrayal. Renee, who has always been known for her professionalism and grace, is reportedly focusing on her career and taking time to process the situation away from the public eye.

“Renee is devastated,” a close friend revealed. “She never imagined that the two people she trusted most would betray her like this. Right now, she’s just trying to come to terms with what happened and figure out her next steps.”

Where Do They Stand? The Aftermath for All Involved

As for Ben Field and Leah Dawn, neither has made a public statement about the scandal. However, insiders suggest that both are facing significant fallout. Ben’s modeling contracts may be in jeopardy as brands distance themselves from the drama, and Leah has lost a significant number of followers on social media as the public turns against her.

Charles Leclerc has remained silent amid the scandal, leaving fans wondering about the status of his relationship with Leah. The F1 driver has not been seen with Leah since the photos emerged, and sources close to the couple suggest that the situation has left him reeling. With rumors of a potential engagement now in doubt, it’s unclear whether Charles will continue his relationship with Leah or if this scandal has irreparably damaged their romance.

A Love Story Shattered

This heartbreaking turn of events has left fans and Hollywood insiders alike questioning how such a betrayal could happen. Renee Bennett, who has always been the picture of strength and grace, now finds herself facing one of the most challenging moments of her life. As she navigates this painful chapter, her fans are rallying behind her, offering support and urging her to stay strong.

While the future remains uncertain for all involved, one thing is clear: Renee Bennett’s story is far from over. This betrayal may have shattered her trust, but it has also shown the world just how resilient she truly is. And as she steps into the next phase of her career, all eyes will be on Renee to see how she rises above the heartbreak and emerges stronger than ever.

Author's Note: And I'm back as I promised how do you find the social media chapters, advices are always welcome

[stone-stars]

[ID: Caldwell’s cover for Lullabies from the Wild Side. It shows a field of sunflowers, with an autumn forest and a spring meadow in the distance. Behind them are a castle and a snow-capped mountain. The sky shows the arcs of stars traveling across it, centered around a solar eclipse, around which the EP title is written.]

caldwell’s cover in full quality, from his bsky!

[ierofrnkk]

Organized generally by the actors that play each character. Requests are open!

Oscar Isaac

Fics

Many Moons Are Deep at Play - werewolf!Steven Grant x reader

The Sum of His Parts - Steven Grant x reader

Summer’s Over - merman!Cecil Dennis x reader

I Love You, Go Back To Sleep - Poe Dameron x reader

So Much More Than Everything - Llewyn Davis x reader

Forget To Remember - DDDNE William Tell x Reader

Bots

Basil Stitt - he ended things on a weird note

Blue Jones - you’re his favorite girl

Cecil Dennis - he’s a merman

Cecil Dennis - not the brightest boyfriend

Cecil Dennis - forgot his meds (AuDHD!Cecil)

Jake Lockley - rainy late night drive

Jake Lockley - first date

Jake Lockley - it’s too hot out (FTM!Jake)

Jonathan Levy - it’s getting late

Jonathan Levy - caring for you after a long day (CG!Jonathan)

Jonathan Levy - toddler dad

Joseph - you’re betrothed to joseph

Llewyn Davis - inexperienced dad

Llewyn Davis - he needs your couch for the night

Peter Reuter - he needs to ensure that you meet

Steven Grant - omega!steven (a/b/o)

Steven Grant - anxious (omega!steven)

Steven Grant - dysphoria (FTM!steven)

Steven Grant - help him stay awake

Steven Grant - cuddling on the couch

Victor Frankenstein - he needs your help with an experiment

Vincent Caldwell - you’re always in his mind

Hugh Jackman

Drover - he’s not so talkative

Eddie Adler - you’re his new roommate

Jack Willis - he really does love you

Logan Howlett - happy retirement

Logan Howlett - waking up early

Wolverine - roommates

Dev Patel

David Copperfield - you’re lodging with him

Deon Wilson - you have his undivided attention

Gawain - the knight

Saroo Brierly - still lost

The Kid - you clean him up after a fight

Timber Woods - the radio’s broken

Jay Baruchel

Dave Stutler

- best friends, right?

- he takes you to his lab

- cozy night in with your bf

- he’s texting you!

Oliver Whynacht - mortician’s assistant

Misc.

Calvin Weir-Fields - semi-successful author

Danny Foster - coworkers

Eli Brooks - amateur filmmaker

Eric Bottler - you reunite at a halloween party

Ethan Whyte - he wants the best for you

Hutch - he’s got the hutch touch

Jam Bruce - the drummer

Jay Cavendish - he’s indebted to you

Josh Levison - he’s a wolf

Newt Scamander - magizooligist

The Eleventh Doctor

The Twelfth Doctor

header creds to @silvernight-m !! 🩵

[forbadorb]

The North American Nebula - Caldwell 20

150x30s 6400iso on a Nikon d800 on two nights

Askar 71F Flat field quadruplet 70mm f6.9

Unfortunately due to how I've had to connect the camera, I was forced to crop out most of the frame to get this. The noise is also pretty awful but I can attribute that to the high ISO on an older camera in bad shape.

Overall, I'm pretty proud of this, I worked hard to get everything properly in focus and tracked properly, as well as I finally took the time to learn siril and ditch DSS for anything other than live stacking

[dr-futbol-blog]

Trinity, Pt. 9

We then find Sheppard and McKay alone in the Ancient facility, setting up the experiment to try again. While they are alone, their interaction is very different from the previous night. What ever they may or may not have discussed on their way there just by the two of them in the jumper, Sheppard seems already to be in a foul mood. There is very little left of their soft tones and openness to one another, both of them seeming closed off and reserved. Once they get to talking, their dialogue is curious.

McKay: I appreciate your support, Colonel, but... Don't worry, I try and make it a habit not to make the same mistake twice. Sheppard: That was a joke, right?

Now, why would Sheppard think that not wanting to repeat one's mistakes is said in jest? Why does he seem offended by the notion?

The thing is... this is the first time we hear McKay call him Colonel. McKay called him Major when he was talking with Caldwell in The Intruder (S02E02) and was corrected by him, confessing to Caldwell that it would take a while for him to get used to that. He also mentioned Sheppard's promotion to Ford in The Runner (S02E03). And let us recall that even when we saw McKay call Sheppard Major, in a meeting, during the final weeks of their long wait for the wraith to arrive after they had clearly already been intimate, Sheppard reacted to it not unlike he had been struck by McKay. But thus far we have neither seen nor heard McKay call Sheppard Colonel, not once. This is the first time. And even though it might be something that he had generally taken up doing now Caldwell was around, right at this moment, they are alone on an alien planet and not in contact with Atlantis. It is just the two of them. Even if Colonel was something that McKay was accustomed to calling him, when they are alone there is no need for it. It is superfluous, it is unnecessary. He might just as well have said "I appreciate your support, but... don't worry". He inserted that Colonel there on purpose. And that is precisely what this is about.

Also note that many transcripts render the syntax incorrectly here. He does not say "I appreciate your support, Colonel. But don't worry, I...," he says "I appreciate your support, Colonel, but...," and these are two very different things. McKay makes it sound like he is saying that he does not really need Sheppard's support, which is nonsensical. It is as though McKay is responding to some comment that Sheppard had just made, is continuing some conversation they were having earlier, and we never got to hear the beginning of it. Sheppard had been telling him something, had been explaining him something, perhaps about the discussion in Weir's office that McKay had not been present for. Sheppard might have been telling him that Weir still had her reservations. He might have been warning him about the inevitable involvement of the Pentagon. It is clear from McKay's response that he is turning down something that Sheppard had offered up. I appreciate your support but there is no need for it. I appreciate your support but I have no need of it.

Sheppard is not offended by the notion that someone might want to fix their mistakes. That is something that he appreciates in a person, he explicitly tells us so in Tao of Rodney (S03E14). I also want to emphasize the fact that McKay had made no mistake the first time. There was no mistake. Like he said, in terms of Physics, it should never have happened. What he told Sheppard was that it was the Ancients who had made a mistake, not him. According to him, the calculations of the Ancients were wrong and he proposed to modulate the containment field manually himself as he thinks that he will be able to do this better than the technology of the Ancients. There was also a lampshade thrown on this whole exchange in the previous scene where Weir asked Sheppard whether McKay could guarantee that the same thing would not happen again and Sheppard told her that no one could do that, so he has no expectation for everything to go as advertised here. Therefore the mistake that McKay is referring to has to be something else. There was no mistake during the previous test run. The mistake he is referring to is something else. The mistake he is referring to is having come to Sheppard, expecting to be let in. Asking to be let in to his room. That is the only mistake McKay has made recently.

Sheppard is upset that McKay threw his refusal to admit him into his chambers the previous night right back to his face by referring to him by his official title here, just between them. It is his title, to be sure, but there are not many worse things that McKay could have called him. And two episodes hence, when Sheppard tells Teyla to call him John, this is the thing still chafing him then. Make no mistake, McKay has been calling him John in private by this time. We may not have heard it, we will not get to hear it until the 4th season, but he has been using Sheppard's name when they have been alone together. The scene from the previous night was the first truly private scene we have seen between them since the ending of The Defiant One (S01E12). And even now, it was only Caldwell's presence in Atlantis that allowed us to see it. It was because Sheppard was forced to tell him no that we got to see it. The end of The Defiant One, how they were the previous night, that is how Sheppard and McKay are like when they are alone together. The show has been going out of its way not to show us these moments.

But they are not that here, now, even though they are alone. Because McKay was hurt by the rejection. He is telling Sheppard that he is not going to repeat that mistake again. Even though he is glad to have been given the opportunity to finish the experiment, he is nigh manic in fact, his feelings were hurt and he is petty enough to want to return the favour. No, Sheppard is not looking at him like that because not wanting to repeat one's mistakes seems absurd to him. He is looking at McKay like that because the person he knows most intimately out of anyone he has ever met had just put space between them, had just established a perimetre around himself through calling him by his title while they are alone together. McKay is letting him know that if his position in the military is the thing that makes Sheppard withdraw, to literally close him off, is the thing that is perpetually wedged between the two of them, then that is what he is goddamn well going to play along with. Colonel.

McKay: No. I offer you my personal assurance that a surge like the one that happened before is inconceivable.

Now, McKay might be referring to what happened previously when the test firing went awry. That is probably very likely what he is referring to. That is the logical interpretation of this. And yet, it may not be the only thing he is referring to. He seems faux-innocent here, like he has no idea what Sheppard might be on about. Why would he be joking about something like that? Only, there is an obvious subtext to what he is saying. McKay is telling Sheppard that there are not going to be any repeats of what might have happened after Duet (S02E04). He is not going to surge at Sheppard again. It is inconceivable that Sheppard might find him behind his door in the future. If Sheppard does not want him then he is not going to keep throwing himself at him, of knocking at a door that isn't going to open.

And even if McKay hadn't intended it like that, it does not mean Sheppard could not have heard it like that. Sheppard is much more accustomed to using innuendo than McKay is, and here he seems not quite sure what he is hearing. Usually McKay is straightforward about what he means. So he might be reading into this. But then again, it is so in your face. McKay sounds upset, he sounds resentful, he sounds like his feelings have been hurt and none of this makes any goddamn sense if they are colleagues and nothing else. If that was the beginning and the end of it, McKay should be feeling grateful and nothing more.

Sheppard: Do you wanna run some power-up simulations first? McKay: How about I carry out my plan and you keep the hot coffee coming? I was joking, again, right?

You can really hear McKay's hurt feelings here, as he interrupts Sheppard and seems to belittle his contribution. And this in turn appears to hurt Sheppard's feelings, and it does seem like a hurtful thing to say. When two people know each other very well, it is so easy to find the most hurtful thing to say in any given situation, just like Sheppard had in his reference to the morgue earlier. It is as though McKay is making it clear to Sheppard that he is only here as manual labour (not unlike the Athosians Teyla was offering as manual labor at Belkan) because he is simply not an intellectual match to McKay. And because Sheppard fears this is true, he fears that this is what McKay truly thinks about him, he is hurt by this.

But then again, this is not really that different from Sheppard telling McKay to get started on the sandwiches in the previous episode. It was banter during a tense situation meant to let out some of the steam for both of them to be able to concentrate on what they were doing, and this may even be how McKay intended it, but the underlying bitterness is what made it come out harsher than he meant. McKay feels no need to disparage Sheppard's intelligence and he does not feel superior to him. Besides which, this seems to confirm that bringing coffee to McKay is something that Sheppard has done (and hence, again, confirming that the sandwich in Letters from Pegasus (S01E17) and probably also the pastry in this episode were brought to him by Sheppard). Later, in Allies (S02E20), we see Sheppard walk into the lab with a tray that has cups of coffee on it. Here, he is bringing them to the lab at large but the fact that he sets the tray down on the table and then proceeds to take one of the cups for himself to drink like it's a routine action suggests that he has done this before, he has brought coffee to the lab for himself and another, many times.

This is something that Sheppard has done often. And based on what McKay says here, he had already been doing it by this time. And while being fed and watered in such a way was often because McKay's mind was occupied by other things, important things, that made him forget about things like eating and drinking and hence required someone to take care of his hypoglycemic self, one might think that he did not even pay attention to this, that he wouldn't even notice that someone had done something like that for him. And not noticing, not paying attention, he would not appreciate it sufficiently. He might not be thankful enough for someone who thinks he never says thank you.

But this tells us that he had noticed, and he did appreciate it. Because McKay feels awful, he feels hurt and is hence lashing out, it is because the gesture is so meaningful and loving, because he appreciates it so much and feels like he does not deserve it, that he decides to use it as a weapon here. And as far as weapons go, it is a precision strike missile. It hits the target. Sheppard feels as though McKay had just called him "the help," and given his social background, being likened to a butler or a waiter is offensive, to be sure. And Sheppard feels that it is wholly undeserved, too, because where McKay thinks that he was doing it for his career, not letting him in the previous night, he was actually also doing it for McKay. He did not think either of them were in the right state of mind for it just then.

Sighing, McKay raises the question "where were we?" and that certainly is an interesting question when it comes to the two of them. Neither of them knows where they are right now. All they know is that both of them are hurting, they are hurting each other, and it does not seem like they have the means of resolving this.

What is interesting is that there is nothing in the main-text that explains McKay's behaviour here. He just comes across as a dick for absolutely no reason. They had a heartfelt exchange the previous night, Sheppard went out of his way to help the guy out and McKay got exactly what he wanted. He should have been content, he should have been grateful and appreciative. Sheppard had come through for him, and he was able to do something that he felt was important. What, he suddenly out of the blue got an acute case of hubris? He just cannot keep his ego in check even at the cost of the lives of people working for him? He is chasing the tail of the Nobel dragon so badly it turns him into an asshole? He is just that socially inept as to not realize how offensive he is coming across?

No, if Sheppard is being driven by his fear of abandonment, it is McKay's need for approval that is at the heart of his behaviour. It is rejection that hurts him the most, of feeling unwanted, not being chosen. They have a fundamental disconnect in the fact that he is Sheppard's first choice for everything but he interprets Sheppard's behaviour as evidence of the opposite. Back in Weir's office, Sheppard had just put his career on the line to do something for McKay. He had chosen McKay over his brass. It was not an easy choice but he could not have chosen otherwise. He chooses McKay again and again and again. But McKay does not see it, is incapable of seeing it. Because he has come to expect it, he experiences rejection from Sheppard continuously and because his strategy is to be so abrasive toward people that they inevitably do the thing he expects them to do anyway, to preemptively treat people like they are not going to want him anyway, essentially to reject them before they get the chance to reject him, it is that hurt little boy inside him that is crying for help that we see coming out here. Hurt people hurt people, as they say. And it is McKay's hurt that is clearly driving him to hurt Sheppard in return here, having interpreted Sheppard's rejection as an intentional attempt at hurting him.

Their preparations are interrupted by a call from Atlantis with an order, which Weir once more fails to formulate as an order, to delay the test. And this gives Sheppard the opportunity to question her call, to want an explanation for why they should do as she says. We see Zelenka rolling his eyes at this, clearly thinking that the Colonel has spent way too much time around McKay.

Weir: Colonel Sheppard, this is Atlantis. Sheppard: Go ahead. Weir: Is Doctor McKay with you? McKay: Of course I am, but we're a little busy getting ready to run a test here. Weir: Actually, I would like you to delay the test firing. Sheppard: Why?

Weir asks whether McKay is with Sheppard, and his answer is "Of course I am," just like when Beckett told him that Sheppard was his man in The Siege (S01E20) and his answer was "Of course he is." But both times there was a but. But he was training pilots and deploying space mines then. But they are a little busy right now. Of course they would be together but there is always something between them.

Now, although Sheppard's question here is clearly meant for him to get more information so that he can assess the level of danger of doing what they were about to do, to figure out whether he needs to pull the plug to make sure nothing happens, it is possible that McKay hears his question in the tone that he makes it as evidence that Sheppard really wants to see the weapon go off because he thought it was cool. Sheppard is short with Weir where his tone is likely more related to what McKay had just said to him than anything else.

Weir: We have reason to believe that the weapon's power source, it may not be controllable at any power level. McKay: Radek? Zelenka: Rodney... McKay: OK, we have been over this. I am doing this manually, at half power. It's a cakewalk. Zelenka: I don't think it matters how much cake you walk on.

Given that McKay had done his own calculations three times and from what he can tell, he had to correct Zelenka's calculations previously, he is well within reason to doubt Zelenka's math and to think that he is being overly cautious here. It is also frustrating him that he feels like he is having to fight everyone on this where all of them should be working toward a common goal. McKay honestly thinks that he is not the problem here, or that he is in the wrong. He has done his due diligence, the math seems to be mathing, and all that is left is to run the experiment whose potential benefits far outweigh the risks. What he told Sheppard about Daghlian, he actually seems prepared to give his own life up for science and he seems very much to be repressing the thought that it is not just his own life he is risking here. It is another reason why he needs to put that distance between himself and Sheppard.

Now, this was never a battle of wits. This isn't about whether McKay is more intelligent than Zelenka, this isn't McKay's ego running roughshod over his reason. This is about him wanting so much for this to be true, for this so succeed, for him to be able to fix his mistakes and to provide all mankind, but most of all the people he cares about, with a precious gift. Besides which, he has not heard any good arguments as to why he should suddenly think that he is in the wrong.

Zelenka: I've been doing calculations of my own and I believe that the very act of trying to contain vacuum energy from our own space-time creates an environment where the laws of physics cease to apply. McKay: What are you on about?! Zelenka: As power output increases, new and exotic particles are continuously created and destroyed inside the containment chamber, interacting with each other and with the field itself.

Both Weir and Sheppard seem to struggling to understand what McKay and Zelenka are discussing. Sheppard looks concerned as he watches McKay, and he seems to be listening to his tone of voice more than to the words themselves. He is observing McKay's body-language. Zelenka's argument is that something happens which causes the laws of Physics to cease to apply, and given that McKay has dedicated his entire life for the pursuit of finding order in chaos through science, has been clinging to Physics as something that might explain the unexplainable, that might allow him to control his environment through understanding it which is something he had direly needed as a child, telling him that the laws of Physics do not apply here is like he had just told him that his entire life's work is gobbledygook and that the answer is magic. It is as though Zelenka had just presented him with the kind of calculations that he described in the constructed reality of Home (S01E09) as saying that "this reality isn't governed by any natural laws. It's like looking through a microscope at a cell culture and seeing a thousand dancing hamsters!" The benefits still far outweigh the chance that Zelenka might for some absurd reason be right about this.

Zelenka: Eventually particles are created that cannot be prevented in this space-time and they breach the containment field as hard radiation. McKay: As long as I'm monitoring the energy output manually, I can stop that before it happens. Zelenka: You cannot predict something that is inherently unpredictable. Sheppard: Rodney... McKay: I know what I'm doing.

Zelenka's mistake is thinking that they are having a scientific discussion and that he would be able to convince McKay with a rational argument. The truth of the matter is that it had ceased being about the science for him when he had turned his face away from the still smoking corpse of Collins. It had ceased being about the science when he had watched the Ancient satellite platform blow into a million pieces. It had ceased being about the science when he had to watch Dr. Gaul eat a bullet right in front of him. It had ceased being about the science when he had walked inside the dark entity to hurl a naqadah generator through an open wormhole. Science is just a means for doing what he needs to do.

But more than that, Zelenka fails to realize that he is not having an argument with his colleague. In actuality, he is trying to convince a twelve year old scared little boy who clings to science as a way of trying to control something that is inherently unpredictable, his parents who hated each other and took it out on him. Who had tried to save himself through music that had this... perfect order for him, but whose dream of becoming a concert pianist had been crushed by a teacher who told him to quit. He had told Carter that he turned to science to find his salvation because he thought it would be different but that it had turned out to be just the same, as much of an art as anything else. It isn't his ego that they are unable to penetrate. It is a little boy trying to protect his sister from having to go through what he had gone through that they fail to reach. A little boy who had to know what he was doing, who had to have all the answers because someone depended on him.

With Zelenka, McKay is still able to pretend like they were debating the issue. But as soon as Sheppard voices his concern, he snaps at him. Because although Zelenka works for him, it is Sheppard seeming to switch sides and ganging up with the others against him that feels like a betrayal. Sheppard may be concerned for his well-being. Sheppard may be trying to keep him safe. But McKay isn't thinking about all of that. He is thinking that he would never have sided with someone else against Sheppard. That is what being loyal was all about. Notice how, although Sheppard only speaks his name, McKay turns his entire focus on Sheppard. He is the only thing that matters to him, and it isn't just because the others are not physically present.

Zelenka: Rodney, I am trying to tell you as a friend, I have serious doubts. McKay: Well, you're wrong. I'm sorry, but there it is. And to bring this up now when I am just about to do this smacks of nothing but professional jealousy.

First of all, it is interesting that they emphasize the fact that Zelenka is doing this as a friend. Zelenka is not telling this to McKay as a colleague but as a friend who cares about him. This is contrasted with Sheppard that likewise cares about McKay but is not doing it as a friend. But because he is feeling threatened, McKay retorts with the most hurtful thing he can think of, taking a page out of Sheppard's playbook from earlier. He is lashing out, he is trying to strike a nerve because he feels cornered and like everyone is ganging up on him for no good reason.

But note that Sheppard is starting to have serious doubts here, as well. It is especially as McKay says the words "I'm sorry but there it is" that we see him look into the distance and blink rapidly, as though he is remembering something. Either he has heard those words from McKay previously, he has said them to McKay previously, or they are words that he has longed to hear from McKay previously. And given the tone with which McKay spoke them, the first option seems the most likely. And the likeliest time for him to have heard those specific words from McKay was when they must have had that discussion about McKay needing more time back on Earth.

Zelenka: Fine! Kill yourself, just like the Ancients did! Sheppard: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what do you mean by that? Zelenka: I believe if the overload is allowed to continue, the weapon acts as a sort of release valve to prevent catastrophic containment failure. The Ancients barely managed to shut it down, and they lost their lives in the process.

Notice that as soon as Zelenka implies that McKay may be in danger, Sheppard steps forward and gets closer to McKay. They are in radio contact with Atlantis, he can hear Zelenka just as well from where he was standing as he can from his new vantage point. There was absolutely no reason for him to step closer to McKay to ask his question. It does not make him hear Zelenka any better and it will not make Zelenka hear him any better. He steps forward like he would be able to place himself between McKay and Zelenka's words. He steps forward because it is his instinct to protect McKay as soon as he senses any danger, and Zelenka's retort had just thrown his internal systems into DEFCON 4. While he usually wants McKay to explain things to him, right now he needs Zelenka to do the explaining because it seems like McKay is not in a very forthcoming mood and as much as he respects McKay, as much as he wants to support McKay in this, if there is a danger of McKay dying, he needs to know about it.

Weir: What we're suggesting is that the wraith didn't kill everyone on that planet, it was the weapon itself. Sheppard: That would explain why this place is the only thing left standing. McKay: Yes, congratulations! You've solved the mystery of how the Ancients screwed up ten thousand years ago. It doesn't mean that I will do the same. Look, I don't know how else to say this, but none of you are capable of understanding this on the same level that I do. And Zelenka, that includes you.

While McKay clearly snaps here, he makes sure to look up as though making sure that Sheppard understands he is speaking to Zelenka and Weir and not to Sheppard, because while Sheppard was the last person to speak to him, he is not really intending to use the tone of voice that he does here with him. He is airing his frustration but Sheppard had not even been arguing against him here, he had just extrapolated on what Weir and Zelenka had been saying, trying to make sure he understood them correctly. But what is real interesting here is that as soon as McKay says "Look!" Sheppard actually does as he says. He looks up at McKay. He does what McKay tells him to do, and he does it immediately and without further ado (and what is even more interesting is that he actually starts doing it before McKay starts saying it as though he is responding to the thought and not the utterance). McKay implied that Sheppard had a Pavlovian reaction to the mention of weapons "like Dr. Vogel with the pastries" earlier, his eyes lighting up at their mention. But this seems like an actual Pavlovian reaction, a conditioned response. Sheppard has such obvious physical responses to McKay that they can only be explained by them having had sex, and them having done it more than a few times.

Now, this seems to answer McKay's question from earlier: why would the wraith leave the facility intact? The wraith never came back to destroy the Dorandan home-world, it had been destroyed by the weapon itself. But Sheppard's question, why the facility still is intact when the the rest of the planet had been destroyed is answered at the same time--up to a point. Clearly there was potential for the weapon to destroy the entire solar system, perhaps even worse. And yet, even though the weapon had destroyed the wraith fleet and the rest of the planet, this particular facility was left standing. Something had stopped the catastrophic overload before it had a chance to do further damage and although it was too late for the Dorandans and the Ancients stationed there, and nothing in the solar system survived, it had left the facility standing. It had not destroyed the weapon itself.

They had found five corpses in the facility earlier, two of whom were close to the controls and three in the command access tube. Either the Ancients had managed to stop the overload or the weapon had jammed of its own accord. What is symbolic here is that they had achieved mutually assured destruction. In taking out the wraith fleet, they had also destroyed themselves. This is what we will watch Sheppard do in the next few episodes. He is internally closing in on a catastrophic overload.

Weir: Rodney, I cannot afford to lose either one of you. Now tell me: can you do this? McKay: Yes. Sheppard: Are you sure? McKay: Yes. Sheppard: Are you sure you're sure? McKay: I said yes! Sheppard: Because if you're wrong... McKay: I'm not!

Weir tells them that she cannot afford to lose either of them but as Sheppard seeks to confirm McKay's answer and to confirm his confirmation, for Sheppard it is McKay that he cannot afford to lose. Teyla had told Ronon earlier that in a negotiation the words spoken are often meaningless. And it is not what McKay says here that makes Sheppard choose to trust him, it is what he sees when he looks at him. Sheppard searched McKay's eyes for a long time, and it is not his conviction that he responds to. It is McKay's need that makes him relent. And here, Sheppard is placing his life into McKay's hands. He came here to protect McKay, to see to it that he would survive this experiment unscathed. Trust does not come easily to Sheppard, his need for control is as strong as McKay's (and if we recall Heightmeyer's advice from Duet (S01E04), one of them needs to let go of control), but he makes the choice to place his trust in McKay here. And it isn't that he expects the experiment to succeed. What he is looking for is honesty.

Also note that they are standing real close here. Unnecessarily close. Like kissing distance close. They are standing closer than any heterosexual man would be comfortable with, in an otherwise empty room. There is no Earthly reason for Sheppard to be standing this close to McKay, staring him in the eyes.

Sheppard: We'll call you back after the test, how does that sound? Weir: You'd better. McKay: I won't let you down.

Sheppard looks at McKay for a notably long time here, not saying anything. McKay meets his gaze head on. They seem to communicate something between them that once more we are not privy to but which both of them seem to understand. Even though the most obvious interpretation is that it would be something akin to what Weir had just said to Sheppard using her words, likely it is something more complicated than a mere "You'd better not". Communicating that thought does not require such a long sustained look, does not require for information to flow between them in both directions. The only explicit promise McKay makes to Sheppard is that he won't let him down. But later on Sheppard feels like McKay did let him down, or that he broke what ever promise he extracted from McKay here, wordlessly.

But what McKay says here does reveal his motivation for doing this. It is important for him not to let Sheppard down because ultimately he is doing this for him, to earn his approval. He wants to be worthy of Sheppard's love and if he could only get this to work, everything that is broken between them might be fixed. All the obstacles between them could be erased. Everything pulling them apart and tearing them asunder would be stayed and stilled. He is earnest in his desire to accomplish all that. And Sheppard mistakes this for honesty because McKay is so deep in self-deception that he actually believes he is being truthful.

Continued in Pt. 10

[kinomorebi]

What does your soul look like?

Freya Caldwell | A shadowed figure within a void You are the flickering shape in the darkness. The echo of something lost. Are you even there at all, really? Does anyone see what you are beyond the darkness that surrounds you? You were the first to lose yourself. You stumbled in the dark, and in trying to find who you are, you picked up all the wrong pieces of broken things. Can you still say that you are you if you have torn yourself apart and stitched yourself together with every monstrous replacement you could find? What is it that you think will make you whole again? Do you think that your teeth and claws can protect you? There is no monster trying to harm you. There is only you, and nothing can protect you from yourself if you insist upon your own self-destruction. You are the villain of your own story. There is no one you have harmed more than yourself.

Kyrie Santos | a white flame made of moonlight You are mystic. You are an enigma. You are a bright light in the darkest of times. A champion of justice, you fight for what is dear to you, and you take your duty seriously. Your sense of purpose comes from being helpful, from being needed. But your tragedy is that you are made of fire, and few would dare approach you. They will use your warmth. They will use your flames against their enemies. They will call you beautiful. But they will not touch you. They will not hold you. Some will even fear you, and you will readily keep your distance, for you have burned others before. You wish you could take it back, but the past cannot be undone. You will be the last person to forgive yourself, if you ever do. Why can’t you just let it go? Why do you keep burning yourself out when what you truly want is rest?

Violet Calhoun | a field of painted flowers. You are the gentle sigh of spring and summer. You are full of beautiful life. You were always meant to bloom in your own time, and your time has come. You were never meant to be a wallflower, but the center of the bouquet. But you would readily trade anything for another’s sake. You would give up your place beneath the sun so another may feel the light. A peacemaker, a diplomat at heart. Conflict is the bane of your existence, as a weed amongst your garden. Your greatest challenge is to learn to confront it, to face your fears and your doubts and approach your ambitions with confidence, lest the weeds slowly overtake you. And do not think it selfish of yourself to ask to be seen, to be admired amongst your fellow flowers. You are worthy of praise. You do not have to kill what is special about yourself to fit in.

Genevieve Pacheco | an ancient tree with gnarled branches. You are the old soul. You are a being full of quiet wisdom, but it did not come without earning it. Experience has weathered you quickly, yet you remain strong through it all. You are a bastion to those who need the support of a calm and resolute mind. The histories of the world are etched beneath your thick skin, and you hold dearly to things that others would quickly forget. You collect things within your branches, you give home to those left without, and you bear the weight of it all. But through all you have been through, you have not yet learned how to let go. You refuse to relinquish what you cherish so dearly and weep for every precious thing that falls from your branches. You must be careful, or else the past you cling to might destroy a brighter future.

tagging: @deficd, @kylo-wrecked, @nightmarefuele, @petitsdieu, @protectmypeople, @silverjetsystm, and you ♡ (yes, you!)

[tinyravenfeathers]

"And some dude named Jeff" Season 4 episode 10

The Jenkins Episode. LOVE IT.

Full disclosure: I am a lifelong DnD nerd. I started with 3.5 back in the 90s. I am this label, this label is me.

It's kind of sad that Dolores gives the cats a sunny upstairs room and Jeff lives in the basement.

...now that I think about it, why does the woman have like 12 cats in one room, that's gotta suck for the cats and everyone involved.

Especially if Desi has pink-eye and Otto needs suppositories. Ew!

I love how the only inaccurate thing about the DnD nerds first scene is that they're rolling the dice rather haphazardly. Jenkins throws a d20 and a d12 (I think) at the same time...different sided dice throws are not a thing. Multiples of the same kind of dice, yes, especially to calculate the damage of a hit.

And Jenkins tosses the dice AT the figures on the map/table. Yeah, no. A dice tower would probably be employed with that small a table, but I get how that would be less visually exciting/take up too much screen time.

The DnD nerds were DEFINITELY in on Jeff's switcheroo plan. We hear them talking about it when Jenkins comes down the stairs. They were totally expecting a different person inside Jeff. The way they set Jenkins up to reveal himself shows some LARPing skill in my opinion. I've LARPed, it's just costumed improve with stricter rules lol.

I'm less sure Dolores/Jeff's mother knew about the switcheroo. (I called her Gloria in one of my stories, I need to fix that.)

The Jeff buttslapping Jacob scene. And the awkward aftermath. *Chef Kiss*

Oh look, they've all got costumes. Shocked, I'm shocked. Definitely LARPers. But...why would they wear that stuff to break into the Library? How did Jenkins present this to them? "Think of it as a live dungeon crawl"? Okay, then I'mma gonna concentrate on supplies and some kind of knife, a first aid kit, a shield, maybe some rope...not a cape, a head dress, and fishnet stockings.

I would have loved to see a version of this with the actors switched--John Larroquette acting like Jeff-inside-Jenkins ("how about we...make some magic..."), Andrew Caldwell playing Jenkins-inside-Jeff ("would you please stop setting off booby traps!")

It's really sad how few lines Ezekiel has.

Personal head canon: Ezekiel did some of the stuff Jeff is doing. Only, you know, he hid it better and was a bit cooler about it. We've seen Ezekiel use Munchausen's Top, the Spinning Wheel of Clothos, and have the attitude that 'rubbing up against anything magicky' can be a solution to rescuing Eve and Flynn in that one movie episode so yes. This carefree attitude towards power is why Jenkins worries about him.

The "gimme that boom" scene. C'mon Jenkins get more into it lol.

The Library teaching Jenkins about the best aspects of himself through the analogs of the new librarians. Cleverness from Schmidt/Ezekiel, Joy from Aurora/Cassandra, Persistence from Dennis/Jacob.

The knighting. Beautiful. Also getting the innocents out of the way before something truly dangerous?

"You think that was bad?! Wait 'til I get hold of you!!"

The little speech Jenkins gives to Jeff "what's the point of having a life if one does not live it fully," was so incredibly pertinent and needed when I was in a low place that I named my long-form fic after it. I should get back to writing that.

Jenkins' potion needs a jolt of magic to make it work. Noted!

"Bye Mom!"

What the heck were Dolores and Asmodeus doing while Jenkins and Jeff were scuttling down the stairs and making their way to the basement? Damn, I hope she locked herself in a bathroom or something.

The lightsaber in Jenkins' hands wasn't cut to shreds right away. More Galahad magic?

Ringpop FTW

How did they not see each other had changed? so weird.

Back at the Library--the carnage of Jeff is hilarious.

Eve's kiss (instead of Cassie) on Jenkins came out of left field but okay.

Awesome ending. If Jenkins cares for you, he spends time with you.

Beauty.

So many ideas for my fic came out of this episode.

[ballparksaroundtheworld]

Wolfe Field, Caldwell, Idaho, USA

[robinfrinjs]

📸 Frédéric Le Floc'h / DPPI

24H Le Mans Test Day Report

The day was divided into two sessions, both 3 hours in length. There were a few drivers missing part of (or all of) testing with IndyCar, DTM, Formula 1 and Porsche races taking place the same weekend.

All IndyCar drivers missed all of the testing. Drivers missing testing are supposed to pay some form of a fine, but anyone competing in IndyCar is exempt from that.

Because of teams missing some drivers, several teams opted to choose some reserve drivers for the test. Teams are allowed to put a maximum of 5 drivers on the entry list. Not all drivers ran in the cars they were assigned to.

Session 1

Toyota's Kamui Kobayashi finished the session on top in the #7 car with a 3:28.467, already beating the fastest testing time last year by 2 seconds. Kevin Estre was 2nd in the #6 Porsche with a 3:29.270 and Robin Frijns was third in the #20 BMW with a 3:29.433

In LMP2 Job van Uitert was fastest in the #28 IDEC Sport car with a 3:37.044. He was followed by the #22 of Oliver Jarvis and third was the #14 of Louis Delétraz. The #14 was also fasted in LMP2 Pro/Am though the time was set by a Pro.

In LMGT3 the #78 Akkodis ASP Lexus was on top with a lap from Kelvin van der Linde who later travelled to Zandvoort for the DTM Race. Van der Linde set a 4:00.106. His teammate, Esteban Masson in the #87 Lexus was half a second behind him. Third was Sean Gelael in the #31 Team WRT BMW.

The session saw several interruptions, the first coming from the #3 Cadillac driven by Renger van der Zande. The driver came to a stop during his out lap on the run down to Indianapolis. The car had a fuel line issue. Race Control first opted for a slow zone, but this was later turned into a short red flag.

Following the red flag, Race Control simulated the new safety car procedure for this year which took a while.

During the session two LMP2 cars (the #33 and #47) suffered front suspension issues.

Later in the session a FCY was called as the #87 Lexus was stopped at the exit of the Dunlop Chicane, the car could continue. Only minutes later, there was another Yellow as the #15 BMW of Dries Vanthoor came to a halt. The team told Vanthoor to stop the car as they found abnormalities in the engine. The team eventually opted for an engine change which saw their running today severely interrupted.

The session eventually ended under a red flag as the #37 Cool Racing car of Lorenzo Fluxa went off at the exit of the Porsche Curves. This was the biggest accident of the session as the car was damaged on several corners. Fluxa was said to be ok by the team.

There were several stop and go penalties given due to track limits.

Results

Session 2

Porsche ended the test day with a 1-2 with a 3:26.907 by Kevin Estre in the #6 followed by Felipe Nasr who set a 3:27.142 in the #4.

Times were several seconds quicker than last year with lighter cars and very favourable weather aiding to that. Most cars set their fastest time in the second session.

In LMP2 Oliver Jarvis in the #25 APR Car led the field by over a second with a 3:34.704. He was followed by the #25 of Olli Caldwell who set a 3:35.981. James Allen was third in the #30 in the Duqueine car. The car was also quickest in LMP2 Pro/Am though the time was set by a Pro

In LMGT3 Sebastien Baud set the fastest lap with a 3:59.883 in the #82 TF Sport Corvette. Alex Tiberias followed with a 3:59.920 in the #27 Heart Of Racing Aston Martin. Augusto Farfus equalled his time in the #31 BMW while Sean Gelael was only 2 thousands slower in the same car.

The first interruption of the session came when the #10 Vector Sport LMP2 went off at Indianapolis. According to dailysportscars.com the team already wrote off a chassis during testing at Spa last week. Making this incident another big blow to the team.

During the red flag the #19 Lamborghini spun at Arnage and then drove almost 100M in the opposite direction to the way the track goes. The driver, Matteo Cairoli has had 1 penalty point withdrawn on his license and has been given a suspended 30 seconds stop and go penalty for the race. This means that if he repeats this infringement during any of the sessions next week, this penalty will be handed out.

Later in the session the #14 AO Racing car caused a slow zone followed by a safety car. PJ Hyett tried to overtake an LMGT3 car but instead made contact at the wall at Indianapolis.

Another incident took place somewhere during the session when the #47 Cool Racing Car had contact with the #88 Ford Mustang. The driver of the #47 was deemed at fault but only a warning was given.

During the closing minutes the #7 of Kamui Kobayashi went off at Indianapolis. This caused a red and a premature end to the session.

Results

Combined Results

[wingedsilva]

like dust for stars

Title: like dust for stars

Pairing: Ava/Beatrice

Summary: “Agent Silva, this is Chief Special Agent Beatrice Caldwell-Zeng. She is the section chief of the OCS and your reporting officer,” Superion waves a hand towards the woman, Beatrice, and then turns back to Ava, “Beatrice, this is our newest Special Agent, Ava Silva.”

“That’s rather a mouthful isn’t it,” Beatrice deadpans, and Ava can’t quite grasp the proper British accent that hugs her words. “Silva, it’s a pleasure.”

A strong hand is held out to her, but Ava can do nothing but gape for a moment. This was her Chief? An awkward moment passes between them and Beatrice cocks a stupidly attractive eyebrow at her before Ava shakes her head and finally thrusts her hand into the other woman’s to shake it. Her grip is gentle, but confident. Ava is praying to every god she knows that the Chief can’t tell how sweaty her hands are.

Or; Ava is accepted to her first field position at the Centro Nacional de Inteligencia, the primary Spanish Intelligence Agency, after three years behind a desk at Interpol.

Avatrice Special Agent AU.

ao3 link