#COBRA FRY

[arunparia]

The Cobra Eaters

Hanoi, 2022

When it’s cut from the body with one chop, in Hang Ha Noi restaurant, the king cobra’s severed head yawns. In the death dream, the fangs come out to bite, then hide inside the sleeping jaws. The headless body leaps high from the metal pan, gets tangled with the wiggling tail. Minutes later, it’s skinned, slit with kitchen knife, dripping blood into a plastic cup.

It’s still alive. In a way we’re alive when we recuse the body to sleep, tuck our fangs in in a helpless yawn, poison hid in the nook of the heart. The sleeping torsos jerk at the thud of a chop, thump the ground with a fuming tail: when we cobra eaters crawl in the hollow of the night slowly serpentine between dream and death.

(The poem was first published in Issue 15 of HeartWood Literary Magazine: http://www.heartwoodlitmag.com/the-cobra-eaters , and then in Outlook: https://www.outlookindia.com/culture-society/five-poems-about-people-across-the-world-weekender_story-328626)

[gemini-sensei]

Ephyra!reader and fry!reader need to become besties because they both grew up as outcasts

Agreed! @sensei-venus

They'd get along so well too! They'd be so enamored by their similarities because they both have tentacles. They dance around and swish their tentacles around. They don't get too close while they are dancing because ephyra!Reader doesn't want to sting fry!Reader by accident.

Omg! They'll sit together and play, do each other's hair, dress up and sp much more. They talk quietly to each other and share ideas and giggle. As they get older, they might even shit talk all the people who think wrongly of them, who judge them and so on.

!!!! What if they are buddies! Because their swimming patterns are similar!

Yes! Yes! Yes!

[legocobrakai]

"I call it 'Out of the frying pan, into the fire.'"

Here's your first look at the opening eight minutes of #CobraKaiSeason6 Part 1: https://www.netflix.com/tudum/articles/cobra-kai-season-6-premiere-sneak-peek

[southerndragontamer]

You Only Get Three Strikes

This is my interpretation of how things after the amazing fanart by @andaboop went

Actor hummed an old tune to himself as he adjusted his tie in the mirror and flashed himself a grin. He had just finished up setting things up for the confrontation with Dark in their next encounter, he wondered if it would work enough he could bring out Damien again. He had sent his….no not partner, that was reserved for someone else…..like minded fellow? That sounded right, out to go through the plan Actor had crafted for him about some hero, magician? Whoever the target he was after.

He’d really lucked out in meeting the other, it was always nice to have a trump card in your pocket and though he was a bit…jagged around the edges the actor was confident that the shared interest in their respective goals would help him figure out how to direct those edges the way he’d like.

His thought process was derailed when the door was slammed open. No, that wasn’t quite right, it wasn’t slammed so much as kicked in so hard it flew to the opposite wall. He whirled around, cane in hand ready to defend himself as his mind immediately jumped to William or Damien only to blink as he saw the glitch there. His smile fit into place as he relaxed.

“Oh it’s you my friend! You gave me a heart attack there-”

His voice cut off by force by a clawed hand that snapped around it with the speed of a striking cobra, or a bear trap when it shut from the pressure plate being triggered. He gagged and choked and instinctively tried to pry away the fingers that felt like they were going to snap his windpipe in two. He attempted to kick as he was lifted into the air and slammed against the wall.

Anti’s face was twisted in a near wild fury, all his fangs bared and body glitching as the lights began to flicker and dim. His eyes were glowing like a live wire as he spat out, Irish accent thickened even further than normal.

“Shut yer damn mouth. I don’t wanna hear a sound outta ye, unless I say you can talk.”

Actor couldn’t have tried to speak right now if he wanted to, he tried to nod as his vision swam with black spots. Just as he thought he was going to pass out, or need to reconstruct his throat again, he was let go and dropped like a sack of bricks. He held in the gasp as oxygen flooded into his lungs and covered his mouth to muffle the cough as he looked up at the glitch for a reason why he’d suddenly flown off the handle.

Anti’s glare was like looking at a lightning strike inches from where you stood, the sense of if he wasn’t careful he’d have to dig himself out of a grave again. The glitch stepped back and manifested his knife as he started to absently twirl it in his fingers with the ease of someone that had wielded a blade for a long time.

“I was willing to give ye a chance ya know, at working together. You talk a big game pretty boy. But you can’t cash it. I went with that ‘plan’ of yours that ye made for me. And do you wanna know what happened?”

Actor felt his stomach start to knot and sink, his heart picked up and he felt the hair raise on the back of his neck at the way the lights flickered and threatened to pop, sparks arced off of the glitch’s skin as his voice dropped into a growling hiss.

“I had the magician about to collapse at my feet when the damned timekeeper intervened. They got away from me. Oh I can find em again, easy as breathing, my strings don’t allow any less. But it’s the principle of it all.”

Actor resisted the urge to hunch in on himself as Anti’s head snapped around at a sickeningly off angle and speed and instead he began to try to save face, backpedal as he stood up. His best apologetic expression on as he tried to keep from going out of the frying pan into the fire. His eyes shone a brighter red and he weaved his own kind of power into his words like red ribbon braided together to hide blood.

“I’m sorry that it didn’t work like I intended friend, but I didn’t take everything into account it seems when I made my plan.”

That was as far as the ‘apology’, because such a word was only proper in a true sense of remorse for actions, got as he found his jaw exploded in pain from the literally lightning fast blow to one side. He felt bone crunch and fracture as he collapsed to the floor and held his jaw in place as it began to repair itself.

Only to choke and blood to spurt out of his mouth by the sharp kick that echoed with the cracking of ribs, just as quickly he was hauled up by the collar of his suit and the knife was pressed deeply against his skin. Ruby droplets trailed down the edge of the blade as Anti half snarled.

“I told you. Not. A. Sound. You must not have much grey matter between your ears, or you’re just a glutton to get your arse beaten. So let me explain this in a way you’ll be sure to understand.”

Actor winced and his eyes squinted as the glowering, searing light of Anti’s eyes were right in front of him. The knife cut in just a bit deeper into his skin. The glitch’s tone went from utterly furious about to stab someone, to calm and measured and almost cold rage that was somehow almost more terrifying.

“If you’re not one of my puppets, you get three strikes. Your first mistake was fockin things up for me reclaiming one of mine. The second one was the half-arsed, shite apology ya tried to make.”

And Anti grinned, slow and cruel and his eyes had a sadistic glint in them as he chuckled and finished in an almost croon. The lights shone green and the white noise of static snow started to hurt Actor’s ears enough to make him wince and he swore for a second something started to bleed.

“Your final strike? Thinking I was too stupid to know you didn’t expect more out of me than dumb muscle eager to get to fighting, someone that wouldn’t question anything.”

The lights flared such a bright green that it went white and then popped with the sound of fizzling soda and shattered glass. Actor subconsciously, human instinct still ingrained after so long of being inhuman, flinched, shut his eyes and covered his head. The sound of shrieking static made him cover his ears as they ached and he was positive he felt his eardrums burst, his head ached as the sound pierced through his skull.

The shrieking came again, not just a wall of sound but laughter. Actor had never been one that dealt well with being made a joke, pride bristled in indignation as his eyes snapped open and he started to growl, to snap back at the glitch for being so ungrateful for his help. His mask dropped as his true form slipped through the handsome image he portrayed. Like the true face of Dorian Grey, sickened, rotten and ugly.

Only he saw that Anti had dropped his mask as well…

Instead of a human with glowing green eyes, sharp claws and fangs to betray the inhuman underneath…what stood in front of Actor was something that could only be called eldritch. Lightning and static in a silhouette that was humanoid but not, it glitched and twisted on itself, crackling at the seams. He blinked and it shifted each time as if it couldn’t decide on how to ‘appear’. Too long, too many ‘limbs’ too long claws that took the place of fingers, jaws filled with rows and rows of razor blade fangs, it looked too big for the space it was in, the walls creaked and groaned with the strain to hold it in.

His head ached like the worst migraine he’d ever had, his ears rang and he felt blood dripping from his nose, the world felt like it tilted and he felt like he was going to throw up. There was a rumbling of thunder and then he was aware of his body falling and convulsing as his brain lit up with only agony as a reason. Past the pain and the searing white noise in his ears that felt like it was trying to break his mind apart, he grit his teeth at the shrieking, piercing laugh that had him swallow down bile.

“Already on the ground writhing like a snake without its head~ You thought you were such a tough shot because you constantly annoyed Dark, ohhh boyo you got no idea of what forces you’re playing with now~”

The sensation of barbed wire cutting and tearing, ripping into his skin as the glitch’s strings wrapped around his limbs and yanked him up to his feet. Up further still to Anti’s ‘face’…too many eyes, shades of green, black, blue and some brown, they looked like fractured images through cracks in a mirror. The glitch’s body waved and rose as it spoke, like watching a sound wave on a computer screen.

As much as Actor tried to hold it in, as he finally realized how in over his head he was, that making a deal with the glitch had been a horrible mistake, when he felt the lightning forced through his body again, he screamed. Anti’s cackling laughter of delight rang in his ears and covered the sound as it echoed in on itself.

“It’s been a while since I had a chance to play with something that can survive it~ Oh yes, I’m aware you can’t stay dead~ You’re gonna wish you were back in that manor when I get bored of you~”

[incorrect-skylanders-quotes]

Skylanders That Haven't Been Used On This Blog Yet (Updated again!)

I'd like to get at least one quote with every Skylander, so if you have any ideas please submit them!

(*) means they were mentioned, but haven't gotten a proper quote.

SWAP Force:

Dune Bug

Rip Tide

Rubble Rouser

Scorp

Stink Bomb

Fryno

Trap Team:

Cobra Cadabra

Jawbreaker

Chopper

Krypt King

Thunderbolt

Flip Wreck*

Wallop

Fist Bump

Imaginators:

Pain-Yatta

Dr. Neo Cortex

Grave Clobber

Tri-Tip*

Minis:

Barkley

Gill Runt

Terrabite

Thumpling

Small Fry

Weeruptor

Ring of Heroes Portal Masters:

George

Bruno

Ryeo

Oscar

Adriana

[brainyxbat]

Chapter 26: That Looks Gator-Ish! Luffy, Run to the Royal Tomb!

(episode 123)

As Luffy continued to struggle against Crocodile, Robin and Cobra arrived at the Mortuary Temple, west of the palace. They stopped at the ascending, stone staircase. "So this is the Royal Tomb," She remarked, "Where the bodies of generations of kings sleep." She turned to Cobra. "Where's the Poneglyph?" Without a word, he approached a statue featuring a cat-fish hybrid, and pushed it aside to face the path; a rectangular section of the ground rose up, revealing a staircase going under the ground. "Hidden stairs!" They headed down, with her walking ahead of him.

"The Poneglyph is deep underground. Normally, people aren't even aware of Poneglyphs' existence."

"What's happening behind the scenes is deep," Robin cut him off, "Even if countries belong to the World Government, it doesn't mean their kings know everything. You aren't to be blamed; since you probably didn't know there was someone in this world who can decipher them."

"You can read Poneglyphs?" Cobra asked with surprise.

"Yes. That's why Crocodile and I teamed up. Because of that, he can't kill me." She suddenly stopped walking. "It's likely that the Poneglyph in this country tells where Pluton is." She turned to Cobra with a piercing stare. "Isn't that right?"

"Alabasta's royal family has been obligated for generations to protect it. That's all it is to us."

"Protect?! Don't make me laugh!" After he tensed up, they continued their trek. "What an impressive-looking place," She remarked after they reached the tomb.

"It's behind the doors in the back."

Now eager, she opened the large doors, and walked deeper inside, while Cobra stayed back. "Indeed..."

-

Meanwhile, Usopp and Zoro were still searching for the cannoneer. Or at least, Zoro was; Usopp seemed to be taking a different approach. He seemed to be imitating Crocodile, down to his laugh, and a gold piece on his right hand. "You small fry!" He mocked.

Zoro swung a hard punch to his head. "What the heck are you doing?!"

"What am I doing?!" Usopp glared. "I'm trying to put myself in Crocodile's shoes! Like if I were him, where would I shoot a cannon from?"

"Forget it! Just look for the cannoneer! We've got less than five minutes!"

'Five more minutes!' Chopper ran through the streets in Walk Point with Nami. 'A million lives will be blown up in five minutes! We gotta hurry; we gotta hurry up, and find the cannoneer!'

"Chopper!" She turned to him. "Can't you find the guy using your nose?"

"I can't. The smell of gunpowder is all over the town!"

"Then... listen; find the smell of "a cannoneer who may be aiming at the center of the Square"."

"What kind of smell is that?"

"How should I know?! Try your best!"

"What?!"

Elsewhere, Sanji was dashing like mad, carrying a slower Venus on his back. 'A cannonball that can blow up a 5k diameter,' He thought, before screeching to a sudden stop. "Wait; then it must be big."

"What're we stopping for?!" Venus exclaimed, but he was too deep in his analysis.

"If it is to be shot from a cannon, it won't travel very far. Then it should be closer to the Square after all?!" He went to run back the way they came, but stopped himself. "Ahh! We don't time to go around!" He fussed, and to Venus' surprise, he kicked a hole into a building close by. "We'll take a shortcut!"

"Good thinking!" Venus beamed, keeping her grip firm.

"How is it from the sky, Pell?!" Vivi called out.

"I searched every corner of the rooftops of the buildings near the Square, but I saw no preparation for a cannon anywhere."

"Then... it might be from somewhere inside a building."

"I'll search all of them!"

"Okay!"

-

In the Royal Tomb, as four minutes until the cannonball would be shot in the Square, Cobra watched from sitting by the doors, as Robin looked over the stone Poneglyph before her silently. "Did it tell you what you wanted to know?" He didn't receive an answer, as she still read it over.

"Aren't there any others?! Is this all this country is hiding?"

"You're not satisfied? I kept my promise."

"Yes..."

Just then, someone else entered: Crocodile! "Just as you'd expect from a national secret; no matter how desperately you search, it can't be found unless you know where it is. So this is the Poneglyph, huh, Nico Robin?"

"That didn't take long," She remarked.

"It's strange, or how should I put it... we you able to decipher it?"

"Yes."

"Good. Now read the so-called Poneglyph."

She turned back to the stone block, and read aloud. "Kahira conquered Alabasta... in Sky Ephemeris Year 239. In 260, Taymer ruled the Bitain Dynasty. In 306, the Taff Cathedral was completed in Erumalu. In 325, the hero Mamdin of Oltia-"

The impatient Crocodile stopped her reading. "Hey, hey, wait, wait! Is that what we wanna know?! Who cares about the history of this country? Just tell me the location of the world's most disastrous "military power" that is sleeping in this country! Where is the Pluton?!"

After a moment of silence, Robin turned back to him. "It's not written here."

"What?!"

"History is the only thing written here."

"Is that true?!"

"Pluton; I didn't see that word mentioned even once."

More silence followed, as Crocodile took her words in. "Well, I see; that's unfortunate. You've been an excellent partner to me, but..." His gaze on her darkened. "I think I'll kill you here."

"Wha-?!" She stepped back in shock.

"The agreement we made four years ago has been achieved here. This is what you said then; if I take you to where the Poneglyph is, you'd turn over the information on the weapon to me. Your work in Baroque Works these past four years was excellent, both in terms of brainpower, and command ability. That's enough for me; to say that you were a useful woman. But... you broke your word at the end!" He thrusted his hook at her, and her white cowgirl hat flew off. "The Poneglyph in this country doesn't even show a clue on the Pluton. Or is it that you weren't planning to tell me from the start, even if you found out?" She was scared, but kept her composure; he had her there. "However, I don't feel any anger against you. You know why, Nico Robin?"

She smirked at him. "How silly; we were a team for four years. I knew you'd pull something like this."

She pulled a vial out of her coat, and threw it in his direction. A hand grew out of his back, and caught it by his head. "Water?!"

"If you get wet, a knife can stick in you, right?!" Wielding a knife, she ran straight for him, but he disappeared in a cloud of sand before he could get doused in water. "He dodged it! Where'd he-?"

He appeared behind her: and stabbed his hook in her upper back, through her chest! "I'll forgive you for everything... Nico Robin." He thrusted it out, and let her fall limp to the floor. "Because I've never trusted anyone from the beginning." He looked down at the unconscious woman. "I now know from Cobra's reaction that Pluton really exists. I don't have to depend on the Poneglyph; I'll find it on my own. Once this country becomes mine, it's just a matter of time." He stopped when the tomb began rumbling like there was an earthquake. "Hm?! What's going on?! It's still too early for the attack on the Square!" He turned to the silent Cobra. "it must be you. What'd you do?!"

"Well, nothing major. This underground sacred temple is built so that pulling just one small column out cause the entire balance to be disrupted, and destroy the temple. You two will die in here with me; as the 12th king of the Nefertari Family, I can't give this sand kingdom to someone like you."

-

Outside, Vivi was still running, when her sandals gave out, and she fell to the ground. She held back her tears, as she held her bleeding knee. Where is it? Three minutes left... A cannon big enough to blow up a 5k diameter; there can't be many places where such a thing would fit. Why can't we find it when we search this much? An open space where a cannon would fit.

Behind her, Usopp leaped away when a bullet was astray from the armies' ongoing battle. "A stray bullet!"

Vivi suddenly perked up. "An open space... that's right." She recalled finding Koza's hiding place in their childhood. "That place can..."

"That's dangerous, you bastard!" Usopp reprimanded. "Smoke Star!"

"It doesn't attract people's attention, and it's a big space."

"Idiot! Ahh!" Usopp ran away from the fight, chased by a royal soldier. "I'm not from the Rebel Army! Usopp Hammer! Usopp's Rubberband of Doom! Did that teach you, you bastard! Geez; who do they think I am?" He confronted the armies again. "Don't be surprised when I tell you this. No, be surprised! I am that famous Captain U-" He was cut off by Vivi grabbing his nose to avert his attention. "What? O-oh, it's you, Vivi. Did you find the cannoneer?!"

"I figured it out! It's gotta be there!"

"What?! Really?! Okay, then! I'll signal them!" He dug his slingshot back out, and aimed it to the sky. "In any case, I'll call everyone! You're sure about it, right?"

"Yes!" She nodded with determination.

"Special Attack: Red Serpent Star!" He sent a red smoke trail above all the buildings.

"Ahh?!" Chopper spotted it while in Heavy Point, stopping Nami from running.

"Oh?!" Sanji saw it from where he stood, alongside Venus and Pell.

"Usopp's signal!" She beamed.

Zoro, amazingly, wound up in a jungle completely separate from the city, and missed the signal. Luffy, who was sleeping off his injuries outside the tomb, missed it as well. He did wake up, however, and sat himself up. "Boy, I slept well. Huh-? Oh, that's right; my body suddenly became incapable of moving, so I decided to risk it, and take a nap since it couldn't be helped. And now I feel fine, so... oh yeah!" He punched his palm after remembering his mission, and shot to his feet. "Gator! I'll beat him up!" He ran like mad, before screeching to a stop, and noticing the strange staircase. "That hole..." He panted, "It looks gator-ish."

-

"Whoa, you're a model king," Crocodile commended Cobra through the quaking, "Are you trying to be buried alive, taking me with you, for the country?! But you can't kill me."

"Hm?"

"I can change all the bedrocks into sand, and escape from here," He laughed mockingly, "You'll die in vain, Cobra." He turned to the ceiling. "It's now less than three minutes; with the collapse of this sacred temple, and the big explosion of the Square, everyone in my way will be blown up in an instant!" He turned back to Cobra. "In that moment, this land will become my country." The trembling seemed to increase, as his evil laughter rang throughout the temple.

Through it all, Luffy was sprinting down the staircases, furious. 'Crocodile!! Where are you?!'

[msfbgraves]

I'm rewatching the Karate Kid trilogy, and I'm once again struck by Daniel's sweetness and his capacity for affection and love. Yes, he's sassy, and hot-headed, and mouthy...but his true defining trait is his kind, good heart. I don't understand people who hate him in Cobra Kai, or think HE'S the villain (!!!!) to Johnny Lawrence, the world's most immature man, a terrible parent, and a genuine loser.

I don't know if they hate Daniel for being successful and wealthy but still compassionate and sweet, or what it is. He's a very good dad, husband, and friend who is still imperfect and flawed. He's been right from the start concerning Cobra Kai.

I also hate the whole demonizing of his wonderful relationship with Mr. Miyagi!! It makes me sick.

I'm sorry that the creators of this show and 12 year olds on tik-tok and Johnny fans hate Daniel when he's so loveable. I'd love to have a guy like that in my life, may it be a friend or a husband. He's the best.

He is the best, Nonnie, but some people can't handle that. What they see is someone being demonstrably good, and kind, and what they recognise is: I'm not like that, and Being that kind would be work, I'm not there yet, and then Am I willing to put the work in? And then you can get Nah, I'm good, (Louie), Yes, of course (Bobby) or No, and fuck you for making me aware of that!! I shouldn't have to work on myself!!! I want to be loved as a shit person!!!!

Now with Daniel you also mix in "And I'm gay for him...!" Which can also drive people really mean. And when you're twelve on TikTok... I've woken up 20 years later and thought: OMG, I was an asshole and I had no idea. Not continuously but we all have bad days or don't yet know how to be at the receiving end of shitty behaviour. That's human. It's part of growing up to learn how to imagine being someone else and anticipating what your deeds may mean for someone else. Some people, like Daniel, have enormous hearts and can do this instinctively, almost without effort. It's harder for others. He doesn't seek all that much power, Daniel. Johnny does and that's fine. But what Cobra Kai didn't teach - something that's immensely important - is how to give yourself your own power kick. And that is finding something you enjoy doing and hitting milestones there. Be it winning the All Valley or saving up for a trip or nursing a goldfish or winning a level or building something in Minecraft or flying to Mars or learning how to deep fry your own Haggis or editing a vid. It doesn't matter as long as it doesn't hurt people. Hurting people is the easiest, lowest, most self destructive power kick you can imagine. And if you never learn constructive power kicks, and hurt your own relationships because you're mean to others.... it isn't it easy to resent people that are liked? That people are drawn to? That can be huge dorks and get away with it? It's so unfair!

And if you're twelve you'll learn how to be a person and regulate your own emotions and work for what you want, even when others seem to have it easier. It's a problem though when you haven't learnt this by 52. Because those people look at Miyagi and think: how dare he make me feel bad for being nice, I'll get him for that, especially now Pat isn't alive to oppose me, look at how clever I am, I'll show them!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mx-piggy]

i've already posted about this in the past but like i really need to watch Cobra Kai, just because i need to be able to write a reader-insert fic where the reader is Johnny Lawrence's lameass trans kid. like they don't know karate. they're an adult (like 18-20) and they still live with him. they're mostly a loser. they're Philip J. Fry-coded. i'm sure that would be an interesting dynamic. it would definitely heal me. i know i can't write it until i finally watch Cobra Kai. oh boy i sure wish someone would write something like this.

[marinerainbow]

I have four official AU's for the WFRR universe. One of which I already posted about (The Toon Medic AU), but I got three more.

The last two are more horror related though, so unless someone asks I won't post them. This one however, is literally just changing the species of the characters. So, despite the fact that nobody asked, here is my

WFRR Monster AU

Tagging @wicked1will0sparkles so you can see ^^

Basically, instead of there being toons, there are different species of monsters. The humans are still humans, so it's monsters and humans coexisting. And it still takes place in the late forties. This barely does anything to the plot, I just love fantasy/monster AU's.

The monsters the toons would be are:

Roger Rabbit: Fairy. In fea folklore, there are all types of fairies, including more friendly fairies. Roger would be one of those. He's not the most powerful fairy, but he does have some magic, that he uses to bring happiness to people. Though if he's pushed to far, like his wife being kidnapped, he could easily use his magic to confront the offenders.

He's not Tinker Bell size, though he is still small. So even though he's not a toon rabbit anymore, he's still a shorty potorty. And yes, he's got wings (he's a cute and funny guy, the wings would help emphasize that).

Jessica Rabbit: Gorgon (I'm willing to bet my whole check that somebody thought that she was gonna be a siren or succubus). With the stories surrounding Medusa, especially with the slightly happier ending to how Medusa became the way she is, I think gorgon would fit Jessica more. Her poisonous snakes and petrifying gaze is her defense against groping men instead of booby traps and frying pans.

Jessica is still a gorgeous woman. Aside from the snakes in her hair, powers, and more reptilian eyes, she looks normal. I like to imagine that her snakes have hoods, like cobras, to make her hair more round, like how her hair ends are more curved in the movie. And yes, they all give Roger kisses too.

Baby Herman: Goblin. Don't let the tiny man fool you, Herman is still a bastard, and is not afraid at all to use his cute appearance to get what he wants. He is pretty old despite what his appearance may indicate, just like in the movie. He and Roger are still friends too.

Unlike other fea, he rarely bothers using his magic. He's a star, so nobody will be a threat to him- according to his ego. And like I said, he knows how to play cute, so he's got that going for him.

Benny the Cab: Mechanical Being. This one was pretty easy. Who knows how this machine was given life. All that we do know, is that he decided to serve the people as a smart-mouthed cab. There are rumors that it was actually Roger who gave Benny life, considering their strong bond. Though this hasn't been confirmed- or denied.

I'm not entirely sure if I want him to remain a car, or if he can shift his body to become something else like a transformer. I'm leaning more towards the first option though.

Judge Doom: Unknown. Nobody knows who, or what, the mysterious judge was. Obviously he is a shape-shifter, though that is the only clue to his true identity. After all, part of the mystery was who Doom really was in the movie, why not have it be the same in this AU?

Doom looks pretty much the same as he does in the movie. His transformations are less toony though.

Smartass Weasel: Werewolf. On the surface, the sergeant looks like any other human, and he's able to carry himself like one. However, Anyone who's been around him notices his oddly heightened senses and strength. If pushed too far, you might even see his eyes flash momentarily. But if he needs to, he can and will summon his more beastly side.

Smartass, as stated above, is able to pass as a human. As such, it makes him the most ideal to lead the Patrol, and interact with other humans. Just be sure to avoid him on the full moon.

Greasy Weasel: Incubus. Other than his overt sexual nature, this right-hand man might look normal too. However, if one were to look closely, one might notice his more hellish features through his glamor. Though most people just brush it off as a trick of the light.

Like Smartass, Greasy looks like a human, though he doesn't has as good of a handle on himself; the more lascivious he gets, the more obvious that he's not human (Also uses his Incubus powers to charm women into sleeping with him)

Wheezy Weasel: Ghoul. Not to be confused with a mindless zombie. He may be undead, but he still has his own will and mind after being mysteriously brought back to life. At least now he can smoke all he wants with no risk to his health. Though the stench you smell when he enters the room is a bit more than the cigarettes...

Wheezy has wrappings and stitches all over him, to cover and close all the wounds he's accumulated that won't heal. Other than that, he could look like any other human too... Just don't try to take his food away from him when he's eating.

Psycho Weasel: Poltergeist. With that scene in the end where, even after he died, he still managed to almost kill Jessica and Roger, I knew this was perfect for him. Even though he's dead, don't underestimate the absolute nightmare this loon can and will be for you. And since he's already dead-dead, he has no worries of being killed or re-killed like the others. As such, this ghost has very little reason to hold back.

Don't invite this little shit into your house. He will cause problems just because he can. From slyly placing objects in different places to making the exorcism movies look like a Disney franchise.

Stupid Weasel: Troll. Big, dumb, and brute strength all in one package. Pretty straightforward. No one knows why he follows Smarty around, he may not even know himself. Though the creature seems to have gotten attached to the werewolf somehow and will do what he says, and pretty much got adopted into the gang when he wouldn't go away.

In troll folklore, they turn to stone in the sun. So Stupid doesn't like going out at that time. If he has to, he'll bring something to cover himself like a huge blanket or a parasol. It's almost cute, until you remember this guy can squash you like a grape.

Eddie (and Teddy) Valient: Monster Hunter. To call him a hunter wouldn't entirely be accurate. He and Teddy protected humans from monsters, yes, but they also protected the monsters too. It wasn't until Teddy's death at the hands of a mysterious creature did Eddie swore to never work or help creatures again.

He doesn't actively hunt the creatures, but he doesn't step in when Judge Doom and the Monster Patrol take over Los Angeles either. It isn't until a certain fairy comes to him pleading for help that he's able to slowly come back.

Dolores: Monster Huntress. In the movie, the picture frame containing the picture of Eddie, Teddy, and Dolores says "Two Flatfoots and a Floozy enter a Business", heavily implying that Dolores was indeed a part of their business. The case would be the same in this AU. And just like in the movie, she branched off to become a bartender when the business started going under to try to help both herself and Eddie.

Like in the movie, Dolores is fearless and witty in this AU. She still cares for Eddie, but she's at her wit's end too. In the end, she just wants what's best for them both.

There are certain scenes from the movie I want to write out but in the Monster AU. This post is already pretty long, so I'll save the scene re-writes for another day.

That's that! I hope you guys like this. Any questions you guys have, I'll be more than happy to answer ^^

[x-heesy]

Hell y Ass 🤘

Gif mood board 🏄‍♀️

Yeah

Cut the head off the basilisk, in the grass hunting

Anybody coming after me, get no pass from me

Oh my god, this is blasphemous, they don't blast for me

Just trying to get this fast money, you a crash dummy

Fill my heart with the darkness, I feel like Ansem

Get them grumpy at the game, oh they're Arin Hanson

SP where I came boy, I stay advancing

CRT ghosting, I am Danny Phantom

Shit, I'm going off on tangents, still I get the cosine

Lay them on they back, wait, that shit is no lie

Younging's stepping to me saying that my shit is old time

I've been Lo-fi since before you called it Lo-fi, bitch

In a bull fight pit, trying to hold my shit

Wave a flag same color as a old spice stick

Read the scrolls I writ, how you've grown to exist

What is Jar Jar Binks, to the four five six?

When I die, put the bullet on my tombstone

Sorry who are you? Couldn't tell like this a new phone

Covered up in gold, buried underneath a dark sky

If you're trying to rob me you're gonna have to find the clue scroll

Pharaoh cloth wrapping me, caught in this catastrophe

You ain't been the same since we dropped, boy that's sad to see

Captains at the wheel, you don't want to be a casualty

Lost in my lane, if you're hating, get the savagery

Doubled up on bad investment

Probably try if I had contestants

Got 'em gasping like asthma breaths and

They all mad, looking sad and desperate

Love the looks that I get, when I pass pedestrians

And all the words that you got ain't

Mean shit when the devil speak in Latin

You can possum and piss on yourself when he passing

Cause it's all in the fist, like the heart of the dragon

You a passionate kid, but you old now, what happened?

Want my cash little bitch? Didn't think so

Please don't ever hit me up on my cellphone

Said my cash low, bitch? Didn't think so

Better get the price right, this ain't Plinko

Want my cash little bitch? Didn't think so

Please don't ever hit me up on my cellphone

Said my cash low, bitch? Didn't think so

Better get the price right, this ain't Plinko

I want that cash money, rap money

Everything is trash money

Bitch, I feel like Jimmy Neutron

'Cause I got that blast on me

Watch my wrist, it does glisten, fridge

You is just a pussy bitch

I can tell 'cause your mom's dressed you in that Rip and Dip

Yeah, welcome to the Black Parade

We saving face like labor day

We doing shit the fatal way

You cannot keep up with the pace

It's cloud mac with that booky shit

Music biz, lucrative

Bitch I feel like Harrison

I'm a fucking fugitive

Bumping MCR, Sony MDRs on me

I fill up every bar fully, feel my empty heart

Jody Highroller never love a bitch, could've made the league

Rap game whoever, just throw a name on the beat

The flow is ever discreet, I am anything but

Like our denim we tough, so tie an enemy up

And I'll fry them granted he fucked, the ire in me is spilling over

Akin to cobras how I spit before I kill them slowly

Rest in peace, tearing throats open like they mezzanines

Blow like desert eagle let the smoke up out my chest to breath

Keenly coded with the meanest kinda motus

And the coldest soul eroded no condolence till I'm older, got a

Callous style it's all malice a foul paladin

Silence I found solace in sliding these sly talons in

Blessed with maligned madness and chatter that chall acquiesce

Black is my soul agonous bragging, we so back in this

Want my cash little bitch? Didn't think so

Please don't ever hit me up on my cellphone

Said my cash low, bitch? Didn't think so

Better get the price right, this ain't Plinko

Want my cash little bitch? Didn't think so

Please don't ever hit me up on my cellphone

Said my cash low, bitch? Didn't think so

Better get the price right, this ain't Plinko

Basilisk by Cemetery Drive

[tranquilitybasehotelcasino]

You got me listening to so much cobra starship on repeat its frying my brain but I've yet to touch an mcr song.

re: cobra starship…..just as planned. re: mcr obviously you don’t HAVE to listen to them but if you’re into more electro/dance stuff well. i will never pass up a chance to gas up danger days

[lonesomedotmp3]

amvs that are simply never getting finished. kiara carrera drunk drivers/killer whales. morgana pendragon hermit the frog. riverdale you give death a bad name. the pendragons family jewels. lancelot and merlin enchanted. archie andrews between the bars. cobra kai the chain. samtory dancing in the dark. merlin and arthur smoke slow. merlin and arthur me and my husband. brendan fry I'm just a kid. john b and sarah cameron hollywood. morgana pendragon toxic. merlin and morgana one way or another. I know for a fact there are at least a dozen more I can't remember rn

[grapenehifics]

Chapter 56

(Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/40473339/chapters/111176644#workskin)

Disneyland opened Star Wars land like a year or two before the pandemic but I didn't get a chance to go before it closed. I dealt with this (very first world problem) by making these fictional characters go to Disneyland for me...although of course they can't actually go to Star Wars land (which didn't exist in the year this chapter is set anyway), nor acknowledge that Star Tours exists.

-I did go on a school trip to Disneyland once, for kids who had a certain GPA, so that is a thing that happens. (Or at least used to happen. I don't know about now. Disneyland keeps getting more expensive every year.)

-I just realized in editing this chapter that the story I wrote for NaNoWriMo this year also has Obi-Wan braiding hair.

-Grumbling about parking costs and bringing in your own sandwiches? This is basically Disneyland with my family 101.

-Obi-Wan trying to take a map and Anakin not letting him is a callback to the chapter where they went to the Getty together.

-Pre-cellphones, picking a meeting spot 'in case we get separated' in theme parks was a huge deal.

-I think Disneyland finally realized those stupid French-fry looking bronze rocks by the entrance to Tomorrowland were really ugly and are getting rid of them.

-The key to having a good time at Disneyland in general, and on the Jungle Cruise in particular, is really leaning into the corniness of it.

-First Visit buttons are real, and you can get them just for the asking! I've seen them at Universal, too.

-Of course Anakin would wonder what something is called while standing directly under the very large sign that tells you what it is called.

-One of my running jokes in this story is that Anakin has basically no pop-culture knowledge whatsoever. (We'll pretend that in this universe, like ours except Star Wars doesn't exist, Harrison Ford is just slightly less famous.)

-Yes, Obi-Wan and Anakin realizing they both find the same man attractive but Ahsoka did not is an incredibly backhanded nod to Ahsoka being a lesbian. It's not really relevant to this story because she's fourteen, but in general I will probably write her as a lesbian in everything I write ever.

-(Movie night will become important next chapter)

-Between the riverboat, the canoes, the shooting gallery, and mint juleps, this fic is getting into some deep-cut Disneyland activities, here.

-Don't even get me started on COBRA, UGH

-(Water polo will come up again next chapter, too)

-It is almost impossible for Obi-Wan to have a nice day without some sort of emotional crisis. Today's comes courtesy of Ahsoka asking him to be her backup guardian (yes there probably is a more technical term for that).

-I also got started playing Heads Up Charades because I saw other groups doing it while in line for Space Mountain. (Yes there is a Star Wars category.)

-Anakin's dialogue about Steve McQueen (and Daniel Craig, and Ewan McGregor) mirrors my own opinions. (The first time I saw Daniel Craig was in a trailer for Casino Royale and I had to forcibly remind myself that human cloning doesn't exist because he just looked so much like Steve McQueen to me.)

-Yes, Lightning McQueen the character is named after Steve McQueen the actor.

-When I picture Ahsoka saying, "He's really bad at opening jars," I'm actually picturing April Ludgate talking about her three-legged dog Champion. "Champion's great at everything! Except digging. He's really bad at digging."

-Matterhorn no longer has the cuddle seats, but they used to have cuddle seats, where you put the taller person in the back and the shorter person sat between their legs. This provided a realm of opportunities to horny high schoolers, so long as you could fit it in the three-minute or so window while the ride lasted (and was probably also why they redesigned the cuddle seats).

-I like the dynamic of Anakin, usually so competitive, simply sitting back and admiring Obi-Wan being really good at air rifles.

-Indiana Jones is, IMO, the gold standard of theme parks giving you things to do while you wait in line. Pull this! Watch this! Decipher these hieroglyphics!

-If you can time it right, my favorite place to watch fireworks is while in line for/riding the Matterhorn. (You can also *sort of* see Fantasmic while in line for Haunted Mansion, fyi).

[gingerlee-holds]

thank you so so much for the tag, cobra!!! i needed a break from writing this STUpid paper lmao

T- "These Foolish Things" by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong H-"Hey There Delilah" by Plain White T's E- "Electric Love" by Børns G- "Groceries" by Mallrat I- "I Hear a Symphony" by Cody Fry N- "No. 13, Dance of the Knights" by Sergei Prokofiev G- "God Must Hate Me" by Catie Turner E- "Enderman Rap" by Dan Bull R- "Rasputin" by Boney M. B- "Bezos I" by Bo Burnham R- "Rêverie" by Claude Debussy E- "Étude Op. 10, No. 6" by Frédéric Chopin A- "(The) Amazing Digital Circus Theme" by Gooseworx D- "Down Under" by Men at Work L- "Life Could Be A Dream" by Street Corner Renaissance E- "Evil Morty" by Lucas King E- "Escapism" by Steven Universe

fUCK WHY DO I HAVE SO MANY E'S IN MY NAME JESUS-

alright, you know the drill, tagging random people from my 'Getting to Know You' survey: @joker-anon, @xavitron883, @fluffomatic, @nox-in-a-box-1316, @lee-lucius, @jinleebelee, @totallynotbat, @skylolasaysstuffsblog, @kasey-writes-stuff, @hexalianrebel-blackfeathers, @rand0m-s1nner, @cantsaythetword, @altheadajoysoul, @sarcasticgiggles, @snugglyfluffle, @switchydogboy, @kais3a

i hope you all have a splendid rest of your day!!

Rules: pick a song for each letter of your URL and tag that many people.

Tagged by @sailforvalinor, and thank you this looks like fun!

Remember and Proclaim (Andrew Peterson)

All I Ask of You (Jackie Evancho)

Innocence (Nathan Wagner)

Níl Sé'n Lá (Celtic Woman)

I Still Need a Savior (Billy Sprague)

No Strings (Ed Sheeran)

Take Me Back Road (Tim & the Glory Boys)

How Great is Our God (Chris Tomlin)

Everything Sad is Coming Untrue (Jason Grey)

El-Shaddai (Amy Grant)

Voice of Truth (Casting Crowns)

Endlessly (Amaranthe)

Not Alone (Red)

I'm an Open Road (Paul Brandt)

Never Leave Your Side (Sam Tinnesz)

Good to Be Alive (Skillet)

Hoo boy, can I think of sixteen people?

@griseldabanks @kraytwriter @kingofattolia @catkin-morgs @clawedandcute @nerdychristianfanboy @steampunk-archer @sergeanttomycaptain @smhalltheurlsaretaken @scribblermerlin @authortobenamedlater @stainedleather @mrtobenamedlater @mrgartist @get-loved-nerd @a-fount-of-blessings (Ignore if this is a repeat tag. Unless you want to do it again. Up to you. :)

[beheadable]

Have I said this already. I think it would be fun to review movies based on what I ate while watching. I’m only eating about half the time but I always remember what I ate for years after. The first time I watched The Texas Chainsaw Massacre I had microwaved frozen ravioli and put tomato sauce on it, when I made my mom watch it we had baked potatoes + the apartment heater was broken. When I saw The Retirement Plan dad and I had bacon wrapped chicken, broccoli, and instant mashed potatoes. The Last Temptation of Christ was our easter watch this year so it was easter left overs…… LOL

The first time I saw the Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou mom and I had cream puffs and wine. Cobra I had fry bread for the first time… The Great Outdoors was homemade lasagna. Skyfall is unique I had a drink wif it, sprite with crown royal apple, absolute favorite 😋 rewatching National Treasure was texas bbq and a twisted tea. Rewatching the first Night at The Museum was dr pepper baked beans + chips. Star Wars A New Hope rewatch was sushi from HEB……

[demurely1]

Drama Log 2023

This log is constructed according to ABF rules: I’ve recorded tv or film dramas viewed from Jan to Dec 2023 and graced by AB or one of his previous co-actors…. or some degree of separation ….  or not….

Father Brown (10) Claudie Blakley, Aidan McArdle

His Dark Materials (3) Ruth Wilson, Will Keen, Andrew Scott, Victoria Hamilton

Our Flag Means Death Joel Fry, Rory Kinnear

Vera Patricia Potter

Mystery Road: Origin

The Rig

Better Anton Lesser

Carnival Row (2)

The Cleaner (2) Mark Lewis Jones 

Great Expectations Olivia Colman 

Magpie Murders Lesley Manville, Daniel Mays, Harry Lawtey

Dalgliesh Sam Hoare, Deborah Findley

Maryland Eve Best 

Steeltown Murders Matthew Gravelle, Steve Nicolson

Annika Paul McGann 

The Gallows Pole    Samuel Edward-Cook

The Woman in the Wall Ruth Wilson

The Following Events are Based on a Pack of Lies Marianne Jean-Baptiste, Alistair Petrie, Romola Garai

All Creatures Great and Small (4) Sam West, Anna Madeley, Paul Hilton

Cobra: Rebellion Robert Carlisle, Victoria Hamilton, Marsha Thomason, Lucy Cohu

Boat Story Daisy Haggard, Paterson Joseph, Kate Dickie

Shetland (8) 

Vigil (2) Romola Garai, Amir El-Masry, Rose Leslie

Murder is Easy David Jonsson, Mathew Baynton, Tamzin Outhwaite