#COVID postponements and cancellations

[girldickdotcom]

just found out this bikini kill tour i havent been able to attend is their farewell tour 😐🔫

[madmaryholiday]

so the plans for my brother's birthday are currently to get together tomorrow and go out to eat.

i am silently pulling my hair out, because while my mother is theoretically no longer contagious, she IS still coughing and sniffling like mad, and i just feel like. that is. RUDE??? to go out to eat in a public place when you are actively COUGHING???

also, my dad still has a sore throat and hasn't been to the doctor, and who knows how i'll be feeling tomorrow.

i'm just so goddamn tired, man. i know it's a bummer to not be able to get together on your birthday but it just seems obvious to me that displaying signs of illness should make you reluctant to be around other people. especially when one of those people is PREGNANT lmao i feel like i'm going fucking crazy.

and idk. maybe my head is just hurting a lot and making me less sympathetic to the need to mark one's birthday, but i would really rather wait until we're all no longer actively hacking and coughing all over the place. even if a doctor says you're not very contagious anymore.

ugh. okay, i'm gonna go do other stuff now before i work myself up too much over this.

[welkinalauda]

@ariadneofadhd 's tags

#Happy Salmon Slamming Saturday to all those who observe#alternatively : merry Christmas Adam#may he be less disappointing than usual

Portrait of a Salmon Slammin Queen

[sgiandubh]

And who would've thought... it figures

My attention has been very recently drawn to this very telling non-announcement:

[Source: https://hq.rostr.cc/insider/news/the-fratellis-sign-wtth-toura-toura; announcement published on February 24, 2025]

And surely enough, this was quietly confirmed by Toura Toura on the company's socials. It would also seem they have been collaborating for a while, now, even before the info was disclosed:

[Source: https://www.instagram.com/ltdtouratoura/]

[Source: https://www.facebook.com/touratourahq/]

It is even on the Booking Agent Info professional database:

[Source: https://bookingagentinfo.com/celebrity/the-fratellis/]

To quote: 'The Fratellis' managers used to be Anthony McGill' (..)'. Operative concept - 'used to'. Past tense. The three of them managers seem to have vanished into thin air. Oh my, what on Earth could have happened?

According to Companies' House, UK Government company register, Kevin Fitzgerald is the sole owner of two companies. The first company is Toura Toura Ltd, which nature of business is  'sound recording and music publishing activities':

[Source: https://find-and-update.company-information.service.gov.uk/company/11826082]

... and Toura Toura Festivals Ltd, which nature of business is 'performing arts' and which is doing just slightly better - its paperwork is ok, for the time being:

[Source: https://find-and-update.company-information.service.gov.uk/company/12502492]

The accounts' analysis is interesting, in a way, for there seems to have been very little (if any) turnover/profit in both companies for the last three years, with very mediocre balance sheet reports to boot:

... and...

Anyways, I am rather tempted to follow-up and report if anything new pops in, which might happen rather shortly, with last year's report overdue for the first company and due in about two weeks for the second one.

You might be forgiven of superficially thinking this entrepreneurial profile looks like another person's (ahem). It doesn't: his net assets are positive, despite the reporting negligence as far as Toura Toura Ltd is concerned. And the COVID pandemic might explain those financials, at least partially. For instance, in May 2023, Toura Toura Festivals landed in hot water, when the Wolverhampton Council completely let them down, canceling for the third year in a row the city's Creation Day Festival:

[Source and more details, here: https://accessaa.co.uk/toura-toura-festivals-seeking-legal-advice-after-creation-day-postponed-for-third-year-running/]

The man seems to have a good reputation in the business. I found this pre-COVID interview (February 2020) for a specialized blog very honest and quite endearing - excerpts follow:

[Source: https://vanadianavenue.co.uk/2020/02/12/indieterria-meets-kevin-fitzgerald-of-toura-toura/ ]

And then look who's on The Fratellis' following Instagram roster...?

[Source: https://www.instagram.com/thefratellis/following/]

Alan McGee, Fitzgerald's providential first client! Yes. Connections are always important, irrespective of the industry, but perhaps even more in that particular industry.

I strongly suggest you'd give five minutes to Mr. Fitzgerald's story of a single dad who has been through loss and found the power to reinvent himself. Clearly a very hands-on, proactive work ethic and perhaps the reason The Fratellis signed with him, after all?

So you see, I think there is a difference between 'working in the shadows' and being non-existent/not giving a flying fuck. I even surprised myself feeling glad for a perfectly unknown person's apparent comeback.

You might also think McGill's got other clients?

Chances are he doesn't, plus his profile isn't even claimed - now, why would that be?

[Source: https://bookingagentinfo.com/managers/anthony-mcgill/]

For comparison purposes: the profile is checked by Fitzgerald himself and the clients are there. I didn't bother to look further - it's crystal clear.

[Source: https://bookingagentinfo.com/managers/kevin-fitzgerald/]

You knew this will immediately follow, right?

You're welcome.

PS: Thank you for the tip. As always, superb and easy to follow. You know who you are 😘😘😘😘.

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved in our archive

I don't often share celebrity news, but with all the "cancelled for illness" and "collapsed from illness" headlines about musicians out there, it's really rare to see "Covid-19" displayed so prominently.

[theconcealedweapon]

Many businesses went out of business because of COVID.

Many people use this as evidence that the shutdowns and restrictions were the wrong choice, and that all businesses should have been allowed to operate at full capacity with no restrictions.

That wouldn't have worked, because businesses would still have had to close if too many customers chose to stay home or if all of their workers quit, went on strike, or got COVID.

But besides that, why would they go out of business from having to close for a few months? Why can't they just pause their operation for a few months then pick up where they left off when it's over? Closing means no profit, but it also means no operating costs.

Could it be because they still have bills that exist even if they're closed, like rent?

If that's the case, then the entire problem is that the profits of corporate landlords are being prioritized over everything else. If you're angry, direct your anger there.

Similarly, if you're angry about all the taxpayer money being spent on stimulus checks, there's another solution to that too. We could have just cancelled rent payments and postponed mortgage payments. That would have costed zero taxpayer money. But again, profits of banks and landlords were prioritized. While the working class lost their source of income, the owning class got to keep theirs.

[beardedmrbean]

https://x.com/allenanalysis/status/1940954093037453524?t=vp_o-m7TpmKwhomxSYTViw&s=19

Might have something to do with the fiscal year starting dates, they can't actually do that unless the democrats take back congress at the mid terms, if they don't they set a landmine for themselves to step on.

If that's what the idea really is, but hey it's not like that would be unheard of for either side to do.

Covid eviction moratorium was going to time out, president couldn't extend it because they lacked the authority and the courts told congress that they can do it, because it part of their job, and then we had members of the house out protesting the moratorium running out instead of actually doing their job and trying to get some legislation through that would actually extend that whole thing.

Remember when nancy said flat out that the president lacks the authority to forgive student debt because that was something that only congress has the authority to do and then they sat on student loan forgiveness dangling it in front of the voters faces through the midterm elections, which ended with them losing control of congress then biden still tried to do it and the ruling from the supreme court quoted nancy saying that the president doesn't have the authority to do that saying she was right?

The Supreme Court struck down President Joe Biden's student loan forgiveness plan on Friday, and its conservative justices used former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's words to do so.

Quoting Pelosi during a 2021 press conference, the Court's majority opinion wrote, "People think that the President of the United States has the power for debt forgiveness. He does not. He can postpone. He can delay. But he does not have that power. That has to be an act of Congress."

The justices agreed with six Republican-led states, while disagreeing with two individual borrowers, in a pair of lawsuits that challenged the Biden administration's student debt relief program. Although the Court ruled that the private plaintiffs lacked standing in their challenge against Biden's plan in the Department of Education v. Brown, the justices ruled against Biden in a 6-3 vote in Biden v. Nebraska, effectively shutting the program down. ______________________________________

____________________

I'm not sure how anyone could be shocked that politicians are acting in anything other than self interest the lions share of the time.

all of them, regardless of party or ideology

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for telling my extended family my mother has Covid

As I write this it’s December 17th, 2023. My (25) mother (62) has just tested positive for covid. Normally we (my sister, mother and I) go see my aunt, uncle (who is diabetic and immunocompromised), cousins (three of whom have chronic health issues), and my cousins children (ranging from 2-7 years old). However, my mother just tested positive for covid today.

I am of the opinion that we should postpone or cancel Christmas, because there are too many vulnerable people that we need to protect here.

My mother is of the opinion that she can isolate for at least 5 days (the government recommended amount in my country) before Christmas, so basically who cares, and telling them would be “over dramatic”

I have perviously caught covid from close contact with someone who isolated for 5 days, so I am extremely uncomfortable with this situation.

I want to at least tell my family that my mother has covid. They deserve to know, so they can make an informed decision on whether or not to take that risk, especially since they did that for us two years ago when one of my cousins had covid.

But knowing my mother she would think I’m TA.

I asked my sister and all she said was “your funeral”.

So tumblr, WIBTA

What are these acronyms?

[godlovesdykes]

covid for christmas 😡 we are so careful but my family in law doesn’t give a crap and so now the trip to visit relatives is postponed or maybe cancelled depending on if i test positive in the next few days. i need to go to the big city to get wedding dress fabric…

[itsnotablogsblog]

The Negative Effects of Being Off Socials to Noah “selling” his soul to fame

NOAH SEBASTIANS IMPACT ON BEING GONE OFF SOCIALS LEAD FANS ASTRAY TO WHAT BAD OMENS IS ACTUALLY ABOUT.

-the vicious cycle of Bad Omens negativity -

-The Mysterious Man who allegedly knows Noah-

Hi welcome back to another rant. We are discussing the issue and negative effects on how a person who is quite popular is impacting the fans, with not engaging.

So I’ve wanted to talk about this for awhile now, considering that Noah has been gone from social media back in December.

This is where State of the Scene Podcast took notice that Noah was no longer active on social media.

This is where fans are also being affected of him being gone from the internet as he wiped off his digital footprint.

Now we all know that Noah is highly highly private. Most of what we know we don’t know because of how private he is with his personal life.

In detail, from the interview from Loudwire, Noah didn’t exactly put a good description of detail to why he actually deleted socials.

A lot of people took it as a sign of him dealing with his mental health.

But to be fair the internet is just one place to dump but it never goes out further than what revolves around it. It can be a deep dead end, with no meaning behind it.

But what exactly are the side effects of being off social media whenever you’re a huge part of a fanbase that people want to enjoy? Let’s take a look at our first topic.

THE CYCLE OF NEGATIVE SETBACKS

So, in all when a celebrity decides to delete their social media, it’s taking away that experience with the fans. Leaving them alone and abandoned to what music and what type of content they decide to do.

This leaves with Noah Sebastian disappearing mid-December without fans knowing. It creates a divide with the fans, due to Noah being gone for a year now. This also raised a lot of questions on my end that I still don’t understand.

THE LOST CONNECTION TOWARDS ARTIST AND FAN

In my opinion, I think Noah did something completely dumb and stupid for deleting his socials. There seems to be a lot of disappointment for the fans when they want him back on social media. I think they’re right to express how they feel, even if Noah is gone, it makes the fans feel sort of left out to what the lead singer has to put out for the fans.

This gives them negative feedback on fans delegating that if they’re set out to be an exclusive merch store or if they really are a numetal band.

Plus it takes away all the interaction from the fans.

NOAH’S IMPACT ON BEING GONE

I think there’s going to be a lot of opinions and discussion to how I’m going to receive this information after posting this blog, but to me, that’s a lot more information for my ideas next blog.

So what is the impact Noah put on the fans that created this toxic atmosphere on social media?

Here are my theories

In terms, Noah created a twitch back in 2019, during Covid. This led him to postpone and cancel tour dates because of what’s been happening when they started quarantining everyone around the world.

There he met his best friend Keaton Pierce.

Allegedly i got told by a man, who claimed to be friends with both Keaton and Noah. His name I can’t remember.

After 2019, in the early year of 2020, he came out with the most listened album “THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND” right after he deleted his socials.

During his twitch streams with fans, a lot of it came from him engaging what the fans wanted to look forward to in their next album.

Noah on the receiving end, gave what the fans wanted in return.

But it seemed to not last long. Noah wanted to be part of the fanbase, to engage with fans, without the necessity of starting drama. So where did this all lead to the development of the toxic cycle of hate?

I’m not exactly sure where the toxic thing came from but from the tea blogs I have read came from one specific person. It’s honestly crazy to think that the toxic fanbase never goes away.

So what changed?

Noah’s presence online was in my opinion starting out just like any normal person on the internet. From his live twitch streams, playing with fans or people he met on discord.

To having his own discord server where fans all over the world can talk to Noah. Mind you this all happened in 2019.

They say he also had a tumblr account, but I couldn’t find it anywhere. That’s where I got stumped. He definitely deleted his account. But the original Bad Omens tumblr account still remains on here. Leaving it abandoned.

Noah’s trace seemed to be gone after Covid. Although he was pretty much active on Twitter all the time, a lot of fans loved interacting with his social presence being online.

It’s honestly pretty wild that I did not even know he existed during quarantining. All of this I have learned and met people that actually do know him and how he is as a person.

THEORY 1: Mental Health or Toxic Online Behavior?

This theory led me to think, that he probably got off socials because of how toxic the fanbase got.

Of course there’s the other reason as to his mental health declining. But since he seems to be doing fine as of now, he seems a lot happier being offline.

The fanbase can be toxic, and there’s a lot of people who get jealous and start acting like they want to pick on the person for being hateful or expressing their own opinions.

This has led a lot of fans start drama on the most dumbest things.

As for example their online merch store. A lot of it seems to come off there and start like a wildfire. From one person saying that their merch is AI, to another person saying that the Hentai shirt was p*rn*graphic. To Davis coming out and making a meme from all the hate it has given.

To a fan claiming that they humiliated. Like dudes. Chill the fuck out. You know how insensitive and childish that sounds? You guys are adults. It’s pretty annoying to see on the platform just because you don’t like something IN FACT Matt said something about this awhile back.

Here’s what he said.

“If you’re an old fan, don’t like the new material, then listen to the old content and shut the fuck up lol.”

I don’t think he was being rude. More to put it as a statement for others to understand that the band doesn’t owe anyone anything.

To those anons who think the band owes you something or say that the band knows you, it’s hard for me to understand if they actually know who you are.

This includes the circle where one of his ex-girlfriends decided to go public and start a tea blog of what Noah is like.

This led other anons follow up on what she had to say and what her relationship was like with Noah.

Obviously I don’t hate her, because I don’t know her personally.

The toxic online behavior looks like it’s all over the place. From what this man told me, he told me that several things of what he quote on quote said saying “if you think about it, Noah likes this perspective on music. More so to say that what he puts out in his music, he’s not just producing it. Whether in a sense, he likes and wants fans to enjoy.”

This man I tell you blew my mind. This is why I said allegedly. Whether or not he knows Noah, it’s sort of creeped me out by what I heard about Noah, that also confirms what’s been being said.

We do know Noah had a mental health issue leading him to delete socials which we all respect and appreciate while he gets better.

THEORY 2: THE MAN BEHIND THE MASK

Now this man, I tell you gave me goosebumps all over my body. From what I remember him telling me is that he sold his soul to gain momentum and gain popularity. He also said that Noah wasn’t looking for fame this quickly.

Of course, this made me think okay but if this was actually real, is it possible to sell or buy someone’s soul for their reputation in the sense to make them popular?

From what I heard, is that Noah did something very shady to get famous. Whether or not this is true, it’s pretty creepy and highly scary. This is from months ago when I first started knowing about Noah Sebastian.

Believe me being a fan and being to enjoy his music, to knowing the weird things that I got told. It feels like a gate to the unknown, more likely a gate to where people don’t talk about it much. It’s where you feel like you entered some type of illuminati shit.

The questions I asked him were mainly about how people go into the business in music. He stated that during his time knowing Noah due to gaming over the PC, he, Noah, and Keaton were talking about what makes music interesting.

Some of it I can’t talk about, because it gets really dark, really easily.

But due to the toxic environment of them having to deal with toxic people in the fanbase, Noah in a sense doesn’t like it. It makes their own fanbase look bad.

In terms of him being gone, a lot of new fans and a lot of the old fans that have followed them for years it seems like it’s causing the fanbase to know little about the band Bad Omens.

This is causing a whirlwind of people discontinuing to not liking their music.

The supportive fans will continue to support. While others don’t want to support the band.

How come no one is talking about this?

Well this leads to my next topic on the subject.

THE BAND NEEDS TO INTERACT WITH THE FANBASE

Many fans need interaction with the artist. Without that interaction, there’s a problem where the fans don’t know how the artist thinks. This leads to problems later on to fans coming up with rumors on how the band actually is like. To fans ranting out that they no longer want to be part of the fandom.

This is where it gets interesting, because I feel like Noah just quit social media because of how fans were taking everything too personally and too serious.

To where it leads the thought that Noah doesn’t want to do anything with the fanbase. Okay if he didn’t want to do anything with the fanbase, does that make him a bad person?

In other terms, as to what I have seen on his twitch streams, he enjoyed talking to people and enjoyed being able to talk to fans. Which led him to start his own discord, to him being on YouTube, to him having all these socials.

This is causing the fanbase to lose that interaction with Bad Omens.

The only interaction they have is Davis. He is the main spokesperson for Bad Omens when it comes to merch. Then there’s Matt. He interacts with people sometimes on the Twitter platform. Along side Folio, Jolly, and Ruffilo.

I think when it comes down to Noah Sebastian, I think he didn’t want to interact with fans anymore and that’s causing the main frenzy. Even though half of the band has socials, it’s pretty obvious that they have become highly private.

But there’s a bad side to it as well.

Even though the guys are very private about everything and little is known about what’s going on to their lives, I think it goes much farther than that.

A lot of the times, a band when it’s formed they need to have a fan interaction at some point in time. But with Noah not having socials, he’s distancing himself from that and it’s making him feel like every fan that follows Bad Omens is a bad person. Or fake fan that interacts in a bad way.

This is where I get confused, because without knowing what Bad Omens does as a band without the context of what they put on their merch site is in a sense a bit like saying “if they’re a band, why promote a clothing brand?”

CLOTHING BRAND OR MUSIC LABEL?

So with Bad Omens they promote an excellent merch collection. Differing from their old merch to the new merch for the death of peace of mind.

So what are they really? Are they both a music band? Or are they a clothing brand?

This is where some fans get highly angry. To where they’re getting bored with the same thing over and over. From Sumerian coming out with the same Concrete OST vinyl, but in different colors, to Bad Omens producing the old merch they had with their second album Finding God Before God Finds Me.

Like bringing back the most loved merch from their previous collection and releases.

This leads fans thinking that Bad Omens is just a clothing brand but doesn’t produce enough music.

I mean I get where they get this question and get mad at Bad Omens just because they want new music instead of the old content.

To be honest, from them starting a tour and then cancelling it due to Noah having a bad burnout, it really made a lot of fans upset. This leads to the other subject.

If someone goes off social media and deletes everything, that brings a lot of negative vibes to the fan base. Not just because of a mental health problem, but it also leaves the fans wondering why Noah left.

If you bring back the previous content I have blogged here, a lot of what I said revolved around Noah experiencing a bad fan base and how they appeared on his doorstep to pulling pranks on him.

Well let’s dig a bit deeper.

Since Noah is a very particular person when it comes to certain things. Like the fan base. He might have thought some point in time the toxic comeback that people have said, or thought about his career is full on bad.

Not just that, but the fact that during one of his livestreams on twitch, someone told him to “go ***”.

Okay. Thats sort of mean considering that this man just wanted to promote his album and his music for people to listen to. I think due to the hate he constantly had and received led him to delete his social media.

He sort of got bored with it in my opinion. Now that his band has become popular, a lot more fans are wondering the fact that maybe Noah shouldn’t have deleted everything.

THE CYCLE OF TOXICITY

The cycle of how we define toxic behavior online and what it does online, it can be a lot of topics from ranging from haters to fake fans to people causing rumors.

From what the man told me, Noah did not want to be in the spotlight of fame. He never really asked for it, but in time he did.

This comes from years and years of providing music, and publishing music vinyls. To tour dates even.

Listen I’ll tell you right now, there is a sacrifice that people do, in order to become successful. If Noah made a decision to stay off social media, then it takes away what the fans really want.

This leads to the theory that he sold his soul to or offered something in return for fame.

I’m not sure if you guys are familiar with the theory that there might be shady people in the industry where in California everything seems like you can afford something from doing something.

From what the man told me, Noah wanted sell out. He wanted the attention and the money. From his friendship with Keaton, they both wanted to succeed. Although im not quite sure why it has some part to do with the occult.

If there was some sort of cult in the music industry, then it’s a pretty big secret.

I know it’s crazy to think, but if Noah really sold his “soul” many people wouldn’t believe it. It comes down to how hard they work off and how much blue collar work they do. If Noah actually sold his soul for a contract to become big, it’s quite creepy to think, more so to where you completely abandon your own fanbase and just forget they even exist.

I mean that’s a pretty big ass move to even do. It actually upsets me because not only they’re a great band performing publicly, but they’re distancing themselves from the fans that actually support them. More likely Noah than the other guys in the band.

I think we need to show Noah that it’s not the entire fanbase that’s toxic. Some fans are nice, heck a lot of us enjoy his content.

The cycle where this comes in, I don’t think it’s ever going to stop. I mean you basically have people commenting and ranting that they don’t enjoy some of the songs they put in the albums they write.

Even if you ignore it, it never stops or goes away. I think Noah got sick of seeing people argue over the dumbest thing.

But anyways, yes he did leave because of mental health, but he also left due to the fanbase being toxic and that really takes away the fun that bands try to bring into the music world.

This created a toxic environment inside the bad omens community. Even if it comes from a specific group that always wants Bad Omens to fail as a band, it comes from everyone around.

Okay let’s face the fact here.

1. These tea blogs you read online, they only talk about Bad Omens either collaborating or touring around the world.

2. They actually don’t know Noah. All they say is hearsay.

3. They just talk about other people supporting different artists, and/or just bully them. If they actually knew Noah, I don’t think Noah wouldn’t like it.

Obviously I’m just a fan here, who experienced a lot and met people who actually know what Noah is like. I don’t know if I consider myself lucky, or just solely because I love this band.

But anyways moving on.

This missing interaction between Noah and the fans that came after him deleting socials, it says a lot about a person. Honestly if he didn’t delete socials and just stayed offline while he was working on his mental health, it could’ve been easier. Rather than deleting everything.

I think that fans should have this interaction with Noah, but I also feel like if Noah were to see the crap that people put on the internet, it’s nothing compared to what the fans want.

DID HE REALLY SELL HIS SOUL?

From what I heard, I’ll tell you I didn’t sleep that night. If Noah actually sold his soul to the devil, why does he reference the devil so much in Finding God Before God Finds Me?

Not to mention his four songs

DETHRONE

THE HELL I OVERCAME

GLASS HOUSES

WORST IN ME

In which he describes that the devil took his soul for the price he paid. In which terms he wanted to sell out tickets for the new album The Death Of Peace Of Mind.

He also references the devil in many ways. One where he took a picture with a goat. Or has a tattoo of a goat.

He also described how the occult takes something from you. Something meaningful.

From what I experienced I also met someone else, now I don’t know if they were legit crazy or just making up nonsense, but they told me to sell my soul to them.

I was like “no thankyou.”

Then comes to the fact that this other artist told me he was in a satanic cult group and that he worshipped satanism and how he was a satanist, stuff like that.

Listen, I’ll support bands that make really great music, but having the knowledge to know these things can be quite weird. Specially if someone is telling someone else that this whole music industry is based off of a cult.

I think you gotta look at the aspect of wanting to openly know about what famous people are like. I think I opened myself up to this a lot more than others, and made me make this blog. To finding out more on Noah.

Honestly, if a person has the ability to actually know this stuff and has the strength to go far and out and reach the tunnel of the unknown. Then that’s something.

But I think selling or offering your own services to devote a specific god more so the devil, I think it’s highly outrageous.

Believe me I had nightmares due to finding this stuff out for weeks. Weeks bro. I think I got a bit paranoid about it, so I had to take a major break from knowing all this stuff in the span of one year.

FANS THINK NOAH DOESN’T CARE

Okay if he was mean, that would mean that Noah definitely doesn’t like his fanbase. The only thing Noah doesn’t like is drama. He stays far away from it as much as possible.

Drama leads to all sorts of problems but the band doesn’t really care for much of it. They keep doing what they’re doing and have the best time selling merch and their albums.

While these fans (the anons) that says something.

These people include the inner circle that the public ex-girlfriend of Noah Sebastian has. To the inner circle of the anti omens fans who call themselves the dick riders.

Even if they’re famous for knowing who Noah is, I think they’re just wanting to want to know Noah, because he’s the most hottest person only being recently 29.

This leaves me with not interacting with anyone who just hates on people because they’re allowed to.

I feel like these types of people aren’t good or healthy friendships. The tumblr blogs they own, is solely just to leave a conversation of Bad Omens.

Listen if you had the time to know what I know from what I experienced, I think you’re just making up nonsense that isn’t even relevant.

That’s what I hate. That’s what I don’t interact with.

You definitely don’t know everything.

Also Noah isn’t mean. He’s just highly reserved.

MY CON-SENSES

If Noah made the right decision to leave socials, there’s got to be some kind of explanation.

Like I said, he is a particular man. I think he thinks differently than most people do.

But it leaves me with questions. If he likes his fans, why did he leave? Why didn’t he stay?

Why do people think that he’s not the nicest person around?

Why are fans always finding some way to disagree with merch?

Is Bad Omens doing something wrong?

If Noah came back on social media, it would be a surprise. I’m just highly upset that he deleted everything. Fans these days don’t have the ability to respect boundaries. Specially when it comes to parasocial interactions.

That’s also another reason. Noah leaving his fans and abandoning his social media makes everyone upset and not just me.

My only train of thought is that Noah made a dumbass move deleting everything that he had.

If he didn’t delete socials, then he would still be able to interact with people.

But I guess people ruin it for everyone.

If fans think Noah doesn’t care for his fans, then why is he putting out music for everyone to enjoy? If he didn’t care, he wouldn’t have started such a great band and career.

Honestly I think the problem is with the people who want Bad Omens to look bad.

Even with the Concrete OST. If you don’t like it, then don’t buy it. You’re the one making a problem here.

If you aren’t happy with the band then move on. The band doesn’t owe you shit. They’re out there producing to make money. That’s what they do.

Anyways I think that Noah leaving socials, and the fans acting mean towards each other. It is also distancing the fan from the artist.

Without having to know the artist, and what they like producing, people will think that they’re not being heard or being listened to publicly.

This happens often on Twitter.

Or the problem where they showed us the concrete ost vinyl. Where when they launched their merch, a lot of people complained that it was not available in Australia or overseas.

A lot of people asked Davis, but Davis on the other hand, didn’t really answer their commentary.

I just think that Noah should have been more involved with fans.

My only advice would’ve been that he could have at least put some boundary between his twitch streams and fans showing up at his house.

BOUNDARIES DIDN’T HELP

Okay so this is where my next question is. If he put out boundaries, to where he told fans to not show up at his home or anywhere he went, then why did the fans not respect the rules?

It seems like the fans caused this break and distance to where Noah got a bit concerned and creeped out by what has happened to him. I think the fans caused this more than anything.

They didn’t respect his privacy, they were always wanting to hang out with the dude, they wanted autographs, and wanted to come party with Noah considering the amounts of partying he did with his friends and just live streamed on Twitch.

He wanted to show fans what he loves and adores which is music. Being involved with friends and hanging out by the pool or playing games.

I’ll call these people

“THE CRAZED FANS”

These people that came out of the closet to go such lengths to interact with Noah was not okay. From him saying in his livestream that people were showing up on his doorstep, to him asking them to leave. It’s highly disturbing and disrespectful. He also mentioned that it wasn’t okay for them to do that.

He did of course tell them to leave.

I think this plays a huge part and factor to why Noah also left social media. He clearly doesn’t like stalkers. It feels to me he could have been a lot more careful about his actions and decisions.

Him being gone for a year isn’t bad. But my worry is that it’s going to become controversial because he’s been gone and hasn’t returned to social media.

I think there’s going to be a lot more drama on him and at him from fans that are wanting new music and wanting new albums being released rather than merch being sold.

There’s definitely going to be interesting discussions regarding him being gone in the next few months.

This is all becoming very recent. So there’s going to be more topics on it.

I feel like the next few weeks and the next year, right after tour, I think people are going to be bored from them announcing a lot of merch. It’s giving them the abandonment that they seek for an artist to do.

And since Noah isn’t being part of the fanbase anymore, that’s going to be an issue.

[ultraericthered]

2020 Memories: Digimon Adventure Last Evolution Kizuna

Back in late February of 2020, this movie got released into Japanese theaters, a movie that supposedly coincided with the earlier Digimon Adventure TRI film series and would conclude the story. Given how much TRI suuuuuucked, it was a worrying prospect. But unlike TRI, which was styled like an anime series, this would be just one movie. Hopefully much less offensive, or even good enough to salvage the story. It had a better writer attached to the script, and it even had Hiroyuki Kakudō on board as a director this time! Surely, this was going to be a worthy compensation for what we endured i....huh? Kakudō walked away from the project? Something about the premise being a "violation" and "betrayal" of the original canon? Oh NO....

Yeah, the movie turned out to be ass. Over focus on Tai and Matt and their Digimon, the 02 DigiDestined still getting the shaft (though we at least got to see them this time!), absolutely no follow-up to the dangling threads of TRI and in fact there's a straight contradiction to TRI in there (How is Meicoomon back???), some egregriously out-of-character behavior from some characters (SORA), cheap emotional manipulation to cover up for lack of substantial story and character ideas, and the worst part of all that had Kakudō turned off being this absolutely out of thin air bullshit Narnia rule imposed on being a Chosen Child where once you're no longer a child, you can no longer have a Digimon partner and have anything more to do with Digimon and the Digital World. Which is used to justify a separation ending that flies in the face of how Adventure 02 ended, as well as drive the motivations of the main antagonist in a completely ridiculous way (what good even is this rule if it can fucking cheat like that???) All because pretentious director Tomohisa Taguchi wanted to force a message upon both the characters and the audience that they need to grow up and leave that childish Digimon nonsense behind for good (despite the fact that all of TRI was basically about pandering to adult fans who loved Digimon Adventure in their childhoods and hadn't outgrown it!), so he wanted to Torch the Franchise and Run.

Karma hit this thing hard, though. It majorly underperformed in theaters due to the COVID-19 pandemic hitting and causing it to be pulled out early, the scheduled US theatrical release for March had to be postponed, eventually cancelled altogether so that the film and its English dub would have to be released in July, only for that to be delayed so that it ended up finally getting released in Fall. To top it all off, the director's intentions went unrealized. A far better follow-up film, Digimon Adventure 02: The Beginning, came out in 2023, which did away with the bullshit aging rule and actually got Kakudō back on board for an upcoming PV featuring adult Tai and Matt with their Digimon. So when all's said and done, this film was one big nothing.

^ Sora Takenouchi watching as Last Evolution Kizuna flops. Sweet Vindication.

[godisarepublican]

They hit the kill-switch! Get ready for a cancelled election!

Biden was given "Covid" and a mysterious "Computer Glitch" has magicked inside of the financial networks... all in time for the election!

Is there ANYTHING the self imposed elite won't stoop to in their lust for power?

It's four years. Just thinking about how woefully inadequate that is, given how much reform we need. All it does is postpones the evil from the globalists for four years -- FOUR YEARS! -- and they'd STILL rather burn down everything than wait for Trump's retirement.

[siflshonen]

About a month ago, the first original musical produced at my place of employment since the pandemic closed after a successful run, including a full week’s extension since it performed so well.

This is amazing, especially considering that over half the cast, creative, and technical teams contracted COVID-19 half a week before opening.

Should we have continued with the original opening night instead of holding for one more day? I sure don’t think so, but we did it anyway. Was the cast ready and fully recovered by opening night? Well, they weren’t contagious, but two of them still felt like death warmed over when curtain rose and went home immediately after it fell. Was the show really ready and polished by opening night?

No. No, it was not. The performance itself was strong enough to still be fun and engaging and it was still overall high-quality, but it was definitely not final product-quality.

It did not help that the stage manager fell ill two days before as the cast were recovering, so the final preview and opening weekend required the technical manager to learn and run the lights and sound cues in about 12 hours. He was also in the throes of reconfiguring the microphones and speakers feeding into the board, so the quality of the sound was wildly inconsistent. Since all the previews were cancelled on account of the cast falling ill, I had to reschedule all photography to fall on opening night rather than gathering it and some professional videography in advance and for promotional material and trailer generation to be ready come opening night. The photographer and cast were forced to have their individual character photos taken in the set under work lights during the mic check, and the technical manager was desperately trying to spin all the plates for final completion at the same time. It was a total clusterfuck. The photographer was frustrated that nothing was ready, the lights could not be adjusted (we had neither the time nor the manpower) and everyone was talking over one another, but she calmed down some once I explained, in no uncertain terms, that not even the set was completely ready the day prior, and the performers definitely were not, either.

The mics were nothing short of terrible on opening night, and I was grateful for my decision to have postponed the videography until the next week. As it turned out, when the technical manager reviewed the still-camera footage of the show that the theatre takes for archival purposes, the sound hadn’t even recorded at all because the board was not set up correctly. Since the videographer would have been plugging into the board for sound, this would have been a huge problem.

While the cast’s illness was not a secret, we did not advertise this to patrons mostly because management didn’t want the public perception of the theatre to be a hotbed of sickness. COVID-19 is still a bogeyman in theatre as much as hospitality and service, so it was interesting to hear the conflicting viewpoints of, “we should explain the cast got sick so they don’t think it was an issue on the theatre’s end” and “nobody will come if they think they’ll all get sick!” enter the discussion at the same time.

However, the big picture is never easy to communicate to the public: the musical cast was comprised entirely of outside actors, not the theatre’s stable ensemble or admin staff, and their rehearsals were isolated to the upper floor main stage of the theatre after hours and away from the main floor nightly shows. The only person interacting with them on a regular basis were the technical manager and production manager, and nobody had seen them for two weeks because they had been holed upstairs working on the set when it wasn’t being rehearsed upon. The risk of their show-specific sickness breaching containment didn’t exist. Actually, I was the only other staff member at risk because I’d be in the back of several rehearsals filming phone video to use for social media in lieu of any other proof of concept - but I stopped once tech week began and half the cast was in costume while the rest waited for theirs to be finished.

(“Ugh. That video is so unpolished, and it’s just a rehearsal! You don’t even have clean audio from the board. I can’t believe you showed that to the world,” an outside contractor told me during a consulting meeting. “You’ve got to get better video and audio equipment.”

“Well,” I said, “the director was fine with it, and video I can capture, edit, and turn around quickly without using a lot of RAM on my work laptop is better than nothing at all. I’m not a film crew, and I’m not using the marketing budget for that at this stage of the production.”

After the debacle with the professional preview videography having to cancel due to the cast’s sickness, my boss began to see it my way. The backup videography team I contacted in the event opening night video was mandatory also gave us a quote of $2,500+, and that was with a nonprofit discount. Yeah, no.)

One of the worst things marketing can do is get messaging out to the public only to have to turn around and contradict it—especially in a short period of time—so I quietly ignored any instruction to maintain continued blatant advertising of opening night on the promised week until the final call on the show’s status became clear. (My bosses didn’t notice; they don’t exactly look closely at the shit I post on social media or take the time to understand why my marketing plans are set up the way they are. I don’t blame them, either. It’s too much information and they had bigger fish to fry.)

It didn’t matter. The musical’s opening weekend was packed, and because the show was highly conventional, the city’s equivalent of the Tony’s took notice and started sending judges to see the show and evaluate it. This is great for PR, but it also means that a theatre must give away a lot of free tickets to accommodate the slush judges. Like, more than it bargained for. It’s common for theaters to give out free tickets to promote a show, but this went above and beyond.

But what was anyone gonna say? No?! No to free acclaim and critical review?!

“Critical review”, I say. The local Tony judges for round one of qualification are really just every Tom, Dick, and Harry off the street attending on behalf of the organization and willing to report whether they liked the show or not. Usually, the panel is full of, um, older people, and my employer’s shows are not often, well…

They’re usually R-rated and highly alternative. These are polarizing things to be, and so the local Tony’s usually hate my employer, and my employer resents them. This show, which was kind of like a musical, bayou-y-er, only slightly edgier version of Clue, was the exception.

In truth, the musical is cute. That’s the word: cute. It’s not groundbreaking and it’s not deep, but it is charmingly cute and happy to be exactly what it is. The songs are catchy, which is good, especially considering its creators are a viral tiktok musical artist known for songs about dogs—whom I will call Gumbo—and one of the theatre’s most prolific creator-improvisers—whom I will call Cheddar—and the premise relies on just about every murder mystery trope there is.

(When it was time to begin promoting the show—after both Cheddar and Gumbo had ghosted me when they said they’d supply me with promotional assets like demo tracks or brainstorming sessions for the previous six months—Gumbo came to me to discuss what he’d brainstormed doing for social media in service of promoting his show, and how he thought he could use his existing platform to best support that. The usual strategy meeting shit.

“Well,” I said, losing my patience once he finished, “if you wanna do it so bad, where’s the content?! I’ve already started promoting it!”

I’d actually go out of my way pretty significantly for Gumbo, mind you. Gumbo is a genius of hard work more than anything else, and he runs himself ragged on his projects. They’re polished, sometimes to the point of their own sanitized detriment—comes with the territory of tiktokkin’ it. Cheddar, meanwhile, is a dyed-in-the-wool impulsive procrastinator. Their creative processes could not be more different.)

Anyway, the people showed up. And no sooner had I gotten the collateral to propel the rest of the run together did my bosses make the executive decision to extend the run. Which meant I had to redo it all. And meant I had to redo the collateral for the upcoming shows, because their runs had just been reduced by one week.

“If you authorize me to start advertising a show using outside ad placements—paid placements; printed placements—only to radically change the dates like that again,” I told one of my bosses, “I think I might just kill you.”

He grinned, which is how I know he’s just going to do it again. Probably, like, next week.

[exitrowiron]

The Death of My Mother

After a years-long courageous battle with breast cancer, my mother died on October 11, 2023 with my sister Lori and I holding her hands and my wife Beth by her side. She was 83 years old. 

Over 20 years ago a cancerous lump was discovered and removed, followed by radiation. All seemed well for over a decade as she and my dad enjoyed a very active retirement. A few years ago, the cancer was detected again and the mastectomy came too late to contain it.  

She endured years of chemotherapy, proceeding to a new drug therapy as soon as old one ended. Despite the unexpected death of my father nearly two years ago, she doggedly continued her treatment. Because she’d been athletic all her life, she tolerated more chemotherapy than her oncologist could remember giving anyone else. It wasn’t enough. 

She was determined not to let her life be dominated by her cancer; she continued to travel, paint, sew and entertain friends. She was assisted by my sister and uncle, both of whom lived in the same town as her; making sure she was safe and accompanying her to doctor visits, chemo treatments, etc.  

Despite the rigors of chemotherapy, you’d not have suspected her condition if you saw her in the grocery store. She lost weight, but with her wig and bubbly personality, she looked well, better in fact than most of her peers. She often went to the gym immediately after receiving an infusion, knowing she’d be too weak to do so in a day or two. Ultimately the breast cancer continued to spread, causing fluid to gather around a lung and ultimately metastasizing into a painful, inflamed cancer on her skin. 

In August she was struggling with the latest chemotherapy, having to suspend/postpone rounds until her anemia and overall strength could improve. The regimen was simply too taxing, and she was considering stopping treatment, despite the consequences of this decision. Then she had her first fall. In the middle of the night on the way back to her bed from the bathroom, she lost her balance and fell, cutting a large gash in her nose on the way to floor. She made it back to her bed and waited a few hours before finally calling my sister for assistance. She wasn’t wearing the Apple Watch we’d purchased for her explicitly for this purpose after my father’s death. 

The fall was unnerving for her (and all of us), but my sister installed motion-detector night lights and we reminded her to wear her Apple Watch. Despite the fall, she did well living independently, continuing to drive, etc. I offered to visit and spend a few nights with her, but my son’s wedding was approaching and she declined my offer. She did, however, remind me of her wish to never go to a nursing home; she had sufficient savings to afford in-home care when the time came. 

Although she didn’t resume treatment after the fall, her condition stabilized and she seemed to be gathering strength. Even the fluid around her lung, which had caused a troublesome cough and required drainage every so often was improving. Reluctant to make any concessions to her illness, she was forced to cancel the cruise she’d planned to take with Beth, me and a friend after Brady’s wedding.  

When our son Brady contracted Covid a week before his wedding, she wisely decided not to attend the wedding as well. The trip from Indiana to Maine would have been too difficult even with my sister’s help, and the risk of Covid gave her an acceptable excuse to cancel. 

In the early morning hours of September 13, however, Mom felt very dizzy and generally unwell so she reached out to neighbors for help (Lori was out of town). An ambulance was called and she was taken to the hospital where she was diagnosed with A-Fib and extreme covid. (A-Fib is one of the symptoms of the new Covid variant). Again, she wasn’t wearing her Apple Watch. We were sad that Mom had been infected with Covid, but relieved that she’d not gotten it from attending Brady’s wedding.  (Actually, no one got sick from Brady’s wedding.) 

Her blood work in the hospital was terrible, but again she rallied (with the help of Prednisone) and she was much improved by the time I took her home on Sunday, just 5 days after she was admitted. I stayed at the house and helped her for two weeks. During this time, she was weak but still able to care for herself with some assistance from me (preparing meals, cleaning the house, laundry, driving, etc.). She was well enough to resume her lifelong habit of creating a daily to-do list each morning on a yellow legal pad. Visits to her doctor (including a CT scan with contrast) gave her hope. She was diagnosed with pericarditis (fluid around the heart) as a result of Covid, but cancer activity was nominal. The cancer was still present but it wasn’t aggressively spreading. She was given hopeful instructions to concentrate on recovering from Covid.  

Her list of medications continued to grow in number and dosing complexity.  I made a spreadsheet to keep it straight. Xanax was added to the mix to help ease her growing anxiety. In the middle of the night, she would wake in fear that she was having trouble breathing (but her blood O2 was still good). All this was manageable, but she wasn’t eating so she continued to lose weight and when the prednisone course ended, she began to get weaker. 

I can’t cook but I did my best to prepare or purchase simple comfort food. No matter how absent her appetite she could always to be tempted into eating a Wendy’s frosty or DQ milkshake. She spent more and more time each day sleeping, in between bouts of fretting over how much she was sleeping. Ever the athlete, she insisted on walking laps inside the house and down the street in an effort to exercise herself to good health. She simply refused to accept this decline as inevitable and irreversible. Finally, one of her trusted doctors had to advise her to concentrate on rest and postpone the training sessions for a few weeks. 

Just a few weeks earlier, Holley, her beloved sister-in-law had a large tumor removed from her colon and was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer.  Holley’s condition had worsened quickly and as a result Mom's brother, a retired orthopedic surgeon, was understandably preoccupied with his wife’s condition. Holley was admitted to a hospital and rallied briefly before going to hospice. Holley passed away after just a few days in hospice but with my help Mom was able to visit her three times. 

I’d been in Evansville for two weeks when Holley died; this was a week longer than I’d expected and I’d run out of contacts lenses and didn’t have appropriate clothing for my aunt’s funeral.  Meanwhile, Mom continued to weaken, sleeping more and eating still less. She needed a caregiver in the house 24x7 so my sister and I began contacting agencies and secured caregivers before my departure. 

I was at our home in Washington for just 2 days before returning with Beth and clothes for Holley’s funeral and the expectation that we would be back home in a week. We flew into St. Louis and rented a car to drive to Evansville, planning to attend the funeral and then return to St. Louis to spend time with her parents for a few days before departing. With the in-home caregiver situation largely resolved for Mom, I assumed her condition would stabilize for a while. 

Beth and I had a hotel, but all that week I was at the house with Mom during the day before leaving when the nighttime caregiver arrived. Holley’s funeral was on Tuesday but Mom was too weak to attend.  That same day she requested a walker. There was no doubt she needed one, but her requesting it was a psychological concession on her part. We secured the walker that day and that night she insisted that I help her walk three laps inside the house, “to help her get better”. 

On Wednesday, a home oxygen concentrator was delivered. The oxygen machine was mostly for psychological support – knowing it was there if she needed it (and she rarely needed it). By this time it was obvious that Mom’s condition wasn’t going to plateau and that despite her preference, she needed care in a professional healthcare setting.  I’d broached this subject with Mom earlier in the week and she’d resisted. Through tears she said, “Going to someplace like that is a slippery slope and I don’t want to get on the slippery slope.” She still refused to acknowledge the inevitability of her situation. I gently responded, “Mom, you’re on the slippery slope. I’m concerned that if you stay in the house, something might happen, you could fall for instance, and we wouldn’t be able to get you up and you won’t be able to recover.” 

Evansville is a relatively small city and staffing 24X7 caregivers couldn’t be done with a single agency.  My sister cobbled together a network of caregivers that friends in similar situations had used but Mom’s needs were increasing beyond even this network. I reminded Mom that we’d spend any amount of money to keep her in her house, but we were running into limitations we couldn’t overcome. 

Her brother set aside his grief over the death of this own wife and visited Mom on Wednesday. At our request he encouraged her to go to Primrose. Primrose is an assisted living facility which their friends had used and it had a good reputation. Mom reluctantly agreed to go. Lori and I had toured Primrose that day and provided a deposit in the hope we could secure a room immediately, pending their evaluation of Mom’s needs. Even if accepted at Primrose, however, we would still need to provide 24x7 caregivers to be in Mom’s room at all times. In deference to Mom however, we pursued this option rather than a skilled nursing facility.  

By Thursday we’d secured a wheelchair as she could no longer use the walker safely.  She was sleeping practically all day, eating almost nothing, and required assistance to stand.  

By Friday she couldn’t get out of chair or stand on her own. I had to do most of the work with a lifting strap. Unfortunately, the Primrose evaluation was scheduled for the following Tuesday. Beth and I were supposed to drive to St. Louis to return the rental car before flying home on Saturday, but it was obvious I couldn’t leave. I borrowed a car from my sister, followed Beth to St. Louis to return the rental car before driving back to Evansville on Saturday. 

When we returned on Saturday Mom had declined still further, awake but too weak to talk or open her eyes or eat or toilet. It was clear that Mom needed to go to hospice, the same hospice used by her sister-in-law just a week earlier.  We let her sleep that afternoon and when the ambulance arrived around 5, I had to wake her and tell her that we were taking her to Deaconess. This was intentionally misleading but accurate. Deaconess is the health system that runs the hospital she’d used as well as the hospice. I said we need to go to Deaconess because she needed more care than we could provide in order for her to get better. She resisted by saying, “But why, I’m just sleeping?” This was a difficult conversation, but I was insistent and patient and eventually she allowed me to lift her out of her chair, help her onto the gurney and ride with her in the ambulance to the hospice center. 

Fortunately, Mom was too weak to open her eyes so she didn’t realize she was being wheeled into the hospice center, into a room identical to Holley’s (the suite next door actually). It was clear that we couldn’t have waited any longer to move Mom to hospice. She immediately required a catheter and her bladder had obviously been full and uncomfortable.  

The Linda White hospice center is a beautiful new facility attached to a Deaconess hospital. Each suite has a large sitting area for family/guests and an attached bedroom with two twin beds. The hospice administers medication, moves and toilets the patient but other than that they only come when alerted with a call button.  Mom was frequently conscious but rarely opened her eyes and couldn’t use the call button. Lori, Beth or I were with Mom from 8 am to 11 pm each day and then one of our outside caregivers stayed with Mom overnight.  

The first evening was difficult. Weeks of opioid painkillers left her painfully constipated. She refused to use a bedpan so I lifted her onto a bedside chair/toilet. This was unsuccessful so we returned her to bed, the nurse administered a suppository and an hour later we repeated the process, this time with some success. I’ve never provided such hands-on care to an adult. It was humbling for everyone. My mom was such a proud woman, always careful in her appearance and to see her stripped of all of this, practically naked and utterly helpless as I lifted her off the bed was sobering. I only cared for my mother for a few days/weeks and always had lots of paid assistance as well as the help of my sister – I can’t begin to imagine the strength and patience of those who care for their parents full time for an extended period. 

On Sunday, the swelling of my Mom’s feet which had begun a few days earlier grew much worse. The nurse informed us that this was significant a development and indicated that Mom was experiencing congestive heart failure. Mom remained marginally responsive though with her eyes closed and she was able to minimally engage with the friends who came to visit her. 

Mom continued to generally deny the reality of her situation and in order to avoid upsetting her, we placed this message on the door to her suite: 

Mom did make one concession to her condition, however, she asked to be visited by her parish priest. We left the room when he visited to pray, hear her confession, and deliver the last rites. 

By Monday morning Mom was barely able to swallow her oral medications and we accepted the nurse’s recommendation to begin administering comfort medication (morphine, etc.) intravenously using the port which had been previously used for chemotherapy. 

Mom’s condition continued to deteriorate; she stopped eating completely and drank very little. Answers to yes or no questions were difficult. Monday and Tuesday were spent in quiet vigil, interrupted only by the occasional visitor. Mom couldn’t respond but was likely conscious at least occasionally. In what I believed was a moment of lucidity, I told her I loved her and that she’d been a great mom and done well with her life. This would have a been a good conversation to have a few weeks ago or even a few days ago, but she was never willing to accept her impending death. I took occasional breaks to get a meal or workout, confident that my sister would alert me of any changes. As Mom continued to sleep, I started and completed her obituary as well as the slide show to be shown during the visitation at the funeral home.  

Lori and I chose to spend the night with her Tuesday night, sleeping in shifts. I was surprised she was still with us on Wednesday morning when Beth arrived and thought (feared) she might linger in this condition for a few days. Beth and I had just left her room on our way to the hotel to shower and change clothes when we heard the tech nurse call urgently. We quickly returned to Mom’s room and the charge nurse informed us, “It is happening now.” Lori had also stepped out of the room briefly and Beth went to retrieve her. It was obvious that Mom was dying at that moment and that she somehow timed it for the only moment in the past 48 hours in which both Lori and I had been out of the room.  Lori and I each held one of Mom’s hands. We could see that she’d stopped breathing, but I could still feel Mom’s pulse in her hand. Lori and I spoke to Mom, telling her we loved her, reassuring her that her family was fine and congratulating her on a life well lived. Her pulse continued for 30 seconds until it weakened and stopped. The color had drained from her face and she was gone. 

After a few more minutes of farewells and hugs amongst ourselves, we tidied the room and left with the pictures, flowers, and mementos we’d brought in an effort to make her comfortable. We headed to my sister’s home where I poured myself a large whiskey and offered the first of many toasts I will make to the memory of my wonderful mother.  

I left home as a freshman in college and except for the summer break before my sophomore year, never again lived at home (or in the same city as my parents) for more than a few days. Married at 23, Beth and I lived in St. Louis, Dallas, Minneapolis, Bellevue and now a small town in the Cascades in Washington state. My mom always hoped we’d move to Evansville and occasionally I felt guilty for not spending more time with my parents, but it was best for me personally and professionally as well as my marriage that we never lived closer than a few hours away and usually much further than that.  

Despite this long physical absence (or perhaps because of it), we were always on good terms and avoided much of the drama that can ensnare parent/adult child relationships. I’m at peace knowing that when my mom needed support and a caregiver, I stepped up and fulfilled my obligation. I did the right thing and have no regrets. 

[australianartistsdaily]

The fall of Australia's festival scene and what can be done to stop it.

When was the last time that you considered a sector that brings $5.7B AUD in a single year (2023) into a country's economy a sector that was at risk? Never? That seems like a logical answer. And yet, that is exactly what the case has been for the Australian festival scene over the last few years.

Over the last twelve months alone, the Australian Broadcasting Corporation has released over thirty stories regarding the declining state of Australia's festival scene. A large majority of these stories surrounded the indefinite cancellations of over a dozen festivals; many of which were the biggest in the country annually. I am currently writing this during the final ever Bluesfest; arguably Australia's most well known festival of all time. Much like other big (and smaller) named festivals including Groovin The Moo and Splendor In The Grass, Bluesfest has unwillingly closed its doors metaphorically due to the cost-of-living crisis. Similarly, in their statement of cancellation, Good Life festival stated that rising costs had also caused their end:

"Our mission has always been to provide an affordable, drug- and alcohol-free event where young people can safely immerse themselves in live music and entertainment, fostering real connections in an increasingly digital world." They said.

Unfortunately, this struggle has become commonplace. A report conducted by Creative Australia last year noted that forty four percent of Australian festivals were not profitable over 2022 and 2023. In exploring why, it is clear that increasing ticket prices caused by increasing costs of artists, insurance (driven in large part by environmental factors including climate change) and policing were leading factors in reduced ticket sales. Multiple venue operators have noted that the costs of public liability insurance alone has quadrupled since the lifting of restrictions “post” Covid-19 and overall costs of thirty to forty percent. Additionally, many artists have begun requiring their full fee upfront. Though this may seem selfish or extreme to some, now is a good time for the reminder that a study conducted in 2024 found that only fourteen percent of Australian musicians make Australia's minimum wage or more from all of their music endeavours and twenty four percent make $500AUD or less. These costs are also impacting international musicians and their ability to tour here; whether that be for their own tours or festivals. In an email to her fans in 2022, Aotearoan singer Lorde stated the following;

“To freight a stage set across the world can cost up to three times the pre-pandemic price right now. I don’t know shit about money, but I know enough to understand that no industry has a profit margin that high. Ticket prices would have to increase to start accommodating even a little of this, but absolutely no one wants to charge their harried and extremely-compassionate-and-flexible audience any more fucking money. Nearly every tour has been besieged with cancellations and postponements and promises and letdowns, and audiences have shown such understanding and such faith, that between that and the post-COVID wariness about getting out there at all, scaring people away by charging the true cost ain’t an option … I’m lucky. But for pretty much every artist selling less tickets than I am, touring has become a demented struggle to break even or face debt. For some, touring is completely out of the question, even if they were to sell the whole thing out! … I wanted to put all of this in your minds to illustrate that nothing’s simple when it comes to touring at the moment, and if your faves are confusing you with their erratic moves, some of this could be playing a part.”

This rise in these costs have led to Australia's festival scenes being unable to afford many international stars that would often to higher ticket sales. It has also created an environment where, instead of coinciding with them, Australian festivals are now in direct competition with performances from international musicians. And though Australia is often lumped in with the United States of America and England as countries that always have international musicians touring here, that is not fully true. As just a few examples, despite having dominated our charts for close to their whole careers, the week that I am writing this, the sale for Lady Gaga's first Australian tour in eleven years happened and Beyonce has not come in twelve years and has no Australian dates announced for her Cowboy Carter tour either at this stage. Australia is also often the last stop that international artists come to and as such are the most likely shows to be cancelled. So while I acknowledge that we are very lucky and privileged to have what we have in comparisons to other countries, all of the above factors do not bode well for our music scene as a whole.

This storm of circumstances has also changed the way those aged eighteen to twenty four approach touring. In decades past, this age group was known as the target age group for all music events. But between being hit hardest by Covid and the current cost-of-living crisis, festivals are finding that that is no longer the case. Instead, it has been noted that not only are people of this age group going out less in general “post” Covid, but those who do attend live music events are choosing to save up and spend more for international acts' solo concerts as they see it as better value for money. This is particularly the case given travel costs. It is also speculated that many of them see international acts as a “safer” bet given how many festivals have been cancelled, especially within the week that they were meant to happen.

Australian musicians have acknowledged this change, with many pleading Australians to support our local industry. When questioned, Australian artist Tones and I noted the further implications of the fall of the Australian festival industry;

“I think that it’s important now more than ever to buy tickets to your favourite bands, go to live shows, go to festivals, even if you just love the atmosphere, because these guys aren’t coming back. Some of these festivals can’t and they need that support … I understand that everyone gets so excited when overseas artists come over, and that’s really exciting, but soon we’re really not gonna have any festivals left, which is not only gonna deter overseas acts from coming over, but it’s really gonna hinder the up and coming Australian live music scene”

Many have also noted further impacts on the economy as a whole. As previously mentioned, in 2023 alone, the Australian festival scene brought $5.7B AUD into the Australian economy. Many adjacent businesses including hospitality and accommodation venues noted that, especially in small towns, the population doubled or more during the periods of festivals. Politically, Greens senator Sarah Hanson-Young also had the following to say on the matter;

“Arts and music is such an important part of what makes life great. It also is an important part of our economy … Thousand of people because of today’s decision to cancel Splendour In The Grass will be out of work. Thousands of people will be scratching around thinking how they’re going to pay their bills as artists who are involved in this festival, or hospitality workers who keep the festival going … The festivals and the musicians were these for us during the bushfires, they were there during the floods, they copped the brunt during Covid, and it’s time we gave them a hand now.”

But what does 'a hand' look like? Is it legislative change? Is it money? Should that money be going to the artists, venues, festival holders or customers? Well as you can imagine, it is all of the above.

Earlier this year, Australia held a parliament inquiry into the live music sector within the country. As part of its recommendations, a mixture of abolition of policing costs and tax offsets for festival runners plus vouchers for eighteen to twenty four year festival goers (in line with many countries throughout Europe) was suggested.

It was also noted that festivals within the Northern Territory have continued to do well due in large part to having substantial state government funding. Though the New South Wales state government offered a two year emergency funding amount to certain festivals, in speaking to media about Bluesfest, the event's founder and executive chairman Peter Nobel noted that it was not enough;

"We're not looking for a handout, we're looking for a hand up as our industry grapples with the cost-of-living crisis and other challenges." He said.

Another floating around include having a small levy for concertgoers seeing international artists that would go back into the Australian industry. This would be the equivalent of a few dollars maximum and put Australia in line with the United Kingdom that has a similar scheme.

Likewise, Australian artists have called for international musicians to have Australian openers for their shows. When interviewed, Australian band Angus and Julia Stone asked for international artists including Taylor Swift to have Australian openers while in Australia. Before the Swifties jump me for mentioning her name, I will note that I am aware that with the exception of Eras (where Sabrina Carpenter was our opener), every single Australian tour Taylor has done from her RED tour (2013) to now either had an Australian (Guy Sebastian for RED, Vance Joy for 1989) or an Aotearoan (Broods for Reputation) opener for her, with Vance Joy being her opener for nearly every single show of her 1989 tour internationally too. To add to this call, the Association of Artist Managers have voiced a wish for either the promoters or government to create and enforce “Michael's Rule”. In short, this rule/law would make it mandatory for all international musicians to have an Australian opener at their Australian shows.

Though this change is necessary, there is some hope for festivals though. Tour manger Jimmy Foster still believes that despite younger generations leaning towards international tours with bigger productions, there is a future for more “exclusive”, intimate and unique experiences. This success has been seen in the rise of attendance of council and local based music events and festivals such as the Meredith Music festival. When questioned about their success, researchers, event holders and concertgoers noted that the low to no cost of council and local events and the diversity and freedom to bring your own drinks and food to the Meredith Music festival played a large role. This further shows the need and impact of government financial support both to the events and concertgoers.

While many may believe that music is not a necessity, the risk of losing our festival scene could be irreparable. I have already spoken about the clear cut economic loses both directly and indirectly, but it goes beyond that. When interviewed about the current environment of the Australian music industry, researcher Diana Tolmie had the following to say;

“My very recent research data also acknowledges that increasingly, musicians are exiting the profession owing to unsustainable financial and workplace experiences. This age group is becoming exponentially younger, and is two-thirds female”

Additionally, a thriving live music scene has been shown to be good for mental and physical health. Of course this is the case for artists and their crews, but is also true for the everyday person attending these events. Taking this a step further, places like Kununurra (a town with one of the highest domestic violence rates in the country) have incorporated family festivals to attempt to lower domestic violence by having it be alcohol-free and create positive social environments.

Though music will always exist, if we lose our music scene, much of this will be lost and we will be worse off for it. Government funded money and legislative change are only two of the aspects of saving the industry, but they are two essential ones. So, in the wake of the federal election in a fortnight, even if you yourself cannot attend the festivals and concerts of Australian artists, I implore you to call, write or otherwise contact your local representative and tell them that this is a priority for you. Because without change today, there may not be an Australian music industry to save tomorrow.

[chongmiz]

I heard I can fo it with a broken heart on the radio

And aside from the chorus being kinda awkward (I'm so depressed I act like it my birTHHHdaayyyyyYY)

I think this whole 'i sold you a lie you think I'm doing well but I'm not but I'm killing it so I'm a #girlboss try come for my job' is so embarassing

Because everything shes done over this last year I've thought 'theres a woman doing real bad'

Like I'm not trying to dispute the effort and energy that goes into touring like she does, but a lot of her decisions both professional and personally have made me think uh oh

Its giving 'could a depressed person do this?' But it's about dating the worst men on the planet and looking like shes going to cry on stage half the time

💌 come talk to me, a veteran swiftie in the anti- tag in the same way that martin luther still thought himself catholic

where i land with it lyrically is in conversation with four songs: "mirrorball" from folklore, "nothing new" from red TV, and two other ttpd tracks, "who's afraid of little old me" and "clara bow"

per the long pond sessions, she wrote "mirrorball" partially about COVID's effect on touring ("and they called off the circus, burned the disco down / when they sent home the horses and the rodeo clowns"). pair that with the much discussed WAOLOM asylum line and... it might be because she says "circus," it might be that while i have no personal experience of involuntary hospitalization i Do have basic empathy, but i think of the two great blond celebrity memoirs of the last few years: britney spears' the woman in me and jeannette mccurdy's i'm glad my mom died. which is all to say, she doesn't Have to do it with a broken heart! actually! "the asylum where they raised me" sounds like her pursuit of fame was coerced by say, a stage mom or an abusive contract or monetary need (it wasn't), if she was in an urgent health crisis like ICDIWABH suggests ("even when you wanna die"), she has all the power to postpone or cancel dates. she's not in a conservatorship, she's not being Made to tour; i can imagine feeling obligated to pay the hundreds of people it employs, but she is an actual billionaire, i think she can afford blue cross blue shield PPO plans for a militia. you can interpret "all the pieces of me shattered while the crowd was chanting 'more!'" as resenting the audience, but there's other performers in smaller venues with less freedom and power who need to be onstage to afford food. idk.

then there's the "try and come for my job:" extremely vague as to who is coming for it, and the popular reading is of other pop stars on tour. "clara bow" is my favorite track on ttpd by a long shot in part because it feels like a more mature version of "nothing new;" it's a little kinder to the ingenue and seems to respect her predecessors, recognize that She was the ingenue once, but it does not match up to her actual conduct in public. this is where i become very asian, but besides her being uhhh... pretty drunk at the grammys this year, i think her behavior is more a symptom of white american culture as egoistic and ahistorical—this is the kamala harris "you think you fell out of a coconut tree" meme, yes, but more broadly my complaint is filial piety. acting up in front of the likes of celine dion and tracy chapman and joni mitchell, especially on a night that celebrates all three of them, is absolutely unacceptable to me. they're your elders, they paved the path you're on (nothing new: "she'll know the way, and then she'll say she got the map from me"), but her teenage fans who've never heard any other music don't know or accept that she Isn't actually the progenitor of acclaimed women singer-songwriters

she wants to be seen as a "cool big sister" mentor to younger pop girls or boosting indie acts like boygenius, but afaik she herself hasn't shared the stage with an older female musician since alanis morrissette as a surprise guest on the 1989 tour. sure, she showed up to induct carole king to the rock 'n roll hall of fame, with a solo stage. but as much as people first cringed at luke combs' "fast car" cover, he acquitted himself with his grammy performance. there is true reverence there. if taylor brings stevie nicks (who wrote a poem?? for the ttpd physical editions) onstage at some point soon, i'll Maybe start to believe she doesn't see women over 40 as piles of dust she's either embarrassed to stand near Or, you know, who expose that she did not in fact fall out of a coconut tree, and have more stage presence sitting down than she does in sequins